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overtaken-stream · 11 months ago

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C0ok Me a Meal, Make Me Starve.

Akutsu Nagisa x Gn!Artist!Reader

This goes out to all 5 Akutsu fans bc I love jerks. + It's been a while since I've read Ao Ashi and I apologize for any mischaracterization. Akutsu is one of my favorite characters in the whole wide world of sports manga/anime. Also, it's a self-insert which I feel slightly embarrassed about and It's my experience as an artist. If you find any pronouns that aren't gn please feel free to correct me.

Warnings: Negative self-talk, artist pain, art block(?)

He's somebody that you would consider closest to you, an individual who one would not consider describing with pleasing words, he looks ragged like a cheap brush on all sides sealed with plastic and packed in a tight box, his personality dry, in need of honey water. The long lips spew honesty like no man you've seen, it drags the pigment picked by the brush across a thin paper, dooming it to dissolve under the colors.

He carries no kindness in him. Is what one would say, without knowing more than the outer layer of the said individual. You on the other hand would say that he emits honesty with no kindness. Some would describe truth without empathy as brutality.

His rugged exterior is a shell that you're able to barely imitate on a piece of paper, the pencil sketches of the defender (that are nowhere near good enough compared to the real example) cover the pages of a notebook, messily erased pencil routes divide and combine to create what you consider to be the best replica among other failed poses and portraits that're left unfinished.

You sit alone on a bench, outside the practice domain of footballers, with knees touching under the uniform as the gentle breeze of spring dances in the meadows, carrying with it the sounds of laughter and gazes of interest, all directed at the field where ball means the world to boys with big ambitions.

Among them lies the prey to your infatuation. Your observing eyes are left overlooked between the other groups crowding around the fence, it lays low as the sportsmen exercise, and the scratches of pencils go unheard by anyone who isn't looking directly at them.

Erasers are doing a poor job of concealing blunders, little missteps that continue to pile up as time passes and whistles blow. They stay, becoming a part of something you never wanted it to be a part of, unnerving eyes stare at the scratchy lines. The sounds around you flatten, continuing as the pencil rests between your fingers, shouting comes from behind the fence signaling the start of the game, however, the world is subtle, and blurry colors of the background slowly disappear from your view, until the notebook and you remain. A notebook whose pages contain countless figures of one particular fellow, in all the directions you could manage to witness. A slow sigh leaves your lips as you turn the pages.

One page;

Two;

Three.

The ringing in your ears picks up its intensity, heartbeat fastens.

It's hard to put the feelings into words, the bubble of disdain that engulfs you only shrinks as you think. Why is it that you are lacking? Was it the months that went by with the notebook collecting dust on the cover? Forgotten on a shelf with the same pencils that await you? Was it the texture or have you finally reached the deep end? Is it alright for you to blame the school for your idleness?

The tip of the pencil drags down the side of the paper, it leaves a lame stripe behind.

Are you an artist? If you are, then why can't you draw a line? Why is it so hard to even the space between the eyes? Why is the jaw drawn the way it is? Why is it that cheeks seem high and mouth too low? Why the thick lines? Why are those ugly features consistent in your art while the beauty and inspiration of others, that you try to sow in your style always fade away?

You conclude. Akutsu is beyond your skills to portray, even if he was the person who pushed you out of your art block, who motivated you to pick up the pen again, who you proceeded to sketch when the lesson was too monotonous to pay any attention to. He'll never know of your thoughts, you hope he'll never know, after all, Akutsu was never one to meddle in others' privacy too much. There's a line friends don't cross and Akutsu makes sure to never stay too close to it, for too long.

There should be boldness inside of you, and ambition to pursue art more, but the countless lessons and rules of reality, of adulthood leave no fuel for effectiveness to take place. Your notebook eats away at you, spitting nothing but guilt on the way, years of work and practice are slowly slipping through the gaps of muscle.

It's painful losing yourself, betraying it for something you're not even sure brings you happiness on this planet. It's a simple wish to be bold, more angry, like Akutsu, to prove something and be someone who does one thing expertly. but it seems so far away from you, who did nothing as the light of ambition gave out somewhere along your development.

You wish you had a heart like Akutsu, forever shackled by hobbies he'll never get tired of. But as always, there is a welded fence in between, keeping a distance, thus forever dooming you to goggle over a man you admire.

Is it love? Why does it not feel like it? Are you in love? No... Or are you? It's a question you will not know the answer until you spend more time with the fellow. Even then, you're certain of the rejection. This one-sided obsession will only be a negative trait, that will prove just how unacceptable your behavior truly is. An eerie attitude towards (who you consider) your friend, could only give birth to a quicksand of shame that'll swallow you whole before ever confessing your feelings.

A loud chatter of voices infiltrates your depressive bubble, slowly yet sharply passing by your eardrum until the gloaming atmosphere you got lost in fades away. With no extra weight, the air seems easier to take in. The colors slowly bleed back into your vision as the wind blows gently across your school uniform.

With a clear head, you stare at the unfinished draft presented on the paper, all with shaven heads and tense looks. The silhouette of number four adorns their chests and stretches over the fold of a football uniform like a prize, all in different positions. Where you're sitting, everyone would guess his identity. Nervousness aside, you should leave before anyone calls you out for being a creep.

Even if you forgot to take into account that the crowd has disappeared, only few remain to watch the players do their post-game stretches, you're unsteady, fearful of the hidden eyes. Gathering the energy to stand up and trying not to mind the electric pain that sprouts through your knee is becoming harder and harder to conceal every time you stand, legs demand exercise but your hands hold the evidence, persuasion of a dream you're trying to relive using the digits you were born with.

By the time you close the two halves of the notebook a hand lands on your head, it relaxes between your hair, heavy and bigger than average, their fingers are separated, thumb lands on your temple as the middle finger touches your forehead from behind. Its grip strengthens for a couple of seconds before letting go of the pressure and tension lifts off of your shoulders, the rough grasp it had left behind slightly messy strands for you to fix. You can't bring yourself to correct it.

``Where do you think you're going?`` The flat voice would send butterflies in your belly if it weren't for the expression adoring the holder's face, stable and shielded, anger is nowhere to be seen. You scramble for words to answer him.

``Don't tell me you were leaving.`` Because of course, you would forget that the reason why you were here in the first place, was to wait for him. He with a blue uniform and a heavy bag on his shoulder that has nothing but hard work to show.

His long eyes stare down at you with sharpness, awaiting your answer.

``I was... Trying to stretch my legs, I spent a lot of time sitting and watching you... A-and your team play y'know.`` so much yous in one sentence. How does The Akutsu deal with you...?

His eyes close before letting out a loud sigh. Akutsu must be annoyed, in his shoes you would certainly be if a friend almost left and forgot about you.

``C'mon, let's go.`` His voice is much softer as your eyes watch him turn without looking back, however before he can call out once again, you follow after his lead, walking just behind him. Akutsu was never a patient man.

You stare at his back as you always do, wondering, eyeing. If only he knew how much you think of him every day, dreaming about scenarios that have almost no chance of coming true, with a speedy heart and red hue to your face. Maybe he knows but doesn't tell. In that case, you're thankful for his company, you merely wish you had the bravery needed for this type of stuff. Tolerance if your specialty.

His broad shoulders stop and so do you.

``So.`` confusion overtakes your features as his face slowly turns back to you, a soft grin in tow.

``Where to now?``

Oh. You were the one who wanted to go somewhere weren't you? The amount of time it takes for you to open your lips for an answer, his eyebrow is already raised. You just keep digging your own grave.

Even trying to remember it is difficult, the title of the place is blurry, and the way to it is unreachable. How irresponsible of you.

``I... Forgot, the places name...`` Embarrassment is an emotion you know inside and out. It's a word that describes all of your interactions outside of family members. It's what you feel as you watch his small smile die. You turn to another word that has made home in your vocabulary.

``... I'm sorry.`` disappointed is what you are, in yourself. Surely Akutsu must also be let down, the time you guys spent together is becoming rare these days, and memories are coming to be cherished.

``You seem out of it today, you're alright?`` Akutsu has never had a filter.

``Oh, yeah, it's just...`` That you have been crossing my mind for a couple of days, you are all I think about as I draw a male figure, you are making me blush each instant I replay our moments together where you showed me little bits of yourself.

The excuse that stumbles out of your mouth is a lie you don't even believe in.

``You're a terrible liar.`` Neither does he.

``...`` A sweat travels down your cheek, carrying with it a shiver that dismisses comfort, the color red blooms over your face.

``... Sorry.`` You wonder if you can love someone despite feeling uncomfortable with yourself.

``Stop saying sorry. It's getting on my nerves.`` Barely are you able to hold in another apology as chasms of anxiety overtake your mind, swiftly seeping into your fingertips and making them shake with heartbreak. His harsh words are no foreign from a jab in the heart, making the muscle twist itself as your ribs fail to defend it from your mind. Your tongue is dry, lips are fixed in a line. So ruthless.

As always, you don't have a tongue, it's deep in your stomach somewhere hiding from the real world.

A soft exhale is heard as he straightens his back.

``Have you eaten yet?`` His eyes turn to the road ahead before continuing to move, your body moves along with him, never showing the hurt his harsh demeanor brings. Your silence is accepted as an answer.

``I have some leftovers we can eat.`` He always has ingredients lying around waiting for you to come over so they can be cooked. Never can he find any leftovers to warm up and eat. It's a harmless lie, a manner he developed when you slipped into his life. A simple gesture that he only shares with you. Seeing you enjoy his cooking is pleasing.

``... Alright...`` He doesn't want you to hide away, doesn't want you to apologize for being messy and clumsy. It's a dance he knows by heart, a dance you are not even acquainted with.

He hopes that someday you acknowledge it.

#ao ashi #ao ashi x reader #akutsu nagisa #akutsu nagisa x reader #.my writing.#anime #anime x reader

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cherry-valentine · 2 years ago

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Fall 2022 Anime

Boku no Hero Academia Season 6 is the first season I’ve come into having already read the manga. Halfway through last season, I started reading the manga and have now caught up, so this is my first time starting a season while knowing exactly what’s going to happen. A plot summary seems silly at this point, so I’ll skip right to the meat of this write-up. In my opinion, the War Arc covered in this season is where the story peaked. This is by far my favorite arc, but it also ushers in some of the worst writing decisions I’ve ever seen in a series this popular. Luckily those baffling choices come in late enough in this arc that they don’t ruin it (they just ruin the rest of the series lol). I’ve long had a love-hate relationship with this show, because I enjoy it and it does a lot of things well (and the things it does well, it does really REALLY well), but it also pisses me off in a lot of ways (the treatment of the lady characters overall is my biggest gripe, though I will admit that this improves the longer the series goes on). But this season? So far? It’s fantastic. The animation is great, as usual. The fights are exciting, the little snippets of comedy (this is an overall serious arc though) are on point. This is also the arc that best displays the dark side of hero society, the corruption, the forgotten victims, the people who have suffered in this sort of world, which is fascinating. Shigaraki in particular makes an excellent villain, and that’s all I’m going to say about him to avoid manga spoilers (I could, and maybe will, write an entire essay about his character and how it’s developed in the manga). Since this arc is so damn good, BNHA is at the top of my list this season. A first for this series!

Blue Lock is a new sports anime, this one about soccer. Last season, while watching Ao Ashi (another soccer anime), I kept seeing Blue Lock mentioned in the comments as a “better soccer series”, and that it was getting an anime. Well here it is. While I do appreciate a good, straightforward sports anime like Ao Ashi, these days a sports anime has to stand out in some way to get me excited about it. Blue Lock stands out in two main ways: the high production values that give it outstanding visuals, and the absolutely bonkers premise (all the best high school strikers in Japan are gathered up, told to live 24/7 in a state of the art training camp, and are weeded out through grueling matches against each other and are encouraged to be traitorous assholes, all to arrive at one boy left to be the best striker in Japan). Right away, it separates itself from other sports anime with that setup. It effectively cuts out any and all drama that doesn’t involve the sport. These guys don’t go to school, so there are no scenes of them in class or interacting with characters not on their “team”. No scenes at home, involving family members. They don’t even have team managers or coaches. It really does boil the entire story down to these guys playing soccer. That’s a pretty bold move, but it pays off. And going back to those visuals, the animation quality is amazing. The character designs are vivid and interesting. The colors are just beautiful. The only complaint I have in this area is that the backgrounds are all pretty drab. This makes sense in context (as they’re living in a training facility), and actually might be a good thing, as it makes the colorful characters stand out even more. Speaking of which, all of them are fun, and the main character Isagi is easy to root for, even when his inner jerk is dragged out. All in all, Blue Lock is one of the better sports anime I’ve seen in a while.

Yowamushi Pedal has a new season. Watching it made me realize how much I missed this batshit crazy show. It’s a sports anime about bicycle racing, and it ranks just under Prince of Tennis as being one of the most unrealistic sports anime I’ve seen. From the guy who has named his pecs Andy and Frank (and literally talks to them, and they literally warn him of dangers!) to the skinny little guy who can immediately expand his torso like a balloon (something about being able to expand his lungs but it looks hilarious), to the tendency several riders have to go into a frenzy and race at top speed with their tongues hanging out of their heads (yes, dangle your tongues out while bicycling very fast through the mountains! Totally not a terrible idea!). Then there are the moments when a rider from one of the teams has to drop out of the race after doing something cool, for the benefit of the team (basically sacrificing himself). These are treated with all the drama and severity of literal death scenes, and it’s one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. But above all of this, there’s the gloriously creepy villain Midousuji, who is hands-down the best villain in sports anime history. He’s gross and terrible and downright monstrous, but damn if he isn’t the most entertaining character in the show. The animation is fine, but the character designs are unique. This is a weird anime, but it’s never boring! Go into it expecting a wild, weird, fun time, and you won’t be disappointed.

Spy x Family is on its second cour, and there’s not much more I can say about it than I did a couple of seasons back. Following a highly skilled spy as he puts together a fake family consisting of a telepathic child, a wife who is a secret assassin, and now a precognitive dog, the show is adorable and very funny. The animation is stellar, with extremely expressive faces, lovely backgrounds, and characters that never fail to stay on model. It’s a little more fast paced than the usual “soothing feel good” anime, but for me it still falls into that category. Though the stakes are occasionally high (with characters being in actual mortal danger), the overall soft tone of this series assures us that the threats will always be neutralized, so there’s little tension in that regard. The charm of the show lies in its super likable cast and wonderful visuals. High on my watch list.

Raven of the Inner Palace is a unique series about a certain mysterious consort to the emperor in ancient China. Though she has the title of consort, she has little contact with the emperor and instead uses her magical powers to solve mysteries around the palace, talk to the dead, help spirits cross over, etc. Of course, when the emperor meets her, he decides to become her friend. The show is basically about their mystery-solving adventures with an ever expanding cast of support characters. It’s a relatively simple setup, but the ancient Chinese setting gives it a specific charm. The art is gorgeous, with breathtaking clothing designs and beautiful scenery. The music is also a high point, with excellent opening/ending themes and background songs. The Raven consort herself, called Shouxue, is an interesting character. She’s a bit of a tsundere, but in this case her standoffish attitude makes sense for the plot (she has a tragic backstory that necessitates being wary of others, especially the emperor). She softens as the series moves along, but she remains a powerful character. Her growing relationship with the emperor isn’t exactly original (of course they’re going to end up falling in love at some point - I can predict that without reading summaries of the light novels this is based on), but they have enough chemistry to make them fun to watch regardless. This is a slower-paced show than most of the other anime I’m watching this season, and it feels like a breath of fresh air.

Mobile Suit Gundam The Witch From Mercury could be called “the show that pissed off a thousand fanboys”, with a lot of people calling it “woke Gundam”. Apparently, if you have a female protagonist in a Gundam tv series for the first time since the franchise began in the 70‘s, it’s automatically woke (never mind that Tomino has wanted to have a female protagonist since the 90‘s). Add to that the *possibility* of a lesbian couple (and to be honest I don’t think the series will have the guts to follow through with it) and the fact that female characters in general seem to have larger and more important roles in the story, and you have an army of angry manchildren on your hands. In all seriousness, the show does have a different vibe from most previous Gundam series (but not all). If I had to choose its closest relative, I’d say its Reconguista in G, with its school-setting and relaxed atmosphere for the first chunk of the series. Most hilarious to me are the people assuming this series won’t get “serious” and have actual mobile suit battles (as opposed to the mobile suit “duels” that take place at the school). I mean, are they just pretending the prologue episode and all the shadowy political machinations don’t exist? Regardless, the show is great so far and would be an excellent starting point for people who never really got into Gundam but are curious about it. The animation is gorgeous and the plot is (at least for now) easy to follow. The two female leads are likable and have great chemistry. And yeah, it’s basically “Utena with giant robots”. If you’ve watched Utena, you’ll be the embodiment of that Leonardo Dicaprio meme where he’s pointing at the screen while you watch the first couple of episodes. But hey, if a plot setup is good, why not use it again in a different setting? Hell, let’s have Utena in feudal Japan! Utena in the wild west! Utena in a zombie apocalypse! I’m here for it.

To Your Eternity Season 2 opened on a surprisingly weak note for such an excellent series, but it’s already sorted itself out. The show follows an immortal entity called Fushi who can take the form of any living being it comes into contact with (after that being has died). Fushi most often uses (and generally prefers) the form of a young man, so I’ll be using he/him to refer to the entitiy. The series is, basically, about Fushi moving through the world and learning about life while also fighting creatures called the Nockers that keep attacking him for unknown reasons (most often harming the humans around him in frankly horrific ways). Each person that Fushi comes to know eventually becomes another form he can take (as he is immortal, of course he outlives everyone). The interesting thing is that he can use whatever skills that person (or creature) had, leading to at least one person spending years cultivating certain skills so that Fushi would have access to them after she dies. Unlike with season one, season two skips large chunks of time, several generations in a single episode at one point. At first, I was a little annoyed that we were not getting to spend much time with the characters (in one infuriating case, a major character from season one returns only to almost immediately die). Season one’s emotional beats were so powerful because it let us get to know and grow to love the human characters before they inevitably died. But! Thankfully, season two has now settled into a story arc and is letting us grow to love a new set of characters. And yes, they will eventually die, like always, but the point of the story isn’t “will these characters die or not?”, it’s “what effect will these characters ultimately have on Fushi?”. And figuring that out is what makes the series so endearing.

Golden Kamuy has a new season (I think this is season four, but honestly it’s hard to keep up with all these shows after they get past season two). From the start of season one, this has been one of my favorite modern anime series. It has a strong plot, unique character designs, a compelling setting, and some of the most bizarre but charming humor I’ve come across. It’s refreshing in the way it never sexualizes its female characters, but instead chooses to objectify its large assortment of buff, handsome male characters with frequent nude scenes that seem to linger on their well-toned bodies. Despite this, the show is firmly seinen (aimed at an adult male audience). It’s actually been fun to watch the guys in the comments questioning their sexuality in real time. I don’t care what your sexuality is, you’re going to walk away from this show with at least a minor crush on Ogata or Sugimoto. Probably both. Fanservice aside, the show is just wild at times. It can get brutally gory, then it can be hilarious, then it can make you cry. It has a Gintama-like quality in that it does lots of different things very well. If you’re not watching this series, you’re missing out (something I think I’ve said about it before, but it bears repeating).

Chainsaw Man is definitely this season’s most hyped show. I had avoided the manga because, just from looking at the covers and some other art, it looked like it was full of unnecessary fanservice and that the lady characters were highly sexualized. Before the anime started, I did a little googling to see what the general opinion was. From everything I read, most people (regardless of gender) had generally positive opinions on how the female characters were treated, so I decided to try the anime. The basic setup is that there are creatures called Devils that can embody certain things, like a Gun Devil or a Chainsaw Devil or a Bat Devil. A young man named Denji, who is probably one of the most “down on his luck” protagonists I’ve seen in a long time (he’s broke, orphaned, pratically homeless, practically starving, and has already sold one eye, one kidney, and one testicle just to survive) ends up combining with the only thing he really has in the world: his pet Devil dog. This gives him the power of the Chainsaw Devil, which he can transform into to fight other Devils. He’s quickly recruited by a group of government sanctioned Devil Hunters who are searching for the powerful, menacing Gun Devil. The setup sounds like typical shounen action fare, but the series goes a bit darker than I expected fairly early on, and maintains a unique atmosphere. Denji is fun to root for just because he came from such a humble place, but his lack of social skills makes him come across as a jerk at times. It’s understandable, given his background. Every shounen action series has its own “thirst trap” character that’s super popular with the ladies in the audience, and this one has Aki. The anime wisely spends the majority of its budget on subtle little movements he makes, like lighting a cigarette or taking a drink of coffee. I think there’s a whole animation team dedicated to the flow of his hair when he wears it down. As there should be. Overall, the series has a strange vibe to it but it’s highly entertaining.

Best of Season:

Best New Show: Blue Lock Best Opening Theme: Golden Kamuy Best Ending Theme: Spy x Family Best New Male Character: Isagi (Blue Lock) Best New Female Character: Shouxue (Raven of the Inner Palace)

#Anime Reviews #Anime Recommendations #Seasonal Anime #Fall 2022 Anime #Text #Chainsaw Man #Golden Kamuy #Blue Lock #Spy x Family #Yowamushi Pedal

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variabels · 1 year ago

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Tbh I feel like the main distinction between sports anime is actually realistic vs unrealistic/battle shounen. So like Kurokos vs Haikyuus.

I’d say someone who enjoyed sk8 is more likely to enjoy KnB and BL over Haikyuu or YoI because they’re more focused on just being cool and not caring about realism or presenting the sport in a realistic way, the vibes are just more similar since they focus on hype and over-the-top characters over realism.

KnB has a character driven main plot. KnB has a huge focus on the mentality of being at the top and with Kuroko being the protagonist, his plot line is saving the miragen from themselves while Kagami, the deuteragonist, is the one who gets the cliché sports protag plot line and is the only one who can compete with the miragen. The protagonist/deuteragonist duo have to be Kuroko and Kagami otherwise, the main plot with the miragen doesn’t happen. There is a huge focus on how badly being at the top has affected the miragen and how Kuroko is happier with a team he can trust and is friends with. The focus on character development is also very important for the rematches with Kise, Midorima and Aomine. Just because the competition aspect is important doesn’t mean it isn’t character-driven. Meanwhile the sport is treated like a battle shounen power system, so I wouldn’t call it sports-driven when the sport could be changed into just battles without changing the plot much.

Meanwhile, Haikyuu has a shit ton of focus in trying to present its sports in a realistic way. There’s so much focus on volleyball, you’d only be able to replace it with a similar sport. However you could probably swap Hinata as the protag with anyone else from Karasuno since the main plot before the time skip is mainly just about getting better at the sport and trying to win the tournament. I’m not saying Haikyuu isn’t a character driven story (almost every sports anime is a character driven story since they almost all have the same tournament arc plotline), but it’s much more sports-driven than Kuroko.

Tbh you can usually distinguish the two types of sports anime just from a glance. Usually unrealistic shade colors is gonna be an unrealistic sports anime whereas more realistic hair colors lean towards a more realistic anime. It’s also possible for a sports anime to start somewhat realistically before becoming whatever the fuck Prince of Tennis became lmao.

Unrealistic: Blue Lock, Kuroko no Basuke, Sk8, Keijo, Inazuma Eleven, Prince of Tennis

Realistic: Haikyuu, Ao Ashi, Ping Pong, Yuri on Ice, Blue Box (it’s more of a romance than sports manga tho), Two on Ice

Idk where the fuck Free would go tho. I think it’s just its own thing. It’s a fanservice anime before it’s a sport anime. Tbh the unrealistic-realistic thing is a spectrum.

As someone who’s watched a lot of sports anime, I have noticed that there are essentially two types of it:

Sports-driven – focuses on winning, competing, and the technical aspects of the game. Discusses a lot about how you can improve as a player. Character development is often related to skills development. Competitions are of utmost importance.

Examples: Blue Lock, Kuroko no Basuke

Character-driven – focuses on being able to play the game with friends, making memories, and getting over one’s personal issues. Competitions are secondary to the show’s overall theme and/or the main character’s principles.

Examples: Haikyuu, Sk8 the Infinity, Bakuten

Although I gave examples, these categories aren’t exactly clear-cut. Most shows are a mix of both, but with a preference on one over the other.

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