#arseface

[riddlegecko]

i think i've mentioned this before, but truly, learning about older(???) fob memes has wrecked me. i love this ain't a scene, it's an arms race, but i cannot listen to it with a straight face anymore bc now i know about "i'm a little man, and i'm also evil, also into cats". that has been living in my head rent-free since i learned about it, and i can't unhear it whenever i listen to the song.

[wp100]

the only title that matters in Fable is 'Chicken Chaser'

[puranami]

✿ It's The Little Things ✿

A/N: My first time writing! Admittedly I'm very nervous, but also so excited!! Kept it simple with a small headcanon list to start, but I tried to write a decent amount for each point, and I hope that everyone is in character :0 Posting at 4am because I have no control over my life...

Summary: Little relationship things with the Strawhats. Can be interpreted as the anime/manga or the live action version of the character.

Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Nami, Usopp, Sanji

Content: SFW, G/N reader, slightest hint of angst in Sanji's part, but otherwise, pure unadulterated fluff! ✿

(Part 2 - Buggy, Shanks, Mihawk) (Part 3 - Franky, Robin, Law, Kid, Killer) (Part 4 - Crocodile, Rosinante/Corazon, Doflamingo)

Luffy

✿ He absentmindedly draws shapes on your leg, back, or whatever part of you is there as you sit together, whether you are watching the waves, or listening to one of Usopp's stories. He is almost magnetic in the way he ends up attached to you. If you're not feeling it, he will do his best to keep his hands to himself, but as soon as his focus shifts onto anything else, they're back on you, drawing little clouds and hearts. He tried, he really did!

✿ This bottomless pit inhales food like it's going out of fashion, but, much to the bewilderment of the rest of the crew, he will actually feed you from his plate as he eats, even though you are eating your own food. It may be a case of "1 for you, 5 for me," but it's almost instinctive for him; he's sharing something he's passionate about with you, and making sure that, in his eyes, you are happy, healthy and strong. He values your wellbeing more than food; you are one of the most important things in his life.

✿ Despite how chaotic he is in every aspect of his life, his presence brings you to a state of complete peace, even when he's yelling about whatever currently has his attention. Just knowing he is there comforts you in a way that nothing, and no one else can. As long as Luffy is there, being the same old Luffy he always is, you know everything will be alright in the end, and if it isn't alright, well, it isn't the end yet.

Zoro

✿ He always places a comforting hand on your head when he passes by, or ends up in the same general space as you. It's his version of a hug, a reassuring touch that he is there, and that he's happy to see you. Zoro is very subtle with his affection, at least in public, but even when it's just the two of you, he automatically defaults to the head pat. It comforts him as much as it does you, and the simple action alone conveys his feelings far better than he ever could with words.

✿ You both love silently observing everything going on around you, and it's such a comfortable silence. You just enjoy each others company while watching the world go by, with Zoro also keeping an eye out for any threats, as he does. Sometimes you end up passing silent judgement on what you see, and you have both developed this uncanny ability to gossip without saying a single word. It's honestly unnerving at times, but you are just so familiar with each others micro-expressions that it's second nature.

✿ Insults are terms of endearment. If anyone else called either of you such things, all hell would break loose - swords drawn, blood spilt, bodies hit the floor, the whole song and dance. It actually started out as a form of deflection, with both of you being far too stubborn to admit any feelings were there, even to yourselves; "No, I don't like you, shitstain, I tolerate you." - "Whatever helps you sleep at night, arseface." As you connected though, it just became your thing, and you love seeing who can come up with the funniest insults. Zoro is surprisingly creative in this regard.

Nami

✿ Nami has a habit of fixing your clothes and hair if something is out of place. It can seem overbearing to others, but she knows you appreciate the gesture. She spent years putting up walls to defend herself, and this is a safe way for her to have a little moment alone with you, giving you gentle little touches without revealing to the world just how important you are to her. It is a very grounding experience for both of you, and you end up doing the same for her on the rare occasion that she isn't completely flawless. She may purposely put things out of place so you have the opportunity to fix something too.

✿ She has an eye for the finer things, and loves getting you little trinkets, and especially pieces of jewellery, which often match or pair with hers, like pendants that fit together to make a whole shape, and such. Just don't ask her where she got them; "Shhh, you don't need to worry about that." All that matters is that you now have a tangible connection to each other, no matter how close, or far apart you are.

✿ Another person who relishes in comfortable silence. Of course you love chatting with each other, and often do so later into the night than you intended. Nami is very quick-witted and your shared snark is always so enjoyable! But it's the moments when you are doing your own thing together, basking in the warmth of that closeness that brings the most joy. Every so often, you will share something interesting or amusing, depending on what you're doing, but you always return to that silence. It's very domestic.

Usopp

✿ You both end up in regular fits of giggles, that grow into raucous laughter, before devolving into the sounds of various suffocating wildlife, which only fuels the hilarious fire. He doesn't even have to say anything at times; he just has a look, and as soon as he catches your eye with it, you absolutely lose it. The amount of nonsensical inside jokes you have is absurd in itself.

✿ Ever the storyteller, Usopp will wind down the day with you relaxing under the stars, telling you fantastical stories about the impossible feats of the great 'Captain Usopp.' His creativity and imagination are something you greatly admire, and as much as you try to stay awake to appreciate those qualities, the comfort he brings has you dropping off every time. He'll carry you to bed most nights, but sometimes he can only manage to drag you around like a corpse he's trying to hide, and he'll end up waking you up laughing about it.

✿ You automatically link your little fingers whenever you are close enough to. It doesn't even register half of the time, only realising when you need that hand or try to go your separate ways. When this happens, providing there isn't anything that needs your urgent attention, you like to dramatize your parting, playing up that this is the most painful moment of your lives! "Don't you dare let go, Usopp! We can both make it out of this alive!" - "I'm so sorry, I can't hold on any longer, and I refuse to drag you down with me." - "No! Don't say that!" - "I love you so much, but you need to let me go..." Leading to you unlinking your fingers, and exaggerated fake cries of anguish. It annoys everyone around you immensely.

Sanji

✿ You shamelessly flirt with each other, making everyone around you uncomfortable, groaning at how painful it is. You weren't together when you started playing this romantic game of chicken, giving back everything Sanji threw at you, and then some, but once you figured your feelings out, you actually developed it into a legitimate game where you attempt to be as sickening and obnoxious as possible. If there is no one grimacing, angrily telling you both to pack it in, or simply leaving the room; you aren't flirting enough. There is a points system, and you're currently in the lead. Sanji ends up caving over the things you say, and his brain loses the ability to form words, let alone string them together in a coherent sentence.

✿ Sanji always leaves a drink and a bite to eat for you to wake up to, since he isn't there in person, having to wake up much earlier to prepare the food for the day. Growing up in a restaurant, early starts are just part of his natural rhythm, so it doesn't bother him, but sometimes you try to wake up with him to at least watch the sunrise together, before going back to bed for a couple more hours. He cherishes those mornings, and there is always an extra spring in his step on those days.

✿ He takes every opportunity he can to share a glance and a warm smile, a gentle touch of your hands, or a chaste kiss with you. They are agonisingly brief moments, but Sanji needs them to get him through the day, otherwise he would just cling to you, and neither of you would get anything done! Unknown to you, these moments are also his way of reminding himself that you chose him over everyone else, that he is loved unconditionally, and that he is enough, without having to, in his opinion, burden you with his insecurities. He'll open up to you one day, and you will be able to give him verbal affirmations along with everything else~

[scrumpy-swillin-scotsman]

say a bad word

Wha’ are ye, five? Fuck off why don’t ye, ye wee bawhuffin’ arsefaced cunt o’ a dobber, how’s tha’?

[theangrykimchi]

“What happened?” Arthur asks again when Eames reaches out for the bandaids and another tube of ointment for his stitches, and he’s half-expecting him to evade his questioning again, to turn it into another bout of flirting or bickering. Eames uses a Q-tip for the application, stroking a finger down the side of the small wound. His silence lasts so long that it frankly starts to annoy Arthur.

“Last year, we worked a gig with Moreau – do you remember Moreau?”

“The French guy? The lousy extractor who’s always trying to feel me up?” Eames huffs in annoyance. “Can't believe you remember that arseface and not me, I'm shaking my head at you, Arthur.”

“Perhaps he's more memorable than you, Mr. Eames. I did have to break three of his fingers last time we worked together.” Arthur's smiling mischievously, sending him a playful look.

“One day, I'm going to bite those dimples off your pretty face, just be warned,” Eames grouches.

Read on AO3

Explicit, ongoing

[kineticpenguin]

A friend and I were playing Helldivers 2 and we agreed that the Breaker helmet looks absolutely terrible.

"It looks like a bad prop from Star Wars." "It looks like someone took the Buttface guy and ripped off his buttface cheeks so he's just got a buttfacehole." "Oh my god it's Arseface" "Starwarseface"

[asaltyrat]

Fable 4 - A Frightening Proposition

Fable has always been one of my favorite gaming franchises.

Ever since Peter Molyneux introduced us to Lion Head Studio's Crasser Parody of Albion, I was immediately hooked on every little aspect. The gameplay was simple and satisfying with the staples of Melee, Ranged and Magic being there for players to utilize without any limitations.

The morale system was campy but serviceable and novel for the time, with no glaring defects with how it worked and operated. It was a mechanic that did what it said on the tin, If you do good, you get a little halo, if you do bad, you sprout horns and become generally more evil looking.

Fable would go on to mature over time, with Fable 2 being my favorite entry in the series, doing a lot of what Fable 1 did and put in exciting and interesting features like online co-op and mini games galore. (Plus an excellent dog to accompany you on your adventures, and that was genuinely lovely.)

However as jaded as Fable 3 made me, the story telling for all three games was spot on. It was comedic, painfully British and witty. It was the perfect Parody of an RPG in every way, down to the last nook and cranny. This is, however, what brings my worries.

On April 16th, 2016, Lion Head Studio was dissolved, Good Ol' Peter Molyneux went on to create a quirky, but ultimately doomed "Godus" and made people wonder about a strange magic cube you could tap on your phone. With the studio dark and Microsoft owning the rights to fable, my favorite action RPG was cast adrift in a sea of 'Maybe So' after a quirky brief teaser at 2020's Xbox Live Showcase. We got to see a fairy get eaten by a frog in a very tongue in cheek (Pun? Maybe?) way of saying "FABLE IS BACK BABY!" before we heard nothing for another four years.

Now the stagecoach driver is Playground Games, who's stellar track record is... Forza. Well, the game is off to at least a pretty and polished start. Forza's a solid racing game with some of the best graphics and simulations in the industry. An RPG it is not, however, and the Forza series isn't exactly known for it's stellar story line or quirky comedy. That's about when my potentially unfounded fears began.

Fable is only half gameplay and graphics. The charm of the game is what got me into it in the first place. It was surreal, grim, silly, and strange with titles like "Chicken Chaser" and "Arseface" being utilized by townsfolk and dark and sinister cults making poker and bingo nights on Fridays. They might worship a decaying old God of malice but they're still human after all (Virgin Chicken Sacrafices in all).

This year came about and we got two gorgeous trailers featuring a retired, jaded hero and a farmer who thinks he's better than any hero. The graphics are incredible and the voice acting is exactly on par. The two snippets into this new fairy-tale inspired world got my spark and excitement up but, really? Will any of that flat, English wit carry over into the games? I hope so, I can't wait for some piss-drunk commoner to call me Chicken Chaser incredulously after I killed a giant wasp that was about to murder him.

Just Albion things.

Stay Salty~

[blazevillains]

hello arseface

only singles allowed on my page today sorry

[villainessbian]

This guy is a tailor, and has made long twitter threads explaining tailor things. He notably explained how poorly Trump's clothes fit him, which has sent many MAGA types into a crying marathon.

Of course, Republicans being absolutely unable to be normal about anything, they have this whole thing where many of them think clothing and appearances are for women to care about, so a MAN who knows things about CLOTHES has to become an enemy or something. They're weird.

in the first picture, holly/girlziplocked apparently commented on that. Being good at clothes makes someone a lot less likely to be a MAGA arseface. In the second picture, T.R./dripchud says something to the effect of "no, I'm MAGA and so so cool" - to which in the third picture derek guy/dieworkwear, the cool tailor, lays a bomb, which is that T.R./dripchud (1) doesn't dress well, (2) was arrested by the FBI for dressing so poorly he was easily recognised for participating in the 6th of January insurrection, (3) used to look up to derek guy/dieworkwear, but (4) got angry and started insulting him and calling "thin skinned" because he got blocked by dieworkwear, which the kids call "cope."

Then another waste of air tried to save face by saying that talking to the cops isn't cool, and dieworkwear just linked to another tweet by that same waste of air admitting to the intention to commit a crime, and mentioned the police. Because fuck these guys.

That's not exactly par for the course for derek guy/dieworkwear, but he's managed some impressive clapbacks over idiots over time

the wildest derek dieworkwear series of events so far and that’s saying something

[k-i-l-l-e-r-b-e-e-6-9]

Arseface,1996 by  Glenn Fabry

[zippocreed501]

Preacher

[skullpizza]

I finally did the #SixFanarts challenge!

[matt-at-pencils]

Preacher

[quenoseperdio]

Preacher S02E11

[towritecomicsonherarms]

Green Lantern: Arseface By BoredRobot

[demonlady]

DON’T WATCH PREACHER

Preacher promo pictures for season 3

Funfact:  After some religious groups started attacking the show, the creators came up with the perfect idea to promote season 3