#anyways i’m feeling brave. fuck it we maintag

[ctrl-alt-deleting-yr-face]

i adore thinking about reverie of rebirth and bedkari in general because god. they’re both fucked. both of these idiots are fucked

hikari never really recovered fully from romeo’s death. she managed to appear well established to others, but she was still violently unstable and grieving and unsure what to do without romeo. without the one person she knew. without her guiding light. he was torn away from them, and they want him back. and selfishly, she wants him back exactly the way he was. his body is still weak. it’s still branded with the tattoos that represented his accursed brain condition. his body and its physical state is exactly the way it was before he died. the only thing that’s different is the limiter she placed upon him with asuka’s help so he can stay awake without dying again. she wanted him exactly as she remembered him… not realizing that she would cause him harm by doing so.

romeo, in return, is spiteful and angry and remorseful that he’s here like this. he’s in pain mentally and physically but he’s too prideful to talk about it. he simply begins lashing out violently against the people he lives with— hikari especially. he’s meant to be dead, god damn it! he shouldn’t be here, body and mind slowly healing, witnessing the joy and love that’s shown to him by his sister and baiken and the goddamn yokai who he manipulated like a pavlov dog for his own game. it’s like he can feel the rot that should be there, the maggots behind his eyes. he feels like he’s controlling himself from behind a screen… and he isn’t even dreaming this time. he could grab hikari’s neck and choke her with his own two hands. curse her for bringing him back like this. but it was his fault, in a way. he made her admire him like this. he skewed her view and her emotions so hard, it’s no wonder she sees him like a prophet sees a god. but they’re still the one who did this… his head is foggy. he’s caught in this cognitive loophole that he can’t escape from. and all he can do is sleep, sit at that untuned piano that lies in the sunlight heavy room of this house, and scream his frustrations right back at hikari… who barely even flinches at it.