#anyways. me when he sends me downtown lights (I hadn’t heard it in awhile)

[swirlingyouintomypoems]

OH WHAT A WAY TO DIE

[jazararose]

Ghosted

One-shot based around the song Ghostin’ by Ariana Grande. I really love that song. Very beautiful, very sad. This fic is also sad, has character death and mention of drug use.

"Inuyasha!" It was the splash heard around the world. The dark haired girl came up from the pool stuttering and slapping her hair out of her face. She wanted to pout and be angry, but then she saw his face. Cheeks wide and tinted pink, his arms hugging his middle tightly. His laugh was contagious as the people around began to join in on his glee.

Though his smile was brilliant, it was really his eyes. How could she stay mad when his were lit from the inside out with his mirth. Instead of being angry she too began to laugh. Slowly she swam to the edge and offered her hand. He'd thrown her in so, the least he could do was help her out. When they connected it only to took her a second to pull him in.

Now it was his turn to sputter and flail. He thought about pouting, just to make her feel bad, but her laugh made him pause. Her eyes stopped him in his tracks. He didn't realize eyes could be so...deep. Or so warm.

"Yeah yeah, have your fun wench I'm outta here." He went to pull himself out of the pool, but her cool slick hands on his shoulders stopped him.

"Don't be grumpy." She tweaked his nose like a kid, and he wanted to glare at her and be menacing. Instead his lips came into a pout and she continued to squeal over how cute he was.

"You're so annoying." He said with a grin.

"Aren't I so lucky that you love me anyway?" It was scary. The overwhelming feeling he had to kiss her, scared him. Before he could think or act, he dunked her head under the water.

And so began the epic splash fight of 2013.

7 years later...

"Sorry for your loss." Said the faceless person for the umpteenth time. Inuyasha rubbed his face, doing his best to hold in his sigh. He gave a weak smile when the same person gave him a clap on the shoulder. Probably meant to be comforting no doubt, but it only served to further irritate the young man.

It'd been 90 minutes of this torment. The smiling, the talking, the hand shaking. He was over it. He sighed again. The funeral wasn't even until tomorrow, this was just the viewing for family, friends, and other members of the community.

"Yash!" He looked up at that, the first greeting to actually catch his attention in a while.

"Sup, Miro." The two embraced, you know in that manly way where they only use one arm. "Hi Sango." He said turning to the brunette at his buddy's side.

"I'm so sorry Yash." Sango stood on the tips of her toes to wrap her arms around Inuyasha's neck. He met her in the middle and they stayed like that for awhile. Sango was rubbing his back and he took a long shuttering breath before pulling back.

"Do you want to see her?" He said quietly. This was the hard part. The part he was glad Ms. Higurashi allowed him to do privately. He'd come early so he could be alone with her.

Gingerly he took Sango's arm and they walked towards the silver casket. It was tasteful, with her name and little angels and flowers carved into the sides.

"I can't believe this is happening." Her voice slowly crumbling as she continued to speak. She reached out to touch her friend's face. Soft, still plump, just a little pale. Her hair had been brushed, curled, and brushed again. "She looks beautiful."

"Yeah, I think so too." As so it went like that for another 90 minuted before things started to clear and people began to go home. Tomorrow they'd all be back for the last hurray. Their last time to see her before she was really gone, truly out of reach.

Tomorrow they were burying Kagome Higurashi. His person. His other half. His best friend.

The drive home was mechanical, monotonous. By the time he opened and shut the door to his apartment, his tie had been severely undone and he was out of his shoes. He hated wearing suits. They were thick and stuffy. He could hear water sloshing as he walked passed the bathroom.

It took him 5 minutes to change, light a cigarette and make a drink.

"You know I hate it when you smoke." He didn't turn to look behind him. A pair of slim arms fell over his shoulders and came to circle his neck gently. A warm, soft kiss was placed on his cheek.

"Sorry." Usually he'd go to stuff it out, but he took a long drag. His fiancee came around to sit on his lap. Her hair was pulled up, but some droplets from the tub had run down the strands onto her neck. She smelled liked lavender. It was her go to nighttime scent.

"You doing okay?" She put her hands on his cheeks to make them eye level, and the guilt gnawed on his heart. She looked tired, worried. She was worried about him.

"As okay as I can be. Her family is moving...quickly. She's barely been dead a week." Much to his fiancee's dismay he lit another cigarette when the first had been reduced to nothing. She also noticed that he brought the bottle on the balcony. It was always a long night when he brought the bottle on the balcony.

"Do you want me to stay?"

"Nah. Get some sleep, the funeral is in the morning. You coming with me?"

"Of course." She gave him a lingering kiss as she got up to leave. Sending him one last desperate look before turning in. Kicking his legs up on the railing and reclining in his seat, Inuyasha got comfy. He felt bad for making Kikyou sad and making her worry. He knew she hated going to bed alone, knew even more she hated waking up alone, but it couldn't be helped.

It had only been an hour or so since the viewing, but already Inuyasha missed her face. He needed to see her, see her smile and her eyes. The picture he scrolled to was one of his favorites. It was a couple years back.

Back when everything was still good.

Year 2016

It wasn't the knocking, that finally got Inuyasha out of bed, but the incessant ringing of his apartment bell. He flung his covers in frustration, anger pronouncing every single one of his steps.

"What!" He said in growl. He was going to say more, but Kagome was standing his hallway. Wearing fishnets, shorts that looked almost like underwear, and a top that barely covered her nipples. She was smiling widely, deep blue lipstick making her appear hypothermic. Though it did complete her silver eye shadow and the buckets of glitter she had clearly dumped on herself.

"Kagome what are you wearing?" She still hadn't answered him even after pushing her way in. Steadily she made her way to his closet, haphazardly throwing his laundry about his room. "Hello?" He said impatiently.

"I'm a rave babe Inuyasha. I've been dying to check out the EDM scene. There's a DJ playing at Webz tonight you gotta come with me."

"I'm so confused, Kagome I was sleeping."

"Key word is was. Now, we're raving. Luckily for you all you need are shorts, leave the shirt off handsome." She gave him a wink that had him blushing to his toes and 30 minutes later they were standing in front of Webz. A new club that opened up downtown almost 6 months ago. Inuyasha hadn't heard too many good things about this place. It was a little too dark and grungy for his tastes.

Soon they were drinking and dancing, or headbanging as Kagome called it. He watched as the sweat traveled down Kagome's back, down to her shorts where her hips and ass swayed to the beat. He found himself entranced as Kagome threw her head to and fro, her hair swinging wildly about her. She laughed and Inuyasha fell in love with how free she looked.

"C'mon! Loosen up!" Soon his hair was wild too and his back was sweaty. He was grateful Kagome made him ditch the shirt. Once they got into the crowd things got hot. Kagome tapped him on the shoulder and when he bent down she continued to push him, so she could climb on his shoulders. Kagome continued to dance as he kept a firm grip on her thighs.

When they leave the club it's three am and Inuyasha doesn't know how he let Kagome convince him to leave his place. He made them instant ramen and let Kagome borrow one of his shirts. That night Inuyasha went to sleep with his ears ringing and his body spinning.

A ghost of a smile plays across his lips. In the picture Kagome was still on his shoulders. Her eyes were squinted as she stuck out her tongue. His eyes were closed and his mouth was wide like he had just finished yelling 'yay' to the photographer.

The tears hit his phone, before he could stop them. He was tired of crying, but it seemed to be all he could do these days. Taking the last swig of his drink Inuyasha made his way inside. Though his thoughts were consumed of Kagome, he knew Kikyou could bring him some peace. He got in the bed and Kikyou instantly turned to embrace him.

She was always waiting.

He didn't mean to start crying again. He didn't mean to keep her awake. Kikyou didn't complain. She held hold him closer, kissed his cheeks and then his lips. Slowly she melted into him, giving him all he could take. She wanted him to feel good. She wanted him to feel loved. She cradled his head to her chest when they parted.

"I'm sorry." He said again. He'd been doing a lot of apologizing lately.

"Don't worry. We'll get through this."

Day of the funeral

It was a beautiful day. The funeral home was covered top to bottom in flowers. Kagome's grandfather was the priest overseeing the service. Several people including Kagome's mother got on the podium to speak. Ms. Higurashi had to stop and compose herself, but she finished. Now it was his turn. He'd tried to get out of it, but alas here he was. Standing in front of everyone, all their eyes on him.

All he could see was Kagome. Her beautiful hands folded over her beautiful dress as she laid in her beautiful coffin. What the fuck was he supposed to say? In an instant Kikyou was there, holding his hand and giving him an encouraging look. This was better, it felt better not to be alone.

"I don't have a lot to say," he started, "if you know me you know I don't do this. I don't speak to people, I don't hang out with people. Hell if you really know me then you know I barely like people." That got a small chuckle from the crowd. He was happy to make them laugh, but he was only saying the truth. He knew Kagome would agree.

"When I was nine my parents died in a boating accident. In a year I moved across the country to live with my grandmother and I started going to a new school. The teacher, Mrs. Oliander, made me stand in front of the class and introduce myself. While I was talking a kid threw a spit ball that hit me right in the eye. Everyone laughed, and a second later everyone went silent because Kagome stood up and punched that kid in the face."

"That's how we met, and ever since we had each other's back." He wiped his face and his throat burned. He would not cry in front of these people. He would be stronger than that. "Kagome...was the first person besides my parents that I gave my love to. She was kind and confident and she made it okay to love, to laugh. Kagome made everything okay, always, and if there's something I'm going to miss most about her it's going to be that. Thank you all for coming."

He sat for the rest of service and was one of the first people to leave and follow the hearse. The plot they had was nice, next to Kagome's father. Another thing they had in common. Only a kid with a dead parent knew how to comfort a kid with a dead parent.

It was harder than he thought watching them lower her into the ground. He wanted to skip out on throwing dirt on her coffin. Instead he threw a rose, something that would die just as beautifully as it grew. Like Kagome.

Kikyou was the one who pulled him away from the headstone. She said they could come back later, when they had covered her and they could bring her more flowers. The bright blue skies at the start of the service had slowly faded to grey as the day wore on. If the heaven's were so sad about gaining an angel maybe they should give her back.

That night Inuyasha sat on the balcony as he had been accustomed to doing the last several months. Kikyou sat beside him, a blanket over her lap and a book in her hand. He watched as Kikyou tried to tough it out for him. She was tired, but she didn't want to leave him alone. That gnawing guilt was back. The sour feeling in his stomach telling him that he was an asshole, that he didn't deserve all her kindness and understanding.

He sent her to bed with the promise to meet her there soon. He shouldn't finish the bottle of Jack, but he knew he would. Kikyou knew too. Instead of chastising him over his excess drinking, she let him indulge. He was grateful. Half a pack of smokes and several drinks later, Inuyasha was all but stumbling to bed.

Per usual, Kikyou rolled over as soon as his back hit the mattress. As Inuyasha closed his eyes and ran his fingers through his fiancee's hair, he allowed his drunken mind to wonder. Inuyasha gently maneuvered his way through a snag as the silky straight strands in his hands turned wavy.

"We'll get through this. We'll get past this." He heard Kagome say.

"I...don't know." He was so unsure, of everything.

"We will, because I love you." His grip on her tightened.

"I love you too."

6 months later

Kikyou woke up to the feeling of nails digging in her skin. The arm that was outstretched to her fiancee, as she always found herself reaching for him, was encased in a vice like grip. In the dark it was hard to see, but she thought Inuyasha was on his back. His head lulled back and forth, his grip loosening and tightening as he murmured under his breath. She could hear his legs and feet gliding across the sheets erratically.

"No...please." Kikyou sat up and scooted close. She could see his eyes moving rapidly under their lids. He was dreaming. She rested her free hand against his chest and began to rub, trying to soothe him.

"Shh, Inuyasha it's okay. It's okay."

"Kag...Kagome, don't, don't leave." She winced as she though his grip might actually break her wrist. She readjusted herself, snuggling her body close to his. She threw a leg around his middle, trying to wrap as much of herself as she could around him.

"I'm not going anywhere." She repeated as she rubbed where she could reach. She felt her tears running from corner to corner. She hoped he wouldn't ask why his shirt was wet in the morning. She wanted to stop. To shut off these tears and pretend to be stronger than that, but she couldn't.

The nightmares had gotten better. 3 months ago she woke up to the sounds of him screaming. Crying for Kagome in his sleep as he reached out for someone who wasn't there. The therapy seemed to be helping, seemed to be making him better. She had wanted to be that person he could talk to, and in so many ways she ways, but there were things he needed to say that she couldn't hear.

Things she knew she didn't want to hear. Kikyou knew Inuyasha loved Kagome. It was practically a damn commandment for being in Inuyasha's life. Thou shall know and respect Kagome Higurashi. When they had first began dating it was made very clear who Kagome was and what role she played in his life. It was also made very clear that any girl who found themselves unable to handle that, could leave.

So she stayed. She loved Inuyasha and she wanted to love Kagome too. If only because she meant so much to him. Kagome was bubbly and light and lively. She was the person in the room with so much energy she could invigorate anyone within a 10 mile radius. Many stories told of Kagome and her adventures, always seeming to be the most random things happening at the most random time in order to curate this beautiful moment.

Kikyou remembers the first nights of many nights, where Kagome found herself at their door. A random moment leading to an addiction and sending this beautiful, lively angel straight to hell. It was hard, watching someone as lovely as Kagome loose her wings. Watching her become someone no one could recognize.

It was never meth or heroine. It was pills and drinking and coke. Too many parties. Too many boys. Too many random moments that lead her into a nightmare. And now she was gone. Leaving a gaping hole in all the hearts she left behind. Leaving guilt with the ones who tried to help, but couldn't save her.

If there was one thing Kikyou hated Kagome Higurashi for, it was for leaving Inuyasha and turning him into this. There were so many things they were supposed to do, so many beautiful moments for her and Inuyasha to share. They were supposed to get married...then Kagome died and the world stopped turning. Inuyasha's world stopped turning.

He meant it when they said they always had each other's backs. Inuyasha was the only one that stayed by Kagome's side. Too many bail outs from jail, and DUIs, and fights, and thefts had caused everyone else to distance themselves. Even her mother, but not Inuyasha. He answered every 3 am call. He paid every bond. He never gave her cash, but he gave her food and a place to stay. Kikyou wanted him to change the locks when Kagome stole her engagement ring, in the middle of the night. He simply said that's why he splurged on insurance.

He refused to do what so many others had done. Inuyasha was nothing if not stubborn and he promised he would never give up on her. Then it happened. They found her in her bed, wrapped all cozy like she just wanted to take a nap. She remembers Inuyasha that day. The first time she'd ever seen him cry. The sight made her feel like she just took a drop from a 200 foot coaster.

For months it was a lot of crying, so much crying. Hardly ever in front of her. On the balcony, in the bathroom, into his pillow when he thought she was sleep. Each tear broke her heart. Each distant look caused her pain. She'd never forgive Kagome for taking away that light in his eye. The rare one that slips out when he's at his most unguarded. Now all that were left were shadows.

Inuyasha may have been living with a ghost, but so was she.