#anyway this was fun!! thank u lise

[probayern]

tagged by lise @acrazybayernfan who came up with this and also @thommi-tomate and @miasanmuller 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

what are your top 10 most memorable Bayern matches?

1. Bayern 6-0 Schalke (2023): i have to include this because i was there and it was very very special, will never forget it <3 thomas opening the scoring and then us winning 6-0 in the middle of one of our worst stretches that i've ever seen... special.

2. 8-2, i mean, come on. that was also RIGHT as i was starting to watch live regularly again after not being able to as much for a few years and it really drew me fully back in

3. 2012 ucl final. absolutely devastating. that was right around when i first got into bayern and i still don't like to think about it

4. not one match, but the 7-0 win over barca in 2013. it was impossible for me to watch bayern live in the ucl at that time (as i was in school) but i love those matches i love rewatching them

5. bayern 4-0 stuttgart (2021) this is a completely random one but i will never ever forget it, phonzy getting the red in like the 10th minute and then us scoring 4 goals. right around when i started posting on bayernblr <3 tail end of the hansi era, which was flawed but still probably my favorite recent era to watch, his football with us was so much fun

6. bayern 5-1 wolfsburg (2015) i mean. 5 goals 9 minutes. incredible incredible scenes. will never get old.

7. villarreal 1-0 bayern (2022) i think there are a lot of matches you can point to in the past few years and be like that's where we went wrong, and the psg match the previous year also probably deserves to be on this list, but this one really, really hurt. i think you all know that i think we've not been all that good since 2021 but this one... we should've won. we should have gone to the semis that year. flaws and all. i think a lot of things could have been different if we had won this match.

8. köln 1-2 bayern (2023) very very recent but. one of the most insane football viewing experiences i've ever had. i will never forget how i felt when jamal scored that goal. my heartrate did something absolutely insane that day

9. 2013 ucl final: served my interests soooo much on so many levels. i dream of the day we get an all german final again. That robben goal (i miss him). the high of getting revenge for the previous year. they just don't give us narratives like that anymore

10. gladbach 0-5 bayern (2021) i mean. this was insanity. this was the first time i was like ohhh there is a mentality hole in this team and that is a Problem. set the scene for a lot of the issues of the nagelsmann era. hopefully we are coming out of that a bit? still. that complete and utter collapse was something

i feel like everyone has been tagged but!! i'll tag @moosiala @goretzkas @antibayern @gxtzeizm @fabioquartararhoe and @musialas

[daegalfangirl]

love maze ; huang renjun

❝ oh my god! you're cute. ❞

you've been popularly known as a bitch, and you agree. that's not the issue here. you enjoy messing around with boys for quite a while, their heart in your hands. you never expected for it to go the other way when you bump into a boy at the corn maze. yep, and it gets worse when you find out you're not the only girl head over heels for him. you're becoming a better person, but karma was bound to strike for what you've done in the past. maybe it's about time you understand how it really feels.

└> PAIRING; renjun x fem!reader

└> FEATURES; all the female main characters from the other stories + all of dream + jaehyun

└> WARNINGS; swearing, reader is a bitch (mostly towards men), sex jokes, mentions of infidelity, both reader and renjun are flawed in the romance field

└> STATUS; completed ✔️

└> AUTHORS NOTE; okay so they meet at a corn maze and stuff but i literally have never been to a corn maze in my fucking life so if it's different from how it normally is IM SORRY i'm just assuming it's like a normal maze. removed the tags of some people that i am aware that are minors because there is no explicit sex scenes between anyone but the reader is implied to be on the sexually active side with other men SOOOO ya. i cant check every single one of you though so if you are a minor please advise me so that i can remove you from the taglist.

└> SCHEDULE; monday, wednesday, and friday whenever i feel like it but usually around 8pm

└> TAGLIST; @sunflowerhae @neoteez01 @ashesandfanfics @cacaubs @dayandnighthyuck @neokats @furryllamas @eggoyu @blossom-rea @scented-morker @loveleejn @sunshine-skz @vantxx95 @seolrose @legbouk @mark-wife-renjun-whore @yunoshandholder @heetrbl @amindpalaceofmyown @jaeminslut @girlfiendsss @heyitsbreeeeee @yo-dreamrush @mrkleelvr @yvtaverse @jiye0n0 @flower-lise @thejungjaehyun @todorokiskitten @rynshyuckies @hiraarri @tacojisung @multihoe-net @b1awhore @squiishymeow @bbanggami @maddypool31 @aminihhj @meltinghershey @treasuretaeil @markhyuckgotmyback @yunhodeobi @resceluwu @simplicitysbabe @beegobuzzzz @faiirybread @ihaveacheseeadiction @hae06 @samsemsame @astereads + more but i hit max mentions 😭

└> COULDN'T TAG; @kyuwoyo @alltothelee @mqrkfrl @athuwu @hirouiii @xiaoflwr @hyungwinning @lookloony

want to be added to the taglist? click here!

m.list to "from the seasons, to us" (my smau series)

0.5 | intro: the girls

1 | wrong idea

2 | I CAN EXPLAIN

3 | 🥺🥺🥺

4 | bella

5 | mine

6 | what do we do

7 | FUCK YOU

8 | trying

9 | Omg! suddenly i am too busy

10 | NVM EGO SHATTERED

11 | "bad"

12 | YOUR fault

13 | twins

14 | i had fun

15 | true, True, TRUE

16 | filler bff

17 | let's talk

18 | best friend

19 | people like her

20 | thank you i know i'll need it

21 | (pending) character development

22 | sacrifices for the ones we love

23 | poor jisung

24 | "pity"

25 | i AM emily cooper

26 | the other woman

27 | rights and wrongs

28 | boyfriend & girlfriend

29 | oops sorry... anyways im horny

30 | woah!

31 | the things i do for my pookiebear

32 | i like the way you think

33 | meddling

34 | 4 me, 4 u

35 | forever

epilogue

[child-of-hurin]

hello hello love your blog aa! wondering about fav dostoyevsky books and characters and WHYY do you you like them!! thank you <3

Aaaaegdhrg This message threw me down into a rabbit hole of thoughts... Anyway thank you 🙈🙈 I’m glad u enjoy this… assortment of…. Posts… And thanks for the question 

This is such a difficult question because you put it in the plural. I can easily say my favorite book of his, singular, is The Brothers Karamazov, just because it’s the one I’ve reread the most, the one I think about the most, the scenes are both more memorable and more touching to me. The other novels I think I like equally? (Though IDK if I’ll ever find myself wanting to reread the Demons)

This is how I can best explain my personal feelings about how these novels compare to each other:

I haven’t read either the Demons or Crime&P in a while, though, so I’m relying entirely on memory here! But also with the addendum that none of these works are really dry, structured or un-gutsy: I have only read the Demons once, but I occasionally reread the looooong scene with Maria Ignatievna giving birth because I think it’s so genuinely touching?? I even made my wife read it completely out of context lmao 😬 So, number one favorite thing about Dosto in general is that I think there’s a lot of guts in it, a lot of the author letting the characters take the story, and that’s why we get pages and pages of monologue, because all of these characters are to the point of bursting. We meet them when they’re so ripe that just poking a little too hard breaks the skin. I had a friend who told me once she was annoyed by how hysterical Dosto’s female characters were in The Brothers Karamazov: that struck me as odd, because I think all his characters of all genders are hysterical at all times. Those are never books about sane people doing sane things in a sane way. Which ofc I love :)

I don’t have the vocabulary to talk about this in English, but I’m constantly thinking about what is the ideal amount of control an artist ought to have over their own work. I love this topic and I can talk about it for days; it’s the thing that comes trickling through the craft that I think is fascinating and that makes an artwork truly brilliant; it’s something about the momentary ego death that being very invested in the crafting of a work brings sometimes, and how that creates a work that is able to reproduce that momentary ego death on the perceiver as well… I have said this before, but I much much much rather prefer works that are messy or have execution problems, but where you can see the artist truly let themselves go, let the characters and story develop as if alive. That’s what I mean when I say the work has “guts”. I hate moral tales lol.

In that sense, I think my ‘spectrum’ illustration  makes sense to me because the Idiot truly was, according to the man himself, an experimental work where he did not plan the ending beforehand and just gave the characters free reign to go bonkers, and that’s why the last chapter is literally nightmare fuel… the Demons, by contrast, has a more organized structure and you can see the author knew exactly where he wanted to arrive (and it also ends with nightmare fuel…). But even when he’s planning and designing, he’s too good to break his own story, shove his hand inside the narrative and artificially relocate the pieces in order to better suit his conscience, so it always stays in the realm of allegory and never decays into metaphor :D I also like how he sets a scene, and I don’t think it’s by accident that when I talk about these books, I immediately recall it in terms of scenes more than in terms of themes or characters. That’s not necessarily how I function with novels in general, so that’s also something I appreciate in his works. 

One thing I really like and that I feel a little shy to talk about, due to not having the vocabulary to do it very well, is how many relationships he depicts where one part (normally the man) adores the other (normally the woman) to the point of self-degradation; a love that creates a worshipful distance that, ultimately, is exactly what destroys the relationship… in the Idiot, for example, Nastasya doesn’t want a master and doesn’t want a slave, but the men she loves and who love her can’t really offer anything else. Same with  Dmitri and Grushenka and Katya and Ivan, same with Alyosha and whatever is it he has with Lise, in that he puts himself too differently human from her to be properly loved; in fact I think the reason the main couple of Crime and Punishment work is because they wrestle with this a bit, but Rodka believes in redemption, and his story with Sofia is a story of becoming, together… sorry wait this makes me really emotional 🤧

For the novellas and shorter books… I haven’t read most of them but I did have more fun with the bleaker ones…  Notes from the Underground is simply too good, I remember calling my friend to read him entire passages out loud while I was reading it; A Gambler is SUCH A DOWNER but the part where the protag tells Polina that “the mere sound of the rustle of her skirts on the stairs makes him want to hurl himself to the ground and bite his hands” or something along these lines altered my brain chemistry forever, and the Eternal Husband is like... Really a book without a single likeable character, and yet I enjoyed myself immensely while reading it lmao.

Fave characters, ULTRA HARD question bc I tend to like more their interactions than them themselves as concepts, but:

Crime and punishment: Dunia, Rodka, Sofia, Katerina the widow

The brothers karamazov: The three brothers (sorry Smerdiakov), Katya, Grusha, Lise 

The idiot: NASTASYA FILIPPOVNA

The demons: Shatov & wife

[midnight-mismanagement]

A (If Anything, It Was Unexpected), F, U for the ask meme. Thank you!

Ah, thank you for the ask, @shywalkers  :) You have made my inbox very much less empty xD Anyway, uh, here we go:

A: How did you come up with the title to (If Anything, It Was Unexpected): 

Ahaha, uhhh, disclaimer: coming up with titles is the bane of my existence, and I consider myself to be pretty…pretty awful at it. This one took a while and I still don’t know if it’s any good but, heh, it is what my brain wanted I guess. So, I sort of came up with it because Loki is basically…unpredictable. To other characters, at least. In this fic he’s sort of…unhappily doing some self-sacrifice stuff, begrudgingly cooperating, and… basically surprising himself with his actions, as well as all the other characters, who pretty much expect the worst from him, (this includes Loki). So, whenever other characters seem to be affected by his actions ( i.e. the itty bit of Heimdall’s development I’ve been working on) Loki is like: ?????? He doesn’t expect anything he ever does to actually change the opinions of the people around him, he doesn’t expect anyone to actually care about him or think about going back for him (why would they, he’s a monster, isn’t he?) But every time they do…it’s unexpected. For him. And, as we saw in IW, and basically in TDW…Loki believes his death is basically expected. It’s inevitable. He’s been living on borrowed time since Odin picked him up on Jotunheim. He’s the monster in the story who has to eventually be slain, and to die for Thor, for his people, well, it’s not like he wants to, but if he didn’t….if he lived instead, well, that’s just...unthinkable. 

TL;DR: Everything Loki does is unexpected to the other characters who expect the worst from him (including himself), and every time the other characters respond more positively to him in light of his actions, he is completely confused and distrustful of it because of So Many Angsty Reasons. And…that’s basically what I wanted to explore throughout this fic. Hope this sort of makes sense…

Even More TL;DR: Even though I don’t think I’m a suspenseful writer who surprises readers at all, all the characters are surprising each other and it’s sad.

Or Alternatively: My updates are so sporadic, every time I post a new chapter, it’s unexpected. Specifically to me. I need to…I need to get better at this……

F: Share a snippet from one of your favourite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

Agh, I’m not…I’m not generally proud of any of my……stuff, but I guess, uh…this…?

If Anything, It Was Unexpected - Chapter 1

“And mother-?” The words broke on his tongue, and Loki wished he were not under Odin’s scrutiny.

“She misses you,” Odin said quietly, gently, and Loki couldn’t meet his gaze, “she says she is proud, and only regrets she could not be here herself.”

Something cold wrapped its icy fingers around Loki’s heart, and squeezed.

“I…” Loki choked, but forced the words from his lips, fighting against the sob threatening to tear from his throat, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please tell her I’m sorry. ”

And, same chapter:

“You-” Loki gulped, blinking furiously as Odin wiped away the last of his tears, “you left us. You lied, ” he couldn’t bite his tongue, couldn’t hold it all back, “you left us with a sister you threw away and the fires of Ragnarok. ” Loki gasped, and clenched his teeth against a sob. Because that’s what you do with things that embarrass you. That are wrong. You imprison them, lock them away to be forgotten. “You lie, you’ve always lied, and they called me the God of Lies.”

You tell him, Loki. You tell him. (I like them because they make me sad (what does that say about me), but also, the second one is…yeah. Odin is compliqué, but…this spiel, I feel, is accurate, and I’m happy I gave Loki the chance to say it.)

U: Share three of your favourite fic writers and why you like them so much.

Only…only three?? O-okay….

1. Lise, or to find her on tumblr, @veliseraptor - all her stuff is amazing, she has Loki characterization (and whumping) down to an art form. I admire all her stuff. Life in Reverse is probably my favourite loki fic ever, and if you haven’t read her stuff yet, please give it a whirl. 

2. bereft-of-frogs, or @bereft-of-frogs - love all her stuff too, more Loki fic, beautiful characterization, please check her out, you will not be disappointed. pain, and other human sensations , as well as its sequel and side fics, have a special place in my heart.

3. GalaxyThreads  - I don’t know if they have a tumblr, but all their stuff is amazing, I particularly love Append (exploration of Loki, Thor and Hela if they grew up together) it’s honestly beautiful, and I believe it has a sequel. Please check her out on Ao3.

And there are so so many others I want to list, but I don’t know if I should tag them all?? I don’t know if I should be tagging anyone? I don’t want to annoy anyone, I don’t know what proper tumblr etiquette is, but this way, whoever reads this can find their blog and subsequently their stuff as quickly as possible?? (I’m sorry, I will edit this if I’ve tagged anyone who doesn’t want to be, I…still don’t know what I’m doing…) And if you want to know of more people, just ask, and let me know if I’m allowed to tag them...?

Anyway, that’s it, thank you so much for the ask, this was fun, and I hope you have yourself a great day :)

fanfic ask

[veliseraptor]

lise my good bitch, you did That! all the boys I've know was so hot my god, i think i'll definitely keep coming back to read it for the next few months or so. have i told u that i live for the way u write steve and loki's sexual dynamics? the kink negotiation, the actual kinky stuff, the versatility and variety, and that u write(or at least i read it that way idk)loki's masochism *partially* as an indirect form of self-harm that loki partakes in. i live for it sis, i liiiiive!

thank you very much! 

I love writing their sex life, honestly, there’s just...it’s very dynamic and fun to play around with. and...relatively healthy, honestly, which is fresh for me as far as writing Loki’s sexual relationships goes

(and general relationships, lbr)

but yeah, you’re not wrong about Loki’s masochism being partly that...indirect kind of self-harm, which Steve is onto and has been for a while, and Loki’s mostly is good about not bringing into things with Steve. he tries, anyway, though I still think a lot of it lurks there under the surface. 

it’s a very open question about whether Loki even at this point has the ability to have a healthy relationship with his masochistic tendencies.

[penzyroamin]

#1, #37, & #40 For the musical theater ask thing!

thank u for asking these!!!!!

1. favorite guilty pleasure musical?

uhhh it’s not a typical guilty pleasure but i HATE telling people that “floyd collins” is in my top favorites because it just makes me sound WILDLY pretentious. like oh, yeah, i like newsies, but i like this folk/bluegrass musical that ran off broadway for 25 performances before closing more

37. musical movie you enjoy?

meet me in st louis!!!!!!!! the way “the trolley song” is done never fails to fill my brain with serotonin. also i lowkey love the les mis movie. russel crowe’s singing is. regrettable which is sad bc i think he ACTED javert well, he just... can’t sing. which sucks because javert has some of the most iconic parts in Anything Ever

40. you hate (trope/characteristic/plot point) but (show) is the exception

i hate guys pestering girls into liking them, but aaip (the musical) is the exception! mainly because jerry isn’t really pestering lise into liking him??? they both already know that they like each other, and she makes it pretty evident immediately that she’s held back by her circumstances rather than disliking him. also like..... dude when everyone’s dancing in “beginner’s luck” and lise is staring out at all of them and giggling and smiling my whole heart melts. it’s also noteworthy that lise is NEVER afraid of jerry-- the only one of the trio that she’s ever afraid of is henri, and she’s less afraid of HIM than she is of him finding out that she’s in love with jerry. 

(holy shit, y’all, max von essen and leanne cope OWN the “something wonderful has happened” bit. complete uneasiness on lise’s side because she’s afraid of him knowing, a discomfort with their relationship on henri’s side that leaks through into what Should feel like sweet banter being just a little Off.. it only takes three seconds to perfectly illustrate how they’re both desperately trying to pretend that things are normal and that they romantically love each other)

anyways. the combo of good writing, really fun and well-directed scenes, and EXCELLENT performances from robbie fairchild and leanne cope make aaip the exception to my general rule because it... well, it doesn’t really fit the classification in the first place. lise already likes jerry, she just needs to be shown some three-brain-cell shenanigans to not worry about her other life

anyways!!!!!! that went into me rambling about aaip. thank u for asking these!!! they’re a lot of fun fsjdhsjgds (psst @ everyone else... if u want to see some more rambles about stuff i like... ask me musical questions from the list i just rbed please)