#anyway: people being dumb about felix's song did inspire this

[faunandfloraas]

The thing where people obsessively go over lyrics and act like everything in a song must be 100% real and autobiographical is so..... boring. And annoying.

[fireemblems24]

I have the rest of the game in my queue, so don't feel pressured to get to them all. It'll take a while for me to write everyone back anyways. But, yes! Blue Lions reactions are the ones I look the more forward too.

The Claude mistrust continues through most of AG. And #deserved.

I was living for all the little stories about Rodrigue and co growing up. I'm so happy Hopes added more about that.

Yuri looking at Dimitri and wishing M!Preg was real. That support chain is actually really cool. And, minor spoilers I guess, but Yuri's like "I'm only here because you're side is winning" in GW and SB, and in AG he's like "Dimitri, I protect you and fight for you because your plan will make my dreams come true." IDK, man, there's something so satisfying about seeing a commoner only believing in Dimitri, the only one who doesn't claim he knows what's best for them, and coming close to openly disliking the two who think they know better than everyone else.

Sylvain was a bit put out by that from Dedue, lamo.

RIP Annette/Felix. Someone who wrote this had a gay!Felix agenda lol. Esp the Dimilix because it exists outside their supports too. (I don't see why Felix just can't sleep with all of them and the Blue Lions just have a giant open relationship lol)

I'm glad they at least threw a few crumbs for the CoS. It's so funny how Dimitri (at least pre-Hopes, post Hopes I don't see this as much) was "the dumb one," but he is the only leader with a nuanced take on the church (Claude really just sounds like an utter moron and Edelgard you can never tell if she's actually believing the crap she's spewing bc she'll also say "I'm using this as an excuse")

How they picked and choose which ships got fed and which didn't is weird. Maybe Mercidue or Annette/Felix aren't popular in Japan?

I loved how Hopes did more supports about Annette's goofy songs.

Yuri's final support with Seteth goes more into the crest stuff and his backstory. It's inspiring me to replay 3H and get Wolves supports. But I'm DYING to do a Byleth + Dimitri only playthrough, which would make support unlocking harder so . . .

I really love the conflict with Sreng because no one is right or wrong. It's two people fighting over a resource that's vital to survive, but in limited supply in the region. It's interesting because there's no easy answer.

This route handled Edelgard starting the war much better than Houses. It makes sense for Dimitri's character to feel guilty and would seem hella OOC if he didn't bring that up, but bc of how other things are written, it sometimes comes across like Dimitri should get blamed for the war because he didn't hand over to Edelgard everything she wanted for no reason other than she wants it. So having Shez say that balances it, lets' Dimitri stay in character, but keeping it from being so borderline victim blaming.

I know it's Rodrigue who dies if you don't recruit Byleth. I know there's some cool cut scene too (and something between Felix and Dimitri?). If I ever replay, I'll just have two save files and only move on in the one where he lives lol.

I always hated how the fandom got angry at Rodrigue for trying to treat Dimitri well just because Felix was suffering too. The best thing about Hopes' existence is how the fandom turned around about Rodrigue.

Azure Gleam Ch 11

Spoilers below for AG Ch 11.

STORY

RODRIGUE is back. You have no idea how happy I am that he got more screen time (and is now playable!)

Ashe's not happy that some nobles kept their titles after turning coat, but they can't afford the chaos changing things would create right now, but they plan to in the future.

I am living for the Big Dad energy Rodrigue always has.

Do we get to kill Caspar's Dad? Please let me kill Caspar's dad.

Felix asking the right questions - asking if they can trust Claude. Annette doesn't trust Claude. Ingrid neither, but doesn't think he's as bad as Annette and Felix.

Gustave and the Knights of Serios are keeping the Alliance in check.

Once again, people asking if Dimitri can kill his step-sister. But Dimitri's like, guys, I killed Rufus. I can handle it.

Ohh, a letter from Patricia? If it doesn't have new info, why bring it up? Something disturbing. Confirmation she was always bad.

Yep, she helped plot Duscur. I mean, we all guessed she was an awful human being, so now we know.

Like, I don't blame Patricia for missing Edelgard or whatever, but setting your child step-son to get butchered alongside tons of other innocent people is straight-up evil.

Dimitri's worried about Shez, and she's opening up to him. It's pretty sweet. It's also so sweet how much they trust Shez even if she doesn't trust herself.

Honestly, Dimitri and Shez are so cute, as friends or more, it doesn't matter, they have a great relationship.

Shez would rather die than kill her friends 😭 We won't let that happen (it better not happen)

MAP/SIDE BATTLES

Seteth said he trusts me 😭😭😭

Rodrigue got to say two things this time, which means he made up for lost time last chapter.

Ok guys, Shamir just went up in my books. She said as a mercenary she'll get hired to kill anyone, but prefers killing bad guys, like the Empire. I love it. She hasn't said anything like this in GW or SB.

SHEZ & RODRIGUE B

LAMO, omg, I love Shez.

So it starts with Rodrigue taking Shez very seriously as Shez talks about how the war may be over by next winter because she . . . wants to have a snowball fight, like all the Kingdom kids got to do.

It's actually kind of sweet, seeing Shez want to just play and have fun with the Blue Lions.

Rodrigue, of course, love the idea.

And takes snowball fighting too seriously, talking strategy. Of a snowball fight. OMG I love this. I love him.

He'd do full-out battle with Lambert and go with kids.

Rodrigue lost, lamo.

So Lambert would rush into battle alone, and Shez thinks like father like son with Dimitri.

I also love how Rodrigue thinks Gautier is cowardly for laying and ambush for Lambert, but is totally fine with his own sneaking and waiting to strike.

It ended with them getting cussed out by Ingrid's dad for not taking the mountain seriously.

Shez can invite Rodrigue to join in.

Oh, man, I wish I got to see this fight. I can only imagine Felix when he realizes Rodrigue is involved and thinking it's dumb for taking it seriously, then taking it seriously. Ingrid being an absolute tyrant ordering people to follow her strategies. Dimitri scared he'll knock someone's teeth out. Mercedes being absolutely savage. And so on...

DIMITRI & YURI C

Excited for this.

Yuri's told a "funny knight" who's really strong is helping everyone out who sometimes sounds sheltered and obtuse and sometimes not. Yep. It's Dimitri.

Yuri's not happy seeing Dimitri in dangerous allies. Worried about him. But Dimitri wants to learn how the commoners live so he can help them rule better.

OMG, Yuri's like "you don't have an heir," worried about the civil war that will happen if Dimitri dies.

Yuri is determined for Dimitri to live a long and happy life because the people of Faerghus like Dimitri and Yuri likes the commonfolk of Faerghus.

Also love how Yuri points out that if war breaks out, nobles will die, but commoners get slaughtered. Wish he'd tell Edelgard that.

Haha, he says to bring Dedue at least.

OMG, I love Dimitri. He then just asks Yuri to be his bodyguard.

And Dimitri won't ask Dedue because he knows Dedue will just forbid Dimitri from coming, like a nanny, lol.

Yuri's entertained that Dimitri asked him to be a bodyguard.

SYLVAIN & DEDUE B

Dedue is impressed with Sylvain for interacting with a woman like a normal person lamo.

"Don't expect praise for merely doing your job." I love Dedue. That's savage af.

Sylvain was motivated to mature by Felix and Dimitri. He said they're both like brothers, which is why he wouldn't get left behind. I love this group.

Oof, Dedue "had" a sister. And now we're getting to learn about her. 😭 She liked flower crowns and was determined when she set her mind to it.

Dedue wants Sylvain to visit Duscur after the war, to visit her grave together 😭

SYLVAIN & FELIX A

Felix got into a fight with soldiers . . . . because they were making fun of Sylvain.

Felix called it the "worst decision in his life." Of course. Felix being Felix.

Felix didn't tell Sylvain because he was worried about Sylvain hearing the details about what people said about him.

I love the idea of Felix getting into a fist-fight with people insulting Sylvain lamo.

Sylvain thinks he deserves his bad reputation because of who he used to be. Felix challenged why Sylvain didn't change sooner. Sylvain has no defense lol.

Felix is ok with people making fun of Sylvain, but only certain people lamo.

Felix is blushing after saying something nice lol. Now he's pissed at Sylvain. And insulting him. Very typical Felix.

Sylvain says he's 7% more cunning than Felix lamo.

This one did go more into ship bait. I was surprised how un-shippy their C was, but I'm sure Sylvix fans loved this one.

DIMITRI & MERCEDES A

They're traveling to a village together. It's the one Mercedes used to live in. Dimitri likes how calm it is.

Mercie called Dimitri her friend 😭😭

Dimitri claims he's a king's knight lol. He catches himself. Also village woman finds Dimitri handsome. She has taste.

Mercedes and Dimitri talk about how open minded the church is and give credit to the overall teachings (lamo, eat shit, Claude)

Mercedes is grateful to Dimitri to taking in the Central Church because it helped the village out. It's why she brought him there, so he could see the good that comes from protecting the church.

Mercedes plans to show him around the town and introduce Dimitri to her mother and the priest.

Dimitri's nervous lol. Hahaha, Mercie says she'll tell him he's someone "very important" which flusters him lamo.

She made him laugh and smile.

This support was adorable. (and feels like it couldn't possibly be the same writers as SB and GW lamo)

MERCEDES & DEDUE B

Sad they only get one support. Their Houses one was amazing.

Mercedes is teaching cooking. The little girl gets scared of Dedue when he arrives to fetch Mercie.

Poor Dedue frightens children and animals :(

Mercie says lots of the kids are orphans, so they're scared, and that Dedue looks intimidating. She has a plan to make him not look as scary.

I KNEW IT! He's handing out flower crowns. I was going to say it was something with flowers.

Now all the kids love Dedue. Good. He's the sweetest man in Fodlan.

Dedue teaches them how to make the crowns.

Dedue is happy with Mercedes, but Mercie says it was Dedue's kindness who won them over. Of course they both give each other credit.

They both have such strong mom and dad energy.

SHEZ & ANNETTE A

Annette's up late working on music lol. Shez thinks the notes look like bugs lol.

Annette won't sing it though :( Her songs are legendary.

She wants a song that makes people feel happy when they sing it. Very Annette.

She heard the song Shez passed around getting sung by a dying mercenary, who died happy though because they appreciated the song. It made Annette appreciate the song more.

She is such a sweetie.

It's sweet to have a whole support revolve around Annette realizing her songs make people happy and help people. She'd love that.

OMG, I love Annette. Her new song is about a feast, then they go to get more ingredients, and then get into a death battle with a bear. Truly a child of Faerghus.

RAPHAEL & FELIX C

Raphael is drooling over Felix's food, so he gives it to Raphael, and Felix offers to go buy more.

Felix thinks he hears thunder, but it's just Raphael's stomach.

Felix is being nice, lol, insisting Raphael eat some of his food.

But now he's annoyed that Raphael called him a "meat buddy" or a bit. Felix likes the idea of hunting that Raphael suggested.

Raphael is so nice not even Felix can manage to get mad at him.

SYLVAIN & IGNATZ C

Sylvain feels bad because he interrupted Ignatz painting. He wanted Ignatz to look at a painting he brought home.

Sylvain knows painting styles (he knows it's not a common Faerghus style). But ofc Sylvain is interested in how pretty the woman in the painting is lamo.

He's curious about the woman's identity, but it doesn't seem in a fuck boy way, but a curiosity over a favorite piece of art way.

That Sylvain is into art just made him even cooler.

Religious art often has their symbols in the art (and Flayn's is fish lamo, good).

As a major art fan, I love this support adding little tid bits about Fodlan art.

Lamo, Sylvain studied art to impress ladies at first, but now he actually likes it.

SETETH & YURI C

Yuri chatted with a scholar, wanting to learn about the 10 elites because he didn't get a good education.

It's a support to explain how crests came to be and their powers

Yuri trusts Seteth with his crest secrets (partly because he knows Seteth already knows, and partly bc Yuri has taste)

Seteth encourages Yuri to cherish his crest and the power it brings

So is Yuri the son of an elite or something?

FLAYN & SHEZ B

Flayn thinks Shez looks good because she's dirty and that suites her lol. I love Flayn.

Flayn is wearing perfume. Seteth probably doesn't know lamo.

Flayn talks about how perfumes coming in trend shows that even in dark times, it's not all consuming. Very Flayn of her.

We're going trend shopping. She doesn't get to shop often.

Flayn is straight-up making shit up, lamo. She invented that Shez wanted to shop to raise Shez's spirits, not hers.

It's this more -uh - questionable side of Flayn that keeps her from being a one-note, overly sweet character. I love it.

CATHERINE & SHEZ C

Count Charon asks Catherine for more soldiers, but only Dimitri or Rhea could give that order.

Shez didn't know Catherine's family. She stays vague about it when Shez asks about her past.

Catherine, unsurprisingly, says she'd fight for Rhea if had to choose between her or her family.

Catherine asks why Shez is here. Oh, I can pick too - for friends, money, or to fight Byleth. Def picking friends. I think that suits AG Shez best.

Catherine looks happy with that answer.

Oh, I like that, live in a way that makes your past self proud.

ASHE & FELIX B

Their only support.

Oh, Felix is confronting Ashe about how he's a knight working for Dimitri. Should've known it would be about this.

Ashe defends Felix when he calls Dimitri a boar and tiresome lol.

Ashe says Dimitri does his job for him, omg, Dimitri, stop (but that's he's getting better).

Felix is like - you have to steal your job back from him!!! Use force if you have too - I love this, lamo

Dimitri promoted a lot of commoners to be knights, and there were some minor misunderstandings at first, but now no one cares

Felix asks Ashe if he's a noble or commoner, and Ashe is like kinda both actually, which is true

Awww, Dedue comes to Ashe's aids when he needs it (and Dimitri, but Ashe mentioned Dedue too)

And now Ashe is singing Dedue's praises, and ofc Felix insults Dedue, saying that blind loyalty will get him killed

And omg hahaha, Ashe is like that's sweet Felix, that you care about us, I always knew

I love how almost no one takes Felix's tsun seriously. They're all like "aww, look, he's chewing my old slipper!" energy

Ashe putting Felix in his place round 2, I love this. Ashe and Felix is always gold

Felix is like, it's just because more work for me if something happens to you!

Then he's finally nice, telling Ashe he does a good job

ANNETTE & SYLVAIN B

Their only support

This time it's Sylvain who catches Annette singing. Annette seems relieved rather than embarrassed.

Sylvain thinks her song is creepy (covers that, saying creative) and that only Annette could make it (affectionate - maybe)

Why is Annette always singing about swamp beasties?

Sylvain wants a song about something cute instead, so Annette naturally jumps to huge bears lamo

We need an Annette Bernedetta support about finding creepy stuff cute

Annette doesn't seem upset with criticism

Also, this is the second time Sylvain talks to Annette like a person and doesn't really flirt with her, more like siblings vibes it's cute

Annette's next song is even creepier lamo But Sylvain likes it anyways

DIMITRI/RODRIGUE/SYLVAIN PARALOGUE

This one is easy since all 3 are leveled up. I want to do other ones, but I may wait to save some cash lol.

They're up north, so Sreng? Yep.

So they're preparing for a Sreng raid.

So a hostage that grew up in Faerghus is now leading the raid. And Margrave Gautier treated him well even though he felt bitter about Sreng killing his wife. So Miklain's mother?

And now the Sreng hostage is using Fodlan knowledge against them.

Haha, Sylvain was going off about being lazy forgetting his dad was right there lol.

It's cool seeing papa Gautier and Rodrigue together.

The Sreng commander really came across like a dick. Rubbing in Miklain's death, not caring about all the men he got killed.

So did Claude do this in AG too? Incite Sreng? They guess Cornelia and someone from Adrestia too, which could be the case in AG.

Gautier takes credit for the fall. Sylvain got through to the guy apparently.

Dimitri's just happy they share a language now. He would know how important that is since he learned the language of Duscur.

I'm glad they fight over land. It's way more interesting and realistic than whatever the hell they did with Almyra.

Aww, Sylvain is dedicated to reaching peace with Sreng. Of course his dad is harder edged because they killed his wife.

Sylvain being so bent on peace and diplomacy just makes the people who claim he makes sense in CF make even less sense.

I had Shez believe in Sylvain, because AG!Shez is nice Shez.

Sylvain and Dimitri both hate resorting to violence and using warfare first. Both want to avoid it at all cost. I like the future of these two both being important in Faerghus.

Oh, cool, talk between Rodrigue and Matthais. I love the little stories we get of all of them. They were trouble makers lamo. They snuck out the night of the festivities.

Lambert wanted peace with Sreng and Duscur. Dimitri's half-way there, and he and Sylvain are working on the other half.

Gautier now agrees with Sylvain, Lambert, and Dimitri and a pathway to peace.

Aww, Rodrigue advised that he apologize to Sylvain, and he's going too.

Oh, I got the lance of ruin! Cool. Sylvain has his weapon now.

FINAL BATTLE

Not Dimitri being more understanding of the Empire nobles who''ll follow any leader that promises them more land than Edelgard does him and the other Blue Lions

He's thinking from the other's perspective, how it looks to them, not what it actually is - Claude and Edelgard could never

Shez is like, no need to feel guilty, hell yes

Felix is worried about Dimitri, in his very Felix way, meanwhile Dedue is like "we trust you"

I love so much that the importance of his friends' support is stressed so much more in AG.

Oh, I get Constance and Linhardt this battle. Cool.

Felix got lectured by Rodrigue lamo, he wanted to break ranks to chase after Monica

Lamo, Manuela's defeat quote is that she won't die single. Ngl, glad she just retreated.

It's really something that the Blue Lions show way more sympathy towards their enemy than the other routes do. They're the only ones that feel guilty for "invading." When the others are invading.

Glad they're bringing up that if they don't do this, Adrestia will not stop until Faerghus is destroyed.

Rodrigue has such a nice voice.

Felix got angry with Rodrigue when he said all the blame for invading will fall on Dimitri, but then Rodrigue said it's up to Felix to support him through it. This really is Dimilix the route, lamo.

Felix is like, duh.

Why is Shez talking to Rodrigue while it's late. I'm getting flashbacks. He died last time this happened.

They're both worried about Dimitri. And it's cannon that Dimitri falls asleep at his desk. Sooo much fanart of that lol.

Apparently Lambert did the same. Like father, like son.

Lambert had a shorter temper than Dimitri, but are very similar. Unlike Rodrigue and Felix. I get to disagree with Rodrigue there, so I will. Because I think they're more alike than they both think.

Ok guys, we finally got it. Why Felix is miserable outside of AM. He can't live without a great purpose pushing him forward. And in SS, VW, and CF he finds no great purpose, unlike in AM where working with Dimitri towards his version of the future does work.

When Lambert died, Rodrigue struggled to find another reason for being. So he devoted himself to his promise to Lambert, to make sure he sets his won back on his proper path is he loses his way.

Shez feels like Dimitri's been helping her, but she's helping Dimitri too. Like what Rodrigue is doing.

Rodrigue says he's only Dimitri's retainer, that's so false. But he says Shez is in a unique spot since she's a friend first, then he's her leader. Which makes me happy.

More teasing about Shez's origins.

Rodrigue says though that Shez's background or powers aren't what's important, it's about who Shez is as a person. I love so much how the Blue Lions keep repeating this idea, that it's not Byleth's or Shez's power. It's their worth as a person that matters.

Arval just called Rodrigue a wonderful human being. Based.

xxxx

[kynikoisto]

GETTING TO KNOW MYSELF✨

1. Museum date or aquarium date? Why?

Museum dates because being surrounded by such environment feels like going back in time and I would love to learn the meaning behind every art pieces.

2. Describe your favorite type of weather.

Cold rainy season. Perfect for reading a good book, sipping hot choco, covered with heavy blankets.

3. Name a subject/topic you know a lot about.

4. Do you have any friends or know anyone with the same name as you?

I know a girl who happen to have the same name as I am as her second name back in SH.

5. What’s something most people love that you hate?

Attention.

6. Who knows the most about you personally?

7. If you could create ANY mix-up or mythical animal and have it be brought to life, what would it be?

Dragons and Phoenix.

8. Do you think everyone in our lives serves a purpose, or are some people just there?

I believe our lives serve a purpose or else life is just depressing. And by depressing, I mean lacking motivation. And boring.

9. How do you feel about getting your picture taken?

Uncomfortable but still doing it anyway for the sake of capturing memories I can look to when I'm older.

10. Any guilty pleasure/s?

Procrastinating 😒

11. What is your favorite Studio Ghibli film and why?

Haven't watch everything yet but so far I really like Spirited Away.

12. Do you always make eye contact with people when you’re speaking to them?

I try to.

13. Have you ever self-harmed?

N E V E R in a million years.

14. What’s the nicest compliment you’ve ever been given?

Can't remember if there's any but it feels good to be called "smart" or "intelligent".

15. Have you felt butterflies in your stomach today?

I was about to say, "Sadly, no." but then I remember watching tiktok and saw a Hyunjin edit saying "I love everything about you." and the feels was sending me! 😭❤️💖 It feels as if it was directed to me. 😢💞 He was actually reading a comment and then he asked, "You love everything about me?" then he had that cute little smile on his face uwuuu I just want to protect him at all cost 💪🤧

16. Did anyone/anything get on your nerves today?

Yes! haha it's about the prisoner who escaped and I was thinking about how dumb the police officers who ordered him to go out to "fetch some water". 🤦‍♀️

17. Is there something you currently want, that you can’t have?

18. Who was the last person to make you feel embarrassed or uncomfortable?

One of my classmates.

19. Think of the last film you watched. Who was your favorite character in it?

Jo March from Little Women 😊

20. What are you known for?

21. What is something you are skeptical about?

22.If you have a job, do you prefer morning shifts or evening shifts?

I'm nocturnal. I'm more creative at nights so evening shifts it is.

23. What is something you are most confident about?

How about something you're really insecure about?

My competency.

24. What do you think in general of girls with short hair? How about guys with long hair?

Absolutely gorgeous! 💖✨

25. With films in languages you do not speak, do you prefer a dub or a subtitle?

Subtitle.

26. If you wear makeup, what are your preferred brands?

27. What part of a person's body do you usually find the most attractive?

Neck and arms.

28. What/which music are you currently listening to?

Classical.

29. Do you find smoking unattractive?

It depends on which context it was used for. Because in art, it looks good as it adds personality and mystery but I don't like it in-person knowing I could be a second-hand smoker which is dangerous for my health.

30. What was the last thing you looked up on Google?

Eating chipmunk or squirrel.

31. What is the 10th picture in your phone gallery?

Sleeping Pumpkin – my cat.

33. What job would you be terrible at and what job would you be good at?

32. Would you ever dye your hair an unnatural color?

Of course!

34. Do you think forgiveness is mandatory to move on from something?

35. What did you think was cool when you were younger?

"I thought jejemon was cool." 💀

36. Is there a place that makes you sad to return to?

My elementary and jh school. It reminds me of all the disappointments I've been through and I have a lot of bad memories in there.

37. What's the best advice anyone has ever given you?

Can't remember the exact words but it goes like, "If you have that passion. If you have that fire in you. No matter how small or big it is. As long as you still have it. I believe you can do anything that you set your mind into." by Felix.

38. Have you ever treated someone badly just because someone else treated you badly?

Guilty

39. What's your favorite lyric from your favorite song right now?

I'm always looking for my way with the blueprint

The answers the world has given to me are wrong

I always dream of my blueprint coming true

I'll proudly achieve my dream

My future is bright

- Blueprint by Stray Kids

40. What was the last thing that completely took your breath away?

41. Is it true that if you can't love yourself, you can't love another?

I believe so.

42. What's the most positive thing you could say to yourself right now?

43. What time of the day feels the most magical to you?

17:20

44. Were you a cute baby?

👉👈

45. Is there something you wish you had said sorry for, but never did?

46. What is any creative talent you wish you had?

Musical talent, please! 🙏

47. Do you think you'd make a good teacher? Why or why not?

I don't know. It's not my passion and am very impatient but whenever someone asks me about something and I somehow know a lot about it and share it to them, I could go all in and get very hype about it but it looks like they get bored so easily so I just immediately stop and take a step back. So I'm always not able to share all the knowledge that I have and try not to go dig deeper when explaining stuff because all my efforts are only going to go to waste if they're not interested. And eventually things could also get to the point where someone thinks I'm a "know-it-all" when I'm certainly not.

48. Do you think it's possible to fix a "broken" relationship?

49. If you chose to get a tattoo what would it be and where would you want it?

Haven't thought about it yet.

50. When was the last time you stayed up past midnight and what were you up to?

Now. Looking for that beautiful inspiring words Lee Felix said years ago but I can't find it on the internet. Why???!

[chucklestheechidona]

Freedom Fighters - An Unceremonious Death

For the love of god let them die

Look, I like the Freedom Fighters. More the reboot than the preboot, they have less baggage, but still, I respect what they did. But if you’ve read my other dumb things you also know I think Red Dwarf USA had a real chance of working, so maybe I’m just insane.

Either way, this whole Rally For Sally business has been going around and disturbing the usual culprits from their dens and I feel I should say something.

“The American Canon“

This is a stupid sentence and yet thrown around as you like. There is no American canon, there is just “The Canon” and “Non-canon.” Believe it or not, the people who make the product get to decide what’s done with it and what is canon.

If you made something and then in France they made an entirely different story with concepts and themes you didn’t want to explore, you’d be hesitant about including or acknowledging it. Same with Sega of Japan.

But then why did Sega allow this to be made?

Well, I think this needs a tad bit of history behind it.

We’re going to the 90′s

Denim was in, the future was here, everything in 2000′s would be chrome and the Y2k bug was on the horizon.

Ohno

But Sega of Japan had an issue. Their arcade machines were selling like nobody’s business but they wanted that sweet console piece of the pie, but had no winning mascot. Alex Kidd, unfortunately, wasn’t moving as many consoles as they had hoped, god knows not enough to rival Mario.

They needed something cool, something different, somethi- It’s Sonic. You know it is, I know it is, I ain’t dragging this on.

It did well enough in Japan, but Sega was focusing on international markets with this game. It had a somewhat universal design, helped by the basis being Felix and Mickey Mouse which were popular around the world, with catchy songs based on both Japanese and American releases from the past.

It was going to be a hit.

Or... was it?

Did they need to do more?

Well, Sega doesn’t just have Sega of Japan. It had SOE and SOA as well. Europe and America respectively. Others too I’m sure but my memory’s off.

SoA and SoJ had a somewhat shaky relationship with each other, but then again, so did other companies back then. It was a new foray into public relations. Japan built the consoles that actually sold, America had to sell them, but there was a big gap between the countries, how things were interpreted, different values, and let’s not forget, American pride and greed.

AMERICA in the 90′s

SOJ needed this thing to sell big. Sonic was going to be a global success if they could help it. And let’s be honest, it was.

America had it’s own plans on what Sonic should be, and SOJ actually listened to some of them. Madeline Schroeder, product manager at the time for Sega in the US, actually went to Japan to say what she thought Sonic would be. As of this, they removed Madonna and Sonic’s tie-in with a band, as well as changing certain design traits in the US because “Sonic looked too Japanese.“

And then had the gall to call herself the “Mother Of Sonic”

Again, in a world where shitting on other people’s culture is a big no-no, and for good reason, how that managed to be fine is insane.

It’s a Japanese fucking product, Madeline.

Alongside this, as SOA hadn’t had much access to the Japanese backstories (although, the manuals should have been fine enough), when it came to marketing the games as an ongoing story (and ready in time for the cartoons they wanted to push) SOA made their own Sonic Bible, for use outside of non-Japanese territories.

This would have the seeds of what most people know, Freedom Fighters, Eggman once being good, Sonic being part of the good fight, etc.

[Astoundingly, when they made the cartoons and everything, Fleetway would be the one to actually stick closer to this than Archie/Satam/Underground/Aosth ever did so who’s talking about canon now huh]

Japan didn’t really notice nor take heed. One could make a good case for their complete obliviousness to what SOA was doing. You can tell because absolutely nothing from the bible/comics/magazine ever appeared in a Japanese Sonic game. Spinball was Sega Technical Institute, an American Division. Not Sega of Japan.

On top of this, as I see a bunch of people who go “Sega is disrespecting the American canon”, interesting fact. In Europe and Japan, the manual for Sonic CD clearly states Amy Rose is in the game. Sega of America actually edited this to say Sally, despite not going through and changing the sprites. If that’s not disrespect towards the creators of the games I don’t know what is.

The Canon

The problem I find with this is that, let’s be honest, if we had to look at this from an objective viewpoint:

Japan released a game.

America sought to profit off it, but didn’t like it was very much Japanese, not American.

They changed the story to be more American themed, changed the art design to look more American drawn, and ignored the Japanese additions to the games by editing out the Japanese characters in the manuals.

Because they wanted to profit off a different culture’s work by changing it wholesale so it didn’t resemble the culture it came from.

Nothing about SatAm’s premise or creation says anything about the original material it came from, just heavily adapted without any input from it’s creators to resemble a more American product.

You know how Japan saw Sonic?

This cute lad who acted more like a cartoon Felix the Cat type figure.

Now I get it, especially in the 90′s, everyone was localising. The markets weren’t as much the same, god knows they gave Ratchet attack eyebrows to be appealing etc.

But this was so anti-Japanese that the fact they were profiting at all from a Japanese product is insane.

Adventure

Ha

Back in Japan in the 90′s, they didn’t really have much of an idea what they were doing with the canon. They had plans but they seemed to be not as stable as they would have liked. The amount of games they were pumping out with different Eggman attacks and characters and if the GG games fit in with the MD games-

They needed something a bit more stable.

So when it was their time for their biggest game yet, they started to reign things in. In Japan. In Europe.

In America.

Sonic Adventure would be the basis for the stories for the next decade or so, with some revisions on what came before, what was mainline, what have you.

At this point, SOA’s cartoons had all died and the only thing remaining in the Sonic canon from that time was the Archie comic, still ongoing. But yet America still pulled this stuff off.

In the original script, Eggman is still Eggman. None of this “I AM DOCTOR ROBOTNIK, GENIUS OF THE WORLD” schtick.

No changing the manuals this time at least, so they’re getting better.

Over time, the only surviving things to come out of the canon, which Sega was nice enough to do considering, was

- Chilli-dogs - I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG - Robotnik being Maria’s surname

Didn’t you have something to say about the Freedom Fighters?

Why yes I do.

So, the Freedom Fighters for me, as much as I like them as , represent an American centrism. Not only was America not a Sega dominated market, for Nintendo did better and Europe was buying Sega consoles like candy, but the characters and show weren’t that popular outside the country anyway.

Ask someone in Europe in the 90′s who Sally Acorn was and unless they had access to a specific channel they wouldn’t have the first idea. Amy Rose, for sure, she was in the games. 

I didn’t know who Sally was until Mega Collection Plus came out, and the UK STILL manages to get Sonic games in the top of the charts when they come out.

Aosth was shown more abroad with more appeal, the comics weren’t sold internationally, let alone in Japan.

To be all “But these characters cemented the Western fanbase” is mental.

The comics sold somewhere in the tens of thousands in their hey-day. At the same time, Sonic games were selling millions. The comic and show are so old that unless you were part of the 20,000 buying the comics recently or pirated them, you don’t even know who they are.

Fleetway was the only Sonic comic we got in the UK, and there’s more fans that have grown up with Sonic Adventure being the basis which had absolutely no inspiration from the Western products.

These characters are relics of America taking the mick out of a Japanese product in order to make more money and produce shows.

To say they’ve made a big impact on Sonic in the world is really stretching it.

F.A.Q

But you said you liked the FF’s!

I do, but in the same way I like AU’s. It was interesting, of it’s time and it said a lot about the culture it was made in. Like, comparable to Tails gets Trolled or Fleetway

B-but I really like the FF’s!

Good for you, don’t let me stop you. Again, I like a bunch of the stories.

Are you a Japanese purist?

Fleetway is cool and I liked the Boom show, and I liked Robotnik better than Eggman as a name.

I heard that some Japanese fans actually liked the FF’s though...

And more power to them. Again, Red Dwarf USA does a lot to shit on what made the UK version so good but I respect what it tried to do. Again, even I like the FF’s to an extent.

Why did you write this all out?

Seeing all this Rally for Sally has brought out all the insane people who shout at SOJ for being gits for not respecting the American canon despite the American canon being born from a disrespect to the Japanese creators.

What about IDW?

Ironically I actually liked Reboot more but also I was younger when I read them.

What do you think of Tangle and Whisper getting in?

I need to read more of IDW but they’re good enough. As for getting in the games, these designs were vetted and passed through SOJ first and the comic is overseen by them. On top of this, T+W don’t come from a place of SOA taking the mick.

But Sega has used these characters before and ESTABLISHED this as canon why are they changing it now-

I see this a lot, usually with certain people. Dobson’s a good example of why this is stupid. When the Japanese revert changes made to characters like Mario/Zelda/Samus by the West, they didn’t radically change their personalities, they just reset them to what Japan intended.

Japan never intended for the FF’s, the three heavily contrasting cartoons and Knuckles is Jesus Christ Superstar.

They just reverted him back to the sole guy on Angel Island.

Do you think Sally should get in to Sonic Dash?

No more than I think Tekno or Sonia does. They’re old, irrelevant, gone. If they do get brought in for a cameo I’d be happy enough, I like dumb nods to non-canon things.

However, there are crazy people out there and you give them an inch and they’ll take a mile. Best to leave it.

Hotel?

[fanbun]

(previous part - 21)

[HERE IS THE BORING PART WHERE WE TELL YOU HOW IT ALL HAPPENED AND THANK EVERYONE AND STUFF]

We started this project quite a long time ago, around the beginning of the year 2000 with me, Sibot, and Felix Laband before the whole max normal thing got started, but then i had to fight with Roach and Fletcher (which was kind of like my fault) and i said i didn’t want to speak to them again. Then I got bored with the max normal project because it didn’t accomodate my need to make new songs all the time, plus i had just met Markus Wormstorm who is the only person who makes music as fast as me. Then I phoned Fletcher and said sorry for being a dick and he said it’s ok, then i asked him if he still wanted to work with me and he said ...mmm, ok... so we started recording again (i had said sorry to Felix a little while before that.) Me and Si were a little scared to leave our comfort zone, but we were both really happy to be living in Cape Town and working on a skill-oriented album, so we didn’t really mind being poor for a year and starting from scratch again. Me and Markus went into Tim Parrs studio and finished recording all the vocals in three days because of our incredible pre-production ability. Then Markus deleted the whole album on the last day by mistake... well, he said he did it on purpose because he thought I could do better, but nobody really believed him. So we re-recorded the album but then we went into this whole lengthy, unexpected process (capetown is wierd like that) which involved meeting a whole bunch of new artists who shared similar visions to us, working harder than any of us have worked in our whole lives, and kind of like stepping back and letting go a bit as this constructus thing started growing into its own creature. Anica the Snufling came to join us on vocals as well as Rick Flare, Darrel, Michelle, Johnny Stokes, Mr Rockadopolis, and Shabang. Then i met a truly strange character called Nikhil Singh who moved in with me and drew the beautiful comic which follows this. Nik also played the guitar on ‘hot-water’ as well as with my head which was in need of a little tampering at the time. Risk hit us with the idea for our constructus icon (the robot throwing up the ball)... Jan taught me these cool excercizes you can do on a jungle-gym, Devin helped me invent the BLOOD-NOSE PUSSY-BOY story (and might even help me out with it more, if i’m lucky)... Berlin East stole my underpants and wore them ontop of his pants to this one party, Si got a final scratch which he is very happy with, and we all started working on our live show because we didn’t rehearse properly for our first shows and our performances were pretty kak... but we’ve been working real hard and we like really, really good now. I also made this other song which I love more than anything with my friend Dan Roberts called ‘Scum Deluxe’ which is actually a present for my other friend Lux Janssen, but some of the lads from our camp were a little nervous of putting a country song on the album so i’m going to put it out with Alien on Chameleon Records (on ‘MY FAVORITE SONGS AT THE MOMENT’ project). Also we couldn’t fit the entire saga on one cd so we decided to put them on our web-sight so that people can download them for free and make their own double cd. You can also download our wonderful little motivational movie called: HOW TO BECOME A BETTER PERSON THE MUSICAL for free off our site plus a whole lot of other nifty this’ and thats’. Inca has been building a visual library of our constructus imagery that she edits live behind us when we perform so that the show expands into an entirely infinite virtual realm. Also all the music videos and movies we making are intricately laced to the plot so that, in about a year or so from now, you’ll be able to watch them all together like one of those cool, old-fashioned musicals. If anyone asks you what kind of music we make you must say that it’s called BOOM BAM, cos it’s new and we don’t really like hip-hop anymore cos it’s dumb. We feel that the spirit the art movement we represent needs a name that represents it properly, so there you have it: BOOM BAM. If anyone asks you what BOOM BAM is you can say that it’s computer game music. BOOM BAM artists (or programmers) create their own original alternate reality’s complete with their own characters and sound-tracks. The programmers assume a more background role while their characters become the celebrities. Daniel Levi introduced me to Random Boy and Kidtronic a long time ago (as well as inventing Kidtronic’s handwriting and being a huge inspiration to this whole project.) He’s going to be doing a whole lot of stuff with us which i’m really happy about cos Daniel is really clever and is also one of the illest directors alive on Earth as well as one of my favorite people ever. Magdeline and Timon played violin on the track he’s going to be making a video for soon called V. Marc Lottering has been looking after me the whole year, being my friend and also making sure i’m not hungry... dankie dankie dankie maneer, you have been the shark-net in my paddling pool... ...the fuel in my flame-thrower, the mushy stuff in my tinkie. William Shatner also helped me out beautifully using her advanced therapeutic techniques and so i’d like to say thankyou honey, you the shit xxx. African Dope Records are the coolest label i could have ever possibly dreamed to work with, plus they pretend not to notice when i steal fruit and veggies from their entrance hall. Roach is my daddy, i love him more than he knows. Heather looks after us so so nicely and Ian says wierd, clever stuff the whole time that i sometimes don’t always understand right away, which i dig. Also we thank Bell Roberts for recognizing what we doing and backing our shit... Maude, Johan, Cedwax and Benwar for looking after us so nicely in France and sparking our little international expansion... and Fletcher, Inca and Si thanks for the best time in the world ever. Maria, thankyou for being such a darling and for activating Metatron One. Also to my man Fungus the mutated lung for taking me out, giving birth to Johnny Stokes and for being so fuckin ill and Ginny Grindith for being so fuck you (the space between words is very beautiful man) Anwar, Jo#an, Turbeou Jones, the lovely lady Rosalux and everyone else who worked on HOW TO BECOME A BETTER PERSON - episode one... thankyou so much, we got lots of stuff to do now ...Jill for being written in our future Kriek for your entirely harmonic vibrational frequency. Brendan and Stephan from Session magazine for keeping this whole independent thing strong... and Clint, you can use any of my music for anything, whenever... you the motherfuckin man homie. Godessa and Squatter Comp for bringing it like you do. Anica says I have to say thankyou to her three times, so thankyou Anica for gracing us with your existence... all hail the voodoo-boogie shake-down queen.. thankyou so much for being such a brat, and thankyou for buying me this notepad i’m writing all this stuff in <3 ...Duncan, hello... thanks for making sure we always have vegetarian food on the planes, and for organizing our shit and for being able to handle me, here we go sir. Also we would like to thank The Venerable Emperor Of The Known Universe for establishing our communicative link with The Jellyfish. And to Si and Dunc’s mom and dad for being so nice to us and believing in us. And Markus and Anri’s parents, Rosa, Piet, Ben and Elna for raising their kids so well. And to Andrew and Goody for telling us we so ill. Mama, Boo, Dyl, and the Debsta, love you, love you, love you, love you for ever and ever and ever and ever, amen. And to other Andrew who won’t let me start an informative lifestyle magazine with his face on the cover called Andrew... punk, thanks for breathing life into our jellyfish. And Mark and Sean for all the good times and for all the music we made together and to Al my pal for turbo-charging my career... i’m glad we friends again. Ay rob, sick mix of ‘Body-snatchers’ (comming out soon) ta mister. Also Felix Laband, Sibot, and Markus Wormstorm are my favorite artists in the whole world, and Anica is my favorite vocalist ever and i know them. The Lensta’s not so bad himself but if he dyes my poodle pink one more time i’m going to tell his mom about the incedent with the old blind guy. Yo petru, thanks for being so cool... Yo Si, thanks for lending me that g and for having my back. Alien, you better quit with the late night pervert calls. My friend Bernie gave me the idea for The Ambrosial Hours. Markus Wormstorm let me stay at his house for the last month of this project which was very nice of him. He also engineered and mixed most of this album (even the songs he didn’t make, much to his dissaproval) so he’s gonna get a real nice birthday present from me for his 21st in december. (sorry, i have to interrupt myself here, i just finished the nicest song ever with Len called Touch The Sky... Cher says we excellent...) Anyway, Fletcher’s been the illest, most intuitive cat to work with. He did a whole lot of gorgeous soundscaping on this album, as well as final mixing and mastering. Sibot is Jimmy Hendrix on the decks... he has advanced beyond all competition as usual. Inca is often the invisible pulse that holds this whole sucker together and has been an absolute sweetheart through and through in everything she does. She has also rented her flat out to me for a very reasonable price. Oh ja, also... we did 90% of this album in our bedrooms and we could have done it all in our bedrooms but Tim’s got such nice, old analogue equipment to do vocal stuff and final touches through, plus he’s the nicest person in the world, so we couldn’t help but work with him. We also want to point out the fact that there has been no corporate assistance whatsoever on this project and that anyone can do this with low-fi pc equipment, some pirate software and a little love. Obviously we now going to go through some corporate channels to hit as many humans as possible, but we have complete creative control and they do what we say. We would like everyone who is interested in creating art for a living to follow our example. There is no excuse for not being able to make it because of the system and everything. The system is eating it’s own tail... we just helping to stuff it further down it’s throat, while dancing around jubilously with it’s entrails around our necks (Markus made me put that last bit in.) Love is entirely unpalatable to these parasites that govern this realm and they feed off your fear, so please would everybody be so kind as to remove their food supply and act like you know so we can exterminate these poor lost fucks.

metatron one_out.

(p.s. i got the name Snufflegruff and the Bazooka-Nuker concept from Alan Moore’s D.R. and Quinch, who Random Boy is kind of obsessed with and i read the Magic Ear story in this children’s book while walking through a shopping mall one day... my version is just an adoption. Markus Wormstorm wrote most parts of this story which involve Kidtronic, which he says are the most important parts in the whole saga. Also Julia Clark is the loveliest girl ever. we got big stuff comming. My little brother Lee told me ‘the two giraffes in a bar joke’ and Markus made up ‘the Boys 2 Men thing’ that happened while Kidtronic was interacting with an old-fashioned, alternate reality. But other than that me, Sibot, Markus and Anica invented this whole thing all on our own and we are very proud of ourselves because of it.)

(END)