#apparently whenever i dissociate as a kid. it was aly taking the wheel until its safe but i have the Memory Hole Curse

[aria0fgold]

i really really hate to bother because. i know this can be a very personal thing and i dont want to overstep im just..idk i want help on a thing? you dont have to feel pressured if you dont want to disclose. but i was wondering how exactly you figured out you were a system? i mainly ask because ive been questioning for a while now and i just want to hear others experiences..

It's okay, I don't mind! And I don't think it's overstepping for me really! Tbh, I first wondered with being a system aroooouund last month? It was around the time I was drawing, and out of boredom I was like: "Man I wanna talk to someone but I need to draw." And then at the time, Alerik (the one I normally call Aly) went and talked to me! But during then, I was like: Haha boredom so strong I ended up talking to an OC (I remember making a post bout that too cuz I thought it was just a silly imagination thing).

I even had to cut that drawing time slightly short cuz after some time, my head just started hurting REALLY BAD, it was a different kind of headache than I normally had which was weird since I didn't do anything different much. And then! A day after that, Aly stayed and kept talking to me which I was like: "Oh wow this is kinda nice." (The system anvil hanging above my head waiting for me to notice it). So during that month, Aly would talk to me on and off and then I had sooome suspicions like: "Wait a sec what if this is... more than just imagination?" And Aly would just "Yeah. You're a system." And I was like: "??? BUT WHAT IF--" "Aria, search about it." I searched about it: "...But still--" "*loud sigh*"

It wasn't until I played Slay the Princess when I mustered up the courage to ask around bout it cuz I remember seeing friends from a server think of Slay the Princess as a game that really shows what being a system is like even though it isn't reeeally about being a system. So I sent a message like: "Yall what does it mean when a character in your head starts talking to you without much effort and it seems like they're their own person?" And Kaun, a friend that's a system too, talked to me about it and asked around too so yeah! That's how I found out that: "Oh stars that aint an imagination thing, I'm A SYSTEM???" "I told you..."