#aoi keeps her low voice too its great

[d3zz-art]

Im currently obsessing over Space Pirate Mito, a middling 90's scifi comedy anime where the boring self-insert male protag Aoi inexplicably changes gender at the end of season 1 and her transition is played entirely straight for the rest of the show

It's almost never brought up, they just throw her in a girl's uniform and she goes on dates with her cute supportive alien gf. The rest of the show is them reconciling their relationship and fighting gods for each other. How have I not heard of this til now

This show is living proof that I'll love even the worst show if you put enough Genderfuckery in it

It's def got its misses but it's from 1999, who cares. I don't, I'm too busy looking at Them

[uarcana]

Not Your Hero | Pt. 2

Pt. I | Pt. 2

Warning: None.

Word Count:

OC’s: Aoi Tamahagane

A/N: Italics are Aoi’s inner monologue.

Reaching the end of the hall, Aoi twisted off the cap of her cheap brew before taking a dissatisfied sip.

“Sake”, she called toward her trusty feline as she leisurely closed her door with her foot.. “Momma’s home”.

With it being completely smashed to pieces from earlier, she didn’t even know why she bothered closing it.

It was practically useless now.

A sudden slam halted Aoi in her tracks. The bitter poison settled in her mouth.

Slowly turning back toward the entrance.

There was a door.

Like…a real door.

With wood.

And a lock.

And…a glass pane that read “GIN INVESTIGATIONS”.

With a light gulp, the sewage flavored liquid choking her as it descended down to her gut.

“What in the-“.

“Oh…there you are”, a gentle low voice floated through her ear as she instantly turned in light shock.

She lightly sighed once she saw Aizawa, finally remembering Mr. Wada mentioned she had a visitor.

“You sure took your time”, Aizawa commented on her tardiness as he wiped his hands on a small towel.

A delightfully affectionate Sake trilling as her thick black fur rubbed against the man’s ankle.

“It’s not safe to be walking around town so late...and with what you dealt with today, you should be laying low”.

And there it is.

“How did you find out?”, Aoi asked as she tossed her coat to the couch.

“Tsukauchi filled me in after your client tried to press charges for the ‘assault’”.

“Hm, is that what he called it?”, she replied as she took another sip, grimacing at its liquid garbage taste.

“Yeah…which reminds me”, Aizawa continued as he leaned against the archway toward her bedroom.

“Tsukauchi called just before you showed…mentioned something about a shop owner reporting an act of vandalism”.

“Hm”, Aoi responded as she begrudgingly placed the bottle alongside many other unfinished bottles on a high shelf.

“Said the culprit had some sort of ’shockwave’ quirk that shattered every bottle he had in stock…along with the door itself”.

A light chuckle floated from Aoi’s throat.

“You wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?”

“Nah”, the woman smirked, “can’t say that I have, but I’m sure the asshole had it coming”.

An exhausted sigh escaped Aizawa’s throat as he scratched the back of his head.

“Wasn’t the whole point of you taking this job for you to keep a low profile?”

“If it was”, Aoi perched herself on her desk, pulling a flask from her drawer, “doing a great job so far”.

“Quite the understatement…”, the man chuckled lightly behind heavy concern, “…which makes it peculiar as to why you didn’t press charges”.

“How so?”

Aoi sighed heavily after a hefty swig.

“He came at you with a switchblade”.

A light smirk and a small shrug gave Aizawa a light twitch in his eyebrow.

“Before you get all ‘philosophical’ on me, remember I can turn my skin titanium on a whim”.

“That’s not the point”, Aizawa’s eye twitched lightly. “It’s the principle of the matter…I mean, it is illegal”.

“So is public intoxication”, the woman chuckled before sliding off her desk. “Oops”.

“Aoi-“, the man groaned, squeezing the bridge of his nose.

“Did you fix my door?”

A split second later, his tired eyes were glued to the heteroachroma polished by a tipsy haze.

That familiar gingerly smirk shouldn’t have soothed him as much as it did.

Especially since he knew what it was.

His brows forwarded.

“Don’t try to change the subject”.

“Technically it’s all the same subject”, Aoi protested before she folded her arms. “One that you actually had no part of until…”.

Her eyes drifted to her door.

“…you need a door that works”.

“So you decided to do it yourself?”, the woman approached the teacher. “There are people that get paid to do stuff like this, y’know”.

“I figured you would’ve reacted negatively to a stranger showing up in your place after what happened”.

Aizawa stood upright. Greeted Aoi’s approach with stoic posture.

Hands firm in his pockets.

Asserting a certain dominance that he usually steered away. Seemingly to advert attention from himself.

“Hm…you don’t like the idea of strange men coming to my apartment, cleaning, fixing my door…watching over me like some sort of ninja bouncer?”

Aizawa just stared at her.

Silent.

Her hair parting just enough so he could barely see the pearl shimmering behind the depths of the most forbidden layers of blue.

“If you ask me…I don’t see much of a problem”.

Removing one of his hands from his pockets, lifting it toward her face.

Aizawa gingerly dusted her midnight blue locks away from the pearl.

Examining it thoroughly. Noticing the subtle strain she had just by looking at him.

“You haven’t been sleeping”.

“Well, neither are you”.

“Your late nights and the drinking…it’s making your sight worse”.

“And your midnight acrobatic circus routine is somehow the cure for dry eye?”

“Aoi”.

The woman sighed lightly. Letting her face drift against his hand.

“Sorry…it’s been a rough few weeks. The people in this building give me hives and the abundance of infidelity in this city…”, the woman exhaled heavily, “disturbing, it is”.

Aizawa lightly chuckled.

“To say the least”.

“That why I have a key”.

Aoi smiled. Genuinely.

“Better not lose it”.

Her gaze met his. His black stare emitting just a slight bit more color as they stood in silence.

Color she could only see for only she could see so deep.

“Get some rest”.

Aizawa gently took back his hand, letting her midnight locks drift back into place protecting the pearl.

“I’ll come by tomorrow afternoon”.

“You know, Yamada can take over for a day every now and again”.

“In English?”

“Yeah, I mean, heroics is one thing, but that A-game grammar?”

A hard chuckle stifled in Aizawa’s face.

“That’s what sells papers”.

The woman smirked. Pleased that he appreciated her joke.

A light meow drawing the man’s attention to their feet to see Sake seated on Aoi’s feet, staring wistfully at him.

“See? That’s vote number 2 for Team Grammar”, Aoi smiled toward him invitingly.

Aizawa knelt down toward Sake, granting her a few gentle pets much to her purring pleasure.

Resurfacing to Aoi was a gentle rub of her shoulder, sharing a light smile.

“Goodnight”.

With reluctant acceptance, Aoi just smiled in response before he made his way toward the door.

“No more cases until this whole thing is settled”.

“Right”.

“And no more late night walks”, Aizawa reaffirmed, halfway out the door. “You need to be more vigilant. This city has cabs, you know”.

“You drive a hard bargain, Eraserhead”, she sighed. “But I suppose there are worse fates than succumbing to toxic taxi driver fume poisoning”.

Aizawa shook his head with a smirk.

“See you tomorrow”.

The door was shut and locked.

Aoi watched as his shadow faded down the hall throw the thick glass.

Gently lifting her foot as to not startle Sake, Aoi drifted to her office window.

Her back leaned against the wall as she watched Aizawa call a taxi, making his way back to U.A.

As the car disappeared from sight, a light trill of her energetic feline caught her attention.

Her split heteroachroma gaze piercing into her master’s forcing a smile on her face.

“No sleep for you either, huh?”

Sake’s purrs so loud, Aoi could hear them as she pranced away toward her food.

Aoi left alone in her office paused briefly for a sigh before taking a seat at her desk.

Removing a file she had hidden under her laptop of a case she had opened during her previous one.

Marked “U.A. Traitor???”

Aoi glanced toward her bed briefly before returning her glare to the file.

There were people she longed to protect…one in particular she had been protecting since day one.

Sorry, Shota…but I’m gonna sleep a lot better once you’re safe…and I’ve come too far to stop now.

Removing a hidden bottle of bourbon from the lower drawer of her desk, after a heavy gulp and a lightly disgusted cough…

The midnight oil was limitless.

Eternally burning.

Tagging: @digitalkanvas​ @insomniasix​ @aquathemermaidstripper​ @glacian-apocalypse​ @melodiousjp​

[brynhildr13]

MY personal unofficial live report of NYC!

Again, this is NOT OFFICIAL. I was NOT PRESS. This is just MY PERSONAL account of my amazing experience!!! I copied it from my Facebook post i made. @baby-come-bach is "Melissa".

Okay. So now that im home and safe and I committed everything to memory i wanna talk about the show!!! IF you wanna just skip down to the meet and greet go down below the line. The stuff above is what happened during the concert.

The live was AMAZIIIIIINNNGGG!!! EVEN BETTER THAN THE LAST SHOW.

There was the stage, then the pit, then behind the pit was about 6 steps and a platform with a railing. Behind that was another set of steps and a railing and seating in the back. Once we got into the venue i told Melissa to take my poster and go get me the spot i wanted while i got merch. We were behind the pit at the railing on Uruha's side. He's my fave bandman and OHHHO MY GOD THE VIEW WAS. PERFECT. Melissa must have read my mind because she knew i like uruha but didnt know what side he stood on. Lolol. She guessed correctly and stayed to the right. I stayed in line for merch and got my stuff and went to meet her. I couldnt have asked for better view. We werr SO CLOSE. And above the pit so i didnt have to fall victim to my stature.

So we wait and then they start the show. And they all walk out all stoic and tall and QIDNWODNWJD. Kai came out first, then aoi and reita and uruha, then ruki last. And they went right into their songs. They sounded SOOOO good omg.

My highlights from the show:

Uruha was HEADBANGING ALL NIGHT and SPINNING AROUND AND SMILING HE WAS SOOOO INTO IT HE BROUGHT SO MUCH ENERGY.

Ruki kept dancing and shaking his shoulders and hips. He cant dance that well so it was endearing and funny but also kept the mood.

Kai was smiling like the sun the whole time. He LOVES to perform and it shows.

Reita kept bending down really low and slapping his bass really hard. Especially when they played one song that featured him. (the mortal) He went HAM. IT WAS AWESOME.

Aoi was so majestic. He didnt really MOVE much but he did walk around the stage with the others a lot. He was so captivating just like before.

And there were two or three 15-30 second pauses. Their english was WAY better than last time, especially Ruki's! He said "we were so excited to come to New York!! We're so happy to be here!!!!" And then they riled us up with call and answer. It was great!!!!

The second pause was Kai!! I didnt even know it was him until I heard talking and didnt see Ruki on stage!! But Kai said, "i love new York!! I love you guys!! We are so excited to be here!!" And then he did a call and answer with us.

I SWEAR THEY ALL LOOKED AT ME LIKE 25 TIMES DURING THE LIVE. It was like they wanted to see EVERY FAN. They kept their eyes up and out to the crowd most of the time!

I TRIED to show them support but i also wanted to actually stand and WATCH. So I really only Committed to Ninth Odd Smell, UGLY, abhor god, and Filth in the Beauty. The rest I was more tame on cuz i wanted to SEE them. But all those songs get me HYYYYPE so i had to give it my all.

They played Suicide Circus again too!!!!! And Inside Beast this time!!!! Those were the two songs Melissa knows best so she got to hear stuff she enjoyed! Also, we made sure to watch Aoi in the second verse because he bowed most regally with his arm up and he twirled his wrist as he brought it down into the bow. Just like in the music video!!! It was AMAZING. SOOOOOOOOOOO COOL!!! And Ruki's rapping was SO COOL TO HEAR LIVE AGAIN. it was even better than last show!

ONE THING I always enjoyed was when Ruki adds a little improv to long outros. For Sono Koe Wa Moroku which is a slow ballad he added his own little wisps of vocals and screams which was so cool!!

They ended the set with filth in the Beauty and the crowd kept trying to call for encore but no one knew how to keep time so everyone kept thunderclapping instead of joining together in one voice.

One girl in the pit got on someone's shoulders and lifted her top and flashed the camera that was recording us. I couldnt tell if they kicked her out or not. All i remember thinking was "thats DEFINITELY not gonna make them wanna come on stage any sooner." Also no one crowd surfed that I saw like last show. And this girl behind us was yelling "WE /DESERVE/ AN ENCORE." which irritated melissa and i a bit. Like, bitch, no you dont deserve it. You deserve the OPPORTUNITY for it. What a gross fan. I hoped they werent VIP cuz I wouldnt want her to be a bad fan to them and say anything rude. When they did come on stage that girl was acting like she single-handedly brought them out on stage. She otherwise didnt bother us. We ignored her the rest of the time. She was gone from my mind in two seconds once they came back out.

They played 3 encore songs and ended with Tomorrow Never Dies!! Which is a good song to end on. It has a beautiful message of hope. Once it was over Ruki kept saying "thank you!!" And we'd answer with a cheer and he said "we will see you again real soon!! Good night, New York!!" And then as we filtered out they checked our wrist bands and we were allowed into the seating part to wait until they were ready for the meet and greet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They called row by row and we were in the middle of the last section so we scooted out and ran to the top. I wanted to be LAST FOR THE MEET AND GREET. And we ended up DEAD LAST. We were next to these girls who flew FROM JAPAN to see them. I would have liked to talk to them but I was so nervous to, so i just quietly listened to them converse in japanese.

When they called us we filed down! And we went thru these doors and there were small steps and THERE. THEY. WERE. right there!!! I saw Reita's mask and hair and my stomach dropped cuz it was ACTUALLY THEM. So melissa helped me get the poster out and I unfolded it and I get up to Aoi and I was so star struck I forgot EVERYTHING I was gonna say. But i saw him look down and see it and he said "oh wow!!! Design?" I couldnt even answer. The staff beside him thought I didnt understand so she said "he asked if you drew this." And i said "ohhh my god. Yes. Yes. Design. Yes." And he looked at me, IN MY EYES with these bright wide eyes and he said "thank you! So cool! Thank you" and he took my hands in his and we looked in each other's eyes and I saw warmth and love and dedication. Im sure he saw pure terror and awe in mine but we said thank you. I slide it down to Reita and i see him look down and his eye we could see through his mask, which up close almost looked like cloth and not plastic, got so big and he has a deeper voice so he just said "WOW!!" AND stared for a second and then he looked at me and said "you draw this??" And I still had no words so I just nodded and said "YES. YES. DRAWING." And we still held eyes and he said "this is amazing!!! Thank you so much!" And he took my hands in his and shook and we said thank you!! Then I slid it down to Ruki and OH MY GOD RUKI WAS PERFECT. From my peripheral i glimpsed aoi and reita following with their eyes. And ruki saw it and his face LIT UP and he said "WOW! YOU DREW THIS?!" And I found my words so I said "yes! Kakimashita! I drew this!!" And he pointed to himself and he smiled and said "I LIKE THIS!!!! I LIKE THIS!!!! THANK YOUU! THANK YOU!!!" and he grasped my hands in his and we shook and said thank you. Then I move to Kai and he says "HI!!!" AND I SAID "HELLO!!!!" and i show him and he SMILES SO BIG and he said "oh wow! A drawing!?" And I said "kakimashita! I drew this!" And he looked at me and said "its amazing!!! Good job!! Thank you!!" And his smile WAS EVEN BIGGER AND HE just MELTED MY HEART RIGHT THERE!!!!!!!!!!! AAHH!!! and he grasped my hands in his and shook and we ssaid thank you to each other and last was MY FAVORITE URUHA and let me tell you. He recently dyedd his hair blonde and I did not like it. It was cut like a bob and it was super "I wanna talk to your manager." Our ongoing joke was to call him Susan. But i saw HIM. AND HIM AND HIS HAIR WAS A FOOT AWAY FROM ME. AND HE LOOKED. BEAUTIFUL. IMMACULATE. I ALMOST HAD THE NERVE TO APOLOGIZE. But I showed him my poster. His reaction was my favorite. His eyes got real big and he said "ooooooooooooooohh!!!! Wow!!!!!!!" And i said "kakimashita!! I drew this!!" And he couldnt even speak he just kept saying "wow!!" And he looked at me and I looked at him and we shook hands and he took my hands in his and he said "thank you so much!" And I said "thank you!!!" And then i don't remember but i think uruha was still super close to me after we let go and i turned away and i think i turned back around and black out yelled "OMG YOURE MY FAVORITE." AND I think he smiled embarassed and said "thank you so much!" And then we tried to fenangle it back into the box and i caught the smallest glimpse of Aoi and Reita leaning over the table to look and see. Eventually we got the plastic on and the staff member said "ill take it." So we handed it over and then I both hand waved and said "BYEEE THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!" AND OH MY GOD ALL 5 OF THEM LEANED OVER AND LOOKED AT ME AND WAVED AND SAID "BYEE THANK YOUU!!" and then they gave us our VIP towels and we were told to scoot so we went down the hallway and out the door!! And that was IT!!!

I. MET. THE. GAZETTE.

This is what I gave to them and Showed them.

I. SHOWED. THEM. MY. ART.

THEY. LLLOOOVVVEEEDDD. MY. ART.

AS MELISSA SAID, "it was a Total Eclipse Of The Art."

MY BIGGEST DREAM CAME TRUE.

[zenonaa]

Lost and Found

The classroom started to fill, first with the most diligent members of the class. Kiyotaka arrived, followed by Chihiro and then Sakura and Aoi together. For a little while, no one else entered, and then the second tier flitted in, that of the regular high school student. Hifumi, Makoto, Mukuro, Junko and Mondo, in that order. Next to walk in were Kyouko, Celes, Leon, Touko and Yasuhiro, pushing close to when homeroom was scheduled to begin.

That left two students yet to make an appearance.

Byakuya strode in, staring ahead and not making eye contact as he crossed the classroom and sat at his desk way at the back, which left one student still to come. Leon frowned at the only vacant desk before turning his gaze to Byakuya.

“Hey, Togami, have you seen Maizono-chan this morning?” asked Leon.

Without so much as glancing up from his book, Byakuya replied, “Yes, I saw her during our daily rendezvous this morning.”

Leon jerked his head back. Touko stiffened. The room held its breath. Byakuya noticed and rolled his eyes.

“... Obviously not. Why would I know where that girl is?” he said, scowling and returning to his book, which did little to appease Touko.

“A hollow doll like that...” Touko said through gritted teeth. She trailed off and clenched her pen so tightly that any harder might have cracked it. “Maizono wishes she could...! Get together!”

“Hey, be nice,” scolded Aoi. The next mutters from Touko were too quiet to be discernible but that satisfied Aoi, who skimmed through the rest of the room twice. Ultimately, she lingered longest on Sayaka’s desk.

She furrowed her brow and scratched at her cheek.

“It’s just Maizono-chan missing now,” she remarked. Most of the class exchanged puzzled looks. Byakuya continued reading. “You know, I didn’t see her at breakfast either, now that I think about it.”

Judging by the silence, no one had.

“That is not I.C. at all,” murmured Hifumi, holding his chin.

Makoto’s chair screeched back as he rose sharply. He pressed his hands against his desk, arms straight like pillars.

“A small sense of uneasiness is sprouting inside my heart,” Makoto said in a low voice, his body trembling as he stared downward. “And... slowly growing larger and larger. I...” Makoto gulped. “I’m going to check on - ”

Sakura stood up. “I’ll go.”

A beat passed. Then Makoto sat down again. After all, it wasn’t like Sayaka had been stabbed to death in her shower or anything. Sakura tucked her chair into her desk and left the classroom.

She didn’t pass many people in the corridors as she headed to Sayaka’s dorm, and those she did see didn’t stop to chat or try to waylay her, giving no more than a nod or a dodge to the side. When Sakura arrived at Sayaka’s door, she rang the bell. No one answered, yet Sakura could hear activity on the other side of the door. Footsteps pounded and furniture seemed to grunt.

Not wanting to intrude, Sakura pressed the button again, and this time, she called out.

“Maizono? Are you alright?” asked Sakura.

The noises stopped. After a few seconds, footsteps resumed, only now the door cracked ajar and a segment of Sayaka’s face showed.

“Oh...!” Sayaka widened her eyes, receded and opened the door fully. She kept her hand on the handle. “Good morning, Oogami-san! I’m sorry, did you need me for something?”

Sakura studied Sayaka. Her hair was brushed and she was wearing her uniform, but her face seemed more like porcelain than ever. Also, and this would have been missed by the less observant, the light usually in Sayaka’s eyes appeared dimmer. This didn’t escape Sakura, who as a martial artist was used to detecting even the slightest of changes in her opponents though she would not classify Sayaka as one of those.

“Not exactly. We were wondering where you were. It’s not like you to miss class,” explained Sakura.

A crease blemished Sayaka’s forehead. She touched her index finger against her lips and averted her gaze.

“I see. I’m sorry if I made you worry,” said Sayaka quietly. Sakura raised a hand.

“Please, that is not something you need to apologise for. Usually, you are one of the first people in the classroom. We were concerned that something was wrong.”

There was a marked pause.

“Kinda.” Sayaka cringed, still not meeting Sakura’s eyes, and she wrapped her arms around herself. “Sorry, but you’ll probably laugh at me. I mislaid an important charm bracelet, and it might not seem like a big deal, but I can’t...”

She choked on a sob despite how she tried not to and angled her body away.

“.... I can’t go out until I’ve found it,” finished Sayaka. Her eyes glistened as she lifted a hand and rubbed at them with her knuckles.

Such a sight pulled on Sakura’s heartstrings, though outwardly, Sakura’s features didn’t budge.

“Clearly, this bracelet is very important,” said Sakura, her voice betraying nothing either. “Do you know where it is?”

Sayaka sniffled and nodded. She swiped the heel of her hand against one of her eyes.

“I remember having it on in my room last night, and I thought I left it on my bedside table before I went to sleep.”

“Then, if you consent, may I come in and help you find it?” asked Sakura. Sayaka hesitated, then wrung her hands.

“I don’t want to trouble you,” Sayaka said, looking down.

“Helping you is not what troubles me. You being distraught is what does,” replied Sakura. “Therefore, I will help you, so long as it would not make you uncomfortable.”

Sayaka contorted her lips momentarily, then said, “Alright. If it won’t inconvenience you...”

She stepped back and let Sakura in.

Sakura had visited Sayaka’s room before on a few occasions, but the two had never been alone together. They were friends, don’t misunderstand, but usually there was at least another person present, like Aoi, Chihiro or Makoto.

Anyway, even though Sakura had been here previously, she was still taken aback by the lack of customisation. Most students decorated their dorm. For example, Sakura’s abode housed stacks of breaking tiles and she had drilled training dummies into her floor. Her Gi and red belt hung on a clothes hook and posters from magazines were pasted onto her walls.

Here, though, Sayaka’s room looked much like Sakura’s had when she first arrived at the school, before she stylised it. Breathing in, Sakura perceived a floral aroma and felt it wash over her. It was a pleasant scent that seemed to follow Sayaka wherever she went, so it didn’t surprise Sakura that the room smelled of it too.

Sayaka walked over to her bed with Sakura close behind and gestured to the bedside unit.

“I thought I left it here,” she explained. “Shall we retrace my steps?”

It definitely wasn’t on there. Sakura picked up the bedside unit with ease. Sayaka gasped, staring at it.

“Oh my goodness,” said Sayaka, her hands on her cheeks. “Sorry, I forget that you’re so strong!”

“I have trained my whole life,” replied Sakura. She set down the wooden unit on a different spot and added, “But you are as well, Maizono.”

“Me?” repeated Sayaka, tilting her head. Sakura bowed hers.

“Indeed. I have watched many of your shows, and you are active on your feet for a prolonged period. Not only that, you must sing too, and later, deal with energetic fans... It takes a lot of perseverance to do that with a smile. I admire your strength greatly. You’re inspirational.”

Sayaka blinked with her hand over her heart, at a loss for words. Sakura’s heart leapt and she shifted her weight as she looked down. Something silver caught her eye and on closer inspection, it was a bracelet laden with metal charms, including a fairy, a mermaid and a key. She picked it up and revealed it to Sayaka, who jolted.

“You found it!” Sayaka gushed, and she grabbed it back. Her eyes scrunched up as she cradled it against her chest, shaking slightly. “T-Thank you, Oogami-san... You’re my hero.”

Sakura grinned.

“I’m glad we found it. It must mean a great deal to you.”

“It does...” Sayaka hesitated, then she knelt down. She pulled out a box from under her bed, fastened with a padlock.

Using the key on her charm bracelet, Sayaka unlocked the box and opened it. The box contained a lot of knick-knacks, such as small pieces of fabric, costume jewelry and bottle caps, and photos were attached to the inside of the lid. Many were of her idol group, but newer, fresher photos depicted her with a few of their classmates.

Sakura sat down beside her and took a closer look.

“I like to keep these as reminders of people,” Sayaka explained, brushing her fingers over some fabric. “People come and go, and I want to hold onto what I can of them.”

A pause. Sayaka’s hand moved to hold onto the edge of the box and she peeked at Sakura.

“Um... if you’re alright with it, I would like to remember this act of kindness from you,” Sayaka said.

She studied the contents some more, biting her lip, before turning her head and shining a smile at Sakura. For a second time that morning, Sakura’s heart skipped.

“I would like to take a photo of us to put in here,” Sayaka said, and her knuckles whitened as she gripped the box harder. “If that’s okay, I mean. You’re such a good friend. Not just because of this, but how you look out for me and ask if I’m doing okay other times...”

Her lashes fluttered and her smile threatened to slip. Sakura boosted it with one of her own.

“Of course, I would love to be in a photograph with you,” Sakura assured her. Sayaka relaxed and whipped out her phone. She positioned her head beside Sakura and with a single tap, she took a selfie of them both.

“I’ll print it later,” said Sayaka as she lowered her phone, and she turned to Sakura. “Again, thank you for coming here... that bracelet belonged to my mother, and if I had lost it...”

The thought of that happening caused her shoulders to hunch. Her face tensed.

“I understand,” said Sakura. She rested a hand on Sayaka’s shoulder. “Like I said, I wanted to help you.”

They stared at each other. Light had returned to Sayaka’s eyes.

“You’re so lovely,” said Sayaka, and she looked away, blushing. She fidgeting with her hair. “Um... I think I’ll clean my face up, then I’ll be right out, okay?”

“I’ll wait for you outside.”

After Sakura left, Sayaka remained seated for a while longer, examining her phone. Then, she marked the latest photograph with a heart symbol, switched off the screen and headed to the bathroom to splash cool water onto her rosy cheeks.

[arcane-shadow]

Don’t You Dare Pity Me

Characters: Togami Byakuya, Naegi Makoto

Warnings: Graphic descriptions of violence,  Panic Attacks, PTSD, 

AO3 Link

My Bad Things Happen Bingo 

Byakuya prides himself on his composure, the stoicism and aloofness expected of him as a Togami.

Even during their ill-fated killing game he had managed to keep a hold of himself. He had been a beacon of calm within their group while the rest of his classmates panicked and ran about like headless chickens. So afraid of death and murder.

He had, of course, been prepared for such situations. The world of a Togami had been a cutthroat one, full of vicious competition not only between rival corporations but within the family itself.

Byakuya Togami had grown up in a world of unseen and unspoken violence. Countless times he had been on the receiving end of an attempted assassination, and had of course been instructed on the ins and outs of that particular underworld trade himself. He was prepared and confident for the eventuality of having to kill to survive. It was to be expected of a Togami.  

(Regardless of certain individuals and certain circumstances, he still considers himself willing and able to commit that final act of violence. The world is an even more dangerous place now than when he was a foolish teenager; he will not allow himself to be beaten in this dog eats dog world.)

(Although, and If only for his own continued safety and goal of rebuilding his corporation, there may be the existence of a few annoyances he would willingly stick his neck out for...)

He survived, and continues to survive.

Very little, he had thought, could rattle the great Byakuya Togami’s composure now. Despite his very brief moments of weakness (the ones that occasionally peered through his rotting and decayed memory of Hope’s Peak to haunt him) he thought himself a more hardened individual in the hands of the future foundation.  

How unexpectedly and disgustingly wrong he had been.

Within the fortressed walls of the future foundations medical centre, Byakuya feels the cold cement of the empty hallway bleeding up through his once finely pressed pants. He is not capable of movement, even as he knows- fears-the risk of someone finding him there, playing witness to him acting as weak and stupid as a Togami is, by definition, not.

He does not move. He stays sitting there, curled up pathetically into his side like a child might.

He is breathing too fast, body convulsing shamelessly as he claws at the wall with one hand as he attempts to regain some semblance of control. But that would require him to be able to stop thinking, stop seeing, stop feeling in every atom of his being the flood of images he cannot fight against as they thunder relentlessly against his psyche.  

It is gunfire, a backdrop of his thoughts brought to horrifying life as the surprise flash of ignition surrounds them. It is the way Aoi’s voice, echoing jovially in the dark moments before turning suddenly silent. The intimate smell of blood, a familiar friend, crowding his senses, hands shoving him, bringing him down hard onto harsh asphalt and glass.

He feels the sting of pain in his palms and the silence of the hall fills with mechanical laughter. Just like Hers.

He presses himself as tightly as possible to the wall. He bows his head into his knees, shamefully hiding his lack of control over his emotions from – from an empty hallway, from the ghosts of his disappointed ancestors, from the monster wearing a teenage girl’s skin. From himself.

He’s fine. Not even really injured, only the grazing on his hands to show from the mess of that last mission. Everyone else escaped with similar damage, even Aoi who, for a moment he had feared—no, he didn’t fear, was concerned in a practical manner over their most physically capable team member—had been injured far worse.  So he had no reason, none at all, to be collapsing and hyperventilating in public hallways.

He struggles to remove his glasses, his hands shaking and his head unwilling to remove itself from between his knees. He cannot have them breaking, the way a fine lady may break a glass, when she is consumed with hysterics. As he himself is. The shuddering, tight vice of wayward emotion is swallowing Byakuya whole.

There can be no evidence of his weakness.

He has not yet allowed his dignity to betray him enough to let tears to flow but they threaten, distorting the world even further as his glasses remain clenched in his fist. The first tear he lets spill will be the first drop towards the death of the Togami.

He doesn’t notice until it is too late, until a familiar panic stricken voice pierces the relative quiet of his hiding place.

“B-Byakuya!”

Makoto approaches him at nearly a run from the end of the hallway, worry and concern radiating from every line of his body. A mixture of fear, anger, and shame causes Byakuya’s next panicked action. Something he had always thought himself so above.

“GO AWAY! Don’t you dare get any c-closer-”

His voice hitches high and unsteady, breaking in the middle and cutting his warning off. Makoto, to his limited credit, does stop but he doesn’t leave. He looks down at him, at the great Byakuya Togami, heir of the Togami conglomerate, with concern and worry and pity.

Byakuya is still shaking, his eyes are still on the cusp of watering, but the shame and anger that bled into him, ripping him apart…they now have a new target. Makoto needs to not be looking at him like that. In fact he needs to not be here at all, the fatal witness to Byakuya Togami’s fall from grace.

Again.

Those big hazel eyes are staring straight through him and he is strung tight with tension. Makoto’s voice is low and carrying when he finally speaks.

“Byakuya…are you injured? I heard the doctors say you were fine but…Is there something wrong?”

Byakuya manages to twist his face into a sneer, “Oh? You think you have any right to question me? Know your place commoner…I’m perfectly fine and it is None Of Your Business.”

He enunciates those last words carefully and angrily, putting as much vitriol into them as he can muster.

Makoto flinches back, presumably at his tone, potentially at his most-likely deranged expression. Despite that, Makoto’s expression only becomes more intense in its concern and he shuffles forward along the floor.

“I’m your friend Byakuya…Of course I’d think it’s alright for me to ask if you’re okay. Which I still don’t think you are, by the way. You know it’s really not good to hide an injury-”

“I do not need your help or your concern and you need to stop looking at me like that!”

“Wha- What? Byakuya—“

“Shut up! Don’t touch me!”

The sound of flesh hitting flesh resounds through the corridor, as loud as thunder. A ragged gasp follows shortly after. Byakuya cannot tell whether it is him or Makoto that it comes from. Time seems frozen to him and the ringing in his ears is so loud.  

Makoto shrinks back, cheek already turning into the faint red outline of a hand.

Byakuya didn’t mean to hit him, hadn’t meant to rebuff him in so physical—so crude— a way. He had panicked. Makoto had come too close, whether to calm him or check him for an injury he didn’t know, but it had been too close to touching, to dispensing his pity and sullying a Togami with soft, condescending care.  

There is a moment of tense unhappy silence.

“I’m sorry”

What.

“For getting in your space when you didn’t want me to…and I guess for just not leaving you alone...I kinda obviously didn’t help huh?” Makoto laughs that little self-deprecating laugh of his, soft and self-conscious.

Byakuya doesn’t understand why Makoto’s the one apologising. Except he does, and it is truly an un-intelligent and un-Togami-like thing to be surprised. Of course Makoto would apologise. It was his fault for not respecting Byakuya’s warnings and personal space. It is a commoners place to take the blame for such situations.

Even if he had also been rightfully concerned over his…friend’s… well-being, and had done what was in Makoto’s nature to do; poke his nose where it doesn’t belong and persistently and insufferably attempt to help.

He shouldn’t have slapped him. It was base and unnecessary, and the fact he was overcome with embarrassment and anger does not sound as good of a justification as he thought it should.

“You’re still not leaving.” Byakuya manages to say it clearly despite the cottony feel of his mouth and his stubborn prides insistence, despite feeling as though he has been shocked into a clearer state of mind.

“I know…” Makoto sighs and in that moment his exhaustion reveals itself. It reminds Byakuya that it probably wasn’t just him affected by the mission. That of course Makoto, with all his infinite capacity to care, would most likely be suffering too.

“I just apologised for it but…I’m still worried about you. I don’t want to abandon a friend when they’re hurting…Sorry. Again. ”

“I’m not injured.”

“H-huh?”

“Don’t stutter, it’s unseemly,” he rebukes, albeit a little weakly. It seems the emotional weakness he has suffered was now going to leech his physical strength as well.  “…I was not injured; the doctors were correct. So, you have no reason for concern. I am utterly physically fine.”

“You’re not though; you’re half collapsed in a hallway shaking as hard as a leaf.”

“….I was… more affected by our last mission than I thought. It was nothing, so stop worrying about it.”

It is through gritted teeth that byakuya manages to admit this, the only consolation being that it will make Makoto leave faster and stop bothering him. Then he can go back to his quarters and try to forget all about this moment of weakness

He’s wrong, of course. Makoto goes sharp eyed and more wary than before, and does not look at all satisfied or happy with his answer.

“That’s not nothing, Byakuya. If it was nothing you wouldn’t be so upset. I won’t-“ Byakuya had gone to speak, to rebuke his accusations however accurate they were, but Makoto, Naegi Makoto the ultimate pushover, had put up a hand as though to silence him and continued. “I won’t push you about it…But, if it keeps happening or if it has been happening for a while already, you should…well you should probably talk to someone. I’m not saying it has to be me or anything! They have a great psyche department here, they’re all really nice, and well, you could always talk to one of the others too.”

Makoto must see Byakuya grimace because he laughs a little, that same self-deprecating laugh like he understands but is too self-conscious to voice it. He doesn’t stop though.

“But the point is, that you should talk to someone. I found…that it helped me, when I was getting flash backs to our time in the…to when we were in hope’s peak, to talk to someone. It helped to share some of the load.”

He smiles at him then, small and sad and unfathomably warm.

Byakuya…he feels on one hand disgust at this attempt to sympathise and understand each other as equals. It was against everything his personal code stood for, aloofness and superiority above all else.

But he is also tired. Physically, from the suppression of his earlier panic attack and emotionally…the toll from the flash backs, from the memories and dreams, were starting to wear on him. His pride, His stubborn unending pride that he carries like a shield, would normally never allow such thoughts but Makoto…Stupid, soft Makoto and the utter embarrassment of being seen like that had him considering alternate measures than repression.

“Ha, you are truly insufferable you know. They shouldn’t be calling you the ultimate hope, more like the ultimate busy-body.” He sighs long and low as Makoto makes an awkward little noise and rubs the back of his head shyly.

“I suppose that’s an important part of the job, being nosy.” He smiles again, a little brighter it seems now that Byakuya is in a better mood. He starts the arduous job of attempting to pull himself upright again, re-adjusting his glasses on his face as he does. Makoto springs up a moment before him and offers his hand in the universal symbol of help.

Byakuya smacks it away, lightly and a little cautiously, and scowls up at him. “I am not a child Makoto, I do not need your help getting up. I have already had enough of your pity for one evening.”

“A-ah, sorry-”

“Although,” and Byakuya allows a little slyness to slip through his tone at this juncture, “I feel if you truly want to ‘help’, you should do as your station in life dictates and be subservient to me.”

“Uum, what--?”

“I desire a glass of fresh spring water Makoto. Go fetch it.”

The look of incredulous shock on Makoto’s face is refreshing, almost as refreshing as that water will be on his parched throat. Byakuya levels him with an appropriate glare and makes a questioning little, “hm?” before Makoto seems to find him serious and puts on a more…bashful expression.

“Sure thing, Byakuya. Do you want me to bring it to you here..?”

“No, you dullard. I would like it in my room. I expect it in 5 minutes, don’t make me wait.”

Laughing a little, Makoto sets off.

Byakuya watches him until he turns the corner. Dark thoughts leer at him from the back of his mind, but they do not settle.

Talking to Makoto, even as disastrously as it had gone, had in fact made Byakuya feel better. Those weighty considerations were a future problem now.

The thoughts still sting, but perhaps in the way that the first touch of antiseptic to a wound stings.

A painful but healing touch.