#at this rate i might have to make a 4th AO3 installment for paradiso shit anyway

[forabeatofadrum]

Paradiso 8 aka the one where *Simon* punches Gabriele D’Annunzio

Summaty: Again, what the title says, loves.

As always 😘 to @martsonmars. A sequel to Paradiso 6  aka the one where Baz punches Gabriele D’Annunzio. Where is Paradiso 7 you might ask? Great question!

--

2048

SIMON

“Three time’s the charm,” Rosemary casts. Her necklace is dangling from her hand, since Rosemary found out that that makes channeling her magic easier. (It does look more comfortable than her craning her neck all the time.) 

The spell hits Baz and he shudders.

Great.

“Are you sure about this, love?” Baz asks me.

“You started it!” I say back.

“Dads, please,” Rosemary rolls her eyes. She once again looks like she’s regretting this. At least this time, Baz and I were very upfront about our plans. My plans. 

My plans to revive Gabriele D’Annunzio again.

Rosemary then pointed out that this will be the third time that Baz will bring this guy back from the dead, so she decided to cast a Three time’s the charm on him to make his spellwork better. She’s dropped all pretenses of academic interest. She’s upfront about the fact that she wants to see this unfold. She’s only a bit annoyed by my reasoning behind this plan.

I need this to work.

Jealousy isn’t my strongest suit. I know this is petty and unreasonable. I can handle Baz joking about D’Annunzio being his good friend, but I draw the line at Baz calling D’Annunzio ‘the love of his life’, even when it’s in jest.

So, now I am the one punching him.

“Alright, Snow?” Baz asks me again.

I nod. Rosemary sighs and I hear her mutter “I never should’ve moved to Pescara” under her breath.

Baz points his wand towards the floating book in front of him. The book is showing the same photo of D’Annunzio like before. 

“La morte una cosa che non si pu fare due volte,” Baz casts and yeah, D’Annunzio really changed this by dying three times already. We’re adding a fourth one.

Is this ethical?

Probably not, but I need to do this.

Like the previous two times, a red spark bounces off the book onto the floor. The spark grows and slowly morphes into a human form. I know what’s coming next, so I look away. I am not a vampire, so I cannot handle this burst of light, but my husband and daughter have already described this ‘portal’ in great detail for me.

When the light dies down, a very alive Gabriele D’Annunzio is standing in our lounge. He’s befuddled.

Unfortunately for him, and fortunately for us, D’Annunzio doesn’t remember the other two revivals, so I get a kick out of asking “Signore D’Annunzio?” with a mischievous smile.

He looks confused and slightly afraid, but he eventually nods.

He’s about to say something, I take one step towards him and punch him in the face. 

“Lui è mio marito. He’s mine!” I yell for good measure.

Rosemary knows it was coming, but she still lets out a surprised grunt and Baz slaps his forehead.

Before D’Annunzio’s mind fully catches up with what the fuck just happened, Baz points his wand and at him and quickly say: “Uomo morto non fa guerra!”

The three of us watch how D’Annunzio pops out of existence.

“Did that feel good?” Baz asks after a small beat of silence.

I nod. I breathe heavily. I had no idea how intense this would be for me.

Did I ask my husband to temporarily revive an Italian poet who died in 1938 just to punch him because of petty, unreasonable jealousy? Yes, I did. It definitely felt good.

“Oh mio dio,” Rosemary sighs, “At this rate we’ll have to revive him again so that I can punch him.”

Baz and I share a look.

Rosemary notices and her eyes widen.

“Oh, no, no, no, dads, this is not happening,” she says. She turns on her heel and walks out before we can persuade her to do it.

Baz shrugs.

“We’ll keep it in mind.”

I nod.

“Yes, this is basically a family tradition. One day, Rosemary will punch him as well.”

“Can’t wait for it.”

--

End notes: You’ve heard of our good friend Jonathan Harker, so meet our good friend Gabriele D’Annunzio. This man keeps popping up everywhere, so when Marta joked that Baz calls him “the love of his life”, this happened.

Also, Marta, I hope that Google Translate was accurate with the basic bitch Italian phrases, since I didn’t want to ask you and spoil the (hopeful) element of surprise.