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#as of aug 30th im editing this again
ohimsummer · 17 days
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I’LL WORSHIP LIKE A DOG .ᐟ
♯ minors dni, oral [ m. receiving ], idolization, cult leader! suguru x reader, manipulation?
⭑ ࣪ ˖ sum’z notes.ᐟ hi mickey thank u for helping proofread i love you :3 @teddybeartoji
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the cult leader has set his sights on you.
on the surface, there is nothing really notable about you. having tagged alongside a big group recruited by some of his current worshippers, you were at first regarded with suspicion—as all the newcomers were—but, eventually, you blended well with the rest of geto suguru's devout followers.
...you thought so, anyway. apparently, you were mistaken. apparently, something about you has caught his eye.
this is the handsome cult leader's den. a temple where he so graciously allows all of his humble and obedient followers to reside. with this in mind, you try not to think too highly of yourself, but you can't help but wonder if there is something about you that intrigues him. there must be.
there's a quiet call of your name on occasion, where master geto leads you to his private room. not every night, but often enough for it to feel routine. you always kneel before him quickly, wordlessly, head bowed. geto doesn't even have to open his mouth. though, if he does, it's to send you away, and the realization that you've both disappointed and disrespected the cult's leader almost makes your heart shatter. it makes you worry if this will be your last time in his room, and that anxiety builds and builds with each passing second until a week later, when he once against whispers the command for you to follow him.
once you've lowered yourself at his feet, geto takes in the sight of you. the seconds feel like minutes, hours, an eternity, but you don't dare move nor even look up at him, instead keeping your eyes closed and head lowered. only when you feel his warm caress, thumb glazing over the fat of your cheek, do you gamble a glance. whether or not he sends you away afterwards or accepts your appreciative gaze is entirely up to master geto's mood.
he thumbs over the smoothness of your skin: cheeks, chin, and then mouth, sticking the finger between your lips. pressing down on your tongue until there's a pool of drool, he soaks the digit to his satisfaction, and then makes you suck it dry. and, of course, you do so without question.
then, he's pulling off his robes, and wow, do you want to really worship the body he hides underneath. but, that is an act of adoration that you will only ever dream of. you're not nearly of enough importance for master geto to allow you such a luxury. not even a glance to the godlike features on his body, which will remain blurry visions in your peripherals, but you're satisfied with that, after all. as far as you know, the rest of his followers don't even get that. and this assumption makes you giddy. master geto must think you're special, gracing you with such a view.
you never break eye contact with him, ignoring the hands that trail to the last trace of his undergarments. even now, with his length literally inches from your face, you hold his steady stare, but your mouth waters and heart races when he pumps himself in front of you.
he begins pushing the fat, leaking tip of his cock up to your lips, glossing them up in a heavy sheen of precum. you sit still, obediently, perfectly like his little pet, as he continues to make a mess of you. geto presses his length forward until it just slips through your lips, before pulling back to smear his sticky substance over your cheeks and chin.
“open.”, he commands, and the corners of his mouth twitch up into a contemptuous smirk at the speed in which your jaw falls slack for him.
suguru pumps himself once, twice, then rubs the head again over your soft, glistening lips before tapping it on your tongue and granting you your first taste.
his hips thrust forward to enter the warm embrace of your mouth. your lips close around suguru's length automatically, and he gives a pleased hum as he uses you like a toy.
your eager eyes continue to meet his own, a lively shade of purple with a silent warning written in the hues—they dare you to disobey, to make even the slightest error and risk the fullest extent of geto suguru’s wrath. but he doesn't need to worry. he never does. you only ever act when your dearest leader instructs you, and that's just the way master geto likes it. he tells his little plaything to sit and open their mouth wide, and he knows that not a single thought will grace your head, not a word will leave your lips besides “yes, sir”.
the deeper he sinks into your throat, the harder it is to hold back a gag. regardless, you will force your body to comply and be good worshipper. constantly under the heavy gaze of the beloved cult leader, you are instilled with a fear that showing him any amount of incompetence will disappoint geto enough to clear himself of your presence, perhaps even get rid of you entirely if he feels even a second of displeasure. but, you do your best to make sure that never happens. your life depends on it.
it doesn't take long before the cult leader pulls from the depths of your throat. you try not to show disappointment that he's chosen again not to cum down your inside, but it is quickly overrun by a determination to do better. surely if you were exceeding his expectations, he'd feel the need to reward you with a steady stream of his cum down your throat.
he graces you with a low grunt before shooting ropes of seed all over your face. it's warm and sticky. you wonder about the flavor, but don't risk a taste in front of him.
master geto disappears into what you know is his bathroom, before returning with a damp rag. he holds it out in his hand for you to take, and then sits on the bed and watches as you wipe down every inch of your face. when you're done, he extends the same hand, one which you place the used cloth in, and then dismisses you from his private quarters. geto never keeps you long, usually less than an hour, but it's time you deeply treasure, regardless.
you give him one last bow, and then make your quiet exit. your heart thuds in your chest in excitement for the next time. maybe it will be in a day. maybe a week. maybe a month. whatever he thinks you are worthy of. either way, you will wait faithfully in anticipation for master geto's call.
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30 & 31 aug. 2019
👾 30th -- I woke up from really bad nightmares again on the 30th except they were really personal to me and way worse than before, I was panicking really hard. I felt bad because Strom was fronting and I know he wanted to help but I couldn’t process tone good at all so Koda had to come to front to help me calm down. It took a long time but I eventually got there. We had a small misunderstanding towards the end because I feel like I front too much and he sounded hurt that Strom wasn’t going to get to spend time with me like everyone else but we worked it out and I stayed and Hannah came back with me for a bit. 
We watched a few episodes of re:stage and it’s SO cute and so fun and we’re loving it, it’s a shame the game looks like an otome game even though they’re like 10 years old, ffs... One of the characters, Kae, is like a big tech nerd and I throttled to the front so hard that I booted Hannah out altogether by accident... but we had a good time.
Mason and I went to Walmart and I was frustrated about the phone situation and not being able to call our family but I calmed down eventually.and we had a good time getting groceries and stayed within our budget. Came home and had some important conversations with Strom about communication. It really means a lot to us that they try to work together to help each other out and leave when they’re not safe anymore or are too tired or stressed to go on. Everyone gets worn out when communicating isn’t going well and it’s so harsh to imagine not being able to ask your own system members to help you when you’re struggling... That just made me really sad. I hope they feel more confident asking for help soon because they really do deserve help when they need it.
The other day I’d gotten the passing thought that I hope cam can change his emoji one day from the swords to the handwriting emoji or something similar because, he had such a violent past and picking up oda really just made me feel like, he really has the potential to heal in a calm and safe environment now and nothing would make me happier than him being able to rest and relax and enjoy the peaceful life we have together now. Strom thought it was a great idea and that made me really happy, I almost cried. cam eventually responded that he loved me and he was glad about it and i almost cried Again. cam means the world to me and i want him to be happy and safe so much, even when i have really bad dreams that make reality hard to believe sometimes. I drew this while I was thinking about it.
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Then we talked about about system landscapes and that was fun, and went to sleep soon after. strom was really safe to be with really quickly, i feel really grateful that everyone has always been so kind and patient with me that its much easier for me to open up these days, i’ve really changed a lot, and i kind of feel like it really is for the better...
grateful for
cam being so understanding and handsome and good and wonderful and amazing all the time forever, i love him so much
koda is an angel from god for also being so patient with me and so willing to help all the time
i didn’t know strom before today but he’s really good and i had a really good time with him, he was fun to talk to and good to be with and i enjoyed our time together a lot, he was really wanting to help me too and im really grateful that he’d want to help me so much even though we just met
we’ve been drinking a lot of unsweetened iced tea the past few days and we missed iced tea SO much so that’s been really good
grateful that mason lets us process frustration at our own pace and doesn’t take it too personally
re:stage is SO fucking cute and good and we love the tiny lesbians so much
mason ended up being able to get some phone money at walmart after all and was able to set it up so we’d be able to call family the next day and i was really relieved
knowing we have enough good food to eat at home feels really domestic and comfy and good
👾 31st -- Spent like all of the livelong day talking with Strom about edits to our system sheets, there’s just so much information and its hard to be concise but I think we made a lot of really really good progress! We love talking about sheet stuff and our systems and all that Good Stuff. We’re having some trouble figuring out how guardianships and ccs and relationships and such work, but... I think we made some progress there too, kind of. Then we spent a thousand years doing height comparisons for lots of our system members, theirs and ours, and that was really fun too.
Then I made stir fry dinner for me and Mason and it was trouble on the wrists but it turned out really delicious and au enjoyed it and it was really worth it! Realized I had more medication than I thought I did so we definitely have enough to last until Griffin can bring us our next set. I stayed up way too late for the 29343489th time but, it happens... and that’s about it!
grateful for
was able to get in touch with our mom and unfortunately one of our aunts passed away (mary), but grandpa has some appointments to get his hernia fixed and that’s relieving
talking about system stuff with husband is SO MUCH FUN all the time, i had a great time even though they made way more progress on their sheet than i did the whole day sdlfkj
making dinner was really satisfying for our worthiness brains even though it hurt physically
happy that mason ended up liking it even though we’ve never made stir fry that way before now
extremely happy that we won’t have to go without meds at all (as long as griffin is able to get them up here this coming weekend)
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