#as a sibling that was my first thought watching his demo

[nacrelysis]

whenever i think about wanderer, i can't help but conclude that that the bird in his demo is nahida. like beyond the recurring motif of nahida being a bird - first in a cage, now free of her restraints - i think that's just something she would do.

i can definitely see her accompanying wanderer on his travels even though he's like "i don't need your help" because she wants him to enjoy his new experiences and make friends. while also maybe annoying him a little.

like, wanderer's first reaction to the bird persistently following him in his demo -> "oh, not you again" energy -> "fine you can join me just don't bother me"...peak edgy younger brother going out the door + protective but teasing older sister dynamic. and guess who has the driver's license of the two of them, lmao...two guesses and the first doesn't count.

(also i find it interesting that his demo is titled "of solitude past and present" but...with nahida by his side, and in this case literally, wanderer isn't alone anymore. and he doesn't have to be, doesn't have to face his fears on his own, ever again.)

[theamityelf]

I was thinking about your Mini's au while I was making som fanart if it and I was wondering how UDG/V3 would be able to work with the concept.

I'm totally sure with Udg with V3 minis (that just seems like...not great lol) However V3 with UDG characters seem a little more fun and can we could get more creative with it instead of having just either THH or GBD as their mini senpais (although it's kinda funny to think about there being a DOUBLE amount of senpais to take care of.)

Theres kind of a lot of ways we can go with this. We could just have the main characters (WOH, Komaru and Toko) and only them. Which could result in the pairing (or more) of the V3 characters to take care of 1 of the 7 minis. (I'd say Shuichi and Kaede take care of Komaru because it's adorable. Imagine Shuichi with 2 very energetic enthusiastic girls. He'd die + Naehara maybe who knows ooooooh~)

But we could also go the route of including other characters from the game such as Yuta, Taichi, Hiroko, Izuru perchance, and even Shiro and Kuro Kumas. Add in Byakuya for some spice That would bumb us up from 7 to 11 ( bears cause I'm not totally down for it. And izu could be done differently) It makes pairs easier to divide!!

For more fun we could include Hajime and Makoto from the demo!! It evens out the characters much well and they could accompany Kaede as they did in the demo but now we have a Protag squad (yaaaaay) Additionally it allows for some good sibling bonding for Makoto and Komaru!

I was imaging that for Trial 1 they disappear halfway and nobody would be able to find them afterwards (referencing the end of the demo because it just cuts off mid trial) which adds some drama for the V3 students that were assigned to them. In a similar light, Hajime and Izuru switch places mid trial and Makoto is still nowhere to be found. Allows us to include all UDG characters present and even more issues!!

For the pairings it would be hard to say but I'm working on a chart at the moment and if interested I'll totally share it in the next ask! (I work better with charts it's unfortunate 😞)

I dunno hehe, It's really a 4 am idea it might not be coherent lmao but I had fun writing this out. Thanks for letting me get my ideas out lol, I hope you enjoy reading this!

(Btdubs I'm still working on that mini rp server, I'll get back to you when it's up and running >:D)

(Awesome!!! So exciting!!)

(Mini Classmates AU Masterlist)

I really, really like the idea of the V3 cast having to pair up to care for Mini UDG cast. I would definitely love to see your chart, if you do make one. Right now, my thoughts are:

Komaru, Toko, the Warriors of Hope, and Yuta makes eight minis for the sixteen participants.

Kaede and Shuichi can share custody of Komaru, like you said. That works great, for the reasons you said.

Himiko and Tenko can maybe share custody of Yuta, because that would be challenging for both of them for different reasons, and I find that kinda funny. They would have to adjust in cute ways. Himiko is exhausted just watching him, but he fully buys into her magic stuff, and she becomes amenable to being more active.

Kokichi and Kiibo share custody of Monaca, but Kokichi is too un-trusting to actually share custody. (The rules are still that you die if the mini you're caring for dies.) This means that, if all else goes the same (which it of course probably wouldn't), then Kiibo wouldn't be around Monaca almost at all until Chapter 5, and then he loses his antenna. Monaca would understand the significance of the antenna so quickly. Honestly, she probably clocked it long before he even lost the antenna, and she mentioned it to Kokichi early on.

(I thought about having Kokichi paired up with Gonta, but I think not doing that shows off how special it is that Kokichi trusted Gonta with some of his plans.)

Kirumi and Maki share custody of Kotoko. It would be mostly Kirumi at first, but it would bring out a very cute side of Maki.

I'm torn between having Kaito and Angie share Masaru and having Korekiyo and Angie share Jataro. But I already have a fic for Kiyo, Angie, and Jataro, so actually maybe Rantaro and Angie could share custody of Jataro. They would be so supportive and patient.

Korekiyo and Gonta share custody of Toko. Because bugs and serial killers and the arts; it just feels like it would be a cool match in a lot of ways. Toko sits on top of Gonta's bug catcher. Also, Gonta casually picks up Toko's author vocabulary. Also also, I like the idea of these three spending time together.

Kaito and Miu share custody of Masaru? They would get so parental about it so quickly. Like, they would genuinely talk to each other like divorced parents. "Has he eaten?" "You're giving him a lot of screen time." Miu has a clear willingness to be maternal at the drop of a hat, and Kaito would match Masaru's high energy and need for attention really well.

Tsumugi and Ryoma share Nagisa? Ryoma having someone to care for would be a big deal for him, and the shared mental illness would be out of this world. Tsumugi might craft a tiny Nagisa Shiota cosplay.

Again, these are just the initial brainstorm matchups, lol.

But having the participants share a mini-person goes well with the rule where two people can survive together in this one (and also maybe parallels the Monokuma-and-Monokubs dynamic, but I digress). Plus it allows the potential for drama, because it seems like it would be a no-brainer that, if you were to survive with one person, it would be the person you share a mini with, but some characters feel differently.

Maybe Kirumi is the one who cares for any minis who lose both caretakers (if that ever happens).

And maybe part of Angie's new rules, once the student council stuff starts happening, is something about sharing the minis communally as a protective measure or even turning them over to her so they're all protected in one place, but then someone points out that doing this would mean that Angie could kill anyone without consequences by killing their mini. Angie wouldn't actually do that, but whether the unspoken threat of it is intentional or not remains unclear. She doesn't end up getting everyone's minis, but maybe she gathers a few together, from other student council members. Having a lot of minis in one place has the potential to prevent one's self from being murdered.

The downside to this is that I'm now realizing that the Mini Classmate AU's are arguably more fun without plot, lol. A part of me kind of just wants these characters to hang out in the situation rather than doing a Danganronpa. But also. It's fun either way. 🤣

[bylerschmyler]

Vecna's Power in the Upside Down

there is one thing that still confuses me when I watch the finale battle in S4.

I always asked myself why the hell Vecna doesn't use his telekinetic powers to throw the bottle back at Robin, Steve and Nancy snap there necks? Like boy your think of yourself as the psychic being and you can't even throw a bottle to where it came from?

And then I thought about how he only ever uses his powers (psychic powers, the hive mind is always active) when he is hooked up to the vines

And that he vanished from the mind lair the second the first molotov hit him and the vines retreated.

So maybe it's possible that he can't use his powers in the UD!

But then how did he form the Mind Flayer in the 79 UD?

He said that he could transcend his human form. So maybe in the process he had lost the ability to use his powers by himself without the direct connection to the UD.

Also something that's intresting:

If you compare the UD in S1,S2 and S4, S1 and S2 the vines appear to be dead mostly. They are barely moving in the UD itself and you can step on them and nothing happens. (The tunnels are different kind of topic and I don't count them as UD specifically). In S4 the Vines are a danger. Because if you step on them the Hive Mind is alerted and not only are Demo-beasts coming for you, the vines will try to pin you down too. Choke you to death.

So what if between S2 and S4 Vecna made a stronger connection to the UD by splitting up his powers but as negative effect he lost his ability to directly use his powers and needed to be hooked up.

Also can we please talk about how Henry is Darth Vaderish? Like you see the resemblance don't you?

Strong abilities

Joining the dark side

Needing prosthetics (Darth Vader mechanical and Vecna Flesh like)

Having a scariesh appearance

Slow walk

Heavy breathing

Distorted Voice

Having a signature weapon (red light saber, Claw hand)

Having a signature telekinetic move (choke, curse)

"you were my brother Anakin" vs El and Henry being siblings because they are numbers

[obscurecurse]

happy 20th anniversary Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge. that record is tightly linked with my earliest experiences with ghosts so i thought i would share a ghost story in honor

i remember my introduction to TCFSW well. when i was a tween my mom used to sit and watch music videos with me after school and the video for "helena" came on. i'd recently started dying my hair black/was on my way to being goth as it was. i was immediately drawn in. i remember the video ended and my mom said, "my chemical romance? that's a stupid fucking name for a band." jfoiwe;dj;weoidjwa we didn't have internet because we were remodeling the house. that weekend when i went to visit my dad i looked them up on his computer. i think i had the CD in my hands within a week.

our house was one of the oldest in the area. it had been a cottage, then later a boarding house of sorts. the neighborhoods were filled in around it. in the 1950s the ceilings had been lowered. part of the remodel was to demo the drop ceilings, to restore the rooms on the ground floor to their original height. in demoing the ceilings, we discovered artifacts that had been hidden under the floorboards of the upstairs rooms. my mom describes the way they started to fall out of the ceiling, and i wasn't there, but i can see it so clearly in my mind's eye. parts of an old stove, old cigarette boxes, handwritten letters from a woman who had been stranded in seattle when her husband left her there. some of it was donated to a local museum. my mom started to research the house and found that a lot of its occupants over the years had met tragedy.

there was also the residual energy from the years the house had been liminal, boarded.

unearthing these remnants of past lives opened something in that house. my mom and baby sibling were sleeping in my bedroom while the remodel continued. for half a year i slept on a futon in the side room on the top floor. i often woke up in the middle of the night, with this feeling i still struggle to put words to. i was so afraid of the way the dark clung to the corners of that room that i started sleeping with the lights on. through her research, and talking to elderly neighbors down the street, it was revealed this room i was staying in had been the bedroom of a teenage boy who had been killed in a horrific car accident. some of the cigarette boxes under the floorboards had been his.

the shadows moved in ways that didn't make sense. people who visited often fell down the stairs and said they were sure someone had pushed them. my mom often woke up in the night hearing sobbing coming from my room - but she'd open the door and find me fast asleep in a quiet room. the floorboards creaked under the weight of someone walking. the line of bamboo against the house, scratching the glass, would mix with whispered voices. my mom and i would wake up and tell each other details of the exact same nightmare. (we have shared dreams all our lives, but the nightmares in rapid succession were special.)

the other bedroom was finished and i started sleeping on a mattress on the floor in there, finally free of the incredible opacity of the darkness in that boy's bedroom. i was often the first one home. i remember walking through the sheets of plastic dust barriers in the dark downstairs, to get upstairs. i remember being afraid of the dark when the sun set early in the winter, being afraid of the quiet when i was alone. i'd put on three cheers for sweet revenge so that i wouldn't hear the ghosts in the other room. my CD player had a setting where it would automatically start the CD over when the last track ended. i would sleep with the music on all night, or the radio. (my mom didn't like me playing the radio because she would wake up and hear talking in my room and not be able to tell if it was a talkshow or the ghosts. the music, she knew)

i often tell people that my years in that house are why i am so sensitive to ghosts now. still. there were just so many of them that manifested in so many different ways. my mind, or my soul, whatever, was just tuned to the frequencies. i pick up on it easily now, everywhere i go.

friends will sometimes ask me to come get a feel for a place - a house they moved to, or a new office - to confirm for them if it's haunted. i still get that feeling that i would wake up with in that dead boy's bedroom. it's charged like fear. an overwhelming sense that i would not want to be alone in the space, especially if it was dark.

TCFSW got me through the period of my life where i had to sit with that feeling, alarm bells going off in my mind.

that record is also just heavy hitters from front to back. all killer no filler forreal.

-h

[royal1asset-if]

My Very First Interactive Novel.

Links: Character's Animal Pics,

Character's Badges, Character's Masquerade Mask

Teasers: 1,2,3

Spotify Playlist

Snippets: Dustin Wither, Amelia Payne, Luna Du Couteau, Serena Fairclough, Elric Graves, Conrad Hoyer

RO's Review Reaction: 1

Demo: Prologue up to Chapter 1

(Tip: On your mobile phone, go to your browser's setting and click on desktop site.)

Royal Asset is an interactive novel, about a group of people with exceptional skills that were tasked to defend the kingdom and it's crown. There are 6 love interest for you to choose from, 3 males and 3 females each with their own past and secrets for you to learn!

(Note: The RO's are not final. I might add more in the near future and that no romance is not a option. Also, I want this novel open as much as possible not restricting itself to the medieval time era or any kind of era. For example, I might put modern music in the novel.)

(Warning: 18+ Viewer discretion is advised! The story includes the following: Violence, Sexual themes, self-doubt, depression and many more will be added in the future.)

The game itself is currently in progress, where each chapter will be updated as I finish it.

The king is sitting on his throne, fidgeting anxiously.

Thinking how his life flashed before his very eyes, one assassin infiltrated his castle in the middle of the night and almost succeeded in taking his life.

" Haha! brooding my king?" his Royal Protector asked him.

"That obvious huh? Leon." the king said to his protector.

"Be quit, Leon! can't you leave the king in peace?" the king's Royal Wizard says annoyed, chastising Leon.

"You're always so grumpy! Leona!" he says to the wizard.

The king listening to the banter of the two, just can't help but to forget his present problem and laugh at their argument. Thinking how many years have passed, before they were children and playing around. These two are his most treasured friends and he can always rely on them to watch his back.

"Reminiscing my king? I can see tears forming on your eyes." Leon says.

"Yes, Leon I'm just thinking the good old days, now I have to manage this kingdom and ensuring safety to the people, not to mention almost getting killed in my sleep." the king says wistfully.

"Just remember you're not alone Hendrik!" Leona says gently, putting her hands on the shoulder of the king.

"I know, it's just taxing to oversee this all by myself!" he says frustated, hands clutching tightly

"That's what you get for being the heir." Leon deadpan. Before the king can something, Leon immediately cut him off.

"But worry not!, me and my sister here have thought of a plan to make your life easier!" he says triumphantly, fist raise in the air.

"Please do tell!" the king said tiringly.

"Hendrick, why not make a team that consist of people from different divisions." she says to the king confidently.

"We know the divisions have their differences and they are always at each other's throat, but this crazy plan might work!. he exclaimed skeptical.

"We just need to think of a group name, that will strike fear to the hearts of heathen and will be a beacon of light to the people.

"How about, "The Elites." she says.

"Too common Leona! we need something unique, "The Vindicators!" he says.

"Really Leon! "The Vindicators" the people upon hearing that, will think that they are mercenaries or thugs." she says exasperated.

The king closed his eyes and block out the noise of the arguing siblings and ponder what name will sound better.

"The Royal Assets!" he says aloud, it's name, reverberating through the castle walls.

The kingdom of Devontae, thrived and lived happily. King Hendrik rules his kingdom with a stern but caring hand. Ensuring the safety of it's people and punishing those who will disrupt the peace of his kingdom. With the council and advice of his "Royal Protector and Royal Wizard". His most trusted and treasured friends, ensuring that he will not fall from grace. But as time goes by, the king became weary as shouldering the weight of his kingdom alone is slowly taking a toll on him and one assassin almost succeeded in taking his life. His friends noticing this, decided to devise a plan that will help the king govern and protect his kingdom at the same time protecting the king himself.

They recruited the following people.

"Victoria Dare ,The Inquisitor. From the Knight Division"[F]

"Dante Bancroft, The Grandmaster. From the Assassin Division"[M]

"Ailwyn Elffire, The Sanguiner. From the Mage Divsion"[M]

"Kenred Ryder, The Hunter. From the Ranger Division"[M]

"Beatrice Delia, The Divine. From the Cleric Division"[F]

"Alessia Young, The Spectre. From the Rogue Division[F]

This warriors together, defended the people from injustice and dispose anyone who will do harm to the king. Operating both in the light and the shadows, they ushered the kingdom to peace and tranquility.

But as time goes by, our protectors grew in aged and wisdom. As well as their enemies becoming more powerful and cunning. Our protectors knows that time is against them and set out on recruiting new students. They started teaching, training and passing their knowledge to their new students.

As well as seeking the one who is worthy to bear their mantle and continue their legacy.

Will you be the one that will keep the peace in the kingdom or will you be it's liability and caused it's downfall?

MC's gender is locked to non-binary

*Customize your MC's physical appearance.

*Make choices that will affect the story and the people around you.

*Choose your class and mastery.

*Choose how the people will view you, will you be a merciful protector or a cruel warrior doing what any means necessary.

*Find love among the characters, know their story, see what makes them tick. 3 males and 3 females with their own personality.

*Will you follow your fate or make your own destiny.

*Each class has their own different story, so have fun exploring.

*Battle liches, dark knights, tackle conspiracy and many more!.

*Lead the team and be known as " The Peerless Dragon"!.

"Dustin Wither, The Roaring Lion. Knight Division" [M]

Role: Tank

Physical Appearance:

Weapons: Sword and shield.

"Guess, I'm built different."

A knight with a savior complex, they will always be the first one to the fray. Wanting to take most of the hits, so the team can hit back even harder. Their passion for protecting the innocents burns wildly, disregarding their own safety. Even it means dying they will not falter in their step, knowing that they will die honorably in battle and doing it for the greater good.

Ready to sacrifice themselves for the mission and for their friends. No matter what happens, they will always protect their friends even if it means losing a limp in the process, just to make sure their friends go home in one piece.

"Can your love endure the searing heat or will you be consumed by the raging flames?

"Elric Graves, The Watchful Eagle. Ranger Division"[M]

Role: Tracking

"What's life without risk?"

Physical Appearance:

Weapon Choice: Bow and short sword

Adventurous and care free is the word to describe them. Getting restless when staying for a place too long and doing nothing. To them life is supposed to be dangerous and exciting. A dancer and joker, they will always have a joke ready for every situation even in a life or death situation.

A daredevil and laughing at the face of death, they are always ready to accept any mission despite the risk. Always seeing the silver lining in everything even in seeing someone dying. To them seeing the team sad and glum is a horrible curse to bear.

"Will your love aim true or will it be broken in two"

"Conrad Hoyer, The Observant Owl. Mage Division." [M]

Role: Planner

"Why ever use your heart for thinking?"

Physical Appearance: Hair color blonde like gold, shaved short, reaching to their ears, Eye color calculating gray. Standing at 5'7 and skin color pale white. Lean body type.

Weapon Choice: Magic and staff

A pragmatic person and believing that the heart is the reason why people do things that they will regret later. Mind over matter, to them everything has a reason to why it came to pass. A perfectionist and straight-forward person. Not afraid to voiced out their thoughts and opinions on anyone. Not to mention drawing the ire of everyone.

They will ensure that the mission will go according to plan no matter what. Making sure that every data or analysis are 101% foolproof, even it means not sleeping or eating for many days.

"Can your love make them beat their heart one's more or will you be discarded like a failed experiment?"

"Luna Du Couteau, The Vicious Wolf. Assassin Division" [F]

Physical Appearance:

Role: Reconnaissance

"Emotions makes you hesitate and hesitation leads to death"

Physical Appearance: Hair color white as the moon, very short above their ears, eye color blue as ice. Skin color is fair like the light of the moon. Alethic body type. Standing at 5'8.

Weapon choice: Sword and dagger.

Their stare cold as ice and emotion locked deep within their heart. A virtuoso in the arts of assassination, may be in land, sky or water they will always hit their mark. As a lone wolf, they always distant themselves from others. Afraid that getting close to someone might open old wounds. Spent many years hardening their heart making it hard as steel and cutting out all emotions both heart and soul, making sure that it will not get in the way of completing their mission.

To them mission is first priority if it means sacrificing their friends. Using every resources at their disposal may it be life's or favors, they will not hesitate to do so, if it means securing the mission.

"Can your love thaw the wall of ice around their heart or will you freeze and cracked under pressure.

"Amelia Payne, The Zealous Bear. Cleric Division."[F]

Role: Healer

Physical Appearance: Hair color ginger like dying leaf, skin color is mocha like cinnamon, eye color is brown like their skin, Standing at 5'7 .Lean and athletic body type.

Weapon Choice: Hand to hand combat

"Even sadness can be a good thing, because it reminds that we are only humans.

The sunshine in the group, they are optimistic and supportive, but a very shy bunch. Believing that the world is not so simple as black and white. That there is more to cherish and explore in life. Don't mistake their kindness for weakness, for when provoked they will unleash their fury. Overprotective when it comes to their friends and showing their genuine concern to those who needs it, making them a motherly figure to everyone.

To them, the safety of their friends is what important ,than completing the mission, even it means if the king's life is at stake. Their very same friends who have been with them through thick and thin, making them family and a home to go back to.

"Can your love progress into something more or it will remained" stuck in first base?"

"Serena Fairclough, The Cunning Fox. Rogue Division." [F]

Role: Security Breaker

Physical appearance: Hair color is midnight black, skin color is warm ivory, eye color is swirling caramel. Standing at 5'6. Lean and small body type.

Weapon Choice: Escrima sticks and short sword

"They say never steal from a thief, but I think you got something that belongs to me."

A charmer and occasional poet, they always seemed to get what their heart desires. Gifted with a silver tongue, they can sway men and women both young and old. Not to mention has a knack for cracking open locks and safes. To them love is just a game, stealing hearts and after draining it's usefulness they will discard it afterwards. When the dust settles they, will ensure that they are the one left standing even it means fighting dirty to achieve what they want.

No mission will be safe from their hands and lock picks. No matter the difficulty they will always find ways to crack it. A improviser, they will always have a plan made on the spot just in case a mission gone awry.

"Can your love steal their heart or will they be the one that got away?

[alexisaflop]

On my mind - Steve Harrington x Reader

Been reading fanfiction, wanted to write something :) not what i normally do on this account but it's fun and I've missed it. anyway im a basic bitch who loves Steve Harrington so I guess that's what's coming first??

Set after the events of Season 2, after the reader saves Steve from a demo-dog. The reader is Dustin's sibling and chats with Steve whilst they wait for him to get ready.

Warnings: brief canon-typical violence, nightmares, literally just pure fluff

Henderson! reader, gnc! reader

2222 words

Had a lot of fun writing this, so let me know if you want anything else from this show :)

You watched as your little brother Dustin frustratedly styled his hair, rerunning the comb through and then inevitably changing his mind moments later.

"Stop watching me, Y/N, this is very delicate work," he exclaimed, closing the bathroom door behind him.

You receded into the living room, trying not to laugh at the antics of your brother. His crush on Max was cringy to watch, but it was classic middle school. Just as you had coaxed Mews 2 to sit with you, you hear a car outside, and shortly after the door goes.

"That'll be Steve, I'll delay him for you," you half-shout to Dustin, as you go to the door. He makes a disgruntled shout of gratitude in response.

"Hey," you say, opening the door.

Steve looked the same as ever, as if the recent events of demodogs and alternate dimensions never happened. He wore a simple red jumper that comfortably complemented his brown hair, that was - as always - impossibly perfect.

"Hey, Y/N. How's it going?"

"He's just getting ready, the suit looks good, but he's just, uh, perfecting the look. Do you want to come in and wait?"

He nodded, stepping inside, the wind from outside danced round him, his hair joining in sync, he was effortlessly handsome this way. Mews 2, seemingly instantly, appeared, purring and rubbing against Steve's ankles.

"Traitor," you commented, smiling slightly, "I spent ages getting her to like me, of course she loves you straight away."

"Oh, is that how it is?" Steve asked, leaning down, lifting the cat, who, much to your surprise, did not protest, "You would have thought that me saving your life and everything would have put us on the same team."

"You saved my life? Come on, Harrington, you know that's not how it happened. If it weren't for me, you would have been demo-dog food."

"Yeah, but that's only because I was only in that position to protect you anyway."

"Whatever, Harrington, I saved your life," you said half-jokingly, slowly approaching him.

It was silent for a while as you reached up and played with the cat, you couldn't believe how much nicer she was being to him. Up this close, you could smell a mixture of his hair product mixed with a seemingly natural scent of pine trees.

Unbeknownst to you, Steve was also watching you, the way your currently messy hair framed your face, and the slight vacancy of your eyes as you seemingly absent-mindedly petted the cat.

"So, how have you been doing, y'know, after everything?" Steve asked eventually.

You slowly looked up at him, calculating how serious an answer he wanted. His eyes looked into yours earnestly, almost intimidatingly so. Noticing you pause, he sat down on the sofa, just waiting for your response.

"I, I mean I'm alright, we all made it out alive - despite your multitudes of protest," you said, smirking at him, "but even though I know it's over, I keep wondering what if it isn't, y'know?"

He smiled sympathetically, it struck you again how pretty he was. "Hey," he said, you wondered vaguely how long it had just been silent, "El closed the gate, you know that, everything's okay now," his voice impossibly soft.

"I know," you nodded, "but sometimes, at night, I just see -"

"Alright, how do I look?" Dustin said, appearing from the bathroom. He paused slightly, noticing the intensity of the eye-contact between the two of you.

You smiled, "You look amazing Dusty, you know Mom promised me I'd get a picture."

Steve watched as you smiled and said this, noticing the easy switch to cheerful and supportive, all for the sake of Dustin. He tore his eyes off of you and turned to look at Dustin. His hair was teased into a curly copy of Steve's own.

"You look great, kid," he said, standing up with a grin.

He stood behind you, pulling faces to force Dustin to smile for a photo, before you insisted him being in one. After all, he was Dustin's chauffeur, and self-proclaimed best friend.

"Alright, have fun okay, and keep an eye on Will, yeah?" you said, dusting off Dustin's shoulder.

He nodded excitedly, already half out of the door, "See you tomorrow, Y/N!"

Steve followed, before turning back to you, "You sure you're gonna be okay?"

You just nodded, but something on your face must have been giving you away, because Steve tilted his head slightly, and those soft eyes of worry made a return.

"Yeah, Harrington, I'm all good, I'll see you around, alright?"

He looked like he was about to say something else. Right on cue, your brother called for Steve, insisting they were going to be late.

Steve muttered something about Dustin being a little shit, before half jogging down to his car.

You waved them off, before closing the door and sinking back into the sofa where he had sat moments before.

*****

In the car, Dustin asked, "Hey, what was all that with them?"

Not looking up from the road, Steve said, "what was all what?"

"With Y/N, you kept staring at them whenever you thought they weren't looking. I'm not blind, Steve."

"It was nothing, really, I just care about them that's all"

"So do I, so don't lie to me Steve, come on. I thought we talked about this type of stuff, now, since I love Max and all."

Steve could have sworn he sounded slightly genuinely put-out. He smiled slightly, "I just meant that ever since in the tunnels, when they saved me. They got hurt for me, and I feel kinda guilty about it, and then I couldn't get them out of my head. And they are beautiful, which doesn't make it any easier to forget."

"Hey, that's a blood relative of mine you're talking about there," he exclaimed.

"You did ask, and beautiful is hardly graphic, come on."

"You should tell them", Dustin said, "they'd prefer you were just straight with them. Plus, I hate having to watch you staring at each other, it's gross and distracting."

Each other? Steve thought, were they doing the same, and he hadn't even noticed?

"Fine, fine, maybe I will. But enough about that, here we are" Steve announced as he pulled into the school.

"So remember, once you get in there..."

"I don't care," finished Dustin.

Steve nodded, hyping him up, "That's right, you don't care."

Still unconvinced, Dustin checked his reflection, which Steve did not allow, as he closed the mirror he said, "hey, you look great."

"uh-huh," mumbled, Dustin doubtedly.

"You look great, you look great, okay?" Steve questioned insistently.

"Yeah".

"You're gonna go in there, look like a million bucks"

"YEAH"

"And you're gonna slam dunk"

"Like a lion," agreed Dustin, before making a weird noise with his teeth.

"Uh, yeah, don't do that."

Dustin nodded, defeated, and got out of the car.

"Go get 'em tiger!"

Steve smiled slightly, as he watched Dustin go, shaking his head, wondering how he became friends with some random kid. All because of Nancy - speaking of whom. He saw her through the window, talking to Jonathon. Steve leant back in his chair, and decided he was glad she was happy with someone else, as he pulled out of the car park, turning back towards the Henderson household.

****

You were still on the sofa, now curled into a ball as you read a book.

And then there was a knock at the door.

"Hey, Y/N, can I come in?"

You nodded, letting him in, he was holding a VHS and a plastic bag of snacks.

"I thought, if you can't sleep, I might as well get you to relax... if that's okay."

"Steve," you said, starting to say that he didn't need or have to.

But he shook his head, gently pushing you back into the sofa, he was warm, and even after he had removed his hands, you could feel a sparky outline of them.

"No Y/N, I owe you, you did, after all, save my life."

That got you to smile slightly.

Steve settled next to you on the sofa, a respectable distance, but close enough to reach out to him. You could almost hear his breathing, and you could smell him again. It was comforting, he was really here, unlike all the things you relived in the dark, and he was grounding. As the film ended, you realised how tired you actually were, and tried, but failed, to hide your yawning.

"So, when was the last time you slept, like properly?" asked Steve.

You just shrugged.

"Come on," he said, having switched off the TV, he pulled you gently out of the sofa and you both meandered to your room.

"What if you stayed?" you mumbled, you were almost embarrassed to ask him, but his presence was keeping you calm in a way you hadn't felt before, which wasn't something you were ready to lose.

"If you're sure, that's okay," was all he said.

You vaguely wondered if that was something he actually wanted, but you were too tired from your shift at work earlier, and then getting Dustin ready, that you didn't really want to start questioning that.

Steve went to the bathroom whilst you got ready for bed. As he washed his hands, he looked at himself in the mirror, pausing in slight disbelief that you were letting him stay around. The truth was, he loved your company too, like he had told Dustin, you hadn't left his mind since that night when you had fought that demo-dog away from him.

When he returned to your room, you were already curled up under the covers. So, he laid down opposite you, on top of the covers, but under a blanket. You were staring in front of you, your eyes vacant, as if looking at something that wasn't really there. But when he settled next to you, you smiled slightly in recognition.

"Hey," you said softly.

"Hey," Steve responded.

You really did look beautiful wrapped up like that. So, he reached out, brushing your hair from your face, when you didn't protest, he carried on. Slowly, he played with your hair, letting it run through his fingers. The entire time, he made sure to be gentle with you, just trying to distract you, as slowly, but surely you fell asleep.

For a while, Steve carried on, just looking at you, but slowly he fell asleep too.

****

Suddenly, you were back in the tunnels, you had reached the hub, and there was one stalking the group. It was staring you down. You were all alone and as it charged, you could do nothing. Your feet were stuck to the ground, it opened up its mouth about to -

You lashed out, swinging your arms in a last minute attempt to protect yourself, before realising it wasn't real.

Steve caught your badly formed fist in his hand.

"Hey, hey, hey," he said softly. He didn't wait for a response, just pulling you into him until your head was buried in his chest. He wrapped his arms around you, one hand resting on the back of your head, starting to play with your hair. The other hand slowly drew circles in your back.

You leant into him, letting him know he was okay to keep going, and eventually returning the hug, with one arm settling over his shoulders.

"You're okay, I promise, I'm right here," he said softly.

You nodded into his chest.

****

In the morning, you were both still entangled. He was watching you with an absent-minded smile on his face.

"Morning, beautiful," he said.

You hit him playfully, "oh shut up," you said, barely daring to believe this was real.

He was still looking at you. "I meant it."

"What?"

"I meant it. I think you're beautiful, I haven't stopped thinking about you since everything that happened. You're brave and kind, and maybe too good to your shithead brother."

You just stared in shock, you couldn't really believe it. Until you had seen him getting his ass handed to him by Billy Hargrove, had you really started to like him. But he had always been gorgeous himself.

You realised he was waiting for you to say something.

"Me too," you admitted, finally looking back up at him.

His hair was falling into his face, so you reached up to fix it for him. It was only then you realised just how close together the two of you really were. His eyes were on you, following your every move. As you fixed his hair, he leant into your hand. Neither of you could break eye contact, until his betrayed him, slipping down to look at your lips before flickering back up.

You smiled slightly, only drawing his attention back to them, as you leaned in, and gently pulled him most of the way.

It started off slowly, his lips unbelievably soft. And then he was pulling you close, one hand coming up to hold your head, the other sliding up your back. You wrapped one leg around him, each of you keeping the other close.

When your faces pulled apart, the rest of you stayed wrapped together. Safe.

You rested your forehead against his.

"Okay, Harrington, we're even now."

He laughed gently, before kissing you again.

[apompkwrites]

I just read your story, the one with Xiao and Albedo, its really good! I love it! Is it ok if you do the same thing but with Kaeya, Zhongli, Childe and Diluc version. I can see how excited these guys are since Kaeya first appeared is clapping his hand, the way Childe call Lumine 'Hey Girlie', Zhongli with how handsome he is especially his eyes and with Diluc how mysterious he is when he appeared out of nowhere

Feel free to do it if you're not busy or you can ignore this :3

reader impact || first meeting cont.

series masterlist characters: kaeya, diluc, childe genre: fluff summary: a game has been released entitled genshin impact, consisting of otherworldly abilities relying on the basic elements of nature. the game follows the story of an interdimensional traveling twin in search of their other half. along this journey, they meet different characters that live in this world. including you. notes: i’m glad you liked it! i’m having a lot of fun writing these so expect some more coming out :D i plan on doing more first meeting hcs and then branching off to other scenarios, so if there’s something specific, please request it! also, i’ve already done one for zhongli!

kaeya's playthrough -

he's more of a variety streamer, honestly.

most of his viewers watch him because of his carefree nature (as well as his looks).

obviously, he'd do a bunch of drinking streams whenever he could where he would just talk to his viewers about whatever came to mind.

during those streams, his viewers often try to ask him questions, which are only answered in vague statements.

his gaming streams are pretty rare compared to his chatting streams, but they're there nonetheless.

his viewers jump when they hear he's planning on playing genshin impact.

just neverending messages about a character they are convinced he will love.

he's so tempted to ask but decides not to, wanting to learn who this mystery character is on his own.

honestly, he was expecting you to appear way later in the story.

he's very interested in the looming threat of stormterror.

his character lands on the ground and he leans back to watch the cutscene play.

then he hears footsteps and sees his character look to someone offscreen.

this man practically LUNGES INTO HIS MONITOR WHEN THE CAMERA PANS UP TO YOU.

you walk in clapping at a calculated pace, which is when he leans forward and stares at your character model.

"i can't believe you have the power to stand up against that dragon... that said, are you a new ally... or a new storm?"

"oh, hun, i can be whatever you want me to be."

HE'S ALREADY FLIRTING WITH YOU PLEASE HIS CHAT IS IN HYSTERICS-

he knows his chat is freaking out, so he turns to the camera and sends his signature smirk.

"now i know why you guys wanted me to play this so bad."

"(name), kaeya, you've come at the right time. we must..."

"now now, don't forget to introduce us."

"oh... right. this is (name), our cavalry captain. these two are travelers from afar."

"ooh, they're a person in charge, too?"

HE KNOWS WHAT HE'S DOING TO HIS CHAT BUT THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU DO TO HIM.

he genuinely likes you. like genuinely. he's fallen deep and he doesn't plan on leaving anytime soon.

if your costume has that long v-neck like his does...

hOO BOY HE'S THANKING EVERY DEVELOPER OF THIS GAME.

anyway, he's heard that there are characters you can only obtain throguh wishes, so he's kind of nervous to find out if that's the case with you.

he just really wants you in his party so y'all can be mysterious together.

"let me show you how the knights of favonius conquer our adversaries!"

"oh, yes. please do."

his viewers can and will make compilations of him flirting with you.

ngl, he's looking forward to those.

sometimes, your voice gets all quiet and he melts when he hears that.

he will pay to have voicelines of you flirting with him--

when he enters your trial domain, he will purposely avoid completing it just in case he doesn't get to keep you.

he sees some of his viewers talking about how you're a bad character and that the other characters are so much better.

too bad, they're banned now.

no (name) slander in his chat, thank you very much.

he loves your quips whenever he uses your elemental skill.

he loves you even more if those quips are puns based on your element.

finally, he's nearing the end of your domain. when that happens, he will slowly turn towards the camera and stare.

"if they aren't a permanent member on my team, this'll be the last stream of genshin."

"let's continue our adventure, shall we?"

obtained (name): a thinker in the knights of favonius with a somewhat exotic appearance.

"okay, so we'll continue streaming genshin soon."

he'll put you in the first slot of his party, moving his traveler character to the second.

his streams will always include him flirting with you, even if you don't reply.

diluc's playthrough -

his streams are mainly bartending based, so he likes mixing drinks on stream for his viewers.

he doesn't drink them, though. he gives them out to his friends and family once the stream is over.

it's pretty rare for him to play games but he'll do an occasional gaming stream if his friends and family don't want any drinks.

his chat always makes fun of him because he's a bartender that doesn't like the taste of alcohol.

he's very blunt, so he's not afraid to drop a game immediately if he isn't interested.

in fact, that's almost what he did with genshin.

it's not like the game is bad or anything, diluc just didn't care for it because of all the hype his chat shared.

he keeps playing, though, because someone promised he would really enjoy a character that comes up in the prologue.

granted, it's over an hour or so but it doesn't matter--

when he gets to the domain teaching him how to use cryo, he hates every minute of it.

he hates the character he's given and just wants to leave.

the demo character is one he doesn't really care for, especially because he's the type of person he dislikes coming to the bars he works at.

his chat is laughing at him when they reach the end because the cutscene continues with the character he hates.

he feels a bit better when he learns the abyss mage is in the domain because he gets to see and hear something that isn't the cryo character.

then he meets you.

you run into the domain out of nowhere, quickly defeating the abyss mage and tossing it towards the corner.

"knights of favonius... always so inefficient."

his chat goes insane when your character appears, especially because of how dumbfounded diluc looks.

he's known for not really emoting and it's the same case for this scene. however, his chat knows he is in love with your character.

he takes a few minutes when he's kicked out of the domain but he clears his throat and looks over at the camera.

"i'll be streaming this game again soon when the others don't want any drinks."

YOU SINGLEHANDEDLY SAVED THIS GAME FROM BEING TOSSED AWAY WITHIN A MINUTE OF APPEARING

THE POWER YOU HOLD OVER THIS MAN AND HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW YOUR NAME--

cut to after he's stolen the lyre and is sent to the tavern.

he's a bit excited because he gets to visit mondstadt's tavern but then--

"master (name), this is this week's accounts."

"they're back."

HE'S SO NONCHALANT BUT WE ALL KNOW HE'S FREAKING OUT

he gets second-hand embarrassment when venti talks to you asking for the... least conspicuous table.

he's kinda sad when your character is suspicious of him, but he understands.

when the knights leave the tavern, he really wants venti to just shut up.

please you're embarrassing the man.

when he hears how you feel about him joining the knights, he is so willing to quit--

man just wants you to be proud of him and trust him :((

he's relieved to hear that you will help him and you don't hate him.

please give him validation--

childe's playthrough -

man is still rich he can do whatever he wants.

his gaming streams would definitely be pvp based games. honestly, just any game where he can fight someone, he'll play.

his chat also has a few little games they like to play together like guessing what the hell this man does to have so much money--

also his siblings crash in on his streams sometimes :D

those are pretty much the only times you'll see him be soft and not so competitive.

teucer likes crashing his streams to show off his plushies :))

anyway, genshin time!

he definitely tried to fight paimon the first time he loaded the game.

please expect lots of genshin stream from this guy because he needs to make his team deal the highest damage he can get.

also his wallet doesn't even have a dent in it despite all of the money he's spent on characters and weapons.

please sir what do you do for all that money

ok so onto your first meeting

he was really excited when the exuvia fell during the rite of descension because he thought he would get to fight whoever killed the great archon of liyue.

he really wanted to fight the millelith but then his chat convinced him to dodge them first.

one of his viewers explains that there's a character they know he'll like and he was very... intriguied to say the least.

he moves forward in his chair once his character is heard by the millelith, prepared to fight the various soldiers surrounding him.

"hang on, sweetheart. i've got this."

this man will squeal when you flip over the stairs in front of his character.

he doesn't know who you are and what you do but he knows for a fact that you are his new favorite character.

you take down all of the guards in two seconds, leaving him (and his in-game character) dumbfounded.

"come with me."

"o-okay..."

he's smitten.

he absolutely loves the way your character fights even if he met you about... a minute ago.

his siblings definitely come into his room to check on him because he's so quiet.

once he realizes you're a part of the harbingers, he's even more obsessed.

he hates the options the game gives him when he needs to respond because 2/3 of them are insulting you.

anyway he really likes listening to your voice.

he will give anything to hear you call him sweetheart again.

his chat informs him that the traveler he chose changed the nickname you give him, which makes him very happy.

when you send him off to talk to the other adepti, he's kind of disappointed he doesn't get to hang out with you.

but when he gets back to you...

"welcome back, sweetheart. how was your trip to jueyun karst?"

HE'S SOFT ALL OVER AGAIN PLEASE KEEP CALLING HIM SWEETHEART!!!

when he learns you're rich just like him... he gets all pouty. his chat, of course, wants to know why.

"... i want to be able to spoil her."

PLEASE HE'S SO IN LOVE WITH YOU <3

[kaypeace21]

Crash-course for all the evidence of Will creating the mindflayer/upsidedown

* Honestly I’ve talked about this stuff in my did theories- where I explained how the upsidedown/mf/ the lab subjects/ and russians all connect back to Will creating them. But since so may people assume that Will got his powers from the upsidedown/mf rather than Will creating it all subconsciously (with his powers). Thought i’d do a short analysis of just that connection (without boggling it down with those other plot lines that are interconnected) . *So I’m not mentioning the lights -because it interconnects with the numbers/lab.I’m just going to list every example in short succession from every season for brevity’s sake (so it won’t be structured as eloquently as prior analyses). 

refresher of how Will influences the mf/upsidedown ...

S1) 

Will ( in s1e1) says to Dustin if he could have any comic it would be the xmen. Dustin later  says "do you think - el was born with her powers like the xmen? " Will plays a d&d game saying the demogorgan got him -so it does irl. Will writes stories where bad guys weakness are fire so the mf/ demogorgans are lit on fire in s1-3 (and it's their weakness). Will watches poltergeist so Will is forced to be the child character in that film- who was trapped in a alternative dimension and could only speak to their mother through tech. The demogrgan is said to resemble a shark by nancy-mathcing Will’s Jaws movie poster in his room. in s1 Mr clarke describes the vale of shadows (later the upsidedown) as being created by “necrotic” (’dead’-zombie boy) and “shadow” (shadow monster/mf) “magic”. In d&d the Vale of Shadows, is  as a lush valley hidden in the mountains that holds a sacred pool with the power to make dreams reality. In d&d the demogorgan is literally called the "deep father" in d&d Nancy also says the demogorgan is like a “lion” the meaning of the name Lonnie- is literally “lion”. We see it attack Will when using lonnie's gun (in lonnie's shed). And it knocks the bat out of Jonathan's hand too. (Baseball/hunting were taught by their dad lonnie). The demogorgan also hurts a deer- mirroring Jonathan's story about how Lonnie forced him to kill a rabbit and how this upset him as he was a fan of the rabbit character from the film bambi.. El when she first sees the demogorgan also sees it eating it’s own eggs-aka symbolically the father hurting his own children.  Will's password for cb is rhadagast a wizard who protects Wildlife (the opposite of Hunter-lonnie/the demogorgan). 

Duffers cited as inspo the silent hill videogames): And in s1 Hopper named dropped the character Alessa’s last name. “The bad guys faked Alessa’s death. Kaufmann prepared a substitute body of alessa;  and performed the fake autopsy (like Will) . Alessa had precognition (future/intuition-like will the wise is said to have in s3) and pyrokinesis (firepowers mentioned  Will the wise has in s1).  Alessa’s latent psychic abilities are triggered and she shrouds Silent Hill in fog and an altered reality to prevent her ab*sive parent’s schemes from advancing. Many of the drastic changes that befall the town in the game, such as the horrific creatures that come to inhabit it, are conjured from her imagination and delusions. “ 

Will also says in s1ep1 he wants xmen 134-about the dark phoenix saga. ‘dark phoenix’  - has pyrokinesis ( fire powers-like Will the wise). And the dark phoenix also  “was able to warp reality on a universal scale”. One of the phoenix’s host was even the god Thor (god of lightning-an element Will is associated with a lot in s2)

(in s1 Will also spit up a slug- in d&d putting a slug in a humanoid can create/turn that humanoid into a mf. foreshadowing Will being posessed/becoming the mf in s2. ).

S2)

 Will plays digdug (a videogame about underground tunnels) so the mf creates tunnels. Will's dog dies so demogogans become demo-dogs. He also watches Ghostbusters- where a character is possessed by the ‘gate keeper’ and can control demon dogs. So this happens to Will too -similar to s1 with poltergeist .In s1 , Hopper even mentions the book Cujo about a violent dog, who is replaced by a new dog named ‘Willie’ (to allude to this).In s1 we see  Mike holding a drawing of Will’s- where Will's wizard has lightning powers (coming from his hand). everytime Will uses tech in s1, the phones explode and lighting appears out of them- hopper makes a BBQ joke about the burned phones.later in s2 the mf has these same lightning abilities and the lab technician makes the same BBQ joke.Joyce even describes the tunnels of the mf/ that Will’s draws as “like lightning.”  We also see the russians eviserated by lightning next season too.

A lab tech calls Will a wizard-and they monitor his brain waves, record him on video, just like they did to El .(when the mf first appears at Will’s house- the lab techs even notice ). The drawing of the mf is next to a baseball (Lonnie ref) and Will says it was a drawing for a story he wrote. In s2 Nancy describes the mindflayer (but she’s actually describing Will).“So this thing is like a brain that’s controlling everything.”Because it’s not the mindflayers’ brain - it’s Will’s brain controlling everything. ( a “hive mind” aka the mf/WILL share a brain ). Owens in s2e1 (BEFORE the mf possession) says Will's ‘anniversary affect’ would make him remember “tra*matic memories” and “OPEN the neurological flood GATES” (aka Will’s neurological GATES are the gates between the real world and upsidedown - which are connected to the mf).  

 Owens in s2e1 (after mentioning the “gates”) even says Will's ‘anniversary affect’ /  “tr*umatic memories” would  cause temporary “personality changes”for Will (the later mf possession) . I mean... Owens wasn’t entirely wrong was he? Will even feels the back of his neck in s2 and says it has to do with “memories” ...and in s3 feeling the back of his neck meant Will was sensing  the mf. Similarly, before his possession-mr clarke  mentions phineus gage who after an accident had a “complete change to his personality” (and the shot pans to Will).

Nancy even calls the mind flayer the “mind-flamer”- hinting at it’s connection to Will the wise who has fire powers). And Dustin says the mf “takes over minds with it’s highly developed psyionic abilities “ And to “summon an undead army... cause the mindflayer loves brains ” ( and in s3 the mf creates a undead army by taking over people’s brains). Hopper  even says “So how do we kill this thing shoot it with fireballs ?” (which destroys the flesh-monster in s3) ”

S3) 

Will (the “zombie boy”) writes a story about juju zombies after watching a film about zombies at starcourt in s3 - then the mf creates a undead army -which was also foreshadowed in s2 (and similar to Will’s  s3 d&d story).  We also see Will wrote this d&d story in front of "the thing" poster. So the mf creates a flesh monster resembling the creature in that film too.  We also see someone get bit (el) like in Will's story and when his friends retcon his ending to be about “sacrificing themselves via explosion (Hopper).” Will just says “fine you win” (so it ends that way).Also, the shadow monster is now called the Mindflayer - and mimics the mf from d&d (both can control rats with their powers in the show/game).  

Will in s2-3 grabs the back of his neck and he attributed it to “memories”, “dreams”, and sensing the mf. Will created castle byers after his dad left and he grabs the bat in cb which was next to the Will the wise drawing (similar to how the baseball was next to the mf drawing in s2) and destroys cb with said bat . Then Will touches his neck and admits the mf has returned.  EVERY moment Will senses the mf can be loosely connected to Lonnie. Lonnie used to call him h*mophobic sl*rs so anytime he subconsciously thinks of his feelings towards Mike the mf appears-1st time it’s on one of their ‘movie dates’, 2nd time when Mike and El walk off together down the hill to make-out, 3rd time right after he smashed castle byers after Mike says “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls”, 4th time (after the fight with Mike) when Billy is yelling to open the door (a trigger) and confides in Mike, 5th time when Mike asks him to go away so he can talk to El in the hospital waiting area, and 6th time when Mike says he loves El. The 7th time is when Jonathan is fixing up a car -something Lonnie used to do.Lonnie fixes up cars as a hobby-showing his remodeled car to Jonathan in s1 . Will then senses the mf and grabs his neck-which he said are connected to old “memories”.  max and Mike are silent until Jonathan says  says “got it (the distributor)”. Then Mike screams for his older sibling. We also see in s1 Jonathan checked to see if Lonnie threw Will in his trunk- something the mf does to some of his victims in s3.

Dustin and susie sing “never ending story”- which is literally about a seemingly normal boy  named Sebastian with a bowl cut (from a single parent home) subconsciously making a fantasy world being invaded by a dark force (representing the loss of hope/dreams) that only his imagination powers can fix . “make believe i’m everywhere ... what you dream will be...Rhymes that keep their secrets Will unfold behind the clouds.And there upon a rainbow Is the answer to a never ending story” . Cough-Will’s rainbow ship he CREATED.Both times the  lyric plays  “Rhymes that keep their secrets WILL “ ( it pans to Will). 

The film also follows a false chosen one who everyone says is supposed to save fantasia- named Atreyu (el). Specifically, for that plotwist that Sebastian (Will) has to be the one to do so , not Atreyu (who sebastian subconsciously created). In the novel/film-Atreyu ( the child who was deemed the ‘chosen one) is knocked from Falkor’s back, and into the sea of possibilities. There he wakes on the shore of abandoned ruins. 

“There Gmork (The Mindflayer) reveals himself, having been lying in wait.And then latches his jaws onto Atreyu’s leg.”

-Before the duet, Susie tells dusin she’s reading “ a wizard of earthsea” and says ged is about to save his world. The book is about a boy-wizard  named Ged (Will) who casts a powerful spell, but the spell goes awry and instead he releases a shadow creature! The new Archmage, Gensher, describes the shadow as an ancient evil that wishes to possess Ged. But the ‘shadow’ turns out  to be a representation of the darkest aspects of his personality. And the only way for the world to be saved is for the 2 to merge and for Ged to accept himself . 

-Will says he’s a wizard ( writing on a music tape in s3 “will the wise-wizard mix’ and having his password for castle byers be ‘rhadaghast’- a lotr wizard). The way they describe d&d Wizards matches Will/mindflayer perfectly “Wizards are adepts and magicians who combine according to the type of their spells. Relying on the subtle weaves of magic that permeate the universe, wizards are able to create spells of explosive fire, sparking lightning, subtle deception, and gross mind control. Their magic summons monsters from other planes of existence, predicts the future, and turns defeated enemies into zombies. Their most powerful spells can transform one substance into another, summon meteors from the sky, and open portals to other worlds” (all these powers Will the wise/mf are implied to have)

- Stranger things d&d comic (published post s3) : Will creating a illusion army of monsters -as Will the wizard.

- stranger writers twitter reffed several movies which discuss artist/writer WILLiam Blake who helped make the art exhibit “worlds turned upsidedown” 

possible reason for the flayed eating  chemicals& fertilizer (in s3)

full link/credits here.  Lonnie’s gf has a biker shirt from Harley davidson- with the eagle logo and their saying “live to ride’. Which would imply lonnie is also in such biker circles. Harley davidson in the 80s had dr*g gangs too (primarily m*th).

 One reason m*th is so prevalent in rural areas is that it can be formulated, or “cooked,” by small producers and one of the ingredients is readily found on most farms – anhydrous AMMONIA fertilizer. Both farmers and chemical suppliers have experienced thefts of anhydrous particularly in the Midwest.“

WHICH REMINDS ME OF the FLAYED EATING FERTILIZER AND CHEMICALS IN S3 . Nancy even says farmers/chem suppliers  are having fertilizer stolen! And she later thinks flayed tom was on drugs- “A mysterious  case of the missing fertilizer- a Nancy Drew Mystery”. This is also in the same season one character (who looks a bit like Lonnie) is a biker is corrupting the town.

Will creating /basing the supernatural from suppressed memories -means it’s from a very young child’s perspective . young Will would equate people eating chemicals, ammonia fertilizer, and ammonia... to using those SAME chemicals to create m*th and then physically consuming them . Why we see mrs driscoll eating fertilizer & Billy drinking ammonia.

The reason the flayed started behaving differently is probably because in s2 Will was forcibly injected with a needle & woken up with ammonia by Hopper-jogging some of those old memories. 

EVEN Nancy’s proof Tom is on dr*gs is a symptom of m*th use or withdrawl from it-excessive sweating (like all the flayed in s2-3). M*th causes hyperthermia (body is at a higher temp than usual)-so they like it cold!!!!! Even clammy hands that she mentioned is a symptom of m*th use. in children it can even cause seizures- like Will :(

And when m*th is made via fertilizer it first is made into a highly corrosive liquid which is sometimes green-like the Russian lab.“six pounds of toxic waste is created for every pound of m*th manufactured. The waste is often dumped on farms, in rivers and and is harmful to the environment.” Like all the chemical leaks relating to Hawkins lab/mf that affected the crops in s2/this pic of water in s3.

m*th was even called ‘bathroom crank’-which is sketchy given the bathtub is what mf fears and how the sensory deprivation tank is also called a ‘tub’ by el . Becky even said Brenner would get terry high and throw her in the tank/tub.

It also does take some chemisty knowledge to COVERT various substances (including fertilizer and other chemicals) to make m*th- which reminds me of the kids saying they can convert one substance into another (when explaining why the possessed are eating chemicals)- they say they’re making a new chemical “in themselves”

other hints

Will’s b day is march 22 . Which is when “fire burns most brightly” and his ‘birthday number is number 7′ (”it was a 7 the demogorgan it got me′) . The number 7  is specifically associated with  “wisdom and psychic abilities”.  His b day even adds up to 7 (3+2+2).His horoscope is also influenced by the shadow god-ketu (who is also associated with wisdom and psychic abilities too). 

* There’s way more details/depth/ other st inspirations in my DID analyses -specifically pt 2. (where i discuss how the mf/upsidedown connects to the numbers/russians- and also specifially Will).But this is just a crash course about the flayed/upsideown/it’s creatures connect to Will.

People will dismiss all of this as just the Duffers liking to reference random things they like/ and foreshadow via d&d without any in universe reason.  but I really think that’s a disappointing explanation/outcome. Especially the predictable cliche theory that the mf is just experiment #1. Not only is it boring, cliche, and predictable af- but it doesn’t line up as well with the mental health themes mentioned in ever season.Will created everything via tr*uma cause of his dad- and overcomes this: is not only a “twist” that will make rewatching more enjoyable given all the hints- it’s more narratively sound given how much the series touches on themes such as overcoming tra*ma, mental health, and problematic fathers. The #1/ex experiment=mf theory doesn’t explain why they made the supernatural connect to Will in this way . And with such a boring cliche ending it would quickly be forgotten like other big sci-fi/fantasy shows that quickly lost relevancy after being popular: like heros, g.o.t, etc.One makes the show cliche another makes it remembered for decades (ex: jacob’s ladder).

[brattyfics]

— until we meet again, preciosa

PAIRING || bishop losa x black!ofc, miguel galindo x black!ofc (mentioned)

SUMMARY || She’s not his, and she won’t ever be, so he leaves her with words whispered like a promise. “Until we meet again, preciosa.”

TAGS || angst, unresolved feelings, not a hea, mentions of toxic relationships, sex (referenced).

WORD COUNT || 1.6k

Shadowy clouds hang overhead, blocking out the warming glow of the Sun. Raindrops pelt the roof above, drumming a beat of their own before pooling down to the concrete paved streets below. Isis watches stray droplets gather on the tall windows for several moments before stepping out onto the covered balcony. It felt colder than usual inside the three-story, Spanish-style shophouse, but outside it’s the opposite-- balmy, earthy. The air is heavy with humidity, so she has to take deep breaths, but she doesn’t enjoy it any less. Invigoration comes with the rain, brings hope for new beginnings, renews faith for the hopeless.

Down below, people dart between vendors to continue their shopping as the rain lightens. Colorful rays spring from puddles up towards the sky. A pair of young siblings splash each other while their mother sells delicious smelling tamales wrapped in banana leaves. Another young woman peddles gold necklaces, praying candles, and other little knick-knacks to the tourists of Sonora. Everybody has to make a living, including Isis.

She spends her days stroking the strings of a guitar or the keys of her piano, helping patrons of the music shop in between. The ground floor of the shophouse boasts string instruments and an extensive collection of vinyl records. After hours, she makes money hosting private piano lessons. She performs at the Discoteca down the street on weekends, fueling her passion for music almost 24/7 except when Preciosa is closed for ‘maintenance’.

Overstock merchandise and whatever else the Mayans’ Motorcycle Clubs needs to store clutters the second floor. Don’t ask, don’t tell is her motto, so whenever they come to the shop, she simply flips the sign to closed. There’s no point in fighting it. Besides, El Presidente always makes it a bearable, if not pleasant, experience. Bishop had called ahead to warn her that he was bringing Hank, Angel, and the new prospect, Angel’s baby brother, along. She could hear them bumping around, a noisy reminder that her shop only thrived because of the illegal deals happening in the back.

“Why don’t you put all that time and energy into something that’ll get you somewhere?” Being a musician wasn’t an acceptable career in her mother’s eyes, so the woman took every chance she could to crush her daughter’s dreams. “Nobody wants to hear all that noise!” Staring out into the street, she can’t help but wonder where she would’ve ended up if her mother had been supportive. Maybe she could have been a star rising to the top of Billboard charts or someone who worked behind the scenes, writing songs, singing demos. She had the skill set. Yes, her path would have been much different.

Isis had stood front and center, crooning out an old school blues song at a hole-in-the-wall spot when Miguel Galindo first laid eyes on her. It was a chance meeting, one that felt like fate at the time because dive bars weren’t his scene. The owner was a business associate who decided to try his hand at being a restaurateur; Miguel had been kind enough to come out and support. When he caught sight of her shapely frame in a slinky, satin number, he insisted on being introduced.

Miguel stood out in a crowd, wearing a tailored button-down, dark dress pants, and an expensive pair of Italian leather shoes. His salt and pepper beard groomed to perfection, hair gelled so that no strand was out of place. The moment she’d looked into his eyes, she was caught in his web. His masculine scent drew her in like honey to a bee. His charisma held her attention. Miguel sweet-talked her all night, insisting Isis sit next to him, eat h’orderves, and drink overpriced champagne. She obliged. Who could say no to that face? He used their close proximity to reel her in like a fish on a hook, leaning down to whisper in her ear. You’re beautiful. He told her. You have such a smooth, seductive tone. You should be performing for bigger crowds. Have you ever thought about branching out? He told her everything her mother never had, so she was a lamb to the slaughter.

For months, Miguel had treated her like his very own LifeSize doll to play with. He took her on shopping sprees, kept her draped in silk and lace. Isis didn’t think of herself as materialistic, but she couldn’t deny being showered in gifts felt splendid. He was always so tender, handling her delicately as his newest prized possession. As time went on, she became more like an ornament. Something for him to marvel at when he felt like it and then hide away the rest of the time. But nothing was worse than him leaving her to harden after he was finished molding her like clay. She asked for more—time, commitment, only for him to do the opposite.

Thus, Preciosa was born. A way for him to placate her and later make it easier for the M.C. to make him money.

“Just a few more minutes, and we’ll be out your way.” Isis jumped at the sound, turning away from the street to see Bishop. She hadn’t heard him come outside; didn’t expect him to venture up into her personal space.

Isis’ smile rarely reached her eyes, Bishop noticed. He stepped forward, holding a velvet box that felt heavier than it was. Her fingertips tickled him as he passed it over. Diamonds surrounded in white gold gleamed as the clouds cleared away for the Sun. Even Bishop could admit the set was gorgeous, but she didn’t look impressed. He hated being Galindo’s delivery boy, watching the way her face fell when the gifts she received became increasingly impersonal with each week. Not long ago, he’d also been tasked with passing along handwritten love notes or antique music sheets that she caressed like she would a lover’s skin.

“Thank you.”

She couldn’t hide her disappointment from him. Not for lack of trying-- Miguel always reminded her, appearances were everything. Smile. Don’t make me look bad. But Bishop watched her closely, knew her tells. Despite every nerve in his brain urging him to walk away, he steps forward to stand next to her. His calloused hands rest on the balcony’s edge next to her delicate pair, brown in varying tones of sepia and mahogany contrasting against the white paint.

Bishop feels the heat of her eyes on his frame, but he doesn’t let himself respond. Sharing this moment, a quick breath of fresh air will have to be enough. But she’s all around him, smelling of florals and sweet spices. He can’t think. He fumbles with his pockets in search of a cigarette. “You mind?” She shakes her head but is otherwise silent. Still watching him as he smokes; the way he takes long, steady pulls, cradling the stick between his full lips and then between his strong, veined fingers. She would bet her last dollar that he was an expert at other things involving his fingers and mouth.

When his hand drops again, she links her pinky with his, hesitant but exploratory.

Bishop looks at her, really looks at her like he sees her. It’s nice to be seen, especially when you’re the princess locked up far, far away from everyone you’ve ever known. She’s a black girl from Texas living in Sonora for goodness’ sake. This is no life, and she knows it. Several moments pass where neither can look away, both weighing their desires with the potential consequences.

With a deep breath in, she musters up the courage to ask Bishop what she’s been wanting to for months.

“Stay?”

Her heart feels like it might just explode while she waits for a response.

Bishop drops his head to his chest, cursing under his breath. “Fuck.” If Miguel ever found out… But he already knew what his answer would be. He’d been waiting for the invitation. The heated looks they exchanged, the way her fingers lingered on his when he passed her something. That damned pout she wore when Miguel forgot to send a flower arrangement-- she had no idea Bishop had been the one buying the flowers for some time now. No matter what mood she was in, fresh flowers always brightened her day. He loved watching that lonely look transform into something more lively, curious as she marveled over his choice for the week. He went for variety, slowly learning what she loved and what she just liked; her favorite color, favorite scent.

The subtle tension between them, he wasn’t even certain she noticed. The cash and the bling could’ve blinded her to all other men. But it didn’t.

When the Sun had gone down several hours later, and the guys were gone, Bishop redressed. Belt buckling with a clink, leather sliding over his shoulders easily. He let himself take one last look at her wrapped up in a poofy comforter set. The mustard-yellow velvet complimented her skin in the best way, bringing out a gold undertone. Her eyes seem to have brightened as well. He couldn’t resist leaning over to stroke her sweaty skin. Dark coils stuck to her beautiful face, frizzy in some parts from when she rode him, sweat escaping from her pores, flat in the others from when he laid her on her back and hooked her legs over her shoulders.

He wants to stay, to prop himself up against the intricately carved wood headboard and hold her in his lap while they whisper sweet nothing to each other, but he can’t.

She’s not his, and she won’t ever be, so he leaves her with words whispered like a promise. “Until we meet again, preciosa.”

NOTES || This fic and the collage above was inspired by @isisafrofairy’s gorgeous moodboard! Also, the wonderful “Until we meet again, preciosa” line is hers as well. This is my thank you for the moodboard you made for me. I really leaned on the pictures you used for inspiration and I think I managed to capture/include each element. It was so hard not to ruin the surprise, but I was able to shut tf up for once 😂 I’m really proud of how this turned out, and hopefully you enjoy it just as much! Also, I realize the moodboard had nothing to do with Miguel but he lives in my head rent-free apparently 🥴

GENERAL TAGLIST || @woahitslucyylu @briannab1234 @sheeshgivemeabreak @breakingnewsin-no-oneasked @angelreyesgirl @blessedboo @glimmerglittergirl @apantherinmypastlife @brownsugarcoffy @marvelmaree @starrynite7114 @scuzmunkie @thewarriorprincessxo @sadeyesgf @pearlkitten33 @imanerdychubbyqueen @literaturefeen @ourlittlesecretsoveragain @everyhowlmarksthedead @yourwonkywriter @trulysuccubus @sparklemichele @luckyharley1903 @thesandbeneathmytoes​ @amorestevens​

MAYANS M.C. TAGLIST || @cant-decide-at-this-moment

[thepriceofbeingaroseisloneliness]

“It felt like ‘Let's go as far as we can go’. Maybe this was the biggest chance we would ever get. That was the kind of things I talked with the members. At that moment, we prepared ourselves for the worst.”

Notes before reading: This is from Kaoru’s first book “Dokugen” released on October 2015 in which his articles from “Ongaku to hito” magazine were compiled, but also an exclusive interview about his life was included. I already posted the first part of this interview (Pages 62-75 if you own the book) so for Kaoru’s birthday, I wanted to share the second part of the interview (Pages 130-143). In the first part, the interview covered his childhood to his first steps in the music scene and bands. This part covers from CHARM’s  disbandment to Dir en grey’s  and solo activities. ---- -Is CHARM a band that was formed by classmates? K: Well, there was one classmate and me, the rest were older. If I remember correctly, they were 3 years older? Even though they were the best guitar players among the members, as I wanted to play guitar myself,I told them one of them “play the bass” (laughs). That person and the other guitarist are siblings Originally, the brother and me were good friends so it was him who told me to form a band. It was like “There is no point in keeping (the band) at local level, I want to do a band that will be a stepping stone for the time being”, “If we don’t go out, we won’t make personal connections”. -“Let's get out of Hyogo” K: That's right. Anyway, the purpose of starting this band was to "get out". There was a live house in the local area, and there were some bands that released CDs from amateurs to indies, but the bands that were popular in the local area at that time were bands that wore long-sleeve T-shirts, slim denim pants and rubber soles shoes. There were many people like that in the local studio. There weren’t many bands like us….with long dyed hair…..That’s why I the person who worked part-time at the rental CD shop was super metal and I thought “There are real bandman in this city!”. There weren’t people like that. -You couldn’t make connections with people like you. K: That's right. I rarely meet people like that in my hometown. In order to sell/promote myself, I have to go out first. That's how the band started. -What do you think  that was the best thing you did when you were in the band at that time? K: Doing my best?......what could be? (laughs) Maybe I don't have a feeling of "doing my best", or I don't think I was conscious of "doing my best" for the band. Besides playing the guitar and arranging the songs, I did several things such as miscellaneous work and making flyers but I didn’t do it with the consciousness of "doing my best", I did it anyway. -It was only for fun. K: I think so. It felt like I was making song while playing around, the members also were relaxed. Someone would go home and listen to some CD and say “let’s do something like that”, others would be reading magazines or watching tv next to them. Everyone gathered after work,from 8pm to 11pm, so it was like using that time to be together having fun. -In the series you wrote for “Ongaku to hito”,  you mentioned that you were doing various part-time jobs at this time. K: I was. Sometimes I worked hard/plentifully, and sometimes I only worked for 15 minutes a day -What is a 15-minute job a day? .K: A part-time job that was just going to a pet store when it was closing and put the bird cages or the hamster basket in front of the store, inside the store. The hourly wage was about 1500 yen, but it only took 15 minutes. On the contrary, I also worked part-time for 12 hours. I had a lot of  jobs, I don’t know if I was skilful or I was good at dealing with things but I looked like a competent guy. After a while, my salary went up and my position went up. -Did you want to become a full-time employee?   K: That wasn’t the case. After all, I was doing it while thinking, “I’m in this place now, but I’m a man who won’t end up in a place like this”.  I think I had a strong consciousness like “I’m working in this now for the band”. However, my parents told me every day, “What are you doing?” (laughs). -What did you answer to that? K: “No, it’s ok”. I didn't borrow money from my parents, so I didn't bother them. -Around this time, there was The Great Hanshin Earthquake. I'm sure you were at your part-time job when the earthquake happened. K: That's right. It happened when I was working part-time at a glass factory. It was shaking around, but that always happened when a crane truck passed so I was like “is that it?”. I thought it was different from other times. When I thought about going home, the train stopped, and the ground was also cracked. On the contrary, it was like being in a scene that didn’t seem to be a real.  However, the inside of my house was messed up, but it was okay. The impact of the earthquake affected many places. Many people quit bands because of that. It was just around the time I started playing at a live houses, so I was able to get acquainted not only with the locals but also with a wide range of people, so I thought “this is terrible”. -What was a thing that you could do for the first time with CHARM? K: I think it was a demo tape. I made it for the first time, so I was happy.  A few years ago, I found it at my parent’s home, I brought it here and listened to it….  Surprisingly, the song wasn’t bad. The lyrics were horrible though (laughs). -But CHARM's activities ended in a little over a year. K: Well, weren’t we playing for a year?  I think that maybe there was a difference in the degree of enthusiasm between the other members and me. It was like there was a wall built between me and the other members. They would talk about giving up and I was like “should we?”. However, after disbanding, the other members except me formed a band together, so I was like “Oh, so it was my fault”. Whether the demo tape sold 3000 copies, or the live movements increased, I didn't have money anyway. The more I moved, the less money I had, so I was worried. It was like “Can I do this?”. -What did you do next after the disbandment was decided? K:  I was thinking about going to various live shows and look for members, when I was thinking about doing something like that, KISAKI suddenly called me. He told me “Can you join us as the guitarist is leaving?”. -It was La: Sadie's, a band formed by KISAKI. K: He wasn’t a proper acquaintance, I just greeted him at a live house somewhere so, I should say that he kind of got suddenly in touch with me? -Why was that? K: At that time, there was the word “soft visual kei”. The thing is, there weren’t bands that looked flashy/showy and cool like that. There weren’t many guys that wearing a suit and looking stylish were heavy/ extreme. That’s why, I heard that there weren’t many people who looked flashy like me. -That’s why he had his eyes on you. K: Maybe. I hadn’t seen a live show of them, but there were La:Sadie’s posters on every live house at that time. Also, even though he didn’t see our live performance over there, he just saw the flyer and contacted me (laughs). -So, for now, you went to see them playing live. K: It's the day after (CHARM) disbanded. I didn’t know how they sounded like, but when I watched them performing live, it was the type (of band) I really liked. There was no reason to turn down the offer and in a selfish way I thought “In order to join this band, the previous disband had to happen”.  And I decided to join them. -When it comes to members, you can say that this band was the predecessor band of DIR EN GREY, but what was your impression of them at that time? K: It's still the same, but (my first impression was) they weren’t that good at socializing (laughs). At first it was an exploration. It was like “What should I do when I enter the studio?”. But when I went it, it was like “Eh….is it like this?”. I mean, the song writing was the same as in my previous band but there weren’t many parts to arrange.  If you could make a song to some extent, it would end there. I remember there weren’t many exchanges between us like, “I want to make this rhythm here” or “Let’s take a break”.  It was done exactly what the composer has done in the studio. Well, it wasn’t interesting. -Then, you came up with various ideas. K: That's right. Even at CHARM, I was just arranging rather than writing songs. - After joining under the name of KAORU, the band's recognition has even more. K: About two months after I joined, we first appeared on the monochrome page of "SHOXX". Everyone was happy at that time. Until then, even if the band name was listed in “Pia” and appeared in live house’s information places, it was like "Oh, we appeared in a national magazine!" (Laughs). From there, we advertised ourselves to sell our name, and we did various things. -How was the planning and mobilization (people who came to the concerts) of live performances compared to the previous band? K: When I was invited (to join the band,), it was a band that had already mobilized more than 100 people, so it's completely different. I remember being so excited to be able to play  in front of a lot of people, it was like “This is it!”. I finally got the feeling that I was on the start line. -Did you feel like you could make it as a professional? K: That wasn't the case. After all, no matter if 3000 tapes were sold or the people attending the lives increased, I didn't have the money anyway. Of course, there was some profit, but there was more money being spent. So, my anxiety/insecurity may had been bit.  Like  "Can I do it in these conditions?". -You were still working part-time as usual? K: Of course. Because when I joined, I was like “As we are going on a tour now, how much should I prepare for many days”. There were many talks about money. It was a band only could play  a certain number of lives . I think we played lives about one-third of the year. Even so, I feel hopeless as I didn’t make money working and writing songs. I couldn't afford to think about the future at all. It's the same for the other members, and  I felt like "I wonder if this will end someday." There were many people who said "I might not be able to play for a while”. - By the way, how did you feel as a guitarist at that time? In terms of style and playing. K: It was just like playing with a heavy sound and shaking your head (laughs). The guitar solo….it's about playing a little phrase. I'm not very interested in it now or in the past. -Are you not interested in guitar solo? K: No, I like listening to them. But I don't really want to play them myself…..it’s like, when a solo is being played I don’t feel like “Hey, I want to copy this!”…. More than that, I like when the high-volume sounds get muted (laughs). The feeling is better when I’m playing the riff like *makes the beat sounds* -I'd like to ask you about bands you liked besides X at that time. Around that time, you started listening to NIN INCH NAILS and other overseas bands. K: That's right. I also liked The Smashing Pumpkins and I went to see their live performances. Around that time, I started listening more to foreign bands than Japanese bands. From Japan, I usually listened to LADIES ROOM and Extasy Records bands (Japanese label formed in April 1986 by Yoshiki). -Was COLOR among these bands (You listened to)? K: COLOR is also included. Once around that time, I got invited  by a roadie of a band that was in Free-will but I thought “Free-will is scary” (laughs). I've heard rumours about TOMMY (DYNAMITE TOMMY / COLOR vocalist, founder of Free-will, DIR EN GREY’s label). He is a senpai originally from my hometown. I've never met him there, but I heard a lot about him (laughs). Later, I got to know about COLOR, and I knew that was TOMMY in the band. - And La: Sadie ’s would be over in less than a year. K: That's right. I talked with each member like "What should we do next?" When we realized, it was like the four of us like “Do you want to do a band the four of us together?”. “The feeling of "let's go as far as we can go" Maybe this was the biggest chance we would have. That was the kind of thing I talked with the members. At that moment, we prepared ourselves for the worst.” -Was it like “going with the flow”? K: We weren’t friends like everyone would go drinking together or so, it’s a relationship more like neither too close to nor too distant since that time. There were invitations from other people (bands) to join them, but at that time there wasn’t a band like us, fierce and distant. I think it was a bit like “Let’s do it together” because there wasn’t any other place. There was no other band that I wanted to play music together. From our point of view, there were some questions like “Should the band be more intense/fierce?” and also, that it must be a visually interesting band. - From there, DIR EN GREY started. K: I think we talked about how me wanted to make a band more expansive than La:Sadie’s. But the fierce part was more extreme. Perhaps it was because I was thinking of becoming a band that no one had ever seen, and that made me feel like "we are  definitely doing it!" -Was TOMMY involved since the beginning? K: TOMMY will appear later. But it seems that he has his eyes on us since La:Sadie’s.  At that time, TOMMY was already in charge of bands and took care of them but at that time the chance didn’t come out. But when we were going to disband….. I was told this later but it seems that TOMMY said “I’m going to get a hold of every band that these five people do (laughs)” -By the way, how was your first encounter with TOMMY? K: The person who took care of us at that time said, "TOMMY wants to meet you." "What’s that? Did we do something wrong?" (Laughs).  That’s why I was nervously waiting at TOMMY’s apartment. Speaking of him, I had this image of him wearing a floral coat, a gauze shirt, leather pants  and long boots, and when he came out wearing leather pants and long boots I was like “Wow! It’s true!” (laughs) -That's scary (laughs). K: So when I told him “Thank you so much for inviting me”,  he told me “Keep doing your best”….I was like “Eh?”. I just met him for a while, I didn’t understand at all why did he invite me. He just told me “Take care on your way home”. After that, I came out of Tokyo, and when I started a band here, I already wrote about it in the “Ongaku to hito” series but, it was decided that we recorded immediately. -At a mobile home? K: We made the songs there. We recorded and played lives in Tokyo. Then, we had more and more chances to talk and discuss with TOMMY about the details of the live performances. The next moment, it was decided that we enter  Free-will. -The situation changed since that moment. K: That's right. Under these circumstances I could concentrate on playing in a band and from that time on, producers gradually started to do their part…..Talking about a major debut become something more solid, so we were getting to go  as far as we could. For the next lives, it's was like going up the stairs, step by step. Until then, I was just rushing with the flow, but I started thinking about variations of the songs, the venues for the lives became bigger, so we thought about stage development….. I started to write songs considering the singles, like “let’s make a song like this”. - At that time, did you have any dreams or goals that you all shared as a band? K: (A goal/dream) shared with the members .. .. maybe there wasn’t anything concrete. We were trying our best to keep up with the situation. I personally wanted to make an album. -Something like “We’ll play at Budokan!”? K: I don't think there was. Of course, I thought it would be great if I could play there, but more than that, the members were excited about things like "What about the PV of the next song?" . -You talked about playing a live at Budokan before your debut, but was there anything that you feel couldn’t keep up with because of how fast  things were going? K: I was worried. It was like “Is it ok,can we do this?”, But when DIR started I prepared myself for the worst, it was like “let’s go as far as we can go”. After all, when we were told to come to Tokyo after the band started, I was thinking, “Let’s do this without rushing”. La: Sadie's was just hectic, “Shouldn’t it be better to solidify the base here before going to Tokyo?”, “But maybe this is the biggest chance we are going to have?”, that was what we talked about. “If we don’t go to Tokyo this time, there might not be another chance anymore”. I talked with the members if we should prepare ourselves for any circumstance  and accept it or not. And we decided to do it. -Like, don't miss your biggest chance. K: Yes. Also, at that, we weren’t competing against other bands, as there was almost no relationship or interaction with other bands. There was this feeling that everything that wasn’t us was an enemy. It might feel like “We are not going to lose to any other guys, we are going ahead”. - So, the band made their major debut, but in less than a year you were back indie. How did you feel at this time? K: TOMMY suggested to do what we could do from that moment on. To be honest, at first I couldn’t keep up with that idea. I was like “Why did we come this far?”. -It’s natural to feel like that. K: So TOMMY asked me, "Would you like to do a band where an old man, president of the record company,  tell you to make a song like this?". So when I said “No, I don’t want to do that”, he said “Then, to do what we want to do, let’s protect ourselves”. That’s why while I said “That’s right” I was wondering if we could do this alone. But if we had done it as a major, the band might not have been like it is now. Maybe it would be more commercial, a band that didn’t make songs as a main thing.  That’s why  at that time I was grateful to TOMMY and I don't think he was wrong. - It was  hard to get into the  several hardships  of doing a band from that moment, wasn’t it? K: That's right. It's still the case now, but to tell the truth, I didn’t really have the consciousness of playing music. The feeling of "doing a band" was stronger than the sound. Even if things were hard, it felt like "We are a band". At some point, I wonder if we were chasing a longing/aspiration somewhere. But from that moment on, I think I started thinking, "Let's make a band where we can express ourselves, something that only we can do." -Was the band activity difficult after that? K: It was hard (laughs). From that time on, it was really hard to write songs, I couldn’t make songs anyway.  As I always say, I’m not the type of person that can immediately shape the sound that comes out. I’ll play what I’ve made while thinking “Is this really good?”.  If my guitar skills were better, it might had been possible to shape it in a cool way, but it wasn’t the case. It seems that you can't compete with your own guitar. That’s why I couldn’t intertwined everything, the rhythm, riffs, and melody in a cool way. -In other words, you have to make a song while imagining the whole result. K: But isn’t that the most uncertain part?  Don’t you do it without knowing what each member is going to play? Perhaps, the biggest thing is that I'm not confident in myself. It’s like I came to this point only with heavy work (laughs) - Well then, you've made many albums with that. K: Right? (laughs) But….. I think I can only make it that way. -What was the first album that made you think "I was able to do it!" K: After all…..it's "MACABRE" (released in 2000). I felt like "I made it!" Before this one, "GAUZE" (released in 1999) contained 5 singles, so I had a strong sense of filling the gaps, but "MACABRE" has a strong sense of creating one album. Also, from that point on, not only the songs but also the consciousness of the sounds changed. The sound became very hard. -Have you ever thought about leaving the band? K:…….. Yes. Yes, there are always moments like that. But it’s  not like "let's quit" but more like "want to escape". Even now, I often feel like giving up while writing songs, I feel like "I can't do it anymore". -Still, what keeps you in the band is…. K: It’s a strange way to say it, but it’s like while I’m thinking about that, there is a part of me saying, “Will you do it?”. There is another me. This one always says "Please do your best!" and the other is like "Yes, I'll do it" (laughs). In other words, everything is up to you. Another self inspires the part of  me who is about to give up. It's like that. -What do you think about bands that have disbanded? K: I think it's a waste. It’s like “Why are you quitting?”. I haven't quit, so I don't know how I would feel about quitting.So, if I quit the band, it would really end there. “Let’s do a comeback”, but after all, it’s over. So, no matter how hard I think it is, I don't want to say, "It’s over".  Because it’s like "If you say it's over, it's all over". -Now, I asked you to look back on your half-life as a bandman so far. What about the future? K: That's right.  It’s like…. There are times I think it's not interesting anymore. It’s not interesting so I’m like "I think I can explore more" and things like that, but I get back on the rails before I knew it.  It’s like “If you don’t do it with all your heart, in the end it’s going to be a band that is just active”. The more you continue, the more troubles you will have. Constantly I'm thinking about what if we can’t go ahead, but we also value our own personality, that's why you just can't do the same thing.  -I feel like you are always looking for something. K: I always think about "something more". I get worried because it doesn't come out though. But the fact that the band can still do it, it’s is there. If I think “Well, someday”,  I think I’d be lost. -At this point, the members are making moves with solo activities. K: After all, there are things they can’t do with DIR EN GREY, so I think they are doing it elsewhere. So, when I think about it, in my case, there's nothing I can't do with DIR EN GREY. After all,  even if it is just once, before I die I have to try to make my own album, but what I want to do now can be done with DIR EN GREY. Of course, I also want to know my limits and possibilities, so I'd like to try making a work by myself someday. It's a personal goal. -You could say that this book is the first result of your solo work. K: Yes. It’s a strange way of saying it, but it feels good the first thing I put out by myself was a  book. It’s like really relaxing…..you can do it without putting too much effort.  Of course, this is the first time I've made a book, so I wonder if I should just put what I want to do into it. If this were a about making one album, I would think about various things like "I'm doing this song with DIR, I'm sorry". I don't have that kind of annoyance, and I can do what I want to do within myself. Also,  (expressing myself) in words like this……it's a bit exaggerated to say it in this way, but I think I had a lot of things I wanted to convey in words. I also realized that.

[bluebellwriting]

Love Me Tender Part 6

Hey folks! I know it’s been a minute, I’ve been super busy with work and school, but I’m by no means done with this piece and you know I had to post something for Valentine’s Day (to make up for the fact that single and lonely 😆😭)

Despite popular belief, Hell does in fact freeze over. It’s Hell, after all, and in the world of pain and torture, everything is fair game. And it’s February, historically one of the coldest months for you back when you were living and certainly the most miserable in Hell too. The roads are slick with sheets of ice, you can’t walk a block without a three-foot icicle nearly spearing itself through you, and everyone’s car is perpetually trapped in a snowbank thanks to Lucifer’s “generous snow plow program.” Each winter day reminds you of the worst snow cyclones from when you were growing up in Brooklyn, cold yes, but in a way it’s all very sentimental. They remind you of the winter nights cuddled up with your siblings, hot chocolate in hand, listening to the winds blustering against your windows. It’s all rather lovely, in a strange way.

Your boyfriend of four months does not seem to agree, if the way he’s gripping you and nuzzling into your neck is anything to go by. You’ve been trying to extricate yourself from your practically shared bed for the last ten minutes, but each attempt only causes Alastor to pull you closer. He’s basically on top of you now, those boney forearms are stronger than you’d think.

“Sweetheart,” you whisper. “It’s time to get up.”

Alastor groans but otherwise your voice falls on deaf ears.

“Come on, we have to make breakfast and then--”

“But darling, it’s freezing,” he sighs. “And why would I go anywhere when I have my own personal heater right here.”

It’s really hard to stay mad at him, especially when he places sweet little kisses from your cheek to your shoulder and back again.

“Well your personal heater has some errands to run and needs to get her day started.”

“Ugh,” Alastor whines and inch by inch, begins to roll off of you. “How can you even stand to be out in that unbearable cold? Don’t you want to stay right here with me, your loving and adoring boyfriend?”

“You know I would,” you boop his nose. “But then I wouldn’t be able to get your present.” 

His ears perk up immediately.

“Present?” He coos. “A present for lil’ ol’ me? Dearest, you shouldn’t have.”

“Yes, but I can’t pick it up until I get out of this bed.”

“Oh fine. I suppose I have some things to do for tonight as well,” he teases and kisses you on the nose before finally allowing you to shift out of bed.

“Although before you leave me,” he whines. “I have a little something to kick off the festivities.”

With a snap of his fingers, a red garment manifests in your arms.

“Oh, Alastor.” You run your hands over the thick velvet of the dress. “It’s lovely.”

“This is just the beginning, love. Now go try it on,” he shoos you off to the bathroom, then immediately curls back up into the comforter to protect himself from the draft leaking in from your window. 

The dress is beautiful and warm. As soon as you change into it and assess yourself in the bathroom mirror it hits you that this has to be a customized dress. It fits you far too perfectly and the fabric is so soft, it’s like a blanket heating you up and snuggling you in. It’s either custom or enchanted with Alastor’s magic. Or maybe both, you wouldn’t put it past him to make this the perfect dress.

The last four months together have been a dream. A blissful and rapturous dream that you never want to wake up from. If you thought he was sweet before you began dating, then this is an entirely new level. You two are practically glued to the hip, and he finds a way to make every possible moment so enthralling and exciting that it doesn’t even matter. 

Everything about him is just enthralling, and the best part is that he can’t seem to get enough of you either. It makes your face warm and your mouth split into a grin just thinking about it.

You poke your head out of the bathroom door and giggle at the sight of Alastor in his own personal blanket cocoon. 

“Comfortable?” You ask.

“I’d be more comfortable if you were here with me.”

“While that sounds tempting, I wouldn’t want to ruin my fabulous new dress.”

He shoots up, blanket still around his shoulders, eyes wide and alert and trained on the way the bodice clings to your curves. It’s even more perfect than he could have expected.

“Do you like it?” He scoots to the edge of the bed and holds his arms out for you to step into.

“I love it.” You smile and step between his legs to fall into his embrace. “It’s perfect. Thank you, my love.”

“That’s just the beginning, dear,” he cheers.

“Alastor, you didn’t--”

“Nonsense! It’s our first Valentine’s together and it must be the best of all time!” Ever one for theatrics, with a flourish of his arm the room is filled with red roses.

“Oh my goodness,” you giggle and cup his face in your hands. “You darling man.”

Alastor melts into your hands, letting the softness of your palms warm his cheeks.

“Only for you, love.” He leans forward and nuzzles your nose. “Happy Valentine’s Day, sweetheart.”

“Happy Valentine’s Day, dear.”

If you weren’t worried about getting to the store and back in time, you would have stayed here, exactly like this, for hours more. 

“Let’s begin the day, shall we, love?” You whisper.

“But it’s cold!” He whines. “And you’re so warm!”

“Ugh, you’re such a southern boy,” you tease and pull away from him, if only to draw him out of his blanket nest and into the world. 

“You love this southern boy,” he laughs and finally rises. With a quick snap, he’s dressed in a redder-than-average suit with one of the red roses on your floor now pinned to his lapel.

He hands you your coat, gloves, hat, scarf, and tries to force another sweater upon you but you stop him before you’re a complete bundle of wool and layers.

---

Charlie must have gotten up early because the entire lobby is littered with hearts and confetti. Chocolates are on every available surface and your fearless leader is currently snuggling with Vaggie in matching heart sweaters. You watch Angel hand Husk a box of chocolates wrapped in a lovely bow. Hesitantly, Husk opens the box and spits out whatever he was drinking all over your brother before stomping away with a red face.

“What did you do to that poor man?” You call over.

“Just gave him an innocent token of my affections,” Angel chimes and shows you the contents of the box: three rows of chocolates with letters printed on each piece, spelling out “Best Dick Ever.”

“Angel, that is so vulgar,” you exclaim.

“It’s the day of love, sis.” Angel pops one of the pieces into his mouth.

“That is not love, my fellow,” Alastor chastises.

 “Aww, that’s cute coming from you, strawberry pimp.”

“I’ll have you know that I am plenty romantic,” Alastor says incredulously. “Aren’t I, (Y/N)?”

“You are, love. The most romantic,” you coo. “Now I have to get going. Please be nice, boys.”

“And you,” Alastor leans down to pull your scarf tighter around you, “promise me that you will be careful. You’re sure I can’t come with you?”

“I’m sure, love. I’ll be fine. Angel,” you turn to him. “Be nice.”

“’K, mom,” he calls back to you, waving as you begin your journey into the chilly winds.

“So,” Angel drawls, sidling up to Alastor. “What are you doing for my sister on this ever most sacred day of love and affection?”

“Something special and perfect and I will not have you distracting me,” Alastor sighs and snaps his fingers, transporting himself to his cottage deep in the woods of the Pentagram. Because only a crazy person would want to walk out in that cold. Good thing Alastor loves your kind of crazy.

---

It’s been a while since Alastor has been to his home, his actual home, one that is reminiscent of the large, Queen Anne-style homes of New Orleans. Dust is collecting on the counters and window sills, but that’s nothing that some quick magic can’t fix. The real task at hand is the redecorating and the meal he has to prepare for tonight to be as perfect as can be. This is certainly not the first time that you’ve been to his home but he’s hoping that it will be the last time that he calls it “his home.”

If he had it his way, tonight would be the night that Alastor asked you to marry him, to spend the rest of eternity -- or as long as you’d have him at least -- together in Hell as husband and wife, as partners in crime until the very fabric of the universe began to fray at the seams. He’s known for so long, long before you began your courtship, that he wanted to marry you and it took everything within him not to propose to you on your first date. But he had to be patient, suave, a perfect gentleman, because the last thing he wanted to do was scare you off with a hasty courtship and engagement. The last man who had attempted that with you, well, Alastor was still in the process of hunting him down so he could offer you his head on a spit. That was supposed to be the second part of your Valentine’s gift but alas, the wretched soul was more slippery than he had anticipated.

Hopefully you’d be impressed enough by the way he had decorated the house with some of your favorite colors and furniture from the 1940s, things to make it look more like a home you could share and grow into. 

---

The beauty about Hell in the wintertime is that there are so few people out on the streets to bother you. The sidewalks and roads are eerily quiet, the snow swallowing up distant sounds so the only ones left is the crunch of your boots. Your trip to Rosie’s had been quick, as the poor woman was overrun with sinners trying to buy up last-minute Valentine’s gifts. As she said to you in passing while gift wrapping some tacky jewelry for a panicked demoness, “good for business, bad for relationships.”

You clutched your gift bag close to your chest, guarding it from any muggers who would even dare steal the most perfect gift for your Alastor. This was weeks in the making and you were not about to let someone ruin your first good Valentine’s Day. 

You approached the door to the hotel, already anticipating a warm fire to warm your cheeks and nose, when suddenly an arm is around you and you’re no longer in front of the hotel. No, after blinking your eyes to readjust, you’re now staring at Alastor’s home, which means the arm and body hugging you close belongs to your sweet, adoring, and sometimes startling beau.

“Alastor!” You squeal. “What have I told you about surprising me like that?”

“I’m sorry, love,” he chuckles. “But I just couldn’t have you out in the cold any longer.”

“If this wasn’t a day dedicated to love you’d be buried in snow right now,” you grumble.

“I don’t doubt that, sweetest. Now come on, the fire is waiting for you.”

When Alastor first brought you into his home it was your one-month anniversary. You were actually relieved when it wasn’t a massive mansion like most Overlords pick for themselves, and you couldn’t help but be charmed by the perfectly retro, 1920s decor.

But it’s different now. The living room has new, floral wallpaper and some of the furniture reminds you of... your old home back in New York.

“You redecorated,” you shiver as you allow the warmth of the home heat up your body. Alastor rubs his hands up and down your shoulders to warm you up as soon as your coat and layers have been shed.

“Do you like it?” He asks, a glimmer of hope igniting in his eyes.

“Oh it’s lovely,” you breathe and inhale, smelling the hot meal he’s probably slaved over. “Just surprising. What brought this on?”

“Oh, just, wanted to try something new. Are you ready for dinner?”

“I’ve been salivating since I first stepped into the door.”

Dinner is delicious, mouth wateringly incredible and cajun. But all throughout dinner you couldn’t help but notice the way Alastor’s knee bounced or the way his hand shook whenever he held his fork to his mouth. Not to mention the eery quiet between you two. You can’t seem to get more than a one-word response out of him. It makes your heart drop, and the way his eyes shift away from your gaze makes a pit form in your stomach.

“Alastor, love. Is everything alright?”

His eyes dart up to meet yours. His teeth worry his bottom lip and you can hear his fingers tapping excessively on his seat.

“Of course, darling. Everything is right as rain. Are you enjoying your food?”

“It’s amazing, Al. It’s always amazing.” You beam at him and reach across the table to hold on to his hand.

“If you don’t have any more delightful surprises for me, love, could I give you my gift now?”

“(Y/N) you didn’t--”

“I won’t even dignify that with a response.”

Reaching down beside your chair, you pull out the perfectly wrapped present and slide it across the table to him.

“It’s not much,” you explain. “But I hope you like it.”

It’s perfect. So perfect, the wrapping, the bow, the very idea that his darling has given him a gift at all, that he doesn’t even want to open it. As much as he wants to tear it open, there’s the urge to keep this moment preserved in his mind forever and ever, just in case his present to you goes south tonight.

But from the way you’re looking at him, eyes wide and hopeful, he knows he has to open it right now.

Inside is a little plastic... view finder? He’s really never seen anything like this. They look like binoculars but there’s a little white disk inside with small film negatives along the circumference.

“It’s a reel viewer,” you explain. “Put it up to your eyes and click the lever.”

So he does. And with each click he’s met with little candids of you and him, some from before your relationship began, some from after, all of them more perfect than the last and preserved forever just for him. His heart swells and warms an overwhelming amount. His joy leaks from his mouth and eyes, until it feels like the sun itself is pouring through his teeth and tears.

“Oh, (Y/N), darling...” he sniffles.

“I know it’s not much but--”

“It’s everything, dearest.” It really is. And more importantly it’s enough for him to get his act together. He feels like he can breathe again, like the fog of doubt has finally been lifted. What was he so worried about? You love him, of course, you love him.

“It’s perfect.” He rises and comes to kneel before you. “More lovely and wonderful than you will ever know. So much better than my gift to you but I hope you will love it all the same. I love it, (Y/N). I love you. So, so very much, dearest.”

“Alastor, I’m going to love anything you give me because I love you, sweetheart.” You peck his nose.

“Yes, well, that’s the thing. Because really, this feels more like just another gift from you to me.”

“Is it now?” You tease.

“It is...” he sighs. “I love you. I hope you never have to doubt that for an instant in your life. And I know this might be too soon, and you can say no for now, or forever, but I have never doubted for a minute that you are the one for me. My gift to you, love, sweetheart, darling dearest, is this.” 

He motions to the dining room.

“The... dining room?”

“No, love,” he chuckles. “The house. My house... Our house. If you’ll have it. If you’ll have me.”

You gasp and tears flood your eyes so quickly that you have to blink them away to see Alastor’s hopeful eyes properly.

“You’re asking me to move in with you?”

“I am. I’m asking you to make this house, our home.”

“Oh, Alastor.” You launch forward and wrap your arms around his neck. You press your lips to his in a bruising kiss, letting him bundle you up in his own arms and grip your waist.

You pull way for a brief moment, short enough to mumble out a fervent series of ‘yeses.’ 

“Of course,” you say between kisses to his face. “Of course, I’ll move in with you.”

[darklightmiwxo]

MIW history

Hello I want to make a history and facts post of MIW. I been a fan for a few months so I may miss some stuff out. New fans can check this out to understand more of the band.

Motionless in white members:

[IMG=OAA]

Name: Chris motionless (cerulli)

Full name: Christopher Cerulli)

Age: 34

Birthday: October 17 1986

Zodiac: Libra

Birth place: Scranton Pennsylvania

Height: 6'1

Role: main singer

Relationship Status: single

Chris says he doesn't want to get married.

Fear: heights and flying

Personality: a really kind person who cares for his fans he's funny and has a dad humor. Everyone just see him as a dad to them.

Interest: Chris really loves dogs. He plays video games halo and call of duty he plays it all the time. His fave bands is slipknot,marlin manson,korn,HIM,and more rock bands.

[IMG=EOZ]

Name: Ricky Olson (horror)

Full name: Richard Alison Olson the third

Nick name: Rick

Age: 32

Birthday: September 1st 1988

Birth place: Seattle WA

Lives: Scranton Pennsylvania

Zodiac: Virgo

Height: 5'6

Uni: he studied film production in college but dropped out for the band.

Role: rhythm guitarist and backing vocalist

Relationship status: taken by Jamie L

Fear: dying alone,being hated,failing

Personality: he's a calm sweet person he's very smart and also really kind. He's a good caring friend. However he can be a troll sometimes and mess around with everyone because he loves doing it. He loves his fans so much. He's a shy boy.

Interest: he loves to write,draw,edit,take photos, record videos,run his YouTube channel,create a mini sketch video to post on his channel, being a director,he loves cats and reading books.

Ricky fave bands is: muse,HIM,afi,slipknot,BMTH,Ariana grande,Ellie goulding.

[IMG=NEP]

Name: Vinny Mauro

Full name: Vinchenzo Mauro

Nick name: vin,chenzo,sachetti

Nationality: Italian American

Age: 27

Birthday: Nov 22 1993

Birth place: jersey shore Pennsylvania

Zodiac: Sagittarius

(he's also a Sagittarius Scorpio cusp)

Height: 5'6

Uni: vinny study computer programming but he dropped out of college to join the band in 2014

Role: drummer

Bands: MIW,suffer club,trap demon

Relationship Status: single

Fear: being hated by people

Personality: in most of Ricky vlogs vinny seem extroverted he is loud around friends and has lots of fun being silly. But in reality there is a side to him that isn't easy to see you can see it in his twitch stream. He's actually really introverted he said this himself. He's calming and sweet he interact with fans a lot and making sure fans respect each other. He loves to be alone in his room for many days avoiding human contact. Vinny mention being too shy to go up to new people but he is fine if people go up to him. He doesn't feel comfortable talking to new people. He likes being alone.

Interest: creating rap beats,playing video games,making music,dogs and cats,playing drums.

Vinny fave artist are: Fall out boy,paramore,korn,panic! At the disco,HIM,my chemical romance,arch enemy,maroon 5,emeiem,Ariana grande,dua lipa,Mack millo,doji cat,bring me the horizon,pierce the veil,sleeping with sirens,all time low,black veil brides,Rihanna,linkin park,green day,evanescences.

[IMG=XHH]

Name: Ryan Sitkowski

Age: 30

Birthday: Jan 8,1991

Zodiac: Capricorn

Birth place: Pennsylvania

Height: 5'11?

Uni: he dropped out of college to join MIW

Role: lead guitarist

Relationship Status: taken

Fear: spiders

Personality: Ryan is a chill person he's shy and caring to fans. He's also a troll he loves to mess around with his friends.

Interest: guitar,video games,trading card games.

Bands: the same as the rest of miw probably.

[IMG=QFE]

Name: Justin morrow

Age: 32?

Birthday: May 11th

Birth place: Caledonia, New York

Zodiac: Taurus

Height: 6'1

Role: bassist

Relationship Status: married

Fear: ?

Personality: Justin is a kind chill person who cares for his fans and his friends. He left ice nine kills to right away help MIW on tour. Justin is also a troll he loves trolling his friends.

Interest: videos games but not a nerd like the others,bass,cosplaying,putting makeup on.

Bands: the same as MIW

Motionless in white history:

The band started in high school of 2005

Chris,Angelo,Frank p,Kyle white being the first members of the band. Later after college and the bands demo releases Josh joined the band. Frank moved to bass. Micheal and TJ join as guitarist. Later on micheal left the band and Chris met Ryan. Ryan then joined as guitarist of the band. Chris met Ricky in 2009. Frank left the band and Ricky was the new bassist for MIW.

MIW got more popular in 2009 when they tour around the state's in a van. Tj left the band a year later to join escape the fate (Ronnie radke of falling in reverse old band and bless the fall singer Craig band) Ricky then became the new rythmn guitarist of the band. Ghost (Devin) join as the bass player of the band. During the infamous album creation Angelo was feeling ill he couldn't play drums well anymore he gets tired easily and his drum skills wasn't good at all he was eating bad that it make him weak. He couldn't drum anymore so he left the band. The band had other drummers help record their albums. Brandon was the touring drummer for the band till the end of the reincarnated album. The band met vinny and he became the new drummer he was in the reincarnated music video playing drums but you can't see him much in the music video. Vinny then became a member of MIW not a tour drummer anymore but a actually member of MIW. Josh left the band around this time. In the graveyard shift era after the making of the album the whole band kicked ghost out of the band because the fans told the band what ghost did to fans which was very gross. The band kicked him out and Justin from ice nine kills join the band as bassist then he quit ice nine kills to be working full time for MIW. Disguise is the first album where the whole current members of the band created songs without other people doing it for them.

Chris history from high school to now:

Chris grew up in Pennsylvania. He met his friends who end up being the band members of the band he wanted to create he wasn't expecting to be the main singer. At a young age Chris started getting tattoos everywhere.

Chris cared about the band and just went for it.

Demos of the band was created. Chris is a perfectionist he wants the album to be perfect so he was judging everything in order to make a album he liked. Band members left but he didn't quit the band he try to find new band members and try to meet new bands. He worked hard for the band he carry the whole band and make sure the band was doing well. Chris thanks Ryan and Ricky for being the most loyal band members staying with him all these years and not leaving him. Chris had the fear of failing the band breaking up and Chris dreams crushing down but Chris didn't let that happen at all. And here we are today.

Ryan Sitkowski college to now:

Ryan dropped out of college to join MIW at age 17. He was new to the band and Josh didn't like him at all. Ryan was at a young age traveling all over the state with the band. Ryan haven't shared much of his life on the internet he kept it more private. Ryan got a girlfriend and then when the lockdown happen he started streaming on twitch to interact with fans and made a discord too.

Ricky Olson high school to now:

Ricky is the oldest of his siblings. When Ricky was young he was playing with his friends sports and something hit his tooth so half of Ricky teeth is fake. He mention he cry to his mom on the phone because of it. Ricky in middle school wanted to be in a band because his friends played instruments and he wanted to join them. Ricky in high school was a shy boy who had a few friends but they were mostly fake friends. Ricky Olson begin to play guitar and write stories because of the inspiration of Ville Valo from HIM. He became obsessed with HIM. Ricky was in a band in high school as the lead singer but was kicked out for sounding like Ville valo. One of Ricky dreams was to be in a band and also a film maker. In college he study film production. While also working in band merch booth selling band merch to people. But since Ricky was too shy he got yelled at for not speaking up and selling more. Ricky was in a bad time around 2008 and 2009. He share this in a blog years ago about this. He was in a lost place had a bad past and he was thinking of the past all the time and future worrying about failing the future he wanted to be in a band but he was so lost he had no idea what to do in his life. He would day dream about being in a band and then cry to sleep every night about his life. He had depression and gave up with everything in his life. He drank achoul every day. One day on his sister 16 birthday Ricky was drunk coming home from work to go to his parents house his sister was sleeping in her bed.

Tw// self harm and suicide attempt:

Ricky was laying in his sister's bed he cut his arm with a knife it was a lot Ricky was sobbing while watching the blood going down his arm to the floor his dad saw what happen and ask Ricky what happen. Ricky was sobbing and yelling he wanted to die many times. He passed out and went to the hospital he lost a lot of blood and the achoul level was really high he drank way too much. He almost died. He end up getting better and went to see a therapist. He went to see MIW with a friend. Ricky met Chris and the band thought Ricky was cool so he invited them to stay at his house. Chris text Ricky being like should join our band. Ricky would often say idk if I should he didn't know if he would be good enough for the band.

He later on join and quit college but Ricky mention still feeling depressed while in the band. Josh ballaz disliked Ricky when he joined too. 2 years later Ricky moved to rythmn guitarist but he wasn't used to playing guitar since he mostly did bass so he often made mistakes on guitar. He was still learning to play guitar. Things got better for Ricky. But his dream job was always filming he does some film stuff on tour and at home. Though he knew he probably won't be a film maker for movies like he dream of doing he makes whatever he can make. Ricky has stomach problems he often went to the doctor because of it.

Vinny Mauro childhood to now:

Vinny is one of the youngest children of his family. He has many siblings. Vinny mention on stream that he had a bad past. He mention that his dad would take achoul all the time and not give a fuck about vinny. Vinny mom would always go after Vinny. Vinny as a kid was a trouble maker he would disobey his parents and think it was funny. His mom would throw stuff at him and threaten him. His dad gave him a drum set so vinny end up learning to play drums he self taught himself to play drums. He listen to music and got into new types of music he likes all types of music. In middle school a girl that he liked asked him if he can play paramore on drums and vinny played it for her.

In high school vinny was a outcast and loner he made friends in his neighborhood but at school he had no friend. He didn't fit in with anyone. He mention in Ricky Olson podcast his high school life. Ricky ask him how he didn't find friends in high school. Vinny mention saying he didn't fit in with anyone he is also a shy person so he doesn't go up to new people. He was more a loner and was fine with it. Vinny went to uni to study computer programming but he didn't like it at all he was often bored he posted videos of him drumming on his YouTube channel. He knew a guy who knew MIW. MIW was looking for a drummer and they asked vinny to try out for drums in another country which was Australia. Vinny dropped out of college and told his parents what he was doing they weren't happy about that but he end up going over there trying out drums but he was very nervous. He met the band and then went to start drumming. Chris and Ricky were in the same room as vinny they were watching him play drums. Chris being very judgemental. He often scares Ricky when he's on guitar and Ricky fear to make a single mistake in front of Chris and vinny felt that fear. He even said I think I mess up a few times on drums. After he finish drumming. Ricky and Chris went to talk said not a single word and vinny was sweating so much thinking he made a mistake and he won't be part of the band. Later on Chris made vinny part of the band. Vinny became the tour member of the band then he became a member of MIW.

Years later vinny decided to interact more with fans since he had time to so he livestreams on twitch and has discord to interact with fans.

The lock down happen and vinny spend time interacting with fans. He lives with his friend in a house together. But something about vinny these few years mostly months to now that was starting to show. Vinny was suddenly showing signs of depression he often tweet depressing stuff but each year got worst for him. 2020 was the start of vinny's down fall. He had so much self hate he hated his hair,his body,his looks everything about himself he hate. He even tweeted saying I'm sad so I'm going to make a song. He release alone. Even he tweeted about something sad saying 2020 was a bad start for him and Ricky ask if he was ok and hoping vinny was just joking around. During December vinny had back pains because of a sneeze that hurt his nerves so vinny was in so much pain and he didn't see a doctor he thought he could fight it himself just taking pain meds to him. In Jan of 2021 the start of vinny down hill. He was in so much pain he couldn't leave his room or chair he couldn't even drum. He was very depressed. He hated life so much. A month later he got better and went back to streaming but still he was struggling there was some bad stuff happening anyway with him. The covid shot made him sick Saying he didnt eat anything for 4 days he felt like throwing up he even woke up in the middle of the night thinking he was going to do it and other stuff that made him depressed. Around April of this year small amount of fans notice something was going on with vinny he mention so much self hate about himself. In May he mention he was fine but a week later he said he was depressed and talking about what happen months ago and years ago. Sharing something about his family past and he stopped himself saying he doesn't want to get too into it. Vinny mention that he was eating food once a day because he felt like he is fat for over eating food all the time so he end up just eating dinner only everyday. He done it since the beginning of March and still is doing it. He wanted to loss weight. So he doesn't want breakfast and lunch but he eats dinner.

Around may vinny was in rock bottom he talk to no one at all even Ryan was 30 mins away from vinny and he ask him why he didn't go to see him and vinny said he didn't know why. Vinny mention saying he talked to no one for a week straight he also mention he isn't the kind of person to go up to people he said he's very introverted. he stopped streaming for weeks because he was doing bad. He said he felt burnt out and tired.

He took his break off social media for many weeks. Around this time many fans notice vinny was really not doing well.

Then he return to streaming around the 18th of June. Just to say hi he said he miss his fans but he plans to stream again a few weeks later. He mention that he have been avoiding all human contact and was staying in his room playing video games and drums all day still with the once a meal thing he does. Vinny said he's not depressed but people ask him about his depressing tweets and he said is it really depressing. Someone ask him why he is listening to sad music and he said am I not allowed to enjoy music. Now more fans are worried about him. Many more fans noticing that vinny isn't ok and he's hiding it.

That's basically all of MIW history I could give.

I will update and add more to the list later when something new happens. The vinny stuff is true I been watching his streams a lot and he mention those stuff so I just wanted to share what he said. I been a MIW fan for 8 months so I may not know Ryan and Justin as much as the others. Since they don't share much about themselves.

Hoping you enjoy this. Free feel to comment somethings I forgot to add.

Please don't argue about ghost ok. Ty

[mostlycompetentwriter]

TMT One-Shot

F/M Pairing: Y/N x 3racha (Stray Kids)

Word Count: 8K

Genre: High School AU

Warnings: Lots of smut and language; mentions of alcohol

Summary: Y/N is the shy, awkward girl who can’t talk to boys while doing her best to exist as a shadow throughout her high school life. Her two brothers, Minho and Felix, are the complete opposite. Minho is the cool, suave music addict who wants to be in his own band one day, while Felix is the stereotypical popular kid whose best friend, Han Jisung, tirelessly trails after his friend’s older sister. However, despite their differences, the three siblings share a very close relationship and Y/N considers them to be her only real friends. 

One day, Minho brings home two classmates from his community college and Y/N realizes, for the very first time, that the sweet taste of desire is highly addictive.

When my mother died, I was only 10-years-old. She slipped away like a ghost, quietly and without notice, and I was left feeling broken on the inside. If I was a therapist, unlike the contemptuous older woman who always spoke to me with a condescending tone, I’d likely attribute the traumatic event to the person I started to become. 

Instead of bouncing back from her death like my brothers Minho and Felix, I started to feel sad all the time. Accordingly, I lost many of the friends I met in Elementary school because I chose to sit quietly in my classes when I didn't feel like talking to anyone else. Likewise, I also declined their invitations to visit their houses or ride with their parents to the movie theaters. Actually, I exchanged those friendships for the solitude of my bedroom at home where I usually spent the evening staring vacantly at the ceiling while trying not to cry anymore.

Yeah, I guess it was kinda my fault.

Overtime, my status evolved from the kind, amiable Y/N who everyone at school admired, to the sullen and despondent weird girl who sometimes spoke to imaginary friends. I spent recesses inside with my teachers, helping them clean the whiteboard. During lunch, I sat alone with my school tray and thought about how my mother used to pack my lunches for me because I complained about the mystery meatloaf....Oh, right, thinking about my mother inevitably made me feel sad again and sometimes I cried at school in front of my classmates. 

Needless to say, my youth wasn’t exactly as voracious as my peers...or even my brothers for that matter. Actually, Minho and Felix were perfectly normal because they mourned our mother’s death for several months before inexplicably moving on as if it had never happened. Thereafter, Minho developed a passion for music and my father allowed him to take guitar and piano lessons after school. Felix started to play sports and he was quite good at baseball despite his smaller stature. Likewise, in between classes, I heard my classmates frequently gossiping about my brothers: mysterious and alluring Minho who all the older girls adored, and popular and beloved Felix who was the envy of our classmates. 

I didn’t mind being considered an outsider in comparison to my brothers because they still treated me like a friend. In fact, my brothers and I were extremely close, especially after our mother’s death. Despite my introverted tendencies, Minho and Felix often went out of their way to include me in their activities. For example, Minho liked to offer his demos as background music for the raunchier parties in our town and he always begged me to come along and hear his new songs. My older brother was so incredibly talented that I rarely refused his offers, finding myself sitting next to Felix in the backseat of Minho’s car while we drove across town to the wealthier districts. I would spend the rest of the night hanging around my brothers while listening to Minho sing about everything from his ex-girlfriends to the pot he liked to smoke with some of the younger guys.

In any case, I could always count on my brothers to liven my spirits, which might explain why I was so uncomfortable when Minho graduated and applied for University. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing because Minho was only driving thirty minutes everyday to attend his classes and he still lived at home. But it still felt like an unwanted change, and I wasn’t sure how to cope with my brother’s sudden desire to build a studio in the basement of our childhood home while he brought new classmates to fawn over his equipment.

Thankfully, I managed to avoid the unfamiliar faces, and I started spending more time with Felix. Unfortunately, spending time with Felix inevitably forced me to endure the endless pandering from some of his more unsavory acquaintances. For example, when I wanted to play video games one afternoon, I knocked twice on Felix’s door only to find myself in the company of someone who was decidedly the complete opposite of my brother. His name was Han Jisung, and he was Felix’s best friend. “Y/N,” he said quietly, sheepishly attempting to fix the mop on top of his head. “How are you?”

“Fine,” I said, glancing over Jisung’s shoulder. “Where’s Felix?”

“Bathroom,” Jisung said, pointing at the door. 

I groaned. “Are you busy?”

“We’re never too busy for you,” Jisung smirked, but he always flirted with me shamelessly as if he didn’t care that I was Felix’s older sister.

I ignored Jisung when I walked into Felix’s bedroom, finding a relatively clean spot on his bed to wait for his return. In the meantime, Jisung lingered by the doorway, watching me with those ridiculous dark eyes. “I heard Minho made another demo.”

“He’s always making demos,” I replied, wondering why Felix was determined to take his time for once.

“Yeah, but he’s really proud of this one.”

“Minho thinks he’s a genius,” I said. “If you were to ask him, then every song he made would be a masterpiece.”

“Well, he’s the reason why I've started to pursue music.”

“You?” I scoffed, finding the idea of Jisung as a creator of anything other than enormous messes on the kitchen counter to be nothing short of hilarious. “Jisung, you can’t even finish your math homework.”

“That’s not true!” Jisung protested. “It’s just not that interesting, and I like music so it shouldn’t be a problem.”

“You’ll find something else to like in a few months,” I said, watching as he frowned with that ridiculous pout he always wore when he wasn’t getting his way.

“Yeah? Well, when my first mixtape comes out,” Jisung grumbled. 

“I’ll be the first one asking for an autograph,” I teased him, rolling my eyes when he sat next to me and held up his pinky finger.

“Promise?”

“Fine,” I sighed before trying to move further away from Jisung.

He didn’t allow the space for very long, sliding right up against me without any traces of his previous frustrations. “Y/N,” Jisung said, hand reaching out for my shoulder. “There’s a party this Friday.”

“I’m not in the mood for a party,” I said. “I have a lot of homework this weekend, and-”

“Actually, Minho invited us,” Felix interrupted, and I didn’t even realize that my brother had returned. I was also surprised to see Minho behind him, stretching his arms above his head like he had forgotten to sleep again last night.

“You’re going too?” I asked Minho.

“It’s Chan’s party,” Minho explained. “He’s playing some of my demo tracks.”

“Bang Chan,” I repeated, narrowing my eyes because I had heard my brother mention that name dozens of times. Actually, if I didn’t know any better, then I would think Minho had some kind of infatuation with his new college friend.

“I think Minho is in love,” Felix teased, dodging Minho’s playful swing before he joined Jisung and I on the edge of his bed.

“He’s just a friend from one of my lectures,” Minho said. 

“Minho also thinks he’s a genius,” Felix whispered to me, but it was loud enough for our brother to overhear. 

“You like him too,” Minho protested.

“Felix met him?”

“Last week,” Felix beamed. “Minho and I ran into him on the way to get coffee. Your lazy ass was still asleep at 12:00.”

“Shut up,” I grumbled. “I stayed up late to finish an essay.”

“College will kick your ass, Y/N,” Minho said. “If you can’t survive high school literature...”

“I get it,” I groaned. “I don’t want another lecture.”

“Good, but you’re still coming to the party because I want you to meet Chan and hear your brother’s masterpiece.”

“Please stop calling your mixtape a masterpiece.”

“I’ll consider it,” Minho smirked, “as long as I see you at Chan’s house this Friday.”

“This is considered blackmail, Minho,” I sighed. “But fine, I’ll need the time and address, please.”

I stood on the porch in the frigid cold wearing a party dress that might’ve been overkill, and I had a desire to return to my house because nobody was answering the door. Actually, when I really thought about it, this complex was too nice for a college student, unless Chan had discovered Blackbeard’s treasure or something. I snorted at my own joke, waiting impatiently for someone to let me inside because my brothers weren’t responding to my text messages. 

The music sounded faint from behind the door, which made me wonder if Minho had given me the wrong address. It wouldn’t be the first time that my brother gave me some kind of misinformation, but I thought he really wanted me to come tonight and hear his music. “Hello!” I yelled, banging my fist against the door. “Minho? I’m leaving in exactly ten seconds if nobody lets me inside!”

I started the countdown in my head, jumping up and down to warm my muscles, when a sudden expulsion of heat relieved the tension slowly numbing my fingers. “There you are,” Felix said with a drunken smile.

“Isn’t too early for you to be plastered?”

Felix giggled. “They’re playing Minho’s music next.”

“Well, let me inside you asshole,” I said, pushing my way into the house because my brother had clearly forgotten that it was basically snowing outside.

“What do you think?” Felix asked. “It’s pretty nice.”

“I can’t see anything,” I complained, narrowing my eyes since it was difficult to notice the details when the house was packed wall to wall with intoxicated college students. The lights were also dimmed, which meant that walking was an unnecessary chore as Felix took my hand and brought me into the kitchen where he promised Minho was waiting.

At least he wasn’t fully incapable. 

“Y/N,” Minho grinned, tossing an arm around my shoulder as he pulled me closer, allowing me to smell the nasty liquor on his breath.

“Drunk at your mixtape reveal party?”

Minho laughed. “I haven’t had much.”

“Felix has,” I said, grimacing when I spotted my younger brother bouncing from person to person with an unmaintainable energy.

“Let him have fun,” Minho said. “I’m keeping an eye on him.”

“Whatever, but he’s your responsibility in the morning when he’s suffering from a hangover.”

“I’ll handle it,” Minho reassured me. “Anyway, there’s someone I want you to meet.”

“Oh?”

“Chan! Get your ass over here!”

“What a good friend you are,” I remarked, and I was fully prepared to tease my brother further until I realized that Minho was waving down one of the most attractive men I had ever seen.

Chan was absolutely gorgeous, appearing nothing short of debauched under the low-hanging lights of the kitchen. Neatly styled blonde-hair parted down the middle, and bright blue eyes that held the stars inside an endless sea of black. “Are you guys having fun?” he asked with an accent that I couldn’t place.

“The place is fucking awesome, man,” Minho said, wrapping an arm around Chan’s shoulders as he nodded in my direction. “This is my sister,” Minho said with a proud smile. 

“Hello,” I said, cringing at my tone.

“Y/N,” Chan smiled, and I decided that nobody could ever say my name again with such a sexy tenor.

“You have a lovely home,” I said, swallowing hard when Chan leaned in closer. 

“Minho talks about you a lot,” Chan said with a smirk. “Do you want something to drink?”

I nodded without thinking, keeping my eyes trained on his beautiful visage as a beer slipped into my hand. “Pace yourself,” Minho warned me, but I ignored him as I swallowed down the bile-tasting liquid.

“I like her,” Chan nodded, looking at me seductively from over the top of his bottle.

“She’s a bit uptight,” Minho chuckled, and I glared at him because this was not the time to embarrass me. “Are my songs playing next?”

“I’ll make sure everything is ready,” Chan said, giving me one last lingering look.

“Let’s find a good place to hear everything,” Minho suggested, and I followed my brother with thoughts and fantasies consumed by Bang Chan.

Minho’s mixtape was really good, and I begrudgingly congratulated my brother and even allowed him to tell everyone that it was, in fact, a masterpiece. However, while my brother was distracted by a group of younger fan-girls, I slipped away to try and find somewhere peaceful to recover from my headache. It had developed sometime between the pounding bass line of “BEWARE” and the aggressive tone of “Boxer.” 

I paused next to the foyer where there were considerably less people. In fact, only one student lingered next to the open window, and I leaned against the wall as I closed my eyes against the distinct ringing in my ears. Next time, I would wear earplugs when Minho forced me to stand at the speakers.

“You’re not going to pass out, right?”

I blinked several times as the room swam into focus. “I’ll probably make it.”

“There’s a bathroom upstairs,” the rough voice continued, and I finally addressed the hooded figure standing at the window. I realized that he was smoking, holding the bud of the cigarette outside so that the ashes collected somewhere on the porch. “I’m Changbin,” he smirked. 

“Oh,” I cleared my throat. “Do you mind if I share the window?”

He shrugged, tossing his hood back so that I could see the way his black hair fell flat against his head. “Sure.”

I carefully felt my way along the wall until the generous cold breeze was hitting my flushed skin. “Thank god,” I groaned, practically forcing my head outside.

“Drink too much?”

“A combination of that and the music.”

“I heard a rumor that the beer was definitely spiked,” he said, dark eyes looking me over. “You’re obviously new here.”

“I’m with my brother,” I offered cautiously in response to his sudden advances.

“Do I know him?”

“Lee Minho.”

Changbin’s eyes widened. “We’re in the same music composition lecture. I thought he mentioned you in class.”

“He invited me,” I continued, but I didn’t understand why I felt the need to justify myself to him.

“I bet he did,” Changbin nodded. “Why would he hide you from us?”

I shivered. “I’m sure he’ll be back soon.”

“Is that right?” he asked before cornering me against the wall with a hungry gaze. “You hear the song playing?”

I nodded. “It’s loud.”

Changbin chuckled. “I made it.”

I nodded again because that certainly explained the explicit lyrics. “It’s...interesting?”

“Yeah?” Changbin purred. “Do you like it?”

“I do,” I gasped, feeling one of his hands grab me around the waist.

His lips brushed against mine, soft and sensual, while he inhaled deeply. “Y/N, is this your first party?”

“No,” I whispered because it suddenly felt like we were the only two people left in the room.

“I just assumed,” he said. “From the way you’re reacting.”

“W-what?”

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say that you wanted to go someplace else with me,” Changin said.

I was completely baffled by his assumption, searching for the right words, but they never came. However, the distinct sound of someone clearing their throat forced us apart, and I was surprised to see Chan standing so close. “I guess you’ve met Minho’s little sister,” Chan said and I hated how immature the introduction sounded. 

“She made sure to tell me,” Changbin smirked. “I can’t believe we haven’t met before.”

“He’s looking for her,” Chan continued, and I was confused by the hostility in his tone. “You probably shouldn’t do anything.”

“Wasn’t gonna,” Changbin retorted, planting one of his hands next to my head. “She’s feeling sick. Tell Minho I can take her home.”

“He won’t like that.”

“Oh? Is anyone else sober?”

Chan was quiet for a moment, eyes darting between the two of us. “Wait here.”

“What a good host,” Changbin snarked, but Chan was already walking away and I was starting to feel the effects of my alcoholic consumption darken the edges of my vision.

My brother was nothing short of incoherent, swaying back against Chan as he tried to give me a stern look. “Y/N, I hope you didn’t drink too much.”

“Really?” I snorted. “Isn’t that hypocritical?”

Of course, my admonishment had no effect on Minho. “Chan said that you were feeling sick.”

“It’s just a headache,” I said, although my churning stomach seemed to suggest otherwise.

“I thought I could take Y/N home,” Changbin interrupted. “I guess she could use some fresher air.”

“Sure,” Minho nodded, eyes glassy. “I don’t mind.”

Minho was readily willing to entrust his sister into the care of someone she had just met, and that’s when I knew that he couldn’t be trusted to take me anywhere. “Is that what you want?” Chan asked.

I shrugged because it might be nice to finally escape the endless drumming of Chan’s intricate sound system. “I might be saving myself some trouble.”

“I need more cigarettes,” Changbin said. “I’m running low and I know there’s a store near Minho’s house.

I frowned, but figured that Minho had brought Changbin over to our house before during that brief phase at the start of his college semester when I saw a new face in the basement every week. “I think that’s a good idea.”

“As long as you behave,” Chan warned him quietly, but I never had the opportunity to question him before Changbin was forcing us both outside onto the main porch where the snow was starting to build along the sidewalks.

“This way,” Changbin said, resting one of his hands against my lower back as he guided us down the street.

Changbin’s car was a very old model and the paint was starting to peel from the doors. He helped me inside slowly, reaching for my seat-belt before I slapped his hands out of the way because I could manage to do that by myself. He chuckled at my glare. “Comfortable?”

I nodded in response and waited for him to turn on the ignition before I was savoring the accompanying blast of heat even though it smelled distinctly of ashes. “Minho’s little sister,” Changbin said, eyes focused on the road in front of him. “Are you feeling better?”

“Yeah,” I replied because the growing distance between us and Chan’s party music was actually nice. “I guess the music gave me a headache.”

“That’s how Chan likes it,” Changbin said. “He’s gotten at least a dozen noise complaints from this past month alone.”

“How many parties does he have!”

Changbin smirked. “He likes to keep his house full.”

“It might’ve been too much tonight,” I said, leaning my head against the cold window. “I’ve never seen so many people.”

“Exams,” Changbin said. “When college students feel stressed, they like to get shitfaced.”

“But you’re not drunk.”

“Who said that I was stressed?”

His tone was strangely flirtatious, especially when he looked at me. “You didn’t have to help me, you know?”

“I know, but it was my window we were sharing,” Changbin said. “You looked like you were seconds away from crashing.”

“I can take care of myself,” I replied, even though it was rather harsh to criticize someone who was currently neglecting the speed limit to take my home as quickly as possible. “When did you meet Minho?”

“A few weeks ago,” Changbin said. “We worked on a project together.”

“I guess you’ve already been to my house.”

“Yeah, but I sure as hell don’t remember seeing you.”

“I don’t really like to socialize with most of my brother’s friends.” 

“Well, that explains a lot,” Changbin said, briefly glancing at me. “Are you that type? The unattainable girl next door?”

“I just don’t like people,” I grumbled, but Changbin seemed to think it was funny, laughing at my expense while reaching down to turn on the radio despite the fact that music had caused my headache in the first place.

Of course, I didn’t want to be that type, so I endured his self-promotion, listening to his gravelly voice suspend the entire car into some kind of hip-hip haven. He talked his way through the introductions of every song on his mixtapes, bragging about his compositions and arrangements. “It’s all about authenticity,” he explained when we finally pulled into my driveway.

“Is that so?” I sighed, frowning when I realized Felix had forgotten to turn on the front porch light.

“I guess I should wait until you’re inside,” Changbin chuckled.

“Thanks,” I said, reaching out for the door handle.

“Woah! Baby, where are you going?” Changbin asked, and I quickly returned my hands to my lap. “Are you trying to get away from me?”

“No,” I shook my head, breathing heavily when he reached for my thigh.

“You probably don’t hear this a lot,” Changbin continued. “But you’re really sexy.”

I startled at his words. “Thank you?”

“I mean it, Y/N,” he continued, fingers inching along my thigh like it was free real estate. “Thank god you wanted to share my window.”

I shook my head rapidly when he turned off the ignition, navigating the waistband of his panties to drag his hand against my sensitive core. “What are you doing?” I whispered.

“I’m trying to make you feel good,” he said. “Do you want me to?”

I nodded this time, waiting with my fists balled against the leather seats while he penetrated the soft walls of my core, moving in and out slowly to help me adjust to his fingers. I tried to relax, dropping my shoulders and controlling the way I was panting in desperation for more of the addicting feeling he was creating in my lower abdomen. It all felt entirely scandalous, feeling the way his fingers dragged across my insides, curling against the most responsive parts and watching me with an intensity that I could barely tolerate. I was moaning for him, calling his name softly because he was starting to increase his movements, and I focused on the way his wrist reappeared from underneath my skirt before losing itself in a sea of denim fabric.

“It’s wet,” he remarked, and the sounds of his penetration were growing louder, intermingling with my rapid breaths and the dark tone of his voice. “I can feel it.”

I knew what he meant because my entire body was pulsing in time to the pace in which he played with me. It was like I was his personal experiment, testing how I reacted to certain touches, especially when he crooked his fingers and a moan would displace the temporary quiet. “Changbin,” I whined, reaching for his arm because everything was starting to feel overwhelming.

“I got you,” he said. “You’ve been so good for me, Y/N, I’m not gonna stop until you cum.”

I orgasmed at his filthy words, falling down from the place he sent me and into a deep headspace. He pulled his fingers back, holding them up so that I could clearly see the evidence of my release in the faint light from the street lamp outside. “You didn’t expect that,” Changbin said calmly, reaching for a tissue from the backseat while I tried to figure out what just happened. “I don’t really care who your brother is,” he continued, moving in close. “I think we should fuck next time.” 

“Changbin,” I said, “if Minho finds out-”

“Why are you always worried about him?”

“He’s my brother!”

“Oh? Well, in that case, since you want to be good for your older brother,” Changbin smirked. “I guess I’ll have to find a different way to see you again.”

The next morning, I took a shower because I could still feel traces of Changbin’s touches between my thighs. The water was hot, fogging up the mirrors and making it difficult to breathe. It was necessary because I could function better when I re-emerged with fresh clothes and a sudden hunger for those little chocolate muffins my mom bought at the store.

I walked downstairs, noticing Felix and Jisung both sitting at the counter while they talked over their breakfast. Felix noticed me first, watching as I grabbed a leftover pastry from the fridge before leaning back against the cabinets. “Did you have fun last night?” he asked.

I narrowed my eyes, but then I realized that his question was innocent because he definitely didn’t know about Changbin. “It was nice.”

“What are you doing today?”

“I don’t know,” I shrugged. “I haven’t made plans.”

“You can hang out with me and Jisung today,” Felix suggested. “We’re just going for coffee.”

Jisung met my gaze from over the table and he quickly looked away as if he wasn’t expecting the contact. “Yeah,” I nodded. “I could use some coffee.”

It wasn’t often that I accompanied Felix and Jisung when they decided to actually leave the house and my brother’s massive collection of video games. Felix was never the problem, but I could only endure so much of Jisung’s flirtations before I inevitably made another pointless vow to try and ignore him. It was an impossible promise to keep since Felix was practically glued to his hip, and I can’t remember the last time Jisung actually spent the night at his own home.

However, coffee was nice and the taste was bile so it sat heavy on my tongue and provided a good distraction, even if that meant listening to my brother and Felix talk about the party. “I met Chan,” Jisung said. “He was really cool.”

Felix nodded, eyeing his coffee with obvious distaste. “Minho seems to like him.”

“He introduced me to his partner, Changbin,” Jisung continued and I fidgeted nervously at the mention of his name. “Apparently, they do a lot of work together.”

“I’ve heard their stuff,” Felix said, finally pushing away his coffee cup in exchange for his orange juice. “I think they’re really talented.”

“It’s like you’re meeting real professionals,” Jisung gushed and I rolled my eyes. “I let them listen to one of my demos,” Jisung chuckled. “I think they want to work together.”

“Really?” Felix gasped. “That’s amazing!”

“I guess they need another partner,” I remarked, shivering when I thought about my encounter with Changbin from the previous evening.

“You can always come with me to the studio tomorrow,” Jisung said. “If you want.”

The idea of being alone with Jisung wasn’t exactly high on my list of priorities. “I don’t know...”

“Changbin will be there too,” Jisung added. “Minho said he really thought you were cool at the party.”

“I bet he did,” I grumbled.

“Why are you inviting her instead of your best friend?” Felix pouted.

“You said you needed to work on a project,” Jisung reminded him. “Actually, you made me swear to keep away distractions!”

“Alright, fine,” Felix sighed. “You’re right, but that doesn’t mean that I’m okay with it.”

Jisung ignored my brother’s sullen expression. “Y/N? Do you want to come?”

“I guess,” I said, and I had no idea what possessed me to agree with his request until it was too late.

The next morning, I met Jisung outside of the address he had sent to my phone with several rather inappropriate emojis. I made sure to scold him for the messages, but he was far too excited, ignoring my complaints when he started talking about the new project he was working on with Chan and Changbin. “Come on,” he said, holding open the door as I walked inside the tiny lobby of the simple two-story building. “We’re on the top floor,” Jisung smirked as if that was something to brag about considering the condition of the worn-down warehouse they were using as a studio.

However, I knew that he was excited, so I feigned a smile as he continued talking about the building’s intricate history while we walked up the staircase to pause outside of a studio room. “Is this it?” I asked.

He nodded, reaching for the door handle. “They should be inside.”

True to his word, Chan and Changbin were standing together in front of a large computer monitor, turning around when they heard me and Jisung enter the room together. “There you are,” Chan said, but his gaze was strangely focused on me.

“We have some stuff for you to hear,” Changbin said, stretching his arms above his head. “I need some coffee first.”

“There’s a gas station down the road,” Jisung said. “I’ll go with you?”

Changbin looked at me for a moment before agreeing to Jisung’s proposal. “We’ll have plenty of time to work when we get back.”

“You’re in for a surprise, Jisung,” Chan said. “Actually, while the two of you are gone, maybe Y/N could look at some of the tracks?”

“Really?” I asked, surprised that he would be so willing to share, but he was already dragging me down into the desk chair, pulling me closer to the monitor.

“You can take you time and browse,” he said, joining Jisung and Changbin at the door.

They started talking about something else, but I was too busy admiring the vast number of tracks listened in sequential order on Chan’s computer. Despite how I might feel about Changbin, it was impossible to deny that their work was impressive, spreading across years of effort. It felt like I was being allowed an intimate glimpse of the artists who were growing more popular everyday.

“Try to be back in twenty minutes,” Chan said, and I watched Jisung and Changbin leave together, whispering in low tones while Chan shut the door behind them. “Your music is really good,” I said, scrolling through the library of his songs. It only made him that much more appealing when I could see the evidence of his passion.

“Are we going to stop playing games, Y/N?”

I frowned at his question, turning around in the chair. “What do you mean?”

Chan smirked, and I realized that it wasn’t playful. “Do you have any idea how fucking gorgeous you are?” he asked.

“Chan...” I trailed off, frozen in place while he slowly leered in my direction, taking several, meaningful steps before he was bracing himself on either side of the desk behind me. 

“Changbin told me about what happened in the car.”

I swallowed hard. “W-what?”

“Is that all it takes? A couple of fingers to satisfy you?”

“Chan, I don’t understand,” I tried, gasping when he picked me up out of the chair, legs wrapping around his waist automatically before he sat me down on the desk.

“Do you want it again?” Chan asked, running his hands alongside my waist before crawling his finger across the bare skin of my thighs, disregarding the thin barrier of my skirt. I felt him press the palm of his hand against my wet heat, fingers testing the edges of my panties. “I can make you feel good.”

The sensation was too much, and I found myself nodding without really thinking about the consequences. “Please.”

His fingers were suddenly penetrating my delicate walls, sliding in and out at a vicious pace that left me aching for something more. “Tell me, Y/N,” Chan demanded, using his thumb to circle my throbbing clitoris. “How does it feel?”

“I want it, Chan,” I moaned, bracing my hands against his firm chest as he continued to pleasure me. Unlike Changbin, I could tell that Chan was determined to make me cum as soon as possible, twisting his hand and jamming his fingers like he was aiming to make me lose my mind. I practically fell against him crying, riding out the waves of my high, while he ignored my whimpers when everything was suddenly feeling overstimulated.

“Come here,” he said, pulling out his fingers before falling against his chair and patting his thighs.

My legs were shaking when Chan helped me onto his lap and I moaned when his fingers crooked against my walls again. “Do you want my cock?” he asked and I nodded viciously, sending strands of my hair flying in all directions. “What a good girl,” he snarled, ripping his fingers away and leaving me whining around the empty space he left behind.

“Chan,” I groaned, resting my head against his shoulder while I watched him make a show out of undoing the belt around his waist, unzipping his skinny jeans before shoving the material down his thighs. His erection strained the silky material of his boxer shorts, and I was practically salivating.

He reached down to rub himself through his shorts, outlining his cock in a way that made me realize that I wasn’t going to leave this studio without an obvious limp. “Y/N,” he said. “Take off your skirt for me.”

I whined, but obeyed him instantly, bracing one hand against his shoulder while the other practically ripped the fine material of the pretty skirt down my legs and into the studio floor. Chan’s eyes darkened, grabbing my waist between his hands to grind the front of my soaked panties against his erection. “Please,” I cried, wanting nothing more than to take matters into my own hands, but Chan’s grip was impossible to break.

“I’m going to fuck this little pussy,” Chan growled. “Can you last long enough for me to come inside?”

“Yes,” I whined, stuttering around a broken sob when he pulled his cock into the studio light, stretching my panties to the side before sinking deep inside my pulsing heat.

“That’s right,” Chan said, eyes closed. “You feel so good.”

“Chan,” I moaned, eye widening when the stretch felt impossible, like he was splitting me open even when common sense told me that it was just my body accommodating to his cock.

His hips slammed into mine, and I could barely reciprocate when he easily overpowered my attempts to meet him somewhere between our bodies. Instead, he took control and I let him have it because he knew exactly what to do before sending me over the edge again, ignoring my cries when he continued to chase his own high, grunting against my ear when he came inside.

“Y/N,” he sighed, keeping me in place despite the fact that his cock was completely flaccid. “Such a good girl.”

I was incoherent and incapable of offering a response in return. Instead, I buried my face into the side of his neck, smelling the scent of his cologne mixed with sweat and the sex polluting the air around us. His body was firm and warm, and I closed my eyes because everything felt like an incredibly lucid dream.

I was still exhausted from the previous afternoon, unable to walk much further than from my bedroom to the living room before the painful reminder of my unexpected session with Chan started to ache between my legs. There was a movie playing on the television, but I was only somewhat focused on the lazy plot and characters. Instead, I was thinking about my interactions with Chan and Changbin, wondering if the two men were playing some sort of mind game with me.

I only managed to tear myself away from those thoughts when I saw Minho as he walked down the stairs with Felix and Jisung talking about something to do with a sports competition. “There you are!” Felix exclaimed. “We were just talking about your visit to the studio with Jisung.”

“I heard you got a tour,” Minho said. “That was nice of them.”

“Yeah,” I agree because there was a lot more to talk about besides the tour of the dilapidated studio.

“I haven’t had a chance to visit,” Minho said. “But they said I could record my new demo there.”

“Another one!” Felix gasped, looking at my brother with wide eyes. “You’re a fucking genius, man.”

“Oh, I know,” Minho smirked. “Actually, I can show you before my first lecture,” Minho said, starting in the direction of his bedroom.

Jisung watched Felix trail behind Minho before he joined me on the couch. “What did you think of the studio?”

I swallowed hard. “It was fine.”

“I think it’s really nice,” Jisung said. “Chan said something making us a permanent trio! He even gave us a name and everything!”

“Oh?”

“3racha,” Jisung giggled. “It’s like a pun-”

“Yeah, I get it,” I sighed impatiently. “I’m trying to watch the movie.”

Jisung was undeterred by the sharp comment, and he buried himself further into the cushions before turning his attention back to the screen.

“Our first show is tomorrow, Y/N,” Jisung giggled, and I finally turned to look at him. “I hope you can watch?”

“Where?”

“It’s a club somewhere downtown. I can send you the address? I know that Chan and Changbin were both insisting that you come.”

“I’m sure they were,” I grumbled, but Jisung was more interested in talking about his contributions to the album. 

“It would mean a lot to me,” he managed after thoroughly explaining their newest concept. “You don’t even have to stay for the whole show.”

“I don’t know...”

“Minho and Felix are coming!” he quickly added, and I wondered if he knew that I would feel more comfortable with my brothers around.

“Okay,” I finally relented, groaning when he started jumping up and down on the couch like an overzealous puppy.

I rode to the club with Minho and Felix who were excitedly chattering about the impending concert while I looked out the window despondently. It felt like a huge risk to show up to the concert considering the recent events concerning my meetings with Chan and Changbin. However, I didn’t want my brothers to be suspicious, so I reluctantly followed them inside where we squeezed together around one of the tables in the middle of an enormous crowd.

The atmosphere was euphoric, draped in a haze of alcohol and the flashing neon lights decorating the stage. It was actually quite civil considering the fact that we were moments away from listening to loud music full of pounding bass and fast rapping. I was half-way convinced that the other guests had no idea what they were actually getting themselves into by coming here tonight.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” an annoucement blared overheard, “please welcome, 3racha!”

The audience started clapping while a familiar melody began softly playing, and the fans around me started to cheer for the three shadowy figures who had suddenly walked onto the stage. “Let’s go!” Chan shouted, beginning his verse of the song which I now recognized as one of the tracks they had played for me at the studio. They were all wearing black, matching the tone and vibe of their music, playing through each track with an infectious energy. However, I was still unnerved because I noticed that they all managed to look at me at some point, even though the crowd, and I was starting to feel hot all over my entire body.

“They’re really good,” Felix remarked, and I nodded in return even though I was finding the table much more interesting.

“Thank you, 3racha!” an overhead announcement said and the audience were rising to their feet in synchrony to offer the artists a round of applause for their stage.

“Jisung sounded amazing!” Felix said as if he couldn’t resist the opportunity to brag about his friend.

“Maybe we can meet them backstage,” Minho suggested, and I halfheartedly protested when my brothers forced me to accompany them.

Subsequently, Minho forced Felix and I to wait by the stage for his friends because he was convinced that I really didn’t have an important project to complete before tomorrow. “You never do anything last minute, Y/N,” he said, smiling when he spotted Chan’s messy hair from the middle of the crowd.

“Hey!” Chan greeted him, accepting Minho’s failed attempt at a cool handshake. Changbin and Jisung followed him, and I couldn’t help but notice how the youngest had started to stumble on his feet. 

“You guys did great,” Minho said, talking extensively about his favorite performance while a sudden bombardment of alcohol hit my senses.

I instantly recoiled, covering my nose when the smell grew stronger. “How much did you drink, Jisung?”

“Not much,” the younger boy slurred, and I noticed that his eyes were distant.

“I’ll grab us more drinks,” Changbin said, giving me a familiar dark look before disappearing into the surrounding crowd.

“He’ll be fine,” Felix said, tossing an arm around Jisung’s shoulder. “You deserve to celebrate tonight, man!”

I tugged on Minho’s sleeve to catch his attention, unwittingly drawing Chan’s gaze at the same time. “I think he’s drunk.”

Minho sighed, ready to launch into one of his world-famous lectures, when he was interrupted by the DJ onstage who confronted Chan. “Hey! We couldn’t find you after the show.”

Chan rolled his eyes. “I was out here the entire time.”

“Well, you need to pick up your CD backstage,” the DJ said. “The owners will throw it out tomorrow.”

“I’ll be right there,” Chan grumbled while glaring at the DJ.

“Now,” the man growled and Chan quietly excused himself with a brittle tone. Meanwhile, I had to help Felix with Jisung because his friend was starting to sway dangerously back and forth.

“He needs to go home,” I sighed, watching as Jisung leaned more of his weight against a much smaller Felix.

“I’d take him, but I already had two beers,” Minho said, looking at Felix expectantly.

“Me!” Felix whined. “But I want to stay.”

“He’s your friend,” I glowered.

“Alright,” Minho groaned. “Y/N, you haven’t had anything to drink and you’re way more responsible than Felix.”

It was easy to meet Minho’s stern gaze since this was the perfect opportunity to finally leave the club. “Fine, I’ll take Jisung home.”

“Then it’s settled,” he agreed, tossing me his spare set of car keys. “Take him to our place.”

“Okay,” I said, groaning when Felix helped Jisung wrap his arms around my shoulders and waist. The additional weight was burdensome, and I cursed Jisung under my breath as I helped him through the club to where the bouncer waited at the exit. “I’ll never let you forget this,” I hissed, waiting for the bouncer to open the door while I took one last look over my shoulder to check on my brothers. Instead, I found myself looking directly into Changbin’s dark eyes as he waited by the bar, a familiar smirk making him appear even more dangerous. I shivered in response before I slowly shuffled to the car with Jisung practically breathing down my neck.

When I finally managed to accompany Jisung inside my house, I unceremoniously deposited him on the couch, ignoring the way he groaned in complaint. “I’ll find you some medicine,” I said, searching through one of the side tables.

“It hurts,” Jisung whined, and I rolled my eyes after shoving a bottle of Aspirin in his direction.

“Remember that when you decide to be stupid again.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, dropping two pills into his hand before swallowing them eagerly.

I grimaced as I sat down next to him. “When did you start drinking?”

“Before the show,” Jisung said. “Changbin said it would help take the edge off.”

“Yeah? Do me a favor and don’t listen to him anymore,” I said, frowning when Jisung curled closer to my side. “What are you doing?”

“Tired,” he said, looking up at me with a smile. “You look beautiful.”

I scoffed, trying to push him away, but alcohol apparently made him bolder because he was suddenly twisting one leg around my hip to hold himself in place. “Jisung, you need to stop,” I said, gasping when he brought his lips against mine, kissing me with skill and a surprising amount of tongue. “We can’t do this!”

“Please,” Jisung whined, grinding his hips against my legs. “Just one night, Y/N?”

“Your drunk,” I said, which was only one of a dozen problems with the scenarios currently playing out right in front of my very eyes.

“I’m sober,” Jisung promised, frantically chasing my lips with eager kisses.

It was nothing short of desire, the way he was looking at me, while I watched our clothes end up in a pile around the couch as Jisung fumbled with the condom before I helped him roll it onto his erection. He groaned at the contact, and I moved my hand up and down his cock a few more times before directing him between my legs. Jisung slid inside with a messy exhale, and his arms trembled as they supported his body looming over mine with his delicate frame.

It was a pleasant contradiction because Chan’s thrusts had been nothing short of confident while Jisung’s inexperience showed in the frantic way his hips stuttered against mine. He tried to move faster, losing his previous rhythm, and his cock fell all the way out, erection sliding between my thighs instead. He whined pathetically, rutting against my legs for several moments before he re-adjusted himself deep inside. “Y/N,” he moaned.

“It’s okay,” I told him, petting my fingers along the crown of his head. “You’re doing so good.”

“I like you so much,” Jisung replied earnestly and my heart ached at his words.

He looked unbelievably sinful, eclipsing my body against his as I felt the fabric of the couch against my skin. The friction was delicious, and I focused on the way his cock felt, thrusts growing more and more assured as he finally found a way to please us both, thumb brushing across my clitoris. He was still kissing me, tongue moving across mine deliberately, and I was breathing harshly as I fought to control the rising heat building in my abdomen. It was an intense build-up to an orgasm that I could’ve never anticipated since Jisung was always Felix’s friend who I usually avoided. The same Jisung whose endless flirtations usually annoyed me, but something had changed the moment I looked into his eyes and saw the lust and desire coming together to create an intoxicating mixture.

It was suddenly impossible to ignore the way he made me feel and I felt him come deep inside with a stuttered moan. His hips moved harshly against mine, and I chased my release with a sensual grind of my hips until I was throwing my head back with a cry, groaning when his lips found the sensitive skin of my neck. “Jisung,” I murmured, watching him through a haze of darkness as he rolled over next to me with a moan.

I studied the way Jisung’s hair fanned out across the cushions, making him look angelic beneath the influence of the moon’s light breaking the barrier of the  curtains. It made me feel guilty, realizing that I had finally returned Jisung’s feelings only after my tumultuous affairs with Changbin and Chan. In fact, I was nothing more than the very girls I often mocked when they threw themselves at the most popular boys in school. I swallowed hard at the realization. “What have I done?”

[skullsandwineglasses]

The Legends (2019) Full Review

My review of the first 30 episodes of the drama can be found here. 

This is more of a rant than a review. The drama should have wrapped up at episode 35. I was able to tolerate it up to episode 42 when the wedding was, but by episode 48 it’s a total mess. 

If only this scene was as epic as the picture makes it look. But alas, this was just a dream sequence, and by this point in the finale, I was already bored and scrolling through instagram on my phone. If only they really did have a love-hate relationship. But this is an angst-free drama. 

Inconsistent character arcs

The FL and ML have become incredibly weak, both in terms of abilities and personality. The changes just don’t make sense for their characters. 

Zhao yao is no longer the badass she once was, and I’m actually fine with that. Moving away from her demoness persona is part of her growth. BUT, she no longer has a goal in the drama (except when she finds out that Mo Qing has an inner demon. Then, her goal becomes finding a way to expel the demon). But in the last quarter of the drama, she doesn’t really do anything of importance. She lost her sword, but she doesn’t actively go and find it. Instead, Mo Qing and Jiang Wu are the ones who took initiative to hunt it down for her. And when Lin Zi Yu got away with it, she doesn’t bother thinking about finding her sword again?? I mean girl, you lost your sword. Your only weapon. Why is that not at the top of your list of priorities? Is this the same FL who had risked it all for the Wan Jun sword? 

(I miss the demoness)

Her tolerance level for things that annoy her is just so out of character. Zhao yao used to be someone who always fought back against anything she didn’t like. But when it comes to Jiang Wu, she seems to have unlimited tolerance for him. Yes, he saved her, but owing him does not mean letting him be a menace. Like when Jiang Wu sucked the life energy out of Ah Dai. All she did was try to restrain Mo Qing from attacking Jiang Wu, but she didn’t spring forward to prevent Jiang Wu from killing Ah Dai. I mean, the cause of Mo Qing’s rage was Ah Dai dying. Shouldn’t you go address the root of the problem? Instead, she just sits and stares and lets Jiang Wu kill Ah Dai instead of doing something. And then there’s the scene in the library when she’s asleep, but Mo Qing is wrestling with his inner demon, and then the Wan Jun sword kills the 2 guards on duty. She just sleeps through the entire thing. Wasn’t she once the most feared conqueror/demoness? Isn’t she a warrior? How can your senses not be alert when there’s so much ruckus around you? Someone on MDL said that she became a glorified baby sitter for the ML, and while I don’t agree that it’s as extreme as that, I can see their point. All that Zhao yao does after the wedding is try to reign in Mo Qing to prevent him from going into full-on demon mode. She holds him back, tries to calm him and soothe him, rinse and repeat.

Speaking of Mo Qing, his current personality is just rage and jealousy. At first, it was kinda endearing seeing him jealous, but soon his entire arc was just about him being consumed by jealousy. The writers try to justify it by saying that he’s always had low self-esteem and been unconfident about himself because of his upbringing, and the growing demon energy inside him is exacerbating these thoughts, making him more unlike himself, but you’re telling me that everything that he and Zhao yao had gone through together was all for naught? This would have made sense 5 years ago, but we’ve seen that he has greatly matured since becoming sect leader. During the earlier episodes, he was able to see right through Zhao yao’s mask. He teased her, flirted with her, scolded her, and basically proved he’s her equal in every way, and he did it all with easy confidence. And now suddenly, all of that growth reverses, and he’s insecure and sensitive again. This character progression just doesn’t make sense in the context of everything that’s happened. I would have loved to have seen more of the introverted and unconfident Mo Qing at the beginning of the drama. But instead, we only got a handful of scenes before that part of his character arc was cut short and we skip ahead 5 years later and then another 5 years later to when he’s the sect leader. There was honestly no purpose for Mo Qing’s suffering. He just suffered for the sake of suffering. In other xianxia dramas, characters suffered for a purpose. It was a price they had to pay in order to protect someone they love. But this suffering is just pointless. It does nothing for this character arc. And they kept replaying the same montage of him sleeping on the dragon. As if it’s not already clear from the last 20 episodes that he’s being haunted by his father’s demon. 

Villains and supporting characters

I didn’t really care for the villains? Luo Mingxuan is still alive, but doesn’t do anything until the last 5 episodes. I eyeroll whenever Lin Zi Yu is onscreen. Jiang Wu is the only one who’s interesting and he serves as comedic relief.  

And then there are all the unnecessary deaths. It’s like they’re killing off all the good characters one by one. What was the point of killing off the doctor? He was the only character who could scold both Zhao yao and Mo Qing. The drama felt so empty without him. 

But on a good note, I really liked most of the supporting characters, from Zhiyan to Shi Qi to Ah Rong to Gu Hanguang. They were also the most consistent characters in the drama. 

On a bad note, the drama spent too much time on the backstories of supporting characters. I did not care to watch Suruo mourn Luo Mingxuan and remembering how they fell in love, and this happens for pretty much all the couples in the drama. It’s because Zhao yao and Mo Qing have a very simple romantic arc that’s resolved very early on, so the writers had to throw in fillers to drag out the drama. And the consequence is that our leads end up getting not enough screen time. 

The final 2 episodes

Oh boy. The last 2 episodes were a hot mess. In the final battle, everyone kept attacking and stabbing Luo Mingxuan, but he just won’t die?? He’s like Wolverine. He just comes back stronger. It just kept dragging on and on, and I completely lost interest. And I felt bad for Xu Kai. He was standing on the sidelines for most of the battle, just watching and shooting worried faces at Zhao yao. I hate to say he was useless, but it just felt like the writers did him dirty. Even Jiany Wu, who had already died by that point, was given a brief re-appearance. While Mo Qing, the ML, was forced to sit out on the action. 

I’m also so over the will-he-won’t-he be evil plot. I keep saying this but I’ll say it again. It. Just. Keeps. Dragging. I’ve watching longer dramas, but this one felt to go on forever. We get it. You’re being tortured by your inner demon, but love will conquer all. 

The editing is also weird? Some of the scenes aren’t in chronological order, and there’s no separation between dream sequences and reality. I also never liked the preview at the beginning of each episode. I also hate how they cut some crucial scenes from the TV version that’s on youtube, forcing me to hop onto doboku, which buffers. 

Honestly, the last episode felt like a hallucinated dream sequence. In one scene, they’re all sitting around the table saying that the need to seal the Wan Jun sword before Mo Qing gets out of the control, and then it suddenly cuts to black with a title card that says 5 years later (don’t get me started on how often they overuse the “5 years later” plot device. Why is it always exactly 5 years?) We then see that Zhiyan is now the sect leader, and we’re told that Mo Qing has sealed himself away, and Zhao yao has been waiting for him to return. We don’t see them say goodbye to Mo Qing before he seals himself away. No scene showing a handover to Zhiyan. We’re just forced to go with it and imagine these scenes ourselves. 

Zhao yao, with a new hairstyle and new clothes to signify the time skip, watches Zhi yan and the sect from the distance. She then goes to visit other people, like Sima Rong and Liu Cangling. Liu Cangling and Zhiyan are the only couple who were able to move on from each other, and honestly, good for them. We then see Zhao yao sitting in the cave, pouring wine onto the cave floor, and then it cuts to black again and a sword flies through the air and wedges itself on the bedrock and we hear Mo Qing say Zhao yao’s name in a voiceover. And then it cuts to a scene where they’re both in the cave wearing their clothes from 5 years and Zhao yao has her old hairstyle. You assume this is a flashback to when they sealed the sword. And then we see Mo Qing in another realm where he lowers the sword in to the water, presumably sealing it. And then it cuts to both of them on the street buying food, wearing their old clothes and hairstyles. 

Does this mean he got out of the seal? When in the timeline is this street scene? How did he get out of the seal? Did he just walk out? Was Zhao yao there waiting for him, or did he go and find her? It’s typical for there to be a long period of uncertain separation in xianxia and wuxia dramas, and these dramas usually end either ambiguously where you don’t know if the couple will reunite, or they end with an emotional reunion, like in Ashes of Love, Eternal Love, Love and Destiny, and Love and Redemption, and famously in Return of the Condor Heroes. But what in the world was this ending?? The hell happened? That was so anticlimactic. If the scene on the street really was their “reunion” after he got out of the seal, does that mean Zhao yao changed her hair back to 5 years ago? Why is the costuming so confusing then?

And the last scene where they have the same actors play their kids? Um, no. That’s just plain weird. You built up the chemistry between the 2 actors, and then in the end you make them play siblings and re-enact the scene of when their parents met? For what? To make the audience reminisce about the budding romance between the leads at the beginning so that things come full circle? But, these characters are siblings?? You’re trying to make us emotional over a scene of two siblings pretending to be lovers?

There was just no point in doing that. It doesn’t tell us anything about the characters’ married life now. I don’t care about their kids. I care about the characters and what they’re doing now. What a strange and uncomfortable way to end the drama. Not satisfying at all. 

It would have been better if they had left it ambiguous. The amount of times that Zhao yao came back from the dead showed that they can defy the impossible, so even if it was an ambiguous ending, you’d still be able to believe that they’ll be together again. But this mess just ruined the chemistry. Ugh. I really miss the first half of the drama. 

Overall Impression

I’m mad about how chaotic the last few episodes were. While the beginning of the drama wasn’t without its flaws either, it was still very promising and intriguing. The beginning of the drama felt like they knew where they were going with the story, even if you didn’t completely like the direction that it went. So yes, I echo the other critiques saying that this drama had a strong beginning and a weak end. 

When I got to episode 35, I thought, how bad can this get? When I got to episode 42, I was still holding out hope that maybe other people were just harsh and maybe I’ll actually enjoy it. But no, the final 10 episodes are really as bad as everyone says it is. 

The romance, which was the only reason I stuck to the drama, also felt a little underdeveloped. I wish we got to see more scenes of them pre-episode 30.They were so cute then. Everything post-episode 30 was just them being constantly worried about each other. 

At least there was no angst. And the comedy was great. So there’s that. 

I give this drama a 7/10 for the characters and the premise. The plot is not worth watching due to terrible editing, pacing, and consistency, but it’s also a drama that won’t take you long to watch since you could skip most of it anyway and just go to the scenes with the leads. It’s my first drama watching Bai Lu and Xu Kai, but I’m def now interested in more of their work, like Arsenal Military Academy. 

[dream-a-little-bigger-x]

Change My Mind | Carrie Wilson

Request: Hey! Love ur writing! Could I request a JATP fic where the reader is Julie’s sister who can see the band too, and she’s in love with Carrie. Carrie loves her too but she pushed her away. And basically Julie and the boys trying to get them together.

Author’s note: This is my first Carrie fic I’ve written! And the first wlw au at that! Thanks for requesting this, I loved writing for Carrie! I hope you like this! 

Song(s) used: Change my Mind - One Direction

Pairing: Carrie Wilson x Fem!Reader

Warnings: none

Words: 4,250

“Hey sis, we’re gonna rehearse, wanna co--” Julie stops in her tracks on the threshold of her sister’s bedroom as the older sibling quickly drops her phone on her bed, startled at the sudden noise from her sister.  “What are you doing?” Julie asks, finding it a tad suspicious why her sister would just drop her phone like that. “Nothing!” Locking her phone, she scrambles off her bed and moves towards the door, “Just scrolling through Instagram, waiting for you to come and get me for band practice.” Julie shoots her a questionable look, but decides not to dig any deeper even though she knows her sister is lying to her. And she’s right. The truth is, Y/N was stalking Carrie Wilson’s Instagram profile. She’s had a crush on the blonde-haired girl since the very first time she saw her perform with Dirty Candi. It may have been the pink wig, or just the fact she looked incredibly confident on that stage with her girls, but it just did something to Y/N that ignited the flame in her heart. Sure, Y/N is a year older than Julie and Carrie, and those two used to be best friends when they were younger, but that doesn’t take her enormous crush away. Besides, it’s not like Carrie could ever like her back. She’s only Y/N Molina, Julie’s big sister with no talent whatsoever. Julie inherited all of their mother’s skills and talent. “‘Sup, guys!” Y/N throws up a peace sign as she enters the barn where Julie’s bandmates are waiting for the two Molina sisters to show up. Julie’s band are ghosts. Yep, you read that right. Ghosts. They showed up here when Julie played their demo and now, every time they sing with Julie everyone else can see them too. Julie and Y/N are the only ones who can see them all the time. It was kinda funny the first time Y/N saw them, actually.  They were about to eat dinner when Y/N found Julie in her mom’s studio, talking to three boys. “Uhm, Jules… What are these boys doing here?” Julie and the boys were very confused that she could see them too. But it made it so much easier for Julie since she could at least talk about them with someone. And ever since that first day, she’s been Julie and The Phantoms’ number one fan. The first few minutes of rehearsal, Y/N listens to every song and sings along softly with a couple of them, but by song number five, she’s back on her phone, scrolling through Carrie’s Instagram profile again. At first, it’s just a scrolling through her grid, but then she turns to the highlights of Carrie’s stories, starting with the one titled ‘Dirty Candi’. Giggling, she watches each and every single one of the funny behind the scenes bloopers from their rehearsals. As long as Carrie is certain they’re going to get these routines down and there’s no time pressure, she can actually be very chill and hilarious. Or that’s what Y/N has noticed whenever she sees them rehearsing in Los Feliz High’s gym. “Earth to Y/N,” Alex’s voice makes her snap up from her day dream about the it-girl. “Wh-what?” she stutters, unaware they were talking to her, but very aware she’s grinning like a fool. All four of them stare at the older Molina, all with teasing smirks on their faces. “What’cha looking at?” Reggie asks even though he already knows the answer. “Nothing,” she quickly utters whilst locking her phone as if that would make things less suspicious. “Just some funny TikToks,” she shrugs. Her four friends in front of her exchange knowing glances before placing their instruments on their stands or coming out from behind them to surround their very own Pinnocchio. “What were you really looking at, Y/N?” Luke asks, crossing his arms. “And don’t tell us another lame excuse, we know what you were really doing, Pinnocchio,” Julie adds, raising her eyebrows. Letting out an exasperated sigh, Y/N drops her phone next to her on the sofa and rubs her hands over her face. “We know how you feel about her, Angel,” Alex chimes in with that soft voice of his that could calm Y/N down in an instant. “You don���t have to lie to us.” Luke nods his head in agreement. “Yeah, Y/N. We just wanna help ya,” he says. Y/N hesitates, but then shakes her head anyway. “Just… Don’t,” she says and stands up from the couch before heading into the house again. The four bandmates are left dumbfounded and utterly confused. “Don’t what?” Reggie asks the others, “What can’t we do?” The three others simultaneously roll their eyes before getting back to their instruments. “Can’t we help Y/N? I mean, everyone knows she’s in love with Carrie, right?” he picks up his bass as the words roll off his lips. “Yeah, but if she doesn’t want our help, there’s not much we can do,” Alex replies with a shrug. “I know my sister like I know my own mind, she’ll want to figure it out by herself before getting others involved,” Julie adds while plopping down on the stool behind the keyboard. “So, we’re just gonna do nothing?” Reggie queries. The other exchange solemn glances. “Some friends you are,” he mumbles before plugging his bass into the amp. “Reggie’s right, guys,” Luke finally says. Reggie’s face lights up at his buddy’s words. There aren’t very many moments where Luke would agree with anything Reggie says. “We can’t just let her mope around the house and do nothing about her crush on Carrie, which by the way is totally mutual.” Julie’s eyebrows rise at the leadman’s words. “How’d you know that?” she asks. Luke lets out a huff as the corners of his lips turn up ever so slightly into the cheesiest smile as he shoots alarming glances at his buddies. “Luke  Patterson, how do you know that?” Julie’s voice sounds so stern and nearly angry, it scares Luke ever so slightly. “Uhm…” all three of them shriek out into that high-pitched tone of theirs they only use when they’ve said something they shouldn’t have. Alex sighs when he sees Julie’s face turn from angry to I-swear-I’d-kill-you-if-you-weren’t-already-dead. “We may have stalked Carrie a tiny bit when we found out about Y/N’s crush on her.” “Alex,” Luke snarls, but immediately calms down again upon seeing Julie’s glare directed to him. “But we actually found some pretty interesting things!” he continues as if that’s going to make it any better. “Yeah! We found her lying on her bed, scrolling through Y/N’s Instagram for a while before she started writing a song called ‘my love’,” Reggie carries on with the story. “Spoiler alert, she didn’t sing about a boy or ‘his eyes are so pretty’. Nope! It was actually about a girl!” “That could be about everyone, guys,” Julie rolls her eyes. The boys exchange another glance before bursting out into the snippet of the song they heard that day in Carrie’s bedroom. “I’d so be with you if it wasn’t for your sister, or the fact that you’d rather be with a mister!” Julie’s eyes widen at this. Girl code states you never date your brother, but in this heteronormative world, no one ever said anything about sisters. But that’s probably a given you wouldn’t date your best friend’s sister either, right? Plus, Carrie and Julie haven’t been friends for a while, that could be another reason why Carrie wouldn’t date Y/N. “You guys might be right,” Julie whispers as though she’s telling them a secret. “Let’s end rehearsals and think of a way to help them get together!” The four of them placed their instruments back in their places again or come out from behind them, and gather on the couch and armchairs to figure out a scheme to trick Y/N and Carrie into a date. It’s going to be difficult, but they’re all up for the task. They just want to see Y/N happy. 

About three days later, while at school, Y/N receives a text from Julie, telling her to meet the band in the music room during lunch. Confused as to why the band would be at Los Feliz High, Y/N drags her feet towards the classroom, only to find a picnic blanket with food scattered all around it in the middle of the floor. “Guys?” she calls out, hoping the boys would explain what’s going on. “Y/N?” a soft, melodic voice sounds from behind her. The girl immediately turns to find, in her opinion, the most beautiful girl that ever walked this earth. Her hair is curled to perfection, cascading down her right shoulder and framing her beautiful round-ish face. Her brown eyes are curiously and confusedly darting around the room before landing on Y/N’s face. Question marks are haunting the beautiful dark orbs Y/N had fallen in love with. “What’s going on?” “I-I…” Y/N doesn’t even know what to tell her. She barely knows what’s going on herself. Carrie holds a perfectly manicured finger up as a thought crosses her mind. “This isn’t what I think it is right?” Y/N opens her mouth to say something, but nothing other than weird sounds fall out. Making a great impression, Molina, she thinks to herself. “Y/N, we can’t. I can’t. Just… Don’t.” Carrie turns on her heels and leaves the music room along with the sadness and pain of a broken heart. She hears a whoosh behind her before she hears Alex’s voice say, “We’re so sorry, Y/N, we wanted to help…” As tears stream down Y/N's face, she forcefully turns around to face her friends. “I told you guys to just not do anything and you can’t even do that! Stop meddling in my life, for crying out loud! I never needed you here! I never asked you to do this! Just stay out of my life!” Her voice is shrill and cold. So cold, it even chills the three ghost boys. After sending them one last sharp glare, she turns on her heel and rushes out of the room. She doesn’t even realize she’d run past her sister and her best friend, even though the two call after her. The sobs wracking through her body deafen her whilst she blindly finds her way to the bathroom and into a stall where she collapses to the floor. “Hermanita?” Her sister’s voice calling out is the first thing she hears between all the sobs and sniffles. Julie, hearing this, starts pushing against all stall doors until one opens slightly before bumping into Y/N’s knees. The girl scoots over as far as she can to let her sister inside, deciding she needs her little JuJu right now. “I’m so sorry, Hermanita,” she whispers as she slides down to the floor too on the opposite side of the stall. Their knees touch, which feels weirdly comforting to Y/N.  “No, it’s okay…” she sniffles, “At least now I really know where I stand, you know?” Julie presses her lips together into a tight smile before sliding forward onto the dirty bathroom floor and wrapping her arms around her big sister in a kind of awkward hug. “You deserve so much better than Carrie Wilson, Y/N/N,” she whispers in the older Molina’s ear. “So much better and so much more.” More tears roll down Y/N’s cheeks upon hearing these words. “But all I want is her, JuJu,” she cries out. Hearing her sister break down like this breaks Julie’s entire heart in a thousand pieces. She was so wrong about trying to set her sister up with Carrie on this date, but there might just be another way to help her instead. All she’d need is the boys for moral support and a bit of alone time with Carrie. That should do it. 

That night, Julie takes the boys with her to go to the Wilson’s. To Julie’s surprise, Trevor opens the door with a surprised smile on his face upon seeing his daughter’s ex-best friend. That ex-best friend, however, tries to focus on the man in front of her instead of the tensing, nervous boys behind her. They still hadn’t been able to talk to Trevor about the whole song-stealing thing. “Hey, Trevor, is Carrie home?” Julie asks with the widest smile on her face to try and hide how nervous she really is. This is either going to ruin Y/N chances with Carrie completely or help them finally get together. She’s banking on the latter, trying to stay optimistic. “Uhm, yeah, she’s upstairs in her room. She hasn’t left since coming home from school,” Trevor explains as he steps aside to let the young girl inside. “Think I heard her crying too, so I’m kinda worried, but kinda scared to go in and ask. You know how she is.” Julie simply nods her head at the overexplaining man. “I’ll go and check up on her. I wanna talk to her about something anyways.” Trevor offers her a thankful smile before letting her go upstairs. Still being followed by the three ghost boys, Julie makes her way up to Carrie’s room. Memories from when she used to come here on play dates when they were younger flood in her brain. It’s a nostalgic, yet heartbreaking feeling. Upon arriving at Carrie’s bedroom, Julie raises her fist to knock on the door, but stops half-way there. “What’s she waiting for?” she hears Reggie whisper behind her. “You got this, Julie,” Luke encourages, and Alex chimes in too with the words she needs to hear at this very moment. “For Y/N.” Her fist knocks a soft, steady beat on the wooden door, and then the waiting game commences. Which doesn’t last too long. Twenty seconds max. Before that, there’s some rustling, some nose blowing noises, and then the door opens. Carrie’s face falters upon seeing Julie’s face, but Julie doesn’t care. All she cares about is the fact that Carrie’s eyes look red and puffy, as if she’d been crying all day. Trevor was right about hearing sobs. “What do you want?” she asks sharply, but her voice still wavers ever so slightly. “I wanna talk to you…” Julie says, and as Carrie opens her mouth to object, she follows with, “About Y/N.” The blonde girl’s eyes tear up upon hearing the name as it’s clearly the big trigger for her breakdown. Carrie opens her bedroom door a little further before turning and walking inside, leaving it open for Julie to follow. She and the boys walk inside, and while Julie stops in the middle of the room, the boys scatter around. Luke goes to sit on the edge at the foot of Carrie’s bed since she’s resting against the headboard, Alex takes a seat in the bright pink armchair and Reggie sits down on her desk, knocking Carrie’s pencil case off. The owner’s eyes widen upon seeing the pencil case drop without a cause while Julie just shoots Reggie a glare. He whispers a sorry while holding his hands up in defense. “What do you have to say?” Carrie then focuses back on the intruder in her house. “I …” She realizes she has no clue what she’s going to say or how she’s going to say it. “Carrie… I know you’re in love with my sister,” she then blurts out. Carrie perches up at this, eyes wide and filled with terror. “It’s fine, Carrie. It really is okay. I’m glad, even! She’s mad for you too, girl. And I kinda set up the whole picnic thing in the music room to force you two together, finally, but I guess that kinda backfired…” “Y/N’s in love with me?” she asks, and Julie nods. “I thought she hated me because I kinda dropped both of you when your mother died…” A twinge of pain shoots through Julie’s body at the memory of their fight. “I don’t get it either, but she does really love you.” Carrie chuckles light-heartedly at that, telling Julie it’s okay to do so, too. “Why did you run away from her at lunch?” she then asks, looking at Carrie who’s fidgeting with the hem of a cushion. “Because I’m scared,” she says after a few beats of silence. “Scared that if we date, people are gonna talk. Scared our fighting might put a wedge between our relationship. Scared my dad’s going to react weirdly.” Julie subtly glances at Alex. He’s giving her a reassuring look, telling her Trevor was really okay with him being gay. “It’s 2020, Carrie, I’m sure most people at our school would be jealous of whoever you date, whether it’s a guy, a gal, or a non-binary pal.” She carefully inches closer to the bed. “I heard your dad is pretty okay with the lgbtq community. My mom once told me he had a friend that was gay and he supported him and didn’t treat him any different.” She takes a deep breath before sitting down next to Luke. “And as regards to our fight, I’m willing to put that grudge aside if it means you’ll tell my sister the truth.” A twinkle in Carrie’s eyes tells Julie she likes the sound of that idea very much. “It’s been a year, Carrie. I’m pretty sick of us fighting anyway and I miss the fun times we had together,” Julie shrugs as she brings out the words carefully. Before she can even register it, Carrie has launched herself forward and taken Julie in her arms for a tight hug. Julie is surprised at first, but then wraps  her arms around her oldest friend too. The boys watch the scene with tender eyes, glad this is going so well. After a while, Carrie pulls back and holds Julie at arm's length. “Can we keep the rivalry for our shows though? I think it adds a little more showbizz to it,” she says, which makes Julie snicker, shaking her head in disbelief. “Okay, then can I ask you for another favor?” “What is it?” Julie asks, glancing at Luke quickly. He’s as intrigued as she is. “I don’t know what to say to Y/N that doesn’t make me look like a fool.” The Carrie Julie used to know back in the day is rearing its head again. It’s a soft, shy version of the one Los Feliz High knows. It’s the version Y/N fell in love with. “I have an idea.” 

For about a week, Carrie comes in on rehearsals to rehearse their surprise for Y/N, but of course, they have to hide it for the older Molina. They’d rehearse at Carrie’s place or in the garage whenever Y/N was with friends or at Carlos’ baseball games. Whenever she did walk in, Carrie would hide behind Alex’s drum kit, trying her hardest to withhold herself from jumping out and just confessing her love to the girl. This is the most perfect surprise and if she ruins it now, it’s going to take away the romantic flair of it all. On Friday, they’re finally ready to execute the plan. Julie sets up her keyboard outside in the garden underneath her sister’s bedroom window, along with a microphone for Carrie, plugged into the amp. The boys are ready to jump in too, instruments in hand, ready to go. “Ready?” Julie whispers to Carrie. The girl nods her head, but the fear in her eyes says something different. “You got this,” she utters the words Luke always tells her. “Okay, let’s go,” she whispers. Julie starts playing a couple of notes on her piano whilst Luke starts to strum his guitar, suddenly appearing to Carrie. The girl, now a little calmed down, inhales deeply before starting to sing, her soft melodic voice carrying through the night. “The end of the night We should say goodbye But we carry on While everyone's gone” Y/N’s lying on her bed, scrolling aimlessly through Instagram when she hears the voice of an angel in the night from outside her bedroom window. Thinking it’s Julie and the band rehearsing, she ignores it and continues scrolling. “Never felt like this before Are we friends or are we more As I'm walking towards the door I'm not sure” Alex and Reggie join in too, appearing next to Luke and Julie, and giving Carrie another boost of confidence. In the past week, these hologram boys have really given her a little more confidence for this surprise as she really didn’t think she could do this. “But baby if you say you want me to stay I'll change my mind 'Cause I don't wanna know I'm walking away If you'll be mine Won't go, won't go So baby if you say you want me to stay Stay for the night I'll change my mind” Y/N finally starts to realize that this isn’t Julie’s voice at all, and crawls off her bed, leaving her phone there. Carefully, but drawn in by the music, she moves to her window and opens it further to find Carrie along with the rest of the bend on the lawn. Upon seeing Y/N’s beautiful face, Carrie’s lips curl upwards, reaching her eyes. The other confidence boost she needed. “Lean in when you laugh We take photographs There's no music on But we dance along” Y/N sits down on her window sill, enthralled by the gorgeous voice serenading her from her backyard. She glances at the boys and Julie once, and each of them has the proudest, happiest smile on their faces. Happy they could help their friends finally get together. “Never felt like this before Are we friends or are we more As I'm walking towards the door I'm not sure” Then Y/N focuses back on Carrie and the words she’s singing, feeling each and every single one of them deep in her heart. It even makes her tear up a little. “But baby if you say you want me to stay I'll change my mind 'Cause I don't wanna know I'm walking away If you'll be mine Won't go, won't go So baby if you say you want me to stay Stay for the night I'll change my mind I'll change my mind” Carrie takes the mic off the stand and walks even closer towards the window, never breaking the intense eye contact the two are sharing. “Baby if you say you want me to stay I'll change my mind” Quickly wiping away the tears that have fallen, Y/N makes her way downstairs and into the yard as fast as she can, in time to hear them sing the last chorus. Carrie, having seen this, is waiting for her at the door and grabs her hand to lead her towards the rest of the band whilst still singing to her girl. “But baby if you say you want me to stay I'll change my mind 'Cause I don't wanna know I'm walking away If you'll be mine Won't go, won't go So baby if you say you want me to stay Stay for the night I'll change my mind” The boys stop playing, and to Carrie, they disappear, but Y/N can see they’re still there. It does make her relax a little, knowing she has their moral support. Carrie takes both her hands in hers, pulling her a little closer to her body as she inhales deeply. “That was beautiful, Care, I--” Carrie interrupts her by placing a finger on her lips. “Please, let me talk?” Y/N nods her head slowly as Carrie removes her finger and places her hand back in Y/N’s. “I’ve been so scared about what people at school would say behind my back or what my dad would say, but… I don’t care what they say, Y/N. I am so in love with you and I have been for a while now, but I was so scared to admit that even to myself. But I know now that it’s okay to love whoever you wanna love and I know that the people who love me will still love me and will realize that nothing has changed. I know now I wanna be with you, Y/N.” A smile plays at Y/N’s lips upon hearing those words. The words she wanted to hear for such a long time have now finally reached her ears and settled in her brain for her to think back on later. “I wanna be with you too, Carrie. You have no clue how long I’ve wanted to tell you that,” she chuckles, and Carrie lets out a giggle too. It’s Y/N’s favorite sound in the entire world. Carrie then lets go of Y/N’s hands and places hers on her cheeks instead, bringing the girl closer to press their lips together for their very first kiss. The firework-filled, long-awaited kiss that sends Julie’s ghost band into loud cheers. Y/N is too focused on the girl kissing her, she doesn’t even notice. Carrie is finally kissing her. The girl she’s been pining for is finally kissing her. They’re actually together. That’s something she’d never thought would happen, but now that it’s happened, it’s better than she could ever dream of. 

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[milky-pillow]

Song: Then (B.I) / DEMO.1 (131) Characters: Yamada Ichiro, Yamada Jiro, Yamada Saburo, Reader Relationship(s): Yamada Ichiro/Reader

originally posted on ao3 // song lyrics used: here

“I guess I must live on even though you aren’t by my side. Or was it me who wasn’t by your side first?”

You can’t remember the last time you truly smiled. The sunlight beams through the windows, hitting your face. Since you’ve parted with Ichiro, you have filled your life with distractions. Anything that can get your mind off of him worked. You roll off your bed and stretch, letting the sun warm your body. To block any sadness from entering your soul, you decide to go out to eat breakfast.

“A cafe… pancakes maybe? Ooo, and a cup of coffee or something,” you murmur to yourself, feeling your hunger grow by the minute.

Though it’s early, the streets of Ikebukuro are bustling with people. Most people seem to be going to work, their formal clothing making you stick out like a sore thumb.

Quickly ordering your food, you take a seat near a window-- your usual seat. People-watching is calming to you. Their lives seem to be so different from yours and it is the only thing that makes you feel unique. You like to guess what kind of jobs people were making their way towards as they pass. Judging their outfits and comparing it to your own is also another pastime.

“Here’s your order,” a worker comes by and places your drink and food on your table with a smile. Your stomach growls at your thought at finally eating.

You nod to them, “thank you.”

Leaving you be, you spend your time between scrolling your phone, eating, and observing people. Before you know it, an hour passed. Already having paid for your food, you bring your empty plate and glass by the counter and leave to continue your day.

“And I know my words must seem like excuses, but it was never my intention to hurt you.”

“Ichiro, I have my own life to live! Don’t you have your brothers to look out for?” you lashed at Ichiro.

His eyes seemed to flash with anger-- a look you’ve never seen before, “am I not allowed to care for you?”

A pang in your heart. Misunderstanding, yet you couldn’t get yourself to say anything. He could care, but you felt it was getting out of hand. Were you overthinking it? No way. You couldn’t be.

“I never said you couldn’t. Don’t twist my words,” you folded your arms with a huff, “plus, why do you care about me so much now? I thought you were too busy ‘preparing for rap battles’ or whatever. Sometimes it seems like you care more about that stupid hypnosis mic of yours than you care about me!”

“That’s not true Y/n, and you know it! If you had a problem with that, why did you just tell me?”

“You know that’s not what this is about. Don’t change the subject like that.”

You couldn’t believe you were arguing in his home. Not wanting his brothers to see, you made your way towards the door, hoping Ichiro would follow.

“Where are you going now? The bar? Someone else?” His questions made you stop all movement.

Tears filled your eyes as you dropped your head to the ground, “so that’s how you see me? Ichiro, I don’t want to argue here. We can’t have your brothers hearing this; they don’t deserve to hear this.”

As if someone flipped a switch, his tone softened, “look, Y/n… you know I didn’t mean it like that.”

“It definitely seemed like it though. You know what? Just leave me alone. I can’t handle this right now,” the cracking in your voice gave away your sadness. Ichiro took a step towards you, but you stopped him, “if you cared, you’d give me time. Time: that’s all I ask of you.”

Unable to look at him, you could only listen to his response, “okay, if that’s what you want. Just… know that I’ll be waiting for you.”

“Even if I never learn to love for the rest of my life, if we ever meet again for as long as I live, I promise to keep my loyalty then.”

Looking at your watch, you wait by the gate for Jiro. Compared to Saburo, Jiro sometimes has you tutor him. Every Wednesday is what you both agreed on. Since then, you dread Wednesdays. It means you have to go into their home. The same home that you and Ichiro argued in. You are lucky enough that Ichiro is usually out, but when he’s around you do your best to avoid talking to him at all costs.

“Did I make you wait long?” Jiro runs over to you, clearly out of breath.

You shake your head, “no. I just got here a few minutes ago, and waiting doesn’t hurt.”

Jiro makes small talk while you head over to his house, boasting about something amazing Ichiro has done earlier that week. While it tends to go in one ear and out the other, he says something interesting: “he doesn’t want me to tell you, but he saw you while you were shopping over the day. He told Saburo and I that he was too nervous to talk to you. Nervous! Brother Ichiro is never like that!”

You are taken aback by what Jiro said, “he was? He shouldn’t have to feel that way, that’s so unlike him.”

Jiro laughs, agreeing with your statement as you both enter his living room and get started on tutoring.

“How did you get that?” Jiro will ask every once in a while on a math problem. As usual, you’ll walk him through each step until he understands the concept.

Every once in a while Saburo will pop in to pick on his older brother, or you’ll take breaks for snacks, but for the most part, you were incredibly focused on helping Jiro.

“I woke up from a deep dream, but was never able to tell you that you were the reason I felt like I was living.”

The day after your dispute with Ichiro, you woke up in a cold sweat. Unable to recall anything that happened the previous night, you check your phone for the time.

12:45 pm. You overslept. You were lucky to not have any plans that day or you would’ve been screwed.

You sat up in disbelief when remembering your argument with Ichiro. “That really happened,” you told yourself. Part of you wanted to reach out to him, but you couldn’t get yourself to. While you remembered the hurtful words exchanged, you weren’t able to figure out what started the situation in the first place.

“He really thought I had another destination when leaving,” you feel your cheeks flare. Were you angry? Or maybe embarrassed? What made him think that in the first place?

You fall back onto your bed, covering your face with a pillow, tears slowly spreading and soiling your clean rectangular mold of fluff. What to do now? The person you deemed your other half seems to have turned into something else.

“Time?” you wept, “Is that really what I need?” Maybe reconciliation is what you needed, but you couldn’t dare to face him properly. If anything, you believed he needed to apologize and face the problem first. But how could he if he obeyed your wish for time apart? You didn’t dare think aloud, fearing that the worst would only come out of it.

It didn’t help that you would still have to see him every now and then. While twice or three times a week wasn’t harmful, you felt yourself becoming uneasy at the thought of seeing him. Either way, you had to get over it, there’s no avoiding it. You knew this, but you found it hard to accept it.

For the next hour, you reminded yourself of the happy memories the two of you had made together: the theme park visits, the cafe dates, the rap practices. Even the bittersweet memories of your winter walks and deep eye-opening discussions had you yearning for him.

It’s only been a day, it’s felt like a lifetime.

“I’m hoping this isn’t the end‒ I must see you soon.”

“I’m back!” Ichiro announces, entering the Ikebukuro home, unaware of your presence.

The two younger brothers run to the door to greet him while you sit in silence. Usually you’re able to fully avoid him, but there are times like this where he comes home earlier than expected.

“Ichiro! I got a one-hundred on my exam today!” Saburo beams to his eldest brother.

Jiro gets in front of Ichiro and excitedly announces, “I’m finally passing one of my classes thanks to Y/n!”

Pointing to you, his eyes immediately make their way to you. You avoid his gaze, sheepishly rubbing your neck.

“It’s nothing really,” you let out a nervous laugh, “Jiro just needed a push in the right direction is all.”

Ichiro makes his way over to you to eye you better, “thank you, Y/n. But have you been taking care of yourself? You look… tired. Have you been getting enough rest? You know you have to look after yourself.”

You look up at him, revealing your eye bags. He didn’t even have to see your face to recognize your exhaustion? A warm feeling spread through your body at the thought of him caring, but you didn’t let it get to your head.

“I- I do. It was just one of those nights where I didn’t get enough rest, I guess,” you lie with a tired smile. Sweat rolls down the side of your face and you’re unsure whether it’s from feeling unwell or from anxiousness.

“Y/n, are you sure?” Ichiro turns to his younger siblings, “Did you guys notice this?” They look at each other before shaking their heads.

“Look, Ichiro, I’m fine. I am taking care of myself. I even took a walk today!”

“Was that really it? Or was it because you picked up my brother from school?”

“No, really! I walked to that one cafe in the city that I go to all the time for breakfast today. Again, Ichiro, don’t worry about me.”

As much as you wanted to tell him to hop off you, you couldn’t get yourself to, so you let him continue to interrogate you and your well-being. Though, it wasn’t like you’d tell him the truth anyways.

“We left the memory of time losing its breath on the other side; But we brought back to reality the cherished memories we made so sadly, yet beautifully and now we must rewrite our story that we never wanted to bring to an end.”

There was a specific time that you recalled that day where you have never felt happier by Ichiro’s side. You two made a spontaneous trip to the seaside for the weekend. While you claimed it was to get away from the city, it was really to spend more time together. Luckily Jiro and Saburo were okay with being without Ichiro for those two days or you would’ve had to take them with you guys.

When you both arrived at the hotel, you raced each other to the hotel room. The winner got to decide what to do first and with so much to do, both of you wanted the upper hand on how to start the weekend that awaited the both of you.

Much to your surprise, you won with Ichiro being a few steps behind you. Letting out a victorious cheer, you open the door to the room you will be staying in. While you and Ichuro had organized your belongings, you decided to take a stroll by the beach first.

“The beach? Did you want to get a tan or build a sandcastle or something?” Ichiro laughed.

You shook your head, “not really, I just wanted to relax with a walk before we get into the heavy stuff, you know? Take it as a warm up for all the moving we’ll be doing later.” In all honesty, you just wanted to walk along the foreshore and mess around with him, but you didn’t want to sound like a kid. Building a sandcastle did pique your interest as his mentioning of it, so maybe you’ll consider it.

You took your bathing suit out from your suitcase along with some light clothing, going to the bathroom to change into them. When you came out, Ichiro had decided to change while waiting, wearing a different outfit than he was previously.

“Ready for the best trip ever?” Ichiro extended his hand for you to take. From the moment you took his hand till the end of the weekend, you had experienced such happiness that you knew you’d never get such an experience again.

“I dream a sad dream every night. I dance within the loss. Who will become my light? Will you ever extend your hand to me?”

“Y/n, you’re gonna stay for dinner, right?” Saburo gives you an innocent smile, but you know he’s doing it on purpose.

You hesitate, and before you can decline, Jiro pipes in, “take it as a thanks for all the tutoring!”

Reluctantly agreeing, you end up sitting with them to eat dinner. Jiro and Saburo brag to Ichiro about random things they did recently. All you do is listen and eat silently. The warmth of the food adds to the flavor of the food. You begin to list random ingredients that could be in the meal to busy yourself.

“So,” Saburo changes the subject, “how come you and Ichiro don’t hang out as much anymore?”

You look up at him in surprise, nearly choking on your food, “well, uh…”

“Saburo, don’t just ask questions like that,” Ichiro scolds him.

“No, it’s okay. I owe an explanation anyways,” you take another bite of the dinner before explaining, “I just needed some time alone. I thought it would help me to do something like that. I mean, I’ve seen loads of people do it and they come back a new and improved person, you know? Well, clearly that didn’t work out so well.”

The air seems to have thickened, but you laugh it off and wave your hands to dismiss your statement.

“Um, Y/n,” Ichiro whispers your name so his brothers don’t take notice, “could we talk after dinner?”

You nod, growing nervous. Because of that, you rush to eat your food before it gets to a point where you can’t eat anymore. The two younger brothers watch in both astonishment and confusion, but don’t ask any questions.

After dinner, Saburo and Jiro go back to their rooms to prepare for bed. With you and Ichiro sitting together, alone, Ichiro struggles to find where to start.

“How much longer do you plan on making yourself suffer?”

Out of anything he could have said, you weren’t expecting that.

“What? I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you shrug and attempt to play it off.

“I know you, Y/n. Why are you trying so hard to avoid me anyways? Was it because of that argument from before? That was months ago!”

“I- look. I didn’t want you babying me like you do with your brothers, okay? I’m not your sibling. I’m my own person. You pestered me so much about taking care of myself that I was overwhelmed I guess. I don’t even know. But after that night everything went downhill.”

“I didn’t know,” Ichiro looks down at his feet, “but was it really just that? It seemed like there was more bothering you that night.”

“Well,” you debate on whether or not to tell him, but decide it’s for the best that he knows, “you kind of assumed I was going to mess around when I was about to leave.”

“But I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Maybe you didn’t, but it sticks. Either way, I guess I was being too sensitive that night,” you cover your face with your hands in embarrassment, “I’m sorry Ichiro. I’m so sorry.”

“Y/n, it’s okay,” he pulls your hands away and looks into your eyes with a soft expression. He pulls you into a hug as you begin to cry, “I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have pestered you too much. I’ll be sure to not annoy you like that, but it just happens sometimes.”

You laugh, “that’s fine, as long as it’s not about every little thing I do. I forgive you.”

After the end of that conversation, you both decide to catch up on what happened over the past few months. The night ended up being full of laughter and happiness-- something you weren’t expecting to experience so soon.

END.