#anyway. this is about to become a funny story blog much like it became a beach read one

[jimlingss]

two years!! :D it’s been two years since my final curtain call and seven years since Jimlingss began! Seven years!!! Now that’s a crazy yet meaningful number!

Hello to everyone reading this message :D hopefully you remember me (it’s ok if you don’t) and for those who care, hopefully this is a treat! just a quick update on my life — I successfully completed my first year of law school and what a whirlwind it’s been. 

I’ve had so many ups and downs in the past year and I honestly feel like I’ve changed a lot. like evolved from pichu to pikachu. It was my first time moving away from home, away from my parents, and making so many friends. it’s been 20% bitter and 80% sweet. overall, I feel like I’ve learnt so much about myself and became a lot more stable in who I am.

school is hard but completely manageable. luckily, I don’t think my choice was wrong. there are days I quite enjoy what I’m learning. I got 2 years left in the game. soon (hopefully) I’ll be making the big bucks $$$ and I’ll be able to fund my sugar baby dreams (except I’ll also be my own sugar mommy). Although my dating life is as stale as always with 0 movement, I’ve become close with a handful of folks that I hold dearly to my heart. guess I’m in my friendship arc hahahaha

funny enough, I actually came back to this blog out of my own volition 2 weeks ago and re-read some of my stories. I feel so nostalgic. some of my stories really slap ngl. anyway, I really miss creative writing so much. Fortunately, there’s a few extracurriculars at school that allow me to write creatively so it’s somewhat of an outlet for me. it’s not fully satisfying but it’s something!!

I regularly come back to tumblr to check messages and do plagiarism checks lol. Speaking of which, I’ll take this time to answer some messages in my inbox.

unfortunately, i don’t have any socials that anyone can follow me on. my socials are pretty private and only the people who i’m close to, I follow and vice versa. but no worries because I will always come back to this blog to do a yearly update so you’ll hear from me! I will satiate your curiosity if you’re every curious about what I’m up to!!

for anyone who ever messages me compliments to my stories and/or missing my presence, no worries, I read them all :) your messages and feedback is never lost! it’s very sweet and always warms my heart.

if you can’t reach my masterlist, it’s here lol

I’ve kind of fallen off my fic reading game so if you ask me if I know a specific fic, I won’t be much of help unfortunately ://

if my fics ever help you through hard times, then I’m super glad!!! life can undoubtably be downright terrible. life can really really suck (understatement). but I think it’s comforting to know that everyone at some point thinks the same. it’s a universal sentiment - and in that, you’re not alone.

anyway, that’s it for now! you’ll hear from me again!

I’ll be back! And I hope you will too! :>

[thedragonagebigbang]

Bang Creator Interview: Tumblr: @twist-shout-and-shells | AO3: Aint_No_Holy_Ghost

The Collaboration period has begun! In these quiet months before works are due, we want to foster a sense of excitement, camaraderie, and celebration among our participants. To that end, all participants were given the option of a formal interview by our mod, Dema, or an informal “ask-game” survey. We hope you enjoy getting to know our phenomenal creators as much as we have!

This is how local political unrest can help your love life!

Izzy and Dema talk writing (surprise!), trying and failing to catch a train, and Those Greek Guys

Dema: Starting current events (at the time of the interview): It's pitch writing time! How's it going?

Izzy: I've reached the part where the fun and games end and the heavier plot begins, so I'm moving more slowly. I totally lost control of the direction my story was going after chapter 3. But it's been a great time writing this story!

Dema: It is funny how our own stories can get away from us. I think I have my vibes pinned down and I almost always deviate. Does that tend to be your experience or are you usually a make-a-plan, stick-to-the-plan-type of writer?

Izzy: I try to be a no-plan writer. That's usually how my stories start: I get an idea and start in it with no real direction. But eventually I'm forced to develop some plan for where I'm going, and I try to stick to it. But I think the nature of stories is that sometimes they just write themselves and I'm simply their vessel.

Dema: I'm trying to remember which writer described it as trying to catch a train...

Izzy: That sounds familiar... But I can't remember either.

Dema: Wow, it's gunna drive me crazy. I'll put it in later… it was basically, you're on foot, and inspiration is like a train, and you're just grabbing onto whatever you can grab. Except I'm pretty sure a nobel prize-winning writer said it so it sounded much better.

[Narrator: Dema never did find the original source, and it really will drive her crazy. If you know it, tag her!]

When you say you eventually need to develop a plan, at what point do you realize you need to do that?

Izzy: Either when I run out of inspiration or when I have a clear idea of where I want to get, but no idea of how to get there. With my story for the DABB it was the former: after writing three chapters non-stop I hit a brick wall of "alright, and where am I going with this?"

Dema: I was going to ask about the DABB next! Did you have your preliminary idea before you decided to join in?

Izzy: Yes. It was an idea that had been kicking around in my head for a long while, but that I wasn't sure I should actually write because it's a) kind of a cliche and b) not a very popular pairing, but eventually I decided to just get it out there anyway. It started with a very particular line of dialogue and grew from there.

Dema: Oh, we love a rarepair in this house…And of course, I know what it is, and am excited.

Izzy: Lol! It was strange for me actually, becoming a rare pair writer. The first big bang I participated in was for Supernatural, a pairing with 100k fics on their tag. Now I'm writing for a pair with 100 fics, 4 of which are mine.

Dema: Incredible. You are holding down this fort. Also I love this little teaser. When did you start writing for DA?

Izzy: October 2022 (We're in 2024 already, jesus Christ)

Dema: Yes, unfortunately it is a daily shock for me as well. But I love how many people come into the fandom and create new fanworks even so long after the last game came out. What drew you in? Were you already hanging around the DA fandom before 2022?

Izzy: I started playing...at the end of 2021, I think. My brother introduced me to the franchise and my autistic little brain became obsessed with it. I was going to name my favorite game and protagonist, but considering they're the center of the fic, that'd be a spoiler. Anyway, I started following some DA blogs on Tumblr, and eventually thoughts of that game had consumed my every waking thought to the point I wrote two academic essays about it in my first year of uni. I wrote a significant portion of those 4 fics in the bus on the way to said uni. What drew me in most were the themes, really.

Dema: Any in particular?

Izzy: Found family and the tragic undertones of it all, mostly. I really like the way DA2 works as a tragedy in between two epics. The mage x templar conflict is also quite interesting. The tragedy x epic was totally the subject of one of those essays, btw. My professors suffer.

Dema: So I assume DA2 is your favorite of the franchise? Have you played all of them?

Izzy: Yes, it is! I've played all of them a couple of times, and DA2...several times. I don't know how many. 

Dema: I'm so curious if you played them in order or started with DA2. The "best order" to experience the DA universe is an interesting debate.

Izzy: No, I played them in order. Personally, I think it'd be strange to play them out of order, at least for the first time, because of the way the stories tie into each other. What I did do was play DA2 twice before I played Inquisition because on my first gameplay I didn't really check the writing desk (there wasn't anything like that in DAO and I was still new to games more complex than The Sims) and I missed Fenris entirely. Detail: he's one of my fave companions now

Dema: I'm pretty sure I missed Sera on my first DA:I playthrough. It's wild how much it impacts the story, if you miss a companion!

Izzy: Yes! I mean, it's a whole arc and a lot of banter you just don't get. Fenris has so much good banter!! I truly can't believe I missed him.

Dema: When it comes to the DA fandom, would you consider yourself a gamer first and a writer or reader second, or something else?

Izzy: That's a really difficult question. I'm not exactly a big gamer. Like, I'm not a completionist and I mostly play on casual because my real focus is the story being told. So I guess what I truly am is a "reader of the game" lol. Though I have been getting more into combat strategizing and stuff like that for DA2, because you can only play something on casual so many times before it loses the appeal. If you'll allow me an anecdote, to paint a picture of the kind of "gamer" I am: one time I was playing DAI in my brother's room (his computer), and he walks in, sees me with a vein popping on my forehead, stupidly focused, staring unflinchingly at the screen, and asks "what the f* are you doing?" I was in the undercroft tinting armors. 

And then, after that, I'm a writer.

Dema: This story is very relatable, lol. You've touched on the narrative structure of the franchise a bit and I'd love to hear more about that epic to tragedy to epic format, and why that resonated. Since you wrote a whole paper on it, just distill it into like four sentences, that shouldn't be hard right??? (I'm sorry)

Izzy: Oh, god. Ok. I'll try not to get too carried away :V

Dema: Please feel free. Here is a box to stand on, and a megaphone.

Izzy:  So. Uh. The Greeks, right? Those guys. Aristotle, more specifically. The Poetics and all that. I think DAO and DAI follow the formula of classic epics: you have this larger than life hero going on a very important quest to save the world. Notice that those games are longer than DA2, kind of like an odyssey, if you will. There are many quests, many steps to the journey before the hero can rest. It's glorious and grand, regardless of whether the hero survives or not. Now DA2 follows the formula of tragedies even closer than the other games follow the epic. And I mean step by step aristotelian formula. You have Hawke, who rises into fame and fortune. The rising movement is very important, because you later have the downfall. He gets fame and riches, but everything comes with a cost, usually the lives of his family. So in DA2 you have this constant rise and fall movement, leading up to the end where (if you defend the mages, at least) Hawke is forced to leave behind everything they spend 7+ years building. They lose everything. In the essay I compared it to Oedipus: he becomes king and etc, there's this looming prophecy (remember Flemmeth when you do the amulet ritual), and in the end everything falls apart. That's as summarized as I can get lol. And Hawke starts out as a nobody! And the game is actually divided in acts!!!

Dema: I read a LOT of classics/Homer in undergrad and I love this. Ten out of Ten. Thank you! I could honestly listen to you talk about that epic/tragedy structure for another hour but alas, we are out of time. To close the interview, and just for fun: Can you come up with a buzzfeed-style, misleading, click-bait title for your fic? Without giving anything major away that would identify you lol

Izzy: Ok, so, this is as vague as I managed: This is how local political unrest can help your love life (Also, I just realized I went out to get wifi and did the whole interview wearing a DA2 sweater. It was a complete accident, I swear)

Dema: AMAZING. Please show me the sweater!!

Izzy: The culprit:

Dema: I love it. Thank you for chatting with me, Izzy!

[archiveikemen]

Liam Evans Main Story: Chapter 4 — Premium

I do not own any of the Ikemen Series content being uploaded on this blog, everything belongs to CYBIRD. Please support them by downloading and playing their games.

read this before interacting with my posts

(Like this…?)

While my eyes were closed, something was placed in my hands and a fresh smell filled my nose.

— You can open your eyes now, Kate.

When I opened my eyes, I saw a bouquet of fresh pink modern roses in my arms.

The moment I became aware of it, the scent of flowers smelled stronger and sweeter.

Kate: This is…

Liam: This is for you. Thanks for sparing me your time tonight, Kate.

Kate: You didn't have to. I should be the one giving you a gift for that performance…

Liam: These flowers are to thank you for watching me. So…

Liam: If you don't accept them, they won't have an owner.

(He has a point. In that case…)

Kate: Thank you so much, Liam. I’ll be sure to cherish them well, so that they’ll keep blooming for a long time.

Kate: If I display them by my room’s window, they’ll definitely bring a smile to my face tomorrow morning.

Liam: If flowers can make you smile every morning, then I’ll give you however many flowers you want!

Liam: — Anyway, can I have your feedback? Take it as if I’m asking you to praise me.

There wasn't a hint of Mercutio’s character as shrugged his shoulders.

Kate: It was magical and so captivating. It was as if the character was brought to life and standing before me.

Kate: Your performance moved my heart, and… I was reminded of my dream that I’ve been hiding deep in my heart.

Liam: … A dream?

(Ah…)

Kate: Um, it’s nothing great…

Liam: Why? Tell me about it. I want to know everything about you.

His tone was soft, but there was a sincere look in his rose coloured eyes.

Kate: I want to help others to not be afraid of what tomorrow will bring them,... by writing a story.

It was the first time I told anyone about that dream.

Liam didn't laugh when I told him what my dream was, he only nodded with a tender expression on his face.

Liam: “Help others to not be afraid of tomorrow”, hm. I like it. … Yup, that sounds good.

Liam: I’m sure working as a fairytale writer will be a useful experience to help you fulfil that dream.

Liam: … Hey, Kate.

Liam, who was standing on stage, crouched down to look me in the eyes.

(...?)

Liam: What do you think about observing only me for the next one month and writing about me in your report?

Kate: Write about you…?

Liam: That's right. Not about Crown, but about me as a person. It's because the finest stories are the ones with the best main character.

Liam: I’m confident that I can satisfy and charm you. I’ll shine even brighter just for you.

Liam: If you do that, one month will fly past before you know it, and you can return to your original life.

Liam: And as long as you're by my side, I can protect you. Isn't that the best idea?

(That’s a very attractive offer, and it sounds way too good for me.)

(But—)

Kate: But wouldn't you gain nothing from that?

Liam: Eh? I do. I get to be the closest person to you, a step or two ahead from the other guys in Crown.

Liam: Ahaha just imagining it already sounds great!

Kate: …!

I couldn't help but smile at his straightforward response.

(... Oh, I see.)

(I want to be like Liam. Sparkling and shining brightly, and touching people’s hearts.)

I didn’t think that would ever happen, though.

(Someday I’ll be just like Liam — and then I’ll become someone who can give to others.)

Kate: Well then, thank you, Liam.

Liam: No problem.

(Oh!)

Kate: I’ll definitely pay you back for the ticket. I want to pay for the nice things I receive.

Liam: …

Liam: Pfft ahahaha! You’re so funny, Kate.

Kate: Huh? I’m being serious—

Liam chuckled and held his hand out to me.

Liam: Want to come onto the stage? Come on, take my hand.

Upon being urged by him, I took his hand and he held me by my waist as he pulled me up onto the stage.

When I stood on the stage, I was blinded by the spotlight shining directly onto me.

Kate: I can’t believe you always have to stand under such a bright light… you're amazing.

Liam: I’m not amazing yet. I’ll work even harder to charm you. Perhaps I can play the role of Romeo next time.

Liam got down on one knee and held my hand in a practised gesture…

Liam: “I’m no sailor, but even if you were on the furthest shore… I’d risk going out to sea, just for a treasure like you” // Original script: “I am no pilot. Yet, wert thou as far as that vast shore washed with the farthest sea, I would adventure for such merchandise.”

He kissed the back of my hand with his smiling, rosy lips.

The feeling of Liam’s moist lips on my skin was so bewitching, and it made me suddenly very aware that he was a man.

(... This feels like I’ve been gently nibbled by a cat precious to me.)

Liam: Your face is bright red, Kate. Cute~

Kate: I-It’s not…

Liam: Oh, really? Then let’s leave it at that. For now…

Liam’s innocent smile was so radiant as he basked in the spotlight.

(... I no longer fear facing my tomorrows. Liam has made me smile so many times now.)

Liam: Kate, wait for me at the entrance. I’ll be right with you after I change my clothes.

Liam parted ways with Kate and went to the wings of the stage.

At that very moment — it started raining in his heart.

ℹ️ this is a metaphor, referring to a sorrowful feeling.

Liam: … Ugh.

No matter how hard he tried to brush it off, the rain never stopped. Slowly, the voice of “someone” echoed in his head.

[Liam's POV]...

… Hey, Liam. Why are you trying so hard to get on friendly terms with Kate?

(... I just want to be useful to Kate.)

You’re doing this for Kate? Haha, you fool. You’re only being nice to her for your own sake, aren’t you?

(... Ggh.)

You just don’t want to be hated, you don't want to be hated, don't want to be hated, that's all it is!

Liam: … I know that. That's why… I have to keep at it.

— In hopes that I won't make another grave mistake and destroy everything with my own hands.

[phxntomhives]

Welcome to my sideblog

That has most likely become my main one. But idk how to change main and second one. So yeah. So if you see @phxntomhives-98 it's still me. I just don't know why sometimes I can't switch accounts and sometimes I can.

I will try to keep this blog mostly related to Kuroshitsuji and twst but who knows what I will like next. From memes (mostly repost because I am not that funny) to theories you can find anything here.

I am not spoiler free BUT I try my best to protect the new fans and hide things under the cut. Unfortunately, I am human, so you may run into spoilers, I am truly sorry.

I am 25, she/her pronouns, INTP. I would love to get to know more people in the fandoms I am in, but eeeh my social skills are lacking. So feel free to hit my dms, I don't bite I promise. I am trying to make more moots/mutuals pls

Here most thing you can find me posting about/comments etc (under the cut because it became long ops)

Kuroshitsuji/Black Butler

Sebaciel shippers do not interact. I will just block and move on. If you see me liking one post tagged like that it's because I am stupid and I don't always read the tags, pls let me know and I will fix the problem.

Now that the important part is over: I AM SO EXCITED FOR THE NEW SEASON AAH. The Weston College arc is my favourite so I am very happy and it feels so nice to see my children here :3

I am up to date with the manga as well, so if you need to cry with someone, I am here. Sobbing.

My fave is Ciel, and Lizzie slander shall not be tolerated (half joking, you are free to dislike her but I am ready to fight at any time to defend her).

A couple of things you may want to check? If you are bored???

New manga chapter comments under: #Phxntomhives Kuro manga yapping

Analysis/theories

"The Parade of Battlers" song analysis

Finny grew up (chapter 211 spoilers)

Short analysis of the GFantasy May cover

The unlucky fate of the P4

Silly theory of the cricket's ending dance

Edgar sure is very much unlucky when it comes to life decision...

About Lizzie's anger (reblog theory)

Chapter 209 crack theory (to welcome denial)

Short analysis of Bluewer talking to Ciel during the Midnight party (from a reblog)

Short analysis of Undertaker's GFantasy cover

Headcanons

P4 headcanons

My kuro AU, kuro AU pt 2

Gregory scream headcanons (kind of angst)

Pandora Hearts

Very new to the fandom and I understood like half of it. Anyway it's beautiful and you all should read it! Come cry with me!

Here some fresh thoughts after I read the last chapter

Headcanon to hurt my soul

Vanitas no carte/The case study of Vanitas

Up to date with both anime and manga! And not so patiently waiting for each update. I miss them, I hope for a new chapter soon.

Twisted Wonderland (JP SERVER)

Up to date with main story and eons behind with the events ops. No I do not know japanese, tho I am trying to learn, but I started the game when that was the only version avaiable and I will not start again on eng server sorry. (Technically I have started but I had no more space on my phone and one had to go)

If you are curious about what I think about the story check #phxntomhives twst yapping (because I plan to type a lot and refuse to keep updating this list it's supposed to be pretty after all)

Theories

Events are canon. Part 2: wish upon a star.

Silver gets a title copium.

Tokyo Aliens

READ IT LEGALLY. FOR FREE. HERE I TELL YOU HOW.

WHY IS THERE NO FANDOM IT'S SUCH A NICE STORY. PLEASE GIVE IT A CHANCE.

I AM LIVING OF HALF A POST AND FANMADE TRANSLATION. HELP.

Parallels between Tokyo Aliens and Negai no Astro

Spoiler/Analysis from scans: chapter 41, chapter 42, chapter 43, chapter 44, chapter 45, chapter 46, chapter 47, chapter 48, chapter 49, chapter 50 (After I added these I basically took over the tags plsssss)

Dr stone

It's appearing more on my feed so I had the feeling I had to add this lol. I love it dearly, I finished the manga and I need to catch up with the anime. I am extremely worried about the rumored (?) new volume that is coming ngl

Negai no Astro

Damn, I am hooked.

Parallels between Tokyo Aliens and Negai no Astro

Aaand honestly many more, feel free to ask! If it helps, here is my not updated because it takes forever MyAnimeList! But I probably missed many of them so really, just come and ask.

I may drop some suggestions to read too sometimes, here they are

Suggestions for you <3

Why you should read Merry Marbling

If you like Negai no Astro or Tokyo Aliens PLEASE CHECK THE OTHER SERIE MENTIONED.

[gyllenhaalstories]

Hi there! Love your blog 💕 How and when did you get into Jake? What was your first film with him? The film that made you become a fan? Thanks!☺️

hiiiii! thank you, i'm happy to know you enjoy it! oh my god, you're giving me another opportunity to ramble? you're too generous! 🥰❤️ short answer: i started mostly around 2019 and the movie that did it for me is demolition. long answer? this novel i wrote below!

my first jake movie had to be prince of persia although i have no memory of watching it as a kid. i just know i did because my dad played the video game and this sounds like a movie he'd watch too. when prisoners came out on dvd in 2013, i asked my parents to rent the movie because i liked hugh jackman as wolverine. if wolverine is funny, that means prisoners will be funny too, right? WRONG. i was so wrong. i spent almost the entire movie hidden under a blanket, i remember the stares my parents gave me. i was so embarrassed. but i also remember that one good looking man on the screen, wink wink (or well, blink blink) the only jake movies i watched after that were love & other drugs and brokeback mountain. both made me cry, so i loved them. i would stay up late (back in the day when i thought midnight was late) and watch them on television. other than that, my life used to be a sad dark lonely gyllenvoid.

ah, the glorious day when i saw the poster for spider-man far from home. i took a photo, i made sure to crop the guy with the cape, i didn't care for him. pff. i wanted spider-man! i kept telling myself that there was this one dude in the trailer that reminded me of someone, but i couldn't replace him. until i connected the dots!!! that hello quentin / yeah hi honey scene had me shaking in my seat. i came home, i tried googling his name in five different spellings until i got it right. i asked a friend at the time if she knew about jake because i had this new crush on him and she was like "this crush isn't new, you just forgot he existed" (i was juggling with other famous hot men who are double my age, i was busy). so apparently i was into him and i didn't even know about it! anyway! i started looking through jake's tag for gifs and photos, then for fics, then i thought it'd be nice to make a blog to appreciate and reblog the fics (this is when i became a fan of nat and maria from afar! and now they're my friends and i love them so much). a few months after that, i was like sure why not maybe i can write my own stories too. i made this blog at the end of 2019 and here i am, five years later!!! my obsession for jake is stronger than ever.

i stuck to mysterio and jake fics for a while, his filmography was intimidating and it lacked in barbie movies so i was not THAT motivated to get through it at first. i kept an eye on movies that played on television for something he could be in and i found one: enemy. i know jake recently suggested enemy as one of the first movies of his to start with but i could not disagree more. the spiders? yeah no. enemy was my enemy. i saw that it played on a different channel, in english this time, so i gave it a shot. i was intrigued... i went to his wikipedia page and picked one of the shortest movies in his register: demolition. i've said it before and i'll say it again, i loved demolition so much that i watched it twice in the same evening. demolition is the movie that got me hooked. i couldn't understand how underrated it used to be, people barely brought it up! it almost made me forget the spider debacle of enemy, i just wanted to see more of jake.

i'm almost through with his entire filmography now! it's taken me a long time, but i'm proud of myself for watching so many movies that are out of my usual taste. it made me discover so many sides of jake's talent and so many characters that live rent free in my mind. if i could go back in time, i would still choose demolition as the great leap into the jake gyllenhaal multiverse. you didn't ask for all this rambling but shhhh details. i'm curious to know your answer to this question too!!! thank you again, anon! 💖💖💖

[irrealismora]

An Introduction

Hi. Hello. And welcome. This used to be a writeblr but I have this awful tendency to dislike talking about my WIP, and so it's become more of a dumping ground of things that I think are funny or interesting or "important." While I don't mind it being that, I have always struggled with transmuting my thoughts into coherent sentences and with just communicating with other people in general and this blog is just lying here collecting dust so I thought, "Well, why the fuck not."

So, hi. And hello. And welcome.

This blog is gonna be just that: a blog. It'll have things that I'm interested in or things I'm trying to figure out. It'll have reblogs of things I think are funny or informative or important. It may or may not be properly tagged (the world may never know). I'm thinking of this blog as a wet lump of clay; I'm gonna try and give form to something I'm not even sure exists yet.

Anyways.

About Me:

Name: irrealis (I've gone by other names, like Blue and Twelve, but I think I like "irrealis" most out of all of them.)

Pronouns: Huge fan of when people use whatever pronouns they think fit me best. (If clear direction is needed, "they/them" is acceptable.)

Location: America. (Too paranoid to say much else than that.)

Age: Mid-Twenties (See previous aside)

Interests: - Writing. I have a ten year old WIP that occupies nearly every waking moment of my life. It's titled "The Book of Daemon" (tbod) and I suck at summaries but long story short, it's about life, family, love, and self discovery in the context of a group of immortal beings called the Xenyx. "The Book of Daemon" specifically follows the return of Daemon to what is left of the Main House of the 13 Xenyx Clans, his relationship with his brother and clan, and his reckoning with the very Evil that resulted in his disappearance and the deaths of the elders in their clan. - Conlanging. (If that wasn't super obvious from my name or (new) blog name.) I got into conlanging because I wanted to have a language for the Xenyx in tbod that wasn't just "English, but with different words" and it became something that I'm really interested in. I'm still really new to it, so be prepared to see the "post equivalent" of me repeatedly slamming my head into a desk. (I find it difficult to self-teach conlanging but I'm doing mah best!) - Storytelling. I like stories. Not much else to that. How are stories written? How was this particular story written, and how can I learn from it or how can it be improved? I might talk about this to some length but, again, I'm learning how to put my thoughts into words so that's something that's gonna take some time.

That's all I got for now. (Though I may add some more stuff later if I feel the need to.) It's definitely gonna be a wonky ride, but if you plan on sticking around, you are much appreciated. <3

(Also, I'm down for ask games and the like, so let me know! :D)

[lumenflowered]

🎙️ What is your opinion on the relationships Maria has?

OOC: Okay so I was NOT planning to have her unintentionally seduce Ethan's mom. But then I realized it would be really funny. It was still just going to be a one-off thing, aaaand then she became an actual character and I started scrambling to find this woman a name and a personality besides "mother."

(I think I did alright, honestly. I do have plans to briefly give Reina the blog sometime in the near future, so y'all will get to ask her things directly if you want! She has Lore.)

Anyway, I think it's ended up being pretty sweet. Which is wild considering that I'm writing a soulsborne boss here.

I've not been doing as much with Ethan himself as I'd like, he got a little overshadowed because the boy decided he didn't care about gyms or battling all that much after all. Oops. On the plus side, I've got the entirely of Kanto and only a few events planned out, so he can totally show up there at some point.

I did, however, have something in mind with Silver from close to the beginning. My friend Kayuri, who runs @steeltraptrainer, thought it would be really funny if he saw this very dangerous woman who just fell out of a death world and into the world of pokemon and, instead of (just) immediately declaring himself her rival, went "THAT'S someone who can actually be strong." He is very eleven and peak little shit and very fun to write.

(I only started planning the from the ashes arc after I'd settled on Maria becoming Ho-oh's chosen, because I realized—hey, I could kill someone and bring them back! And Silver ended up caught in the crossfire. It's fine he only died a little.)

Speaking of Ho-oh or Solaire as they've started calling themself (yes that was entirely intentional on my part, I like Bloodborne better than Dark Souls but the original Solaire is a treasure) I've been having a lot of fun playing around with the whole Chosen concept that Rotomblr came up with. They really looked at Maria and went. Oh hey. That one was dead and now isn't, she's got something approaching a code of morals, I want that one.

...I should do more with them. I do, however, have something planned in the next couple of days involving them already. Nothing too massive, just a fun little something wrapping up some loose ends from the Tohjo Falls incident.

Also, while he is unlikely to appear on the blog much, I'm very excited to inflict Maria on Lance in a more professional capacity than "that one time in Mahogany Town beating up Team Rocket." He is not prepared for Lady Maria of the Astral Clocktower. He is really not prepared for her to end up as his boss.

I really would be here all night if I got into Maria's relationships with other blogs, so let's just say that this would not be anywhere near as fun a story to tell if I was doing it alone, and Maria would herself not be in anywhere near as good of shape if it wasn't for the support (and occasional terrible nightmares) from everyone else on Rotomblr.

So consider this a thank you for being here! <3

[brawlqueen]

random friend love letter to lynnie .

( aka thank you for putting up with my mizuki propoganda)

okay so i realized i have sooo many typos in that post that you were so unbelievably kind about @nulltune​ ! mizuki somehow became my favorite female character and someone i personally relate with in a very personal way. a lot like my main muse really! just the ultimate girlboss queen of the brawl beyond superhuman prettiest girl on the planet (besides hakuno ofc). it means so much to me that you read that and trauma while horrible and painful, is so key to mizuki’s character? so i never not stress how crucial it’s made her, and i know how niche the aistf games are, personally the first / OG game by far is my favorite, the writing is chef’s kiss --- nirvana was so fun to play. 

like you i’m full canon divergent and if you ever get into these games i strongly recommend it because while the OG has a lot of gore, the second does not, and while i don’t consider it a ‘true sequel’ but more an alternate timeline? it’s still worth seeing a grown up mizuki, although trust me, i have many grievances, and many praises for the quality of life updates! really i’m just embarrassingly obsessed with kaname and mizuki date and their artificial eyeball shrimp named aiba (did you know mizuki and aiba are voiced by the eng vas of paimon and venti? yeah wild. also while i’m horrible at genshin sometime i’d love to add you! i’m becoming thanks to my best friend ... dramatic hand wave.... smarter. my main dps is actually jean and my favorite charas are yae miko who i got all her things (i legit screamed) and kaeya (please make him a five star and happy) )

you’re always so supportive of my metas and posts, and while i do believe i owe you an ask from hakuno, totally lost the meme hope you don’t mind queen, it means the world to me that you love mizuki and haven’t even touched ai the somnium files / nirvana initiative which makes me think i’m doing an okay job with my favorite female character. if you can handle dirty humor, absurdity, but the BEST found family tropes and things and the surreal along with core elements that make the murder / noir detective / horror genre so great? you would love them. they play much like a visual novel. 

in that same vein i really admire hakuno’s lore and effort you put into her. also your drawings? are insane. like how do you draw when i could only do a blurry stick figure?! another of your talents. and your psd is beautiful and everything about your blog screams love and care for YOUR FAVE GIRL.  and i cannot wait since i’m sure you’re drowning in drafts,  i’m in love with hakuno and i know nothing about her origins save i want to do all the writing with her when you are less drowning in drafts. you do know you can take your time right? i just don’t want you to feel stressed because life outside of tumblr is important and we all have valid reasons that we’re not engaging or quiet, i know i do! but really i had to write a note i hope you don’t mind. 

basically thanking you for being so patient with me, know that you can write with me anytime and i’ve love these girls to have some kind of relationship that’s wholesome and sweet. we all know mizuki needs friends, it’s not exactly easy being a go.ku level superwoman, and it meant so much to me reading those comments! i won’t shy away from the brutality of mizuki’s life, and the negative and positive aspects of her. 

thank you for always being a ray of sunshine on our dashes and being so sincere and heartfelt in all you do, be it funny content or serious, it makes me genuinely happy to see a friend loved and appreciated. anyway this made my night earlier so.... thank you so much lynnie-lynn! you’re a friend that i don’t need a week to talk to, it could be five months and we’d fall in rhythm. i hope you’ll stay with me as i mizuki froth at the mouth, let’s over time slowly, at our own pace if you want, make the mizuki and hakuno duo or at least scream love to each other from giant story buildings as friends! your  friend, lily.

[lifekomorebi]

‘You don’t look depressed, you always look so happy - you are always out!’ Ugh. I live each month half in darkness and the other half in the light. But who wants to see the darkness, I certainly don’t want to look back at those memories.

Social media is just a facade for me, the highlights of the two weeks in the month where I am actually normal, happy, able to leave the house, function, look after myself and interact with people. I plan and cram in as much as possible into the two weeks I am functioning. I work excessive hours, I live harder and faster because I am so happy that I am not just existing.

The other half is barely documented, and I couldn’t even if I wanted to. It is notes that I have left on my phone, post it notes dotted around the house and voice notes to myself. None of which I would share, they are so bleak, but serve to remind me that the darkness exists and I have to fight to get help when I am back into the light.

#PMDD is a life of two halves - with the onset of perimenopause the combination has been turned up to 11 and each month it ramps up. Anyway let’s rewind a bit…

Frustratingly, I lost the ability to write last year. Bored of my my same old rhetoric I did not think my ramblings were useful, eloquent or even funny. Writing about my own mental health failures time after time only served as printed evidence of my lack of progress - another year of my brain and body not working together. In fact my takeaway was that maybe I didn’t want to get better, maybe I wanted to reside in my ‘den of slack’ population one - with no escape.

Now of course, I know this is not true but it became a massive block to any creativity and blog got virtually dusty. It felt hollow, a self absorbed vanity project. December 2023 was my last blog post, so why do I start again now. Simply put this story is important, and if it resonated with one person, if it raises awareness and gets anyone to listen and take action it is worth it. So many women are lost to this condition, silently wondering if they are going mad, wrongly diagnosed and lost in an over capacity health system. So I am back.

Clinically speaking my condition has deteriorated, month and my cycle has moved from 28 days to 20 days. I track my mood and energy levels within the Moody app - at least I know it is coming. But was it becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy, I don’t know, let’s put a pin in that until next time.

Since January I have seen 15 different medical professionals, telling my story again and again and never feeling like I was heard. On one occasion I was told by a very confident GP - PMDD was just a trend and what I suffered from was Bipolar disorder, great that old chestnut. I was back to 20 years ago. That was the last straw, I know my body, it was not that!

I was finally referred to a psychiatrist last month who was exceptional, he looked at my paper charts, my moody app - he confirmed it was #PMDD and said he was working with so many women to help control the symptoms. I am now trying a new mood stabilising drug which will take a while to take hold. But he will be my sole constant for my mental health and that feels comforting, maybe I won’t have to keep telling my story. Maybe I can write a new chapter, I hope so…

[ovenmade]

9, 11, & 14!

YET ANOTHER MULTIMUSE QUESTIONNAIRE.  ACCEPTING!

9. For canon characters, tell what drew you to use a character to make them a muse? Any of your choice.

I'll just talk a little about all of them! Strawberry Crepe was an easy choice for me. The moment I have a mess of lengthy, disorganized notes on my phone and a handful of Google docs filled with ideas and headcanons about a character, it's almost certain I'll be making a blog for them lol! Perhaps there is some familiarity with them and even Silverbell, as Strawberry Crepe has some shades of Sora Shiun'in while Silverbell has hints of III / Michael Arclight, but they're still very much different characters and certainly can't be treated as the same. Though now that we're talking about Silverbell, I honestly ended up picking him up pretty quickly because he just instantly appealed to me haha. I loved nearly everything about Secrets of the Silver Kingdom update, especially the culture and mythos of the faeries ( and of course the beasts ), and I will absolutely be expanding it with my own lore and such! I hope we get to revisit the faeries at some point. Red Velvet and Stardust both kinda fall in the same category — I love both of them as characters and enjoy their stories, but I've never quite written muses like either of them before. I've always wanted to broaden my horizons and try new types of characters, and Cookie Run gives me that chance in a way that other fandoms I'm in don't seem to. I'm not exactly confident in my portrayals of them yet, which is why Red Velvet and Stardust are currently labeled tertiary, but I actually do have a lot of thoughts and feelings about both of them! Eternal Sugar and Peach Blossom was purely because of aesthetic. Now that we actually have the story of Peach Blossom, which did not satisfy me simply for my bias of wanting him to be more important / involved ( especially considering his character inspiration ), it's more because of the potential I see in him. I feel a lot more can be done with Peach Blossom, and I very much plan on developing him further and having fun while I'm at it! As for Eternal Sugar, I'm very much looking forward to their debut episode ( whenever it comes ) and learning about how they became corrupted. I have a feeling all the beasts have a similar setup to Mystic Flour ( in that they didn't become 'evil' for the sake of being evil — there was a cause, a reason, an epiphany of some sort. ) My portrayal will probably stray away from canon to some degree because I already have a few personal headcanons for them, but to be honest, all my portrayals here are headcanon-based on some level or another. Some more than others, but my point still stands!

11. Have you ever drew any of your muses, if so can you show a drawing?

As far as my Cookie Run muses go? I haven't yet and that's a crime! My art is still amateurish and I haven't drawn consistently enough to have improved very much, but I've been trying to revisit the basics and go forward from there more recently, jotting down ideas for when I feel my skills are a bit better. That said, there isn't really anything worthy to show off really unless you want to see a bunch of studies lmao, but here's some of my old art anyways! Again, far from professional, but as Bob Ross says: "Talent is a pursued interest. Anything that you're willing to practice, you can do."

14. Which of your muses is the easiest to get along with? Which one is the hardest?

Out of the current roster, Peach Blossom is probably the easiest and Strawberry Crepe the hardest! Almost anyone could get along with Peach Blossom honestly. It's actually a little funny that he was in Dark Cacao's story, the cookie with the least trust for strangers ( though his distrust is understandable, especially with what he went through in Beast-Yeast. ) Strawberry Crepe being the hardest to bond with is also ironic, given that they are actually lonely and do desire the company of others ( despite acting like they don't. )

[feuqueerfire]

The Sign Live Blogging

I was supposed to watch Only Friends after Pit Babe but then took over a week off of watching new shows because I had to write a Pete/Kenta fic and now instead of Only Friends, I'm watching The Sign.

I know incredibly little about this show except it involves Billy and a guy I don't know, there's monsters? sci-fi/fantasy elements? cops? I watched like a few tiktoks/gifsets from eps 1 and 2 but those didn't give away much. Also, there was angsty stuff going on in this show during that week when Pit Babe ep 10? aired and [redacted] [redacted] and Last Twilight was getting a lot of flack for ep 12 but I can't remember if it was because somebody died or not

Anyway, here we go, hope to love it, as always.

Ep 1 (Feb 20)

1-1

Ah, I for a split second wondered if that person was gonna betray them... but was like nah, this is just the beginning and we don't know anything, would they would that rn? maybe that look was meant to signify that he's gonna get himself killed by being stupid? but ig they would make him betray them (though was that a real hostage or also a dummy?)

ohhh we got powers here too? Jeff in Pit Babe needed to touch someone to see their future but ig it's just visions at random times here?

I wish the first 10 minute fight sequence was shorter because we knew nothing but the last 3-4 minutes was interesting because we see more of the characters at play beyond just fighting

1-2

Ah, it was a little educational test. I knew it was about cop training, so I guess this makes sense

Were the censored butts necessary lol

ohhh people don't believe Tharn can see the future and would make fun of him

Ohh Tharn's visions often include Phaya

Also at first I didn't get what iron rod they were talking about but I rewatched and seems like there are iron rods protruding from the poles

Man, Chart's gonna be like Winner (Pit Babe) isn't he? But maybe more skilled and so less pathetic but more dangerous? Equally annoying maybe?

Does Tharn like Phaya already?

Are the guys who keep calling each other Baby dating for real or is this a joke? So many dudes, can't keep track of who is who

omg are Tharn and Phaya becoming friends aw

I just realized from the comments Chart is Kawnah (from KawnahTurbo and TharnType's Lhong)

1-3

"a sign in your vision but couldn't stop it" oh is that why this is called The Sign

Oh Chart is gonna already? delightful

oh wtf, a sea monster?

woah gorgeous gorgeous beautiful sea monster for real, I was not expecting it to look so beautiful instead of kinda janky CGI

not the ethereal being reaching her hand out to rescue Phaya and that hand becoming Tharn's pulling him up

What's the thing Tharn always wanting to do

dang, that girl is Tharn? but like magical? his magical projection when he couldn't physically go to help Phaya?

not past life soulmates

Chart haunting this story by being annoying even after he's left goddamn

Shoulda dropped some money for the auntie before leaving for making a mess of her restaurant

Phi Yai so funny watching Tharn and Phaya run away hand in hand talking about feeling like his nong is about to fall in love

I'll be honest if i was a gay dude and my crush drew a girl who looked like me and had my name but again was a girl, I'd lose my shit

1-4

Why is P'Yai obsessed with Tharn and Phaya, it's so embarrassing for them >.<

ouuu not this random kiss

damn a Lieutenant died and was found in the water

Is the Lieutenant dead fr or no cuz why'd the other instructor kinda give Phaya the go-ahead to do some investigating on his own

man, Phaya and Tharn are so cute! At first during the 5 day training I'd thought they weren't friends but then became friends throughout it but obviously not

oh lol so the guys actually have something going on on-and-off

pls not Yai airing out everything about his bro including his single and virgin status

this bathroom scene why?? i'm so embarrassed but also shy

A tree? monster??

wtf how can you even drink to "Do you like someone at this table?" Like the answer is then obviously yes and the answers aren't very broad lol considering there are only 4 people and one of them is your brother. and there's also the guy that everybody is teasing you and him about

What a good first episode! I'm very intrigued both in terms of the romance (it's so cute idk like why do they interact in a way that makes me kinda shy) and the fantasy elements + mystery elements. The straight-up fighting elements are alright but I could do with less. Also, tragic that we're getting copaganda but oh well

Also, Pit Babe and The Sign started in November while Dead Friend Forever started in December. The people who watch these BLs weekly must've been having a ball with so many shows exploring new genres and high-concepts in BL. Also interestingly, both Pit Babe have Pavel and Billy who each have been in BLs before and lead them as one of the main pairs while their partners Pooh and Babe are new to the industry. Ta and the other guys apply a little less since Ta only had small roles before and Dead Friend Forever seems more ensemble cast but kinda similar ig

Ep 2 (Feb 20)

As expected, I have a hard time stopping watching a show when I start even though I have work to do.

Also, while looking for ep 1 gifs, I came across some stuff about the naga (snake) and eagle but I didn't read much into the post but I guess those creatures will feature prominently throughout the show

2-1

aghh I'd seen this hiding under blanket scene in a gif or tiktok or something before it's so aksldfj cute [or was it a kinda different scene? cuz feels like they were more giggly hmm]

Ah, Tharn wants to joing the Special Investigation Unit to investigate his dad's death (and Yai isn't related to him by blood)

Is Captain Akk with them? For now, I'm guessing he also wants answers and that's why he's wanting more evidence + telling Phaya to get evidence + not stopping the little group from investigating

2-2

But now he does seem kinda suspicious...

omg a siren call type thing?

hmm Phaya says that Tharn looks like the girl in his dream... was he sleepwalking when he started following the magical girl?

Oof they got caught but okay again, it seems like indeed the captains are also investigating the cause of death and are not against our main characters

2-3

gorgeous shot

ah, past lives talk again

now we have some real cops on our hands oof

oh wait hah they were taking 5 special investigation students and it just happens to be our 5 characters lol

so cute they're so cute omg

also glad that

I gasped out loud, whoever Tharn loves will die? omg, this show has Everything fr

2-4

ahhh no, that's probably not Phaya's gf, don't mourn, Tharn <- I say as somebody who is mourning

ack, Phaya is no annoying with intercepting the drink from Oat (random guy buying Tharn a drink) agh you're jealous, do you know that?

Wish the lyrics were translated

lol their Spin the Bottle never ends

The drinking obviously means the answer is yes, wtf don't be silly guys

Would Phaya have fr chosen Tharn? ah the questions

AND OF COURSE THEY'RE LONG LOST CHILDHOOD FRIENDS why would they not be? I'd thought they'd mention that Phaya also lives at the same province as Tharn and Yai when it was mentioned earlier in 2-3 (Nong Khai?) but then they didn't but I guess they indeed met each other at kids at that province

Yai in his drunken state still making Phaya give Tharn a piggyback ride and take him to his condo

Ah, this is what the "Billy and Heng playing enemies instead of friends" was about

Didn't mean to watch the Ep 3 teaser but omg Phaya has prophetic dreams or something?

I'm really into like... Billy's physicality? I don't know how to word this, just the way he carries himself, I guess. It's very Boy and I'm envious but it's also attractive

Ep 3 (Feb 21)

Watching this in the dark on my iPad at 2am

3-1

ah how do i feel about a love triangle hmmm like theoretically it could be good idk some passive aggressiveness and jealousy amongst the suitors. also saw something about the lore behind it like heng’s character is the naga who has loved Than forever vs Phaya is some eagle guy who is Tharn’s one true love who is meant to die over and over omg??

15th day of the 11th waxing moon seems an important day, Phaya used to dream of the magical girl only on that day but now he dreams of her more often

3-2

oh lol i straight up thought they were all already in Nongkai cuz that conversation had insinuated they’d all meet at Nongkai for some reason. this makes more sense

oh did Tharn do some people wrong in his past life and they are still after him for vengeance?

lol why is Phaya so surprised about the amulet thing, he had a big hunch from last night

ah, so Tharn has bad karma from his past life and his life is intertwined with Phaya’s who will make him experience bad things but can also free him fr the bad karma

Ah, Tharn gave Phaya the amulet on the night of 15th day of 11th waxing moon and that’s when the dreams used to happen. i guess that’s why Phaya said he needs to go to where the dreams started and came to this temple on this day

the first time the childhood amulet thing came up i was like lol not this childhood friends who forgot each other again trope but this is actually such a good interpretation of it. they met at this festival where Phaya was drowning and Tharn saved him after seeing a vision, similar to how many times Tharn has seen him in a vision + has saved him from drowning whether it be himself or his last girl self. and also the amulet that started Phaya’s dreams

and it’s not like the trope of perfectly fine adult relationship that had random childhood backstory for no reason. this one is that the reason they even have this adult friendship and crush is because they met each other that time and were told they’ll meet again since their lives are intertwined ah Phaya dreamt of the naga often as a child

ah so many things happening. so the naga keeps calling Phaya to the water or is it the girl? and the naga wants to drown him under there but Tharn’s past life girl/Tharn in this life doesn’t allow it?

and these last words are so heavy lol protect each other and undo your bad karmas

3-3

this Naga said No Peace for Phaya

The Naga festival and cave and myths are so cool

3-4

what??? i was like aw at the cheek kiss but then the liplick goodnight kiss happened and i was literally like is this a dream? is it just that Phaya is drunk and so is actually kissing Tharn like he wants to?

On the one hand, who gives a fuck if a serial killer is killing rapists, let it go - so annoying if cops and the justice system can't keep rapists off the streets but can put the people behind killing rapists behind bars agh

On the other hand, killer seems to just be the mastermind and forcing other people to do their dirty work and murder is too big of a thing to force people to do so agh I suppose they should stop them

Also, is this gonna be related to the Lieutenant's death at all or are we forgetting about that one? the methods of killing are different though

Not as many comments, esp in the last 2 parts despite the episode being like over 80 mins or smth cuz I was watching on my iPad and sometimes had my phone with me to write thoughts down and sometimes didn't.

Continues to be intriguing, put out so many different threads and it feels like we got a few answers but so many more questions.

Also, I didn't realize the actress playing Sand is a trans woman but yay, employing trans people let's gooooo and in roles that aren't making a fool of them either!

Ep 4 (Feb 21)

4-1

Noooo okay fuck this killer mastermind I can't believe they made the woman who was sexually assaulted by some dude and then had her case dismissed was forced to kill him under duress

omg the stepson who was raped by his stepfather and was forced to kill him, this killer is literally forcing the victims to kill the perpetrators and it must be so horrifying to kill somebody but, like the woman said, she was glad that he was dead and wouldn't be able to harm anybody

clown mask

ah this investigation itself could be a 12-16 ep procedural kdrama, I wonder how they're gonna deal with this as a side plot in this already high-concept show

Oh yeah, I didn't recognize Surprise (from SCOY) in last ep but he's the IT kid

got food to eat lunch as they're eating dinner but it's so hard to type now

who is this fortune-telling, face-changing, snake-bracelet wearing woman?

4-2

what is going onnnnn

oh kissing??? and caressing

a dream ofc makes sense. since that ep 3 kiss was real i thought may be this was as well

was that tharn in the pic that shattered

lmfao the finger in egg + licking it off + "I like it raw" ??

and then the sausage eating ahh Tharn let Phaya suck your dick, he's going crazy

hehe Phaya caught in his broken bike excuse

Tharn's secretiveness regarding Phaya spending the night makes it seem so much more salacious than it was

oh damn, it was just 3 days ago that Meena was kidnapped and forced to kill that guy?

ah, I don't remember her name but one of the SCOY girls!

fungal spores in their lungs, not gonna lie it reminds me of To Sir With Love mushrooms lol

Ah, I did wonder if somebody in their little quintuple (+ the boss Akk) was gonna betray the team but I suppose one of them could also be behind the mastermind killer

Why'd the criminal lowkey look like Akk?

Anyway, I kinda like that in 1-1 combat, Phaya wins over Tharn but Tharn's always out here saving Phaya because he can see when he's in danger heh

Also funny because the Abbot and the mystery woman was like never let go of Tharn and that Phaya's gonna help Tharn get rid of his bad karma, meanwhile Tharn's protecting Phaya all the time. guess it'll be balanced eventually

Ah, Phaya casually talking about getting stabbed to death and how it'd be solely his fault, nothing to do with Tharn. Meanwhile, Tharn has seen Phaya in near-death experiences like 5 times in his visions and saved him so far but is haunted by the experiences

4-4

Is it Akk and he's covering for himself by saying no fingerprints? Reminds me of Beyond Evil where Park Jeongje's fingerprints appeared in the forensics results but they made it disappear hmmm

pls not Tharn being like k whatever as he's jealous about Phaya and new girl Dao vs Phaya being like lemme Intervene as he's jealous about

Phaya is so annoying omg

Oof, did Tharn tell the doctor guy (man I can't remember Heng's character's name beyond it starting with C and similar to Shortcut) about Phaya's nightmares? Or did Doctor man come to find out about it some other way (since he's also connected to them via lifetimes? Is he sending nightmares and trying to drown Phaya on purpose or anything?)

Ah, so Doctor is decidedly a troublemaker/antagonistic and not accidentally so

omg Phaya is really angry (and violent :/)

AI to construct a face under a mask and hood, be serious girl, this cannot possibly be accurate

Okay, if this last murder is being done by the killer himself to avenge his sister who was raped and committed suicide, I think we should let him play it out. arrest him afterwards lol

I hope they clarify next ep that Tharn didn't tell the doctor about the dreams because he would never do that

Next ep has 5 parts woah and is gonna be like ~80 mins of runtime, these are pretty long episodes but don't feel that long and I don't feel the need to speed it up (except I think I did 1.1x once and also wanted to skip some of the gratuitous butt shots/that dream shower scene lol though I didn't)

I was kinda avoiding watching the dream sex scene (watched it in mini on the corner of my screen lol) and so I didn't have too many thoughts except once Phaya wrapped his palm around Tharn's neck. But going through people's gifsets, I've seen a few mentions of how we know this is a manifestation of Tharn's desires, whether it be the choking kink lol or liking getting pushed around dommed and that it's fun to actually get to see his fantasy like that. honestly a FAVE aspect when I think about it that way like aw his desire to be manhandled

Ep 5 (Feb 21)

I'm hungry and want to get dinner but am afraid that there'll be too much genetelia talk and will lose my appetite... maybe I'll gauge how gross it's gonna be first

Also, accidentally thought Ep 5 aired on Dec 24 and so ended up looking at tumblr posts made on Dec 23 (actual date it came out) and so was spoiled that the forensic guy was scheming with the murderer guy for this serial killing

5-1

oof shoulder check

okay I lied, I got too hungry and got dinner but am now gonna be unable to type for at least part 1 probably cuz food hands

okay I'm done eating and gotta say that hmmm too violent

Phaya is just too physically violent in his anger, especially the fact that he deliberately punched the wall beside Tharn's head and also accidentally backhanded him but didn't apologize. like I know we're meant to catch the range of emotions in his face, including guilt and apology for accidentally hitting but he purposefully doesn't apologize and yeah, nope

oh this fucker, why can't they just use this rapist as bait to catch the killer, why does he need to be protected. innocent man my ass

hm, the smaller black van is gonna get crashed into by a big white truck and the killer is seen with the van... is the rapist guy gonna be in the van when it crashes?

yess tomato tomato!

5-2

Man, they really had to have these killers force other people to do the first 3 murders in order to gain the audience support to stop the killer because like... what even is the reason for stopping them? If the cops and judicial system are gonna be useless, I think the little team should def kill this man as he's the reason their younger sister or gf is dead. should've teamed up to kill those other fuckers too tbh instead of involving the victims

let's kill him quickly (and painfully) before the cops come to stop you!

"I promise you that I will not let you die so easily" I get your need for torture but there are cops hunting you right now so hm

nah, not the amulet!

oh? is this guy naga too? the water magic thing?? also I think I saw a gif of Phaya fighting the killer and he had firey wrapped-up palms?

5-3

omg? Tharn taking the knife for Phaya and then somehow having red magic that defeats the blue man killer?

and he got a trinket? did Tharn get it from inside the killer? Was the killer wearing it?

oh hohoho Phaya saying he'll do everything Tharn says is really doing it for me

"The laws you worship and look up to can never keep those bastards behind bars for long" tell 'em. need these fuckass cops to be brought down a peg and get a sense of reality

rolled my eyes at Phaya's "There's the justice you're looking for. It might show up late but it will always come in the end." you cannot be this naive

that video the sister before she died was so fucked man i'm so sad now

stupid ass pep-talk from Captain Akk or whatever "I don't want a loser on my team" okay kys

enough copaganda, let's go back to the fantasy and romance and stuff because this story arc was so sad

Ah, so the car crash vision hasn't manifested yet

Or is that related to his parents death??

5-4

Ah, wearing the amulet again

pls Phaya prepping to make his moves

plssss both of them in their little fantasies

"I want to do just as you did to me" What? You wanna blow him? I acc have no clue why I'm so on the Phaya giving Tharn a blowjob train

not even little fantasies, incredibly long fantasies for both of them like okay Enough

but so funny like okay at least the first fantasy was Tharn dreaming but then he was getting off on that dream again the next morning in the kitchen while cooking and now here's Phaya with his fantasy while awake and mid-conversation

and also hilarious that Tharn's fantasy was like hand around neck + shower while Phaya's is... Tharn blowing on his wound like 40 times lol

Phaya's foiled plans

Oh, that's the gif I saw. Bandaged hands + black smokey magic from Phaya while grabbing Doctor by the shoulder??

lol Phaya speaking to Doctor as if he has any right to control who hangs around Tharn and to what degree. you forget yourself

"Until your time in done" ???

Ohh Phaya burned? Doctor's shoulder omg

not the sponge bath lmfao

lkasdfj the quick 123

Ah, Phaya being the bolster tonight

Phaya's taking advantage of sleeping Tharn fr but lol sure. I wonder if Tharn's also kinda awake lol

Phaya's dream: Freen magic woman -> Tharn and behind Phaya, very big eagle man (which is supposed to be him I guess?)

What happened this ep? Most of the beginning was focused on catching the killer, then the fantasy & staying over at Tharn's place, then being cute toward grandma. But stuff that happened in the middle: the killer can't remember what happened in the cellar but he def had magic (blue) and so did Tharn (red) - which he used to defeat the killer, Doctor and Phaya face-off where Phaya had black? coloured magic which burned Doctor - I wonder how much doctor knows? about the myth/past life stuff, the temple man (Luangpur?) told Tharn that Doctor and Phaya shouldn't meet. Then finally, the dream where we get Freen magic lady, kinda confirmation that she's indeed Tharn (this life), and also a visual of that tall eagle man. Also, from gifs, I realized that the amulet or whatever Tharn used to defeat the killer was his own, he tore it from his neck

Ep 6 (Feb 22)

6-1

I love the eagle fr I'm obsessed w the beautiful Naga from ep 1 too

ahhh lesbians !!!!!!!!!! hehehehehe

I don't care that much about this side couple and their backstory, let's hurry it up

lmfaooo okay funny but I would've murdered someone if all my papers went into the water like that

SCOY mention

huh?? Tharn dated someone and they died?

5-2

Why did Dao's actor become worse at acting? :( I think the script here is just bad because why would a character just recite these things? and they made her cross some lines with her "advice" about Phaya like you guys may be close but you can't say that you think he should quit his work lol

the triangulations lmfao I'm glad that even though Dao seems to care for Phaya a lot, she doesn't necessarily like him like that?

heh Nee coming to sus out if Phaya and Dao were ever a thing

and Phaya clocking that Nee and Dao are into each other lol

I like their little sibling relationship full of teasing but also Nee trying to guide Phaya into grandma's good graces

Dang, what's this painting the man thought was sold at the gallery about?

Okay, in this universe, it's just like ours where the stories of Naga and Garuda are thought to be myths/legends. I kept getting confused how much regular people believed because everybody seemed to believe whatever the monk said but that involved a lot of fantastical aspects + the Naga festival, so I wasn't sure what people in general believed (not just what Phaya and Tharn who are like reincarnations or smth of magical creatures believe lol)

6-3

pls let Tharn and Phaya have scenes together this section

oh man Phaya’s tendency to just do instead of speak and also drag Tharn around is kinda… agh

dang Doctor straight up said he’d seerate the two of them even if it means Tharn dies

oof punch but can’t quite blame Tharn

6-4

art something or other, who is this suspicious guy?

Was too sleepy to write anything for 6-4 but I have half-baked thoughts about the punch ig. On some YT comments and tiktok comments, I saw people annoyed at Tharn for not believing Phaya and people were calling him too stubborn and naive. I do think he should've taken Phaya's warnings/dreams more seriously cuz like girl, you're always seeing visions of him in danger so it can't be that much of a stretch to think he dreams of you in danger c'mon. But I also think Phaya is kinda too vague and doesn't explain properly like he can't just expect to burst in and physically drag Tharn away from Doctor who he has known for years and years and trusts; in contrast, Phaya and Doctor fought and Phaya even physically pushed him or whatever. So I get Tharn being like wtf... and also Phaya being desperate.

I hope they make up next ep (properly. through conversation and honesty and understanding) so that we can get them together again though bc we barely had them together this ep and unfortunately unlike Pit Babe ep 11 where the other characters were able to carry the ep w/o much Babe or Charlie, I don't care as much about the characters here.

Ep 7 (Feb 22)

7-1

As a mix of Death's Game murder artist + last ep's ending where Tharn saw someone (I'm assuming this guy) in a room maybe killing someone with red everything, I thought this guy (Art?) was gonna kill his (ex?)-lover. I still think that's the case cuz of the ending with all the red paint probably hiding the blood but lol at first, I literally thought the guy was asking to be killed and used to Art's painting lmfao but nah he wasn't that devoted, mans was getting married to someone else anyway

Anyway, cool idea, will be cooler once we realize he killed him

7-2

My biggest rip is that Wi can actually act while Dao's actress cannot, so I wish the actresses were switched or Nee's love interest was Wi

hm, so the VIP is the Minister Montree and we didn't get any visions or anything but Inspector Akk kinda makes me think he's behind Lieutenant Tam's death and I wonder if Tharn thinks he's behind his parents' death or at least the coverup. I also just realized is this the guy they were saying has ties to drug stuff that Lieutenant Tam was investigating and the rapist from last ep is tied with him too but they can't interrogate the rapist about him?

lol they talked about this after I wrote allthat

hmm Art said "That's too evill" before maybe puncturing the guy with a pen... so did that man himself suggest it?

I wish the camerawork focused on the art and dance better since it went on for so long

7-3

"To me, a guy named Kao, is already dead" oh man

Why is Phaya as a guest restraining the woman when there are so many cops who came to volunteer or whatever lmfao

Anyway, I thought they were gonna maybe pretend this was also part of the exhibition before he accidentally cut her (with the same pen that killed Kao? and was maybe gonna stab Montree with?)

Is Doctor doing some sort of dark influence/magic on Art? and the way he's physically touching Art on his thigh and then his chest over his heart and then hugging him... no.

okay atp Tharn Has to be kinda suspicious of Doctor knowing about Phaya's dreams/conditions and why he's using it against Phaya (and publicly too) and idk the way he's undermining Phaya like that... is he trying to make other people think of him as hysterical? As if he'd have an outburst similar to Art? but then Phaya almost becomes violent - strengthening Doctor's position...

ah yes, just casual handing over patient records to the cops <3 esp because Art isn't like... actually in jail or anything, idek what they're holding him based on. just cuz of a public outburst and possibly suspicion of maybe a reason behind Kao being missing? like c'mon cops are so fucking shit

bruh why are these cops just saying anything and everything about the case in front of the doctor? dumbasses

7-4

Tharn can see into a painting like this?

The Art and Kao hallucination (?) is so eerie, everything about this is so eerie, I really like it

omg so Kao was really selling the art and betraying Art

I love love love the spliced scene from that night and the same scene in a white room as Tharn and Phaya watch it (I'm assuming Art is recounting it?)

crazy ass pen to be able to rip somebody's throat open and kill them just like that

Oh, so they don't think Art has something to do with Kao's disappearance... but does that man disappearance of Kao the alive man (maybe he ran away abroad with Montree lol and that's how Montree had known to whisper to Art about it being the pen that hurt Kao) or his dead body?

okay at least the pen didn't kill Kao the way they were insinuating lmao I was like tf kinda pen

7-5

I actually cannot, Phaya and Doctor must be Stopped

oh confession ahhhhhh <333

lmfao I'm watching the shower scene in mini on the side lol too much for me

It Continues like okay Enough i'm like watching in mini with 1 eye only enough enough enough i'm so embarassed/shy I think after barely watching anything for so long and then only recently starting watching shows again that have NC scenes (kinda Law of Attention, Pit Babe, and now this) means that I've lost a lot of the tolerance I've built up against it lmfao

Ep 8 (Feb 22)

5 episodes left and they're each fairly short compared to some other ones (each is less than an hour I think?) so I hope they have proper time to wrap everything up in a satisfying way, esp with all the fantasy going on

8-1

omg? The book flipping to Doctor's face to make it seem like he's watching it all was creepy enough last ep but now he tried to kill Phaya via magic dream?? and only stopped because the monk woke Tharn up

I hope Tharn starts actually thinking about the Doctor critically now

They're so cute, I'm glad we can have cute Phaya and Tharn back for a bit because they were really upset with each other for the past 2 eps (and then resulting sex scene but that's still not cuteness yknow)

8-2

Having Phaya promise to not leave... sad if he does end up getting hurt/leaving/whatever and ironic if it's Tharn instead

Wait I'm so confused? Was the Doctor somehow shrouding Tharn and that's why Phaya couldn't see him?

omg even making Phaya see an illusion of Tharn, then once Phaya gets in the water, taking control of him

8-3

oh we finally get to see the past

Also this other world reminds me of Midnight Museum a bit

hm Tharn plays the past "sister" Wansa? I'd expected Freen... but maybe they don't wanna have to have Billy and Freen in such romantic situations etc

I'm South Asian but not Indian or Hindu, so it's very interesting to see these costumes/myths which are vaguely familiar but I'm not fully aware of because idk much about Hindu concepts beyond like the most well-known gods and festivals

ngl I'm slightly confused still but sure

The amlet is Wansarut's original SOUL? damn girl

ENOUGH of calling Wansarut her nong sao/younger sister. Tharn isn't a girl in this life at least, so say nong if you must why are you saying your sister and Phaya are in love when Tharn's now your brother agh

Bad CGI but I forgive because all the Thai show CGI has looked like this I think?

8-4

Kao died in the waters... I wonder if Doctor had something to do with it with his evil water magic since he knew Art and stuff and used Art as a way to get into the investigation...

oh never mind, killed somewhere else and dumped here

why not at least say Yai follow that man with me!

ohhhh that car crash vision was actually a flashback of him and his parents

ah, the scene with Tharn screaming while holding Phaya's still body

I commented about the gender thing like why are we doing Tharn as a girl bc it was kinda... why are we actually just pretending the character who is seemingly the bottom [I mean they're vers to Me but idk about canon lol] and sexually submissive is the girl fr instead of having an actual woman play Wansarut but then I saw a post that said that actually she takes on a female form under water but took on a male form above ground and yay gender fuckery and i'm like okay nice sure, I love gender fuckery.

I wish we got... slightly more time and a more coherent story that Showed the past life story better. I think this show is good with broad themes and parallels and characterization but kinda struggles sometimes with specific moments/scenes, which can make it kinda confusing or unsatisfying - this scene of the past life kinda feels like that to me.

Ep 9 (Feb 23)

9-1

yep Tharn is def gonna be like fuckkk ppl whom I love with die because I love them (and i mean in this case Doctor is making that true) and probably gonna withdraw and breakup after Phaya wakes up

since that Eye Contact moment with Montree’s bodyguard in ep 7? or whatever art gallery, it’s been clear this guy is suspicious and behind some stuff

Montree got Tharn parents killed and wants to kill him now

9-2

Okay so at least Inspector Akk seems to be on the hood side and also knows way more about the case like Korn (the bodyguard?) was behind this

who is Akk talking to?

The disparity between Ning and Dao’s actinng skills is just too much, why didn’t they make Dao be played by Wi the art gallery woman or Marys the forensic officer who are both better at acting ahhh

9-3

huh? why doesn’t Phaya have the Naga amulet? it came off in the water or something?

this is just silly what is even happening

wtf Chart? is that even a fr tattoo? Montree got someone else to get the tattoo/join the gang to throw ppl off his own trail or what

9-4

hopefully a real break from the cop stuff even though ig Tharn’s gonna investigate on his own

I wish Phaya would explain more to Tharn rather than being so cryptic

plssss man snuck out of her hospital to not only meet his past life love but also to have sex despite nearly dying for a few days

aw I wish this NC scene was longer, I’m kinda better at hanging these soft and loving sex scenes more than the crazy shot Horny desperate ones I think?

Also, Phaya kissing down from Tharn's chest and staying kinda on stomach in a similar fashion to how Tharn did it to Phaya during the shower sex scene... I'm gonna take it to allude to Phaya finally sucking Tharn's dick, I've waited for this moment for multiple episodes

Ep 10 (Feb 23)

10-1

Okay, discussion, good! And Phaya didn't tell Tharn about the Doctor but that's because the Abbott told him not to, so it's okay IMO

And it's a cute scene with the cuddling and just so domestic with how casual it is

Phaya was so desperate to make sure Tharn was okay (and also thirsty for that dick...) that he forgot to bring his phone or inform his grandmother and sister like omg

10-2

Phaya is so cute puppy as he's apologizing

Yai shut uppppp the music and vibes makes it seem like Grandma's gonna be okay but what if she wasn't and you outed them D:

pls the Grandma being like "Give me a second" before asking Phaya what the important thing he wants to say is aklsdfj so funny

Awww so supportive and cute T-T

Khem suspecting Inspector Akk of being in cahoots with Montree

SCOY and Gap mention

10-3

dang, is someone in the unit gonna betray them again? We already had Wit or whoever

ah, Tharn overhearing Phaya and the abbott about Doctor... Can I hope he won't do anything stupid lol

lmfao the grandmas complaining, so true

Tharn wants to quit his job after solving his father's case and just stay with his grandma? girl I wish I was rich omg

10-4

agh, Korn and Khom are same person then right? Cuz they're not consistent in naming

oof, Ning dead

lmfao I saw a post w the pic of the "A tiger-man is not real" line by Phaya with caption whatever you say bird-man like so true

everything converging in Nongkai i suppose

Ep 11 (Feb 23)

One episode until hopefully tomorrow morning it's ep 12? Cuz then it's perfect timing. Otherwise, it'll suck lol

11-1

Is the tiger-man and the person died related to this Montree drug ring

Is the instructor knowing about the visions gonna backfire or anything?

So many times people just overhear things lol like Ep 4 Phaya overhearing Tharn and Yai talking about the visions, Ep 10 Tharn hearing Phaya and Abbott talking about Doctor and stuff, and now Khem overhearing Phaya and Tharn discuss his footprints lol

No I get Tharn cuz it's like why does my lover claim to be so jealous of this guy who I've known for years and trust? To Tharn, it feels like Phaya doesn't trust Tharn

oh oops, he doesn't believe Phaya even he's told directly anyway, which I feel like is theoretically understandable like wtf are you even saying Phaya but if you believe the rest of it with past lives and naga and garud, then this is like yeah sure i suppose that makes sense lol + I thought he overheard Phaya and Abbott but no I guess??

ooh cool shot about the grandma to the flashback

omg ?? Doctor in child Tharn's room talking about how they'll be together when the times comes um ??

10-2

Oh, I just realized that the man who Inspector Akk was speaking with was actually probably Chart. like he's there to infiltrate and give info to Akk (and that's also why he hasn't resigned as a cop maybe)

sorry everytime Phaya's exasperated about the Tiger Man, I want him to be more real. like girl you believe you are a Garud reincarnated who is in love with Naga princess reincarnation and have been lovers in the past lifetime(s) and also that a current Doctor is actually a Naga like right now in his own current lifetime. your boyfriend has visions and you have dreams.

10-4

Dang, the cliff falling and surviving should’ve been more exciting I feel like? kinda feels like History 3: Trapped when Tang Yi and Shaofei got out of the forest out of screen lol

ah im really into the last scene bc it’s once again giving vers switch framing with the way that Tharn’s palm is not Phaya’s neck this time + That is sitting slightly taller than Phaya who has to look up at him

I feel like even with a 15 min longer ep they could’ve made part 4 more emotionally charged on-screen idk i might be nitpicking also, so funny cuz I thought Ep 12 was gonna be airing at 11am or so but then I finish watching this ep at like 9:04 or smth and see The Sign ep 12 live premiere schedule recommended on my YT feed and part 1 is airing right now cuz apparently the ep is releasing at 9 ig

Ep 12 (Feb 24)

Accidentally read a couple words of BLupdate's tweet for the ep and apparently Doctor sacrifices his soul? interesting ig

12-1

Doesn't trust anybody but does trust Chart lol

Okay but atp someone (else) from their unit Has to betray them right? Like Inspector Akk has mentioned it so many times

extremely hilarious to have Phaya who was limping around moments ago and Tharn go in guns blazing in casual clothes while all the other cops are in full gear and bulletproof vests etc

Do any of these gunshots from either side injure/kill anybody at all lmfao

oh finally some ppl (villainous) just drop dead from the shots lol

12-2

agh, Yai and Sand are honestly so cute >.<

So funny for Phaya to be talking about protecting Tharn like yes agree but throughout the show, Tharn has definitely protected you much more lol

Ah, I'm noticing the lighting choices after reading posts about it like the bokeh effect for Phaya and the concentrated warm colours for Tharn

Okay, I can watch this subdued and softer version of sex scene more than the desperate/erratic first one

okay lol ended up skipping last minute or so though heh

10-3

omg gorgeous, beautiful shots and directing and acting for Phaya finding Tharn gone and the whole desperate sequence with the grandma, Yai, the Abbott etc

Ah, Phaya saying that even if hadn't remembered their past lives and past loves, he still would have loved Tharn in this current life, exactlyyyyy that's what I wanna hear

The endless number of times (well, 3) Tharn runs in front of Phaya to protect him

12-4

noo he was taken to the Naga cave and is gonna recover, trust. maybe the Doctor is gonna sacrifice his soul or something to save him, who knows heh

From the flashbacks here and in part 3, I do miss the earlier days when we knew there was Lore but didn't know it yet and they were just cute and such. I very often feel this with paranormal fantasies where the earlier parts of knowing there's something happening but not yet knowing and slowly discovering is my favourite part - when things are simple, yet intriguing

wait I have a question, did Khem die or what? like is he just in the hospital?

Also, Billy in this hospital room looks a bit like Saint?

omg I was like who is that with the long hair but it's Phaya, I guess it has been many months

ah, I was wondering if it'll be 15th days of 11th waxing moon again for Tharn to come home and yeah, guess it's been a whole year fr

man, I wish the meeting again had a bit more fanfare because the despair was done so well, c'mon

Ah, so Doctor didn't die, just gave Tharn his Naga soul to keep him alive but I guess that doesn't kill the Doctor, idk. and he's letting them love each other now

Aw cute but again, anti-climactic and not enough relief, not enough time, not enough emotional impact. I wish they had maybe shown some of Tharn's time there (though that might've taken a bit away from Phaya's desperate situation? idk)

Update: lol I didn't realize there was a little after-credits scene with Saint cameo and season 2 bait

no fr what is that ending, Tharn stayed with Doctor for a year on purpose? and Doctor decided to just get over it? And so Tharn appears all casually over the hill a year later? Seriously needed a stronger ending.

Overall:

I think I liked the first few eps and the potential of the series and the possibilities more than I liked the actual series oof. Since everybody freaking loved this, I also had high expectations.

I just went through the gifs I'd reblogged (I reblogged A Lot cuz I thought I'd end up liking the show more than I ended up liking. went and deleted a bunch bc I was like why did I even reblog this one, what's the point) and I really did like more of the show's gifs from the earlier eps (whereas I enjoyed the analysis and stuff more in the later eps). Don't even feel like reblogging any ep 11 or 12 stuff now though, except maybe the checking under bed sequence. It was also just clear from how invested I was in an episode while watching because in the earlier eps, I was paying more attention and watched an ep in one sitting whereas in the latter half, I would pause in the middle of a section to go on my phone or even just stop watching the ep after a section, do stuff and then come back to finish.

I thought there would be more focus on the romance and fantasy and past lives aspect and less on the cop activity. Like there was no need to spend That much time on the rapist killer case nor Art and Kao's case, we could've spent that time on something like following up on what Lieutenant Tam had learned and the drug case/Tharn's father's case more directly along with more of the actual past lives and fantasy and such. In fact, we got so little about their past lives, I thought there were 4 cycles or something?

I don't know man, I feel like they didn't choose the correct things to show on screen? This sucks because they clearly put in So Much Effort and tried so many new things for BL, so I wish I had loved it more and was more attached.

I think most of the fight scenes and stuff were confusing and not choreographed very well and some interactions/moments/explanations needed to like have more time dedicated to them. However, some moments were just shot/directed so beautifully like ep 11 when grandma is going through the flashbacks of seeing Doctor with Tharn as a child and uni student etc from that single room and ep 12-3 when Phaya wakes up to find Tharn gone, looks under the bed, and the whole sequence after that. (Unfortunate that the reunion scene was so meh).

So many parallels and gifsets of parallels, I keep having to remember my parallels tag is for across different shows while compilation in the tag for same show. I enjoy the parallels and the thought put behind them. It also shows like the cyclical nature of Phaya and Tharn's lives, and it would've been even more impactful if we saw more of their past lives (the original one or the 2 that occurred in the middle apparently).

Highly doubt I'm gonna think of the characters again, I somehow stopped being attached to them about halfway through. Really wanted to give it at least a 7 for trying so many things but don't think it earned it sadly. They tried so many things, as shown in the list of tropes below, but I don't think they satisfyingly merged them or chose the correct things to focus on on-screen.

Running list of tropes: A mix of romance and fantasy lol

Monsters and Cryptids: Sea Monster (naga?), the woman Freen is playing, that tree dude (whatever happened to him? Was that Doctor or something?). Update: the monsters/dieties are the main characters themselves

Police training/cop academy

Murder mystery + a Serial Killer murder mystery + drug ring bust

Tharn seeing the future/people in danger (specifically often seeing Phaya in danger)

Past lives/reincarcation/soulmates

The person Tharn loves will die

Childhood friends (who Tharn gave the locket to). Update: just a fated childhood meeting more like

Does Spin The Bottle count lmao

Love triangle

Lesbians, let's go

Rating: 6/10 [May 12, 2024 Update: Decreased by 0.5 stars when rerating shows I’ve watched in 2024: 6.5 -> 6]

[the-dark-abyss]

I posted 65 times in 2022

That's 40 more posts than 2021!

23 posts created (35%)

42 posts reblogged (65%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@sleepytime-moga

@seafoamfucker

@ma2ereki

@oda-haruko

@vampnightwing

I tagged 54 of my posts in 2022

Only 17% of my posts had no tags

#rambling - 20 posts

#mafia 3 - 13 posts

#goncharov - 12 posts

#john donovan - 8 posts

#mafia iii - 7 posts

#ouatih - 6 posts

#lincoln clay - 5 posts

#thoughts - 4 posts

#mafia 3 definitive edition - 4 posts

#cars - 3 posts

Longest Tag: 115 characters

#lincoln is my fave character but lack of fleshed out story for donovan makes me hyperfocus on him and i wanna fight

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Mafia 3

Okay so I’m gonna take the L and admit I’ve never played the other 2 games, I just watched the cut-scene movies on YouTube, and while I enjoyed the story and characters of the first 2, when I watched Mafia 3′s it DID something to me. So I actually went out and got the game so I can play it all myself.

First things first, I’m gonna wonder why people seem to hate this game so much until the day I die, sure it’s glitchy but not as bad as any Bethesda glitch I’ve seen and nothing game breaking, more or less just funny stuff like “lol that cop car exploded in the middle of the street. I’m gucci tho.”. I really like the time-period cause I actually like learning about the 60′s in American history because SO MUCH important stuff was set in motion back then. Others seem to not like how it’s nt focused on the Italian Mafia anymore and...sure?? I guess?? I mean they’re still there, you’re allied with some Italians while taking out the bigger Italian crime family (I think they’re mad that the protag is black and it’s an important part of the game tbh) And another complaint I see a lot is the games too repetitive, I think that’s the lamest excuse personally. I played this after I beat Far Cry 6, and honestly? It was NICE! I like being able to sneak and take people down, or just blow up everything!  Maybe it’s cause I’m autistic perhaps (ASD gang rise up!) but having a pattern was nice for me, I have a specific way of playing and it was fun. Hell, I’ve beat the game twice already cause it felt nice to play.

I know this game came out in 2016 and I’m way late to the party, I became aware of the Mafia series in 2021 and finally played Mafia 3 in March 2022. And I need to be physically restrained from playing it a third time lol.

See the full post

7 notes - Posted June 20, 2022

#4

Found this under Nuit Blanche in the alt escape route.

I've never seen this in the game before this is so cool!

7 notes - Posted October 1, 2022

#3

Because I’m on the Spectrum™...

I would post this on my art blog but what good would that do? I guess this is unofficially also a fandom blog... anyways

So! A thing I like doing is figuring out timelines, time frames, dates and fun stuff like that. And I gotta say, the timeline of events in Mafia 3 is INFURIATING! And according to THIS it’s the lead world designers preferred playthrough. I know I probably should take this with a huge grain of salt, but going by this it throws so many things out of wack (especially making Sign of the Times be the last DLC story you touch)

So, February 27th is when things kinda kick off, Lincoln’s friends and family are killed and he’s left for dead by the Marcanos.

Bullet wound takes on average 2 months at most to recover from (from mixed sources 😵)

Lincoln was still bed ridden when MLK was assassinated on April 4th. So I assume he was walking a bit after that, mid-April.

So mid April is when he was up moving around and getting things set up.

The DLC’s, despite not supposing to be in order, 1 of them has a specific date correlated with it.

The DLC stories become available after you get have all the under bosses and do that Sit Down mission.

The “Sign of the Times” DLC introduces character, Anna McGee, without getting too much into it, her death date on her grave is “June 6th 1968

So, set time or no, this implies the cult shenanigans happen immediately while Lincoln is getting into contact with Cassandra, Vito and Burke and he’s juggling them on top of this.

Must happen only in the span of a few days, not even a week.

For the rest of June, I guess Lincoln works at a more normal pace but still a lot going on at once.

For reason the only record date one of the Marcano Capo’s is Lou, and that’s in July, so I assume the Judge gets clapped early July.

That text at the bottom:

This threw me off but I realized it probably took a sec for the charges to process.

See the full post

10 notes - Posted July 5, 2022

#2

Hey I have a weird thought, do tumblr gays have a specific version of Brad Pitt they latch onto? There's him in Fight Club and Interview with a Vampire thats all I can think of.

I finally got a version of Brad Pitt I latched onto recently and I just kinda noticed it.

Is this common?

16 notes - Posted October 9, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

AND ANOTHER THING-

About Mafia 3

Some thoughts about characters and how some folks treat them:

John Donovan: Love this guy, wish I had more info about him that isn't all surface level and stuff I had to make up for a headcanon, but jeez I swear, at least on YouTube comments, it’s like people want to make him the Mafia games equivalent of Deadpool. Cause he’s “wacky” and “chaotic” and they want him to be the next games protag, once again, love this guy, but oh my god, NO! I think he works best as a side character and at most a secondary protag (like for Stones Unturned). If there was a game with him...what would it be? Just assassinate politicians in the 70′s simulator? Won’t be a Mafia game then would it unless he goes back to the Clay Family. That’s just YouTube comments I see though, but I got thoughts.

Vito Scaletta: I have to be clear, I DO LIKE Vito, but I think I liked him more in Mafia 3, very much Italian Uncle I deeply deserved in life vibes, I will admit though, even though I like him in M3, I feel like the devs leaned in on him being there as like, a selling point? While I enjoyed M2, I will admit as faves in order go, it’s Mafia 3, Mafia 1, and Mafia 2. Vito was getting dragged along for a lot of the events in M2 and boy, Joe was.... I wouldn't want him for a friend. Vito can be all messed up about what happened to Joe, but when I watched the cutscene movie for M2 I thought Joe was awful to Vito. Vito needs better friends :/ (also even tho I’m usually on team “RAIL THAT OLD MAN!” I think the Lincoln/Vito ship is odd, def not my thing and yet somehow not as offensive as the next character I’m about to bring up though.)

Giorgi Marcano: Oh boy where do I begin with him... I see...so many people sympathize with him or simp for him and it feels SO GROSS. (Imma be honest this mf is ugly he looks like a monkey with his busted hairstyle. Like if someone made a realistic Westernized Lupin the III but somehow removed all the charm from him). I feel like people seem to have forgotten he handed the Hollow over the the Dixie Mafia on a silver platter, that or they don’t care. The Hollow is the Black community in the game and the Dixie Mafia is all Southern Pride and Lynch mobs, all those Confederate flags... And I know that Giorgi KNEW THIS. I see people saying he was just doing what his dad said, and sure to an extent but it’s clear he enjoys what he does (He was so hyped to tell Sal what he did to Olivia), I will never forget what the Dixie boy’s did to Perla’s, to the young black women they forced to take drugs and exploited, the the specific targeting of the Black and Haitian communities in game, what they did to Casandra, etc. Giorgi was a spoiled violent Daddy’s boy that either was playing Lincoln, Ellis and Danny the whole time, or didn't care about them enough to even protest Sal’s orders against them. Even in his death scene, he never tried to apologize to Lincoln even if he knew the apology wouldn't have saved him. If they showed that, then sure I would at least admit he did care about Lincoln and all his friends that were killed, but no he didn't, just him and his old man. (PUTTING EEEEEVERRYYOOONE ON A LIST WHO SHIP LINCOLN/GIORGI! I CAME FROM THE FAR CRY FANDOM AND I’M SICK OF SEEING SO MUCH RACISM IN CHARACTER PORTRAYALS AND SHIPS! SICK AND TIRED!)

Game story and themes:

I will praise this game to the moon and back, despite it’s “flaws” like the glitches and game play. The glitches were not game breaking for me and I liked the game play honestly (I have ASD so that probably contributes to it). The driving is good despite me being a bad driver and I liked the how the weapons worked.

But I do have some thoughts about what I think was kinda lackluster and disappointing.

Lack of highlighting how horrible the Vietnam war was, condemning the army and the C.I.A. I know that’s so specific but you can’t have a Vietnam vet without having some kind of toll that it took on him, most of Lincoln’s trauma was mostly just centered around what happened to his family after he got back home, and some stuff in his childhood. Which is valid those things are traumatizing but idk, were the devs afraid? Also I know Donovan during the game is still technically in the C.I.A until he officially leaves in 1969, and he’s like, a big JFK stan, but like, does he know what Kennedy’s plans were for the C.I.A, is he blindly loyal? Was it game? I mean I know he does leave it but he’s been in the game for like 15 years, what’s going on? What’s all those war crimes for? Do the devs at Hangar 13 and 2K not wanna be put on some weird list? I don’t know, man.

My taste for found crime families keeps getting un-quenched: Looking back at the promo trailers showing Lincoln and all his under-bosses working together, with Donovan even tagging along, and seeing how the game actually played out... ow. The under-bosses hate each other, every convo between Lincoln and Cassandra feels like it leads to an argument, Burke was racist to Lincoln at the start, and....actually Vito seems like the most pleasant despite being a sad middle aged man so I’ve give him that. The most we get to them showing respect for each other is if you go to pick up kickback and talk more to them, then they’ll say nice things about each other.

Ex: Cassandra saying Vito isn't as bad as she thought, she thinks Burke is really fun. Vito thinking Burke is funny. And Burke having respect for what Vito's been through and weirdly enough, oddly respectful of her beliefs.

But that’s it, and they have no idea who Donovan is either even though he’s been working behind the scenes. And with how they are in game, I know they would NOT like him, I think Cassandra would hate him the most cause she gave Lincoln flak for willingly joining the army (I mean she’s right, I agree with her.).

So in that aspect I’m a little <:/ about. Not everything can be perfect.

OKAY THATS ALL FOR NOW!

25 notes - Posted June 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[doexoeyes]

Hiiiii ! ✨

My Name's Aya, it's sooo nice to stumble upon ur blog !

I, well wanted to make a request (If u could take one ofc) cause obviously i like ur writing or else I wouldn't be here hehe...

Well, I've been thinking, How 'bout a tasm! College Peter x reader, where she owns a flower shop (she kinda stopped college bcz she dosen't have enough money to continue)

She meets peter when he came once to buy flower for his aunt and they get to y'know, joke arround and get to know each other and laugh (he's nervous, but she's cocky and funny so he gets more comfortable with her within sec) (maybe he gets interested about which flowers to pic and she helps him) (I say "she" but could also be a Gn reader no prob) and they became freind and all and she opens up to him ? Maybe he even saves her as spiderman, then she caught feeling for him, but he told her once that he have a crush on gwen so she's always here to help him pick her flowers and all (reader and gwen could be freinds or not) but basically she believes he would be happy with gwen more than he will with her because she's just stuck in her small world without money or freind.

Butt, she's also super optimistic, strong and funny so that's why he fell for her, she also is a great fan of spider-man and have theory's about his identity every time.

Anyways, so if they end up together or not that's up to you darlin' but a story like this one would be veeeeeery wholesome and cute to read ✨

Also sorry this is suuuuper long, I tried ma best to visulize the idea I have in my mind and it turns out that it's soo long sorryyy, hope you liked it though but not sure if you would like to write about it, but if u do, I would really appreciate it, have a good day/Night 💕

hello aya ! ✨ you are absolutely lovely, thank you so much for being so kind & sending a request. it’s actually my first one & I really love this idea ! the details you gave made it exciting to write so I hope I did it justice & thank u for taking the time to send this in 🤧🤍

Pairing: Tasm!Peter x Gn!reader

Warnings: None.

Aunt May has finally graduated from nursing school and Peter wants to get her something special so he decides on a nice bouquet of flowers from a local shop near his apartment.

That local shop just so happens to be yours.

When he enters, he’s nervous in typical Peter fashion, not really knowing what to do or what to ask for so he’s a rambling mess at first.

“Yeah, I’m sorry it’s just..I wanted to get a nice bouquet for someone. I didn’t want to get those pre-made ones from the grocery store though, cause they just feel like not personal, you know? And most of the time the flowers are wilted or sad looking and today’s a big day for her so I wanted to get something really special ‘cause she deserves that and you probably don’t have to know all that and I’m so sorry,” he says, avoiding your gaze as he lets out a nervous chuckle.

Thankfully you’re nice and understanding and he’s incredibly grateful that you don’t make him feel like an idiot and instead help him pick out a stunning bouquet of peach peonies, white dahlias and sprigs of baby’s breath sprinkled throughout.

He’s impressed and ecstatic and his excitement warms your heart because there’s nothing cuter than a guy being giddy over flowers.

You crack some jokes as you wrap them up and he becomes much more relaxed as the conversation progresses.

So much so that he realizes he’s actually seen you before…

“Hey. Don’t you go to Empire State? I think we had English Lit together last year?”

You purse your lips as you finish tying a white bow at the base of the bouquet.

“I used to, actually. Yeah. You’re Peter, right?”

You notice his face light up at your recognition.

“Y-yeah. Peter Parker. I haven’t seen you around campus again though. Did you transfer schools?”

“Nah. I dropped out,” you say plainly and you notice the way his eyes slightly widen before he tries to play it off.

“Turns out running a business while juggling classes and pulling all nighters for finals is an impossible task. I don’t recommend it.”

“You own this store? That’s really cool. Congrats” he says as he looks around in awe.

“Actually, it belongs to my mom. But she umm..she got really sick so she can’t work anymore. And with my dad being out of the picture and no relatives willingly to step up to the plate, I kinda had no choice but to take up the family business. It’s a good thing I like flowers,” you say with a snort.

Peter’s staring at you with a mix of pity and sympathy and although you know he means well, it makes you slightly uncomfortable because you didn’t mean to overshare so much personal information with him.

“Sorry. Can you tell that I do nothing but talk to plants all day? My social skills are literally non existent. Anyways, these are beautiful and I hope that special someone you're going to give them to likes them.”

He chuckles at this and when you respond with a raised brow, he clarifies.

“These are for my Aunt May. She just graduated from nursing school.”

You remember Peter fairly well from school. He used to sit in the row ahead of you in your Statistics class, and one day when you had overslept and showed up late, Peter handed you his notes for you to keep so you wouldn’t be completely lost.

It was a simple gesture, but it was sweet and you appreciated it till this day. So his clarification that the flowers weren’t intended for a significant other sends butterflies fluttering throughout your stomach.

Until he continues.

“There’s no special person in my life. Well, at least, not yet. There is one girl though…her name is Gwen and…I don’t know,” he says with a shrug but his love sick expression says it all and you’re ready to puke.

“That’s great. I wish you luck with her then. And maybe the next time you’re buying flowers, it’ll be for that special someone,” you say with a teasing smile.

You remember Gwen from school as well. She was great. Beautiful, smart, nice. You completely understood why Peter was head over heels.

It still didn’t change the fact that you were a little disappointed though.

After you hand him the flowers, he’s out the door for what you assume was the last time.

But you assumed wrong.

Peter comes back the following week, and then the next, and the next, and soon he visits during your lunch break with take away containers or coffees in hand and sometimes keeps you company when you're closing up the shop.

You bond over your shared love for the same music and movies and sense of humor, but one thing that surprisingly brings you together is your love for Spider-Man.

“He’s the absolute coolest person on the planet. I mean, come on! Spider powers? Swinging around the city, web slinging the bad guys out of the way? A total badass!”

Your praise for the masked vigilante feeds Peter’s ego of course, but he just thinks it’s really cute how your eyes light up in excitement whenever you talk about your favorite ‘superhero’. Especially when your favorite topic comes to play.

“These are my prime suspects for Spidey’s true identity. I’ve been working on this for a while now, and if you make fun of me or make a smart ass comment about it, I will ban you from the store. Like with a picture on the wall and everything.”

Peter’s staring at the opened up folder you plopped in front of him on the register counter. He snorts, eyes taking in the pictures of your ‘suspects’ along with the lengthy notes you have paper clipped to them. Your ‘extra-ness’ was something he genuinely adored.

“Wait, Flash Thompson? Really? You think he’s Spider-Man?” he asks after coming across the sheet, appalled.

“Oh totally, he’s like my number one guess honestly. I mean, he’s fit, he’s tall, and he has an obsession with the guy even more than I do. That seems to me like the perfect way to get people off his trail; pretending to be Spidey’s number one fan. Well I see straight through that bullshit,” you say matter of factly.

Peter looks at you silently for a moment, clearly amused, before shaking his head. “Well, looks like you have your work cut out for you detective.”

“Look, you can tease me all you want, but one day I’m going to figure out who he is and when I do, I won’t even tell you.”

He raises a brow at you, playfully. “Oh yeah? And how do you know I don’t already know?”

“Pfft, oh please Parker. You wish,” you say with a roll of your eyes, turning around to go tend to the work that had to be done.

Peter watches you disappear into the back room with a small, affectionate smile before looking back down at the file.

His picture isn’t in it.

The first time you hang outside of work is at Peter’s suggestion, when he enters the shop one day and slides two tickets over the counter to you.

“So I know you’re busy saving the world one bouquet at a time, but they’re having a special screening at the theatre around the block and they’re playing ‘Little Shop of Horrors’,” he says, leaning on the register counter, brows wiggling as a small smirk places itself on his lips.

“Are you assuming that I like ‘Little Shop of Horrors’ because I own a flower shop?”

He looks at you with a squint, silently daring you to deny it, but the smirk is still intact because he knows that he is, indeed, absolutely right.

You head to the movies after you close the shop early and once you get there you’re both a little too excited about being the only ones at the showing because that means you get to sing along with the songs at the top of your lungs.

You have the best time shouting the lyrics together, especially when it comes to ‘Suddenly Seymour’, thanks to Peter’s dramatic hand gestures towards you. It’s all perfect until his hand bumps into yours when you reach for the popcorn at the same time.

Your stomach does a stupid little flip and you’re now hyper aware of your closeness and the way he turns to look at you throughout the movie.

Oh no….

You like Peter Parker.

You are so screwed.

Peter’s crush on Gwen is still prominent, him coming to you with updates and questions due to your new ‘best friend’ status.

You’re not even sure when it happens but you end up going over to Peter’s house most nights where May makes you her famous lasagna and shows you baby pictures of Peter despite his protest. You also hangout at the park where you watch him skate and the local record shop and the movies and eventually he even gifts you a friendship bracelet when you joke about getting matching ones due to how attached at the hip you two have become.

You’ve never had a friend like this and you’re grateful that it’s with Peter.

But of course, talking about crushes comes with the package, and Peter spills his feelings to you about lovely lovely Gwen Stacy.

And you’re supportive, of course, because at the end of the day you know that Gwen is the best possible person for Peter.

Having Gwen by his side would make him feel like a million bucks.

You on the other hand barely even had a dollar to spare on most days.

You’ll never be anything more than the owner of the little flower shop at Queens that hangs by a thread every single day.

Yet, you can feel it fester inside of you, the pain and envy that came with knowing that Peter would never be yours the way you wished he would be.

Truth was, you loved him, and you were happy to have him in your life any way you could.

But you’d be lying if you said you didn’t wish you were the Gwen Stacy in his life.

“You wouldn’t want to go back?” Peter asks one day, sitting on your work station table, peering over you as you worked on a floral arrangement for a wedding.

“Hmm..I mean, yeah, I guess. But that’s never going to happen.”

“Why not?” he asks, and you look up at him, noticing how focused he is on you and your work.

“Because it’s not like I have anyone else to run this shop. Come on, you know that.”

“Yeah, but..I just think that you really want to go back, and I’m sure there’s a way to do that while also having enough time to run the shop without over exerting yourself.”

You don’t know why, but his response irritates you the slightest bit, so you roll your eyes and look at him with a frown.

“Oh really, is there? Do enlighten me with this fabulous solution of yours, Pete. Given that you know everything, of course.”

You see a flicker of annoyance in his own eyes, and though part of you really wants to wave the white flag before anything begins to escalate, a larger part of you craves to push his buttons some more.

The same part that internally yells at him for never realizing how much it hurts to hear him talk about Gwen.

“Funny. I’m just trying to help you.”

“Even funnier because I don’t remember asking for your help. Ha. Guess we’re starring in a comedy today.”

“You do understand that you have your own life right? That you should do something with it? You know, like something you actually want to do?”

His tone is getting lower and the usual light in his eyes has completely disappeared, but this does nothing to stop you from continuing on.

“I’m sorry, are you seriously lecturing me right now? Oh hey dad, I’m so glad you came back after 10 years. That cigarette break sure took forever.”

“Can you not make a joke out of something for once?”

“No, because this is a joke. A huge one. The fact that you think you know what I want is hilarious to me, because clearly you’re the most ignorant one here.”

“What? Where is this even coming from?”

“It’s coming from the fact that you don’t know a damn thing about me, Peter. And-and I’m getting really tired of you acting like you do. You have no idea what I want. Trust me.”

The argument escalates, and though it hurts to speak to Peter the way you did, your unrequited feelings hurt you way more. It ends with him storming out, the jingle of the bell above the door taunting you as he slips out.

You feel a mixture of anger and sadness and you wish you could scream in frustration, but a man immediately comes in through the door right after, asking for roses for his anniversary dinner.

It’s closing time when the guilt starts to eat at you. You’re so used to having Peter around most nights when you close, especially on Saturday’s when the streets are the busiest.

You’re counting the register when you hear the bell over the door ring, making you to realize that you forgot to lock it.

When you look up, you realize there’s a man with a hood in front of you, and before you can react, he lifts up a pistol and directs it towards you.

“Give me the money or I’ll shoot.”

You feel like everything’s moving in slow motion, a ringing beginning to sound off in your ears, suffocatingly terrified.

You follow the instructions given, handing him all the cash in your register, but despite this, the man doesn’t flee.

“Please. I gave you the money, now please just-“

“Shut the fuck up! I‘ll leave when I want to leave. Now walk over here and get on your knees.”

You're a trembling mess but you do as you're told, tears sliding down your cheeks despite trying your best to keep your composure.

Just as your knees hit the floor, you hear the jingle of the door once more and the man is suddenly pulled away from you.

With wide eyes you realize Spider-Man has webbed the man from behind, pulling him away from you before tossing him out the door. You watch through the window as he quickly shoots webs at his ankles and wrists, immobilizing him, and can hear the man scream before Spider-Man webs his mouth closed, the screams now muffled.

After ensuring the man was dealt with and not running away anytime soon, Spider-Man walks back in, standing awkwardly in the middle of your shop.

“Are you ok ma’m?” he asks, and your eyes are wide, staring at him with a dropped jaw, only managing a little nod.

“You..you used my front door?” you say after a moment, because you’re still in shock and that’s the first thing you could think of to say.

He looks behind him at the door, the muffled screams of the thief still playing in the background from the outside. “Well yeah. You’re a small business, right? I don’t know if you have insurance that can cover the damages of a shattered door,” he responds simply, as if all super heroes thought about the capabilities of a small shop before jumping into action.

“I..I don’t have insurance,”

“You see? That would have really sucked then if I just crashed in.”

The entire situation has you completely dazed. Not only were you almost robbed, but Spider-Man came to your rescue and is standing right in front of you.

You’re pretty sure you’re gonna pass out.

“Hey, it’s ok. You’re safe, I promise. The cops should be on the way and they’ll get this asshole off the streets and you’ll have nothing to worry about. I’m sorry this happened to you,” he states, keeping his distance from you.

As much as Peter is trying his hardest to keep his cool for the sake of his identity, all he really wants to do is wrap his arms around you and apologize.

Because, if it wasn’t for him storming out, he would have kept you company during closing like he did most nights, and that dick head most likely wouldn’t have stepped into the store.

He’s just thankful he had enough mind to pass by the shop as he was doing his rounds around the city.

Even more thankful that he got there in time.

He leaves after making sure you’re okay and trying to keep you from hyper ventalating (you’re starstruck, of course, and Peter has to use all of his self restraint not to laugh or call you cute because god you’re so adorable when your face flushes and your eyes look at him like he’s the greatest person to ever walk the earth).

His mind starts to wonder if you’d still look at him that way if you found out he was actually Spider-Man.

Then he thinks about the way you looked at him when he was just plain old Peter, and he feels his heart speed up when he realizes that it’s not that different actually…

And that’s when he it finally clicks for him.

“You have no idea what I want. Trust me.”

….

How can he be so stupid??

Seriously, a scientific genius that can figure out a cure for lizard people and he couldn’t realize that you liked him?

He’s embarrassed and irritated with himself to say the least.

Especially given all the times he would talk to you about Gwen.

He’s on his way home, swinging, and he actually groans at the thought.

He’s totally kicking himself right now.

Thinking about it now, Peter realizes that, despite the times he would talk to you about her, he didn’t ever seriously think about Gwen that way after he met you.

Every day his crush on Gwen got less serious. He wouldn’t ask her to hang out anymore. He always much rather preferred spending time with you.

He guesses he was too distracted to realize that he was starting to feel the way he felt for Gwen, for you.

‘Good job Parker. Now you totally messed this up for the both of us.’

The next day, Peter comes bursting into your shop, apology at the ready as he fires out every word that’s on his mind.

“I’m sorry. You’re right, I don’t know what you want and I shouldn’t act like I do. I didn’t mean to make you upset, I just care for you so much and you’ve become someone so important to me and all I want is for you to be happy. You deserve to be inexplicably happy and if the flower shop makes you happy, then do it. But if school makes you happy, then I can help you with that. I thought about it and you can take classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays on my off days, and I can totally cover your shift and run the shop and trust me, I’ve watched you enough so I know I can do it, and if anything I can watch you some more and I can tutor you if you need help in math cause I know that’s not your strong suit cause you told me but you’re so smart and you can do it and you can totally graduate and I’ll help you and you can come over for dinner every night if you’re too exhausted to cook and-are you crying?”

Peter’s staring at you in horror as tears flow freely down your cheeks. He’s starting to think he messed up again but you begin to shake your head as a smile breaks out on your face and he sees in your eyes that you’re looking at him in that way and he feels a fluttering in his chest.

“It’s just that….you’re absolutely amazing Peter, and I’m so thankful that you’re in my life. Thank you for that, really. And I’m sorry, too. I wasn’t actually mad at you because of what you said, I know you’re just trying to help. I’m just stupid and frustrated and I took that out on you. But…just…thank you for being so…” and you let out a light, watery laugh and shrug because the words aren’t enough.

And he understands, completely, because words could never properly explain how much he loves you.

“Oh, and I’m actually not just here to loiter today. I would like to buy some flowers,” he states proudly.

At this, your eyes widen.“Really? For who?”

“You remember the first time I came in here? You said that the next time I buy flowers it would be for my special someone?”

“Y-yeah,” you say, the slight confusion and wariness evident in your tone.

“Well, today’s the day.”

Your stomach drops at this but you make sure your face shows no sign of it. You love Peter and you’re beyond happy for him that he’s finally taking that step with Gwen. So when he requests you to make a bouquet that’s full of your personal favorites, you do so with a smile.

You hand them to him and Peter thanks you with a grateful smile and you watch the door jingle close as he walks out, taking a small shaky breath in before letting it out.

Acceptance.

…..

….

…

..

A few seconds later, you see Peter make his way back to the store and you watch him with furrowed brows as he enters and approaches you at the counter once again.

He hands you the flowers silently and your eyes flicker back and forth to them and him, genuinely confused.

“W-what happened? Is there something wrong with them?” you ask, concern laced in your tone.

“No, they’re perfect. It’s just that they’re for you.”

You look at him silently for a moment, stunned.

“W-what…?” and it finally hits you.

When he sees the realization in your eyes, he smiles adoringly at you, warm eyes softening.

“I’m sorry I didn’t realize it sooner. I don’t know if you noticed, but i’m not as sharp as I seem. I get really distracted and miss out on what’s in front of me, even when it’s undeniably perfect. But, I really, really like you and I promise, my feelings for you are genuine. It just took me a bit to realize what they were, but..I would love it if you could be my special someone.”

You watch him in complete disbelief.

Did Peter just confess his feelings for you?

“I…” your mouth keeps opening and closing and Peter’s sure you’re short circuiting.

“Hey, it’s ok, I get it. This is sudden and unexpected and I understand completely. I just wanted to let you know before I went off on patrol right now. But if you find yourself free with nothing to do tonight, send me a text and I’ll swing by because I would really like to take you out on a date. Oh, and leave your window open, I’ll just go in through there if that’s ok.”

Your eyes are as wide as saucers, a mixture of giddyness and confusion and every other emotion known to man due to everything that Peter was saying.

You noticed however that some of the things he was saying didn’t exactly make any sense…

“Patrol? W-what? And my..my window? Peter, I live on the 12th floor.”

“It’s okay, I’ve climbed higher,” he states as he retreats back to the door, opening it but turning back to you before heading out.

“Oh, and one more thing?”

He stretches his arm out, a web shooting out as it attaches to the folder you always had near your register.

He pulls the folder towards him and grabs it quickly before any papers fly out.

“I’m a little offended that you didn’t put me on your list of suspects,” he says with a wink, and just like that he’s out the door.

There’s no words to describe how shocked you are. You can’t even move let alone breathe.

Till finally you start to regain feeling in your body again and you’re pretty sure he can still hear you as he’s walking down the block.

“NO FUCKING WAY!!”

He does, in fact, hear you, and he’s chuckling to himself as he turns a corner to switch into his spidey suit.

He can’t wait for tonight.

[hellomynamiseglaf]

🌰Chestnuts and Warm Milk🍂

My List of ~Favorites~ for Interactive Fiction and Visual Novels

(This is a work in progress so please bear with me)

Interactive Fiction:

The Wayhaven Chronicles (WIP Series in Development) - @seraphinitegames  (Look,,, I’m just... obsessed.. I can’t stop thinking abt it,,, and I'm..... sometimes, I read and I think I feel like I know what love is.)

Mind Blind (WIP) - @mindblindbard (I just,, UGH it’s so good. I can't even say that much because my feelings about it are so potent that everytime I see an update I try to tell myself to leave it alone to play larger portions of updates as a treat and everytime my willpower FAILS and I replay the demo like twice in a row)

Demon: Recollect ; Forsaken (WIP) - both by @bathalafiction (whew...WHEW!!! Are you kidding me?? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? Look. I was attached to Demon: Recollect. I loved it. And then I played the Forsaken WIP and now I can't get over my absolutely BOMB character design for my player persona. Also it's kind of fun being considered a jerk in the game, because it opens up a lot of different options that I usually feel bad about taking)

Shadow Society - @carawenfiction (the concept is so interesting,, I dream of more. Also Quaiel...baby...)

The Soul Stone War - @intimidatingpuffinstudios (also whew!! I really enjoyed it and the characters all picture themselves really vividly in my mind for some reason.)

Greenwarden (WIP) - @fiddles-ifs (reading this is like thick fog.. but in a good way? I don't know how to describe it without pictures but this IF smells like fog over wet grass)

Divine Intervention (WIP) - @divineinterventiongame (the concept?? UGH SO GOOD. For some reason it's always the first game I click to check for updates)

Golden (WIP) - @milaswriting (😈😈😈😈)

Blood/line (WIP) - @bloodlineoffical (simply put,,, LARRY)

Supernatural in New York ; The Bastard of Camelot (both WIPs) - @llamagirl28  (UGH Both of these are so good in their own ways but equally as exciting to see updates for. I haven't consolidated my feelings much further than "my MC for SiNY is so cute" and "Mordred is a child" but they're all generally positive.)

Ace of Spades (WIP) - @steph-writing (I keep thinking about,,, con........)

Nevermoore (WIP) - @asteristories (AHHHHH.... let me say it again for those in the back: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH)

Son of Satan: The Mortal Coil (WIP) - @sosthemortalcoil (YES.)

Shepherds of Haven (WIP) - @shepherds-of-haven (yes. I just have to sigh because it's very good and I like saying those funny little words of power. But also outside of the game I can only picture this game as a great, grey border collie)

Attollo (WIP) - @attollo (Also a very interesting concept, whoo... I almost forgot how immersive it was untill I played the demo again and was reminded of how 'into it' I was straight off the bat. Also the seperate, short little piece on the blog with Sysba was also really good and I had a dream about it the other day)

Into the Shadows (WIP) - @wynnakang​ (whooo.... I'm sighing again, but louder. I press restart and play the demo again)

A Comedy of Manors (WIP) - @sviyaginthegreat (I kept replaying options that I hadn't chosen before because I wanted there to be more lmao)

Fallen Hero: Rebirth - @fallen-hero (I think there's a sequel coming up? I haven't stopped thinking about this storyline since I finished it omg... the.. the details are really good and I've become ridiculously attached to my tragic villain? Character... she IS the standard for my reusable IF persona, or at least one of my most prominent ones ;-D )

Samurai of Hyuga (WIP series) - (I'm pretty sure multiplechoicestudios.com is the development blog for this game, or at least what I've been checking for updates..... this is a series with four book currently out.... and I've been playing through book 4 at slower than a snail's pace in a desperate attempt to prolong my experience. I really didn't think I was going to like it as much as I did but I got a little too into it and now I'm horribly attached to all the characters)

The Porthecrawl Witness(WIP) - @porthecrawl-witness (I'm pretty sure this is a WIP?? But ugh. SCREEEEEE- it's so good. It's SO GOOD. I really want to punch Talbot in the face. And Asher, if for a different reason. And sort of Staci just to try. Quinn is just a cutie I could never hurt him like that. Ugh but they're all so good and I forgot that I was reading a WIP untill it suddenly was over..... I'mfeeling really aggressive rn as I'm writing this, so please just note that the punch comment is meant as a statement on how interesting the concept and immersiveness of the characters and story is)

Forgotten Names (WIP) - by Alexandra_Zorila on the CoG Forum (turn the volume up. AHHHHHHHHHH!!! Look, look. It's..... delicious. It's SO interesting and I obsessively have a tab open on my computer to check for updates)

OFNA: Birds of a Feather (WIP) - @ofna (the vibes are so grey and smoky but the fog is definitely from a party smoke machine and the room is only dark because the walls are taped with those huge sheets of black construction paper that teachers use to cover their bulletin boards with... the game definitely falls in the 'dark and mysterious' genre but something just strikes me as really funny when I play it. Anyway it's good and it's in a lot if recommended lists for a reason. Also I'm very attached to my American Goldfinch)

More Things in Heaven and Earth (WIP) - @morethingsgame (in the same way that it's fun to play Guenevere in the Guenevere game or Mordred in The Bastard of Camelot, playing Ophelia in the sort-of Hamlet story is really fun. If anyone has read the Missing collection- which I absolutely love- by Margaret Peterson Haddix, this gives me similar vibes for some reason. Anyway, I really want to give Hamlet a hug and make him a flower crown or something)

A Tale of Crowns (WIP) - @ataleofcrowns (It's kind of not even funny how much I love this game... It's hard to even describe why I like it, just that it's so well rounded in terms of the story, characters, dialogue, and relationships. It's such an interesting plotline and it's pretty immersive. Also the first time I read the demo, there was an update as I was reading and the high that sent me on has very rarely been matched. Also Dara running to save my Crown in the tunnel?? 🤚😩🤭💓 ugh. UGH!! That's good food for my fool heart)

Scout: An Apocalypse Story (WIP)- @anya-dev (I'm usually not that into apocalypse themes/plots but I really enjoyed this game, and the plot was very good and intruiging... it really pulled me in and I like my character in the story a lot. I don't know why but it tastes like chikuwa, atsuage, and this specific type of carmelized onions that my mom makes sometimes)

Nothing left to burn (WIP)- @clowdee-works (......ouch. I *knew* what was going to happen and I STILL became attached to Drew)

Smoke and Velvet - @roast-ifs (It's good. And I am VEDY much into my character design. Also the story is really interesting, and I enjoy the setting a lot somehow)

Speaker (WIP)- @speakergame (very fun to play, and each update gets me more interested in the aspects of the plot. I also really like the little descriptions of what the characters think of the player)

The Nameless (WIP)- @parkerlyn (interesting plot, I like the characters a lot, and The aesthetics of this world are so interesting. Definitely had a good time visualizing what everything looked like)

Fields of Asphodel (WIP) - @asphodelgame (I think it's really cute so far!!! I like mythology in general, and the persephone/hades dynamic is *mwah!*... I like the way the story progresses in the beginning, and I think it works well in drawing the reader into the world. I also very much enjoy petting large dogs.)

...there are so much more.. and I have followed so many blogs.........

I'm not sure why I can't find it rn but there's this one WIP game that I really like where the MC buys a manor for like dollar and moves to go live there with her best friend and shenanigans ensue as they try to settle in and fix up the estate

Harbringer (WIP) - @harbringercog (....are you KIDDING me?? I was fully planning on just enjoying the demo and keeping a mental note to update the list sometime later,,, but this game... THIS GAME really made me fold. It's very immersive and regardless of how nervous the author claims to be after releasing the demo, it's of my humble opinion that those nerves can be calmed. It's very good. I was planning on procrastinating and reading a little bit and then going back to this essay I need to write, but somehow I got pulled in and ended up reading through the whole demo and it's apparent that I honestly had no chance of getting through this without becoming invested in the plot.... just... so good.. I'm very excited to see how this will progress)

Visual Novels:

Andromeda 6 (WIP) - @andromeda-six​  (I repeat: Obsessed, I come back every few months to see an update and I fall deeper into the hole every time...)

To the Edge of the Sky (WIP,, probably) - by Ajané (??) on Steam (I think, it’s been a while)

Next on my list to check out: Perfumare by pdrrook

Does.... does The Arcana game by Nix Hydra count as VN?? If so, then yes.

Similarly, the FictIF games are all entertaining, although Last Legacy and Heir to Love and Lies are my favorites rn (and.....unfinished....)

I also don't know if this counts, because I kind of consider Otome games to be their own genre, but on the Love 365: find your story by Voltage Inc. There are a bunch of fun stories, my favorite of which are: the Shinichi Kagari route on After School Affairs and the Saejima and Keiichiro routes on Bad Boys do it Better

..To be continued...

[cdmagic1408]

(click for better quality!! DO NOT STEAL!!)

Whew! I managed to draw this in spare time between my busy college classes and right before boarding the plane to LA 😅 ⬆️

But anyway…

✨ Happy 2nd Anniversary Onward!!! ✨

Chantar's Talon! What can I say that I haven't already said?

I guess I'll start with who would've thought I'd still be attached to this movie two years later?!

Yet here I am and I am not sorry at all 😎

I love Ian and Barley so much, their brotherhood is beautiful on so many levels, and their world is absolutely awesome! 😍

Having said that, I think it's pretty safe to say that Onward has become my absolute favorite animated movie of all time, and my ultimate comfort film!

But it's also so much more than that...

Onward is inspiring, relatable, funny, and magical. But let me emphasize on why it is ✨ inspiring ✨...

I've always been shy, introverted, and afraid to put myself out there to people and to share what I like with them. But Ian's journey to be bold has inspired me to be more bold too! ✊

First by writing and publishing a 33-chapter fanfic continuation of his and Barley's story from where it left off, then creating this blog and sharing it with you guys, and finally having the guts and confidence to advertise this story across my college campus!

And having done all of that, I feel great! 😄

I love being here, I love this fandom, and I love you Quest Masters! I love coming here everyday and getting to share my love and my thoughts on this film with all of you!

I've loved movies and shows on a die-hard level before but this is really the first fandom I've ever truly been a part of

I became an active member of the Onward fandom just about six months ago but before that I was sorta incognito, writing IYTM undercover hoping to prove myself and share something great and authentic with you all ✍️

But now I am happy and proud to be out here, to support you guys, to have done my part, and to continue doing my part to help keep this film's legacy alive because I think it is super important

Not only to help it receive the same amount of credit as other beloved Pixar films do, but also because I feel represented by this film 🎖

I haven't really said this yet but sometimes I turn to Onward because certain days in college, I just miss my family: my mom and my sister, my Laurel and my Barley.

I miss having all three of us together in the same house, and when my sister and I went to school together. And sometimes I wish I could go back and relive those days again... 😔

But I feel so lucky to spend Onward's anniversary week with them both in LA this week! A family reunion! And I can't wait to spend it with all of you today! 😃

I guess to wrap things up, over my winter break a couple months ago I managed to find my movie ticket from when I saw Onward for the first time in theaters back on March 9th, 2020! 🎞 🤩

I'm so glad I still have it as it marked the beginning of something truly great! But I also see it as a memory of how things were before COVID hit. I genuinely don't know when things will go back to normal (that is Pixar movies going back to theaters...) but I'm grateful I have this movie to bring me a smile on my face everyday 😊

So thank you all for loving Onward as much as I do and for believing in it. Because I still believe in it and I hope to keep believing in it for years to come ✨

[atopearth]

Collar X Malice: Unlimited Part 7 - Adonis Route

Honestly, I find the way Ichika joined Zero's side to be pretty iffy even back then in the original game, so I kinda hoped something like Kazuki dying would have changed here but I guess not.. I feel sorry for Kazuki that they reconciled but she still ended up joining Adonis alongside Akito, it must be a pretty big shock having to deal with that. (EDIT: guess he is gone..) Ichika being at the top and training people in marksmanship and stuff is very interesting lol. She looks all right with short hair but yeah, I agree with Zero, I liked the long hair more. Anyway, Zero wants her to find out if there's a traitor amongst them before the next X-Day (since the one 2 years ago failed) in 30 days. Anyway, it seems like you go through each of the Adonis' executors' stories so that's interesting. I'm just going to go from the ones I least like to the ones I like the most haha, and then leave Mikuni for last I guess. Well, Hana's story first then~

Kobayashi Hana

I guess Hana is as bright as ever. I quite enjoy seeing her try and dress Ichika up and make her cuter lol. On the other hand, seeing her mercilessly cut through that panda cake was pretty hilarious. One thing I enjoyed insight into was hearing that Hana has been avoiding going to Isshiki's concerts to avoid causing any trouble to them with the police just in case they come to crash it because of her or something. Honestly, I was pretty impressed. Like, she's always been pretty selfish, and she's always prioritised her love for Isshiki above everything, but to see that she could stop herself to protect him was nice in its own way. Even though she's a pretty ruthless killer, and even though she's obsessed with Isshiki, I guess she does think things through a bit so that Isshiki won't ever have to suffer because of her. Hmm Ichika seemed to reminisce about Kazuki, does that mean he died? Anyway, these investigations are short? Are they really just segments of story for Ichika to become friends with each person? Lol. I mean, Ichika literally did nothing but talk about random stuff with Hana lol. I actually find it rather endearing that Hana and Ichika can fight so openly about their feelings and understand that they actually do want the best for each other, it's kinda nice how they became good friends under such circumstances.

Soda Manabu

Honestly, I kinda wish we could just pick one character and continue until the investigation completes because it's sooo annoying having to press on each one like 7 times just to get a couple of lines of story each time Zzz. Anyway, gotta admit Ichika is pretty judgmental towards Soda, and actively tries to "fix" him and thinks what he does is "wrong", which is pretty annoying tbh. Just because she doesn't understand games, she thinks it's useless to Adonis, and then judges him for his eating habits? Lol. Anyway, at least she tried playing his game though lol, and even got lessons from him haha. I see, I can understand why Ichika would go to Zero for "revenge" but not sure about the "sadness" thing if that's what she's going for tbh. Losing Yanagi, Enomoto, Shiraishi, Okazaki and Kazuki is a big hit and I can understand it shattering her world, but going to Adonis is basically breeding everything that killed everyone important to her. Anyway, Sasazuka's pained voice telling Ichika not to go to Adonis really hurt. I'm sure he's really hurting over the fact he didn't notice the weapons that ended up killing everyone, alongside survivor's guilt of being the only one who survived out of the group, and then now not even being able to stop Ichika from going over to the other side.. It's painful to see. Anyway, lmao, Soda is probably a tamer little brother than Kazuki. His words are harsh but you can tell he only talks like that to protect himself, so any time he swears, I don't bother taking him seriously, he's a hurt little kid. It's cute how Ichika mixed his hated eggplants into the gratin and he didn't even notice, but he ate the whole thing happily🤣 He's so adorable lmao, especially when his face went red and he told her he'd eat her stuff again (even though she shouldn't hear it), and then he ran off🤣

It seems like Soda regrets his actions much more than I initially thought. He was able to get revenge, but now he's even more scared of death because of what he had done, and now he's just in this never-ending cycle of fear, needing to have Zero's power to protect himself, doing his bidding so that he won't die, but at the same time being so scared of his life that the only time he probably feels "safe" is when he plays his games. I love how happy he was when Ichika gave him a SS tier rare item and he put it on, locked it and kept it in a special box🤣 That's so cuteee. Definitely enjoyed Soda's mini part more than I thought hahaha, he's such a cute little kid, which makes it kinda sad lol. Soda blowing up and getting mad at Ichika for playing solo and saying she didn't need connections when she made him realise he wanted to start building connections because of her was really...heartwarming. Soda gave up on people and a lot of things thinking that he could never have them because that's how it was considering how people are, but he changed his mind after Ichika so insistently barged into his life, and now to say that it's practically useless would be extremely hurtful to him. I was really impressed with Soda, and I'm happy that he even told Ichika that she can rely on him more, he's such a sweet boy🥲

Uno Suzune

Lmaooo poor Shion, the woes of a big brother. I found it hilarious how Suzune would give him the green peas she doesn't like even though Shion hates them too, definitely something siblings would do🥲 I superrrr agree with Suzune about handwriting diaries instead of writing a blog! I mean, I have both obviously, but I definitely have different feelings when I read my blog and when I read my writing in my diary. Through my blog, I can easily read my exact thoughts and get to the gist of what I'm talking about, but with my diary, I can see stuff like when I started getting tired of writing, when I felt like changing my pen, and a lot of other feelings that can't be seen or portrayed properly in a typed blog, and yes, the memories of me writing all this usually comes back better when I've written it, mainly because I either say it in the entry or because I can actually remember sitting there and putting time into writing about my life/day.

Guess Suzune's pretty yandere for her brother if any kind of possible romantic interest from Ichika gets her other self to come out and threaten her about it lol. Anyway, it's cute how she’s starting to kinda think of Ichika as a big sister. Suzune willingly taking Ichika to Shion and calling Ichika Chi-chan is probably the biggest improvement you can get considering she could stab you as the worst case hahha. Well, Suzune was definitely cuter than I thought and seeing her so vulnerable, shy but wanting to protect Shion and getting out of her shell for him was sweet. Are there endings for each executor? Well, anyway, Suzune saying she would be sad if anything happened to Ichika was really sweet.

Sugawara Rika

Lmao, I forgot Sugawara is obsessed with Zero, this is going to be fun I guess. It's kinda funny that getting a 50,000 yen strawberry entices her lol, I'm surprised Zero approved it as an expense, like dang, can I have one too, I'm curious lol. Lmao when Sugawara wanted to keep the strawberries as a memento instead of eating it😂 She should have been convinced when Ichika said it'll become a part of her hahahah. LOL when Sugawara started lecturing Ichika about dressing better in front of Zero, and then tried to get her makeup to make her look better, but then Ichika runs away😂

Okay, I loved the girls dress up night with Hana, Ichika and Sugawara. It was so funny how they started arguing about what Ichika should wear and then became fast enough friends to recommend each other stuff and then wear it for fun. I loveee that they had a CG for their new outfits because they're all so pretty, I love them! I think Hana's is my favourite because it's so simple but cute in a different way from her usual. I guess it's kinda cute how in Hana's investigation, Hana focuses on Ichika's clothing fashion, but Sugawara takes it further or I guess mainly focuses on skincare, makeup and haircare haha. I guess it's nice that Sugawara is definitely much more open about standing up for herself and other women when it comes to men who try to objectify them or think of them as "lesser". She's become stronger. I think it's kinda sad to see that amongst all the other happy mini endings with the other executors, Rika's one with Ichika is actually pretty sad because it was through them bonding that Rika noticed Ichika's true intentions of revenge, and that's why they can never truly see eye-to-eye and be friends.

Ogata Tomoki

I guess I didn't expect Ogata to be the type to go to batting cages, but I even more didn't expect him to reserve sweets to make sure he can get them hahaha! It's nice that he enjoys wagashi though, I definitely should have tried it when I went to Japan, but I completely forgot😭 Aww, Ogata had such a sweet daughter! Whenever his wife wasn't looking, she would eat his hated tomatoes for him! Such a kind kid😭 I've never heard of monaka before, so I googled it and they look nice!! Kinda like an ice cream sandwich but not with ice cream and has red bean paste and other stuff inside I guess? I would totally eat it. Lmaoo at Ichika's impression of the typical salaryman😂😂 It's true though, I can't imagine Ogata going home to watch comedy shows with a beer in his hand🤣 Aww it was so cute how Ogata did an impersonation of a character in a drama because he got so used to doing it for his daughter. But lmao at Ichika though, telling him what he can improve on since Adonis might have end of the year parties he could use it for, imagine a bunch of terrorists partying for something so normal like the end of the year hahah😂😂

It's actually really sad how Ogata feels like he can't be a father anymore because he knows that he prioritises his current ideals and dreams more than his daughter. And I guess considering how long they've been separated and how much he has changed, it would probably feel awkward to try and be a normal father, but I guess at least through Ichika's encouragement, he's willing to try and reply to his daughter's letter of wanting to meet him. I think the reason why I've always liked Ogata is because he doesn't regret his actions. Like, he knows that he's killed people and that's why he doesn't want to see his family and get them involved with what he's doing right now, because he knows the gravity of his actions. But at the same time, his hatred for Fujii, the police and the whole mistaken arrest that led to such injustice for him and changed his whole perspective on life is something he can't let go of, and that's why it led him to Adonis and to fulfill his "new" ideals. He knows it's a path that will not necessarily have a "good ending" but he's willing to sacrifice everything for it, and I think that's what makes me attracted to his character. Anyway, LMAO at how insistent Ichika was on seeing young Ogata with a buzzcut playing baseball, absolutely hilarious when she was ready to tie him up with a rope and search his room😂😂 It's pretty sad to see that Ogata wanted to be like Isshiki and save people with his justice without faltering in this cruel world but he just wasn't able to do it because hatred was what fuelled him to move forward and not forgiveness or hope. But I'm glad he encouraged Ichika to listen to Isshiki's song and hear Kazuki's guitar, because seeing Ichika show her emotions again, even if just a little bit was nice...

Uno Shion

Aww, it's cute how much Shion cares about Suzune, but also so cute how he's embarrassed to say he likes chocolate🤣 It's nice that he's more cooperative than Suzune I guess hahaha. I never expected Shion to like to paint though, that's interesting. Anyway, it's pretty sad to think that the "outside world" was much more unforgiving to the Uno siblings, and that it was only after they joined this terrorist organisation did they get to feel safe and secure that they have shelter and food without people going crazy on them. In that sense, it's understandable how much more comfortable Adonis would be for them. Aww Shion and Suzune getting excited over a chocolate cake is so adorable. Them saving up to buy a home for themselves is so heartwarming, it makes me really want to cheer for them. I'm dying from how cute they are trying to feed Ichika the chocolate cake too because they really like her and think she's really kind like their mother was before. Shion buying a cheese tart for both Ichika and Suzune was sweet, she's like a part of his thought process when buying stuff for his sister hahaha. Lol when he just shoved it into her mouth instead of giving it to her like a normal person🤣 Lmaoo when Shion drew a portrait of Ichika stuffing herself with cheese tart🤣 To think that Shion was so serious about drawing that he's actually thinking about a future with it after the X-Day stuff..it’s so endearing.

Sera Akito

It must be difficult for both Akito and Ichika to talk to each other. Just seeing each other's faces would make them remember the past and compare it to the present, making their whole encounter just...painful to watch. It's so like Akito to hide that he dislikes shiitake mushrooms so that it wouldn't inconvenience Ichika and make her remove it from the cooking menu. Lmaooo at Akito being so scared of bugs, enough that Ichika has to call cockroaches dark fairies to make him feel more at ease🤣 I'm sure Akito must be hurting too, but his consideration for Ichika above himself really makes my heart feel so warm. Awww, my heart swooned when Akito said his ideal type was Ichika! If only there was an Akito route~ Anyway, I didn't expect Akito and Soda to really interact but lmaoo at Soda having spent millions of yen on in-game stuff, Soda is right though, gacha rates are cruel😭😭 Aww, it was so cute how honest Soda was about wanting to have defeated the boss with Akito instead of dumping him and killing it himself, since what Soda values is playing together with other people. So, Kazuki was stabbed by a guy who was influenced by Adonis into taking revenge against his bullies or something, and I guess Kazuki was killed when he tried to step in? Honestly, I feel terrible for Akito. He was already feeling doubts and guilt over getting revenge for his sister, but after experiencing Kazuki's death, he must hate his choice for joining Adonis even more than before. It honestly broke my heart to see Akito break down like that not knowing how he could atone for his sins in causing Kazuki's death. His heartwrenching screams really cut me and made me tear up from all the pain Akito must have been bottling up all this time. Akito will always be my favourite side character, I think his pain, his feelings and his emotions were portrayed so well.

Sanjo Keisuke

Aww, Sanjo's favourite food being ramen is very him, kinda hahaha. I can't imagine a 7kg bowl of ramen and having to finish that in 30 minutes😱 On the other hand, Sanjo being into arcades is kinda unexpected, lmaooo at Ichika thinking he would play the crane games😂 I didn't think about the fact that Ichika is a former cop just like him now, I wonder how he feels about that or whether he even cares😅 Lmao at Sanjo seriously answering Ichika what his type of woman is and then even describing the body shape with sound effects😂 I can't believe Ichika just tickled Sanjo and made him laugh like crazy, I would have liked to see that😆😆 I think it would have been so nice if Ogata was Sanjo's boss, I feel like their values and ideals of justice back in the day would have matched well since Sanjo probably desired something "pure" back in the day and hoped to be a part of an organisation that helped people, and Ogata was always helping people already, so they would have worked well together. It's just sad that they both got betrayed by their ideals of what the police should have been to them and others.

 The idea that you can't feel any fear because you don't value your life is a pretty interesting and saddening thought. Maybe because I get that feeling sometimes. I agree with Sanjo, Zero definitely doesn't truly care about those ideals of saving the weak that he keeps spouting, he's not like Mikuni, and that's also imo the reason why Zero believes that he and Mikuni will never truly understand each other. Ichika and Sanjo eating ramen together is so cute lol.

Mikuni Rei

Lmao at Zero calling Mikuni an old man for liking fish, disliking carbonated drinks and other junk food because they're not nutritional hahaha. Otherwise, nothing much to say tbh, Mikuni has always been a rather bland character to me? I like him, but at the same time I don't because even though it's interesting to see that he actually has "noble" goals compared to Zero, the fact is that Mikuni as he himself said has been told that he's a "saviour" of sorts, and I think that really exemplifies the type of person Mikuni is. Someone who believes that he can and wants to "save" people in his own way as if he is someone above them all, but at the same time, he is very apparently flawed exactly because he is like that. He's not someone who truly understands the people "below" him and he also doesn't seem to perceive that as something that can be helped, and that's why even though his goals are "noble", he's not really noble at all. But it doesn't really change the fact that Mikuni is kind in his own way though. Mikuni eating shrimp crackers is so cute😂

Saeki Yuzuru

To be honest, I've always liked the chill policeman Saeki, and I personally think Zero likes that version of himself too. I feel like he always enjoyed just talking about stuff with Ichika during their drinking charades, and had fun visiting her. But at the same time, I feel like because of the existence of Adonis and Mikuni, Zero never really allowed his negative emotions to be "accepted" in order for him to move on, so instead it just continued piling up inside to the point of indifference towards the world and others imo. Anyway, it's sad, seeing Zero and Mikuni happily play chess together. They really look like two brothers just having fun in their own way. Hearing them say that they've been doing this since they were kids makes it all the more saddening when they realised that despite how "close" they were to each other, they never really understood each other. In a sense, I feel like in the end, both Mikuni and Zero use Adonis as a way to get the things they want and feel like it's one of the only ways they can do it? I mean, I do feel like Mikuni treasures his relationship with Zero more than Adonis or anything else, because when it comes down to it, I feel like he tries really hard to understand Zero by trying to see things from his perspective and hanging out with Ichika, the one that Zero thinks understands him best and the one Zero likes the most. On the other hand, Zero seems to use Adonis as a way for revenge of his mother and as a way to vent those emotions and scars he got, but at the same time Adonis also granted him Mikuni (a brother), and it gave him opportunities and power.

Zero definitely loves Ichika in an obsessed way, probably the only way he thinks he can love someone, since he doesn't want to become "weak" like his mother was. So if he felt anything like love, he would prefer it to be a love that would destroy him, because in a sense I think I can understand that sentiment of wanting the person you love to solely focus on yourself and no one else, whether that is hatred or whatever emotion doesn't matter, because being the entire focus of someone else's is a sort of "love" to enjoy, so I don't blame Zero for his twisted "love" lol. Especially since you can tell how much he has always enjoyed his after work beers and just chatting with Ichika. I quite enjoyed their little date walking around reminiscing the past and discovering new things they missed out on, now I really want to eat crepes🥲 The ending where Ichika kills Saeki is pretty sad though. Seeing Saeki the most relieved and happy he has ever been is probably what made me kinda happy for him though. He still sucks, but like Ichika said, I can't hate him, because it was true that he did reduce the sadness of many (whilst creating sadness for many others too though) and at the core, he was like in a sense a guy who consumed so much sadness from everywhere around him, always in pain, always sad despite his appearance, and thinking that makes it difficult for me to truly hate him.

Overall, I like the Adonis route! Initially, I was a bit sceptical whether it was really necessary and whether it would be interesting at all but I really loved bonding with all the executors. Seeing more of the human and emotional sides, seeing them warm up to Ichika and become friends with her really made me enjoy the "what could never be" part of it all. I think I especially loved Akito's because of how emotional it was tying into Kazuki and everything. But I also really enjoyed seeing the different sides of all of them. It really makes me wish Ichika got an individual route with like Akito and Sanjo and Ogata because I loveee them🥲🥲

Overall Review

I definitely enjoyed CxM: Unlimited much more than I thought I would! In the beginning, Sasazuka and Okazaki's routes kinda made me wonder whether I really wanted to continue this, but I'm so glad I got through them because I enjoyed Enomoto's, Yanagi's and Shiraishi's routes a lot! If I ranked them, I probably liked Shiraishi's the most, then Yanagi, Enomoto, Okazaki and then Sasazuka. It's definitely what I wanted in a fandisk, which is more fluffy romance and just bonding with all the guys even more, and I absolutely loveeee the potential romances with Yoshinari and Minegishi, they were so unexpectedly nice. Definitely no plot but that's okay since it's a fandisc and I think it fulfilled really well what its goal was when it comes to more romance in the story haha. 8/10! I'm definitely going to miss the characters, I'm so attached to Enomoto and them lol.