#anyway my alpha kid readings are way too boring so I feel like nobody would really be interested in them Sighhhh

[offkilterkeys]

The world isn’t ready for my alpha kid readings.

[arhvste]

❝ my assumptions based on your fav hq character ❞

these are all in good fun and not serious at all, please don’t get upset by them, my opinion doesn’t mean shit bby :,)

HINATA SHOYO

-> a soft bitch with a big heart. you want others to do well and you love positive attention. you do however, get overworked by emotion and sometimes get played because of how nice you are. judge people a little harsher and don’t be shy to put a bitch back in their place, you got this

KAGEYAMA TOBIO

-> we get it youre a bad bitch but sometimes it comes across like you’re still going through your angsty teen phase. stop that, you’ll get permenant wrinkles if you keep it up. let yourself live a little freely and don’t be shy to leave your comfort zone more often. and stop getting sad over the smallest things okay?

TSUKISHIMA KEI

-> horrible taste in men and you have a degradation kink. you wanna be called a little slut in the bedroom but would cry if you were called it anywhere else. you’re very kind people but you’re constantly putting yourself down and thinking you deserve shit over nothing. be kinder to yourself

YAMAGUCHI TADASHI

-> you’re the supportive friend people go to when they need a pick-me-up however, you let yourself get walked over from time to time and it’s not fair on you. don’t be shy to kick a bitch and show them who’s can be the alpha >:) you’re a bad bitch with a big heart and you’re academically stable

NISHINOYA YŪ

-> shush, indoor voices please! it’s okay! we know you’re here you don’t need to shout! you’re probably between 4’0-5’3 and preach personality over looks which is fine because as everyone should. you’re insecure around others and feel the need to have a bigger presence to feel more confident. it’s okay though, i think you’re really hot and you should let yourself feel more comfortable with people you actually like more often.

TANAKA RYŪNOSUKE

-> loyal as fuck and dependable. you’re the bitch people know they can come to should they ever need it. you’re popular and you own every hallway you strut through. you let the feeling of dejection get to you though and worry about how you’re perceived by the people you’re surrounded by especially if there’s a potential love interest in your orbit. calm down and be yourself more, it’s their loss if they don’t fall for you anyway.

ASAHI AZUMANE

-> stop letting people talk over you! you’re that bitch so why the hell do you let people overpower you? you’re hot and you know you’re capable but you wallow up in self doubt and get upset over nothing. remind yourself that you’re hot, loved and talented more often because you need it.

SUGAWARA KOUSHI

-> you’re deceptive and it’s not always a bad thing. you’re good at switching up your personality and probably act fake to certain people which is fair enough. you can be a bit of a bitch sometimes but you’re hot and funny so you get away with it. learn to break down your barriers a little more though because when people start seeing your act they’ll become untrusting around you.

DAICHI SAWAMURA

-> OKAY daddy issues pack it up now. no i’m kidding but you’re attracted to mentally stable people with good morals. someone that will take care of you and be there for you. try to be more self reliant and independent though.

OIKAWA TOORU

-> we know you’re hot okay? you don’t need to post thrist traps on snapchat at 2AM every night we get it! you’re a little whiny and bratty but that’s a given. you’re a burnt out gifted child and you were probably in top classes or top league for a sport between ages 8-14 before you started becoming more average. that’s fine too though, just remember you have talents that lie elsewhere you just have to find them.

IWAIZUMI HAJIME

-> daddy issues 0.2. you’re bossy and demanding but fair. you judge others accordingly and have a good sense of who’s a good person and who’s not. you need to be more open with people and let more people in though. you’re protective of yourself and don’t let your walls down so easily. soften them and let others in more.

MATSUKAWA ISSEI

-> you’re just here for a good time and a good railing that’s all i have to say.

HANAMAKKI TAKEHIRO

-> you’re the bitch that has to listen to the mattsun stans last hook up. you’re hot too, go have a good time.

KUROO TETSURŌ

-> you’re extremely hot and i would absolutely make out with you right here right now. no i’m kidding. i’m not but anyways, you have mommy issues and you need to get over it. you also need to stop being so analytical of people because some people don’t like being read and you step over peoples boundaries sometimes. control yourself you feral thing.

KOZUME KENMA

-> ah yes. everyone’s favourite ‘i have issues but i don’t want to deal with them, so i’ll be a whore online instead’. that’s a half joke but seriously, you’re doing fine bby you don’t even need to worry. nobodies judging you and even if they are they’re way uglier and dumber than you. even still you should be friendlier to those around you and let your guard down a little more.

YAKU MORISUKE

-> you’re like a little dog. yappy and lively. you’re also very trustworthy and i would tell you my deepest and darkest secrets and feel safe about it. you’re strong willed and put others in their place at ease. you do however, need to be a little more selfish and put yourself first at times. selflessness is great but it’s okay to put yourself first sometimes and you need to do that more often.

LEV HAIBA

-> you’re literally so hot and i’d be begging for your attention. you’re also slightly oblivious and have probably had several people crush on you at once but you’ve ignored them all unintentionally. you need to believe in yourself more and remind yourself that you’re that bitch. you’re capable of amazing things you just need to realise it yourself a little more

BOKUTO KOUTARŌ

-> okay mx mood swings you need to stop acting out over nothing. you’re gorgeous don’t get me wrong but dropping your slice of bread on the floor isn’t the end of the world. get over smaller things quicker and become more aware of your surroundings. you have a really good set of close friends and you’re friendly to everyone around you. you’re very very loved but you need to stop getting caught up over pointless things.

AKAASHI KEIJI

-> you’ve probably been called ‘boring’ before but that’s far from the truth. you make snide comments and you’re witty. you’re one of the most mentally stable people and you don’t get upset over petty argument or fights. you do howver nit pick at situations and get too critical. stop that because you only annoy yourself more and put yourself in a bad mood.

SHINSUKE KITA

-> you scare the shit out of me but in a good way. i’d be scared to talk to you because you’re so perfect? you do tend to come across as unapproachable though but that’s not your fault. smile a little more and don’t be afraid to laugh a little louder. your laugh is so pretty anyway so don’t be shy to let yourself loose a little more

ARAN OJIRO

-> you’re the type of person people think about for weeks after seeing you at the airport you’re that hot. you’re reliable and loved by many. you’ve got a good spirit and you’re mentally balanced. you need to stop overworking yourself though and stop getting too worried for other people in their place. you’ve already got enough on your plate so stop taking other peoples problems when you already have your own.

MIYA ATSUMU

-> you’re a bitch. no i have more to say. you’re misunderstood. you come across as a shitty person but that’s just because you’re passionate and hard at communicating in a way that’s not so blunt. you’re petty and dislikable at first but after a couple of conversations, people find out there’s so much more to you. you’re funny, hot and talented. just remember to work on holding back on the blunt statements a little more.

MIYA OSAMU

-> 2nd best kinda vibes. you ARE the pretty best friend but people always ignore that because you’re kinda overshadowed by others around you. you’re like a diamond in the rough and valuable to those lucky enough to find you and get to know you. don’t put yourself down so much and show others you can be independent and unique because that’s exactly what you are

SUNA RINTARŌ

-> you’re hot and that’s it. you’re probably the type of person to not show up to classes but still manage to pass every exam with ease. you’re almost too cool to approach and people probably think you’re bitching about them when they see you on your phone. what they don’t know is that you’re really looking at pictures of cows that have been washed and blowdried. you probably own a pink princess cowboy hat and your instagram is probably everyone’s pinterest board. just stop slacking off though because you can achieve so much more.

SAKUSA KIYOOMI

-> you’re powerful and elegant. you’re very level headed and go about problems the efficient way. you hate time wasters and don’t let people make you their bitch. you probably have a slight god complex but that’s okay because when you’re as hot as you are, it’s understandable. stop being so uptight and sensitive about things though. be kinder to your mind and let go of the things not worth holding a grudge against.

general taglist → @atsumuwoah @bloody-bella @bbymilkbread @miracleboy420 @doggonudez @tsumue @peteunderoos @tsukkisbean @saturnfarie @dear-kozume @zumisace @boosyboo9206 @totorosleaff @27kei @dai-tsukki-desu @angrylittleriri @dearestmegumi @kuxredere @warakou @iss6s @lovinnoya @sophiashortcake @wompwomphq @waitforitillwritemywayout @webworld @brokeasshoee @sunasbabie @rowley-with-ackerman @mjoork @trifliz @curiouslilbeast @ineedsomefoodpls @hp-hogwartsexpress

ALL CONTENT BELONGS TO @KUROOSKULT ON TUMBLR 2020 PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, CHANGE OR PLAGIARISE

[ugly-anastasia]

The Last 10 Years | Oneshot

Note: for the October Jekyll and Hyde task (write a one-shot featuring your character as first the protagonist and then the antagonist) I had an idea to try and tell Annie and Charlie’s story in the style of the musical The Last Five Years, since that is kind of the goal of that show’s storytelling style. Basically the premise is the same story told from two different perspectives, one in chronological order and the other in reverse-chronological order. Just wanted to clarify that in case the format is confusing. Enjoy!

Warnings for: alcohol, references to hazing, lots of messy/unhealthy relationship dynamics, misogyny, some nsfw topics

2021, Annie

The last time Anastasia Tremaine saw Charles King, he was shimmering. 

The morning light got in her eyes, Tennessee June out in all its glory as Annie loaded the last box into the Uber that would take her to the airport. Out of the corner of her eye, Annie could see Charlie bending down to give Harlynne and Jaxson each one last hug. The early summer sunshine seemed to sparkle on his Dri-Fit Vanderbilt Tennis shirt because of course it did. The world seemed to part for Charlie King and everything that made Annie squint and stumble and fall just painted him in brighter glory.

It was what she had always liked about him, wasn’t it? That she could look at him and see the sun? Annie’s life had always been defined by the people she surrounded herself with. Rodmilla Tremaine’s screechy daughter, Ella Ashbourne’s bitchy stepsister with the bad fake tan, and then Charlie King’s perky young wife. 

Maybe that was her mistake from the beginning. How was she going to define herself now?

2011, Charlie

The first time Charles King saw Anastasia Tremaine, she was shimmering. 

Literally. Covered in silver sparkles. The glitter bomb was a new ritual to welcome the Alpha Phi pledges, replacing the traditional surprise Jägerbomb after a lengthy hazing investigation that left the sisters scrambling to replace their traditions with those less explicitly related to alcohol. Of course, it was the first mixer of the year, so alcohol of all kinds was flowing through the Kappa Alpha house, just with enough plausible deniability to say that technically nobody underage was encouraged to drink. 

Luckily for the majority of the attendees at this mixer, they tended to have the kind of connections to get a good enough lawyer to get out of that stuff.

Charlie saw Annie sparkling as she stood on the coffee table and glitter rained down on her, shrieking in disgust (but maybe soaking up the attention just a little bit). And he knew that was his girl. She was attractive in a self-conscious kind of way, with her long legs and big nose, like maybe she was afraid she stuck out too much. It was easy to see through fake freshman confidence, and Charlie could already see her posh British accent impressing his parents. 

He hung back. He didn’t say anything yet. But Charlie had a feeling he would run into Annie Tremaine again.

2019, Annie

It was really quite plain and simple: Charlie was cheating.

Annie believed she was justified in going through his phone, because he was cheating. The signs were everywhere. He was always “going out to happy hour” after work even though he hadn’t been interested in “happy hour” since he’d started at the accounting firm six years ago. He seemed distracted lately. And his little icon always dropped off of the map on Find My Friends the same time every day. 

So when Charlie was in the shower, Annie reached across the bed and unlocked his phone. Unknown number.

Tonight again?

No, not tonight

When??? 😩😩😩 

Tomorrow?

Ur gonna make me wait until tomorrow

The anticipation will make it sweeter 😉

And there was her proof. “CHARLIE!” Annie roared, jumping out of bed and pounding on the shower door. She was justified. She had-- what was it they called it on those police procedurals? Probable cause? Annie had probable cause. Charlie came stumbling out of the shower, wrapping the towel around him and looking at her blearily. “Whaa-”

“Explain this!”

Charlie just stared at her. “Did you go through my phone?”

2013, Charlie

The plain and simple explanation was that Annie asked Charlie out. 

Two years after that first party where they locked eyes, after Annie had attracted a few whispers for stumbling through some on-off relationships with the more sensitive of the KA brothers, Annie went right up to Charlie at homecoming and asked him out. Charlie didn’t plan on getting tied down to a college girl right after he graduated. And no, he didn’t leverage any kind of power he might have had, because Annie had just applied for an internship at the accounting firm he and his father both worked at. That was her choice. Wasn’t that what feminism was all about or something?

Annie asked Charlie out with the brazen confidence of a brand new Co-Chair of Philanthropy, a confidence she would confess, taking a sip of her cosmo, actually came from Charlie’s encouragement. Last spring, right before graduation, Charlie had told Annie to go after her dreams, and Annie had decided that her dreams lied with Charlie King.

That was what Charlie had to explain to people when they raised eyebrows at his relationship with Annie. She had asked him out. It was even possible she was playing him to get her foot in the door at the firm. Right?

2015, Charlie and Annie

Charlie and Annie had a fight the night before their wedding. It started at the rehearsal dinner, when Charlie’s best man, a lanky KA brother named Ross, got into a tiff with Drizella over something political, and then Annie whispered to Charlie to shut him up, and Charlie didn’t, and now they were in their individual hotel rooms, shouting at each other on the phone.

“He’s my friend, Annie, I don’t control him!”

“I’m not asking you to control him, but you could have pulled him for a chat! Told him to tone it down!”

“Annie, why would that--”

“You have no problem doing that with me when I’m being a bitch! And I’ve done it with you when you’re being stupid! What’s the difference?”

“Annie, I--”

“I know why. It’s because you care more about fitting in with your stupid friends than you care about me! Grow up, Charlie, you’re getting bloody married!”

“Annie!” 

Silence.

“Look, Annie, I don’t know what you want me to say. I can’t travel back in time and do it different.”

“I want you to say you’re sorry!”

“Alright, Annie, I’m sorry.”

More silence. For a moment, Annie had a burning feeling that something might not be right. On the other side of the wall, Charlie had the same feeling.

They both wrote it off as cold feet. And the next day, they had a beautiful wedding, and it even made the society pages, and Annie had never gotten so many likes on Instagram. And Charlie’s mother was proud. And the fight was forgotten.

Until it wasn’t. 

2013, Annie 

Annie asked Charlie out because her mother said she should, and because her friends said that he was a sweet guy but he would never make the first move, and because a cute self-help book she had read said that if Annie didn’t take control of her destiny now, destiny would take control of her. Annie was a strong woman, and Charlie was cute and well-connected, and maybe he was a lot older, but that was the kind of man Annie wanted, anyway. Someone mature. Someone who wouldn’t walk out when things got hard. Charlie seemed steady.

And yes, maybe she told him that she had gotten her confidence from his little drunken pep talk that he gave her right before he graduated, even though that wasn’t really true. And maybe she faked it the first time they hooked up... and the second and third time, too. And maybe Annie swore she listened to all of his mixtapes, even when she found them quite boring. Men had fragile little egos, and Annie knew she could use that to her advantage. 

It didn’t matter, because at the end of things, Annie knew that she and Charlie would be perfect together. What was a little white lie here and there, a little corner cutting? It was destiny and she was just helping it along.

2019, Charlie

Cheating didn’t look good. It never did. Charlie had a kid, and another on the way, and a wife who was perfect on paper. Ross’s stare across the table at Buffalo Wild Wings (an old heartbreak haunt from the Vandy days) said all of that. But Charlie believed he deserved some sympathy. 

“She’s crazy, man!” Charlie argued.

“Charlie, you’re not supposed to call women crazy anymore. Erica--”

“I don’t care what bullshit Erica read on TheSkimm!”

“Charlie! That’s my wife you’re talking about!”

“Sorry,” Charlie grumbled, biting into his buffalo wing morosely. “But I think if she was paranoid enough that I was cheating on her that she had to go through my phone, then there’s a bigger problem. And, I’m just saying, she could’ve just asked me.”

“And you would have told her the truth?”

Charlie hmphed and threw the bone down on his plate, reaching for another wing. 

2011, Annie

The first time Annie saw Charlie, it was from behind.

But what a glorious back of his head it was! Thick chestnut-brown hair, gelled into a perfect side part but not too much that it couldn’t be tousled a little. A pink golf shirt-- there was nothing like a man who knew how to dress. And he was moving with purpose, with animation, like he knew he was the brightest star in the room and everyone around him was so lucky to bask in his light.

He was the shimmering outline of a boy you could fill in with all your hopes. And the other girls had told Annie to stay away from the older boys, that they would play with your heart and drop you by Christmas to ring-by-spring a girl more their speed. But Annie could see the pieces clicking into place. She had been raised to believe if you worked hard and wanted something badly enough and if you weren’t afraid to get your hands a little dirty, you could have whatever you wanted. And Annie wanted this. Badly.

Annie was tired of standing in the shadows. She wanted to attach herself to a boy who commanded the light, so she could shine, too. And she had finally found him.

2021, Charlie

The last time Charlie saw Annie, it was from behind, as she climbed into the car and didn’t bother to give him one last wave before speeding down the highway with the life he had spent the past ten years building.

Annie had gotten everything she wanted in the divorce. It was hard to sympathize with a cheater, especially one who already seemed to have a backup life ready to go as soon as his ex wife and kids were out of the way. Charlie didn’t really feel that way. He mostly resented Annie for blowing this up the way she had, turning one little affair into a marriage-shattering event, fleeing the country with both kids in tow. Charlie didn’t care what Ross said. She was crazy.

Mostly, Charlie mourned what could have been. He could have gone on having it all. He was doing a good job of balancing it. And he had been raised to believe that if he just managed everything tactfully enough, he could skate through life unencumbered, with nobody to say no to what he wanted. For the first time, he couldn’t. And it made Charlie livid.

But maybe it was time for a fresh start. He had Jenna, his beautiful girlfriend. He had his house, still. He had his Nashville friends, who had eventually come around to agree with Charlie that he was in the right (and Charlie believed that they liked Jenna better, anyway). 

The worst thing that Annie had done, Charlie decided, was think too highly of him. He wasn’t a man of principle or honor, he just projected that image in the settings where it was necessary. And she had been naive enough to believe in that. 

Charlie went back in the house and pulled up Jenna’s contact on his phone. From now on, he wasn’t going to lie about the kind of man he was. And hopefully, that would prevent him from repeating this whole mess over again.

[dukeofriven]

Good In The World

I meant what I said with that extended LOTR quote being what the Epilogues are about - about there being good in the world, and it being worth fighting for. Given that I’ve been up to my neck reading Hussie commentary lately I feel like I’ve gotten a pretty strong grasp on what makes him tick - and who boy does this guy love stories about friendship, teamwork, and love, loves them so much he sometimes sounds like Téa Gardner about to lay down a friendship speech on Yu-Gi-Oh. So - while noting that the extent to which the epilogues are and are not Hussie’s work are even more muddled that usual in regards Homestuck - the take-away is this: everything went wrong, in both Meat and Candy, because everyone forgot that - that friendship, teamwork, and love is the only reason any of them survived. The Sburb survivors came to Earth-C as literal gods, beings of inordinate celebrity and power, and then didn’t work as hard as they should have to still be friends and family. We point to John as some kind of recluse but it quickly becomes clear that everyone stopped working at staying together. Karkat and Dave are as much shut-ins as John, stewing together in their own incapacity. Katkat’s self-loathing, so often a hilarious joke in Homestuck is - free of the immediate pressures of Sburb - shown to be intensely debilitating. It undermines him repeatedly in Meat, and requires incipit genocide in Candy to be set aside, costing him everything that mattered on a personal level. Dave made the mistake of many in his position before him, leaning too much on the first epiphany about trauma and not taking the care to continue down the path to further healing and reconciliation with the past. It leaves him desperately reaching for intimacies he too scared of to actually experience. Coupled with an abused kid’s terror of perpetuating harm he lies to Karkat and Jade both time and time again to try and save their feelings. Jade, so utterly fucked up by years of isolation and loneliness, and so endearingly, crushingly full of love makes all the wrong decisions in trying to build a triad (that is - the triad could have worked, but she went about it all wrong) and makes two separate instantiations of Dave and Karkat miserable. Rose and Kanaya have no malice in their actions, but they do what married people always do: pull away from everyone else, and focus on themselves and their new lives. Harmless, normally - or, at least, not seriously harmful - but those lives took them underground and away from everyone else, The two most insightful and level-headed members of the party simply weren’t around when everyone needed them most. Unaware how bad things were getting they missed so many of the warning sides that would have clued them in earlier that everyone was going off the rails - and being as isolated as she was in Meat this left Rose vulnerable to the manipulation most likely to succeed: just like with Doc Scratch she was preyed upon by someone who could flatter her sense of grievance, knowledge, and uniqueness. Terezi wouldn’t have stood by and let things go to shit - but she was doomed the moment she tied her heart to ego personified, and so was absent too.  As for the Alphas, well - their problems were never resolved in the first place, their 'conflict arcs’ interrupted by the arrival of the betas. Only Roxy, element of void, utterly self-contained, a refugee from a dead reality, walked onto Earth-C able to withstand the horror that awaited them: celebrity. Skaia is benevolent, but it is not wise: Sburb seems to have a cherub’s worldview, full of bright colours and heightened stories, but not much maturity. When the victors of Sburb escaped to Earth-C the last thing they needed was celebrity, praise, and positions of note. The issues are all laid out in the prologue: John retired before he ever started working, every one of them richer than any mortal could conceive of. These kids didn’t need parades, they needed to go school. Jane didn’t need honorary degrees from every business school on the planet, Jake didn’t need a TV show centred entirely around his ass: what everyone needed was to be aggressively ordinary. Mundane and unregarded. They needed to put everyone in a group home with four on-staff counselors and take a chunk of years doing nothing but heal. Because everyone was damaged. Other than Calliope - a special case - everybody walked out of Sburb having witnessed at least one apocalypse. Put aside any of the individual traumas and deaths and abuses and sins and just focus on that alone: the death of entire worlds and the burden of saving seven sentient species. Rather than the ultimate Reward being a sit-down with kindly professionals who could help a bunch of kids cope with that, these literal children entered a new world and built new lives on a foundation of dust. The beta kids never finished seventh grade. Jane Crocker never finished high school. Jade Harley, Jake English, Roxy Lalonde, and Dirk Strider never went to school at all. Not one of those four had ever been around more than four humans in their lives until the day they won the game. They couldn’t have. Jade and Jake grew up alone on islands. Roxy and Dirk grew up in the apocalypse. Dirk grew up in a literal box. As Cascade hit Dave and John were the only living humans Jade had ever met who wasn’t her grandpa: and she spent three years alone on a ship with only the Nannasprites and consorts for company. (And Jaspers to chase.) For those four especially, think about they went through within 24-hours: BAM here’s a group of people including your alt-relatives and literal aliens BAM here’s a crazy fucking battle against technicolour chess people, killer dogs, and fish queens BAM here’s a pristine new-ish world better BAM produce thousands of species to populate a new world /TABLE SCRATCH/ Welcome to Earth-C in the year 5000 Celebrity Gods. Here’s your debit cards full of riches. Seriously - this all happens in about a day. And yet people are shocked that things didn’t work out? They were sixteen years old. Four of them had no formal education of any kind, nor had ever been around enough to people to form a softball team. And that’s not even starting on the trolls, who had multiple culture-shocks and traumas of their own the sort through. And yet people are shocked that things didn’t work out? There is, absolutely, a way all of this could have been addressed and become a happy ending. If you don’t like the Epilogues because you’re just sick and fucking tired of tragedy stories - boy do I feel you. Man, don’t get me started on shit like Westword we will be here all week. If you just wanted there to be a fucking happy ending because god-damnit people deserve to be happy - I feel that too. Had that been what we got I can’t say that I’d have been displeased. But if you’re angry because what happened in the Epilogues seems “unreasonable”  all I can do is wave my arms at all the shit everybody went through and ask you why going from that to retired celebrity godhood was good for anyone. What happened on Earth-C was nobody’s fault - not even Dirk’s. Of course he lost it. Of course he took his godhood to its logical conclusions - what possible grounding in real human beings had he ever seriously had, and what in his life was there to make him see people as people? Dude grew up alone in a box with SBAHJ and rapping robots for company - the only voice in his head his own, magnified in the echo chamber of ego and his own blindness to his inadequacies.  Why wouldn’t Jane cling to status quo of her dead world? Really, what did Sburb ever bring her but heartbreak, an excessively baroque Bad Relationship Simulator that took away her home and her position as a corporate heiress for a six month romp through a bunch of dead planets and inter-friend squabbling (We don’t talk about how fucking boring the alpha session was: nothing but undead and emptiness.) She reaches a new world, gets told how smart she is, gets a bunch of degrees - but as Dave himself notes, when you’re rich as can be and have everyone on the planet lining up to do business with you, it’s pretty easy to think you’re actually skilled at running things, especially if YOU STOPPED YOUR EDUCATION AT SIXTEEN AND GOT TOLD THAT YOUR SIXTEEN YEAR OLD SELF WAS THE APEX OF YOUR BEING. Take a moment to remember yourself at sixteen. Try to put sixteen year old you in charge of something meaningfully important - like, mmh, let’s say a regional bank. Uh - oh. Oh dear. Oh it’s on fire, is it? And the fire is spreading? Yeah, that’ll happen. [One glaring issue I’ll note in these epilogues is that nobody knows what the fuck to do about Dad Crocker, so they do... nothing, until Candy reminds you he exists in order to kill him to motivate Jane to do something she probably could have been easily prompted to do anyways by another means. I guess Dad Crocker just... happily let Jane not finish school or exert any kind of parental control at all after that point? On her or anybody else? You want to talk about OOC: what the fuck happened with Dad Crocker, of whom I expected better? And where did Tavrosprite and the Nannasprites go?] My point in all this is that Homestuck is a story about how important love, teamwork, and friendship is, and after the Earth-C victory everybody got lost. Everybody reacted to being Celebrity Gods in their own way, and it created little cracks that widened over time, and when everyone should have been coming closer together - group therapy sessions, even - they got further and farther apart. These emotionally-stunted mentally-teenaged kids with buckets of trauma, the power of gods, and the celebrity to match broke. One by one. All in their own unique ways. The Epilogues are in some sense a musing on the absurdity of adulthood - how its mantel is placed upon you regardless of whether you are ready or not, for reasons as arbitrary as ‘turning a certain age’ or ‘winning a video game.’ In some cases it takes our heroes DECADES of life before adulthood - before real maturity - begins to make something of an appearance, and even then it’s a crapshoot. Love, friendship, and teamwork are what matter in Homestuck: in the epilogues it takes years of monumentally boneheaded decisions for our heroes to remember this, and some of them never do.

Is there still a happy ending at the end of Homestuck? One that lies ahead? I think so. Hussies loves his characters dearly - and yes, he does. Of course he does. He didn’t spend ten years of his life telling the story of one dimensional Brechtian Archetypes to make some otiose point about the nature of narrative: if he had none of you would be feeling as you are now.  The difference between you and Andrew Hussie is that you see his characters like family: you leap to their defence whenever they are hurt, and when they are cut you bleed: “How?” you ask, “Could anyone be so cruel to do this thing?” But Hussie sees his characters as characters, in a story of which he is author, and in which pain and hurt and tragedy can be the vehicles through which good stories can be told: that the light is made all the brighter because of the quantity and quality of darkness that was banished. Candy and Meat are the story of a boy who can only destroy love because he thinks he understands it, and lashes-out when things don’t go as planned. Dirk is just as much the villain in Candy as in Meat, as Calliope makes very clear: the Candyverse is in some sense defined, or at least made more distinct, by his absence. He is a tragic figure on the macro scale - if only he and all the walking wounded of Sburb had been given help when they needed it - but his death in Candy is not a tragedy of ‘what ifs,’ it’s an act of petulance and cruelty by a kid who’ll take his ball and go home if he’s not allowed to play the winning game. His death destabilizes the Candyverse far more than John’s choice to stay, its just that its corrosive effects take longer to be obvious - and the gears he’d already set in motion didn’t cease to turn, though they may have slowed. Dirk destroys love, his effect on both timelines is to push people apart because division suits him, and to push his own view of what ‘love’ is on people who experience it far more expansively than he could ever imagine. He’s a sad little boy who grew up in alone in a box and entered a world that told him he was a literal god with the powers to match - by the end of Meat it’s clear that love, friendship, and teamwork mean nothing to him, only the perfect order of his own fevered imagination. What will bring him down in the end is the reclamation of that feeling at the end of Act 7 - the joy of victory, of having worked together, of the love of family both found and familial, and of the realization that they were none of them better apart. And then some therapists. Some actual therapists. For a good long time. (Also I hope that they find Doc Scratch and beat his sorry ass from here to eternity because that smug fuck has his puppety fingertips all over this thing, and if Dirk really is merging with his ultimate self that includes (as @geekycalligrapher noted) aspects that wound up in Lord English, including a not insignificant portion of one Doctor Vanilla Milkshake, Esq.) (Edit: I did, in fact, do a few edits when I noticed the opening sentences were missing things like ‘the subject.’)

[keqingcatears]

Wolf Moon (Part 1)

Summary: Beacon Hills looked like a normal town on textbook, but creatures from fairy tales lurk in the dark unbeknownst to everyone. Serena Masters is one of these people. Former best friends to Scott and Stiles, Serena reunites with them after a frightful event that’s going to change the town forever and secrets will begin to unfold. This story will follow the plot line of TW with occasional changes to accommodate Serena’s backstory.

Characters/Pairings: Serena/OC, Scott McCall, Stiles Stilinski, Derek Hale, Lydia Martin, Allison Argent, Jackson Whittemore, Serena x Stiles!platonic 

Word Count: 1486 

A/N: no one asked for this but I’m so bored in quarantine rn and I’m rewatching TW and I was in a big writing mood. this is a project that was just for me to read and write but I decided to try and share my work for once so I don’t feel as lonely as I do writing. if anyone reads this and wants more i’ll be surprised ngl, but i hope you enjoy it!

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Serena walked quietly through the woods carefully so as to not disturb the tranquil night before the first day of second semester. She was supposed to be inside of her house sleeping but a friend had called her saying he was having some troubles. He didn’t say much but only that he was having family issues.  

She stopped walking and looked around. It was so dark she could barely see the branches except only when they appeared in front of the moon that lit them up. She was sure he was supposed to meet here but as far as she knew there was nothing. 

She took out her phone and typed a quick message to him. The sound of soft rustling caught her ears. Suddenly, a dark figure jumped out, his hands outstretched to catch her off guard. She predicted his movements just in time and grappled his arm to throw him to the ground. 

“You should be less noisy next time.” Serena dusted off her hands on her jeans. Little dark strands of her hair were tickling her face. She brushed them away to stop them from sticking to her. 

Her friend let out a grunt and pushed himself up. “And you haven’t changed much. Except for the fact that you grew and got stronger it seems.” He popped out his muscles to release the pain and tension. 

A soft smile appeared on her lips. “Well, Derek, I am maturing. It’s only natural I get stronger.” She noticed his dark eyebrows were furrowing over and over. “Is everything okay though? You called at an alarming time.”

Derek let out a deep sigh almost like he was gasping for his last breath. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket. Serena patiently waited for him to speak up knowing it was best that she shouldn’t push him to talk. 

“It’s Laura. She’s dead.”

Serena’s heart rate picked up but she willed herself to calm down. “Like natural causes?” She knew that was a stupid question but she didn’t want to believe that an Alpha could die so easily. A small part of her somehow knew it was anything but sickness. 

“Murder. Another werewolf.” Derek’s jaws tensed up. She could tell this was already hitting him like a truck. He lost another family member, his sister at that. Excluding Derek and his uncle, she wondered if there were even more of his family alive. At this point, it seems like his lineage might come to an end. 

Then it struck her. His last comment. “Another werewolf? But who would be targeting Laura?”

“I don’t know,” Derek said. His eyes were cast down onto the ground. “I just need you to be careful and keep an eye out. You’re the only one I can trust right now.”

“Of course. And you as well.”

“I think I’ll be fine.” 

“You almost got beaten by a fifteen year old girl.”

He rolled his eyes. “That was just luck.”

“And you’re just not admitting defeat.” Serena walked to his side and patted his chest. “Be safe and have a good night!” With that, she strolled back towards the entrance of Beacon Hills Reserves. 

#

“Thanks for the ride, Lydia,” Serena said slinging her backpack over her shoulders. 

Lydia checked herself out in her side mirrors before flipping a strand of her strawberry-blonde curls behind her. “No problem. We didn’t want you coming in one of those dingy school buses on the first day back.”

“But I don’t ride the bus?”

“Oh still, we don’t want to ruin our image.”

“You mean your image.” 

“Exactly. Now, come on.” Lydia stuck out her arm for Serena to loop her own arm through and the two of them walked to the front of the school.

While passing by Serena noticed two old faces standing by and talking. One with a buzz cut and the other with shaggy hair. Scott and Stiles. She would already hear Stiles’ voice excitedly go off about something while Scott stood with the same lop-sided smile on his face. As they were passing by, she barely heard Stiles make a comment about Lydia not even paying much attention to her. If only she could punched that stupid smile off of his face. 

Serena loves Lydia like her own sister but my god she despises Stiles for being head over heels for her. She never forgave him for what he did to her. 

First period was English, and of course she had to have the same class with them. She sat right of Scott while Stiles sat behind and diagonally from his own best friend. Before class started, Scott had shot her a smile earning him one back. 

“As you all know, there indeed was a body found in the woods last night,” the teacher began. 

Serena's eyes shot wide open. A body? Laura’s body? 

“And I am sure your eager little minds are coming up with various macabre scenarios as to what happened. But I am here to tell you that the police have a suspect in custody, which means you can give your undivided attention to the syllabus which is on your desk outlining this semester.”

The groan of students was evident that nobody wanted to read the syllabus but the teacher chose to ignore it anyways. Before class could continue, the door opened and the vice principal walked in with a pretty young girl in tow. She shyly looked around.

“Class, this is our new student, Allison Argent. Please do your best to make her feel welcome.”

A crease appeared between Serena’s brow. She wasn’t sure what caused the confused reaction but she was sure she heard the name before, but where? The vice principal left the room as Allison made her way to the empty seat behind Scott. 

“We’ll begin with Kafka’s Metamorphosis, on page one thirty-three,” the teacher said. Serena did what was told and began to zone out. 

#

“There’s a new girl in school. Her name is Allison Argent, quite pretty too.” Serena met up with Lydia by her locker after the day ended. 

“And you’re telling me because?”

Serena playfully rolled her eyes. “Because I think she’s nice and she could use a few friends. You’re the most popular girl in the school, why not say hi?” Just then, dark curly locks caught her eye at the end of the hallway. She nudged her friend. “Her. That’s Allison.” Lydia took a few seconds inspecting the girl like some juicy prey out in the wild. She could hear a slight hum coming out of her. 

“Let’s go,” Lydia announced, shutting her locker and clicking her boots away to the shy new girl. 

Serena followed suit behind the determined girl but halted when she noticed Scott and Stiles opposite of Allison’s locker. Usually, their presence didn’t faze her but the way Scott froze in place made her question what he was doing. He was already odd to begin with but not that odd to stare from afar. She told herself not to listen to their own conversation and turned back to Lydia and Allison.

“You know Serena, right?” Lydia nudged her forward. 

“Oh yeah, we have English together,” Allison said.

“Lucky you. You have one of the smartest kids in your classes.”

Serena scoffed. “I’m not that smart.”

“Says the one who’s dad is literally an English professor at UCLA.”

A small burst of air whizzed past and someone wrapped their arms around Lydia’s small waist. “Hey Jackson.” She turned around and gave the handsome lacrosse player a kiss. “So, this weekend, there’s a party.”

“A party?” Allison asked. 

“Yeah, Friday night,” Jackson confirmed.

“You should come! It’ll be fun,” Serena added. 

Allison shrugged. “Uh, I can’t. It’s family night this Friday. Thanks for asking.” 

Jackson furrowed his brows. “You sure? Everyone’s going after the scrimmage.”

“You mean like football?” 

Everyone chuckled except for Allison.

“Football’s a joke in Beacon. The sport here is lacrosse. We’ve won the state championship for the past three years.”

Lydia brushed at his gelled hair. “Because of a certain team captain.”

Serena didn’t want to be one to correct her saying Jackson was only a sophomore making it possible that he only had one state championship under his belt. Then again, she knew Lydia was smart enough to know and this whole thing was an act. 

“Well, we have practice in a few minutes. That is, if you don’t have anywhere else--”

“Well, I was going to--”

Lydia gripped a cuff of Allison’s jacket. “Perfect, you’re coming!” Lydia gestured for Serena to follow behind and she was going to until she noticed Scott’s vacant stare in their direction. She politely waved but when Stiles made eye contact with her she immediately dropped her hand and glared right back. 

She turned her heel and marched with the group. The last thing she heard was Stiles’ saying “She’s still mad?”