#aswiftsunrise

[oldcoyote]

for the music asks! 7, 9, 11, 18 :)

7: A song to drive to

Little Bit of Love - Tom Grennan

9: A song that makes you happy

Smeraldo Garden Marching Band (Feat. Loco) - Jimin

11: A song that you never get tired of

Run Away to Mars - TALK

18: A song from the year that you were born

Love is a Battlefield - Pat Benetar

(original meme for anybody who wants to ask/do it themselves!)

[kimabutch]

I went for a run today using your CR workout playlist, and it was brilliant!! Thank you so much for putting it together :)

Oh that’s great to hear!! You’re very welcome :D

[faraway-wanderer]

u know when u have some friends who just make you feel so instantly loved and comfortable and understood 🥰🥰🥰🥰

[dungeonsandyubi]

JUST GOT TICKETS TO HAMILTON IN LONDON THIS DECEMBER HOLY SHIIIIIIIIT HOLY FUCK THANK YOU TO @aswiftsunrise FOR GETTING THEM AUUGHHH!!!!

[faraway-wanderer]

@aswiftsunrise

I thought you might like these moss-filled pawprints in concrete which I saw earlier. :-)

[oldcoyote]

the thing is that it is impossible for your writing to cause harm. anyone who doesn't like your writing can immediately stop reading it, with absolutely no harm done.

if someone decides to read your writing even though it is causing them upset/boredom/whatever then that is completely ludicrous behaviour, and you are not responsible for it in any way.

however, what your writing absolutely does cause is joy! because people (including me) have read your writing and enjoyed it! it has made me smile many times! even though your fandoms are not always my fandoms, I continue to read your fic because a) the way you write characters really resonates with me, so I feel emotionally connected to them and b) I find your dialogue & descriptions really evocative, so that I often have very clear pictures of what's happening in my head.

there are lots of writers who are perfectly good, but those things don't happen when I read their writing. so I don't keep reading them! no harm done.

anyway this was a bit long, but I hope it gives you another perspective to consider.

ultimately I think you'll get through this, keep writing, and be stronger for it. sometimes life hurts, but you can't save yourself from hurt by cutting yourself off from joy.

much love x

i never actually thought about it that way - thank you for the new perspective! i agree that we are responsible for our own self care and consumption when it comes to things like reading, but in my haste to bolster my self-hatred i never considered that would apply to my writing. i always tend to see myself as the exception (as i am with things like fatphobia and ableism: i condemn it completely when it's leveled at anybody else, but when it applies to me it's true)

i have a lot of work to do, and desperately need a good therapist but all the books here are closed for the decent ones - and the bad ones are too awful to reconsider. i will keep searching

thank you so much for the advice, love. especially that last part - i will try to remember that 💛

[faraway-wanderer]

@shiv-roys-college-gf @aswiftsunrise

WHAT?! It's morning! I lost time. Things got a little heated— With a boy! Things got heated with a boy. I was at home picking lint off the sofa! I said to join us! The night's gone. The room's soiled and once again, I'm here with mop and mindlessness to clean it up. So the room got dirty, so what? I'll clean it up. No, I clean it up! You make the mess and I clean it up! Mark it on the calendar, align it with Ursa Major. Louis' tri-annual FUCK OFF and find me with apologies to follow. I'm sorry. SEEK comfort in the arms of lowlifes and unfortunates, and broken children, fine. Oh, fine! The fine that doesn't sound fine— But REVEALING our nature to a reporter you met in a bar ten hours ago? What if it was published? I was having some fun! You don't have enough to fear from Paris? I was in the middle of ending things, when YOU— YOU'D have been passed out on the floor next to him, Louis! Out on your feet from the drugs you stuffed him with! Oh, this is boring! You're boring! YOU ARE SO BORING! And here come the drugs. Colorless. Up the fangs, down this road. Flavorless. Dull! Into the heart and off with the fingers, feet. Dull! Dull nights! And wallowing brain. Dull weeks, dull months, DULL AS FUCK! Suffocation by the world's softest, beige-est pillow! The ten hours I spent with that boy were more exciting, more FASCINATING, than DECADES with YOU! Oh, there it is! The half-blank, half-apocalyptic look! But what does it mean tonight, huh? Does he want to lick my boots or chop my hands off? Is it the gremlin or the good nurse tonight? Huh? Okay. Okay, perhaps. But am I as boring as the blather committed onto the ferric tapes of your fascinating boy? "Oh, it's so, so hard to be me." "Picking lint off the sofa?!" "It's so hard to kill humans." "I can feel their feelings as I drain them." You sat on your hands and put your ear to the wind. "Everyone I know wronged me." Okay. Okay, let's wake the boy up and let's try you. "I'm the vampire Armand and my daddy vampire groomed me into a little BITCH!" "My brother he tossed himself off a roof!" "Vampires who murdered my daddy made me pretend I didn't have a dick for 240 years." "My sister buried me alive. My daughter was my sister was my throw pillow. Well, he wouldn't look at me kindly. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat." I talked shit about him the whole time. So what?! THE NAME!! The name! Unuttered in our home for 23 years, said over and over again until it was pounding in my brain like a hammer. Our problems aren't about him. And you threw her name around just for cover, but it always circled back to him. I loved her. But SHE didn't love YOU. Not like he did, not like I have. I know. I know! Yes! I know. Thank you for saying it. It's all creeping back. Paris and the, uh, what, what, what? But there's... all of it coming back. There's, uh, Paris. Paris. Can you hear that? Can you hear that, hm? Can you hear her? She's calling me.

[4423q]

aswiftsunrise replied to your post: my fetish is being liked

not to be Saucy but I like you quite a lot

gosh lewd™

[itsumohyouri]

ur a butt

[kingbard]

aswiftsunrise started following you

[faraway-wanderer]

@nolofingolfin @aswiftsunrise

[mythalrisingarchive-blog]

aswiftsunrise replied to your post: So, stupid people in the SWL rp there was that OC...

LOLOLOL all of this. I was so happy when I saw the ‘unfollow’ message. I think my jaw hit the floor when I saw the Cardiff thing.

yeah, she rubbed me the wrong way. She just sat there...like a lump...

and it totally wasn't because of that sam/lily post she made no what are out talking about I didn't get protective of sam no way

[thelatescottpilgrim-blog]

aswiftsunrise replied to your post: Ten hours of They’re Taking the Hobbits to...

I watched 20 minutes of it once. While doing other stuff too, but yeah. 20 minutes straight. Never doing that again.

I'm over nine minutes in now and all of a sudden I can't stop laughing. I must be going insane. 

So far, it's not as bad as ten minutes of I've Got A Jar Of Dirt

[mcgills]

asdfjk;asdf your blog is just so pretty and I can't stop looking at it.

Thank you so much! ♥ ♥ ♥

[faraway-wanderer]

@aswiftsunrise

moss balls in da jellyfish tank. source

[dungeonsandyubi]

1 huehue

1) if someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to?

(omg u meanie jesus fuck makin me OUT MYSELF LIKE THIS.)

Okay. Fuck. Okay.

Read: Haunted by Chuck Palahnuik

Watch: Blades of Glory

Listen to: This. Just do it.