#anyways can u tell that every single time i read a batman fanfic about a child aged 12 or less my one eye stays twitching
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ginalinettiofficial · 5 days ago
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listen to me. listen to me please.
i know that canonically bruce wayne never had any of his tiny children in booster seats because comic book writers likely are not very well educated on the topic and, like honestly most people, are entirely unaware of the very real dangers that children under age 12 face in cars due to their spinal and skeletal development. i know this.
but i cannot help the part of my brain that IS educated about car seat safety and booster seat safety and best practices for children in vehicles
and i also cannot help but know that bruce “my back up plans have back up plans and research is my super power” wayne would absolutely have at least SOME idea of the most up to date car seat regulations okay
and so i cannot help but think that somewhere in some universe. there is a bruce wayne who has asked for booster fit checks for his 12 and under robins on car seat safety facebook groups or reddit pages
and now i am just imagining. the posts. because listen
there are car seat pages on facebook okay, groups full primarily of parents and caregivers who post pictures of their children’s car seats/boosters and/or their children IN said seats, for purposes of doing a “fit check” aka asking the professionals in the group (CPSTs, in case anyone cares) to double check that the seat is installed correctly and that they have buckled the child correctly and that everything fits properly
and the thing is that a good quarter of all posts in those groups are in fact of children aged 10-12 sitting their most upright and buckled in WITHOUT their booster, with a caption that goes something like “hey so my 10yo is begging to be done with their booster - can i get a fit check? they’re 55in, 62 pounds. we drive a 2007 camry if that matters.” and the comments are inevitably filled with people letting them know that nope, sorry, that kid does NOT pass the 5-step test, and probably will need a booster for a couple more years.
(the five step test, if you’re curious, is the five steps that a child has to physically pass in order to safely sit without a booster before age 13. there are four places to fit check - neck, lap, knees, and feet - and then the fifth step is whether they are mature enough to keep themselves in a safe position for the duration of a car ride - aka won’t slouch, mess with the seatbelt, etc. most 12 year olds do not 5 step and if their parents are educated about it, that means they’ve gotta be in a booster til they’re 13.)
((the comment section will also inevitably have at least one adult woman saying “this is wild, i’m 5’1 and i don’t pass this five step test myself! yall are too strict!” followed by the admins or a cpst kindly reminding them, “yes, but you have an adult skeleton. also you ARE at more risk in a car than the average man, cars are designed to keep male bodies safe and female and child bodies just have to make do.”))
all this to say that i can just. SO picture bruce wayne being in one of these groups, and every few years posting a pic of a different kid and saying “please help me convince my child he still needs his booster, as he won’t listen to me. age 11, 60in, 75lb, convinced that i’m making him use a booster seat solely to embarrass him 🙄”
and then the comments section which would be half people going “hahahah my 12yo is the exact same - but nope sorry bud, knees don’t meet the edge of the seat & that belt is definitely too high up on his neck!!” and “definitely doesn’t 5 step, better luck next time kiddo 😂” and the other half people going “BRUCE WAYNE??????????” or “BRUCE POSTED EVERYONE WAKE UP BRUCE POSTED AGAIN!!!!! hi bruce we missed you!!!!!”
i can’t draw well enough but please know that if i could i’d make a whole social media au that’s just bruce asking for booster fit checks for his various children
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