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brookebreazeale · 6 years ago

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The car stopped abruptly in the middle of the street and everyone piled out. I quickly realized that I had no idea where I was meeting Sylvie.

Thankfully, she picked up her phone and we arranged to meet at the Ice Cream shop nearby. The thought of something cold was enough to make me cry, but something frozen…ice cream, no less. The possibilities for the next 24 hours seemed endless.

After yet another prayer-inducing moto ride, I was soon chatting with Sylvie over pistachio ice cream, cramming our life stories into abbreviated versions that led us to why we were living in DRC.

Two hours later, we dashed out to find Sylvie’s car. We were losing daylight and still had a full itinerary to tackle- a tour of the city, a ‘snack’ at her house, dinner at The Orchid, a Congolese concert and dancing at the new trendy spot in town.

After a whirlwind tour of the city, we arrived at her place, hidden behind an enormous, steel gate with a guard on watch 24/7.

Her flat seemed like a penthouse. She had a huge deck overlooking the river. And she had an actual shower…with a shower head…and running water…hot, running water.

My ‘shower’

Sylvie’s spa room.

Sylvie’s roommate, Habib, had a bottle of wine chilling and a full spread waiting for us- grilled chicken, two different salads, grilled vegetables…actual green vegetables.

The day I arrived in DRC, I declared myself a vegetarian. I couldn’t’ stand to see the way the lil’ goats were treated. And that’s the meat I would be eating.

On this day, however, I happily fell off the vegetarian wagon with no remorse.

Lunch at the Sanctuary…every day.

Lunch at Sylvie’s.

Next stop was The Orchid, the hot spot for ex-pats and wealthy Congolese.

I guess this is a good time to try to explain what life is like as an ex-pat in a place like DRC. I won’t torture you with Congo’s horrific history of being exploited by ‘white men’s’ religious or mineral-seeking agendas. But you can see ‘our’ footprint everywhere you look. Congolese people are still being taken advantage of and/or repressed, but now it’s under the guise of ‘humanitarian/UN peace-keeping” or “mutually-beneficial economic/trade agreements.” That’s my very strong opinion, anyway.

It’s shocking when you first see it, the wealth juxtaposed to the blatant, extreme poverty. Enormous SUVs forge their way through the streets packed with small piles of scrap metal hovering over four wheels. Lakeside mansions surround lake Kivu, hiding tiny, dilapidated shacks behind them, all packed with an average 4-6 children. And I assure you, it’s not the international aid workers or peacekeepers occupying the latter.

And yes, Sylvie lives in one of those beautiful places on the lake. She doesn’t live quite as extravagantly as some of the larger non-profits, but she lives well.

Living well, however, comes at a cost. People who choose the life of an ex-pat in conflict or poverty-stricken countries are signing up for an extremely stressful, uncomfortable existence. It can get lonely, depressing, frustrating, and dysfunctional.

For obvious reasons, ex-pats are regarded as extremely wealthy and privileged. Most locals believe we (people from developing countries) have infinite resources. We do, comparatively speaking. But it’s hard for locals to understand that not all of us have access to those resources, that some of us really are struggling to keep our heads above water.

I’ve experienced this at the sanctuary. The boys sometimes come to me, telling me in detail about their sick child or dad’s funeral they can’t pay for. It’s heart-breaking to hear their struggles and know they think I’m just too greedy to help them. It’s also very frustrating. I truly don’t have any money to spare right now, to the contrary. But again, they can’t wrap their heads around this. I get it, but it doesn’t make it any less maddening.

On that note, we are also taken advantage of to the extreme when it comes to the buying goods and services. For example, our go-to moto driver charges us $5 each way to get to the closest internet cafe 7 kilometers away. One day, out of desperation, I flagged down some random guy to see if he would give me a ride. He agreed…for fifty cents.

Drivers charge local Congolese the equivalent of $5 or less for the 30-minute drive to Bukavu. As a foreigner, if you don’t know any better and can’t speak French, you will pay $50 or more. I know this from experience. I had a driver quote me $50 to go to Bukavu. I was told this was normal, so I agreed to his fee, getting a verbal agreement before I got in. When he dropped me off, he said I owed him $100. He did not get $100. He got $50.

I know how terrible this all sounds. Why not just give the moto driver the $10? This is infinitely more than he can make anywhere else. This could feed all of his children for a week.

But the reality is, I truly don’t have it. I’m working at the sanctuary for room and board. My sweet husband and I have made a lot of sacrifices for me to do this, financially and otherwise. I can’t ask him to wire me money everytime someone asks me to help them or overcharges me because I’m not a local.

I want to emphasize, THESE STATEMENTS ARE GENERALIZATIONS! Yes, this happens frequently. However, there are also so many honest, generous people here who would give you their last plate of beans if you were hungry, even while their stomachs were empty.

They’ve seen so much horror, experienced so much death and lived generation after generation starving, stripped of their rights, and made slaves in their own country. Yet, they still open up their homes and hearts to foreigners. I have experienced this, as well, way more times than I’ve been overcharged.

The last thing I will say here is the vast majority of people who go to work in these situations are doing it for genuinely altruistic reasons. They are sacrificing comfort, safety, relationships, sometimes their lives to try to make a positive impact in these people’s lives. They treat and pay them well. They feel guilty when their drivers drop them off at their fancy houses, then go home to their homes that are anything but.

It’s not an easy life to live, and very few are able to sustain it for more than a year or two. I respect them tremendously…I only lasted six months.

—

Another element inherent to living as an ex-pat is the very small community that is your world, which can get a bit incestuous. This means if you are single, your options are extremely limited. There is also this phenomenon that can happen when you’re reality is so far removed from that of your husband or wife or partner living back home. Communication is limited and chances to see each other, rare. Your reality becomes the world around you. You bond quickly with those who are in the same extreme situations. In other words, infidelity is rampant.

This brings us to Jaque.

Sylphie and I got to the Orchid and sat down at a cozy spot overlooking the lake. She ordered our beers and started chatting with the waiter. I closed my eyes, soaking in the cool breeze coming off the lake, relishing the chorus of French, English and Swahili swirling around me with the spirited rhythm of African drums filling in the spaces between. Any thoughts of ‘roughing it in the bush’ melted away as I waited to indulge in my second meal of the evening.. No matter that I wasn’t hungry, there was food, and it wasn’t beans potatoes, and it was hot, and the beer was cold.

But before our beers even arrived, there were two men sitting across from us. I don’t even think they knew each other. I looked around the room and couldn’t help but laugh. All eyes were on us, the men looked envious, the women annoyed.

To be clear, I am not single, nor do I have any desire to cheat on my husband. But like I said, marriage doesn’t register to most as an issue that would interfere with the night’s events.

So Jaque, a married man from France, seemed to think the night’s events were going to end in his favor. And he was NOT subtle about it.

Before I knew it, he had arranged for his driver to take us to the concert we were going to. After, we would go to a new trendy dance club. And tomorrow, we would be renting canoes from the hotel, after which we would have a fancy lunch before his driver took me back to Lwiro….all his treat.

Okay, Jaque, I’m in. As is Sylvie, who won’t be leaving my side.

Oh, it’s too bad you have to work tomorrow evening and won’t be able to accompany me and your driver back to the sanctuary…

The Orchid: Indulging in the luxury of air conditioning, uninterrupted internet, and cold beer.

A bit of local music

And, as it turns out, I can hold my own dancing Congolese style and can still stay up later than 9pm.

New girl in town…

Love those chimps, but it’s time for a cold beer and hot shower The car stopped abruptly in the middle of the street and everyone piled out. I quickly realized that I had no idea where I was meeting Sylvie.

#adventure #adventure travel #Africa #chimpanzees #Congo #democratic republic of congo #expat #living abroad #wildlife conservation #wildlife protection

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yourcertainstudentlight-blog · 6 years ago

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I'm getting online quotes with basic basic insurance... I think the lowest quote I got was $366/mo, which is bs, the car is only worth $900? Should I call and tell them that? There's no way I'm paying that much in insurance for a car that's worth that little. Can I be put on the people's insurance in whom which I live? They're not relatives. And then just pay them the amount they're insurance increases to?""

Which car would be less for insurance?

A 2003 mustang v6 or an Infiniti g35 coupe? I'm 18 and I have a clean driving record. I have the choice of getting either one.

Why do people spend so much on insurance?

I mean other than general health and drug insurance.

""If someone makes an auto insurance claim against me, does my insurer have to infrom me?""

Two years ago a girl rode her bike into my car as I pulled into my driveway. There was no damage to my car but she fell as a result of it and called her mother who asked for my insurance information. The police came and after the girl and her mother filed a police report, deemed that it was her fault for a) riding on the sidewalk and b) for not stopping when she saw the car because i was already mostly in and witnesses could prove that. Anyways, today I was shopping around for a new insurance quote when I was told they couldn't offer me coverage as I made a claim in 2010. This is the only incident that happened that year. Now, my insurance provider never informed me that a claim had been made. My premium went up but when I asked all I was told was that they had yearly increases. Is it their legal obligation to inform me if a claim has been made. If so, what are my next steps to a) clear this up and b) take action against my insurance company?""

How much will teen car insurance cost?

Okay so I'm getting my license soon. How much will my insurance be approx

Can I be put on my parent's insurance for a separate car?

I need to get insurance on my car so that I can drive it without risking anything. My parents use Allstate, so I went to their website to see about how much it would be to get insurance. I found a nice monthly payment of $108, but the down payment was over $500! I drive a crappy old car that I payed for less than that. Can my parents add another car with the insurance in my name, put me under their policy for a different car, etc. at a lower price than that? I wish it were so much easier for things. All I care for is liability, so would it be possible to just piggyback off their policy?""

Would it be cheaper to insure a van (SWB transit size) or a Car (fiesta/Clio size)On 08 Plates.?

Ive tried insurance companies buy they wont tell me anything unless i give reg no's and stuff, and i havent got it yet so i cant :s so just a basic geuss would be good, i assumed a van would be cheaper as their arnt as many luxuries and such in them?""

What's the cheapest way to get auto insurance?

My brother is planning on purchasing a 2000 dodge dakota. He is 18 and has never been insure. He is a new driver. Our parents do not have insurance.

What are some affordable nationwide health insurance plans in New /Hampshire?

looking for health insurance for my husband and unborn baby.

Will my insurance price change?

I've been on my parents insurance account for over a year with no accidents on my record and I pay 200 a month, so if I have my own account from my parents will there be any price changes of either raise or lower? I'm so confused""

How much does it cost to run your car per month?

Including tax, insurance, petrol etc. What car do you drive? And how many miles do you do a week? Just trying to work out what kind of figures I'd be looking at.""

Can i get insurance w/out a car and vice versa?

i have my license just not a car. so can i go buy a car without insurance OR can i buy insurance THEN buy a car?

Does auto insurance cover any vehicle I drive?

I wasn't expecting it but my mom told me she will no longer be driving. Her car is 5 years newer than mine and she told me should take over her car and get rid of mine. Since my car still runs well I felt I would keep it a little longer. I checked with the insurance company and I acted like we are going to sell her vehicle. I just felt it shouldn't matter which car i drove since they are similar in size. The insurance company said I would have to turn in her plates. Does auto insurance cover any car I drive and if I want to keep 2 cars for now do I have to tell the insurance company and will they allow it if I pay more for insurance?

What auto insurance companies DON'T use a credit score when deciding rates?

I'm against the practice of using credit scores (i.e. insurance scores) to decide auto insurance rates. Does anyone know of a company in the U.S. that doesn't use the practice?

Insurance rates for 19 year old?

what would the insurace rates be for a 19 year old driving one of these cars. all cars would be sedan (4-door) models. 03-04 honda civic 97-01 subaru impreza RS 96-98 BMW 318 94+ acura integra 98-01 honda accord 00-03 nissan sentra

Insurance will go up for me?

My sister drove my car and was hit from behind. Her insurance is not under my policy. Will this affect my insurance premium? I just had a accident last month also (I hit something on the road which cost $6000 to repair and my insurance covered it without increasing my premium).

My 31 year old son is moving back in for a while can I put him on my car insurance so he's covered driving ?

I have state farm insurance I just want him to be covered if he's driving one of my cars in case he has a wreck

Insurance brokers?

Y do insurance brokers force u to join bt whn its time for the insurance to pay up they tell u all sorts of stories Even though ur account was never on arreas!!! please help guys........

Bike insurance for a cbr 600?

i live in halifax nova scotia in a rural area and was woundring how much it would cost just for plpd i allready have a bike witch is a 200cc and it cost me 300 and some odd dollors for the year woundring how much it would be for a cbr 600 year around 1998-2005 and i took a drivers course for bike and car and been with my insurance company for about a year now for my bike would they give me any speacials. also i have gotten no tickets or crashed got a clean slate.

Is this quote accurate for my car insurance?

Hi ; I'm planning to buy a 1994 Honda Civic.Yesterday , I checked insurancehotline.com to see how much my insurance will cost. I'm a new driver in Toronto-Canada but have 3 years out -of- country experience. The cheapest quote which was shown is 4900 cdn.Let's be realistic guys , the car is 1500 cdn.How come is the insurance that much.How much is the approximate quote for me?""

Help!!! I need car insurance!

What company has good deals on SR22? I'm financing a new car today & I need full coverage insurance & SR22... all the online quotes I've received has been outrageous! Any knows of a good co. with low down payments? (I live in Louisiana.)

Do life insurance companies check your medical records after you die?

Let's say that you get life insurance and claim to be a non-smoker. Then let's say that you start smoking or resume smoking. Assuming that your medical records show that you ...show more

How much will insurance cost for me?

I'm 18, Male, i'm going to be driving a rx8, And i live in Washington state. I know you can't tell me exact, But around how much.""

What Texas insurance company covers composition over wood shake shingles?

Hi everyone I'm selling a house and want to be prepared to answer questions about insuring a roof with composition shingles over wood shakes (or wood shingles). I have a major carrier, but I've heard there are insurance companies that refuse to insure these roofs these days. I'd like to know for sure what insurance companies I can say cover these roofs. I am in Dallas, Texas, so it should be a company that is in Texas. Thanks so much for your help!""

How much would an '89 Mercedes 300e cost for insurance?

So my dad has found a really good deal on a potential car for me in really good condition. It's a 1989 Mercedes Benz 300e. Do you think that since this is a 22 year old car that it'd be a ridiculous amount to insure because of the Mercedes badge? Or do you think I could afford it with a job? My insurance company would be allstate, on my parents plan, I have a 4.0GPA and I plan on taking drivers ed. Advice?""

How can I get cheaper car insurance as a new young driver?

Hello I'm a first year University student and I'm now looking to get my first car. As you may all know, the prices for insurance specially on young drivers are very high and I obviously will not be able to afford 350 a month for insurance even on my part-time job. I just wanted to know if there were any legal ways of my getting a cheaper quote. Could I insure under my uncle's name who has 9+ years NCB on his license? I'm aware of fronting and that most parents do it in order to get a cheaper quote for the son/daughter but i'm sure there are other legal ways of getting cheaper insurance right? I've previously driven in other countries if that also helps. All help will be greatly appreciated Thank you, Robert""

Statute of limitations on no car insurance fine?

how long has to go by before statute of limitations is in effect after you have had a no insurance ticket handed to you and does this stand the same if you had hit another persons vehicle with the car that was uninsured.i live in calgary alberta and am unsure of how this statute works.i am not looking for a cop out of this.this occured 3 years ago and i was sent home under the condition that i show up for court.i was unable to show up for court because i had been kicked out of where me and my mom were living and tried to find a place for us.

What type of Life Insurance Should I get?

I am 33 and I'm pretty sure that I want to get term life insurance. I have a wife and 2 kids. It's affordable. I'm in good health. My question is should I get a 15 yr plan or 20 yr plan? Money is a little tight so I'm thinking the 500K or 750K plan.

Insurance on a car that you do not own yourself?

Im 17 years old. My grandma will buy me a car. But she doesn't want me on her insurance, so she said i had to wait til i was 18 til she would buy it. I was wondering if it's possible for my mom to put insurance on the car for me, if she's not that one that own's it. She can't on it for medicaid reasons. Thanks.""

I can't afford this forced health insurance by my college! help!?

My college is telling me that it is mandatory by law that as a full time student, that I have health insurance. I will be getting my own separate health insurance at the end of the month, but tell then i have to pay the full amount with the health insurance ($1,695) I can't afford that! is there anything i can do? they told me i can't request a deferral. i don't live on campus. I only paid $200 a month last year, (I had my own insurance) but I also received less in financial aid. all of this access payment is just for health insurance! is there ANYTHING i can do?""

What's the annual policy premium?

I have an amount of 623 dollars for annual policy premium for life insurance. Do I have to pay the amount?

How much is insurance for 2008 bentleyy?

DO they Ask How you Got the money if you buy it just wondering thats my dream car lol

What is the cheapest type of car insurance?

""How Can i keep my car, without paying insurance?""

I have a car that i DONT want to sell, but i will not be using very often, can i keep it WITHOUT paying insurance, because obviously it would be a waste of money to be paying insurance on a car that i do not drive.""

Car insurance question?

How do the authorities find out that you have no insurance on your car? I know that if you are pulled over or whatever you can be asked to prove you are insured to drive the car and all, that much is obvious. Thing is, I called up to cancel my insurance on a car which isnt working and Im waiting on being scrapped. The insurance company said that its illegal for the car to be on the road without being insured, regardless of wheither or not its being used. As it turns out I am gona have to keep theinsurance for a few extra days until the car is uplifted, but it got me thinking. If Im not using the car then theres no chance Id be pulled over, so is there any actual way that anyone would find out a car in that position wasnt insured? Other than something like tha handbrake slipping and it rolling into the parked car in front or something. Cheers!""

How do i transfer my brother's car to my name in california?

its a 1974 vw bus. i want it as my car. how much is it to change it to my name? and im 17 how much wud the cheapest insurance be? and the tags are a few months outdated.. wat am i getting into?

How much does auto insurance cost in Orange County?

can someone please just give me a rough estimate of the cost per month for one car? Just a used sedan, nothing fancy. I am a single male with a good record. I know it would vary based on a lot of factors, but I'm just looking for a ballpark figure for cost per month.""

Cheapest and best flood insurance?

I live in Az and was told my townhome was is in a flood zone and I need flood insurance. How much does this cost and wheres the cheapest place to get it. Another guy in the unit next to me said his mortgage company forced the insurance on his loan and it was 2,500 a year so his mortgage went up 300 a month!! thats seems like an insane amount? Please help.""

Appropriate and affordable health insurance for my autistic son?

Here is the situation: My son is seven and severely autistic. He lives with his mom (we are divorced). As part of our agreement, I take care of his health insurance and medical bills, co-pays and things related to his medical care. I pay for insurance for him thru my employer, around $280 a month, just for him. However, although it is pretty good for office visits, it is really bad for hospital. Because he is autistic, he has to be knocked out for some procedures that he wouldn't normally be knocked out for. Recently he incurred a $9000 bill, which the insurance company wont pay because he already maxed out his hospital indemnity for the year. I feel that the time has come to provide him with some sort of hospital indemnity, but I can't find any that I can actually afford. I don't make very much, I make enough to pay his regular health insurance and his child support, and the occasional doctor bill. But I don't make enough to pay the huge premiums that a regular hospital indemnity plan has. To add another wrinkle, I live in New York, he lives with his mom in Connecticut, she is the one who brings him to the doctor/hospital, I'm just the one who pays for it, which I am happy to do. But the problem is, that anything available with NY, only covers providers in NY. CT wont work with me because i do not live there. Am I screwed (as in I have to pay 900 per month in hospital insurance), or is there something I can do? By the way, I make about $36000 per year, not a lot for New York. I just want to provide the best care for my son, but I need something I can actually afford""

What auto insurance companies DON'T use a credit score when deciding rates?

I'm against the practice of using credit scores (i.e. insurance scores) to decide auto insurance rates. Does anyone know of a company in the U.S. that doesn't use the practice?

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/cars-cheap-insure-david-davis/"

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