#anyway im off to make the INSIDES!!!!!!!THIS TOOK ME THREE HOURS
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vanweezer · 6 months ago
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got bored & started a cw(e)m zine
the only problem is my printer made the logo come out blue. should i keep it how it iz or should i paint over it
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i typically dont ask for rbs on these things so i wont, but if youre in stone sour/slipknot fandom perhaps rb? id like to hear yalls opinion <3heart emoji
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hwaflms · 6 months ago
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HAPPY NOW? ★ [ j.jh ]
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your family has been pressuring you for months to bring your boyfriend, jaehyun, over for dinner, and you think it’s really sweet that they like him so much. the only problem is that your “boyfriend” jaehyun, hates you.
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[☆] PAIRING. ex!jaehyun x f!reader
[☆] GENRE. angst, smut, fluff | fake dating?, exes to ??? au
[☆] WC. 19.9k (i don’t even know)
[☆] WARNINGS. angst, reader has anxiety, mentions of anxiety attacks, fighting, reader be lying a lot, reader has a little sister, crying, reader is kind of a dumbass, explicit content (piv smut), unprotected sex (don’t do this gang!), fingering, sex in public kinda, pls lmk if i forgot anything!!
[☆] NOTES. i’m so fucking annoyed with tumblr it’s not letting me insert images properly UGH this took me over 2 hours to upload man 🗣️ im pretty proud of this one ‼️ idek how it got this long but it’s my longest fic yet and it’s been sitting in my drafts for ages until i finally got the inspo to write it :p i want jaehyun so bad it’s not even funny tbh but anyway PLS GIVE ME FEEDBACK/A REBLOG LITERALLY ANYTHING IS APPRECIATED <33
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six months.
you haven't seen this door in six months.
it's funny because, this was a door you used to push open and walk through every other day, yet now you stand on the opposite side of it, unsure as to whether you should even be thinking of knocking.
your hand is raised to the door, shaped like a fist but you make no move to actually knock. you were aware that you still had time to bail out of this, that you could turn on your heel and make your merry way back to your sad little house and go back to pretending you're happy with the choice you made six months ago.
or you could just do what you came all the way here to do.
the weather seems to be in your favour, at least. the sun shines radiantly, making the temperature warm, but not too warm, and a cool breeze travels through the air in short intervals. the summer had begun early, birds chirping in their habitual singsong way and wild bougainvillea already flowering in various shades of pink and lilac. usually when the day starts off with good weather, the rest of it follows suit, and thus your day is made better. hopefully, this is the case for you today.
pausing for a short, morale-boosting intake of air, you tighten your fist and knock, knock, knock on the mahogany door, immediately regretting your decision as you feel your stomach churn and plummet. a good ten seconds pass, and you hear no reply nor movement from the inside of the house, and part of you is relieved because that means he may not be home.
more than happy to do a 180° and skip along joyously back to the metro that would take you home, your feet begin to make for that trip but your mind decides against it. you know that you are being overly dramatic, but even with being aware of this, your heart rate does not slow down one bit. you also know that what you've come here to do is more than just selfish, its pathetic and rather embarrassing. it's also a hugely unsavoury request, and if your roles were reversed, you'd most definitely laugh in his face and shut the door.
finally somewhat making up your mind with a quiet groan, you raise your clenched fist and rap against his front door again in a set of three. you nervously shift your weight from your right to your left foot, then back to your right and then once again to your left, the anxiety and anticipation not allowing you to stand still and relax, thinking that if he doesn't answer this time, you really will just return home.
"hold on, i'm coming!", a hurried, muffled voice calls from inside the house and you don't think your heart has ever beaten this fast in your life. not even during the one time you ran a marathon to prove a point to your friend chenle, and while you did show him that you didn't only run to get away from spiders, your body took its own sweet time to recover from that.
now you hear footsteps approaching the door from the opposite side of it, and you don't think you can handle anymore of this tortuous, build up of a wait because you are quite literally one step away from calling it a day and just sprinting your way out of there, just like you did on the last few metres of the aforementioned marathon, and you know he's nearing the door because the footsteps are getting clearer and clearer, and soon he's going to open the door, take one look at you and just slam the door right in your face, but not before spewing verbal explosives at you, which would be totally deserved since he has every right to just spit on you and tell you how you're a terrible, downright horrible human being completely unworthy of forgiveness and-
"sorry for making you wait so long, i was-"
if your heart rate was at its maximum speed before, now it just stopped.
standing in front of you, in the flesh, was the man who's heart you broke six months ago.
jaehyun had just about opened his door in a way that his body was sticking halfway out of it, but he was now frozen in that position, neither in nor out, just stuck there looking like he was contemplating his next move. he adorned a loose, white shirt that clung to his defined shoulders and chest, paired with a pair of red plaid pants with a patch of some different material stitched just above where his knee was. you'd recognise those pants just about anywhere, having worn them a number of times and being the cause of that strange patch with mismatched material (you'd tried to balance a pot of steaming hot ramen on your knee in order to move something, resulting in it causing a burn in the pant).
his attire tells you that he was either just about to eat breakfast, in the process of eating breakfast, or about to finish breakfast; jaehyun was not an early riser and he liked to take his time getting ready for the day.
apart from his slightly changed hair, jaehyun looks the same as he did before, if not better. his once shorter, straight, brown hair, was now a darker kind of black and longer in a silky, mullet-y, layered sort of way, the mullet part stopping just above where his shirt met his neck and the front bits falling on to his face in thin, soft wisps.
everything about the man was captivating and entrancing, but if you had to pick a specific feature that really takes the cake, it would have to be his eyes. his eyes, deep-set and fierce, always gave the impression that he was cold or unapproachable, whereas in reality, he was the opposite. as striking as they may be, they always carried a certain warmth to them.
while they still held the same intensity to them, the warmth was missing as he looked straight at you now. after the brief moment of confusion when he first opened the door dissipated, the familiarity had sunk in, and his expression now was more or less unreadable, but you still tried to make out what he was thinking and feeling- was it shock? anger? maybe even disgust?
"okay, are you going to just stand there or are you going to say something?"
you think it was largely a combination of the last two. in all your fidgeting and gawking, you'd forgotten to actually speak to the man who's door you'd just knocked on, leaving him standing there wordless and confused, an eyebrow raised as he waited for you to open your mouth.
you try to do so, so many words wanting to tumble out your mouth but an invisible gate seems to block it, so now you're just stood still with your mouth opening and closing soundlessly, looking like an idiot.
c'mon y/n, fucking say something, anything-
"how have you been?", is what you decide to go with to break the silence in the end, an awkward smile plastered on to your face. you realise before the sentence is even fully out of your mouth that that would be a really weird thing to start off with, seeing as you and jaehyun have had absolutely zero contact for six months, and are obviously not on the most wonderful terms.
jaehyun's eyebrows furrow, a look of clear disbelief on his face as he clutches his door handle a little tighter. he looks away with a sarcastic smile, shaking his head before turning back to look you dead in the eye. oh, he's going to slam the door on you, you just know it-
"really? 'how have you been'?", he questions incredulously, licking his bottom lip while an exasperated smile plays at them. funnily enough, his response is somewhat relieving to your pitiful self, because you weren't even expecting to hear a reply to what you said, you figured he'd just walk away. you would've. "we haven't seen each for six months since we broke up and 'how have you been' is the best you've got?"
you wince apologetically and bite your lip, playing with your fingers nervously as he quite literally stares you down, irritation written all over his face.
he waits a couple more beats for you to break the tense silence and speak but you are inwardly (and outwardly) struggling to word your thoughts, so he simply scoffs and backs away to return inside.
"okay wait, i didn't tell my family that we broke up and they keep pressuring me to bring you home for the holidays, so i would really like if you'd pretend you don't hate me and come with me."
you don't even want to open your eyes to witness his reaction to your blurted little confession, so you merely stand, frozen in place with your eyes squeezed shut tightly. a couple seconds pass yet you don't hear a door slam, a good sign, so you take that as an affirmative to open your eyes.
he doesn't say anything, or do anything either really, he just leans against his doorframe with another indecipherable expression. this irks you even though you know you have no right to feel irked, but the fact that you once had the ability to know what he was thinking and now don't bothers you to the core. plus, it leaves you feeling unsure as to whether to continue. he might just start laughing at you manically or angrily tell you to get off his property like some bitter, 60-year-old man, and either of these scenarios would be completely fair of him to do.
the heavy realisation that your request sounded absolutely delusional and conceited dawns upon you, and something about his irksome expression makes you feel like you should keep talking. "you have literally every right to just tell me to fuck off, and i don't even expect an answer, i don't really know why i even came here, oh my god- this is so fucking stupid, i'm so fucking stupid and honestly i don't know why you're still standing here listening to me ramble-"
"i need to get ready then. give me ten minutes."
✧ ──────── ✧ ──────── ✧
the front door you're stood at now holds a very different ambience to the previous one. while jaehyun's was quiet and peaceful, the front door to your parents house reveals that the inside is just bustling with activity. the chorus of kate bush's 'running up that hill' plays faintly from behind the door, so you figured that your dad must have brought out his old record player from the dusty attic.
jaehyun stands beside you, hands shoved into the pockets of his light grey hoodie that you feel he must be boiling in, because you're wearing a black tank top with some loose cargoes that you think you might have drenched with sweat.
the sweat would be from the burning heat, but also from the agitation you're really starting to feel. there are so many different ways this dinner could go. what if jaehyun suddenly tells them the truth? then everyone in the room would hate you, and rightly so. you don't want to have to explain to your parents why you broke up with him; it's a stupid fucking reason, if you can even call it that, and it made you completely miserable. how were you supposed explain to your little sister that you and jaehyun aren't together anymore? you suppose relationships are a totally foreign concept to her young mind, but you were sure that she knew you and jaehyun loved each other very much. and you knew she loved jaehyun very much.
he does not look at you, instead choosing to really focus on the christmas themed welcome mat that your parents put out during the winter of '09 and never bothered to change. how he even agreed to come here with you, you don't know, but to say you're grateful would be an understatement.
"you still have time to back out, you know.", you mumble softly, trying to give him one more chance to escape, but he doesn't even spare you a glance, shaking his head and squinting at the door.
"let's just get this over with."
with a small sigh, your raise your hand to press your parents doorbell, the embarrassingly loud 'ding dong' ringing out from behind the door. "oh, that must be her!", you hear the muffled voice of your father speak from the inside, making a slight smile form on your lips.
within a couple seconds, you hear the sound of the muted metal bolt as your dad struggles to open the door to let you in. a grunt of "this damn door..." makes both you and jaehyun release short giggles, and you peek over at jaehyun to see his lips curl upwards into a smile, a small one but it's still breathtakingly pretty . he clears his throat and it's gone in a flash, but the image doesn't leave your mind, and you're still seeing it when your dad finally manages to open the door. "i really need to start using the new lock", he mutters, shifting his eyes to you with a big grin, leaving against the doorframe with his arms folded. "hello, sweetheart."
you chuckle and throw your arms around him, squeezing him a little as he laughs and pats your back in return. releasing you, he turns to jaehyun with a smile, who promptly sticks his hand out politely. "hello, mr. l/n, long time no see."
your dad ignores his hand, throwing his head back with a gruff laugh. "what's with all the formalities, come here, son.", and with that he gives jaehyun a hug as well, a slightly shorter one albeit, but a hug nonetheless. the word 'son' repeats in your mind like an echo, sounding more and more distorted the longer you focus on it. you can't even begin to think of what was going through jaehyun's mind. this was not your brightest idea.
you notice your mom waiting by the door with her hands behind her back, eyes bright and shiny. "hi, mom.", you beam, and she laughs cheerily, opening her arms for you to run into, which you do. she presses numerous kisses to the crown of your head, making you groan lightheartedly and try to escape her hold, but it only tightens. "oh, how i've missed you."
"i missed you too, mom.", you say but she's already let you go and is making a bee line for jaehyun with her arms open, who falls into the hug so readily and comfortably. "i may have missed you, y/n, but i missed jaehyun ten times more.", she jokes, pinching jaehyun's cheeks affectionately.
jaehyun is turning bright red, but he has a toothy grin on his face, a real one, you can tell. his eyes travel the front room where all of you are stood with a nostalgic smile, having not seen it or your parents in over six months. you watch as they look from the various photo frames hung up on the wall alongside the staircase, to the curtains that they recently changed, finally landing on the record player thay was sitting on the table. "wow, mr. l/n, where did you get this?", jaehyun asks, and you wonder whether he's trying to make conversation or if he's genuinely curious. you think it may be the second one.
while him and your dad engage in small talk about his record player, you turn to your mom to ask of the whereabouts of your little sister, and as if on cue, you hear an excited squeal from the top of the stairs. all four heads turn to see your sister bounding down the stairs hurriedly, paying no mind to your mom's strained shout of "careful!".
"y/n!", she piped, finally reaching the bottom of the stairs and running straight to you, wrapping her arms around your legs. she barely reaches your hip so her hug is really just her face pressed into your thigh with her arms squeezing your legs together, while you pat the top of her head.
somehow managing to pry her off of your legs, you kneel and give her a proper hug in return, now happy that you made the decision to come home for a bit of your holiday. she lets go and reaches into her pocket, pulling out a crumpled piece of paper and jutting her hand out to you, urging you to take it.
you smile and furrow your eyebrows with confusion but you take the paper anyway, opening it as carefully as you could so as to not tear it anywhere. smoothing it out flat on your knee, you're greeted with a drawing; two people stand holding hands under a deep blue sky, a large yellow sun shining in one corner along with some "birds" that are really just little 'v's scribbled in black. they're stood on a beach, at least you think they are because there are two shades of blue on the paper, one of them probably being the blue hue of the ocean.
you assume the two people are you and your sister, since one of them has shorter, shoulder length hair and is miniscule compared to the other person, who's hair length and height are similar to yours.
you hold the picture to your chest and pull your sister in for another heartfelt hug, kissing her temple. "is this us?", you ask her, pointing at the two people in the drawing. she gives you a proud nod in return, taking the picture from your hands and holding it in front of her face. "yup! the big girl is you and the small girl is me! we're gonna go swimming.", she informs you, flashing you the toothiest of smiles. "thank you, it's perfect.", you tell her, ruffling her hair a little as she hands you the drawing back.
she clearly doesn't appreciate that, because she whines and swats your hands away, but soon her eyes focus on something behind you and they enlarge, the second excited squeal of the day emerging from her lips. "jae!", she just about screams, completely abandoning you in favour of running off to jaehyun, who has a wide smile on his face and looks equally as happy as her. he scoops her up in his arms and lifts her in front of his face, doing a little spin as peals of laughter escape her.
he finally puts her down but she holds on to his hand, looking at the male with absolute adoration. "hi, cutie.", he boops her nose affectionately to which she giggles, turning to look at you. "you didn't tell me jaehyun was coming!"
"i wasn't sure if he could make it", you reply to her honestly, looking at jaehyun as you speak because only the two of you know what you really mean by that. he holds your eye contact for perhaps a millisecond longer than he did before, but again, it was gone in a flash. he clears his throat a little and straightens up, rocking back on his heels.
sensing a shift in the air but mistaking it for some form of awkwardness, your mother shoos the rest of your family away in the direction of the kitchen. "they probably want to freshen up together, let's let them do that."
once they're gone, it feels like you can finally release your breath, truly seeing this situation going wrong in so many ways. they don't suspect anything yet, but how much longer until they eventually connect the dots? or what if they don't even need to do that, because jaehyun only agreed so he could embarrass you by telling them the whole story? you don't acknowledge the tense silence until jaehyun speaks up. "can i use the guest bathroom? still the second door on the right, yeah?"
you don't respond immediately because you're processing the fact that he still remembers these minute details. you also realise he's only asking because he doesn't want to share your bathroom with you, and that clears your thoughts up a little. you nod in affirmation and he begins climbing up the stairs, and you wait until you hear he's reached the upstairs landing before you move.
it's so tense. the last time you were in this house with jaehyun, you had taken a short road trip to get there. you say road trip, but it was just a couple hours long, but the playlist you and jaehyun had curated said otherwise. you arrived at the house and everyone was all smiles, your parents just happy to have you home and happy to see him as well. you think that part's just as hard as thinking about the two of you together. the fact that your slightly judgemental parents adored him, your little sister looked at him with stars in her eyes– you had lucked out in every department, and you were always aware of it, the joint guilt you felt from breaking it off and lying to your parents really getting to you now.
you swore that after this was over, you would apologise to jaehyun and finally break the truth to your parents.
finishing off in the bathroom, you step out into the hall, only to bump straight into jaehyun. backing up awkwardly, you both try to get past each but keep going in the same direction, resulting in a bunch of 'sorry–'s and 'wait– just–'s being blurted out by the two of you. finally getting past you, he doesn't look back at you again, just walking down the stairs mumbling something about "they're waiting...".
wincing, you make your way down the stairs as well, arriving at the living room to see your mom standing beside your dad with an excited expression on her face. you approach with caution, noting that your dad has his hands behind his back. "so...", your mother starts, raising her shoulders a little out of anticipation. "since we haven't seen the two of you in a while...we got you some presents! nothing too grand but..."
"mom, it's not even christmas", you whine, ready to argue with them because you feel bad that whatever they got was still overpriced, but your mother shakes her head, urging your dad to reveal the presents. "just take a look first..."
in one hand he holds a small, white box, no bigger than his palm, and your mom picks it up, holding it out to you. the print on the box is small and typewriter-like, the material it's made out of just screaming fancy. you narrow your eyes at your parents but take the box in your hand anyway, pushing it open. inside, it reveals maybe the prettiest necklace you've seen; dainty and silver, the chain is simple but it's the pendant that's the real charm– it's an uncut stone of some kind, a pale, translucent white crystal that's pretty much shapeless but it's wrapped in this thin silver wire that forms little loops and hearts over the stone and it makes it so alluring.
"it's a seaglass necklace", your mom speaks, taking the necklace out of its box for you and inclining her head for you to turn around. you're now facing jaehyun, who looks curiously at the new piece of jewellery with the faintest of smiles on his face. pushing your hair to the side, your mother places the necklace around your neck and clasps it (though it takes her a while, squinting and looking at the necklace hook from every angle because she forgot to wear her reading glasses). she leads you to the mirror by the entrance of the hall so you could get a better look at the necklace hanging on top of your collarbones, reaching up to touch it. "you remember? from that lady who owned the fancy place by the beach last summer?"
you do remember. that was the first trip jaehyun had joined you and your family for, under the suggestion of your little sister. when you brought up the fact that jaehyun was going back home to see his parents a little later than he had anticipated, your sister immediately asked if he would want to come with all of you, who were heading to the beach in a day or two for a little family getaway. and much to your surprise, your parents were very warm to the idea of jaehyun accompanying the lot of you. he must have severely impressed them the first time he met them, bringing a bouquet of flowers for your mother and a hearty bottle of whiskey for your dad– it's like he had won their hearts before he had even stepped inside the house.
of course, he had met them a couple more times again after that, but your parents had never raised any issues about your then boyfriend. your dad had claimed that he wanted jaehyun to come along so he could "keep an eye on him" and "see how he treats you in front of us", but you knew all too well he just wanted someone to talk to about his interest in sound systems. the trip had gone so smoothly, so perfectly and you think that it had planted the seeds of doubt in your mind about your relationship.
the position of the window and sun allowed for the light to bleed on to half of your face, the necklace glinting under the rays as you stood in front of the mirror and surveyed it. the last couple drops of the golden hour sun slipped through the windowpane and painted your skin like it was a canvass and the necklace was the cherry on top. you were radiant, and the look in jaehyun's eyes told you that he knew it too. when your eyes meet in the mirror, it's like he tears his eyes away from you, forcing himself to look at his shoes.
snapping out of your soon-to-be miserable thoughts, you fix a smile on to your face so as to not seem ungrateful, turning to hug your mother. "i love it", and you really do, knowing that you wouldn't be wearing a single other piece of jewellery for the next couple months.
jaehyun stands in the doorway soundlessly, just taking in the scene. he had always told you that he wished his family was as close and tight-knit as yours, but due to his dad always being away on some business trip or another and his mother having her own job to attend to, it resulted in a lot of time spent by himself.
you think that might be way he slotted right in with the rest of you, from the very first meet, because his desire to belong worked very well with your family's lively, chaotic home, which welcomed him right away. this was the main reason why couldn’t bring yourself to tell your family that you had broken up him mercilessly. they wouldn’t blame you of course, but you know everyone would be immensely disappointed when they realised that he hadn’t even done anything wrong in the first place; he was so good to you, and they just wanted to see you happy.
while your mom cooed at how pretty the necklace looked on you, your dad faces jaehyun with a wide grin on his face. "you didn't think we'd forget about you, did you?"
he probably wasn't expecting anything for himself, because you weren't either, so you and jaehyun simultaneously furrow your eyebrows. "oh, mr. l/n, you didn't have to–", he starts but your father is quick to cut him off, waving his hands. "what nonsense. of course we had to get you something, it's no big deal", he tries to appear nonchalant but the smile that creeps on to his face is a telltale sign that it is, in fact, a big deal. "besides, if you're family to y/n, you're family to us."
it's as if someone just stuck a large knife into you, the pang you just felt in your stomach. you can't even begin to think about what must be going through jaehyun's head, because even he can't hide the way his eyes soften at your dad's words. watching your sister spring up from the couch, she runs behind your father and plucks whatever he was holding out of his hands, now revealed to be a medium-sized bag. "i wanna give it to jaehyun!", with that, she's running over to him with the toothiest smile plastered on her cheeks, holding the bag out to jaehyun with stretched arms.
he ruffles her hair just like you did, but she makes absolutely zero complaints as he does it– if anything she's revelling in it. this makes you want to scoff, but you smile instead without thinking about it, taking a couple steps away from the mirror and towards them. "are you gonna open it or should i take it back to the store?", your dad jokes and jaehyun chuckles quietly while you don't even bother forcing a laugh, and he takes the bag from your sister's hands, mumbling a soft 'thank you'.
from where you're standing, you can't see what's inside the bag, but you can see jaehyun's eyes widen when he looks inside and back up at everyone. "me and mrs. l/n, i can't take this."
"of course you can", your mother tuts in response, dismissing him with her hand. "if i recall correctly, you had said something about your airpods not working properly?"
realisation dawns on your face when jaehyun pulls the shiny headphones from the bag, turning them over in his hand. "i think i did mention it, yeah...", he nods, eyes scanning over the clear box he holds. you remember that only one of his airpods would function properly, the other deciding whenever it wanted to do its job. you didn't realise your parents remembered, as well. "but these are so expensive, i can't–"
"do you like them or not?", your dad asks, shrugging his shoulders. jaehyun's quick to nod, "yes, i love them but–"
"then end of story." your father's not hearing anyone out, even going so far as to cover his ears jokingly when jaehyun opens his mouth again. after your sister tugs on his pant leg and urges him to try them out, jaehyun slips them over his ears, whipping his phone to connect them to it. he thought it was too expensive to try fixing his airpods so he resorted to listening with just the one ear in, or using your headphones till you broke up.
by the look on his face, they work just fine, and he couldn't be happier. a wide smile is pressed on his face, a real one that doesn't even drop when he makes eye contact with you. you smile back at him slowly, but he doesn't look away immediately, slowly turning to look at your parents. "i don't know what to say. thank you."
you'd had a couple boyfriends before, not none as close to your family as jaehyun had been. none of your previous relationships had lasted very long and you could never pinpoint the exact reason why, you just knew at some point that you had to break it off. your mother always thought that this was a result of your first ever relationship, the first and last man that ever dumped you. it crushed you at the time, though you were able to power through, but since then, relationships were never your strong suit. change seemed promising when you met jaehyun through a mutual friend, however. he was kind, he was smart and he was genuine, three traits that you didn't typically see in guys you dated, but you didn't see any reason to dwell on your biggest fumble yet.
the rest of time until dinner continues in a steadfast manner with all of you sitting in the living room. the scene looked like something out of a corny movie montage, but the beautiful part of it was that it was reality, all the laughs, the eye-smiles, the stupid jokes and conversations, all of it. your parents had recently returned from a holiday together that they took to celebrate their wedding anniversary, which meant that you two deserved to look through all eight hundred and sixty two of the photos they took. super proud of the new projector he had ordered off amazon, your dad had connected his phone to it and was going through his gallery slideshow-style, with your mom making offhand comments about every other photo.
"that's from when we went on a date to this fancy restaurant, that's from the shoe store your dad wanted to go to...oh! that's when your dad just learnt how to take 0.5x pictures on his new phone!"
your mom speaks animatedly while each photo is being shown, pointing out various different things without any prompting. there were badly taken selfies of your parents that made both you and jaehyun laugh, pictures of the different kinds of food they ate, the said 0.5's of your mother taken from the top of her forehead– your dad was slapping his knee even though your mom wasn't too impressed.
after what seemed like years, they ran out of vacation pictures and moved on to pictures and videos taken during your little sister's talent show. this was especially endearing, because your normally high-energy sister was suddenly all shy and avoidant of eye contact in the presence of jaehyun, particularly displeased with a video of her singing on stage.
jaehyun wipes the pout right off her face however, poking her cheek with a smile. "you sound amazing, s/n", he pipes genuinely, and she's back to smiling again, even offering to sing the song for everyone towards the end. no one has the heart to turn down so innocent a request, so for the next couple minutes you are subjected to a very slightly off-key rendition of some song from the movie 'frozen'. everyone cheers when she is done, jaehyun even throwing in a little "whoo!" for good measure, and your sister performs a small curtsey before seating herself between you and jaehyun's legs.
you're situated on the same couch, but only so that things don't look weird. you invited him here to pose as your boyfriend, and he agreed, so you have to play the part too. that part wasn't as hard as you expected, the acting like a couple, no, it was the avoiding questions that was really getting to you. at some point in the conversation, your dad had congenially asked jaehyun when the next time he'd be coming home was. normally, he would congenially reply with something like "as soon as possible", but this time, he just froze. he appeared to attempt a reply, but was cut short at "uh–", the rest of the sentence never following through.
hoping to repair the awkward moment, you start to construct a fib. "jaehyun's been uh– you know, working at one of those um, nursing homes–", this is too out-of-the-box a reply even for jaehyun who turns to you, trying and failing to the hide incredulous look on his face.
"a nursing home? oh, i didn't know you were training to be a nurse!", your mother is surprised but definitely not disappointed, placing her hand on her chest with a sympathetic look on her face as she looks at jaehyun. he looks as if he's trying to speak to you using only his eyes, widening and squinting them at a rapid pace, tilting his head towards you so your parents don't see his expression. there are clear signs of confusion and you're aware he's questioning your decisions, but that's as far as you get with his eye signals and you let him know by shrugging and wincing, so he closes them while sighing inwardly and turns to face your parents, a fake smile stuck on his lips.
"yes! haha, funny story, this one...", he grits his teeth but furthers your stupid concoction of a story, snapping his fingers while trying to think. "i'm not really training to be a nurse, i just volunteer there sometimes. love being around old people, you know, makes me feel full of life–"
you cut him off before he can make this even worse for the both of you, taking in your mother's furrowed eyebrows and your dad's slightly opened mouth. "yes, well, it's hard for him to catch a break, you know, with all the...", you slap your hand over his knee and give it a little squeeze, turning to him with a grin while he smiles tightly back at you, eyes focusing on the hand on his thigh without changing his expression. "...hard work he does."
jaehyun's eyes don't leave your hand, seeing as this is the first act of skinship in six months, albeit casual. your hand feels so hot that you think you might be burning a hole through the material of jaehyun's jeans, finally ripping your hand off of him.
"of course...", your father trails off in confusion, and no one can seem to make head or tails of the situation. in a moment, your mother pauses before clapping her hands, seemingly already forgotten about the strange situation as she chimes "dinner in five!~". your sister scampers off with claims of helping your mother out in the kitchen (and probably to try and secure a spot close to you and jaehyun), and jaehyun stands up and heads to the cupboard containing all your placemats without out even being asked. you offer to help but he shakes his head, and you opt to go sit back down on one of the arm chairs facing the kitchen area, just observing.
this was one of jaehyun's qualities that made you fall in love with him, but also pissed you off to no end. first of all, didn't he ever get tired of just being so good all the time? second of all, why couldn't his own parents see what everyone else saw in him? and thirdly, why did you choose to ruin your life six months ago? as for the last one, you knew why, but the extent of your stupidity was real apparent to you now.
you look away when he meets your eyes and catches you, your heart beating fast when you see out of the corner of your eye that his gaze lingers for a moment or two. underneath all that hatred, was there still a small part of him that cared about you? after you broke up with him, over call that too, he attempted to call you back two or three times, but you couldn't bring yourself to pick up. out of fear or maybe even shame, you never answered his calls and since then, you'd had no contact.
it was impossible. with a break-up like that and six month's worth of time to sit and think about it, you imagine that one could hold a surprising amount of hatred for someone–especially after a relationship as real as yours. if you switched the roles, you think you wouldn't feel much different.
at your mom's signal, you heave yourself off the couch and to the dining table, seating yourself next to jaehyun (everyone expected you to sit with him, they left the chair empty on purpose). your sister has already claimed the spot opposite jaehyun and was patiently awaiting the vegetables that she knew your mother was going to pile on her plate, a little pout forming on her lips at the sight of broccoli. "you can't make that face every time, like i'm feeding you dog food", your mother scolds her with a smile, giving her a generous helping of veggies. the pout deepens and she folds her arms with a cross look on her face. "you guys don't have to eat the broccoli. why do i?"
she's got a point, you think, but before you can tell her to just eat them, jaehyun speaks. "that's exactly what my little cousin sungchan said...", jaehyun tells her, looking around the table with a dramatic sigh. "and we all know what happened to him..."
little cousin sungchan? as far as you know, there is no little cousin sungchan, and you know a lot about jaehyun's family, so you put your fork down in favour of listening to his story at the same time your sister curiously asks, "what happened?".
"well, like you, sungchan didn't like eating his veggies", starting off the story with a shrug under your mother's listening ears, he talks in a low voice. "he'd always argue with my aunt till one day, he refused to eat them.
your sister is knocking food around her plate while she listened to jaehyun, and she's not impressed with the story so far. "see! why can't i do that?", she asks indignantly, and your mother shoots jaehyun a look to which he winced and continues. "nothing happened for a while, so sungchan thought he had proved his point. but he hadn't heard of the veggie monster."
the story is heading in such a stupid direction that you almost laugh out loud, but you catch yourself when you notice your sister's expression, guarded and wary. "...the veggie monster? ...that's not real...", she speaks like she's not fully sure of her words herself, pausing her attack on her food.
"sungchan thought that too", jaehyun agrees, lowering his voice like one would when telling a scary story, looking around him like it could be listening before continuing, for the story's sake. "but he didn't know that without veggies, a child's body is weak. their bones don't grow strong, they stay small and their minds aren't sharp at all. that's how the veggie monster chooses his targets."
you hold back a snort at your sister's wide-eyed expression and how serious jaehyun looks, he's even got your dad attempting to look nonchalant as he followed the story. "the less veggies a kid eats, the weaker they get, and that's easy pickings for the veggie monster. he comes late at night, and there's no point in hiding because he knows. he can smell when a kid doesn't have enough vitamins and it makes him hungry."
with your sister, your parents and even you hanging on to every word, jaehyun lowers his voice to almost a whisper, and all of you lean in closer to listen. "legend has it that he looks so scary that you lose the ability to move or speak, so he just takes you. sungchan was never seen again. the police said he was missing but i knew what happened to him."
you have to admit, jaehyun can tell a story. the atmosphere felt more eerie as he concluded the story cryptically, but your sister looks positively gutted. "did he take him?", she questions, face white and voice small. he nods slowly, like he didn't want to be talking about this, and all you can think about is how this man deserved an award after the show he put on. "i had my suspicions. no one believed me, but i'm ninety-nine percent sure that at dinner, i saw a pair of dark, red eyes staring straight into the kitchen from the window."
as if nature was a paid fucking actor, a slight crash sounds from outside the window on cue, like if a cat knocked over a plastic bin, but you're pretty sure your sister shit her pants. you've never seen her shovel vegetables into her mouth at that kind of record speed before, even your parents are looking at her astounded. with her food in her mouth, she pleads with glazed eyes, "please– i'm sorry, i'll have my veggies, don't let him take me!"
it takes all of you a little while to convince your sister that she'd be completely fine if she ate all the veggies given to her and that the veggie monster wouldn't even think of her, but it's safe to say that she'd never leave a bit of stray carrot on her plate ever again. your mom comically mouths 'thank you' to jaehyun which makes you laugh, and you turn to smile at him, and he gives you a nod in return. small steps, you think, because a nod is a whole lot better than a glare.
the rest of the dinner continues as if nothing changed. sure, you and jaehyun knew things were different, but it didn't fully feel like it at the moment. your mom had prepared a lot of nice food for the occasion, and your dad even helped, particularly proud of the way his stir fry turned out. jaehyun made sure to compliment both your parents on their cooking, and they all but melted– he still knew exactly how to talk to them. conversation was easy; you talked about work, you talked about how university was going, you talked about the school play your sister was going to take part in, about jaehyun's parents, nothing was forced.
you'd fall into comfortable silences at times in favour of sitting back and observing, listening, just being a part of the moment. for someone who was so reluctant to be here, jaehyun seems comfortable, the familiarity of the situation helping ease the tension between the two of you. expecting some bumps along the way, you were rather pleased with how things were turning out, but you were also anticipating the end of the lovely evening– where you and jaehyun would eventually go your separate ways. you don't want to think about it just yet, not when everything was going so smoothly, and your opportunity to snap out of your thoughts is presented to you, just not in the way you would have liked.
your mother's question seems to have thrown jaehyun for a loop as well, because his eyebrows are furrowed and he looks blatantly confused. at some point during a lull in the conversation, your mother had politely asked jaehyun how his christmas in japan had gone; the only problem with this question was that he never had a christmas in japan, not to his knowledge anyway. this, was yet another lie you had told your parents, when they had asked why jaehyun hadn't accompanied you home to celebrate christmas, like he had originally planned to. unbeknownst to them, you had already broken up with him prior to the christmas holidays, so jaehyun wasn't exactly going to come along anyway. so, you told them that he had to spend christmas with an aunt in japan, for familial reasons.
you didn't exactly have time to prep jaehyun and give him a run down of every single lie he had to play along with, so he turns to you with a look of uncertainty and desperation in his eyes. "my, uh- christmas? in japan?", he puts emphasis on the two keywords, not blinking when he speaks directly to you in hopes that you would take the hint and help him out.
"yeah, your christmas. in japan. with your aunt", you reply to him with the same tone and expression as he does, trying your best to sound subtle so your parents don't catch on.
"yes, with your aunt! we were so sad to hear that you couldn't make it for christmas", your mother is unknowingly helping jaehyun catch up with the fake story, and he releases a short "ahh" during his moment of 'recollection'. "right, my real aunt who definitely lives in japan."
he grits his teeth when he talks, making you grimace and the fact that your parents look completely puzzled doesn't help. you need to save your dignity anyway, so you try to cut jaehyun off before he can make things worse. "haha, jaehyun of course she's your real aunt, silly", you awkwardly chuckle, feigning nonchalance when you bump his shoulder with your fist, wishing you could telepathically communicate with him right now, but you'd probably only be saying "please, please, please" on repeat.
he sighs but speaks up again, much to your relief. "it was slightly boring, my aunt doesn't do much", he laughs softly, fully back in character. "but you know, it's still nice to spend time with your family."
if your parents are suspicious, they don't say anything, seemingly satisfied with jaehyun's answer. dinner continues with few hitches until jaehyun insists that he washes the dishes. "it's the least i can do, after you both made such delicious food."
your mother at least tries to argue with him for a bit, but your dad is quite happy to not have to wash dishes, patting jaehyun on the back before standing up. what surprises you however, is jaehyun turning to you with the sweetest, most fake smile you've seen in a minute plastered on his face. "you mind helping, y/n?"
smiling tightly, you nod and begin clearing the table. this is done in silence, neither of you even looking at each other as you pick up dishes and carry them to the kitchen. your sister has run off to the living room to watch some t.v with your dad, and it feels like you're finally allowed to breathe when your mother exits the room as you’re picking up the last dirty dish. walking into the kitchen, jaehyun's back is facing you while he washes dishes, the environment and the little tune he's humming making everything seem so domestic in your eyes. this is how dinner used to always go when he came over, with you and him washing the dishes together in the end, taking breaks to splash each other with the soapy water or making out secretly by the counter.
but the air is foreign now, none of the former warmth or softness remaining. he turns to you with a frown when you place the final dish on the side of the sink, and he really doesn't look too happy. "visiting an aunt in japan? really?", he scoffs, looking incredulous while you look sheepish, avoiding his eye contact entirely.
you were expecting something like this but you hated being put on the spot. "i don't know, okay, what else was i supposed to say?", the exasperation in your voice is evident but it only fuels jaehyun, and rightfully so.
"i got an idea, how about 'oh, he can't come because i dumped his ass over call for no reason, sorry'?", he digs snidely, voice laden with scorn. there it is. "or is that too close to the truth for you?"
he doesn’t even let you open your mouth, chucking the cloth he was using to dry the dishes on the counter somewhere, folding his arms while he looks at you in a hostile way. “you wanna know how i really spent my christmas, y/n?”, he sneers sardonically, a sarcastic smile etched on to his lips. “alone in my house. miserable. i wish i had an aunt in fucking japan that i could’ve spent it with.”
you hate to admit it, but his words sting and you are well aware that you deserve it. just asking him to join you for this dinner was a huge reach, a request you really didn't expect him to accept. you don't fully understand why he did, though. he clearly despised you, so many be it was out of love for your family? you know jaehyun cared for them, but doing all this was uncharacteristic even for him. when you don't say anything but wear an agonised expression on your face, jaehyun further questions you.
"do you not have anything to say for yourself?", he tries again, his voice a little softer and more hopeful than before but you look like you're fighting some internal battle that doesn't involve him. he exhales deeply, clearly disappointed in your lack of an explanation and just walks past you and out of the kitchen.
you remain in the kitchen for a couple beats more, trying your level best to collect yourself. you can feel tears pricking the corners of your eyes and your breathing is quicker, but this is the absolute worst time to have a little panic attack in the kitchen. how you wished the two of you could just forget about everything for a minute so you could wrap your arms around his figure and fall into his embrace, feeling like that would solve all your problems. it's selfish and wrong, but you know that you're not getting over jaehyun anytime soon.
you'd come to that conclusion a couple months back. the first month after you broke things off with him was possibly the worst time of your life, struggling to eat, sleep or even get out of bed. your friends urged you to reach out to him like they knew you wanted to, but you remained stubborn, convinced at the time that you had made the right decision that would hurt the least for the both of you. you were wrong, you could see that now, but you knew it was much too late. you'd already gone through all the stages of grief, but seeing jaehyun again in this environment had really gone and thrown a spanner in the works for you, all because of your terrible decision-making skills.
any hopes you had of the two of you at least being on semi-friendly terms had just flown out the window as well, and you suddenly think that this might've been the reason why jaehyun even agreed to come. an explanation. a well-deserved one at that. you don't know why you find it so hard to give him one, but you suspect it's because you're not ready to face all that yourself.
upon hearing your mother faintly call out your name, you realise how long you've been standing in the kitchen, taking a couple more deep breaths before you join the rest of them. it's clear that everyone's winding down, your sister curled up on your dad's lap, trying to blink away her sleepiness, while everyone else mutedly watched the television. "didn't mean to keep you all up past your bedtime", you try to joke lightheartedly because your parents look like they're about to hit the hay themselves, but it's really so that no one suspects you were having a little breakdown in the kitchen; especially jaehyun.
"you're not wrong", your dad agrees gruffly, stretching a little before tapping on your sister's cheek to wake her, much to her displeasure. "it's technically your mama's turn to put you to bed, isn't it?", he attempts, but is quickly shot down by your mother, pinching his arm after claiming it was certainly not her turn. after their grand performance, both of them comically turn to look at you with a suspiciously bright look in their eyes. you don't even have time to argue, because the second the hint of a sigh leaves your mouth, they're saying "thank you" and "how nice of you to offer", urging your sister to wake up to let her know that you'll be tucking her in tonight.
she perks up a little at this, nodding with a little glint in her eyes. hopping off your dad's lap, she sleepily totters over to you. "can jae come too?", her voice is hopeful and small, and she yawns in the middle of her sentence but she just has this certain charm that makes everyone unable to say 'no' to her. this includes jaehyun, because one look from her with her arms raised and he's picking her up, pretending to complain about it. you can't help but smile at the whole interaction.
"oh quick! before i forget...", your mom gasps in remembrance, picking her phone up from the coffee table with a tired smile. "don't know when i'll get to see the two of you again so, pictures!"
this may be the only part you were slightly prepared for. your mother had a special affinity for taking photos; not that she was any good at it, she just enjoyed capturing these little moments and treating her gallery like a scrapbook. she had more or less documented the entirety of you and jaehyun's relationship, from the first few months where all the photos were cheesy smiles and awkward poses, to when you had grown more comfortable around each other. in fact, a photo she had taken of jaehyun was your wallpaper for quite some time (it took a lot of effort and explaining to help your mom airdrop you the picture)– it was a shot of jaehyun and your sister grinning from ear to ear, both adorning aprons that were covered in flour after a failed attempt at baking cookies.
the point being, you're pretty sure jaehyun was also expecting the pictures, so it didn't really surprise you when he plastered a smile on his face and came to stand beside you. his hand finds the small of your back soon enough and it makes your body stiffen while simultaneously sending a jolt through it, and jaehyun feels it. mistaking the action for uneasiness, he immediately lifts his warm hand off you so that it's now hovering awkwardly over your body, though no one can see that from the front. while you are disappointed, you lean into him anyway, clasping your hands together behind your back as you both give the camera wide smiles. you're so close you can smell his cologne and it's making you dizzy, not because the scent is overpowering but because it's just so familiar and you can't get enough of it.
the moment is gone in a flash because your mother takes three to four photos while cooing at the two of you before she decides to call it a night, and then jaehyun is ripping himself from you. you don't think anyone else recognises it, the way he seems to want to be as far from you as possible because he's so good at masking these things, but you can feel it. you can feel this heat radiating off of his body whenever he's near you and it's not the warm, fuzzy kind of heat. the spot on your back where his hand rested still burns a little.
your parents are exhausted and look more than happy to be able to jump straight into bed, but not before thanking you and jaehyun. you hug and kiss them goodnight, promising that your next visit will be sooner than this one before they exchange pleasantries with jaehyun, making him promise the same. you know this has to be hard on him, making a mental note to apologise profusely before you part ways. with a reminder that the door now locks from the inside, they bid you goodnight and goodbye, trudging off to their room while your sister scampers up the stairs to hers, suddenly full of life.
you understand why your parents were more than happy to hand over bedtime duties to you and your "boyfriend", because putting your little sister to bed turned out to be a piece of work. she started off by blatantly refusing to brush her teeth, but jaehyun had that one sorted when he reminded her that the veggie monster had a lot of friends, so that was done. she changed into her pyjamas all on her own which was a relief, but you were at a loss over how to actually get her into bed.
you both humoured her for a bit, understanding that she was just happy to have her big sister and her big sister's nice boyfriend home again, so a little excitement was expected. jaehyun played along with her, which was a sight to see, following along with the characters she assigned him in her imaginary games. but when bouncing on her bed turned into running around the room like a crazed bunny, it was a little harder to convince her that she needed to sleep now. "look at me, i'm wide awake", she insists, widening her eyes with her fingers to show you both just how awake she was. jaehyun tried a couple times to catch her, but you're both taken by surprise at her remarkable speed and agility. in the end, you had to resort to just sitting down and hoping that she'll tire herself out, which eventually does happen.
she climbs into bed of her own accord, rubbing at her eyes while you pull the duvet over her body, up to her shoulders. "when are you coming next?", she mumbles curiously while you sit on the edge of her bed, jaehyun standing close by. "soon", you reply honestly, knowing that you'll always have a safe place to come to whenever you need. "maybe i'll even stay for a whole weekend next time."
she likes the sound of this, smiling tiredly with her hands peeking over the edge of her cover, holding it closer to her. "will you come too?", this question is directed towards jaehyun, who looks defeated when he opens his mouth to answer. it's not fair, expecting him to lie to your family like this, but you know you've gotta come clean soon. you'd made up your mind at this point and come up with a plan; you'd explain yourself to jaehyun and apologise after which you'll go your separate ways, then you'll tell your family the truth after tonight, or at least make up a more recent break up, and that's that.
when jaehyun looks to you for help, you play with your hands a little, not fully knowing what to say. "if the old ladies at the nursing home let him go, maybe...", is what you decide is the safest option to go with, and your sister seems satisfied enough, giggling drowsily. you know she's close to falling asleep, and you're about to inwardly celebrate a job well done when she pops her next, unexpected question. "will you both be together forever?"
oh. there's a hint of teasing behind her voice, but everything else about the question is innocent and genuine, blinking her eyes open so she can look at the both of you when you answer. though you're not touching him, you can feel jaehyun stiffen next to you, his voice sounding more than a little awkward when he lets out an involuntary "uhh".
"what do you mean, cutie?"
you don't know why he asks that, because it's a pretty straightforward question; will the two of you be together forever? you want to laugh at the irony because you know that if she had asked the same question last time jaehyun came home, you both would have exchanged knowing smiles, giggling shyly while you tried to answer. the answer would've been 'yes', and you know deep down that it still should be.
she clicks her tongue like it's the most obvious and easy question in the world, shrugging her shoulders when she speaks. "you know, that's what people do when they're in love,", she answers with no hesitation, and you want to roll your eyes because who kidnapped your little sister and replaced her with dhar mann? "just like mommy and daddy!"
"daddy and mommy are married, sweetie, it's a little different–"
"i know that", she cuts off your little improvised answer in a deadpan voice that almost makes you feel stupid, but all her questions have your heart thudding against your rib cage, and you're praying to god that jaehyun can't hear it too. "but still, they love each other, and that's why they're together forever. don't you love each other?"
you're pretty sure the world stopped spinning and your heart stopped beating simultaneously, most definitely not expecting these kinds of questions from your sister. how do you even prepare an answer for this kind of situation? you know for a fact that your cheeks are coated in a dark sheen of red, and out of the corner of your eye (because you refuse to look at him), you’re pretty sure you can see the distinct pink colour paint the tips of jaehyun's ears, like they always do when he's shy or embarrassed. you can't not give her an answer, because that looks weird and she's clearly waiting for one, but answering meant that you either tell her the truth, that no, you will not be together forever because your dumbass went and ruined everything for the both of you six months ago, or you can lie and say that she's right, which would be admitting a lot of things that you didn't want to admit–
"nothing's for sure, but you're right, if two people really do love each other...", jaehyun's deep voice brings all your spiralling thoughts to a halt, and you look at him for the first time in a bit, only to find that he's already looking at you, gaze raw and piercing. you hold your breath when he speaks, because you don't trust yourself at the moment. "...they'll end up together forever."
you hear your sister make some kind of a reply, but the heartbeat in your ears is so loud that you don't quite catch it, the eye contact you're holding with jaehyun so intense that it feels wrong to look away. what could he have possibly meant by that? or was it just some half-assed answer to get your sister to go to sleep? you realise that staring at him while trying to use your sixth sense to nonverbally convey these questions to him isn't going to work, but you can feel the lump forming in your throat, needing to get out of this situation quickly.
it takes everything in you to break the eye contact in favour of pressing a quick peck to your sister's temple, and she looks about ten seconds away from just crashing. "night y/n, night jae...", and with that she's out like a light, and you two wait wordlessly until her breathing evens out before silently exiting the room.
once her bedroom door is shut, you make a beeline for the front door, way too scared and vulnerable right now to look at jaehyun. he doesn't say anything, so neither do you, making sure the door is actually locked before taking your phone out of your pocket. the time on your phone screen reads '11:43', and you know it's too late to try and catch the metro or a bus, but you're too stubborn and embarrassed to ask jaehyun to drop you.
the air is cold outside, much colder than it was inside your warm house. at the current moment, there is no breeze either, the trees are still and there are only a few lights on around the street, and it just makes everything seem so still and loud. you look out at the road, eyes zeroing in on this one lamp post where you shared one of your first few kisses with the man standing beside you. it's crazy how time can change things, you think, because never would you have believed in the moment that jaehyun called you "the most beautiful girl in the world" before leaning in to sweetly connect your lips that he could ever be something so close to a stranger within months.
ultimately opting to look at him, you're once again unable to read the expression on his face as you try your best to speak your mind to him. "um, i'm gonna book a cab, so you're officially free to go. thanks again for tonight, you really didn't have to come with me, so i owe you one. or i don't have to owe you one, because we're not going to see each other again- anything's good with me, just uh...thanks."
he waits patiently for you to finish, and aside from the slightest hint of amusement in his eyes, you're at a loss over what he's really thinking, but his face is so stupidly handsome that you're feeling angry and a little awkward, choosing to look around, and at the floor, playing with your fingers as you spoke.
"you're so dramatic y/n, i can drop you home, it's no big deal", he's already walking towards the road and biting his lip, and you can't tell whether it's out of habit or if he's trying to hide a smile, yet something tells you that it might be the latter.
"so you just let me say all that even though you were gonna offer to drop me? dude..."
the initial ten minutes of the drive are uncommunicative, both of you choosing to look at the dark road instead of acknowledging the awkward silence that was swallowing the car up whole. you don’t talk about your argument in the kitchen, you don’t make small talk about dinner, you don’t talk. you'd normally play some music in the background and you know that your phone is definitely still connected to his car's bluetooth, but somehow it just doesn't feel right– punishing yourself by sitting in this impenetrable silence should do you better.
the roads are more or less empty, save for the lone car or bike that speeds past you. jaehyun knows the way to your house from your parent's because of the amount of times you've driven back and forth, so you don't feel the need to tell him to turn right or to keep going down a certain road, making for even more silence.
part of you is still a little thankful that it isn't the most short drive, even though you aren't even speaking to each other. all it takes is picturing your empty house, devoid of the homely domestic feeling it used to carry when jaehyun was a frequent visitor. what would you even do when you got home? wallow in self-pity over your life choices? play 'sweet' by cigarettes after sex because it reminds you of him, then put on his hoodie that doesn't even smell like him anymore, just so you can curl up in bed and have a good cry while you reminisce? you're starting to think that maybe attempting to talk to him isn't the worst idea, at least it'll give you something to cry about later.
you're going crazy wracking your brain, trying to think of something to say that wouldn't make the atmosphere even more uneasy, but all you got was "hey, thanks again for coming" and "hey, sorry for breaking up with you, what's good though?". you can't even help the wince creeping on your face, finally choosing to go with the former before you have a heart attack and die in jaehyun's front seat.
"thanks again for agreeing to come", you start, absolutely hating the break in your voice from not talking for some time. "you really didn't have to do that. and for dropping me."
he offers you a quick nod in your general direction and fixes his eyes on the road ahead like he was zipping through a crowded highway, though you're sure there isn't a car in sight. "like i said, it's cool", is all you get in return, and you have to remind yourself that he has every right to be short with you.
but still, you try again. "and you don't have to worry about my parents", chewing on your bottom lip, you actually look at him this time, hoping it'll prompt him to do the same, but it doesn't. "i'm gonna tell them the truth."
he releases a short breath from his nose like he finds your statement funny, but continues to not really say anything, just nodding to indicate that he heard you. you subconsciously clench and unclench your jaw at that, because god, he's so fucking annoying, but you swear you don't mean to release the slightly irritated sigh that you do. if you hadn't seen his knuckles turning white from how hard he's gripping the steering wheel, you might not have known that your little sigh pissed him off, because you can't tell it from his face, save from the barely-there eyebrow twitch.
you don't know what it is about car rides with only one other person that make you feel so vulnerable, but you think paired with this kind of silence, you could potentially confess to murder in this setting. it's infuriating, how unresponsive he is, and part of you thinks you're jealous of the control he's exerting, because you're dead sure that if you were in his position, you'd have a fair amount to say. it must be satisfying for him in a way, watching you squirm like this out of guilt and discomfort, but you know in your heart that jaehyun simply isn't like that.
"look, jaehyun", your mouth is working faster than your brain, the silence proving to be too much for you to handle. "i know i fucked things up a bit. with how i ended it and everything..."
perhaps you should've taken a little more time to properly articulate your thoughts, because even jaehyun can't control the astounded scoff that slips out of his mouth. you yourself can't believe that you chose to deliver your words like that and it makes you sound so self-righteous, but they're out, and now you're bracing yourself to finally hear what jaehyun really has to say.
"fucked things up a bit? are you serious?", you can hear it in his voice that he's holding back, but he chooses to laugh in disbelief instead, which you think is actually worse than him straight up screaming at you. "y/n, you didn't even bother telling me in person. you dumped me over the fucking phone, saying it wasn't working."
you now kind of wish that you had just kept quiet and sat in his awkward car, and exchanged awkward niceties when you reach home, never to see him again. but this is your final chance at some form of redemption, and now that jaehyun was actually speaking his mind instead of giving you tight nods, you tried to explain yourself.
"jaehyun, i know, i just–"
"i called you a bunch of times. i tried to come see you and everything, but you went and changed your lock and all your friends were saying you didn't want to see me?"
there goes trying to explain yourself. so you sat and listened instead, and it was the least you could do. jaehyun's voice became more and more strained as he talked, the emotions he was feeling now a lot more evident. he was angry, but more importantly, he was confused, and sad.
"i just- i didn't know what went wrong, you know? we were completely fine as far as i knew", he continues on in a laboured way and he's not looking for you speak right now, so you don't. "fuck i- i thought we were in love."
the little laugh he lets out in between his words more or less breaks your heart, the whole scenario sounding all too familiar. those exact words were the last thing you'd heard from jaehyun before you fully and cruelly broke things off, letting him know the decision was final before cutting the call. you remember that day so clearly. you had meant to go see him and explain all this in person, that’s the whole reason you were in the car, but for some reason, you just couldn’t do it. you remember how much your hands were shaking as you waited for him to pick up the call, sitting in the car by yourself in the middle of your driveway. how long you sat and cried after you ended the call, tears falling until there weren't any left. how it began raining the very second you stepped out of your car to go back inside.
the weather was a funny thing, choosing to mirror your mood only when it saw fit. it was warm and sunny on the day you broke up with him, gentle breeze and wispy clouds all around. it was warm and sunny this morning, the weather ever so pleasant as you plucked up the courage to walk to his door. it was still unusually warm and sunny for the couple months following your break up, feeling sour as ever that the weather was so lovely and all you could do was sit in your room and feel sorry.
you took note of all these occasions because it always used to piss you off. though you shiver now in the car, you think it's kind of satisfying in a way, because the only two times your mood and the weather lined up was right after the break up, and the second you stepped outside your house with jaehyun; it feels like a premonition, or a revelation of sorts. the grey of the stormy sky matched the absolute devastation you felt after breaking up with him, rain pouring from the heavy clouds like they were crying for you. now, the cold, still air feels like baited breath, awaiting your next move.
"and nothing, i hear nothing from you for six fucking months until you're suddenly on my doorstep, asking me to pretend to be your boyfriend for a night. that's fucking insane!", he sounds a little wild now, very exasperated, but you figure it's probably better to just let him get it all out of his system, and you'd do good to listen to him as well. everything he's saying makes complete sense, all the emotions he dealt with akin to what you would've gone through had it been you in his place. "and you know what's more insane? i agreed. after all that, i agreed."
that’s the part you don’t understand. your heart is racing listening to him and you have so many thoughts swimming around in your head, it's difficult to filter them. you feel similar to how you felt back in the kitchen, although this time you can't take a minute by yourself to get over it. you absolutely refuse to cry in this moment, not wanting to seem like you're trying to victimise yourself when you are aware you're the problem. but you can feel your heart breaking all over again.
"why did you agree?", you physically can't raise your voice to louder than a whisper, the tension too thick to try and overpower it.
"why did you dump me?", he counters like a child, and while you were expecting the question, it still makes you freeze up a little. he huffs in annoyance when you don't say anything, inclining his head while he waits expectantly for you to answer. "you wanted to talk? let's talk, y/n. you don't get to just waltz back into my life like it's nothing. it's not fair,"  it's so cold, the way he says your name, but you try your best not to let it further shake you, mustering up the courage to finally speak. "it's so stupid, jaehyun."
he looks like he's about two seconds away from just combusting, the only sound piercing the cold air being the gentle hum of the engine. "don't you think i deserve to know?", he urges, voice edged with hurt and frustration. "i spent the whole day with you and your family, pretending like everything was happy and normal when it's not."
"i know, jaehyun-"
"then, tell me."
you shift uncomfortably in your seat, teeth toying with your bottom lip as you avoid looking at him. "i don't know," you murmur, your voice barely audible to yourself over the pounding of your heart.
"you don't know?", he repeats incredulously, his tone tinged with disbelief. "after everything, you don't know? don't lie to me, y/n."
your throat tightens as guilt washes over you, but you try to stand your ground. "i just... i couldn't do it anymore," you confess, voice trembling with emotion.
"couldn't do what?", he presses, his frustration mounting with each passing moment. you know he doesn't believe you, dead set on getting the answers he deserves. he's driving slowly now, allowing him to turn his head in your direction more often.
"this!", you exclaim but immediately recoil when you see the look of hurt flash in his eyes. "no! not this, i mean- me! it's my fault, you did nothing wrong." you're saying all the wrong things, but you're too overcome with emotion to attempt to form a coherent sentence. still, you know it's time that the truth came out, so you continue to explain with a heavy heart.
"i didn't mean to hurt you," you choke out, and your voice is so thick you have to swallow before you carry on. he looks indignant and rightfully so, but you go on before he can interrupt you again. "but i was so scared, jaehyun."
his expression softens at your state, replaced with a mixture of sadness and resignation. "scared of what?", he asks quietly, his words hanging heavy in the air. you feel the need to pause for a moment, hands balled into tight fists as you try to regulate your breathing. you really didn't take into account how debilitating the night would be on yourself. sure, you knew it was going to be tough seeing jaehyun again, especially if he agreed to pretend to be together, but you weren't really expecting to hash it out like this, the weight of your decision pressing down on your like a leaden blanket.
the car moves so slow it may as well be still but  when you turn to him, you can feel the burn of jaehyun's gaze, his eyes searching for some semblance of understanding. "i loved you", he whispers, voice cracking with the intensity of his words. "i would've done anything for you."
you're still, you're so so still. tears threaten to spill from your eyes as you struggle to find the right words to say, but he's completely thrown you off. the car has slowed to a stop, engine idling before he eventually turns it off in favour of turning to you.
"that's exactly why," you reply weakly, your voice a fraction of the volume it normally is. he surveys you intently, his expression a mix of confusion and hurt, eyes reflecting the very same sadness you feel.
"what do you mean?"
"i was scared of hurting you," your confession does nothing to ease his confusion, but you can see he looks more shocked than anything now. "scared of hurting me?," he echoes, his uncertainty and disbelief palpable. "this is so ironic, it's almost funny..."
you think hearing any more of what he has to say is actually going to kill you internally, so you know you have to rush to explain before he starts giving you a piece of his mind again. "i know, it's so fucking stupid, jaehyun", your voice is trembling from the sheer guilt you feel, bottom lip quivering so much you have to bite it to get it to stop. "everything was going so perfectly, you were so perfect, and it scared me so much."
he falls silent, much to your relief, his expression even softening minutely as he processes your words and this gives you the encouragement to continue. "remember that night on the beach? on the trip last year?", you speak tentatively, wanting him to understand your thought process and the tangled mess of emotions swirling inside you at the time, though it's not much of a defense. the memory floods into your mind so vividly, and you can see it all; the salt in the air, the gentle breeze, the feeling of the sand, your intertwined hands swinging. it was so serene and you'd give anything to be there in that moment again, though it's nothing but a distant dream now.
he nods slowly without speaking, and you release a wet sort of laugh, feeling like you'd choke on the lump in your throat. "we talked about everything that night, our families, our childhoods, our futures...and then you brought up what would happen after we graduated college."
you know he remembers because his eyes light up with recognition and he looks like he's replaying that exact moment in his head, and you hope he remembers it with the same soft, gushy feeling you do. "you said you wanted to move in together, and don't get me wrong, i was thrilled, but it made me realise how...serious everything was, you know?", your voice catches in your throat and you're talking to yourself as much as you're talking to him and he seems to understand that, because he makes no attempt to stop you.
it's silent again for a bit as you two reminisce, but you break it again. "i just knew i was going to fuck up, jaehyun. maybe not right away, but eventually, and the thought terrified me," you sniffle a little, not being able to bring yourself to look up from your hands to meet his gaze. "that feeling never really went away, and it was eating me up from the inside. it got so bad that i had convinced myself that you were going to leave me, so i had to do it first, before i fucked up."
your sorrowful confession hangs in the air like an echo and you finally give in to the urge to look at him, and you're shocked– he looks at you so carefully, his expression soft, much, much softer than before. you couldn't stop the tears from finally falling if you tried , the soft glow of the dashboard illuminating the contours of your now wet face. your shared eye contact makes you feel nervous, but not in the way you were expecting– it's too gentle, too raw and it makes you feel a certain way.
"i know it's not an excuse," you're blubbering so much that your cheeks feel hot, you're practically falling apart in the passenger seat of jaehyun's car while he watches and lets you pour all your miseries out onto him. "you don't know how much i regretted it...but i thought i did the right thing. for the both of us. even though i just ended up doing what i was trying to avoid by hurting you."
it's too much now, jaehyun's too silent, and too not-angry for your liking; why is he looking at you in a way that makes you feel like he doesn't think you're the worst person in the world? you can't hold back the sob that's building in your chest, doubling over in favour of pressing your hands against your face and bawling into them. you're not too loud a cryer, but the tremors of emotion you feel are making your shoulders shake, so you're crying silently into your hands while trembling. however guarded he tries to be, the gentleness of his voice overpowers it as he speaks. "i know, shh...," he murmurs and you can't believe your ears, that the man you thought hated you is actually attempting to comfort you after everything. "breathe, y/n."
like it's second nature to him, his hand travels to your back as the sobs wrack through your body, immediately drawing soothing circles on to your covered skin with his thumb. you don't know how but this almost makes you feel worse, the fact that he's still so caring towards you. you pluck up the strength to lift your face from your moist hands, and you're sure it's not a pretty sight that greets him. your nose feels unbelievably stuffy, and your face is on fire when you meet his sympathetic eyes, the warmth from his gaze and hand spreading throughout you, even though he's now removed it. "i'm sorry," you manage through sniffles, but you think you almost flatline when he reaches his hand towards your face, ever so gently caressing it. his thumb juts out and sweeps across the skin under your eye, wiping away at the wetness. "i know."
"shh, it's okay. you're okay", he coos gently and slowly takes his hand back in favour of imitating slow breaths for you, helping you relax a little as you copy him. "why would you think i'd leave you?", he asks carefully once you've calmed down a bit and wiped your tear-streaked face, simply surveying you now. all you can offer him is a defeated shrug, attempting to collect your thoughts. "remember i told you about my ex? the very first one?"
he nods.
"i moved on obviously, like ages ago, but since then i think i've always had this idea that getting dumped is inevitable", you try to explain, voice small as he listens patiently. "it was either leave them or get left, and i was so scared that it would happen with you, that i'd fuck up so bad that you would leave. i couldn't do it."
he frowns and calls out your name in a way that sounds like he's about to lecture you, but you know he can't tell you anything that you haven't already told yourself. "i know, jae, it was so stupid, i know. i don't regret anything more", you sigh, giving him a tight, small smile when you lock eyes. "i'm sorry."
you notice his eyes soften at the nickname, releasing a quiet huff before he runs a hand through his hair. his body language doesn't carry the same anger it did before when he was ranting, now looking subdued and reflective. "i understand why you did what you did. it was stupid, but i understand", he murmurs, his voice impossibly soft when meeting your gaze, the eye contact so intense that you have to physically remind yourself not to cry again by digging your fingernails into your palms. "i would've never left you."
you nod slowly at his admission, his words hanging in the air. "i should've just talked to you...", you concluded in a sullen way and he doesn't reply in full, just mumbling a soft "yeah" under his breath. you don't mind the silence that fills the car this time, the underlying tension more or less dissipated, but you do notice the time, realising that jaehyun still needs to go back home after dropping you.
"should we, uh...", you gesture towards the road and he jumps up in his seat, as though he forgot that he was driving you somewhere in the first place, muttering "sorry" before twisting the key to start the car. this makes you let out an involuntary giggle and jaehyun shoots you a quick glare which immediately shuts you up, a certain warmth blooming in your chest when you see a small smile creep on to his face out of the corner of your eye.
it's quiet for a bit, jaehyun focusing on the road while you gaze out the window. much to your dismay, both the road and the various buildings and shops start to look a lot more familiar, indicating that you are nearing your home. you shouldn't be dismayed really, because this wasn't the most congenial of car rides, but it means that your time with jaehyun is coming to an end. you don't know what the conversation that took place means for you and him however, because unless you're alarmingly stupid, you feel that he may not hate you as much as he once did. does this mean you might even be able to see him again sometime? in a setting where you're not sweating and shaking at just the thought of seeing him?
you think it might be a bit audacious of you to ask that, so you don't. instead, you turn to him with a light grin, playing with the necklace clasped around your neck. "hey, at least you got some new headphones out of all of this", you joke lightheartedly, eyeing the package sitting on the backseat. he lets out a heartwarming chuckle at your comment, glancing at the bag through his rear view mirror. "i can't believe your parents bought that for me. you think they'll make me return it when they find out we aren't together?", he remarks, and you do your best to ignore the little pang you feel at the reminder of your situation. his comment does make you snort though, and you nod along with him. "nah, you need it more than anyone. your airpods have seen better days."
he laughs again, and you wouldn't believe that you two were arguing back and forth like madmen some twenty minutes back. this feels familiar and comfortable, and you cross your fingers in case you jinx it. "do you remember that time when we planned a picnic..." jaehyun begins, a sense of nostalgia shining through his cheeks. "and you forgot to bring the speakers? and we tried blasting music through my one airpod?"
you can't stop the peals of laughter that escape from your mouth as you nod, covering your mouth when your snort makes him laugh as well. "remind me why we didn't just play the music straight from your phone?", you question, replaying the memory in your mind like it was recent. he pauses to think for a moment, rubbing the back of his neck while he hums. "yeah, what the fuck? why didn't we just do that?"
you're laughing in unison as you take this trip down memory lane together, the next few minutes of the car ride consisting of exclamations of "oh! remember when..." and "that time when...", both of you adding on to the memories with your own perspectives and insights. the fact that the conclusion of your little dispute remains ambiguous doesn't bother you too much at the moment, happy to just enjoy the warm atmosphere while you can.
jaehyun's animatedly recounting a story about your sister downloading a game on his phone when you face him, and the last thing you remember paying attention to was that she had somehow managed to spend a large amount of his actual money on it. your eyes are focused on him now, just studying him, and he seems to realise that you aren't listening to his story when he glances at you.
"what?", he questions, the corner of his eyes crinkling when he narrows them at you in an playful manner, taking one hand off the steering wheel to drum absentmindedly on his thigh. "nothing, i just...", you trail off, scanning his features. "you changed your hair. it's...nice. i wanted to tell you that earlier."
he clearly wasn't expecting the compliment, mouth opening and then closing as he tries to think of an admissible reply. "you like it?", he then asks, a shy smile tugging at his lips when he consciously cards his fingers through the longer bit at the back. at your reaffirming nod and heavy gaze, the expected pink sheen dusts his cheeks and though you can't see them, you know the tips of his ears are pink too. he mumbles something of a timid "thank you", both of you smiling like idiots while he trains his eyes on the road.
not too soon after, his car is pulling into your dark driveway. you can't help the sinking feeling in your chest, lips curved slightly downwards. none of the lights are on, save for the streetlight, illuminating the street in a ghostly, dim way. your house looks just like it had for the past many months, gloomy and lonely, and you're absolutely dreading the idea of moping around once again. if this day spent with jaehyun has showed you anything, it's that you're a 100% sure you've not moved on, and that you won't for a long, long time. simply put, you're still in love with him, and you'll have to carry the cross of your mistake for some time to come.
he switches the ignition off but neither of you move. you're sat in your dull driveway on an otherwise empty street, all the other lights of your neighbouring houses off. neither of you say anything, mostly because you're not sure what one is supposed to say in this situation, so everything is still.
"so–"
"well–"
you let out a nervous chuckle while he smiles a bit, both of you mumbling apologies for interrupting each other. "you go first", jaehyun compels you, but now you don't know what to say because you were just going to make it up as you speak. your mouth has a way of working faster than your brain sometimes, but neither seem to be too functional at the present moment. "no, you go", is all you got, and jaehyun has the nerve to roll his eyes, twisting in his seat a little so he's facing you.
"i was just going to say that we uh, reached your place", he claims in a deadpanned manner, but your car door is still locked and your seatbelt is still locked in. you think you must have lost your mind, hoping that he'd tell you to stay with him forever and never leave (which you would have agreed to in a heartbeat). "i guess we have...", you nod, looking out the window and observing your home. maybe it was the dread of going back to your old routine that gave you the sudden boost of confidence, but you realise he never answered your question from before.
"jaehyun...", you begin but falter when you think you might be overstepping, ultimately deciding to just ask anyway when he looks at you expectantly. "why did you agree to come today? we both know you didn't have to."
he looks like he was dreading the very question you asked for some time, shutting his eyes when he leans his head back against the headrest and sighs. "i don't know", is the answer he gives you, voice muffled through the palms of his hands that are rubbing his face tiredly. biting your lip, you have to hold back a similar sigh because you should've known he's not going to just tell you like that. you have no right to press, but yet you do, one more time. "jaehyun, please?"
maybe it's because you sound so meek, but he drops his hands in favour of looking at you, really looking at you, like he's searching your eyes. "why do you think?", he turns it back on you, but you know this is just his way of avoiding the question. "if i knew, i wouldn't be asking. i know you don't have to tell me, you don't owe me a single thing, i just–", you speak desperately with all of the confidence you can muster, worried that your bottom lip would start trembling again. "please, i need to know."
you're looking each other dead in the eye, and while your voice isn't strong, it's honest and raw, and jaehyun can sense that. you can see that there's a million thoughts running in his mind just by the pained look in his eye and your own heartbeat has picked up, the sound deafening in your ears.
"if you haven't figured it out by now, i don't know what to tell you."
thud. thud. thud. you wonder if he can hear your heartbeat over the sound of his, but the blood pumping through your veins is making your ears ring, because what did he mean by that? you hope it means what you want it to mean, but you can't just assume you know everything because you're delusional at this point. "jaehyun, what are you sayi–"
"i agreed because i'm still in love with you."
there it is. the silence after his confession is positively deafening, your mouth agape as your try to register what you just heard. your eyes flicker between his, searching for any signs that he's just messing you and that it's some cruel joke, though it would be completely in his right to fuck with you if he wanted. he's never looked more vulnerable, eyes trained on you in an almost frantic way, like he himself can't believe what he just said. the way he just blurted it out makes you think that he didn't fully mean to admit that, but it's out, nothing he could do to take it back.
"what?", your own voice sounds like an echo and you wish you had something else to say because you heard him loud and clear, but there's a burning ache in your chest that claws all the way up to your throat. the shock is evident in your voice, not knowing what to do with yourself as you visibly process his words. "tell me you're joking", you plead in a pained way, words barely above a whisper. he doesn't say anything, looking lost in his own thoughts as his eyes scan your face. "you don't hate me?"
"hate you?", he scoffs disconsolately, shaking his head slowly. "i couldn't hate you if i tried. and believe me, i tried."
you can hardly believe your ears. you know your heart shouldn't be pounding the way it is, it feels wrong almost for you to be feeling as relieved as you are. "after everything?", you insist dumbfoundedly, but the longing in your voice is palpable, even if you're trying to give him a way out. "i was so horrible to you, jaehyun." you hate the way your voice cracks, but jaehyun just sighs and offers you a sad smile.
"there's nothing you could do to make me hate you."
it's heartbreaking, how defeated he sounds, but he's also looking at you like you could do no wrong in his eyes. "i never moved on", you whisper, hesitance clear as you tell him the truth. "i couldn't delete any of our pictures, i still have all your clothes, sometimes i accidentally set the table for two when it's just me..."
he's blinking quickly, and if you didn't know any better, you'd say he was trying to hold back tears. your break-up did nothing but cause immense amounts of pain for the both of you, and you'd give anything in the world to make up the time lost. his wide-eyed and nearly motionless expression urges you to continue, ready to pour out your heart to the man you loved.
"i still have your number memorised", your face mirrors his, voice growing stronger by the minute. "all the gifts and letters you've ever given me, they're all still there in that shoebox in my cupboard."
"i thought about you everyday", his whisper is raspy, speaking right after you do. "every party i went to, i looked for you even though i knew you wouldn't be there. you know johnny tried setting me up with people?"
you try to suppress the little sting, but you feel it deep inside you. "he did?", you have to clear your throat, and you almost don't want to ask but you do anyway. he releases a sad little chuckle and nods, toying with his fingers. "yeah. i knew i was doomed when the whole date, i wished she was you."
the smile finds its way on to your face against your will, feeling that familiar lump make its way to your throat. "she could've made you happy, jae", you argue anyway because at the end of the day, you want the best for him, and you know you're far from the best.
"no one could make me feel the way you do, y/n", he replied honestly, and there's a sense of finality to his words, like he'd had this same argument with himself time and time again, only to come to this conclusion. “the thought of anyone else touching you made me sick”, he croaked, not missing the way his eyes ghost over your frame.
his words bring about a noticeable shift in the air, followed by silence. he watches you, and you watch him, breathing slow as your eyes dart across his face.”i don’t want anyone but you”, you confess slowly, and a few beats pass before you find it in you to speak again. "i love you, jaehyun."
silence.
you expected disapproval, maybe even a malicious scoff, but you certainly weren't expecting to feel a soft pair of lips against yours as he suddenly lurches forward.
you're stunned, so stunned that you don't even reciprocate the kiss, lips unmoving against his. it's only when he takes this as a sign of discomfort and breaks the kiss that you find yourself reacting, hands immediately making their way to caress his cheeks, leaning forward to chase his lips and close the distance between you. he lets out a sound of surprise against your lips but kisses you back right away, a hand wrapping around your neck from the back, tangling itself in your hair. the kiss is heated and so long overdue, tangible through the way his lips meld furiously together with yours, teeth clashing every now and then.
your hands make their way to his broad shoulders, one wrapping around them while the other comes to rest on his chest, gripping the material of his hoodie. you have the urge to be impossibly close to him, trying to lean forward to kiss him more fully but you're restricted by your seatbelt. it's almost as if he can read your mind, because the hand placed against your face now moves to press on the buckle to release you without breaking the kiss. "fucking seatbelt...", he mumbles disgruntedly against your lips, fiddling with the button until you hear it click, finally separating yourself from him to slip it over you. "there we go."
you don't stay separated for long because jaehyun uses the hand behind your head to pull you towards him again, capturing your lips in a way that makes all the air leave your lungs. "come here", he grunts, using his long arms to pull you clumsily over the gearshift and straight on to his lap. you settle yourself in to the somewhat awkward position in the enclosed space, but that's the last thing on your mind when all your thoughts consist of jaehyun, jaehyun, jaehyun. his lips are back on yours in a instance, tongue sweeping across your bottom lip messily and you gladly allow it to explore your mouth.
the air is impossibly thick, heavily contrasting to the cold weather outside the car, even his lips and hands feel warm against your hot body. you feel his hands grip your waist easily in this position, lips leaving your own to drag across the expanse of your jaw. you whine quietly at the feeling of his mouth sucking a particular spot on your neck, tilting your head back as you wrap your arms around his neck. "missed this", he muses, tongue peeking out to kitten lick at your neck, breath hot against your sensitive skin. "missed you."
the feeling in your chest when his hands find their way under your shirt and on to your bare skin is inexplicable, unable to stop the soft moan from tumbling from your lips when his big hands glide over your stomach, back and finally your breasts. everything about the way he's touching you and kissing you is greedy and urgent, like he's afraid you'll disappear from his arms if he loosens his grip even by a little bit. you'd be a fool to not match this energy, pressing into him while you squeeze your hands over his. "need you so bad, jae."
you're subconsciously grinding down against him needily, hips stuttering against his lap like you've never been touched before. "fuck", your eyes widen at the groan that leaves his throat, sounding absolutely guttural as he grips the skin of your hip harshly.
he's barely done anything and you're coming undone right in front of his watchful eyes, your panties dampening at the look on his face. "jae..", you whine when his fingers dip past the waistband of your pants, gently cupping your clothed core as you rut against it. "shit, baby", he marvels at the stickiness of your panties, feeling your wetness on his fingers just through the material. "you really missed me, huh?"
you don't even have the time to respond to his cocky remark before his fingers are slipping beneath the band of your panties to circle your clit, spreading the wetness around your folds. a breathy sigh escapes your lips, throwing your head back as he experimentally prods at your entrance and eventually slips a finger inside. "still so tight for me", he all but groans, pumping his finger in and out of you languidly, drinking in the sounds of your pleasure. he feels so blissfully familiar, and though you haven't been touched by him, or anyone for that matter for months, the stretch of his second finger feels the same kind of intimate as it did before, if not more.
you lean forward and press your lips against his once again, kissing him like you might never get the chance to again, all while you're grinding back down on his hand that's fingering you steadily with a thumb circling your clit at the same time. his free hand moves to bunch your top up above your breasts, peppering kisses over the tops of them. he wastes no time in pulling your breasts free from from their cups, attaching his lips to one nipple and swirling his tongue around it in a way that makes you cry out. "my pretty girl", he mumbles almost to himself while cupping your other breast, making a show out of it as his tongue flicks over your hardened bud over and over until your arching your back and pressing it further into his face. “thought about this all the time.”
keeping in mind that you're still technically in a public place, you bite your lip to contain the sounds of your pleasure, though jaehyun doesn't make it easy when he notices this and increases the pace of his fingers. the hand fondling your breast leaves it unattended for a moment to release your bottom lip from your teeth, smoothing his thumb over the swollen skin. "i've waited months to hear these sounds. let me hear you, baby", he all but purrs and that's all it takes for a moan to tumble out of your mouth, pressing your forehead against the side of his face while you screw your eyes shut out of pleasure.
with his attack on your sensitive buds and his fingers pistoning inside of you, you know you aren't going to last long. "already?", jaehyun chides with a small smirk, and it's embarrassing how well he knows your body, grazing his teeth against your nipple in a way that feels painful and heavenly at the same time. you can feel his rock hard bulge against you, and with the untimely grinding of your hips against him, you're sure this is torturous for him. "don't wanna come like this", you whine against his cheek, your entire body feeling sticky from the heat inside the closed vehicle. your puckered lips leave wet kisses all over the expanse of his cheek, and the boyish giggle that leaves his mouth makes your heart flutter. "wanna feel you, jae."
his head is thrown back against the headrest and his eyes are shut tightly, jaw clenched as he slowly slips his fingers out of you. though you whine at the loss of contact and you're almost grinding against the air, you want nothing more than to make him feel good as well. "want you to fill me up", you coo at him, softly linking your hands behind his neck as you test the waters with your words. it's clear they have an effect on him, both hands placed on your hips as he helps you lazily grind against his erection. "don't– have a condom", he grits out, hips bucking up to meet yours. "don't need one", you murmured immediately, knowing he wants this as bad as you do.
his eyes flicker open at that, one hand leaving your hip to brush some stray hairs away from your face, gently tucking some behind your ear. you could melt at the way he's looking at you, so tender and loving, a warmth spreading all over you until you feel like you have to look away. he doesn't let you however, hand quickly coming you to cup your cheek before leaning in place a small peck against your lips. "are you sure?", he sounds breathless, but still firm as his eyes glance between yours like he's reading them.
if he can read them, he'll know that you can't nod fast enough, dragging your hips across his needily to show him. "i'm sure. i want you, jae.", you're so needy that you don't even bother to take your pants or panties off fully, fingers fumbling with the waistband as you shimmy them down a little, leaving your underwear on. you swear your mouth waters when he unbuttons his pants and lets his cock spring out against his stomach, lustful eyes taking in the way he keeps his shirt up with his teeth. if this weren't such an awkward position, you'd have taken him in your mouth in an instant, knowing exactly what to do to hear the man in front of you whimper.
nudging your panties to the side, he focuses on collecting your wetness all over the tip of his dick, hissing at the contact. "please", you whine, not wanting to waste another moment, finally sighing in relief when he begins to press his cock inside you. he swears under his breath at the feeling, and you're feeling so stretched out just from him slipping it in even though you're still so wet that you just go lax in his arms until he bottoms out. "that's it", he grunts like he's holding back. "taking me so well, angel."
you preen at his praise, finally beginning to move your hips a little at his coaxing. sighing against the shell of his ear, he picks up the pace for you, not warning you before thrusting upwards to meet your movements with a groan. you can feel your mind going blank at the sensation, your moans sounding more like cries whenever he snaps his hips into yours, the obscene sounds filling the car. you're just so full, his hands gliding up and down your sides as he fucks deep inside you, making up for all the lost time. "you feel so good, baby", he barely gets his words out, but it gives you the encouragement to bounce up and down on his thick cock a little faster than before, his eyes widening at the feeling. "just like that."
he's kissing and sucking all over your neck again, lips ghosting over whatever skin he can reach and it's all so much, feeling a single tear stream down your face. he almost slows down for a second when he feels the tear drop on to his own face, eyebrows raised in surprise because he thinks he's hurting you, but he's even more shocked when you let out the high-pitched whine. "what's wrong, angel?", he mumbles into your neck, peering up at you carefully. you shake your head profusely, continuing to grind down on his cock. "i just- just love you so much, jae", you blabber incoherently, so wet that you're practically gushing around his dick.
"aw, baby", he shushes you sweetly, pressing his forehead against yours as his thrusts become more and more erratic. "i'm here. not going anywhere." the coil in your stomach is tightening and you can feel every inch of him inside you, more tears threatening to spill from your eyes before he's kissing them away. "i'm here."
he's hitting all the right spots inside you in this position, and he's basically doing all the work because you're like putty in his strong arms, all you can do is moan and cry out against him weakly. "i'm close", you warn him, but you know he already knows that, and you know he is too, slipping your hand down to where his rests on your hip and interlacing your fingers. "me too, pretty", he sputters through his teeth, giving your hand a tight squeeze as you start to come undone. “want you to cum. can you do that for me?”
"oh my god", you're crying out as you cum around his cock, body and mind going numb and ears ringing as the coil finally snaps. "cum inside me, jae, please", his eyes go wide at the way you're begging him, and he doesn't look like he can hold back much longer. "fuck angel, you- you sure–"
"yes, please, need you to fill me up", you cut him off, too sensitive from the way he's helping you ride out your high to move anymore. with a few more sloppy thrusts, his cock is twitching inside you before you lets out a guttural groan, his warm cum filling you up. you go limp against him, face nuzzled into the crook of his neck as the both of you try to regulate your heartbeats.
the sounds of your heavy breathing fills up the car along with jaehyun's soft murmurs of "so perfect" and "did so well for me". any doubts you had in your mind of this being a mistake in jaehyun's eyes are wiped away when he begins petting your head, gently smoothing your messy hair as he presses firm kisses to your head. his cock softens inside of you but he makes no move to pull out, wrapping his arms around your waist while you do the same around his neck, simply sitting in each other's presence silently.
you struggle but finally pick yourself up, gazing at his moonlit face from your place on his lap. “you okay? was that okay?”, he murmurs softly, his voice thick and eyes hazy as he traces little shapes on your back. “more than okay”, you reply tiredly, pressing your lips against his once again because you feel you’re in a dream-like state right now. you're sure he's the most beautiful man you're ever had the privilege of looking at, feeling incredibly vulnerable when you speak again even though he's looking at you with nothing but love in his eyes. "now what?", you question, suddenly feeling like you've jumped the gun when he opens his mouth to say something but stays silent. "never mind, don't answer that, we'll talk about it later", you shake your head, laughing a little breathlessly when he grins at you, pecking his forehead sweetly.
you look away from him and at your lifeless house, mouth working faster than your brain once again. "would you...want to come in?", you wince, feeling kind of stupid for asking but meaning it anyway. you're both comforted and thrilled when a large grin is plastered on to his face, feeling like maybe your home won't be as lifeless anymore.
"i think i'd love to come in."
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moonlight1110 · 9 months ago
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Crawling back to you
ex-boyfriend!Ghost x Reader ; (Late) Valentines Special ;)
Your ex-boyfriend who comes banging at your door in the middle of the night. He desperately wants you back, and when he invites himself in, is there really nothing else you can do?
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Tags: afab!reader, p in v, smut, nsfw, vaginal sex, rough sex (kinda idk), mating press, pathetic!Simon, far from canon simon, i write with badjhur's voice in my ear, not propfread, proofread anyway BC I hate typos
Notes: planned on writing something for valentines but uni fucked me sideways so im posting today <3
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"What the hell..." You jump as three hard knocks come from your door, almost as if the person on the other side was just a second away from breaking it down.
You didn't need to go through your mental library to know who it was, you knew exactly who was at your door at this ungodly hour because who else in their right mind would show up uninvited except him.
With a grunt, you roll off of bed and trudge to your front door. A heavy feeling pressing down on your chest as you got closer and closer to the door, you contemplated if opening it was even a good option, but knowing who was on the other side, choosing to ignore him was going to be a poor decision on your part.
With an tired sigh, you grabbed the door knob, squeezing it as doubts ran through your mind, but you are snapped out of it when he knocks, even harder than before.
"What are you doing?!" You ask, trying not to scream at him to avoid receiving another noise complaint from your overbearing neighbors when you opened the door slightly to peek out the small crack of it. Standing on the other side was someone you knew all too well.
"Let me in" his voice was low as he looked down at you, dark eyes staring at you from the opening of his balaclava. "Please..." He took a step forward, placing a hand on your door, but you stayed firm. "Simon, you can't just come here in the middle of the night and expect me to let you in" you argued, hardening the hand that was holding your door.
"I miss you, baby, come on..." He pushed the door slightly, you knew you wouldn't stand a chance even if you tried your hardest to shut the door. With how strong and large Simon was, trying to fight back against him was next to impossible.
"Simon, please..." You looked at him, brows furrowing. However, even at your attempts to stand by your decision, there was a part of you that wanted him to just push your door open... An unexplainable feeling, you thought.
"Take me back... I'll do anything" He sounded desperate, his voice sounded unlike the person you thought you knew, he sounded hurt, vulnerable, not like the usual stone cold and stoic Ghost you knew.
"You broke up with me remember... You can't just go back on that when you want to" your expression hardened in contrast to his which softened as he looked into your eyes. He regretted it, deeply.
"I did, I know that but I didn't know I would be making the biggest mistake of my life, love..." He steps closer, pushing your door open just a bit again. "Don't call me that... Just don't" you shake your head in disapproval but that small part of you just misses the way he called you that, how it rolled off his tongue like honey, you missed it.
"Just let me in, let's talk... I miss you" the last part comes out as a mumbled plea as he pushes your door open finally, stepping inside like he never left. Those three words just made you want to jump over the boundaries you so desperately tried to build up, but all you could do was step aside and let him in, there was no point in fighting him.
"What's there left to talk about, Simon?" You sighed, crossing your arms over your chest as Simon removed his shoes, it looked so familiar next to yours...
"I want you back, I can't fuckin' live without you..." His brows knit together as he looks down at you, reaching out but you step back with a disapproving look. "Then why did you end it in the first place if you were just gonna come back to me anyway..." Your hands fall to your sides with a defeated sigh leaving your lips.
"I told you, it was the distance, my work... I thought breaking up with you would be the best choice for the both f'us..." Ignoring your attempts at creating space between you, he steps closer, caging you between his arms as he leaned against the wall, effectively trapping you under him.
"I was wrong, baby... So fuckin' wrong..." he whispered, his eyes silently pleading for your to just listen. He leaned forward so close you could feel his hot breath even through the fabric of his balaclava.
"I didn't even want to leave you..." You started, your face scrunching as you remembered the events that happened the day he cut things off between the two of you. "You made up so many reasons, so many excuses... You put words in my mouth..." You looked away, feeling your chest tighten again at the recollection of your memories together. It hurt to bring up and remember but with seeing Simon standing in front of you again, it was impossible to push those thoughts away.
"I know, I know..." He took your chin inbetween his index and thumb, willing you to look back at him. His expression was one of guilt and desperation, that much was clear with the way he was looking at you.
"But I can't stand another day without you, been regretting that decision every fuckin' day, love..." He leans in, snaking a hand around your waist. You want to pull away, to push him off and tell him to fuck off from you forever but you don't, you just cant find it in you to push him away when all you wanted was to be with him.
"Those months away from you felt like an eternity, don't wanna feel that anymore..." He pulls you closer, holding you tightly against his chest with his nose now inhaling the scent of your hair from the crook of your neck.
"We can't... This is the type of shit that complicates things, Simon..." you place your hands on his chest as if you even wanna push him off you. "I don't care..." He groans and pulls his balaclava off, breathing against your neck. It makes you squirm the way his hands are travelling down now, you missed it more than you were willingly to openly admit to him anyway, but that's no issue for how your body is responding.
"Fuck if it means we'll get complicated, I need you back..." He kisses at your neck, still familiar with all the spots that just made you melt. "Can't be away from you for another fuckin' day, baby..." He groans, pinning you against the wall by your hips, grinding a knee to your clothed cunt.
"Just say the word and I'll leave..." He groans, giving your throat a good lick all the way to your collarbone as his hands found your ass, kneading like he owned it. "I'll leave and I'll never come back, I won't bother you... But y'need to tell me..." His lips drag along your shoulder as he pulls you closer on his thigh, "Tell me... Tell me y'never wanna see me again, push me away..." He mumbles against the side of your neck.
Your breath hitches in your throat with the way he was talking to you, you knew Simon was a man who was true to his word and once you'd tell him to leave, he would.
"C'mon..." he retracts from your neck and pulls back to look you in the eyes, his brows are furrowed and his eyes are blown out as his eyes flicker over your features like he's trying to memorize every single detail before you told him to leave.
"I..." you scramble to find the words, you wanna tell him to leave but you also want him to stay, you two didn't even end on that much of a bad note, it was a misunderstanding, a poor decision which was made in the heat of the moment...
"Don't leave..." You give in to your emotions, just seeing Simon again after your breakup hurt like hell, but god would you curse yourself if you allowed him to leave again... You couldn't take that, seeing him walk out again, leaving you for the second time.
"Fuck..." He groans as he connects your lips, his hands are pulling at you and pinning you against the wall. It's a passionate and desperate kiss from him, which you return with your own, full of want and the same desperation you craved would be quenched for such a long time. No one did it like him, no one ever loved you like Simon Riley ever did.
Your arms find his neck as your head tilts, allowing Simon to push his tongue past your lips. He doesn't let up, doesn't get up for air, he just fucking wants you, wants to take you right then and there with how much he misses you.
His hands cup your ass as he lifts you up against the all and you wrap your legs around his torso as he finally pulls away from the kiss. "I need you, baby... Fuckin' missed you too much..." he practically growled as he sucked on your neck, walking to your bedroom.
"Simon, calm down..." You mumbled as he set you down on the bed, you could feel how rapidly his heart was beating but that only made him chuckle. "Can't calm down when I have you in my arms again, love" He stared down at you as he leaned back up, removing his shirt quickly.
"Missed you so much..." He whispered against your ear when he dove back down, making space for himself between your legs as he hovered on top of you with his arms on either side of your head. "Missed the way you feel around me..." He hummed while his hands trailed down your waist, to your hips, then just above the hem of your flimsy sleeping shorts.
"Did y'think 'bout me too? hm?" he asked, pressing a kiss to your jaw as his hand travelled under your shorts, his middle finger now circling on your wet clit through your panties. You didn't notice how you ruined your underwear until you felt how slick and uncomfortable it was when Simon pressed harder against your clit.
"Yeah... I did..." you whispered breathily, back arching at the feeling of Simon's thick fingers pleasuring you. He smirks, taking the opportunity to kiss and suck at your neck. "Mmm... Yeah?" He chuckles against your throat, parting your slick covered panties to the side to finally tease at your wet pussy.
"Fuck baby... She missed me didn't she?" he laughs, looking down at the way his hand moved from under your shorts. "Fuckin' pussy missed me too, huh?" He chuckles, as he pushes his thick finger inside you, making you gasp and grip at his arm.
"Simon!" you shut your eyes, back arching as he pressed gentle kisses against your throat. "Relax baby... need to prepare you again, been too long since I've fucked this pretty little pussy..." He coos, adding another finger to stretch you out, curling them so deliciously inside you.
"Fuck... I-" you whimper, sucking in a breath as he finds that spot inside you that just makes you break, he still knows of course, knows every single spot and every single way to make you crumble and submit to him. "I'm gonna cum, Si..." You whisper breathlessly, hands shaking around Simon's arm weakly.
Simon doesn't say anything except give you a cruel chuckle when he waits for the perfect time, just when you're about to cum to take his fingers out and it makes you shoot him a nasty glare. "Why did you do that?!" You whined, but your voice weakens at the sight of the hard bulge under his pants.
"Don't want you cummin' on anything but my cock tonight, love..." he chuckles dangerously, sitting on his knees to unbuckle his pants. He looks down at you with a hunger in his eyes, licking his lips as he finally rolls the zipper down. "C'mon, don't just stare" He smirks, snapping you out of your trance. "Right..." you blink, moving closer to him.
"Good..." he praises as he watches you tug his pants and boxers down together and tossing it down the side of the bed. "Fuck..." He hisses when he's finally free, his dick rock hard and heavy, twitching as beads of precum roll down from the tip. Your breathing quickens when you see it, it's bigger than you remember, thick and running with veins you wish you could memorize.
"On your back..." Simon commands, his voice low as he wraps a hand around his shaft to stroke his dick slowly. "But..." you look into his eyes but he shakes his head with a mean smirk when he looks at you. "As much as I wanna fuck that pretty mouth of yours, that's gonna have to wait another time" He chuckles, pushing you down on your back by your shoulder.
"I need t'fuck you, baby... Need t'feel you 'round my dick again..." he growls, watching the way your face is flushed and your legs are spread out on either side of his torso. He strokes his dick in his hands as he hums, using his free hand to slide your shorts and panties over your legs, throwing it with his pants.
"Fuckin' hell..." he groans when his eyes finally see your bare pussy, your clit twitching and your entrance clenching around nothing. It makes him fist his cock harder as he runs his free hand down your stomach, his thumb finding your clit and rolling it down in little circles.
"Stop teasing..." you say through gritted teeth as one of your hands grip the sheets under you and the other pressed against Simon's chest. "M'not teasing" He chuckles, tapping his dick on your clit a few times. "Just shut up and fuck me already, Simon..." You whine, slapping his chest pathetically.
"Gettin' feisty now, eh?" he laughs lowly as a low satisfied rumble comes from deep in his throat when he grinds his cock against your pussy, letting it catch your slick. "Need to take it slow, love... I don't wanna hurt you" Simon groans, aligning his tip with your entrance.
"Oh... god-" you breathe out matched with a long moan from Simon as pushes the tip in. It makes a lewd, sort of wet sound when he enters you. It makes your head spin in the way it makes Simon throw his head back as he pushes deeper until he's completely inside you with a hard thrust.
He rolls his thumb over your clit, waiting for your breath to steady. "Doin' so good, baby... Taking me so well..." He coos, pressing on your clit as his eyes narrow on the sight of your body, all hot just for him. "M-move, Si..." You whimper out, closing your eyes tightly and adjusting to the feel of Simon inside you again after so long.
Simon hums while he rolled his hips, slowly thrusting his cock in and out. It's slow so he can let you adjust, help you remember how good he stretches you out that it makes you all dumb and pliable for him. "Mmm, yeah... Feels so good, love" he grunts, his hips moving just a tad bit faster.
He thrusts all the way to the hilt every single time, and it feels like he goes deeper and deeper with every thrust he gives you. He squeezes at your thighs, his fingers digging into the soft flesh as he parts your legs even more, putting you in a mating press.
It makes you whimper the way you're starting to feel the slight pain of Simon's body pressed right into you. He's like an animal now, fucking you in such a primal way when he growls in your ear, encouraged by the delicious moans you give him and how you squirm and say his name in your breathy, fucked out voice.
"That's it, taking me like such a good fuckin' girl" He chuckles, driving his hips harder, the sound of his skin slapping against your cunt almost drives you crazy. He leans up, letting your legs rest as he massages them gently, a sharp juxtaposition from how hard he's fucking your weeping cunt.
"Needed this so bad, baby..." He groans, pulling your legs around his torso as he leans down to kiss at your neck. You can hear him mumbling sweet little nothings in your ear as his hands grip at your thighs and the soft skin of your waist.
"Tell me y'missed me... I wanna hear it" He mumbles against your neck, moaning lowly. He sounded so calm and so gentle yet the way his cock was filling you up and stretching you out so good was far from gentle. "Tell me y'missed this dick, baby, c'mon..." He hums, his hand travelling up to play with your tits.
"I-I mis-" You started, but the way Simon was fucking you so good made your head spin you couldn't even string a proper sentence together. He laughed, grazing his teeth over the skin of your shoulder, "Awe can't even speak anymore?" He teases, slowing his hips down and it makes you groan in disapproval.
"Why'd you slow down..." you whine, looking at him with half-lidded eyes. "Wanna hear you say you missed me first" He chuckled. It was bad enough that he slowed down, but it's even worse when he pulls out and looks down at you with a cruel smirk, stroking the cock that was supposed to be making you cum.
"Tell me how bad you missed me, baby, you can do it" He laughs lowly and he doesn't look away from you as he fists his cock to the look of pleasure on your face.
"I-I missed you Simon, so much-" you moaned out desperately as your pussy clenched on nothing. You were ready to beg for his cock again if he needed you to but you didn't have to worry for long when he turned you around, stuffing your pussy with his fat cock from behind.
"Good girl... Such a good fuckin' girl, aren't ya?" His words are so dirty it makes you tighten around him with a stifled moan as he fucks you fast and deep, not giving you a chance to adjust to the new angle he's pounding you in.
You can't respond and all you can even do is moan and take Simon's hard dick stuffing you over and over again. It doesn't take long for you to feel that tight knot forming in your stomach and Simon can feel it too from the way you're starting to tighten around him.
"Gonna cum, baby?" He asks you with a drawn out hum as he kneads your ass, watching the way it jiggles with every thrust.
You nod, moaning into your pillows as you clawed at the sheets. "Cum for me then... Cum on my dick..." He coos, pushing your hips down to give himself a better view of your ass. Your arms give out and you're practically being fucked into the bed.
Simon chuckles, taking your wrists and pulling them towards him suddenly. It makes you gasp when you feel the pressure building in your shoulders when Simon tightens his grip on your wrists.
"Si... M'close..." Your voice comes out choked out and broken, spiking up every time he bullies his cock harshly inside you and makes your eyes roll to the back of your head.
"Don't need to tell me baby, just cum f'me..." He mutters breathlessly, now holding your wrists behind your back with one hand as the other lands a harsh slap to your ass, making you whimper.
You gasp as tears rolled down your cheeks from how overwhelmed you were. "Simon... Simon..." your voice shakes as you struggle against his grip on your wrists. "Do it baby, cum for me..." He hums, giving your ass a loving squeeze.
You dig your nails into the sheets when you finally feel that knot in your stomach unravel, you feel tingly all over as you cum on Simon's cock with a loud moan of his name. It makes you whine when he doesn't stop, chasing his orgasm now when he feels your pussy tighten around him so good.
"Fuck baby... That's it, that's it..." His groan turns into a drawn out moan as he throws his head back. With the way you were clenching down on him, it made him sloppy.
Simon was sounding whiny now while he chased his high. His hands were squeezing your hips as he held you down and fucked you harder into the bed. He was babbling now, about how good you felt and how you were such a good girl. All for him.
"Feel's so good, lovie... Let me cum inside, please?" He whined through gritted teeth, leaning down to kiss your shoulder. "Please let me cum inside? Please, baby... Please..." He moans into your skin desperately, leaving wet open-mouthed kisses on your shoulder.
"Yes... Yes, inside..." You nod desperately, feeling overstimulated after just coming down from your high and now being used by Simon to chase his own climax.
"Oh fuck..." His voice shakes as he cums inside you, painting your walls white with his cum as he gives you a few more hard thrusts to make sure you take all of it.
"Thank you, love... Thank you" he whispers after some time had passed, giving your hips an appreciative squeeze as he slowly pulled out of you. You whined when he finally pulled out, leaving you breathless as you felt his hot cum drip from your pussy to your clit.
"So beautiful..." Simon whispers as he lays beside you, pulling you close to him in a warm hug with your back against his chest. He wraps his arms around his waist and means his head down on your shoulder to give you gentle kisses.
"I love you..." He whispered close to your ear as his hands caressed your body soothingly. You hummed in content as you relaxed in his arms and allowed yourself to move a bit closer.
"I love you too..." You say quietly, rubbing his arms which were wrapped around you. Simon hums and kisses your hair, lingering there to take in your scent. "I won't leave again... I promise" he mumbles against your hair, his arms tightening around you ever so slightly.
You nod, looking over your shoulder to give him a warm smile, you were too tired and spent to talk but you knew Simon would be able to know what you were thinking just by looking into your eyes.
He chuckles and presses a soft kiss to your lips briefly. "And you know what's funny?" He laughed softly, raising a hand to caress your cheek, "It's Valentine's day" he looked over to the window and you followed his eyes.
The sun was starting to rise and it made you scoff that Simon really came back to you at the perfect timing.
"We're staying in, that's for sure" you laughed quietly, feeling your eyelids grow heavy as sleep slowly overtook you, but you didn't feel lonely anymore. Simon was back, and he knew he would never leave again.
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lilacgaby · 2 months ago
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operation: start!
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"hey? flower freak. you okay?"
"no." damn this stupid quirk. [name] thought.
she was currently sprawled out on the floor, laid right in front of the dorms. in hindsight, yes it was stupid to lay right there. she should've just walked in, but she wasn't thinking straight.
"oh. sucks to be you."
"yes it does." she was currently face to face with one of her closest friends, and crush, katsuki. for some reason she was adopted by mina at the start of the year, who for some other odd reason, loved to hang with katsuki and his friends.
this led to katsuki and her hanging out one on one occasionally because of their shared affection for romance manga. and because quote on quote, "she's cool for an extra." whatever that meant. it still, embarrassingly, made her heart flutter though.
"are you gonna get up or sit outside like a dumbass?" katsuki quipped, eyeing her off attitude.
"i'm gonna get up, uh-- just don't wait on me!"
"...okay."
with that, bakugo turned and walked back inside. he noted her odd behavior, but shrugged it off. he knew she had just finished a mission.
"oh by the way, i took another volume of maid-sama from your room."
"don't break it!"
he closed the door behind him, leaving her there on the floor.
after an awkward encounter with aizawa, who looked at her as if she grew another head for breaking curfew just to lay on the floor, she got up and walked inside.
mina immediately ran over to her.
"hey girl! how was your patrol?"
"bad." [name] was becoming unsurprised at the way her mouth answered for her.
"what? really what happened?"
don't say it. "i got hit by a truth quirk, i told mirko about my crush on bakugo, and im scared im going to accidentally confess." damn it.
mina's eyes widened at her sudden confession.
"i knew it! sero and denki owe me a thousand yen!"
"wait, you knew?" [name] asked, shocked at the revelation.
"yes girl, duh! your eyes literally sparkle when you see him! and don't think that i missed that flowers start blooming whenever you and him are together! i thought you were dating for a while." mina confessed.
[name] felt her face get hot.
"it's really that obvious?"
"yes."
"aw man. well.. then you have to help me!"
mina tilted her head in confusion. "with what?"
"i-- okay just... let me go shower and meet me in my room."
"ooh! is this gonna be a mission? should i call the girls or the squad?" mina looked a little too enthusiastic for [name]'s taste.
but she trusted mina. she was basically her best friend. so, she relented.
"whoever you think'd be better for this."
mina looked thoughtful. "okay, got it! i'll be in your room in an hour!"
[name] sighed and walked up to the showers.
please mina.. pull through for me.
ʚ ✩ ɞ.
[name] hoped the shower would wash away her anxiety, and it did for a short time. but she was reminded of her impending doom when she saw her entire friend group on her bed.
denki, kirishima, sero, and mina all eyed her as she entered her room. odd how she felt like she wasn't supposed to be in her own room.
"uh.. hey guys."
"hey, heard about the quirk you got hit with." denki commented.
"and about your crush. thanks [name] i won three-thousand yen!" kirishima remarked.
[name] deadpanned.
"anyways, we're all here for operation: save [name] from being embarrassed by her feelings of true love!" mina exclaimed, pulling a chalkboard out of no where.
"we couldn't have come up with a shorter name? how about.. operation: save [name]." sero added.
"yeah but that's too.. ambiguous. we need to know what we're saving her from." kirishima said.
"huh.. how about.. save [name] from bakugo. o:s_fb for short." sero said.
"ooh cool name! makes it feel all professional and stuff!" mina said excitedly as she added it to the board.
meanwhile, [name] just stood there, wishing to be anywhere else. she had so many questions in her mind, but she was broken out of her thoughts as mina wrote:
'keep [name] away from katsuki alone: aka third wheel strategy.'
"huh?" [name] muttered.
"okay guys, we have to third wheel them!
in order to keep our darling [n/name] safe,
we have to make sure he never makes a joke that could make her accidentally confess." mina proposed.
"we will come back here everyday after bakugo goes to sleep at 8, and talk about any changes we have to make to our strategy. got it?"
"got it!" they, minus [name], said in unison.
"oh by the way [name], for how long does the quirk last?"
"a week." she sighed.
the group seemed to fall apart at that.
"third wheeling for an entire week?! that's insane!" denki exclaimed.
"yeah, i don't know about this [name], maybe you should give it up and confess willingly."
"yeah let's start a new operation! operation: perfect confes--"
"no way." [name]'s voice cut through. "i-i can't guys. and i really need your help so.. please? it's just til next sunday. i'll take you guys out to eat as soon as the quirk goes off."
the group all collectively looked over eachother, while mina stood strong. "i was always going to help you with your plan, dumb or not."
"yeah, it wouldn't be manly to force a confession."
they all agreed, and set off to their rooms for the night. they would've broke curfew again, but denki and sero were one strike away from house arrest.
"operation starts tomorrow [name]! don't forget it!" mina said, before leaving with the big ass chalkboard left behind in her room.
[name] sighed and huffed into her pillow.
seven days to go.
i got this.
o:s_fb start!
prev | next!
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artdcnaldson · 5 months ago
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hnnnnghnbhbbn repressed art is so yummy you always match my freak im tweaking rn!!!
also the little nods to patrick adding to his repressed-ness!!!!!! its so scrumptious
i dont know where you wanna take this but i have soooo many ideas i need him so bad
i just keep thinking about her finding loopholes to convince art to give in…
rn now in my mind i have smth smth about her being just so horny and wanting to play, so maybe going to wherever he is and telling him she needs a toy… like asking him for his hand and using it to touch herself and his hand just gets soooo soaked and wet and he really doesn’t wanna move it cause thats immoral, hes just helping out, but maybe hell crook his fingers inside and just watch how she goes crazyyyyyy… maybe he’ll make her squirt… yeah…
ily btw you get me!!!
- 🐚
I’m sorry this took so long that’s my bad baby </3 I read this came passed out died was brought back to life etc. please forgive me 💔
But hngnngngng I imagine he’s so willing and needy after you let him rut against ur thighs and get off :(( all clingy bc he’s like wait maybe she’s the one 🥺
Which is…… but anyways!!
But yeah god he’s just. A living breathing wet dream. He comes in from the courts all sweaty and flushed and smiley, chugging Gatorade or water or whatever. And it just fucking sets you off. You’ve spent weeks soaked and needy with no release outside of your hand. You just need something.
So you ask where Pat is (heading to the country club to swim) and how long he’s going to be gone (three hours max, but no less than one). So you drag him into your room, lock the door.
“Can I use your fingers, baby? You don’t have to move them, just let me play with them. They’re so pretty, I want to feel them. Please?”
And he blushes, looks nervous, but notes. “O-okay. Just tell me what to do.”
He’s so willing, so sweet. He swallows hard when you guide his hand between his thighs, when he feels how warm and wet you are. The first pussy he’s ever touched 🥺 and he gets hard so fast.
But he has to remind himself it’s not for him! He’s trying to help! Like you help. And it’s not wrong as long as he’s not really moving his hand, just like it’s okay if he humps you because it’s just him moving not you <3 so he ignores how hard he is, just lets you guide his hand because he’s just your sweet little toy <3
He thinks it’s interesting, the way you fold down some of his fingers, posing him like a doll. He lets out a choked sort of whine as you press his fingertips to your entrance. You’re so warm and wet inside, tight around his fingers, squeezing him.
He’s flushed the prettiest pink, moaning pathetically as you use his fingers. And his brain is so fuzzy, filled only with the feeling of you hot around his fingers, dripping wet and sticky down his palm.
“Can you—“ you gesture with the hand that’s not circling your clit, curving your fingers.
He shouldn’t. But he’s already got his fingers in your pussy and he’s probably already going to hell anyway. He crooks his fingers so they press against the front wall. Your eyes roll back, you make the prettiest, most desperate sound.
He smiles so proudly as you start grinding down against his fingers, all desperate and needy. Feels your cunt clamping down around him, feels the rush of wetness and release as you finish.
And you look so pretty, chest heaving as you try to catch your breath, mouth ajar as soft moans spill out. You pull his fingers out of your sensitive cunt and Art actually fucking whines at the sight of his fingers glistening and sticky with your juices.
“You can taste,” you encourage with a coy smile. “You’ll like it, I think.”
He moans when he pushes those fingers between his lips, tasting the tang of your arousal. It’s not enough— he laves his tongue over his fingertips and knuckles, trying to swallow down every hint of you.
And you’re laid out before him, legs spread, glistening pussy just fucking teasing him. He wants to just taste you— to bury his face between your thighs, lap at your drenched folds, make you cum again. All him this time, none of your guidance.
But he can’t, the poor thing.
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stumacherstan · 2 years ago
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Book!Carrie with a gn!reader please? The premise is that Carrie is feeling self conscious about her weight, sweat, stench, acne, body in general, and the reader helps her feel good about it
a/n: IM FROTHING AT THE MOUTH!!! I FUCKING LOVE BOOK CARRIE <333 also for this to be possible carrie is alive. everyone survived the massacre as a technicality malfunction and whatnot. or set in an AU where her mother isn’t her over religiousmother,,, but whatever !
book!Carrie White x gn!Reader
Carrie shifted her legs as she looked at her hopeful partner. Unsure of what to say about a sleepover. Doesn’t that lead to things? Partners shouldn’t sleepover without being married. Even then, if it leads to that. How embarrassing. She’s not even,,
“Hey, earth to Carrie!”
Carrie blinked like a doe caught in lights and sheepishly mumbled a sorry. Her little chubby fingers toying with her mousy greasy blonde hair. Making her feel yet again, disgusting and unworthy.
“You’re leaving me again. Do you not want to spend the night? We won’t do anything you don’t want to do! We’ll watch movies and we’ll play some stupid games. Whatever you wanna do. You don’t even have to spend the night at all. We can bake and eat our hearts out and…” As you babbled on about things to do with her. She felt horrible guilt. She should say something.
“(Y/N)!” Her weak nervous voice shut you up and your focus was on her once again. “I-i’m sorry. It’s not that I don’t want to! It’s just,” Carrie trailed off. She didn’t know what to say. Isn’t this something that happens to pretty girls? She didn’t actually take you serious when you asked her out.
Carrie wasn’t expecting a sweet gentle being that played with her gross hair during classes together. She wasn’t expecting sweet little notes in her lockers. She gets mean things and everyone’s so mean to her! Except for you.
You waited patiently for a reply. She was stuck in her train of thoughts again. You were use to this. Carrie was a pretty insecure girl. You could tell, everyone could. You thought she was pretty. She makes herself try to seek small and you want to make her feel comfortable in her skin. She was very much beautiful to you.
“It’s just that I’m me? What if people find out and start bullying you too?” Carrie finally spoke out, looking at you with nerves and fear in her eyes.
“So?” You rolled your eyes. “i don’t care about them. You do, and that’s okay. One day you won’t. But today and every other day, just like yesterday, I don’t care about them.” You took her hands in yours and smiled, “Like I said, you don’t have to spend the night.”
“Okay. I’ll come over tonight.”
Around 6:30 PM (how to do timeskips?):
Your parent was waiting at the door with you. “Go away.”
“No.”
“You’re going to embarrass me.”
“I want to meet her!”
“You’re going to make her nervous!”
knock….
You waited three seconds before opening the door to not make it seem desperate. “Hey gorgeous,” a cheesy smile on your face before your eyes widened. “Uh my (whatever legal guardian you got) is here. They just want to meet you.”
You took her hand in yours, they were a little sweaty, and walked her inside. You knew it was just nerves since she was shaking a little.
“This is Carrie, don’t be weird.”
“I can’t believe I raised you. Anyway! Nice to meet youuu Carrieee, any snacks you want are yours. Drinks are in the fridge as always. If you need anything or a ride a home, just yell for me.” Your parent turned to you. “See. I wasn’t weird.” They walked off.
You sighed deeply and walked Carrie to your room. “Sorry about that.”
“It’s okay. I’m glad they liked me.”
“They’re just happy I have somebody who likes me.”
There was an awkward pause.
“Or maybe I’m moving too fast?”
“No! I do like you. I just don’t know why you like me? I’m not all that pretty.”
“Carrie! You are absolutely beautiful to me.” You looked at her and smiled.
Carrie had tried in the two hours she was given before she came over. She used the fancy hair products she wasn’t allowed to use for once since everything. Carrie made sure to try and smell clean as well and uses scented lotion. Wasn’t this a special occasion?
A night with her partner that’s possibly leading to a sleepover. She didn’t remember trying this hard since The Prom. She didn’t take the date seriously but still went and was horrified to see you. Carrie felt a like a messy pig that was also a sinner all at once.
Tonight she wouldn’t disappoint and tried her best. She couldn’t get rid of want she wanted to. Which is everything. Carrie knew that she could just try. To see you smile at her so adoringly, she felt like she succeeded.
“I think I will spend the night.” Carrie smiled shyly. “I feel very safe here.”
“Wonderful!” You kissed her hand as you guys sat down on bed to watch whatever movies you guys wanted to.
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fallingforel · 1 year ago
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Hey!! What’s up? I was wondering if you could do number 3 on the prompt list with Alex Turner but can you make it like a hurt/comfort thing where maybe they get into some sort of fight? I don’t wanna be too specific because I hate taking away creative freedom but I would love you forever🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🥰
CW:MENTIONS OF SICK.
A/N I am so so so sorry that it has taken me more than a month to get to my requests but i have been super super busy with everything just taking some time out for myself but im back and carrying on with everything while dealing with writers block for arabella ahagaha anyway for those wanting to request... prompt list is here. on with the showwww
PROMPT 3: "I need you"
words: 1,058
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⋆。°✩
"ALEX. GO AWAY. I DON'T FEEL WELL. I DON'T NEED YOU HERE. LOOKING AFTER ME LIKE SOME TINY TODDLER BA-" I shouted from inside the bathroom door, which was cut off by emptying the contents of my stomach into the toilet bowl.
"darling I just want to be here for you. help you."
"yeah well not right now. I don't need you getting sick just before you have to leave for tour tomorrow. I can't let you risk it. If you want to help go stay at a hotel so you don't get infected with whatever I've got going on right now"
"okay. okay. I'm going right now. call me if you need anything. promise"
"I promise Alex. go. I don't need you here."
an hour had passed when I had finally gotten up from the bathroom floor. finally emptying all that I could from my stomach.
"knock knock. I'm coming in." Natalie. my best friend had announced herself.
"ugh. not you as well. Nat I'm fine. I don't need everyone babysitting me. I've dealt with sickness on my own before I don't need everyone looking after me I'm not a child"
"oh wow. I was only coming to say hello. but I've clearly hit a nerve. what's going on nobody mentioned you were sick. in that case stay clear of me I've got a shoot in 3 days. I do not have time to get sick"
"cheers nat. Thanks for looking after me."
"geez with the mood swings. you weren't wanting me to babysit you a few moments ago now you want me to look after you. What's wrong with you anyway"
"well, I've got sore boobs, metallic taste in my mouth all the time, I'm throwing up all the time I'm also tired all the fucking time. I just want this bug to pass so I can go back to happy healthy Y/n"
"Y/n babe when did you last have your period. 2 months ago why???" it took me a moment to realise it. and soon I gasped. "OMG! no I cant be this has come at the worst time I cant be. I'm on the pill and we used a condom"
"not always effective babe."
"okay okay. lets not rush into anything. Can you go pick up a pregnancy test."
"no need. I've got one in my bag for emergencies"
"err... I'm not gonna question that right now, we'll circle back to that one later. but okay I'll go take that right now. you stay here."
⋆。°✩
After waiting what felt like an age but in reality only three minutes I flipped the test over.
POSITIVE 3+ WEEKS
"fucking great. just at the worst time." I whispered to myself.
"Y/n is everything okay in there."
"yeah. I need to be on my own. I'm sorry"
"don't even mention it babe. I'll see myself out now. Want me to lock the door"
"nah leave it open. shut it obviously but don't lock it"
⋆。°✩
I knew I needed to tell Alex. tell him I was sorry before he left and about the baby that was growing inside me at the minute.
The phone rang once twice three times before he finally picked up.
"Y/n babe is everything okay."
"I need you. so bad" I cried down the phone to him
"I'm coming right now sweetheart. do you need anything?" he asked.
"Just a hug"
"okay okay. I'm on my way. Be five minutes top darling"
⋆。°✩
and he really wasn't lying when he said he'd be no longer than 5 minutes because I heard the door go no longer than 3 minutes after I ended the phone call.
"Y/n darling?" he called
"upstairs Alex" I said my voice wavering.
he burst the bathroom door open. and I started sobbing jumping into his arms wrapping my arms round his torso. the both of us swaying from the impact a bit. but we soon stopped and Alex's arms soon wrapped round meeting at my waist. Alex walks the two of us to our shared bedroom sitting us down on the bed.
"woah darling what's this what's got you in such a tizzy?" he asks.
"I'm sorry." I mumble into his shoulder.
"sorry for what sweetheart?"
"sorry for shouting at you. sorry for accusing you for babying us. sorry for the news I'm about to put on you."
"There's no need to apologise for that darling you did nothing wrong." It takes him a moment for him to realise my last statement from my previous statement.
"Y/n what news what are you going on about? You are really freaking me out honey."
"Stay here" I pull myself out of his arms, and walk to the bathroom where the pregnancy test lay on top of the toilet.
"This is the news." I say walking back into the bedroom sitting on the bed next to him and pass him the pregnancy test that lay in my hand.
"You mean- You mean we're going to be parents?"
"Not if you don't want to be."
"Not if I dont? Darling of course I want to be a parent. Do you want to be?"
"of course I do its just-"
"it's just what?"
"Its just. Is now even the right time to become preganant especially when you leave for tour tomorrow. What about in 9 months time? What about when I become too fat to walk anywhere."
"That won't happen sweetheart. because you aren't gonna become fat. You'll have a baby in your tummy. Our baby. And as for the tour. You'll come with me, we can sort out something. we're doing the asia america and australia first and then in 4 months we'll be in the UK and your joining me for every single leg sweetheart the tour wont effect your pregnancy, we'll be home before babys here and there'll still be time for nesting getting baby ready and everything else."
"okay. thank you Alex. for calming my worries. We're going to be parents." I say pulling him into a hug.
"Damn right we are."
⋆。°✩
9 months later.
INSTAGRAM
yourusername
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liked by sam_fender, Harrystyles, mattjhelders and 1,890 others
yourusername Gianna Louise Turner 13/05/23
mattjhelders: shes beautiful y/n
breanahelders: amelia finally has someone to play with
↳yourinstagram: not too soon though, shes only just been born 😂
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bloogers-boogers · 1 year ago
Text
College Au where Cartman and Kyle dated during middle school and half of high school, however they broke up (Eric) bc his mother kicked him out and had nowhere else to go, Kyle did try to help him but he couldn't let him stay more than a couple of days in his house bc his parents felt pity over Eric's situation but like they say, you become a intruder/ burden after three days.
The problem wasn't Kyle not being able to help Cartman's situation, everything was mellow in their relationship; still taking care of him while he wondered off from park, houses, basements to sleeping inside cars of his fellow classmates (believe it or not but Craig and Clydes cars were always available for him if needed) Kenny let him crash just for a week because his alcoholic dad kicked him out while Kenny was on his shift however Karen apologized for the way he acted with a huge hug which warmed Cartman's heart and spared Stewart's life. Sometimes even Wendy let him stay in her room secretly from her parents as a favor for Stan (tho internally she actually felt bad for Cartman). Anyways, returning to the actual issue was when he finally crashed at Stan's; further away from town in the farm.
Sharon took pity of Cartman welcoming him with open arms and Randy didn't care much in exchange of a "free" employee which annoyed Stan. Stan welcomed him to "hell" as he called it and lead him to the guest room.
This is where things become complicated, while being in the farm Cartman spent most of his time with Stan which provoked a lot of complications in his relationship with Kyle because of this new found feelings against those two immediate closeness: jealousy. Kyle began feeling insecurities arrise in his conscience and his annoyance became more noticeable for both Cartman and Stan, however at first it was only Stan who noticed it while Cartman was oblivious to the whole thing.
It wasn't difficult to notice Kyle's immense glaring and indirect insults at Stan's person. He was suspicious over every little thing they did, commented negatively with every "inside joke" they shared. Stan immediately pointed out his bullshit which caused conflict between both best friends.
They split up, however, Stan still did not let this situation affect Cartman and his stay at the farm.
Ofcourse, after the split up Kyle was even more cranky... that's where he began to lash his anger and repressed jealousy on to Cartman. And that's where Cartman grew tired of it after months of the same shit he broke up with Kyle.
"¡IT'S ALWAYS THE SAME WITH YOU! IT'S LIKE YOU DON'T EVEN CARE OF WHAT I FEEL!
YOU'RE ALWAYS LIKE, STAN THIS STAN THAT WHY DON'T YOU FUCKING GO FUCK STAN THEN!??"
"We literally live under the same roof it's not like I can ignore him, Kahl???"
"¡You're pretty good at ignoring me!"
"I'm not ignoring you! It's was just one text which I answer a little late than usual; but it was because Randy wanted me to pick up Towelie from the gas station cause he had overdose!"
"You could be lying for me to not get suspicious of you two, when you we're probably fooling around with Stan!"
"¡¡THAT FUCKING DOES IT!! ¡IM DONE! I CAN'T TAKE YOU ANYMORE! IM BREAKING UP WITH YOU!"
"... excuse me?"
"Like you fucking heard it, Kyle. We're over."
After that, there was three periods of their breakup; from Kyle acting dismissive/denial (still in shock) for what had happened to second stage, (realizing it was serious/ it mattered) begging for Cartman to take him back and lastly acceptance (grief/sorrow/guilt).
During this period Kyle and Stan reconnected and made peace. They weren't "super best friends" but they we're friends nonetheless.
Eventually at the end of last year of high school both Kyle and Cartman had no choice but to make amends after getting trapped in a escape room for over five hours while they had been in a typical adventure of theirs. Kyle took this as an a opportunity to apologize and somewhat hopeful they could give each other a second chance. But Cartman just accepted his apology and moved on from a emotional confrontation to attempting again to unlock the door of the room. Kyle ofcourse didn't initiate any moves on Cartman but he did expect for Cartman to atleast do it himself, he was left disappointed that night.
And as time flew by quick, they had said their goodbyes and left opposite ways. By this point the Marshes had become Cartman's second and only family. Which helped him be able to go into a good college. (For Stan’s dismay Cartman had become Randy's favorite "Marsh" so he had made sure first to assure Cartman a good college plan instead of his actual son; luckily for Stan his mother had him secured it's not like they had their doubts on using Randy's sketchy money anyways and it's not like Cartman cared enough to question where it came from either.)
However, after two years in Stanford university. He bumped into Kyle.
They were left stoked; but for different reasons. Kyle was by Eric's (still) immense beauty and resurfaced feelings while Cartman was just wondering what the fuck was Kyle doing there when he was supposed to be studying in Harvard.
They awkwardly greeted each other not knowing what to say, but the dreaded silence was broken immediately when some blonde guy approached Eric and slid his arm around Eric's shoulder. That was enough to give Kyle the hint that Cartman had already moved on and was taken. However, this did not affect him in the slightest, he kept his posture and cleared his throat.
"I see you're still studying in Stanford, Fatass."
The blonde arched a brow to this; unaware of the dynamic only he and Eric's close friends had. Cartman just gesture the blonde a small wave, clearing things up before the blonde could take it as a actual threat.
"Don't take it seriously, Bruce. This is how this peculiar jew is," Cartman wink at Kyle, a playful gesture that was supposed to be taken as a initiative of breaking the awkward tension between them.
However, Kyle's feelings were in a twist and wanted badly to scoop Cartman in his arms and claim him as his.
"What brings you to Stanford, jewboy?"
By this point, Bruce had left not before planting a kiss goodbye to Cartman a way to mark his ground, side eying Kyle as he walked away which left Kyle with a taste of bitterness and his competitive spirit grew stronger.
He gulped, not really giving the actual and real reason to why, "Oh, you know... it wasn't my thing, but I heard Stanford wasn’t a bad place. So I decided to give it a shot."
"You left Harvard for Stanford?" Cartman asked almost incredulous.
"Yes." Kyle answered flatly, "you know, Harvard isn't all that." He shrugged, wanting desperately to skip the reasoning of his move to Stanford.
Cartman chuckled amused, seemingly not believing it still, but dropped it.
After this, Kyle and Cartman remained in a decent distance. Boundaries weren't broken however they did cross paths and did hang out together from time to time, ate lunch sometimes and if the opportunity was given study alongside each other. But it was all very casual and never beyond anything more than friends. Cartman was still dating that Bruce guy so Kyle remained tame about his advances with Cartman.
But the moment he heard from a close friend of his who also had a friend group close to Cartman's; that he had broken up with Bruce that same evening he dashed towards the dormitory area where Cartman was and "stumbled" across a messy Cartman. Which took Kyle off guard, cause he's never seen Cartman be this broken it somewhat made him feel a little jealous, envious maybe? cause Cartman never seem this heartbroken over their own breakup, 'How the fuck does this dumb frat boy get Cartman to react like this but with me he didn't bat an eye?' Ofcourse he didn't take it to heart, and instead of making any moves on him he stayed by his side comforting him over his fresh breakup.
"It's okay, man. There's plenty of other people out there (me)"
*sniif* "I thought he was the one, Kahl," Kyle resist the urge to 'tsk', he hated seeing Cartman cry but more so to hear him declare someone else to be "the one" that wasn't him.
"He was a total chad, I'm surprised you didn't see that coming."
"Kahl you're not helping.."
"I just don't want you to act like a total pussy for someone who doesn't deserve your whimpers. You're better than this, you don't need to be crying for some cheating douche."
"... thanks Kyle.." *sniff*
But that sympathy didn't last long, and after a day he called Cartman and invited him out with all intention to begin pursuing Cartman. He justified his selfish behavior with the fact that Cartman would be way happier better off with him instead, and no longer care about Bruce once he shows him how much better it'll be if they got together.
He knew Cartman was healing, fuck, normally he should be recommending for Cartman to take a break from relationships all together. But fuck no. He had wasted long enough waiting, he wasn't planning to waste more time. To wait for some miracle to mysteriously happen in his favor, he had to make his own miracle happen and that was to make Cartman his again.
It's delusional cause he dropped outta Harvard cause he just couldn't bare the thought of being so far away from Cartman, he couldn't concentrate at all, his mind betrayed him plenty of times and wondered to Cartman.
So in his logic, getting into Stanford will make it easy a bit and finally able to pursue his carrier with no distractions. Yes, Cartman was a distraction but having him close, around.. just eased all his worries as he wondered back in to his studies.
So technically, it worked.
So his choices weren't all in vain, however part of his plan on getting back with Cartman went outta rail after realizing he had moved on but that didn't stop him from deciding to pursue the second he got out of that relationship.
Technically it wasn't his fault the frat boy couldn't remain faithful? So ofcourse, he didn't feel a ounce of sympathy or pity after sliding his tongue inside Cartman's mouth after a long confrontation by Cartman over "someone" casually framing Bruce for assault of a fellow student from the campus, dumped him in middle of a ceremony only in his underware and green slime while also being publicly humiliated by people posting on social medias of the whole humiliating display.
Kyle wonders who'd dare did that, but he didn't think much of it as his mind focused on making out with Cartman; grabbing every inch of his soft body, biting, nibbling his skin. Kissing his face then biting his collarbone, showing in all freedom his desire, the repressed feelings he had for him into passionate kisses, his devoted and loyal soul, his burning carnal hunger, the sorrow of losing him.
Gripping Cartman's wrists as he bends him over and somewhat eyeing the photo Cartman still had in his night stand; of him and Bruce. He put it down with his free hand as he then digged his teeth in Cartman's neck making him moan and gasp suddenly.
However, Kyle then woke up, after his alarm resonated the walls of his dorm. Greeting him with the reality that he was in fact dreaming and still had yet to start making a plan to get rid of Bruce who somehow managed to get Cartman back after being an unfaithful piece of shit.
And yeah, a lot of jealously/possessive Kyle continues 😅
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cohendyke · 7 days ago
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8, 9 15 for the ask game :)
hiii <3
8- recurring dream?
ough i have a lot of dreams of leonard cohen where he drops the most crazy insane lines to me while we’re cooking or sitting at a bar and when i wake up it actually does feel like he’s spoken to me. also dreams of/pertaining to my grandfather but those are ptsd related i think… sorry that’s a downer. anyway
9- favourite childhood anecdote?
okay under a cut because it’s kind of long but i promise it’s funny and it will make you laugh!
15- is there a place you consider home?
nova scotia for sure which is funny because i’ve never actually lived there but that’s where my parents grew up. most of my summers growing up were spent there visiting family and my parents friends and my parents always referred to it as home so that’s something i’ve inherited :’) little tangent i think that’s why kate beatons memoir ducks hit so hard because my parents left nova scotia to seek better jobs/lives in alberta but home/nova scotia was so ingrained in them that it was passed on to me. anyway!
okay heres my favourite and in retrospect the funniest thing to happen to me…
the first time i ever babysat my siblings i was eleven (brother was 9 sister was 5) and my mum promised me ten dollars for four hours. the only rule was i had to clean up after dinner and no one was playing outside and no one was coming inside. well about an hour in my brothers friend brady (who was an only child and a spoiled brat) comes to the door and asks “can brad play.” i said no but this kid was fucking relentless so i said okay fine. five minutes then you have to go because no one’s allowed inside. about five minutes later i go to kick my brothers friend out and as im telling him he has to leave he’s bouncing on an exercise ball against my brothers bookshelf and this crib board fell and hit him on the head. me and my brother go “holy shit brady are you okay?” and he’s like yeah i’m fine BUT. it hit his forehead and anyone who’s ever hit their forehead knows that that shit BLEEDS. a lot. so he sees his blood covered hands and he loses his shit and starts running all over the carpeted upstairs screaming call 911 call 911!!! now i knew he didn’t need an ambulance he just MAYBE needed stitches but my dumbass handed the phone to him so he could dial his mum. this fool dials 911 and passes it to me.
okay context break in alberta if you call 911 and hang up you get fucking fined because 911 still needs to come to make sure you’re alive. it’s an insane fine too it was like 1000 dollars back then. and this was on a landline phone so they would have known who did this and who’s house to come to. so i’m on the phone with the operator trying to save my parents a thousand dollars and i think she thought his head injury was a lot worse than it was because she was asking if i could see bone and if he was conscious.. etc. anyway as im on the phone brady and brad have settled on the stairs. brady took his shirt off and wrapped it around his head and was overall acting like he was a soldier dying in the trenches. brad was crying and holding his hand and saying “please ellie don’t let brady die.” and i was like he’s going to be fine…. anyway the ambulances come i ran barefoot to this kids house to get his mum the whole neighborhood is outside our house and im having the biggest panic attack of my life. all my neighbors (including the former nhl player and his wife) were like “ellie it’s going to be okay. accidents happen. everything is going to be okay.” but i knew better because i broke the one rule!!! the police are there because technically three children were left unattended and they called my mum home from her yoga class. she comes home and i’m sitting in our home office and sobbing and i said “i never want to babysit again…” and she was like don’t worry :) you won’t. now i have to go to the police station to prove im not a neglectful parent. meanwhile our house looks like a crime scene because there is blood EVERYWHERE (he went in every fucking room of the house and got blood on every surface. the tv in the living room. my little sisters room. the WALLS. the carpet the floor the couch. etc) because he was running all through our house screaming call 911. the next morning i threw up and i told my mum and she was like tough shit. get ready for school. my dad was on a business trip to houston and he face timed me and i got so excited because his trips were so busy he didn’t get to call often. so i pick up and it was just a call to say how disappointed he was. EVENTUALLY my parents asked me what happened and they felt bad at how mad they were at me so it has a happy ending but man. very edward little coded of me i have to say. like and comment if you made it to the end. mwah <3
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myprophecy · 5 months ago
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𓏲 ๋࣭  ࣪ ˖ again & again & again & again. do it again! do it again!
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pairing: will solace x child of aphrodite
warning: pining, cursing.
synopsis: a messy healer is in love with the perfect child of aphrodite. of course, he doesn't stand a chance. . .or does he?
a/n: i don't know how to write kissing scenes ahhh!!
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YOU WERE way out of wills league. of course, the boy wasn't delusional. he knew he was nothing compared to you, an aphrodite kid.
his blonde curls were always in a messy bun, for he had no time to take care of himself working in the infirmary, while your hair was always looked after. styled perfectly, not a single hair out of place.
you had an amazing style, your statements leaving him red cheeked and shy. on the other hand, he threw on whatever he saw first and then covered his atrocity of an outfit with his huge doctor coat.
and the list can go on.
in conclusion, will was a mess. you were perfection.
yet, he couldn't help but love you, even though he knew it would get him nowhere in the end.
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surprisingly, it was a slow sunday morning in the infirmary. will and few of his siblings were chatting softly, chuckling here and there.
they paused their conversation when they heard the creaking of the door opening, before will was able to turn around and look at who had came in, he saw kayla smiling wickedly.
"i need you guys to help me restock the back, come on." she said, gesturing for the other apollo kids to follow her.
wills eye twitched. 'of course those fuckers make me do all the work-' his thoughts were cut short by your shy smile and small wave.
"good morning. i am so, so sorry for the ungodly hour." you apologised, fidgeting with one of your many rings.
will blinked, cheeks red and lips slightly parted.
"you see, i was sword fighting and an ares kid accidentally cut my arm," you gestured to a rather deep cut on you bicep. "is there. . .um," you cleared your throat awkwardly as will continued looking like a deer in headlights. "is there anyway i can get it healed? i understand if its too early to use your healing powers-"
"o-of course!" the tired blonde cut you off, "its never too early to heal a fellow camper, duty calls!" he offered a nervous smile, guiding you to an infirmary bed.
'i am going to kill kayla after this.' he thought.
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it was awkward. extremely awkward. will tried to make small talk two or three times, yet the words wouldn't leave his mouth.
as the tired healer bandaged you up, you suddenly asked a question.
"have i done something wrong?"
will raised his head from your injury, tilting his head slightly, silently asking you to elaborate.
". . .you are normally so friendly and talkative, but whenever im near you just. . .stop." you started, voice soft as you ran a hand through your hair. "have i done something wrong?"
"y/n. . ."
"i really want to be your friend, will." you cut him off, "you are so amazing and beautiful and kind. . .i just want to be close to you." you rambled, oblivious to the effect your words had on the son of apollo. "so, tell me. have i done something wrong?" you repeated once more, your eyes meeting his.
will looked speechless, hesitantly placing his warm palm on your cheek. "y/n, you've done nothing wrong." he gave you that small, charming smile you could die for. ". . .i'm just. . ." the blue eyed boy sighed, placing his other palm on your free cheek, now completely cupping your face.
"you're just what?"
will took a deep breath,
"im just shy. you are so. . .perfect, y/n. every time i see you, my brain becomes mush and my mouth dries up." he confessed quietly, cheeks red as he looked away.
"you are so beautiful both inside and out i can't help but-" the blonde was cut off by you placing a finger on his lips, biting your bottom lip in an attempt not to laugh.
"william andrew solace, you are a fucking moron."
"oh, please!-"
he was once more silenced as you leaned in and pressed your soft lips on his.
maybe, he would let you win. just this once.
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conanaintslick · 6 years ago
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#today was truely terrible#im finally getting to bed at 1:30#all i wanted was to make jewlery#so i can finally make my etsy and maybe earn some money#because im fucking broke#literally i cant afford to eat and the rents are getting tired of supporting me since they pay for school and all#anyway#our pool broke and flooded the neighbor's yard#we lost a lot of water so the water bill is gonna suck#i bought a window seat for my cat because i want him to stay inside more and thought a little seat would be nice#but it took forever to set up#and so many people were texting me despite the fact that people literally NEVER message me#and whenever im trying to focus my phone going off constantly really puts me on edge idk why#it didnt help that the instructions were basically gibberish and i basically had to figure out how to put the thing together on my own#and then it was a pain to put on the window because its supposed to just stick but getting it straight was a nightmare#so then i decided to draw a little because i maybe wanna make a web comic (even though i suck at drawing)#but my tablet was being super glitchy so i only finished one four panel strip#so i decided to make some jewlery#but when i got out my beads hey got jolted and the beads got totally mixed up#and i spent three hours trying to sort them#and only managed to get one color out of four sorted#so i decided to just give up and sort the rest tomorrow#but when i got up i accidentally knocked the container i had the beads in and they went everywhere#we have a bunch of animals so just leaving them all over the floor wasnt a good idea#so i spent another hour and a half cleaning them up#because every time i got even close to finishing the container got jolted again#and the beads would go everywhere again#so that took five tries and even then there are still a couple beads here and there#so yeah its been fuckinf awful and i just had to rant even though its stupid because this is literally a detective conan side blog
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hugheshugs · 3 years ago
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his only fear | q. hughes
part three of the milkshakes au
part two
join my taglist !
summary: you get in trouble with your parents after your first date with quinn and have your phone taken away. the lack of communication scares him and you end up at his house to apologize.
pairing: grumpy!quinn x reader (he isnt too grumpy in this one.. in fact, we got SOFT grumpy!quinn, how cute)
word count: 1.4k
note: im so sorry this took so long !! also, i know this one kinda speeds things up but i just wanna get it going cuz i love this au a lot. i know my imagines are usually a bit longer so i apologize for the shorter word count this time. i hope you guys like this one <3
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you chew on the skin of your bottom lip and fiddle with your fingers as you and mabel stand on the doorstep of the hughes household once again.
after your milkshake date with quinn, he added his number into your phone and dropped you home. everything was going great until you realized you had gotten home past your curfew.
well, you didn't exactly realize it, for it had been on your mind the whole evening and you hadn't told quinn — you lost track of time and made it home at nearly 11pm, almost half an hour after your expected arrival back home. you stood on your porch, wondering how to explain the situation to your parents but the front door opened and pulled you inside in an instant. you couldn't even wave goodbye to quinn who had parked a bit further away from your house like you'd asked and who had been waiting for you to get inside safely.
you ended up coming up with some random excuse about mabel which your parents believed because they're very strict about the no boys rule and they trust you entirely not to disobey them. you didn't think you were in trouble, only being sent to your room for the rest of the night. you texted quinn as you laid on your bed and he replied you as soon as he got home.
that lasted a day.
you and quinn texted back and forth, almost non stop for the next 24 hours. then, your parents decided they did in fact want to punish you and your phone had been taken away for days. as soon as you got it back, you texted mabel and noticed a couple agitated texts from quinn. you didn't reply, wanting to explain yourself to him in person and that's how you found yourself here, with mabel, in front of his house.
"i think he.. i think he might be mad," you say quietly, knocking on the door. you were incredibly nervous to see him again, especially because you think he might think you ghosted him. the idea of doing that to him would never even cross your mind.
"quinn's always pissed, no doubt he will be. but if he takes it out on you, he's in for it."
"thanks t-that totally helped."
you roll your eyes, the beats of your heart only speeding up after hearing her words. you rest a hand on your chest and begin scratching your skin, a nervous habit you developed in high school.
the door opens and a blonde haired woman who you instantly recognize as quinn's mom is there to greet you both. you haven't properly met her or been introduced to her yet. your only other interaction was when she came home to you and mabel sitting on the couch talking to her two sons, quinn not being able to take his eyes off you.
you want to make a good impression, hoping whatever you and quinn have will last.
"oh, hi girls!" she grins and you give her a smile.
"hi, i'm— i'm y/n. i don't think we've properly met," you hold out a hand for her to shake but she pulls you in for a tight hug.
your eyebrows furrow, not used to such parental affection, but you wrap your arms around her, anyway.
"no need to be formal with me, honey. i'm ellen, it's so great to see you again," she pats your back as she pulls away.
"you— you remember me?"
"of course i do, i could never forget the girl who has my grouchy son wrapped around her finger," she laughs, confusing you even more but you hide it by chuckling.
"c'mon in," she moves to the side, letting you both step in. "jack's in the living room and quinn's upstairs."
mabel makes a beeline for the living room but you stay frozen in your spot, not knowing where to go. you don't really want to intrude by walking upstairs in an unfamiliar home so you stay put and stand beside ellen.
"oh, i forgot you're the shy one," she mutters to herself. "quinn, y/n's here!"
sweat forms at your brow and you wipe it with the back of your hand, your heart leaping out of your chest when you see quinn at the top of the stairs.
"okay, and?"
he makes eye contact with you as he walks down and your stomach drops at his words. he's mad.
"quinn, don't be rude."
"i was kidding, mom."
"are you.. are you upset? i-i swear i didn't mean to ignore you," you ask when he stands in front of you, both his and his moms gazes intimidating you more than ever.
"i got.. in— in trouble a-and my phone was taken away and i really didn't mean to not reply to your texts, i just couldn't and i'm really sorry, please.. please don't be mad," you explain shakily. tears begin to brim at the sides of your eyelids but you refuse to let them fall, not wanting to seem weak (even though you know for a fact that you are).
quinn stays silent, crossing his arms and looking down at you with what seemed like a death stare.
"don't just let the poor girl stand there, quinn," ellen butts in, almost glaring at her son for the way he's acting.
he gives her a look, not a mean one but a silently pleading one that makes her walk away and leave you two alone. he runs a hand through your hair and you subconsciously find comfort and lean into it.
"i don't get scared easily. yeah, we've only known each other for a couple weeks but tell me why my heart's been racing over the thought of you. do you know how many sleepless nights i spent wondering if you were okay? thank god for mabel, otherwise i would have flipped this goddamn town around in search of you. i'm not mad, not at all, but i was afraid. and now i'm trying to digest the fact that you're okay. that you're standing in front of me, perfectly fine."
his words bring another round of tears to your eyes. no one has ever expressed this much concern for you. not to mention this is the most you've ever heard him talk and it was all about how scared he was for you. solely after one date, after one mediocre date (that was absolutely perfect in your eyes), he's developed an attachment to you. one that he knows will be the death of him, and it means the world and more to you that he cares so much.
"i'm.. i'm sorry i-i scared you. i didn't think you'd care, otherwise i would've tried to g-get here earlier or something," you say quietly, giving a small shrug.
"you know now and i don't know when i'll say that again so you better cherish everything i just said," he narrows his eyes at you, wiping away some stray tears you didn't realize had fallen.
"i don't like it when you cry," he mumbles, pulling you into his chest and cradling your head with his hand.
he rocks you back and forth after you wrap your arms around him and gives you a small squeeze.
heat rises to your cheeks and you smile, nuzzling into him. as much as you wish to stay in this position forever, a small cough fills both your ears and you pull out of quinns grasp to face the sound.
jack and mabel stand a few feet away, wiggling their eyebrows.
"what do you want, jack?" quinn groans in annoyance.
"we were going to get froyo so we were wondering if you guys wanna come," he replies innocently.
quinn turns towards you. "do you wanna go?"
"if— if you want to."
he gives you a you better tell me what you want look, and you hesitate to reply but look up at him and slowly nod your head. he almost smiles but runs back upstairs to grab his wallet, not wanting anyone to see the way you make him feel.
you stand with the pair quietly, both of them teasing you about quinn until he comes back and glares at them. he wraps an arm around you and you're off to what may be your next perfect date.
--
taglist <3 @harlowhockeystick @nucksgal03 @this-is-ally-and-im-confused @calemakarjuice @everythinghughes @stars-canucks @livelaughloveurdad @idfan21 @joelsfarabees @oowenspower @thescooby-gang @1-800-iluvhockey @boeswhore @talksoprettyjjx @itspbjellytime @nicoleloveshockey @rainysuitcaseprunegiant @owenpowerstapejob @xoxo-ceebs @drei-mrssvechii @bbrissonn @owenpwr @owenpowersglasses @mattybolds
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miekasa · 3 years ago
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Mie, I’m begging for some Jean college au bf hcs - im literally so down bad for this man and the way you write men is just 🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻
Absolutely, not a problem 😌 I saved this ask as a draft a while ago when you sent it, sorry for just now getting to it. Anyway, I love Jean with my whole heart, best boy, best boyfriend <33
King of forehead kisses, and not even just because of his height in comparison to yours; he just likes it. He likes the feeling of pressing his lips against your skin, and making you feel safe.
Brings you tea or coffee however you like it every day without fail. If he can get it to you in the morning before work/school then he’ll do that, if not he’ll meet you some time in the middle of the day to drop it off. Your own personal courier just for drinks.
He… has a thing for long(er) nails. He loves the feeling of them against his skin, even if you’re not scratching to apply pressure—just you holding his hand them grazing his skin is enough for him.
That being said, he will pay for you to get your nails done. Actually, he’ll pay for… almost anything you want, but the nails benefit him as much as they do you so feel free to ball out.
He never blowdries his hair because he doesn’t... know how to do the back of it. You did it for him once and he hasn’t stopped thinking about it since, but he’s also too embarrassed to ask you to do/style it again.
On the subject of hair, he does do his best to style it and take care of it, but he’s a sucker whenever you play with it. Sometimes he feigns like you’re messing up all his hard work, but he’ll literally crane his head into your touch. He loves it. 
The first time he lays on top of you and you run your hands through his hair... top 10 most euphoric moments of his life. He tries to fight off the sleep threatening to take over him, but it’s futile. Give it 15 minutes at most before he’s knocked out like a baby. 
Dogs love him. Anytime you’re in a park or just taking a walk and there’s a dog around, it’ll come up to him and he looks adorable leaning down to pet it. He loves dogs, too! So he’s always happy to stop and pet them. He’d be a 10/10 dog dad. 
Has your name saved in his phone with two hearts at the end. Do not point it out.
Loves taking pictures together and if you guys are on a date, he’ll ask someone to get a picture for him. He just likes having them to look back on (and to send to his mom, later).
He doesn’t mind painting classes or videos or tutorials, but he hates paint by numbers kits. He claims that they have no sense of color theory and that it takes the originality and fun out of painting. Not to mention the quality of the paints isn’t great to begin with; all of which he takes very seriously.
It’s pretty cute actually, to see him get worked up over the paint kits. He claims that painting and drawing isn’t even something he takes “that seriously,” it’s just a hobby for him (one he’s insanely good at); but in moments like these, you can tell that he’s way more into art and art theory and history than he lets on. 
Huge movie guy, from animated movies to martial arts movies, Jean is usually willingly to give anything a watch at least once. When he’s high, he can go on about his favorite directors and art styles and movie details for hours if you don’t stop him. It’s super cute. Just don’t bring up Moana, because he’ll start crying. 
Arm around the shoulder kind of boyfriend for sure. It’s a casual way of keeping you near him and letting everyone know that you guys are together. Plus it allows for him to easily pull you into him for a quick forehead kiss when needed.
Listen. If you hug his arm, he’s on cloud nine. He tries to be nonchalant about it but he’s about three seconds away from his eyes rolling back in his head it feels that good to him. Bonus if you lean your head on his bicep a little—then he’s a goner.
He takes his bagels very seriously and believes that both you and him deserve nothing but the best quality bagels. He’ll grumble if a bakery gives you guys a less than favorable one and make a note that taking the long route to get to his favorite place is much more worth it.
Always makes you walk on the side furthest from the cars. If he notices you’re not, he’ll just shuffle behind you until he’s shouldering the street and you’re on the inside. 
He grew up on a kind of modern ranch situation; not exactly all the way in the countryside, but not isolate from the city, either. Because of this, he knows how to ride horses, take care of smaller farm animals, tend to plants, and yes he knows how to use a lasso. You wouldn’t know any of that though, because he never ever talks about it. The only way you find out is when he takes you to visit his mom’s house for the first time, and she asks him for a hand around the place. 
(He’s got a cowboy hat, too, but refuses to put it on. He got it when he was, like, nine, okay, leave him alone). 
When he thinks you look tired, he’ll wrap his arms around your shoulders to hug you. It’s usually followed up with a kiss to your head, and a promise that you guys will go home soon and get food on the way. 
He’s a really good cook. He just understands and flavors and pairings really well, so he doesn’t need a recipe to make something that tastes good; he just kind of knows what to add to get the balance he’s looking for. 
Naturally, he’ll cook for you. Especially if he finds out that you haven’t eaten all day/in a long time. He doesn’t care if it’s 11pm and it might seem excessive to make steak and potatoes with a side salad at this hour, he’s gonna do it to make sure you eat, and you are going to sit there and watch. 
He also bakes pretty well, though he isn’t as experimental with his baking as he is with his cooking. He usually sticks to what he knows, and it’s not cupcakes and brownies and cakes; he’s better at croissants, and cheesecakes, and canelés. 
Dating Jean means getting along with his friends. If you guys didn’t know each other before you started dating, be prepared to be ambushed by Connie and Sasha (after Jean stops hiding you away and gives them the green light lmfao). Neither of them waste time with the small talk and formalities; straight into mini golfing and beer pong. They make you feel welcome right away.
Sasha always teases that you’re too good for Jean, and that she might just steal you away for herself some day. Sasha is also Jean’s main confidant, so she really knows just how much he loves you, and yeah, she teases him for being lovesick, but really she’s happy for Jean. And proud of him for facing his feelings like this. 
Connie adores you, and you know he trusts you when he starts going to you for advice/help. Could be anything from schoolwork, to what color he should get his new shoes in. He’s also the one who, surprisingly, you have the sentimental talks with about your relationship with Jean. It’s easy to overlook, but Connie loves Jean, and he’s come to love you too; he just wants you both to be happy, so he’s there to listen when you need it. 
Jean waits outside of your classroom after you’ve had a test or presentation, usually with a drink or a snack, or the promise of taking you out as a treat. Always tells you he’s proud of you, and is there to comfort you if you think you didn’t do too well. 
He does not shut up about whatever major you’re in. It could be the same as his; it could be the complete opposite as his. He thinks it’s so sick that you’re doing it, you make it look cooler, you make it look better, and he’s certain you’re the smartest person in your program. 
He’s pretty serious about his studies, too, so he’s always down to study with you in the library whenever you’re both free. More often than not, he shows up after you, usually with food or extra chargers. He greets you with a kiss on the forehead, and asks you how you are while massaging your shoulders gently. If it’s been a while since you took a break, that’s the first item on the list, after that, he gets to work and stays with you until you’re ready to go, even if he doesn’t have as much work to do. 
He always sits across from you. This goes for when you’re in the library, or out to eat at a restaurant; Jean loves sitting across from you. He gets to see your face the best that way, and he adores looking into your eyes when you talk. 
He’s not... not a morning person. He’s not up at 6am ready to grind, but he wakes up before noon; let’s say 10am is his happy medium. That being said, if you wake up before him, regardless of the time, there’s a 9/10 chance he’ll lay on your back and tell you to hush so you guys can sleep for 10 more minutes. 
If you’re (close) friends with Eren, Mikasa, and Armin, Jean is... happy you’ve got people to rely on, but, “Of all people on the planet, you put your trust in Jaeger?” He acts so bitter (because he is), but deep down inside, he’s glad you have Eren to rely on if you need to. 
(Also, you have to humble him and remind him that he and Eren aren’t all that different. If you like him, why wouldn’t you get along with Eren, bye). 
Turns out though, that it’s not Eren who threatens to beat him up if he breaks your heart. It’s not even Mikasa, although, her threat goes without saying; it’s Armin he’s terrified of.
The last time Armin hated someone, it was this guy in your program, who happened to share a few mutual classes with him, too. Jean never knew the full story, just that he’s pretty sure that kid dropped out the following semester. 
If you have a job on campus, Jean usually doesn’t show up while you’re working (knowing how embarrassed he would be if you did that to him), unless you work the night shift and it’s dead. Connie, however, does show up; usually in some kind of crisis (“Please help me, I don’t know what the fuck APA formatting is and this is due tonight, please, please, please!!”). Your coworkers actually thought Connie was your boyfriend for a minute. That’s when Jean starts showing up more lmfao.
He makes it a point to go on a scheduled, night out, kind of date at least twice a month. He knows life gets busy with school and work and midterms, but he always makes sure you both set side a time to take a well-deserved break and be with each other. 
He’s the romantic type, so these dates are pretty swoon worthy, too. Drive-in movies, nice dinners, classy art exhibits, Jean plans it all. On that note, he really likes planning dates; he just doesn’t like talking about them with his friends beforehand. 
All in all, very romantic, very precious boyfriend. He’s always thinking about you, what you need, and how he can help you out. You’re one of his main priorities, and he just wants to treat you right. 
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jade-parcels · 3 years ago
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The genshin men: fatherhood edition
With: Childe, Zhongli, Kaeya, Diluc, Xiao, Venti, Albedo and Baizhu
—————————
Childe:
Ajax loves kids and he’ll make that known early on in your relationship
Like...This man wants five or more kids but he’ll settle for four. He dreams of a big family, getting to surround himself with you and your kids every night for family dinners, everyone getting together for big birthday parties or reunions! That’s his dream life! Plus, in Snezhnaya, most families have more than two kids anyways
He will cry so hard when his babies are placed in his arms for the first time, I mean he’s a mess. Nose is running, eyes puffy, lost of sniffling lmao he is so excited to be a dad!! Don’t you dare tell the other Harbingers how much he cried...What do you mean you took a picture when he wasn’t looking??? Hey??!?!
With his obscene amount of mora, he’ll buy a huge house that will accommodate everyone. Anything you want will be purchased that day or within 48 hours, the same goes for the kids
But they’ll all learn to be thankful for what they have. They’ll learn to fight, fish and speak multiple languages. He has high expectations but let’s face it, he’ll be proud of them no matter what
You’re gonna have to be the one to put your foot down though because Ajax doesn’t enjoy being the ‘mean parent’, he has trouble saying no to the kiddos which can create some tension between you and your husband. He has good intentions of course!! He doesn’t wanna say no to those cute, freckled faces!!
Zhongli:
Zhongli is nervous about having kids because he’s immortal. So this will go one of two ways. 1. You have the baby and the baby ends up not being immortal (or you adopt a baby who is not immortal) Then he loses you both. OR 2. You have the baby and it inherits his immortality and becomes an adeptus. Now he and the baby will have to watch you die while they both life forever.
Either way...It hurts him to think about because he loves you!! He wants to have a family with you!! He wants to give you that perfect family life every human desires!! But he’s torn
You two will just have to figure it out.
Zhongli will be a strong, male figure for your kid(s) and he will instill that traditional kindness and respect into their behavior. ‘Please’ and ‘thank you’ always, always offer to help someone who needs it, do good deeds and you will feel accomplished, be the best you you can be, alway try your hardest because that’s all that matters
He will be sure that your kid(s) always feel loved ALWAYS. Zhongli will tell them stories, cook for them, take them to school, anything that needs to be done. When you’ve had a rough day, he’ll step in to take over for the night without being asked. He shows interest in everything your kid(s) like and he will do his damn best to display every piece of artwork they make or every pretty rock they find
He...will make a great dad :’)
Kaeya:
Ooooh brother, at first Kaeya says no he doesn’t want kids but...Then he starts thinking about it
He observes the happy families that walk around the cobblestone streets of Mondstadt, how the kiddos smile and laugh with their parents. He’ll patrol in the afternoons, usually rounding the corner just in time to see the city’s kids leave school for the day, watching as they all run down the street to go home to their parents or play in the fountain together...Yeah, that really warms his heart
He’d want one or two kids, preferably two to avoid an only child being lonely. He isn’t on the best terms with Diluc but he can admit that they had a great childhood together, playing at the winery and running around as brothers do
Kaeya would be a very patient, understanding father. He doesn’t have much of a temper so he’d use the kids’ mistakes as learning opportunities instead of getting upset at them
He would be obsessed with the kids when they’re babies though oh man if you thought you had baby fever, he has it times ten! He loves holding the baby, watching with a twinkling eye as his baby grasps his thumb with its tiny hand... adorable
And if your kids inherited his eyes, his star shaped pupils that his ancestors passed down to him...He’s gonna get emotional
Everyone at the knights’ headquarters and the Angel’s Share will get sick of him REALLY fast cause he won’t stop bragging about how cute and smart his kids are lmao
Diluc:
Diluc would be such a soft dad don’t even get me started
He loves you so much of course he wants to have kids with you! Is that even a question?? He won’t be the one to bring it up unless he gets the feeling that you want kids but once you ask, he’ll agree so fast
He’ll be grateful to even have one kid with you :’) and he’ll be fine with however many kids YOU want. You want one kid? Perfect! You want four? No problem, the manor is big enough for ten! You...you want ten...? Time to hire some more maids then lmao
Diluc is a worry wart though, he’ll be afraid to hold the baby, feed it, bathe it, he’s terrified of hurting the baby or the baby suddenly hating him. So just help him out!! Cause when he gets comfortable with the baby, he’ll be in full dad mode
He isn’t embarrassed to walk around the manor, conducting business with a baby strapped to his chest!
Diluc is a very kind, gentle dad who will always offer helpful solutions to the kiddos’ problems. He’ll make sure all of their needs are met while also trying to avoid spoiling them... Too much... There will be a fair amount of spoiling...
His own father wasn’t too affectionate with him so that’s why he’ll be affectionate with his kids! Hugs and kisses when he tucks them in at night, big dad hugs when they get home from school, holding their hands in the busy streets of Mondstadt. His father was a great dad! He just aims to be better.
Xiao:
Like Zhongli, he worries about the mortality thing. Since he’s an Adeptus, his kid will certainly be an Adeptus too if you have kids together.
He also worries that his kid(s) will hate him. His duty is to kill demons which means that rain or shine, holidays, special occasions, day or night he’s gotta be ready to go slaughter demonic beings. So he’ll inevitably miss out on important stages in the kiddos’ lives
And admittedly... He’ll be scared of his kids lmao
They’re screaming, crying, barfing, pooping, laughing, screaming again...He can’t predict their behavior. It’s unsettling. All of that goes away one night when you sit him down and place your sleeping baby in his arms. His eyes go wide...And he just watches. This tiny, little baby...Feels no fear for him. It’s comforted by his presence. He almost cries...ALMOST
He’s still pretty much the same Xiao we all know and love but now he has a kid. “Slaying demons is what I do...Hey, go back inside and finish your dinner. Yes, even your vegetables. I don’t care that you don’t like them-...Fine. Don’t tell your mother, bring them to me. I’ll eat them” cute :)
He’s a protective dad and husband, he’d never let anyone or anything harm his beloved family
Venti:
Venti....does not want kids. He thinks they’re cute! He likes the idea of kids but he knows he wouldn’t enjoy actually having kids
You two already have so much fun together!! You don’t need a kid!! You guys have dogs!! Dogs are like kids! But they’re more independent and they’re cuter!
He’ll feel bad if you want kids and he doesn’t, he really will! But it’ll be nearly impossible to convince him cause he’s made his mind up :/
Venti’ll make it up to you somehow though, he’ll take you out more and show you all of the adventures you guys can have if there aren’t kids around
But for the sake of fatherhood headcanons, let’s pretend he gave in. Venti would be a very caring dad. He would cuddle the hell out of this kiddo and sing to them :’) the only problem is that Venti doesn’t like being tethered to one place for too long so he tends to take off and not come back for a few days... :(
Albedo:
Albedo wants kids mostly just to see what fatherhood would be like. He’s always been curious about what that part of his life would be like so why not have a kid
He’d be good with one kid, two at most cause after practically raising Klee, he knows how some kids can be and...He doesn’t have the mental capacity for more than two kids at a time lmao
He tries his best to show more emotion in his face. We all know he usually sits like this 😐 and goes ‘wow im so happy right now’. If you didn’t know him, you’d think he was bored out of his mind right? So he’s gotta work on that. And when he musters up a smile for the baby and it smiles back at him????? Yeah...He’s gonna try to smile a lot more now
He definitely softens up once he becomes a dad, he shows emotion more than he used to and surprisingly, he takes time off of work. Shocker, I know! He decides that he’s been in the lab long enough and that he wants to be able to be there for these moments with you and his kid(s) :’) :’) He trusts Sucrose and Timaeus to take over for him for a couple hours
He keeps a journal for each kid and writes down the date and time they have their firsts or just interesting things they do ->
- 8/4: Baby sees and plays with a cat for the first time
- 9/5: Baby smacked me in the face and laughed so hard she threw up
-9/12: Baby learns that pulling my hair gets my attention. She now continues to do so
-10/15: Baby stays at Aunt Klee’s house for the first time
Baizhu:
Baizhu really loves kids, he works with them a lot and he considers Qiqi to be his daughter anyway but in terms of you guys having a kid together, with his condition he can probably only handle one kid running around
He will do his absolute best to be a good dad. Even if he feels like death, he’ll help change diapers, feed the baby, care for it when you need a break. He isn’t contagious so when you’re sleeping and he feels gross, he’ll sit back against the pillows with the baby on his chest, the three of you resting together (though he doesn’t fall asleep...that would be dangerous for the baby)
Baizhu already tends to nag at you about your health and lifestyle choices but now?? He’ll be a menace. He’ll be constantly evaluating your baby’s condition, checking to see if a certain food is giving them a rash or making sure their skin isn’t drying out. He’s hyper aware of your baby’s health and will be the one to treat them if they get sick
He’s a busy guy since he runs the pharmacy but he will always do his best to be present for your baby’s big milestones! And when your kid cries cause Baizhu’s medicine tastes like shit, he’ll do his best to not be disappointed in their reaction lmao
When you leave him alone with the baby, he’ll wrap a scarf around himself to tie the baby to his chest while he works and...he looks so cute :) dad baizhu <3 <3 <3 <3
Bonus points for him buying the baby toy medical equipment so he can get your kiddo interested in medicine :)
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totallyawr1t3r · 3 years ago
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Hi babe!! may i request yandere platonic Isabela, Luisa, Mirabel with an older sister (around 24-26) that overworks her self because her powers are really useful for the people in the village, that she doesn't get enough sleep, rest, free time.
Yes, because this idea makes me happy
Also sorry it's shitty, Im tired
【Platonic】Yandere Madrigal Sisters with an Overworked Older Sister:
You were Julieta's oldest daughter, only older then Isabela and Dolores by 4 years. Your gift was Cloning, and excellent [As your Abuela told you] gift to help out with the community. And she was right, you could make dozens of yourself and help out as many people as you needed.
It was all fine at first, you quiet enjoyed feeling useful to the community and plus the baby Isabela seemed to joy trying to guess which one was the real [Y/n]. But as you grew older, and as Abuela had started to place expectations on everyone, you had grown more over worked. Mostly because you didn't wanna have your siblings Burdened with the same expectations.
With Isabela, you took her place as Abuela's golden perfect child. You knew Abuela meant well but you didn't need Isabela to lose herself to having to be perfect all the time. You were completely fine with being just that.
With Luisa, while you couldn't exactly take all of her chores because you weren't strong enough. You still managed to take away a lot, despite having a limit of how many clones you could make before it started to affect you, you would make as many as needed to help move something so Luisa could rest.
And with Mirabel, you were glad she didn't have much to live up to. [That sounded too harsh-]
But anyways, your younger sisters cared a lot about you. At first, it was a normal feeling of protectiveness about you. Julieta and Agustín found it adorable how they would all fuss over you whenever you pushed yourself a bit too hard. But it slowly got a bit more Concerning as they all grew older.
You would start to make less time for them as your chores grew, and someone else needed another you. Though you did make a clone of yourself for them to have, it still wasn't the same as the real thing. So they would wait for you to come back home, only for you to come back way too late, and sleep for just an hour or two before you woke up again for chores.
And whenever they brought it up, you would just shrug it off and leave.
It wasn't until one day they made up a plan.
You were about to head off again, something about how someone needed about three of you to help unpack things while someone else needed four of you to help with farming.
But Casita refused to open the door, no matter how harded you tried. You mentally cursed at Casita, before you felt a vine wrap around your waist.
You were met witn a upset Isabela, with an equally upset Luisa and Mirabel behind her. You didn't know exactly why they were upset but you had a feeling it had to do with you. So, you nervously greeted them and had asked them if they could get Casita to open up.
They of course said no, and there wasn't any room to argue with them. It was three against one, and for some reason your gift wasn't working at the moment. It was odd but you couldn't question it as Isabela dragged you back to her room, with Luisa and Mirabel.
They had kidnapped you for sister bonding moment.
It was pretty nice but you knew you couldn't stay for long. Abuela wouldn't like it. So you tried to escape Luisa's grasp but she wouldn't budge. You laughed it off, until you noticed something off about each of them. Something you've been ignoring for a while.
When you suddenly turned more serious, asking Luisa to let you go. They all said no, and Mirabel had started to say a few creepy things.
The next few moments were a blur for you as you found yourself trapped inside one of their rooms. You tried to call for Agustín or Julieta, or someone else. Dolores should have heard you, but no one came to help.
Look on the bright side at else, you get to relax and hang out with your three awesome sisters! What more could ya want.
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hanniiesuckle17 · 2 years ago
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Chapter 6: Sunbae
A/n: I am so fucking sorry that I haven’t updated guys!!! This has been the craziest three weeks so far and I just didn’t want to give you all something half assed. Also I apologize for any spelling mistakes im pretty sure it was my phones autocorrect cause i wrote 90%of this over four days on my phone at 3 am or at work in a corner. But um anyway how are you guyyyyysssss? Tag List is Open <3
Tag List: @mini-meanhoe​​​ @leggomylino @hanstagram​​​ @desertofdessert @hoes4hoseok​​​ @jeonqqin​​ @mrsunshine999​ @jisungsjheekies​ @hannie-squirrel00​​​​ @cotccotc​​​​ @yangs-jeongin​​​​ @binniebutter​​​​ @orangegyu​​​​ @little-precious-baby​​​​ @raethethey​​​​ @sofie296​​​​ @love-letters-2-jisungie​​​​ @bluejayboys​​​​
SMIY Tag List: @sanccharine​ @txt-yaomi​ @lyramundana​​​​​​
Pairing: Jeong Yunho x Reader    
Word Count: 2.4k
Genre: Series, Fluff, Angst, Comedy, Idol au, Secret Relationship
Updates: Saturday 9 AM CDT (Hopefully)
Warnings: Cursing, Privacy Invasion, Dieting, Overworking, 18+Themes (eventually)
Summary: Privacy. Normalcy. Love. Y/n was ready to give all of that up when she became an idol. She was more than happy with the absence of those qualities in her life until a certain six foot mountain of sunshine and chaos was cast opposite her in her first drama. Confronted with the fact that she no longer knows what she wants; Y/n must decide if he’s truly worth giving up the life she’s dreamed of…and how much damage she’ll let happen before she makes a decision.
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Third POV
The cool morning air greeted the young idol as she stepped out of the van. The sky was just beginning to lighten and she could feel the morning mist floating around her. She embraced the calming feeling with a smile, feeling absolutely content in this moment.
“Y/n! Come on! Roll call in fifteen.” The cheery voice of her manager Jae Bong called out. The man in his early thirties was already halfway to the door.
Adjusting her coat the debuting actress shuffled after him and into the sound stage. Inside was vastly different than the serene atmosphere she had just come from.
On the other side of set, Yunho could hardly contain himself. His manager was half asleep beside him doing his best to keep his eyes open. The idol had insisted on getting to set two hours before his call time just in case his counterpart did the same.
His eyes darted around the room with an excited grin. Even though he stood at six feet he still pushed himself onto his tippy toes to see over the far reaches of the busy sound stage.
“Hyung- what time is it again?”
“Two minutes later than the last time you asked me?”
“Two minutes later than the last time you asked me?”
Nervously, Yunho smoothed out non-existent wrinkles in his clothes. Though he knew at an early morning rehearsal everyone- including the cast- would be in sweatpants and sneakers, he wanted to look his best to make up for his first impression…..and his second impression as well.
Even in ripped jeans and a button-down, Yunho was still overdressed compared to the rest of the cast and staff. He didn’t care. There was nothing that could calm his excitement until he was standing next to Y/n and working their scene.
“Five minutes to places!! Five minutes!” One of the staff called out into the chasm-like room. A scattered chorus of “Thank you, five!” Could be heard in response.
“Oh my god! Hyung! Five minutes!!” Yunho excitedly cheered- practically jumping up and down.
“Ouch- Yunho! Stop shaking my arm!”
The tall man’s ears pricked up as a door was opened across the room. He looked at the figure walking out onto the floor in adoration. An unbelievable air of confidence surrounded her. He could only describe what he was feeling like something out of a corny kids’ sitcom. Her hair was billowing behind her confident stride; a pink glowing halo floated around her face. Everything moved in slow motion. As she walked and staff handed off papers and items it felt like his heart was closer to bursting with each step she took towards him in the center of the room.
With no control over his body, Yunho’s hand reached up and grasped at his chest as if his hand could possibly keep his heart from flying out of his body. It took the idol a few moments to realize Y/n had actually come and stood beside him. In reality “beside him” meant “about 5 feet away with two staff members in between”, but Yunho was excited either way.
Y/n looked over at him briefly only to look again when she saw his eyes trained on her already. It was a new feeling having to tilt her head slightly to meet someone's gaze. Unsure what to do with him staring at her Y/n decided to greet him as a sunbae and bowed before softly saying hello.
All Yunho could muster in response was a tiny wave, which she didn’t see. He sighed and gently thumped his fist against his palm looking around the stage. How was he going to start a conversation and not look like an idiot this time?
“Are you nervous about working through the stunt today?” A gentle voice asked, pulling his attention back to where it should have been.
He turned- a little wide-eyed- trying to figure out who spoke to him. Y/n was flipping through the script, eyes trained on the paper. The only clue that it was her that spoke was the tiny glance she gave him before handing the script back to a man whose height almost paralleled Yunho’s. “Uhh….”
“I know you did a lot of your stunt work for Imitation but I can see how this one is nerve-wracking. Especially since I’m the one driving the cycle.” She still did not look at him as she spoke. Instead, her eyes were focused on the man (most likely her manager with how attentive he was being) handing her knee pads.
Yunho was entranced as he watched her delicate fingers wrap the pads over her loose sweatpants and secure them in place. “Well I mean I wouldn’t say I’m nervous but- wait you’re doing the stunt yourself?!”
She shrugged as if it was no big deal. “Yeah! It sounded like a lot of fun so I convinced my manager to let me train on the bike.” Yunho’s eyes darted from the girl to the black motorcycle parked about 40ft away on the stage.
“Wow, that’s….”
“Crazy? Yeah. Soojin-my leader- was kinda mad when she found out.” A breathy laugh came out as she spoke. The edge of her eyes folded in a smile. “She said I was crazy.”
“Actually….I think it’s really cool. You’ve probably got more balls than I do.”
For a moment Y/n just stared at him. Yunho then processed what he just said and his eyes turned to saucers. All he wanted to do was just slowly disappear from existence. Suddenly a laugh erupted from the girl. The idol’s shoulders visibly relaxed seeing her unbothered and laughing at his thoughtless joke.
She opened her mouth as if to speak again but a voice over a loudspeaker interrupted her. “Places actors! Dry rub through w/ stunt marking- Scene 41!”
The two parted ways and Yunho looked over his shoulder as Y/n walked away towards the black motorbike. Someone handed him a backpack and canvas tube before pushing him onto his marker.
“Cameras rolling! Mark the stunt! Action!”
Y/n switched on the ignition and felt the engine coke to life under her seat. With the stunt coordinator moving beside her she drove forward watching Yunho walk his instructed path twisting past an approaching student. As he turned the corner, the coordinator queued the actress who did a soft but sharp turn to stop the bike.
Yunho’s manager shook his head and hid his face in his palm as he watched the idol dramatically fall before the bike stopped six feet from him.
The director called cut before turning to look at the footage. “Okay everybody looks good! Camera test number two! Stunt and scene run full speed! Mark!”
Everyone returned to the full mark. Y/n could feel the adrenaline beginning to spread and she could not wait to start. Across the way, she looked at Yunho who was jumping up and down nervously. It was almost cute seeing him shake out his nerves. Their eyes met for a moment and Yunho felt an equal amount of adrenaline rush through his body.
The girl gave him a thumbs up as if to ask him if he was ready. He nodded and returned the gesture. She flipped down the visor of the helmet and waited for the director to call “action”. Anxiously she fiddled and adjusted the gloves on her hands as she stared down the director.
Jae Bong stood a few feet behind the director’s team nervously biting his nails. “Okay! We’re good! Action!”
Y/n switched on the ignition after seeing Yunho begin to run forward. She knew that she would be faster than he was so as soon as she saw him round the corner she pushed forward on the bike.
Yunho twisted to avoid a student and just like in all her practices Y/n turned the bike so harshly that it was almost a drift to avoid the tall man barreling towards her. His head turned just in time to see Y/n go parallel to the ground right in her mark and Yunho fell backward with the wheel spinning only a couple feet away from his face.
In awe he stared at the girl beneath the helmet, his heart hammering in his chest. She pushed herself off the ground before tossing her helmet in anger. Channeling her character, Han Nari’s, emotions, Y/n sent a chilling glare at the man on the floor.
“Son of a bitch!” She screamed furiously looking between the man and the package that used to be attached to the bike now crushed from the fall. “What were you thinking!? What a psychopath! Can’t you watch where you’re going?”
All Yunho could do was stare at Y/n and attempt to stutter out a response. Thankfully that’s exactly what he was supposed to do. Y/n turned away from him and angrily looked around. The boy on the ground continued to watch her in awe as she picked up the package and judged its condition with a frustrated expression.
“How can I deliver this now… it’s destroyed…” Her eyes turned towards him again. “Are you going to compensate for this? I can’t give a customer a broken package.”
His mouth was still slightly agape and wonderment filled his face. She rolled her eyes before coming over and kicking his leg. “Are you even listening? You’re really just going to stare at me like a dead fish?”
Yunho quickly closed his mouth and shot up off the ground. Even as he rose she maintained character and was unfazed at his towering stature. “I…um…I am so sorry!” He bowed deeply before trying to rush to pick up the package she dropped and attempting to upright the vehicle. He struggled for a moment before Y/n pushed him aside.
“Move,”
As if the bike weighed relatively nothing she lift it up and pushed out the kickstand. “Woah…”
Noticing something near her foot, the girl bent down and picked up the long leather tube. “Is this yours Fish Boy?”
“Oh…yes- that’s mine..” Yunho graciously took it from her hands and loosely held it against his chest. “I feel bad for causing the accident. Here, would this be enough to cover the damage?” He pulled a few bills out of his pocket and Y/n only looked between the paper and his eyes.
“Wow, Fish Boy, I didn’t think you’d actually compensate.” She took the money, stuffing it in her back pocket.
“What’s your name?” He asked seeing the girl throw her leg over the bike.
She sighed, reaching down and grabbing her helmet from the ground. “If you’d like to file a report you can contact Song Speedy Delivery.”
“No-that’s not it at all-“ The bike roared to life and Y/n cheekily smiled as she revved the engine over his words.
“Then let’s hope we don’t meet again Fish Boy. I’ll be going now,” Yunho watched as she pushed forward and rode away from camera view. Yunho watched as she took off the helmet and shook out her hair.
“That’s great! Wonderful! Great first run!” The director cheered, cutting the cameras. “Let’s run through it a couple more times then break for lunch and we’ll keep working!”
The idol was a little surprised to see Y/n walking towards him, a bottle of water in hand. “That went pretty well. Are you okay? Do you want me to stop sooner on the stunt, Sunbae?” She handed him the bottle with a small smile.
“No, not at all! I trust you! You could even get closer….if you want…” She nodded brows furrowed in thought. “On the bike! I meant closer on the bike.”
“Yeah, I get it! That was honestly so much fun! I’m so excited for the rest of the drama! You were really great in the scene, Sunbae. You nailed Jaeyoung’s whole love at first sight thing!”
Yunho nodded. He could do nothing to contain the wide grin on his face seeing the girl so happy and excited. “You know…um….Y/n…” he scratched the back of his neck and cautiously looked around at the staff resetting everything for the next run-through. “You aren’t that much younger than I am…and uh…well…you- you don’t have to call me Sunbae.”
She blinked a few times before looking around at the staff herself. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah! I’d be much more comfortable if I were just….Yunho, to you at least. Formalities are stupid anyway.” He said with a nervous laugh.
The girl twisted her feet around, getting used to the new atmosphere between the two. “Sounds great… Yunho.”
It was the hardest thing Yunho ever had to do in his entire adult life not to physically jump around and do cartwheels hearing his name in her beautiful voice. “Yeah-“ he said barely fending off a grin “Sounds great!”
“Places! Second run through scene 41!”
Y/n waved at the tall boy before walking back over to her starting position. She couldn’t help but smile at the little interaction that had just occurred. Jaebong rushed up to her and handed her a bottle of water before adjusting her knee pads. She had to eventually swat away his cautious nitpicking.
Yunho practically ran up to his manager with the most ecstatic look on his face. “Hyung! I don’t care what you have to do- please, PLEASE, get me Y/n’s number! I’ve never asked you for anything, please, please, please, please, pleeeeaaaseee. Just the phone number!”
His manager let himself be shaken by the six-foot man as he pleaded and pleaded. “Fine, okay! I’ll get the number! Now get ready- they are about to start again.”
Yunho cheered before gently patting his hyung’s shoulder. “Thank you so very much.” Like nothing had just happened, the idol calmly walked off to his mark and waited for the director to queue the scene with a huge dopey grin on his face.
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