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buckyownsmylife · 4 years ago

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Follow you - Chris Evans smut

The one where Chris becomes your roomate and finds out he has a domesticity kink... and more

Warnings: Smut, breeding kink, domesticity kink, friends to lovers, rommates au, pandemic mention, hair-pulling kink, daddy kink, cockwarming, kind of allusion to an age gap, but can be read as reader being into teasing chris

Word count: 4.1k

A/N: Thanks to @mollygetssherlockcoffee for reading this over and helping me make it better! You’re the sweetest person ever! this is for my own birthday celebration challenge! Like I explained here, I’m going to try to fill every single AU I listed with the characters I picked for the challenge, and since the deadline if May 27, these fics will be posted randomly, as I finish them. Hope you guys like it!

Chris’ P.O.V.

“C’mon, sweetheart,” I’d been trying to convince her to close her laptop for the last two hours, unfortunately without any luck. She just glanced at me before returning to her document, and I groaned as I left the living room in search of what I knew we needed.

“Close the laptop and I’ll give you a sip.” This time when she looked up, she found me holding a bottle of my most expensive whiskey, the one she’d been dying to try ever since she first got invited to my place.

It was a tense moment of evaluation while she took in my offer and her workload, her head turning from her computer to me and then back to the device again, and I found himself growing anxious because of how desperately I wanted her company that night.

“Please?” I tried to convince her, even going so far as to pout - which at least earned me a giggle. I considered it a win, especially with the way it made my chest warm up. “C’mon, we deserve it! After the week we had?”

She frowned when she thought back on the stresses we had confided in each other for the last couple of days, and I watched with glee when she slowly closed her laptop, prompting me to wave my arms around in victory. “We?” She teased, getting up to stand before me with her arms crossed in front of her body, making me laugh.

“Alright, so maybe just you.” I couldn’t really deny that my work “problems” paled in comparison to hers. “Listen, I’m only trying to help.” She narrowed her eyes at me, reaching out for the bottle and unscrewing it before taking the sip I’d promised.

“Shit, this really is good.” A smug smile took over my face as I wrapped my arms around her, walking us back to the couch before making us fall over it.

“Only the best for you, babe.” I watched her roll her eyes at the pet name, snickering at how it affected her. I knew it made her giddy and she hated it, it’s why I insisted on doing it - or so I told myself.

Something deep inside of me whispered differently, though. I tried to ignore it. She was my best friend and we were going to be living together for the foreseeable future. No one knew when this pandemic would let up.

And lord knows that nothing positive had ever come out of my investments in romantic relationships. So every rational thought in my mind was begging me not to overcomplicate this. I couldn’t stand to lose her friendship, anyway. That’s why I had invited her to spend lockdown with me - my need to know she was okay, and be able to have her around whenever I needed to vent.

She was the only one outside my family who got my anxiety well enough to help me work through it when I was feeling bad, and she had even been able to prevent me from having panic attacks more than once.

I just couldn’t imagine going through this with anyone other than her. I simply hadn’t anticipated how fucking horny this period of forced sexual privation would make me, and I never expected her to become a willing victim to my needs.

But boy, once the liquor hit and she ended up over my lap, shivering as she rode my thigh without a care in the world, was I glad that she did.

“Is this what you like?” I asked, looking up at her with my mouth hanging open, unbelieving of how fucking sexy she looked as she used my body for her pleasure. I didn’t even care that my cock was straining against my jeans, begging me to move her on top of it. As long as I could keep enjoying the show, being a part of it, I was satisfied.

“I wanna learn it,” I pressed, moving my hands to hold her ass, squeezing it the way I’d always wanted to do but never allowed myself to dream about. “I wanna learn how to please you.” She made me feel something I hadn’t felt before, in any of my past relationships. There was attraction, of course, but there was also this deep, familiar feeling that made me feel at home. It made me feel safe, and with the help of alcohol, I was desperate to explore it.

“Ugh,” she groaned, letting her head fall back, drawing my attention to her breasts, the way they bounced in front of my eyes, unfortunately still covered. My mouth watered at the sight of it, wanting nothing much than to strip her bare and wrap my lips around one of her nipples.

“Don’t say stuff like that, Evans.” The comment threw me off, making me frown as I took a hold of the hair on the back of her head and yanked her to me, devouring her lips. They were soft - so much softer than I’d ever allowed myself to imagine.

“Why not?” I panted against her mouth once I was forced to separate from her taste of whiskey to search for some oxygen. She kept moving, her eyes hazy and glossed over, and it sent a pang of lust straight down my body when I realized it wasn’t completely due to the drinks we shared. There was also desire in there.

“You want to learn?” She asked, hands bunching up my shirt as she used her hold to grind against me faster. “Then fuck me, Chris.” She molded her body to mine, engulfing my lips once more as I laid her down on the couch, excited to have her underneath me - excited to see her naked body, explore it, get to know every little thing that made her tick.

I knew it would be a moment I’d forever remember, regardless of the amount of bourbon in my blood. I just never expected it to become something I was so eager to relive over and over and over again.

It was supposed to be a one time thing. When I woke up in the morning, I was ready to go back to being roommates. We were good at that. She was a morning person, by the time I woke up every morning, she already had breakfast ready for me, and then we’d go out to the backyard to let Dodger out together.

We’d sit and talk and then I’d go for a run - she’d have done her yoga already, while I was still asleep - I’d answer some e-mails, she’d work on her laptop by my side and the silence was just as comfortable as all of our late night conversations.

She’d sneak out to the kitchen and come back with a few sandwiches for our lunch, and then the rest of the day would go by with us doing whatever mundane task we had in mind, together even if we were doing separate things, and I didn’t feel suffocated.

I didn’t even run out of things to say. By the time dinner rolled around and I followed her back to the kitchen, cleaning up the dishes while she fixed us dinner - I wasn’t allowed to cook in my own stove, mostly because she was terrified of my food but hid it under the excuse of that one time when I started a fire - then we’d eat together, watch a movie together, talk until we fell asleep - always together.

I was shocked. It’d never been this way in any of my previous relationships. In fact, I was certain it was the reason why they had never worked. I’d given up on any realistic expectation of settling down precisely because of this: I just never expected to find anyone with whom a day-to-day life wouldn’t eventually grow boring.

It’d been three months and I still loved to wake up to her coffee. We still fell asleep every night side by side, too tired to move into different beds because we had laughed our asses off after skyping Scott.

And now that sex came into play in our relationship? I just knew there was no way I’d ever go back to being nothing but friends - or living in a place where she wasn’t the first person I saw when I woke up.

It sucked that it took a pandemic and a night of alcohol to make me realize that, but damn, was I grateful that I decided to open a bottle of whiskey that evening.

I kept waiting for the catch, the moment it would all go to shit, but it never came. Our lives resumed to how they used to be, only now I had this ongoing inner battle to not just bend her over the nearest piece of furniture when we were busy, and the ability to do exactly that whenever there was nothing else to do.

And for a while it was bliss. There wasn’t a nagging voice inside my head questioning this arrangement because it was theoretically perfect. I had a best friend, a roommate and a fuck buddy, all wrapped into one single person that I adored.

Life couldn’t possibly get better - until I realized that I wanted more. Talks of lockdown being over started and she had plans of going back to her place, of course, but I couldn’t stand the thought of being away from her.

I wanted to see my family too, but I wanted to take her with me. Introduce her to my mom, see her get along with my sisters. Witness how she’d be with my nephews and nieces - I knew how much she loved kids. And that’s when it hit me.

I’d given my heart to her. Somewhere between the morning coffees and afternoon runs, the nights where I’d rant about all of my silly problems and she actually listened to them - really listened, never making me feel bad about what could only be described as rich people problems.

All the innocent little gestures, and the not so innocent ones - when I discovered she was exactly the nasty slut I’d always dreamed of, the way she would randomly drop to her knees and suck me off, even while I was on the phone. Most times she didn’t even let me repay the favor. She just genuinely liked to blow me.

She also liked to play with me randomly, like when we were watching a movie and she mindlessly reached for my crotch, rubbing me until I got hard. It almost always ended in sex, and I just loved it.

I loved it, and I loved her, and the idea of her ever sharing this idyllic lifestyle with anyone else made me irrationally jealous.

And that’s how I knew it. I didn’t want to mess it up. But how could I not fuck this up?

Xxx

“Chris…” Her sweet voice called out to me, reaching my ears while I was hiding in my office, trying to get my thoughts in order so I wouldn’t just randomly blurt out what I was feeling for my best friend to my best friend.

To her credit, she didn’t try to force me to keep her company - but that only made me fall even deeper for her, leaving me a complete and utter mess while she went about her day as if nothing was wrong in the world.

“Yes?” I looked up to see her by the threshold, clearly reticent about invading my privacy. It made me smile, thinking back on all of the times my exes hadn’t been as understanding, even after I let them clearly know what I was needing.

“I made cupcakes, do you want me to bring you one?” The thought of her in the kitchen, baking a sweet treat just for me had my cock twitching in my pants. Biting my lips, I pushed away from my desk to finally get up and stretch my legs, taking advantage of the monitor to hide my hard-on.

“No, I’ll come eat them downstairs with you.” She smiled before leaving, and I soon trailed after her, walking into the kitchen to find the most delicious-looking little treats, just waiting to be devoured.

Much like her, I supposed.

I was reaching for one of them, already licking my lips in anticipation when something caught my eye, prompting me to raise my gaze and look at her again, but really look at her this time.

She was wearing an apron.

There was nothing inherently sexual about the damn thing, but the way she looked with it, going about her business in my kitchen like she owned the place… It just felt right, seeing her there.

And suddenly I couldn’t hold back anymore.

“Y/N…” I started, leaving the cupcake back on the counter and brushing off the crumbs as I circled the kitchen island to go stand in front of her. She hummed before turning to meet me, smiling slightly to signal that she was listening to what I had to say.

But I didn’t know how to say it. So we just stood there, staring at each other until eventually her smile became a frown. “Chris, what’s going on?” I still couldn’t speak. Much to my absolute surprise though, she just sighed, wiping her hands on the apron while shaking her head, a knowing smile on her face.

“You’re stressed, aren’t you? You’ve been working so much, that’s why I thought the cupcakes would be a good idea,” she explained nodding towards the tray where her sweet treats laid. “They’re a reward and a break all wrapped in one delicious cake.”

The comment was like a punch to the stomach - or a scalding wave of desire rushing through my body, straight to my groin. The idea of her thinking about my needs and catering (quite literally) to them just did something to me, and I didn’t know how to explain it - I don’t think I understood it myself.

“But since they didn’t work…” she continued, blissfully unaware of the conundrum she had put me into. “I know something else that will definitely work.” And just like that, the woman dropped to her knees in front of me, reaching for my sweatpants before I could find a way to close the mouth that was hanging open.

“I guess I’ll grab a sweet treat for myself.” She looked so devious, small hand encircling my already pathetically engorged member, that all I could do was whisper an, “Oh, shit,” when she immediately wrapped her lips around it, starting to suck me off without any preamble.

My fingers were white as I held onto the counter behind me to keep myself up. She looked so good, staring up at me with her lips wrapped around my dick, I felt like I was about to blow already.

Why did she have to be such a fucking tease?

“Oh, God,” I moaned when she managed to engulf the entirety of my member inside her throat, the choking noises getting to my head. My hand instinctively laced with her hair, first to hold her lips close to my navel, then to pry her completely off of my member.

“What’s wrong?” She questioned once she was able to speak, surprise written all over her features while I was still staring down at her slightly teary face and trying to find my voice.

“I-I have a problem.” There. I said it. I had finally made some progress in my goal to let her know what was going through my head. Only instead of curiosity, what I got was a confused expression from the woman still holding my dick, her eyes darting from my own to the member throbbing between her fingers.

“No, you don’t!” It would have been funny if I wasn’t so fucking frustrated. Yanking her by the hair, I complained, “Not that kind of problem!” pulling her to the living room so I could throw her on the couch, trying to ignore her moans of pleasure in the process.

I’d figured out pretty early on that she had a pretty serious hair-pulling kink, and if my plans of sitting down and having a level-headed conversation were ever in motion, they surely went out of the window the second she pulled my body down to cover hers and adjusted my cock so it would easily fill her.

“Son of a…” I groaned, letting my head fall down against her chest as the little vixen gleefully giggled underneath me, legs wrapped around my torso as she tried to thrust up and tempt me to move.

“Just wait a second,” I managed to reason, but she just shook her head.

“Fuck away your problem, Chris. Use me. I want you to.” Motherfucker. I really couldn’t catch a break with her. Just as she started to make me move again, my hand instinctively wrapped around her neck, lightly squeezing it just enough to get her to shut up.

“I wanna start a family with you,” I finally spilled, looking deep into her eyes as I tried to ignore that I was still balls deep inside of her. Her eyes widened, and now her mouth was the one hanging open.

I couldn’t really relish in it because she looked absolutely delicious and she felt stupidly heavenly to my throbbing dick.

A few seconds went by without as much of a reaction from her and I was about to pull out - despite still being achingly hard - but her legs held me tighter, stopping my plans of leaving her tight haven.

“You know…” She started to speak, a little out of breath, catching my attention as I finally gathered the courage to look her in the eye again. “When I first met you, I thought you were the epitome of a fuckboy.”

The unexpected sentence had me snorting, and then I just couldn’t stop laughing. Finally pulling away from her, she fixed her hair when she sat up and I did the same, shaking my head slightly as I rubbed my eyes.

Our own relative nakedness - well… mine, she was wearing her usual dress with no underwear under the damn apron - didn’t affect anything when I pondered over her words, until I decided to break the silence.

“I mean… I think I was?” She chewed on her bottom lip as she took in my response, analyzing it, weighing its validity in that gorgeous head of hers. I was nervous, but she hadn’t blew me off yet. And quite honestly? I’d do anything for that little hope that was growing inside of me.

“What changed?” Was her question, so unexpected I couldn’t help but question, “Huh?”

“What made you change?” It wasn’t an unwelcome inquiry, especially when the response became clear to me, lighting up my brain and warming my chest, spreading all over my body until I had no choice but to voice it.

“I realized I could have a future with you.” My smile was vulnerable but honest, and in her eyes, I could see that she knew that. When she threw one leg over my lap, straddling my hips, I allowed myself to breathe deeply again, leaning on the soft cushion while taking a hold of her ass.

“So, how are we gonna do this?” She non-nonchalantly asked, slowly rubbing herself against my still half-hard member. I groaned when I realized the implication of her words, knowing that the meaning paired with the feeling of her wet lips dragging along my cock would get it back up in no time at all. “You wanna do me right now?”

The brashness of the question made my eyes light up, as weird as it may sound. In that moment, it became clear just how perfect for me she really was, giving me what I needed exactly in the way I didn’t know how to ask for it.

“See? This is why I’m in love with you.” She rolled her eyes at that, making me laugh. I’d anticipated the gesture, I knew it’d take her longer to say it, but it was alright. The fact that she was willing me to give me a child was more than enough proof of her feelings for me, if her entire behavior ever since she moved in wasn’t already.

“Shut up and fuck me, Evans.” Throwing her back against the couch, she yelped in surprise when I took off my shirt and slapped the inside of her thigh, assuming my usual position of hovering over her smaller frame.

“Spread your fucking legs, darling. I’m gonna fuck you real good.” The way she bit her lip as I slowly penetrated her again showed me just how excited the prospect got her, and as I started to make good on my promise, her moans told me just as much.

“Holy fuck,” she commented as I pounded her ruthlessly, weeks of frustration and the rush of anticipation getting the best of me, and I was glad for the feeling of her nails biting into my skin because otherwise, I’d probably run over the edge of not even caring about her own pleasure as I chased mine.

“You gonna cum inside of me, honey? Make me a mom? Finally fulfill your dream of becoming a daddy?” Her words detracted me from my task of sucking bruises on the skin that was now mine to bruise, mine. I threw my head back, yelling a, “fuck yes,” as my hips sped up, desperate to fill her up, but I was determined to get her to cum before me.

“Say it,” she ordered, small hand circling my throat as best as she could, a throwback to what I’d done only moments prior. It wasn’t enough to choke me, but it did catch my attention. “I wanna hear you say it.”

Tears escaped the corners of my eyes as I blinked, the intensity of the moment overwhelming in the best of ways. “God, you are such a fucking tease…” She chuckled underneath me, giving my throat a squeeze before she raised up on her elbows to kiss my jaw.

“Better get used to it… daddy.” And just like that, I realized that I had yet another kink I hadn’t known about before her. Or maybe it was just her, and I was obsessed with the damn woman, painfully turned on by every little thing that she did.

“I’m gonna cum deep inside your little pussy, sweetheart,” I finally gathered myself enough to do as she asked me to. “You’re gonna belong to me forever now. Give me kids, make me happy. How do you like that?”

The mischievous grin she gave me told me everything. “I love it.” I knew this was her way of saying what she couldn’t yet voice, and I’d take it. I’d take anything she gave me, any chance I got to love this wonderful woman.

We came together, both riding our highs in deep ecstasy. I moaned when I felt myself empty all of my seed inside of her, incredibly excited about the prospect of starting our future together right then.

“You’re so fucking beautiful.” I cradled her face in my hands as I struggled to catch my breath, but she turned it to the side and pressed a kiss to my palm and I was breathless all over again. It was such a simple action, why did it get to me so much?

“You’re not too bad yourself, Chris.” I didn’t want to part with her warmth, so I just adjusted us on the sofa in a way that kept me inside of her, sighing contently as I realized I’d never have to sleep away from her again.

“I’m gonna stay right here all night.” I adjusted myself so I was resting my face on her boobs, perfectly happy to do just so, but by the tone of her voice, I knew she had a teasing smile when she called me an, “Old man.”

“And here I was, thinking you’d be able to go again.” Warmth filled my chest at the realization of just how badly she wanted me - just as much as I wanted her too. I was so damn ecstatic. Not even her pokes at my age would be able to affect me.

“Oh, darling… better get ready,” I warned as I adjusted myself to hover over her again, taking notice of the excited glint in her eyes, the way she bit her lip as she stared back at me. “I’m never gonna get enough of you.”

The next morning, I added a new kink to the list of random bits of information that were driving me slowly insane as I felt the overwhelming need to bend the woman that I now got to call ‘mine’ over the nearest piece of furniture and rail her until I had cummed deep inside her pussy: seeing her in my shirt while cooking breakfast.

Yeah, I was going to live a happy life by her side.

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yesimwriting · 4 years ago

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Corridor Moments

A/n this is a request from @mariannagris for a fic with the Darkling x Sun Summoner! reader where they're having a cute moment and then Zoya walks in and sees that they're together and gets jealous.

I'm working on a longer fic that should be up this weekend!! I'm working through a bunch of requests/updates rn I promise lol

He's no longer guiding me, but he hasn't moved his hands away--one on my waist, one on my shoulder.

"Aleksander," I try to keep my tone casual, only hinting at a warning.

There's no way he misses it, but he still allows the hand on my shoulder to ghost across my collar before setting his palm on my cheek. "Yes, my sun?"

Before I can roll my eyes, he brushes his thumb across my cheek softly. His touch has started to become more casual, but I'm not sure the comfort it brings me will ever lose its novelty. I tilt my head slightly, leaning into his touch.

"We're not alone." The reminder is more for me than him. All of his actions are intentional, he knows the risks of his sudden bout of affection. "We may be in an empty hallway now, but we're not alone."

Aleksander leans forward slightly, forcing me to press my back into the wall to avoid melting into him. I don't miss his half-smile, a confident smirk breaking across his features. He knows what he's doing. "And what would we need to be alone for?"

The slightest hint of annoyance bubbles in my chest. For someone so determined, he enjoys playing coy more than he should. My lips part, prepared to call him out for his teasing, but Aleksander senses my hesitance like always. He leans forward again, this time pulling my chin up slightly so that our lips could brush together if I just inclined my head slightly.

The closer we get, the more I feel our distance. His eyes flicker downwards, focusing on the slight part of my lips. Aleksander angles his head downwards, allowing our lips to meet fully. Now that the barrier's been broken, I have no choice but to reciprocate with full force, my hands leaving his chest and finding their way into his hair. Aleksander's hands grab the collar of my kefta. He pulls me towards him sharply, as desperate as I am to eliminate space.

And then he pulls me away. I'm left pouting on instinct, lips slightly swollen and breathing a little uneven. "Easy," he chides, "We can't afford to get distracted."

I wrinkle my nose at him. He started this, pulling me out of the meeting under the ruse of important, private conversation. "And who's the one doing the distracting?"

Aleksander smiles fully. A real grin, the kind of grin that rivals any amount of sun I could ever produce. "You," he breathes, leaning in again and brushing his lips against my cheek, "Considering you won't leave my thoughts."

I let myself grin back, his unexpected softness an arrow that pierces through whatever's left of my composure. "You're awfully sentimental today."

He straightens slightly, expression still light. "Is that a bad thing?"

Squeezing the hand that he's placed on my waist, I beam at him. "Not bad at all--just different."

He's still looking at me with a fierceness that sometimes frightens me due to its wholeness, but something ancient and dark is settled behind his eyes. Something haunting that he won't let me help him with. I haven’t known him that long, but I’ve figured out that his affection is often a secret plea, a silent attempt to rid himself of darkness. What's the point of being able to summon the sun if you cannot banish the darkness that haunts those you care about? I raise his hand to my mouth, kissing each of his knuckles deliberately. He exhales at the contact, some sort of tension coiling in him at the chaste contact.

I like us better when we’re alone. When he lets things like this slip from him as he tries to let my light in him. I could stay in this corridor forever with him. I could hold him by his hand to make sure he can’t slip away from me.

Reality does not allow me to coddle my dreams. If I lose focus, he’ll be able to convince me to do anything--to forget my own name even. I drop my gaze to the hand I’m still holding, running my thumb along his knuckles. “We can’t--we can’t stay.” Not the truest sentiment--he can do whatever he wants. “I can’t stay.” The correction leaves me bitter. “Not for long.” The addition only softens the harsh edge of reality slightly. “People are already starting to think you’re extending favoritism towards me.”

Aleksander lifts the hand I’m holding, taking my hand with him. He turns my hand over before placing a kiss on my palm. The contact is warm and fleeting and I’m powerless against the sentiment it stirs. “And this isn’t favoritism?”

I roll my eyes, his warm breath is still against my skin. “That depends--am I your favorite?”

His hold on my hand tightens slightly. “You already know the answer.” I let the corner of my mouth twitch upwards. Aleksander has already offered me more than I expected today, but it’d still be nice to hear him say it. “You, my darling, my sun, will always be my favorite.”

I beam a little easier, warmth expanding in my chest. Still, the feeling isn’t enough to burn through all of my reluctance. His affection stems from the fact that he believes me to be his salvation. That’s the only thing that makes sense to me. How else could i have won his affections?

“It’s easy to favor a Sun Summoner,” the response is soft, a bit of forced teasing edging my words.

His eyebrows draw together as his hold on my hand tightens, turning from a gentle squeeze to a desperate grab. “Sun Summoner or not, no one else has ever held my favor the way you do.” Aleksander leans towards me again, the comforting heat of his breath on my cheek. “And no one ever will.”

I’m reduced to nothing more than happy neediness, letting him cup my face and pulling me towards him. His lips meet mine with a desperate understanding that’s both bruising and coddling. Aleksander’s teeth graze my bottom lip, testing waters that are unfamiliar between us. I reciprocate, pushing even closer to him. He pushes us backwards, pressing me against the wall as he moves his attention away from my lips and down my jaw, leaving a trail of hot skin wherever his lips brush.

“Aleksander,” I breathe, placing a hand on his chest, “Meeting--we need to--”

He pulls away just enough to let me feel his grin, “That can wait.”

“They’ll think things,” Despite my warning, Aleksander doesn’t pull away, his fingertips brushing against my collar. “They’re waiting,” he sighs against my hair, still careless, “Alina--she’s waiting...” He continues to touch me like I’m an illusion of the light. “And--” He smiles at my waning resolve, attempting to move forward to silence the last of my protests with a kiss.

I turn my head, suppressing a reluctant laugh at his carelessness. Aleksander is not discouraged, pressing a kiss against my cheek. Shifting my gaze while placing my hand on his chest to make it easier to push him off fo me, I freeze. He must feel my new stiffness, because Aleksander pauses against me.

Zoya. She’s standing at the entrance of the corridor, watching us--watching me--with such a sharp look of ill-defined displeasure I’m surprised I’m not physically withered by it. Awkwardness and something akin to guilt leave me blind as I try to create space between me and the unbudging General. Does he not see her?

“Yes?” His voice leaves goosebumps against my skin--not an ounce of shame, but not a drop of that easy-going softness either. He’s General Kirigan again--sharp and incapable of shame or regret. He’s in complete control, all the power in the world is at the fingertips that are still on my skin.

Zoya’s expression does not waver, eyes still locked on me. “Those in the meeting were beginning to worry, but I see that you’re occupied.” I was wrong. She’s not staring at me, she’s staring through me--like I’m nothing more than a thin curtain on a cloudless day during high noon. “I’ll inform the others.”

“You’ll inform them of nothing I don’t approve of.” He’s fierce, the threat of venom apparent in each syllable. “And it’d do you well to meet the Sun Summoner’s gaze with a little more respect.”

I’m quick to grab his forearm, desperate to articulate how much I’d rather him not pick this fight--not when most can barely stand me, not when the more I think of Zoya’s look I realize any bitterness towards me is something else. Not hatred, no--resentment. The kind of resentment that’s only ever a byproduct of something else. If I was bolder, I’d assume it a look of jealousy--maybe not over the man, but the attention and praise received for being nothing more than new and shiny. Her eyebrows knit together as Aleksander’s hold on me adjusts slightly. Okay, maybe the fact that I’m with Aleksander has something to do with it--but it has to be more than that. Her dislike of me, her constant myriad of comments and looks all points to a jealousy much more bitter than that of someone love sick.

If something in her has been broken over time here, time around Kirigan and his pension for manipulating that I am not blind to and my presence and joy is a reminder of that, than I can bear her hatred. “She was looking at me normally.” Before he can challenge me, I move his hands off of me gently and slip away from between him and the wall.

I guess that’s what it takes for him to understand that I mean it, Aleksander straightens and takes a step forward. His eyes linger on me as he walks forward. I stay a few steps behind him, a pathetic attempt to cling to any kind of properness I can manage.

“If I were you, I’d at least comb your hair with your fingers before entering that room again unless you’d like to announce yourself as a form of entertainment.”

Being a decent person is nauseating sometimes. “And take the fun out of it for you?”

I don’t wait for her reply, moving down the hall to catch up with Aleksander. Still, when I’m no longer next to Zoya I brush my fingers through my hair in hopes of correcting any damage she’s created. Maybe I should be more worried. Maybe I should care about the opinions of others more. But every reason to stay away from Aleksander entirely feels so small. I’m not naive enough to fall blindly, but the thing about being a Sun Summoner is that you can bring light with you, no matter how dark the path you chose is.

I watch Aleksander as he places a hand on the door to the room. He offers me one last, genuine smile. His path isn’t as dark as he wants it to seem, and even if it is, I don’t care.

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marvelouspeterparker · 4 years ago

Note

how about messing around with tom whilst he's doing zoom press...

18+ smut under the cut :)

warnings: exhibitionism i suppose, cockwarming (oral), unprotected sex

word count: 2k––

––❊––

tom’s lips were soft against yours, “you going to behave during my interview, darling?” his hands gripped your waist firmly where you stood between his legs, right in front of the computer where he’d be taking his interview.

you hummed thoughtfully, your lips still pressed against his and he quirked a brow, pulling back to look at you. “no promises.” your smile was deceptively sweet, but he saw right through it. before he could respond, you leaned down and pressed your lips against his neck, trailing down softly, making sure not to leave any marks and he let out a small sigh.

“you know,” you started between kisses. “i can’t tell if it’s a good thing or a bad thing that you don’t wear pants during these things.” you could feel his breath hitch and you smiled against him, pulling away to look him in the eyes.

you straightened his suit out for him and looked back at the screen, he had two minutes until the call. you turned back to face him, and just as you did so, he got a message from his manager, telling him to click on the link a few minutes earlier to make sure the sound and video were ready to go.

you hummed, “looks like that’s my cue.”

he pouted and pulled you impossibly closer, big brown eyes staring up at you pleadingly. “one more kiss?”

you laughed adoringly and obliged, smiling when he let out a satisfied hum. you got out of his way and let him get settled, letting him believe that he was off the hook, that you’d be good. but it wasn’t until the interview started that you began your scheming.

you casually walked past him every few minutes behind the laptop and at first he payed you no mind, until he realized he could see more of your skin every time. his eyes flitted over to you subtly more and more as he answered the questions, noticing that you were taking off an item of clothing every time you passed by, pretending to do small tasks around the house.

when you were left in just your panties and bra, you left the room, knowing it would annoy tom to no end. you waited a few moments before stepping back into the living room, slowly making your way over to the couch where he could see you without being obvious about it.

“yeah i––” you could see his jaw clenching under the bright light, his gaze hardening ever so slightly as he answered the question, clearing his throat before continuing. you were now completely bare, a teasing smirk on your face as you kept your eyes on him.

you set yourself down on the end of the couch closest to tom, strategically spreading your legs so that the stand of the ring light partially blocked what he wanted to see most. you slipped two fingers into your mouth and got them wet before you let your hand trail down between your legs to rub at your bundle of nerves. when you caught his eye for a brief moment, you winked, biting your lip to silence your moan, making him swallow thickly and stammer for a few seconds before picking up where he left off.

you let your eyes trail over his body freely, the way he wished he could do to you and absentmindedly bucked your hips into your touch, your fingers pressing down harder making you let out a shaky breath a bit louder than you would have hoped. tom glanced over at you as he answered another question, and trailed off as he noticed the glazed look in your eye, the need in your face.

he couldn’t see all of you so he tried to shift on the chair subtly, move his head to see you better, but you just smirked and moved over so the stand still blocked you. he was getting annoyed, his voice was becoming more firm, his brows furrowed and that was exactly what you wanted.

the sight of him was sending you down a spiral. your movements were becoming more frantic and just as your head tipped back, your lips parting, the sound of tom’s response fading to the background, he cleared his throat, easily getting your attention. one subtle but sharp glare from him and your fingers paused.

you were breathing deeply, frustrated that you weren’t able to get your release, but your eyes caught the bulge in his briefs and your lips quirked up. soon but not soon enough, tom said his goodbyes and looked over to you. his gaze practically dragged down your body as he took his sweet time taking you in fully.

he jerked his head wordlessly, silently telling you to come over to him and you did without a single complaint. as you made your way over to him, he spread his legs and you took your rightful spot, standing between them.

he looked up at you and brought his hands to your waist, his touch tauntingly soft. “think you’re clever, hm? hiding what’s mine from me.” his eyes were piercing into yours and you took a sharp inhale, but you could tell his focus wasn’t necessarily on you. you could tell because his hand reached down between your legs, his fingers sliding through your wet folds teasingly slow.

your legs almost bucked and your hands shot out to stabilize yourself on his shoulders, but he payed you no mind and definitely showed you no mercy. he slipped two fingers inside you, scissoring them, no doubt opening you up for later. he let his thumb rub your clit firmly, quickly bringing you towards the edge but you knew he wouldn’t let you tip over.

“since you wanted my attention and misbehaved like a little brat, i’ll just have to keep a close eye on you, won’t i?”

you tilted your head and furrowed your brows and tom couldn’t help but smile at your confusion. he pulled his hand away from you, ignoring your pout, and then your whine as he licked his fingers clean, his other hand squeezing your side affectionately. “get on your knees, love.”

your eyes widened, and you stood there in shock, a shiver running through your body at his tone and his implication. was he really going to make you––

he arched a brow, “you’re not going to make me repeat myself, are you?”

you shook your head immediately and bent down between his legs. you shuffled back as he scooted his chair forward and looked up at him expectantly, eyes wide and completely at his mercy.

his eyes were trained on his screen as he set up for his next and final interview of the night, almost as if you weren’t there. “now pull my cock out like a good girl.”

you licked your lips and pulled his briefs down slightly, just enough to pull out his hard length. you didn’t waste any more time and licked along his base up to the tip before wrapping your lips around him and sliding him deeper into your mouth.

he looked down at you and bit his lip when you swallowed around him, clearly pleased that he was giving you attention. “naughty girl, this is what you wanted, isn’t it? my cock down your throat. always so needy, always such a slut for me.”

you nodded as best you could and he let out a breath of laughter, the look in his eyes dark. you started to bob your head slowly but tom’s hand was quick to grasp your jaw and stop your movements. you looked up at him confused and he smirked. “you didn’t actually think i’d let you suck me off after that stunt you just pulled, did you?” you tried to pull off of him to complain but he held you in place. “ah ah, you’re going to stay there and keep my cock warm while i’m working.” you squeezed your thighs together and he tightened his hold on you. “and don’t you even think about touching yourself.”

you blinked up at him and forced your thighs apart, putting both hands on his thighs. he loosened his hold and you tried your best to relax your jaw. he swiped his thumb over your cheek gently, looking at you to make sure you were okay with this and when you nodded, he smiled. “good girl.” the praise immediately got to you and you moaned around him, the vibrations making him buck into your mouth slightly but he kept his eyes on the screen, clicking on the link for the call.

his voice was clear and collected as he greeted the interviewer, and his answers were confident as he joked with them. but as you watched him patiently, you found yourself getting antsy, so you swallowed and sucked around him as quietly as you could, wanting to get a reaction out of him. he quickly cleared his throat, clenching his jaw as he reached down to grasp your throat. you gasped lightly, feeling yourself get wetter and as he paused to “think” of his response, he looked down at you and raised a brow, making you shrink under the table. he let go of you and brought his attention back to the task at hand.

the rest of the interview went rather smoothly, tom bucking into your mouth every now and then to tease you, dare you not to make a noise, a subtle smirk on his lips that only you would notice.

as soon as the call ended, tom pulled out of your mouth and helped you up, practically throwing you on the couch as he ripped what little clothes he had on, off. you licked your lips, already panting as you looked up at him, spreading your legs as you lied back on the cushions.

he stood before you, a cocky look in his eyes. “think i’ve teased you long enough, hm?”

you batted your lashes at him, a pout on your face. “please tommy. need you.”

he cursed softly and got between your legs, “i know baby. i know you do.” he stroked his cock a few times, teasing you before finally sliding his cock into you and the both of you let out a string of moans into the quiet, tense air of your home.

“fuck, tom.”

“that’s it, darling.” he started thrusting into you deeply, his jaw slack as he looked at where the two of you were connected. “such a tight pussy, lovie. always so good for me.”

he spread your legs further and leaned down to press his lips against yours, his kisses much more desperate than before. he soon picked up the pace and began pounding into you roughly and deeply, letting you feel every inch of him. the both of you were worked up enough, it wouldn’t take either of you long to tip over the edge.

when the both of you got too lost in the pleasure to focus on kissing each other properly, he trailed his kisses to your neck and left a generous amount of marks, his teeth biting into the skin, his lips sucking slowly and harshly as his hips pressed against yours. your legs wrapped around him tightly as you bucked your hips to meet his, and just as your breath hitched, your body starting to tremble, a shaky moan in the crook of your neck let you know that tom wasn’t far behind.

“cum on my cock, baby. wanna feel you drip around me. want you to make a mess.”

you moaned loudly and dug your fingers into tom’s back as your high came crashing through you, your clenched walls coaxing tom over the edge as well. you held each other tight and tom grinded his hips against yours, letting the heat fizz out until the very end, until your limbs were no longer tense and your breaths were heavy and slow.

tom raised himself up a bit and gave you a sweet, long kiss before turning the both of you so that you were lying down next to each other, the two of you still connected.

you sighed loudly, a giddy smile on your face as you looked up at the ceiling. “i love zoom press.”

tom laughed, pulling you into his side as he kissed your cheek. “me too, love. you have no idea.”

#these pictures really fucked us up huh #feels like i haven't written a blurb in so long #wasn't planning on writing anything but tom said guess again and gave us All that content #tom holland #tom holland blurb #tom holland x reader #tom holland smut #tom holland smut blurb

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writingonsaturn · 4 years ago

Text

Better Unsaid

a/n okay this has been all over the place!! it was originally going to be a blurb and darker and closer to smutty (so keep your eyes out for that??? lol), but then I made it softer and the concept got away from me and it got soooo much longer than expected lmao and i still dont love where it ended so maybe part 2?? i have the idea i just dont know lol

summary: Reader is a princess and Anakin has been her guard during the most public season for the past two years (not the most logical thing but just go with it lol, it gets explained better in the fic) and after a near death experience the two are conveniently forced into a....

ONE BED TROPE ONE BED TROPE *cough cough* ONE BED TROPE WITH ONE PERSON HAVING TO WAKE UP THE OTHER BC THEYRE HAVING A NIGHTMARE,, :)))))))

His smugness is the only thing about him I can consider ‘ugly’. And because I am so desperate to not have feeling for Anakin, the Jedi who has been assigned to protect me through coronation season (which lasts for most of winter), for the last two coronation seasons, I hold onto my distaste for that side of him. Which is why I suppress my laugh as he waits for my reaction with that confident smile.

“Come on, that was funny.”

Rolling my eyes, I let myself sit on my bed. I can’t tell if he’s actually funny or if my evening has been so boring that his sense of humor has started to become appealing to me due to comparison. In short, the suitor I was forced to spend an entire evening with lacked personality so much I’m starting to find Anakin funny.

“You’re much more entertaining than this evening’s suitor.”

Anakin’s expression shifts slightly, his assured grin dropping slightly. “Another miss?”

“You have no idea.” I relax slightly, taking a moment to be glad that I completed my father’s request and now I can just enjoy the time I have with Anakin. “I know my father’s desperate to make sure my marriage is useful for our people and that he worries about this selection process because he always thought my mother would be here to help, but sometimes I wish he wouldn’t rush it so much. It feels like all he wants me for is to marry me off in exchange of finance or weaponry or something diplomatic.”

“You’re more than that.” His response is so soft I think I might have missed it if I needed it less. I curse myself for feeling so validated by him. His words shouldn’t mean anything to me. After all, he could easily just be saying that because agreeing with my father will just make me more unpleasant to be around.

I smile politely while avoiding his eyes. I keep my hands on either side of me, fighting the urge to fidget. “Thank you, Anakin.” My words sound weak in my own ears, so I’m sure he notices my shift in mood. “I’m tired today, I think I’m going to go to bed early.” Normally, I’d be able to shrug off these kinds of things, but the beginning of Coronation Season makes me irritable. The anniversary of my mother’s death hits me harder each year.

“Y/n.” My name comes out so velvety I can’t find it in myself to interrupt him. “You are more than someone meant to be used as some kind of royal currency, and I mean that as more than just a...friend.”

I let his last word linger. We’ve tried so many titles that never seem to fit right. He’s the chosen one, one of the most powerful Jedi to exist, and the Jedi assigned to protect me each Coronation Season because that’s when my mother was assassinated. He’s my guard, but we’ve spent too many nights laughing together and talking about everything and anything. And I guess now he’s my friend, even though sometimes when he looks at me in a certain way or sits too close to me or reaches for my hand to guide me somewhere I can’t breathe right.

“Anakin, you know I love when you’re here, even though sometimes you drive me insane. And I appreciate your kindness, but your words can’t change the truth. That’s how my father sees me and he’s not exactly wrong. I’m not a son, I haven’t been raised to lead an army or lead much, and--”

“I’ve seen you in meeting after meeting, convention after convention. I’ve witnessed the way you handle real problems and I know how you care about your people. You’d make a great leader, you don’t need a husband to be valuable.”

My chest swells, feelings I never let myself think about mixing with thoughts of Anakin that I’ve spent so long trying to avoid. “That settles it, you’re my favorite person.”

He grins, the look warm enough to melt the odd lump in my throat. I fight down a smile as he steps forward. “And I wasn’t before?”

“I take it back--your head’s big enough without the additional praise.”

Rolling my eyes, I lean back slightly in order to recreate the distance he so easily destroyed. “And I thought you had finally warmed up to me, princess.”

The use of my title makes me skeptical. The last time Anakin used it was when he was trying to ease me so that I’d walk around the palace garden so he had an excuse to do the same. It was beyond late and I was half asleep, but he had os much energy he was desperate and just needed to do one more thing. I felt bad that his schedule revolved so heavily around mine (and when he softens his eyes and says please, I’m left incapable of saying the word ‘no’) so I agreed.

“What do you want?”

Anakin dramatically clutches a hand over his heart. He throws his head back slightly as if he’s just taken a fatal blow. “When did you turn so cynical? I’ve been back for three days and I’m starting to believe you’re a different person now.”

Yeah...he’s definitely getting ready to ask for something that’s more trouble than it’s worth. Then again, everything with him seems to be worth it in some capacity. Even if it’s just that one smile he gets when he’s truly content and doesn’t think anyone’s looking.

“Mhm,” I mumble, still fighting a grin, “so you’re not going to ask me anything?”

His lips part slightly as he exhales. I watch the way his eyes narrow at my victorious expression. “I don’t have anything to ask of you, but I do have a small request. A request so small you won’t have to do anything but say yes.”

Suspicious. Too easy. “You’re unbelievable.”

“You just said I was your favorite person. Remember that.”

I’m too tired for his coyness. I’d rather him make his ridiculous request now so that I can be in bed within the hour. Though I can’t pretend I don’t normally feel better after letting him drag me along on whatever ‘adventure’ he just needed to complete while also not letting me out of his sight. I used to tell him that I wouldn’t tell anyone if I wasn’t under supervision for an hour or two a day, but he dismissed the idea immediately. That’s been the cornerstone of everything.

“What is it?”

He sighs once, tilting his head slightly. The way his eyes soften tells me he’s already won at least half the battle. “They still haven’t caught the attempted--” Anakin pauses, something behind his eyes darkening. I know what he’s remembering. Last night, an assassin had gotten closer than they ever had. I had almost been shot in the garden, Anakin had barely pushed me to the ground in time. A fact he’s been beating himself up for since, especially considering that no one has been able to find my attempted killer yet. “They were so close to you. They were within palace limits and they disappeared like they never existed. Who’s to say they don’t work here and are waiting for the next moment you’re exposed? Who’s to say they aren’t here tonight, waiting for me to retire for the night?”

I didn’t realize how my near death experience had been so personal to him. He, like everyone else, was beyond frantic after it happened. But my father put an end to verbal worry before it could truly begin. He said the best thing we could do was act like everything was fine as the assailant was searched for. Anakin hadn’t been particularly cheery after my father instructed the guards to focus their search on known enemies instead of prioritizing venting the staff closest to me. I comforted him as best as I could, but he didn’t feel like speaking about it and I had to worry about the suitor meeting my father wouldn’t let me cancel.

“Anakin, you’re right next door to me.” I have to fight the urge to reach for him. “I was fine because of you, and I will be fine because of you.”

He sighs once, his expression not easing. “And if the person is silent? The attacker could easily work in the palace, but no one wanted to direct the search inwards.” His words are more strained than I’ve ever heard them be. “I think it’d be smart for me to stay in here. I know you’ve refused having a guard stay in your room or outside your door, but...” Anakin sighs. “Your safety would be more assured.”

Him staying in my room? The only line I’ve ever been allowed to draw, and I’m actually considering letting that go. If he seemed even slightly less sad, I wouldn’t even consider it. It’s not a good idea. I’m already too attached to him. “Anakin--”

“I’d feel more assured.”

Damn him. Stupid, extremely sweet Anakin who makes saying no to him impossible. I stretch my arm forward, letting my hand squeezes his forearm gently. “There’s no reason to not feel assured.” He doesn’t ease, the cloudiness behind his eyes remains stubborn. “You’re still worried.” No reaction, the haze that’s taken him isn’t letting go. “Fine--but tell no one or my father is going to take to posting guards at my door every night.”

...I guess there are worse ways to spend a night. Which is kind of a problem since I’m trying to...enjoy Anakin less. Ugh, I even sound dumb in my head. “I promise, princess.”

Ugh, he’s adorable. “You’re intolerable.” I stand from he foot of my bed and pull back the covers on my bed. He doesn’t reply, something dark still playing for him. I watch him move to face the door. Wait--is he doing what I think he’s doing? “No, you’re not going to stand there all night. You need sleep.” He has the audacity to give me an annoyed look. “I already didn’t want to do this so now you have to listen to my conditions.”

He raises an eyebrow, his lips pressing together oddly. He’s trying to gauge something from my expression, perhaps he’s looking for buttons to press to get his way. I guess I look as stubborn as I feel because instead of arguing he just sits on the floor. What? I watch him cautiously, trying to figure out if this is some weird argument trick.

“What are you doing?”

“What you asked.”

And just like that I’ve put myself in a position that I will no doubt regret terribly the second common sense returns to me. There’s no way to deny that Anakin and I are closer than we probably should be. We’ve felt like friends first since the day we first met. I can’t think of any reason to not offer to let him sleep in my bed except those stupid budding feelings I refuse to label.

It’s not like I actually like him. I can’t--I’m going to be married to some nobleman and he’s prohibited from ever forming attachments. I’m not even sure if we’re allowed to be friends. Having actual feelings for him would be so, so pointless. It would just lead to heartache and the ruining of the one genuine relationship I have. I’m just a tiny bit confused right now because he’s objectively really attractive and he’s always there for me. Always there to make a joke after a particularly rough meeting. Always there to offer me a supportive smile. Always there to humble me when I teeter on acting like my father.

Anyone’s heart would flutter at that, so it doesn’t mean anything. And if it does, I need to squash any budding feelings now before I mess things up. Which is why I should keep him at arm’s length until I get it together. But is that fair to him? And what if doing that is making things worse? What if it’s just reinforcing the idea of having feelings?

This is ridiculous. I’m going to get over this if it kills me. It’s just a bed and it’s only sleeping. I’m meant to be able to lead an entire union and I can’t sleep next to someone and act normal?” “You don’t have to sleep on the floor.”

The second the words leave my mouth I regret it all. What’s wrong with me? Did I seriously think I’d be okay?

I hear his soft exhale, “I’ll be fine. I’ve slept in worse places than on your marble floor.”

His voice sounds so weighted I can’t help but feel bad for not noticing that he’s still bothered. Whether he’s upset about his near miss or the fact that my father didn’t take his advice, I don’t know. But something’s wrong. The easy thing to do would be to just let him sleep it off. The smart thing to do would be to leave him alone until tomorrow.

I think of all the times that I’ve been upset and Anakin had refused to let me go to sleep angry or sad or overwhelmed. “I know, but it’s really not a big deal. It’s not like we don’t know each other. I mean, last Coronation Season you buttoned me into more gowns than my handmaid. And I owe you for saving me from one of the worst suitors I’ve ever had.”

“I’m starting to think we need to develop some kind of signal.”

The tiny bit of lightness that’s returned to his voice makes all of my internal struggle feel worth it. “You always seem to know.”

“That’s because when you’re reaching your limit, that one line appears between your eyebrows.”

I didn’t realize I had such a tell. I try to remember the way that the suitor drawled on and on about how amazing he was and how he couldn’t wait for the day he had a bride to bear his children and plan (tedious) social events. My hand moves to my forehead, trying to feel the crease Anakin mentioned. Can everyone tell when I’m growing tired? Am I that transparent?

Anakin’s slight laugh steals my attention. He’s facing me again, his elbow holding his head up on the foot of my bed. “What are you doing?”

“I don’t--I don’t think i get a crease between my eyebrows when I’m irritated.”

I hear him stand. I don’t realize he’s approaching me until he’s so close I could touch him without even needing. to stretch. “No, when you’re irritated you raise your eyebrows slightly, because that’s when you’re at your most sarcastic.”

“Really?”

The corner of his mouth tugs upwards. “Just like that.” I force myself to keep my expression blank. “When you’re reaching your limit, your eyebrows crease here.” His finger taps the space between my brows so gently I almost don’t realize what he’s doing. “And when you’re trying not to laugh--which is often, because you refuse to admit that I’m funny--you press your lips together in a way that forms a dimple here.” The knuckle of his pointer finger brushes against the bottom of my cheek.

I bite my tongue to fight the warmth spreading across my face. “I didn’t realize i was so transparent.”

“I can’t always tell what you’re thinking.”

“I’ll take it.” Maybe if I was less tired, I’d argue a little more. “You know you’re not that difficult to read either.”

“Really?”

“Yes, I can tell when you’re just being stubborn for the sake of it. I can see it in your eyes and you’re doing it right now.”

His expression harshens slightly before softening. “Y/n--”

“I’m not wrong.”

He sighs once, stepping back. I watch him pace around my bed before taking a seat on the edge of my other side of the bed. “Are you happy now?”

“Happy that I won? Absolutely.”

Anakin halfheartedly glares at me. “Careful, add a crown and a robe that trails down a throne and I’d feel like I was speaking to your father.”

“Careful, another side comment like that and I’ll ‘accidentally’ kick you off the bed in the middle of the night.”

“Not if I kick you off the bed first.”

I trace a thoughtless pattern on the fabric of my bedsheets. “What are you? Twelve?”

“I’m older than you.”

“Barely.” I continue the thoughtless pattern tracing as I fight the sleep from my eyes. “Your comebacks are usually more creative than that.”

He exhales, relaxing slightly as he rests his back against a pillow. “I’m tired, like you claimed to be.” His eyes flutter slightly, a bit of his exhaustion showing. “Go to sleep.”

I should. I’m too old to think I can put off a tomorrow I don’t want by just staying up. This is stupid. I’m too old to think I can put off the anniversary of my mother’s death by going to bed. She had been taken from us on castle grounds, killed by a revolutionist who viewed my mother as a class traitor. I still remember the way she slumped to the ground, her blood staining the snow beneath her. I remember the way the guards were so busy chasing her killer no one thought to keep me away from the body.

“Y/n?”

I scratch the back of my arm in hopes of banishing my thoughts. “Yes?”

“You’re being quiet.”

“You said to go to sleep, that tends to be a quiet thing.”

I can feel his eyes on me. “Since when do you listen to me?” Not trusting myself to actually reply, I only offer him a hum of acknowledgement. “I know you’re not half asleep.”

Folding my hands on my lap, I avoid his gaze. “It’s tomorrow.”

I don’t know why I trust him to understand my vague response, but I do. His silence stretches over us like a thin blanket on a cold night. Maybe he doesn’t understand what I’m implying. I can always correct him tomorrow, when my eyelids are no longer as heavy as my heart. The more seconds that pass in total silence, the more I think that maybe he’s fallen asleep.

I wouldn’t be surprised, Anakin has seemed tired recently, like some additional weight he won’t share with anyone has been thrust onto his shoulders. A small part of me rolls in guilt. I need to be a better friend, just because I’m suddenly a little too aware of him doesn’t mean I can shrug him off and ignore him.

My hand almost flinches away from the feeling of something surprisingly warm touching my pinky. When I realize that it’s just Anakin and that the contact was probably accidental, I force myself to ease. It’s not like we’ve never touched before, I don’t understand why I’m making it weird. Sitting in my bed in the dark doesn’t change anything. His hand turns slightly, pressing into mine a little more assuredly. Biting my tongue, I turn my hand slightly, exposing my palm. And just like that, our fingers intertwine.

“She would have been proud of you.” His voice comes out so low I barely register the words.

The words shouldn’t mean much to me--he never knew my mother and has no way to know what she wanted me to be.--and yet I find comfort in them. I smile, turning my head towards him. “You didn’t even know her.”

He rolls his eyes slightly, relaxing further before squeezing my hand once. “Who wouldn’t be proud of you? You’re kind and smart and decent to be around when you’re not telling me what to do.”

My heart swells in my chest so much I’m surprised it doesn’t burst. Could he be cuter? “Yeah...now I’m sure you’re my favorite person.”

“Now you’re sure?”

The smugness in his voice has me rolling my eyes. “Don’t make me regret saying that.”

“Maybe in the morning,” he says easily, “now go to sleep. There’s nothing worse than escorting you from meeting to meeting while you’re tired.”

“I’m not that bad.” Even in this darkness, I can make out the way he raises an eyebrow. “Shut up--I’m going to sleep, but not because of you.”

He lets out a slight huff. “You’re impossible.”

The desire to respond to his comment is not enough for me to win the fight against the weight of my eyelids. The moment my eyes shut, I feel powerless to anything that isn’t sleep. I let myself fall into a weightless sleep, my only tether being the Anakin’s fingers around mine.

A distant noise yanks me from my sleep. I’m too drowsy to do anything but register the sound. I hear another similar...whine? cry? I can’t tell and I’m too asleep to figure it out. I almost fall asleep again, but a third distressed sound keeps me from it. I wipe my eyes lazily with the back of my hand as I try to sit up.

Squinting, I make out a figure on my bed. It takes me a moment to remember Anakin and how I fell asleep. Our hands are still together and no light is peering through my window so it can’t be that long since I fell asleep. Another disgruntled sound carries itself throughout the room. I shift slightly, leaning over Anakin cautiously.

Golden brown curls are beginning to stick to his forehead and his eyebrows are drawn together sharply. He’s having a nightmare. I shift even further forward before cautiously placing a hand on his shoulder before squeezing him gently.

“Anakin,” I whisper, “it’s not--it’s not real.” His eyebrows draw together even more harshly. I shake him a little more stubbornly. “Anakin, wake up--you’re having a ni--”

My forearm is grabbed so suddenly I barely register it before I feel my back shoved into my mattress. I blink twice. His dark eyes are frantic and the look on his face is far from the gentle, easygoing expression I’m used to. He’s breathing deeply, his chest rising and falling from above me. I swallow a slight panic and something I don’t understand as I try to keep my eyes on his face and my thoughts away from how close he is. Anakin pries his fingers from my forearm one by one until only his palm is touching me.

“Y/n, I--”

“It’s okay.” Honestly, I’m more worried about his uneven breathing than the way he grabbed me. I can’t imagine everything he’s been through or how justified his nightmares are. Anakin moves his hand away from me. I don’t sit up until he’s off of me and sitting with his back against my headboard. “It’s okay--I just--you were having a nightmare and I thought I should wake you.” He doesn’t react. I turn my body further, keeping my back straight. Anakin doesn’t move, and the longer he stays still, the more I feel like I should say something else. “Do you want talk about it? Or do--do you want to talk about something else? Or go to sleep? Or get some water? Or--” The far off look behind his eyes silences me. I scoot forward slightly. “You’re okay, Anakin, I promise.”

His head turns at that, his eyes searching mine for something I don’t understand. “I thought...” He cuts himself off by swallowing once.

I shift a little more, trying to find anything normal in his expression. “Thought what?”

Anakin’s hand is on my arm so quickly I don’t even register his movement. I let his fingers press into my skin. He’s holding onto me like I’m a figment of a dream and he’s beginning to wake up. “I thought I’d failed.” He exhales, the sound heavy. “Failed you and that you’d--I thought I had lost you.”

A lump rises in my throat, thick and unmoving. Cautiously, I place my hand over the one still gripping my shoulder like a lifeline. “You didn’t. Nothing happened, it was just a dream.”

His gaze falls to the ground before he repeats the last of my words. “Just a dream.” There’s a hollowness to his voice I don’t understand.

I exhale, carefully running my thumb over his knuckles. “Yes.” He doesn’t say anything but his expression hardens again. I let us sit there like that for a long minute. “I promise.”

“You can’t promise things like that.”

I sigh, unsure of where to go from here. “Bad dreams are only bad dreams.” He doesn’t reply. “I think you should try to get some more sleep.”

Anakin is unresponsive. I shift back, but before I can transition from almost being on top of him to just sitting next to him, he pulls on my arm to keep in place. “I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you.”

“Nothing’s going to happen to me.”

“You almost died today, y/n. I was right there and if I had been a second later--”

“But you weren’t.” He doesn’t ease. “You were there and I was fine. Don’t torment yourself over what could have been. You’ll drive yourself crazy.”

“If anything ever happened to y--”

“It’s not going to,” I whisper, ignoring the way his hold on my arm tightens even further, “Especially this time a year when I have a pretty good gau--”

He tilts his head slightly, eyebrows drawing together and a ghost of a smile on his lips. “Pretty good? Really?”

“Someone needs to watch your ego, chosen one.” This time when he tries for a smile, the look has some strength behind it. Relief pools in my stomach. “Now get some sleep, tomorrow’s a busy day and when you’re sleepy you’re beyond irritable.”

Anakin lets me pull away enough to lay down, but he doesn’t follow. Not for a long second. When he does, his movements are impossibly rigid. I watch him out of the corner of my eye as carefully as I can manage.

“Y/n?”

I regret turning my head immediately. I didn’t realize how close he was. It would take no effort from me to make our lips meet. Wait--why am I thinking of that? I’m not allowed to think of stuff like that...especially not about him.

“Yes?”

He lets out a breath before moving his hand. I don’t understand his hesitation until I feel his hand cupping my cheek gently. “What if next time I’m not enough? What if next time I lose you because I’m not strong enough?”

I never thought my death would be such a personal thing to him. Sure, I knew that we had some kind of bond, some kind of friendship, and that my death would bring sadness. But I never imagined I’d matter enough to him that thoughts of my death would be frightening enough to slip into his subconscious and become a thing of nightmares.

“You are enough. Nothing is going to happen to me and if it does it’s not going to be because of you.” Anakin’s lips press together in a way that implies serious uncertainty. His thumb brushes across my cheek so unexpectedly I almost ask him what he’s doing. The intensity behind his eyes is enough to burn me. “Was your dream really that bad?”

He lets out an uncertain breath as his eyebrows draw together. I don’t miss the way his jaw clenches. “It’s more than the dream. I...y/n, princess,” he tacts on, a hint of humor returning to him, “you’re more than a mission to me.”

The admission is so soft I can’t help but smile. “I know, Anakin, we’re--”

“You’re more than a friend to me.” I don’t know if my blood freezes in my veins or if my lungs don’t contract when they should or if my heart literally skips a beat, but I know something in me completely stops at his words. “I--”

“Don’t say it.” I don’t know how I managed to cut him off so sharply and I’m a little disappointed when I do, but it’s the right thing to do. Thought of the code that’s so important to him have clouded half the immense shock and joy swelling in my chest. “What you’re trying to say...I um, I want to say the same.” I try to drop my gaze but he tilts my head up slightly with his hand. “But we shouldn’t, you know that.”

"You want to us to pretend that nothing’s different? You want me to escort you from meetings with one suitor to the next every Coronation Season until you’re married off?”

“No, I’m not saying that. The point is that I’m not saying anything.” His eyebrows draw together in uncertainty. “Isn’t it enough for now, for both of us to just know? If we say it...that could mean bad things for you. And I don’t want to be a bad thing for you.”

“You could never be.”

It’d be so easy to believe him. To believe him and to let him say what I never imagined I’d be able to hear and damn the consequences of tomorrow. “Can we just refrain from verbally saying anything until you’re sure?”

“I’m sure right now. I’ve been sure since the first time we ever walked in the garden together. The night after the first Coronation Ball I escorted you to.”

I remember that night well. The way he hadn’t scolded me for needing air or taking off my uncomfortably high heels to walk in the grass. “If you mean it, you won’t say it yet. I refuse to get in the way of what you’re meant for.”

His thumb runs my cheek entirely, stopping at the corner of my mouth. “Are you capable of not disagreeing with me?”

Rolling my eyes slightly, I place my hand over his. “Probably not.”

Anakin exhales, his playful irritation clear in the sound. “You’re impossible when you’re tired.”

“I am not tired.”

“I can see the sleep in your eyes.”

“I can see it in yours too.”

He pauses, eyebrows drawn together cautiously. “I’ll go to sleep if you do.”

He must be more tired than I thought if he’s compromising with me so quickly. “Deal.”

Neither of us close our eyes for a long second, we just watch each other with wide eyes. It still doesn’t feel like he’s eased, but he’s come back to me so much more than he was earlier. I’ll make sure to check how he’s feeling in the morning. The first morning after we’ve...I don’t know.

I’m trying really hard not to get excited because anything that’s been not said could be taken back so easily. That’s the point--but it’s hard not to let my heart get ahead of my rationality. I’ll just take the good for what it is for now and tomorrow we can figure out the rest. Even though he’s not allowed to form attachments and my father really wants to marry me off to foreign royalty.

Tomorrow. This can begin to be solved tomorrow. My eyes shut and I let myself roll fully onto my back. The second I’m comfortably settled, I feel Anakin shift against the bed. I’m too tired to open my eyes until I feel a weight placed against my chest.

I open my eyes on instinct, less surprised than I should be when I see Anakin’s head resting against my chest. Before I can speak, I feel his arm rest against my side. “Anakin,” I breathe, my hand moving to smooth his hair out of his face the way I’ve wanted to for so long. “What did we just talk about?”

“You said not to say anything,” he mumbles comfortably, “I’m not saying anything.” ...It is kind of the ideal compromise. Especially since I’m too tired to find reason and he feels so warm. “I can feel you overthinking. Go back to smoothing my hair before I have to rise and stand at your door so that your handmaid comes to wake you. Something tells me she’d be glad for the excuse to get rid of me.”

That might be the most dramatic thing I’ve ever heard him say. Selma is the most patient woman in the palace. “Selma would never report anything involving me, I can’t believe you don’t like her. She’s the sweetest woman I’ve ever met.”

“She’s the one that doesn’t like me,” he says, “she always watches me like she’s trying to figure out if I’m planning on stealing you away.”

Too tired to fight my smile, I go back to smoothing his hair out with my fingers. After a moment, he lets out an exhale that relaxes his entire body. “Goodnight, princess.”

“Goodnight.” The word is barely a mumble as I feel sleep tug against me for the second time tonight.

It’s strange, but my excitement doesn’t diminish my tiredness, it just makes the prospect of rest feel so much fuller. Safer. Because there’s so much to sort out and grieve but it’s okay, because we have the time and everything feels okay because Anakin is here, right beneath my fingertips.

#anakin skywalker #anakin #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin x reader #anakin x you #anakin skywalker imagine #anakin skywalker x you #anakin skywalker x y/n #star wars #star wars x reader #star wars imagine #star wars imagines #star wars fic

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xoxo-teddybear · 4 years ago

Text

Just Stay - Bakugou Katsuki

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: ANGST, Cursing

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Pt.1 Pt.2

Summary: It’s almost splits-ville for Bakugou and Y/N, but Bakugou’s not ready to let go.

“Hey....can we talk?”

Bakugou looked up from his seat on the couch and paused the TV to look towards Y/N. He took notice of her attire. Jacket and shoes on with her purse nearby.

The couple of 3 years had been on fighting ends for the past few months. It was always over little things and recently they had just gotten into their biggest fight over Bakugou’s jealousy. He had been wrongly suspicious of Y/N and her boss sleeping together and demanded she quit being a hero, claiming if she did he could take care of the both of them with his earnings. They fought it out with harsh words and plates being thrown across the kitchen, but eventually they made up. In the end, they were still cuddling in bed and giving each other kisses, and life was once again blissful. At least, to Bakugou. Y/N was in a different state of mind.

She had grown tired of the constant fighting. She missed her old Katsuki. The one who trusted her even with his insecurities and communicated. Now, he bottled everything up and constantly yelled. She felt like she was living in a war zone and she was losing, so she surrendered and made her decision. It was time for her to go.

“Sure babe. What’s up?” Bakugou said sitting up a little straight with a smile on his face. He felt nerves rising in his chest but he was hopeful it was nothing. He loved Y/N. Truly. Just seeing her or thinking about her gives him butterflies. He intends to marry this girl, but he can’t help his own problems. He’s been trying to deal with it himself but no progress has been made.

Y/N noticed the smile. It made her heart ache. It was the smile he always had on whenever he saw you, and it was also the smile that never stayed longer than a few minutes. After those minutes, his screaming would be introduced.

“Bakugou. Please don’t call me that right now,” Y/N said with shut eyes as she bit her lip and took a seat next to him. She didn’t sit close by like she usually did. She put some distance between them and when Bakugou tried to move in closer, she raised a hand to stop him.

“...Why can’t I call you ‘babe?’ And why the hell are you calling me ‘Bakugou?’” He seethed out. He was already pissed and it hadn’t even been 5 minutes. “Y/N! What’s going on?” He asked with concern. Y/N took a deep breath before she sighed and looked at him with sad eyes.

“I think we should break up.”

Bakugou’s eyes went wide and his anger turned off. He did a complete turn as fear and an uneasy feeling entered his system as those words left your mouth. He looked at you for any signs of weakness.

‘Maybe this is a joke. There’s no way she’s serious. She has to be lying!’ Bakugou thought to himself as he continued to shake in his seat.

“W-What?” Was the first thing he could put out. “Heh...I-I...No, you’re..you’re kidding, right?”

“Bakugou..”

“Please don’t call me that, Princess. I-It’s Suki, Katsuki, Baby, please anything but that!”

“I’m sorry....” you said with your head down and hands in your lap.

Silence fell upon the room and you could hear Bakugou’s little whimpers of weakness from time to time. You saw in your peripheral vision that he was shaking and you noticed how his eyes glistened with tears.

“Why?” He asked with a whispering voice.

“It’s just...it’s not the same anymore Bakugou. All we do is fight and yell and yeah there’s some good times in between but the bad outweighs the good,” your tears began to fall because this hurts you just as much as him. “I don’t feel like the same person anymore, Katsuki! I used to be so happy and confident and ever since we’ve been fighting I’m always upset and I feel so weak and I’m always second guessing every move I make in fear of making you upset! ....I can’t live like this anymore.” You whispered the last part.

“Do you not love me anymore?” Bakugou asked with a shaky voice. Your head snapped as your jaw dropped in shock.

“I- I love you so much! Too much! I love you so much that I’ve been destroying myself just to stay with you!” You explained.

“So then why do you want to leave me?!” He screamed.

“I don’t want to but I have to!” You said as you stood, “This isn’t healthy anymore and I’m not as happy as I used to be and you’re not the same! You’re always mad now, you’re always yelling and I don’t want to feel like I’m in a war with my own boyfriend. It’s supposed to be me and you against the world, but recently its been feeling like me vs. you.” You said.

“Then I’ll change!” He began, “I’ll do better. Work’s been stressing me out and I’ll stay home more and spend more time with you! I-I’ll stop yelling and I’ll...I’ll be nicer and be better just please stay!” He stood as he spoke. You looked up to him with tears streaming down your face and you saw as his tears fell from his cheeks and went to the floor.

“Please Y/N! You can’t do this to me, I need you so much. I love you so much, I’m begging you not to go, PLEASE!” Bakugou knew this was so belittling of him, but he couldn’t care less about his ego. He couldn’t afford to lose you, the girl he courted for so long and spent years with.

“Bakugou-“

“Katsuki!” He corrected. “It’s Katsuki to you!”

“....I have to go,” you said and gathered your things as you stood up. Bakugou shook his head and repeatedly said “no” as he ran after you and held you by your waist from behind to keep you from going.

“Let me go, please Bakugou.”

“Please! Please Y/N look at me!” You bit your lip to hold in your sobs as you turned to face him. It was the least you could do after he dropped his guard and held no dignity for himself in the moment.

“I’ll let you walk out that door right now, and I’ll leave you alone for the time being ONLY if you promise me you’ll come back to me. Please! If you need a break, I can give that to you but please don’t leave me permanently!” He offered. “You don’t even have to go! I’ll go, and I’ll find my own apartment to stay in until you’re ready for me again but please PLEASE stay in my life......I need you,”

His tears fell as his eyes were blood red and he held back his choked up sobs. You sighed as you went in to hug him one last time. He took it as a sign of agreement and settled the slightest bit as his arms quickly wrapped around you. But this was going to be your last hug for awhile.

“I’m sorry Suki. I love you so much...but I can’t stay here anymore,” you said as you looked up to him and placed a hand on his cheek. “Maybe some time in the future if things change and become different, I’ll come back to you, but right now, I need to get away.”

“No Y/N, please-“

“We’ll be okay. This is what we both need. We have to get away from each other.” He cried even more at your words and you followed his actions. “These past 3 years with you have been amazing, Katsuki. And I feel so blessed to have known you for as long as I have, but I just need a break. Please give me that.”

Bakugou looked into your eyes as he came to a decision. One that would break him.

“I can’t.” He said and backed away from you shaking his head, “I can’t allow myself to willing let you leave me. I love you so much and I need you in my life Y/N. I’m always going to beg you to just please stay...but I can’t stand to see you like this.”

Bakugou showed a sad smile before he spoke.

“So I won’t ‘willing’ let you go....but I’m gonna turn around. I’ll turn around and hopefully a certain amazing, beautiful, powerful goddess won’t try to get away. But if that goddess ever decides she wants to come back, I’ll be waiting for her with open arms.” Bakugou said and then turned, showing you his backside. You gave a sad smile as you realized this was him giving you the chance and break you needed.

You quickly ran up to him and wrapped your arms around him, giving him a hug from behind. You pecked his cheek and noticed his eyes were closed as tears fell.

“Bye Suki,” you whispered and walked out the door, leaving Katsuki alone with his back still turned and tears still falling like a flowing river.

“Bye Princess.”

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witch-hazels-musings · 4 years ago

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Requests are still open? If so, how about zhongli or kaeya with a GN reader that has trouble falling asleep? (bonus points if they look drowsy during daytime)

^ with the time change I’m feeling really sleepy most of the day. I would love for Zhongli to make me a cup of tea ... like I bet it's a treat.

Warning -> none :)

How about some tea?

Includes: Zhongli, Kaeya

Character X GN reader | Anthology

Zhongli

There is something about this man's level of knowledge and insight into the things around him that’s incredible - somehow he knows the strangest of things while nothing of the simplest of things

Ask him the price of a common item, he has no idea, but ask him why the sun dances across the sky and he will tell you a tale long forgotten to the sands of time

So it’s both surprising and not that he knows something is strange about you

“Your demeanor looks strange.” He states with his hand against his chin and head slightly tilted.

“Oh, uh. Yeah, I just had a hard time sleeping last night is all.” You wave him away and continue with your task. You had started early with it, since you couldn’t sleep, and were nearly done.

“If you’d like, I could brew you some tea with valerian root. It has an interesting flavor, but will suffice.” He hasn’t really moved from his place throughout your whole conversation. He’s almost like a statue, one hand at his chin, the other resting against the small of his back.

“Uh, maybe.” You grab the large bag of items and lift it into your arms. You let out a sigh at its weight and try to shift it until it rests more comfortably in your arms. “I’ll get back to you.” With a warm smile, you give him a quick nod and head off.

You look back at him and he is still standing there, just as he was before.

Zhongli is a person who will keep his promises no matter what, even if you aren’t sure you created a promise with him

He can be very persistent and often takes people at their word - so when you see him show up later that day with all the material needed for a nice cup of tea, you shouldn’t be shocked

“Zhongli?” You stand with your hand on your door and the other in your hair. You had returned only shortly before he arrived and thought a nice shower would help refresh your mind.

“I was able to acquire the root I mentioned earlier today.” He’s just standing there, totally deadpan and serious. It makes you laugh.

“You didn’t need to go out of your way for that.” You say through laughter, the lightness of it lifting the atmosphere.

“I do recall I said I would brew you tea.”

“Yes, you did. Come in.”

You watch as he enters your home, something he hasn’t done very often. The two of you always found each other on the streets or walking along the harbor. Your relationship had always been friendly, and you enjoyed spending time with him. Truthfully, you longed for the relationship to be more. It somehow felt so domestic to see him moving through your kitchen with ease as if he’d lived there for years.

You sit at the counter and watch as he nimbly gets everything ready. The way he cuts the root into small pieces, the way he collects water in the teapot and sets it over the stove. The skillful way he organizes the loose leaves of the tea he’s brought which, you knew, would complement nicely with the valerian.

You enjoyed watching him as he prepared the tea. The simple process turned into an elegant orchestra of movement and execution. Once the water was at the right temperature, he poured the liquid into the cup and you watched as it turned a playful yellow.

Elegantly, he placed a saucer before you before resting the cup quietly in its place. You take in the fragrance and catch the hint of wood and sweet flowers.

“Do enjoy.” He gestured before following the same process to pour his own.

You bring the liquid to your lips and are surprised at how perfect the water temperature is. As the contents fill your mouth, you immediately sense the earthy taste. It’s overpowering, but only for a moment. Once the initial aroma passes there is a relief of sweetness and floral, which is quite refreshing.

“This is …” you pull your gaze from your cup before continuing, “kinda awesome.”

“And it is much better when spent in good company.” There is a warm smile on his face and you wonder if the liquid was making you warm or if it was him.

“I appreciate you doing this. It was nice of you.”

“My pleasure. I could sense you were in need of something.”

“I’ve just had a hard time sleeping lately, well, really most of the time.” You take another sip of the warm liquid.

“Mmm, perhaps there is something plaguing you?”

“Ha, not really. I’ve just always had a hard time sleeping at night. My mind won’t turn off I guess.” The soothing smell of the tea is starting to make your head heavy.

“If this aids you, then I am happy to teach you how to make it. Or do so myself if you wish.”

“Thank you, Zhongli.” You look back at the teacup and take a few more drinks before placing it on the saucer. Outside, you hear the citizens walking by and the distant shouting of those on the docks. Most of the time, you didn’t pay any attention to the sounds of the city, but today they seemed to be a soothing noise. Something about the way it all mixed and settled in your ears just felt right.

“It must be working.” You catch his eyes and turn your head. For some reason, his eyes seem more powerful than normal.

“It must be. I’m going to go rest on the couch for a minute.”

“Please do, I will clean up here.”

You settle into the couch and observe Zhongli from your place there. He’s already emptied your cup and cleaned it in the sink. His hands perfectly worked just the way he wanted them to. It feels like there are weights on your eyelids and it becomes harder and harder to keep them open.

The last thing you see is Zhongli standing in your kitchen drinking his cup of tea as he looks out the window.

Kaeya

He doesn’t let anything get past him, so he would definitely know something was up with you

“You look a little tired there.” Kaeya appeared out of thin air. You had been so distracted that you hadn’t noticed anything for a while. The passing of the time or the citizens walking from place to place, none of them registered. So when Kaeya’s face was suddenly before you and you caught his half-smile, you didn’t pay it much attention.

“Do I?” Your head was fuzzy like someone had turned on the radio but all the channels were missing. This sensation had gotten so commonplace that you often ignored it too.

“Yeah. Are you okay?” He leaned down, his smile gone and replaced with a concerned expression.

“I’m okay. Thanks.” You try to give him a reassuring smile and hope he doesn’t worry.

He watches as you walk away. There is something off about your steps, but he isn’t quite sure.

He’d likely do his own background investigation to figure out what is troubling you. He’s ready to tackle any problem no matter the size in order to bring back your more cheery disposition

When he finds out that it’s because you have trouble sleeping he gets to work. He’s asking the alchemists to come up with a potion, he goes to the church to see if the healers can assist in any way, he might even try some non-conventional tactics to help you sleep

After many days of rain, the sun had started to return to the city. There was a cool chill that ran across your arms and the back of your neck as you bent down to pour out the excess water from the plants. I should probably replace this with some dry dirt, you think to yourself as the water spreads across the cobblestone.

When you finish, you watch as the other citizens pass by. A few wave and some just keep on about their day. A few drops of cold water fall on your face and make you jump as it runs down your cheek.

“Hello, again.” A familiar voice calls out to you and when you look, you see Kaeya confidently making his way toward you.

“Hello.” You return and wipe the raindrops off of your face. You’re reminded how tall his when he stops but a few inches in front of you and stares down at you.

“Heading out now that the rain has stopped?” His hand is on his hip and he’s wearing his dashing smile.

“Yeah, I was thinking of returning some books to the Library. I’m sure Lisa isn’t pleased I haven’t returned them yet.”

“I’ll accompany you.”

“You sure?” You give him a quizzical look. He’s always so busy, it’s strange for him to have extra time to spare.

“Of course.”

“Okay, well let me grab the books.” He waits patiently outside until you return, books in hand.

He’s a man with a plan, and he’s going to enact that plan

He may have a pleasant smile plastered to his face, but he always has something working in the background, shifting in the shadows

Somehow he has convinced you to visit his office. You aren’t sure how he convinced you, the conversation you had with him didn’t seem to discuss anything about having a cup of tea, and especially not in his office.

“Thanks for the drink, it smells delicious.” You let the warm vapors run across your face and breath in the sweet smell.

“Please take your time.” He sits in the chair next to you, his leg resting on his knee and his back against the plush cushion.

You sit for a while and listen to the sounds of the room. The way the wind slides over the glass window, the sounds of footsteps walking through the hallways, voices of the knights growing and fading as they accomplish their tasks. The atmosphere starts to make you drowsy and you close your eyes for a minute, the warm cup resting on your legs.

“You seem relaxed now.” You hear his voice and open your eyes again.

“Yeah, there is something comforting about this place. I’m not sure why.”

“Probably because I’m here.” You chuckle at his comment and take another sip of tea. When there are only a few drinks left you placed the cup back onto the saucer before preparing yourself to leave.

“Well, thanks again.” You start to get up but he stops you. He’s grabbing your shoulder and ushering you down onto the couch.

“You should rest.”

“Huh, I don’t need to?” You try to sit back up, but he continues to push you down.

“Yes, you do. I can tell how tired you are. When was the last time you slept.”

“Kaeya, you’re being silly.”

“When was the last time?” He asks again, sitting on the coffee table and crossing his arms.

“... I don’t know … I tried to get some sleep last night but It didn’t really work.” You feel the soft cushion of the couch under you. It smells like Kaeya and it's pulling you in.

“I have some more things to do, but you are welcome to rest here.”

“I have a house…”

“Yes, but you already said this place was comforting.” He smirks at you, again somehow convincing you his way is the best way.

“I won’t fall asleep.” You retort, rubbing your eyes.

“Just give it a try.” He stands up and you follow him with your gaze. You watch as he grabs a blanket and starts to unravel it over you. It’s thick and extremely soft. “Now, close your eyes.”

“I’m telling you …”

“Mmhm, just be good and do it.”

Your eyes track him as he makes his way to his desk. The sun is hitting his back and the color of blue reflects against the wall. You blink a few times. The blanket is so warm and the pillow is just right. You close your eyes for just a few seconds, I definitely won’t fall asleep, you think to yourself before you slip into a world of pleasant dreams.

#genshin impact #genshin impact X reader #genshin impact headcanons #genshin impact musings #genshin impact fiction #genshin kaeya #genshin zhongli #kaeya x reader #Zhongli X reader #zhongli #kaeya #kaeya alberich

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marvelatthetwilight · 4 years ago

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Secrets & Lies

Part 1: The Secret

Part 2: The Secret’s Out

A/N: Thank you all so much for your feedback on part 1 and 2. I see there potentially being one more part to this, if people want it!?

The day had come. The snow was settling and the allies had gathered at the Cullen house, ready to defend their friends against the Volturi.

You felt out of your depth completely. Surrounded by red eyed vampires, reminding you of the crimson eyes of Demetri, his face haunting your thoughts and your dreams.

You hadn’t heard from him at all. Nothing.

Bella had decided it was a good thing, that maybe he had a conscience and he had decided the best thing for you was to keep you here, where you were safe. Carlisle wasn’t so sure, knowing Aro as he did, he would never forcibly keep you from Demetri, but he had strict rules about newborns in Volterra. He and Edward talked about this at length each evening. Edward feared that Aro had more sinister intentions, and he knew he possibly couldn’t save you from that without putting his family at risk. He worried for Bella if his suspicions were true.

You had spent so much time together in these weeks, helping her to gain full control of her thirst and supporting her with your gift (not that you could help her really, but she appreciated your support either way). You knew that Edward was worried about you becoming close when it was inevitable that you would soon be separated, you had overheard him advising her to distance herself, that it would be harder for her and Renesmee the more time you spent together. He quickly changed the conversation when he heard your thoughts on the matter, realising that you were nearby and he hasn’t spoken of it since.

Jacob had become distant too, his guard was raised constantly in a household full of red eyed “bloodsuckers”. He had overheard enough conversations to know that it was inevitable that Demetri would take you, and that you would be turned and be like them. He was saving his heart from being broken again, losing another friend to the other side. Instead, he focused himself on his imprint, trying to keep her happy and distracted from the chaos that was building around her, but that didn’t stop him from caring about you, wishfully thinking there was something he could do to save you.

~~~

“Y/N should come with us. Either way Demetri will look for her, we just put more people at risk if we try to hide her” Rosalie says with a sigh.

“You know I can hear you Rose, you don’t need to talk as if I’m not here” she rolls her eyes at you as you turn to Carlisle and Edward.

“You’ll be at risk if you come with us, surrounded by those who don’t share the same

“I don’t want to put anyone at risk, I’ll come with you” I want to be with Demetri. Edward looks over at you. Sorry.

He smiles at you, “I already told you, it’s the mate pull, you can’t help it. I’m glad that you are thinking positively about it.”

“I just...I just don’t want anyone else to be hurt because they’re trying to protect me from the inevitable” you sigh as you look around at your friends.

“Being part of the Volturi aside, the mate bond is pretty cool” Emmett says as he pulls Rosalie into his side.

You smiled at Emmett, thinking about Demetri holding you in the same way. Your face flushed with embarrassment as Edward coughed lightly, reminding you he was there. Sorry again.

I suppose we’ve just got to wait and see what happens now.

Demetri’s POV

The Masters had landed in Seattle, ready to make the journey into Forks to “speak” the Cullens. We were due to meet them, along with our witnesses we had gathered in a clearing outside of Seattle, before moving to the agreed clearing to meet the Cullens.

The anticipation of seeing Y/N was killing me, if I wasn’t already dead, of course.

I had been preparing myself to explain what had happened, why I had kept this secret from them. As soon as Aro takes my hand he will know what has happened and what I’ve done, I need it clear in my mind my reasons for it.

I wanted to give her time to say goodbye.

I tapped your foot on the floor in anticipation, Felix glanced at me before growling low. Calm he mouthed to me. I shot him an apologetic look before forcing my foot to stop.

The Masters swept into the field, surrounded by the rest of the upper guard, along with some lower guard and the witnesses they had gathered on the way. We walk towards them, Jane offering her hand to Aro as we get close enough. He glances at me as he searches through Jane’s mind. He turns to look at his brothers.

“It seems that our dear Demetri has met his mate. And she is a Cullen no less!”

“Is she gifted? Could she be of use to us brother?” Caius asks Aro, seemingly disinterested in the conversation unless it benefits him in some way.

“She is still human brother, she’s a human Cullen. Like our dear Bella was” Caius growls at this statement.

“We still do not know if they have kept their word brother” Aro snaps his head in Caius’ direction. “You think they would lie to to us brother? That they had kept it a secret that she is still human? Fed us lies about her changing? That I am stupid enough to fall for that?” Aro was now inches away from Caius’ face, his body tense with anger. Marcus breaks the tense silence with a question directed to me.

“Why did you not inform us of this dear boy? You have waited centuries to find her, I would think you would have shouted this from the rooftops.”

I sensed the hurt in Marcus’ voice. He treated me like family, and I would normally talk to him about most things, it was unusual for me to keep a secret.

“I wanted to give her time. They know what is coming. They know that she will come with us, I just wanted to give her time with them to say goodbye.” I plead with Marcus, hoping he can sense my bond to her, but know that my bond to the Volturi has not wavered.

“What do you say brother? These secrets and lies must mean that Demetri’s ties to us are...weakening does it not?” Caius turns to Marcus, expecting him to confirm his suspicions I assume, but he does not.

“Our dear Demetri has strong feelings for this Cullen yes, but his loyalty to us has not changed, he just has additional bonds, that is all.” Aro smiles at this, and clasps his hands together, suggesting he has made a plan.

“Y/N will come with us to Volterra following our meeting with the Cullens. As a human, she was not to know of our rules regarding immortal children, she is not to blame here. However, Demetri dear...she will have to be turned. For your loyalty we will allow her to stay in Volterra, but you and Felix will need to train her. She can join the lower guard.” With that, Aro turns and clicks, commanding the guard to follow him towards Forks.

~~~

You stood between Edward and Carlisle, the rest of the Cullens to your left side, except for Alice and Jasper who had still not returned. Bella, Renesme and Jacob stand to your right, with the rest of the wolves and the Cullen allies behind you.

You were very aware of the fact you would be the sole human, in a field full of vampires, and though you attempted to still your heartbeat, it was thumping so hard you could hear it in your ears. “Just breathe Y/N, no one will harm you” Edward said, glancing at you, having heard your panic. You took a deep breath, before you felt something nudge at your shoulder. You turn to see Jake, looking at you with worry in his eyes, and you reach to stroke the side of his face, letting the softness of his fur calm you. You lean against him as you whisper “I’ll be ok Jake. I’ll be ok” he whines softly at this, knowing that this might be the last time he ever sees you. That it will definitely be the last time he sees you human, and he takes the moment to take in every detail he can, before moving back to his place beside his imprint.

You take a sharp intake of breath as you see the Volturi appearing in the distance, it is clear that they outnumber the group standing behind you, and the fear inside you increases.

“Aro’s looking for Alice” Edward whispers, as you look carefully at the figures in front of you, your human vision not enough for you to be able to identify figures. Your heartbeat rises as your eyes feel drawn towards a figure to the left of the figures in the middle, Demetri.

Demetri’s POV

I can’t take my eyes off of her, her hands clenched at her side, eyes darting across the group beside me as she attempts to focus on the figures. She’s looking for me.

Carlisle walks forward before speaking, but my eyes can’t leave Y/N. “Aro, let us discuss things as we used to, in a civilised manner.”

Caius scoffs at his words before Aro replies “Fair words, Carlisle. But a little out of place given the battalion you have assembled against us”.

Carlisle shakes his head, “I can promise you, that was never my intent. No laws have been broken”

“We see the child, do not treat us as fools” Caius spits out in reply.

The conversation continues with Carlisle confident of his innocence and Aro confident in his guilt, asking for evidence of his innocence by meeting the supposed immortal child.

“Edward, as the child clings to your newborn mate, I assume you are involved”

Edward looks at Bella before walking towards Aro, his hand stretching out as soon as he is close enough. Aro takes the offered hand, enclosing it in his own, he hums with interest.

“I’d like to meet her.”

Edward turns to look at Bella and the immortal child before nodding. Bella, the child, the wolf and the large Cullen begin walking before Aro interrupts.

“Bring Y/N with you young Bella, I know dear Demetri is keen to have her safely with him and we are all very keen to meet her.” He smiles before looking towards me, I nod briefly, before walking towards where he is standing with Edward.

I will not harm her.

Edward looks at me in shock, before nodding in understanding, and he looks back towards his mate.

The group continues walking, this time with Y/N in tow. The walk is painfully slow, and I can’t stop my foot from tapping impatiently in the snow.

When they finally reach us, I realise that I’m frowning, and I quickly try to replace this with a natural smile before looking towards Y/N, but she avoids my gaze.

“Ah, young Bella. Immortality becomes you.” He turns to Y/N, “and Y/N, you are even more beautiful than Demetri described, we are all looking forward to you joining us in Volterra. You will go to him now yes?”

Y/N looks at me and I smile at her, nodding, before she steps tentatively towards me.

~~~

You walk towards Demetri, his eyes locked on yours, and suddenly you are no longer aware of what is going on around you.

“Y/N” he breaths out your name, and you realise you’ve never heard your name sound so beautiful as it does when it comes from his mouth.

All the weeks you’ve been waiting for him have led to this moment, “Demetri” you reply, and he smiles at the sound of your voice.

He holds out his hand to you and you take it, walking away from the group talking in the middle, you glance back to see Aro leaning forward as Renesmee holds her hand to his cheek.

“Y/N I must first apologise, I wanted to contact you, I was desperate to, but, I feared that if I contacted you that this would shorten your time with your family and your friends. I did not wish to take that time from you.” He gently touches his hand to your cheek, and you place your hand on top of his own.

“I don’t mind, I keep being reminded that we will have forever together, so I’m sure you will be able to make it up to me” you reply with a hint of flirtation to your voice. You cup your hand over your mouth, realising that you were still close enough to be heard by everyone else and your face flushed.

Demetri chuckles at this, before his attention is drawn back to the group standing with Aro. Everyone’s attention is now far into the distance, with your human vision you have difficulty making out the figures until they are much closer. Alice.

You cannot hear the conversation between Aro and Alice, but can see her stretch out her hand for Aro to take. Demetri tenses at my side, and you sense the conversation is not going as expected. Demetri glances to the tall vampire you saw him with when you first met, who nods briefly and before you can register what is happening you are in Demetri’s arms travelling faster than you thought possible.

Your mind tries to process what you have seen, trying to rationalise the raised voices you briefly heard before you were picked up. What was Alice so angry about? What did Demetri not want you to see?

Taglist:

@volturidoll13 @clearwater-hoe @like-rain-or-confetti @teampaul @fatiguing-thoughts @wallwriterstuff @moviequeen51 @awesomebooklover17 @cncogirl18 @raindancer2004 @officialfictionalwreck @megzdoodle @slasher-sweetie @evakipara @reclusive-chicken-nugget @icarusinstatic

Part 4: Sick of Secrets

#demetri x reader #demetri volturi #demetri imagine #volturi #twilight x reader #twilight imagines #twilight

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mrsalwayswrite · 4 years ago

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To Be My Night And My Day - Part 2

Summary: Hvitserk has been your best friend since childhood, the one you can always rely on. So when you start doubting your current relationship with Sihtric, Hvitserk kindly offers to help you out….but the consequences are never what you expected.

Pairing- Sihtric x Plus Size!Reader & Hvitserk x Plus Size!Reader

Warnings: Angst, tears, soft boys

Words: 3k

Tag List: @youbloodymadgenius @evelynshelby @pomegranates-and-blood @deans-ch-ch-cherrypie @geekandbooknerd @adrille88 @dini73 @flowers-in-your-hayr (lemme know if you want to be added or deleted)

Catch up with Part 1

Sunlight streamed through the window in your home, warming your skin, as you tended to the few herb pots on the window sill. A pleased grin resided on your face as you took in how the plants were thriving. They had been a gift from Queen Aslaug for your last name day. You could not wait to tell her how alive and vibrant they were….unlike your prior attempts.

At the sound of the door opening, you looked over your shoulder to see Sihtric come in. You smiled at him, ready to make a quip about him getting off early from training. The tease died on your tongue when you really took in his appearance. His shoulders were hunched over, like he carried the weight of the world there. Each movement, each step, was slow and deliberate as if moving through a fog. Even the couple warrior braids on one side of his head were thoroughly disheveled. You wondered what had caused him to run his hand over them so aggressively and frequently. Yet it was the frown that marred his handsome face and the distant look in his dark eyes that caused a concerned churning in your gut.

"Sihtric, what's wrong?" You fully turned around, dusting the little bit of dirt off your fingers.

Carefully, he unhooked his sword belt, moving methodically, and laid it on the table with that far off glaze still over his eyes. His soft lips were pressed together in a thin line. It was not until he began walking in your direction that he lifted his gaze to meet yours. His arms wrapped around you, pulling your full frame against him. You immediately placed your arms around his neck, laying your head on his chest. Beneath your ear, you could hear his unsteady heartbeat and his shallow breathing. Internally, you attempted to quell your own fear, knowing Sihtric needed comfort right now, for whatever had caused his distress. This was the first time you had ever seen him act this way, and truthfully, it frightened you.

You started to massage the back of his neck with your hand, lightly squeezing and rubbing it in a way you knew soothed him. In response, his arms tightened around you, somehow drawing you even closer as if he wanted to meld your bodies into one. His head rested on yours, and for a moment you thought you heard a sniffle but you were uncertain.

A handful of minutes passed before you decided to break the silence. "Sihtric? What happened?"

"I'm going to ask you a question…." he whispered, "....and I need you to answer honestly."

"Of course."

"Did Hvitserk and you have sex recently?"

Immediately, you felt as if you had plunged into a frozen lake. Ice filled your veins, even as you tensed. It had been two days since Hvitserk and you slept together, and you had truly hoped that the blond prince had taken to heart your begging for him not to say anything to Sihtric. Guilt had clawed away continuously at your mind ever since Hvitserk walked out of your home, determined to find your man. But that night when Sihtric returned from guard duty, a tired smile on his face and a lingering kiss to your lips, you knew Hvitserk had not found him. So you had hoped, and prayed, that this would all blow over somehow.

Yet the truth was, a Pandora's box had been awakened in you. For even now, you still thought of Hvitserk in your bed, confessing his devotion to you. And you desperately wanted to make love to him again.

"So, he was telling the truth…." Sihtric stated blandly. His arms unwound from around your waist, then grabbed yours from around his neck and dropped them like they had physically burned him. Without another word, he stepped back away from you, creating distance that felt so much more than just physical.

Your heart shattered like broken pottery at your feet with the utter look of betrayal on his face. "Please, lemme ex‐‐"

He held his hand up, cutting you off. Your mouth audibly snapped shut. Silently, you watched him take several shallow breaths, hands on his hips, as if trying to internalize his anger and pain, to make sure he did not lash out at you.

At this moment though, you wish he would. Anything would be better than watching him attempt to hide his pain, his heart tearing in two. You wish he would scream at you. But this was Sihtric. He was too good, too kind, too caring to lash out at you. It only wrecked your heart even more.

"Sihtric, please, it was--"

"I trusted you." He cut you off again. A tear slid down his cheek before he hastily wiped it away. "I thought….I thought you were happy with me. I know we haven't known each other long but….I guess I should have expected this."

"What?"

"I have seen the way you and Hvitserk look at each other. You always explained it away as being best friends, but I know….in my gut I knew there was more to it. But I trusted you. You're the only woman besides my mother I've ever trusted….and cared for."

Tears streamed down your cheeks and dripped onto your ample chest, a physical manifestation of the river of anguish coursing through you. "I am happy with you."

"Then why?! I don't understand!"

"Because….ugh, it seems so stupid now."

"Am I not enough for you? I know he's a prince and I'm only a bastard but you said that didn't matter. Has that changed?" He took another step back, furthering the void growing between you two.

You wanted to reach out to him, to bridge the gap, to just touch him and hope he felt your sorrow. But the crestfallen look on his face, the dejection in his dark eyes stayed your hand. "No, I promise." You pleaded, hoping he could hear the truth in your words. "I don't care that you're a bastard."

"Then why?!" He demanded, another tear rolling down his cheek. "Why would you do that? To me? To us?!"

"Because I thought you were going to leave me!" You cried out. There it was. The painful truth. You never expected him to truly stay. But once you got a taste of him, knew what it was like to be cherished….you never wanted to let him go.

His eyes widened and mouth opened slightly as he took in your words. "What?"

This time it was you who stepped away. You turned your back on him, your stomach churning and for a moment you worried you might vomit. "I've seen you talking lately more with the shieldmaidens, laughing with them, training with them…."

"So, it is jealousy? You decided to get back at me by letting Hvitserk fuck you?" He accused.

"No!" You whipped back around, frustration and sorrow creating an explosive concoction in your heart. "Gods! That's not…."

"What is it then?"

"I figured you were talking to them because you disliked having sex with me and were looking for someone….new. Someone who would be more interesting and knowledgeable and….and prettier. Just, someone not like me."

This time he looked utterly destroyed after your explanation. "What?"

"Why else would you be leaving immediately after we have sex? Or….or stay out so late? I just thought I was becoming boring to you….which I understand…."

"And Hvitserk?"

You shrugged. "He offered to help try and boost my confidence….in the bedroom….hopefully that would make you want to stay. I didn't know he had….feelings until after."

He scrubbed his hands over his face as he heaved a deep sigh. Turning, he placed his hands on the back of a nearby chair as if to ground himself.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Sihtric." You mumbled through your tears, as you pressed a hand to your mouth, desperately trying to suppress the sobs rising up in your throat. "Please just….I'm so sorry."

He shook his head, his voice morose. To your surprise, he chuckled darkly before speaking again. "No, I'm sorry. It's my fault. It's all my fault."

"What? No…."

He turned around, a wetness on his cheeks that had not been there prior. "I should have told you….I just…." His voice trailed off, his gaze dropping to the floor.

"Sihtric? What? Told me what?"

"I love you!" He blurted out.

All the air vanished from your home. Your lungs struggled to expand, leaving your mouth gaping open. A kick to the chest from a horse would have been less painful than his admission. You could only stare at him as his declaration bounced around in your brain but refused to settle. "You….you do?"

Slowly he walked over and tenderly held your hands in his, the battle-hardened calluses a contradiction from your own soft hands. Those dark eyes you loved stayed focused on your clasped hands as he spoke softly. "I know we haven't been together long….but I've known it for a while. You're special. Before you I never wanted to open up, trust was something that was hard. A quick fuck was easy, but to linger, to find myself wanting to hold you in my arms all night, to see your sleepy, sated face in the morning light. That was new. And it scared me. Somehow you changed all that. The more time we spent together, the more I hated to be away from you. That's how I knew….that's how I knew I loved you."

"Why did you never say anything?"

He chuckled, thumbs rubbing on the back of your hands. "I almost did. Gods, so many times. After we'd make love. Sometimes in the morning, seeing you laying in our bed. When I'd come back from training or guard duty and you'd greet me with that sweet smile on your face and a kiss….so many times I had to bite my tongue to keep the words from spilling forth."

Everything clicked in that moment. And if it was possible for your heart to shatter even more, yours surely had. "That's why you would leave….it wasn't because you didn't like me…."

"Never."

"Sihtric, I love you too." You choked out amidst a sob. "I wish you had said something."

"I couldn't."

"Why not?"

Finally, he raised his eyes to meet yours, a smile full of hopelessness on his lips. "Because I knew Hvitserk was in love with you, just as much as you're in love with him."

"But…."

"I know you always said you're best friends, but it's obvious to anyone who looks past the facade. There was always more underneath. The way you two gravitate to each other, the lingering looks and touches, the comfortability there….I always figured I was just someone to pass the time with, until the two of you finally confessed to one another. I just never expected it would be my fault that it'd finally happen."

"Oh Sihtric, I'm so sorry." You cried, no longer able to restrain your sobs. Sihtric pulled you against him, letting you bury your head against his broad chest as you bled out your heartache. With the way his chest rose and fell rapidly and the wetness against your hair, you knew he was silently crying with you. For the miscommunication. For the betrayal. For all the unspoken hopes and dreams both of you had carried, now trampled and laying broken at your feet.

After some time, when both of your tears subsided, you continued to cling to one another like that would somehow stem the outpouring of your bleeding hearts.

The dark-haired Viking broke the silence tainted with misery. "He said he wanted to fight me. For you. Over you. How he can't live without you now….and will do anything to have you."

"Will you?" You cautiously asked, face still pressed to his wet tunic. "Will you fight him?"

"Do you want me too?"

You lifted your head, wanting to see his face as you answered. "I don't want you to fight. Either one of you. I'm not….I'm not worth it."

"You're worth everything." He replied, cupping your cheek so tenderly it caused a fresh wave of tears to fill your eyes.

"Sihtric….please don't. I couldn't bear it if you got hurt….either one of you."

"Then you need to decide."

Your heart stuttered in your chest, your breath catching. "What do you mean?"

"Y/n, my love…." He rubbed his thumb over your cheek, collecting the evidence of your sorrow. "You have to choose one of us."

You shook your head. "I don't….I can't….Sihtric."

His thumb continued to run along your cheek as he gazed at you, a swirl of emotions in his eyes that pierced you like an arrow. After a long moment, he nodded and dropped his hand. "I'll leave. Let you think in peace. Just know….whatever your decision, I'll respect it."

"Sihtric…." You begged, but what more could you say?

After pressing a lingering kiss to your forehead, he released you from his strong arms. He stared at you helplessly, further shredding any remnants of your heart left. With that, he quickly turned and walked away, snatching his sword belt off the table, not even bothering to take the time to put it on before he was out the door.

Soon as the door softly closed behind him, you dropped to the ground with soul-wracking sobs.

It was selfish, you knew. There were two handsome, perfect men both asking for your devotion, both desiring you, both wanting you to choose them over the other. How could you possibly choose? You wanted them both. Needed them both. It was so selfish.

But it was the gods-forsaken truth.

*****

You cried yourself to sleep that night.

And the next night, when Sihtric did not return home.

Hvitserk found you the next morning, still lying in bed. Your throat was hoarse from all your crying and your eyes felt permanently dry and red-rimmed. Curled under your furs in your thin shift, the desire to leave your warm nest was nonexistent. Food and drink had barely passed your lips. You knew it was all your own fault. Yet you wallowed in your misery, unable to escape its tenacious pull. Your thoughts swirled like a cyclone in your mind, a force of destruction you could not flee from. No matter how much you wanted to.

For how could you choose one over the other?

Without a word, he crawled into the bed with you, tucking your body against his in a warm embrace. Without a second thought you melted against him, desperate for the safe haven he provided in the stormy seas of your mind. Your full figure snuggled against his lean form in a way that was effortless, like your bodies were made for this embrace. Exhausted from your lack of sleep and excessive crying, it did not take long for you to drift in and out of sleep, sniffling pathetically when awake. He never commented on your deplorable state of being, just held you tight, an anchor in your waves.

"My sweet," Hvitserk kissed the top of your head as he soothingly ran a hand up and down your back, "don't cry. The Norns will decide."

"Please don't fight him, please Hvitserk. I couldn't take it if either of you were injured."

"Hmmm….what did he say?"

You sniffled pathetically, throat raw as you spoke. "He said I had to choose."

"And?" He encouraged quietly.

"Oh, Serk, I'm so selfish." You lamented, gripping the front of his tunic, now ruined by your tears. "Thor strike me down! I can't. I can't choose. I love you both. Gods, I'm so selfish."

This would be the reason for him to walk away. You were sure of it. Even after all of your years of friendship, you were unable to choose him over your lover, someone you had only known for two years. Why would the blond prince stay? There were plenty of women who would willingly fill his bed. Why would he waste his time on someone like you?

And Sihtric. Someone who clearly gave you their all- their trust, their love, their hopes and dreams. Surely, he could easily find someone new. Someone better than you. Why would he fight for you?

How selfish were you to hurt both of these men you loved….and for some reason they loved you too.

Suddenly, you felt him nuzzle your hair. "You love me?" He whispered.

"Yes."

He hummed, a hand drawing random patterns on your back as if in thought. "And you love him?"

"Yes." You choked out, a fresh wave of remorse and self-loathing crashing over you.

Gently, he tipped your face up to draw you into a kiss. A soft press of mouths, urging you to respond, to sink into the comfort he so willingly offered. You clung to him as your lips moved in tandem, seeking the momentarily solace provided.

You pulled back eventually, opening your eyes to meet his green orbs. "Serk?"

"It'll all work out, beautiful. You'll see." He assured with a smile, drawing you back to his sweet lips.

Even with his confident words, you were left unsure if you could believe him.

Or if your fractured heart could even try.

Part 3

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fandomlovingfreak · 3 years ago

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Summoned

Chapter 1: Summoned

Sebastian de Poitiers x OC

Rating: E for everyone

Word Count: 1661

MasterList Link I Wattpad Link I AO3

Summary: Summoned, to bid to come : send for

When a letter is received from an old friend summoning her for an unspoken favor, Isobel must set sail from her father's home in Scotland, unsure if she will ever see the shores of the country she loves, ever again. French Court, something whispered about by her and her friends as young girls seem frightening to Isobel. Yet, destiny awaits her in Mary's secret favor.

Disclaimer: The characterizations of characters from Reign (based on historical figures) are all the property of the CW Historical Romance show, Reign created by Laurie McCarthy and Stephanie SenGupta (these characters include but are not limited to Sebastian de Poitiers, King Francis, Mary Queen of Scots). This work has not been created for profit or financial compensations, and is a transformative fair use work in accordance with Section 107 of the United States Copyright Act.

CW nor the creators of Reign do not own my original character Isobel.

Notes: I’ve been reworking this fic for a while. I hope to bring it to life as I’ve quite literally been writing it off and on since 2019!

Enjoy

Dear Isobel,

I would like to be summoning you under different circumstances, but I find myself needing you at this hour. I cannot disclose too much information within this letter, as we are still uncertain whether or not the English are intercepting our letters, but I beg you to make haste.

I await your arrival at French Court.

Your friend,

Mary Queen of Scots

I've read and re-read the letter from my dear friend at least two dozen times since departing from the shores of Scotland. Reading was a wonderful escape from the thoughts that I may never see these shores again, something my father had drilled into my head a thousand times before I left. He was certain I'd find a match in France, hopeful that the Queen of Scotland was arranging the details as I traveled.

I myself am nervous about the implications of the letter... of the summoning from Mary. Where my father saw hope, I saw dread-- or at least unexpected news.

But she spoke of something important, and I couldn't just ignore her pleads to come to her Court. Last I'd heard, she'd married her long-awaited fiance, Francis, and gone on a long honeymoon tour. What on earth would have her summoning me of all people at this moment?

***

Everything is splendid

I think to myself as I look around the halls of the castle. The people are even dressed splendidly.

I am greeted by my old friends Kenna, Greer, and Lola, who all talk animatedly about my arrival before I am hurried off to Mary's bed-chamber for the purpose of my summoning.

She greets me just as our other friends had, warmly, with smiles and small talk. I did miss her, more than I originally thought I did, as I see she's become more Queenly than ever before. Technically, I suppose, she was more a Queen than ever now that she and her husband had officially been crowned King and Queen of France.

"Come sit, please." Mary situates us by a glowing fire, asking if I'd like a refreshment of any sort. I decline, feeling I can't wait another moment. I must know why I am in France.

Mary looks down at her hands, suddenly looking as if she'd rather not be doing this, "Yes, well. I must ask you to do something I feel uneasy asking of you--"

I take Mary's hand in mine, "what is it?" Her tone is almost unreadable, but her eyes tell me I should be nervous.

Mary takes a deep breath of air, "I must ask you to stay here in France and-- marry Francis's brother, Sebastian de Poitiers."

I feel the color drain from my cheeks, "Marry--?"

My Queen has the decency to look embarrassed as she searches for words, "Francis's half-brother."

"The late King's bastard son? That Sebastian? Mary, I don't understand--"

"I know that-- I know how your father would react, will react if you agree to help me, but please listen to me, Isobel. I have good reason to ask for your help." After a moment, I nod, urging her to tell me the point of this-- suggestion.

"I'm not sure what you've heard about my past year in the French court, so I'll start from the beginning." I listen to her retell the problems they've had. The Queen Mother's meddling, the prophecy of Francis's death if he married Mary, the ploy to get Sebastian legitimized by the Vatican. All of the details are poured out for me to better understand Mary's odd request.

"I don't understand how you could have even-- I mean, Mary. He's the King's bastard. Your mother would have never allowed it..."

"And she fought it and won. I know that it seems crazy, but I love Francis. I would do anything to keep him from death, even marry a man I--" she flushes. I can see there were feelings even if she chose one brother over the other.

"Oh, Mary..."

Mary sighs, "I know it's a lot to ask of you, Isobel, but Sebastian is my friend, and it's the only way Francis will feel... he can let Sebastian stay in court-- if he's married and settled down with his own wife."

I look down at my hands, embarrassed to be asking such a question, "How would this affect me in court, Mary?" How can I turn down my Queen's requests, though? I have to do what is right for the country, even if the country she's asking me for aid from is her husband's.

"Francis has agreed to give Sebastian a title, a small one but a title nonetheless, and an estate that will be available if you wish to escape French Court for a time during each year. Bash is a bastard, but that won't destroy you under Francis's care."

"And has Sebastian agreed to this?"

Mary hesitates, "He has not." I thought as much, "but it's the only option for him. He'll see reason. Sebastian is very reasonable, Isobel. That's one of the reasons why I thought of you when this predicament came up. I often think he is a reflection of you in ways."

My father's potential thoughts and opinions plague my mind, keeping me silent as she waits for my answer.

"I know I'm asking a lot of you, Isobel." Silence chokes out the conversation.

"Can I think it over, Mary?"

"Yes. If you need me to, I will send your father's word. I'll tell him it was for the good of the alliance between Scotland and France. Anything you need, Isobel." Her hand grasps mine, pleading with me.

With a nod, I agree to be quick with my answer.

***

The halls are near empty as I walk slowly towards the room prepared for me by my dearest friends Kenna, Lola, and Greer.

Worries come in and out of my brain rapidly. I fear for the fall in my reputation, then feel awful for thinking of another so lowly. Sebastian could very much be a wonderful man, and I'm sure he is if Mary held such a high opinion of him. She wouldn't have entertained marriage with a man if she did not believe him to be a truly wonderful person, I'm certain of it. But, that did not change the fact that he existed somewhat outside of polite company.

Sitting on the large bed, I fold my hands tightly on my lap in worry. If I agree to marry, I will be directly aiding my Queen and helping create peace within both of our countries. Francis was technically now the King of Scotland. On the other hand, I would be marrying someone I don't know, which frightens me. Not to mention I will someday have to face my family, who may blame me for pulling them down with me if all of this backfires and I become some sort of social pariah.

Feeling thoroughly exhausted by all of this thinking, I flop back onto the bed.

In the end, I do trust Mary. I don't believe that she would purposefully lead me astray, and she seemed genuine and confident that Sebastian and I could be a match. A good one at that.

With newly found resolve, I wake early and dress before making my way to Mary's bed-chamber. I need to-- before I chicken out and run home to my father. I can be brave.

"Isobel," Mary's voice is full of surprise, "is something the matter?" She takes a few steps towards me

"I've thought it over, Mary," I take a large calming breath, sealing my fate, "I will marry him."

She stands looking at me for a beat before taking a few steps to embrace me, "Thank you, Isobel. Thank you. You can't understand how grateful I am." She pulls back, looking deadly serious, "I promise you that I personally will send word to your father and make him know this was my doing. You will receive no backlash; you have been kind and selfless. I promise you that you will be taken care of under both the Scottish and French crowns."

I smile, pulling her back into a hug, "Thank you, Mary."

"Don't thank me at all. You are doing an enormous, insane favor for me."

"I trust you, you know that? I don't believe you would let me marry someone horrible."

"He isn't! Sebastian is wonderful. He's thoughtful and kind, a little pigheaded, but what man isn't a bit stubborn?" I laugh at her words. "And think of this! You and I shall be related by marriage."

I smile kindly, not wanting to burst her bubble... In many's views, a bastard, even one close to his half-siblings, is not a true sibling.

***

Sebastian looks between Mary and his half-brother, "you can't be serious."

Francis's eyes hold that hatred. The one reserved specifically for Sebastian that has developed since Mary came to Court.

"It's the only solution, Sebastian. I will never feel comfortable with your return to Court-- living near my wife if you remain a bachelor."

He snorts at the ridiculousness of the idea, "If I agree to marry a complete stranger, you will somehow gain comfort?" The venom in his voice pulses through each syllable.

Unluckily, Francis matches his frustration, his tone turning just as icy, "You will be too preoccupied with your own wife and new station to continue lusting over my wife. Your Queen." Mary looks at her husband with concern, a look he used to be on the receiving end of. Sebastian looks away with disgust... no sadness. Some vile emotion that he detests feeling.

"Please, Bash," Mary tries to soothe the pain, "Isobel has agreed. She's wonderful. She will make an excellent wife for you."

Sebastian sighs, running his fingers through his hair, "Can I meet her first? I would like to meet her before you force us to marry, please."

Mary and Francis look between each other.

"I can arrange that."

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imaginethathaikyuu · 4 years ago

Text

kinktober - day ten

atsumu miya - promise

kinktober faq kinktober prompt list

NSFW warning featuring: protected sex, dirty talk, fingering, first time together, atsumu being absolutely so horny for u

other tags: mentions of past partners, mentions of reader having a bad first time having sex, mentions of feelings of apprehension about having sex, insecurity caused by a past partner, established relationship, building trust, reassurance, atsumu being out of character for the sake of my own comfort, he just loves u a lot ok?

fem reader

(sorry this is out late! i got behind because i took a trip out of town over the weekend. i’ll get back on track sometime this week!) word count: 2936

For what felt like the first time - but definitely wasn’t - looking into Atsumu’s eyes left you feeling nothing but apprehensive.

And he could tell.

“You know I’m not gonna hurt you, right?”

You shrugged. “I don’t know.” It was honest, maybe too honest, but you’d rather tell the truth than avoid your feelings. And Atsumu didn’t care about how your words made him feel.

“We don’t have to do this,” he said, and he was already getting off of you and sitting up straight. “Come on, let’s just go watch a movie.”

“Don’t you want to do it?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

But it did - the only thing that mattered to you was figuring out if your boyfriend really wanted you.

“I just want to know if you really want me,” you argued. “How am I supposed to know if you mean it or not?”

“God, you’re frustrating,” he said with a scoff as he pulled you to sit up with him. “I only want what you want. How many times do I have to tell you that?”

You didn’t reply. Atsumu didn’t like that.

“Look at me.”

You didn’t want to, but you looked up at him anyway.

“Of course I want you - of course I really want to do this. But I don’t give a shit about what I want, alright? If you don’t want to have sex yet, how can I want it?”

“I do want it,” you insisted, but it wasn’t convincing.

“You don’t have to want it, doll.”

“I do,” you said. “But that doesn’t mean I’m not scared.”

“Why are you scared?” he asked, “What are you afraid of?”

It was a heavy question; Atsumu regretted asking it the moment the words fell from his lips, because he already knew the answer.

“Okay, you don’t have to answer that,” he said, attempting to fix the situation, but it was going to take more. You knew that.

“I just want to be good enough for you - I’m not as experienced as you, Atsumu, and the only time I’ve done it -”

“I know.”

It was quiet. The annoyance in Atsumu’s voice made you recoil.

He released a fiery breath, and took your chin into his hands. “I’m not your ex, okay? Fuck that guy - it pisses me off to even think about him. You didn’t deserve how he treated you - you deserved to have the first time you wanted. But I’m not like him - I’m not just going to fuck you and leave - I’m not a fucking scumbag. I don’t care how experienced you are, or even about anyone I’ve ever fucked. I want you - bad - but I want you to be comfortable more. I would wait forever because it’s worth the wait, and even if you never want to do it, it wouldn’t matter to me. I’m not dating you for sex, alright? Do you hear me?”

“Yes, ‘Tsumu,” you said, giggling at his heartfelt lecture. “I hear you.”

You repeated his words to yourself because you knew you needed to remember them; your past doesn’t define your present, and you wanted to let go of your fears and trust Atsumu in the way you yearned to. You deserved better, and you trusted he would treat you better.

“Good.” He sealed it with a quick kiss, then said, “just tell me what you want to do, and we’ll do it. Whatever you want.”

“I want you,” you said honestly. “I want to do this with you - I just want to be good enough.”

Atsumu scoffed again, “You are good enough,” and pulled you closer with his hands around your waist. “Let me show you - let me prove it, baby.”

He pulled you in for a kiss, one that was as deep as it was sweet; he kissed you slow and patient, giving you every opportunity to pull away.

But you had no plans to do that, and when he pushed you to lie back, you did.

“If you want to stop, just tell me,” he said, keeping his voice low. “This is about you, alright? Only about you - we’ll only do what you want to do.”

You felt small underneath him, and you wanted to give in to that feeling. You were comfortable, and you wanted to let yourself be comfortable. The way he was looming over you made you feel something, and you wanted more of that.

Yet, still, just to be sure, you asked, “Promise?”

He gave you a pretty grin, one that you knew was genuine. “I promise,” he replied, leaving kisses on your neck in the wake of his words. “I’d never hurt you. I only wanna make you feel good.”

You nodded, quietly laughing because his lips were tickling your neck.

“God, you’re cute,” he said, and you kept laughing.

“Promise?”

“You know you’re cute,” he argued. “Yeah, I promise.”

“You’re just saying that.”

“You’ll see,” he said as his hands trailed underneath your shirt. “I’ll show you what you do to me, doll.”

And you were ready for it. For some reason, something about that night felt right. Atsumu was as patient and caring and kind that night as he’d always been - he’d never failed to try his best to comfort you. But, yet, something about right then was different.

You were still apprehensive, still nervous, still insecure. Those feelings hadn’t gone away - Atsumu couldn’t change that. But at the same time, you were feeling things you never had: excitement, desire, arousal.

And when he settled between your legs and you felt him against you, you were sure that you wanted to do this. You knew you wanted him.

He was kissing you again while his hand moved deeper into your shirt. “Can I touch you?” And immediately, you nodded.

He touched you carefully, holding your breast over your bra with care. It was almost too soft, but you loved it - it’s what you needed.

It was hard for him to keep it up, to take this slow, because of how badly he needed you. He wanted to see you and touch you and feel you, all of you, but he couldn’t - not yet, not until he knew you wanted it just as much as him.

So he would push it a bit farther, just to see how you felt. “Do you want me to take my shirt off?”

He saw the way your eyes lit up, and he knew what your answer would be before you gave it. “Yeah - please.”

He smirked down at you, “Help me out, doll,” and he watched as your shy hands grabbed the hem of his shirt. You pulled it off slowly, and Atsumu had to ask, “You alright?”

“Yeah,” you replied with a shaky breath. “A little overwhelmed.”

“In a good way?”

You thought for a second, and you responded with your heart. “Yeah, ‘Tsumu, in a good way - I want you.”

And he loved to hear it - it brought him out of his shell, it brought his confidence back. He didn’t need to treat you like you were going to break, he didn’t need to be too soft. He just needed to be himself, to give you all of him, because that’s what you wanted. Atsumu knew how to treat you right, and that’s what he was going to do.

“I want you,” he said back. “I want you, I want to touch you, can I?”

The way you replied was by unbuttoning your pants, and it was the only response Atsumu needed. He kissed you again, just to settle his excitement and bring himself back down to earth, while you pushed your pants off.

“We can go slow,” he told you. His fingers were digging into your hips, his own need for you was growing.

And you pushed his hand lower, because your curiosity and desire were becoming too much. You wanted to be touched by him; you wanted to feel good because of him.

He did touch you, over your underwear, just barely. And he was the one moaning at the feeling - you were so warm, and already wet for him.

“Fuck, you’re gonna feel so good,” he mumbled.

He touched you harder, circling in different spots until he found the right one. Your quiet moans drove him crazy - it made him need so much more, and he knew you did, too.

“Gonna take these off,” he said as he tugged on your underwear. “Is that alright?”

“Yeah,” you nodded.

Before he pulled your underwear off, he had to ask you, “How far do you wanna go tonight, baby?”

He watched your face as you thought of an answer, and he realized that he may have been pushing you too much. This was going fast, and he hardly realized it until the two of you were sitting in silence.

So he continued, “We don’t have to fuck, if you don’t want to.”

You had to laugh at the vulgarity of his words - they were stark in comparison to how softly he’d been speaking to you all night.

But as soon as he asked the question, you immediately had your answer. “I want to go all the way.”

You knew you wanted it - you knew you were ready to do this again; despite having a terrible first time before you met Atsumu, you weren’t thinking about the past. You were only thinking about him.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

He kissed you, then said, “Promise?”

You smiled up at him, “I promise,” then proved your words with another kiss. It was confident and meaningful - you didn’t need to say anything else.

He pulled your underwear off easily, then spread your legs and saw you for the first time, and your desire to be touched outweighed any insecurity you had about being left bare.

“You’re fucking perfect,” Atsumu said, and his words hit you like hot water. “I can’t wait to bury myself into you - fuck, your cunt is perfect, baby.”

He knew he was testing his limits, but he couldn’t help it. He was lost in the sight of you, lying there with nothing but his t-shirt on, half naked in front of him for the first time. And you were embarrassed, he could tell - but he could also see the positive effect he had on you. He liked it.

Atsumu could be selfish, he knew that. But if you didn’t have a problem with it, neither did he.

You felt his fingers on you, they were searching for your entrance - he had completely forgotten to warn you until he already had a knuckle inside you.

“This okay?”

“Yeah,” you said, and he couldn’t tell if your high pitch was because you were surprised, because it felt good, or both.

This pace was killing him - he spent a good five minutes pumping one finger into you before he added another, and from the moment your moans started he knew he couldn’t take waiting any longer.

But he would. And he’d add a third finger, just because he knew you could take it, and he’d make you cum as many times as it took before you were begging for more. He could only imagine how good it would feel to have you squeezing around his cock, how proud of himself he’d be as you were cumming for him, how amazing it’d be to finally have that experience with you after waiting for so long.

And that’s what he was thinking about when he felt you tightening around his curling fingers, when he heard you give a warning for your orgasm in the form of his name.

The only way you could describe the feeling was purely delightful - it lasted longer than you thought an orgasm could, and you felt that familiar tingling sensation across your entire body.

It was the first time another person had ever made you cum, and as soon as it was over, you wanted to feel it again.

“Good girl,” Atsumu praised you, “you’re such a good girl, baby - you look so pretty when you cum, you know that?”

You whined his name as he kept uttering praise, as his fingers continued to fuck you. He was holding back on purpose, just to tease you, and you didn’t like it.

You pulled on his hand to encourage him to pull his fingers out of you, and he complied.

“Please,” you flat out begged, “please, Atsumu, I want more - I wanna cum again, please fuck me.”

He shushed you, shamelessly tugging his shorts down as he spoke. “I know, doll, you don’t gotta beg me for it - let me get ready for it first, be patient - I’ll give you whatever you want.”

You didn’t want to, but you waited for him as he completely undressed, trying to be as patient as you could. He got up for just a second to put on a condom and lubricant, but it felt like hours in your needy state.

But he got back to you quickly, and he was ready to give you what both of you needed.

“Gonna put it in now,” he told you with a kiss on your cheek. “Is that alright?”

“Please,” you said, and the sound inflated Atsumu’s ego more than he’d admit.

“If you want me to stop, tell me, and I’ll stop,” he said, sounding serious in a way he hadn’t all night. “If it doesn’t feel good or if it hurts, say so, so I can make you feel good - okay?”

His words only reassured you even more; they reminded you that you were safe, cared about, and loved by the man above you. You weren’t just an object to him - you mattered to him as much as he mattered to you.

So you said, “Okay,” because you didn’t need to say anything else, and he kissed you as if to tell you that he was as ready as you were.

He pulled your legs high around his waist, and carefully, slowly, the tip of his cock found your cunt and sunk in. It was a stretch, but in the best way. You pulled him deeper into you with your legs because you couldn’t help it - you didn’t even realize you had done it - and that’s when you felt it sting.

And Atsumu could tell he’d hurt you, “Fuck, baby, that’s too fast - don’t do that,” and he tried pulling out but you held him in place with your legs.

“Just don’t move,” you said, focusing on the feeling of having him in you and not the pain you had caused yourself - it was already wearing off; in seconds, you felt comfortable again, so you told him, “Okay - I’m okay, babe.”

He gave a barely there thrust just to test it out, and when he didn’t hear you wince, he took it as a good sign. He let his head fall to your shoulder as his pace slightly sped up, as he tried getting used to this feeling.

“Fucking hell, it’s a tight fit,” he groaned, and he felt you squeeze around him in response to his words, making him hum a loud moan.

He couldn’t help snapping his hips against yours - he felt like he had no control over his movements, especially when your quiet moans turned into loud ones.

Atsumu was needy; he was chasing his own pleasure and was glad to hear your moans only get louder. He was doing something right in his blissed out daze, because in minutes you were asking him if you could cum.

“You don’t gotta ask,” he said. “Just cum, baby, whenever you feel it. Just let go, cum all over my cock, make a mess - I’ll be right behind you.”

He rubbed your clit to ensure you’d get there quicker, and that was all you needed from him to cum again. You really let go and you had never felt better - Atsumu did the same, cumming right after you.

It was comforting and warm, long and bright, vibrant and free. The only reason you would ever want it to end was so that you could experience the trip getting there again.

And then, for the both of you, that euphoric high was gone, as quickly as it had arrived, but the way you felt afterwards was just as good.

Atsumu left your side only to toss away the condom - he was back before you could blink.

“Are you okay?” he asked after seeing how breathless you were. He knew it was a good sign, but he had to be sure.

You pulled him close to you and he wrapped you up in his arms, hardly caring that you were a sweaty mess. You didn’t reply, and he wasn’t sure what that meant.

“I’m not going anywhere, I promise,” he said, reassuring you without even knowing if you needed it. But he needed to do it - he needed you to hear his words and know he meant them. “I’m right here - you were perfect, doll, just like I knew you would be.”

You didn’t get caught up in your fears, because Atsumu wouldn’t let you. Not when you were in his arms, hearing him say things he wanted to tell you.

When it came to you, he was only ever honest. He’d never lie to you in the way he often lied to his brother; he’d never play you like a game of volleyball. He could only be himself, in the truest way possible, and both of you knew that.

And that’s why you knew that, in the morning, he’d still be right there next to you, just like he promised.

tune in tomorrow for kinktober day 11: touch starved

#kinktober 2020 #not family friendly #miya atsumu #miya atsumu x reader #atsumu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader

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sirthisisa-wendys · 4 years ago

Text

The General (Part 6): Geto Suguru x Fem!Reader

synopsis: the search for a new place to settle has begun, but you’re left searching for a reason for Geto to stay.

wc: 1.9k

tw: none

a/n: shorter chapter, but I have something super-sweet in the works for the upcoming parts because *you know I love sweets and lemons*

masterlist

“I cannot have you like I want to.”

The words the General spoke the night before ring fresh in your mind as Kaori goes about her task of washing and preparing you for the day. He had left before you awoke, but you know you’ll see him at some point during the day. It seems that his explanation will have to wait, then.

“You’re very quiet today, Lady y/n,” Kaori whispers, pouring water down your back. “Did something happen?”

Could you tell her the truth? Could you tell her what the General said and what you did in response?

“Nothing’s wrong; I’m just tired today.”

“I’m sure you can catch up on your rest after we see Haibara and Gojo off.”

“They leave today?” you ask, turning around to face her.

“We have to move quickly these days.” Kaori states, her face grim. “We can’t waste a single day as we get closer to the Imperial Palace.”

“What will happen when we get there?” You wonder aloud, and Kaori shakes her head.

“No, you’re not thinking like a warrior, my Lady.” Kaori stands and you do the same, placing the towel around your frame. “The question is not what we’ll do when we get there. It’s what will happen before we get there.” Your frown smooths out into a look of understanding, and suddenly, a headache begins to set in. Any number of things could occur before you arrived at the Imperial Palace, and a great many of those things could be terrible for both you and Geto.

“You needn’t worry, my Lady. Master Geto has a plan for everything. We just need to follow his orders, and everything will work out fine.”

_______________________________________________________________________

Your mouth is full of grilled fish when you feel the familiar chubby fingers of Yuji Itadori on your arm. You look down at the toddler with expectation of more food being pressed to your lips - despite it being lunchtime - but instead, he’s holding a dandelion.

“Make a wish!” You laugh, then close your eyes, searching for something to wish for. When you find it, you send it up to whatever gods are listening, and then blow on the dandelion with all of the breath in your lungs.

Yuji lets out an astonished whoa and then watches the little spores blow away in the light breeze. “Nobara!” he calls out, running away. “We need more dandy-lions!” The two children dash off into the field, and you wonder about the brain cell they share before Kaori and her other friend hiss your name.

“Lady y/n, he’s coming,” Kaori points toward the three men striding toward your small group, and you perk up at the sight of Geto. His eyes are on you, and at the contact, he smiles widely.

“Are you enjoying your meal, ladies?” Haibara asks, trailing behind Geto and Gojo.

“Yes, the fish is heavenly,” Kaori replies eagerly. “Give the cook our best.”

“Will do,” he answers, and Geto sits beside you on the blanket.

“Might I try a piece?” he inquires, and you oblige, feeding him with your fingers just like he has done to you many times. When his mouth makes contact with your fingers, you feel his tongue slide against the tips of them and for a moment, you wish he wouldn’t let go. But he does, and hums as he eats the fish thoughtfully. You smile at him and he returns the expression, placing his hand on yours before turning back to the two men who are left standing.

“I’ll see you two in a few hours.” Gojo and Haibara take off, followed by Kaori and her friend - who wags her eyebrows at you before leaving the two of you alone in the field. You want to run your hands through Geto’s hair and ask him about his day, ask him about his words the night before, but you keep yourself rooted to where you are. It’s only after a moment of hesitation that Geto closes the gap between you and pulls you into his chest, examining the horizon with wide eyes.

“What is on your mind, great general?” you whisper, and he looks down at you, lips curled up in a half-smile.

“Would you believe me if I said it’s you?”

“I would,” you answer. He exhales slowly, the smile dropping from his face before he returns his gaze to the horizon.

“I must confess that you have placed me in quite a predicament, little one,” he begins, placing a kiss at the top of your head and smoothing a hand down your spine.

“Oh?”

“Don’t play coy.” Your laughter peals out across the field like bells in the wind, and Geto chuckles as well, his shoulders shaking as he bends over a little.

“And this… predicament… Is this the one you spoke of last night?” You were pulling answers out of him, but it seems only right for you to have to search for the truth. Because, somewhere in that truth, you know you’ll find your own version of what you felt for him.

“The very same one... I want to have you, y/n; I want to make you mine.”

“And what’s stopping you?” Geto inhales deeply, all of the laughter from before vanishing from his face in an instant.

“I made a promise to myself on your behalf. I swore I would not take you to bed and - instead - preserve your maidenhood for whomever you choose to be with. My plan has always been to release you to your freedom in the end.” Your shock is evident by the way you lean away from him, but Geto makes no move to pull you in again. He eyes you carefully as you process his words, unsure of how to react.

“So, I am only a pawn to you.” Realization sweeps over Geto’s features, smoothing them out to a wide-eyed gaze as he shakes his head.

“No, no, little one,” He reaches a hand out and grazes your cheek with the back of his knuckles, the gesture making you close your eyes and instinctively lean into his touch again. “I want you to be happy. If your happiness is not here with m-- with us, then I will not force you to stay when I become Emperor. You will be afforded all of the privileges of a free woman, as you were before.”

“But…” You capture his hand on your cheek, pressing a kiss to his palm. “What if I have found some happiness here with you?”

“I would be elated to have you accompany me, if that is the truth.”

“Why would I lie to you?” The side-eye Geto gives you makes you chuckle, and you lean into his arm again, thinking about the warmth of his body and how he feels so familiar now. He always smells like fresh rain, and the way spoke to you never bordered on disrespectful or harsh. At least, not anymore. “Geto, I--”

“I know what you’re going to say,” he interrupts, holding a finger up to your lips. “But I haven’t divulged everything yet.” You wait for his second round of speech, holding your breath. “Should I be overcome, and my father wins the war… I am also saving your maidenhood so you can be spared. If it comes out that you have lain with me, I know my family will not hesitate to have you murdered.”

“Your father wouldn’t do such a barbaric thi-”

“You don't know my father. Nor do you know my half-brothers. They are ruthless, y/n. And if my father will not have you punished for being the mistress of a traitor, I know that my brothers will not hesitate.” The breath escapes your lungs slowly and Geto looks down at you again, fixing you with his onyx eyes. “And so I ask you this: would you be satisfied with possibly losing your life for being with a traitor to the crown? Or would you rather resist the temptation, and live a long life with few regrets?” Your hand flies to his chest, right above his heart, and you answer confidently:

“Whichever way the wind blows, I will not regret taking this chance to be with you.” At this, Geto hastily pulls you in for a deep kiss, holding onto you as if the source of life itself is wrapped in the sinew of your bones.

______

“Safe travels, brother.” You observe Geto and Gojo - equal in stature but differing in composure - clasp arms before Geto turns to Haibara and repeats the motion; pulling him in and whispering something in his ear. Haibara pulls away and laughs, smiling widely before they climb onto their white horses. A group of soldiers are waiting for them as they ride off into the horizon, leaving the entire camp behind as the hooves of the beasts kick up massive amounts of dust.

You shield yourself behind Geto’s broad frame as they depart, and the other members of the gathered crowd disperse easily, leaving the two of you standing in the field with Nanami. “Master Geto,” Nanami begins, and Geto turns away from the disappearing figures to face the youth.

“Yes, Nanami?”

“It has come to my attention that Emissary Noritoshi made it back to the Imperial Palace, and was immediately thrown out upon the Emperor’s realization that he had not secured a deal with you.”

“Will they be sending another emissary, then?”

“Within the week, sir.” You examine Geto’s face as he wraps an arm around your waist protectively, squinting his eyes.

“Send for a scout tomorrow morning. I need to know if this emissary is any different from Noritoshi in his tactics.”

“Shall I call upon Yuuta, sir?”

“Yes; he would fare well. Thank you, Nanami.” Nanami bows slightly to Geto, and then to you, departing just as quietly as he had arrived. “And you…” Geto squeezes you closer to him. “You need to get some rest. We will recommence training tomorrow morning, after breakfast.” A groan escapes your lips at the thought of Geto making you fight with a rake again, but you follow him back to the tent anyways.

As you undress for the night, you wonder if Geto is really focusing on his plans or if he’s trying his best not to watch as you disrobe and expose yourself for his eyes again. But when you sneak a glance over your shoulder, he’s wholly focusing on his maps and diagrams, left hand propping his chin up as he faces away from you. Sighing, you dress in your night clothes and slide into bed, wishing that you could just feel his arms wrap around you before you drift off to sleep.

Some god heard you, you realize, as Geto pushes away from his desk and stands, wiping his face in exhaustion. Your body tingles with hyper awareness as Geto trims the wick of the lamps around the tent and shuffles over to the bed, yawning while tossing his haori and hakashita off. The moment he slides in next you and places his large arms around you, you jolt a little, and you feel his warm breath on your skin as he chuckles.

“Easy there, y/n. I’m not going to hurt you.” You turn to face him in the semi-darkness and place both hands on his face.

“I wasn’t worried about that,” you answer, and he hums, pulling you in for another kiss before tapping one to your nose. “Quite the opposite, actually.” Geto replies with a rumble in his chest, hands sliding further down to your ass. But the temptation is quickly overcome when he pulls his hands away, placing them behind his head as he lays on his back.

“You cannot tempt me that easily, little one,” he breathes, exhaling through his nose. “Sleep well; goodnight.” You roll onto your side in defeat, but a small smile plays across both of your faces as you fall asleep, the wheels of imagination and desire turning around and around in your minds.

_______________________________________________________________________

TAGLIST: @kamisamaundercover @jotazinha @just4readingfics @mxhi @sammytamaki @brownskinnedgirll @keelyshayee @leanne-tamashi @vabybizzle @amaris9

#geto x reader #jujutsu kaisen getou #jjk geto #geto suguru #getou x reader #jjk gojo #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen imagines #gojo satoru

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stephspurs · 4 years ago

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A Family Affair | Euro 2020 Football Fanfiction

here is the second last part besties wahhh I'm so sad its coming to an end!! I'm also so sorry about this part, it'll break a few hearts :'( Love always, Steph xx

Part 11 | parte undicesima

warnings; heartbreak, swearing & angst - i'm sorry in advance. word count; 2185 writing tools; third person until dashed line, first person thereafter. final update; Wednesday 18/08 5pm AEST. tags (as requested by users); @footballffbarbiex @obsesseds-world @abysshaven link to fic masterlist here

A few days had passed since the Villa match and Amelia had heard from Jack when he returned to Birmingham. He sent her a simple text to let her know he made it home. That’s it. The two went from previously not going more than 24 hours between FaceTimes or calls or memes to a simple made it home a few hours ago, thanks for a good time x.

No “speak soon”, no promise of a FaceTime , no double kiss at the end of the text that would have typically been there otherwise. If anything, she was more mad that he made her feel like a side piece; like one of his instagram girls that she knew he entertained throughout the week. Amelia knew that she, for lack of better terms, fucked up. She fucked up their friendship, and was praying to all of the Gods that would listen to help her not fuck things up with Ben, too. However, the fact that she didn’t go to church as often as she should have is probably the reason that Ben refused to make eye contact with the girl. It was either that or…he already knew.

“Benj, hey, wait up.” She called as he walked out to his car after a particularly long day at Cobham.

“Don’t call me Benj,” he coldly stated without turning around, continuing his stride.

“Okay fine, Chilly. Wait up will you!”

“Don’t call me Chilly either, that's reserved for friends.”

“Okay, if I can’t call you Benj, or Chilly, what can I call you?”

“The best mate of the guy you fucked multiple times on Saturday night” He spat out at her, as he finally turned around, ready to see the shocked look cast over Amelia’s face as she stood a couple feet away from him. He wasn’t expecting to see Mason at his car, just across the way or Jorgi at his, a few cars down. But they were there and it didn’t matter; they were going to find out sooner or later, anyway.

“He told you.”

“He told the group chat, Amelia. The fucking group chat! How does that make you feel? He’s already bragging about it. Your bed isn't even cold yet! It probably doesn’t bother you that much though - you’re just like him.”

“He fucked you when he knew exactly how I felt about you, having gone to him for advice as to how to apologise to you. I called him on Friday after I left your house and gushed to him like a bloody little girl because I was so happy you forgave me, and that we had kissed. And then, just like that, you let him weasel his way between your legs.”

“I know I should be taking this out on him, and I will don’t worry, but you knew what you were doing also. You knew exactly how I felt about you. I was ready to commit to you that night and you said you wanted to be friends, that you needed time to heal or whatever. So I hope you’re happy and are healing, because I take it all back.” With that, Ben turned around and got in his car, driving away from the girl who felt remorse worse than she ever has in her life.

Witnessing the whole exchange, Jorgi gave Mason a nod to say “go check on Ben, I’ll look after Amelia” and walked up to the girl from behind. Without scaring her, he firmly grabbed her around the shoulders and pulled her to his chest where she let go of all of the emotions she had been keeping inside. With every stab of the knife that was Ben’s words, she felt herself becoming more vulnerable and exposed than ever before. She refused to let him see her cry. That wasn’t something she was willing to let anyone see; she didn’t realise all she had been holding together until she no longer had to, until she had the physical support of Jorgi holding her up in the middle of the training ground car park.

Ushering her to his car - she could collect her own another day - Jorgi put her inside before any other first team members - or worse, staff members - could see the distraught girl and drove them both back to her place where he spent the rest of the evening comforting the girl and letting her know she wasn’t alone. He had even made a desperate call to Fede, asking for advice on how to cheer the girl up. Of course, her Italian ex-lover had been worried the moment his national teammate had told him that the girl was inconsolable and was just about ready to board a flight to her, but Jorgi had calmed him down too. Fede’s advice of coffee, warm pyjamas and clean sheets had done the trick of putting the girl to sleep for the night.

The next few days had come and gone, and the two heartbroken almost-lovers were back to the beginning - Ben ignoring Amelia and Amelia trying to get Ben in a room. But it wasn’t to be. Towards the end of the week, Amelia had received a phone call from Mr Mancini, formally inviting her back to the Italian National Team staff for the upcoming friendly matches and preparation for the 2022 World Cup. Without any hesitation, she accepted her role and began to prepare the necessary procedures that would need to be implemented or maintained during her time away with the Italian side.

Sharing the news with her fellow Italians, Jorgi and Emerson, she decided that she wanted to be the one to tell Ben. She wanted him to know, whether he cared or not, that she wasn’t running away from him and that she would see him soon.

“Chilwell, please stay behind after the session.” She decided it was best if she requested it in the company of the rest of the first team and also the staff members. She was being selfish but she didn’t want him to run away from her again.

He remained sat in his seat as the rest of the team and professional staff left for the evening. Arms crossed, slouched down, looking at everything else in the room but the girl who was nervously wringing her hands together.

“I’m leaving for international duties tomorrow morning.” With that sentence, he stopped tapping his left leg and looking at the cornice details. Instead, his attention was focused on her.

“But we don’t break up for internationals for another week.”

“I know, but Mancini has requested I come earlier to settle back into things over there.”

“It’s only an hour flight away, how difficult could it be?”

“I thought you’d be happy to see me go.”

Silence. Ben didn’t have an answer for her. Of course he didn’t want to see her around Cobham on the day-to-day basis they currently had to endure, but that doesn’t mean he wants her to go back to Italy. Even if it was only for a couple of weeks. Especially if it meant she was around Fede again.

“Well, much to your dismay I'll be back here in 3 weeks. And, Italy are playing England in the last friendly match of the break.”

With a slight nod of his head, Amelia presumed that their conversation was done with. She turned to gather her paperwork and heard the chairs behind her move, followed by the sound of the door opening and closing. She sighed into her hands. How did she let this happen? She preached to Ben how much she didn’t want to be selfish with his heart, and that's exactly what she did. But hey, it takes two to tango. Deciding there was no time like the present, she dialed the contact that once made her smirk but instead only made her furious to look at.

“Amelia, hey, how are you? Sorry it’s been a hectic couple of weeks.”

“Cut the crap Jack, you never intended to keep this friendship after you got what you were after.”

“Excuse me? You wanted it just as bad as I did.”

“You’re right about that, I thought I wanted it. Now, though, all I feel is regret. You know Jack, I knew from the moment we met that you were just my type, the kind that only calls me late at night. I knew a guy like you, and he treated me more or less the same. I gave myself to him, over and over for the better part of 3 years, and it was only when I left that he decided I might have been worth it... worth him.”

“But not you, you couldn’t help but run to your group chat and brag about your latest conquest, about how you made me feel wanted, only to rip it all out from under me the next morning and every day since. Honestly Jack, I think it's time you grew up a little. For Ben to confide in you how he was feeling and for you to just have blatant disregard for your so-called best mate. I can’t believe you would stoop so low. I know I'm in the wrong here too, but you are his best mate for crying out loud! How could you do this to him?”

“I don’t even want to hear what you have to say, I just needed to get that off my chest. Lose my number Jack, find some other hopeless girl that you can lure in with your foolish words and sweet nothings because I’m done. I’m done with whatever this was to you.”

______________________________________________________________

“You’re probably not going to believe me, but you have no idea how happy I am to see you here,” I heard from behind me, spinning around on my heels to see the ever-charming, boyish grin I used to love with my whole heart. This time, it's a different kind of love - it's an unconditional love shared between two people that are glad to exist together in the same crazy world.

“Federico, amore mio.” (Federico, my love) I stood up from my place on the bench at the Technical Headquarters and Training Ground of the Italian Football Federation, bringing the taller, heavily tattooed man into my arms. A gentle rock from him, side to side, to let me know that he can feel the weight of my moral compass.

“Vieni, cammina con me” (come, walk with me) He looped our arms together, and we strolled around the perimeter of the pitch that I was using to visualise my plays for the upcoming games. By the time we made it to the first set of goals, Fede had had enough of letting me mull over my own thoughts.

“Tesoro, Jorgi called one night a couple weeks ago. As smart as he is, it turns out he is hopeless at calming down an emotional female. While I'm not proud of knowing exactly how to calm you down, being that it was more often than not my fault you were inconsolable in the first place, I had to get some information out of him as to who upset my favourite girl in all of England.”

So I launched into the story, telling him everything from Mykonos to that fateful night a few weeks ago. Fede being Fede, he wanted to know everything, but I stopped just short of letting him know how many times Jack took me to paradise (much to his dismay). By the time I had wrapped up, we must have walked the pitch at least 3 times in its entirety, before retiring to the centre circle where we sat on opposite sides of the half way line staring at each other.

“I’m sorry that I ruined you for any other man,” Fede spoke solemnly.

“Fede, no - it was my stupid mistake to sleep with Jack.”

“No, let me finish amore. I’m sorry that I made you love me so deeply, and convinced you that the way I treated you was the right way, that the way I was with you was what you expect in every man to come after me. This Jack, he sounds just like me about 5 years ago - before I met you. But Ben, he sounds like the man I am trying to better myself to be, to be the man that deserves the kind of love you have to give.”

“I want you to listen to me. You need to fight for Ben. From what I have heard from both yourself and Jorgi-”

“That boy cannot keep his mouth shut to save himself,” I muttered under my breath.

“Amelia, you have a heart that deserves to be loved. Open yourself up to Ben. Tell him how you feel. From experience, you are very hard to ignore when you’re so vulnerable. Be honest with him, apologise, make him feel wanted, not like a second choice. Let him know how much you care for him, and equally how much you want him to care for you. He will see your sincerity and realise just how truly irresistible you are.”

Part 12. | la parte finale

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yesimwriting · 4 years ago

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playing vices

“A/n a blurb bc ive been working on my novel and ive missed writing for Kirigan :))

I am a fool that has played into her vices enough to make them addictions. That must have been Kirigan's plan. He knows that I don't agree with his methods. He is also much too aware of the fact that I am beyond attached to him. He plays into that fact often, lulling me to him whenever he feels that my conscious is in danger of driving a wedge between us.

Which is why I have become accustomed to falling asleep while running my fingers along his skin as he whispers things much sweeter than anything he would say while fully awake.

But now it's late and he's not here. I sit up, kicking the comforter off of me slightly. It seems Aleksander has been more and more absent these days. When he's not with me, the odds that he's doing something that hurts people are high. His absence is also starting to make me feel like he's losing interest in me. It would make sense considering the fact that he looked twice at me in any capacity has never seemed logical.

Maybe that's why we've never indicated commitment to each other. I don't know what commitment would be with him. He seems to grand to be considered a 'boyfriend', but there's something more than friendly about how he holds onto me. I've never cared for labels until I started feeling displaced.

"You're still awake."

I press my lips together, trying to seem a little calmer. "Couldn't sleep."

"Troubling thoughts?" The question is more weighted than it should be. Everything with him is.

“Has anyone ever called you dramatic?”

His lips quirk upwards, hinting at a smile. Warmth pools in my stomach, the way it always does when he lets me see the slight glimmer of light that’s still in him. Sometimes I think he only shows me this softness when he feels that I may pull away. It may be rooted in manipulative intent, but I know that it’s real.

“Only you would have the gall,” he says, voice low yet not dark.

Kirigan’s easiness coaxes a smile from my lips. A small one, but I can feel the way the crack in my tension feeds his confidence. He takes pride in slipping past the walls I only try to create when cautious or irritated. Today I’m both but I need to pretend like I’m neither. The more resistance he senses, the more forward and effective his advances become.

I keep my expression neutral. I’m sure Alina could get away with calling him that. I wish she was more unlikable. It would be easier to hide my irritation if I could blame that displaced feeling in my chest on two people. But of course Alina is wonderful, beautiful, and his equal.

Whatever. It’s not like we’re really anything. Every time I see him I wait for his betrayal. There’s nothing worth using me for, and somehow that makes me feel worse. He should have never looked at me twice let alone encourage whatever strange relationship we’ve created.

My silence seems to displease him because he approaches my bedside easily in quick yet patient strides. Now that he’s close enough to touch I feel some of the ice I managed to solidify melt.

Kirigan lifts a hand and places it on my knee easily. I stiffen instinctually, he runs his thumb over my skin to fight my resistance. “Who’s upset you?”

I breathe, forcing myself to ease. “No one has.” I don’t have to meet his gaze to know he doesn’t believe me. That’s the core source of our attachment, we can read each other with less than a look. “I’m just getting a headache,” not a full lie, “I’ll feel better after some sleep.” He squeezes my knee slightly, a soft way of asking me for more. “I don’t think I’ll be good company tonight.”

His hand leaves my knee, fingertips barely grazing my thigh as he moves his hand to hold beneath my chin. I still as he turns my head so that I have no choice but to meet his gaze. “You don’t need to be good company when what I want is your presence.”

I press my lips together to avoid melting into the promising pools of warmth that make up his irises. He spent all day with Alina, took Zoya’s side in an argument I had with her earlier this week, and now he comes to me late at night. He seems to only want to acknowledge me when we’re alone, and it’s not like I want more than that. I just don’t know how long my heart will be able to teeter the line between nothing and something. I’m a fool for having let it go on this long.

The only problem is that his steady stare is chasing away all of my rationality. “I’m sure you’ll be able to find someone more in the mood to offer their presence.”

My curtness leaves something behind his expression dull, the hint of a smile that was growing on him has now vanished. I am met with a stoic disposition I have never had directed at me.

“They’re not you,” he counters, voice edged by something I don’t understand.

That’s the point. They’re not me--I’m average. I can’t offer power and my relationship experience is basic at best. I don’t want to have this argument, not when I’m basically fighting for him to let me go when that’s not what I want.

I’m making it easier. If it hurts this much when I was only on the cusp of something, imagine the pain I’l feel if I let it continue. I turn my head away so that he’s no longer holding my chin. “Not a bad thing.”

“To me it is.” He doesn’t hesitate, my chest swells. His thumb brushes against my cheek, soft and comforting. “I’m tired,” he says this like it’s a confession. His admission hangs in the air for a long moment, as heavy and weighted as my heart. “If you’re angry, wait until morning.”

Something in my heart cracks. “I’m not angry.” My gaze drops, my thoughts struggling to come together. “I’ll be nicer to deal with in the morning.”

“Y/n,” his tone twists from distant to warning, “the last time you asked me to leave was when you discovered something you didn’t like.”

I almost wince at the way he’s worded it. When I found out what his real plans were, I told myself I had to leave. He skirted past all of my reservations and walls, twisting my doubt away through coddling whispers and shy brushes of fingers.

“This isn’t like that.” Not a lie.

He exhales slowly, the sound dangerously sharp. “Then what is it?”

“Why did you come here so late?” The question leaves me too sharply. I’m exposing too much but I can’t help it. “If you don’t want to answer, that’s fine.” My voice is flat. “I’m sure Alina will be happy to fill me in.” I can’t bring myself to take in his reaction. “And if she can’t, I’m sure Zoya will be able to.”

He’s silent for a long second. “Unwarranted jealousy doesn’t suit you.”

His confidence sparks something angry within me. “I am not jealous.” The most blatant lie of the night, but I don’t care. I turn my head to glare at him, “and don’t just tact on ‘unwarranted’ before something that’s true just because it’s easier for it not to be.”

I watch his expression cautiously until the slightest tilt of his lips adds to my anger. He’s enjoying this or he did this intentionally or both. “Darling,” he hums, voice soft, “you are the only person that makes me feel peace.”

My stomach flutters, the sensation threatening to break my weak resolve. “I am not particularly powerful,” I breathe, voice stiff, “or particularly...” How do I explain this all to him? “Anything.” He’s everything, and I am nothing but average. “I’m average at best, there’s no reason for you to want anything to do with me, and that’s fine--but don’t lie and pretend that that’s not true.”

The sentence is barely out fo my mouth before I feel myself pulled towards him by the collar of my nightgown. His lips are on mine before I can question where this is going. I kiss him back too quickly, but any effort I expend is returned fervently.

He pushes me back slightly as quickly as he yanked me forward. He doesn’t explain. I don’t ask him to. I should demand an answer and shove him away from me or pull him back towards me. But I do nothing. I just stare at him as he stares at me.

When the weight of the silence threatens to break something in me, I force myself to speak, “Kirigan--”

“Aleksander.” The name is soft and so fragile I worry it will shatter in the air before it can fully reach me. “You know there’s much I’m not ready to say, but that,” he exhales, the sound so sad I want to reach for him, “that is the one name I have not given to myself and I want you to have it.” Something conflicted crosses his features. “I would never give that to someone average.”

Emotion swells in my chest, heavy yet not painful. “Aleksander.” I’m not sure if I’m trying to call to him or if I’m just trying to feel his name--his true name--on my lips.

His eyes widen, something unbearable behind them. He moves the hand holding the collar of my nightgown to my cheek. I lean into the contact like a fool as his eyes flutter shut. “Say it again.”

I don’t hesitate, “Aleksander.” I lift my hand, fingers hesitant to find their place on his cheek. “Aleksander.”

He sighs into both the contact and the name. “You’re the first thing I’ve allowed myself to want,” his eyes open, but I cannot bring myself to meet his gaze, “I should make you feel like it.”

Something about the way he says that is sad. “I think that if it’s fair to say you were a little distant, it’s just as fair to say that I was a little jealous.”

Aleksander smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “I’m tired,” he admits, “I’ll enjoy my victory in the morning.”

I roll my eyes, but scoot over to give him a place by my side regardless. “I’m not sure you won, I think it was more of a draw.”

He takes the space I offer quickly, never letting the contact between us disappear as he settles himself against my pillow. I let him pull me towards him. “This feels like a victory.”

I try to ignore the warmth in my chest. “You’re lucky I’m tired enough to find that endearing.”

I relax as his fingers trace shapes I’ll never know about onto my back. “I agree.”

#shadow and bone #grisha #shadow and bone fic #shadow and bone fanfic #shadow and bone x reader #shadow and bone imagine #sab imagine #general kirigan x reader #general kirigan #general kirigan imagine #aleksander morozova #aleksander morozova imagine #aleksander morovoza #aleksander morozova x reader #aleksander morovoza x reader #the darkling #the darkling imagine #the darkling x reader #the darkling x you

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