#anyway like. this isn't me thinking i'm some perfect caregiver or anything

[yardsards]

this next part is just me bitching but. the main interaction that lead to me making this post (combined with just. all of the incidents of me saying my current job and whoever i'm talking to goving me wayyy too much kudos for just Doing This Job and me feeling sooo weirded out bc like bruh it's not community service it is a Job that i am getting paid for. and this job is easier and pays better than my past job as a cashier but no one gave me kudos for being a cashier.):

during a work holiday party me and a couple coworkers were talking about this pair of clients we shared

and someone brought up how the husband was nice but the wife was a grouch (in my case, she was a little sour to me at first but actually became quite sweet once she got to know me. apparently she had not similarly warmed up to any of my coworkers. which, by the end of this conversation, i realized Exactly Why). no screaming or hitting or any other kind of abuse, not even direct insults, just generally being a bit impatient and condescending and grumpy.

and then my (already least favourite, lol) coworker was like "i straightup told her she couldn't be talking to me like that. that i was there to provide help and if she was gonna treat me like that then i wasn't gonna help her anymore."

and all of our coworkers there, INCLUDING OUR SUPERVISOR, were congratulating her for "standing up for herself" or whatever???

and like see if she was a cashier or housekeeper or whatever i would've been like "hell yeah, get their ass, demand respect on the job" but in the context of this job it really just rubbed me the wrong way because like.

1: we have a significant power over our patients that most other professions don't have over their customers

2: i question if she would have said that to a customer if she was a cashier or housekeeper, or if she only felt emboldened to do this/deserving of a certain degree of respect BECAUSE of the power we have over our patients

3: while we absolutely shouldn't tolerate outright *mistreatment* on the job (as i said above, we're employees, not fucking martyrs), i think we need to be a little more discerning over what constitutes mistreatment than many other professions do. like we gotta be able to think "yeah this woman is in constant physical pain, knows death isn't far away, and now has to pay money to have total fucking strangers coming into her house to do tasks for her that she used to be able to do by herself. it's actually pretty understandable for her to be huffing and eyerolling here and it's not a personal attack on my ego"

4: the way my coworker talked about being there to help like she was providing a FAVOUR rather than just... doing the job that she is getting PAID to

AND THEN this mf had the gall to be like "it's funny that she's planning on checking herself into a home in the next few months. they aren't gonna tolerate being talked to like that there and she's not gonna be in charge there like she is at her house." and like??? idk man i just don't think we should be treating losing power via institutionalization as a justified punishment

i wish i could say that i had some eloquent retort about disability rights and whatnot to stand up for that lady but i was just too fuckin dumbfounded to say anything

i think i've said it before but. as a professional caregiver it rubs me the wrong way how our field (and pretty much any field that involves caring for vulnerable people) is venerated

like don't get me wrong i am all for appreciating blue collar type professions, employees that are underpaid and overworked and vital for how our society functions

but it's a specific flavour of treating us like martyrs that doesn't show up when people appreciate construction workers or garbage truck drivers or janitors or fry cooks or whatnot.

it's a specific flavour of acting like we're doing a huge selfless favour for our clients that doesn't show up when people appreciate customer service workers or housekeepers or whatnot.

what's really ironic there is caregivers have far more power over their clients than customer service workers or housekeepers have over their clients.

and it just leads to so much shittiness in the industry. it's bad for patients cuz they don't feel like they can speak out when a caretaker is mistreating them (or even just doing something they don't like, even on accident), cuz they're expected to feel grateful for what the caregiver is doing for them. and it enables some shitty caregivers to get a complex about how their patients owe them gratitude for doing their jobs. isn't good for non-shitty caregivers too cuz sometimes the good ones then feel obligated to overextend and sacrifice themselves to be worthy of that gratitude.

just like yeah idk appreciate us but don't appreciate us any differently than you should appreciate any other worker i guess idk

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Hi! Apologies if your inbox is a weird place to drop this, but. I have had an animorphs thought haunting me and just absolutely not enough spoons to do anything with it myself, and you're the only animorphs blog I really know...so I guess I thought I'd maybe offer it up here and hopefully it'll resonate with someone? Anyway, the thought. 47 is a WEIRD book...what could a rewrite of it look like? And from there, I've become obsessed with the idea of yeerks find the hork bajir valley, but instead of what happens canonically, the animorphs & Toby arrive at a horrible possible solution: the yeerks will be there too soon for them to just run & nobody wants to give up their home -> if they leave some behind to fight and stall they'll get infested and the yeerks will know to keep looking -> ...but what if the force they leave behind genuinely doesn't know they're being sacrificed? They fight and die or are infested genuinely believing the rest of the valley is right behind them as reinforcements, while in actuality that group is being evacuated (maybe to return to their ellemist-protected home after the yeerks leave, convinced they've put down the free hork bajir, ymmv on that). The dam & the subsequent breaking of it is a cover to create chaos and really distract anyone from wondering about the numbers too much. I just think it could be a perfect opportunity to explore infestation, choices made to prevent it, etc...plus give a lens for talking about betrayal & lies for the "greater good" and via that, actually address the falling out between Jake and Ax from 46...plus maybe foreshadow that Jake is ultimately going to pull something disturbingly similar with the Auximorphs! like I said, I don't have the spoons to do anything substantial with this concept, but yeah, I wanted to set it loose. I absolutely won't be offended if you decide your blog isn't the venue for this, and regardless, love your writing and I hope you're doing well.

I like this idea, because yeeeaaaah, #47 is a hot mess. And a classic case of "you tried to do antiracism but fumbled it so bad you kind of just circled back around to being condescending about race."

But also, I love how this would actually interrogate the idea of "you're better off dead than a controller." Because the series presents that idea as true, basically without question, and basically without proof. The only time I think Animorphs comes close to questioning it is the end of #28, and even then it's in the midst of Cassie and Ax debating a different point.

Because I'm sure being a controller is awful. And I'm sure there are indeed fates worse than death. But just assuming from the outside that someone is better off dead is a slippery fucking slope. One that causes 100s of disabled people every year to get murdered by their caregivers. You don't get to assume from the outside that someone forfeits their right to life just because you think they'd be "better off dead" than poor or disabled or communist or enslaved.

So I'd love to see an Animorphs plotline where several hork-bajir choose to let themselves be captured and infested, knowing that doing so is necessary for the war effort and that the alternative is dying. (IMHO Toby would never do this without the sacrifices' permission — she isn't Jake.) These would be hork-bajir who have been controllers before, hork-bajir who understand better than Jake ever will how precarious their entire species is. If they say "I will let myself be captured in the hope of rescue once we win the war, rather than dying" then I think there's tremendous courage in that. And I'd love to see it explored.

[anemicjellyfish]

Get Well Soon

A short, fluff-filled Stolitz fanfic.

Summary: Blitzø is sick & Stolas is a sweet caregiver.

Content warnings: illness, mentions of eating food and drinking water, medicine use (for illness), some sexual language.

Inspired by my current Covid situation. (I work in healthcare; it's inevitable for me. Please remember to wear a mask and be safe, everyone! 💖)

Blitzø shuffles himself onto his side, careful not to fall off his couch. Before he opens his eyes, the coughing resumes.

He didn't know where he'd picked up this bug, but like with most illnesses, he would bounce back in a few days. A few miserable days, full of coughing, fever, aching joints and muscles, and endless sneezing.

Blitzø reaches to move his blanket, only now noticing that it isn't his blanket. He's not on his couch, or even in his own apartment.

Groaning, Blitzø puts his head in his hands, remembering last night: he'd snuck through Stolas' window, as usual... and nearly collapsed from the effort. Despite Blitzø's insistence that he could live up to his part of the full moon arrangement they'd made, Stolas wouldn't allow him. And Blitzø ended up being placed in bed and falling asleep before he could protest further.

Blitzø glances at the bedside table. A beautiful crystal glass of water with two small tablets rests next to a piece of paper. In Stolas' too-perfect handwriting, it reads, "For Blitzy".

His throat too dry, Blitzø drinks most of the water before picking up the tablets. He considers sniffing them but knows he's unable to smell anything until the illness passes. Blitzø takes them with the rest of the water, shaking the glass a little to get every drop. Just as he sets it down, the door to the bedroom opens.

"Blitzy?" Stolas whispers, peeking in. "Oh, I hope I didn't wake you?"

"No, Stolas, I-" Blitzø's voice cracks a little, "I just woke up," he finished.

Stolas enters the bedroom, carrying a serving tray with fresh fruit, some type of bread, and a full pitcher of water. Blitzø's eyes widen, and he grabs the pitcher before Stolas can set the tray down. He doesn't care that Stolas should see him like this; his throat and body are screaming for water.

A look of concern on Stolas' face changes to amusement. "I'll call for more water," he says, sitting close to Blitzø on the side of the bed. "Are you feeling better?"

Blitzø pants and brushes away the water that had dripped down his chin. "I'm fine, Stols," he replied. "Or I will be in a few days, once this fuckin' bullshit is outta me. Don't you worry, when I'm better, I'll keep up my end of the deal. I'll show your feathered ass a real good time -"

"Easy, Blitzy," Stolas reached out, carefully removing the water pitcher with one hand and placing his other on Blitzø's cheek. "Not too much excitement, now. Why don't you rest here for a few days? Recover. Via and Stella will be gone for a while, visiting Stella's family. They never bother to invite me, anyway. Rest here."

Blitzø tries to protest, but when Stolas' hand slid down his back and settled between his spines - just where he liked it - his attempt turns into a weak cough.

"Fine," he finally says. Blitzø lets his eyes shut as he rests against Stolas' chest, letting the soft down feathers cover his face.

A small figure appears in the doorway, and Stolas uses his magic to bring over the new pitcher of water. The Goetia staff may talk amongst themselves about his affair, but Stolas can't bring himself to care now. The door shuts.

Letting Blitzø drink his fill of the water, Stolas set the pitcher aside and convinces him to eat. With the fever and cough now slightly better from the medicine, Stolas moves into the bed, pulling Blitzø onto his lap.

Without thinking too much about it, Blitzø wraps his tail around Stolas' leg and settles in once again. Stolas places his hand on Blitzø's back, letting his fingers slide in-between the spines.

"When I get better," Blitzø mumbles, almost asleep, "I swear I'm giving you the fucking of your life, Stols."

He feels Stolas laugh under him.

"I look forward to it, my darling Blitzy."

End.

[sunny6677]

HERES OPPOSITE TOM!

( OPPOSITE AU IS CREATED BY @jacenotjason )

Tom, in this AU, has very little energy and usually has no time for fooling around. She lacks motivation, and is usually bored half the time. However, she tends to daydream a lot and often daydreams of becoming a female knight for some reason because she has the unhealthy mindset of 'I don't need anyone because I'm strong and if I need anyone to help me or protect me at all then I'm weak', and liked to imagine herself as a knight because that's what she thinks she should be like. Her dynamic with Kevin is kind of reversed here too lol. He thinks they're friends at first, while Tom is just someone who always comes in to finish her work in his store since it's usually quiet enough to do that—she isn't a full on asshole to him but does find him annoying, and just calls him 'Fish Man' for a while instead of his actual name. Her job here is also something to do with art, though she's very vague about it and usually avoids mentioning her job around people. She is I incredibly poor, her favorite food is garlic bread, and she likes to solve puzzles rather than making them. She's also very intelligent in this AU, kind of witty, and is also a bit sassy. But despite acting like she takes no nonsense, she is a real softie deep down. And she's also still a babysitter here, but is usually very fed up with the more energetic kids and struggles to keep up with them. She hides most genuine things about herself as well because she finds it embarrassing or feels like no one would care anyway.

Buque (her caregiver) wasn't neglectful of her and didn't verbally mistreat her, and did mean well—but would sometimes do things she shouldn't have or snap at Tom just because she couldn't control her stress. And no matter how much Buque tries to act like this was just a mistake, this is still effecting Tom and it always will. And also the reason why Tom is so intent on being strong is because Opposite Jeremy was the very same way, so she subconsciously thinks she must be that way in order to be worth something.

Her flaws with Kevin and hers relationship here is that she usually is very intent on not depending on anyone for anything, so she pretty much avoids help from him at all costs and pretty much anyone—she always tries to help him out even if whatever happened probably isn't her responsibility to fix. Tom also doesn't repress her emotions here and IS honest about how she feels, but she feels very embarrassed anytime someone dares ask about it or tries to comfort her. She also tends to avoid Kevin in general at first just because she finds him slightly annoying, but also doesn't wanna be a bother or come off as clingy due to a certain incident in the past making her afraid to actually be clingy with other people.

I'm unsure of what Kevin's flaws would be since I didn't create this version of him (his canon versions flaws or at least his flaws toward Tom in her actual canon au are being a bit of a jerk to her at first because of his stress, kinds dismissing her emotions at first due to being too wrapped up in his own problems to notice her own and also just being so used to her being dramatic that he usually thinks her being upset is just her being a drama queen again, etc etc). But I'm sure he'd have his own too since no relationship is perfect. /lh

Will defintely make sketches of her and Opposite Kevin at some point—just not tonight cuz I'm tired lol./lh

(Also rather than being possesed, she just owns a Haunted object—aka, the rather ancient/suspicious looking journal she got from a garage sale one time)

[kiki-wiccan]

Elidi is indebted to Tamryn's embrace, her touch grounding the witch the moment her arms are around Elidi. She turns her head to rest her cheek against the Alpha's chest, focusing solely on the sound of Tamryn's heart beating. Part of her apologetic for her chaotic nature, though the moment her lover approached her the static energy in the air around Elidi dispersed, that much she could control. "I just didn't want to shock you, Red. Only reason I told you to stay, well that and possible danger..." Elidi muttered, digits tracing idly along the Alpha's spine, "I knew I was going to get angry.." However, with Tamryn's statement on her anger, Elidi's brows furrowed together leaning to press a playful nip to her neck. "I am calming down at least.." She retorted as she turned to press her cheek back to Tamryn's skin, hues lifting as the front door opens. Briefly, her brows rose in surprise upon seeing Kiki, though her temper is quick to make its return as she rises suddenly from the stool, the wood clattering to the floor loudly. "What happened? I told you to water plants and feed Binx, not create a mess!" Vexation smolders in her throat, eyes shutting tightly as she grabs hold of her emotions once more. Blue hues open to peer at the Wiccan, observant of her current state, the puffiness to her eyes, red and irritated to the tangled mess of her dark locks. "I don't care about the mess! That isn't why I'm angry." Elidi exhaled through her nose, reminding herself to focus. "Kiki, what's going on? This isn't like you to do something like this." There was no way Kiki had done this for no reason, despite what Tamryn said, Kiki wasn't a virulent human, Elidi had known plenty of those in her days. Her hand sought Tamryns, her grip tighter than usual while her hues refused to leave the wiccan, and having Tamryn by her side helped soothe the storm.

Staying silent in the moment she focused more so on being calm and exerting a passive energy that Elidi would hopefully feel and let calm her. As her love rested her head against her chest she moved one hand up to caress her lover’s jawline fondly, attempting every calming touch she could to soothe the static energy she felt surfacing in her partner. Hearing her suddenly defend her reasoning behind telling her of all people to stay the proud she wolf huffed and shook her head softly,

 “Mon amour I am not worried about that, I know you meant to be protective I love that about you, however I will never let you walk into danger by yourself. I will always be right there, protecting you as you protect me. As for hurting me, darling I may have soft and pretty features but I am far more resilient than I look. Never feel like you have to hide parts of who you are from me, I love you, and that means even the parts of you that you do not love within yourself. Your anger does not scare me, nor does the chance you could lose control of your power and hurt me. It takes a lot more than some sparks to hurt me. Plus, every time we touch I already feel the sparks between us so, I am sure I can handle a little more of it.”

She smarted with an arch to her elegant brow as she leaned down and kissed the top of her love’s head reassuringly. Feeling the nip against her neck her eyes shifted yellow almost against her will as she growled softly down at her lover with a wicked smile upon her red lips. Leaning into her love almost temptingly she eyed her lips for a moment before tilting her head,

 “That’s good to hear, though if you nip at my neck one more time I don’t think I will be able to stay calm.”

Letting her love seek comfort in her arms once more the Alpha stood close to the witch and let her take as long as she needed to gather herself before figuring out what to do next. The moment Kiki entered the home Tamryn went defensive. Her body tensed as she let out a threatening growl. She didn’t react fully until Kiki stepped into the main room and spoke her lover’s name. Tamryn turned within seconds and was defensively in front of Elidi. She looked like an attack dog being held back by the simple fact Elidi didn’t tell her to attack. Her golden hues bore into the wiccan girl with intentions to inflict harm, and correct the disrespectful girl’s mentality the way she would a unruly wolf within her community.

The red head had her fangs bared and her claws ready though she was not down in an attack stance, she stood taller and almost unnatural still despite the rolling snarl coming from within her chest. She was furious and held back simply by the fact she respected Elidi enough to not break their promise, even though she felt it would have been justified. Rather than letting her Alpha nature take charge, she let Elidi speak and lead the situation by her own terms. Tamryn was merely there to prevent Kiki from coming any closer, and to literally toss the wiccan out if Elidi so much as gave her the look to do so.

Returning the grip with her own to reassure her love that she was there the Alpha focused on the wiccan once more. Her eyes still glowing yellow with the savage need to defend the woman she loved from the one who was in Tamryn’s eyes simply taking advantage of her. Another rolling snarl kept up from her throat as she thought of the ways she would enforce the reasons Kiki should learn to either respect or fear them both.

She could feel the alphas eyes on her and knew the wolf was infuriated with her. However she didn’t pay mind to it as she was solely focused on Elidi. It hurt the wiccan to see her mentor so upset with her and she could only hope that Elidi could forgive her. “A lot happened....I have a lot to explain....I’m willing to accept any punishment you think I deserve....but for now could we sit down?” She knew that her legs wouldn’t hold her up when she got emotional. Following Elidi and Tamryn into the living room she furrowed her brows seeing the mess she’d left. At the time she hadn’t paid much attention to the chaos she’d created in the witches home. But now seeing the damage she felt even worse.

As she sat down across from the duo she found herself unable to look them in the eyes. Instead she stared down at her lap, which her hands were folded atop of. Taking a deep breath she pulled herself together and began explaining her past. Knowing that it was important they know her background. So they would understand what had just occured a few nights ago. She briefly talked about her picture perfect life and mentioned the professor. She could feel her hands trembling from just speaking his name. She hated this control he had over her, despite that she didn’t stop. Moving along she explained her struggles with activating the wand, how the night in the woods went down. What happened after getting caught, how the whole town turned against her. All about how she was tormented out of college and then the town, how she came to Tabula to escape. Throughout speaking she’d look up every now and again but then when she’d feel herself tearing up she’d stare back down and wipe at her eyes. The professor came back up and it was obvious that Kiki feared the man. Her bottom lip trembled whenever she spoke of him and she began fidgeting with her hands. It took everything in her to mention the rape and she was quick about it not wanting to linger on the topic. By the end of that she was proud of herself for not getting sick, not that she had anything on her stomach to throw up anyway. She’d only cried a bit and managed to hold herself together fairly well. Now came the hardest part, why she’d broken into Elidis home.

She kept her eyes locked on her fidgeting hands in her lap. She told the two about how the town turned against her family. How she was trying to get money to help them move to Tabula. She mentioned that’s why she was trying to sell charms to begin with. Admitted how foolish it was of her not to accept Tamryns help when she offered money, she had been stubborn. Managing to get all of that said without breaking into tears, she looked up momentarily as though to see if they were still listening. Seeing that their eyes seemed to be focused on her and looked back down. Kiki spoke of the text she had gotten from her mother and how she thought Elidi could teleport them their to save them. How when Elidi wasn’t home she panicked and decided to attempt the spell herself. She found the spell and gathered all of the items. A small sob escaped her lips when she admitted that she was too late. How her house was completely burned and her caregivers bodies were charred. The conversation she barely remembered with the cops and then how the professor showed up. Near the end she had started to cry and her breathing became ragged but she kept speaking despite all her stuttering. By the time she finished she was a blubbering, shaking mess. Refusing to look up she frantically tried wiping away at the tears that poured out of her eyes. “I....am...s...so...sorry...” she managed to gasp out a pitiful apology to the one who she’d hurt.