#anyway stay safe out there

[methinmycoffee]

~~Spoilers (S26 E6)~~

A season finale to be remembered (forgotten). Eh, here's what I thought anyway.

Let's start with the positives:

I honestly enjoy Rick. He's funny, entertaining it's nice to see Garrison's impact on a positive influence in his life. I'll touch more on him in the negatives, but for now he's a generally good character. Me yelling "DUMP HIS ASS!" at the TV is good, because it means I am genuinely invested in this relationship. Even though I think Rick is far too good for Garrison, I don't mind that they're together. It's the new Clybe, a garbage fire reality TV couple.

Funny. Hehehe. I very much enjoyed the comparisons to like, a party addict but it's just Trump and he's getting a bunch of people to rally with him. Especially the scene in the bathroom where it’s like two guys doin’ it but they’re just screaming about America.

Stan is a nerd, but in a fun way. Good for him. A little out of left field, but good for him.

I enjoyed the parallel to Randy and Garrison's relationship. Especially at the end, when they reveal that Randy needs Sharon like Garrison needs Rick. Even though it's not healthy or fun for Sharon and Rick to deal with their partners, they're sort of stuck babysitting man-children they feel responsible for. Deep, but sort of fun and not as serious as I'm making it sound.

Let's middle with the negatives (idk man):

I DO NOT LIKE RANDY! Why did they do that to him? Honestly my Quest For Rankings(tm) has made me a little sad because I miss the old Randy. Since when is he an asshole with little regard for Stan's goings on? Since when is he a party guy who only cares about tits and booze and really hates Sharon and Shelly? Since he started to suck, around the time of season 20 but really going in full swing around season 22. This Randy was especially insufferable, and I do not enjoy him and Stan having a dumpster fire relationship.

Style feel divorced now. Matt Stone's characters had zero lines in this episode, so idk what's up with that, but Stan got to pick one person to play with all spring break and he chose To(l)k(i)en? Not in my canon. Seriously, I feel like this section should be longer because I’m so mad. I don’t like the change. I don’t think To(l)k(i)en doesn’t have a place in the show, but it’s not as the new Kyle.

We don’t need another bad relationship. Idk, I like Rick, but I think that maybe instead of constantly creating identical, toxic relationships where characters who used* to be fun become angry and bitter just like the aging writing staff. Give us some Stendy resolution. Give us a nice Sharon and Randy (shandy? Handy?) episode. Make a Creek episode at all. I know I complement the parallels between Garrison and Randy’s relationships, and it works well for in individual episode but imo it’s a little bit too much for every couple to constantly hate each other now. Matt and Trey must be having trouble in paradise.

*note: this is very in character for Garrison, actually. But maybe just set all that aside for a while and give us a good old fashioned Stan and his current lover (Kyle, Wendy, To(l)k(i)en even) against a clear evil without an agenda. Throw in Cartman and Kenny too.

And We’ll end with some Nitpicking:

This is honestly our season finale? This is it? A pretty decent Garrison plot and a shitty Randy plot? No main four classic adventure? No check-in for Cartman and his regular house? No hard reset away from Stolkien and back towards Style or away from Tregridy? Okay. We’ll see how the Paramount specials pan-out then.

I’m so tired, man.

The house party was a weird thing that came out of no where. Like, Randy threw water on a stripper that he hired to harass his son and his “friend”, and then the pimp(?) (not really sure, but I don’t think that’s how strippers work) was like “I’ll shoot you” so Randy said “I have drugs in the barn” and then Andrew Tate(?) was like “Okay let’s get hammered then.” And then he invited everyone he knew to a random weed farm in rural Colorado and they had a party? K.

A final thought:

I don’t usually do this. But I feel like this over-analysis was a little meaner than I usually am with these. So I’m going to put this out there: I don’t mind this episode. (5/10). It’s not evil. It didn’t kill my first born. I think Garrison’s plot was solid and in line with his character. I am just tired of toxic relationships. I don’t think this is specifically on Garrison, in fact I think the problem is more with Stendy and Shandy or whatever. I don’t like that Randy sucks now, and I didn’t like his half-assed “boys should be boys” attitude. I believe he can be done correctly, but something different needs to be done.

Also I don’t hate To(l)k(i)en, I’m mostly just mad at what’s been done to the show, and his shift to Stan’s best friend is part of it. I don’t mind Stolkien either, I’m not opposed to it, I just personal don’t think that To(l)k(i)en is that interesting and I miss the before times.

This is a call to the South Park team! You can be good. You can do good. You can write good (well). I have faith in you. If I was the only one who saw these problems, then the issue would lie more with me, but I’m not and I don’t think it is. But I have Faith! DikinBaus was good! Cupid Ye was good! Deep Learning was good! You can do some Deep Learning yourself and process what about those episodes worked, and we can get some kickass specials this summer. I believe in you! <3

[sabanmoon]

people literally posting porn on my dash. hey alright.

[pitske]

queer people?

[eff-plays]

"Astarion is actually so masculine and wants to protect and provide for Tav! He's actually really strong physically and can throw Tav around! And also he's always on top so he's clearly masculine! And him being with women means he gets an extra special vampire treat ;)"

"Astarion is such a bratty effeminate twink who complains about his nails and cares too much about his appearance! His voice and movements are sooo campy! I simply can't imagine him with a woman, he's sooo gay-coded, he's simply made to be a bratty bottom."

[finemealprompt]

DP x DC Prompt #42

Billy's pretty pleased with his ability to keep his secret identity a secret from the League. The only ones who might know are Batman and his crew, but that was to be expected.

So, he's a little surprised when he spots a new hero who has joined Justice League: Dark who looks a lot like his cousin. Like, a lot a lot. Give him black hair and blue eyes, and that's Danny ... Oh holy shit Phantom's Danny! When did Danny become a ghost?

Billy hopes Danny won't tattletale to his mom. That'd be a nightmare.

[dreamingpartone]

at that place we sat together today again, I'll go to where you're going

[spookythesillyfella]

GET OUT OF MY HEAD . GET OUT OF MY HEAD . GET OUT OF MY HEAD . GET OUT OF MY HEAD . GET OUT O

★ [ original image under cut]

[very-poorly-drawn-tgcf]

Happy Pride month!

Next episode soon, apologies for the delays!

[salt-n-salt]

Shane's eyebrows get bigger with every drawing,,,, /pos

dw u can put /neg at the end it is an ILLNESS that i am CONSUMED by. the shane eyebrow growing parasite is already inside me. like here’s one of my first Shane drawings from like june or smth:

and then this is how i draw him now:

im SICK !

[taiyami]

Would you draw joey wheeler? :)

Anything your heart desires .... Joey currently desires a Nathan's city-style dog and I'm right there with him.

[moonkhao]

hi.

[iloveacronix]

Most normal Krux and Acronix conversation💀💀💀

@get-acronixed-meme

[imogenkol]

KINCADE PACK 🐺 (original works) — “The name goes back centuries, and all Miranda cares about is making sure it lasts for many more”

[template by @tommyarashikage]

tag list (ask to be added or removed!): @adelaidedrubman @florbelles @simonxriley @voidika @kyberinfinitygems @voidbuggg @inafieldofdaisies @statichvm @socially-awkward-skeleton @aceghosts @carlosoliveiraa @risingsh0t @unholymilf @thedeadthree @cassietrn @jackiesarch @a-treides @shellibisshe @loriane-elmuerto @katsigian @captastra @simplegenius042 @theelderhazelnut @g0dspeeed @leviiackrman @strangefable @jacobseed

[sanchoyo]

ok yeah the comic was good but the lack of ANY danielle was VERY funny to me. I know they were juggling a lot of characters but no quick mention of her or glimpse is like. is she still just 12 and homeless traveling the world completely alone, probably not going to school still. wdym vlad is taking dark danny in while he alrEADY HAS A CANONICAL DAUGHTER HES NEGLECTING???? SHES jUST. SHES OUT THERE BRO. and I 100% understand her not wanting to live with him after how he treated her, but shes not even living with the fentons?? she was NO WHERE TO BE SEEN

just. very funny. hope some fanfics remedy this 💀

[glitchdollmemoria]

do people who disregard photosensitivity realize that seizures can fucking kill or do they just not care. do people not realize that their "aesthetic" "cool" flashing lights that happen without SUFFICIENT warning... are fucking capable of killing people. i dont even care if i sound pissy right now because i am pissy, im sick of feeling like myself and others with epilepsy arent even afforded the right to be an afterthought to most people. im not even photosensitive but ffs this shit makes me so angry.

seizures themselves can be deadly if they go on too long, theyre essentially electrical overloads in the brain, you know, that organ that controls the entire rest of the body? and seizures can result in injuries or death from falls. from choking on our own vomit. from drowning in our own bathtubs, if we think we might be safe to bathe and then get proven wrong. maybe someone just wanted to watch a video or movie while they took a spa day.

did you know that epileptics are more likely to die younger than those without epilepsy, with all those risks and more? and have you heard of SUDEP? sudden unexpected death in epilepsy, death without a known cause, a rare but very real possibility for us. it kills approximately 1 in 1000 epileptics a year, if not more since it may not be accurately tracked. thats thousands of us dead a year. we do not need you to add to our death rates.

"all these things are known risks, epileptics just have to be more careful-" epileptic people should not have to be on constant fucking high alert. how about instead, people just learn to give a shit about life threatening disabilities? it takes so little effort to just offer a CLEAR and VERY OBVIOUS warning AHEAD OF TIME, for a SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF TIME, before your stupid flashing lights. or just dont add them at all. are they necessary? are they really necessary? would you really fucking rather photosensitive epileptics have to be constantly on guard, IMPOSSIBLY on guard, rather than you just considering their safety? nobody can anticipate every instance of unexpected flashing lights they might come across. but you, creators, are able to provide warnings, and if for any reason you arent, then hire someone else to edit the warnings in or just get rid of the fucking lights altogether.

again, my epilepsy is not photosensitive, but i will never stop being protective of my photosensitive siblings. my own life is scary enough with the form of epilepsy i have, i cannot imagine how terrifying it must be to have to maneuver through the world with photosensitivity, and i dont want careless assholes to go killing my fucking community because you dont give enough of a shit to worry epileptic people. i am pissed off and emotionally exhausted and the shit with elon musk having a flashing gif on his twitter account was the straw that broke my back today so youre getting a pissed off PSA. everyone better start doing a whole damn lot better.

link to the CDC page about SUDEP

link to the epilepsy foundation site page about seizure risks

people without epilepsy are encouraged to reblog but know that i am already angry and will not tolerate bullshit on this post. give a fuck about other peoples lives and safety or im blocking you.

[kirisaki-daichi-scenarios]

the boys as bodyguards

dedicated to absolutely no one. sure this is an asks blog - does that mean i have to actually answer them? i know i know bad admins bad admins whatcha gonna do whatcha gonna do when they come for you but i had a dream ages ago now that involved bodyguards, tsunamis, and also a shit ton of murder. don't ask. anyway, it got me pondering. and then it took literal months to write this so i figured i'd post what i've got so far, and maybe i'll update with the rest of the boys later, depending on how well this does/how much time i have

hanamiya makoto

hanamiya’s the package deal

he’s the chief advisor; he’s the doctor; he’s the bodyguard; he’s the sniper. just a right hand man in every way possible.

i mean, he’s not literally your right hand man: he’s the leader of a team, and often it’ll be one of his men there next to you at events, but he’s always supervising or coordinating or collecting intel

ie he’s dedicated to his job. he does like engineering spider’s webs after all.

having said that, he’s also an uncontrollable prick

he’s the best at giving you advice, both in terms of navigating high society and in terms of actual business advice, but is he going to give that advice without slipping in a snide comment about how you should really know all this by now? when you tell him to make sure to take a break some time, is he going to stop himself from saying “maybe if you weren’t so incredibly useless on your own, i’d be able to.”

and sure maybe he’s breaking the universal declaration of human rights with what he does to the people who dare to try harm you, but you don’t know about that

need to know basis type beat

you don’t even have access to the full floor plans of your own property, which includes a basement you’ll never know about, let alone step foot in. hanamiya keeps that information very close to his chest.

gotta make sure his employer has plausable deniability

gotta make double sure that you don’t find out about half the things he does - from the ways he sources his information, to his very dodgy organised crime links, to the number of people that have sadly lost their lives in the name of “fuck it, you’re pissing me off” - because he hates when you bang on about bullshit like “laws” and “morals”

after all, if everyone followed your beloved laws and morals, then you’d have no need for his services

as he always tells you, he’s just your pet necessary evil

yamazaki hiroshi

i reckon he only got into the bodyguard business because he spent his childhood wanting to be a samurai but, well you know, that’s not really a job opportunity anymore

what it does mean though is that he’s all about bushido: mastering his work, bravery, honesty, etc - and above all else loyalty to one’s employer

on a random thursday afternoon, he’ll tell you, completely nonchalantly, straight face, “i would die for you if that’s what it takes. on my life, i’ll always keep you safe.”

you’re staring at him like wtf and/or trying to stop yourself blushing, but he thinks that’s a completely normal thing to say cause he’s just following bushido

of course, late one night, he’ll wake up realise how weird that came across and he’ll spend the next week trying not to blush whenever you talk to him

just like the time he spent a week kicking himself after you walked in on him training, shirtless and rather sweaty, and when you told him he should take a break, he said “but i need to train so my body can be at its best for you”

again, at the time that sounded very reasonable, serious, and totally bushido to him. it’s only later that he’s freaking out in his room like why in god’s name did he say that.

but hey that’s bodyguard!yamazaki for you. a little weird, a little socially inept, but loyal to a fault

haizaki shougo

can you imagine the number of jobs that this man has lost for sleeping on the job?

he’s only got his current gig looking after you because his prices are cheaper and you were getting desperate to find someone in your budget

he’s a ...uhh… unique bodyguard? in the sense that he’ll get you out of harms way eventually, but "eventually" is the key word there

haizaki actively ignores intel that a certain location might be dangerous, because he really just wants to get into fights. sure you might get in the way occasionally, maybe even get some nasty bruises, but hey you get what you pay for.

you want a good bodyguard, save up some money, idiot.

literally the only reason he got into being a bodyguard is so he can beat people up legally (and because he got dishourably discharged from the military); he doesn’t care that much about the whole ‘protecting’ side of things

he’s also the type to ditch you the minute a better paying job comes up (possibly combat work as a mercenary). however he’s not as cold-hearted as he may seem, and he’ll happily spend a day of leave breaking into your penthouse

so that when you return in the evening, he’s there sat on an armchair, grinning smugly, “man your security’s turned to shit since i left.”

shortly followed by, “miss me?”

jason silver

jason’s the quintessential bodyguard, cause, after all, having a very muscular 6’11 man follow you everywhere you go isn’t exactly subtle

but he’s recognisable for other reasons as well.

like the fact that he’ll accompany you to formal balls, and he’ll be the only man there with an undone tie - it’s such a massive argument trying to get him to wear an appropriate suit instead of his usual hoodies and sweatpants, that can anyone blame you for not having the energy to insist he stops undoing his tie as well?

he’s also not exactly one for professionality. like you’ll be minding your business, trying to network, and suddenly you’ll hear a wolf whistle by your ear and a “wouldn’t mind me a bit of that”

“jason, that’s the ambassador to norway. we’re having her over for dinner next week, so, with all due respect, shut the fuck up. and whisper next time, for heaven’s sake! what if someone had heard you?”

“shit, is it a crime to like some nice tits in this economy?”

and when you glare at him, genuinely furious, he grins, puts his hands up, and says, “sorry, sorry. forgot you don’t like me having eyes for anyone else, boss.”

but don’t get me wrong, jason’s not all evil contra to fujimaki’s propaganda

he is an incredibly good bodyguard - those animal instincts really help him out when it comes to getting you out of a sniper’s line of sight, or saving you from a bullet, or just assessing a room for potential entry points. and he packs a mean punch if anyone tries to try something on you, a solid ko.

no one’s getting past him essentially

the only problem is that it’s incredibly difficult to thank jason for saving your life, cause the last thing he needs is an ego boost or feeling like you owe him.

“seriously jason. i don’t know how i can ever repay you.”

“usually the payslip’s enough,” he smirks, “but you know that little lady ambassador-“

unsuprisingly, he’s not invited to the dinner.