#as a nonbinary individual this warmed my heart

[jenyifer]

I’ve read 10 more books let’s get a rec list here for future use for people to look up on my page or alone.

Disclaimer:I think reviews and opinions show a lot about who you are and your life exp so. I am a woman lover who is 30 with ADHD. I am cisgendered she/her. I like listening to books on my drive in and out of work. I’ve read and watched a lot of scifi and fantasy and these books reflect that too.

In order of most loved:

1. Most Ardently by Gabe Cole Novoa 🏳️‍⚧���🏳️‍🌈⏳ Historical Romance. this beautifully crafted novel moved me to tears. Set in a historical, mundane world, it captures the essence of the original while offering a fresh perspective.

2. Some Desperate Glory by Emily Tesh 👯‍♀️🏳️‍🌈👽🚀now MC Romance very very low I like to think she’s a little bit some where in the ace spectrum but 🥹🥹 Avicenna gives you enough gay vibes trust me. It is a real journey. MC is broken out of her brainwashing and tries to save the Earth and Universe. It’s high Sci-fi fun. I really loved it.

3. The Last Binding Trilogy by Freya Marske 🏳️‍🌈👯‍♀️🏳️‍🌈🪄⏳🔎 Alright each book is from a different intertwined couple’s POV. Each book is very much historical wizard mystery’s found family. Each book has steamy interesting spicy scenes. I find this series more impressive now because I still think about the couples and its universe was fun. Side note the last couple is the best.

4. The Tithenai Chronicles by Foz Meadows 🏳️‍🌈⏳🪄🔎 it’s more historical than super magical but both books have decent mysteries. It’s about an arranged royal marriage one comes from a conservative country suffering from trauma which we get to see but is treated respectfully and not harped on and the other is a warrior who is a little neurospicy. So Velasin is so dear to me I forgive a lot because he’s baby and I love him. They have non binary characters and disabled characters in the story being treated like people. There is some very spicy scenes in these two books. The new character in the second book so amazing they reminds me of Tennal from Oceans Echo in spirit anyway. I liked them. But his spicy scenes had me blushing for days. A con of this book is it’s very emotional so depression trauma warnings.

5. Sunbearer Trials by Aiden Thomas 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🦹🦜 I can’t believe I forgot to do a review of this one considering I really enjoyed it. So it’s YA dystopian Latin America folklore kind of like superhero and god goddess. Really heart warming found family coming of age. Also in the vein of hunger games etc. I loved the universe and the structure of the world. Each character was well developed throughout the book. Main character is someone you want to see succeed. I’m so excited for book 2. Lots of neurospicy peeps represented in my opinion.

6. Simon Snow Trilogy by Rainbow Rowell🏳️‍🌈🪄🧛🏻🐲 Also YA feel book one has a lot of Harry Potter jabs but it’s not a direct parody. I also think in book 2 3 they take jabs at diff genres which was fun. The series is very funny has perspective from all the characters. The universe is interesting. Romance is decent. Lovable characters. It isn’t good to think too hard about anything.

7. The Unbroken by CL Clark 👯‍♀️⏳👑🪄 this book would be higher up if I wasn’t iffy on the main couple individually I’d rank both leads pretty high on best characters. It’s a book about colonialism political magic rebellion found family. It’s action packed it’s interesting with a good mystery. A disabled main character and a more male presenting lesbian with is something new. Touraine is going to do what Touraine thinks in her heart while Luca serves with her brain and wallet.

8. So this is ever after by f. t. Lukens 🏳️‍🌈👯‍♀️🪄👑⏳ Does what it says on the tin is YA. Medieval setting with standard fantasy quest group. Very easy read.

9. Out of the Blue by Jason June 🏳️‍🌈🧜🏻‍♂️🎬🎓very YA vibes. Very romance. About a nonbinary mer person on their journey out of the ocean to help a human and a film obsessed gay chubby human on his journey to get over a relationship. I would have this book ranked higher except for the ending and School vibes do kind of make me cringe.

10. Temperature of You and Me by Brain Zepka 🏳️‍🌈🦹🔎 about a boy whose skin is fire and human who works at a dairy queen. Mystery is weak some holes in the plot.Romance very immature. School age kids.

Okay so audible had a sale anddd I got a couple titles on there (if I have to spend a fortune on gas and tolls I’ll spend a small one on the books that keep me sane) and I have 4 Libby audiobooks checked out. I still have a hard time with wlw books. Or too much thinking. It needs to hit a sweet spot for me since I’m usually driving in hard conditions so can’t use the super brain on the story. Anyways any suggestions or recs would be welcomed!!!

[wiredsmi1e]

good morning guys , gals , & nonbinary pals ! i just wanted to take a second to say a few things :

to start, i wanna say how much i love & appreciate each & every last one of you for sticking around with me this long or for following just recently , even despite my recent bouts of inactivity . you guys are all so wonderful , talented , creative , & just incredibly sweet & understanding individuals . i'm so honored that every last one of you appreciate my writing , graphics , whatever it is that draws you to this blog , or any of my other ones-- it truly warms my heart & makes me feel SO special knowing how many of you think my writing & graphics are good . these past few months have been .... a lot & tbh i've struggled with so many things both here & in real life on top of my loss of my wifi yet again ; i've debated leaving tumblr or at least suzie here behind entirely a plethora of times as well , but there's always something that pulls me back to this shy lil baby or wherever it is that i wanna be , & it's you guys . i know that sounds cheesy , but it's so true . the friendships i've made bc of this hellsite , the content i've been introduced too & the incredible writers & ppl i've met on here mean SO much to me . i'm just in my feels ig thinking about you guys , about how lucky i am to have so many sweet , talented , & caring ppl following me . i need to get back here so i can start writing with all of you again , but thank you all so much for sticking around regardless & for just being the coolest followers a girl could ask for ♡

[smithcollegegirls2004]

hey!!! anon that asked for mcr recommendations and advice on getting past the “missing out” feeling, back again!! first of all i wanted to say thank you sm for writing such a big response and giving me so many helpful recommendations!!!! all of this really means a lot to me and is extremely reassuring, so thank you <33 and i 100% agree that despite my regret of not getting into the band earlier this is definitely the best time to be an mcr fan based off of everything that’s been going on!!!! it is unbelievably heart-warming to see how happy and healthy everybody in the band is right now!! and seeing mcr tumblr go completely off the walls over cheergate recently was such a fun time and god did it make me Feel. i just remember going through an abundance of posts that night from trans/nonbinary people talking abt how much it meant to them and how happy they were for gerard, and for the same reasons it meant a lot to me as well. ALSO omg three cheers for revenge enjoyer hello!!!!! i literally found a three cheers shirt the other day and immediately impulse-bought it bc i knew i’d be dedicating myself to mcr’s discography very soon and that album cover is one of my favourites ever!!!! the album cover of all time (real). not to mention three cheers has the ghost of you on there my babygirl my sweet cheese my rotten soldier <33 oh and i listened to sleep for the first time recently as well????? mass casualties. i think sleep, mama and the ghost of you are my current faves pre-full-discography dive!! and on that note i’m so curious to know what ur fav mcr songs are!!!! AND ur fav three cheers song!!

ANON IM SO HAPPY UR BACK AND GETTING INTO THEM … peace and love on planet earth. its always a good time to be an mcr fan but we are thriving right now. theres a certain contagious joy in their happiness that spreads to us i think and its so beautiful to witness .also im so glad that u are a sleep enjoyer because shes my special girl <3333 love of my life ….

also ur so right abt three cheers album art truly iconic and we will always love . Always

ALSOENEURIUUUGFH okay i feel like my faves shift a lot because my taste changes and also because i truly do not believe they have a single bad song . BUT i do have like a loose top ten, with my top two being boy division & prison (sorry for being gay) and then everything falling into a nonspecific order after that : sharpest lives / jetset life / ftwww / vampire money / honey, this mirror / sleep / our lady of sorrows & either bury me in black or hang em high. i think. i dont know i have brain damage and i could write individual theses about every song they’ve ever made. im dying here . its so hard to be a bulletsrevengeblackparadedangerdaysconventionalweapons girl in this economy

and prison stands as my fav three cheers song but i usually stick jetset life as ALMOST tied with it but also its such a good album like truly no skips. every single song makes me go batshit fucking crazy everytime.

[regretthatsme]

Looney's Sister - Harry Potter x Fem!Lovegood!Reader

That's right bitches, bros, and nonbinary hoes. I'm back. I'm so happy that I finished a oneshot. AAAAAAHHHHHHHH! I'm sorry I've taken so long to post. But, it's here now!

Harry didn't know when his fondness for Luna's sister, Y/N, started. He just knew that he liked her a lot. They were quite good friends, actually. A few years ago, she saw him struggling with herbology, which just so happened to be Y/N's strong suit. It quite convenient honestly, especially when you consider the fact that Y/N was have issues in Defense Against the Dark Arts.

He knew from the start that his feelings for her were more than platonic. What he didn't expect was for him to fall so hard. But, how could he not when she was so perfect.

Her bubbly personality was so inviting and warm. Her eyes made e/c his favorite color. He adored her laugh; it sounded like a beautiful melody. Her smile was just as stunning.

Godric, I'm whipped, he thought. There was one issue, though. He couldn't for the life of him ask her out, ironic for a Gryffindor. What if she doesn't like me? How do I ask her out?

His mind would race into the late hours of the night, wondering how he would work up the courage to ask her out. He knew she wouldn't like something big and extravagant, for she had trouble processing lots of information at once, much like her sister. Her sister!

Harry wondered how he never thought of asking Luna before. I mean, their personalities mirrored each other almost perfectly. He quickly ran to the forbidden forest. Luna spent most of her time there.

"Hello, Harry." A dreamy voice called to him.

"Hello, Luna."

"Is there a reason you are here?"

"Umm... yeah." Harry's face became very hot suddenly, a stark contrast to the nippy weather that morning. "I-uh. I should probably come right out and say it, shouldn't I?"

"Yes, that would be most appreciated." Luna responded. Harry couldn't tell if she was sarcastic or not.

"I've fallen deeply in love with your sister, and I was wondering if you knew how I could ask her out."

Luna was clear shocked by this revelation. She thought for a few minutes before replying, "I appreciate your honesty, however I cannot say that I am too pleased with it."

Harry's face fell slightly. "What does that mean?"

"Harry, she's recently had her heart broken by another. I'm sorry, but I do not trust you with her love."

-*-*-*-

He knew he shouldn't be over thinking this. He knew that it was pointless. He knew it was only going to give him stress, but he couldn't stop as much as he tried. Who would dare hurt her? Her? The most caring, beautiful person in Hogwarts?

Needless to say, Harry's eyes were sporting some serious under eye bags the next morning.

"Harry, what's wrong?" Asked Hermione during breakfast, noting the discoloration under her friend's eyes.

"Nothing. I'm fine."

"He was up late last night." Said his best friend and roommate, Ronald Weasley.

"No, I wasn't, Ron."

"Okay. Fine. You went to bed at a reasonable time." Ron said before turning to Hermione and mouthing No he didn't. Harry was about to retaliate before a small body sat down next to him. A dreamy voice rendered his speech effectively useless as a flush filled his cheeks.

"Hello Hermione, Ron. Good morning, Harry." She addressed each individually, as she always does. "How are we this morning?"

Ron smirked a small bit at his friend's face. "Oh, I'm splendid." He remarked, chuckling slightly at his friend's state. "What about you, Harry?"

Y/N seemed to perk up at the name. Her head turned to him, only now noticing the rosy hue on his cheeks. "Oh dear, you don't look so well." Her voice was distinctly quieter, almost as if she only wanted him to hear. Her hand slowly came up to feel his forehead. "You're absolutely scalding! And it's clear you haven't gotten any sleep."

She panicked slightly.

Ron tried to hold in a laugh. "Oh, yes. Harry was hacking and wheezing last night. It was horrible."

Harry's eyes were about the size of saucers. "What are you doing?" He whispered.

"Trust me." He mouthed back.

"He's in no shape to go to class. Someone must take care of him." Harry just realized what Ron was trying to do. Wanker.

"I would, but Hermione and I have a test first period." Hermione nodded too, quickly becoming aware of his scheme. "Looks like you're going to need to take care of him. I really wish I could help."

Y/N's eyes never left Harry's face. "Be sure to tell the teachers about Harry's predicament." She said as she dragged him out of the great hall, despite his protests. She knew the password was as she was a frequenter of the Gryffindor common room. He was led to his dorm and was forced onto the bed.

"Y/N, I'm gonna tell you one more time. I'm not-"

"Shhhhhh." She cut him off. "Harry, relax. I can't remember the last time you did." She did have a point. He couldn't remember the last time he had a stress free hour, much less day. "I'm going to go to the kitchen and whip up something. Get some rest, alright?" He nodded his head. His eyelids slowly fluttered and closed. He didn't really dream, but he felt a sort of presence. It felt like a giant hug.

He didn't know how long he had been asleep, but he woke to the sound of Y/N closing his bedroom door. "I made a soup with some clowort root mixed in. It should help with your symptoms." She said. "And, there is some water to wash it all down."

"You never cease to amaze me." He said rather bluntly in his sleepy delirium. He took a spoonful of the soup. It tasted quite like the food in the great hall, but there was something distinctly different from it. There was an unmistakable taste of... home. He quickly went for more.

"Slow down, Harry!" Y/N's volume raised ever so slightly. "Consuming large amounts of clowort root can lead to some unwanted side effects."

"Like what?"

She gestured for him to lead forward, as if telling him a secret. "People tend to make quite irrational decisions when copious amounts of clowort are in their system." She pulled back and gave a stern yet loving gaze.

"I don't know. I've eaten a decent amount and I don't feel a thing." He said indifferently. She simply rolled her eyes and looked away from him.

"Hey. I uh... I heard from Luna that you had some trouble with a boy and I'm here if you need to talk or anything." He knew that he probably shouldn't invite his crush to talk openly about a romantic partner she had, but he would listen to her talk about anything and everything just to hear her voice.

"Oh. It's nothing. Just a stupid fling that hadn't even lasted a month." Y/N said, her eyes becoming more solemn looking.

"It's just... if I had a girlfriend," especially one as perfect as you, "I would treat her better than that."

"I can see the brash decision making has already taken effect." Y/N jokes lightly, but only was laughing at it.

"I'm serious, you know." He said, grabbing her hand and lacing her fingers through his.

"Harry, you're not thinking straight-"

"Ever since we met each other and you helped me with your helped me with my homework. You were so kind."

"Harry, please don't-"

"I understand if you don't feel the same way, I wouldn't be so keen on falling in love someone who nearly dies every other weekend either, but I needed you to-"

"Harry." Her voice was ferm enough to cut off his incoherent ramblings. Her thumb brushed against the back of his hand. "You're not well. You're saying things you don't mean-"

"No, I'm not-"

"Harry, I can't have my heart broken again." Her eyes held a certain glossiness to it that he hadn't seen before. Her voice was almost breaking. "You are amazing and sweet and beautiful and... well, words can hardly describe how much I admire you. But," Her eyes darted around the room, trying to avoid eye contact. "You're just doing this because you're sick and under the influence. You don't mean it-"

"Yes, I do!" Harry giggled slightly. He was getting a bit frustrated at this point. "What do I have to do to prove it to you?"

She looked deep into his emerald eyes. They say eyes are the window to the soul, and they weren't lying. Every emotion, every thought running through his pretty head, everything could be seen in them. It was so intense, she could only make eye contact for a few seconds.

"Nothing." Y/N whispered. Harry's head snapped to her. "I believe you, Harry." They sat in silence for a while, processing the revelation that just took place. It was a bit awkward. Okay, very awkward. The apprehension of the unknown was creeping upon them. Now what? Where do we go from here?

Harry was the first to make a move. He held his arm out, inviting her join him on his, rather small in hindsight, bed. She happily accepted and curled into his side. She was practically on top of him due to the size of the bed, yet he couldn't be happier. Neither could she.

Bonus:

"HARRY JAMES POTTER, WHAT ON EARTH DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING?" Y/N was positive that Luna's cries could be heard throughout the entire castle.

"Luna, please calm down-" She tried to console.

"GET AWAY FROM MY SISTER!"

[elfboyeros]

Too Many Feelings

Fandom: Criminal Minds

Ship: Spencer Reid and Self Interest

Words: 1,876

Content: language, nonbinary language, angst, fluff, depressed Reid {mc'sorry}, mention of Maeve, post-season 8, comfort, dancing, talking about feelings

Note: I'm the one who wrote Another Dr. Reid and I mentioned in that post I might make a part two to that story. Yeah, this ain't it, and that will probably not get a part two! ! Edit after the fact: This will not have multiple but will strickly be a one off because I have no motivation and apparently my brain can only write Spencer Reid Oneshots mc'sorry! Enjoy

Spencer did not think his night would be like this… crying on the shoulder of someone he could consider a partner, swaying to soft music. He also thought he would be dancing with anyone that weren’t his friends, well closest friends. Cordelia, the person he was dancing with, was a friend. Although Cordelia is different than his co-workers, then his family. Running into them only by chance and an act of clumsiness, Spencer was greeted with an English professor in his local library.

He wanted to get out of the house, and found refuge in old books he didn’t own, what was doing in the arts section, who knows. He was looking for anything although when he rounded the corner into the R section, he bumped into pale skin, fluffy white, gray eyes, and heart-shaped glasses. Which caused a small stack of books fall to the floor.

“I’m sorry,” Spencer remarked, dropping to his knees, “I wasn’t paying attention!”

The individual chuckled, “It’s not a problem,” they replied, “I should have been watching where I was going too.”

“Romanticism: 100 Poems and Romantic Realities: Speculative Realism and British Romanticism,” he muttered, reading the titles of the books.

“Yeah, I have become a romantic for romanticism,” they replied as Spencer handed the books back.

“One unique thing about romanticism is that it’s meaning it is difficult to fathom with words. Not because of the inefficiency of language but rather the complexity of the movement, and the fact that it did not have a definite technical art style,” Spencer rambled.

“It is,” they replied, with a smile, “romanticism also introduced the idea of drama.”

“Because it the neoclassical movement that promoted rational thoughts, science, practicality, and material aspects of the human form, preferring to showcase emotions, and drama!”

“I thought I was the only one who was obsessed with romanticism, I’m Cordelia Paris.”

“Spencer Reid,” he replied, “I’m actually not, I just read it once.”

“Oh, what are you obsessed with in the ways of studies.”

Spencer made a new friend that day. The mostly likely reason he enjoyed speaking to them was because they listened, actively. Every little fact, story, his education, and rambling he spouted they listened with an intrigued look. But he wasn’t the only one talking, he learned that Cordelia was a professor, they had a doctorate themselves, with a love for romanticism, media, and art movements where just a few on a long list.

The feeling of euphoria he felt meeting someone that appeared to enjoy is company made him feel so warm, the same warm feeling he felt with Maeve.

Yeah Maeve…

It was like his world fell apart when he finally figured out why he seemed attracted to Cordelia - on a level that his brain to so long to comprehend - was because they remained him of Maeve, and it scared the shit out of him.

Maeve cannot be replaced, there will not be another person like Maeve in the world and the idea of replacing her, terrified him, but he also wanted to start anew, that how he ended up dancing with Cordelia in their apartment.

He agreed to have dinner with them at their place, after many missed friendly events at coffee shops, library, and bookstores. Which Spencer really enjoyed, soft music in the background, good food, and even better conversation.

“Spencer are you alright,” Cordelia asked.

He had been staring on at an empty plate for a good 2 minutes, before looking back at Cordelia who sat across from him with a tilted head and furrowed brow, “yeah, everything is fine, I’m good.”

“Don’t lie,” they replied.

“I’m just thinking,” he sighed.

“About?”

Cordelia never pressed him too much on the topic of Maeve, even though they could tell when he was thinking about her, “Spencer it’s okay you can talk to me.”

He took a moment to read their expressions: calm, concerned, and willing to listen, “is it wrong for me to enjoy this so much?”

“Enjoy what exactly?”

“Being with you.”

The three words he said made them blush slightly, “I don’t believe so,” they answered, “by I could be bias.”

“There is part of me that doesn’t want to replace her,” Spencer replied, standing from his chair, beginning to paced slowly, “but another part of me wants to move on.”

“That is completely natural,” Cordelia replied.

“Cordelia, I-I-I felling myself falling in love with you, and I find myself comparing you to Maeve and I don’t want to do that-”

“Spencer,” they breathed, quietly.

“Because you’re not Maeve, she was one of a kind and now she gone,” he continued before turning around quickly to face Cordelia, “I know that, but when I start thinking about you, I think about Maeve. It makes me not want to change what we have right now, because I don’t want to ruin our friendship!”

“Spencer…”

He can’t hear them, well more like, he doesn’t want to hear them, “but I want to give to this feeling... this desire – hell I don’t know – and start something new with you, but…I feel like I can’t.”

“Spence,” they remarked loudly, approaching him, “breath, please.”

He inhaled and exhaled, “there are somethings that your big, beautiful brain can’t explain,” they joked, cupping his cheek, “your own feeling seems to be one of them.”

Spencer flashed then a sad smile, “I’m not Maeve and I will never be Maeve.”,” Cordelia stated, firmly, “You are allowed to feel the way your feelings! You are allowed to miss Maeve, mourn her! You are allowed to develop new feelings! And you are allowed to move on, I personally think Maeve would want you too.”

He didn’t say anything leaning into their hand on his cheek, “does it feel better to hear it, out loud?”

“A little,” he muttered, “none of this bothers you? It would be a lot easier to find someone better than me. I’m not most men and that turns off a lot for peo-”

“Spencer, Spencer, slow down,” they cooed, “you’re not the only one falling in love.”

He cupped their face in his hands, as their own hands rested on his chest. The urge to kiss Cordelia was unbelievably strong, although it felt wrong, to pull their face so close to his, “I…I’m sorry, I want to kiss you, but I can’t…”

“Spence, it’s alright, like a said: slow.”

He could hear the soft music in the background as he let go of their face slowly resting his hands on their shoulders, “I had this dream for a while, after Maeve died, where she would ask me to dance,” he explained, softly, “I know it’s probably not the best idea, but I…”

“We can dance, Spencer,” they said cutting him off, “if that’s what you want.”

Spencer nodded sheepishly, “I would like that a lot,” he muttered.

His hands went to Cordelia’s waist, and their around went around his neck, which lead to sway to the music. It wasn’t before long that he pulled them incredibly close hugging him to them to himself, as he did with Maeve in his dreams.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice cracking slightly as his head fell to their shoulder, “for not being normal.”

“Normal isn’t attractive,” Cordelia joked, softly.

“I just-”

“Shush, you’re trying too hard, Spence, you’re allowed to relax,” they interjected, “and when I say relax, I mean your brain.”

Spencer let out a sad chuckle, “thank you,” he mumbled.

“Of course, Spencer,” Cordelia muttered, rubbing his back, “I’m always going to be here for you.”

They could feel him shake, “is everything okay?”

“Yeah,” he sighed, as tears rolled down his cheek, “everything is perfect.”

And we’re back to the beginning Spencer crying Cordelia’s shoulder, swaying to the soft music that played from their stereo, “raise up for a moment, Spence.”

Spencer did what he was asked. Cordelia cupped the left side of his face, wiping his tears before kissing his cheek, “you’re allowed to cry,” they murmured, “but you are gorgeous when you smile.”

He laughed, slightly, “you are the one who is gorgeous,” he retorted, quietly as they wiped his remaining tears, before their hand drop to his chest, “the term gorgeous, comes from Old French gorgias ‘fine elegant’, in the late 15-century.”

Cordelia smiled letting out a giggled, “slowly get average Spencer back.”

A smiled painted Spencer’s face as he took a hold of the hand on his chest, “very slowly,” he commented, “thank you again.”

“You’re welcome.”

“I feel like I should say more,” he exhaled.

“Spencer nothing else needs to be said,” they replied rest their head on his shoulder, “It’s not that I don’t love the sound of your voice, but you don’t need to justify your feelings or what exactly you are thinking.”

“All I’m thinking about now is you,” he mumbled, softly leaning his head to the side to rest against theirs.

“You’re not the only one.”

“So, you’re think about yourself,” Spencer joked.

“No,” Cordelia chuckled, “I’m think about you.”

“What about,” he questioned, tenderly.

“The future…” they answered, “more specially a future with you.”

Spencer hummed, closing his eyes, “a future with you would be amazing,” he yearned.

Cordelia hummed in response as they continued to sway to the music, making them both feel a sense of homeyness. Spencer could have like for hours. Although of course with a job like his nothing good ever lasts. He ignored his phone the first time, opting to stay in his heaven like utopia for as long as he possibly could, but of course it rang a second time.

“Son of a bitch,” he cursed, before pulling away from them and taking his phone out of his pocket, “Cordelia, I have to go…”

“It’s alright,” they replied.

“It isn’t, I’d rather stay here,” he commented.

“You say that like you’re not coming back,” Cordelia pronounced.

“Oh no, I’m coming back,” Spencer retorted, before slipping his phone back in his pocket, “you were not the only thinking about a future together.”

They smiled at his comment, “I’m looking forward to that.”

He hugged them tightly, “I’m so sorry, for leaving like this,” he muttered, “this is not how I wanted to end tonight, not after everything.”

“We need to work on how much you apologize,” they replied, “because everything is more than alright.”

“I’m taking you at your word, gorgeous,” Spencer countered.

Cordelia smiled up at him as he kissed their forehead, “I’ll see you later,” they spoke gently.

“Of course,” he replied.

“Now, go or they will call you again.”

“I’m going,” he replied with a dorky smile.

“No, you are staring at me,” they reacted, “with your tall self.”

Spencer laughed, “okay, okay, I’m going,” he before turning to leave, “wait.”

He quickly turned around lunging himself back over to Cordelia and quickly kiss their cheek, “okay, I’m good.”

“See you when you get back,” Cordelia replied, now dealing with the empty plates on their dining table.

“I’ll send you updates if we have to leave the state!”

“Thank you, now go, please!”

“I’ve got all my shit and I’m heading out the door!”

“Actually, open my front door,” Cordelia countered laughing.

“Leaving,” Spencer chuckled before leaving the apartment, leaving Cordelia smiling widely.

[fantasia-monogram]

As the clock strikes midnight, part 1

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / epilogue

♥️ Taeyang x reader (nonbinary, female anatomy) x Jaeyoon; mentions of other SF9 members

♥️ Suggestive (~2k words); smoking, mentions of alcohol, (lightly) implied BDSM. Mutual pining. Next part is going to be NSFW (and reveal more about the characters’ history).

♥️ You’re a beast at work, having to be tough to climb up the corporate ladder, but what you never thought of is that your attitude might be intimidating to your long time crush. Luckily, your much more laid back friend is here to help... both of you.

♥️ Disclaimer: this is just for fun! I’m not claiming that’s how they are in real life, it’s just my imagination doing whatever it wants. Read at your own discretion.

“Ah, the exciting world of corporate banking.”

You were too tired to check the time, but one look over the room gave you a clear idea of what kind of stage the party has reached: vast office space, with all the desks pushed against the wall and a long table situated in the middle, was littered with barely-sober people, most of them in groups of two or three. The goal was to let coworkers of various titles and positions mingle in a casual manner, as the fairly young company’s hierarchy and employer count was expanding proportionately to its growth - friendly office culture was a staple in this place. Truth was, after a couple drinks (or, in case of some tougher individuals, whole bottles of soju), everyone would group into their regular lunch break cliques, usually within the same department.

Long gone were the days when the business was much smaller, and it was easier for people from different departments to form close bonds.

Luckily, you remembered them very well, and that’s why, as the party was dying down, you shared a (small and not very comfortable) couch with your two best colleagues: Lee Jaeyoon and Yoo Taeyang.

“Look at him. What a fighter,” Jaeyoon said with a hushed voice, pointing his almost full glass of whisky towards another corner of the spacious room. There, behind one of the squished-together desks, Quality Department leader Kim Inseong was still angrily babbling about work-related statistics to the nearly-wasted Training Supervisor, Baek Juho. The latter, with his forehead propped on his hand, kept waving at his superior to stop, as coherent words would not come out of his mouth at this point no matter how hard he tried. Inseong, incredibly professional yet warm and welcoming when sober, would do a total 180° after a single bottle of soju and turn into a snarky bastard ranting at everything going on in the company.

“Supervisor Baek is holding on strong, though,” Taeyang added in a matter-of-fact tone before taking a sip from his glass.

You couldn’t help but cover your mouth and snort with amusement.

The three of you were an unusual group. 

You all joined the company on the same day, and underwent basic training for a couple weeks. Even though Jaeyoon was close to your age, the gap between you and Taeyang was much bigger. Add their impressive height and you had to admit, it was awkward to sit between these two guys every single day. Soon enough though, your small talk during short breaks would turn more and more enjoyable, and when the last week rolled in, as the oldest one, you mustered up the courage to invite them to a nearby coffee shop. Formally, you just wanted to celebrate the end of your training stage, but honestly… You grew fond of them, so there was no harm in getting to know them better away from the workplace.

Who knew the three of you would find common ground during that fateful meeting?

“Hey… Y/n… You there?” Jaeyoon’s voice snapped you out of a trip down the memory lane.

“Yeah. What were you saying?” you asked, a bit embarrassed.

“You don’t seem to be having fun at all. I haven’t seen you around the bar even once,” Jaeyoon ranted, haphazardly shaking his glass.

“You know I don’t drink.”, you stated calmly.

“Aish… It’s a party! No need to be so strict. Am I right?”

For some reason, Jaeyoon looked towards Taeyang with a wicked grin, and you followed. The youngest one, sitting by your right side, cleared his throat theatrically.

“I’ll go get myself another one.” he mumbled, already leaving the couch.

“Don’t overdo it!” Jaeyoon yelled, then turned back to you. “You could really use some percents, though. Just saying.”

“I have an image to maintain,” you said quietly, crossing your arms against your chest.

“You dressed like it’s every other day at work, too,” your friend pointed out, “It’s just a different colour.”

You looked at him resentfully. That’s true, tailored suits were your usual look, not just because you simply didn’t like dresses or skirts. It was the easiest way to elongate your silhouette, and you were already lacking in height compared to all the higher-ups attending company meetings with you.

A powerful look was expected from the Compliance Supervisor who rose to that position in a record-breaking time and was nowhere near done career-wise. 

Besides, you had to admit, your neat suits in a whole variety of colors boosted your confidence every single day. You had all of them adjusted, so they would accentuate your figure in all the right places. Oh, all the times you and Jaeyoon would shamelessly ask poor Taeyang who’s got the best ass out of you two (“Okay, forget it. Taeyangie does,” Jaeyoon would end the competition each time, making Taeyang cringe).

"You're just jealous because I look better in red than you do," you barked, although lacking any real bite. 

"Listen, what I'm trying to say is…" Jaeyoon leaned dangerously close to your ear. "...I don't mind your uniforms, but someone over there is on the brink of losing his mind right now." 

You backed off, wide-eyed. Your friend discreetly threw a glance towards Taeyang, who just came back with his glass refilled. 

Still dumbfounded, you kept looking back and forth at each of your friends, not realizing how silly it must have looked.

"Did I miss anything?" Taeyang asked, clearly feeling something went down during his absence. 

"Yeah, I just said that maybe we should leave this remnant of a party and move somewhere else," Jaeyoon replied, looking over your shoulder at the youngest. 

You furrowed your eyebrows, but ultimately decided his idea wasn't that bad after all. 

"I don't know… Wouldn't it be rude to leave so early?" Taeyang mused. 

"Seokwoo left, like, at 9," Jaeyoon pointed out. "Way before anybody had a chance to get drunk." 

"Ah, our lovely Escalation Specialist," you sighed, talking about Kim Seokwoo, your right hand man at the Compliance Department. "You could say the party escalated too much for him."

"At nine!", the older of your friends laughed. 

“What time is it anyway?” you asked. It didn’t matter that you could just check it yourself. You were used to people doing things like this for you around this place.

Jaeyoon, who knew it very well, fished his phone out of his shirt pocket.

“Uh… Fifteen to twelve,” he announced.

Taeyang tapped your shoulder. 

"Happy early birthday," he threw casually. 

Pleasant warmth rose to your cheeks. You were just starting to smile, your eyes crinkling already, when Jaeyoon jumped in his seat, startling both of you. 

"Wait, what?!" he yelled, making a few heads turn for a second or two. 

"What kind of a friend are you, really?" Taeyang snorted dryly, "It's y/n's birthday tomorrow." 

Jaeyoon let out a sound that could best be described as a happy roar and pounced forward in an attempt to give you a bear hug. You dodged it by moving backwards, thus colliding into Taeyang's side. 

You briefly glanced at each other, awkwardly nodding as an apology, before he uttered a quick it's fine and slid further into the couch. 

"Hey, that hug was supposed to be a present!" Jaeyoon whined, recovering his dignity after the failure. 

"Thanks, but no, thanks." you retorted, staying at a safe distance.

"Okay, but now we really have to go somewhere else. This calls for a celebration!" Your overly enthusiastic companion wasn't giving up that easily.

You turned to your other friend. 

"Taeyang?"

"That's enough social interaction for today," the boy in question replied, "One more crowded place and I'll pass out on the spot." 

He was known for his introverted tendencies; even at work, he occupied a desk that was a bit further from everyone else, guaranteeing him all the peace he needed, and had only one coworker he was somewhat close to apart from you two. 

"What about we go to my place instead? I've got no alcohol, but there are plenty of leftovers for a late dinner if you're hungry," you offered instead. 

"Sounds like a plan!" Jaeyoon clasped his hands. "I'll pay for the cab." 

Taeyang bottomed out his glass. 

"Wanna go for a smoke while we wait?"

As soon as you put a cigarette in your mouth, Taeyang was there to light it. You could swear his eyes lingered on your lips, but maybe it was so late that your eyes started pulling tricks on you. 

A good five minutes passed of the three of you smoking in silence, enjoying the cool summer breeze and the sight of a nearly full moon above you. Taeyang was the first to finish, with you following. Jaeyoon was the last to end his cigarette, throwing it into the trash can nearby in a somewhat angry manner. 

"Taeyang, I can't possibly imagine a better time to tell them than now."

Both you and Taeyang turned your heads towards Jaeyoon.

"Tell what?" you posed a question, confused. 

The guys exchanged looks. After that, Taeyang averted his eyes, while Jaeyoon locked his with yours. 

"I think he should be the one to explain." Jaeyoon stated firmly. 

"It's fine," Taeyang's voice was unexpectedly weak, "I'm fine with you telling them." 

You felt your heartbeat quicken all of sudden. 

"He's head over heels for you." 

And then, it was as if your heart just stopped. No, that couldn't be. Your pretty, soft spoken dongsaeng you always had your eyes on? In love with you?

"No way." you muttered, turning to face Taeyang. He still couldn't bear to look at you. "Is that true?" 

Internally, you were screaming for him to say yes. 

Poor guy seemed like he was about to get a panic attack, breathing in and out loudly, hands balled into fists. You could see him biting his lips.

"Come on." Jaeyoon ushered, "I did the hard part for you. Now it's your turn." 

Taeyang slowly raised his gaze. His doll-like eyes were glazed over with tears - a sight so stunning it almost made you gasp. 

"It's true. It's been going on for more than two years now." His voice was quiet, but steady.

You kept staring at his gorgeous, flushed face, unable to say a word. It was a clue for him to continue. 

"I knew I had a chance. I'm not stupid. I noticed you treated me differently than Jaeyoon or any other friend at work. But I also knew your no relationships at the workplace policy and your attitude towards age gaps, and decided to keep it to myself." 

Your heart was about to burst. 

"I'm just as demanding in love as I am at work," you explained, "I'd ruin you."

Jaeyoon circled you. As soon as he stopped, he put his left hand on Taeyang's shoulder, while his right on yours. 

"Tell them," he encouraged the younger guy again. 

As if on command, there was fire burning in Taeyang's gaze. You felt it consume you as a whole.

"I'm not fragile," the boy declared, “I want to be ruined.”

You thought you were dreaming, but a squeeze of Jaeyoon’s hand on your shoulder anchored you back to reality, this reality being your crush at first sight confessing to you.

“Your confidence… How strict and relentless you are…” Taeyang went on, his voice breaking, “The tone of your voice… And your suits. Oh, your suits. It all turns me on so much.”

“What a guy,” Jaeyoon chuckled, shaking his head.

Both you and Taeyang decided to ignore him for now.

“I repeat,” Taeyang insisted, “I want to be ruined.”

Despite Jaeyoon’s continuous hold on both of you, you reached towards Taeyang’s face to caress his smooth cheeks with the back of your fingers. That was all he needed to surge forward and plant a brief, fluttering kiss on your lips that still managed to leave you with your head spinning, needing more.

“Happy birthday, y/n,” Taeyang whispered, holding his forehead against yours.

It was only then when you realized you were both breathing heavily, even though nothing had happened yet.

The moment was interrupted by the ringtone of Jaeyoon’s phone. At last, the guy ceased his hold on you to check the device.

“Okay, lovebirds, the cab is here. It’s gonna be a fun night.”

You glanced at Jaeyoon, then locked your eyes with Taeyang’s again. He reciprocated your devious smile.

(to be continued)

[iamnotawomanimagod]

If I Can’t Have Love, I Want Power - A Reluctant Ranking of Every Track

Disclaimer: This entire album is incredible, truly no skips, and I also think it’s an album that is hard to separate into individual tracks, because it all goes so well together. But I still wanted to try! This is just my personal opinion, and it’s subject to change. (Also I surprised myself. And I bet I’ll change my mind by tonight.)

Please feel free to do your own and tag me in it!! I wanna see!!

13. Girl is a Gun

It’s not that I dislike this song, it’s just a sound that I didn’t expect on this album. I think it would’ve fit in better on Manic. I don’t love how it kind of just repeats over and over again, especially on an album so full of complex, intricate lyrics. But it’s a really upbeat, sexy song and I bet it’s going to be so fun live.

Favorite lyric: 

Time is a blessin', to me, it's a lesson And I can't be stressin' to give you attention 'Cause, oh, it's never enough, so I'm givin' you up And you'll be better with a nice girl, darlin'

12. Lilith

Similar to “Girl is a Gun,” I simply wasn’t expecting this kind of sound on this album - could’ve seen it on Hopeless Fountain Kingdom though! The bass is amazing and I love the rhythm.

Favorite lyric:

You know I get too caught up in a moment I can't call it love if I show it I just fuck things up, if you noticed Have you noticed? Tell me have you noticed?

11. Darling

This song is so sweet and charming, especially if you compare it to “More,” which I think it acts as a sort of sequel to. Something about the melody hits me just a little wrong. When they start singing, I can’t help but hear the verses of “Hopeless.” That might’ve been intentional, but I can’t get past it to hear this song as its own thing.

Favorite lyric:

Never knew the feeling of a stable home Been a couple years of living on the road Couldn't really tell you where they'd leave a stone To visit me when I am dead and gone

10. The Tradition

I love the haunting piano and vocals. It feels like a song that was written for the film specifically. (Was it even in the film, lol?) I really love the sound of it, but the lyrics don’t do very much for me.

Favorite lyric:

And I hope what's left will last all summer long And they said that, "Boys were boys", but they were wrong

9. The Lighthouse

This song reminds me the most of a Nine Inch Nails song - fitting that Trent Reznor provides backing vocals on the final verse. I love the grimy guitars, and and discordant beat, and the way it builds up. The melody is cool and liquid. The final verse really feels like waves crashing. It’s a well-written song that really shows off Halsey’s alternative side.

Favorite lyric:

Well, that should teach a man to mess with me He was never seen again And I'm still wandering the beach And I'm glad I met the devil 'Cause he showed me I was weak And a little piece of him is in a little piece of me

8.  Ya’aburnee

This song makes me really emotional. It makes me think of all the people I love the most and it makes me want to cherish my time with them even more. That’s an incredible feeling for an artist to create. It’s such a bittersweet song. I wanna cry but it also makes me smile.

Favorite lyric:

But what's worse? Telling you my feelings or to die without revealing That you crawled inside my head and set a fire there, instead Letting all my insecurity Devour me with certainty

7. honey

If you’ve ever felt this way for someone, this song stings in the best way possible. I love the rhythm and the drums and the guitars - this is peak pop punk and Halsey fits right in. I love the honey imagery, especially that she included some imagery about bees and the way honey clings.

Favorite lyric:

And now she's impatient and I'm complacent With just a little taste of wasting time Looking for honey But she stings like she means it She's mean and she's mine

6. 1121

Now this is the sound I expected from this album. Cinematic, dark, dramatic. The piano is so haunting and so beautiful. It evokes so much imagery through sound alone, even with the lyrics being relatively simple. And their voice is so incredible. The song overall reminds me a lot of Evanescence, which is high praise. And I really appreciate the “self-loathing in love” theme, I can relate to it a lot. I’ve already been singing the chorus at the top of my lungs whenever I play this song.

Favorite lyric:

Take one in the temple My tongue is a vessel I try to be careful with The thing inside my chest You shoot for the memory So you can forget me I'd leave if you let me, oh

5. Bells in Santa Fe

Ever since we heard a snippet of this song in the first film trailer, I’ve been desperate to hear the rest of it. It didn’t disappoint. I love her lower register vocals, the tinkling piano and the frantic rhythm. And I relate too much to the message of the song - loving someone so much but refusing to accept that they want forever with you, insisting that they’re better off without you, warning them that you could slip away at any moment. It hits me where I live.

Favorite lyric:

Jesus needed a three day weekend To sort out all his bullshit, figure out the treason I've been searching for a fortified defense Four to five reasons But, Jesus, you've got better lips than Judas I could keep your bed warm, otherwise I'm useless I don't really mean it, 'cause who the fuck would choose this?

4. I am not a woman, I’m a god

This song fucks. Claiming their power to create life - recognizing that as godly and divine, while also insisting this is not a power that makes them a woman. I can’t wait for it to become a smash hit and for people to be singing about a nonbinary/trans experience without even knowing it. I honestly have trouble even articulating why this song is so awesome, it just is. I’m pumped every time I hear it.

Favorite lyric:

Oh, I just wanna feel something, tell me where to go 'Cause everybody knows something I don't wanna know So I'll stay right here cause I'm better all alone Yeah, I'm better all alone

3. You asked for this

I really like the 90s alternative sound of this one, it reminds me of Alanis Morrissette and certain No Doubt songs. I think it’s a very realistic depiction of how settling down in life can be very bittersweet, and the things that we ask for are sometimes not what they seem to be. But we also come to realize that settling is a part of growing up. Still, Halsey sings about wanting everything, knowing there are contradictions in that. The chorus is fun and easy to sing to, and the final verse is so amazing.

Favorite lyric:

I want a beautiful boy's despondent laughter I want to ruin all my plans I want a fist around my throat I want to cry so hard I choke I want everything I asked for

2. Whispers

This one hits hard, but god, it’s so good. The way they whisper certain phrases. The simple piano under the first verse, the way it becomes more complex, the way the beat comes in. You want to dance and cry at the same time. The lyrics - I know so many of us can relate to them. The themes of self-sabotage and self-loathing are so strong in this album, which definitely hits me right in the chest.

Favorite lyric:

I've got a monster inside me That eats personality types She is constantly changing her mind on the daily Think that she hates me I'm feeling it lately Might have to trick her and treat her To 70 capsules or fly to a castle So at least we could say that we died being traveled

1. Easier than Lying

I’ve had this one on repeat since the album came out, and that surprised me at first, but god, this song is addictive. The crunchy guitar at the beginning, the driving rhythm, the way her voice contrasts with that. The scream-singing on the chorus. It’s the kind of song you want to drive way too fast to. The bridge!! Aaah! It’s just so badass and listening to it now gets me too hyped!! Also the way it can kind of be seen as a sequel to “Lie,” - the growth of going “if you don’t love me no more, then lie” to “losing you is easier than lying to myself” is so meaningful and so empowering.

My heart is massive but it's empty A permanent part of me, that innocent artery Is gasping for some real attention Some undivided hypertension I tell it "quiet down, you're being loud" But it beats harder every time you come around But do you love the sound?

I’m gonna tag some mutuals, just to share, and also to see if anyone else wants to do this! Also you don’t need to go as in-depth as I did if that’s intimidating or too much, I’m just wordy.

@demonzplay @easiersthanlying @ttpane @yoursalwaysleo @anarkyandmadness @feelingsiwontforget @tolerateit @tommyhardyx @elysiems @imacreepygirl @finallybeautifulstranger @inthenameofloveforthesakeofpower and I know I’m forgetting some folks, I’m sorry! Please feel free to steal this and also tag me in yours!

[malaks-perch]

your peppermint hero

nazali satrinava x reader

one of the satrinavas save you from a nasty incident at a party and as the night goes on you both decide meeting was for the better...

warnings: fluffy? idk.. its get a lil steamy??

a/n: PLEASE READ THIS vvv

for this particular fic, i want to clarify that nazali is presented as a nonbinary character which means they don't identify as a he or a she. i apologize if there are any pronouns. i tried to respect the nonbinary essence that is nazali satrinava! might be a little fast paced...

@greyhands has the perfect nazali reference for those of you who don't remember how they look! in my opinon of course!!!

here you were alone, at none other than the countess nadia satrinava’s party, drinking at the bar while you watched the bartender do tricks with a cocktail shaker.

“it’s amazing that the beauty of vesuvia fully extends to it’s citizens.” said a politician to your right. the flirtatious smile promised nothing, but trouble.

“i suppose it does. i’m sure the countess would be flattered to hear you enjoying your time here.” you?turned your head away from the overwhelming smell of wine coming from the stranger. “i’m not interested, thank you.”

“no?” he grinned, pushing off the bar.

you’d let out a sigh of relief when he was out of your sight. thanking the heavens for whoever was watching out for you, but your silent prayers were cut short when the smell of alcohol invaded your nostrils. the hand that curled along the nape of your neck made your body stiffen.

“but i am.”

two hands on either side of your body kept you caged to the bar. you spun around and before you could scold the stranger lips slammed into yours.

his tongue immediately lapped at your mouth and you shoved the man so hard he went stumbling back into the floor. he spit at your feet from where he lay on the floor, “that’s not very nice, sweetie—"

“darling, are you alright?” a smooth voice interrupted the man and a comforting warmth caressed your chilled skin.

you found a peppermint haired individual standing before you, brows pinched up at you before their attention cast down to the man on the ground.

“you dare lay a hand upon my lover?” growled your hero. your eyes never leaving the grey? maybe white? streaked in your hero’s scarlet hair.

you fought the smile on your face in favor of the situation you were in. it wasn’t hard upon seeing the look on your rescuer’s face.

the cordial gaze turned rancid upon staring down the scoundrel who forced himself on you. the man laying on the ground was frantically apologizing upon seeing the person beside you take claim to you. “i-i.. i am so sorry, y-your royal—"

“you weren’t sorry when you forced yourself upon—"

“hey.” your hands pulled at their sleeve making radiant violet eyes stop on you.

a gentle squeeze to the bend of their arm made them seem to relax upon staring at you and the gentleness from your actions reflected straight into their smile.

“i'm okay now, love." you took their hand and the smile that was all too similar to julian's made your heart flutter in the slightest.

the violet eyes that made your heart swell and their hand over yours did nothing to stop your skin from warming up. then the smile.

that smile.

they gave the man on the ground a smirk, "it seems my lovely partner would like it better if you didn't suffer by my hand."

your hero took your hand and leaned into you, casting the stranger a complacent look.

"excuse us." they smiled, guiding you out to the veranda.

a laugh escaped their lips and their violet eyes on yours made you bite your lip to keep from laughing with them. only because that laugh had you completely enamored with this hero.

"i apologize for not introducing myself, i'm nazali." they smiled, leaning into you and running a hand through their hair to reveal more of the red and white streaks.

bronze skin dotted with moles and the cutest dimples made had your breathing quicken. how on earth could someone look so good?

"i'm.. i'm y/n." you managed, taking nazali's hand only for them to press a light kiss to your knuckles. with those violet eyes.

you're sure that if it hadn't been for the chilly night air, you definitely would have blown a fuse for how those eyes seemed to set your skin aflame.

"you didn't have to do that." tearing your eyes from theirs and staring out at the garden illuminated by the moonlight.

a hand curling around yours made you smile and turn to find nazali giving you one of the sweetest smiles you'd ever seen.

"forgive me, given the situation you were just in and this may seem inappropriate, but you are..."

nazali dreamily smiled and leaned back into the balustrade to get a better look at your face.

"breathtaking."

there went your heart. pounding against your chest as you put a hand to your face and turned as if that hide how much their words were affecting you.

"i didn't mean to put you on the spot.." nazali's fingers guided your face so that your gaze locked with theirs. it was the soft chuckle from them that made you want to melt into the steady fingers that ghosted your cheek.

"you'll have to excuse me, it's a little hard to believe that from someone so attractive." you replied without missing a beat. immediately the words rang in your head and kicking yourself for not thinking them over.

"so it's safe to say you're attracted to me?" nazali smiled again. it was overwhelming — their words and the effect that smile had on you.

damn... that roguish smile.

you decided to go out on a limb, feeling giddy when the hand that once held yours, slid up your arm to caress the underside of it's bend and pull you closer.

"i think it's safe to say yes." you leaned into them as nazali's eyes flickered over your face.

"how lucky i am to have stumbled upon you." nazali's eyes dropped to something below your face and their smile fell and their thumb brushing your neck. "you're bleeding.."

you reached up to where nazali's hand once was and found a considerable amount of blood painting your fingers. "well.. how about that?"

"it doesn't look too serious." nazali laughed, shaking their head and offering a hand to you. "let's get that looked at."

nazali pulled you through the palace as if they'd been here many times before. sitting you beneath the bright lights of a beautiful dining room.

you hadn't the time to look around when nazali popped open an expensive liquor and poured a generous amount into a cloth.

"that looks expensive." you cringed at the thought of getting in trouble with the countess for getting a little too comfortable in her dining room. "shouldn't we go somewhere a little less private?"

"would you be more comfortable?" nazali asked, gently patting the wound on your neck. glancing at you before examining the scar on your neck.

you shrugged, fiddling with the ends of your robes. "don't get me wrong, i don't mind a little bit of privacy. i thought we would find a doctor, but having an attractive stranger helping me with my wounds is nice, too."

"i am a doctor, love." nazali laughed, setting down the handkerchief to get a look at you. "you didn't just assume i was a pretty face, did you?"

you couldn't help the sheepish grin on your face upon nazali's playful teasing. "and one heck of a humanitarian?"

nazali leaned forward brushing their nose with yours and cupping your cheek. "who are you mysterious apparation and what are you doing to me?"

"apparation?" you chortled, allowing yourself to run your hand through nazali's fairly tamed tresses. "are you suggesting that i am something you dreamed up?"

"no.." nazali's hands ghosted your waist for a moment as they waited for you to pull away. pulling you closer when you didn't. "this is much better than anything i could have dreamed up."

"so is this two strangers attracted to each other?" you asked pushing yourself so you no longer leaned on the table.

"it couldn't be." nazali murmured, both of you afraid to break the moment that was making your nerves scrambling to fight the overwhelming jitters beneath your skin. "please tell me you feel it."

"like sparking from a match? except it's everywhere?"

nazali grinned, pushing you back so your hips were pinned to the table.

"then tell me."

came their dominating voice making the sparking currents grow more intense upon feeling nazali's hands tighten on your hips.

"are you attracted to me?"

the position you were in would've been enough to answer anyone who stumbled upon you both. nazali's hands pinned your hips to the table while one of yours was pressed to their stomach and the other tangled in the now messy red hair.

you parted your legs, relying solely on nazali and the table behind you to keep you upright. one of them leaving the floor to pull nazali closer by wrapping a leg around their thigh.

"please.." your mind foggy from the close proximity nazali allowed, they weren't letting you off so easy.

a hand cupping the back or your neck and a grin curling up on the lips of your red haired hero.

the hand that tugged at the tips of your hair only slightl forced a gasp from your lips. the way nazali had you pinned gave them the upper hand allowing them to tower over you.

"use your words."

you nodded, staring up into the violet eyes that drowned out the rest of the world. "i'm so very attracted to you, nazali."

nazali, despite how their hand kept your head tipped back and the firm grip on your hips, the kiss was soft. gentle exchanges and a dance that suggested far more than two people looking for a late pass time.

you wrapped an arm around their neck and nazali smiled against your lips, letting their hand drop to cup your neck and pull you closer. the other pushed you sit atop the dinner table so you sat a few inches higher.

cheering made you jolt and you both found julian standing in the doorway. "i found your long lost satrinava!" called the doctor.

your head whipped to nazali who seemed to reflect your confusion. "you're a part of the royal family?"

nazali blinked, their hands running up and down your waist. "wait a minute. you didn't know?" they grinned upon seeing your head shake frantically. cupping your cheek again, "how lovely."

nazali pressed a steaming kiss to your mouth, opting to brush against your tongue for a taste before pulling away with the same roguish smile.

"my sisters will love you then."

before you could question nazali any further, all of the satrinava family came bursting into the room frantically questioning you and nazali about this relationship you both had supposedly been hiding.

nazali was impressed with how well you got along with their family given that most people would've felt overwhelmed. nazali's sisters muttered and poked at their older sibling for the look that nazali gave you as you spoke with nahara and nasmira.

yes. you definitely were a keeper.

[stardust-kenobi]

Hello there, can i please request a fic with obi wan finding out that his girlfriend (reader) is non binary. Pronouns: they/them Thank you so much Geralt

Hi Geralt! Thank you for your request. I really hope that you enjoy this. I apologize if it is short. I also apologize if its not exactly what you expected. I’m not familiar with writing about this kind of experience, but I’ll give my best try! :)

Your fingers trembled while interlocked with one another. Moisture formed on your palms and you shook them as if to discard your racking nerves. Today was the day you dreaded, yet pleasantly anticipated for so long. Your boyfriend, Obi Wan, was the first person you would come out to as a non-binary individual. This is who you were. You were unashamed, proud, and happy to finally feel like you were your true self. The next step was to tell the love of your life so that you could both move forward.

What if he doesn’t accept me? 

What if he doesn’t understand?

Will he look at me differently?

Will he still love me?

Your brain tumbled inside your head, running over every fear on the tip of your mentality. Obi Wan was compassionate, loving, caring, and so much more than made him such an indescribably amazing man. You had nothing to worry about...but you weren’t going to be convinced until he became aware.

The weight in your hand felt astronomical in the process of lifting it to his quarters’ door. Three gentle knocks followed. Seeing you was always the highlight of Obi Wan’s day, and when you told him you were coming to visit him, his eagerness was evident. Within seconds, and what felt like years, the door flew open to reveal the same gorgeous smile on the same wonderful partner you’ve loved for so long.

“Hello my dear” His voice, as smooth as ever, somehow lowered your rapid heart rate in that moment. 

“Hi” Was all you managed to form off your bitten lips.

“Are you alright?” His eyebrows furrowed when he saw the indiscreet anxiety presenting itself in your expression.

“Oh um...yeah, I’m fine” your words were undoubtedly unconvincing to the man that could see right through you.

“Do not lie to me, y/n” his tone grew stern and worrisome simultaneously.

“I cant…” your breath was shaking through your minimal words

“My sweet girl, whatever it is, everything will be okay” his usage of the word girl flipped a switch inside of you. You knew you had to just rip the band-aid off, and tell him the truth.

“Well, Obi Wan, that's actually...what I wanted to talk to you about” your words trailed out quietly.

“Okay…” he eagerly anticipated your response. His unwavering attentiveness warmed your heart.

“I’m…” you hesitantly began and then shut your eyes tight. Just do it, y/n.

“You’re what, y/n?” He encouraged you to continue your statement.

“I’m non-binary” you blurt out quickly and matter-of-factly. Whew, you thought. At least its out there.

Obi Wan stared into your eyes and then diverted his attention away at the floor for a moment. After he took the time to process what you had said, he then took your still wobbly hands into his own.

“Darling, I’m sorry, but I don’t understand what you mean” He began, your heart sunk, knowing you’d have to explain further. “Can you help me understand?” He pleaded delicately when he saw the dread on your face.

“I’m not a female…” you began.

“Okay” he actively listened.

“And I’m not a male either” you attempted to clarify. “To be honest with you, I never felt like I was either of those things”. You swallowed hard. “So I identify as nonbinary”.

Obi Wan shot a comforting grin at you without saying anything for what felt like forever.

“I’m very happy that you felt comfortable telling me this” He 

“I’ve been terrified of how you’d react”

“Oh no, my love...nothing about your identity could ever change the way I feel about you” he assured you.

You felt tears stream down your face as a result of pure relief and love for your boyfriend.

“So, just to clarify, how should I address you? I want to get this right” He displayed genuine concern and curiosity, which allowed you to open up and be comfortable with your identity.

“If you’re mentioning me in conversation with another person, instead of saying ‘she or her’, you’d say ‘they’ or ‘them’. It is a gender neutral identifier, since I’m neither male nor female.” You educate him with a basic explanation.

“Not a problem at all, sweetheart” He brought his lips to your forehead and tenderly kissed your skin.

“I truly appreciate how well you’re taking this” your tone was riddled with pleasant surprise.

“It would upset me to think you’d expect anything less of me” he became teasingly defensive. 

“I’m sorry, it’s just a huge change, and I understand that it could be jarring for you”

“ A huge change? You’re still my gir-” he cuts himself short. “Oh no, i’m sorry. What should I call you then, love?” Obi Wan’s unconditional acceptance brought you peace of mind.

You giggle at his engagement into the topic. You ponder the question for a moment, realizing you hadn’t thought of that yet.

“Just call me what you’ve always called me...your love” You suggested to him. He nodded in approval and pulled you in tightly for a firm, reassuring embrace.

[just-an-anxious-mess]

Double Standards (Part 2)

Part 1

Trigger Warning: Mentions of toxic parents, transphobia, mentions of past abuse, dead naming, wrong pronoun usage, low self esteem, unhealthy coping mechanisms, ableism, seasonal depression, thoughts of suicide and self harm. The Remus angst train will not be stopping.

They sat in their room trying to ignore their spiralling thoughts. They should have known better than to slip up and make a comment about their gender identity at dinner.

They'd known it wouldn't go down well and yet they'd still said something. Remus blamed it on their impulsivity and desire to feel validated for once.

Things had started off ok at first. They'd been forced out shopping with their mother and had come across another enby in the wild which had been great. They'd had a discussion about preferred pronouns while their mum and Roman had been in earshot.

Roman had of course been a complete ass the whole time round the shops and Remus was still furious about the leaves incident but they managed to hold themselves back from doing anything rash like breaking his nose which they felt was incredibly nice of them.

The individual at the checkout had given Remus a sudden boost in confidence and rekindled their motivation to correct their parents when they slipped up.

With this new energy they corrected their mother and the three of them (Remus, Roman and their mother) also ended up having a conversation about the LGBTQ+ on the journey home.

All in all things were going good and when they got home they decided to take the cashiers words to heart.

They had told Remus that their 5 year old cousin respected their pronouns and name more than their parents and so with this knowledge in mind Remus decided to talk to Patton.

"Hey Patton? My name is Remus now and instead of saying she or her when talking about me, I'd prefer you to use They and Them."

Patton had looked up at them with barely a moments hesitation and replied "Ok Remus."

Remus felt like their heart was going to burst at Pattons words and they couldn't fight the enormous smile that spread across their lips, especially as Patton continued to use Remus instead of their deadname.

Then dinner happened.

Everyone was sitting around the table as usual when Remus's mum used their deadname when speaking to them. Remus sighed but felt a little reluctant to correct her in front of their father, unsure if his infamous temper would explode at Remus 'backchatting' their mum.

Patton of course spoke up then, slipping up slightly thanks to hearing the deadname being used.

"It's Remus."

Remus was surprised when Roman spoke up on their behalf and was immediately suspicious, frowning slightly at his sudden jump to their defence.

"I call you Remus but mummy calls you [Deadname}" Patton stated, looking directly at their mother.

"That's because I named her after a friend of mines younger sister who died while I was pregnant with her."

Remus winced slightly, already having heard this story many times before. They avoided eye contact with their mother as she continued.

"The names I used to name her carry significant meaning to me so if I forget to call her Remus it's because of that. My friends sister was only 13 when she died and I swore to name you after her in her memory."

Remus just managed to stop from sliding down in their seat, guilt and shame suddenly weighing heavily on them as they thought on their mothers words.

Maybe they should have chosen something closer to their mothers friends sisters name? Maybe then there wouldn't have been as much issue with the whole nonbinary thing?

"I don't even know why you changed your name to Remus anyway? Names shouldn't define your gender. You didn't have to change your name, besides they're pretty much the same anyway."

Remus stared at Roman in shock and horror as they registered his words and felt sick as their mother made a noise of agreement and everyone seemed to just carry on with dinner as if nothing had happened.

When dinner ended Remus made a beeline straight to their room where they proceeded to think and overthink everything that had just happened.

All the stuff their family said weighed on them heavily to the point where they stared off into space for a bit as a horrifying thought crossed their mind.

What if they were faking all this? What if they weren't really nonbinary and it was just all a ploy for attention?

Thoughts of a similar nature bounced around their head, driving them mad with panic and making them rethink everything.

Stressed and in disarray Remus paced up and down, shaking their hands in a way similar to how they usually stimmed.

Eventually they sat down at their computer and tried to distract their buzzing mind with YouTube or music. It didn't have much of an effect.

Eventually they contacted Logan and let him know what had happened. As usual he was logical and spoke sense, even when Remus wasn't in a state to really register it.

His words somewhat reassured Remus. For now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Still feeling down from what had happened a couple days previously Remus didn't make as much of an effort to correct Patton or Roman anymore but sometimes their brothers would remember on their own.

Remus spent a lot of time trying to figure out why their parents seemed to have such an issue with their identity but there wasn't really anything they could come up with except their parents were just stuck in the way they'd been brought up.

Things eventually reached boiling point at dinner a few nights later.

Dinner always seemed to be the catalyst for shit hitting the fan. It was probably because that was the only time the entire family was present in the same room for extended periods of time.

It all started with Roman doing an impression of Stitch. It wasn't terrible but it was mildly annoying to Remus's ears. They'd rather eat dinner in peace.

"are you doing a Nelson Mandela impression?" Their mother asked, grinning like she'd made a hilarious joke.

"What? It's Stitch from Lilo and Stitch." Roman and Remus said at the same time, sharing confused looks which became exasperated as their mother continued.

"It sounds exactly like Nelson Mandela, you racist." She laughed, loud and grating on Remus's ears as she nudged their father who was also grinning.

Roman glared at the two of them and tried to again reiterate that it was an impression of Stitch.

"You're a racist, it's exactly the same as Nelson Mandela's voice." their father said, speaking over Roman which was a sure fire way to set off his infamous temper.

"I'm not racist! I don't even know what he sounds like, I was just doing an impression of a cartoon character. Not knowing that my Stitch impression sounds like..."

"That's how racism starts, ignorance!" both their parents were laughing now and Remus wanted nothing more than to shout for them to stop but they kept their mouth shut, something Roman had never learnt to do as he once again spoke up.

"Out of everyone here, you guys are the most racist. You continuously use outdated terms and words that are considered offensive in our current time period."

"Oh we're racist are we?"

"Yes! You're the least PC people in our whole family."

Their mother scoffed while their father was still grinning and shaking his head in disbelief at Romans words.

"The whole family? Even grandad?"

"Yes actually, at least grandad doesn't say anything homophobic or too racist in front of us."

"Actually I think it's the fact that you pretend to be better than him but you're on the same level when it comes to outdated and offensive comments and words."

For once Remus and Roman were working together to try and stop their parents from being as bigoted and offensive.

Perhaps it was the fact they were actually working together or maybe it was just because they had no response, the dining room fell into a slightly uncomfortable silence.

After a few moments of silence their mother spoke up once again, eyes locked onto Remus.

"are you going to change your middle name too?"

"wha..?" Remus was completely caught off guard by the question.

"Are you going to change the middle name? I mean it has sentimental meaning and your nan was so happy when i told her I was using her middle name for yours. You were her first grandchild. so are you going to change it?"

Remus struggled to come up with a response, feeling like they were being interrogated and put on the spot.

Once again Roman came to their defence.

"You can't pressure someone into going by a name they don't identify with by telling them it has meaning to you. It has meaning to you but it's not how they identify and it's selfish to expect them to stick with it just because of your feelings about the name."

"I named her after my friends little sister who died!"

"Yes, we know, you keep saying but it's still not fair to Remus to basically emotionally blackmail them into sticking with a name they don't identify with."

Remus watched their mother and brother in shock, a warm feeling in their chest at the fact Roman was sticking up for them in such a way.

The warm feeling was immediately replaced by dread as their father spoke up, his grin still in place but it quickly disappeared.

"I'll say whatever the fuck I want to. If you don't like it then you can fuck off. It's my fucking house and I'll fucking say what I fucking want to. And Remus is a stupid fucking name. You're [Deadname]. Don't like it? Then move out!"

With each word their father said the room grew more and more tense and Remus felt their eyes prickling as the dread was replaced with hurt at the knowledge their parents would clearly never accept them as they truly were.

They remained silent, staring down at their plate, trying to ignore the few tears starting to trail down their face.

They focused on shovelling food into their mouth, anticipating the end of dinner when they could make a bid for freedom to their room and breakdown in privacy.

As subtly as they could Remus wiped their eyes, determined not to let either of their parents see just how much their words had effected them. Plus Remus didn't want to give their father an excuse to have a go at them for being weak/overreacting.

Eventually both parents left the table and Roman and Remus were alone in the dining room with the task of clearing up.

Roman was still furious at the conversation during dinner and kept trying to talk to Remus about it but Remus was very aware of their mother being in the other room and the fact Roman tended to get louder when talking about something he was passionate about so they shushed him and made a point of reminding him of where they were.

Eventually Remus was able to escape back to their room and that's when they fully allowed their walls to crumble.

The reality of what the disastrous dinner conversation meant hit them full force and for the first time in a while old urges began to plague their mind.

They collapsed into their computer chair and sobbed silently into their hands, a skill they'd had to learn out of necessity many years ago due to various things.

The little voice in their head they thought they'd finally managed to silence began whispering and Remus clenched their hands into fists in their hair, trying their best to ignore it as it seemed to get louder.

The temptation to give in was overwhelming as the fact they could never safely be their true self around their parents began to really sink in. Then a small spark of hope hit them as they remembered someone who had always been supporting them and fighting their corner, no matter what.

Logan.

In a last ditch effort to rid themself of the old self destructive urges they sent Logan a message and filled him in on how dinner had gone.

It didn't take long for Logan to respond with an optimistic message about getting them out of there as soon as possible and reassuring Remus that their name was just as beautiful as their last and that their father was being an asshole.

Remus felt slightly better but their thoughts were still spiralling and they couldn't ignore the awful feeling welling up inside them as a question filled their mind that they had no answer to.

Why can't they accept me?

They sent Logan this question, still wiping tears from their face as they waited for his response.

Logan replied and Remus scowled, ignoring the fresh tears that spilled down their face as they told Logan that he couldn't promise that they would accept them eventually, that's not how life works.

Logan tried to bring up the fact that Remus's parents had accepted their sexuality but Remus scoffed and pointed out that the real reason their parents had 'accepted' their sexuality is because they were with Logan so for all intents and purposes they could kid themselves that Remus was straight as they were with a guy.

Logan told them that they'd do anything and everything they could in the future to use Remus's name around them as much as possible until they couldn't help but use it themselves.

Remus didn't think that would work but didn't say that, instead choosing not to reply as they couldn't think of anything else to say. Instead they began blasting music at full volume to try and drown out their thoughts.

They lost themself in their music and even began drawing, an old coping mechanism they rarely used anymore but it was a much healthier one than the one they were trying their hardest to ignore.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next few days seemed to pass without much incident, the explosive dinner being forgotten and ignored by everyone as if it never happened.

Of course it was all Remus could think of as they went through the motions of everyday life, wincing every time Patton called them Remus instead of getting the warm feeling of validation because they were terrified their father might get angry again at the reminder.

There was a moment when Remus was trying to escape to their room and their father wanted them to come back downstairs and so he shouted "Oi! Woman!"

Remus felt a wave of revulsion wash through them and grit their teeth to fight down the urge to scream, instead standing at the top of the stairs and answering like nothing was wrong.

As time passed the intrusive thoughts seemed to increase in regularity, every trip downstairs they had thoughts of throwing themselves down them, washing their hands they held their hands under the hot tap as long as they were able and sometimes out of nowhere the urge to scratch at their skin until it bled would overwhelm them.

They managed to fight through these situations by reminding themselves of Logan and their friends but there were a few close calls where they only just kept themselves from doing anything.

It didn't help that it was starting to get closer to the time of year Remus dreaded most.

Christmas.

They loved winter but Christmas and all the things that came with it was a nightmare.

It was a time they couldn't help but associate with awful times.

So many years they'd spent in their room crying over some sort of family crisis or just generally feeling unwanted and they came to hate it more and more as the years went by.

This year would probably be just as bad as ever as things had really took a downturn this year.

Losing people was never easy but Remus seemed to lose everyone around this time so there were various dates they dreaded in November and December.

It was also the time of year their mental health always plummeted and intrusive thoughts of times when they'd almost succeeded with something drastic were plentiful.

They didn't remember the exact dates of those moments but they didn't need to.

Luckily they had Logan and Virgil and Janus to fall back on. Without them Remus dreaded to think what might have happened.

They were in a better place mentally now than they had been and they had several coping mechanisms in place that were relatively healthy.

Nothing particularly big happened in the next week or so but there were a few small instances  which did start to add up, causing Remus's stress levels to reach almost breaking point.

They felt frustrated and ashamed that such tiny things could effect them so much and though they tried their best to ignore the minor inconveniences they started to pile up.

It started with a simple thing. Remus's parents suddenly started to buy a different brand of soft drink than usual due to price which was all well and good but Remus was used to the other one, the cheaper one tasted Wrong and Different and they felt slightly on edge.

The next thing was bigger and pissed Remus off a considerable amount. Their mother was already wrapping things for Christmas for their two youngest brothers and she had as always gone overboard with three black sacks full of wrapped gifts which she then handed to Remus.

"Wait what?" Remus asked, having zoned out midway through the conversation and making their mother huff in annoyance.

"I said go put these in your room somewhere Patton won't find them."

"But I don't have anywhere to put them!" Remus exclaimed indignantly and frowned as their mother raised her voice angrily.

"Where else do you suggest they be put? There's no room in mine and your dads room, Romans room also has no room and they can't stay down here. Just clear up some of the junk in your room and you'll have plenty of room."

Remus growled and muttered under their breath and reluctantly dragged the bags up to their room where they turned in circles in a frustrated moment of panic as they struggled to figure out where they could put them.

Despite what their mother had said they didn't actually have much room and while their room wasn't spotless it wasn't a complete mess like both parents liked to claim, it was just a very lived in space.

Eventually Remus ended up shoving the bags down the end of their bed and decided that if Patton saw them when he did his usual thing of bursting into their room then it wasn't their fault.

Still the bags at the end of their bed made them feel restless, the unfamiliar objects invading what they had considered their safe space but even without the bags of presents Remus was struggling to consider their room their safe place with each passing day.

The next change was a very large one. Despite only having it for two years Remus's parents had decided to get a new couch which had thrown Remus into a spiral of thoughts, none of them good. The different couch was larger than their previous ones and meant that when it came time to put the tree up there wouldn't be room where they used to put it, yay another change!

It would have to be put in front of the living room window where it would be very easy for Patton to bump into it and smash the glass decorations.

This thought sent Remus down a dark path of imagining laying in the wreckage of broken glass.

They shook this off and tried their best to stay as together as possible.

This worked slightly until the day the new sofa arrived.

Everything was hectic and there was lots of shouting from both parents which resulted in Remus falling back on an old coping mechanism.

To avoid breaking down in front of either parent Remus shut off their emotions. Or at least enough of them so they didn't end up crying.

The issue with this particular coping mechanism was Remus found it difficult to go back to 'normal' so to speak.

They were sort of glad that they were still able to block their emotions when their help was demanded with the tree.

The various decorations their mother had collected over the years usually would cause a torrent of various emotions but they remained rather unaffected through the whole process.

The snide comments and little digs barely registered as they monotonously helped decorate the tree.

The final decoration to be placed on the tree was a new one as it was every year due to family tradition. This year however it was a tribute to their mothers mum who'd died a few months back.

Their mum was instantly in floods of tears and Roman placed a hand on her shoulder, looking close to tears himself.

Remus watched as the decoration was placed on a branch and both clung to each other, teary eyed and sniffing.

Remus blinked a few times to try and escape the numb state they'd managed to get themself in but it was no use.

Their father in a rare moment of understanding gave them a small nudge and then lifted their hand and placed it on their mums shoulder.

They left their hand there for a few seconds before patting awkwardly, completely out of their depth right now. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next few days they found themselves incapable of getting out of bed. They were tired all the time and would drift in and out of sleep throughout the day, only getting up to do housework.

Their thoughts were full of worst case scenario and thoughts of what they'd do if they didn't have Logan and Virgil and Janus.

None of them were good and all their thoughts seemed to have become twisted and dark.

It was reaching a point where even talking to their friends and Logan was becoming difficult.

They knew that isolating themself from such supportive individuals was a bad idea but they couldn't seem to stop. There were no brakes on the self destruct train.

They were managing to refrain from various things but as the month of December progressed they knew it would only get harder.

Tag List under the cut:

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[penebui]

Lgbt manga pt.1

If you had to put up with my sorry ass for a few years then yes you know that I have been searching for lgbt mangas!! I put up with the pain of going through most genres that sexualize/fetishize gender identities and sexualities (like yaoi and gender bender) and reading mangas to find if they have lgbt content so you dont have to suffer the pain of trying to! Clown on this post and please face my wrath

Keep in mind that these aren’t in order of ratings!! Its just a list. I also give summaries of the plot, the things that make it lgbt, and some content warnings!! 

1. Welcome to Room #305! by Wanan 

Kim Jung Hyun moves into an apartment (room #305) with a friend of a friend, named Kim Homo! Who (you guessed it) is gay! As Jung Hyung begins to live with Kim Homo, he slowly learns to accept him for his sexuality. Once he overcomes his homophobia and completely accepts him for who he is, other lgbt characters pop in too!! They all have their struggles with their identities, and it is very realistic, but the art style helps keep all that angst at bay! As far as english translations go, we have several lesbian characters, and a trans guy. You can read the english translation on several manga sites, but if you want the link to the original since this is a webcomic, here’s the [link]! Unfortunately english updates are very slow since translation teams have other projects, and legal companies who translate take their sweet precious time. 

2. Bokura no Hentai by Fumiko Fumi

The title might seem misleading, however it can be translated as “Our Transformation”! Buckle up buttercup cause this manga will fuck you over emotionally. Three crossdressers meet up after being in a crossdressing group, with different reasons as to why they crossdress. Parou crossdresses to fall in love with a straight guy, Marika is actually a trans woman, and Yui crossdresses as his dead sister to “help” his mother with her grieving. There are some other characters who don’t fit within the gender norms! 

Now let me tell you if you are dealing with some trauma and can’t handle very sensitive topics, this manga might not be the one for you. Although it isnt just homophobia and transphobia, it also contains content of sexual harrassment, pedophilia, and suicide. However these topics are not glorified or sexualized. They are trauma of some of the characters and they must learn how to overcome from it individually. However, there is a happy ending for them!! Please let that be known! I enjoyed reading it if sobbing your heart out counts as enjoying it, because it has indeed pulled my heart strings (although I am not a trans woman, I am a trans guy and I can identify with only some of the things Marika goes through, as trans women go through different experiences than trans men and have it harder on them.) 

3. Hourou Musuko (Wandering Son) by Takako Shimura

This manga is one of the most well known mangas realistically depicting trans identity. It became popular when an anime adaptation came out! However the anime adaptation only covers the middle school part of our protagonists lives, however it encourages you to read the manga to find out what happens to them and their life! We have two protagonists. Shuichi who identifies as a girl, and Yoshino who identifies as a boy. Shuichi is the primary protagonist while Yoshino serves as a secondary protagonist. 

This manga also realistically depicts how hard it is for transfeminine people to come out and be themselves while transmasculine people seem to have it easier (dont clown on this dear fuck). We have lesbian, gay, and genderfluid characters galore! Although they do have some touchy topics like transmisogyny and transphobia in general, it is less heavier than Bokura no Hentai.  

Some people might not like the outcome of this story when it comes to Yoshino, however I am content with it because it shows that people should be able to explore their gender identity, and they are welcome to change it anytime as they see fit. Sometimes you won’t figure out your identity if you don’t explore. 

4. Shimanami Tasagore / Our Dreams at Dusk by Yuhki Kamatani

Also one of the more well known ones, the mangaka of this beautiful story is X-gender and asexual! It follows the protagonist, Tasuku is contemplating suicide as rumors circulate that he is gay at his highschool (he is). He sees a woman jumping off a building nearby and runs to her aid. Her name is Anonymous/Somebody and she sees herself is asexual but other than that she does not like labels, she invites Tasuku inside the building she just jumped off, which contains a group of exclusively lgbt characters. 

We have both trans, lesbian, and gay people. We see their struggles. We see how they overcome it. We see how even we ourselves can harm others even if we’re both lgbt. Of course there is homohpobia, transphobia, etc. however it is all handled perfectly and we get the satisfaction of these characters speaking up for either themselves or for each other. I also love Anonymous simply because she doesn’t like labels and chooses not to use them (excluding the asexual part). Not everyone whos part of the lgbt community has a label, however they are still a part of us! 

5. Fukakai na boku no subete o (Fukaboku)/ Love me for who I am by Konayama Kata

Fukaboku is a very special manga to me, as it goes in depth on gender identity and sexuality. There are two protagonists, Tetsu who is a cis guy and supposedly straight (we later find out that he is not), and Mogumo, who is both intersex and nonbinary. 

Tetsu works as a chef at Question Cafe, and everyone employed in fanlations are called girlyboys, however in the official translation they use otokonoko which is anyone crossdressing as a girl regardless of their gender. There are plenty of transwomen, gay people, etc.! Tetsu falls in love with Mogumo, so he isn’t straight, however he isn’t explicitly gay because he recognizes Mogumo as what they identify as, nonbinary. It is safe to say that he could either be pan, bi, omni, etc. however we can’t confirm since it hasn’t been explicitly stated.

We learn how transfeminine people have certain struggles, like shoes that dont fit them, breasts, and voice feminization. We also have a dose of family struggles when it comes to Mogumo in later/current chapters. 

Before you dm me, yes. Yes I know about the shit prequel. The prequel actually features a gay couple in fukaboku. I have read it. Reluctantly even if it was only 24 pages. However just because the prequel is shit does not mean we should cancel Fukaboku. There is a thing called being critical of the content you’re enjoying. If we treated it like cancel y because of x, then things like persona 4 and danganronpa would be cancelled, but lets not get into that. 

6. Kanojo ni Naritai Kimi to Boku by Umi Takase

I haven’t heard of this one as much as I have the others, so I was very much pleased when I heard about this! There are two protagonist (yes there are a lot of lgbt mangas with two protags I’ve noticed too), Hime and Akira. Hime has a crush on Akira, who identifies as a girl. However this manga is also realistic, as Akira doesn’t fully ‘pass’ as a girl herself. Hime wants to do anything she can to help Akira feel comfortable on her first day of school wearing a girl’s uniform. Because of Akira being made fun of, Hime shows up to school in Akira’s male uniform to help Akira in solidarity. 

Their teachers are fully aware of Akira’s situation, however instead of discriminating her they accept her. Their homeroom teacher helps Hime overcome her internal problem about lashing out at others who try to befriend Akira, and she slowly realizes that just because people can’t accept Akira straight away, they will slowly get used to her and come to terms with the fact that Akira is trans in their own time rather than have it being forced on them.

Hime and Akira make friends slowly and we see that even little things (like calling Akira cute and/or a girl) helps Akira, even if theyre small things we dont usually notice. Hime also struggles with her crush as she sees Akira as a girl, yet she cant accept the fact that shes attracted to girls. 

Although Akira doesnt feel the same way as Hime does, she doesnt just like her as a friend, but also not as a lover either. Its safe to say that these two have a quasiplatonic relationship with each other. 

7. Yuzu no Koto by Arai Shou

I have noticed that there are plenty of mangas with transfeminine characters as the focus, rather than transmasculine, so heres one for the transmasculines! Ichigo’s best friend Yuzu comes back to school, however he is enrolling as a boy! It is very humorous as Ichigo tries to understand and get used to her best friend’s new identity. Although it is slow as each chapter is a single page, it is hinted that Yuzu has a crush on Ichigo (or if thats just me squinting really hard). 

8. Ohana Holoholo by Torino Shino 

It is a story about two bi women who are ex-girlfriends, raising one of the women’s baby together as a little family! There is also an idol/actor who helps them out and visits them occassionally! If you want something warming and wholesome, this is the manga for you!! 

9. My Androgynous Boyfriend by Tamekou

Wako, a woman who works for a publishing company is in a relationship with an androgynous/genderless man! Her boyfriend wears dresses, makeup, and is an instagram model! It is not necessarily treated as crossdressing. It is handled pretty well, and the chemistry between Wako and her boyfriend is very strong. They both love each other so much and help each other with their hobbies and interests. This is what a loving and healthy relationship is supposed to look like!!

10. Inside Mari by Shuzo Oshimi

It is debatable if this is actually considered lgbt, considered the circumstances, however I put it on this list because it shows how mental illnesses and disorders really feel to the person whos suffering from it. Please read throughout this whole section to understand why. 

Inside Mari is about a man named Isao who stalks this young girl named Mari. He follows her back outside of a little convenience store, but when she turns back and looks at him he wakes up inside her body and doesn’t know how to cope with it. He tries to find Mari while putting on a facade and living as her. He meets a girl named Yori who instantly recognizes that Isao isn’t actually Mari from his mannerisms. This girl has had a crush on Mari, just like Isao. Isao tries to prove to Yori that he switched bodies, and when he goes to his apartment, he finds someone living as him, but it isn’t Mari.

The more we delve into this manga, the more we figure out exactly what happened to Mari and Isao. As Isao and Yori visit and retrace his steps, Isao gets flashbacks to memories of Mari. Isao soon realizes that he isn’t actually the real Isao, but a introject of Isao, and that Mari actually has DID because of childhood trauma. The ending is bittersweet, as Mari comes back but Isao unfortunately becomes dormant/disappears since I don’t think what happened was them merging. 

11.  Seibetsu  "Mona Lisa" No Kimi He by Yoshimura Tsumuji 

In the world, people can choose what gender they want to be when they’re 12. When they’re 14 their appearance corresponds to their gender. Hinase however, is 18 years old and they still haven’t chosen a gender. They prefer to be neither. However when their two best friends suddenly confess to them, their hormonal development suddenly starts to increase. 

Imagery and symbolism is very clear in this manga!! As we revolve around the color blue/cyan and the debate and interpretations of Mona Lisa’s gender. I’m very hopeful that Hinase will stay as nonbinary rather than choosing a gender, simply because both of their best friends confessed and asked them to become the opposite gender to be with them. It is very much hinted that Hinase will be in a romantic relationship with their male best friend however. I love this manga simply because the protagonist doesn’t want to identify as either male nor female. 

12. Jun And Kaoru: Pure And Fragrant by Neiki Zui

Jun and Kaoru have a special condition, by midnight they both switch genders. Because they both have this condition, they hang out with each other and help each other with clothing, etc. It should be addressed that these two do not have the “I wish to be a girl/boy” etc. The problem that they have though is their growing crush on each other. They are either genderqueer, or genderfluid, or whatever you prefer since it isn’t directly stated within the manga. They’re not cis or straight! It is a very fun and comedic love story and I wish to see further updates on it!!! 

13. Sakura-Chan to Amane-Kun by Asazuki Norito 

This story revolves around Sakura who identifies as a girl and Amane who identifies as a boy. Amane spots Sakura dressed as a girl and instantly recognizes her, however instead of belittling her he asks her out on a date, only if she goes as a girl. During school however, they have to pretend to be the gender theyre assigned with while not interacting with each other. 

Since there is a lot more but I dont want to break tumblr, I will be making a part 2 and I’ll post it tomorrow! 

[nights-lament]

RWBY Volume 8, Chapter 1 Thoughts and Opinions

HELLO, INTERWEBS!!! At long last, we are back with more RWBY, and with it, more RWBY Thoughts and Opinions! After the absolute roller coaster that was Volume 7's cliffhanger finale, I can not imagine the insanity that awaits us this Volume. So, without further ado, here are my various thoughts and opinions on Chapter 1 of RWBY Volume 8, "Divide"

SPOILERS BELOW:

Hmm, starting off with a mysterious woman scrubbing floors, and...wait, is that...no...

I really like the way they juxtapose Cinder scrubbing with her scratching the chair. Very symbolic.

Yick, something about organic architecture just gives me the willies. I mean, is the whale aware that they double as a building complex? Can they feel the diabolical ongoings of it's rib cage? Creepy stuff.

Oof, outright taking credit for grabbing the relic, Cinder? Yeah, no way that's going to bite you in the ass.

Oh my. Mercury, Emerald, AND Hazel have new looks this season. I'm sure I'll warm up to them eventually, but right now Emerald's and Hazel's aren't really doing this. For Hazel, the outfit is all right, but the hair is a bit boring compared to his originals. Mercury's is ok, but is it just me, or is he basically wearing Yang's V4-6 outfit? I mean, it works, but still.

"Without you, I am nothing." That...didn't sound like the first time she's said that. It almost sounds like something Salem's drilled into her head for years. Cinder may be irredeemable in my opinion, but I do love a good tragic backstory.

You know, I guess would make sense for the crater to be the slums area. Can't imagine living directly under a floating landmass would be considered prime real estate.

Ooh, this old man has badger paws. I don't think we've seen that kind of Faunus trait yet.

D'aaww, Nora gave Oscar a soft hug rather than her usual glomp. So cute ^-^

I'm interested in how Oscar not telling them about Oz is going to play out.

Ok, their is a lot going on in this bar-base worth talking about, but for some reason I am fascinated by the picture of (i'm assuming) the founders in the background. What interesting designs they have. I feel like they have a story, and I would like to hear it.

Penny's dejected demeanor is giving me all of the feels Q_Q

Not sure how I feel about the rift forming between RWBYJNRO, though I guess we'll have to see where it goes. At least we have people like Jaune playing mediator.

I will say, though, I look forward to seeing Ren and Nora apart. As much as I love them as a couple, I'd very much like to see them operate as individuals.

God, Ironwood trying to manipulate Penny like that.

And there it is. Ironwood has truly revealed his true feelings, and his motivation for his attempt to launch Atlas. He isn't making a tactical retreat in order to form a new plan altogether. He's abandoning the fight altogether, leaving Remnant to die so that he and Atlas can live. It's funny, he wanted to avoid becoming Lionheart, but he was a coward too.

"Everything that follows will be on your hands". That motherf-

You know, we don't see a lot of corpses on this show, do we? Penny got better, Amber's screentime ended as she died, Roman got eaten, Pyrrha got an express viking funeral, etc, and a lot of others were only corpses for seconds before we never saw them again. They did a good job selling how proper dead Clover is here.

Ok, I don't know squat about Hospital layouts. Is it normal to have the morgue right outside of an emergency room? I mean, I guess it saves some travel time should things go wrong, but still, seems like a great anxiety generator for the patient, especially with both rooms having windows. "That's where I'll be going next."

I like the new metal arm. The fact that you can see all of the internal stuff makes it feel like it was quickly put together for the sake of urgency, while still looking cool.

Man, that rendition of "Hero" in the background. Chilling.

Is Winter getting a new look already? I must say. I like the look of the braces, and the ponytail is a vast improvement over the bun.

JESUS H CHRIST IRONWOOD!!! I THOUGHT HE WAS GOING OUT THERE TO ARREST THEM!!! THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A PRETTY BIG FASCIST MOVE, RIGHT!? HE JUST SHOT CHAD JAMES IN THE FACE!!!

What really interests me is everyone's reactions. Elm and Marrow are incredibly shocked, Harriet and Winter share their little look of doubt, and then there's Vine who just...doesn't react at all. Either that or it's all in his eyes, which we can't really see from here. Either way, not a huge reaction from him. Methinks the Ace-Ops and Winter might be starting to doubt the horse they bet on.

I find it interesting that Salem doesn't know how the Relic works, but then I suppose it makes sense, seeing as Oz probably placed them into the vaults almost immediately after finding them, so this is probably the first time she's even seen one in person..

Ok, OP time, and buckle up, guys, gals, and nonbinary pals, because this one is going to be a doozy.

-First off, the song sounds pretty good, but it seems like it's going to go through the same cycle as the rest where it doesn't do too much for me at first, but has me headbanging like a metalhead by the end of the volume

- Mantle glitching out between peaceful and wartorn is a wonderful effect. Definitely fills you with a sense of dread.

-The individual shots of Team RWBY are absolutely gorgeous. Conceptually, it's the standard "where we started and where we're at", but the composition is worthy of a chef's kiss. I think I've found my new wallpaper.

-The Ace-Ops appearing on Clover's pin is nice, but what I find interesting is Harriet and Qrow appearing back to back, especially with Harriet looking so angry. Is Harriet going to double down on her loyalty to Ironwood and go after Qrow?

- It seems Robyn is going to be Qrow's main source of support this season, though the bars seem to suggest they might be in custody for a while.

-Oscar seems to be in Salem's stronghold, which doesn't bode well for our farmboy, also, WHY DOES SALEM HAVE DEMON WINGS!? Emerald's Volume 5 illusion wasn't this scary looking!

-I feel like their's symbolism showing Team RWBY's weapons paired together like that, but I feel like it's too early to say what of. Looks pretty, though

-Ren and Nora standing so far apart. It hurts my soul! Interesting how, while Ren looks away, Nora actually turns towards him.

-I didn't notice Winter's change of expression/outfit before passing by Weiss. She went from looking confident and slightly condescending to full with doubt.

-Not a lot to say about the quick shots of Whitley and Willow other then the fact that they both look worried. The image of the Schnee Snowflake shattering, however, is VERY interesting.

-I'm always a sucker for some good ol' chess symbolism. I find it interesting that while Salem's pieces dissolve into creatures of Grimm, Ironwood's simply dissolve, leaving him alone. Perhaps shooting a fellow councilman in the face right in front of his inner circle doesn't play out as well for him as well as he thought it would.

- Speaking of the classics, also gotta love me some reflection artwork. Watts seems to be working behind Pietro's back while Pietro (presumably) works to get Amity running, while secretly worrying about Penny, whose reflection cracks, possibly symbolizing her resolve. I worry for her.

- The snowflake turning into a flower petal in Ren's hand, while a similar petal passes Nora by. I don't know what this means, but I'm intrigued.

- It seems Ruby and Yang won't be completely be at odds, judging by the look they give each other before going into the action shot.

- Hmm, while Cinder pulls a Za Warudo on the fight scene, you can see a dejected Emerald and a pissed off Neo, still moving, among the heroes. Interesting...

-Almost as interesting as Cinder grasping her Grimm arm before being engulfed in flames. Perhaps Salem pulled a Wormtail's Silver Hand with that arm.

-Is this the first time we've seen the Staff of Creation in it's entirety? I remember wanting to include it and the Lamp in my RWBY Vol 7 spritesheet, but couldn't find any images of it's bottom half. I like the little jewel on the bottom.

-Wow, CRWBY went full Kingdom Hearts with the heroes falling through the ice, and I absolutely LOVE IT! This op has some of the most gorgeous visuals the series has ever seen.

-HAPPY EVER AFTER HAPPY? NEVER AGAIN Daaaaaaamn, that's awesome. It kind of reminds me of a line from Red Like Roses Part II, "This bedtime story ends with Misery Ever After". It's incredibly haunting.

-Almost as haunting as the sketchy art style that flashes in between the words, particularly the part that shows Penny's eyes going red before the rest of her does. Did we predict Watts hacking Penny a volume too early?

-The final shot of Crescent Rose alone stuck in the snow. Damn. The theme of this op seems to be "foreboding as all hell"

Damn. Damn! DAMN! This was, without question, the best OP RWBY has ever had. By, like, a lot. The visuals were some of the best the show has ever had to offer, the foreboding is through the roof, and the symbolism is incredibly clever. I don't envy them when it comes time to make Volume 9's, because this will be a very tough act to beat. I am so happy to have RWBY back, and I am both excited and terrified to see what this show is going to do next.

[shadows-twilight]

RWBY Volume 8, Chapter 1 Thoughts and Opinions

HELLO, INTERWEBS!!! At long last, we are back with more RWBY, and with it, more RWBY Thoughts and Opinions! After the absolute roller coaster that was Volume 7's cliffhanger finale, I can not imagine the insanity that awaits us this Volume. So, without further ado, here are my various thoughts and opinions on Chapter 1 of RWBY Volume 8, "Divide"

SPOILERS BELOW:

Hmm, starting off with a mysterious woman scrubbing floors, and...wait, is that...no...

I really like the way they juxtapose Cinder scrubbing with her scratching the chair. Very symbolic.

Yick, something about organic architecture just gives me the willies. I mean, is the whale aware that they double as a building complex? Can they feel the diabolical ongoings of it's rib cage? Creepy stuff.

Oof, outright taking credit for grabbing the relic, Cinder? Yeah, no way that's going to bite you in the ass.

Oh my. Mercury, Emerald, AND Hazel have new looks this season. I'm sure I'll warm up to them eventually, but right now Emerald's and Hazel's aren't really doing this. For Hazel, the outfit is all right, but the hair is a bit boring compared to his originals. Mercury's is ok, but is it just me, or is he basically wearing Yang's V4-6 outfit? I mean, it works, but still.

"Without you, I am nothing." That...didn't sound like the first time she's said that. It almost sounds like something Salem's drilled into her head for years. Cinder may be irredeemable in my opinion, but I do love a good tragic backstory.

You know, I guess would make sense for the crater to be the slums area. Can't imagine living directly under a floating landmass would be considered prime real estate.

Ooh, this old man has badger paws. I don't think we've seen that kind of Faunus trait yet.

D'aaww, Nora gave Oscar a soft hug rather than her usual glomp. So cute ^-^

I'm interested in how Oscar not telling them about Oz is going to play out.

Ok, their is a lot going on in this bar-base worth talking about, but for some reason I am fascinated by the picture of (i'm assuming) the founders in the background. What interesting designs they have. I feel like they have a story, and I would like to hear it.

Penny's dejected demeanor is giving me all of the feels Q_Q

Not sure how I feel about the rift forming between RWBYJNRO, though I guess we'll have to see where it goes. At least we have people like Jaune playing mediator.

I will say, though, I look forward to seeing Ren and Nora apart. As much as I love them as a couple, I'd very much like to see them operate as individuals.

God, Ironwood trying to manipulate Penny like that.

And there it is. Ironwood has truly revealed his true feelings, and his motivation for his attempt to launch Atlas. He isn't making a tactical retreat in order to form a new plan altogether. He's abandoning the fight altogether, leaving Remnant to die so that he and Atlas can live. It's funny, he wanted to avoid becoming Lionheart, but he was a coward too.

"Everything that follows will be on your hands". That motherf-

You know, we don't see a lot of corpses on this show, do we? Penny got better, Amber's screentime ended as she died, Roman got eaten, Pyrrha got an express viking funeral, etc, and a lot of others were only corpses for seconds before we never saw them again. They did a good job selling how proper dead Clover is here.

Ok, I don't know squat about Hospital layouts. Is it normal to have the morgue right outside of an emergency room? I mean, I guess it saves some travel time should things go wrong, but still, seems like a great anxiety generator for the patient, especially with both rooms having windows. "That's where I'll be going next."

I like the new metal arm. The fact that you can see all of the internal stuff makes it feel like it was quickly put together for the sake of urgency, while still looking cool.

Man, that rendition of "Hero" in the background. Chilling.

Is Winter getting a new look already? I must say. I like the look of the braces, and the ponytail is a vast improvement over the bun.

JESUS H CHRIST IRONWOOD!!! I THOUGHT HE WAS GOING OUT THERE TO ARREST THEM!!! THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A PRETTY BIG FASCIST MOVE, RIGHT!? HE JUST SHOT CHAD JAMES IN THE FACE!!!

What really interests me is everyone's reactions. Elm and Marrow are incredibly shocked, Harriet and Winter share their little look of doubt, and then there's Vine who just...doesn't react at all. Either that or it's all in his eyes, which we can't really see from here. Either way, not a huge reaction from him. Methinks the Ace-Ops and Winter might be starting to doubt the horse they bet on.

I find it interesting that Salem doesn't know how the Relic works, but then I suppose it makes sense, seeing as Oz probably placed them into the vaults almost immediately after finding them, so this is probably the first time she's even seen one in person..

Ok, OP time, and buckle up, guys, gals, and nonbinary pals, because this one is going to be a doozy.

-First off, the song sounds pretty good, but it seems like it's going to go through the same cycle as the rest where it doesn't do too much for me at first, but has me headbanging like a metalhead by the end of the volume

- Mantle glitching out between peaceful and wartorn is a wonderful effect. Definitely fills you with a sense of dread.

-The individual shots of Team RWBY are absolutely gorgeous. Conceptually, it's the standard "where we started and where we're at", but the composition is worthy of a chef's kiss. I think I've found my new wallpaper.

-The Ace-Ops appearing on Clover's pin is nice, but what I find interesting is Harriet and Qrow appearing back to back, especially with Harriet looking so angry. Is Harriet going to double down on her loyalty to Ironwood and go after Qrow?

- It seems Robyn is going to be Qrow's main source of support this season, though the bars seem to suggest they might be in custody for a while.

-Oscar seems to be in Salem's stronghold, which doesn't bode well for our farmboy, also, WHY DOES SALEM HAVE DEMON WINGS!? Emerald's Volume 5 illusion wasn't this scary looking!

-I feel like their's symbolism showing Team RWBY's weapons paired together like that, but I feel like it's too early to say what of. Looks pretty, though

-Ren and Nora standing so far apart. It hurts my soul! Interesting how, while Ren looks away, Nora actually turns towards him.

-I didn't notice Winter's change of expression/outfit before passing by Weiss. She went from looking confident and slightly condescending to full with doubt.

-Not a lot to say about the quick shots of Whitley and Willow other then the fact that they both look worried. The image of the Schnee Snowflake shattering, however, is VERY interesting.

-I'm always a sucker for some good ol' chess symbolism. I find it interesting that while Salem's pieces dissolve into creatures of Grimm, Ironwood's simply dissolve, leaving him alone. Perhaps shooting a fellow councilman in the face right in front of his inner circle doesn't play out as well for him as well as he thought it would.

- Speaking of the classics, also gotta love me some reflection artwork. Watts seems to be working behind Pietro's back while Pietro (presumably) works to get Amity running, while secretly worrying about Penny, whose reflection cracks, possibly symbolizing her resolve. I worry for her.

- The snowflake turning into a flower petal in Ren's hand, while a similar petal passes Nora by. I don't know what this means, but I'm intrigued.

- It seems Ruby and Yang won't be completely be at odds, judging by the look they give each other before going into the action shot.

- Hmm, while Cinder pulls a Za Warudo on the fight scene, you can see a dejected Emerald and a pissed off Neo, still moving, among the heroes. Interesting...

-Almost as interesting as Cinder grasping her Grimm arm before being engulfed in flames. Perhaps Salem pulled a Wormtail's Silver Hand with that arm.

-Is this the first time we've seen the Staff of Creation in it's entirety? I remember wanting to include it and the Lamp in my RWBY Vol 7 spritesheet, but couldn't find any images of it's bottom half. I like the little jewel on the bottom.

-Wow, CRWBY went full Kingdom Hearts with the heroes falling through the ice, and I absolutely LOVE IT! This op has some of the most gorgeous visuals the series has ever seen.

-HAPPY EVER AFTER HAPPY? NEVER AGAIN Daaaaaaamn, that's awesome. It kind of reminds me of a line from Red Like Roses Part II, "This bedtime story ends with Misery Ever After". It's incredibly haunting.

-Almost as haunting as the sketchy art style that flashes in between the words, particularly the part that shows Penny's eyes going red before the rest of her does. Did we predict Watts hacking Penny a volume too early?

-The final shot of Crescent Rose alone stuck in the snow. Damn. The theme of this op seems to be "foreboding as all hell"

Damn. Damn! DAMN! This was, without question, the best OP RWBY has ever had. By, like, a lot. The visuals were some of the best the show has ever had to offer, the foreboding is through the roof, and the symbolism is incredibly clever. I don't envy them when it comes time to make Volume 9's, because this will be a very tough act to beat. I am so happy to have RWBY back, and I am both excited and terrified to see what this show is going to do next.

[stillebesat]

Virgil’s Interview

Sanders Sides: Virgil, Logan Blurb: It’d been his dream to work for StoryTime! since he was a kid, and now finally, Virgil may be able to make it come true.  Fic Type: General, Human!Au Warnings: Negative Self Talk Author’s Note: This fic is actually Virgil’s PoV of Chapter 3 in my other fic The Interview.  But you don’t necessarily need to read The Interview to enjoy this oneshot. :)

Why had he ever thought this would be a good idea?

Virgil tugged at the collar of his shirt, uncomfortable in the stiff clothing he’d rented just for this interview.

He had to be twelve kinds of an idiot to believe that a huge successful company like StoryTime! would be interested in hiring him for his designs. His artistic style with its angular lines and hair-thin strokes put him fully in the opposite category from StoryTime!’s bubbly and vibrant Prince, Princess and NonBinary Royalty aesthetic.

Virgil looked up to the shining building in front of him, heart climbing into his throat once more. Sure, they said on the website that they were always open to hiring people with different visions. The fact that he’d been able to set up an interview in the first place was proof of that.

He grimaced, running a hand through his hair as he again stood to pace around the bench in the courtyard that seemed to be his new permanent home.

But what if it was a mistake? What if the person who contacted him had looked at someone else’s portfolio and then accidentally called his number instead? What if they hadn’t even looked at his portfolio at all and now he was going to be laughed out of the one place he’d been dreaming about working at since he was a kid?

Virgil paused, chewing on his bottom lip. “I got the interview though.” He whispered. “Me.” He had a chance to prove it was all worth it. He glanced at the time on his beat up phone and growled, tightening his hold on his portfolio. If he could convince himself to walk into the freaking building in the next thirty minutes that is. He could have a chance!

Virgil drew in a shaky breath. He could fulfill his dream.

If he could convince them that his designs were worth looking into. If he could show them how they could expand the StoryTime! Brand so that they could continue reaching out to the outliers and show them that they too were worthwhile. Maybe they would hire him.

Virgil bit his lip. But what if they weren’t open to such a change? What if they laughed him out of the building? These last six years of constantly drawing, experimenting on his techniques and working a multitude of dead end jobs to earn money for more art supplies and for college courses would be...a waste.

His stomach twisted, a lump forming in his throat. What if StoryTime!--no, what if Roman Prince told him he had no talent whatsoever? His knees buckled, sending him back onto the bench.

Virgil laid his portfolio on the cool granite, burying his head into his hands, struggling to breathe. What if his family and everyone online had been lying when they said his artwork was amazing? That The Prince would be foolish to not hire him? That StoryTime! would welcome him and his designs in with open arms. 

He shuddered, heart sinking. 

What if he let everyone down?!

“Are you alright?”

Virgil jerked, letting out a yelp as he tumbled backwards at the unexpected voice.

A hand grabbed onto his flailing one, preventing him from hitting the grass. “Apologies,” the voice continued, pulling him back onto steadier seating. “It wasn't my intention to startle you.”

Virgil pulled away, cheeks burning as he looked up to his rescuer. “It's fine.” He mumbled, rubbing the hand the stranger had grabbed against his pant leg. He’d only been scared half to death because he hadn’t noticed anyone approaching him. Totally didn’t make him seem like a nervous wreck at all.

The man, looking more professional in a simple white shirt with rolled up sleeves, blue geometric tie, and black slacks than Virgil ever could in a suit, raised an eyebrow behind his glasses. “I highly doubt you are fine. As it has been noted that you've been out here for quite some time.”

Virgil stiffened, glancing up to the building in front of him and just as quickly dropped his head with a groan. Why hadn’t he considered that people could be watching him from there!? He must look like quite the fool to the entire company now. “Let me guess, they sent you out here to escort me off the property?” He asked getting to his feet, cradling his portfolio in his arms. It had to be a sign. A sign he wasn't wanted here.

“You would be incorrect.” The man stated calmly. “I merely saw you pacing and thought I could offer assistance.” He gestured to the portfolio. “Am I correct in assuming you are here for a job interview?”

Virgil tightened his grip on his life’s work. “Well yeah, Sherlock. Pretty sure the portfolio gave that away.” He flinched as his response registered. “Wait, please don't tell me that you're Roman Prince, and I totally just ruined this!” His day could not get any worse, but with his luck--  

He tensed as the man smirked and adjusted his glasses. Shoot! SHOOT! It was The Prin--  

“I’m not Roman, no, but your hesitancy to enter the building makes much more sense now.” He stated, folding his arms. “He can be rather intimidating and difficult to impress in interviews.”

Virgil ran a hand through his hair, pushing his bangs back over his eyes. No kidding. He'd read the horror stories of interviews with The Prince on the forums. Hearing that they were true from someone who actually knew him did nothing for his confidence. “Great.” He shook his head. Why had he even thought he had a chance? “That doesn't help my nerves at all, dude. Why not just cut my agony short and tell me it's pointless to even go in there and face him?”

The man raised an eyebrow, adjusting his tie as he gave Virgil the once over. “I can't give a fair judgement on that unless I can see your portfolio first.” He said, holding out a hand. “May I?”

Virgil blinked, taken aback. Truthfully, he hadn’t been expecting that. He narrowed his eyes, making no move to hand over his work to this stranger just yet. “You're going to be brutally honest with me?” He asked. “No sugar coating it just so you can see me suffer The Prince treatment inside?”

“You have my word.” The man said, without hesitation, keeping eye contact as he wiggled his fingers. “I will be honest in my assessment of your potential.”

Virgil chewed the inside of his cheek, unable to find anything but sincerity in his tone. He exhaled, reluctantly holding out his work. “Alright.”

The man took it reverently and sat on the bench Virgil had been off and on warming for the past couple of hours. He gestured with his freehand to the empty space next to him. “Why don’t you sit while I look?”

Virgil shook his head. “I prefer to stand thanks.” It would be easier to book it out of here if this stranger gave him bad news.

The man shrugged, pushing his glasses up as he flipped open the portfolio to the first page, to Virgil’s resume. “So…” he said conversationally as he skimmed it. “Virgil is it? Why do you want to work for StoryTime!?”

Virgil snorted, shoving his hands into his suit pockets, wishing for his hoodie. “Are you interviewing me?” Shouldn’t the dude just flip through his art and pronounce his final judgement instead of questioning him?

“Officially? No.” He looked up, offering Virgil a smile. “But a bit of practice before the actual interview doesn’t hurt now does it?”

“I...suppose not.” Virgil shook his head, turning half away to look again at the StoryTime! building. It made sense. A warm up for when he had to face The Prince couldn’t hurt. It could even help him get his thoughts together. “Well.” He exhaled. “Cliche as it sounds. I’ve followed StoryTime! since the very beginning when Thomas Sanders just had his phone and Vine to work with.”

“That’s quite a while.” The man remarked neutrally, carefully turning to the next page, his attention back on the portfolio. “Most people wouldn’t know what you meant if you brought up Vine now.”

Virgil smirk. “Don’t I know it.” He’d seen his fair share of blank faces when he brought it up. “His videos there were cheesy but good natured. The fact that Thomas could create such a positive impact in six seconds was...well it impressed me. Honestly, those videos were about the only thing that got me through some of my darkest days back then. Still do even now.”

The man hummed in agreement. “He does have a knack for knowing how to make people smile.”

Virgil nodded, pacing back and forth in front of the man as he slowly turned the pages of the portfolio, taking more time and care to study them than he’d ever seen anyone else do. “And Thomas kept that ability when he started StoryTime! He kept to his roots, kept to the positivity, the hopeful messages and still provided quality content without compromising his values or forgetting his fans. I just…” He sat down next to the man, tapping on a stylised version of Sir Sing-A-Lot he’d drawn after watching Crofters: The Musical, making the character more willowy and angular as he bent down towards a bear cub. “I admire it. I want to be a part of it. Help others like he helped me.”

“A good goal to have, Virgil.” The man commented, fingers hovering over the drawing as he traced the swirls on the bears fur. “But you are correct on it being cliche. A lot of people have come here with similar reasons.”

Well, Virgil had never considered himself unique in that regard.

“However,” The man continued. “StoryTime! prefers to hire people with the intention that they’ll stay on. We’re a FamILY here. We support each other, and would prefer to have individuals who don’t give up at the first sign of trouble.”

Family. Virgil bit the inside of his lip. That would be nice. To not have people glaring at him when they thought he couldn’t see, purposely handing him the hardest jobs in hopes that he’d fail. “I’m not the sort to give up after one setback, sir. You can believe that.”

The man’s moving finger froze, and he frowned. “You don’t give up--” He thumbed back to the first page, pointing at Virgil’s Job History. “Yet, here, it shows that you’ve held quite the series of part time jobs in the last six years.” He said, looking up, freezing Virgil in place with his amber eyes. “Why is that?”

Virgil swallowed hard, pushing down the spur of panic as he fought to keep eye contact. He’d never considered that having so many jobs would be seen as detrimental. “I…” He exhaled, looking at his feet as he stood, running a hand through his hair. He could feel his dream slipping through his fingers. If this man thought he couldn’t make it here--- “I don’t give up.” He repeated softly, mentally cursing his coworkers for conspiring against him. “I took most of those jobs in the first place to save up for classes to improve my drawing and animating techniques.” He kicked at a tuft of grass, shoving his hands in his pockets. “It wasn’t my intention to stay with them long. They were just stepping stones to the end goal of coming here.”

The man pursed his lips, closing the portfolio. “I see.”

Virgil’s blood ran cold. Those were not words he wanted to hear. That usually meant that the person didn’t see at all. He clenched his hands, working to breathe steadily as he looked up to make eye contact with the man. 

“I am a hard worker, sir.” He stated forcefully, crouching in front of him, flipping his portfolio back open. “I don’t slack off. I don’t quit a job unless it quits me first. I mean.” He jabbed at his education. “You can see here that I graduated last year with a double Bachelors in Illustration and Animation, Summa Cum Laude.”

“So you have.” The man murmured his face giving away nothing of what he was thinking..

 Virgil drew in another breath, focusing on his work on proving that he deserved to be here for this interview. “And here. That education didn’t go to waste.” He flipped through the portfolio to a dragon made from smoke, staring out at them with purple eyes.. “It took me a week to perfect this technique.” He said looking up, the corner of his mouth twitching upwards. “I burned through two sketchbooks, singed my eyebrows, and set off four fire alarms before I could get the paper to blacken correctly and create this smokey texture..” He turned the page three more times. Showing a shadowy kitten with a ball of yarn, a war-marred prince holding a broken sword, and an astronaut in a stark white suit floating in space. “Or even this!” He flipped to a later page. “This Basilisk? The scales? Their shimmer?” He looked up, faltering when he saw the man watching him intently.

“Go on.” He prodded, leaning forward, a small smile on his lips.

Virgil swallowed, looking down at his work. “I-I went to every store in the valley to find the right composite of pearlescent ink to put on these scales.” He said, “I spent hours getting it to flow just right and look.” He tilted the page, the green scales changing to white.

The man made a noise of surprise, reaching out to take the page himself, his hand brushing Virgil’s as he tilted the picture back and forth. “Amazing.” He murmured. “A casual viewer wouldn’t know you used two different shades until they moved the page. It’s a pleasant surprise.” He looked up, adjusting his glasses. “Well done, Virgil.”

Virgil straightened, flushing at the compliment. “Uh...tha-thanks.” He said, rubbing his hand against his pants as he stood back up. He hadn’t expected the man to praise him. He’d only been trying to prove that he had the chops to do well here, that his slew of jobs weren’t detrimental to his work ethic.

“So.” The word cut through Virgil’s thoughts as the man again patted the bench. “Hypothetically. If Roman were to harangue you because there is a storyboard due in fifteen minutes for presentation and you’ve drawn the main character all wrong because the MC’s look had not been made clear to you, what would you do?” He asked, eyes unreadable as Virgil hesitantly sat next to him.

What sort of test was this? Had The Prince done this before to someone? He gave the slightest shakes of his head, trying to think of something...polite to would say. 

But niceness under pressure was not a strong point of his.

”An honest answer, Virgil.” The man prodded, leaning forward, intent on him. “Your true reaction. Not what you think I want to hear.”

Virgil hesitated for half a breath, before he shrugged. He’d already put himself on the line for this guy, might as well go down in a blaze of glory. “Honestly... I would--” he clicked his tongue. “Call him nine types of an idiot for not checking in with me sooner to make sure I was on the right path, but I’d also--” He grimaced. “Be calling myself the same names for not making more of an effort to clarify the MC’s key characteristics with him. I would make an argument for keeping the current style and if I couldn’t convince Princey to go with it...then...well...” He shrugged. He already knew from the forums that The Prince could be rather mule-headed when it came altering his vision. The stubborn Perfectionist. “If I had drawn it on the computer I would sketch a couple quick MC replacements and copy/paste. Easy enough.”

“Easy enough indeed.” The man echoed, eyes glittering as he flipped the page to a market scene like unto the one from Aladdin.  

Virgil bit his lip, unable to tell if the man was humoring him or not. It didn’t feel like it...but he’d been tricked before by people he thought he could trust.

“And if it had been hand drawn?” The man prodded, once more looking up. “Roman usually likes the first storyboard presentation to be hand drawn.”

Virgil made a face. Of course he did. “Well, it would be a nightmare to redo, but I would make it work.” His lips twitched as he ran fingers through his hair. “Though I would be calling Princey a variety of bad nicknames under my breath the entire time I was redrawing them to make myself feel better.”

The man snorted, briefly covering his mouth with his hand. “I hope that they would be creative.”

Virgil rubbed the back of his neck, chuckling despite himself. “Considering my past track record with nicknaming, I’m sure I could come up with a few good ones.” Especially if he had to redraw a whole storyboard--Virgil snapped his fingers, suddenly standing. “Come to think of it.” He pulled out his phone, scrolling through the Sk3tch app a roommate had created for him to hold his various school projects. “I actually had to do a similar scenario to yours in my second year of college.” He confessed, showing the man the mosaic of stained pictures on his phone. “Half an hour before our final project was due for presentation, a cotton-headed ninny muggins spilled their stale coffee all over my group’s storyboard we’d spent the last month working on and we had to quickly draw replacements..”

The man’s eyes lit up. “Really?” He asked sounding more interested than Virgil had expected, taking the phone from him. “I’ve been there myself.” He said smoothing down his tie as he scrolled through the images.

Been there himself? Was this guy one of the storyboard artists then? He had spoken of the Prince with familiarity.

“How did you do on this project, after the redraws, if I may ask?” The man asked, pausing on the replacement sketches that Virgil’s group had thrown together. They were much more stylized compared to the first batch, the strokes quick and more bold than Virgil preferred.

Virgil shrugged,  gesturing offhandedly. “We managed an A-.” He said trying to not sound prideful of the fact, but really, it had been a miracle after that particular disaster.

The man whistled, handing him back the phone. “Impressive. And out of the ruined ones, how many did you personally redraw?”

How many? “Uhmm.” He looked away, mentally calculating as he tapped his fingers against his thigh. “Me personally, I took around twenty of them.”

“Twenty? In half an hour?”

Virgil ducked his head, cheeks warming as he kicked at tuft of grass. Yah, not many people believed he could work so quickly. “Yes. I was the quickest at the line art in that group. The other four divided up the remaining thirty between them.”

Logan blinked, giving a soft laugh. “Once again, Virgil. Impressive.”

He really hoped his face wasn’t as red as it felt right now. “It...wasn’t...well...umm... thanks.” He hunched his shoulders. He definitely wasn’t used to people complimenting him in person and this guy had already done so multiple times and he barely knew him! 

“It is impressive, Virgil.” The man repeated, leaning forward. “Not many people here could do such a quick turn around.” He said, thumbing through through the portfolio stopping on a Sallyized version of Jack Skellington. He smirked, tapping the picture. “Nor would many dare to call Roman an idiot to his face. He could probably use more of an ego check from time to time.”

“Well,” Virgil spread his arms, offering his own smile. “I’m sure I could give Princey that ego check, if he needed it. I’m quite used to being the villain.”

The man jerked his head up, his dark eyes piercing through Virgil for what had to be seconds, but felt like an eternity.

He slowly lowered his hands under the scrutiny, eyes widening as his words echoed back in his head. Shoot! SHOOT! He hadn’t meant to reveal that!

“Your drawing style is rather unique compared to StoryTime!’s usual stuff.” The man said slowly, searching Virgil’s face. “You tend to draw in darker color schemes, use thinner lines, and showcasing typically good characters as your villains.” He said, flipping through the portfolio to point out Virgil’s Evil Princess dressed in green and black while holding a fractured scepter before turning to a thin angular baker pulling skull cookies out of the oven. “While using the typical hero shapes of circles and squares on your villains.” He gestured to a square jawed vampire, pulling children from a burning home. “Why do you think this sort of thing could be a fit for StoryTime!?”

Virgil clenched his shaking hands, hoping that this guy hadn’t noticed, even though he probably had. “Well…” He drew in a shallow breath. He could save this. He could save this. Just draw the man’s attention away from his personal statement. Easy.

He took another shallow breath. “There’s... been a surge in people empathizing with the bad guys recently. Wanting to know their backstory, see what caused them to go...well... bad.” He said, moving to cautiously sit on the bench next to the man. “Even Disney’s caught onto that fact.”

The man hummed, tilting his head. “Go on.”

Virgil licked his dry lips, leaning closer to the man in order to flip to his later works that better showcased his series of misunderstood villains.

While he had included the more typical fairytale ‘happy’ artwork to show he could be versatile, it was rather obvious his main inspiration came from more of the Nightmare Before Christmas, Coraline, and Corpse Bride though a discerning eye would see the influences of Disney’s underappreciated Post-Renaissance Era as well.

“You can see it with Disney choosing to retell Sleeping Beauty with Maleficent’s backstory as the main focus.” He said, gesturing to his softer smaller version of her in dragon form, curled around a broken spindle. “They already have firm plans to do a similar thing with 101 Dalmatians and Cruella and maybe with Ursula in The Little Mermaid or the Evil Queen in Snow White. It’s a trend that StoryTime! should jump onto and take charge of.”

Virgil tapped his portfolio empathetically as the man stayed silent. “Because no one and I mean No. One. Else. is better at turning tropes on their heads than StoryTime! is.” He pointed to the building. “From the very beginning, you’ve twisted plots into unexpected directions, created morally grey characters that the audience should expect to hate, only for them to come out of the theaters ardent supporters of them, praising your plotlines and attention to details and I...”

He looked up to see the man staring at him with a fond smile and jerked his hand back, self conscious on how he’d been blabbering on.

“And you?” The man asked in a gentle tone.

Virgil looked away, placing his hands in his lap. “And I think telling stories from the villain's point of view could be StoryTime!’s next big break and…” He bit his lip, taking a steadying breath as he looked back up. “I would love to be a part of it, if given the chance.”

The man nodded thoughtfully, slowly closing the portfolio, holding it lightly in his hands as he stared at StoryTime!’s front doors.

Virgil fidgeting at the silence, sensing this pseudo interview was over. Had he proven himself to this guy? Had he shown that he had the chops to do well here? Or had he just confirmed he wouldn’t make it? His stomach twisted as his doubts came back in full force. 

“Well?” He asked, unable to take the quiet any longer as he held out his hand to take his portfolio back. “Do you think I have a chance in my interview with Princey?”

The man made no move to return his work. Instead he slowly looking up, meeting his eyes. “Virgil.” He said quietly. “I’m going to have to say-”

His heart sank as Virgil braced himself for the rejection. This was it. This was the moment he was told it was all for nothing. That he had wasted his time. That--

The man gave him a warm smile. “That you’re hired.”

Logan’s Pov -The Interview: Chapter 1  Chapter 2  Chapter 3  Chapter 4  Chapter 5

Taglist in Reblog

[mondaynightmami]

Hello, excuse the vulnerability bitte. first off i needed to say that non binary means a bunch of different things for different people, the experiences of two individuals who are both nb certainly vary you don't always need to thoroughly understand them and that's alright, it is what it is. Not that I don't appreciate and understand asking around out of genuine curiosity, i've been there. i am there, and thank you sam for answering with patience and so kindly-

Now, hi again, I'm not a lesbian, i'm bi. But I am also afab and very much dealing with gender shit on the daily it seems most days. Let's say I'm not someone who is (or has ever been) uh in the best environment to explore gender and sexuality. It's why i need to look for community outside, online yknow. That being said, out of everyone, nb lesbians have helped me out a ton in understanding and accepting myself i love you all so much you deserve the world.

I have a lot to ask you, specially on the identity label 'nonbinary', on social presentation, shit on Everything, but i'm scared of coming off as rude or insensitive some times. I'm not saying this to put pressure on you at all btw, i just look up to you. I look up to a lot of out and proud nb & trans folk. I sincerely think y'all are some of the best voices and representation the queer internet space has to offer.

you let me see a person who's living happily and being greatly themselves, which goes against everything i've been told for years and that has held me back painfully. I appreciate you speaking on it. thanks. I love you.

first of all, this well and truly warmed my heart. if being out & open about my identity helps someone else then it makes it twice as fulfilling for me. also, yes! my experience as a non-binary person could be wildly different to another’s, and they’re just as valid. i can only ever give my point of view based on my own life.

exploring your relationship with gender can be difficult and nerve-wracking, especially if you have people analysing your every move, and coming to terms with your identity can be a slow process. i was questioning for about a year and a half before i felt comfortable identifying as nb! i am always, always happy to answer questions regardless of how they’re worded (unless ur a cis person just trying to be rude in that case i have no time), even moreso if it helps you in some way.

i appreciate this so, so much. you are so insanely wonderful, i love you.

[jellydishes]

dragon age characters as gods: origins edition

the first post in this series, which ironically covers dragon age two characters, can be foubd here

the warden is not actually the name of one god, but a title shared among a group, and their individual origins’ differences impact the way their stories are sung or whispered. they are just as often worshipped as psychopomps, carriers of the dead to the afterlife, as they are a source of comfort and guidance for those who had to grow up too soon; whether to war or illness or abuse or the loss of a parent or a thousand other personal stories that can fit within two syllables. warden. guard and guardian, those who sacrifice everything in order to carry the hope for others. how much more can i give? ask the weary and the grieving. “always at least once more,” say the wardens. “one more inch, one more battle. and then one day you will look up to see you have walked a thousand miles in single steps.”

in many ways, alistair fits what some call the classic ideal of a demigod; an isolated youth spent unknowing of his true parentage, one that made him humble and hungering for true respect. many turn to him for this reason alone, including orphans and the abused. many more sing his name in the dark times of their lives because of what came after that- a lifetime living with a brain that operated just a few steps to the left of the rest of humanity. a life filled with doubt and grief and loss, one filled with moments in which he could have given up. but he didn't, and he didn't, and he kept on finding beauty amid the horrors of war and the heartsick times of rebuilding that come after. “it seems so much easier to lie down and die,” he whispers to those who chose him, “but there is work to be done, and you can do it. but not alone. you are never alone where i can walk with you. when you chose me, i chose you. you earned a hand in the dark. all you need to do is reach out and hold tight.”

morrigan is a goddess in flux. in one aspect, she is a goddess of magic and of vengeance, of turning your pain outward to protect yourself when no one else can, has, or will. some say the doubters are the hopeful who've had their hopes dashed time and again, and that both is and isn't true with morrigan- she would insist to anyone who cared to ask that hers is the domain of realism, of looking at a harsh world and seeing truth. all the same, morrigan looks kindly on abused children and adults, on the lonely and broken hearted. she is a goddess who will rarely reach out first, until she knows she can trust there to be someone ready to catch her, too. in her second aspect, morrigan is the protector that she never had: a mother. she has learned that trust now, if has yet to lose all of the wariness that came before it. that wariness bleeds away when she recognizes one of her own, one she might not walk in front of, but has no issues walking beside. “the world may not be brighter for my presence,” says morrigan’s voice at her pilgrim’s ear, “but i will ensure that the night’s terrors have good reason to fear us back. it is my turn to give back the courage you kept inside, the same way i did. you have me, and i have you. that might not seem like much, but i would say it's a damn good start.”

leliana is yet another goddess who is underestimated by many. she's seen as a minor deity favored in the cities and temples belonging to the rich and comfortable, which she often is. however, thinking that is all there is to one who began her existence as a death goddess would be a mistake, one that some only made once, many years ago. as harsh and unforgiving as the smiles she was often depicted with used to be, these days leliana has grown to value finding the small joys in life when others would become bitter and withdrawn. of enjoying the creature comforts, of loving to sing and dance and marvel at the beauty of a shoe or a creature often ignored or considered a pest. these two aspects are not mutually exclusive- leliana lives in pain borne just as she is in pain transformed, as many of her faithful do. “not everything must be an uphill battle,” softly calls leliana’s warm voice. “being kind, and extending a hand with outstretched fingers can be an act of courage, when all you want to do is form a fist with it. take a breath when you're going through your darkest hour, maybe two, and come out singing with me.”

sten is a deity that many find frustratingly inscrutable, if not impossible to understand. his is a religion that seems to be very rigidly bound to duty and rules and observances and a hierarchy that dominates the conversation of almost everyone who comes across him or his worshippers. and to many, that is all there is. it takes a very determined soul to grow to understand that there is a sort of comfort in routine, in knowing what is expected of you and who you are, in knowing exactly who you can turn to if you question or need help. in sten’s service, you are considered to be undertaking a journey to understand the world in which you live, either writ large, or your own. rigidity can bring comfort, confidence, and a chance for many who had been lost to breathe. it is discovering new things, change, spread out to a pace that is less overwhelming to many for whom change in routines or simple fear would make it daunting. he approves of surpassing expectations, of growing within a box that used to bring you comfort before seeking out one that you yourself have picked out that means you. those with borderline personality disorder and autistics and the abused are common worshippers of him, and he extends a hand right back, just within reach. “i cannot pull you up,” he would say in a voice that sounds as sure and solid as the sun, “i cannot reach for you. but i am here as a wall to brace against whenever you have need. and in return, you remind me why i have respect for the lost and the heartsick. together, we will find better ways to be.”

wynne is a quiet diety, one who seemingly performs the functions expected of her and little else, but in truth wynne simply works in quiet ways, helping to inspire quiet victories over troubles large and small. it is known that in her own legends she was a prisoner for many years simply because of a trick of birth. that she lost and lost and lost again, all of her life, and had been tempted to give up just as often. and yet, wynne never gave up on those around her who couldn't speak for themselves. the children and the dead and those who had become too traumatized or afraid to lift their voices any longer. wynne is a warm presence for prisoners and the institutionalized and the disenfranchised just as often as she is for the physically and mentally disabled, and those with any sort of neurodivergences in general. she understands, whispers her worshippers, and she still, always, loves you. “i cannot save you on my own,” she whispers back to those who call her name. “it is up to you to take the first step and the last and all of the ones in between, but i will be right beside you with my hand in yours. together, we are stronger for each other, and that is how it is meant to be.”

zevran is dismissed but many who don’t care to look beyond the stereotypes assigned to both him and his worshippers as a harvest deity, one associated with sex and death and glorying in temporary joys. some do indeed turn to him for such things, but that only behind to scratch the surface of all that zevran and his worship are and have become. zevran does indeed preside over death, but just as often the deaths he presides over are more alike to changes. endings that lead to new beginnings, or how one can gradually move from being locked a suicidally depressed state into a journey towards recovery. the death of who who no longer wish to be, and the birth of who you wish so much to become. as often as he is depicted as smiling atop the coins that are both his symbol and currency, his worshippers know that smile to be a sad one, and press that currency into the hands of the abandoned souls who most need it. the orphans and the slaves and those lost to the ravages of their own neurodivergences/trauma. he looks kindly upon those who struggle with relationships ships of any kind after a life where that always meant danger. “life is full of risks,” he murmurs to an orphan warily eyeing their new foster family. “it is up to you to decide whether those risks are worth it, but you cannot say ‘no’ forever, or one day you will look up and you will be surrounded by high walls with no one left to hear you on the other side, save for me. let me help you, the way others helped me. the way you helped me, and we will emerge from this together.”

oghren is defined by contradictions. many see him as a simple god of drink and revelry and battle, of simple pleasures that exact simple joys and sorrows. however, as with many from his pantheon, that is not nearly all ghay he is. oghren is, first and foremost, a god for those who grieve and those who are afraid. those who turn to alcohol or drugs or other addictive behaviors in order to cope with a life that took and took and took from them, with a life where they are deeply unhappy. he does not judge those he presides over, no matter how often they backslide or break something that may never be fixed again. “you're mine, and i'm yours,” he says to the suffering in a gentle voice many wouldn't think he had. “and that means that i will stick by you every time you can't reach where you want to go. and you know why? every time you can't quite make it is proof that you can come this far, and can do it again. you are mine, the heart of my own heart, and i will stay with you for as long as you need and want me to. know that i am proud, and that together, we will see this through.”

shale is an impatient deity, and one with no patience for insincerity or creating and spreading cruelty. transgender and nonbinary people in particular turn to the steadying presence of shale in their lives, as do prisoners and the poor imprisoned by society into overwhelmingly literal chains. her comfort can be a stirling thing, as all of her tales whisper of how she moved from one prison to another and so learned distrust and fear externalized as anger. but so, too, did she learn compassion. shale listens just as deeply to a prayer by a child sentenced to prison for a crime that they had no chance to avoid, as she does soldiers who know that the acts they will commit will be frozen in time in their memory. “everyone is born in a box,” shale tells those who ask for her watchful gaze to settle over their shoulder. “it is inevitable that eventually you will grow and change, where the box will not. it will grow uncomfortable, then stifling, and then a wound. i cannot give you the key, because you already have it. the only thing to do is to stand beside you, ready to catch you if you fall, to steady you as you feel the turning of the world beneath your feet again. i cannot bear this for you, but i can make sure that you do not have to be strong all the time. not when i can give you the time and safety to put down your burdens for an hour, a night, a day. breathe, because you can. because you must.”

loghain is an old god, and his stories changed along with the shifting values of the societies around him. as they did, his devotion to duty above all else fell out of favor. instead, the tales took on a darker tone of disloyalty and treachery. kingslayer, they called him now. even so, voices still called out to him. soldiers and conquered people, children who have seen war and the furious, wearied people those children grew up to be. “the beat of your heart is the lifesblood of everything that defines you,” says loghain’s voice from between the clench of your fist. “stronger than blood, stronger than love, stronger than your very bones. do not give it up, or everything you have seen and done will be for nothing. do not give up. i am the hand on your shoulder, the hand clasped in yours. comrade and father and traitor, i am what my duty needs me to be and so are you.”