#anyway thanks to strattera i almost never have meltdowns anymore so they feel a million times worse when i do 🙃

[thirddeadlysin]

executive dysfunction, altered time perception, shitty recall alternating with a hyperspecific and persistent memory for things other people have forgotten, object impermanence, and rejection sensitive dysphoria are all pretty debilitating and embarrassing to various degrees but the absolute worst symptom/comorbidity of my adhd is the meltdown. just total fucking tantrum mode over things no one else understands why they triggered me into one because they're so inconsequential and easily brushed off at any other time but not in that exact moment. it's so childish and humiliating not to be able to control my temper because (for tonight's example) the pizza place sent an alert that they delivered ten minutes before the pizza actually showed up, an exterior door got stuck open because the wood's swollen from the nonstop rain, the world's friendliest-when-he-wants-to-be cat wouldn't stop walking two inches directly in front of me on every trip through the house trying to deal with the door and the missing pizza, and the final straw of knocking something over with my ass yet again because there's shit piled up absolutely everywhere.