#at least until I start giffing everyone else lmao
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gatorbites-imagines · 2 years ago
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hii can i pretty please request the 141 + the other guys (könig, alejandro, graves, whatever lol) w/ a reader who just kinda repeats the phrases or last could words they say? kinda like a parrot lmao
i'm autistic and it's one of the things i do 💀
Cod Boys
Headcanons
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couldnt think of a gif to add, so heres a tiger.
I have a lot of Echolalia (repeating noises or words you hear) too, so same. I added Horangi too, cuz I love that guy and there isn’t anything about him in the x reader tags.
John Price
Price honestly finds it endearing, he thinks its cute that you repeat things he says, especially if you weren’t British and were to copy his accent. I could imagine him growing so used to it he doesn’t even realize you do it anymore.
He wouldn’t be annoyed by it either as its just part of who you are, and he’s just happy you feel safe letting yourself verbally stim around him. He also finds its fun to know what media you’ve been watching, or if you’ve been paying attention to what he’s said.
Kyle “Gaz” Garrick
Gaz would just find it quirky, he might even find it charming in a way. He knows its not something where you choose who or what you repeat, but he still likes that its him you repeat stuff from.
You both end up walking around and repeating the same things, you because you repeat stuff because that’s just how you are, and Gaz because he’s been around you long along to start to develop the same habit, but only when it comes to you.
Simon “Ghost” Riley
He is also autistic, but where you copy noises or words, he’s the silent staring kind. He doesn’t speak a lot as we know, so he’s a little surprised the first time you repeat what he says, especially when you don’t even seem to realize you’re doing it.
Ghost ends up developing Echolalia as well, but only copies stuff you say or things like animal noises, and only when it’s the two of you alone together as he masks around other people.
John “Soap” MacTavish
Soap loves it when you copy or repeat stuff he says or noises he makes, it finds it cute and special as its something just so you, at least in your group. He would never look down on you for it either, as its not something you can really control.
He has tried to make you repeat the dumbest stuff and there’s no stopping him, and if he succeeds, he just starts snickering. Soap laughing is what makes you realize you must have said something funny, which only makes him laugh even more.
Alejandro Vargas
Alejandro starts calling you bird or parrot as a nickname, especially if you are the type to copy animal noises. He finds it funny when you mimic Spanish words if you aren’t a native Spanish speaker.
He’s honestly impressed with how well you can say stuff in Spanish if it isn’t a language you speak. It just becomes a thing he finds comfort in, since it means your there, alive, and well. So if you were to go quiet for longer periods of time, he might worry a bit.
Rodolfo “Rudy” Parra
Rudy doesn’t speak as much as everyone else, so he finds it a little endearing that you repeat the stuff he says as it means you were at least subconsciously paying attention to him and what he said.
I could imagine Rudy liking to just sit together in mostly silence, so when he does speak there’s pretty much a 100% chance you’ll mimic whatever he said, which he finds nice as it helps him feel some kind of normalcy, since you are there with him.
Phillip Graves
He would think you were mocking him in the beginning, until he realizes it’s something you do with everybody and you might not even realize you are doing it unless someone points it out. He never says anything about it, since its just part of who you are.
Graves will rip someone a new asshole if they were rude to you about it though, he may be an ass to most people, but you are one of his so he watches out for you. He doesn’t show it but he cares, in his own way.
König
König doesn’t speak a whole lot outside of missions, so you’d most likely copy him during missions or similar. This ends up with you two repeating copy over and over, over the comms. It becomes almost a little game, which helps put you both at ease during stressful times.
If you copy his German hed find is sweet, as it helps him feel a little more at ease since he’s most likely far away from his home country. So even if you don’t speak German, it helps him come out of his shell a little.
Kim "Horangi" Hong-Jin
Horangi would think you were making fun or him or mocking him, but seeing as you just do it as regularly as you do and don’t realize he doesn’t pick a fight like he might have, if anybody else did it.
He ends up growing to like that you do it, and he will throw hands with anyone who tries to make you uncomfortable about it or insults you for it. He starts speaking more Korean around you, just wanting you to repeat words in his mother tongue even if you don’t understand it.
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reysdriver · 2 years ago
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Science Fair | P.P.
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You get paired with Peter Parker for an academic competition — peter x gn!reader fluff
warnings: bugs (but obviously like it's the gif lmao)
words: 1.3k
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The Midtown High Science Fair was about to begin for the year. The due date for signing up had passed, and all of the students were to meet in the school's gym so groups could be assigned. Since you weren't a huge fan of group work but didn't want to be alone, you signed up to be in the partner competition.
You traipsed over to the corner of the gymnasium with a table and signs that all said the words 'doubles competition'. Shortly after you arrived, several other students followed you to that side of the room. 
A crowd formed around you, and after a sufficient number of people had joined, a male teacher you didn't quite recognize stepped up to the table in front of you.
The rest of the students calmed their chatter, and all turned to face the aforementioned adult.
"Thank you for joining the Midtown High Science Fair. Here are your partners, changing of groups will only be allowed until next Thursday." The man said quite briefly before looking down at his clipboard.
"Brock with Leeds." He started.
You just waited anxiously for your name to be called, hoping you were with someone good.
"Parker with (y/l/n)." The teacher announced.
Parker like Peter Parker? Okay, that's not bad. You don't know him too well, but you share some classes and you know that he's pretty smart.
You turned to look at the crowd of students around you, seeking out your new partner. The teacher's voice droned on in the background as you found Peter Parker, who seemed to be looking for you as well. 
Your eyes locked for a quick moment before you both turned around and listened to the other groups being assigned.
After the teacher was done, everyone scrambled to find their partners and start with the project. Wanting to avoid the crowd, you stayed out for a few moments as everyone organized themselves. Once there was enough room to move around, you found Peter standing alone, waiting for you.
As stated before, you and Peter share a few classes, but don't know each other very well. You weren't even sure if Peter knew who you were, so the first thing you did once you found him was introduce yourself.
You held out your hand, ready for a handshake, and did just that. You shook his hand as you went to tell him who you are. "Hi, Peter, I'm—"
"(y/n) (y/l/n). I know, don't worry." He said, shooting you a faint smile.
"Oh, alright." You said, returning the expression. "Um, should we go figure out what we can do for the project?"
"Sure, let me just grab one of the sheets and we can go somewhere else." He said, reaching for a stack of green papers on the table. 
"Can you get one for me?" You asked. 
"Already done."
He smiled again and waved the papers in between you, starting to walk out of the gym. You followed him, though you weren't entirely sure where you were going. He led you into the library. Obviously, you thought. You signed in and found a small table for two near the resource books, and you got comfortable in your seats. 
"So," You started. "What are you interested in?"
"What do you mean?" He asked. 
"For our topic. What are your interests relating to science?" 
"Quantum physics." He said, causing you to let out a brief giggle. 
"Something that we could realistically do for this fair in three months." You clarified. "How about bugs?"
"What? I don't—" 
"Bugs always do well on these things. And they're accessible. We could do bugs as our project." 
He seemed flustered at your initial proposal, but after that bit of explanation, he looked like he was fine with the idea.
He agreed with you with a simple "Yeah, we should do bugs."
"We could do something like ladybugs, 'cause they're pretty tame and they're like the least horrifying of all the insects."
"Insects aren't horrifying." He said with a shrug.
"Well, you're far braver than I if you think that because just the idea of some bugs is—" You cut yourself off with an exaggerated shudder. "Earwigs and centipedes are just a 'no' for me."
"Well good thing we're doing ladybugs." 
A small smile graced his face, and you nodded slightly in reply.
"So we could do something simple like how they respond to medical stimuli like minor wounds." He said.
"Oh yes." You responded. "You know, I hear they're using bugs for medical reasons down at Oscorp."
He furrowed his brows a little, but quickly composed his expression. "Hmm, I wonder what they're doing with it."
"I know." You said. "I want to work there someday, actually."
"Me too. Maybe if this project goes well, we might be scouted or something."
"Then, we better get to work." You tell him, your lips slightly curled into a smile.
"Of course." He said, looking down at his paper.
"You can order insects online. People use them as composters, but we can buy them for the science fair if that's what we've decided."
"Sure, I'll order them when I get home."
You had spoken about the project until it was almost time for the library to close. Peter suggested that the two of you can meet at his apartment the next day to work more. You agreed, gave him your number, and he sent you his address. Then, the two of you said goodbye with plans to meet again the next day.
Of course, after some time had passed and you had double-checked your plans, you walked over to Peter's place. You knew the building, but only because an old friend of yours had lived there for a little while.
The elevator was broken, but it was only a few flights of stairs up to the boy's apartment, so you weren't discouraged.
After you had caught your breath from the walk, you knocked lightly on his apartment door. You could hear quick,  muffled footsteps followed by the door opening.
"(y/n), hi." He greeted you. "Come in. Uh, can I get you something?"
"No, I'm alright." You said with a polite smile. "The ladybugs were supposed to come this morning, right? Have they arrived?"
"Well, sort of." Peter said.
What does that mean, you wondered. You turned around to face him, curious to hear whatever he was talking about.
"What?" You asked. 
"They came," He said, cringing slightly. "but they're plastic."
He walked over to a small box by the door, bringing it over to you. You looked inside and saw about 200 ladybug shaped beads.
"I'll reorder them. Real ones, this time. I'll triple-check." He said with a small chuckle.
You let out a little huff of laughter, same as him, and looked up into his eyes. His really nice eyes, you noticed.
"Well, it's really not a setback. We're way ahead than most groups are right now, so it's alright. And I'll pay you for these as well as the real bugs, don't worry." You told him.
There was an awkward moment of silence as you both tried to think of what to say.
"Well, if there's no project for us to do, I suppose I should be leaving." You said. "I'll see you at school, or whenever the ladybugs come."
"Or," Peter said, his hand lightly gripping your wrist to stop you from leaving. He let go of you once you turned to him and locked eyes again. "you could stay."
"You want me to stay?"
"Yeah, I mean you came all this way." He said, sounding embarrassed. "It would be a waste for you to leave now. We could just hang out for a little while."
He looked at you, awaiting your response as a grin spread across your rosy cheeks.
"I'd like that very much, Parker."
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thatdeadaquarius · 2 years ago
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*casually slides into asks*
The Creator having to be taught the language of Teyvat, except they don't realise that each country has their own seperate language and so they are just mixing and matching phrases from each of the languages and no one has any idea what they are saying
*slides back out of asks*
Hello hello my regular customer 💃
Before u slide out, have a cookie for the road! 🤲🍪
Ok but this would actually happen to me
Im partial to the headcanon that theres a trade language in Teyvat, but each country has their own native language, w/sub-dialects too (i think thats the word?)
Just like what u said basically, bc like what if they dont have the trade one 💀 it rlly is just diff languages and im just over here like 😃🗨👋
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(Gif is u in the center trying to talk to other people on the sides lol)
Srry if uncreative or kinda a flop i am not a fountain of ideas as much as i wish to be😔🙏
This may be only funny to me...
But i did my bestest for you beloved regular <3
Also u didnt ask for this but u got it anyway LMAO <3
(sorry if i accidentally start callin u xiao pfp i couldnt find a name to call u by)
Ok but like?? Was anybody gonna tell you???
Or like r u so incomprehensible now bc youve mashed all their lingos together that they dont even recognize any of their languages anymore 😭😭???
Yall ever heard that meme sound that has like music playing in the background and its just a loop of a guy saying "..HuH?..HuH?...HuH?"
^^^Everyone else trying to understand you
..
...
.....?
WAIT A MINUTE ?!%
OH GOD OH NO PLEASEEDA@!?
I HAD THE WORST THOUGHTTT!!!!
DO U JUST SOUND LIKE A SIM TO THEM??!!!
😰😰😰😰🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲💀💀💀
CRYINGSOBBING
I CANNOT ESCAPE THIS INTRUSIVE THOUGHT PLEASE NOOOOO JDIOOALLFJSLAFQ
IM ACTUALLY LAUGHING ANDBCRINGING PLEASE -> GOD WALKS AROUND SOUNDING LIKE A SIM TO THE REST OF TEYVAT STOP
Ok but so many people r trying so hard to teach u their language more fully so u can commit to one at least
(Off the top of head, Thoma, Tighnari but if u keep mixing them more and more even on accident he gets too frustrated and accepts it lmao, Amber, Ningguang she wants ur first teyvat lang. to be Liyuean so bad, Kazuha just wants to genuinely understand u and you understand them aw what a sweetheart, Ei once again a person who wants u to learn Inazuman first lol, Zhongli, Jean, Ganyu, Alhaitham but he'd be a terrible teacher i can see it now, Ayato, Ayaka, Gorou, Yae Miko just so u can actually read her novels abt you + have bragging right lol)
..
...Its not really working
Which makes sense tbh, at least to me, bc i sure as fuck couldnt initially hear a big difference between Portugese v. Spanish, Korean v. Japanese etc.
Until i like, kept hearing it over and over and finally got it
(it was easier to differentiate between them on paper than auditorily?? auditorally?!? aUDITORIALLY??!! GODAMMIT IS THAT EVEN A WORD)
.
But I could totally see their languages just all sounding really similar to you, or like, theres some bits and pieces from each lang. that mimic others (pantalones Spanish = pants English for example, and its like all u catch are the "pant" sound so ur like?? Ok so same language right? Hence the mix and match)
So this happens on the daily these days,
U r still going and seeing people,
But nobody has managed to communicate to you that its all different languages lol 🤭
Like this below, happens all the time ⬇️
.
Ur having dinner w/ Kamisato clan bc ofc they wanna welcome u!! :D
And Thoma's there, and yall r at the Teahouse, Thoma just got out the hotpot (oh god🤢 ...wait is that you now, r u just like Venti saying oh Barbatos...?)
And they just started dinner but its already a problem w/ur ass LMAO
.
Thoma: "What do you want to drink Our God?"
You: "Ahfs kal aldsplease give me ahdhai?"
Thomas face just like "...😶🙁 oh no" HAHA
Ayaka trying to help him,
"Please repeat that Your Grace?" 😅
You, again lol: "I would dhkaied that aifjwe please :)"
U sound like a SIMMM TO THEMM 😭😭
.
Utter fail poor Ayaka is at a loss for once,
they're trying so hard to be polite and you havent even gotten a drink yet let alone the meal lmao,
Poor Thoma is struggling, hes just like,
"Um, uh, this one??" All worried bc now hes gotta point to the pitchers one by one until u either point or nod
AND THE REST OF THE DINNER IS JUST THAT SITUATION OVER AND OVER
U give up and just start nodding or pointing for food or napkins or drinks all like, "Oh wow my accent must be heavy today 😀🤷‍♂️"
Absolutely clueless, and they cant even figure out how to tell u lol
...
Oh god i dont wanna think about the chaos if ur also only understanding the basics of every language so not only do they not get all ur words, u dont get theirs 💀
Reminder :D = I have a ✨️poll for 100 follower celebration!✨️Yall get to choose what u wanna see me write about,✨️ Check it out!! :) ♡✨️
Cheers,
🌒🌧🌊Aquarius♒️🌌🌘
♡the beloveds:
@karmawonders
(Feel free to tell me if u ever dont wanna be tagged anymore i wont be mad/offended :] !! )
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Text
Things I Noticed While Writing Light The Fuse: Part 5, Episode 2
Turns out I had a lot to say again
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He's returned! And this is why I gave the Phoenixes their own private room lol okay so other than this room, which is clearly for the patrons to have fun in since there's a giant speaker in the corner, and the single motel room from ep1 we never see where these guys sleep. If they had their own trailers, Ethan might've been able to steal a couch from one of them, and if he had his own trailer then obviously he would've had his own bed.
Of course, that doesn't get him to the bar in five easy steps whereas crashing in this room does, so it's good for filming, but the Phoenixes live here along with everyone else, and they're always changing as they become Brawlers, so having one big room they can move their stuff in and out of (like a motel hehe) until they get their own permanent trailer makes sense to me! I'll make a visual layout of their room at some point since I see it very clearly in my head, so that'll go in its own post since I have limited images here
Matty looks great in this outfit btw 🥰
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Johnson's been back for two seconds and already he's reminding me why I love him the most 🥰 but I love this bit, Matty's highpitched giggle that makes me insane with how cute he is, him admitting he was scared and thought he really did it this time, Johnson vibing the whole way up to the bar and saying he wasn't scared at all before acting as their bartender, and Ethan just barely awake and following like usual
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Can't or don't, Matty? ;w; there's a big difference
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You're so weird that's so mean I'm in love with you
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Johnson not getting it in the least, Matty saying that and then it not even being real and Ethan not agreeing lmao what a shot
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The switch from Ethan telling the lie in the last shots, to telling the truth and getting uncomfortable, to Johnson picking up on that and changing the subject with a glance to Matty, and Matty taking the topic a lot more seriously than before always gets me. It really feels like Johnson wanted to hear the truth more than the story, just with the way he was watching him before steering the topic, like that look to Matty was because he knew how he'd feel about all this
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Look at this expression. He's not about to joke around here. Matty takes family so seriously, he's completely bought into Burt's promise and to hear Ethan talk about his family treating him like that has him serious, protective. I nearly wrote this scene in his POV because I really wanted to get into his head while Ethan was saying all this, maybe I'll call back to it when I'm writing season 2 because this feels like such a key moment to how he feels about him and him being one of them
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This expression too, this is someone who knows this is exactly who Ethan is and that he belongs with them and he's waiting for Matty to say the same, that's how I see this
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You know how I keep saying I'm gunna cry and we all know I'm only half joking? Yeah I teared up rewatching this scene again. It's only episode 2 and already Matty has fully accepted Ethan as theirs, part of the family. This isn't even ship talk this is them all drinking to the fact that Ethan belongs there and they both believe it. It's these scenes that make me love them so much and make me so damn emotional over them, why I think about them and instantly try not to start sobbing in public, and that's no joke.
The music here is also so beautiful, this is such a beautiful moment
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This is the face of a man who's starting to realize that they genuinely care about him here more than in Detroit ;w;
Phew, ended up giffing pretty much this entire scene again! I never know what I'm going to say about these apart from a few scenes, so it's been very surprisingly to me how many gifs I've had to make so far. I really thought they'd be more rare as I point out other things, but I guess I should've expected it since I'm predictable in how much I love them heheh see you tomorrow for episode 3~ 💛❤️💙
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sidprescot · 2 years ago
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i uhhhh finished 1899
(spoilers for all episodes below the cut, don't read if you haven't finished watching!)
GOD this show!!!!! i have been screaming internally for like 10 hours now and this is going to be so incoherent sorry
who else thinks the space ship at the end is just another simulation and the start of another loop? the season beginning and ending with maura waking up to a 'letter' from her 'brother', the ship also being called the prometheus, the technology also seeming out of place for the time period, being trapped in the vastness of space instead of the vastness of the ocean but it's still a prison.... could be totally wrong and it's just parallels but i trust nothing and no one on this (space)ship
literally every character on this show is so fucked up (affectionate) i am studying them all like bugs
i did guess that the boy was maura's son but i thought daniel was either an older version of him or her brother, the husband reveal fully knocked me on my ass because up until that point i was convinced they were setting up a maura/eyk romance which i 100% think was intentional clearly they have some connection outside of the simulation and the heart wants what it wants when you have amnesia lmao it's so valid of her tbh i too am making eyes at andreas in that coat
also hear me out what if daniel and elliot are both dead in the original reality (or never existed at all) and the versions of them that we see are actually AI created by maura to cope with her trauma... seems like elliot at least is dead or dying considering the grave bunker and his memory in the chair... if maura is the creator of the simulation, maybe she's also their Creator? what if she can wake up but they never can
tinfoil hat firmly ON
or alternatively what if daniel is actually the antagonist leading her deeper into the simulation OR maybe they're both literally exactly what they seem to be and he's just a guy who loves his wife and wants to save her from herself and also her fucked up family and also maybe loves his son sometimes i am sooooooo full of shit lmao it's 3am bestie
also i was NOT expecting olek and ling yi to fuck me up like that... they speak the language of LOVE ok do not perceive me
and speaking of that i've seen some people say that they feel like the simulation reveal took away the gravity of the death scenes but it didn't at all for me, for one everyone jumping overboard like lemmings off a cliff while you hear their bodies thunk thunk thunk was fucking haunting and that was the bulk of the deaths, but also i just think the implications of the whole thing fuck me up more on a psychological level when it comes to the main characters... they are all doomed by the narrative, new liver same eagles, this is going to happen again and again because they can't escape their emotions, they can't escape love or hate or rage or fear or desire or grief, they can't escape what it means to be human no matter how deep into their dreams and nightmares they go at the core nothing ever changes and it's fucking tragic
in other words, i ugly cried through most of ep 7
and then there's the triangle symbolism, the tattoos, 'what is lost will be found', 1011, some of the names being anagrams, etc etc
THERE ARE SO MANY LAYERS
everything is too real nothing is real at all they're alive they're dead they're in purgatory they're in a hell of their own making they are the glitch in the matrix they are the (literal) bugs in the code i am going to scream
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actual footage of me making this post
also i am definitely going to gif the show but i have a really busy week coming up and i'll be out of town for most of it so it might be a while unfortunately but just know the gifs are coming eventually they are living in my little brain as we speak
ok i'm going to shut up now if you read this far thank you, i love you, and i'm sorry lmao
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kase1248 · 3 years ago
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[Caption: 8 gifs of Alan Tracy.  End caption.]
     Favourite Things About Thunderbirds Are Go :: 1/∞ :: Characters
Alan Tracy
“Oh, so, what?  We’re just gonna sit here and accept our fate?”
“Unless you believe in miracles.  Bring any of those with you, Rocket Boy?”
“Maybe I did.  We’re International Rescue.  We make the impossible happen everyday.”
~
You ever have those characters that just walk into a room and declare themselves your favourite?  Yeah, in the Tracy fam, it’s Alan for me.  I don’t know why he, specifically, decided to be my favourite but he is.  Of course, he can be quite the obnoxious teenager (can’t we all?) but I still adore him and so many of his episodes rank highly on my favourites to watch: Comet Chasers, Deep Search, Impact and, of course, Colony; to name but a few.
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letsasoiaftogether · 2 years ago
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Targaryen x Otto Hightower...
...IMAGINE being the younger sister to Viserys and Daemon, and having some sort of tension with the Hand of the King that comes to a head a few months after the death of Queen Aemma
(I suck at summaries lmao/this is based between episode 1 and 2)
Word Count: 2,473
Warning: Character death (canon)! Death of an infant (canon)! FIRST ATTEMPT AT WRITING CHARACTER/S (so I apologize in advance for that!)
A/N: OKAYYYYYYYYY, this is my first EVER attempt at writing for Otto Hightower! SHOW!based as I’m not too knowledgeable about book!canon dance of the dragons stuff. I REALLY enjoyed writing this! I don’t know why but Otto Hightower just...has me in his grasp lmao wrote this in like three hours if that tells you how strongly I felt for this idea! lol I hope you all enjoy it! And thank you for giving it a chance!
(p.s. I’ve tagged this asoiaf and hotd, but should I tag these as got? lmao is this still technically game of thrones? how is everyone else describing this show? game of thrones? JUST a song of ice and fire and house of the dragon? lmao)
(GIF ISNT MINE)
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Your brother’s wife and son had only been dead for a few days when the talk of the succession started anew – just as bad as it had been for the last few years, but more urgent now that the King of Westeros was a widow.
By the precedent set at the Great Council eleven years earlier, your youngest-oldest brother, Daemon, was Viserys’ heir, but very few were fond of that idea and wanted either Princess Rhaenyra to be named heir or for Viserys to remarry and try for another male heir. The fact that the mourning period had even begun, that your House was hurting, didn’t seem to matter to the Small Council.
Logically, it didn’t matter. The realm needed certainties, not maybes, but that decision didn’t need to be made right then. Not that night. Or even that month.
Viserys was healthy, Daemon and Rhaenyra were healthy. Daemon was healthy enough to have children (if he ever decided to do so), and Rhaenyra was old enough to be betrothed (at the least) and married within the next year or two.
Seven hells, there was you even. Widowed for three years from a second son of House Tyrell, and the mother to two sons (neither who were likely to inherit Highgarden). You could be an heir to your brother if Viserys willed it, or your sons could until Daemon or Rhaenyra produced one.
All of this, and more, was what you informed the Small Council that night as you stood next to your King’s chair in the Small Council chambers, your hand tightening around his shoulder to give him some, silent comfort in the whole mess.
“…even if my brother agrees to remarry, the mourning period is a year. Unless I am mistaken, My Lord Hand.” You threw a sharp look at Otto, silently begging him to try and argue with you. Like you and Viserys, Otto was a widow as well – his wife having died just shy of two years earlier.
“You are not, Princess.” The man smiled, tightly, but softly at your words. The two of you hadn’t always been at odds. Often, the two of you were quite a united front at keeping Viserys on track and the realm prospering, but Otto had grown ambitious in the time since his dear, lady wife’s passing.
“Alright then,” you offered a small smile of your own and threw a glance around the room at the others in attendance, “The mourning period will be respected or there will be consequences.” Two heart beats, waiting to see if any of the men were going to argue or try to talk down to you. “If talks must be had, leave them for six moons. Allow our King to put the memory and his love for our, sweet Aemma to rest.”
Viserys sighed and you caught his gaze, the two of you smiling fondly at one another as your eldest brother took your hand in his own and brought it to his lips, kissing your knuckles. His sweet smile melted your heart. He was a good, gentle man, and he always tried to keep the peace in his House and his kingdoms…
“Now,” you murmured, leaning down to kiss his forehead just as your grandmother Alysanne used to do when you were a little girl, “I’m going to look in on my niece and the boys. Try to get some rest, Your Grace, please.”
“Give them all a goodnight from me, please.” Viserys whispered and squeezed your hand as you pulled away.
You promised that you would and then dropped into a perfect curtsy, wishing the Lords, knights, and Maester of the Small Council “the gentlest dreams” before leaving the room.
The Red Keep was dark, cold, and silent. With the King’s grief, the entirety of the royal court had taken to mourning as well, taking every voice from the halls, and leaving only whispers in the shadows.
Otto has always hated Daemon. He doesn’t want Rhaenyra, but he would back her if she was his only option.
Lyonel is loyal and intelligent. He knows that no one would truly follow Rhaenyra. They will only use her until someone better, someone with a cock came around.
Corlys backs Daemon and then Rhaenys. It’s only natural he would back his wife, but is it because he feels my cousin deserves the throne? Or is it because he craves the throne for himself?
The others would pretend to not have sides, but it was a lie. They all had their own agendas covered with the lie of being best for the realm.
“I was told, once, by a Lord of Winterfell, that the lone wolf dies but the pack survives.” The voice of your father, Prince Baelon the Brave, came to you suddenly and you had to catch yourself on the wall as loneliness and a long-buried grief came rushing to the surface of your heart, “It is the same for us, for Targaryens. One of us may die, but we are only at our strongest when we are united.”
You were ten when your Prince-Father told you that, and seven years later he was dead. His death is what prompted the calling of the Great Council later that same year. You hadn’t understood his words for a long time, but now…now you understood.
Everyone is frightened of House Targaryen because of the dragons. Without them, there is no true reason to have your family as the ruling House of Westeros. The realm followed the commands of the King on the Iron Throne only far enough to not be seen as treasonous; otherwise, they were self-serving and didn’t truly have your House’s interests at heart.
Daemon is seen as a cruel monster, the second coming of Maegor the Cruel. Rhaenyra is a girl of near fifteen; they wouldn’t easily follow her now just as they weren’t willing to follow Rhaenys eleven years earlier. And Viserys…the King was gentle and open handed, but he was so naïve that there was no way it wouldn’t come back to hurt the House of the Dragon once he was gone.
“Your Highness?”
A gasp slipped past your lips at the sudden voice, your head snapping up to stare at the servant who stood some feet away – hesitant and skittish. It was only then you realized you were crying and shaking, your face had been in your hands when the young girl’s voice had pulled you out of your grief-filled-thoughts.
“Oh,” clearing your throat, you wiped at your cheeks with the sleeve of your dress and tried to look as presentable as possible in your condition, “Forgive me I…it…”
The girl – not much older than your niece – smiled shyly and stepped forward, “Pardons, Your Highness.” She pressed something into your hand before curtsying and hurrying away, up the stairs to wherever she was meant to be.
It was a handkerchief and a small gesture, but you appreciated it, nonetheless.
Wiping at your eyes and blowing your nose, you took a few moments to pull yourself together before continuing back to the royal apartments to hold your sons and your niece.
*
“You’ve been sending Alicent to the King’s chambers.”
There was no point in trying to pass it off as a question. The two of you had known each other for far too long for you to try and play ignorant with him. Admittedly, you hadn’t meant to open the conversation with that but the moment you were let into his office within the Tower of the Hand, your gaze landing on him seated behind his desk, the words fell from your lips on their own.
Otto had looked up the moment you were announced, and as you accused him of overstepping by sending his daughter to Viserys over the last two months, he sighed and stood. “Princess,” he bowed and waved the guard away.
Once the door was shut and you had moved closer, putting only his desk between you and him, you asked, “To comfort him only, My Lord Hand? Or something else?”
“Alicent is looking after the King just as she did the last one, Princess. She feels…”
“You feel,” you corrected with a raised brow, arms crossing over your chest as you said, “Please, Otto, do not treat me like I’m stupid. Lady Alicent is doing as you and your brother have commanded her to do. It’s a risky game,”
“Your Highness,” the Hand began to say only to stop as you raised your hand, silencing him even if it pained him to do so (if the fisting of his hands at his sides was anything to go off of).
“Making your daughter the King’s mistress…” you let your voice trail off as you tried to bite back your temper and tried to think a dozen steps ahead of the man in front of you. “…I adore Alicent, just as I adore Rhaenyra, My Lord Hand. And as a widow, myself, I understand how our King – my brother – is feeling. Of course, only a fraction. Viserys loved Aemma far more than I loved my late husband. My brother and his wife had far more time together, of course, for me to fully grasp their devotion for each other.” Shaking your head, you moved around the desk and grabbed Otto’s hand in both of yours, trying to get him to see reason – to think carefully about whatever it was he was planning.
Holding his gaze, you whispered, “Viserys is not ready to move on. If he takes Alicent now…in any capacity…it will be nowhere near what your daughter deserves, Ser. Someone must be a voice for Alicent while Viserys is the voice for his grief and broken dreams, as you are the voice of the High Tower.”
Otto was silent for a long moment after you had finished speaking, his gaze locked onto yours.
His other hand had come up to cover yours covering his as you finished speaking. He had moved closer to you when you rounded the side of the desk, naturally towering over you in a way that felt comforting when you were younger, but now often left you…confused.
There had been a strange tension between the two of you for months, years maybe, that you had purposefully ignored – not yet ready to admit to yourself what you knew, deep down. It was never much of a problem until moments like this. When the two of you were on opposite sides, and although you felt strongly about your own opinions, more than anything you wanted to agree with him – to see things his way – if just to avoid hurt feelings and resentments.
“As the Hand of the King, I must do what is best for the realm.”
“Obviously,” you laughed, smiling teasingly as you tried to push away the nerves that were beginning to creep into your stomach.
The corner of his mouth twitched into a smile of his own as Otto continued to speak, “You don’t want Viserys to remarry, but I think we both know that he will not last without a companion of some sorts.”
You scoffed and rolled your eyes, pulling your hands free of his, “And you think Alicent is the best to do this? Better than…myself? Or some older noble woman from some other House?”
His jaw ticked as he questioned, “Would you prefer to be in her place instead, Your Highness?”
There was something about the way he asked it that set you off. Normally, you wouldn’t have been snappy or oversensitive, but something about the way he had worded his question – even with his voice being so monotone and impassive – made you defensively spit out, “Well, I have proven to be fertile and capable of producing male heirs which is the only true reason my brother would need to remarry, Ser. What does Alicent have besides a pretty face and ambitious relations?”
The Hand of the King who had served your grandsire and your brother, for many years, looked at you with a cool look that gave next to nothing away. If your words upset him more than they (naturally) would anger any man, you couldn’t tell. But he was bothered by them in some amount. Otto Hightower was too proud of his House and the name that had been made for it to feel indifferent toward your insult.
“I will ask this again.” Otto finally murmured, reaching out to brush a strand of hair behind your ear, his hand then moving to grab the back of your neck as if to keep you from fleeing the room (and the conversation), “Do you want to be the Queen of Westeros?”
You laughed, breathlessly, and shook your head.
All amusement was gone from you despite your short laugh. How could he ask that of you? How long had the two of you known each other? How many times had you commented on how being the King or Queen felt lonely and tiresome and suffocating? Did he think you had been lying all those years? Simply saying those things because Aemma existed and was Queen at the time making it impossible for you to be?
Grabbing his wrist, huffing when his grip only tightened when you tried to pull free of his hold, you finally answered his question by saying, “I want to be a mother to my sons, a mother-figure to my niece who is now without a mother, and an advisor and companion to my King. You know I’m not interested in Viserys like that, Otto. I would be a poor wife for him. I would be more likely to bed Daemon or Corlys before I would even consider doing such acts with His Grace.” And there was zero desire in your body to bed either the Rogue Prince and/or the Sea Snake.
Otto leaned downward and smiled to himself, “That…is good to hear, Your Highness.”
You opened your mouth to hiss some half-ass attempt at an insult at him, once again calling him out for his ambitions regarding Alicent and Viserys, but any thought of doing so flew out the window when the lips of the Hand of the King were suddenly pressed into yours.
He…Otto Hightower is…kissing me?
His free hand – the one not clutching painfully tight at the back of your neck – grabbed your hip and shoved you back against his desk, his body pressing into your own, drawing every bit of air from your lungs as he kissed you.
Your eyes widened, a gasp rushing from your mouth into his own as realization struck you of what was happening.
And then your hands flew up to grab at his upper arms, your eyes snapping shut as you kissed him back.
What in the Seven Hells is happening?
And why am I not pushing him away?
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commander-kirschtein · 4 years ago
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attack on titan social media headcanons
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how i think the 104th would use social media in a modern!au (includes eren, mikasa, armin, jean, marco, sasha, connie, historia, ymir, bertholdt, reiner & annie) - mac
masterlist
eren jaeger:
most used app: snapchat
still does streaks on snapchat - over 600 day streak with jean and to keep it going they just send insults to each other.
has the most cracked screen, it’s literally hanging together but he refuses to get a new screen until it no longer works.
would leave the house with 14% battery (this makes me incredibly nervous but eren knows he’ll be able to charm his way into someone giving him their charger.)
mikasa ackerman:
most used app: instagram or tumblr
mikasa should be hired by the fbi or something - give her a name and she will find all their social media pages.
i’m not sure what it would be but she’s definitely part of a fandom of a tv series or music group which is why she spends so much time on tumblr.
unlike eren, she actually has a case to prevent her screen from smashing - it would probably be one of those clear ones with flowers on the back, and she’d put in a polaroid picture of her and her friends in the back of it.
armin arlert:
most used app: youtube
he hasn’t got many posts on his instagram but a few of some pretty landscapes and a couple of group photos of him and his friends. his profile picture is of him, eren & mikasa.
literally could spend all day on wikipedia. he goes to google something but then falls down a rabbit hole. 
vsauce? asap science? random reddit videos? sign armin tf up. 
jean kirstein:
most used app: twitter or spotify
does gaming live-streams with eren. people watch not to see gameplay but to see the entertainment that is jean and eren’s competitive arguing (they play a lot of call of duty, mario kart, but also minecraft when they’re actually on good terms with each other)
gets into heated arguments with people on twitter. they go on forever because jean likes to have the last word/tweet.
you know those people that always have their headphones in? jean is that kind of person. he’d be sneakily listening to music during class (let’s be real he’s definitely got airpods.)
marco bodt:
most used app: instagram (& whatsapp because he’s in a lot of group chats)
the best hype man. comments on all of his friends selfies telling them how gorgeous they look.
he sends motivational quotes and wholesome memes to all of his friends which are always appreciated.
marco’s the one to put together group chats and ensure that arguments in them are smoothly resolved (eren and jean are usually the culprits.)
sasha braus:
most used app: tiktok
definitely makes very chaotic tiktoks/tweets that just blow up and end up on popular pages that repost to instagram.
her and connie would spam group chats with memes and selfies with stupid filters on. sometimes they’ll just target one person in particular (always jean) and they end up getting kicked or blocked.
her instagram captions tend to be random quotes and inside jokes from her friends (mainly connie) much to the confusion of everyone else.
connie springer:
most used app: instagram
has a private account on instagram just to post embarrassing pictures of his friends.
goes into conspiracy theory facebook groups just to troll the people in them.
out of everyone, the most likely to have games on his phone. when he’s bored in the car or during class he’ll just start playing geometry dash or temple run.
historia reiss:
most used app: tiktok
you know she’s got a tiktok with 100k followers. tiktok dance trends, makeup tutorials, look books - she does it all.
loves pinterest so much. gets a lot of outfit/home decor ideas from it - it’s likely that there’s a ton of photos of her on pinterest as outfit inspiration.
types !! like !! this !! and uses these emojis: ✨🌸💖🥰 way too much.
ymir:
most used app: facetime
half the time she’s on her phone is going to spent spent facetiming historia i can’t lie.
i personally hc that ymir in a modern!au would play either the bass or drums and i can just see historia begging to post a tiktok of her playing that then blows up - ymir would be so nonchalant about it but inside she’s dying of excitement.
probably has every group chat she’s in on mute - occasionally will lurk to see what’s going on, would only ever join in the conversation if drama was going down in which she’d send a gif of someone eating popcorn.
bertholdt hoover:
most used app: youtube or discord
likes to watch those reddit story time videos. would spend a good few hours watching them without even realising what the time is.
has 0 posts on instagram. cannot do any insta stalking of him (unless you looked through his tagged photos and find the ONE selfie he ever took with reiner.)
does a lot of gaming and uses discord to talk to his gamer friends (probably plays more story based/quest games compared to eren and jean - maybe like the last of us & skyrim!!)
reiner braun:
most used app: instagram
at least two shirtless pictures of him on his instagram (and way more if you’re on his private snapchat story - he likes to make it known that he’s at the gym. )
uses ‘lmao’ so much to the point he says it out loud not just over text
for some reason these emojis (👍👏👋💪) make me think of reiner ?? instead of replying ‘okay’ or ‘bye’ you just get ‘👍👍’ or ‘👋👋’
annie leonhardt:
most used app: spotify
follows so many cat accounts, she’s considering making her own to post pictures of her cat.
out of everyone, likely to be the person who uses social media/her phone the least, it probably overwhelms her quite a bit so unless she’s messaging someone (or looking at cats,) it’s unlikely to see annie on her phone.
does listen to a lot of music on spotify though - she’s got a study playlist, a playlist for when she’s at the gym, songs to listen when she’s just chilling at home - her spotify wrapped every year is pretty impressive.
BONUS:
spotify or apple music?
spotify: jean, mikasa, bertholdt, ymir, reiner, annie, sasha, historia
apple music: eren, armin, marco, connie
who sends memes into group chats?
eren, jean, sasha, connie, reiner
how long do they take to reply to messages?
replies instantly: marco, historia, sasha, connie, reiner
leaves you unopened for 3 days but then replies: eren, jean, mikasa, armin, bertholdt
leaves you on read: ymir, annie
who has the highest screen time?
eren, historia, sasha
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yeolmae-s · 3 years ago
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a chanbaek analysis from a veteran exo-l (part 2)
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CLICK HERE TO READ PART ONE
Writing this was a bit harder in comparison to the first part, because I wanted to organize things into a neat timeline, but I ended up not having enough patience for it lol specially because both of ChanBaek's main archive blogs seem to have deleted their pages documenting each date of EXO's early years. Therefore I apologize in advance if this part is a bit more messy. Also, please don't forget that all of this is my opinion and I don't mean for any of it to be taken as truth!
I kind of want to jump from MAMA era directly into Wolf era, since we don't really have a lot of cover regarding their debut phase besides Chanyeol's overeagerness and Baekhyun's awkwardness towards it, so to sum it up, I felt as if Chanyeol was more confident and consistent on what he thought an idol should act like, while Baekhyun (sweet, innocent Baekhyun who was a trainee for less than a year!) was still unsure on how to act on camera.
On the few early variety shows/interviews EXO appeared on, the members always pointed out how funny Baekhyun was, how good he'd be at variety and at doing imitations, but he never really lived up to all the praise on camera, although off of it, he most likely was as good as his members claimed.
He was a bit stiff on his early days in comparison to what we see today, and that's normal, I guess, since he debuted really quickly, but when you compare him to Chanyeol the contrast is so interesting, because the latter was able to latch on to a persona as soon as the public gave him one, while to me, Baekhyun was still doubtful regarding what to put on display. In the end, deep inside, Baekhyun is a private person, and was even more so when he wasn't confident enough to talk to fans like he does today.
Once again, I’m sorry for not being able to upload the gifs directly into the post, so I’ll just link them like I did on my last one.
This is another one of the moments where Baek appears to tell Chanyeol to just. Hold on for a bit.
There's another one similar to this where Chanyeol does the same thing (try to whisper on Baekhyun's ear) and Baekhyun fake laughs and stares at a fan's camera right after. Then, his expression just goes blank. It's really interesting to watch because you can just see the gears spinning on Chanyeol's brain as he stares at Baekhyun for a second and clearly thinks alright, fanservice time, and leans in to whisper something: it happens so fast you just know it wasn't genuine whispering, just a playful interaction for the fans, and Baekhyun's direct stare to the camera as soon as it happens just confirms this for me. 
1: Chanyeol spots his target.
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2: He’s really thinking this through.
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3: Baek's in a perfect position for whispering-time, so he leans in and does his thing.
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4: Baekhyun laughs.
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5: And stares directly at a fan's camera.
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6: Immediately regrets his life choices. Chanyeol looks pleased.
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It's actually better to watch the whole thing, so I'll leave it here. (starts on 0:28!)
(Random note: on this date EXO perfomed a cover of H.O.T's We Are The Future, and I feel like a lot of new EXO-Ls have not seem it and I adore this performance, so I'll link it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1-z4s3fdgo)
Now let's jump on to Wolf era, shall we?
Wolf era
I can't help but laugh when I think about how wild 2013 was for both EXO and EXO-Ls. They had their first hit song (which was Growl, not Wolf) the fandom grew considerably, shippers where just discovering the cute ISAC moments between "BaekYeol" and "HunHan"... Or at least that's how everyone remembers most of what happened during that year.
Are we forgetting the rumoured ChanBaek fight?
Considering their past interactions on airports, SMTOWN concerts, ISAC and other events, ChanBaek was now widely known to be close to each other. Baekhyun even said Chanyeol was the one who made him open up, and both of them mentioned feeling this "connection" to each other as soon as they met (although jokingly).
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After Mama, the fandom was content-less for a considerable period of time, and what most people did was sharing around old performances and repeat overused memes.  I think that in every fandom there is a period where fans establish their main inside jokes and basically just get together to create a collective line of thought for perceiving their idols. That being said, one of the most well established facts in the fandom was that Chanyeol and Baekhyun were close. That was a fact.But then Wolf came, and they suddenly were not. 
This gif is a good example of how awkward their interactions were. Not even my delusional shipping brain in 2013 was able to come up with an explanation for it.
They simply did not acknowledge each other at all, and Chanyeol appeared to be closer to Kyungsoo (I think Baekhyun interacted a lot with Tao, but that may have been during the Growl era, not Wolf. As I said before, I'm a Chanyeol stan guys, sorry lmao).
Point is, these two boys who seemed to be best friends suddenly were clearly distant from one another.
What added fuel to the fire of the rumours was their appearance on Sukira, a radio show, where Sehun cried because the members sometimes had fights. Here's a fanacc:
[130530] EXO at Sukira
Sehun cried because the members sometimes fight.
Sehun: "Let's be loyal to each other, don't fight, and go until the end"
D.O: "We've been under a lot of stress lately because of the comeback, so I wish we won't fight in the future and do our best"
Here's a video cut of this part of their interview. 
I think this ask on lets-talk-baekyeol, a popular ChanBaek analysis blog from back in the day, shows how curious a lot of fans were.
What happened back then?
There's really no answer for that. On my opinion, not even Chanyeol or Baekhyun could give us a concrete answer on it, because I don't think an actual fight happened. For me, it was most likely a personality clash, a disagreement that probably wasn't even voiced out loud, just both of them noticing how uncomfortable things got, if Baekhyun's reactions to Chanyeol's fanservice is any indication. I somehow doubt there was a specific episode that created this distance between them, specially because during Growl, they went back to being friends, although not as touchy on camera as before, as if one of them had established their limits (oh, I wonder who!), but I still have this feeling that all of this was unspoken, because unspoken things seem to be a pattern on ChanBaek's relationship (something I'll touch on later, hopefully).
But it was during Growl era that I noticed something else about Baekhyun.
Wolf era
EXO'S Showtime was a such a gift. I recommend reading lets-talk-baekyeol's blog for this. I don't really agree with everything they say they do present a lot of relevant points. I may repeat them here, since I noticed them myself as well, but credits for them nonetheless.
I remember finding the lack of ChanBaek interactions during the episodes really dissappointing, but considering the Wolf Era drought, this was better than nothing.
My 13 year old self was devastated when Baekhyun appeared so quiet during Chanyeol's birthday episode, and during a recent rewatch of it, I think realized why.
Baekhyun doesn't like superficial things. It's not that Chanyeol is insincere, but he's just better than Baekhyun is at handling people pleasing, even when he doesn't really mean what's he saying/doing. The Chanyeol birthday episode was heavily centered on Chanyeol's random admiration for Kai, which I think we can all agree that it was a little bit scripted or a really spur of the moment thing that they just ran along with and oh man. Baekhyun did not want to be part of it.
During ChanKai's hug, this is what he looked like on the background, and the poor boy even refused to eat cake. He's just in the back, which is weird, because he's such a talkative person and Chanyeol is one of his closest friends. The only moment where he seems to be genuinely comfortable is when Chanyeol blows the candle and it's really cute. To me, it seems that he was kind of embarrassed to witness so much acting from everyone else and was unable to participate because he struggles with things like this, but the moment Chanyeol blows his candles to comemorate his birthday seems sincere enough for him to fondly smile.
This ties in so well with everything from Mama Era. He's just unable to keep acting/people pleasing on the same easy way that Chanyeol does, but this time he's not as nervous about it as he was on his earlier-early days, where he probably felt pressured to actually do stuff. Now he just doesn't do **it, he just doesn't do something that he dislikes doing, and that sadly creates a distance between them on camera and probably on a deeper level in their relationship as well, because both are just realizing how different their perceptions over their jobs is.
There's also this moment that the mods on lets-talk-baekyeol pointed out.
On the Christmas episode, when the members leave the couch to go get their presents, Chanyeol stays seated while Baekhyun gets up to fetch his. This is the sitting arrangement before (almost) everyone got up:
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But when Baekhyun comes back, there's free space next to Chanyeol, however he's hesitant to sit by his side. He actually hesitates and doesn't sit down. Jongdae even gives him a little push right after.
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Baek just seems hesitant to do things on camera, to interact with Chanyeol in front of an audience. For this moment, I feel like he's afraid to sit next to Chanyeol and end up having to over act. It's not that Chanyeol himself makes him uncomfortable, but the image of the friendship that they ended up creating for fans demands a lot from him.
And when I say hesitant to do things on camera, I really do mean it, because when Baekhyun thinks he is not being recorded/seen, here's what he does:
Here and here.
Their relationship clearly changed, and I think the reason for it is actually simple: both of them were under the impression that they were compatible with each other when they actually were not. Their personalities are extremely different, even if the way they present themselves is sometimes similar. Wolf and Growl era was our way, as fans, of watching them navigate around each other and finding out how their relationship was supposed to work.
And you know what's nice about that? The members watched all of it unfold. Their reactions to some of ChanBaek's interaction is a gold mine when it comes to analyzing them, because they clearly know, just as we do, that their relationship is kind of complicated. But I want to talk about it on the next part.
I am sorry for cutting this off again! I don't know if the next part is going to be the last, because after Growl there's Overdose and we all know what happened on 2014 [coughs] dating scandal [coughs] god help me I don't want to talk about it [coughs] so there's a lot to uncover and I need time to organize stuff.
Thank you for reading!
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wildernessuntothemselves · 4 years ago
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Prey for You | Part 5
Genre: Smut, angst.
Word Count: 5.8k
Summary: After finding out what Chan really thinks of you, you’re determined to never let him in again. But he finds a way to sneak back into your bed. 
Warnings: super unhealthy relationship, dom!reader, sub!chan, milking but not the prostate way, use of a fleshlight, cumplay?, degradation, enemies to lovers,  wolf!hybrid chan, fox!hybrid reader
A/N: this is a major risk cuz i don’t even know if I’m done editing this lol so if its a mess let me know and I might fix it lmao. the gif is for the bath scene btw uwu
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 Part 5, Part 6
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You wish you could immediately move out and go someplace else, away from Chan and the constant reminder that you’re not good enough for him. But if it was that easy, you wouldn’t have had to move in with him in the first place. Now you were forced to live with the man who everyday reminded you of what you could’ve had if only you weren’t what you were.
For his part, Chan tries to apologize to you, but what use is his apology now that you have confirmation of what he really thinks of you? That doesn’t mean he has let up, though.
“Hey, baby.” The man in question greets you as soon as you come back from a lecture. “I wanna talk to you.”
You can’t keep going through this. Every time he tries to justify himself--to explain why it’s a good idea that people don’t know about you-- it just cements in your mind that he’ll never see you as someone worthy of him, of anyone. So you silently move past him, walking towards your room and hoping that the severe look you have on your face will discourage him this time. But it doesn’t, and he follows you into your room.
“I have something to tell you.” He announces and you turn to face him with an agitated sigh. “Then say it and go.”
You hope this will be quick, at least, but your hope is dashed when he crosses the distance between you and wraps his arms around you, pulling you towards his body. You open your mouth to curse him out, but the smell of him floods your nose with a spicier tinge to it than usual.  
“Oh.” Your mouth gapes in realization. ��You’re going into heat.”
He nods, leaning down to nuzzle your nose with his before going further, trying to catch your lips in a kiss, but his lips barely brush yours before you lean back, your hands pushing your body as far away from his as the embrace can allow. “So? That doesn’t change anything.”
“The hell it does.” He grimaces, not pleased with your reaction. “I need you.” 
“No, you need to get laid. You could get that from any of your groupies.” 
He scoffs in disbelief, “So you want me to go fuck other women?” 
You realize how far you’ve let things go when just hearing him say it out loud makes you want to fold in on yourself to protect your heart from getting torn to pieces. You shouldn’t have let things get this far. There is a reason you were so cautious before and you’ve gone and fucked yourself over at the first sign of someone being nice to you, of someone showing you the slightest hint of trust and affection. And you thought you were strong.
“I don’t care what you do.” You lie through your teeth, wishing to at least keep the knowledge of your shameful demise from him. “We’re not together.”
That angers him the most. “Yes, we are!” 
“Really? Because no one else seems to know.” You seethe, and he finally pulls away from you, infuriated at you as if you’re the one being ridiculous. “You’ve seen how my friends reacted. How do you think everyone else is gonna react?”
“That shouldn’t matter!”
“You’re just saying that because you don’t have anything to lose.”
“Oh my god, I can’t believe how full of yourself you are! You think I would be so damn honored if people knew I am with the pride of predators that you are?”
“Stop fucking saying that! Do I need to be a mindless brute to earn your respect as a predator?”
“No, but this--” You gesture vaguely towards him with distaste, “certainly isn’t earning my respect.” 
He takes a deep breath, face red and aggression rolling off of him in waves. You wonder if he’ll attack you like last time. But he just grits through his teeth, looking away, “What am supposed to do with my heat?”
“I don’t care.” You mutter, and his eyes snap to you, a little wild with fury. 
You hold your breath as he starts walking towards you, a muscle ticking in his jaw, and you imagine what it would be like if he were to snap it around your neck. Would it hurt more or less than you’re hurting right now? But instead of tearing your throat out, he walks past you and out of the room.
_____________________________
Chan has been gone for an hour now. And your mind was running wild with images of him fucking someone else. You feel stupid. You’re the one who sent him away, but what were you supposed to do? Give yourself completely to him until he has exhausted his need of you and throws you away? He’s made his stance pretty clear, and you’d be pathetic to let him use you like that. 
You're busy beating yourself when you hear the front door open, and you almost jump out of your skin. You whip around towards it, your treacherous affection hoping to see that Chan has changed his mind and came back to you, but instead your all too familiar bitterness takes hold of you as you see him stumbling into the apartment with a girl, their lips locked and their hands all over each other. 
You suppose there must be some truth to the phrase “if looks could kill” because the girl--a bunny hybrid--pulls away from Chan and her big eyes flit around the living room anxiously until they land on you. She squeaks when your eyes meek and she fearfully latches onto Chan’s arm. “You d-didn’t tell me you had a-a roommate.” 
Chan on the other hand is straight up grinning as he sees the murderous look on your face. He bends down to whisper something in the girl's ear that you can’t hear, but judging by the motion of his head and the direction she looks, you know he’s telling her where his bedroom is and to go wait for him there. She gives you one last nervous look before she scurries down the hall and disappears. When she’s gone, he struts over to you like a peacock showing off his feathers. 
“You look upset, baby girl.” 
“You’re a fucking bastard.” You spit out. He smiles wider and leans over you, pushing his hands against the back of the couch and caging you between them. "Last chance, fox. You gonna be a good girl for me or would you rather I go in there and fuck that pretty thing? I know she’ll be more than happy to do anything to please me."
You push him away roughly. He staggers for a second but quickly holds himself upright, grabbing your hands in a painful grip. “That wasn’t so nice, fox.” He grunts, pulling one of your hands towards his crotch and making you feel how hard he is. “But I’ll give you one more chance.” 
“You’re such a fucking slut.” You scowl, roughly palming his dick through his pants. He seems to love it though, biting his lip as a groan slips out of him. Vexed, you pull your hand back and get up, leaning up to hiss at him, "Get her the fuck out and come to my room."
His triumphant smile is met with a disgusted sneer from you. "You think you've won?"
“Kinda, yeah.” He laughs cockily. 
“Yeah, we’ll see about that.” 
_______________________
He quickly loses his smile when he steps into your room and sees the items you have on the bed--a fleshlight and a bottle of lube. He gives you a disheartened look. “No, no, this isn’t what we agreed on.”
“We didn’t agree on anything.” 
"I'm going into heat. I need to fuck you not some toy!"
“You can leave if you want. See if the little bunny isn’t too hurt to let you fuck her.” You challenge, confident that he will take anything you give him at this point.  
Groaning in defeat, he slumps down on the bed, and you smile knowingly, ordering him to undress for you. He obliges, although not without a sour pout. When he's naked, you gesture for him to come sit with you on the bed, back pressed against your chest as he settles between your legs. 
He is hard despite his protests, and you open the bottle of lube and squirt some of it on his cock, putting it down then wrapping your hand around him and pumping his cock slowly, just spreading the lube all over it. 
Grabbing the fleshlight with your other hand, you bring it to his lips. "Use your mouth, puppy." 
He groans, reluctantly peeking his tongue out to lap at the toy. You tsk in disapproval. “You’ll never get it wet this way. You’re really big, puppy.” You drawl, dragging your fist tightly up his long member and extracting a deep groan out of him. “Wouldn’t want your cock to get hurt when I fuck you with it dry now, would you?” 
He gives you a dissatisfied grunt but he pushes his tongue out more, starting to lick the opening of the fleshlight more deliberately now. “Good boy. Get it all wet so I can use it to milk every last drop of cum from your balls. Maybe then you’ll behave.” 
His hips buck up into your hands and he starts pushing his tongue in and out of the toy, the wet sounds of his tongue working the fleshlight filling up the room. 
"You're so pathetic. Eating out this silicone pussy so I can fuck you with it instead of sticking your dick in some bitch's warm pussy. All because I want you to, right?" You whisper in his ear before pressing soft kisses down his neck. His breath hitches and he pushes his hips up into your hands again, needing more than the gentle touches you were giving him. 
"You'll do anything if I ask you to." You state, pulling the toy away from his mouth, breaking off the tiny translucent strings of saliva that connect them. Letting go of his dick, you grab the lube again and order him to put two fingers out for you. You squeeze some of the lube onto them then bring the fleshlight to his hand. “Finger your pussy open, baby.” 
“You’re driving me crazy.” He groans as pushes his fingers into the toy, and you laugh. “Aw, is this frustrating for you, puppy?” 
“Yes.” He hisses, his fingers fucking in and out of the toy aggressively. 
“Good.” 
When you’re satisfied with how slick the toy has gotten, and how needy he’s become, you order him to stop and line it over his cock. “Ready, puppy?”
“Ready as I’ll ever be for a fucking toy.” He swears and you smile, plunging the fleshlight over his cock. You don’t need his enthusiasm to do what you want as with a few jerks of the toy, he’s already melting back onto you and moaning out his pleasure, his impending heat already working him to the edge of insanity. 
“See? You’re nothing but a horny dog trying to get off.” You use your free hand to massage his lower belly just above the base of his member, stoking the fire building there. “I should lock your dirty cock in a cage during this heat so you won’t go around humping and fucking whoever you can get your hands on. Only let you out when I want to use you.”
“Then use me, please. Take what you need from me.” He moans even louder, his back arching and his hips fucking up into the toy. “Sit on my face and make me eat you out until I can't breathe or sit on my cock and ride me until you've had your fill.” "And give you the satisfaction of giving me pleasure? No, you don't even deserve that. You'll just sit here and take everything like the selfish dog you are." You slide your hand up his body, brushing your fingers over his nipple. He instantly jerks and tries to close his legs but a harsh growl in his ear is all that's needed for him to swing his legs back open. 
“See? You’re already gonna cum, aren’t you?” You mock, reaching your hand out to grab the small glass cup you left at the bedside table and placing it under his cock.
“What are you doing?” Chan sputters, confused and embarrassed. 
“Wanna see how much cum you have for me, puppy. Show me how bad you need me.” You coax, taking the fleshlight off and using your hand instead, stroking his cock from bottom to top and pointing the leaking tip of it inside the cup. 
“Ahh---that’s filthy.” Chan protests but his eyes are glued to the scene and his moans get higher in pitch as you both prepare for him to orgasm. Your hands continue their rhythmic pumping as spurts of white cum start shooting into the glass, almost as if you’re manually squeezing them out of his dick. 
“That’s a lot of cum. Such a horny dog.” You murmur, taking in the amount of cum collecting in the glass, and he shudders, transfixed by the way your hand is milking every last drop from him. “And you’re wasting all of it. What a useless pup. Should’ve never been a wolf.” 
He growls and lays his head back on your shoulder to look up at you.You think he’s going to argue with you about what you just said but instead he stares at you with his puppy eyes and breathlessly asks for a kiss. 
You could refuse him, of course. He doesn’t deserve it. But you want it too, his plump, red lips too enticing to pass up, and so you close the distance between you and capture them in a lazy kiss. But you barely start before he’s squirming and whining against you. 
“I suppose you still have more to give me.” You murmur against his lips and start moving your hand over his dick again--the wet sounds from your lips against his and your hands over his dick soon filling up the room.
“Such a big boy.” You marvel as you pull away from his slick lips to gaze at his dick, his breath stuttering when you swipe your palm over the leaking head. “But you won’t even get to use it because you’re a dumb, selfish pup.” 
He blinks tiredly at you, apologetically, but you’ll have none of it. 
“Ready to fuck your toy again?” You ask haughtily, and he sighs, nodding defeatedly. 
“There you go.” You put the toy back on him. 
You’re surprised by how vocal he’s being. He’s the loudest you’ve ever heard him. You guess the heat was getting to him as he doesn’t even try to hold back, his moans lusty and shameless. He’s so consumed by the pleasure taking over his body like he’d die without it, and honestly it’s affecting you more than you’d like to admit, your panties sticking to your heat uncomfortably.
"You sound like a whore getting fucked.” You scoff, pumping his dick faster with the fleshlight. "Are you that desperate?" 
“Hmm--yes! Please...fuck me--” He cries, easily giving in as his hips jolt up. “Need your hot---ahh--wet pussy around my cock. You can milk me all you want then. I’ll be all yours. My cum is all yours.” 
“But I don't need to do that when you’re already being such an easy slut for me.” You move your hand up to his chest again, rubbing and teasing his nipples.
"But you want me--" He gasps as you pinch his nipple in retaliation. "Fuck me, please. Need your pussy--oh god.”
“You don’t need it, dumb puppy. You’re cumming fine enough in this toy.” You put your lips to his neck, sucking on the sensitive spot under his ear then laving over it with your tongue. 
“But I want more.. And I know you want---ahhh, fuck--fuck!" He cries out, looking down in time to watch himself empty into the cup again. And like last time, you make sure to catch every last drop. 
“Hah--please.” He pants, leaning back to look up at you, his eyes focusing on your lips. “Kiss...” 
You sigh, kissing him. He doesn’t have to be instructed in this, his lips opening automatically and his tongue pushing needily into your mouth. As his panting moans pick up again, you pull away. 
“Please fuck me.” He draws the request out, pleading. 
“No.”
He whimpers at your definite tone and huffs. “Then let me see you at least.”
“See me?” You quirk an eyebrow at him and he nods earnestly. "Wanna see you."
You move out from behind him and settle between his open legs. “Here I am.” 
But his gaze isn’t on your face, it’s glued to your hard nipples poking through your tank top in arousal. 
“Ah, you wanna see my tits, puppy? Will that help you cum more for me?” You pull your tank top over your breasts, exposing them. He whines at once, struggling to stay in his spot, his tongue swiping over his lips hungrily. 
"What is it? Wanna put suck on them, puppy?" You tease, sitting up and leaning your chest over his face, your breasts just out of reach of his mouth. 
“Yes! Please, can I?” He begs, and just his breath brushing against your nipples is enough to have you rubbing your legs together. You don’t even want to imagine how fast you’d cum if he put his hands on you.
Tangling your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck, you push his face into your chest. “Go ahead. You better make it worth my while.”
His mouth immediately latches onto one of your nipples, lathering it with saliva and sucking on it eagerly.
"Fuck, that's a good boy." You hiss, grabbing the fleshlight and pulling it over his cock, not wanting to get distracted. But the faster you work him, the more eagerly he kisses and sucks at your tits, his tongue hungrily licking all over your chest and his teeth insistently nibbling at the skin. 
It's so good the friction you’re getting from rubbing your legs together is enough to make your orgasm build up. You're both impressed and mortified that you can feel yourself getting close just from jerking him off and having him suck on your tits. But you can't dwell on it too much, too busy trying to get him and yourself off. 
You get what you want when he flicks your nipple with his tongue then wraps his lips around your entire areola and sucks harshly, ripping the orgasm from your body. Gasping loudly, your movement over his cock stops and your head drops down. But Chan quickly reaches out and grabs your jaw, pulling your head against his so he can see your face as you cum, the both of you wide-eyed and breathing heavily as the orgasm shakes your body. 
"Fuck." Chan grunt, his hips bucking up into the stationary fleshlight as moans flow through his spit-slick lips. You can tell he’s almost there and you pull the fleshlight away and reach for the cup but it's too late, his seed shooting out and landing on your belly, marking you with it and trailing down slowly towards your pussy.
"Shit, sorry." He groans apologetically but he’s too weak to do anything about it. Exhausted from the three back to back orgasms, he falls back to the bed, boneless. 
You sigh, setting the cup down and getting up to grab some tissues to clean yourself up. When you walk back to the bed, you find Chan struggling to keep his eyes open. 
“No, no, get up. Come on, you need to wash off.” You tug on his arm, but his body is too heavy to budge. 
“I’m too tired.” He whines like a puppy trying to get out of a bath.
“You won't have to do anything. You just sit in the tub and I’ll clean you up.” You try to pull at his arm again but he just buries his face in the pillows and ignores you. You sigh, running your hand over his skin patiently. “Come one, don’t you want a nice, warm bath? Wouldn’t it feel good after all this effort? It’ll loosen your muscles right up.”
He lifts his head up, regarding you, and you brush the hair out of his face softly. “Come on, puppy. I’m tired too.” 
He finally complies, getting up and letting you tug him towards the bathroom. You don’t give him a real bath, you just make him sit in the tub while you scrub and clean his body, letting the warm water stream over him and wash the soap and tension away. 
By the time you’re done, he was starting to doze off again. He looked really cute like that, his eyes almost all the way closed and his lips in a slight pout as he tries to keep his head up. 
You pat his cheek gently, drawing his attention towards you. “Get up, pup. We’re done.” 
He nods groggily and slowly stands up. You dry him off with a towel then lead him to your bed, telling him to wait a minute while you go grab something for him to wear. You know he likes sleeping in only his boxers so you just grab that and come back, handing it to him to put on while you go grab a towel for yourself. 
“I’m gonna go take a shower. I want you back in your room when I’m back.” 
Your words jolt him awake, his eyes wide and alert suddenly. “What? But I thought...” He trails off, looking at you as if asking for you to help finish his sentence. Which is just ridiculous, you don’t, of course. You stare at him with a blank face until he continues in a small voice, "I was hoping I could stay."
“What gave you that impression? You thought you could manipulate me into fucking you and then everything will be fine and dandy?”
“No. I just really miss you.” He states helplessly, and tears spring up into your eyes at that. 
I miss you. You’re special. These are all meaningless words that just serve to put another stab in your heart and remind you of what you’ll never actually have from him. 
“I don’t have the energy for this right now.” You say weakly, turning your back around and heading for the door quickly. “Just leave.”
As soon as you get into the shower, you start to sob. You feel like shit. You've gone through so much abuse and ridicule before but this has to be the worst you’ve ever felt about yourself, for yourself. You have so easily given into him. He’s got you where he wants you again, and he didn't even have to compromise anything to get it. You just walked right into it like an idiot, and now you fear that you feel too much for him to get out of this intact. 
You stay a long time in the shower, waiting for your tears to dry up, but they never do. All you can manage is to get them to stop streaming down your face like the water does, holding them in your eyes and hoping the long shower allowed enough time for Chan’s scent to disperse from your room. 
But when you walk back into your room, towel wrapped snugly around your body, you find Chan himself still in there, sitting on top of your newly made bed. And just like that, the tears fight to be shed again.  
“I changed the sheets.” He pipes up, looking at you for approval. 
“Oh, you changed the sheets? I guess I have to let you stay now.” Your retort is weak and hoarse.  “Baby…” He stands up and walks over to you, reaching a hand out to tug at your own gently, but you quickly snatch it back and take a step away from him, 
”Don’t.”  Your voice cracks and you turn away in a panic, not wanting him to see you shed any tears for him. But it's useless as he easily turns you back towards him and wraps you in his strong arms. “Hey, what’s wrong?” He asks like he genuinely cares.
"You're what's wrong!" You sob, trying and failing to to get out of his embrace.
“Don’t say that.” He pleads, wiping your tears and kissing each of your cheeks despite your struggles. “Please, don’t cry.” 
“How can I not when I’ve fallen in love with you.” You scream the words at him, hoping that the sheer heartache your voice contains will cast him away from you. And for a moment it seems to work as he staggers at your confession, his face a look of pure shock. This is it. He'll finally take pity on you and stop messing with you. Or at the very least he'll realize that this game isn't fun anymore and he'll back off.
“Just leave me be, please.” You plead, trying once again to pull away from his now loose embrace, but as soon as you move, he snaps out of it, his grip tightening around you even more. Pushing his forehead against yours, he breathes out, “I love you too.” 
Before you can think about it, you raise your hands to scratch at him, anything to defend yourself from the continuous torment he’s subjecting you to. You only manage a weak swipe at his cheek before he has both your wrists in his grip and pinned to your back. 
“What the fuck are you doing?” He curses, the tiniest bit of blood seeping out of the fresh wound in the middle of his cheek.
“Stop playing with me!”
"I'm not playing! I love you." He shouts back at you, and his words hurt like a dozen pellets piercing your skin. Because either he’s sick enough to lie about this, to continue playing with you despite how precarious your position has become, or he really does love you but his disgust at you is so great that it doesn’t matter.
"How can you say that when you’re ashamed of being with me? How can that be love?" 
"You're one to talk! I'm always the one trying not to lose you and you're always the one pushing me away. What does it matter whether people know about us or not when you’re fucking crying at the mere fact that you fell in love with me?"
“I'm crying because the man I fell in love with is so ashamed of loving me that he won't even defend me in front of his friends!"
"And if I do? If I tell everyone that I love you and take all the damage and then you inevitably leave me?" He accuses, so sure of his words like he knows it will happen. All the fight leaves your body at that. He’ll never trust you, will he? 
"Why are you assuming the worst of me?" You snivel weakly.
"No, you can’t pull that shit!” He rages, “You don’t have the right to treat me like shit and then cry about the fact that I don’t trust you! I have every right to be scared that in a couple of months you'll look at me and remember how much of an impotent predator you think I am and drop me."
“Then why do you keep me around?” You ask in a small voice, scared of the answer. 
“I… I don’t know.” 
You laugh bitterly, but Chan stays silent, rooted to his spot and waiting for you to do or say something. You can’t handle this anymore, not now at least. Every time the two of you talk, you hate yourself more. You need to get away from him or you’re afraid you’ll collapse into a void of self-loathing you’ll never be able to pull yourself out from. 
Sighing wearily, you slowly shuffle to your closet. You drop your towel and put on some underwear before you start pulling on a pair of pants and a shirt. 
“What are you doing?” Chan fumes as he realises what you’re doing. “Are you going out?!”  
You stay silent as you pick out some shoes and put them on.
“Are you fucking kidding me? You can’t go out right now. We’re talking!” 
You ignore him once again, walking towards the door. He tries to intercept you, face red, “You’re not leaving!”
“Watch me.” You say coldly, going around him and walking out the door. 
___________
You didn’t have a place in mind when you went out. You just needed to breathe, to get some fresh air. But you soon find that too sobering, the fresh wounds hurting too much for you to feel them right now. So you decided you’ll do the opposite, stop feeling. And how do you do that? Everyone’s favorite poison. And so you head to the nearest bar you can find.
You’re barely finished with your first glass when you hear a deep voice digging its way through your fuzzy hearing. “Hey! You’re that fox from Chan’s place, right?” 
Your heart stops at the sound of his name, and you stare at the empty glass in your hand, determined to ignore the intruder until he goes away. But he just plops down into the seat across from you, exclaiming ever louder. “It is you!”
You stay silent, and he carries on, thinking you don’t recognize him. “I’m Felix by the way if you don’t remember.”
You still don’t give him any response, but he doesn’t give up. "I'm sorry, I didn't really get your name last time..." He trails off, looking at you expectantly. Your gaze shifts to him and he falters when he sees the dead look in your eyes.
After some pause, he drops the cheery look from his face, and says somberly, "Look, I know you probably hate us all because of what happened, and you have every right to, but I just want to apologize for what my friends said. They're really good people but they can be a lot misguided."
You snort mockingly at that, but he seems encouraged that he managed to get any form of response from you, and he continues on. “But you probably don’t want to hear that right now. Anyway, I just really wanted to apologize. I know how it feels to be distrusted because of what you are.” 
That gets your attention, and you look at him closely, realizing he is a cat hybrid. They get the same lot as fox hybrids, albeit less severe if the fact that he’s friends with Chan and his pack is anything to go by. 
“But you’re friends with them.” You comment suspiciously. 
“Well, it’s because Chan took me under his wing. When he trusted me, the others did too. I kind of owe him a lot.” 
“Ah, yes, the Perfect Chan agenda.”
“He’s definitely not perfect." He clarifies quickly, and you quirk an eyebrow at that. "Don't get me wrong, I love him like a brother but he can be really stubborn sometimes. He can never let himself be wrong about anything ever or else he'll start spiraling."
“No offense--umm, Felix, was it?” You ask and he nods eagerly, happy that you're talking. “If I wanted to chat about Chan I would've talked to one of his groupies.” 
His face blooms red and he sputters sheepishly, “You're right! I just wanted to apologize.”
“Apology accepted.” You say dismissively, waving him away, but he stays, and you give him an exasperated look.
He breaks eye contact, his gaze dropping to his hands.Fiddling with the cup in his hands, he mumbles quietly, “Can I hang out with you for a bit?”
“Now why would I say yes to that?”
He thinks for a while, a pout on his face as he concentrates on finding an answer that will satisfy you. You can see the exact moment an idea pops into his head as his face lights up with a mischievous smile. “Because it will piss off Chan?”
“A kitty after my own heart.” You reach out to pet his head, chuckling at the blush on his pretty face intensifies at that
 ____________________________________
Felix is something else, you’ll give him that. He’s sweet and cute and he radiates so much warmth and happiness. He’s different from the usual cat hybrids who are cold and aloof even if secretly affectionate. You had wondered at the beginning how a cat hybrid can be so close to Chan and his pack, but it took a whole five minutes of being in his company for you to see it. Simply, Felix exuded a pure, happy energy that was infectious to everyone around him. Even you, down in the dumps and heartbroken, were starting to feel a little better in his presence. 
Or maybe that was the inordinate amount of alcohol you have managed to consume throughout the time you spent together. And you guess it was quite some time because as soon as you stumble through the door to Chan’s apartment, the wolf is on you like a dog with a bone. 
“Where were you? I was worried sick!”
“Now that’s a funny joke.” You slur, laughing stupidly.
“Are you drunk?” He bellows, sniffing you out. Then he suddenly freezes, a low growl rumbling out of him as he grabs you roughly, glaring at you with wild eyes. "Why do you smell like Felix?"
"I met up with him." You shrug, maddeningly jubilant to the livid wolf. 
“What?” 
“I. met. up. with. him” You repeat slowly.
"You went out drinking with Felix?" You grits carefully, and you swear you can almost see his eyes grow dark and menacing. But you’re too blissfully drunk to heed the warning storming inside their depths. 
"Sure did." You reply nonchalantly. 
"I told you…” He says slowly, lips curling around the words and infusing them with a cold fury.  “to stay away from my friends."
"We were just talking." You insist stubbornly, needing him to see for once that you’re not the twisted monster he thinks you are. “He said he’d like to be friends.” 
Chan’s grip tightens even more around your arms, so much so that it pierces through the foggy numbness of your intoxication. The pain brings about a sense of sobriety, and your breath stills as you become aware of much danger you were in right now. 
But Chan wasn’t going to hurt you. Not physically at least. 
You feel the blood return to your arms as he lets you go, a look of revulsion and contempt vilifying his face more than anger or violence ever could. 
“Stay away from him.” He commands roughly, “I actually care about him.”
Any numbness you had gotten from the alcohol suddenly leaves your body and you crash, feeling all the pain all at once. 
I actually care about him. Unlike you. And you’ll sully him if you get close. 
“This--” You gesture between the both of you, face completely devoid of emotion. "is over."
________________________
A/N: you guys still want them together? because I think the next chapter will be the last. i mean it won’t matter anyway cuz I’m pretty settled on the ending lol but I’d still like to know
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shuahoonie · 4 years ago
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holidays with tom [tom holland]
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PAIRING: tom holland x female!reader 
SUMMARY: life isn’t exactly back to normal. with another lockdown in place and the holiday season is vastly approaching, you and tom are stuck in quarantine with each other the problem? there was supposed to be at least 5 of you in that house and tom is the last person you want to be with. shouldn’t be too bad right? 
WARNINGS: in no particular order swearing—err foul language lmao, sexual innuendos, things get heated but not that much??? exuding sexual tension but also fluff??? alcohol consumption, a series of bad decisions??? idk writing this made me experience the 5 stages of grief tbh lmao it’s not that bad I promise lmao
WORD COUNT: 6.9k! 
A/N: hello and happy new year! I was supposed to post this during Christmas Day but guess who got into a writing rut—yet again. I didn’t want to abandon this because I actually had fun writing it. I hope you all had a festive and safe holiday. I know things have been hard but I still hope you guys enjoyed the holiday. 
2020 has finally came to an end and we’re all ending it the same way when the pandemic started—staying at home, hopefully following the appropriate health measures. I can only hope that 2021 is a brighter and hopeful year for all of us.
stay safe, sending u all my love. 
gif credits: @underoos-shield​ 
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Two hours. It’s been two hours since you found out that you were going to spend your holidays alone. You were aware that you weren’t going to spend your holidays with your family as you normally would, embracing the fact that working in a different country whilst in the middle of a pandemic was going to be challenging. 
Working in the film industry, constantly visiting sets while still living in a pandemic means that you threw away your chances of being home for the holidays. However, you weren’t entirely the only one who shares a similar struggle. 
“We should still do something for Christmas, you know,” Tom muttered as he watched you lay down on the sofa, your head is supported by the armrest. 
See—it should’ve been you, Ophelia, Alex, William, and Tom in that AirBnB, not just you and Tom.
The five of you reside abroad, however, you all had to fly to Los Angeles for work. You all collectively knew that it would be irresponsible to fly home for the holidays and it wouldn’t make any sense as you would all fly back for work anyway. 
The five of you had a brilliant idea of renting an AirBnB for the holidays since you were all in each other’s personal and work bubble anyway. Obviously, the three of them bailed as they’ve decided to stay with their partners instead, leaving you and Tom alone—which is the last thing you’ve wanted. 
“There’s just us two, Tom,” You replied as you sent a lengthy text to Ophelia, telling and reminding them about what happened between you and Tom.  “I’m not entirely sure if it’s worth anything if we did plan on doing something remotely festive.” 
There are four more days till Christmas and if you were being honest, the last time you felt festive was on the 18th of December...of 2019. 
“Surely there’s something we can do, right?” Tom’s optimism still shined beneath him. “This year has already been shitty enough, we don’t need to feed more into that.” 
The three dots bubble immediately popped up on your message thread with Ophelia as soon as you sent your passive-aggressive rant. Your focus was now on your phone. 
Suddenly, Tom’s face appeared on top of yours—his face was definitely close enough that it’s not CDC approved. He was standing on side of the sofa, both of his palms planted against the armrest as he loomed over you. 
“What do you and your family do during Christmas?” He dared to ask as if he wasn’t towering over you.
Your eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. “Uh—give each other personal space?” You answered out of sheer reflex. You always had a problem with keeping your mouth shut, especially when it sounds rude to other people. In your defence, being unable to do so has helped you put people back in place. 
To be fair, you were used to people standing at least 6 ft away from you ever since the pandemic started. 
Tom’s cheeks went bright red. “’m sorry,” He apologized, giving you a shy smile and scratched the back of his neck. You muttered a quick apology too, for acting so rashly. 
You rose from your position and sat upright instead. “Well, we never do anything special during Christmas,” You said as you threw your hair into a bun. “We usually just go to the movies on Christmas Day because that’s the only thing you can do back when life was normal.” 
Tom nodded understandingly as if he was taking this into account. Now you were curious. 
“Do you guys do anything special for Christmas?” You asked him. 
“Well, on Christmas Day, we would usually just lounge around the house and use it as a chance for me and my family to catch up,” Tom replied. “However, on Christmas Eve, my mum always made sure my brothers and I would have this scavenger hunt to look for our gifts—It’s really fun, actually.” Tom smiled sadly. 
You could easily see how Tom was genuinely broken about not being able to be around his family over the holidays. Heck—he really just misses his family. But who wouldn’t? Britney Spears didn’t sing the line “my loneliness is killing me” for nothing. 
“I’m sorry,” was all you could say. Aside from biting your tongue, being able to easily comfort people was one of your weaknesses too. 
“Oh, there’s nothing to be sorry about, darling.” Tom quickly dismissed the genuine heartbreak he was trying to hide. “We’re all making sacrifices and we chose to be responsible for the benefit of other people.” 
“Yeah, I know.” You said softly. “We’ll just try our best to make something out of this holiday season. I mean—we have to or else we’ll welcome 2021 with a fresh face of misery.” 
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“I’m sorry!” Ophelia pouted at the screen as they mindlessly walked around their partner’s place, something that most people do when they’re on the phone with someone. “I genuinely forgot about what happened between you and Tom.” 
“Well, Ollie, it seems like you weren’t the only one.” You replied, adjusting your glasses. Tom seems to be genuinely fine around you, no awkward tensions or anything. If anything, it’s just you who feels weird around him. “But I guess that’s a good thing right?” 
Ophelia forced a smile but they couldn’t, for the life of them, say anything about it. 
“Oh my god,” You sighed “Seriously, Ollie?” 
“It’s just—how could he forget?! You were literally on top of him as I recall and that very much left a permanent image on my mind. I—You know, I really tried my best to forget that ever existing in my mind. So really, if anything, it’s your fault.” Ophelia rambled on. 
“I—I wasn’t on top of him. That’s absurd! I was merely pressed against him” You said defensively, in which Ophelia just laughed atrociously. “Why am I friends with you again?!” You asked rhetorically, bewildered by the fact that you two lasted this long. 
“First of all, that is a hate crime. Second, I’m cool—like everyone wants to be my friend and you should be glad that I gave you the privilege to be even on a nickname basis as me.” 
You rolled your eyes at them. Despite the never-ending banter, you were grateful to have Ophelia as your friend. 
“But seriously, Y/N,” Ophelia said, “You can always just stay with me and Ericka. She’ll be glad to have you over for the holidays.”
“Ollie, as much as I love spending time with you two—I can’t stand being a third-wheel, especially when it comes to the both of you. You two are inseparable when you’re together.” You replied. “I appreciate the offer though.” You smiled at her. 
“I’m just saying—” Ophelia replied, shrugging her shoulder. “Unless you and Tom really want to have the house by yourselves.” They sang teasingly.
“Ophelia!” You gasped. 
“What?” They feigned innocence. “I gave you an option to stay with us! Plus, I know Alex and Will are would’ve asked you to stay with them if they had any idea what happened between you two.” 
“I can’t leave him!” You started to whisper “Tom seems genuinely bummed being here. I can’t just do that to him.” 
It’s as if a light came on inside them. Ophelia started to smirk and you recognized that smirk from anywhere. For christ’s sake, their eyes twinkled like Christmas lights. It drove you nuts. “I fucking knew it.” 
“What?” 
“You like him don’t you?!” They teased, but all you could do was blush. 
“I do not!” You denied it as you could still feel the burning heat emitting from your cheeks. 
“His tongue is that good huh?” Ophelia decided to pry even further. They clearly find enjoyment as you squirmed your way out of this conversation. 
“Bitch, I am ending this call.” That was all you could say. Even if you did find a smart retort, it was no use, especially with Ophelia. They can see right through you and there’s no point in trying to hide it. 
“Honestly, Y/N, we’re living through a pandemic. If there’s any time to make any rash decisions, it’s now. Go get that dick, bih—” 
You drowned out whatever Ophelia was trying to say with your goodbyes and proceeded to end the call. The one time you asked your friend to be serious and they come up with this. 
So—what really happened with you and Tom? 
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It was two years ago. You were at a party that you didn’t even plan on attending. However, you were dragged by Ophelia and their partner, Ericka—your new friends in the area. You couldn’t say no to them, they were your first friend in LA! 
You thought about it though, saying no. But when you got a message from your friend back in Canada sending a photo of your boyfriend ex-boyfriend (the same guy who had ghosted you ever since you moved to LA), swapping spits with another girl, you suddenly had the strong urge to drink until you die of alcohol poisoning.
You were burning with anger that you really felt tears pricking your eyes. You were so close to crying or punching someone—whichever comes first.  
One thing’s for sure, though, you weren’t going to cry over a man. So what did you do? “Ophelia, where’s the booze?!” You asked your friend whose eyes nearly popped out of their head. 
Well, you weren’t really going to punch a stranger. Though you felt this burning sense of violence, it’d be much more satisfying to punch the living daylights out on your ex. 
“Y/N, honey, are you alright?” That line always puts on the waterworks, no?  Ophelia was clearly concerned about your newfound thirst for alcohol. 
You furiously wiped the tears off your face. “Um just found out my boyfriend—er ex-boyfriend, who stopped talking to me as soon as I moved here, is seeing someone else now? I don’t know, am I allowed to feel angry when I don’t even know if we’re still together as soon I moved? Fuck—” You tried to explain as you wiped every tear that left your eyes. 
“Oh—of course, hon.” Ericka who handed you a drink. You weren’t exactly sure what it is, but you knew it has alcohol in it and that’s all that matters. You gulped the entire thing and you wanted more. “Y/N, you need to slow down.”
“Are you sure you want to stay? I mean we can crash at our place, eat take-outs, watch movies and be totally disconnected from the world.” Ophelia suggested, but you shook your head furiously. 
“No, I—I’m ok.” You answered “I can’t let the both of you be stuck in misery with me. I need this. I’ll get drunk and if I'm up for it, I’ll hook up with someone. It’s not a healthy coping method but I really want this night to be a series of bad decisions. I don’t want to be myself, even just tonight.”
 So that’s what you did. You were going from one drink to another in record time. Both Ophelia and Ericka kept an eye on you, just in case someone tried to take advantage of your drunken state. 
You were talking to some guy you met in the kitchen, one thing led to another and next thing you knew, you were making out with this dude in someone’s bathroom. Ophelia and Ericka were drunk enough to pester the guy you were making out with but not drunk 
As you were propped on top of the sink and your legs wrapped around his waist, you felt every bit of his lips explore the side of your neck as his hands explored every inch of your body. With his hand under your shirt and his fingers tracing every part of your skin, it just reminded you of how lonely you were. 
Here you were, a thousand miles away from home, all alone just so you could do the one thing you really love. Your family would sometimes call to check up on you but it just wasn’t the same. Your ex tried to guilt you into staying in Canada, but you couldn’t do that. You love what you do and you love yourself too. 
You were willing to risk everything, even if happiness came at a price. 
Now you were crying, and the guy you were making out with definitely noticed. 
“I’m sorry, am I making you uncomfortable?” He asked as he pulled down your shirt. 
“No—no, I’m just—” You tried to calm yourself down. “I’m not sure if I want to do this anymore.” 
“That’s alright,” He mumbled wiping the tears off your face. “Do you want to talk about it? You seem rattled.” 
“It’s just I’m so tired of pretending everything is alright—that I’m okay being alone, that I don’t need anyone. But it’s just so hard because I’m—” You sobbed “I’m so fucking lonely. I’m so tired of being alone.” 
The guy tucked the stray piece of hair behind your ears as he carefully wiped your tears with his thumb. He was just silent as he listened to you sob. 
“I’m sorry, I know you definitely didn’t come to this party to watch a complete stranger cry over something stupid.” You couldn’t even look him in the eye, you were embarrassed as this was the first time you felt really vulnerable—especially in front of a stranger. 
“No, you’re alright.” He tried to console you “I think that’s the beauty in strangers, no? You can act and do whatever you want in front of them because there’s a slim chance you’ll ever see them again.” 
You were definitely drunk enough that trying to make sense of who the person was a struggle enough of itself. You tried your best to look at the guy but your vision was getting hazy and you could feel your head thumping that focusing made you feel like you want to crack your head in half. 
A loud knock on the door caused you two to jump. “I’m coming in,” Ophelia yelled and opened the door. Ophelia looked at the guy for a while, trying to make sense of who he was before their eyes widened. “I remember now—You’re Tom Holland.”
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Imagine your surprise when you found out that you were going to work with Tom Holland for a while. You tried your best to avoid Tom at work but of course, that didn’t work out. He never brought up what happened between you two and you assumed he probably forgot all about it.
You tried to rationalize that he meets a lot of people every day. Surely, one failed hook-up wasn’t worth remembering (especially with alcohol involved) and you held on to that. 
At least that’s what makes you sleep at night and also one of the reasons why you considered spending the holidays with him. However, you were also expecting your crew friends to stay with you and not just Tom. 
“Y/N, did you like the gift? It’s from me and Ericka!” Ophelia asked. It was the next day and you two were just chatting on FaceTime. You were sorting out your closet out of sheer boredom. You figured if you were going to stay here for three weeks, the least you could do was sort your clothes out. 
You stared at the neatly wrapped box that Ophelia and Ericka dropped off earlier this morning. “I haven’t opened it yet.” You said as you showed them the box. “I wanna open it till Christmas.” 
“Oh my god, just open it. Christmas doesn’t exist this year, babe.” Ophelia waved their hand, encouraging you to open it. 
“Fine,” You gave in. You opened the box and saw a very lush and well-made lingerie set. “Ophelia, what the fuck” You gasped. You held out the lingerie in front of the camera. 
“Y/N, I definitely outdid myself this time.” Ophelia sighed happily, staring at the screen. “Try it on!”
“Ollie, this is gorgeous but when am I ever going to use this?” You asked holding it out on your body and looking at the mirror. 
“Uh—you’re stuck at home with your failed but also potential hookup,” Ollie suggested, wiggling their eyebrows. “Who knows what might happen?”  
You rolled your eyes at them. “Bold of you assume that something might happen.”
“Something won’t happen if you don’t try that one,” Ophelia said. “C’mon, I wanna see.” 
You shook your head and went out of frame in order to strip off your clothes. You tried on the lingerie—it’s a black lace teddy with a very exposing back. IT fit you perfectly—it accentuated your figure and definitely showed off your boobs. You weren’t really fond of showing off your body but you still tried your best to show it to your friend. 
“What do you think?” You asked, stepping back to the frame. 
“You look gorgeous, babe!” Ophelia squealed. “I knew I made the right choice with black.” 
“I still don’t know where I should wear this though—” You were stopped mid-sentence when your door swung open. 
“I know what we’re doing this—Oh shit. I’m so sorry,” Tom stood there, frozen, his eyes widened and immediately shut the door. 
You couldn’t even say anything. You were frozen in shock.
“Was that Tom?” Ophelia asked from the call, briefly forgetting that you were talking to them through FaceTime. 
You nodded slowly, unable to talk.
“What did he think?” Ophelia asked excitedly. 
You snapped out of this haze. “Ollie,” you groaned. “I think he was mentally scarred. 
“What do you mean scarred? You look great!” Ophelia said, appalled. “If he doesn’t think you look banging in that lingerie then it’s his loss.” 
“I gotta go, I need to change.” You said, bidding Ophelia goodbye. “Thanks for the gift, Ollie. Tell Ericka thanks too.” 
You ended the call and changed into comfier clothes. You couldn’t help but wonder how on earth you’re going to face Tom now that he’s seen you practically naked. Well, it’s not like that’s a new sight. He did see you with your bra on when you were making out in the bathroom that one time. But still! 
Are you actually going to spend your Christmas in your room?
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It was the next day and there are only two more days till Christmas. You spent the entirety of last night in your room after the incident between you and Tom. 
You were about to make yourself some coffee when you found Tom in the kitchen, making tea for himself. You stood there frozen, wondering if you were going to proceed to the kitchen or just run back to your room since Tom hasn’t noticed you—
“Oh—good morning, Y/N.” So close. 
You smiled at Tom and said, “Good morning, Tom.” 
You grabbed a coffee pod and waited for the Keurig to make your coffee. You leaned back against the counter and fiddled with your phone—all in the hopes that things move quickly and for this awkward tension to be over. 
Honestly, why were you so worked up about it? People have seen you in a bikini before and that’s no different from lingerie. If anything, lingerie is itchier and has lace. You should be able to feel confident in your own body and you shouldn’t have to mind what other people think of it. It’s yours alone and it’s your opinion that should matter—
“I’m terribly sorry about last night, Y/N.” Tom apologized, sincerity was written all over his face. “I should’ve knocked and I just got so bloody excited about what we can do over Christmas—but that’s no excuse for what I’ve done. What I did was incredibly intrusive and you deserve a proper apology.”
“Tom, I—”
“I wanted to apologize last night—over dinner—but you didn’t come down to eat, so I figured you didn’t want to talk. “ He rambled on. 
“Tom—” 
“But even then I should’ve asked you to come down and eat dinner because that’s what any decent human would do! And yet I didn’t. God—I’m just doing one wrong thing after another—” 
“Tom, listen to me.” 
“Hm?” He finally snapped out and looked at you in the eyes. 
“It’s okay. It was an honest mistake and you sincerely apologized, and for me, that’s enough.” You smiled softly at him. “So—what’s this thing you planned over Christmas?” 
“I was thinking we could do both our family traditions over the next two days. My family and I usually do a roast dinner and open our Christmas stockings on Christmas Eve. Then on the 25th, we can watch movies all day just like you do with your family.” Tom grinned, clearly satisfied with his plan. “What do you think?”
“I think it’s a great idea,” You smiled “However, I don’t think we have any ingredients for a roast dinner and we don’t really have Christmas stockings. Well—I don’t have any Christmas stockings and stocking stuffers.” 
“That’s true,” Tom mumbled “But I have to do the food shopping anyway. We’re running low on food and I couldn't really book one of those online delivery things that most groceries now offer.” 
You nodded. “Okay, so I guess I have to get the house sorted then.” 
When you two first arrived in this AirBnB a few days ago, it had already been decorated for Christmas. It had a massive tree in the living room decorated with stunning and intricately-themed ornaments. Christmas garlands were wrapped around the stair-bannisters and foliages were placed by the fireplace and the tables. 
All you really had to do was clean the place—do a bit of vacuuming and get things nice and neat for Christmas. It didn’t take you too long to do it too. It had only been a couple of minutes since Tom left to do the food shopping and you prayed to the gods that he doesn’t get too much attention whilst out. 
You figured you might as well do some last-minute shopping while Tom was out, so you can grab gifts for him as well. After all, this whole thing was orchestrated by Tom and you don’t even have anything to give him for his stockings. 
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You arrived at your AirBnB a tad later than Tom. He was in the kitchen putting things away when he saw you walk through the door. 
“Ah, I was wondering whether I spooked you with my plan,” Tom commented, making you chuckle and roll your eyes. 
“Trust me, I would’ve made it very obvious if you did.” You replied, earning a laugh from Tom. “I went out to do my last-minute shopping. Granted, it’s not ideal since we’re still living through a pandemic, but there’s not actually that many people where I went to considering it’s the Christmas rush.” 
You made sure to hide the stuff you bought using the handmade tote bags that a friend gave you for your birthday. No retail bags, no clue. “How did you survive the groceries? I bet it’s busy out there.” 
“Yeah, it was.” Tom chuckled, scratching the back of his head. “Remind me to never do that again for Christmas.” 
“Sure,” You said, “That is if I spend another Christmas with you.” You said jokingly, hoping that Tom didn’t find that rude. 
“You’ll never know,” Tom shrugged. “What if you liked our Christmas this year and you’d be begging to spend Christmas with me and my family in London,” Tom smirked, playing along. 
“Yeah, right.” You scoffed playfully, crossing your arms. “If anyone’s begging, it’s going to be you.”
Tom stepped closer, “Wanna bet?” He whispered, a teasing look in his eyes. “Whoever has the most fun during our respective holiday traditions would have to spend the holidays with them next year.” 
“Oh, you’re on, Holland.” You took a step closer. “We will both film our holidays for the entire two days and then we’ll ask Ophelia, Alex, and Will to vote whoever looks like they had the most fun.”
“Okay,” Tom nodded “But no editing! We’ll give them raw footage so there are no chances of tampering.” 
You laughed but you agreed anyway. “Of course, we’ll give them hours of footage. The least we could do is make them sit through hours of content after they ditched us all alone on the holidays.” 
Tom gave a broad smile. “Let the festivities begin.” 
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It was the 24th of December—Christmas Eve. You spent the entirety of last night wrapping Tom’s presents for later. Not that you despise Christmas, but it’s been a while since you were actually excited to celebrate it. It was pretty clear that the magic of Christmas dies once you grow up. 
Today was different; you were looking forward to whatever Tom has installed for tonight. 
You went downstairs to make some breakfast only to be greeted by Tom blasting Christmas music and preparing some ingredients for breakfast in the kitchen. 
“Good morning, Y/N, happy Christmas Eve,” Tom greeted with a huge grin. “Say, hi to the camera.” 
“Oh, we’re starting this early, huh?” You asked, putting your hair into a loose ponytail. 
“Why of course, we have to make the best out of this,” Tom said, holding the camera to your face. “I made you coffee.” Tom handed you a cup of coffee. 
“Are you using my love for coffee as an advantage?” You tried to hide your smile while drinking your coffee. 
“Obviously not,” Tom feigned his innocence. “I obviously did not know you were obsessed with coffee—it’s not like I don’t see you on set without one.” He mumbled in which you definitely heard, giving him a smack on the head. “Ow! I’m kidding.” He laughed.
You rolled your eyes at him. “So, what’s for breakfast?” 
“We’re going to make french crèpes,” Tom replied and propped the camera on the kitchen island, facing the two of you. 
“Do you know how to make french crèpes?” You asked, washing your hands. 
Tom blinked, almost trying to decide whether he wants to be honest or impressive. “Do you know how to make french crèpes?” He returned the question. 
“Oh honey, my mom resents me in the kitchen.” You replied, taking a sip from your coffee. “But you know, I manage.” You murmured.
“That’s giving me a lot of hope, darling, thank you.” He said half-heartedly. 
“Shut up,” You nudged him playfully, rolling your eyes. “Tom, honestly, most of the footage is just us bantering for 20 minutes.” 
“To be fair, that’s part of the fun.” Tom smiled. “Okay, I think you just mix all of these in a bowl. Start with the dry ingredients first.” He said, looking at the recipe on his phone.
“Okay, that shouldn’t be too hard,” You commented pouring the ingredients into the bowl. As you started all of the ingredients together, you noticed small lumps forming in the batter. “Tom, did you sift the dry ingredients by chance?” 
“You were supposed to sift it?” He asked, completely clueless. 
You nodded slowly. Panic was now clearly painted on his face. “I’m sure we’ll be fine.” You tried to reassure him. 
It was not fine. The first time you two tried to pour the batter in the pan, you burnt the entire thing. It’s not even the cute, lightly burnt crepe. It was activating the smoke alarm-burnt crepe. 
The next one was pancake-like. The next one after that had pocket flours on the crepes because you two didn’t sift your dry ingredients beforehand. You ran out of the batter when you two finally got the consistency right—you managed to get one proper crepe from the entire batter. 
“I feel like Sam would probably curse me out as soon as he finds out I fucked up a simple crepe,” Tom said, delicately filling the crepe with creme and berries. “My brother’s done so well in culinary school.” He cut a piece with his fork and brought it to your mouth.
“Well, you can’t have everything.” You said taking a bite out of the crepe. “This is better than the last one.” 
Tom nodded, taking a bite of it himself. “It’s not as tasty as Sam’s but I’ll take it.” 
“Now, I’m curious as to what your brother’s cooking tastes like.” You commented taking another bite from the crepe. 
“I guess I’ll just take you home to London to find out,” Tom teased with an annoying grin. 
“As long as I’m being fed, I’m fine with it.” You remarked. What in god’s name are you are you two playing?!
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The day rolled by very quickly. It was already evening when you finished wrapping the presents for your friends. You plan on dropping it off tomorrow before you persuade Tom to glue yourselves on the couch for the entire day. 
You grabbed all of Tom’s gifts—Christmas stocking included— when you went downstairs, only to be greeted by someone yelling at Tom through his phone. 
“I did everything right, Sam. I don’t know why you’re yelling.” Tom yelled back at his phone. His back was turned against you as he was putting away the pots and pans that he used. 
You quietly walked up behind him and said calmly, “Why are you yelling?” 
Tom probably jumped six feet away from you, making you laugh. You always forget that he gets scared easily. “Holy shit, don’t scare me like that, Y/N.” Tom breathed out, putting a hand over his chest. 
“I’m sorry,” You said whilst laughing. “I promise I won’t do it again.” Tom rolled his eyes, murmuring something about you being insincere about it. 
“Please do it again!” You heard, whom you assume is Sam, say from the background. You looked at Tom’s phone that’s propped on the island and saw his brothers on FaceTime. 
You beamed at them. “Any recommendations?” You asked, hearing Tom groan behind you. 
“Well, he hates—” 
“This is the last thing I want in 2020, for my brothers and Y/N to conspire against me,” Tom said loudly on purpose, drowning his brothers' voices.
“Tom, don’t be rude. Let your brothers finish—” Tom put his hand against your mouth. 
“I’ll call you guys later,” Tom said “Wave goodbye, Y/N.” He used his free hand to grab your hand and forced a wave towards his brothers. The call soon came to an end and you could only roll your eyes at Tom. You seem to do that a lot around him. You also do a lot of that when you try to hide your feelings towards a person you like but that’s beside the point. 
“So are we going to have dinner first or are we going to do presents first?” You asked fixing your Christmas sweater, a gift from your parents since you and your family usually wear matching sweaters for Christmas. “Or are you the type to wait until Christmas Day to open presents?” 
“We can do the Christmas stockings after dinner tonight, then do the presents tomorrow, if you’d like,” Tom answered with his arms crossed. 
You shrugged, telling him it doesn’t matter since you don’t really go all out on Christmas. Your family on the other hand—the house is always full of people, especially since most of your extended family are usually around during the holidays. You had this ongoing game you made for yourself whether or not you’ll be able to greet everyone with the number of people in the house. 
You could only guess how quiet your family’s Christmas is going to be. You definitely needed to call your parents later. 
“Is the sweater that itchy, Y/N?” You heard Tom ask, breaking away from your thoughts. 
“Huh?” You asked, confused. You didn’t even notice that you’ve been scratching yourself subconsciously. 
“You’ve been scratching yourself since I saw you.” Tom said, chuckling. “It’s a cute sweater on you.” 
You smirked. “That reminds me—I got something for you, Tom.” Tom raised his brow as you grabbed the bag you stashed behind the tree. “Actually my parents got this for you. A little thank you gift apparently for having the tolerance to stay with me over the holidays—as if you had a choice.” You mumbled the last part. 
Tom curiously opened the bag and there revealed a matching sweater such as yours. This year’s sweater was green and had red tinsel all over it, probably the reason why you’re itchy. The real kicker is that—
“No way,” Tom gasped “It lights up?!” He asked laughing. It lights up. 
“Yeah, I don’t recommend turning that on. I did it earlier and I’m pretty sure I was about to combust—it’s a real fire hazard.” You replied, enjoying the genuine joy that Tom is showing on his face. 
“Oh but we have to turn the lights on when we take pictures,” He commented as he put on the sweater. “Thanks, Y/N.” He said softly, surprising you with a hug. 
It’s the first real physical contact that you two had ever since that night when you made out and you were pretty adamant that people were just making up this notion of having butterflies in their stomach—they weren’t. 
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Tom’s roast dinner went surprisingly well. You kept teasing him that it’s Sam that you had to thank because you knew that Tom wouldn’t last in the kitchen without his brother’s instructions. Tom pouted the whole time. You eventually had to tell him 
“It was sweet.” You told him as you helped him clear out the plates. 
Tom was confused. 
“I don’t think I’ve known someone that went through hell and back just to make a great effort Christmas dinner —even if it means getting yelled at by your brother.” You said, smiling softly at him. “I mean it’s just us two, really. We don’t even have to do this.”
“Think that’s the reason why I wanted to do it,” Tom replied. Now you’re confused. “It’s because it’s the two of us—that’s why I wanted to do it.” 
As soon as you heard those words come out of Tom’s lips, you tried your best to stay calm. To say that you weren’t overwhelmed with emotions would be a huge lie. For someone who couldn’t hold their tongue, you were speechless. Tom’s giving you a run for your money and you weren’t exactly thrilled about it. 
After dinner, you and Tom opened your stocking presents. The presents were pretty tame at the start—you both got each other socks, which was hilarious but greatly appreciated. You love socks, especially comfy and cushiony ones. You came to learn that Tom does too, which prompted you two to wear the socks immediately. 
You got him candy canes, he got you chocolates. You also snuck in those small, in-flight alcohol bottles in there too—which he ended up loving. He got you those 10-pack skincare face masks, in which you let out a huge gasp, making him laugh. 
“Oh, we have to use this at some point!” You exclaimed happily “Like, we need to have a spa night—where we just watch movies, doing face masks, eating takeouts. Oh, that’s the dream!” You sighed happily. 
“We still have two weeks left till we go back to work, I'm sure we can find the time to do that,” Tom said with a permanent smile on his face, watching you with pure joy made him feel like he accomplished something big. 
You got him one of those Instax polaroid cameras—true, it was a bit too much for a stocking stuffer especially since the box definitely stood out against the stocking, but you figured he’ll like it. 
“Darling, this is too much but I’m thankful,” Tom commented as he took out the camera from the box. “I can’t wait to use this and keep memories using it—why don’t we start right now?! Let’s take a photo of us and our matching sweaters!”  
Tom took a lot of photos of you two, in the end. A couple of overexposed photos, one with the matching sweaters, one with your faces pressed against each other, one with your faces way too close to the camera, and one where he gave you a kiss on your cheek (he asked if that’s okay, of course, you said yes. it’s not like he hasn’t kissed you before— still no conversations about that, by the way). It was a good thing you got him at least 3 boxes of those 20 pack films in his stockings as well. 
The real kicker was Tom’s “small” stocking present for you. He got you this dainty, gold necklace with a crescent moon charm. You were pretty sure it was expensive because of the teal box it came with. 
“Stop,” You gasped “Tom, now this—this is too much.” You stressed out. “I can’t have this. Nope, you have to return this.”
Tom shrugged as if it was nothing. “You deserve it. Darling, you deserve something nice after this shitty year.” 
“Tom, I’m serious. This is too much.” 
“I’m serious too, Y/N. Keep it, please. I’d be offended if you don’t.”
After the roller coaster of emotions due to the stocking presents, you gave your parents a call to wish them a merry Christmas. They insisted to do a video call because they wanted to see Tom in the family sweater—which your mom wouldn’t stop gushing about. 
“I think your mum loves me,” Tom whispered closely in your ear. He didn't have to try too hard. With the laptop propped up on top of the coffee table, you two were sitting close together on the living room floor—knees touching, maximum close skin contact. CDC would never approve. 
“Yeah, I think it’s the accent,” You mumbled jokingly. 
Tom moved his head to take a good look at you, smiling. You could feel his eyes burning your skin. Why does he have to look at you like that? Why does he have to be this close?
The initial video call with your parents turned into a whole family reunion when you found out they set up a group call with your extended family. Imagine the dread and fear in your eyes when you heard your one aunt ask, 
“Finally, Y/N, is that your boyfriend?” 
Your eyes widened as you stuttered to say your defence, making Tom chuckle. You frowned at him and nudged him saying, “Don’t laugh, tell them no or I’ll never hear the end of it.”
“No, unfortunately, I’m not,” Tom replied, laughing. “However, I do believe we make a cute couple, don’t we?” He teased, earning an earnest yes from your mom. 
You could only wish for the floor to swallow you whole. 
As the clocks rolled to twelve, it was officially Christmas. You and Tom figured you might as well start opening gifts again because Christmas Day is going to be a drag for the two of you. 
“Okay, start with this.” You said as you handed him a gift bag. You didn’t give him a lot of gifts for the actual Christmas Day because you went all out on the stuffers. 
“Pyjamas?” He asked with a grin. You made a signal for him to give you a minute. You ran to your room and changed into pyjamas. 
“Not just pyjamas, Tom, but matching pyjamas!” You exclaimed, laughing. “I saw it and figured we should do this for my day.”
“Sick!” Tom laughed. Tom got into his pair of pyjamas as well and of course, he didn’t forget to pull out his new polaroid camera to take a photo of you two. “Shit, I forgot to film our entire Christmas Eve.” He said as he saw the camera that was still sitting on the kitchen island from earlier that morning. 
You shrugged. “I’m pretty sure you’ll win either way. Just that content from the breakfast crepes was enough to secure your place.” You said jokingly.
“All I’m hearing is that you’re going to spend Christmas with me in London next year.” Tom sang teasingly. 
“Yeah, maybe bringing you to our big Christmas holidays is a bad idea.” You wondered out loud. 
“I like your family,” Tom commented with a smile “and I think they will love having me there for the holidays.” 
“That would be a nightmare.” You mumbled to yourself. 
The rest of the night dragged on. You and Tom finished the rest of your gifts—you got him a watch, he got you a vinyl player. You two managed to watch the first Harry Potter film before you called it a night. 
You were about to head into your room when you heard Tom say, “Mistletoe.”
“Hm?” You hummed, confused. He placed a finger under your chin and gently tilted your head. There you saw a mistletoe hanging by one of the light fixtures. 
“How did that even—” 
“Can I kiss you?” Tom asked, cupping the sides of your face. 
“Hm?” Tom was definitely giving you a run for your money. How can a girl with a speech turn speechless?
“Can I kiss you?” He asked more softly. All you could do was nod. For if you even dare to open your mouth, all of this would cease to exist.  
His lips gently touched yours and then soon moulded into one. It was soft, sweet—familiar. His lips were something you never thought about—at least not a lot but you craved it. You crave his lips, his touch, him. You were riding a new high and you thanked every single god that you were sober to remember this—because this, this is something you want to cherish. 
“You told me you’re tired of being alone,” Tom whispered against your lips. “You don’t have to be anymore. Not when you have me, not ever.”
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PERMANENT TAGLIST: @quaksonhehe @dark-infernal-instruments @trustfundparker @emsma11​ @tomshufflepuff​ @spider-babe​ @goodgirlgonetom​
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theyarebothgunshot · 3 years ago
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ROSE I SWEAR TO GOD WHAT THE HELL ITS HAPPENING????? AT THIS POINT I JUST THINK THEY JUST FORGOT TO COME OUT????? THEY ARE ACTING LIKE THAT AND BEING “WAIT WHY ARE PEOPLE FREAKING OUT SO MUCH”???? OH MY LITERAL GOD HOLY CRAAAAAAAAAAP
y'all weren't kidding when you said you could feel something big was coming huh. sigh. hi! welcome to: the gang freaks out about misha's text in my inbox
instantly my first thought upon seeing misha’s text: “he sounds like that in the morning.”
they woke up together on the regular <3
GUNSHOTS WAKE UP DID YOU SEE MISHA’S TEXT??? he misses jensen so much :(((
yes :(( and me too :((
*adjusts tinhat* d-do you think misha originally took that photo to send to jensen? like a “hurry up and come in here, the pink blankey and i miss you.” ...
oh my god anon its too early for this i dont need to get emotional!!! on god i believe he texts him pics like this every day
have you seen misha's text yet??
no
girl wake up new cockles content
july is gonna be our month i can feel it!!!!!!!!
hi did anybody else get the fact that he never said that pic was while filming supernatural. like it was a little weird to not add 'in vancouver while filming [episode title]' My theory is that its a little joke because that pic is ACTUALLY in jensens apartment NOW when hes filming the boys from like a week ago. It seems like something he would do amen
oh my god i cant do 'cockles are living together rn' truthing today but you are very brave <3
ROSE ROSE ROSE ARE YOU AWAKE????? MISHA’S JENSEN TEXT!!! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK I’M SCREAMING????? HELP!!! what 👏🏽 was 👏🏽 the 👏🏽 reason 👏🏽 misha ??? he really said i miss my march 1st baby OUTLOUD without really saying it outright i- MISHA WHATS UR @ SERIOUSLY!! - 🦋 anon
misha said happy pride to my husband and our perceivers and i thank him for that <3
Rose I hope you have a very nice sleep and are not suffering throughout this major cockles event in the middle of the night. ANYWAYS I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY I CAN'T BREATHE 'SPARE ROOM' 'HIS BLANKY' SIR - anon anon
*looks into the camera* so anyways i woke up pretty much around the time you messaged me this and i am dead tired now
hehehe once again you've made the mistake of going to bed. I think imma stay up to see your reaction to the sleepover in a few hours ;) -🐢
hope i didnt dissapoint dsjhfsjfhsjhf
I’m just here to apologize that once again you were asleep when the fandom decided to start on fire <3
thank you darling i feel like i deserve some financiel compensation tbh
To all of the other anons who will undoubtedly be in gunshot's traditional freak out post with me (looking forward to all of y'alls reactions 😂), I really hope you've enjoyed this fantastic ending to pride month. Misha really chose to share that info wth us!! I haven't slept much this week because each night gets crazier. We're all thriving in this dumpster right now - 🐢
god bless we ARE all thriving!!!!
i cant deal with the Love You script dropping on the same day that misha posts both a t&s pride post and That Text. so misha is invested enough to know that the script dropped today in all likelihood. and. i. help. help. help.
🍭
yeah yeah yeah exactly nonnie exactly
my tumblr has been crazy, i haven't been able to send you asks until now 🥺 my posts are not showing in the tags...anyway tumblr staff already fix the problem with the asks so at least I can be loud in here.
crazy everything is just crazy! Misha's post, Misha's message, Goodbye Stranger script...all I'm missing is for Jensen to pull a heller!Jensen on main and i'm dead
Hope you have a beautiful day!!
-🐣
yeah tumblr fucked up and turned on my asks yesterday wtf, i hope your problem gets fixed soon!
and i hope you have the best day too!!!
we get to see misha today too i can't do this
oh god me neither
THEY WERE DOING LAUNDRY TOGETHER AFTER ALL
JDFHJSHFHSJ YEAH FUCKING HELLLL
this is just me speculating but is it a coincidence Misha is thinking about “lasts” especially the last night sleeping at Jensen’s, on the last day of pride????? *insert incredibles coincidence I think not gif*
its never a coincidence, everything this chaos machine does is on purpose
You woke up much earlier than expected! I legit thought that I had lost track of time scrolling through the madness that is the cockles tag right now. Sorry that you're going to be dragging for the rest of your day. Misha ensures that only he gets sleep when he pulls these stunts -🐢
lmao it was already light outside and i kept thinking about the misha text so i thought fuck it lets forget sleep, i need to cockles truth on main before i have to go to work <3
I’m sorry. I died. 🦚
me too!
*head in hands*, affectionate - tea anon
happy second month of pride everyone
cheers to that!!
had a thought: that one time the fan asked misha about them sharing clothes in 2018 and he joked, “it’s easy for our clothes to get mixed up, that’s all. whose is whose, you know, when you’re putting it on.” and “now everyone’s like ‘hmm, how’d the laundry get mixed up, guys?’” i hate him. i hate that it’s not implausible now. i hate.
how many times do i have to tell y'all that misha uses jokes to mask the truth <3 he was telling us the truth!
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cherryonigiri · 4 years ago
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S/O that thirsts over anime/game guys
reposted bc wasn’t showing up in the tags + I want to keep nsfw under the cut
@nononononojustno asked: Okay so could you write a headcanon where 2 random boys (can you pick then? I love all of boys from hq) and Ushi-kun where they walk on their gfs fangirling or thirsting over another anime/game character?And she was talking how hot he is? How they would react?👀😂 have a great day/night and dont forget to eat and get rest, love you💕
A/N: hahahahaha i laughed while writing this. FYI these are all based on legit crushes i had on anime/game characters at some point in my life - see if you’ve watched the shows i’ve watched :) ILY I PROMISE I’M DOING MY BEST TO EAT THREE MEALS A DAY AND GET ADEQUATE SLEEP MWAH. also i went overboard and added an extra boy bc why not. These are a little shorter since there were 4 characters but I hope you enjoy!
Content warning: implied nsfw for Atsumu + slight nsfw hcs for Matsukawa (both are under the cut)
PS: If anyone wants a spicy sequel/one shot for matsukawa i’m open to the idea 👀👀 let me know in my inbox!
Ushijima Wakatoshi
Ushijima definitely knows you’re into anime + games
Having visited your dorm room on multiple occasions he’s seen your extensive collection of manga, anime posters and you always seem to be playing on your switch whenever you have free time
Of course, he notices a significant portion of your collection is centered on male characters
And you’ve definitely mentioned a few games to him - Ikemen Sengoku, Code:Realize, Hakuouki (wow i’m really out here exposing myself) etc.
He doesn’t really mind though? Like - at the end of the day these are 2D men, whereas he is a very real boyfriend
At least he thinks he doesn’t mind
Recently, he notices that you seem to be on your phone a lot, and you seem to be texting the same group chat very often
He asks why and you laugh - it’s not actual text messages you’re just trying out a new otome/simulation game called Mystic Messenger. He finds the name silly but he just brushes it off he’s definitely J E A L O U S
Until one day he walks into your room while you’re calling one of your friends to freak out about that specific game
You sound kind of teary from outside the door “Oh MY GOD OH MY GOD I GOT THE GOOD ENDING WITH JUMIN!” and “[friend name] I THINK I CAN DIE HAPPY I’M MARRIED TO JUMIN HAN WHAT MORE DO I NEED IN LIFE” and “HE’S SO FREAKING ATTRACTIVE UGH I AM BLESSED”
He’s like who TF is Jumin and immediately bursts into your room looking pissed off
Poor babie is all like “you’re married?” and “if you had someone else you were interested in you should have told me.” “Who is this Jumin Han???” 🧐
Oh my god you start cackling, but you manage to tell him that NO you are not married and that Jumin Han is a fictional character from the game you’re playing
Ushijima looks confused after you explain - why would you find fictional men attractive when you’re already dating him?
Tendou almost dies laughing the next day when Ushijima tells him about what happened
Oikawa Tooru
Since practice finishes pretty late he usually goes to see you at your house at night, but tonight things wrapped up earlier - he’s excited to spend more time with you
You’ve finished up most of your homework so you’ve just been rewatching Attack on Titan since you’re super excited for the new season
You’re kinda distracted/have headphones on so you don’t hear your boyfriend knock on the front door. Your mom answers it and lets him in and he climbs the stairs
He can hear your fangirling (freaking out) over something as he walks towards your room
You jump in surprise when he opens the door, because you thought he would be a bit later but immediately release your pent up excitement
“Tooru just LOOK at him he’s such a bad ass like oh my gosh he literally has swords and he’s still running around slaying the MPs who have guns. God whenever he gets angry he looks so hot,” etc. etc.
You’re shoving your laptop in his face, showing him gifs and video of attack on titan, specifically the captain of the survey corps that you are obsessed with
Tooru gets it - for him its space, shitty alien films and astronomy. For you it’s video games and anime - or more specifically, handsome characters from said franchises
Even though he understand that it’s something you’re passionate about he still makes a whole show about whining how you’re in love with Levi Ackerman (lmao i still thirst over our favorite captain) instead of him
“y/n i’m taller than him! And more handsome! He has blood on him all the time! And he’s super annoying because he’s obsessed with cleaning.” *cue pouty Tooru*
You probably shouldn’t tell him that you are an avid follower of the levi x reader tag on tumblr
Tooru still somehow finds out you’re also reading reader insert fanfic and goes BERSERK with his pouting and whining - literally everyone and their mothers have heard his sob story about how “his darling y/n is leaving me for a short germaphobic asshole”
The rest of the team finds it hilarious - the end up pranking him by posting pictures of Levi in his school locker or texting them in the volleyball groupchat (Oikawa is Suffering™)
Makki and Mattsun get him a Levi keychain for his birthday and cackle when he chucks it violently into the nearest trash can
Miya Atsumu
Doesn’t really know you’re into anime/gaming at first
I don’t think that’s on purpose - Atsumu just has such a one track mind when it comes to volleyball and he’s always busy with practice
so he just kinda doesn’t really give all the anime merch in your room a second glance even though it’s a dead giveaway
I bet Atsumu secretly watches some superhero anime - probably shounen stuff like My Hero Academia, one punch man etc.
He probably starts to notice you’re into anime/games because you’ll play games on your phone/gaming device all the time
One day he notices you’re giggling + blushing while looking at your screen. He’s curious to he heads over to you when coach says they can have a break
Peeks over your shoulder because he wants to know what you’re playing - but instead he’s greeted by some 2D samurai guy called Harada Sanosuke asking you to marry him
“Huh, I didn’t know you were into this kinda stuff y/n” tries to sound playful but internally he is screaming / ?????? WOT I DIDN’T KNOW MY S/O WAS INTO OTOME GAMES
Atsumus pretty chill about it at first, he probably teases you a lot about playing the game but isn’t really bugged about it
“Maybe you should thirst over your boyfriend instead of a fictional character babe~”
I mean - he knows he’s attractive and why be jealous? You only really play the game when he’s busy and you don’t really let the game play seep into your dates/hangouts
But one time he walks in on you reading some ~spicy~ hakuouki x reader fanfic and he’s like are u serious
Like you were lowkey quiet screaming to yourself and muttering “omg omg omg” when he walked in and you definitely tried to close your laptop so he couldn’t see what was open in your browser
Too bad Atsumu has mad reflexes and manages to prevent you from making your computer go to sleep
Briefly skims whatever it was that you were reading and smirks at you
“Hey, if you really want something like this, why don’t you let your real boyfriend deliver” before kissing you
Matsukawa Issei
Look, Issei just wants a chill movie/tv show night where the two of you can bundle up on the couch and binge whatever anime you feel like
Has everything set up - this man is ready to go: snacks? he has all of your favorites, couch? filled with soft pillows + multiple pillows. Attire? Comfy sweatpants shirtless 🥵
Last time he chose the series for your binge sleepover so he let you choose what the two of you were gonna watch this time
Turns out you decided to watch Psycho-Pass - it seemed like a pretty cool show, he was down with the whole dystopia/psychological concept
Starts out pretty normal, is appreciating the action + mystery elements and is glad that you chose that show
About halfway through the anime you two decide to take a break - he goes to the kitchen to refill your snacks, leaving to stretch you back.
When he comes back with more food, he notices that you’re hunched over your phone, typing something
He sneaks up behind you after he puts the food down, “Whatcha reading there babe?” You squeak and try to hide your phone, but not before he sees the words kougami x reader typed into your tumblr search bar
Lit-rally exCuSE me what - he’s not mad (more amused than anything else) but he also kind wants to tease you (bc Mattsun is a little shit)
“Is that the reason you wanted to watch this show?” he asks playfully. “He’s pretty hot tho, I kinda agree with you there babe.”
Now that he’s released the floodgate, he can’t stop your occasional comments like “omg how does he look so GOOD when he’s punching someone” or “he could shoot me with his dominator and i’d still say thank you”
The thirst comments are kinda getting to him, so he decides to take things in a different direction
“Let me what I can show you with my dominator~” L M A O I’M SORRY THIS EXISTS
Suddenly you’re being pulled onto his lap, and pressed against his bare chest, Issei barely gives you time to adjust before he’s kissing you roughly, tongue plunging into your mouth
His hands wrap around your hips pressing your core closer to his own, and you can feel his hard-on pressing into your stomach
He’ll be sure to suck a dark hickey onto the side of your neck and his hands travel under your shirt, just to remind you who your real boyfriend is
Needless to say, you won’t remember a single thing about the second half of the show after the night is over couch sex? Couch sex 😏
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Sweet Pandemonium - Gally (The Maze Runner) Part 16 of 16
Welp, this is it I guess. I’ve never finished a story of this size before, so ngl, I’m proud of myself. This story was originally gonna be a short possibly two parter imagine, I never intended for this to be 16 chapters long lmao. AND, I didn’t do much pre planning either. I kinda just made things up as I wrote, which is why this story is such a shit show. But a big thank you to the supporters of this shit show, it means a whole fucking lot. Now, back to your regularly scheduled programming...
TW: Page 250
I keep forgetting to tag, fucking hell: @multifandom-fangirl4​  @dxllysoutsider​ @gladerscake​
~~~~~~~~~~
( not my gif )
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Shakily changing into a stolen guard’s uniform, you found yourself more nervous than you probably should’ve been. 
You just dreaded going back, now with the threat of everyone you care about dying. 
Before, when it was just you risking your life, it was easier. You didn’t really care if you died if you could save someone else, and you knew that mentality was not the healthiest. But compared to Gally, Thomas, or even Brenda, you didn’t feel like you mattered as much. 
What could you possibly have to offer that would be greater than anyone else’s contribution?
“You ready?” Gally smiled at you.
Ah, but being able to be with Gally overpowered those feelings.
“Yup. How do I look?” You teased, jokingly twirling around to show off the heavy uniform.
“Pretty damn good, I gotta say.”
You brushed off the butterflies in your stomach with a scoff. “Well, a good uniform can make anyone look good, I think.”
“I mean, sure. But damn, you really pull it off.”
Your lighthearted conversation was cut short by a sharp cough, looking over to see Newt with an annoyed look on his face. “You guys are bloody disgusting, excuse me while I go vomit.”
“Oh, come on, man. Look at her and tell me she doesn’t look nice.” Gally pointed to you.
“Jesus, keep it in your pants, mate.”
You stifled a laugh as Gally turned a light shade of red, ignoring the suggestive comment with an eye roll. “I’m just sayin’.”
Newt walked away from the amusing exchange, still stifling a few coughs. You couldn’t help but worry. “Does he seem a bit off to you?” You asked. Gally looked to Newt then back to you, the sad look on his face giving you a guarantee that something was wrong.
You would’ve prodded further if it weren’t for Thomas giving the signal that it was time to start infiltrating the W.C.K.D. building.
The way it was planned, Thomas and Teresa would walk in the front together, meeting up with Newt, soon you and Gally would find them, making sure to keep a natural distance away. Brenda’s job seemed the easiest, to you at least, all she had to do was steal a bus. You prayed that Frypan didn’t fall to his death, and that Jorge would get back in time with the Berg.
“You’re worrying.”
You rolled your eyes at Gally’s tone. “Yeah, of course I’m worrying. When do I not worry?”
“Not as much as you’d think.”
Your felt your heavy breaths waft back into your face from the helmet you were wearing not allowing much to circulate. Seriously, how could people do this all day for a job? You ignored the queasy feeling in your gut as you found Teresa with the other two “guards.”
Entering into a stairwell, Gally suddenly stopped the group. “Hold on, hold on.” He said, looking over some sort of electric box. “I can get in here.”
“Kay, throw me the walkie.” Thomas ordered, motioning for you to follow with him to clear the area.
You heard Newt cough heavily as you descended down the stairs with your gun, right behind Thomas. “How long has Newt been like this?” You whispered.
“Now’s not the time, Y/N.” Thomas said, scanning next floor to see that it was clear.
“Thomas.” You pleaded.
Thomas huffed, an annoyed yet mournful face overtaking his features. You knew his answer wouldn’t be good, and you found yourself dreading what he would say. “He’s got the Flare...he’s been like this for awhile now. I just found out myself.” He frowned.
You cast your gaze downwards, tears already welling up in your eyes as you realized what this meant. Thomas didn’t give you a chance to respond as he quickly ascended the stairs back to the others, holding up the radio. “Frypan, we’re in. How you doing?”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m getting there.” Fry voiced. “Tell Minho hi for me.”
“Hang in there, buddy.”
Gally soon got into the box, quickly looking through the various labels until finding the right one. “This’ll work.” He assured.
“Okay, Brenda, what’s your status?” Thomas spoke through the radio.
“Working on it.” She answered.
“Copy. Just make sure you’re ready on your end.”
“Don’t worry, you know I’m gonna be there.”
Gally quickly set up the hacking signal up to the correct wires, shutting the box door with a grin. “Alright, let’s go.” Everyone quickly bounded down the stairs, stopping at the door at the bottom. “Lawrence, we’re in position.” Gally radioed, only to be greeted with silence. “Lawrence?” 
“If he doesn’t turn those bloody cameras off, then we’re gonna be in big trouble.” Newt expressed everyone’s thoughts.
Gally looked nervous, but peeking though the little window in the door, he huffed. “He’ll do his part.”
You pinched the bridge of your nose, sighing heavily before readjusting the mask part of the helmet over your face. “Let’s get this over with.”
Teresa reluctantly placed her thumb over the ID scanner, and Gally quickly encouraged everyone through the door to cautiously speed through the halls to get to where Minho was being held. 
It didn’t take long to find the holding bay with Teresa leading the group, but you didn’t know if getting in would be easy with a bunch of guards inside.
“Teresa, stay back.” You ordered, gently pushing her behind you. The last thing you guys needed was for her getting in the crossfire.
“Ready?” Gally looked to everyone, they all nodded, clutching their weapons tightly.
As soon as the door opened, shots rang out from your side, making work of all the guards in no time. The element of surprise probably helped. “Huh, that was surprisingly easy.” You chuckled breathlessly, almost proud of yourself for getting some decent shots in, the recoil packed a punch though.
“Yeah? Don’t let it go to your head.” Newt sassed.  
Seeing all the kids exit their holding cells with looks of hopefulness, almost made you tear up. What could’ve these poor innocent souls had to endure by the hands of W.C.K.D. You risked a glace at your cousin, and you couldn’t tell how she felt. Did she feel joy that these kids were finally getting rescued? Or all that she saw in those kids was possible cure, dehumanizing them for the sake of her morality? 
You didn’t want to think about it anymore.
“The vault. How do I get in?” Gally’s voice caught your attention. The person he was holding a gun to simply said that he couldn’t. “Guys, this might take some time.” He voiced after looking over the heavy vault door.
You looked around and furrowed your brows when you saw one key person missing. “Where’s Minho? He’s supposed to be here.”
Thomas scowled, storming up to Teresa. “Where is he?”
Teresa quickly went to the computers, looking up his file. “Someone’s moved him up to the medical wing. Thomas, that’s on the other side of the building.”
Thomas sighed. “Okay, take me to him, right now.”
“Alright, I’m coming with you.” You and Newt both stepped up.
“No. No, you guys have to wait with Gally for the serum.”
“You can’t do this on your own.” Newt argued. “And Minho comes first, remember?”
“Just go, we’re wasting time!” Gally called out. “I’ll get the serum, we’ll meet you out back.”
Thomas nodded to Newt, but turned to you with a remorseful look on his face. “No, no, you’re not making me stay.” You expressed. “I’m part of this as much as he is.”
“Y/N, you’ve done so much for us already. I can’t ask you to do this.”
“I’m offering.”
“No, please. Stay here. We’ll be okay.”
You scowled, exhaling sharply. “Fine. Keep an eye on Newt.” You whispered, Thomas nodding then running out with Newt and Teresa. “Please, be careful.”
“They’ll be fine, just watch my six and the kids.” Gally said, starting to saw into the door.
You stood guard at the door, impatiently tapping your foot as you worried about your friends, especially Newt. You wished he had stayed with you and Gally so you could give him the serum as soon as the vault opened. You knew it wouldn’t cure him, but it would give him time, and that’s what he needed right now.
You heard Gally’s saw stop, smiling ear to ear when the vault door finally opened. You went inside to help Gally load up all the vials, the whole room glowing blue from the color of the serum. “Come on, we need to hurry.”
The room was almost empty of its contents, but staring at one of the only vials left, you debated. Emotion overtook logic as you grabbed a singular vial of the serum, gathering courage and turning around, only to be stopped by Gally. “Where do you think you’re going?”
“I have to find Newt.”
Gally looked at the serum clutched tight in your hand, putting the pieces together quickly. “No, no way.”
“Who know how much time he had left? This can help him.”
“It’s too dangerous.” He said slowly.
“I can’t do nothing while I know I can help him.”
“You’re not doing nothing. You’re gonna help these kids get to Brenda. I’m not letting you.”
“I wasn’t asking.” You said bluntly, a determined look in your eyes that made Gally speechless. He had seen that look before, and he finally realized he wouldn’t be able to convince you to stay with him.
Gally quickly pulled you into a hug with his free arm, placing a rough kiss to the top of your head. “You better come back to me.”
You smiled softly. “I will.” 
And with that, you took off without a glance behind you, determined to save your friend from a terrible fate. Of course, if you had glanced behind you to see Gally’s face, you probably wouldn’t been complied to stay. But you had to help Newt, he couldn’t become one of those things. You couldn’t save Gally all those months ago, couldn’t save Jeff...or Chuck. You didn’t want history to repeat itself.
You followed the signs that led you toward where the medical bay would be, making sure to avoid being sighted at all costs. You felt silly hiding in small confined places that made your legs cramp up and wish you had more flexibility or stamina at least. It definitely didn’t help that alarms were blaring all around you, making you believe you actually did get caught. But hearing a few guards talk loudly about how intruders were heading to the medical bay, you realized it was just Thomas who must’ve fucked up, or worse Teresa.
This was going to get a lot harder...
All the guards seemed to rally to the medical bay to capture Thomas and Newt, it wasn’t too difficult to blend in with everyone else distracted from the chaos of it all.
You heard gunshots and glass smashing down the halls of the medical wing. Those boys sure were making it obvious, weren’t they?
You clutched you gun to your chest, not feeling very confident about taking on the guards by yourself, but when you saw your friends with a newly escaped Minho struggling to avoid the guards, you knew you had to do something.
You saying a silent prayer, even though you didn’t know if there was any being out there that heard it, gave you some sort of comfort enough to charge the guards that were gaining on your friends. Shooting at will, not even sure you were hitting any guards, you heard a few men fall to the floor with pained groans.
You didn’t have time to be proud of yourself before you felt a sharp pain in the back of your head, immediately falling to the floor yourself with a yelp.
You looked up to see the annoyed face of Jensen, him leaning down and roughly grabbing onto you and hoisting you up to stand. “You’re a real pain the arse, aren’t you, youngblood?”
Teresa jumped when she heard the doors slam opened, gasping when she saw you on the floor with a bloodied face in front of Jensen. “What the hell, Jensen?”
“Look who I found at the med wing, taking out guards left and right.” Jensen sneered.
“I said alive, Jensen!” Teresa fumed, looking at your almost unconscious form.
“I know what you said, Teresa. She’s breathing, isn’t she?”
Teresa scowled at the man before leaning down to delicately lift you to your feet, ungracefully dragging you to a gurney from the lack of help with your dead weight. “Get out. Thomas is still out there.”
“Your wish is my command, my lady.” Jensen bowed sarcastically, turning on his heel to walk out of the room.
Teresa turned her attention back to you. “I’m so sorry, Y/N.” She whispered, quickly fixing up a wet cloth to wipe away at the blood leaking from your nose and mouth.
You groaned at the pained pressure of the cloth, weakly pushing Teresa’s hand away from your face. “Hurts...” You mumbled.
“I thought you were supposed to stay with Gally.” Teresa fussed, ignoring your discomfort to clean your face. “You shouldn’t have come here.”
“I needed to help Newt...” You frowned, holding up the serum that was once safely in your pocket.
Teresa sighed sadly. “It wouldn’t have saved him.”
“But it would’ve given him time.”
Teresa stayed silent for a moment, deciding what to do with you. You furrowed your brows when you felt her strap you to the gurney tightly. “What’re you...?”
“I can’t have you wondering off, plus, you might have a concussion.” Teresa said, inserting a needle into your arm, pulling blood from your veins.
“You need my blood to keep me from wondering off?” You glared. Teresa avoiding your eyes as she readied another needle. “You’re still looking for a cure...even though there is none.”
“I’m just going to run some tests.” She answered simply.
You bit your lip when you felt tears well up in your eyes, gently banging your head down onto the gurney in frustration. How the hell were you gonna escape now?
Gally could’ve sworn his heart almost stopped when he saw his friends jump out of that window. Did these guys have a death wish? But what scared him even more if that there were only three, not four. Please, tell me she made it... “Where’s Y/N?” Gally tried not to shout.
Thomas eyes widened. “What do you mean? We left her with you!”
“She went to find you guys, to give that shank the serum.” Gally pointed to Newt.
Thomas clenched his fists, feeling anger well up in his gut. “Teresa wouldn’t let her get hurt. If anything, she needs her. We’ll get her back, Gally.”
“I know, cause I’m not leaving without her.”
It felt like hours before you talked to Teresa again, her being so fixated on her tests tubes and microscopes. “Any luck in finding your make believe cure?” You teased mockingly. Teresa stayed silent, watching through her scientific equipment for any sign that her cousin blood did anything to get rid of the Flare virus. Teresa slammed her hands on the table when the blood wasn’t doing anything out of the ordinary. “Guess I’m not the one, huh?”
Teresa glared at you, not appreciating your irritating commentary. She chose to move on to Thomas’ blood that she took back in the church, and her eyes widened when she saw his blood destroying the Flare virus.
Just when she finished making the first serum that she knew would work, the whole building shook as a boom echoed around the whole city.
You strained your neck to look behind you, seeing an almost mushroom cloud of fire at the wall that protected the city. “What the hell...?” Your eyes widened even more when you could faintly see a swarm of people charging through the gap in the wall, quickly realizing that the people were fighting and destroying everything. “Teresa, we have to get out of here.” You said, noticing everyone outside the lab room where thinking the same thing and trying to making a quick escape.
Teresa frowned, storming over to you and removing your restraints, and quickly going back to her experiments. “I can’t.”
You quickly removed yourself from the gurney. “What do you mean? The city’s getting raided. They’ll burn this place down, with us in it.”
“Thomas is the cure, Y/N!” She yelled, making you speechless. “His blood is destroying the virus! He can save us all. I need him.”
“Teresa...if all went as planned, he’s long gone by now.”
“No, he can’t be. Newt is dying and Thomas won’t abandon him, you know that. He’ll be slowing them down. I have to get through to him.” Teresa exhaled shakily. “You can go if you want, I’m staying. I have to.”
You looked to the exit then back to Teresa, your cousin, your only family. In the past, most choices you made were clearly the right ones. But now...you had no idea what to do.
You wanted to choose Teresa...you really did. But you still had the temporary serum, you still had the chance to help Newt. “I’m sorry, Teresa.” You voiced, gaining her attention. “I want to stay with you. But I need to find our friends.”
Teresa’s face fell, frowning. “I understand.”
“I’ll come back for you.” Your voice wavered, feeling intense emotion wash over you, suddenly getting the feeling to tell her you loved her. But you cut the goodbye short, running out of the room and rushed to leave the building.
Thankfully, everyone was so focused on packing up to leave, you had no trouble escaping. But you almost didn’t want to leave the building when you saw the hell on earth that was just outside. But you pushed on, making sure you kept the hold on the vial safely in your hand.
You almost jumped when you heard your cousin’s voice echo around the city’s speakers.
“Thomas? Can you hear me? I need you to listen to me. I know you have no reason to trust me, but I need you to come back. Thomas, you can save Newt. There’s still time for him. There’s a reason Brenda isn’t sick anymore. It’s your blood, do you understand? She isn’t sick because...you cured her. She doesn’t have to be the only one. You just need to come back, and this will all finally be over. Please, just come back to me. I know you’ll-”
The speakers suddenly cut out, as almost all power in the city was down.
You suddenly felt dread wash over you, you had to find Thomas.
Running through the city as fast as you could, you wished you were a Runner, then maybe your legs wouldn’t cramp up every time you exerted yourself. You felt the heat of fires and explosions as you sprinted, dodging multiple guards and people fighting each other. This wasn’t supposed to happen...
Finally getting to a clearing, you stopped to cease the wheezing in your heavy breaths, until you heard screaming. You quickly rounded the corner to see Thomas and Newt...fighting each other.
No...you were too late...
You ran to them, quickly trying to pull Newt off of Thomas, only for his attention to turn to you and tackle you to the ground. “Newt!” You yelled, tearing up quickly at the sight of his dead eyes and Flared up face. “Newt...”
Thomas pushed Newt off of you, giving you the chance to take the vial out of your pocket, but the new Crank got free of Thomas’ hold and attacked you again, the vial violently being thrown from your hand. You internally cringed when you heard a shatter. Fuck...
You felt your vision get blurry when Newt smashed your head against the pavement, the pain resonating throughout your skull and making you feel lightheaded.
You didn’t know what happened after that, you just woke up and Newt wasn’t attacking you anymore. You didn’t hear the sound of struggle anymore. You looked to your left to see Brenda, a look of pained shock on her face. Then you realized, Thomas was sitting next to Newt. 
“No...” You whispered.
You crawled over to Thomas, looking down at Newt’s body. You could barely see anything due to the tears that welled up in your eyes, making the world around you blurry. You couldn’t do anything but stare numbly at your fallen friend, unaware that Thomas had left.
“Y/N.”
You knew that voice belonged to Gally, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. Or do anything when Frypan wrapped his arms around you to give you some sort of comfort, him feeling the same grief as you, if not worse.
Gally felt the pain of the loss too, but seeing everything being burned down too quickly, he had to speak up. “This place is gonna take us down with it if we don’t get outta here...”
Fry gently pulled you away from Newt’s body, reluctantly motioning for Minho to follow. “Come on.” Fry rubbed your shoulder.
You were basically on autopilot on the way to the Berg, where Jorge, Vince, and the kids were waiting to take off. “We have to find Thomas. He went back to the holding facility.” Brenda voiced worryingly.
“That damn kid.” Vince huffed.
The numbness went away enough to remember that you told Teresa that you’d be back for her. You had to find her again, but the Berg was already being lifted up into the air. In your heart, you knew wherever Thomas was, Teresa was most likely with him. That’s something you could rely on, at least.
“Hey...” Gally sat next to you, gently holding your hand. You could faintly see tear marks down his face, his eyes a shade of red and watery. “We’ll find them.”
You wished you believed that, but after everything that’s happened, you felt having hope was childish. You couldn’t bear to hope just for things to end terribly.
“I think I got him!” You heard Jorge shout, everyone, including you, rallying to the front to look out the Berg’s window.
“Yeah, that’s him. I got the hatch.” Brenda said, quickly springing into action.
“Alright, I got him. I got him.” Jorge said, proceeding to carefully turn the Berg around so the now open hatch was facing the burning building roof. “I can’t get any closer!”
Everyone crowded the hatch, calling out for Thomas and Teresa on the roof, reaching out their hands to grab them. Quickly noticing that he was injured badly, you started to reach out as well. “Thomas! Teresa! Come on!”
“Get closer!” Teresa called out.
“Jump!” Vince yelled, his body almost half out of the aircraft trying to reach.
“We gotta get closer!” Gally yelled to Jorge.
“Come on, reach!”
The Berg finally got close enough to where Teresa could help Thomas onto the hatch, everyone quickly pulling him inside. You looked back to Teresa, holding out your hand as far as you could. “Your turn, jump!” You called out. You furrowed your brows in confusion when Teresa made no effort to move, not even to reach out for you. You could see the debate in her eyes, wondering if she actually deserved to live or not. “Don’t leave me!”
Teresa’s eyes softened, almost bringing her to tears upon hearing that short but impactful sentence. In a matter of a few seconds, the next building over was destroyed, large chunks of debris falling, making the roof collapse into itself, taking your cousin with it.
“No!” You sobbed loudly, ripping apart your vocal cords and feeling your heart break in two.
The Berg quickly left the destroyed area, bringing you all back to their base to pack up and finally go to a place called the “Safe Haven.”
You fell back, feeling grief and guilt weigh you down. I shouldn’t have left her...she would be here if I had just stayed...
You looked to see that Thomas passed out, but he was alive. Brenda and Gally quickly patched him up, but he would have to be better treated when the Berg arrived.
Gally just sat next to you the whole ride, not saying anything, not even attempting to give you comforting touches in fear that it would just make things worse, he just sat there to let you know he was there for you.
Everything felt like it was moving too fast, like time sped up without warning or giving you time to adjust. It made you feel nauseous, but you had nothing in your stomach to throw up, besides bile, you which you did upchuck. You huffed at the burning feeling in your throat. “Damn it...”
Gally was right by your side, rubbing your back and telling you everything would be okay. But it wouldn’t be okay. You lost your close friend, and then you lost your only family that you had left. You couldn’t help the new flow of tears, Gally quickly pulling you close to lean on his chest. “It’s okay. Let it out...” He said softly.
“I could’ve...I could’ve...” You hiccupped.
“There’s nothing you could’ve done, sweetheart.” Gally hugged you tighter, feeling your body rack with heavy cries.
Hours later, you finally calmed down, the tears ran out a long time ago. But you noticed the machine hum of the Berg stopped. “We’re here!” Jorge called out, making you flinch at the sudden shout. 
“Come on, help me get Thomas situated.” Vince called out, gathering the group to carry him, including Gally.
You stepped out of the Berg to immediately smell a slight salty scent, you never smelled anything like it. And you heard an unfamiliar sound, almost like white noise. It was just after sunset, but it was still a little light out. But you instantly recognized the light tan sandy ground, the water the stretched out for miles and miles to the horizon.
You’d never seen a beach before, not even before your memory wipe before the Maze. It was beautiful, but you would appreciate it better without the rotting feeling of grief weighing on your shoulders.
You walked to where you saw Vince take Thomas, stopping right outside the entrance of the wooden hut. “Is he okay?” You asked softly.
“He’ll be okay.” Vince answered. “He should wake up soon, but I have to go and make sure things have been taken care of while I’ve been gone.” And with that, Vince walked away with a fast pace.
Minho then exited the hut, meeting you with wide eyes. “Hey...” He said awkwardly, making you give a tight lipped smile. “I’m...sorry, about Teresa. I know how important she was to you.”
You didn’t want to cry anymore, you were sick of crying and the thought alone made you exhausted. “I’m sorry about Newt. He...he was a good guy.”
Minho’s lip quivered slightly, but quickly covered it up with a sigh. “We all lost him.”
You brought him into a hug, not knowing what else to do. It was weird at first, you two weren’t the type to show physical affection to each other, but you felt the situation called for it. Minho hugged you back tightly, trying not to cry at the thought of never being able to hug his best friend again.
“Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m tired.” You sighed.
“Yeah, I think everyone is. It would be weird if they weren’t.” Minho looked past you and smiled to himself weakly. “I think I should get some sleep. I’ll see you later.” You turned to watch Minho walk off, giving Gally a slight nod as he passed him.
Gally walked up to you with a small smile. “I would ask if you’re okay, but I feel like that question is pretty obvious.”
“Yeah...” You whispered. “I’m just fucking exhausted.”
Gally frowned, placing a hand on your shoulder. “Vince already has some beds set up for us. Shall we go?”
You nodded. “That sounds nice.”
You and Gally set up your beds next to each other, at your insistent request. To be fair, in a new environment, you didn’t feel safe at all. Ironic in the “Safe Haven.”
You didn’t get a lot of sleep, constantly worrying about how Thomas was doing. Gally seemed to sense your worry. “He’ll be fine. He’s a stubborn kid.” He said, bringing you closer to him. It did seem to relax you as you fell asleep soon after, but that didn’t stop the influx of nightmares to plague your subconscious. 
The next morning, everyone was up and atom, but you and your friends seemed to have been allowed to sleep in. “Who knew waking up beside you would be so nice?” You opened your eyes to see Gally smiling softly at you. You tried not to blush, temporarily forgetting the events that happened last night.
“You guys are disgusting.” Fry suddenly voiced loudly.
“You jealous, Fry?”
“Are you kidding? Of course I am.”
You chuckled weakly at the interaction, but you sat up and stretched, looking around to see the beach lit up in its full glory. “Wow...” You whispered.
Waking up to such a beautiful sight, it did bring a small smile to your face. You wished so badly that Newt and Teresa were there to share it with everyone too, but you tried to shake those thoughts away.
Later that day, you sat beside Minho and Jorge, watching Gally help build something from afar. “He’s lucky to have you.” Minho smirked, picking at the fruit in his hand.
You smiled slightly, not truly believing it. “It’s the other way around really.”
“Well, whatever. You two are good for each other.” Minho rolled his eyes, making you chuckle. “Thomas...” You heard Minho suddenly whisper, and you looked in the same direction he was, seeing that Thomas was indeed walking through the new area.
You and Minho quickly stood up, slowly walking towards Thomas, along with everyone else behind you guys. Thomas’ eyes were tired, just like the rest of yours probably were. He didn’t smile, you couldn’t blame him. There was nothing to say, so Minho brought Thomas into a hug. You were in so much pain from the loss of your cousin, but Thomas was in love with her, you couldn’t imagine how he felt. He lost two of the most important people to him.
You hugged Thomas too, silently communicating each other’s condolences through the gesture.
That night, you and Gally sat next to each other as everyone else gathered to hear Vince speak at the bonfire that was set up, a celebration of sorts of surviving.
“We have come a long way together.” Vince started. “So many have sacrificed so much to make this place possible. Your friends, and your family. So here's to the ones who couldn't be here, here's to the friends we lost. This place is for you. It's for all of us, but this,” He held up a knife, pointing it to the large stone pillar in front of the crowd, “this is for them. So in your own time, in your own way, come make your peace. And welcome to the Safe Haven!” He cheered, the crowd following suit.
You forced yourself to smile as you held up the drink in your hand, following along with the rest of the crowd that were actually happy to be there. You were too, but it was hard to convey those feelings. Celebrating didn’t feel right, not this soon anyway.
You watched as multiple people lined up to carve their fallen friend’s or family’s names onto the pillar. You knew who’s name Minho would carve, it was obvious. But you didn’t expect Gally to get up and carve a name. Of course you were curious, but it seemed like it would be personal.
You had a name in mind, but you looked over to Thomas who was frowning while reading something. You knew Teresa meant something to him too, they were close, almost as close you and her had been when you were kids. But you two were kids, you two grew apart. You didn’t know her in the end, not truly. You knew you didn’t deserve to be the one to carve her name. You would let Thomas be the one.
You thought back to your past, having more names pop up in your head, only one truly sticking out.
You stood up after the crowd cleared, walking to the stone pillar with the knife in hand. You found the place for the name, thankful that the light from the fire still reached. You held up the knife and started carving the name.
You smiled fondly when it was done.
“Who’s that?” Gally walked up behind you, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.
You took a deep breath. “My baby sister...”
“You had a sister?”
“Yeah, my parents wanted me to choose the name, but she got the Flare along with them before I could give her one. It was only a week later that I finally gave her a name...even if she was dead.”
“How old was she?”
You frowned. “...three days old.”
“Y/N...I’m so sorry.”
You turned around to see Gally’s solemn face, but you smiled weakly. “I just have to believe she would’ve been better off, or in a better place.”
Gally only nodded, taking his hands in yours and leading you away to walk along the shore. “Things will be better here.”
“You really think so?” You asked, not sounding very hopeful.
“It have to be. We fought so hard for this.”
“I hope your right, Gally. What’ll life be like here though?” You wondered aloud.
Gally suddenly smiled giddily. “We’ll build our own city.” He nodded confidently, making you scoff.
“Oh really?” You raised your eyebrows skeptically, but a smile playing at the corner of your lips.
“Yeah! And we’ll have parties and bonfires every night.”
You couldn’t help but laugh loudly. “Easy there, tiger. We’ve only been here one day. Don’t get ahead of yourself.”
“Come on, dare to dream, Y/N.” He grinned.
“I’ll leave the dreaming up to you, Captain.”
You and Gally stopped and sat on a little incline of the shore to take a break from walking, just watching the sun come up. 
Gally was sitting behind you, his arms wrapped around your shoulders and you leaning into him comfortably. You basked in his body heat, shielding you from the slightly chilly air from the ocean tides. It felt nice, the nicest feeling you’ve felt in the past few days.
You looked up to see Gally’s eyes entranced in watching the waves, his lips naturally upturned in a slight smile.
You leaned up and placed a soft kiss to the underside of his jaw, seeing his eyes briefly close at the feeling and his smile growing into a shy grin. He turned his head and leaned down to place a kiss to your lips. “I love you, you know.”
You grinned. “Yeah, I know. I love you too...so much.”
Looking back to the ocean, you knew you guys were going to be okay now.
~~~~~~~~~~
Welp, yeah...I’m having trouble liking the ending, but I hope y’all do at least. BUT SIKE, this ain’t the end(technically). I’m planning on releasing a bonus chapter reallll soon, for all those heathens that wanted smut ;)
But for those not into that sorta thing, don’t worry! It’s not gonna forward the plot in any way, this chapter is the end of the main story, so you won’t miss anything. Just fluff and smut
108 notes · View notes
cafeinthemoon · 4 years ago
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The Founders with s/o who's a civilian and has talent to people maneuvering 🗨
This was requested by @kaiseaya​ (thanks for it, dear 💜) and I found it very interesting to try and imagine how it would be for the Founders to have a s/o who, as a civilian, doesn’t have blatant, impressive power as them (shinobi), but has their ways to convince people of their views and make them collaborate: they are versed on the laws, bureaucracy, diplomacy and takes the advantage of social conventions to achieve their goals.
Not all warriors are ninjas, right? 😉
Fandom: Naruto | Founders
Symbols: 💗 | ◻ | ▶
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Hashirama
He met you at a diplomatic meeting
Tobirama said that they attended it alongside the most capable representatives available, and you were one of them
At first he thought that meeting was going to be as boring as the many others in which he participated since he became the Hokage, so he didn’t think much about the people chosen by his brother. You know, he hated to deal with this things so he trusted Tobirama as he wouldn’t trust himself
Things were like this until it came your time to speak. Once he saw you in action, he became interested in you
He spent the whole meeting observing and thinking about you and your talents. Your speech, your intelligence and your knowledge could only be compared to the ones of few people he knew, including his brother
However, you had something nor he or anyone else had: the sensibility you used to put in your work. He noticed you had a deep understanding of the human emotions and behavior, and used this as an advantage besides your argumentation
In other people this trait of yours could be considered some sort of manipulation, but you were not this kind of person, and that was exactly what gathered Hashirama’s attention. You were never pretentious or disrespectful, and when things started to get tense you promptly acted to calm everyone’s moods. You used your power as a way to connect people, to intermediate communication between them and thus to bring peace 💜
It was something that he himself always tried to do, but his preference to use his heart to guide his actions instead of logic and technical knowledge took the best of him and he always ended up depending on his brother’s rationality. You, on the other hand, combined the best of the two sides
Someone who achieved the perfect balance between their heart and their brain – that’s the type of person Hashirama wanted by his side. And he told you that when you met in the evening of that day
Today, he’s glad he has you with him 💕
Among the Founders, he is the one who’s less concerned about the fact that you are not a ninja. You do your work as no one else could, so why should he worry?
It’s true that when you and his brother are there to work with him, he might feel a bit intimidated by your competence, but he loves to have you all together. You three are like a team 🤝
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Tobirama
Working besides Hashirama and being a master of maneuvering himself, it was only natural that sooner or later, Tobirama’s path would cross yours
He had a talent for organizing tasks and delegate them to the people with the right skills to accomplish them, whether they were shinobi or not. He simply knew everyone’s place in the schemes
And this is how he met you
Some of his partners talked to him about you when a complex mission was assigned to them, and he immediately demanded your presence
He explained what you had to do and gave you the proper tools for the work, or at least the tools he thought to be the right ones, because once you’ve read the papers and analyzed the situation, you pointed out some fragile spots that needed to be revised and asked for some time to do it
Your observations caught him off guard. How could he just miss important stuff like that? Was he becoming blind?! He asked the papers back and revised the whole pile lmao
In the end you were right, and he gave you the time you needed 😜
Time passed and episodes like this happened from time to time. Tobirama never brought them to the table, but he couldn’t deny that they bothered him a bit. You know, man is proud of his own capacities, so having someone who “challenges” him without even noticing had its impact
Besides, it didn’t go unnoticed by him that you didn’t depend solely on your intellectual and technical skills to achieve your goals: you had the ability of putting some “human” touch in everything you did, specially when your work involved direct communication with groups of people. You never imposed yourself or tried to force things out of them. You just knew where and how to press, and then you had everyone at your feet
One day, when you were talking about work and such, he made a comment on how you manage to have the idealism of his brother but not his empty head without letting it blind your judgment and always prioritize facts and logic when making your decisions. You, on your turn, said that this wasn’t a big deal and that you were actually learning so much working by his side that it was good to have his acknowledgment
This conversation basically stated the beginning of your relationship ❤
Today, Tobirama says that working with you is one of his fav things in life, but let's be honest, he can get a bit jealous of you sometimes lol
This leads him to be more stubborn than he naturally is, and he starts discussing about minor things and questioning your decisions without a good reason. You’ve already had some serious arguments bc of that (Tobi for god’s sake just chill)
However, as you use to do at work, you always solve your problems with patience and open communication
He even admits that such things are hard to accomplish specially for a shinobi, a kind of person who is used to conflict above all
In the end, he's more than happy to have someone like you by his side 🥰
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Madara
In this gif he’s probably wondering if you’re really a civilian or if your talent is actually some sort of secret genjutsu
You met at an encounter with representatives of other nations. Tobirama couldn’t attend the meeting, so his brother chose you to go in his place, but you weren’t alone in this: as one of Konoha’s Founders, Madara Uchiha was included among the representatives of the village
Because of your work, you and Madara were familiar to each other, but you never had a proper conversation or anything of this kind. Still, you’ve heard things about him here and there, and decided it’d be better to keep him out of your way
That’s why you weren’t exactly pleased when Hashirama came to tell you that this man was joining the group. It was when you were introduced to each other
You were formal and polite in your greetings and everything was fine, but then Hashirama stated that you were going to mediate the negotiations, since you were replacing Tobirama
The look Madara gave to you was enough for you to see he was not satisfied with this arrangement
He didn’t say a word against the Hokage’s decision, that’s true, but he didn’t miss the chance to point out that you seemed too young for such role and because of this, there was a possibility of the other nations not treat Konoha’s group with the respect they deserved
Too young = an inexperienced girl who’s not a shinobi occupying a position as the leader of negotiations with international diplomats. And yes, he suggested it right in your face he has no shame lmao
Your first instinct was to give him a harsh reply, but once you looked at him, you saw it wasn’t worthy, so you just told him to wait until the meeting’s beginning
“Maybe it is better to give them the benefit of doubt, at least for now. We do not know them yet, but once we do, we will know the best way to deal with them. We know our goals here and we will work to reach them, whether they appreciate us or not” 👊
Hashirama, who was hearing all of this, blushed (as he always does in this kind of situation), but the Uchiha just smiled and said he didn’t want to offend you and that “if the Hokage trusts you for this task, I am with him”
As expected when you are involved, the meeting was a success. Your knowledge of bureaucratic matters and ability to observe combined with your understanding of human behavior were enough to grant your village one more victory. Hashirama wasn’t even worried that his brother was not there
But that didn’t mean the end of Madara’s mistrust of your talents: if he didn’t want to acknowledge your capacities during the meeting, now he purposely refused to give you the credit you deserved, stating that circumstances worked at your favor and etc.
Yep, unfair, irritating and immature, but you know, this man the personification of stubbornness. He has a hard time seeing other people's value, specially if they’re not shinobi, so it wouldn’t be different with you, right?
It was only when you made it clear that you didn’t crave for his approval that he stopped denying what it was obvious and recognized that you deserved respect for your hard work
Yeah it never crossed his mind that someone could simply ignore his opinion but thank goodness you were good at brat handling
But it was the first step for you both get close to each other 😏
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moral-turpitudes · 4 years ago
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Hi can I request a TommyxReader one shot with 11. “If I’m not your first choice, then I won’t be a choice at all.”
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Mistakes:
Trigger Warning: ANGST, Fluff at the end bc that gif broke me lmao.
Word Count: 1,572
Characters: Thomas Shelby x Reader 
Requested by: Anon
Summary: Y/n walked in on Thomas kissing the new member of Shelby Co. Ltd. making her assume the worst, but nothing is ever as it seems.
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Thomas watched as Y/n ran out of the betting shop, tears streaming down her face as the chill of the winter air whirled around her, stinging her skin as she headed to the Garrison despite it being early in the morning. The bartender recognized her as Tommy Shelby’s girl and immediately poured her whatever she liked despite the emotional state she was currently in. He knew better than to talk to her now and so he left her with the bottle and went to clean the dirty tables. It was empty apart from a couple of the local drunks who might as well live there on a daily basis. 
Back at the shop Tommy stood frozen in the privacy of his office as his eyes welled up with tears. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he walked towards his desk, immediately grabbing the phone. 
“Poll. I know you’re not in today, but I need ya.” He said, his voice cracking at the end. He heard her hang up and so he waited for her arrival. He racked over the last hour in his mind, mixed emotions of anger, fear, and sadness taking hold of him. In one quick movement he threw a glass at the wall, watching it shatter as he drank straight from the bottle in his hand. His mind pulling him in a thousand directions. He should never have done what he did, and he knows that it would take a miracle for Y/n to take him back, but he was sure the two of you were done.
Polly came in as Tommy wiped his tears away, staring blankly at the glass on the ground. 
“What did you do?” Polly asked in a monotonous voice, clearly tired of cleaning up after her nephews mistakes. 
“I lost her Poll. I lost the only woman I’ve truly loved because of one damn mistake.” He said closing his eyes as he took a swig from the bottle of whiskey. 
“You cheated didn’t you...” Polly asked, taking a seat in one of his armchairs. 
“She may as well think I did. You know the woman we hired a couple weeks ago? The one from London?” He asked going over to his desk and placing the bottle down. 
“Oh that mess? Why did we hire her for? She can’t type as good as Lizzie and she can’t keep up with the bets.” She said lighting a cigarette. 
“Well, last night she came to my office abruptly. I was here late taking care of paper work while Y/n was helping with the rest down the hall. But that woman came right in, no knocking or anything and started talking about how I needed to go out and find a good woman. Find a better woman...better than Y/n, and I could tell she’d been drinking. But I didn’t expect her to make a move on me Poll. She waltzed right in and kissed me. She knew Y/n was here but she did it anyway...” He said looking at Polly, his ocean eyes pleading for help.
“And she saw you both right? Did you kiss her back” Polly asked, tapping her cigarette on the ashtray. 
“Yes she saw us. Poll you should’ve seen her face...she was broken. I tried to talk it over this morning when she got in the office. Tried to tell her I never kissed back, but it was no use. I tried to tell her what happened and that she walked in at the wrong time, but it was too late. I lost her as soon as that door opened.” He said.
Polly sighed as she watched her nephew sulking and got up and walked over to him.
“What you’re going to do is you’re going to find her and you’re going to apologize. Get straight to the truth and then let her be. She may not take you back but just know that our new employee won’t be working for us anymore. I’m going to write up a report and she’ll be leaving Shelby Company Limited today.” She said, shooing him away from his desk. He silently grabbed his coat and walked out following the dark streets to the Garrison to see if she was there. 
As he opened the door his heart dropped as he saw her crying next to an almost empty bottle of gin. Her makeup running down her face as she rested her head on her arm not noticing his presence until he sat next to her.
“I came here to talk Y/n.” He said quietly, the bartender taking away her bottle when Tommy nodded towards it. 
“I came here to drink.” She said slowly sitting up, her eyes narrowing as she realized the bottle was gone. 
“Oi! Give that back!” She hollered at the bartender, but Tommy shook his head at him and put his hand on her shoulder. She grabbed his hand and pushed it off, folding her arms over her chest in defeat.
“I’m not interested...in talking to you Thomas.” She said slurring slightly.
“I know, but I at least wanted to apologize and to get the truth out there aye?” He said, looking at her as she blinked back tears. 
“I saw you Thomas. I saw you and the new girl.” She said wiping her tears.
“That’s what you don’t understand Y/n, please hear me out.” He pleaded.
“Thomas...If I’m not your first choice, then I won’t be a choice at all.” She said before leaving the bar and going over to the coat rack. 
Tommy walked quickly over to her and put a hand on her shoulder, stopping her from putting on her coat. 
“Please hear me out.” He said. Y/n sighed and looked at him with tired eyes and nodded, sitting down at a nearby table and chairs. 
“What you saw was a mistake. I made the mistake of letting her in my office. I didn’t know why she was there but she started spouting crap about ya. Saying how I deserved a better woman, better than you. And I told her to leave but she didn’t. Y/n what you saw was her making a move on me and I’m so, so sorry you saw that and if I could take those 5 minutes back I would. She kissed me and I didn’t kiss back, I promise you that. Look...I’m not expecting you to forgive me, but I just wanted you to know what happened before you opened that door. I wanted you to know that she’ll no longer be working with us anymore either. Polly is firing her today for it.” He said. 
Y/n sat back in her chair, slowly taking in the information. She only saw them kissing, nothing else, but it still hurt her nonetheless because she loved him, more than anything in the world.
“I don’t know if I can trust you again Thomas. I mean it.” She said looking at him.
He sighed and held her hand. “Y/n you were my first choice, you always have been. I love you and I swear on my grave that something like that won’t ever happen again.” He said, his voice stern but soft.
She held back tears as she wrestled with her emotions, the gin wearing off slowly.
“I love you too, but Tommy I swear to god if you mess this up the second time around then that’ll be the last you see of me.” She said, getting up and grabbing her coat.
“I know.” He said helping her put it on. 
“So can we try this again?” He asked.
“Yes. Now c’mon. We have work to do.” She said walking slightly wobbly to the door.
“I may have work to do, but you don’t. I’ll give you the day off and Polly will take you home. You deserve some rest.” He said, his hand wrapping supportively around her waist as they walked towards the shop. 
“Alright, but no funny business. I’m serious.” She said.
“No funny business. Now c’mon lets get you home.” He said helping her inside.
Later that evening Tommy came home early, wrestling around with the small box in his pocket. He looked at his girlfriend sleeping peacefully on the bed, her makeup off and her hair slightly disheveled. He planted kisses on her forehead and one on her lips until she woke up. She smiled slightly, holding her head after waking from her alcohol induced slumber, wondering why he was home.
“What are you doing here? You don’t get back until 9 usually. It’s only 5.” She said sitting up.
“I finished some work with the lads and then I got to thinking...” He said kneeling by the bed. 
“Thinking about what?” She asked.
“I got to thinking about how I’ve never been so in love with before with anyone...and everyone in the shop can see that. And I’ve never been so upset in my life as I was when you walked out last night and earlier today. I thought I’d lost ya. I’ve never loved someone as much as you Y/n. And i want to prove to you that I do and that I’d never let something so foolish happen again.” He said, taking the small velvet box out of his hand, revealing an intricately carved gold engagement ring with a diamond on top.
Y/n’s eye welled up with tears for what felt like the thousandth time that day, but this time they were happy ones. She thought about what happened and how truly sorry he was. And so after a moment of thinking through her options, she nodded, bringing him in for a kiss and watched as he slipped the ring on her finger, the diamond sparkling as the golden sun set amongst the room. 
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