#as is liam's ongoing trauma about it

[pagerunner-j]

(source)

(Replies included Liam adding "that's a tiny tub" and Sam responding, "JUST big enough. We did the math.")

[oliverferrie]

It's Trans Day of Rememberance, time to support your local trans author while they are still alive

I originally put this thread up on blue birb hellsite, but I wanted to make a longer, more nuanced post for Tumblr. TDOR is a heavy day for me, and every time I see the list of names it makes me want to squirrel away and cry. So instead I want to spread around some books by trans authors, to uplift our voices. The books themselves are not necessarily about trans characters (mine is not) but my experience as a trans guy does inform the text, and when I read these other works, I feel a kinship to the author in that regard, however imagined that is.

I'll start, it's me, buy my horrific (seriously, read the content warning) fantasy book about young queers surviving atrocities: SUGAR PEOPLE

Next up: Δάιος, by Andromeda Ruins (@andromedaexists). A heavy anti-establishment retelling of the fall of Icarus that leans heavily into the reality of queer folk as outcast and put at risk by the powers that be. I have yet to finish it but the prose really slaps you with its urgency.

Next up: FEMININ GANGE (Feminine gait), by Molly Øxnevad, a contemporary novel about the trans healthcare system in Norway. It's written in Norwegian (bokmål) but I really hope to see it translated in English one day because it's such an important piece of literature on the state of our centralised transmedical health system here in norway.

Next up, MAO SIN RAUDE KJOLE (Mao's Red Dress), by Jan Elisabeth Lindvik, (also norwegian, nynorsk) a coming of age novel set in the backdrop of the sixties. It's only really available in Norway, and it's another one I hope to see translated someday, but it's worth knowing about, as it's a seminal novel by a trans activist with so many decades of lived experience, as the country slowly changed its views around trans folk.

Next, we have JACK OF THORNS, Book 1 of INHERITANCE by AK Faulkner, a dark urban fantasy featuring messy queers and LOTS of trauma. I had the pleasure of meeting Faulkner at a con earlier this year, and they have got an awesome thing going with the Inheritance universe. I've been enjoying Jack of Thorns a lot, it does not hold back.

Next, it's the astounding FRESHWATER by Akwaeke Emezi, a magical contemporary novel about dissociative experiences and trauma, and how they interplay with culture and growing up. A very intense and beautifully written book that isn't afraid to tackle dissociative identities AND gender identity (something those of us who have both often have to mask for fear of being denied treatment).

AND THEY LIVED... by Stephen Salvatore, a very contemporary YA romance that deals with societal issues around being gay and nonbinary. It's written from the POV of a cringey, hopeful teen, and dances between happily-ever-after romance and a pointed exhumation of incredibly dark things.

Finally, LARK & KASIM START A REVOLUTION by Kacen Callender, a contemporary YA written in a comfortably snappy rhythm, about love, friendship and a social media mishap that spirals out of control.

If you are an author listed here and you want off this list, just let me know! If you are an author and you want ON this list, feel free to reblog and add your stuff.

Otherwise, go forth and support a trans author today! Connect with our stories, real and imagined. Increase empathy and understanding around the world. Maybe TDOR will be a memorial of the past one day, instead of a memorial of the present day.

[painandmovies]

also want to say: Maya Henry is NOT at fault for coming forward, and claiming victims to be attention-seeking is harmful to all victims, which contributes to the the reasoning for why victims stay silent in the first place. Not everyone was aware that her book was about Liam, prior to the confirmation (I definitely wasn't), and she deserved to definitively address situations and talk about him in a way that left no room for denial in her experiences when masses of people choose what they want to acknowledge and accept as truth. People are allowed to be held accountable, and he had the free-will/means to seek therapy himself. No one should be blamed for someone's death, nevertheless after years of that person stalking/calling that led to speaking out as a right to do with one's trauma that doesn't need to be privatized or due to ongoing problems. Acting like she or online hatred is the root cause of what happened, while ignoring a long history of tragic decisions, that were STILL very much his DECISIONS, is naive, oversimplified, and cruel at the very worst of it all.

And also, I don't know if people aren't aware, as mentally ill people, you can feel low/down/depressed/and more, but threatening someone about the future state of your life to make them feel responsible for it/what happens IS abusive.

[littlefanthings]

It occurred to me today that I think the thing that makes C3 feel different than C1 & 2 is that instead of the characters becoming better people on a typical heroes journey a few of them are kind of becoming worse?

Bells Hells are kind of a dark twist on the ragtag bunch of misfits who make a family and learn how to be heroes because they constantly make very shady choices. What would normally be a group of friends supporting each other has turned into a bit of enabling of questionable decisions.

Imogen’s one bad day away from going full Dark Phoenix.

FCG is developing a disturbing god complex that will likely get someone killed (and they’re kind of hoping it’s themselves?)

Fearne, whose morals were always a bit wonky, found her parents and finally realized she’s so pissed at them she doesn’t kind actually hurting them (just a little).

Ashton has no faith in humanity and constantly invalidates Laudna’s horrifying past experiences because he won’t accept that it’s possible to go through terrible things and learn to move on.

The funny thing is that the member of the group with the strongest moral backbone is Orym, played by Liam, who initially built Caleb to go down similar dark paths as the Hells but was so drastically changed by the love from the M9 he completely abandoned his ongoing mission to change his past for fear of hurting them.

I often think about the choices the CR team made when creating their characters for each campaign and what was going on in their lives that may have influenced their decisions. I can’t help but wonder if the pandemic has had some sort of say in the darker turns in these characters. As we all know, D&D is therapy and the world has been going through some shit these past few years. I wouldn’t be surprised if these morally grey-er characters are a way of sorting out some of the trauma (intentionally or not).

[angelasscribbles]

This or That Tag Game

Thanks for the tag @jerzwriter

Historical or futuristic?

- Historical fiction was one of my first (reading) loves!! But I do love sci-fi, so futuristic is also awesome! Can I choose both?

Opening or Closing Chapter?

- As a writer? Closing. I love the feeling or wrapping a series up! As a reader? Opening! I'm sad when I have to leave a book world.

Light and Fluffy or Dark and Gritty?

- You know what? I'm gong to steal Elsa's answer because I couldn't have said it better:

Dark and Gritty, I love light and fluffy, too, but I really like things that delve into human emotion. Stories that show people triumphing over trauma and hurt, learning, losing, growing - that doesn't happen in fluff.

I'm just going to add that, for me, happily ever after is better when the angst and darkness came first. Obstacles were overcome and/or they had to fight to be together, etc. makes the ending better.

Animal Companion or Found Family?

- Found family.

Horror or Romance?

- Again, I don't want to choose. I used to be a huge horror fan and have really only come around to romance when I started writing in here.

Hard Magic or Soft Magic?

- Hard, no question. I like things to make sense, even in fiction and especially when I'm being asked to suspend disbelief. Make it make sense within the framework of the fictional world.

One project at a time or Juggling 2 or more?

- So...I currently have 11 ongoing series, a round-robin I'm running, and a writer's group I'm about to launch. That's not counting any of the one-shots I'm currently working on or the trr visuals blog I recently launched. So I guess that answers the question. Although to be fair, it's just about too much. I strongly need to finish several of them and get back to something more reasonable.

One award winner or One bestseller?

- I guess out of those two choices, bestseller. But here I again agree with Elsa's answer about the best thing being when someone tells me that my writing helped them through a tough time. I've had a couple of different readers tell me something similar and it is the best feeling in the world to know that I helped someone like that in any kind of small way!

Fantasy or Sci-fi?

- BOTH and I refuse to choose!

First Draft or Final Draft?

- So....this is difficult. They both give dopamine hits in different ways.

Love triangle in everything or No romantic arcs?

- Love triangle Always!

Constant sandstorm or rainstorm?

- Rainstorm. In the words of Eddie Rabbitt, I love a rainy night!

Tagging the following people and pretty much anyone else who wants to play!! @karahalloway @harleybeaumont @alj4890 @aussiegurl1234 @nestledonthaveone @bebepac @dcbbw @walkerdrakewalker @tessa-liam @kristinamae093 @kingliam2019 @twinkleallnight @twinkle-320 @peonierose @lovingchoices14 @secretaryunpaid @queen-arabella-of-cordonia @indiacater @tinkie1973 @queenmiarys @amandablink @differenttyphoonwerewolf   @bascmve01 @aallotarenunelma @inlocusmads @hannahsrambles2  @little-mouse-gardens @brieflyinfatuated

[medranochav]

went to a queer family event after a totally exhausting visit with my brother and his wife this morning... at this dragstravaganza there was so much love and it was so wholesome and we ran into friends and m'babies had so much fun...

and really, it was such an antithesis to the absolute mania and insecurity that is my brother's charade of a marriage.

it's always emotionally laborious to have to navigate around his pathological/unnecessary lies. he's so precious about his meritless reputation that he's like permanently allergic to accountability. and how that intersects with two people who have a combined 20 years of therapy under their belts (my sis and i), fractious at best.

it's just sad to see someone hold on to this flimsy narrative about themselves based on nothing but lies to the point that everything they say is just an excuse to protect it. its bold of him to bring his wife around too, because in doing so he runs the very real risk of some lie of his being exposed (which happened today ofc). ANYWAY, narcissists are sepratists for a reason and he's booboo the fool for thinking we're not going to call some innocuous lie out because we're scared of his petulance. he's a violator and selfish and all to just look good on paper.

but I digress! I'm just saying, who am I on paper today? an overgrown queeirdo whos helping to raise a bunch of babies... I'm 30+, single, broke, a lil worse for the wear, I got a BFA and I infrequently freelance as an MUA??? yeah on paper, maybe so. But I'm also funny and an absolute charmer who's DEVASTATINGLY REAL. so, im maybe not the winningest millenial. but I'm currently fcking wealthy in love and magic. so much of who i am is immaterial...

the longer I'm in treatment and doing the work to heal from not only the trauma we share from being raised by the same mother but also the trauma of his ongoing abuse of ME lmaooo.... the more I realize the futility of "looking good on paper."

a good reputation is a status the men in my life exclusively earn through their privilege and/or the labor of the women in their lives.

seriously I can't qualify what it feels like to have conquered so much of what kept me broken. I can't quantify the magical interactions I have in group therapy or with mommy friends at the school events. I get no likes for having a family that accepts and loves me for the queer non binary person I am. I don't get money in the bank everytime these babies tell me they love me and yet I'm RICH. I sometimes really resent that "on paper" shit but a la misma vez I don't sweat it so much either, cuz know what I got.

and really my point was after the drag show, when we were all back in the car and before heading home... I thanked my family for riding so hard for me and my community and for accepting me because that hasn't been the case for so many lgbt babies of the world. I told them I loved them and that i'm truly lucky. to which Liam responded with, "we are so lucky to have you."

and that's TEA

[splickedylit]

Okay well this is going to just be presented in whatever order things arrive to me, SO for one thing they're fully down to steal steal modern texts on medical procedures and sciences. The Fleet isn't above just sneaking up and taking what they want, whether that's ships or medical texts. Liam fully went to college for his genetic engineering degree and finished out the normal way, but I don't think it's uncommon for fleet people to go through a lot of a medical course on land (funneling resources and information back to the Fleet and recording as much as possible as they go) and then vanish into the night to go through their residencies with Fleet surgeons or nurses.

Getting used to doing either nursing or surgery on a ship would be. A lot, I imagine! Deeply unfortunate that a lot of the more intense traumas and surgeries that the Fleet has to do probably happen during storm season, when people are getting caught between things, run over by things, thrown into things, etc. The most intense medical care would preferentially be in places like the Washington--the biggest ships with the least pitch and yaw would make the best surgical suites and ICUs, especially considering any kind of heavy equipment would most likely have to be fixed pretty firmly in place so that whatever turbulence they did encounter wouldn't fling your ventilator across the room or what have you.

....I don't think they force you to donate your body to medicine on the Fleet, but I do think the default assumption is probably that they can just. Have your body*?? The Fleet has cultivated an atmosphere of "well if you have something to offer your community, of course you will offer it for everybody's good". It's both crucial to how well it's managed to stick together, and also very intrusive and dystopian for a lot of landside immigrants and visitors. But the Fleet is a huge source of published resources on surgery/medicine for genemods! The ongoing medical treatment, gene-sequencing, and autopsy of mods on the Fleet produces papers and studies that honestly make up for their habit of occasionally sneaking into universities in cities for hundreds of miles around and stealing books and things haha.

Part of that being the fact that residents need to get real good at doing surgeries and procedures during storm situations. While Rich and all his coworkers are storm-docking and piloting the ships through the storms, a bunch of new doctors and nurses are piling into operating rooms and medical suites to practice surgery and placing IVs/drawing blood under the most turbulent conditions available.** This is another reason that it's considered a very good thing for people to donate their bodies, because like. You want them to have PLENTY of experience doing their jobs during superstorms.

.....I'd imagine the Fleet leans more on oxygen compressors than on restocking big O2 tanks and storing them--if we can make up float tubes and antigravity tech, I think we can make up that O2 compression has advanced to be much more ubiquitously available lol. Obviously modern ships store O2 tanks for medical situations and have regulations for that, etc, but if you're going to be permanently out on the water you'd have to find a way to supply your O2 in a stable, long-term way, and reloading repeatedly on land doesn't seem tenable. 🤔

Medical personnel's uniform fleet-assigned color is bright red, by the way. dark red: captain. scarlet: medical. Does this lead to a lot of semi-serious jokes between medical personnel about how they're basically as important as the captains?? yes.

Locally, if I was administration, I would want at least one person with medical training in any given constellation, to the point I wouldn't be surprised if part of applying to arrange your ships in a residential constellation is figuring out who in that constellation is going to have the training and getting them certified--if they're not already--in some basic urgent-care level interventions. Somebody who knows how to clean out a wound and do sutures, assess a concussion, treat heat-stroke or hypothermia (especially from falling in the water) and maybe do some portable/less in-depth scans or tests and triage people. Ala the person who sits in the emergency exit row on an airplane--not a full-time job but a sort of civilian volunteer who's willing to say "yeah I'm willing to be responsible for this".

--

*they'll give it back almost every time so you can do your preferred post-mortem rituals! looking pretty much the same! just let them have your body, the residents need cadavers. what are you, a post-mortem freeloader?? **as a nurse: every time the storm season rolls around the nurses 10000% are practicing blood draws and IVs on themselves and on tolerant family/friends.

Once again I am thinking about the medical system of the Michigan Fleet, which we will not get to write about much because Rich is our POV character and he hates medical stuff. TuT

[fuckyeahwarriorwomen]

DC WILL HONOR THE 80TH ANNIVERSARY OF WONDER WOMAN WITH HUGE LINE-UP OF PUBLISHING RELEASES

For the global celebration of Wonder Woman, DC is honoring the iconic character’s 80th anniversary with a vibrant collection of commemorative releases, free editions and new series launches. Headlined by the inspiring anthology showcasing 23 trailblazing women around the world, Wonderful Women of the World, DC will also thrill Wonder Woman fans with a 100-page spectacular, a commemorative hardcover and multiple brand-new series, all to pegged to the global celebration of Wonder Woman Day on October 21.

Plus, fans can delve into the history and enduring influence of the iconic character this October with the “Wonder Woman Authors & Talent Panel” on DC Community.

WONDER WOMAN: 80 YEARS OF THE AMAZON WARRIOR- On Sale September 14, 2021 Featuring acclaimed DC writers and artists like George Pérez, Phil Jimenez, William Moulton Marston, Harry G. Peter, Joye Hummel, Jill Thompson, Greg Rucka, Nicola Scott, Becky Cloonan, and Jen Bartel, this hardcover special edition spans over 400 pages and follows the famous Amazon Warrior in her enduring fight for justice. Starting from the first appearance of Wonder Woman through some of her most incredible battles against foes like the Cheetah and Ares, this can't-miss collection of Wonder Woman through her eight decades of heroism. It includes new essays and interviews about the enduring legacy of the iconic Super Hero from Gal Gadot, Lynda Carter, Patty Jenkins, and Trina Robbins as well as never-before-collected stories.

WONDERFUL WOMEN OF THE WORLD - On Sale September 28, 2021

DC brings together a collection of talented writers and artists to celebrate international role models for teens and kids with a new young adult anthology. Standing for truth, justice and equality, Wonder Woman serves as inspiration for the profiles and portraits of 23 pioneering women from around the globe. Tales of the real-world heroes who take up Princess Diana of Themyscira’s mantle and work in the fields of science, sports, activism, diplomacy, and more include Beyoncé, Serena Williams, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Greta Thunberg, and Malala Yousafzai, amongst others. Featuring a cover illustrated by acclaimed Wonder Woman artist Nicola Scott and spearheaded by The New York Times bestselling author Laurie Halse Anderson (Speak, Wonder Woman: Tempest Tossed) who serves as editor, the young adult anthology will hit shelves pegged to the milestone 80th anniversary celebration of Wonder Woman.

WONDER WOMAN 80TH ANNIVERSARY 100-PAGE SUPER SPECTACULAR - On Sale October 5, 2021

An oversize super spectacular featuring new stories that capture timeless messages of hope and empowerment are presented together in this gorgeous keepsake issue. With new adventures from acclaimed DC talent including writers Becky Cloonan, Michael W. Conrad, Jordie Bellaire, Mark Waid, Tom King, Steve Orlando, G. Willow Wilson, Amy Reeder, Vita Ayala and Stephanie Phillips, and artists Jim Cheung, Paulina Ganucheau, Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez, Joe Prado, Amy Reeder, Evan “Doc” Shaner, Isaac Goodhart, Laura Braga, Marcio Takara, and Meghan Hetrick, this one-of-a-kind special will showcase Diana’s past, present, and future to celebrate Wonder Woman’s legacy. This keepsake collection will also be available with variant covers spotlighting Wonder Woman across different incarnations including the Golden, Silver, Bronze and Modern Ages along with cover artwork inspired by her big and small-screen incarnations, from artists Will Murai, Cat Staggs, Bruce Timm, Jen Bartel, Amy Reeder, Michael Cho, Travis Moore and Cliff Chiang.

NUBIA AND THE AMAZONS - Series Launch October 5, 2021

The world will know her name! Follow the ongoing adventures of Nubia with this unforgettable miniseries written by Vita Ayala and Stephanie Williams with art from all-star artist Alitha Martinez (Future State) . After the thrilling events of Infinite Frontier, Nubia becomes queen of Themyscira, but the new title also brings challenges. With the unexpected arrival of new Amazons, our hero is forced to reckon with her past and forge a new path forward for her sisters. Little does she know, a great evil grows beneath the island and it’s up to this former guardian of Doom’s Doorway to unite her tribe before paradise is lost forever!

WONDER WOMAN: ADVENTURES OF YOUNG DIANA SPECIAL - On Sale October 12, 2021

Collected together for the first time, these backup stories by Eisner Award-winner Jordie Bellaire and rising star Paulina Ganucheau provide an intimate look into Wonder Woman’s upbringing and the dangerous secrets of her past. The  young princess of Themyscira struggled to find her place on an island deemed paradise by many, but which is, to her, a prison. Trapped in her role as a royal and shielded from the harsh realities of Man’s World, Diana yearned for adventure, or at least a purpose. When ancient texts portraying her home’s history go missing, she gets both. How far will our hero go to find the texts and the truths they’re hiding?

WONDER WOMAN #780 - On Sale October 12, 2021

The iconic Super Hero returns in the ongoing WONDER WOMAN series featuring writers Becky Cloonan and Michael W. Conrad and art by Travis Moore. After the events of Death Metal, Diana finally makes it back from her unforgettable odyssey through the Sphere of the Gods! Has the world moved on without her? This special oversize story paves the way into an exciting new future for the greatest hero of them all.

WONDER WOMAN HISTORIA: THE AMAZONS - Series Launch October 19, 2021

Best-selling DC talent Kelly Sue DeConnick (Aquaman) and Phil Jimenez (Wonder Woman By Phil Jimenez Omnibus) launches one of the most highly-anticipated releases of the year. Millennia ago, Queen Hera and the goddesses of the Olympian pantheon grew greatly dissatisfied with their male counterparts… and far from their sight, they put a plan into action. A new society was born, one never before seen on Earth, capable of wondrous and terrible things, but their existence could not stay secret for long. When a despairing woman named Hippolyta crossed the Amazons’ path, a series of events was set in motion that would lead to an outright war in heaven—and the creation of the Earth’s greatest guardian! One of the most unforgettable DC tales of all time begins here, with subsequent issues featuring art by modern masters Gene Ha and Nicola Scott releasing in the spring and autumn of 2022.

DIANA PRINCESS OF THE AMAZONS - Free Special Edition Out October 19, 2021

From The New York Times bestselling authors Shannon and Dean Hale comes a story about making mistakes, learning the hard way, and becoming a hero. Eleven-year-old Diana is the only child on the island of Themyscira. Wanting someone her own age to talk to, she takes matters into her own hands and creates a playmate out of clay. But things quickly get out of control and Diana must decide whether she’s made a new friend…or a monster! This special edition features an extended sample from the full-length graphic novel with art from Victoria Ying.

WONDER WOMAN #1 - Free Special Edition Out October 19, 2021

Celebrate 80 years of the Amazon Warrior with this special edition of the first issue of the acclaimed series by DC superstars Greg Rucka and Liam Sharp, kicking off the epic storyline, “The Lies.” Why has the lasso of truth stopped working? Start down the rabbit hole as dark secrets from Wonder Woman's past unravel her present!

WONDER WOMAN: TEMPEST TOSSED - Free Special Edition Out October 19, 2021

The New York Times bestselling author Laurie Halse Anderson reimagines Wonder Woman’s origin in this timely story about the refugee experience, teenage activism, and finding the love and strength to create change. This special edition features an extended sample from the full-length graphic novel, with art by Leila Del Duca.

WONDER GIRL #6 - On Sale October 26, 2021

In the latest issue written by Joëlle Jones with art by Leila del Duca, after encountering Wonder Girl and Artemis, Yara believes now more than ever that she needs to find her lost sisters. Only they hold the answers to the trauma of her past and fear of the future. Is Yara a hero? Or is she a weapon of the gods wielded to destroy all Amazons?

WONDER WOMAN BLACK & GOLD #5 - On Sale October 26, 2021

Prepare to be whisked away with an Amazon fairy tale, flown back to World War II, swept up in a nautical ghost story, and blasted by a bitter space princess! Don’t miss the penultimate issue of this golden moment for Diana and her legacy written by Peter J. Tomasi, Kurt Busiek, Sanya Anwar, Trung Le Nguyen, and Josie Campbell, with art by Christian Alamy, Ben Dewey, Sanya Anwar, Trung Le Nguyen, and Carlos D’anda.

[c-is-for-circinate]

So here’s the thing:  I really, honestly do not get the appeal in Widojest.  I don’t entirely see the appeal in Caleb Widogast.  And I’m okay with that; I have other faves who I pay more attention to; I get to do that, because my show is 3-5 hours long every goddamn week that it airs and there is plenty of time for literally everyone.  And I do not have to be a Caleb stan to understand at a really fundamental level that, hey, even if he isn’t important to me?  He is very clearly very important to a lot of actual real-live people.

There will always, always be stories that aren’t for you.  Maybe they just don’t speak to you at all.  Maybe they hit buttons in your brain that remind you of real hurts.  It’s always going to happen.  In a perfect world, with perfect representation where there are stories for you everywhere, there will still be stories that aren’t.

And it hurts, I know it does, when you feel like the story you want for you doesn’t exist anywhere, but here’s one more story that isn’t it.  It hurts when there’s a story that you thought was for you and then it turns out not to care about you at all.  There should be more stories for all of us, especially the stories that feel like they’re not getting told.

That is a real, valid pain.  We all clear on that?

Good.  Because this next part is also absolutely true:

The story that is not for you is very important to someone else.  And particularly in fandom spaces, there is a very good chance that the someone else in question has experienced marginalization on the basis of gender, sexuality, race, disability, mental illness, or general trauma.

The story that is not for you has worth.

People who find worth in stories that are not for you--even if your story is underrepresented and their story really has been told one hundred billion times before, even then--ARE NOT INHERENTLY BAD PEOPLE for finding worth in those stories.

There’s this extra dimension to this particular ship war, where I think a lot of Beaujester shippers are so angry not because of what’s actually happened, but because of what years of pattern recognition has taught them (taught us?) must inevitably be coming next.  When a leading man in a fantasy series, on an arc of learning to better himself and maybe even value or forgive himself, repeatedly expresses unrequited love for a girl who he believes is too good for him, the narrative will give her to him in the end.  This is a pattern and it’s real and its existence hurts, outside of Widojest, just in general in the world.

And on one hand: that has not happened yet with Widojest, and there is a very good chance, for a million reasons, that it won’t!  And on the other hand: even if it did happen, that would not be an excuse for violent or abusive behavior, or to dismiss the worth that story might have to other people!  And on the third hand: yes, I totally see why it feels like that’s the trope being invoked here, and why that is scary, and why it hurts!

We know about Caleb’s feelings in this one specific way and we don’t know about Jester’s.  In theory that means that Jester’s feelings could be ANYTHING, and this could go ANYWHERE, and of course Caleb and Liam would respect Jester and Laura’s ‘no’, and there is plenty of agency all around and that’s great.  In practice, it can feel like another reminder of that old trope, where the male lead character’s emotions are given to the audience like something important, and the female lead character’s feelings are generally passed off as vague platonic affection until the final romantic reveal, and we have to extrapolate what was going through her head the whole time.

We know that Critical Role cares about representation and queer visibility, and without a network to fight, they get to make the show as gay as they want.  In theory this means that we can trust them to give us the rep we’re craving.  In practice, we worry, because in an ad-libbed show where you don’t have to plan ahead or deliberately fight for representation, it’s easy to accidentally slip into old familiar patterns and biases without even noticing they’re there.

We know that Laura’s agency and Jester’s agency matter here, that of course it’s not just about Caleb, and in theory that should make ANY romantic ending better and good and right and fine, but in practice--well, what does it mean, when you’ve got agency over a story, and use it to choose to tell what feels like the same old story all over again?

And right, let me say it again: none of this has happened yet.  QUITE LIKELY NONE OF IT EVER WILL.  We don’t know!!!  Not even the players know!!!

Which, maybe that’s the scariest thing of all.  When I’m watching a scripted show, I usually know what to expect out of the formula.  I know when a show is going to be queerbaity and then quit gay chicken at the last second.  I expect it.  I can feel out how trustworthy the showrunners are in a few episodes, and while sometimes there’s a long slow decline or a short sharp surprise, after 20-30 years of media engagement, I know what I’m going to get.

I suspect that CR feels like it should be more “trustworthy,” to many Beaujester shippers, in terms of providing the kind of story they’re craving--but it’s so hard to know for sure.  It’s so hard to know whether to brace for disappointment, or be resigned, or ragequit and be done with it, or most terrifyingly at all, to be hopeful.

It’s hard.  I do get that it’s hard.

And it’s really easy, isn’t it, to go on twitter and tumblr and into the comments sections on critrole.com and fuck knows where else, I’m assuming there’s a Discord somewhere that I’m not cool enough to know about, and be furious.  To be mean.  To blame the fear of not getting the story that will mean something to me, again, on anyone else.  To make fucking death threats, I don’t even know why that seems acceptable or easy to anyone, but it’s just words typed on a keyboard, so yeah, I guess it’s easy.

Do not fucking do that!  Don’t do it!  Whether you identify with everything I’ve said here or you have a completely different reason to be full of rage and fury, don’t do the furious threats thing!  Just don’t!  That, also, is easy!!!  And doing absolutely nothing is at least as effective as being violently angry at strangers on the internet, so it has that going for it as well.

There are a lot of feelings to be had here, and I’m sure not going to sum them all up or solve the problem of representation in fiction in one tumblr post, but maybe we can change this discussion a little.  Maybe we can redirect.

I started this post by saying that I’m not the world’s biggest Caleb fan.  I don’t mind him, but his story doesn’t particularly speak to me.  I don’t love the amount of space he takes up in the ongoing fandom discussion.  I particularly don’t love that every single time he comes up, the volume of discussion doubles because of people vociferously objecting to every single thing about him.

So I find the parts of the story that are for me.  I let the people who want to have Caleb discussions have their Caleb discussions, because they are enjoying a thing they like and I’m glad for him, and then I host a discussion about Beau or Fjord or Caduceus or whoever, because I WANT TO HAVE FUN TOO.  I am watching this show because it is full to the brim with things I like and have thoughts about.  There is SO MUCH OF THAT TO GO AROUND.

[just-stop]

From AFLW to roller derby, experts say its time to take concussion in women's sport seriously

When the Crows chase their third AFLW premiership on Saturday, captain Chelsea Randall will be watching from the sidelines.

A concussion from a collision during last week's preliminary final left her ruled out of the match.

It's a bitter sweet way to end a season — but as Sarah McCarthy knows, a concussion can have much longer consequences

In 2016, Sarah was the jammer for her Sydney roller derby team, skating at high speed in the league's Grand Final, aiming to get past the opposition and score points.

Risks of contact sport

Sarah McCarthy received a knock to the head during a roller derby match.

"I was a few feet in front of the pack, looking over my shoulder," she tells ABC RN's Sporty.

As she skated, a competitor's elbow hit Sarah's neck and jaw hard and she crashed to the ground.

She doesn't remember if she passed out or not, but recalls feeling briefly sick.

She got up, sat out for awhile, but later re-joined the bout, feeling reasonably ok.

It was Sarah's second concussion that week, having had an earlier blow at training.

The next few months passed in a blur of sickness, dizziness and ringing ears.

"I could barely make it past lunch time without falling asleep. My head felt like it was in a vice 24 hours a day," she says.

What was worse, says Sarah, was the memory loss, heightened emotions, and constant haze in her mind as she struggled to manage a big work project.

Sarah's experience is not out of the ordinary. Experts say sportswomen are at higher risk of concussion than male athletes, and the effects of concussion in women tend to be more severe.

Sarah still lives with the ongoing after effects of her concussion even today.

Almost five years on, Sarah continues to live with the implications of Post Concussion Syndrome.

"I struggled verbally, and I still do now if I have a poor night's sleep," Sarah says.

"It's almost like I'm sitting on a chair in a room with a curtain around me and all of my vocabulary is just beyond the curtain. And I can't reach it or I use the wrong words. I forget people's name all the time," she says.

"I'm fatigued every day. I still can't exercise. I can't handle stress, I can't handle light, I can't handle sounds."

What happens when you're concussed?

Dr Adrian Cohen, an emergency and trauma physician who researches concussion prevention, says concussion is not as simple as was once thought.

He says concussion results in less blood flow to the brain.

This means brain cells, called neurons, don't get enough oxygen and glucose. They also suffer a "structural deformity".

Basically, Dr Cohen says, the brain has a "metabolic crisis" and neurons stop working properly.

Why is concussion more common in women?

We don't have enough data on the size of the problem, Dr Cohen says.

But research and scrutiny of concussion in women in sport is growing — largely in the wake of developments in elite men's sport such as the AFL and NFL.

"Doctors like myself who work in this area are definitely seeing it more often and we're seeing it with more severity," Dr Cohen says.

He says women sustain more concussions than men in high-impact sports such as rugby league, rugby union and Australian rules football. Women also take longer to recover.

One possibility is that women may be more likely to report concussion.

But Dr Cohen says there are complex physiological factors at play.

"There are structural differences between men and women's brains," he says.

"They actually have a slightly faster metabolism than male brains, and they have slightly greater oxygen flow to the head.

"The cells themselves can be thought of as being slightly hungrier. So in the context of an injury that disrupts the supply of glucose and oxygen, it can help explain why they suffer more damage."

He also says women are joining high impact sports without years of tackle training and have had less opportunity to build up the strong neck muscles crucial in protecting against impact.

Dr Cohen says these factors are not an argument for reducing women's participation in contact sport — the benefits, he says, far outweigh the risks — but he is urging for new ways to minimise those risks.

"We have to outlaw illegal play that causes damage, we have to get people off the field when they have an injury, we have to recognise concussion," he says.

He is part of a team developing a new device which he says can quickly and accurately assess a player for concussion.

"Instead of just asking somebody whether they're okay, and putting [them] through a 10 minute test, which seems fundamentally flawed at the moment, we have got to put this in the field of objectivity."

Concussion and migranes

Dr Rowena Mobbs, a Macquarie University neurologist who researches and treats the effects of concussion in sportspeople, says there is truth to suggestions that women experience concussion symptoms more severely.

"But there is this really important overlap of chronic migraine after trauma, and the term for this is post-traumatic headache," she says.

"When we talk about migraine ... they're the same multitude of symptoms that can occur in concussion.

"So you can be dizzy and clouded in your thinking, lethargic and have double vision. And we know that women are at three times the risk of chronic migraine than men."

A woman on roller skates playing roller derby can be seen flying up the court.

Experts say more research is needed into concussion in sportswomen.(Liam Mitchell Photography )

She suggests there could be an association between chronic migraine syndrome and concussion, a kind of double whammy for women.

"It's really a complex area," Dr Mobbs says.

"It's fairly new to research because, unfortunately, there's been so much preferred research in men in sport, and we're only just now approaching female concussion."

In Australia, the Sports Brain Bank works on diseases such as chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE) and other brain disorders associated with previous concussions or head impacts.

Dr Cohen says there are several Australian sports women who've pledged to donate their brain to the Sports Brain Bank.

"But in general terms, these women won't have been playing the games for as long, and at as high a level," he says.

He says concussion and its long-term consequences "are a numbers game".

"The more impacts to the head you have, the more likely you are to suffer short, medium and long-term consequences. Therefore, the more likely it is to show up as CTE. But we're going to be seeing it in women unfortunately, in the not too distant future."

Invisible injuries

Concussion rules are changing in Australian football codes — the rules that mandated Randall miss the AFLW grand final were brought in earlier this year.

Dr Mobbs welcomes these new rules, but hopes the conversation in elite sport will extend to how concussion is managed at training and in community sport.

In 2019, the Australian Institute of Sport released an updated set of concussion guidelines to improve player safety and address rising concerns in the community around the links between concussion and CTE, which has been linked to dementia and behavioural problems.

Dr Mobbs wants measures like restricting heading the ball in soccer training to be considered.

"We must look after people's brains," she says.

"We can preserve what we love about the sports, they can still be played hard, but it just means that we've got to all get together and think of ways we can preserve brain health for these players."

Sarah McCarthy wishes she'd been stopped from returning to play in the 2016 grand final, and regrets not taking time to immediately rest after the injuries.

She has advice for other people who experience concussion.

"First and foremost, stop everything - stop," she says.

"If you can, stay in a dark room, don't do anything that's too mentally taxing. Don't exercise.

"If I had taken that four to six weeks to rest [and] not have too much mental and emotional stimulation, I think my recovery would have been a lot quicker."

[the-cookie-of-doom]

“and we know that Peter was canonically obsessed with Scott" LMFAO, talking about wishful thinking and canon erasure! Confusing what you desperately wanted to happen with what actually happened in canon once again, aren’t we, delusionals? 

Actually, what we know is that Peter Hale canonically doesn’t give a literal crap about Scott McCall, has always considered Scott McCall like a particularly dumb (or should I say "below average”?), annoying fly in his ointment to get rid of, and has never even bothered to hide the fact that he wants to see true nuisance Scoot dead and preferibly buried six feet under for good–hence Peter actively trying to kill Scott on several occasions, actively encouraging Malia, Liam, and the others to “kill it” and “aim at the skull” in season 4, and then actively encouraging Malia to leave Scott to die in season 6. We also know that Peter Hale did get a redemption arc, and that Peter Hale’s entire redemption arc canonically revolves around Derek Hale, Cora Hale, Stiles Stilinski, Lydia Martin, and his own daughter. That’s literally canon, delusionals. *shrugs* 

As for Peter needing Derek and Scott’s help in season 1, Peter has explicitly said that the reason wolves hunt in packs is because their favourite prey (the Argents in Peter’s case) is too big and too strong to be taken down by a single wolf, and that he needed at least two betas in order to take down the Argents. I mean, it’s obvious Peter does actually care about Derek (in his own morbid, twisted, unique way, that is), but Scott? Scott was just an accidental tool at best; and Peter has never made a secret of the fact that he had no other use for him besides that either. Once achieved his revenge, Scott could go die in a ditch alongside Gerard Argent for all Peter cared. 

And of course it wasn’t Scott’s choice to get bitten by a feral wolf! But neither was Peter’s to bite Scott specifically either, since canon makes it crystal clear that the only reason Scott got ever bitten in the first place is because Peter was literally INSANE [Peter himself admitted that he wasn’t in his right mind at the time] and Scott just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time (friendly reminder that no one has ever put a gun to Scott’s head and forced him to follow his neurodivergent best friend into the woods that night, Scott chose to follow Stiles on his own volition.) Peter canonically didn’t bite Scott because he wanted to recruit Scott specifically or because he thought Scott was anything special–the literal opposite, actually. It could have been anyone, really; it only happened to be d̶u̶m̶b̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶a̶ ̶b̶o̶x̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶S̶c̶o̶t̶t̶s̶ Scott McCall because d̶u̶m̶b̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶a̶ ̶b̶o̶x̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶S̶c̶o̶t̶t̶s̶ Scott McCall was simply… there.

Cookie: this is delightful, I love that I have become a person to come to about fandom salt because I have plenty of my own to add lol. 

I pretty much agree with all of this. The delusionals love to rant and rave about sterek/steter (or just non-Scott) fans misinterpreting canon/making up events that never happened, etc..... only to go and literally do exactly that. Peter is about as obsessed with Scott as Theo was in season 5... that is, not at all. He was just a useless obstacle that only got in the way, and caused more problems than he solved. True alpha, my ass. I stand by my belief that the fic Anthracite has the best take on the true alpha thing, but that’s neither here nor there. 

You know the saying “You pay more for convenience”? Yeah, that has never been more true than in this case. Scott was there, he was convenient, and Peter never really stopped paying for that mistake. People talk about Scott like he’s a goddamn five star restaurant with a year long waiting list, but he’s the McDonald’s of the werewolf world. They keeping upping their prices and thinking they’re better than they are (the obvious parallel being Scott and his ever increasing hypocritical views on killing) but that doesn’t make them anything special. 

Scott literally could not be less important to Peter’s arc and I think that’s what pisses the delusionals off the most. Because Scott is the main character! He’s the true alpha! Everyone’s life revolves around him! Except for Peter, who would honestly rather forget Scott exists, if only Scott would just stop getting into shit. Scott is like having a puppy around in the worst kind of way, and I think I’m qualified to make that statement with full sincerity as I am currently raising a 6 week old werewolf cub terror. 

For Peter, his entire arc basically centers around his family. As you said, Derek, Cora, and Malia. Stiles, who has done more for the Hale pack than Scott ever would, and Lydia, who I think Peter had an interesting connection to. If he should feel remorse towards anyone, it should be Lydia after everything he put her through, from biting her to invading her mind notice how I don’t use the term “mindrape”, delusionals? but do they acknowledge that? Of course not, because who cares about the girl that was literally, and ongoing, assaulted by Peter when Scott got bit that one time in the woods. 

Which, honestly, is my favorite part of their arguments. Scott going into the woods. They have no leg to stand on with that scene, and they know it, so they try to make it out as horrible as it can possibly be. But really? Scott and Stiles went out into the woods in the middle of the night. Again, the woods in the middle of the night. Anyone with half a brain knows that’s a terrible idea. Stiles also didn’t force Scott to do it. I would die for my best friend, but you can bet your life if she came to my house and tried to pull that shit I’d sooner tie her to a chair to keep her from getting eaten by something than go with her. 

As for Scott getting bitten by Peter. I’ve said it before and I’ve said it again: Scott got the equivalent of a bite from a rabid dog, and then he got superpowers. Clearly the bite itself wasn’t that bad, seeing as he didn’t even go to the hospital as far as I can remember? Correct me if I’m wrong, of course. But again, in Scott’s position, anyone with half a brain would have. That theory that Scott is smarter than Stiles and Lydia really doesn’t hold up, and this is all just from the first episode of the show. The truth is, Peter biting Scott is the best thing that ever happened to him. But that doesn’t garner sympathy, so they have to twist it around and make it some terrible burden (the delusionals and canon itself) when it really... isn’t? Everything Scott has, he has because of Peter. But Peter is the bad guy, so everything he does is tainted. The only way to keep that taint away from Pure Precious Scott is to make him sound as much like a victim as possible, even going so far as to invent things, when really... he just got a bad dog bite. The same kind he could easily get from being a vet. 

Not to downplay Scott’s other trauma, because there undoubtedly is some. All the characters have been through shit. But him getting bitten just really wasn’t one of the big ones. In fact, I would say it barely places. 

The only ones obsessed with Scott are the delusionals, so of course they can’t see Peter being anything less than foaming at the mouth when it comes to him. But really, for how much they scream about paying attention to canon, they really do seem to miss a lot, don’t they?

[argylemnwrites]

It Couldn’t Wait Another Moment - Chapter 6

Pairing: Drake Walker x MC (Riley Liu)

Book: The Royal Romance (Canon Divergent from Book 2, Chapter 15)

Word Count: ~5200

Rating: PG-13 (strong language, innuendo)

Summary: Drake continues to search for a job in New York while Riley settles in to her new bartending gig. Meanwhile, Madeleine had matters to discuss with Hana back in Cordonia.

Author’s Note: Sorry this is late! I was doing my final edits yesterday and realized I had to rework a massive section of this chapter. On the plus side, this means there will be a deleted scene I’ll clean up and put out this week that I rather liked, but just slowed down this chapter way too much.

This series diverges from TRR canon, where instead of waiting to discuss his relationship with Riley until their last night in NYC, leaving her a note while Liam is proposing to her, Drake tackles this topic as soon as possible after Tariq makes his statement and Riley’s name is cleared. To catch up on this series, you can find the rest of the chapters in my masterlist (link is located in my bio).

Smoothing any wrinkles out of her dress, Hana took a deep breath and entered the hospital room right behind Penelope and Kiara. The two guards stationed outside the door made it abundantly clear who occupied this particular room, in addition to the metal detector they had to pass through that had clearly been placed temporarily at the entrance to this unit. Once inside, the touches provided by the hospital staff to elevate the room were apparent. The flowers that had been sent were placed in a variety of actual glass vases, not plastic containers. The blankets on the bed appeared much newer and softer than standard hospital fare, plus they were a lovely grey color, much different from the faded blues and greens of the stacks of blankets on carts they had passed on their way in. Somehow, the smell of this room was much more pleasant than the hallways they’d passed through, as if candles or air fresheners had been provided.

Sitting up in the hospital bed, Madeleine had a table pulled over her lap, covered in numerous binders and sheets of paper. She looked good at first glance, her hair carefully styled in spite of the shapeless hospital gown she was wearing, but on closer inspection, Hana noticed some subtle signs of her recent trauma. She was definitely wearing more rouge than was typical for her, and as she shifted slightly to greet her visitors, she winced before covering her grimace with a smile. She was still connected to a bag of IV fluids, plus another medication pump that was locked.

“Madeleine, how are you?” asked Penelope, scampering away from Kiara and wrapping Madeleine in a hug, not noticing the grimace that crossed her face, clearly still in a large amount of pain.

“Just sit down. I called you all here to discuss some information.”

Hana joined Kiara in pulling over some chairs, settling in before Madeleine continued.

“So, Liam and I have discussed our response to this attack, and we both feel it is best that we postpone the wedding.”

Hana doubted that was entirely true. Based on the conversation she and Maxwell had with Liam yesterday, it definitely seemed like the postponement was coming from him. Additionally, with what she had observed about Madeleine, she highly questioned that she would really desire pushing back the ceremony that was the only thing standing between her and being officially crowned queen. Still, she kept her face solemn. If Madeleine wanted to play this development as being under her control, Hana knew better than to openly question that fact.

“Oh mon dieu,” replied Kiara.

“Honestly Kiara, it’s nothing. It simply makes the most sense. Regardless, I wanted my court aware of this decision so you can speak to the press intelligently and represent me well at the upcoming Five Kingdoms festival. I’m not sure if these so-called doctors will release me before then. I’ve told them I am perfectly fine, but they insist I am not cleared for discharge yet.”

At the mention of the festival, Kiara shifted slightly in her seat. “Madeleine, about the festival. I regret to tell you that I will not be able to attend.”

“Why the hell not?”

“In light of the recent attack, I’ve decided I should return home.”

“Really? You got a little scratch and you are running like a coward?”

Kiara dropped her eyes to her lap as Madeleine berated her. Hana felt for her. Getting stabbed in the shoulder, requiring several stitches, hardly seemed like a “scratch.” As Hana placed her hand soothingly on her shoulder, Penelope spoke up in her defense as well.

“She was stabbed! And we didn’t catch any of the assassins! Everyone is scared, Madeleine. In fact, I was going to tell you that I’m returning home as well.”

“Seriously?” Madeleine shook her head at both of them, sighing in disgust. “Fine, get out of here.”

Hana stood to leave with Penelope and Kiara, but Madeleine spoke out harshly.

“Not you, Hana.”

Penelope stopped in her tracks, turning back to Hana with wide eyes. She mouthed “sorry” before Kiara nudged her out of the room. Hana gently sat back down, this time taking the chair closest to Madeleine. She was unsure why Madeleine wanted to speak to her individually. Liam had already okayed her moving into the palace, at least temporarily, but it was possible that Madeleine objected for some reason. If she wasn’t able to stay in the palace, she wasn’t sure where she would go. Home was no longer really an option. In fact, she was shocked that she hadn’t been cut off by her parents completely at this point. Most likely, her father hadn’t entirely explained the situation to her mother yet, hoping that Hana would come back, begging for forgiveness.

Madeleine waited until the door was completely closed before she spoke again. “You’re really the only dependable one, aren’t you?”

Hana didn’t know how to respond other than to give a little smile. In response, Madeleine broke into a wide grin, more genuine-looking than any other expression that had ever graced her face, or at least the most genuine looking pleasant expression.

“Liam told me you asked him if you could move into the palace”

“I hope that won’t be a problem, Madeleine. I -”

“Of course not. I take care of those who are loyal to me. Wanting to be more accessible as a member of my court will never be a problem.”

Hana swallowed at that. Madeleine didn’t really believe that Hana was moving to the palace exclusively for her, did she? “Did Liam tell you why I need to move in?”

To Hana’s surprise, Madeleine continued to smile at her question, “I’m glad you brought this up. I heard you rejected Neville.”

This sent Hana’s mind racing. She had assumed Madeleine would be upset that she had so firmly ended things with Neville, given the emphasis she had placed on her ability to keep a suitor just weeks ago. Yet here she was, acting happy about this fact. “Yes, that is correct,” Hana eventually replied, choosing her phrasing cautiously.

“And you are not linked to Rashad at this time, are you?”

“I am not. Is that a problem?”

Madeleine paused for a moment, seeming to collect her thoughts before she started her answer. “They say certain things become clear when you go through something traumatic. The adrenaline puts everything in focus and what really matters is all you can see.”

Hana felt completely lost at this point. When Madeleine had summoned her court to the hospital, the last thing she expected to be doing was discussing near-death revelations one on one, but it was a nice alternative to her typical scorn and judgement. “Did that happen for you?”

“Not quite in such a saccharine fashion, but to a degree. Do you mind me asking why you rejected Neville?”

“He was so selfish and dull. I couldn’t see myself spending the rest of my life with him.”

Shockingly, Madeleine seemed to nod in agreement. “I understand the desire to have love and passion in your life. That much is clear to me now.”

“Is Madeleine thinking of calling off the wedding?” wondered Hana. She simply couldn’t imagine it happening, but with Madeleine saying all these things, it was the only thought that came to mind. Not wanting to upset Madeleine if her assumption was incorrect, Hana remained quiet, allowing Madeleine to continue when she was ready.

“Did Riley ever tell you about the proposal I brought to Liam, the one that guaranteed he chose me during the social season?”

Hana shook her head. Riley had never brought up any such topic. Of course, that was around the time Hana’s suspicions that something was happening between Drake and Riley really started, so she had focused more on observing their interactions than watching how Riley was with either Liam or Madeleine.

“I told Liam if he chose me, I didn’t care who he was involved with behind closed doors. He was welcome to invite anyone to his bedroom as long as he was discrete.”

Hana couldn’t help it; her jaw dropped in shock. Was Madeleine trying to arrange an affair for herself? Did she want Hana’s help in keeping some ongoing relationship a secret? Before Hana could fully process this turn of events, Madeleine continued on.

“I had thought he was a lovesick fool, following such a shallow drive, but I can better understand his desire to keep passion and romance in his life, regardless of his station. I feel the appeal more than ever.” With those words, Madeleine dropped her left hand down, reaching for Hana.

Hana’s hands started to shake. Surely, this wasn’t happening. There was no way Madeleine could be interested in her. She had been so cruel and harsh, actively working to make her life harder. Before Hana could collect her thoughts, Madeleine twined their fingers together and continued her speech.

“I know it isn’t an ideal situation, but I figure discretion will be easy enough when we are living under the same roof, and-”

“No,” said Hana, pulling her hand from Madeleine’s, rapidly standing and walking across the room to put some distance between them. The words slipped out a little louder than she intended, but at least she got her message across.

Madeleine’s eyes briefly widened in horror and her cheeks flushed bright red, but she quickly composed herself, her mouth curling into a stern scowl. “Oh, I guess I misunderstood. I thought you were attracted to women.”

Hana felt her cheeks growing warm at that comment, “I am.”

“Then what’s the problem? Is it that I’m with Liam? That means nothing to me, and quite frankly, you are going to need to get used to some degree of freedom in relationships if you intend to marry within the Cordonian nobility-”

“I will not be your mistress, Madeleine,” Hana interrupted. “Whatever arrangement you have with Liam is your business, just as any such arrangements between any other nobles are between the parties involved, but I will never consent to such a relationship. I don’t care if it’s old-fashioned, but I will never be with any man or woman who doesn’t love me enough to commit to me and me alone.”

“God, you’re such a child, like you’re waiting around for some fairy tale romance,” sneered Madeleine.

“Maybe I am naive, but over the past few months I’ve learned that I can make my life what I want it to be, not what you or anyone else tells me it needs to be. And I have no interest in being a dirty little secret, hidden away for shameful moments, particularly with someone who took pleasure in my pain and looks down on me even as she tries to start a relationship with me. I am worth more than that.”

A tense silence settled over the room for a few seconds. Madeleine’s lips were pinched tightly, and she was blinking rapidly, a slight wetness visible. After a moment, she responded, “If you’re quite finished, Lady Hana, I think it’s time for you to go,” a slight shake evident behind in her voice.

Hana nodded, walking briskly to the door without a glance back. It wasn’t until she was at the elevator that she let out the breath she hadn’t even realized she’d been holding. She fumbled past her wallet, compact, and lipstick, attempting to grab her phone out of her purse with trembling hands. Eventually, she managed to access her contact list and select the name she needed to talk to most in this moment. After several rings, she answered.

“Hey, Hana. Just one second okay?”

In the background, Hana heard lots of rustling and Riley’s muffled voice. After a few seconds, she came back, “Sorry about that, Anderson and I were on a walk and he did not want to come back inside. How are you?”

“Okay, I think. I just had the most surreal conversation with Madeleine.” Hana began to explain her meeting with Madeleine, but she hadn’t even gotten past the discussion of Neville when Riley interrupted her.

“Sorry, I was in the elevator and you kept cutting out. All I got was something about a festival and Kiara and Neville.”

“Should I call back later?”

“No, no, no. I want to talk to you. Lemme just put you on speaker while I get dressed for work.”

Hana sighed. It was clearly a bad time for Riley, “That’s okay. I’ll give you a call later.”

“You sure?”

“Positive. Have a good time at work.”

Taking a deep breath, Hana kept her calm, remembering she was still in public. Still, she was overwhelmed by everything that had happened over the past 30 minutes, and she really wanted to talk to her best friend. Unfortunately, that was not an option right now, and realistically, she needed to find a place to stay since she had a feeling Madeleine was not going to be so welcoming at the palace after everything that just transpired.

Resigning herself to the fact that she was going to have to be a bit of a stray kitten, at least temporarily, she followed her instinct, scrolling to another name in the phone. This contact answered his phone right away.

“Hana-banana! How’s Madeleine doing?” said Maxwell.

“Physically fine, but I don’t think I’m on good terms with her anymore. Can I stay with you and Bertrand for a little bit while I figure some things out?”

“Of course! Let me come get you, and you can tell me all about what the she-devil did.”

Hana smiled. Maxwell Beaumont was many things, and thankfully, adorably reliable was one of them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Drake took a bite of the BLT in front of him. The bacon was flavorful, the lettuce crisp, and the bread perfectly toasted. It was just what he needed. “Thanks, George.”

“Of course. How’s the job hunt?”

Drake shrugged. It had been over a week since the attack at the Homecoming Ball, and most days he’d eaten lunch at that same diner, getting to know the owner, George, a bit in the process. What could he say, he felt comfortable in this greasy spoon, hole in the wall type of place. Plus George’s food was good, old-fashioned comfort food.

Drake was in need of comfort. To say that his job search was going poorly was an understatement. He was told over and over again that he was overqualified for the entry level office positions, but it was rare when he was even asked for an interview for any of the higher level postings. He was sure his lack of college degree hurt him, but when he did get a rare interview, it was clear he wasn’t giving a good impression. He never had been good at ass-kissing, but at court, all he had to endure was a snide comment and a sneer. Here, his lack of sucking up meant that no one was going to hire him.

He’d expanded his job search to other fields, but that hadn’t really improved his luck at all. He’d gotten a couple of interviews at retail stores and restaurants, but he couldn’t keep up a friendly, smiling act for even the length of the interview. Construction and repair jobs wouldn’t touch him without formal experience it seemed. He looked into a customer service call center, but Riley urged him not to take that job, telling him that he would end up killing someone if he had to listen to people whine while somehow staying pleasant all day long.

“Trust me, I only stomached about 5 weeks at one of those call centers a few years ago,” she had said. “If you thought court was bad, just wait until some asshole doesn’t even have to look you in the eye when they call you every name they can imagine.”

Drake was starting to get concerned about money. New York was expensive, and a sizeable portion of his savings had gone to their rental, which had cost a crap ton considering they had needed a pet-friendly apartment in less than 24 hours, and Drake had drawn the line at sharing a unit with other random travelers. He didn’t care if Riley swore up and down that she had stayed in hostels a various points when she was between places. That might be fine when you’re young and taking holiday during university, but he was way too close to 30 to be considering something like that.

They were moving back to Riley’s apartment tomorrow, and while the the price per day would be lower, her place still cost about $2000 per month. And that didn’t include the utilities or anything. She had repeatedly told him not to worry about money. She was apparently making boatloads in tips at the bar and she kept insisting they would be okay on just her income until he found a job. But Drake already knew he would be cutting into his savings even more to make sure he was at least covering his share.

It made Drake feel like shit that he was barely able to cover his own food with the money he had earned since the move. He wanted to take care of Riley, and maybe that made him sexist or old-fashioned, but it just didn’t feel right being a burden to the woman he loved. He was able-bodied and should be able to contribute. But all he had so far were his TaskRabbit jobs.

He really had to thank Sam for getting him set up on TaskRabbit. Sam was George’s former daughter-in-law who worked in the kitchen over the lunch and dinner rush on weekdays. The dynamic between her and George had confused Drake when he found out that she had divorced George’s son, Nick, a few years earlier.

“Wait, so you hired her after she left your son?” Drake asked a few days ago, after Sam left for a doctor’s appointment.

“Well, for one, I hired her when she was still married to my son. I just didn’t fire her when she divorced him. She’s a good cook, and I still like her.”

“Doesn’t that make things awkward with your kid?”

“Well, if he wanted to keep things from getting awkward, he shouldn’t have cheated on her. Look, Drake, I love my son, but he’s a bit of an impulsive idiot. Sam is sharp, hard-working, and damn good in my kitchen. I still love her like a daughter, even if Nicky shot that all to hell.”

And that was that. Drake liked both of them, so who was he to judge if they found a dynamic that worked for them. Sam was a direct straight-shooter. She claimed that the pregnancy hormones made her more blunt than usual, but Drake got the sense that she always called things as she saw them, and that all the pregnancy had done was reduce her tolerance for bullshit. George was quieter, but he had a gruff no-nonsense approach to life that Drake appreciated. He supposed that was another reason why he kept coming back to this diner. Not only did he like the atmosphere and the food, but he liked the people, too.

These days, Drake had fallen into an awkward routine. Mornings were for interviews or searching for jobs online. Then, it was to George’s diner for a late lunch. He usually hung out there in the afternoon, taking tasks at the nearby office towers as they came in. He had quickly found that putting up shelves or putting together an Uskea desk was an easy way to make some money, and all these white collar workers were in such a hurry, they often threw him some extra cash for his quick arrival. Then it was home to feed and walk Anderson before he cooked dinner for himself, putting the leftovers away for Riley for when she got off work. Some nights he had found a couple of nearby tasks at night, loading boxes for a move or putting together a dresser, something like that. By the end of the night, he’d head down to the bar, waiting for Riley to finish up before walking her home.

Riley had rolled her eyes the first night when he had showed up a little before the end of her shift, telling him that she was capable of getting home on her own, but the thought of her alone so late just made him nervous. Maybe it would be better when they were living at Riley’s place and the bar was only a few blocks away, but for now, he just wanted to make sure she was safe.

“How do you think I managed before I met you?” she’d challenged him one night.

“Just because you can do something on your own, doesn’t mean you should have to, Liu.”

Regardless of her protests, Drake had been coming to the bar earlier and earlier. Mainly, it was a nice way to spend some time with her. Their schedules didn’t exactly line up the greatest, with Drake waking up early to hit the job trail, and Riley not getting off work until after midnight. Drake supposed it was he should be grateful that she usually didn’t have to close out the bar. The other new bartender had a kid to pick up from school, so she was glad to take the later shift most days if Riley was able to be there in the afternoon. The only times Riley really had to stay until bar close was when she worked the weekend. She and the other new hire had decided on alternating pairs of Friday and Saturday nights, and Riley had been the one who worked last weekend.

Given that there wasn’t going to be much Drake could do for job hunting over the weekend, he’d stayed with her until closing time last weekend. The weekends were obviously much busier than the weeknights, but Riley was impressively efficient, pouring drinks while still charming all the customers. Eventually, the crowd thinned as the night wore on, either heading home, some by themselves and others with a new partner, or moving on to clubs where they could mix their alcohol with dancing. It had been rather nice last Friday, as the only table left for the last couple of hours before bar close was a group of middle aged women celebrating a birthday. They just needed a new bottle of wine every so often, leaving Riley largely free to chat with him. Saturday ended with a couple of drunk men who required a lot more attention, but as Riley pointed out, that meant better tips. Plus, it had been pretty damn satisfying to leave with her after they had been hitting on her for hours.

This weekend, though, was going to be different. Riley was off both tonight and tomorrow night, and with no interviews over the weekend, they were planning on having a real date. It was odd to think that they had moved in together without ever actually going on a date. Drake had never lived with a woman before, but this certainly felt like a backwards order of doing things.

He knew he should probably see if there were any quick tasks he could knock out to earn some money, but thinking about Riley made him just want to head back to their rental. She hadn’t been awake when he left this morning, and as cheesy as it sounded, he missed her. Just talking to her, laughing at her jokes, that sort of thing. There had been plenty of down time on the engagement tour where they had talked about anything from the serious to the stupidly silly for hours on end. He missed that.

Pulling out his wallet, he grabbed the bills he needed for his sandwich, but it took a few minutes for George to make it over to him. Sam wasn’t here today, and George was struggling to keep up with the lunch rush. When Drake handed him his money, he asked, “Another doctor’s appointment for Sam?” but George shook his head as he began clearing away Drake’s dishes.

“No, she had the baby last night.”

“I thought she wasn’t due until next month?”

“Yeah, six weeks early. Made me mad nervous, but she and Jesse called this morning and said he’s doing real good and breathing on his own just fine.”

“Well, congratulations.”

“Thanks. Of course, the cook we hired for her maternity leave isn’t available for six weeks.”

“Damn.”

“Yeah, so if you know anyone who knows their way around a kitchen, send ‘em to me.”

“Seriously? Because I can cook.”

George stopped wiping the counter, squinting up at Drake. After a few seconds, he asked, “What kind of cooking are you talking about?”

“This kind of cooking. Nothing fancy, just good, filling food.”

“But no restaurant experience, right?”

“No, but I’m a hard worker.”

“I’m sure you are, son,” he said, pausing for several moments before he continued, “If we do this, it’d only be for Sam’s maternity leave. I don’t need anyone long term.”

“I know.”

“And if it isn’t working out, either one of us can call it off, no questions.”

“Fair enough.”

“Okay, I’ll see you Monday at 10,” said George, sticking out his hand. Drake shook it eagerly. He knew he probably should get something in writing about his hours or his wages, but he was too excited to care. He trusted George not to screw him over, plus this felt like a way better fit for him than any of his dozens of interviews. For once, something about New York that wasn’t named Riley Liu felt right.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So, clearly you hustled me last time we played.”

Riley laughed before she called her pocket for the eight ball, sinking it with ease. “You just assumed I had no idea what I was doing. I didn’t bother to correct you.”

“You just ran the table on me.”

“Well, you’re good at pool, too. I couldn’t risk you winning by giving you a chance. See, unlike you, I take my opponents seriously.”

Drake rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Believe me, I take you plenty seriously, Liu.”

She smirked at that response, moving to rack the balls for another game when a pair of hands came to rest on her hips. She spun around to face Drake, looping her arms around his neck. “Don’t you want to play another game, see if you can avoid total embarrassment?”

Drake shook his head, before he dropped his lips to her ear, “All I really want to do is get you naked.” Suddenly, the heat that had been building between them reached the breaking point.

Drake had been nearly giddy tonight, his good mood completely infectious in a total role reversal for them. Starting when he bounded into the Airbnb in the afternoon, announcing that he had found a job, he had been smiling nearly nonstop. Riley knew that his job hunt had been going terribly, a fact which clearly weighed on him. In fact, Riley had wondered if his inability to find employment was part of the reason he hadn’t gone back to Cordonia.

In the initial days after the attack at the Ball, Riley had asked Drake if he planned to go and visit Liam, but he had said no without much of an explanation. Sure, he had talked to Liam or Bastien almost everyday, but Riley had been sure he would want to see them in person. She couldn’t help but wonder if he was self-conscious about his lack of a job, causing him to avoid returning to Cordonia. She couldn’t think of any other explanation. She had made sure to tell him she understood if he wanted to go, so it wasn’t likely that he was staying for her sake, unless he could sense her reluctance for him to leave. Regardless, the selfish part of her was glad he wasn’t headed to a different country, even as the rest of her worried about his avoidance of his former home.

Given how everything had been weighing on him, Riley was thrilled he found work he was happy about. She had been worried that his job hunting stress was going to put a damper on their first real date, but the timing had worked out perfectly. The entire evening had been excellent, starting with pizza and beer before they had headed to one of Riley’s favorite dive bars. They had been drinking and talking for hours, and Riley was pleasantly buzzed when Drake had spotted the pool table in the back, challenging her to a rematch of their game in Paris. Given their mutual memories of that night, of everything they had wanted to do, but couldn’t back then, it wasn’t surprising that it had only taken one game before they were both scrambling to get out of there to somewhere they could turn those fantasies to reality.

It was torture getting home. It was late enough that they had to contend with subway maintenance, so they waited for at least twenty minutes for their train. Riley was about to suggest getting a Dryve when they finally heard the train coming down the track. They had been contenting themselves with little touches and light kisses, but as they settled in to their seats, Drake grew bolder, less patient, letting his hand slide between her legs and slowly creeping upward. Thankfully, they only had a few stops, or Riley is sure they would have completely scandalized the middle aged couple seated a few rows away from them.

By the time they reached their building, it was a miracle they made it into the elevator before they were kissing. Riley barely registered her back hitting the wall as she tugged Drake down, sliding her fingers through his hair. The buzz from the alcohol hadn’t completely worn off, and it was enhancing everything with a warm, pleasant glow. Both their hands were everywhere, grabbing at each other, sliding under clothing. The kisses were rough, biting and demanding. He ground his hips against her as he pushed her further against the wall, only to tug her after him when the bell finally dinged, signaling that they had reached the 18th floor.

It took them longer than it should have to reach their door, and unlocking it was a struggle as Drake was working his mouth down her neck as he stood behind her, arms wrapped tightly around her waist. Finally, they stumbled through the door, only to be greeted by Anderson, tail wagging as he happily trotted over to them. Riley sighed as Drake let out a groan before reaching for the leash they had left by the door.

“I’ll take him around the block. When I get back, I expect you to be naked in bed,” he said, dropping one last kiss to her forehead before he grabbed the dog and turned toward the door.

Riley smiled as she watched them leave. They had waited so long for this first date, what was waiting 10 more minutes?

Tags: @wickedgypsymoon @thesumofmychoices​ @cosigottahavefaith​ @thequeenofcronuts​ @thequeenchoices​ @katedrakeohd​ @carabeth​ @feartheendlesssummer

[eponymous-rose]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E21 (June 5, 2018)

Buckle up, keep your arms and legs inside the ride at all times... and for the love of everything you hold dear, don’t read the chat. Tonight’s guests are Marisha Ray and Liam O’Brien!

The episode starts with Marisha and Liam fighting over a bowl and then hugging. Brian: “Wait, it was that kind of bowl?”

F̩̤̹̹̞̳j̣͓̝o̶̖͍r̙͚̝̹̪͙͔͘d̪̭͎̮̞͜ ͉̤̕��͇̦̗b̸͈̳̥̻̳̤̼u̺͔̩̻͚͍s̘͞t͎̼̺̜͉̝̞ ̣͉̯̤s҉͖̯͖ee̜͙̤͕͓̺s ͙̳̘͍̪̳́a͓͓͞l̫̻l҉̩̖̬̰͉̬.̝̖̙͔

Announcements: Vox Machina comic is still on sale, including the limited edition! Winners of fanart of the week will now be hosted on critrole.com! New Instagram account!

@critrolestats​ for this episode: This is the first episode of the new campaign to surpass 4 hours of gameplay (4:07:27); Beau got her 30th Nat 20 in this episode and continues to have the most Nat 20s, with Nott in a distant second place with 19; the Mighty Nein rolled their 100th Nat 20 in this episode (Fjord’s concentration save for Hunger of Hadar); Nott and Beau are tied for the most Nat 1s with 18 each, and Caleb ranks third with 14.

Of all the great stuff in the D&D Beyond ad spot, Liam was least surprised by Sam’s singing, because he knew he had the a capella chops to pull it off; he and Marisha got teary-eyed watching it the first time because of animation style nostalgia (it especially reminded them of Thundercats).

Beau is deeply enjoying having a friend in Jester, especially since she doesn’t seem to question Beau for who she is. “For Beau, it’s like appreciating an adorable little flower.”

Everyone was enamored with Mark and Cali. Marisha: “I loved how cute he was, his appreciation for cute things.” They’re going to try to Skype Mark in on Talks next week to see what his side of the experience was. Brian: “Probably horrible.”

Beau isn’t likely to be too dramatically changed by her near-death experience. "I think Beau was unconscious and then Beau was woken up and was like, ‘This is fine. This is normal, right?’” Marisha talks about how it would’ve been a huge bummer as a player to lose Beau before her backstory even came out.

There’s some speculation as to how long this campaign might be. Liam: “Could be shorter, could be 852 episodes like Naruto.”

Caleb’s passing around of Frumpkin is his main outlet for expressing affection; Frumpkin’s deep importance to him and the significance of handing him off to someone else for even a brief period of time will become more clear with future reveals.

Beau doesn’t think she’s immortal, but she still has the youthful perspective that risk-taking will probably work out. “It’s not that she thinks consequences can’t happen to her, it’s that she thinks they won’t.” Marisha points out that Beau wouldn’t really know how close it came since she was unconscious for most of it.

Gif of the week: Jester casting Speak with Dead and everyone freaking out.

Caleb knows Nott’s laying it on way too thick when it comes to his magical abilities, but he doesn’t want to call her out on it, because he’d feel a bit hypocritical pointing out someone else’s irrational behavior. "Caleb hates himself. Nothing gets through that wall.”

Apart from Caleb, Frumpkin is most comfortable with Nott, despite Nott "eating” Frumpkin twice. After Nott, it’s Jester. Liam: “Laura would kill me if I don’t say Jester.” Marisha: “I thought you’d say Yasha.” Liam: “I was going to say that, but Laura would kill me.”

Beau’s still processing how she feels about not getting left behind despite her worldview that everyone’s basically selfish; she wouldn’t have begrudged them leaving her behind (even if she weren’t dead in that scenario). Once again, it’s hard to reconcile because the players all know how close she was to dying, but that’s not really reflected in the game’s universe (she didn’t even have to roll saving throws; she was just out for a few seconds). Beau knows it was Cali who saved her, because she knows Cali has Levitation.

The parallel between Cali and Caleb’s backstories was most influential earlier, when Caleb warmed to her faster than he might’ve otherwise, but didn’t have much time to percolate and didn’t factor into his actions at the end of the episode.

Fanart of the week: a spectacular Mollymauk!

Beau saw Caleb’s actions as him being cautious, and that was fair and warranted and justified, and Beau knows that more than anybody else (along with Nott), considering she has the peek into his backstory. From Beau and the rest of the Mighty Nine’s perspective, they didn’t see the conversation between Nott and Caleb, and when it came down to it, in Beau’s eyes, having this thing that’s this potentially horrific artifact on their person when they already have the dodecahedron was just going to bring trouble down on them. Marisha: “This isn’t our jam, and if Cali is telling the truth and she is going to destroy this, great! Bonus points for us! If she is lying to us and she does want to go out and talk to Tiamat, I think, in Beau’s head, that’s another adventuring party’s problem. That’s above our payscale. That’s not why we’re here.” As a member of the Cobalt Reserve, she knows exactly how bad this kind of stuff can be. “What are we going to do, go around intercepting every potentially dangerous item that doesn’t have anything to do with us?” She emphasizes that Beau’s not a hero yet and doesn’t have that mindset. “I’m not saying it’s the right choice or the wrong choice, but it’s the character choice. (...) What she was trying to tell Caleb is ‘You had no knowledge that this bowl even fucking existed before Cali came along.’ Beyond that, she was going to go along with it until Caleb suggested holding Cali overnight. Due to stuff that Beau has dealt with in her backstory that unfortunately no one knows about yet” she wasn’t going to let that fly.

Brian talks about how much he admires that Marisha is willing to make bold character choices, especially after so many folks have seemed to enjoy attempting to tear her down for it. “That’s fucking awesome. You’re going to own the shit out of that character.”

Liam: “I want to toss out three ideas about all this, because obviously there’s been a lot of discussion about this, a lot of passion and debate. (...) One, I encourage everyone who watches our show to watch Rashomon. Something happens in the woods, and the movie is three different people telling their account of what happened out in the woods, and every story is totally different. Different people are the hero or the villain depending on who’s telling it. The other thing is that I know that VM was more of a family, and this clusterfuck of a-holes is not. This is not a Sunday School Bible parable class, we’re not an afterschool special, this is a character study of a lot of really messed-up people.” They might end up being role models, but it’s an ongoing arc. “And then the last thing is, this is a game of D&D. If Caleb can’t decide to have a moment, if Beau can’t grab the bowl, what’s the point of Dungeons and Dragons? I don’t care what gripe Caleb and Beau had together. I live in Caleb’s skin, so of course I associate and feel passionate about Caleb’s point of view, but it’s not the only point of view. The point is not to be right, the point is to have fun and get into it.”

Marisha: “I think ‘character study’ is the right way of putting it. We’re uppity actor types. We like making complex characters, and we want to explore that and see what these complex characters do, because people are complex, people are complicated. You hear a lot of people complaining about contradictions. I mean, yeah, have you ever had a Facebook post pop up from two years ago like, ‘Remember when you said this two years ago, you dumb shit?’ You’re allowed to be upset at our characters, and you should, and I think that’s why we as actors have jumped into this profession, is because we like making people feel things.”

Brian paraphrases Melville: “A great moment is about the opposite of what it appears to be about.” He points out that this wasn’t about a bowl, it was about what was in the rearview mirror for both characters. “Ultimately, it’s the stuff that brings you guys closer together.” He talks about how it’s probably harder for viewers to watch that after Vox Machina, given that they were more in the flawed-but-noble vein as characters.

Liam: “Caleb is trying to make good with the group and (laughs) is not doing a good job of it. He obviously saw the extreme parallel between [his and Cali’s] backgrounds. Because of the things that she was dealing with, he put on a different pair of sunglasses to watch her and make sure everything was fine.” At the end, even Caleb knew it was probably over-the-top, but he’d found out this thing and was awkwardly trying to communicate that to the rest of the group. “Caleb thinks that he’s a broken bag of glass that everybody doesn’t want to touch, and he’s right.” Even in a moment when he thought he was doing what the group wanted, he couldn’t do it right. “He’s been in a fucking asylum for eleven years.” In the moment, in his mind, he didn’t think his trauma had anything to do with his actions, and didn’t understand why that was being brought into it, and just disengaged. “Another thing with Caleb is that he doesn’t need, in this group, to feel like people respect him or think he’s cool; Caleb thinks that he is a piece of shit, so this is just confirming what he unconsciously wants. All he needs to do is learn more and grow, so if he needs to just shut up and deal with it, as long as they’ll keep him around, fine, because he just needs things that he hasn’t had access to for five years.” He’s getting what he wants out of this group: he’s getting that unconscious need to be told he’s a fuck-up.

Liam on Beau: “She is talking from her experience, she has nothing to do with what happened to him, she is not responsible for him, he doesn’t want pity from anyone, he barely knows how to accept what Nott is doing. So everyone get off her back. Caleb is where he wants to be, which is moving towards his goal.”

Caleb’s latest actions were too similar to someone with authority that Beau had trouble with in the past. Beau bringing up Caleb’s trauma was speaking directly to that point, which she and Liam have since talked about offscreen.

Marisha doesn’t think at all that this has destroyed Beau and Caleb’s relationship beyond the point of no return: “I don’t think that’s how conflicts between friends work. Honestly, I was stoked after all this, because I thought this was a breaking point that maybe we were all waiting for.” She also thinks it opens up an organic way to bring Beau’s backstory into the limelight, and she thinks having some of this out in the open will bring the group closer together. It’s tough for her to analyze that episode because nobody has all the information behind Beau’s reasoning yet. Brian points out that it can be really refreshing to be surrounded by people who call you out on your bullshit. “Those moments create respect.” Liam mentions that there is no friendship yet, because they haven’t known each other that long, but that this confrontration could be the beginning of a real friendship between Caleb and Beau. Marisha points out that it’s very much “I wouldn’t get mad at you if I didn’t care.”

Marisha mentions that she’s used to being cautious where she treads on the internet after an episode like this, but “if you’re upset at Caleb or you’re upset at Beau or you’re upset at Fjord for holding the sword to Caleb’s throat, I think art and acting and media and these stories are there to teach us about ourselves, and why we get these emotions towards these certain things. Liam and I have been talking all weekend about how fascinating the Team Beau vs. Team Caleb discussions have been.” Liam: “It can only come from people being deeply invested.” Marisha: “They care. And we’re truly blessed to be a part of something that people feel that passionately about.” 

Brian: “There’s a difference between a conversation and lashing out between the actors.” Liam: “Just know that we’re playing strange people on purpose.”

Talks Machina After Dark (It’s Machine-a)

Oh.

Oh no.

Oh dear.

Marisha talks about how fun it can be to experience DMs who aren’t Matt, because at this point they all fall into the habit of trying to over-analyze his tells. “In my opinion, different DMs are like different teachers. Each one teaches me a different thing, and I love it.”

Marisha does her accent from the Stream of Many Eyes. Liam: “Casting director Liam is listening.” Marisha: “Oh, God! No! I’ll never work again!”

Liam and Marisha talk about how essential it is that they (and the rest of the cast) know each other so well and trust each other so much, so they can play out and explore those conflicts safely. Marisha: “There isn’t necessarily supposed to be comfort in conflict. It’s not going to be comfortable. I think it does take a more experienced roleplayer to make sure they can tread those waters safely, because there is care, and you do have to have personal care and after-care.” The two of them checked in afterwards, and all of them have been doing so since the first campaign to make sure they’re on the same page and feeling okay about what happens on-screen.

Liam talks about how embracing failure goes beyond rolling 1s or having bad things happen to characters. He legitimately was not paying attention when he nearly cast the spell that would’ve killed Beau, and appreciates that there’s enough of a rehearsal feel in the game to allow for those imperfections when they do arise. Marisha: “Yeah, thanks for not killing me, man.” Liam, deadpan: “It’ll happen.”

Swoleregard. Jumbeau. Beaulossus. Beaugantic. Dani: “Beauyasha.” Liam: “That’s a different thing. That’s not my job, to worry about that.” Dani: “It’s my job.”

Caleb is terrible at accents, terrible at impressions, terrible at musical impressions, but okay at singing (because he speaks Celestial). Marisha: “I think Beau would be full-on drumline.”

When they were going into a show for the stream this weekend, the whole audience broke into the D&D Beyond theme song. Marisha: “It was... it was so surreal.” Liam talks about how he keeps starting to sing it without thinking, then inevitably segues into another Sam song that goes “put your finger in my butt”.

[pagerunner-j]

Can I ask what your opinions are about the "situation at large" re: Caleb, Liam, and Molly's death?

The shortest (and admittedly snarkiest) version possible: I’ve disliked the character of Caleb from day one for being such an ongoing exercise in self-absorption and for trying that damn hard to be the gold medalist of the Top My Trauma Olympics. So watching him pull focus again at that moment was not what I was hoping for, I gotta admit. I mean, I GET his reaction, in character. It makes sense! It’s just not the lens I wanted to have to view that moment through, when there were things about that scenario way more important to me. Like the people in the next damn room.

Tagging for filtering purposes and because, again, I guess, fuck it, and with that I’m not really going to comment on this again for a while. I’d prefer no one reblog it, though. Not looking for an extended discussion.

[rightsinexile]

Publications

Global

A set of political and media-validated scripts play out to inform Western assumptions of what a refugee is and that excludes the “non-deserving.” The construction of “the refugee” as a “forced” “non-Western” object without will or socio-cultural history, to be rescued by the benevolent West is the central point of overlap between racialization and refuge in the contempo­rary context of refugee reception. Each of the articles featured in this special issue grapples with what the authors refer to as the “Racialized Refugee Regime.” “Race” is not thought of as a discrete variable for consideration but as part of an embedded structure of oppression in which the racialized refugee regime is generated and reproduced. - Introduction: The racialized refugee regime. Christopher Kyriakides, Dina Taha, Carlo Handy Charles and Rodolfo Torres. 2019.

This paper aims to contribute to the reflection on effective practices to address protracted displacement, in support of the GP20 Plan of Action roll-out. It expands on the research conducted by Walter Kälin and Hannah Entwisle Chapuisat for the 2017 OCHA-commissioned study Breaking the Impasse: Reducing Protracted Internal Displacement as a Collective Outcome. That study provided a comprehensive picture of the impact of protracted internal displacement, as well as five country case studies in contexts of conflict and disasters.It also offered a road map for addressing such displacement through seven steps, including conducting joint analysis and defining collective outcomes. - Reducing protracted internal displacement: A snapshot of successful humanitarian-development initiatives. OCHA policy and studies series. June 2019.

New estimates from the World Health Organization (WHO) highlight the need for increased, sustained investment in the development of mental health services in areas affected by conflict. - The Lancet: One in five people living in an area affected by conflict has a mental health condition. EurekAlert. 11 June 2019.

Africa

Displacement continues to drive high assistance needs with 4.1 million refugees in the region - 25% of the total global refugee population. South Sudan and Burundi are the main sources of origin for refugees in ESA, while Uganda, Ethiopia, Angola, Tanzania and Rwanda are the main host countries. Armed conflict and political instability in South Sudan, Burundi and the DRC has led to growing humanitarian needs for children and their families, who have been forced to flee into neighbouring countries. Almost 60 percent of the refugee population are children across the region. - UNICEF Eastern and Southern Africa Regional Humanitarian Situation Report - Quarter 1, 2019. UNICEF. 24 May 2019.

LIBYA

Libya is still so dangerous that the International Detention Coalition staff members can’t travel there – as a small international NGO, they can’t get insurance to work there, as most governments advise against all but the most essential travel.  So in February, they travelled to Tunis instead to run a six-day training session for a group of Libyan and sub-Saharan African humanitarian professionals. The participants are working on the ground everyday in Libyan detention centres, and represent various United Nations agencies and aid organisations. - On the ground in Libya: Implementing alternatives to detention. Jerome Phelps. International Detention Coalition. 6 June 2019. 

SOUTH SUDAN

The proportion of food insecure people as projected for May-July 2019 is the highest ever and the food insecurity situation is driven by household food shortages that are typical of a lean season, but have been exacerbated by delayed rainfall, the persistent macro-economic crisis, population displacements, additional needs from returnees, prolonged years of asset depletion, and the generally eroded livelihoods due to continued years of conflict – all of which continue to compromise a majority of the households’ capacity to access enough food during the ongoing lean season. - IPS acute food insecurity and acute malnutrition analysis: South Sudan. IPC. 14 June 2019. 

SUDAN

While Sudan has not currently rolled out the Comprehensive Refugee Response Framework (CRRF), the strategy for out-of-camp assistance which follows a similar approach: It has an aim towards improved humanitarian development “nexus” approaches to support in addressing the additional demand on existing services in refugee hosting areas. This is guided by UNHCR’s country-level inter-agency “out-of-camp” paper, finalized in October 2017. The paper emphasizes the need to avoid establishing parallel systems, and seeking instead to enhance the capacity of local services and existing public facilities, as well as self-reliance through livelihoods and promoting refugee access to income generating initiatives. - Sudan refugee response plan for South Sudanese: January 2019 - December 2020. UNHCR. 3 May 2019.

Nearly 65% of refugees in Sudan are children. Many experience trauma prior to and during their journey to Sudan, putting children at higher risk of abuse, exploitation and violence. - Fast fact Sudan. UNICEF. May 2019.

Americas

CANADA

This paper is a companion piece to the report, Making Social Housing Friendly for Resettling Refugees. It aims to understand the relationships between cost of housing, suitability of housing, and the resettlement process. In many respects, the parameters and conditions of resettlement vary from family to family and individual to individual. However, for many former refugees, resettlement trajectories will involve important considerations like employment, social supports, acculturation, family reunification, language acquisition, education and employment training, establishing new forms of community, and providing care for self and family (including family that remains overseas). This paper includes the accounts of nine interviewees who have desired to have, applied for, or attained social housing. - Resettling refugees' social housing stories. Ray Silvius, Hani Al-ubeady and Emily Halldorson. The Canadian Centre for Policy Alternatives. June 2019.

US

By forcing a vulnerable population to return to a hostile territory where they are likely to face persecution, the Migrant Protection Protocols abandons our tradition of providing a safe haven to the persecuted and violates our international and domestic legal obligations. Moreover, the MPP is entirely unnecessary, as our immigration system has the foundation and agility necessary to deal with the flow of migrants through our Southern Border. - Brief of Amicus Curiae Local 1924 in support of Plaintiffs-Appellees’ answering brief and affirmance of the district court’s decision. US Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit. 26 June 2019.

Temporary Protected Status (TPS) has been a lifeline to hundreds of thousands of individuals already in the United States when problems in a home country make their departure or deportation untenable. This fact sheet provides an overview of how TPS designations are determined, what benefits TPS confers, and how TPS beneficiaries apply for and regularly renew their status. - Temporary Protected Status: An overview. American Immigration Council. 21 May 2019.

This special issue considers critical questions about displacement, resistance, and bordering practices throughout the region. What is innovative about the framing of this special issue is the cross-regional approach to the study of borders, and the transversal connections it draws across indigenous and migration studies. While the individual authors in this special issue address specific bordering practices, the goal in this introduction is to bring them into discussion. This special issue aims to contribute to broader theoretical and practical debates about border control policies, bordering practices, and indigenous and migrant rights advocacy. - Dis/placing the borders of North America.  Julie Young, Johanna Reynolds and Peter Nyers. International Journal on Migration and Border Studies. 2019.

In a survey released 12 June 2019, the Center for Migration Studies of New York (CMS) analyzes the impact of Trump administration policies on faith-based organizations (FBOs). While countless media reports have documented the effect of Trump-era policies on immigrants and refugees, CMS’s Federal Enforcement Effect Research (FEER) Survey is notable because it provides the perspective of immigrant-serving FBOs, in this case diverse Catholic institutions, programs, and ministries. - The effect of US immigration and refugee policies on faith-based organizations. Center for Migration Studies. 12 June 2019.

This report explores how social innovation in the field of refugee inclusion has evolved in the three years since the peak of the crisis. Given the successes and limitations of different initiatives thus far, it asks the question: what can social enterprises, funding bodies, and policymakers do to maintain the momentum and turn promising initiatives into broader system change? -Social innovation for refugee inclusion: From bright spots to system change. Liam Patuzzi, Meghan Benton and Alexandra Embiricos. Migration Policy Institute. June 2019

Since its creation, the contemporary immigration court system has been perpetually afflicted by dysfunction. Today, under the Trump administration, the immigration court system - a system whose important work is vital for our nation's collective prosperity - has effectively collapsed. This report explains how the collapse came to be and why the immigration court system cannot be salvaged in its current form. Decades of experience incontrovertibly demonstrate that the immigration courts have never worked and will never work to, as Chief Justice John Roberts says, “do equal right” to those who appear before them. - The Attorney General’s judges: How the US immigration courts became a deportation tool. Innovative Lab and Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC). June 2019.

In summary, the research shows that US Border Patrol agents and other CBP officers abuse migrants, physically and verbally, with significant frequency. In addition, many resent immigrants in general, and display racism toward Mexicans and other Latin Americans, as well as prejudice on the basis of sexual orientation. This suggests that the proposal to make Border Patrol agents asylum officers could lead to imbalanced and adversarial decision-makers, the opposite of what is called for in law. There was a widespread tone of anger and little restraint in the use of cursing and yelling. We found that Border Patrol threats of physical abuse — such as killing, shooting, and abandonment in the desert — were common, which raises concern over the safety and the handling of traumatized people in an asylum context. Finally, there were numerous threats to use law as a form of punishment, which indicates a problematic attitude among persons that might be tasked with gathering information and making legal decisions. - Why Border Patrol Agents and CBP Officers Should Not Serve as Asylum Officers. Josiah Heyman, Jeremy Slack, and Daniel E. Martínez. Center for Migration Studies (CMS) Essays. 21 June 2019.

VENEZUELA

In view of the current situation in Venezuela, UNHCR calls on States to ensure that Venezuelan nationals, stateless persons or individuals who were habitually resident in Venezuela will not be deported, expelled, or in any other way forced to return to Venezuela in accordance with international refugee and human rights law. This guarantee needs to be assured either in the official residence document issued to Venezuelans or through other effective means, such as clear instructions to law enforcement agencies. - Guidance Note on International Protection Considerations for Venezuelans – Update I. UNHCR. May 2019.

The devastating impacts of policies President Nicolás Maduro’s authoritarian regime has imposed since 2013 are driving Venezuelans to flee. Once the wealthiest country in Latin America, Venezuela has suffered complete economic and institutional collapse. Hyperinflation of 1 million percent has effectively rendered the currency worthless—and is predicted to reach 10 million percent in 2019. A dramatic decline of social services and the failure of state institutions have generated severe shortages of basic goods, including food, medicine, and vaccines, while political repression, rampant corruption, and widespread violence have created fear and desperation. -A fragile welcome: Ecuador's response to the influx of Venezuelan refugees and migrants. Refugees International Field Report. June 2019.

Asia

AFGHANISTAN

Violence continues to inflict large-scale casualties and fatalities on the civilian population. Indeed, during the first nine months of 2018, more civilians were killed than during any year since 2014. Highlighting the perilous security environment, some analysts are inferring that the conflict in Afghanistan may surpass Syria as the world’s current deadliest. - Afghanistan in 2018: A survey of the Afghan people. The Asia Foundation. 14 May 2019.

MYANMAR

It is not the first time that the Myanmar military has been accused of serious crimes in Rakhine State. As it has been thoroughly documented by the UN, Amnesty International and others, from August 2017 the Myanmar security forces launched a major attack on the Rohingya population in northern Rakhine State. The security forces killed, raped and tortured thousands of women, men, and children and burned down of Rohingya homes. The violence forced more than 730,000 people to flee across the border to Bangladesh. A UN fact-finding team has called for senior military officials to be investigated and prosecuted for crimes against humanity, war crimes, and genocide. Despite this, members of the Myanmar military continues to enjoy impunity. Investigations into military violations – where they happen at all – are not credible, independent, or impartial, and prosecutions virtually non-existent. - “No one can protect us”: War crimes and abuses in Myanmar’s Rakhine state. Amnesty International. 29 May 2019.

Australia

The Kaldor Centre Principles have been developed with the objectives of ensuring Australia’s compliance with its obligations under international law – including those set out in the 1951 Refugee Convention, its 1967 Protocol and international human rights treaties – and respect for the inherent human dignity of everyone who is displaced and in search of protection. - Kaldor Centre Principles for Australian Refugee Policy. Kaldor Centre for International Refugee Law. June 2019.

Europe

With a view to improving the effectiveness and efficiency of checks at the external borders, to contributing to prevention and combating illegal immigration and to contributing to a high level of security within the area of freedom, security and justice of the Union, including the maintenance of public security and public policy and safeguarding security in the territories of the Member States, to improving the implementation of the common visa policy, to assisting in the examination of applications for international protection, to contributing to the prevention, detection and investigation of terrorist offences and other serious criminal offences, to facilitating the identification of unknown persons who are unable to identify themselves or unidentified human remains in the case of a natural disaster, accident or terrorist attack, in order to maintain public trust in the Union migration and asylum system, Union security measures and Union capabilities to manage the external border, interoperability between EU information systems, namely the Entry/Exit System (EES), the Visa Information System (VIS), the European Travel Information and Authorisation System (ETIAS), Eurodac, the Schengen Information System (SIS), and the European Criminal Records Information System for Third-Country Nationals (ECRIS-TCN) should be established in order for these EU information systems and their data to supplement each other while respecting the fundamental rights of individuals, in particular the right to protection of personal data. To achieve this, a European search portal (ESP), a shared biometric matching service (shared BMS), a common identity repository (CIR) and a multiple-identity detector (MID) should be established as interoperability components. - Regulation (EU) 2019/818 of the European Parliament and of the Council of 20 May 2019 on establishing a framework for interoperability between EU information systems in the field of police and judicial cooperation, asylum and migration and amending Regulations (EU) 2018/1726, (EU) 2018/1862 and (EU) 2019/816. Official Journal of the European Union. 22 May 2019.

UNHCR cautions that harmonization should not lead to a lowering of rights and standards. Rather, it should be viewed as a means to achieve a fairer and more effective asylum system which reflects international standards and fundamental rights. - On the European Commission proposal for an asylum procedures regulation - com (2016) 467. UNHCR. April 2019.

Notwithstanding the severe consequences for the individuals concerned, including destitution and delays in their integration into the host society as well as implications for the country’s reception capacity for newly arriving applicants, the transition out of asylum seeker accommodation post-recognition is not widely researched and remains under the radar of policymakers. - Housing out of reach? The reception of refugees and asylum seekers in Europe. Asylum Information Database. European Council on Refugees and Exiles. April 2019.

Despite recent improvements in data protection mechanisms in the European Union, refugees’ informed consent for the collection and use of their personal data is rarely sought. Using examples drawn from interviews with refugees who have arrived in Europe since 2013, and an analysis of the impacts of the 2016 EU-Turkey deal on migration, this paper analyzes how the vast amount of data collected from refugees is gathered, stored and shared today, and considers the additional risks this collection process poses to an already vulnerable population navigating a perilous information-decision gap.” Two main takeaways from this research are first, the lack of transparency about the asylum process and how it prevents asylum seekers from entrusting the system with the exact information that would likely win them asylum status. The second takeaway is that innovation in the humanitarian sector may inadvertently be causing distrust within the refugee community and disrupting the asylum process. - Data protection and digital agency for refugees. Dragana Kaurin. World Refugee Council Research Paper No. 12. 15 May 2019.

The EU has chosen to perceive migration as a threat, and is focusing its efforts in securing its borders, increasingly depending on the work of Frontex. With its powers and competences constantly growing, and its budget now being counted in billions, Frontex achieves even greater autonomy. Its reach in European border control, even far beyond EU borders, makes questions about its responsibility for breaches of fundamental rights of refugees and other migrants more urgent than ever. - European Border and Coast Guard: The EU force of securitisation in migration governance. Mariana Gkliati. RLI blog on Refugee Law and Forced Migration. 24 April 2019. 

ALBANIA

This report presents country-of-origin information (COI) on Albania specifically relating to trafficked boys and young men published between 1 January 2016 and 31 March 2019, published by Asylos and ARC Foundation. Legal representatives representing young Albanian asylum seekers in the UK and elsewhere in Europe identified this topic as a major gap in COI relating to young person and child-specific persecution and harm and a common barrier for quality decision making for young Albanian males claiming asylum. - Albania: Trafficked boys and young men. Asylos and ARC Foundation. May 2019.

CZECH REPUBLIC

This article focuses on historical and current migration realities in Czechia, putting them into a broader societal context, and discussing the following key themes: labor migration issues, migration and integration policies, attitudes towards immigrants and immigration, international protection, and emigration. - Migration and integration in Czechia: Policy advances and the hand brake of populism. Dušan Drbohlav and Kristýna Janurová. Migration Policy Institute. 6 June 2019.

HUNGARY

The Commissioner is concerned that the newly adopted and contested inadmissibility ground for asylum has resulted in a systematic rejection of asylum applications and that the applicant is unable to access an effective legal remedy to challenge the decisions. She urges the Hungarian government to repeal the new inadmissibility ground and provide an effective remedy with a suspensive effect on appeal. The Commissioner considers that the systematic and arbitrary detention of asylum seekers in the transit zones raises serious human rights issues. - Report following her visit to Hungary from 4 to 8 February 2019. Dunja Mijatovic. Commissioner for Human Rights of the Council of Europe. 21 May 2019.

Middle East

IRAQ

Some 3,000 Yazidis, mostly women and children, reportedly continue to be missing after having been abducted by ISIS in 2014. Since Kurdish forces recaptured Sinjar in mid-November 2015, dozens of mass graves containing the remains of Yazidis have been found. - COI note on the situation of Yazidi IDPs in the Kurdistan region of Iraq. UNHCR. 6 May 2019.

SYRIA

Since 2011, millions of people have fled Syria seeking refuge either in different parts of the country or in neighboring countries, including Lebanon. In July 2018, the Lebanese government announced that they will facilitate the return of refugees to Syria under an agreement with the Syrian government. In March 2019, General Security announced that 172,046 refugees returned to Syria since December 2017 due to easing administrative restrictions and facilitating and organizing returns. In this document, Amnesty International explains the humanitarian situation of Syrian refugees in Lebanon and why the organized return of refugees back to Syria is not voluntary and premature. - Amnesty International public statement. Amnesty International. 12 June 2019.

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Part Three 10th Anniversary - Work in Canada

Each time Geoff and I visit Uganda, we pay our own way and go as volunteers working during our time there.  The main purposes of these trips are to reconnect with AFC staff about their needs and possible projects that we could support; to monitor existing ongoing projects; to visit completed projects; as well as reconnect with the community that we support in Masuliita.  We visit all the sponsored children in their homes (which we will talk about in a subsequent post), and conduct the necessary meetings with staff to ensure that everything JNFC supports is being carried out in the most effective way to bring about transformation.  

Meeting with staff at the Children of Jolly Education Centre in Uganda.

A significant amount of work in Canada is necessary to help make all of that happen.  

COMMUNITY AWARENESS AND INFORMATION SESSIONS

We’ve held Information Sessions in our home as well as in other venues to help explain what AFC is doing in Uganda, and to show how people in Canada can help through JNFC.

Camosun College students have highlighted JNFC as their project on International Social Service courses; there have been many supportive groups through the University of Victoria; and we have spoken in elementary and high schools including Shoreline Community Middle School, Reynolds Secondary School, Campus View Elementary School, and Monterey Middle School.  The Bear’s Den Coffee Shop set up an awareness display for water projects at the school.   We’ve made presentations to several Rotary Clubs on Vancouver Island and Bainbridge Island, to Results Canada, to other service groups and virtually anyone who makes a request.

 The Cadboro Bay Business Association, in our neighbourhood, has been supportive with donations and sponsorship for our events, and we’ve participated in the Caddy Bay Summer Fest.  Dr. Amanda Weinerman of Cadboro Bay Optometry, and Naz Rayani, Owner of Heart Pharmacy have been particularly outstanding in their support over the years.

Dr. Amanda Weinerman holding a baby that needed glasses

Dr. Amanda Weinerman (Cadboro Bay Optometry) has been a supporter of the work of JNFC and AFC by not only donating money for adjusting eyeglasses at her office, but by actually making two volunteer trips to Uganda:  in 2010 with her assistant and then in 2015 with her daughter.  For each trip Amanda collected between 500-600 pairs of used glasses which had to be cleaned and catalogued before going to Uganda.  She took all of her portable equipment as well as her own supplies. She was overwhelmingly welcomed as you can see from the photo the long line-ups. We are so grateful for Amanda and her big heart to help those people who have never had their eyes tested or ever seen the face of their grandchildren clearly.

The local community forming long line-ups waiting to have their eyes tested.

Hundreds of donated glasses waiting to be fitted.

Naz Rayani is the ‘connector’ who met Jolly as soon as she arrived at UVic in 2006.   Naz connected us to the Rotary Club of Saanich, which we will talk about in a later post, and continued to connect us to other interested people.  He continues to be a supporter since we started.

CHEK TV’s Jennifer Crosby did an interview in 2009 with Jolly at UVic and produced a wonderful segment for the evening news. The Saanich News and Times Colonist have published articles in their newspapers over the years.

Churches:  Special mention must be given to several church communities:  Awakening Church Victoria; Cadboro Bay United Church; Emmanuel Baptist Church; St. Georges’ Anglican Church; and St. Philip Church for their generous support on many levels.  We are grateful for your friendship, for sponsors of vulnerable children, for generous donations to support projects at the school, use of venues, and most important your prayer support.  You are appreciated beyond words.

FUNDRAISING EVENTS

Over the years JNFC has embarked on different ways to raise funds by being involved with Victoria International Development Education Association (VIDEA), Crowd Funding appeals, selling the Ugandan Arts & Crafts we bring back from Uganda, Christmas craft sales, and Hillside’s Night Before Late Night Shopping event.

We are very grateful to the Arbutus Singers Choir, a 65 voice community choir directed by Jack Boomer, who have performed seven benefit Christmas concerts for JNFC.  Thank you to Jack Boomer and all of the choir members who have brought Christmas joy to the concert goers while raising money to bring joy to children in Uganda.

Liam Wilson loved handing out programs at a concert in 2013.

We have taken thousands of photos in Uganda over the years and have used those photos not only for information but in production of calendars we sold for four years and cards that we continue to sell.

Our major event of each year has been in the summer:  three Garden Festival events in our garden 2009 to 2011; two at Emmanuel Baptist’s facility:  Day of the African Child in 2012 and the African Marketplace in 2013.  From 2014 to 2016 we held three Tea & Fashion Sale events in our garden.

GARDEN FESTIVAL

Laura Bulk and Rashna Charania

These summer events filled our garden with a bistro, Ugandan marketplace, silent auction, puppets, massage by donation by Lindsay Bagshaw, Cannor Nursery on site as well as a JNFC information display.

TEA AND FASHION SALE

Left:  Karin Hertel, Lindsay Bagshaw, Danuta Loisel and Jill Stokes.

Chris and Brian Crawford left and Ashley and Liam Wilson

PUPPETS

On our first visit to the school in Uganda in 2008, I was talking to the head teacher Janet, and I asked her for her ‘wish list’.  I thought that would be a good place to start finding ways to help the school.  She prepared a list of a lot of usual things for a school, and then I noticed the last item on the list – puppets!  

I had a friend here in Victoria, Madeleine Duncan, who was a puppet maker and had been sending puppets all over the world to missionaries working in third world countries.  Puppets are invaluable to help children open up and speak of trauma in their lives.  Janet knew this and wanted to use puppets at the school to not only help children but to also add creativity and fun.

I called up Madeleine Duncan and asked her to teach me how to make puppets, and after hearing about our trip to Uganda, excitement filled her voice as she offered to make some for JNFC.  Well, ten years later she has made several hundreds of puppets for JNFC, and she was willing to teach a number of us to make these cute little friends that have been sold as a regular fundraiser.  We held workshops for women interested in learning, and together we had a lot of fun producing them.  Over the years at least 100 have made their way to Uganda for the school, and they have generated thousands of dollars as a fundraiser here in Canada, and are still for sale!  

These adorable friends are $15 to a good home!

Geoff Helped the staff build a puppet stage out of papyrus.

Our daughter Jill and I were able to put on a fun puppet show for the children at the school, and then invite some of the children for a chance to try them out.  The staff were excited about the fact that they were the first school in the area to have a puppet stage!  If only papyrus would last forever.

JOLLY’S CONVOCATION

As the summer of 2012 approached, Jolly was nearing completion of her Ph.D  It had been five years of hard work and now it was time to celebrate.  During her first year in Victoria Jolly lived on campus while she did course work.  Then she returned to Uganda and worked from there, but would come back to Victoria each year for on average six weeks at a time.  During those times she stayed in our home which is close to UVic so she had easy access to the library, support and research she needed.  We witnessed first hand how hard Jolly worked on her research and papers, and we know how difficult academic English was for her. To reach this stage meant we needed to have a BIG celebration for Jolly in Victoria!

Dr. Alan Pence left, George Nyeko, Jolly Nyeko 

Her husband George was going to be in the USA on Bank of Uganda business so he was able to attend her Convocation as well.   Having George and Jolly here together for this occasion was such a joy.  Jolly wanted George to meet her friends in Canada on campus and in JNFC as well as the other connections she had made.

That summer we changed our fundraising event to “Day of the African Child” which is an actual holiday in Uganda.  It was held at Emmanuel Baptist Church which had a perfect facility with a gym, large kitchen and adjoining sitting room.  We showcased a Ugandan village that featured a hut largely built by Brian Crawford and included props to depict life in Uganda.  Featured was a silent auction, sales of Ugandan arts and crafts, puppets, drumming, African food for lunch, photos on display and sponsorship information. This truly was an amazing event to celebrate all that had been accomplished by Jolly and JNFC, and could not have been accomplished without our committed group of JNFC volunteers.

Group photo taken at Day of the African Child event in 2012

George was deeply touched, and as he was watching volunteers begin packing up at the end of day and organizing everything to transport back to our house, he said that he had never seen such a committed group doing so much work together for the sake of children in Uganda.  

VOLUNTEERS

 JNFC has been so fortunate to have had close to 50 different volunteers help in different capacities.  Some have been long-term and some short-term.  Some are visible with our public events and others are invisible working behind the scenes.  

Jonathan Stoppi is one such volunteer. In 2012 Jonathan attended one of our events and offered his services to produce a website for us.  Five years later he continues to maintain and update our website for which we are deeply grateful.  Chris Crawford and Mark Wilson have created the wonderful posters for our events, and Lindsay Bagshaw has volunteered for just about every event we have held.  We have appreciated consistent support from Brian and Chris Crawford, Debbie Blakely, Rashna Charania, Madeleine Duncan, Gillian Hanlon, Ted and Cyndy Bailey and Dave and Judi Peacock throughout the years.

Space does not allow for pictures of everyone but here are a couple of group photos of volunteers.  There will be more about volunteers in a future post.

Photo taken in 2009 Garden Festival

Photo taken in 2016 Tea and Fashion Sale in the Garden (Not all volunteers were available for the photo) 

FAMILY

We couldn’t have come through it all and accomplished all that has been done without the unfailing love and support of our family through the easy times and the difficult times.  From the youngest, Liam and Samuel who have given out programs, swept floors and babysat dogs on site, to the oldest, Geoff’s mom Kath who has been knitting African animals for JNFC for years in exchange for donations to JNFC.  To Jill, Ashley, and Mark we say thank you for your understanding and all the heart-felt, prayer and practical support, not to mention the hugs, you have given in every way possible which has kept us very close as a family.  You’re the best!

Samuel and Liam Wilson - always helping out and having fun doing it!

Jolly Nyeko with Kath Stokes and one of her knitted ‘Grandpa dolls’.

Back Left:  Geoff Stokes, Jill Stokes, Mark Wilson, Ashley Wilson, Kath Stokes, Leanne Stokes. Front: Liam and Samuel Wilson. Photo taken in 2015

Watch for our post next week showing work in Uganda.