#as in “kenji doesn't think they're good enough for his sis” kinda way tho

[oneirataxia-girl]

Relationship asks!! # 1, 2, 3, 5, 7, 10, 12, 15, 20, 21, 36, 39, 45, 48! I realize this might get a little long but I want answers for both Keller and Midlaw hehehe

hadley lovely you're so right this was long af 😭 so I split this into one post for Keller (this one) and another for Midlaw (link here!) but without further ado, let's jump in! tagging the other op anime girlie @auxiliarydetective bc I don't wanna spoil the others

1. How did they meet and what were their first impressions of each other?

Sabaody arc, when the Heart, Kid, and Strawhat pirates leave the auction house and they're surrounded by Marines. Killer jumps in and takes out one of them just as the man is about to attack Kenji's unknowing back; cue Kenji's eyes widening like dinner plates watching Killer land on the ground in slow motion and Killer thinking wow this guy is so dumb (affectionate) like my captain when we were young KID TF ARE YOU TOYING WITH THESE MARINES FOR WE GOTTA GO-

2. What kind of dynamic do they have with each other?

smartass x dumbass, sunshine protector x sunshine, "I'd die for you" "who said you could die??? WHO SAID YOU COULD DIE KILLER I NEED NAMES"

3. What do others think of them?

Kid is like ???????? at Killer's choice of a boyfriend, but Killer's taste is all his fault because Kenji like him in some ways (much to Kenji's horror but we'll get to that another time) and Killer is basically programmed to like that type; the other Kid Pirates, after grilling Kenji about his intentions of their beloved second-in-command, are pretty supportive of the two; Mari approved of Killer before they even got together; the other Strawhats also become fond of him, Franky and Usopp are the (joking) exception since both of them had to put up with Kenji ranting about Killer's weapons for weeks after Wano, Jimbei is the fishman Kenji goes to ask about having a crush and it’s very fluffy, then Brook, Sanji and Chopper pop in and it dissolves into teasing jabs, Robin mentions offhandedly to Nami about Kenji’s not-so-subtle attempt to ask after Killer in the day’s newspaper and Nami is iffy on whether the other pirate is good enough, but keeps those thoughts to herself until she can access Killer’s potential herself. Zoro pretends to be asleep through all this but he’s glad that Kenji doesn’t know about his fight with Killer as Kamazo (and has no plans of telling him that), and Luffy’s just glad that his crew is getting along with Jaggy’s

5. Is their joint future bright or bleak?

uhhhhhhhh... ideally yes. but it might have to change for canon events, but I do think they get a happy ending

7. Do they have a desire to protect each other?

YES. Killer is of the opinion that Kenji can't fight, and although that's objectively Not True, Kenji's combat levels are a lot lower than Killer's, so when their crews fight together, Killer tries to keep an eye on Kenji. Kenji is also fiercely protective of his Kil, so when anyone makes a snide remark about Killer's time on Wano, the poor sod has to face a very angry red ball of fluff (Kid) and a similarly furious, gun-cocking blacksmith

10. Who would win in a fight?

Killer. no diff, if they're forced to fight (which would be the only scenario either of them would raise a weapon at the other), Kenji would be out without question

12. Who is a better caregiver?

it’s a close one but Kenji. Killer is good at caring for everyone but himself, but Kenji is a firm believer of "you can't take care of anyone if you don't care for yourself" so Kenji is the deliverer of sunshine and smiles, and he's mentally okay while doing it!

15. Who has better fashion sense?

I really wanna say Kenji because he is the crew's secondary fashionista (behind Nami but before Sanji), but I believe that Killer's polka dot era is going to come back and that Killer was iconic af. so for now it's a tie

20. What's the worst thing about them teaming up?

Killer would constantly check up on Kenji, which could impact his focus and allow the opponent to get some hits that normally Killer could block. Killer's checkups and possible injuries could also affect Kenji's aim, as he might abandon logic and charge at the enemy without even loading his guns

21. What's the best thing about them teaming up?

if Killer does close range combat while Kenji takes care of mid-range, with both of them equipped with a talkie-walkie version of a transponder snail to communicate, then they could deal some serious damage to anyone facing them. other than the battlefield, they're also a pretty fire duo when it comes to making drinks (Killer watches in loving astonishment as Kenji comes up with the weirdest mixes that always turn out delicious); if both of them + Sanji are in the kitchen, the crews just know they'll be eating and drinking well

36. What is a gift one would give to the other?

Kenji would give him little metal decorations like bracelets or brooches with his mask's design integrated into the pieces. Killer would buy fun trinkets when the Victoria Punk docks on islands to show his boyfriend when they meet again

39. What's an inside joke they'd have together?

"when will Kid and Mari and Trafalgar finally kiss, I wonder?" "my sister has WAY better taste than those ruffians, Kil" "Ken, I'm one of Kid's 'ruffians'" "but you're the best ruffian to ruff, and Mari doesn't settle for anything other than the best, so she's definitely not getting with Jaggy or Tra-guy or both of them"

a ton of angst, lots of yelling, and three confessions later...

"so..." "don't. just lemme mope in peace, Kil"

Killer never lets Kenji forget this. it later becomes a joke that Kenji is actively terrible at predicting romantic relationships and he has fun making the wildest matches ever

45. If one of them was in trouble, what would the other do?

look... all I'm saying is if a guy named "Massacre Soldier" Killer has a boyfriend who apparently once used a person's blood to make his bullets, I would think twice before trying to hurt either one of them. rip(ieces) to those who do otherwise but I value my life

48. If they swapped bodies, how would they handle it?

first, Kenji would claim this as the reason why Mari should leave Law (Mari's typical poker face nearly breaks at the sight of big beefy Killer waving his arms around in typical Kenji fashion); then he'd get Killer to teach him how to use his Punishers, which leads to Killer strapping the blades to Kenji's body to prevent Kenji from hurting himself, which leads to a pouting Kenji, which leads to Killer petting his own head (wow Ken wasn't lying his hair really feels nice in these hands), which leads to Midlaw & co stifling their snorts at the sight of a (compared to Killer) smol twig of a guy stroking back the hair of someone twice his size that practically has a raincloud over his head. let's just say that after this, Law had to endure quite a few dirty glances and passive aggressive remarks from his brother-in-law for a while

give me a number + relationship and I'll tell you something about that relationship!