#are you SURE cause apparently you don't even realize when you're still talking to me!

[dragonlights]

Me: hey mom can you not make your anxieties my problem? I'll encourage you to talk to others and help you reach out however you want, but I can't be the one to help you, it stresses me out and given my childhood it's upsetting.

Mom: doesn't stop, keeps going "what if this happens, what if that happens?"

Me: answers her questions and says "I don't know though, that's just in the hypothetical you came up with" *leaves bc I'm stressed out about having to deal with her anxieties Again*

Mom: keeps! Going! Even when I turn up the TV to drown her out!

Me: can you please stop, it's really upsetting when you violate my boundaries like that.

Mom: what? I was not!

Me: you were! You were yelling so that i-

Mom: I wasn't yelling! You were just across the house so I wanted to make sure you could hear me.

Me: yeah! And you were talking about your anxieties! That I've asked you to not talk about with me!

Mom: I wasn't making it you deal with my anxieties! I'm just loud.

Me: reminds her that she JUST said she was raising her voice so I could hear her while she was talking about her anxieties.

Mom: *babbles in backtracking*

[yanderes-galore]

Yandere Husk please

The request for a Sinner darling was pretty much the plot I had for his concept... so I hope it's okay I combined the two :(? It would make more sense than me repeating myself.

@okchijt helped me out with this to make sure I got the character right and filled this with good ideas ^^

Yandere! Husker Concept

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Overprotective/Possessive behavior, Stalking, Drinking, Trauma, Emotional Manipulation, Clingy behavior, Murder briefly mentioned, Blood mention, Biting mention but not done, Scenting, Dubious relationship.

For how moody Husk is most of the time, I imagine he'd care for his obsession very much.

It's said he lost the ability to love long ago... which he no doubt believes to be true for a long time.

Even when his obsession begins Husk would still be in denial of the idea.

There's no way he's feeling love towards another sinner here.

Yet here he is, worrying for you more than any other.

His obsession would be the most likely to occur with someone who's in the hotel.

So another sinner employed to help out the hotel or looking for redemption.

For the most part, Husk tends to stay out of the way and observe.

Most of his behavior is obviously cat-like.

Which means he'd keep his distance and watch you... just to see how you behave and what you're planning.

Husk's obsession is slow... gradual.

It's not like other yanderes who feel an immediate spark only for it to grow.

He watches you for a bit... Then slowly talks to you over a drink, then you become close.

His mood can put people off.

He's always drinking, always grumpy, apathetic, and gruff...

Yet he really does like to listen to people and help.

In that case... I can imagine one of your bonding times is opening up over a drink.

Maybe you're anxious about the hotel or some other thing.

The cat's good at listening... soothing your nerves with a drink and advice.

You'd swear he's the hotel's therapist more than the bartender.

However...

A good drink certainly would start a bond between you two.

Observant and empathetic... Husk would care for you once he shows some interest.

It's certainly not romantic immediately to him...

But it is a curiosity.

He's patient with you and often knows if you lie to him.

Which at first is revealed by something innocent... like you trying to hide some problem you have.

Yet that ability can turn sinister later on... like if he feels you're lying to him about something to distance yourself from him.

Husk is said to be sweet and protective of those he likes.

Naturally, as a fellow sinner in the hotel, Husk often keeps track of you.

He looks forward to sharing a drink with you or playing a game of cards.

You don't even have to trauma dump on him, he enjoys your casual conversation in his normally dull day.

He doesn't even realize he enjoys your company so much until someone, maybe Angel, points out he's purring when he sees you.

This would probably occur within a couple months.

You two often chat as you work and get along pretty well.

Better than he thought apparently if he's purring when he sees you.

He can't seem to help it...

You just stir something in him... It's familiar but... it can't be anything serious....

Husk is a subtle yandere for a couple reasons.

One reason is he's in denial of being in love for a long portion of his obsession.

He often tries to rationalize with himself that he just sees you platonically.

That he's just a shoulder to cry on....

Another reason is this... Even after he comes to the conclusion he does love you...

There's Alastor.

Husk's soul is still owned by Alastor, the radio demon is his master.

He can't show his love for you much as he fears Alastor will pick up on it.

The last thing Husk needs is causing you more stress because Alastor needs leverage against him.

Such a thought forces him to keep his obsession over you out of sight.

Both out of shame and fear.

Doesn't stop him from accidentally dropping hints, though.

When you two talk in private, or even in public and he lets his guard down too much, you can hear Husk purring around you.

He denies it the whole time, of course.

When alone, Husk tends to be more affectionate once he accepts he's in love.

However, he excuses it to try not to give himself away.

For example, if you're having a stressful day, he may hug you and start purring.

When you question him, he claims he's just trying to get you comfortable.

After all, did you know a cat's purr supposedly eases the mind?

In reality... He's trying to excuse his urge to touch you... just to keep up his facade.

So you'd just keep venting while he nuzzles into you to "cheer you up".

Apparently....

Husk is limited in his obsession.

Kidnapping and physical isolation would draw too much attention.

Alastor would definitely find out then.

Although... Emotional dependency and social isolation?

He can make that work.

In fact, making his darling dependent on him is core to his yandere tendencies.

It's easy since you already come to him for help anyways.

He wants to be the only one you're vulnerable around.

Husk wants you to seek him out for help, comfort, and company.

Perhaps even love eventually.

Making you dependent on him makes you his... Yet keeps Alastor out of it.

... Hopefully....

Because you vent to him, Husk knows nearly everything about you.

More than you know yourself sometimes.

While such secrets and info would be great blackmail... Husk wouldn't want to ruin your trust.

Instead he uses it to his advantage, a way to gain your favor.

He'd use the info he gained to help you.

He knows what you like, what you hate, what situations make you uncomfortable...

He's always around and ready to tug you out of a situation you hate.

He acts like such a caring friend, he's even protective of you.

Husk may actually leave his post at the bar to follow you and check on you.

He does some stalking but has to make it subtle.

If someone was messing with you or hurting you, Husk is quick to step in.

Considering how he handled those Loan Sharks in the show...

Safe to say you're in mostly good hands.

The only time he'd murder is if your life is in danger.

In that case... Surely you can ignore the blood in his fur?

Not like it's very new to you, though....

Hell's violent... Which is another reason Husk hates you wandering off alone.

While Husk is subtle... I can see him scenting his darling in secret as he nuzzles and purrs.

He may even be into biting you... leaving marks to show you're his...

Yet since he has to be subtle, he reigns in such urges.

Overall, Husk is a subtle protective yet possessive yandere who would make his obsession vulnerable and dependent on him.

This way, you're kept safe and cared for...

All his... even if you don't know it yet.

[wcbblife]

can I make a request for juju Watkins? Maybe her taking care of reader/her gf who is also her teammate after reader has a bad game? Thank you!

Juju taking care of reader after bad game!

a/n: hopefully I can dish out some more short stories like this for you guys

To say you were having a bad game would be a gross understatement. Nearly all your shots bounced off the rim, teasing you as they rolled around before falling into your opponent's hands. It felt like every attempt ended in the same frustrating result. You could only imagine how abysmal your shooting percentage was today.

Adding insult to injury, just after the second half started, you took an elbow to the face, causing your nose to bleed instantly. Despite this, your coach was adamant about keeping you in the game. This combination of factors spelled disaster, but apparently not to her.

Now, you were counting down the minutes until the end of this miserable game, eager to retreat to the locker room and remove the cotton pads shoved into your nose to stop the bleeding.

You felt terrible watching Juju carry the team on her back to secure the win for the Trojans. Normally, you two were a formidable duo, averaging impressive numbers against opponents. Yet today, you were practically invisible on the court.

“Hey! Listen to me!” Your coach yelled in the middle of the huddle. “Juju and Mack have done a great job securing the win for us, but that doesn't mean we can slack off! You need to start making some shots.” She turned to you, putting you on the spot. You tried your hardest to nod, tilting your head back as a staff member swapped out the blood-soaked cotton in your nose.

“Coach, I think you should put Kayla in. She's a hot mess right now,” Juju interjected, seeing you preoccupied with your own problems. “Just until the game ends.”

“Kayla's in foul trouble. One more and she's out.”

“She's bleeding,” Juju fired back, taking a big gulp of water. “She shouldn’t even be here.”

“Juju, we’re short on players,” your coach responded, scribbling something on the board.

“Then Kayla better not foul,” Juju said sharply, shooting a look towards the guard, who straightened up and nodded fervently. It was clear she had been waiting all game for a chance to play, and you weren’t going to stand in her way.

“Just do it,” you winced, tapping the hands of the medical staff who were inserting another cotton swab into your nose. You couldn’t believe it was still bleeding. “Put her in.”

“Alright,” your coach sighed, finishing her explanation of the play she wanted to run after the timeout. You relaxed, finally turning to face the staff.

The rest of the game flies by in a blur, your focus consumed by the throbbing pain in your head. You only realize it’s over when Juju comes to help you into the locker room, her strong arm around your waist.

“Thanks,” you mutter, sounding a bit nasal, as she sets you down on your designated bench.

Juju tilts your head towards her, examining your nose. “You might've broken it, babe.”

“I sure hope not,” you wince, gingerly touching the area. “Thanks for what you did back there.”

“Of course,” Juju says, sitting next to you and throwing her arm around your shoulder.

“And for carrying the load. I totally sucked today,” you chuckle.

“Don't even say that. It wasn’t your fault at all.” 

“Yeah, except for me throwing bricks the entire first half. I don't even want to see the stat sheet,” you shiver just thinking about it.

Juju pulls you closer, “You're being too hard on yourself. Plus, it always feels good to be the hero,” she says, puffing out her chest with mock confidence.

“Right. Well, anyway—”

“Hey! You have media to take care of.” Suddenly, a staff member interrupts, practically separating you two. “Just you, Juju.

“I'll be right there,” she calls out, then turns to you. “Go ahead and ice that. We'll talk more when I get back.”

“Alright,” you nod, watching her go before turning to tend to your injury.

_____

It's not until you get on the bus that you finally get Juju all to yourself. She finds you in your usual spot, a familiar corner of the bus, and walks over with a loopy smile, sleepiness already starting to take over.

“Hey,” she calls softly, setting her bags down and taking a seat next to you. “Sorry I took so long.”

“I hate having to share you,” you joke, but you don’t miss the sigh that escapes Juju's lips.

“I know, babe.” She gently pulls your head to rest on her shoulder. “You need some rest though.”

“I want to talk to you.” 

“I want to talk to you,” you insist, despite the fatigue weighing on you.

Juju cups your jaw, a bit awkwardly due to your position, but her touch is comforting. “I’ll sleep over,” she promises, her voice soft and reassuring.

That simple assurance is all it takes for your eyelids to grow heavy. You let yourself be lulled to sleep by the gentle hum of the bus engine, feeling the warmth of Juju’s presence beside you.

 Juju’s hand strokes your hair lightly, a soothing rhythm that helps you relax even more. Her soft breathing, the gentle rise and fall of her chest, and the warmth of her body next to yours provide a sense of peace you desperately needed after such a shitty game. 

_____

“Gosh, I’m gonna look so bad tomorrow,” you wince, poking at your nose.

Juju shuffles in from the room next to the bathroom, her sleepy eyes locking with yours through the mirror. “Babe, you’ll be fine,” she assures you, handing over your toothbrush. She squeezes out some toothpaste before grabbing the other brush you always kept there for her, and does the same.

“What if it looks like a tomato?” you ask, staying motionless as you imagine the worst.

Juju finishes at the sink and wraps an arm around your shoulders, meeting your eyes in the mirror again. “I’ll help you ice it. But you have nothing to worry about. You’ll still look sexy to me,” she says with a loopy, pasty grin, pushing the toothbrush closer to your mouth.

“You promise?”

She nods, “Yup, but I really need you to brush your teeth.” You follow her lead, brushing until your breath feels minty fresh.

“C’mere,” she says, pulling you by the waist and guiding you both to the bed. Your bodies slot perfectly against each other, fitting together almost naturally. She pulls the blankets over you both, cocooning you in warmth.

Juju's fingers trace gentle patterns on your back as she speaks, her voice soft and soothing. “You know you’re being too hard on yourself. Today was just one game.”

You sigh, the day's stress beginning to melt away in her arms. “I know, it’s just… I hate feeling like I let everyone down.”

“You didn’t let anyone down. We win as a team, we lose as a team,” she reminds you, pressing a kiss to your temple. “And besides, you’ve got me. Always.”

You close your eyes, feeling the comfort of her touch and the steady rhythm of her breathing. 

“Let’s get some sleep,” she murmurs, her voice growing softer as she too begins to drift off. 

You nod, snuggling closer and allowing the exhaustion to finally take over. The last thing you feel is Juju’s hands pulling you closer.

[moorishflower]

Dirty Talk (Dreamling, Explicit)

This is because of @landwriter making me realize I don't have much practice writing dirty talk. This is still pretty tame in that regard.

"I don't think you're even capable of talking dirty," is what Hob says, one fine winter evening, comfortable and a bit comfortably tipsy, sat at his regular table in the New Inn with Dream of the Endless sat across from him, and he knows by the way Dream rears back like a cat whose nose has been flicked that he's made a mistake in saying it. It's only been a few months since Dream has come back into his life, since he's gifted Hob with information and explanations and finally, in the trenches of autumn as the leaves had crumpled from the trees in red and gold splendor, the rare sight of his smile and a trembling lower lip, and a soft, My friend, but in those few months Hob's come to the realization that he would do anything, literally anything and everything, to hold Dream's friendship. To make him feel safe. To keep him here.

And maybe mocking his friend's mode of speaking isn't the right way to go about it but, again, he's just pissed enough for it to not seem like a big deal, and Dream doesn't seem upset so much as he seems offended. Mates give each other shit all the time, Hob reassures himself, and it's not like they were talking about something life-changing. Dream had only been complaining about his sibling interfering with his realm, which has apparently caused some sort of imbalance in the Dreaming, and from there had followed a great lot of metaphysical and esoteric explanations that boiled down to 'wet dreams are on the rise' (pun intended). It explains why he's had so many in the past week. It doesn't explain why so many of them have featured dark hair and skin like cloaked starlight and eyes bluer than the Aegean Sea, but that's his albatross to bear, not Dream's.

And then Dream had said something along the lines of how sex dreams had used to have poetry to them, there'd been an intimate back and forth, not just of bodies but of words, a build-up and a climax. One thing had led to another, and Hob had said what he said, and he stands by it. Still stands by it, even as Dream's eyes turn flinty and the corner of his mouth turns up into a smirk that would shame the devil.

"I am the Prince of Stories," he murmurs. His voice is a laser that cuts through the raucous din of the New Inn. There's a van's worth of footballers a few tables down, either celebrating or commiserating, it's not clear which, and the entire pub is lousy with the noise. Hob doesn't have to lean forward to hear his friend, so tuned is he to that purring baritone, but he does so anyways. It gets him closer to Dream, who also leans in, like he's about to share a secret. "Do you truly believe me incapable of crafting words titillating enough to bring one to completion?"

"I don't think you've ever said the word 'cunt' in your life," Hob says, doubling down like the idiot he is. He's never claimed to be a wise man, and especially not when he's in his cups. Besides, it's the winter hols, he's got nothing to do tomorrow, and if he ends this night with nightmares that make him piss the bed he'll concede that Dream has won this round.

"You would be incorrect."

Hob can't imagine Dream ever speaking in a way that's less than dignified. There's such power to him, all the time, such staid and solemn surety, and there's no room in that sort of denseness for telling your partner how much you'd like to suck their brains out of their prick. More's the pity, because he thinks if he could imagine it, the shape of his stranger's lips around the word 'cock' would surely be a fine feature to add to his repertoire of fantasies.

It's at this point that Hob makes the stupidest decision he's made all night.

"Prove it," he says, and takes a sip of his drink, secure in the knowledge that six centuries of swiving has rendered him immune to embarrassment, even in such a public setting. There is a long pause during which the only sound is the ambient riot of the Inn around them, the clink of glasses and the cheering -- or bemoaning? -- of the footballers, the nearly-incomprehensible drone of the sound system piping Top 40s Modern Rock into the kitchen behind the bar, Marv the bartender swearing as he uncorks a bottle of champagne for a mixer.

Then Hob feels something brush against his foot beneath the table, and the rest of the pub goes silent.

Or rather, not silent, but…muffled. Like someone's draped a great blanket over the both of them, and now it's just him and Dream, as it's always been, as it always will be, facing each other across a worn, wooden table, as much of the original wood as Hob had been able to salvage. He's worked it into the foundations, into the bartop and the tables and the floor, trying to preserve the stories he'd told for his stranger, the history, like it was ale that had soaked into the floorboards. Dream's eyes are focused on him, impossibly blue, and he feels another soft touch, this time higher up his leg. Like a foot stroking up his calf, except no game of footsie has ever left him feeling this breathless before, this yearning.

"Would you have me prove it to you with words of prose, Hob Gadling?" Dream's voice is a thing with texture. It'd be prosaic to compare it to such human stuff as velvet or fox fur, but Hob's limited in his petty human understanding, and to his ears it's plush and warm and welcoming. It's a voice to bury your face into, a voice that drips down the skin like warm honey or candlewax, with just enough bite to be interesting. "Would you have me woo you with poetry? Shall I compare thee, not to a summer's day, but to the wild bounty of the fields? More comely than all of autumn's fruits and grains, thy hair rich as the loam and the fertile earth?"

Fertile is an unfair word for him to use, Hob thinks. His brain's scattered out his ears in an attempt to try and hear better, but he doesn't have a choice, because if he wants to not hear he's going to have to get up and leave. And not listening to this just…isn't an option. Not with how Dream is looking at him, head cocked like a bird and his mouth red as garnets shaping around words, words, words.

"Shall I opine about the shape of your body? How broad and virile your chest? I have seen you at sport, Hob, and I know what you hide beneath sweaters and cardigans. I have seen the daydreams of those who lust after you. They imagine you coming in from your war games, stripping the shirt from your back and drinking the sweat from your body. They imagine what it would be like to sink to their knees and bury their mouths into your most intimate places. Worshiping you with hand and tongue. Would you have me describe these fantasies, Hob?"

Oh, please, he thinks, and wonders if it must show on his face, how dry his mouth's become, how tight his trousers are now, because Dream's little smirk grows wider. His pupils are blown so large they nearly eclipse his irises, and there's only a thin ring of startling blue outlining a sea of infinite void.

"Or would you prefer it in cruder terms?" The light pressure that's been dragging up and down his leg inches higher; it feels like fingers kneading into the soft insides of his thighs, and Hob's legs fall open to give the phantom hands better access. The Inn looks and sounds like it's moving in slow motion, but maybe that's just because he can't look away from Dream.

"Would you like me to describe how beautiful your cock is?" Dream asks, and he says it with the disaffected expression of someone asking about the weather and the deep and growling voice of a jungle cat, and Hob is fairly certain he makes a noise of his own, something undignified and stifled by how quickly he bites his lip. "How the weight of it would fit perfectly in my hand? You are made for pleasure, Hob. Thick. Heavy. Better still, to hold the shape of you in my mouth."

"Oh, fuck," Hob says. He's barely aware that he says it, but Dream's eyes light up with fiendish inner fire. There's no blue anymore. It's just black, and stars, and Hob drifting in them like a rogue comet, burning up.

"Yes. I could describe how you would fuck me. How you would turn me inside out. I would want to ride you first, to see the shape of you inside me. I would want you to fill me with your spend until I could taste it in my throat, and then, when I had found my pleasure, I would want you to bear me down into the bed. I would want you to break me in half, Hob Gadling, because I will accept no less than the most ardent lover, and if I do not finish the night with your cum leaking down my thighs and my arsehole gaping for you, I will not be satisfied."

The ghost-touch that's been drifting higher and higher along his thighs presses firmly against his groin, and Hob makes a strangled, gasping little noise, swallowed up by the thick syrupy slowness of the Inn, and comes in his pants. It's an orgasm so sharp and sweet and high that it feels like the prolonged note of a flute, and leaves his thighs quivering in the aftermath, and his breath coming in heady little rasps. He hadn't even been aware he was that keyed up, but then, he hadn't been aware of anything but Dream, and Dream's voice, and now how Dream is staring at him across the way, eyes glittering like a thousand diamonds set in velvet. Hob watches as he slowly lifts his hand from beneath the table, spreading his fingers. They're covered in cum, little beads and drips of it sliding down to the second knuckle, and Dream holds his gaze like a fist around Hob's heart as he raises his hand to his mouth and begins licking his fingers clean.

There's another noise, an uncomfortable whimper, that Hob doesn't want to think is him but probably is.

"Have I sufficiently proven myself?" Dream asks, popping his fingers free of his mouth with the most obscene, wet sound that Hob has ever heard. He imagines those fingers spearing into him and making that same sound from all the lube dripping out of his arse, and Dream's nostrils flare.

"Dunno," Hob manages to say, when he finally finds his voice. It's a thready, needy voice, but it is there. "Could use some more convincing. Don't suppose…you fancy coming upstairs to continue this conversation?"

There's a gentle stroke along the inside of his thigh, making his poor, spent cock twitch, and Dream smiles at him. "Yes. I believe there is more I could tell you, Hob Gadling."

And there is. A lot more. That night, and into the morning, and the next, and the next. Hob needs a lot of convincing.

He's grateful Dream seems up to the challenge.

[watchingblsnowandforever]

Hello!!!

Welcome back to my crack posts! =D

We Are ep 9 is as hilarious as it's frustrating, and I will continue to the whys below with a healthy dose of crack. <3

Warning: long post 😊😅

Ohoho, our little boy is jealous and... its not even 5 minutes in (2 minutes since the actual start). Is that a new record?

Kluen: can I just sleep beside you- 😊

Phum: No. 🙂

Poor Toey getting roped into this too 😭

(something something, Chain helping Toey get Q jealous while Phum uses Toey as a buffer for the cause of his jealousy)

Our favourite old married couple hehe (who aren't actually dating yet-)

My poor Phum 😭

Okay, as much as I don't like Kluen, I have to give it to him for being so straightforward, going as far as telling Phum that he likes Peem when he realizes that Phum might does like him too.

Also the t-shirt: We Are Volunteer.

Yes! Call him out!

We really need more call out-ers in BL.

I laughed so hard my cat looked at me weird 😭😂

Children really are the best eyy

Phum looks so betrayed oh gods 😭

The 'I know what you're doing but I'll still play along cause I like you too, ai'kwai' look. Ah, a classic from thai bl.

This reminds me of when Tinn says "How can I be your friend? I like you!" when Gun finds him after he ran away from the MV shoot.

(And Gun replies, "You think I can?")

On one hand we have Phum who bribes children with chocolates (that he just happens to have in his pocket) to lure away his crush from his rival.

On the other we have Q who simply up and runs away when his friend faux-swipes his crush's sweat simply to make him jealous.

*looks between them and shakes head* these boys are absolutely hopeless

Our favourite married couple part 2 (who are actually dating)

continued:

Pun and Mick just here playing around 😭👍🏼

Peem was right, if they were the only ones in charge of cooking, no one would get any food T~T

But... how exactly did "cut into round shapes" get converted to "cut into round glasses" to "rectangles"? 😶

Fang is so done with these idiots 😭👍🏼

In this moment, I kid you not, my brain played the "what did he sayyy" meme 😶

Phum: *bombastic side eye of death*

Yes, please. We've been waiting for this for 8 and a half episodes.

Yes, and you are the nosiest peep, now continue.

Ah, so Fang is actually the violent sibling, and him and Phum (and Tan, apparently) got into frequent fights, it seems like.

Got caught red handed 😭

Tan is so dead

Wait... so Tan and Fang had a beginning much like Phum and Peem? 👀

Rivals to lovers for both brothers it is, then.

And I feel so bad for Phum, poor guy has been a third wheel since his high school days 😭

...somehow, I think Chain and Pun will put even TanFang to shame when they actually start dating 😶

'Course you have. You just played with water with your besties the other day

And with friends like yours, Peem? It's unlikely you'll go one day without playing around with something or the other

Beer doing God's work here 😭🙏🏼

I love how Beer is both perceptive and observant of his friends, and knows just what to say to get them moving.

He wants the best for Phum and even tells him how he's happy that Peem came into his life, and Phum is a lot more lively these days. (MSP flashbacks again anyone? No? Just me?)

He might not be as playful or enthusiastic as Peem's friends, but he knows what his friends need and he'll try his hardest to make sure they have it. He's just such a good friend.

Phum telling him about the Deal™ also shows us just how much he trusts Beer.

Love him <3

Sweetie, I understand you need some space, but you don't talk to your future boyfriend possible crush like that 😭

Nothing to see here, just a goodnight kiss.

Jokes aside, I like that Peem tries to figure out what's wrong, but he doesn't push too hard. And even tries to provide some comfort to Phum.

And in these moments with just them, Phum has bursts of courage to show his affection, and show Peem how much he means to him, instead of just telling him.

I don't think this is him being emotionally constipated (he is, no doubt about it, but strangely not as much when it comes to Peem), but more of him being unsure of where he stands with Peem (as I mentioned in last week's post).

Are they just friends because their friend groups merged? Acquaintances forced to be close due to circumstances? Just creditor and debtor? Is the deal all that's holding them together?

Well, Phum needs to find the answers. (Preferably and possibly within the next episode)

*sigh* they're gonna kill me with fluff (and I'm gonna die happy)

This is my favourite scene of this ep. Just crushes cuddling each other with sleep, the rest of the evil world (Kluen) forgotten for the moment.

Ah. I love cuddles even more than kisses, not gonna lie

Also, ep 10 seems promising!

Anyways, that's all for now, see you next week! And if you made it this far, thank you so much for reading! 😊

Here, have a bubble tea and a cookie 🧋🍪

[jupitersfall]

cate hc’s? 😁😁 with a fem!reader who has water powers, and maybe they met in class instead of her and luke yk

Cate Dunlap Headcanons !

you met her in mr. brink's class when you sat next to her

mainly cause you didn't know anybody yet and you didn't want to look dumb sitting by yourself

but also cause you thought she was pretty

when class started, you realized you had forgotten a pencil

so you had to ask cate for one

which sparked a conversation

because who could be dumb enough to forget a pencil on the first day of class?

you, apparently

after that, the two of you continued to sit next to each other

and eventually became each other's first friend

loser!cate hehehe she's cute

over time you realized your feelings weren't so platonic

cue awkward flirting and shy giggling

staring at her while she talks about stuff cause when did she get so smart? when did her voice get so soothing?

cate didn't find out about your powers until she'd spilt her water bottle all over your notebook

gaping at the water as it floats off the table and into the air

she thought it was so cool though

making her favorite animals or different shapes out of water to impress her...

or so you could see her smile

who said that?! not me

one day you guys are talking in your dorm, and she mentions luke and all the sudden you're like what?? fire?? you like fire???

feeling very betrayed after 😞

jk lol but you were definitely a little bitter

"water is, like, way better than fire, you know. i would totally beat him in a fight."

like four months of pining later, and then the two of you are at a party, and you're a little too drunk, and cate is looking a little too pretty

and the two of you are alone, and she's staring up at you with those pretty blue eyes

and all of the sudden, you're leaning in to kiss her like you've done it a million times before

you were pretty sure it was just the alcohol in her system, because cate kissed you back

and then again, and again, until the two of you were making out in the back of this party, hands wandering over clothes like you were starving

the next morning you woke up in your dorm with a killer headache, and cate was beside you, drinking a cup of coffee and scrolling through her phone

"hey, finally. i was wondering when you were gonna wake up. don't worry, we didn't sleep together."

good, you wanted to be sober for that

but there was a long talk after, which didn't help your headache

after that day, the two of you were closer

it was a very unspoken change

you weren't sure why, but it didn't matter to you

you still got to kiss her, and touch her, and be with her

you didn't know when you became official, that had been pretty unspoken too

you only started noticing differences when girls would actively avoid you

jordan was the one that brought it up

"you're like a human magnet except you repel every girl at this school."

you go walking off to cate to ask her about it, cause who else could be the reason?

she acts innocent at first, all doe eyed and confused

"what're you talking about? maybe they just dont want to get in the way of us."

but she's got that sly little smirk on her face, and of course she'd be the cause

"i'm sorry, i'm sorry. i couldn't help myself, i thought it was funny. ill stop, though. promise you're mine?"

and of course you said yes. how could you even think about another girl when she's right in front of you?

not possible

anyways she's my baby

[k-nayee]

Lashes Kim Line + Jungkook

wc: 1.7k

Dreamer M.List

ˏ⸉ˋ‿̩͙‿̩̩̥͙̽‿̩͙ˏ⸉ˋ‿̩͙‿̩̩̥͙̽‿̩͙ˏ⸉ˋ‿̩͙‿̩̩̥͙̽‿̩͙.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .‿̩̥̩‿̩̩̥͙̽‿̩͙ˊ⸊ˎ‿̩̥̩‿̩̩̥͙̽‿̩͙ˊ⸊ˎ‿̩̥̩‿̩̩̥͙̽‿̩͙ˊ⸊ˎ

𝐘𝐎𝐔 stumble into your bedroom with a tired sigh, body sagging in exhaustion from working all day.

"Hey baby," The sound of your lover's voice reaches your ears as you finally kick off those dammed heels, "tough day?"

You could only let out a dry laugh at his question. "Yeah, you could say that. Was this close to finally beating Mal's ass though."

Already knowing who you were talking about, he chuckles. "That lady from HR? What she do now?"

Rolling your eyes, you walk towards the closet, giving him a quick peck on the lips before continuing on. "The bitch gon have the audacity to make the only unit consisting of Asian and Black people do a racial diversity and inclusion seminar due to the complaints of microaggressions being made."

If it weren't for the frustration laced in your voice, the stiff and rough movements of you changing into comfier clothes made it apparent of your anger.

Knowing its best to just let you burn it out instead of trying to calm you down, he hypes you up. "You lyin! She did that? Mmmm mmm mmm! Trifling as hell for that..."

You turn to face him with wide eyes, hand on your hips. "Right?! As if we weren't the ones who made the fucking complaints in the first place! Ended up having to do overtime to make up for the work we missed all day."

He only shakes his head in disappointment. "I'm not surprised."

"Yeah, would've been high-tailed my ass outta there if the pay wasn't too good to give up." You grumble, sliding into bed to get ready for sleep.

Twisting and turning around to get comfortable, you stop at the heavy feeling of someone gazing at you.

"Why are staring at me like that? I got something on my face?"

He breaks out of his trance and give you a sheepish smile. "I just realized you still had makeup on. You sure you wanna sleep in it?"

A moment of silence pass before you let out a groan. "Damn! Forgot I had some on. Was so tired I skipped my whole night routine."

Throwing the off the blankets with a sigh, a pout appears at thought of being in the bathroom longer than you wanted.

"You know...I-I can help. Especially since you don't wear that much makeup."

You freeze at his proposal, eyes narrowed at the pros and cons.

"And you'll be done much faster~"

At those words, you immediately give in. "Okay I guess"

"Yes!" He jumps up in excitement and scurries after you like a lost puppy. "So what I'm gonna do? Will I put on the face mask? Rub in your face serum? Ooo! Can you do me too—"

"Wooooah! Slow down! We taking one step at a time. So to start, you can help take off my eyelashes."

SEOKJIN

The excitement he had in the beginning quickly faded away into nervousness once he was actually doing it.

"Okay...so...do I just—"

"Yes Jin. For the last time, I promise it doesn't hurt when taking them off. Just use the cotton ball I gave you, put some coconut oil on it, and wipe it on my upper and lower lashes."

'Oil? What if she get some in her eyes? Is she sure about a cotton ball? Won't a q-tip work better?' Despite being confused and having many questions, he carefully follows your instructions.

Ten minutes pass of him slowly dabbing at the glue that's on your real lashes to ensure everything will come off.

Even though you're touched at how careful he's being, your fatigue causes you to become impatient, lips pursed to prevent yourself from cursing him out.

Right as he's done with the first eye, you step back with a bright smile. "Alright! I can take it from here babe."

Jin looks at you in confusion, though internally happy with no longer having to do the next one. "But I didn't get to the second o—"

"Don't worry about it! You did so well I realized how bad I usually do it myself. So Imma start practicing," spewing out the first bullshit that came to mind, you push him out the bathroom door.

Jin could only blink, raised hands still holding the cotton ball and removed eyelash. "O-okay. Let me know if you need help with—"

"Won't be necessary. See you in a little bit!" Before he could get another word out, you shut the door in his face.

∘₊✧───────✧₊∘∘₊✧──────✧₊∘∘₊✧──────✧₊∘∘₊✧───────✧₊∘

TAEHYUNG

"Okay Tae, all you gotta do is put some oil on the cotton ball, rub it on the lashes, and viola~ them bad boys coming off."

Taehyung could only narrow his eyes at the instructions. "Why can't you just take them off? I saw you do it before."

You scratch the side of your with a sheepish grin. "I did do that huh? Okay, let's just pull 'em of—"

"Aight, bet." Just as he finish those words, he reaches up and rip them off.

Mouth gaped open in shock, your mind tries to process what just happened. It wasn't until Taehyung's poking broke you out of it.

"Motherfucker! You almost pulled out my real ones!" You exclaim while rubbing your eyes.

He visibly deflates at the realization at what he'd done. "Sorry, I was too excited."

Seeing how genuine he was, you decide to forgive him.

"You know," as he continues to pout, you discreetly pick up the eyelash glue and another pair of lashes, "I can put some on you if ya want~"

Perking up at the sight of the materials, Taehyung's excitement appears. "Really?! Can you get me some bigger ones while you're at it?"

"Alright, but you have to hold still if you want me to do them right."

He scrambles to the toilet seat and sit down with no hesitation. After minuets of constant scolding to get him to stop squirming, you're finished putting them on.

"All done!" With a clap of your hands, you step back to take in the final result.

'Damn! He pretty as fuck!' You almost couldn't believe how good he looked with them on, a twinge of jealously shooting through your mind at how natural it seemed.

"Soooooo...how do I look?"

Shaking your head to get rid of the jealous thoughts, you look at him with giddy smile of your own, pulling him up to the mirror. "Why don't you come see for yourself?"

A low gasp of awe escapes the vocalist as he studies the long lashes on his face. "This. Is. So. COOL!"

Bouncing on his feet in excitement, he runs out of the bathroom with a big smile.

"Wai-where are you going?!"

"Oh nothing..." He pokes his head back into the bathroom with a mischievous grin. "Just finna go fuck with Yoongi and give him some butterfly kisses."

"See that's why you keep getting your ass beat! You know he hates it when you mess with him."

"Nah, he ain't gonna do shit. Besides, I'm too cute to get hit" With an air kiss and a flutter of his lashes, he runs out of the room once more, "toodles~ be back in an hour."

"This dumbass right here!"

∘₊✧───────✧₊∘∘₊✧──────✧₊∘∘₊✧──────✧₊∘∘₊✧───────✧₊∘

NAMJOON

"Um ____?"

"Yes Joon?" Back facing him as you collect your cleaning materials, you're unable to see his fidgeting.

"Are you sure you want me to do this?"

You let out a small laugh and turn towards him with a smile. "Of course! Now come here so you can help."

With small timid steps, he's finally in front of you.

"Now," you lift up the bottle of coconut oil and a cotton ball, "all you need to do is put some of this oil on the ball and wipe it like this."

Carefully wiping some of the oil on your upper and lower lashes, you wait a moment and simply pull the lash extension off. "And tada~ As easy as pie. I took the liberty of doing one for demonstration. You think you can do it?"

Seeing how simple the action was, Namjoon gives a dimpled smile. "Sure, of course."

"And to lessen the pressure, I'll have my eyes closed." Following through with your words, you close them. "Ready when you are..."

Namjoon's nerves gets the best of him once more and causes his mind to blank out for a moment before shaking his head.

'Alright Joon, its a simple task. Just dab the eye and take them off. What's so hard about that?'

Shakily picking up a clean cotton ball, he rubs it on your lashes.

'Rub the cotton ball on the eye? Check...Now to just take it off.'

Your brows slightly furrow when he rubs your eye with the soft material. The usual feeling of the oil weighing on your eyes was absent. 'Damn...this feeling kinda dry'

"Hey Joon?"

He subconsciously lets out a hum as he continue to focus on taking your lashes off. 'Just take it off like a bandaid. Aaaaaand...'

"Did you remember to add oil to the cotton ball?"

'NOW!'

"FUCK!"

Namjoon rapidly blinks at the sound of your scream as he breaks out of his trance. "Huh?"

"Joon!" Your pained cries fill the bathroom as you hold your eye in pain. "What the hell did you do?!"

Looking down at his hand, he sees that he succeeded in taking off the lashes. Only to do a double take when seeing a smaller set with small white hair follicles attracted to the bottom. "Oh..."

....he ripped off your real eyelashes

"GODDAMITNAMJOON! YOU HAD ONE JOB!"

∘₊✧───────✧₊∘∘₊✧──────✧₊∘∘₊✧──────✧₊∘∘₊✧───────✧₊∘

JUNGKOOK

"C'mon ____, you taking too long! Hurry up!"

You roll your eyes at Jungkook's constant pestering. "Kook calm down! Just let me oil the lashes up first."

It was Jungkook's turn to roll his eyes. "You doing too much. If you just don't rip them off!"

"Rip them off?! Do it look like I wanna be bald in the eyes?"

He smacks his lips at your words. "I've seen people do it plenty of times. Just a lil pull and they off."

"Do I look like other people? If everybody else jumping off a bridge, you gonna do it too?"

"But ____!" Jungkook lets out a whine, stepping closer to you with a pout as he eyes the lashes.

Picking up on what he was going to do, you immediately back away with thrown up hands. "Back the fuck up Kook! I know what you trying to do. You rip off my lashes and imma beat yo ass."

He steps back with a sigh. "Fine."

"That's what I thought." You turn back around and grab the cotton ball and coconut oil, ready to start the process.

As you pour the oil on the ball, you fail to notice Jungkook sneaking up beside you.

"Hey ____?"

"What?"

After a moment of silence, you look at him with furrowed brows, mouth pull into a sneer of irritation. "Dude I just said what! Stop playing arou—"

"YEET!"

Quicker than you could react, Jungkook grabs both of your lashes and yank them off.

"WHAT THE FUCK KOOK!?"

He cackles at your angered expression, holding the fake lashes in his hands as if they were a trophy. "Told you they'll come off~"

You swiftly look in the mirror only to silently release a sigh of relief when seeing that your real lashes are still intact.

"You better be lucky I ain't missing nothing! Cause if I was, I'm cutting your shit off too...that and your eyebrows. Gone end up looking like Voldemort in this bitch!"

"Yeah yeah," he brushes off your warning with a flip of the wrist, "let me know when you need some more help 'kay?"

"Tough titty, cause this the last time you ever gonna help me!"

[strawberrymilk-sunshine]

What would be the aftermath after the siblings death? Like the funeral or parents reactions 🤔 -angst anon

Warning(s): very short, mentions of death, platonic yandere-ish

---------------------------------------------------

"I don't trust it one bit." Riddle said, sipping his tea. "Floyd hasn't bothered me once today. I think he may be planning something."

"Yeah, he was acting weird during basketball club..." Ace added. "Normally, even when he isn't feeling it, he'll at least pretend to participate, but today, he just sorta sat in the corner doing whatever it was he was doing."

"How odd..." Riddle said.

"Oh, you two talking about the Leeches?" Trey asked. He had been trying to teach Riddle and Ace how to get along (and how to bake) "Well, I was talking with Jade earlier, and... you know their little sibling, (Y/N)? Apparently (Y/N) hanged themselves right in their dorm room last night. I feel bad for those two... I can't even begin to imagine how I'd feel if that happened to me..."

"...yeah, we're getting permission from the Headmage to use the mirror. We're also trying to convince him to let us bring (Y/N) home, he says he reeeeeeeeally doesn't want this getting out to the public... yeah, I'll check on him... yeah, see you soon, mom."

Floyd hung up the phone. Ever since they received the news, his parents have been calling nonstop.

"Hey, Jaaaaaaaade, you're not answering your phone, so mom and dad are asking me to make sure you're doin' ok." Floyd said to his brother. "I know you're not, but y'know... thought I'd still ask."

"Just tell them I feel fine." Jade insisted.

"...you realize this's ignited a huge firestorm back home, yeah?"

"I didn't mean to kill them, Floyd." Jade said, head in his hands. "I didn't want any of this to happen."

"You didn't want any of this to happen? That's bullshit and you know it! If you really didn't want this to happen, you'd've never played that stupid 'joke' on 'em in the first place, Jade!" Floyd threw the phone to his brother. "Now call mom, she's really fuckin' worried about you, 'cause you played the role of (Y/N)'s protective older brother their whole life! She thinks you're devastated by this whole thing! But I know you're not... because I saw you hang them. If you really felt bad about killing them, you wouldn't've tried to fake your innocence."

Jade sighed and dialed the number into his phone. His mother picked up almost immediately.

They had a lengthy conversation about you.

...

It was the first time he heard his mother cry over the death of one of her children. His mother was such an emotionally strong woman... come to think about it, this may have been the first time he's heard her cry ever.

"Apparently, (Y/N) tried to call me that night... I haven't had the heart to listen to the voicemail they left me."

...voicemail?

No. No no no no no NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO-!

There's only ONE reason you would've called your parents that night; to let them know what was about to happen to you. That he was going to kill you.

"Jade...? You're very quiet. Is everything alright...?"

"Yes. Everything's fine, mother. I'm just... still processing all of this." Jade said.

Jade threw the phone on the ground the moment the call was over.

He NEEDS to find his mother's phone and delete that voicemail when he gets home.

"Jade, what was that sound?" Floyd asked, entering the room. "WHAT THE FUCK?! THAT WAS MY PHONE!!"

"We have bigger problems than that right now, Floyd!"

"I'm guessing it's just you that has bigger problems right now. Fun reminder: I'm not the one who killed our younger sibling."

"I need to get home and get rid of it."

"...get rid of what? You've killed (Y/N), you've made it seem like suicide, NOBODY thinks it was you! There's no more evidence to get rid of!"

"Apparently, (Y/N) called mother some time before I killed them! And I assume that they told her I was going to kill them!" Jade explained, looking stressed. "Luckily, she says she hasn't had the heart to listen to it, so I'm still in the clear for now. When we get home, I NEED you to distract mother and father so I can delete that voicemail."

...

"Wow. You really don't care, huh?" Floyd had some kind of hurt-looking smile on his face. "Not a hint of guilt."

"WILL YOU HELP ME OR NOT?!"

"Fine! Jeez, you're so annoying sometimes!"

The next day, the twins went home.

Both for different reasons.

Floyd went home to discuss your funeral preparations with his parents...

And Jade went home to destroy the last piece of evidence that tied him to your death.

When Jade found his mother's phone, he listened to the message you left.

You sounded so... scared.

He's always found it kind of funny, hearing the fear in your voice, but now...

Now he couldn't help but feel ever so slightly...

Bad.

After he listened to it, he had his finger over the 'delete' button. Why is he hesitating...? He shouldn't be... there's no reason to be...

He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and pressed the button. And then, the message was gone. The evidence was gone. You were gone.

Forever.

And instead of feeling like a weight was taken off his shoulders... strangely enough...

It only felt like more weight was added.

[stxrvel]

loneliness is not my thing (2)

series summary: you woke up from a long coma with no memory of a part of your life only to be told by your teammates that you're married to the man you hated seven years ago. even though that seemed to be the only problem, as time goes on you're realizing there's a lot more history and mystery behind the accident that left you in medical care for months. blackouts, more memory loss, mistrust and a strange man who seems to be connected to everything. every day it gets harder to trust anyone around you, but you won't stop until you can finally uncover the truth behind the accident.

chapter summary: a talk with Bucky could end up uncovering and unleashing that part of you that you were always trying to keep under control.

pairing: bucky barnes x f!reader

words: +5k

warnings: i think none? let me know if i should add some!

note: hey you guys!! i can't believe the love you all gave the first part of this fic, and also the love you gave to the outbreak! its surely insane. thank u all for your support, and know that i'll always try to be better and write better and just give you guys the best. i love all of your comments, sorry if i don't reply to them, but i really really really love reading them! the feedback is just what keeps me going. really thank u all 💜. as always, i hope you like this second part! let's see what comes next for pt. 3

masterlist | next | series masterlist

The road to recovery was a difficult one, and if anyone knew about it, it was definitely Bucky Barnes.

It was what everyone had been telling you since you arrived. Besides constantly insisting that you should be careful about everything you did and not overexert yourself, talking about Bucky was another thing that people around you constantly did. You hadn't said that to him the last time you'd seen him, because he seemed angry enough with what little you'd said to him without adding something to it that you didn't even know what it might add to the conversation.

But yes, apparently Bucky was quite a preacher when it came to the path of self-healing. And seven years was just too long... You would have been much more surprised if it was the other way around, that you were still two adults with the minds of children who constantly poked each other with offensive words and backbiting. Maybe thinking Bucky had changed wasn't so crazy after having a whole year to consider it. You'd never had so much silence from him as you did most of the time you were in the hospital.

You wanted to learn more about it. More about him. But you never felt you had the right time to talk to him at length. At first, yes, it was too complicated to take in what he had told you. You two, married? The worst of your nightmares. But eventually you could begin to notice the change, even though his old attitude was still fresh in your memory. Then, just when you felt ready to start trying, the others showed up.

You would never have thought that learning to tolerate people would be such a complicated task until you found yourself in that situation. You were grateful to them, of course, their concern touched you… but to what extent?

You were uncomfortable with their looks and words and, although you managed to give yourself space by letting them know you didn't want them to keep talking about you and Bucky, the discomfort never really went away. And you just couldn't deal with it anymore. Surely, that was what had caused Bucky to pull away from you more and more. You also thanked him for his understanding, but you felt the scales were very unbalanced.

When he told you he would talk to Tony about giving you more space, you took it as a good sign. You could finally have a more private space to live.

What you didn't expect, of course, was to spend a whole week in complete solitude.

You didn't know what was worse.

You thought for a moment that it would be a gradual change and not all at once, and you hardly knew how to handle it. Sometimes you would leave the wing you were settled in and walk around the Complex, hoping to find someone, but it seemed like everyone had been wiped off the face of the earth. There was no one you could meet walking around.

So, at the end of the week you wanted to talk to Bucky again. You thought being like this might be the solution, and it's not that you completely missed some conversations with others, but you did miss some social interaction, and with some boundaries you were sure you could get some good stuff.

“What the hell are you doing up there?”

Your head was up, pointing directly at the figure sitting on a thick branch of a large tree. The woman had an impassive look on her face, but you could tell you had taken her by surprise.

You were taking one of those walks that, rather than being routine, you took hoping to run into someone. Although you had the feeling that you would end up doing it as a routine. And now you were finishing, when you were walking around the green area of the Complex, you happened to look up at the sky and you found Carol Danvers in the middle of the landscape.

“I'm… relaxing,” she barely answered you, clasping her hands together and waving her legs in the air. She almost looked innocent.

“Aha,” you nodded, not quite convinced. “I hadn't seen you in days.”

“Bucky was very clear in his instructions.”

“Instructions?”

“Yeah, he was very specific in asking us not to return to the wing and not to cross your path even by accident. Very intimidating, if you ask me.”

You watched Carol frown reflexively as you weighed her response. That, clearly, answered the questions that were rattling around in your head. But still…

“Why?”

“What?”

“Why did he do that? I didn't tell him what I told him to get everyone out of my life - he didn't even tell me what he wanted to do!”

Carol let out a laugh and it was your turn to frown.

“You can't imagine the things that man would do for you.”

You sighed heavily.

“But I didn't want to be left alone either.”

“That's understandable,” Carol nodded. “It's true that we overreached. You had reason to be uncomfortable and Bucky had reason to be angry. The least we could have done was to be on our best behavior and we failed at that too.”

You processed her apology, but over analyzed her words.

“You failed at that too?”

As soon as you finished asking the question, Carol's face froze. You knew she was known for being careful with her words, and she was the only one in the whole group who could really exercise prudent behavior. She didn't like assumptions or double-talk, unless it was necessary or for a bit of fun. But on a subject like that, you knew she had to be very precise with every word that left her mouth.

So, you didn't waste the opportunity to bring it up even though you knew she would most likely dismiss the topic as if it wasn't something relevant.

“Yes, well… The accident was an intelligence error. We all got complacent, thought the mission would go excellent and smoothly. But we were wrong.”

You didn't expect her to actually give you an answer. Vague, but an answer after all. You tried to fill in the gaps in your head with the information she gave you, but besides being something completely inconclusive, it gave you a big twinge in your head, like every time you tried to remember something.

Sometimes you didn't understand how the doctor said it was possible that you could recover your memory when you faced situations like that. That headache you got when you tried to evoke some recent memory seemed like a wall of miles of concrete that you couldn't break down except with thousands and hundreds of years of hammering on it.

That's how far away and impossible it felt.

“Don't do that,” you heard Carol's voice.

You had lowered your head when you felt the sting and, as always, the light began to bother you. You didn't realize at what point she stepped off the tree branch, but suddenly you felt her beside you holding your shoulders.

“The doctor said to avoid, specifically, forcing your memories. They will come on their own at some point.”

“This sucks,” you barely mumbled as the pain began to subside. “It feels like… having someone else inside my head. My lost memories feel like someone else.”

“I get that.”

You straightened up and began to follow the path back to the Complex at the foot of Carol, who still kept an arm around you just in case. You turned to look at her when she spoke, remembering what she had told you about her past.

“At least you know what you're looking for. The road is full of rocks, but it won't be endless. At some point you'll find a river and walk right into the truth.”

“I hope so.”

“Be patient. And don't force yourself. You'll be fine.”

You pursed your lips unable to keep a feeling of disgust from coursing through your body. Carol was right, like everyone else when they talked about it, and suddenly her advice should carry more weight having been through a similar situation herself, but that did absolutely nothing to alleviate the hollowness you constantly felt in your chest.

Dealing with the situation was easier when you only thought about the present. When you thought your only problem was what to eat for your three meals a day, what movies to see, which sides of the Complex to walk on, and that was it. Everything was perfectly fine when you focused only on the problems you had in the moments instantly.

The real issue came when you had to remind yourself that you weren't living in an everyday situation.

You had an accident. You lost your memory. You spent a year in the hospital. You found out you had a husband. You went to live in a space in the Complex completely isolated to yourself because the stress of the environment there could affect you psychologically. You were constantly living your days… for existing.

Having lost your memory, in addition to taking away the opportunity to continue to grow in your interpersonal relationships, also took away the opportunity to continue working. You were a SHIELD agent, but you weren't cleared for any kind of mission until further notice. And when would that notice come? You had no idea. Basically, you were living in limbo.

You were constantly trying to focus only on the problems of the present because they were things you could more easily deal with. Maybe that's why, despite being a nuisance at times, you appreciated the company of the team. And maybe that's why at the time you didn't miss the loneliness. Not that loneliness that gave way to unhealthy thoughts and hopeless feelings instead of allowing you moments of reflection. You felt you had developed an apathy to loneliness. Or a fear… It was hard to know exactly.

But you had to merge it all into your routine at some point. Learn to deal with both at the same time. Learning to live with the fact that there were millions of things that others remembered and you didn't, while trying to live with creating new experiences to treasure.

Living one problem at a time.

“If you really feel that way, you should go back and talk to Bucky. I can talk to the others and try to set rules and boundaries.”

You raised your head to find yourself in front of the rear entrance to the Complex that Tony had set up so you wouldn't have to walk through all the clutter of agents and clerks at the main entrance. It was a black door that blended in with the rest of the wall, and behind it was a short hallway that led directly to an elevator that had only one number available to go up.

“Yes, that would be ideal,” you nodded thoughtfully, as you walked toward the elevator after closing the door. “Of all the things I could have imagined when I woke up, the least likely, almost impossible, would have been guessing my current relationship with Bucky.”

Carol barely let out a laugh as she rang the elevator with the single button to her left.

“Despite losing your memories, you're not much different than you were in the last few years. Really the only thing that changed was everything that went along with your lousy relationship with Bucky. When you two patched things up, it was like everything fell back into place. The sun came out and the birds sang.”

You laughed with Carol as you entered the elevator and pushed the button with the number five on it.

“I guess it can happen again, right?” you questioned quietly, as you ascended to the third floor.

“It's possible. But don't hold on to what was. You can also chart a new path.”

--

You felt nervous. Your mind was predisposed to disaster. You had taken chamomile tea, but it had given you nothing more than a sudden urge to go to the bathroom. Every second that passed felt like an eternity, and you couldn't conceive that you could ever feel excited at the thought of talking to Bucky. Because what you were feeling at that moment could almost be related to panic. Despite the months that had passed and what you knew of his new version, you still panicked at the thought of talking to him alone.

You had been staring at the door for a while expecting him to show up at any moment, but it felt like you had been sitting there for hours waiting for the same thing. You hated feeling that uncomfortable tingling in your limbs and the nervousness whipping your stomach with an empty feeling. You especially hated it even more knowing that Bucky was the reason you felt this way. A year hadn't been enough time to get used to the idea, it seemed, and still your mind was reluctant to accept the truth. Even though you were aware of what it did to him, what your rejection made him feel, you still couldn't put yourself in a situation other than unwilling. It was like acting against your nature.

Carol had told you that she would tell Bucky to meet you because, like the others, you hadn't seen him again either. She knew where to find him so she told you not to worry about that.

She also told you that the reason everyone seemed to have fallen off the map was because they had started having missions much more often than before. Whoever was making life miserable for them and the rest of the population seemed to have been relentless for days. Carol told you that everything had been manageable until the beginning of last week, when the attacks and disappearances had been more frequent.

She then mentioned that it was unlikely that you would ever see everyone gathered in the same room for more than an hour again, or even a small group of them.

That was all he said.

You asked more questions, like who the person was who was causing these disturbances, or why they wre doing them, but she refused to continue the conversation. She said something about stress and trauma that you could barely understand, but her conclusion was that it was the doctor's express mandate not to talk to you about work. And it seemed that especially about that person who was wreaking havoc in the cities.

The door rang when you were deep in thought.

You moved your gaze just to meet Bucky's clear eyes. A choking sensation suddenly came over you.

His gaze was not tense, as you used to remember it, and he moved his body gracefully across the room; he no longer seemed to carry the sin of the world on his shoulders. His calm expressions made you feel more at ease, coupled with what you had lived and experienced with him over the past year, but you still felt the nervousness come back stronger.

“Carol told me you needed to talk to me.”

You watched him approach without moving an inch from your place at the table, and noticed his brow furrow in concern. At some point, you would have connected that expression with anger, with weariness or annoyance, but his warm, welcoming eyes made you feel like you had no reason to feel cornered.

“Yes, uhm… I wanted to talk to you about the team.”

“What?” Bucky spoke up instantly, his brow furrowing even more. “Have they been bothering you again? Because I was very clear last time-”

“No! That's not why. That's not what I meant,” you rectified quickly when you felt his tone of voice deepen. The lightness with which he used to address you seemed to have taken a vacation when he thought your time was still being disturbed. “I just wanted to tell you that… uhm…”

Damn nervousness. You interlocked your hands under the table and clasped them tightly. You tried to keep a cool expression so as not to alert the man in front of you, and the very thought struck you as odd.

“You didn't need to ask them to leave.”

You finally spoke, and when you looked back to see him, you could make out his peculiar grimace of confusion.

“I really appreciate what you're doing for me, Bucky. It's very… thoughtful,” you would never have thought you'd say all those words in the same sentence. “But I'd really prefer not to always be alone.”

You saw how his features remained mostly intact, but his eyes gave away what was going through his mind. He still looked confused, but he was already walking down the path you were putting together.

“I know what I said. My way of expressing myself was perhaps a bit over the top. But in my defense I didn't think you were going to go and ban them all from ever coming back in. I would never have guessed it.”

Bucky sighed, and you noticed at last how he relaxed his body. Ever since you mentioned the others, his shoulders had tensed and he had leaned forward as if ready to run off and hand out scoldings.

You watched his eyes wander over the table as you two lapsed into a silence that you couldn't tell if it was uncomfortable, comfortable, strange, not at all welcome, or welcome. You had mixed feelings about how to feel in the face of their silence. God, the things you'd come to…

“Okay,” you heard him reply after another few seconds in (un)comfortable silence. “So you'd prefer to see them more often, regularly, but just be less invasive. Something like that?”

“Maybe,” you nodded. “I don't know how I used to be before the accident, but I know that right now I don't feel as willing to talk about some issues.”

“That's okay,” Bucky nodded quickly at your words. “I'll talk to them then. I'll take what you tell me into consideration.”

You mimicked his gesture positively, and gave him a tight-lipped smile.

Okay, now what?

Before your head could start making a problem from the size of a pin to the size of a mountain, Bucky took the floor again.

“How have you been feeling? I mean, physically.”

You blinked a couple of times before answering.

“I've been fine. Sometimes I get a headache, but that's when I'm trying to remember something.”

You saw him nod with his full attention devoted to you. His brow furrowed, but this time in concentration, you were sure.

“You haven't been able to remember anything?”

“No, I haven't.”

You shook your head and felt that strange hopelessness hug your chest. You didn't like to think that sometimes people lived with a conception of you in their heads that you couldn't fill. You felt that they were always waiting for something. The expectation of one day seeing you and you being that person they used to remember. It was hopeless. You thought that no matter how hard you tried, you were never going to reach that version of you that had been erased from your head that everyone was used to. Why would that happen? Even with someone like Bucky, whose relationship between the two of you you didn't remember on good terms, you feared you couldn't exceed those expectations.

“You know,” the voice of the man in front of you brought you back to the present. You shook your head to rid yourself of those thoughts and focus on his words. “If you wanted to someday, you could get out of the Complex and go somewhere in the city. Maybe meet or just walk around.”

“Can I do that?”

Bucky frowned. “Sure. Why couldn't you?”

You looked down at your clasped hands.

“I don't know. I thought part of my recovery included always being here.”

“Ah. Well, that would be the most advisable thing to do, but as long as you're accompanied by someone I don't think there would be any downside.”

“Really?”

“Sure. You can ask anyone to accompany you. We all know the city well. And if that someone isn't busy, I'm sure they'd be happy to accompany you.”

“I definitely will. I've seen some interesting things online that I'd like to see in person.”

Bucky gave you a small smile before speaking. “Then get to work.”

And he stood up. Suddenly, you felt the panic sweep through you again. Was he going to leave already? You felt your heart drop to your stomach and you stretched out the fingers on your hands as he started walking.

“Well, I'll leave you. I have some mission reports to fill out. Report them to Fury before midnight. Most boring part of this job, honestly.”

Every word out of his mouth made him stand an inch farther away and you suddenly didn't like that feeling. You wanted to speak up and stop him, but your head was making you keep your mouth shut with your muddled thoughts hovering over every part of the room. You could almost see every possibility and every word clearly around the room. It was chaotic. You felt chaotic.

Bucky turned to see you, and when your gaze met his, everything stopped in an instant.

“You used to love doing that paperwork.”

The world slowed down to that moment. For a second, you could only perceive his body focused directly at you and his sparkling eyes that told you more than you could comprehend. You felt an itch in your fingertips and had the urge, for a second, to rush out to his side.

That was the part of you you didn't know. The part of you that your head was always fighting with. The memory of your body. The instincts that surfaced every time you experienced a strong feeling. Your head didn't remember it, but your body did. And your rationality was always fighting against the instincts of your body, because it was reluctant to a reality it didn't know. It was all so unfamiliar that you had no choice but to keep yourself in a constant tide of alertness.

There were never any dangers around you, but you always felt the need to be prepared to defend yourself.

That was one of those moments.

“A lot of things I hated to do you loved to do,” Bucky spoke again, this time redirecting his gaze elsewhere in the room as he seemed to be flooded with memories.

His longing face touched you and, for the first time, it looked like your body was going to beat your head.

You got up from the table and Bucky's head moved quickly, as if pulled out of a reverie. He watched you for a couple of seconds in silence, and when you said nothing, he shook his head.

“If you need me, I'm in B wing. Floor five. Room four.”

And without further ado, he turned around again, ready to leave the room.

“Wait!” you exclaimed louder than necessary. You cringed at how loud your voice came out and what it implied that it sounded almost like a prayer. It startled you, and you wanted to disappear when his body turned as he was about to grab the doorknob to open the door.

His eyes… his eyes told you everything. If only you knew the language they spoke; if only you could pay a little more attention; if only you could hold him a little closer…

You felt fear at the path your thoughts were taking. Your body's instincts were taking over the mechanism that kept you from losing your sanity.

“Y/N, you don't have to tell me anything. I'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable that I said that. I shouldn't have-”

“It didn't make me uncomfortable,” you replied quickly, interrupting him. “It's just… sometimes I don't know how to handle these emotions.”

Bucky nodded.

“I don't know how to… handle you.”

“Handle me?”

“Handle what you cause in me.”

You watched him take a big breath in, his shoulders moving noticeably as he took a deep breath. You didn't know if he wanted to talk or if he wanted to stay silent so you would continue, but you didn't give yourself much time to think about it.

“Sometimes I feel like this whole thing is beyond me, you know, but other times I feel a huge familiarity with what's around me and it's like I've been to that place a million times before.”

You let go of your clasped hands and felt exposed. Talking like that made you feel vulnerable, even though you sensed you should have had that kind of conversation with him before. But that didn't change the fact that the discomfort didn't go away, nor did the need to let him know.

You were barely processing the words coming out of your mouth as your own ears picked them up, as if you were automatically reciting the writing your heart has practiced. The things that part of you had been keeping quiet for a long time had found its way out of you, to express yourself because keeping quiet and silent was turning it into a slave of suffering.

“That's how I feel with you… sometimes. Like I can't handle what I feel and what I think, but other times I feel like I've seen you a million times already, that I've felt this way a million times. And that you've looked at me that way a million times too.”

Bucky stood static in front of you, and his eyes never left yours. The intensity with which his gaze penetrated yours almost made you cringe, because you might not understand all that he was silent and showing through his eyes, but boy was he a man who knew the power of expressing a feeling through the window of his soul. You could almost touch through the masses of air the love he used to profess for you. That he professed still.

“I don't even know what's right and what's wrong because my mind has a limited view of the whole situation. I want to remember and at the same time I'm terrified that I can't.”

“Nothing will change if you can't remember, Y/N.”

“Except everything will change if I never get my memories back. You know that. Don't tell me things like that to make me feel better.”

“I'm not doing that. I don't want to lie to you. I just don't want you to feel like you're failing everyone by not doing it. That's completely out of your will, you know that?”

Reluctantly you nodded. You longed mightily for his words to be a relief, but the storm of emotions didn't go away. On the contrary, the mess inside you grew much bigger. You seemed to feel things far more powerful than your mind could handle.

“The point is, I wish I could learn to handle it all. Because maybe that's the way back to what it was before. By learning to handle it, I'd also stop feeling like I'm going to explode just because you look at me or because you don't.”

“That might be true,” Bucky agreed with you, cocking his head to one side, and for the first time in several minutes his body moved across the room. He seemed to want to move closer to you, and you felt the entire space around you shrink into a small room. The distance was monumentally disastrous, and you didn't know if you wanted him farther away or closer. “Maybe surrounding yourself with familiar things might help you remember, do you want us to try?”

With the tone of voice he was managing, you didn't know if you were sure what he was referring to. You watched his body move closer and closer until you were barely a step away. As you watched him closer, you could tell more closely that he wore an expression you had never known before. He was so very, very relaxed, his eyelids drooping a little lower over his eyes; you didn't even notice any trace of the wrinkles that hinted that he was worried, stressed or confused. No, that expression was confident and calm, the way you feel just after taking a shower before going to bed. It was that kind of domestic, familiar, homey calm that provided the certainty of knowing you were in a safe place.

The Bucky you saw in front of you must have been the one he used to be before the accident.

“And how would we do that?” you could barely muster.

Bucky cocked his head to one side and grimaced as if he was thinking very hard about an answer. His gesture brought a smile to your face. Despite the tension that had suddenly formed between you, you didn't feel the need to run away. Rather, you felt enveloped, precisely, in a safe place.

“I could accompany you on a tour of the city.”

And the idea didn't strike you as crazy at all. In fact, when he had mentioned it, the only person you had thought you might ask had been him.

And you had thought that would be the most extravagant thing you could say to him.

“How about it?” Bucky added to his suggestion, a small lopsided smile gracing his face.

“Sounds like a good idea,” you nodded, your own smile lighting up your face.

The man in front of you nodded, that sense of reassurance never leaving him for a moment. You felt as if you were inside a bubble of unwavering peace.

“Would tomorrow be okay?” Bucky asked.

You pretended to think about it the same way he had before.

“Let me check with my schedule. You know I have very busy days.”

The laugh you drew from his mouth felt like the biggest of prizes. Still apprehensive to accept those emotions, even your mind yielded to the power of Bucky Barnes' melodious laugh. Your defenses were nil at that moment.

“All right. Fair enough.”

And in less than a second, he turned around to walk back in the direction of the door. You felt a chill run through you from the space he had been occupying in front of you.

“When you get your answer, you know where to find me.”

And he walked out of the room. That time you couldn't stop him.

You stood there for several seconds staring at the door trying to process what had happened. You felt like you had just come out of a trance and were experiencing the aftermath one after another without respite.

Your mouth also felt dry.

When you regained consciousness and came out of that space in your head, you began to make your way out of the room. Strangely you felt that something was missing. The interaction you had had with Bucky had felt like deja vu. And now that it was over it felt almost wrong.

You walked in the direction of the exit from that wing of the Complex that led directly to an entrance to the section where you were staying. On your way, you kept repeating Bucky's expressions and in the end his tone of voice so calm, so familiar and so unfamiliar that it had your heart doing somersaults.

You didn't even know at what point the whole situation turned against you. First you came completely reluctant to still accept that there was a part of you that seemed to act instinctively when Bucky was near, only to end up just inches away from him accepting that basically you could still perceive those love-related emotions that you didn't know how to interpret. But you wanted to, of course, you had to make that clear to him.

Your mind for the first time was at ease and your heart felt like it was where it belonged. Your guard was so low that you couldn't even foresee what would happen next.

Your vision went white, accompanied by an extremely sharp pain in the back of your head. You could barely groan from the pain as your knees gave way under the weight of your body and you fell to your knees a few feet from the door.

You felt your little heart pumping blood to its maximum capacity, but you couldn't process what was happening.

You closed your eyes tightly, a thunderous beeping sound echoed in your ears.

Suddenly all your senses were magnified exponentially. The ground above your knees felt so scratchy that even through the fabric of your jean you could feel the friction of the material with the dust molecules. What little wind you could feel coming directly from the air conditioner sounded so loud in your ears that it began to dull the sound of the deafening beeping. You didn't know how your vision was, but closing your eyes so tightly caused a strange pain in your eyelid and it didn't take long for the tears to start building up and sliding freely down your cheeks.

You didn't understand what the fuck was going on.

The only thing you remembered was Bucky in a million scenarios. A bunch of images all projecting at the same time inside your head. A hundred words and sighs. A countless amount of sensations.

You felt and perceived everything at the same time.

Until everything was silence and darkness.

--

Tag: @stray-npc

[marveinator]

Afraid- Ellie Williams (3)

Afraid- Ellie Williams (Part 3)

part 1 -> part 2 –> part 4

Summary: You and Ellie stay a bit in the cabin, and decide to play a game of truth or dare. Things indeed turn out in a weird way...

A/N: WHEN I TELL YOU I FORGOT I WANTED TO POST TODAY LMAO... Ty guys sm for the support on the last parts, I love you all. I adore you so so much and the fact that people are reading this story is just insane to me. THE NEXT PART WILL BE SO GAY- be excited. It´s gonna get all sweaty and there is gonna be lots of tension... but first- get your popcorn ready for this one. ENJOY!

Chapter warnings: mention(s) of drug use, flirting, idk.... bye!

"You gotta stop looking at me like that babe, or we both won't get any sleep tonight-"

I was staring at her. What was this fucking weed doing to me? I was no longer myself anymore. Which also made my mood swings kick in... "We should get going," I suddenly said dryly. Ellie's facial expression turned from flirty to serious and-did I see that right-disappointed?

"It's too dark for that. That's what I told you." I swallowed. If we didn't leave now, I was sure I would be making a big mistake.

"Ellie, don't act like you've never ridden back in the dark before. There aren't that many zombies around here anyway, are there?" I knew the answer. My question was unnecessary. I asked it anyway, simply to escape this situation.

"What are you trying to run away from babe?" Ellie whispered as she slowly leaned in closer and took another drag from the cigarette. I felt like my heart was going to stop. Those damn green eyes. I could get lost in them.

There must be a way time would pass faster then... I frowned and tried not to stare directly at Ellie. Running away now, I realized, was definitely a stupid idea-unless I wanted to die today. I again felt the urge to do something very stupid, the high not helping.

"Babe look, I know the sight of me is irresistible, but I'd still like an answer to my question. Unless you want to solve this whole situation some other way-" she said as she leaned in even closer. "I-" was all I could get out, this girl… where did all my hatred towards her go? I was probably red as a tomato and realized how I was nervously playing with my fingers. Suddenly it was hot. Very hot. Too hot-

"Okay- this is your fault. Truth or dare."

What? Was she serious? Or more like- crazy? Where did she get the stupid idea to play such a childish game? But however, the temptation to play it was there and it was huge, so I just nodded silently, immediately regretting it.

"Alright, I'll start…. Truth or dare?" asked the brunette in front of me, still holding the now very small cigarette in her hand. "Truth," I replied, hoping it would be an innocuous question. Ellie rolled her eyes playfully and shook her head. "Boring, but alright. Who was your first kiss?" Great. I could have guessed the questions would go in that direction. "None of your business," I said simply. And I was right. Why did she want to know such things anyway?

"Oh babe, you're really giving me a hard time right now," Ellie muttered as she finally flicked the burnt cigarette from her fingers, only to turn her gaze back to me. "Those are the rules. You have to tell me the truth. Now don't be such a chicken."

A chicken? I'd show her that I definitely wasn´t a chicken. "Fine. Liam. But only because I've never really had contact with anyone else." Wow- I couldn't believe I just said that… I was talking to Liam's killer about him, was I completely crazy? Yeah, but also high… whatever.

"Oh. Um- did you like it at least? So it was your only kiss too?" Even though the round was over and it was Ellie's turn now, I still answered her questions. "Well, I don't know, don't have anything to compare it to because yes, it was my first kiss and so far my only kiss. But now you- truth or dare?", I asked Ellie. She shook her head and contorted her face a bit, apparently surprised by my answer, before replying, "Dare. You know, ´cause I´m not a chicken." And there was that smirk on her lips that might make me want to jump onto her and-

"Mmm- interesting. I don't know- like, what am I supposed to say? Swap shirts with me?", I said with raised eyebrows. I really didn't know what I was saying anymore. At least this game kept me awake….

"Good one," Ellie said as she lifted her arms and pulled her sweater over her head. I couldn't help but stare at her. The tattoo on her arm, her hands, her accentuated belly- wow.

Ellie noticed my look and grinned again. How I hated it. "Your turn, pretty girl."

What- WHAT?! Did she just- without thinking any further about it I took off my shirt too and handed it to Ellie. She gave me her sweater and I pulled it over my head. I would have liked it better if we would have stayed like this- without clothes…

"Well now you again… Truth or dare," whispered the brunette across from me as she leaned down and put her hand on my knee. I felt my whole body start to tingle. I wanted her to put her hand away- or at least that was what my brain was telling me. My body, however, reacted quite differently.

"Dare," I couldn't take it anymore, something had to happen. The weed was doing things to me and Ellie was sitting in front of me with my shirt on and it felt like I was forgetting everything that had happened, what she had done, what was around us and what would happen the next day. I just wanted to- what did I want? I don't know. But I had the feeling Ellie knew exactly.

Ellie Williams POV "Dare" I heard her say, and immediately my heart started pounding. Sure, with truth you could ask intimate questions, but dare was something else again... Slowly, I moved my hand that was on her knee a little higher before looking deeper into her beautiful eyes. "Oh darling, you don't even know what you're doing to me right now…" Before I could lean in closer towards her to whisper what she needed to do, I heard an all too familiar sound in the distance. Clicker. Fuck.

your POV Did I just hear that right? Spellbound by Ellie's eyes, I shook my head to concentrate. "Is that- what I think it is?", I asked her in a shaky tone. The mood had changed in one fell swoop. Ellie stood up, dug in her backpack for her pistol, and loaded it. "From now on, you have to be quiet. No sound," the brunette ordered. "But Ellie-", I tried to argue, but the girl was quickly on her knees again and held her hand in front of my mouth. "You listen to what I say from now on. No arguing." And with those two sentences, I went quiet. Cautiously, I went to reach for my own gun, but Ellie shook her head. Was she trying to protect me now? Well, she did owe me a few things...

Ellie Williams POV She was known for one thing, she just couldn't stay calm. All the more I was surprised that she obeyed me. Probably only because she had not met the zombies that often yet and had a hellish fear. Normally she had patrol with someone else, in areas where there were really almost none.

Well, I thought there were none (anymore) in this area too, especially not in here, but I immediately realized that this was different, when suddenly I saw a clicker standing in the middle of the door. At least he was still away far enough, I had time to prepare for a fight. The bad thing was, I didn't know if there were more. This would mean that if I shot him, a whole herd would probably come running.

I looked down beside me to see her sitting there. Her hands were shaking and her face was pale, but she was still beautiful. Her hair fell in her face and brushed her eyelashes. She sat there, on the floor, so innocent- in my sweater. I could get used to seeing her in my clothes….

I was jolted out of my thoughts as the clicker kept coming in our direction. I raised my gun, trying not to make any noise as I got closer to him. Maybe I could pull the knife out of my pocket and stab him that way? But would this be so much quieter? I knew how these things could scream.

I turned around once more, and nodded to the girl sitting there so fearfully. I had to make a decision now. And so I decided to shoot. After two shots, the clicker was already dead on the ground, and stopped squealing.

"Get up, we have to get out of here," I said hastily. I grabbed my backpack and reached out a hand to help her up.

your POV Gratefully, I accepted Ellie's hand and clasped it to let her pull me up. I briefly felt a strange tingling sensation again, but it stopped when the brunette let go. "Grab your stuff, we don't have any time to waste. More of them could come in here at any time." I nodded and grabbed my bag and dark gray jacket, and we were already on our way out. It was snowing and definitely very cold. I wanted to hide my hands in my pockets, but I had to hold my gun. How smart of me to forget my gloves exactly today...

"Can you even fight?" Ellie asked. "Of course I can- why shouldn't I be able to fight?!", I replied indignantly. "I don't know," Ellie shook her head, "Never really seen you in action before." Great. Was I supposed to prove something to her or what? No. Was I trying to prove something to her? Hell yeah. "Alright. When we get back to Jackson, you and me. A duel. But at your house, I only have one room at Maria and Tommy's and there's definitely not enough room to fight" I suggested. Ellie grinned AGAIN and agreed with me. "Alright."

Slowly, we made our way to Shimmer and mounted up. From the looks of it, there were no clickers here anymore... luckily.

Now that we were both on the horse, we rode back. The whole way back we were both silent, but just before we got to Jackson's gate, I heard Ellie whisper a soft, "Please don't make her regret it," which I guess I wasn't supposed to hear. That's when it all came back to me.

We had almost kissed. We got high together and had played truth or dare. I was too tired to get worked up about it now, but I knew tomorrow-I would sink into shame.

[izzyspussy]

54 sentences added to take away the glass:

[NON-GRAPHIC DISCUSSION OF PAST SEXUAL ABUSE]

"Or, if it was me with Keeley. And Keeley felt like that sometimes, 'cause of something I was doing to her, only she didn't never tell me so I just kept doing it and making her feel like that… Rather wouldn't have sex with her at all, honestly. So I gotta know so I can be able to tell her. Or, you know. Whoever. 'Cause they wouldn't want to do it." Dr. Sharon smiles slightly. She takes a moment to stare at Jamie with a gentle sort of amusement that Jamie gets from Keeley and his mum all the time and used to get from Ted too, sometimes. Then she gives Jamie a slightly more pointed look and points out, "And you said you and she haven't been having much sex since that talk?" "Yeah," Jamie confirms. She stares at him some more, waiting for him to figure something out. He stares back, waiting for the same thing. "...Oh. Well," Jamie throws up his hands, "how am I supposed to ever figure it out then?" "Do you really need to?" Dr. Sharon asks. Jamie glares and opens his mouth, irritated to have to repeat himself which she usually doesn't make him do. But she shakes her head slightly to let him know she's not quite done asking. "Are you interested in having sex with other people?" "No," Jamie says, and then immediately feels like a liar for some reason. "Rather, are you interested in having more one night stands or other casual, short-term affairs," Dr. Sharon clarifies, apparently seeing something conflicted in Jamie's face. Right good at her job, Dr. Sharon is. "No," Jamie says, and that feels much better. "In that case, does it not seem redundant to go out of your way to find out what your sex-related triggers are with Ms. Jones when presumably the only person you need to be prepared to have informed discussions of the topic with is Ms. Jones herself?" She pauses there to let Jamie parse through her point. He supposes she's kind of right. There wouldn't really be any difference between finding something Jamie doesn't like on purpose and talking about how not to do it again versus finding it by accident and having the same talk. Still… Something rubs Jamie the wrong way. "I should know," he repeats, helpless and grouchy. Dr. Sharon makes another considering noise. "Are you concerned that Ms. Jones wants to end her sexual relationship with you?" she asks. "No," Jamie answers, and it's surprisingly easy. Their first go around he wasn't worried about it then either, but out of hubris. Then for a while he was a bit worried she wouldn't want to even be his friend, and then when they started up again this time he figured for a while he might just be a rebound to her. But he's confident now, more confident than he'd even realized. They have a real grown-up relationship now, one like what Mummy and Simon have. It's mental. In a good way. "Then I don't see any practical reason for you to actively seek out this information." She pauses, tilts her head in that way that means she wants him to try some eye contact with her, to really hear her and take her seriously. "Jamie. You don't have to be ready to have sex with anyone who might be interested." "Yeah, I know that," Jamie mutters petulantly. "I know what consent is." "Of course I'd trust you to know that about yourself better than I do," Dr. Sharon agrees easily, sitting back again. "But sometimes it's helpful to hear these things said out loud, especially by an uninvolved party. And I think it's relevant here to point out that you're allowed not only to say no, but also to be unable to say yes." Jamie doesn't ask what the difference is, even though he kind of wants to just to be difficult. He's pretty sure he gets it. He's also pretty sure it's not gonna sink in properly in just this visit. Still, he's here for a reason, and it can't hurt. "...say it again?" Dr. Sharon smiles. "You don't have to have sex with anyone, Jamie."

tatg is now currently 46k words long Sign up here to be tagged when I post this or other Ted Lasso fic.

[mysteryshoptls]

SSR Jack Howl Bloom Birthday Personal Story: Part 2

"Happy Birthday"

(Part 1) Part 2 (Part 3)

[Savanaclaw Dorm – Birthday Party Venue]

Deuce: 'Kay, moving on to the next question. Uhh, it is…

Deuce: "What is your best class?"

Jack: Unlike a certain someone, I study everything evenly so that there's no huge gap in my grades, but… I'd say my best class is probably Protection magic.

Jack: Being able to throw up magical barriers, or learning attacks specifically for defense is the definition of what a mage should be learning… It always gets me pumped up.

Deuce: Protection magic, huh. I do like how we get to do practical exercises from time to time.

Deuce: But when it comes to learning in the classroom… Guess it just doesn't make sense to me when they're just going on about theories in a class setting…

Jack: Hmm. I'm pretty okay with that level of theory-work. I do pretty good on my exams.

Jack: On the other hand, I got a ton to work on with the practical applications.

Jack: Whenever I gotta dish out different types of magic one after another, it's still anything but smooth. I still have a ton to work on.

Deuce: Dude, that's really cool of you to be able to say "I still have a ton to work on," so easily like that.

Deuce: During our club activities, too, you're always running until you're able to clear the set target time.

Jack: Obviously. And that task I wasn't able to do in my last class, I'll make sure that I perfect it for next time.

Deuce: Last class…? Aah, you're talking about how we had to try to hit the given target with a flame blast!

Jack: Yeah. The assignment itself seemed pretty easy, but it doesn't necessarily go as planned.

Jack: Just 'cause you fire off some magic haphazardly, it doesn't mean that you'll hit your target.

Jack: You have to stay calm and aim each shot carefully to increase your accuracy…

Jack: Even if I know what I have to do in my head, sometimes it just doesn't work out like I imagine it to. Magic and sports are kind of similar like that.

Jack: Eh, that's why I throw myself into my practice. It's the best feeling whenever you can surpass your previous abilities.

Deuce: I really do learn a lot when I'm with you, Jack…

Deuce: Listening to you like this, I finally understand why I wasn't able to hit my target.

Jack: Did… Did you even read your textbook? I was just repeating what I read there, didn't you realize that?

Deuce: Eh, really!? I didn't remember that at all.

Jack: I don't care what your grades are, y'know. But next year, when we'll be having bouts in our classes, you won't be able to win, at that rate.

Deuce: Ah, you're right, I remember some upperclassmen saying that later on, there'll be some bouts.

Jack: Yeah. We separate into offense and defense and spar using everything we've learned up until that moment… I'm really looking forward to it.

Jack: Apparently the result doesn't affect your grade, but if I'm gonna go for it, I want to win it.

Jack: I have to build the best foundation now, and show of the best results possible.

Deuce: Yeah! If I'm ever pitted against you, Jack, I'm definitely not going to lose!

Jack: Heh, that's what I want to say. Don't think I'll lose, though.

Jack: You better actually start studying, so that it's a worthwhile match.

(Part 1) Part 2 (Part 3)

[eating-plastic]

Howdy, sir. Hope you don't mind me sendin' you this online letter- I mean, "an ask"- . Your Rita kindly sent one to me and my darlin' and as I am still gettin' used to this kinda thing, I thought I'd send one back. Kind of fun, ain't it? You're "Roller" Ricky, that right? From what I've been told, you're a dog lover too. You also don't exactly come from "modern times", do you? Though I suppose you're more "modern" than I am, friend. Listen, I was wonderin' if I could ask you some questions. First of all, what the hell's a Roller Rink? Secondly, I'd love to hear more about Maxy. You say he's an "emotional support" dog? I quite like the sound of that. I guess ol' Rufus was somethin' like that for me when I was growing up. Tell me all about you and your sweetheart. How did the two of you meet? What was it that drew you to her? I hear that you can be a romantic kinda fella; is there anything the two of you like to do together?

You say you're from a place called Gallows Creek. I ain't never heard of it, but from where I'm from, that kind of a name is sure to send a shiver up your spine. What's it like there? I hear there was some murders there for a time. By the way, does Rita really eat plastic? I sure hope not. Anyway, I won't hold up any more of your time, sir. You have a good day now.

-Jack Marston (@tojackwithlove)

Hey man! Wow, Rita was right, you are an actual cowboy. Time really is a crazy thing! I can't imagine how you're getting along with the internet and all. I mean, sure I'm getting used to it too, but I'm a lot more familiar with technology like mobile phones and TV. I guess that means it's just gonna be a fun learning experience for the both of us!

Oh yeah, Rita did send an ask to you and Bun. She absolutely loved your response, she's an absolute sucker for love. You two live a really simple and sweet life, and we both wish you nothing but the best, man! Oh, and to answer your one question, she thinks Bun calls herself that after rabbits.

Now on to your questions!

That's right, roller rinks weren't really around during your time, huh. Well, do you know what roller skates are? They're just shoes with little wheels on the bottoms. A roller rink is just a place where you can roller skate while listening to some great tunes. Typically you can skate alongside your friends and talk, race each other, or dance. It does take a bit of balance though. Hey, if you and Bun are ever in the area, I'd love to teach you both how to skate! It could be a fun double date with me and Rita! Oh, and can't forget Maxy either!

Speaking of, Max is just the best. I found him when I was going through a very rough time in my life. Some awful stuff happened, and I harbored a lot of guilt about it...which then caused me to turn to the bottle. It was a very hard time for me but eventually I got help for my addiction and found some people to talk to about my problems with; really good people who would listen to you without judgment, even when you'd relapse and the guilt really messed with you.

Anyways, someone in this group I was in recommended I get an emotional support animal because I was still um...I was still struggling to get my mental health back on track. I found this animal shelter not too far from Gallows Creek, and I went to look at the dogs there. As all of the eager dogs were trying to get my attention, I noticed this little, sad puppy just lying in the corner away from everyone. Poor little guy. I was just drawn to him, you know. Apparently, Maxy was adopted by a previous family as a Christmas present but was returned immediately after they realized that dogs are...well, you know, living things that are a big responsibility. We were both two sad, lost souls who needed someone to help us, it would've been a sin to not adopt him. It's amazing what a little bit of love can do. In a week, he was a friendly, happy little puppy and I was starting to feel a lot better about, well, everything. I mean, this change didn't happen overnight. I uh...I had some days where I wouldn't really feel like doing anything, moments where the guilt and self hate would get a bit too much...and even as a little puppy, Max knew. He can read me, just like how I can read him. He knew I wasn't doing okay, so he just curled up on my lap and allowed me to pet him. His little way of telling me that everything was gonna be okay.

He's the best dog you could ever ask for. Friendly, happy-go-lucky, but also willing to help you when you're feeling down. He's got his cute little quirks too. He's got this special howl he does when he hears a train go by and he's also a real pro on roller skates too, even better than me. You really gotta see it to believe it, man!

I'd love to hear more about Rufus. I like to listen to other people talk about their pets. If he provided you with some sort of comfort growing up, then he was an emotional support dog, through and through. You know, they always say when you adopt an animal that you're rescuing them, but really, they're the ones rescuing you.

I'll happily talk about Rita and I! You see, I met her when she moved into Gallows Creek and wouldn't you know it, she moved in right next door to me. She told me she got a bit pressured by her parents to go around and introduce herself, make a good impression you know. So she came up to my door and we ended up talking for a bit. I noticed how she seemed really shy and awkward about the whole thing, but Max seemed to make her more comfortable. He absolutely loves to meet new people. From there, we just kept on running into each other here and there when we'd both head out for walks (I was walking Max and she was looking for a way to unwind). She'd usually tell me about how college was going for her and some of her interests.

One day while we were walking like usual, I mentioned Maxy and his skating and she got really intrigued by that. I can't say I'm surprised, a lot of people that haven't seen him in the rink wanna see it. I told her to stop on by, Max does like to show off a bit haha, and the next day there she was, watching him in awe. I taught her how to skate that day too. I invited her into the rink and she got nervous about the fact that she hadn't roller skated before. I could feel her shaking while I was helping her get her balance, but I'll never forget the smile on her face and the light in her eyes. I taught her how to dance in her skates too. Man, the best way that I can describe the feeling that day was just...right. Like gliding around with her in my arms was perfect, meant to be, and she thought the same thing.

Rita got all nervous again, but I didn't know why; after all, she was much more confident with skating now. She confessed that she wanted to be more than friends, that she had been in love with me for a little while then. Man, you have no idea how happy I was to hear that. I mean, I was falling for her too, but you know how things can get when you're both friends. Heh, I'm honestly surprised I didn't confess it sooner because I can be a bit of a blabbermouth. Ever since then the two of us have been going strong.

What drew me to her? Man, where do I even begin? Well first of all, I love how passionate she can be about things. Sure she's shy when you meet her, but once she gets comfortable, it's fun to hear how much she can talk about a topic. Even when I don't know what she's talking about, for example when she talks about doing an experiment in one of her labs, her joy is just so contagious. Sometimes she'll say something that reminds me of something and we can just go back and forth about different topics for hours. Another thing I love about Rita is her optimism. She's a very positive person who loves to look on the bright side of things. But above all, I love how compassionate she is. We both love supporting each other and the people in our lives. When I have my off days or when school's getting tough for her, we're there to listen and hold each other; to tell each other that everything is gonna get better soon.

"Romantic kinda fella?" Haha, well I can definitely get a bit cheesy every now and again, but it does cheer Rita up. Gallows Creek is a very small town, so there's not much to do. I was worried that would turn her away from staying here because of her being from a much larger city, but no. She's amused by the simple pleasures in life and often turns away from grand things. The roller rink is our main place to unwind. Whether it's just skating and talking or getting down to some good music, it's always fun for the both of us. We also go out to the few restaurants around here too, but sometimes we just get takeout and stay inside and watch a movie. The arcade's also a fun date night for us. I wasn't that good at video games, whether on cabinet, console, or computer, but I'm starting to get better. It helps that she doesn't like competitive games, so we play co-op more. Oh, you know that animal shelter I adopted Max from? Well, I volunteer there from time to time, and sometimes I bring Rita along. She absolutely loves animals like me, and nothing beats the look on her face while she plays with the puppies and kittens. Sometimes when we do get a little burnt out by Gallows Creek though, we make the drive to Des Moines or head up to her home city in Minnesota for a bit more variety.

Gallows Creek is...well...I can't lie about the few murders here. Back in the 50s, there was a um...a serial killer, yeah.... I was a kid at the time and I only knew about it at school when the teacher actually warned us about it. Most kids already knew from their parents who read the newspaper, but for me well...my folks were often too drunk to even remember that I existed. The next and only other big murder that happened was in 87' and...honestly, I'm still struggling a bit to come to terms with just because of how...personal it was. It just...It just was an unfortunate tragedy for everyone involved.

But other than that, no, Gallows Creek is not dangerous. It's your typical small town where everyone knows everyone, and it seems like recently, everyone is really supporting each other after um...everything that happened. People already were friendly enough, but now it's really feeling like a tight knit community. I know the name seems grim even though it doesn't refer to an actual gallows, although I uh...I don't think its real origins are any better, and yes, we do have those two unfortunate stains on our history, but believe me when I say this: Gallows Creek really is a great place to live, and I love some of the people and places here.

Wow, that got a bit dark at the end there, but other than that, I appreciated the questions, man! Me, Rita, and Maxy really appreciate the positivity you sent our way. You have a good day too!

Oh, and no, Rita doesn't actually eat plastic. She just came up with the name because she loves raccoons.

[lpsluvblr]

I know I said I would send in those Hazbinverse stuff but now I am in wild Vinnie x Esteban (uhhh Estennie?) mood so I want to talk about them a bit.

I said it a few times but I don't think I ever went into detail how exactly I see their dynamic and it's very unique for my Vinnie because Esteban is the only one he has a sorta enemies-to-lovers dynamic and you probably remember that I hate this dynamic normally. Not here though, but honestly it's not even exactly enemies to lovers or rather it's only that from Vinnie's perspective.

The way I think of them in human au is everything happened like it happened in the episode: they all met Esteban and he told a bunch of lies about himself to be praised and adored, Vinnie was the only one who thought of checking if it was true since his legend apparently went viral (I don't know in what world Vinnie of all people would be the only one to think to check that but that's what happened in the episode so that is also what happens here), he got pissed when he realized that Esteban lied to his friends (that damn hypocrite) but then Esteban did something that helped his friends and so Vinnie decided not to reveal the truth (but I'll be honest, I have no idea what that something could be in human au, I mean they couldn't get trampled by humans cause well, they are humans etc).

So from then they went like that for a while but then at one point Vinnie realized that no, actually he was not fine with Esteban lying to his friends at all, how dare he! But... he had already promised he wouldn't say anything and we both know how seriously he takes keeping promises/secrets. So now we have Vinnie that with every day gets more and more pissed at Esteban but can't say anything and Esteban who thinks they are cool and even more cause holy crap it was so nice of Vinnie to spare his pride so he has even bigger fondness for him. Because of that he starts hanging out and talking with all of them, especially with Vinnie, more and more often.

The result is that Vinnie is super passive-agressive, grumpy, sarcastic and uses a lot of irony with him. On one hand he genuinely likes Esteban and wants to keep up this image but on the other he is still angry at him. It's even funnier if we give them a crush on each other cause Esteban I imagine would remain the same yet trying out some flirting and being more touchy here and there. While Vinnie is just >>>>:( cause he kinda likes it and he hates it. As for everyone else? They are just really confused cause Vinnie does not act like that around anyone else, sure he can get a bit mad or grumpy sometimes, but this is connected to his mood, not to a specific person. Well, normally it is because in this and only this case it is connected to Esteban and they're even more confused since as I said Vinnie used to be completely normal and even really friendly with him but then suddenly started getting all riled up as soon as Esteban as little as shows up.

Bonus though: at one point Esteban just casually drops that whole bomb of his heroic stories being a lie because he started feeling really guilty and has known them all long enough that he believes they will still like him even with knowing the truth and Vinnie thought he was gonna explode once that happened. Before anyone else could even say anything Vinnie snapped his neck towards him and yellled "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???! i HAVE BEEN FIGTING DEMONS FOR MONTHS NOT TO REVEAL YOUR DAMN LIES AND NOW YOU'RE JUST SAYING IT ALL SO CASUALLY? THE FUCK WAS ALL MY EFFORT FOR THEN?!" and queue everyone else being even more confused while Vinnie is still screaming away at Esteban and shaking him like

Yipee!

That ending made me laugh so hard and now he’s dead and Vinnie can know peace.. just kidding lol

I love the fact that Vinnie still keeps his word to not say anything because he’d rather let his friends believe this guy and make a new friend than rob him of that chance In general.

Also I feel like the only reason Vinnie checked was because he was the only one who thought this guy was too much and Russell got him into the habit of double checking his facts after being wrong about so many things so he’s just like “fine I will” I also think maybe it could be Vinnie just being nosey and trying to figure out more about this guy and what he’s really like and when some people meet someone new they tend to search for their internet profiles and such so maybe something like that?

In conclusion for now Vinnie is a great friend and Esteban is fine.

I also would like to imagine that Esteban is working hard on not lying or stretching the truth so when Vinnie catches him doing it he hits him in the back of the head.

[sunny6677]

Doki Doki Relxation Club!

Summary:

In the stressful year of 2013—and in your years of being a late adult overworking themselves to the bone on a boring job at the local donut shop, you find yourself wishing you had some form of relief from all of this. But when your childhood friend Jaune ends up sort of making you join a group dedicated to getting away from all of that—you meet four beautiful women in the process. Jaune, your goofy and mischievous childhood friend! Carmen, the mysterious but arrogant elite! Patty, the sarcastic but calm mortician! And Lila, the head brains of the operation. Will this group truly be your escape?

PROLOGUE: A Boring Day Like Any Other.

TWS: DEPRESSION (IMPLIED)

————

"Heyyyyy, hottie!"

A high-pitched, but soft voice teasingly called out to me from the view of the vehicles window. The voice itself caused my face to flush up with a slight warmth, and let a long sigh escape my mouth. I slightly adjusted the long strap of the bag that was thrown over my shoulders, my legs marching along the grey sheet of sidewalk beneath my feet.

In the warm air, I felt beads of sweat clinging to my skin. I made my way swiftly around the dark vehicle that still rumbled on the road, and once I heard the door let out a click, I slowly pulled the latch open. The door swung open, and with a grunt, I forced myself onto the large passengers seat.

In return, a round, dumb-looking face met mine.

"What's the hurry for?"

"..mmmh.. nothing. What's you calling me a hottie for?"

"Heh—'cuz you are one. Duh. I'm just calling it how I see it." The darkish blonde-haired woman from beside me grinned as if it were obvious, her eyes slightly wrinkling as she did so.

"Mh."

I simply rolled my eyes at her, looking down at my lap. The goofy but short looking woman from beside me was Jaune—my good friend since we were both kids back in the old days. She had always been pretty goofy and cheerful ever since I met her, even if we barely got to see eachother due to me attending a different school and all, and having to get a degree for college, and.. well.. adult stuff.

Then, something came, and—well, all I can really say is we're able to talk a little more now. Apparently she had a kid of her own named Ross right now, who I very rarely saw, but.. who was a good kid in general. He was very soft spoken and quiet.

Slipping the strap of the bag off of my slender shoulder, I let my sweaty face stare out at the narrow road ahead of us—barely lit up by the sunlight from behind.

I still felt Jaune's gaze on me though, and as my tired gaze shifted in her direction, I mumbled softly.

"..what?"

"Nothing. You just look like you've seen better days. You sure you're holding up with that new job just fine?"

"..yeah. Ye—Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure." I stammered, wiping a palm over my face. Still, my lips curled up weakly. "..thanks, though. For worrying about me, I mean."

In the corner of my eye, I saw her slightly hesitate, and then smile as she glanced away. "Oh, don't worry. It's fine. Let's just get you to your work, okay?"

"..heh. Yeah. Sure." I grunted. "Okay."

————

..on the usual drive to my work, it was oddly quiet except for the faint ambience of the car clicking, and the oddly intense sound of the radio Jaune had set on. Most likely to make the atmosphere feel a little less tense.

I let my eyes drift outside, catching glimpses of friends hanging out with one another, little children playing, and.. couples.

The longer I stared out—I found myself unable to think. At least until I heard Jaunes soft, but high pitched voice speak from beside me.

"Sooooo—did you look at any of those little group things I sent you?"

"Group things?"

I blinked. And then realized. "..oh. Uh.. yeah. Kinda. I couldn't really decide on which one though and just ended up sorta laying there for a long time. I ended up falling asleep at three in the morning before I could think about it anymore.."

"Three? Geez, I didn't say to lose your sleep over it. You really gotta stop staying up so late, you know."

"..I know." I sighed. "It's just hard."

There was an odd silence shared between us then. Sitting in the car. I saw her swallow in the corner of my eye, and then look in my direction with a tilt of her head.

"Hey.. I know things have been hard, but.. it's okay! Things are just kinda slow sometimes. I'm sure you'll find something that'll work out."

"..you think so?"

"Yeah—just find yourself something to enjoy! It's better to find something you like doing than always being miserable just because of your job."

"..mmh."

"..hey." Her voice softened, "Don't be stubborn with me, okay? I only want the best for you. It doesn't have to be a group or anything, but I want you to find some way to escape from everything that's been.. going on with you lately. Or at least try. Can you do that?"

I thought for a moment.

"I'll.."

...

And then I just nodded, sighing as I let my gaze meet my lap.

"I'll try."

I wasn't looking at her, but I could tell she was smiling.

"..there we go. See? It'll take some time, but you've got this! Just keep pushing, alright?"

"..sure. Whatever you say."

————

The usual hour of Go-Nuts passed by like the same repetitive record it always was. Boring, plain white walls with pastel pink coatings—and bright displays of crisp donuts at the counter which I stood behind. The only other employees her beside myself were about two. After all, it.. was a very under staffed place due to how little customers it usually had.

Faint, sweet scents from the donuts hung in the air, and the apron I wore around myself made me begin to feel as if I were practically drenched with sweat despite me not even moving around that much. I adjusted my legs as I leaned against the counter, groaning.

It was night by now.. and even though normally I was what the average person would consider a night owl, still, I felt this.. numbing tiredness.

And the more I stood, letting my gaze meet the counter—the more Jaunes words came back to me.

She wanted to me to check out groups around town. Or just to do activities in general. I.. didn't want to dissapoint her, but there really wasn't anything around here that caught my interest. Barely anything seemed to catch my interest lately.

...

I really wasn't that good of a friend, was I? Not even being able to do something so basic for my own friend.

..I sighed again.

The sound of a voice though quickly cut me off.

"..uh.. heyyyyyyy—how you doin'?"

The stretched out, feminine tone made me look up—and in the center of the door that was now held open was none other than—

"..oh. Jaune."

I shook my head, adjusting myself and standing straight up. "Sorry, my dear. I didn't see you."

"It's okay! I space out all the time."

"...yeah. That you do."

"..."

"..so.. uh.. did you need something?"

"Actually—there was this.. one thing." Huffed Jaune. "My sons out with his friends for tonight, so.. I.. thought maybe you could come check it out!"

"..okay. What is it?"

"Uh—you know that one group I keep telling you about? Where you can go to relax and drink if you want."

"Oh. Yeah. You've.. told me about that a lot. Are—"

I paused. "Are you saying you want me to go check it out?"

"Yeah! After your work anyway. Just to see if you might like it there or anything."

"..I see."

"..what is it?"

I blinked, letting my gaze trail down to my palms. "I dunno. I just—the idea of joining something like that seems kind of draining."

"It's a group where you can relax, though.."

"..yeah, I know. Just.. the thought of doing anything is.. draining."

I let my hand slowly slip to the top if my head, and I tugged at my hair. "I don't.. know if I can do it."

"..."

I felt a gentle touch against my head, and I looked up—no—felt my face being tilted up as Jaunes hand had slipped onto my cheek.

"..look, I know it's been hard for you." She gently spoke, "But.. you really do need to go start doing stuff more. If you don't, you won't really find a way to get rid of.. any of what you're feeling. Believe me. I know that. I won't make you if you really don't want to, but living like this isn't healthy. You've gotta at least have a hobby or something you're into or.. something that makes you happy."

"..."

"..I'll help you with how you feel in an way I can, but it's not gonna go away on its own if you keep living like this and do nothing about it."

"So.." She sighed, "...do you know if you want to come check it out?"

"..."

I let my mind linger over it for a final time. The bags under my eyes felt a bit heavier now, and I frowned slightly deeper. A slight bit of irritation crept into my mind.

I didn't want to do anything. I really didn't want to. It all felt so draining and.. pointless.

But she was right. I couldn't ignore that.

I gently sighed.

"..y'know what.. maybe I will."

"..really?"

"Yeah. When.. when you put it like that, I guess you're sort of—right in a way. Maybe. I don't want you to feel like I'm a bum or something."

"Heh—hey, you're not anything like that, okay? You're just going through a lot. That's all." She softly smiled.

"..I'm really proud of you."

At those words, something threatened to tremble out of my eyes, and I looked away.

Flatly, but with a smile—I said in return: "..thanks, Jaune."

"..how about I drive you down to where the group is after your work?"

"..alright. I—suppose I don't mind that. Don't feel like you have to do all this just because of how things are right now, okay?"

"That's not how I feel. I just wanna help you out. That's all."

She smiled again, finally releasing her hand. "I'll see you in a bit."

..softly, I mumbled. "..yeah. See you."

[magicalqueennightmare]

Sins & Amends Chapter 50

Billy Russo x Female Reader (60 part story)

This follows pre- the punisher into the storyline of daredevil, punisher season 1 and beyond

This is NOT Canon Billy. This is decent human being Billy left with bad options over worse decisions

This was also posted to A03 under: WaywardGaPeach. That account and this one is the only place you'll see me post this. If you see it on any other platform/account know it's not me.

Chapter Summary/Warnings: Misunderstanding be damned. You and Billy have a heart to heart, you reveal something you've hid and maybe there's a chance to work towards a new start

One thing you'd loved about Curtis from the first time you met him. The man didn't ask questions if a friend told him they needed something. 

He showed up at your place and when you opened the door he handed you the keys to his car then proceeded to grab a drink out your fridge and sit on the couch "I'll be here however long you need me to stay with her Y/N. Go take care of whatever you have to" 

You leaned over the back of the couch and hugged him around the shoulders "You're one in a million Curt" he laughed and said "Can i get that in writing?" You grabbed your jacket and slipped it on before replying "Hell I'll even get Foggy to notarize it" "Be careful" he called as you headed out the door.

--------------------

You hadn't exactly planned what you were going to say to him as you parked in front of Billy's building. A sick thought occurred of the possibility of him having someone in his place with him but you pushed it off your mind. 

You had to know what was going on with him even if it was just to make sure it wouldn't mess up his schedule seeing Adi because normally that would've been his first stop.

You locked Curtis's car and slid the keys into pocket. You kept an eye on your surroundings until you got in the building then headed for the elevator.

--------------

When you finally got to the third floor you found your steps slowing the closer you got to his door and realized you were nervous. Every fear you'd ever had about Billy was popping up in your head. From him having someone in there all the way to him deciding family life wasn't for him. No he loved Adi. That much you'd bet everything on.

----------------

You stopped in front of his door and took a deep breath before knocking. You heard his muffled voice from the other side say something along the lines of "Hold on" before the door was swinging open to show Billy dressed in a dark blue t-shirt and black jeans. He'd taken his jacket off since you'd saw him but it was apparent he'd been wide awake.

His dark eyes scanned your face for a long moment worry showing plainly in them "Y/N? Are you ok? Is Adi ok?" You finally nodded after a moment spent just staring into his eyes "I'm fine and she's ok but I need to talk to you"

You saw him take a deep breath like he was bracing himself for something before he stepped back and motioned you inside "Come on in"

-----------------

You stood just inside Billy's door and let your eyes flicker around his apartment. You'd been there a couple times but it was such a contrast to how his last place had been it startled a part of you still. 

The only decoration in the place was a few pictures of Adi scattered around the room. 

Everything else was so blatantly bare it hurt some part of you to see. You finally turned to face him and realized he'd been staring at you so you decided to jump in head first "Billy you've acted weird towards me since Christmas. Now I don't know what I did but please tell me. At least for Adi's sake cause I don't know a lot about the whole co parenting thing but I know everything is easier when two people are on the same page"

"It's you and Matt" he finally said after a moment and you took a tentative step towards him before you found the words to ask "What about me and Matt?" 

------------

Billy couldn't look you in the eye as the memories flooded his head. Of all the things he'd worked to get back a large part of him wished those memories had been among the ones Frank had knocked permanently out of his head.

He could see you that night in Josie's. He'd found out about you seeing Matt from some mutual friends. He couldn't quite remember who but he'd seen you around with him and couldn't help but show up at the bar once he discovered Matt and Foggy frequented it.

He'd sat in the corner knowing how to lose himself in a crowd and waited. It wasn't long before he'd heard your voice. He followed the sound to see you sitting in a corner booth with Matt, Alice and Kenzie.

For longer than he'd ever care to admit he'd watched you and Matt. You were beautiful. The black jeans you wore hugged your body perfectly and the red top showed just enough cleavage to be sexy but not too showy. Matt was attentive to you. Never turning away when he spoke and leaning closer when the noise in the bar started to grow. 

He watched as you had leaned your head over on Matt's arm much like you had tonight. He had broken the beer bottle in his hand when you tilted Matt's face towards yours and left a lingering kiss on his lips. 

You had looked happy until you saw him then your whole demeanour had changed. You whispered something to Matt then when he'd purposely stepped in your path when the two of you started to leave. You'd grabbed Matt's arm and walked out, he hadn't even wanted to imagine what you'd done when you'd left the bar.

------------

The longer Billy remained quiet the more worried you got. When he started rubbing his hand roughly across his head, tugging slightly at the longer locks that'd grown out since he'd been out you knew you had to do something to break him out his own mind so you stepped closer to him and gently put your hands on both sides of his face. "Billy?" 

He blinked a few times before his eyes finally focused on yours. You smiled when you saw that he was actually looking at you "Talk to me. What is bothering you about me and Matt?" 

He closed his eyes and took a few slow breaths before he finally covered your hands with his own holding them to his face "I remember you being with him. I remember the two of you as a couple after I broke up with you. Every time I've been around you and him together it digs it in a little deeper. He's a good guy Y/N. A better guy than me"

"Billy open your eyes" when he did as you asked you pulled your hand free from his face but before his face could fall from the perceived rejection you grabbed one of his hands and placed it on your pulse point on your neck "My heart beat speeds up when I lie..no matter how hard I try for it not to so I want you to feel as I say this. I was with Matt yes. He treated me damn good and me and him are still close friends and hopefully will remain friends because by now I couldn't imagine my life without him in it but I do not want to be with him like that. Nothing with him ever came anywhere near you. When I think of my future these days I think about Adi and you"

----------------

His dark eyes never left yours as you spoke and you felt his hand shift to be cupping the side of your face instead of holding your neck "Do you mean that?" He asked in a low voice that made your stomach flip "Yes Billy I mean it"

Without thinking you surged forward catching his lips in a quick kiss. He looked as stunned as you felt when you pulled back. You studied each other for a moment before he was suddenly kissing you like he was trying to make up for the years you'd been apart.

Every part of your body felt like it was on fire as Billy advanced on you and you backed up until your back hit a wall never daring to pull your lips from his in fear of breaking the moment. His kiss had always been intoxicating and after this long you felt like an alcoholic that had allowed themselves a drink of the finest whiskey.

His hands smoothed down your sides pulling light noises from your lips as you moved your hands to his shoulders trying to pull him even closer. He let his hands move lower to grip your hips tightly which caused a gasp of surprise to leave you.

---------------

As suddenly as it had started it was over. Billy drew back from you and backed away like you were on fire. Your chest was heaving from his actions moments before but you were hurt. Did you do something wrong? Or did he really just not want you like that any more?

"I can't do this. Not now" he muttered and it felt like a slap in the face when it occurred to you he meant kissing you. "Why can't you kiss me Billy?" You asked, feeling very defensive until he spun around and the emotions in his eyes made your breath catch in your throat 

"Because I don't want to just kiss you. I want nothing more than to show you how much I've missed your touch, your taste..those sounds you make when you're under me and coming undone. But I can't. I love you and our daughter with everything I have but I'm not fucking up this second chance. I need to be the man you both deserve and being with you like that now wouldn't be right"

You threw up your hands in a mixture of frustration and pure embarrassment from initiating the kiss to start "Why does everyone else think they know what I deserve or not?" He stepped back closer to you and cupped your cheek once more "Sweetheart it's because of how much I love you that I want to do this right by waiting"

You froze staring into his eyes and knew he'd meant every word. It took you a second before you were able to say "I don't mind waiting" he smiled and leaned forward to press a kiss to your forehead. 

You closed your eyes when you felt his lips on your skin and grabbed his arm before he could step away "My couch is pretty comfortable so why don't you come over? Adi would love to wake up to daddy after a week without seeing you" he searched your face for any uncertainty about him staying at your place and when he didn't find any nodded "Let me grab some clothes"

The ride back to your place was in silence. You glanced at Billy whenever you got to a stop light and he'd simply smile at you. A part of you was worried what Curtis may say about Billy coming home with you as you parked in front of your building and both of you headed inside.

-----------------

When you walked into the door of your apartment Curtis glanced up from the tv and simply hitched an eyebrow when he saw Billy walk in the door behind you. "She's sleeping soundly mama" he said with a smile as he stood up and walked towards you.

You leaned up to hug him "Thanks Curt" he nodded when he pulled away and said "Anytime Y/N. Have a goodnight" then glanced at Billy and added "You too" and patted his shoulder on the way out too.

After Curtis walked out you realized you and Billy were still standing in the entryway of your apartment so you motioned to the couch "I'm gonna grab a quick shower then I'll get you a pillow and blanket. If you want we can watch a movie or something?" He nodded and said "Sounds good. Mind if I grab a shower after you?" "Yeah no problem. I'll be quick"

------------------

You went back and forth on what to wear to bed then finally just decided on your usual bed clothes consisting of an oversized shirt and some sleep shorts. Wasn't like Billy hadn't seen you in a lot less.

You grabbed the extra pillow off your bed and stepped into the closet to grab one of your spare blankets then walked back into the living room.

Billy was sitting on the edge of the couch and glanced up when you walked out. You walked over in front of him and held out the pillow and blanket "I'm gonna check on Adi while you're in the shower" he nodded and sat the pillow and blanket down next to him and said "I'll be quick" then stood to head to your bathroom.

----------------

When Billy got out the shower you were sitting in the recliner scrolling through the lists of movies you could watch. You were used to watching Disney ninety percent of the time so it felt weird to be looking at anything else. "So what you pick?" He asked and you glanced up to see him standing in the doorway in a pair of grey sweatpants and a white t-shirt. 

"Um thinking a western?" He nodded and dropped his dirty clothes into his overnight bag "Sounds good to me" he sat on the couch and his eyes flicked towards you a few times before he motioned next to him "Wanna sit over here with me?" 

You tried to ignore your heart beating in your throat when you stood and walked across to sit next to him. You were being ridiculous. This was Billy, the father of your child. You'd known him for so long it was hard to remember a time before him yet you felt like a teenager left alone with her boyfriend for the first time.

He stretched his arm over the couch behind you then leaned over and whispered in your ear "If you don't relax a little I'm gonna start feeling unwanted here" you smiled then let yourself sink back into the cushion and pulled your feet up under you. After it was clear you were comfortable he grabbed the remote and clicked play.

------------------

As you were watching the movie you felt your eyelids getting heavy but fought it. The longer you stayed up the longer you got to be around him without any pretenses having to be put forth but when your head dipped one time and you woke up a little while later with your head back against his shoulder you realized the fight was useless. You were fucking exhausted and needed to go to bed.

------------

When your head started dipping Billy tried to keep the smile off his face. He'd seen you try to stay awake past exhaustion more than once and knew what it looked like. When your head dipped the last time and he felt a pressure against his shoulder he smiled when he glanced down and saw you were leaning against him.

God it felt like heaven with you so close to him but he knew it was only temporary. You'd have to go to bed eventually then come morning you'd go to work and so would he and the moment would be over. Hell he didn't even know if you'd still feel the same way when morning found you.

When you sat up and stretched with a yawn he smiled when you said "Sorry Billy. I gotta head to bed" you stood up and was almost to your room when he said "Goodnight Y/N. I love you"

-------------

You froze with your hand on your door. You didn't know what to say. Hours before Billy had just told you he wanted to wait to try to be together again but now he was saying he loved you?

You didn't try to face him. You knew you couldn't look into his eyes and not say you loved him, not say you wanted to be with him so you simply said "If you need anything knock" and walked into your room shutting the door behind you.

Billy was asleep when he heard a scream and jumped straight up off the couch. Before his feet hit the floor good he was moving towards your room. He'd know your voice through any fog of sleep. You sounded in pain. 

He'd just touched the handle to open it when it opened to show you. Your eyes were wide with still unshed tears and he saw streaks of them down your cheeks. Your hands were shaking when you nearly collapsed against his chest, heavy sobs wracking your body.

He held you tight trying to comfort you enough you would be able to tell him what was wrong. "Sweetheart, talk to me. I'll do my best to fix whatever it is" you finally pulled away from him a bit and he felt his heart break at seeing you so upset "Rawlins had Adi. He hurt her Billy. I have to check on her" 

He had to force the knot in his throat back down to his stomach. Of course his sins were still haunting you "Rawlins is dead. I promise you. Adi is ok. She's safe" you shook your head, eyes still wide "No i have to check on her Billy. I have to make sure that she's safe. I have to" 

He nodded and said "Ok love. I'll go with you to check on her. I'll even double check the window" he started to step back so you could lead the way but your hand shot out and grabbed his arm "Please stay close to me. I don't want to be alone right now" he slid his arm around your shoulders without a word.

---------------

He could feel his jaw tensing as he stood watching you check Adi twice over then you moved to insure her wardrobe was in front of the window which was locked up tight. He hated seeing you like this. He hated not being able to fix it. He'd do anything for you and Adi but he couldn't kill someone who was already dead. 

He didn't want to disturb you but after a moment you reached back for his hand and pulled him up next to you. He ran a hand across your lower back and said "See? She's safe" 

Your voice was barely a whisper when you said "He hurt her Billy. It felt so real" he pulled you against his chest hoping to give you some sort of comfort "I'm so sorry" he hoped you knew he meant that for so much more than a nightmare.

You laid your head over on his chest so he wrapped you in a hug before you said "Thank you for being here. I haven't told anyone else about the dreams besides Alice and Karen. Alice only knows because I had a few at work before during a long shift. Karen because I've been sharing a bed with her and had one. They've happened since I was pregnant"

He closed his eyes against the flood of emotion that came along with knowing how long you'd been dealing with the horrors alone. "Y/N I promise you I will die before I let anyone lay a finger on you or her" you sniffled against his chest and nodded "I know you would Billy" 

You felt horrible to even ask but you knew normally after a nightmare you didn't see a lot of sleep so before you could stop your mouth the words had already escaped "Billy would you mind laying down with me? I don't want anything but for you to hold me. If I know you're there I'll know she's safe"

You wanted to take it back in fear but he just leaned down to gently touch Adi's back then grabbed your hand "Of course sweetheart"

-------------

You walked into your bedroom with Billy following you. Your nerves were still very much on edge and every noise made you jump. "Which side?" He asked and you pointed to your side of the bed so he went around and sat on the other side then looked back at you "Do you want me to hold you or do you want to lay on my chest like you always liked to do?" 

You swallowed twice before saying "chest" he climbed under the blanket then held it up "C'mon" you slowly climbed into the bed and scooted over until you were almost next to him "Are you sure? I mean I know we aren't back together I just I want you close after that. I still feel safe with you"

He reached out and pulled you onto his chest "It's fine. I'm glad to be here" you took a few seconds to get comfortable then glanced up to see he was watching you with that patent Russo smirk "Good now?" You nodded "I'm much better. Thanks for doing this"

He raised an eyebrow and his smirk deepened into a grin "No thanks needed for holding the woman I love when she needs me" you rolled your eyes then said "I mean it Billy. You said you weren't ready and this is more intimate than any amount of kissing" he leaned down and left a gentle kiss on your temple "You're welcome sweetheart. I would do anything for you and our babygirl"

"Is there anyway I can help you?" You asked letting your fingers lazily draw circles on his clothed chest "You already are. You let me in our daughter's life and back into yours. These last few weeks I hated pulling away from you but I had to know if you wanted Matt because I meant it when I said you only deserve the best yet you still want me. When you came to my place tonight, that meant more than anything. Even after everything. Even though we're not quite sure what the future holds you want me here comforting you. I never dreamed of getting this again"

You cut your eyes up at him "I want us to have another chance Billy" he brushed your hair back from your face before saying "I do too but we have to get there first. I know how much Frank means to you and I won't make you pick between us. I need to prove to him that I've changed. You and Adi..everything should be perfect for you two"

"What if it's not?" You asked lowering your eyes but he raised your chin up with one finger and smiled "When I have you and her? How could it not be perfect?"

He held your chin while he placed a gentle kiss to your lips. When he pulled away he said "Just know I love you. I have for years and I always will. You have always been the best thing in my life and now we have a perfect little girl. I wouldn't want a future without some hope for us. As for tonight lay your head down and get some sleep. You and her are safe"

You laid your head down on his chest and let the steady beat of his heart lull you to sleep.

Billy woke up a little while before you and started to pinch himself to make sure he was in fact not dreaming. You were really here cuddled up to him. 

Your hand twitching against his chest was the first sign you were waking up. When your eyelids fluttered open you looked up at him with a sleepy smile and let one finger trace the scar on the cheek that was closest to you "Good morning. Did you sleep good?" He nodded "How about you? No more bad dreams?" 

The way he felt when you smiled sweetly and said "Not a one" would've been enough to make him joke at his own expense at one time but now he relished the feeling.

Before anything else could be said he heard a noise that sounded very much like your front door opening and heard you curse yourself for forgetting the chain lock.

He was out the bed and to the door before you. He glanced back "Stay here just for a second please?" You nodded so he stepped out the room.

-----------

You were about to go out behind Billy when you heard Frank's voice even though it was lower than usual "What the fuck are you doing here?"

You quickly stepped out of the room to find the two of them staring each other down in your kitchen. Frank was clearly on the offense while Billy was just trying to gauge whether or not he was about to be forced to duck a punch.

You moved across the floor to be effectively between the two of them "Frank please calm down. This isn't what it looks like" "Oh sweetheart I am calm for the simple fact that I know Adi is asleep but are you really gonna try to tell me you and Bill both didn't just come out of your bedroom?"

"We slept as in actual sleep. That was it Frank" you kept your voice low but steady. "Yeah Bullshit. Tell someone else that" he nearly growled but you didn't shy away from him. "What's that supposed to mean?" 

He looked between you and Billy "It means the last time he was in your bed as far as I know anyways you had Adi or do you not remember crying to me because you didn't want to be alone when you found out you were pregnant?" you flinched at his tone and the memory.

Billy didn't want to get into it with Frank but he had to speak on your behalf "Frank you're overreacting man" Frank glared at him as he said "Funny I don't remember even talking to your ass?"

He turned back to you "Y/N i fucking love you and that little girl in there but are you forgetting the hell he's put all of us through? Hell you don't even trust him to go on a mission with me and Curt and not fuck Madani why would you want him in your bed?" You felt Billy freeze and glanced over to see he wasn't even looking at Frank but was staring at you "Yeah didn't think she'd told ya that Bill. She don't trust you either"

Billy felt like he'd been hit by a truck. Was that why you came to his place? You thought he'd been screwing Dinah? Hell the two of them didn't speak to each other outside of work or her asking about you and Adi. How fucked up was he that he couldn't show you that he only wanted to be with someone if that someone was you

"Y/N?" Billy asked Frank temporarily forgotten. You nodded "You threw it in my face that you were fucking her at one time Billy then you started acting weird" he shook his head "I never felt about her or any woman for that matter how I feel about you" he wanted to pull you into his arms but he knew when to leave well enough alone.

You wiped the hot angry tears from your face as you looked between them both. Fuck it hurt just looking at them. The two men that had always meant the most to you and they could barely be in a room when you were concerned.

"Frank he didn't pull the trigger. His crime in Maria and the kids dying is the fact that he should've let Rawlins kill me. Now me and Karen have talked about this and I know she's talked to you. You've seen how he's changed. He loves Adi. He's trying to be there for you and Curt again. Hell Sarah has even told us how he protected her and Zach when shit went down. I shouldn't be asked to pick between the men I love because one was a fucking idiot and should've let me die multiple times over"

You felt your hands shake and saw both Frank and Billy's faces fall when they both reached for you but you stepped away "No. I'm sick of this shit. I have been being pulled in two damn directions for too long. Frank you and Curt knew about his deal before I ever did so it could've been squashed long before I knew. Billy, whatever guilt you carry voice it now. This is coming to a head before Adi wakes up or I swear I will kick you both out"

They stared at each other for a long moment before Frank said "I want to hate you and I hate that I don't want you dead anymore" "Why?" Billy asked and Frank pointed to Adi's room "She lights up when she sees you. Y/N has been beating herself up for having feelings for you since she found out she was pregnant. I can't hurt them and you dying would. See, Adi is your daughter but I was there supporting Y/N when she had her. Not only that but Y/N has waded into shit neck deep for me. I ain't gonna lie I can see you've changed but I can't let myself not hate you. Not yet"

Billy nodded then said "I get it Frankie but there's nothing I can do to make it up to you" "Y/N and Adi are the only thing I have left of Maria and my kids. If you two didn't have sex why were you in her bed? I'm not standing by for you to use her"

You held up a hand and when Frank looked your way you sniffled before saying "I invited him to sleep on the couch so he could spend a little time with Adi. I woke him up when I had a nightmare about Rawlins hurting her. He comforted me and made sure I knew he'd keep her safe and I slept for longer than a few hours at a time for the first night in years. These nightmares haunt me because I know I shouldn't have this life. Frank I want for me and Billy to eventually have another real chance but I can't lose you"

Frank finally broke and pulled you into his arms shushing you quietly "You're not losing me. It'll take time but you're not losing me"  Billy stepped forward and when Frank looked up he said "Frankie no lines were crossed because I know I don't deserve her and Adi. She should put me through the wringer for another chance. I love her and Adi more than life itself. I want to be a brother to you and Curt again one day but I swear to you if I fuck up this chance I'll load the gun and hand it to you. Their happiness means more than my life"

Frank held out a hand and when Billy shook it he said "I'm holding you to that"

You laughed against Frank's chest and when they both looked at you like you'd grown a second head you shook your head "Why does everything with you two have to have some alpha male bullshit agreement?" Frank kissed your forehead with a chuckle and said "Let's talk about it over coffee"

You heard Adi call you from her room and a small smile found Billy's face "Can I?" You nodded so he headed for her room.

----------------

Frank watched him go then said "He is doing better and he does love her. I'll give him both of them cause he has my back in the field even though I've told him I don't think I'll ever fully trust him again"

"Frank I want a future with him but only if I can have you too. I've waded into shit neck deep to pull you out because I can't lose you and I just want to know if it's possible to have you both even in the future?" You could barely look at him but he put the coffee down then said "Y/N look at me"

When you did he took a breath then said "Honestly there isn't a lot that would make me walk away from you and Adi. Just take it slow and go in with your eyes open. As long as he treats you two like you're the best things he's ever even came near having a chance of having we won't have any trouble. He needs to keep you and her safe and happy but when you decide to give him another chance just don't hide anything from me please"

Without thinking you pulled him into a hug "I love you Frank" he chuckled and patted your back "Yeah kid I love you too"

@intothesoul

@weallhaveadestiny