#anyway im gonna rotate these two around in my brain for a few hours <3

[anachronistic-falsehood]

UPSET THAT I CANNOT REPLY TO A POST WITH AN IMAGE. I AM SITTING HERE LIKE THIS THINKING ABOUT VASH/CPHIL PARALLELS:

IM GONNA REPLY TO THIS WITH MY CPHIL/VASH COMPARISON ANALYSIS. BECAUSE THE BRAINROT HAS SET IN AND IT'S KILLING ME.

OK OK ALRIGHT. OK. so first of all. cphil and vash the stampede. angel imagery. lost their best friend. lost their family. lost their home. extreme family issues. vash has a missing arm and phil has a wrecked wing. vash can't use his powers at the end of trimax and phil can't fly anymore. crying. ok so now we've got these fuckin parallels right. ok i'm gonna get into their classpects because they are so similar but so different. this is gonna b under a cut this got away from me i'm so sorry i could talk classpects for HOURSSSSSS

so cPhil to me is a Seer of Life, right? Seers are supposed to guide their fellow players on the right path. cPhil TRIES to do that. right. like he TRIES. but god he is so bad at it. he's so disconnected from mortals in general that he just doesn't know how they work. he thinks they're all doing things wrong and they just need some guidance to do it right!!! and Vash is a Muse of Life to me. lots of parallels here between him and Calliope (seen in this post where i delve into Vash and Knives' classpects).

They're both Life players with the same goals, but with vastly different ways they go about achieving those goals. they just want peace for everyone else, but god they are both so fucking bad at it. they are at opposite ends of a morality scale here. Vash's main focus is keeping people alive and it doesn't matter what he has to do to keep it that way, no matter what happens to himself or whether keeping one guy alive will indirectly result in the deaths of others. Phil's main focus is establishing peace, and he doesn't care what he has to destroy in the meantime to do that, as long as it doesn't harm himself or the people he's close to. To Vash, the ends justify the means. He can sacrifice his own wellbeing to keep others safe as long as no one else gets hurt while he's there. To Phil, the method of getting to his goal matters just as much, because instead of looking at it as just "the ends justify the means" he sees it as "everything i do pushes myself towards achieving what i want, my goal will never be reached without these actions so i might as well do what i want and maybe the destruction will teach everyone a lesson along the way" LIKE HE'S SO FUCKED UP <3

cPhil is so derse dreamer and Vash is so prospit dreamer. THAT'S the big difference!!! they see their actions very differently and that's partially why they act so differently when they have the same goals. Lunar sways are difficult to analyze because there's so much nuance to them, you could have a lot of Prospit traits but have one extremely different trait that could make you a Derse dreamer instead. like it's so weird??? but I once saw a post that summarized it like this: For Prospit dreamers, the end result is more important than the methods it takes to get there; for Derse dreamers, the journey is just as, if not more important, than the end result. Phil HAS to be a Derse dreamer, bc to him his journey is neverending. He's an immortal who has been alive long enough to know that not everyone will see his logic, and he will spend the rest of his life either convincing them to see his ways or he will get rid of those people entirely. To Vash, if he can just convince enough people, if he can just get to others before the destruction occurs, if he can TALK to enough people, maybe the violence will stop one day. It's an IMPOSSIBLE goal, but he keeps trying to look towards that one day where he'll be able to look out at a paradise without death and violence (much like Callie in a lot of ways BUT I'VE ALREADY GONE OVER THAT!!!).

Phil, as a combination Seer and Derse dreamer, knows that the journey is neverending, and he's either given up on pacifism or never tried it in the first place. He SEES that his ideals are not universal, and that knowledge gives him the ability to be apathetic towards other people and destroy what they love to "teach them a lesson." Vash, as a young spry century-and-a-half years old, and as a Muse and Prospit dreamer, still thinks that he can reach his goal of world peace, even though that hopes fades more and more from day to day, but like. his speech near the end of tristamp ep 12 to Knives?? About how he'll just keep going no matter what??? He's not giving up on his ideology because he doesn't SEE. He doesn't KNOWWW that his ideals cannot be universal. Ofc this changes later on in Trimax and he finally takes direct action by killing Legato and gives up on his staunch pacifism, but like. my guy. it took you a LONG ASS TIME to get to this point. my god.

Life players are described as "concerned with the betterment of themselves and those around them, as well as the onward march of positive progress... They also have the tendency to put other's needs before their own, which never ends well for anyone, because the Life-bound can grow bitter if they feel their own self-care has had to be shunted aside. At their best, they are great listeners, caretakers, and nurturers. At their worst, the Life-bound are passive aggressive, and pushy-they're certain they know best.” Both cPhil and Vash are the best and worst of their aspect. They both grow bitter, Vash in Trimax from having to take the high road all the time, and Phil from thinking that no one can see that he knows best. They do listen, and they do care for and nurture others, and they work towards the betterment of others, but sometimes it's people who don't want to be nurtured or bettered. Vash tries to help people who don't want help, and Phil babies cWilbur when he comes back and his "help" towards cTommy is um. not great!! They can both be passive aggressive, and they're both so incredibly sure that they know best. They're both so incredibly stuck in their ways.

Phil is the most stubborn Seer ever, because he only wants to see what will benefit his own life and ideals, not everyone. And Vash, the Muse, keeps on his one-track thought process and resigns himself to doing what he's always done (much like Callie) instead of taking direct action to TRULY change others' lives for the better. They both do finally change this in the very end of their arcs, with Phil reaching out to Niki and retreating to the End with her, Connor, and Kristin, giving up his old lifestyle to help a couple of people he's only known for a couple years and genuinely cared about for much less, basically a blink in his immortal lifespan, and Vash killing Legato to save Livio and Razlo and confronting Knives head on to save the planet.

but like. FUCK, you guys took so long to get just to this point. you are so stuck in your ways you have PROBLEMS

[halorocks1214]

Hey, could I request more of that ‘Alan has cancer’ fic please? With Scott looking after Alan when he’s not feeling well, like a really tender moment?

sure! i hope you dont mind me nabbing prompt number 4. “Please stay with me.” for this. its based on the number in your URL :] (i would have also grabbed 7 for fun but theres no way im fitting that sentence in lol)

ill be accepting prompts until tomorrow morning, so get them submitted within the next 7 ish hours if you haven't yet and want to! the prompts are pinned at the top of my blog <3 (im going to bed snnnzzzz)

cw for mentions of cancer/cancer symptoms as well as chemotherapy

technical first part to this story but you don't have to read to understand

Scott vividly remembered a memory of both John and Virgil banning him from the kitchen. They already had Grandma to start fires for them, they don't need Scott helping.

But even they would have to be willing to forgive him for dabbling with their janky pancake maker considering the circumstances.

"It's started," Virgil plainly stated while standing on the other side of Scott's desk.

The brunet could only look up confused, the paper he was reading previously loosely gripped in his hand with one of his favorite pens in the other, "What started?"

Virgil sighed, but not at Scott, just at the situation in general, "I was helping Alan get ready this morning and started brushing his hair. I got about four brushes in before a clump of hair fell out."

Well, what great news to start the day off with.

"Jesus," Scott could only lightly slam the paper and pen he was holding down onto the table to push his wrists into his eyes. "Jesus Christ."

They were all expecting it to happen sooner rather than later, still didn't suck any less.

Virgil walked around to place a gentle hand on his brother's shoulder, rhythmic with his comforting rubs as much as possible, "Yep."

Scott left a hand on the side of his face as he looked out over their house with a shake of his head, staring off into space as a million thoughts raced behind his eyes, "God, why Alan out of all people, out of us? What has he done in his life to deserve this?"

Virgil shrugged his shoulders, swallowing the spit in his mouth as he proceeded to look out over the room just like Scott, "Nothing, absolutely nothing, which is why cancer sucks so much. People who get it never deserve all the pain it brings with it."

John mentioned something about eating lots of healthy things during treatment, didn't he?

Scott grabbed a cup from one of the cabinets before heading over to the fridge. Filling the plastic container to the top with some grapes, pineapple, and carrots (Alan's favorites), Scott went back to the tray to place it on there and leaned away a little bit to make sure everything on it looked presentable.

A few pancakes, a cup of juice, utensils, and now a cup of fruits and veggies.

Scott sighed while carefully grabbing the edges of the whole thing, hoping it would be enough (would anything be enough right now?).

Making his way to Alan's room quietly, he used one of his feet to prod the door open to the kid's room, leaning over the tray in his hands to peek inside. With the sun rising over the horizon and peering in from the window, the room was lit up just enough to make Alan's outline on the bed, IV and all.

For the most part, patients tended to receive their treatment in a clinic or hospital, but occasionally, with the help of an on-site nurse, chemotherapy can be given at a person's own home. With both Brains' and Virgil's expertise, it wasn't that hard convincing the staff to release Alan and to let him stay with his own family.

They weren't dumb with it, and anything they were even slightly unsure about involved inviting a private doctor to the island to help them out, but for the most part, they knew the best thing they could do for the kid was letting him be in a familiar environment he felt safe at.

With a soft 'click', the door was pushed back shut with the same foot he used to open it. Scott took a deep breath, "Alan?"

He thought he would need to speak again before the youngest finally stirred and rotated himself around to look at the door. Once he noticed who was in his room and what that person was carrying, he sat up on his hands and knees with an ear-to-ear grin, "Scott!"

Scott was sure to hide the way he wanted to grimace at how Alan sounded, "Hey Allie, I got something for ya."

Walking over to the bed, Scott leaned down to place the food on Alan's lap, grinning at how happy the smile on his face was. Sitting down on the edge of the covers, Scott crossed his arms as he stayed to make sure nothing went wrong.

Ignoring how Alan's hand trembled while holding the fork, Scott watched Alan take a bite of pancake. He hummed around the utensil in his mouth, words mumbled as he spoke with food in his mouth, "Wow, this is great! Did Virgil make this?"

Scott laughed, though it had a hint of unsureness behind it, "Um, thank you, but no, I made it."

Alan moved to munch on some grapes as he absorbed the words, "But John said you weren't allowed to use the kitchen any more?"

Dirty snitches the lot of his brothers were, sometimes. With a fond sigh, Scott reached forward and ruffled Alan's hair the softest he ever had, "Well, he can take it up with me later if it bothers him so much."

Alan giggled before continuing on and finishing the breakfast Scott made for him. Nothing else needed to be said, everything the two of them needed could be achieved by just being in each other's presence. It almost felt like an eternity, with how slowly Alan was eating, but eternity was exactly how much time Scott had for his brothers anyway.

Setting the fork down, Alan leaned back with a blissed-out sigh, "That hit the spot. Thanks again Scooter."

Scott nodded, "Of course, it was my pleasure."

The brunet stood up and stretched his arms above his head to get the knots out of his back. Before he could fully reach down to grab the tray for when he left the room, Alan shot forward and wrapped his hand around his older brother's wrist.

The grip laughably weak, yet it still tugged on Scott's heart all the same. Despite it all, Alan still had the ability to whip out an absolutely stellar pair of puppy-dog eyes, "Please stay with me."

Scott had a lot to do today. He had to sign a bunch of papers, make a few phone calls, and he still wasn't sure whether or not he needed to go to the mainland for an in-person meeting. Still, "Sure thing, bub."

As gently as he could, Scott lowered himself back onto the bed next to Alan, grabbing the now-free-of-food tray and setting it onto the table next to them. Worming his way closer to the headboard to be more comfortable, Scott had all of two seconds before Alan's head was on his shoulder and the kid's arms were wrapped around his right one.

With a fond sigh, Scott pulled out his phone, content with the idea that he'd probably be hunkering down for a while. After a few rings, he held it horizontal as John's hologram appeared before him.

He spoke quietly, "Hey John, do you mind rescheduling anything I have for today for later in the week? Something came up, I'm gonna be kind of busy."

Noticing the tuft of blond in the corner of Scott's hologram, John didn't need to be told twice, "Sure thing, Scott."

[kyunsies]

Hello Mädch ahsdjaksdh <3 !!

how is college going? dw, I hope you are settling in super well and feeling optimistic about school and all the amazing things I know you are going to achieve this year! I am excited that you are starting your rotations now! you are going to do awesome, I know it! I'm sorry that you didn't get that ICU first like you wanted but hopefully it's all part of the plan so that you get it at the right time for you <3 let me know how they go, of course. I hope they go super well.

the week has been a bit weird to be honest, in my team I had a semi argument that was properly tense for the first time with someone and it was just so unpleasant. you know those people where they aren't horrible but you know that you'll never completely see eye to eye with them? i think it's just one of those things, where we'll never just completely read each other or get each other? and it's not, like, a massive issue or anything that we can't deal with, but I feel like usually I get on really well with people or not at all (all or nothing person I guess haha) but with this person I've just got to admit that we're always going to be a bit in the middle? like, we talked it over, and I've still found sometimes we misunderstand one another? so things are still good in work and clients, but with workpeople it has been the more difficult battle? hopefully we should get some more cool media stuff with the K-pop people soon, so that's an up?

OMGsh your coworkers are so much older than you! [lease do post a picture of your room, I am 100% confident that you have made it so dreamy and pretty. Thank you sm for telling me more about these operations though! I feel like everywhere is on red alert at the moment when it comes to health and care and making sure that people look after themselves and not put others at risk, you know? the doctors that to talk to me about my potential surgeries too have said the same but it's nice hearing it from a friend, you know? so thank youuuu <3 <3

I was the same as you, I would get so so so anxious and stressed if I wasn't studying or working or anything like that? but my mum is like your mum and grandma, where she gets up early too! but I feel like I need to do the late night thing instead? but then once I got into this crazy spiral where I would wake up really early and go to bed really late and like nap in between so I ended up like having two hours of sleep either side? that was peak wth at the time haha XD so now I try and let myself wake up a bit later really XD ha ha I'm in barely adulting! like I work so much but I don't earn a lot ha ha – I don't think that's very effective adulting? or like, I don't know I guess for a lot of people my age there's a work hard and hope it pays off thing in certain industries? so you're definitely more effectively adulting than me right now! like, you're going to do stuff that's gonna actively help people and you'll see that right in front of you, you know!!? sometimes my work gets out there but I rarely see directly if it gets to make peoples lives better you know? so the path you're on is so so admirable <3 <3 <3

I get you though, do you find that you thrive under the pressure even though it's sometimes a lot? I find that sometimes it does help me, but sometimes I forget to identify the times when it isn't helping me? or, sometimes I take it too far? so please look out for yourself and take care of yourself <3 and when you're worried if you're on the edge know that it's enough for you to take a rest and not be super perfect. i sometimes tell myself to except that I'm probably gonna make two or three stupid mistakes a day? It sounds kind of silly but it means that it makes it easier for me to accept when I mess up, idk, I think it helps me balance the pressure sometimes? i 100% understand what you're saying - at school do they have people that can directly help? or like peer supporters so it's not as stressful or official feeling as a therapist? if you ever want me to come off anon to help lemme know <3 i'm always here for you <3

oh my gosh your grandparents have been able to live long too! all my grandparents lived close to 100 before passing, and one of my grandmothers had the same as your grandfather. he sounds so sweet and so kind though! i love that he knows how to FaceTime you! Some of my aunts and uncles still don't properly haha. it sounds like he knows that he's super loved though, he's very lucky <3 <3 i've been thinking about all this really lovely stuff and how it grounds you when stuff like careers can stress you out and feel like the most important thing when it shouldn't be? what are the personality differences between the different areas of the US? my East Coast friends seem to straight talk a lot more than my West Coast friends? like they're a lot more realistic as opposed to being, I don't know laid-back or if not laid-back sometimes just more comfortable with superficial stuff? Not like my West Coast friends are superficial people, but I think they accept it as part of the world a bit better? my friends on the east coast will rail against that stuff a lot more, like they buy into the influencer bullshit less? but I guess these are all sweeping generalisations anyway... I might have to travel a bit in europe soon... I got asked to go to otaly for some work today, and to holland next month. Idk if it will end up happening though, things change all the time? I have to keep checking quarantine rules all the time with countries! but YAY and YES Europe tour trip one day :D !!!!!!!

you know what? when I first saw you compare bowling and golf I was like, wait, what? but now I totally get it! i know a golfer and they talk about how physical and strenuous it is on the arms and stuff all the time which I don't think always comes across when you watch it and it makes a lot of sense with how you describe how you trained for bowling! i used to cox in rowing and I always used to find it really funny that I said that was the sport I did because honestly I just sat in the boat all the time and steered XD

obligatory YES WTF ARE COTTON SCENTS! quite a few shops in the city where I live have been closing down because of Covid but our Jo Malone is still going strong! I love that lots of already classic clothing shops have now gone out of business but for some reason the people where I live cannot live without their perfume XD I think I'm gonna go in later this week or next week to take a look! with all this travelling I kind of want to buy something new? also, my hands have been acting up with injury so I have to rest my hands more anyway – so might as well look for perfume right? do you have any recommendations or would the blueberry one you've just gotten be at the top of your list?

the exciting thing is that I'm doing a bit less this week! I need to wait and see if that job wants me to fly out to Italy within the next 48 hours, if not next week, but if not I think I'm gonna figure out how to rehabilitate my joints a bit and get my brain okay? It's been existential Covid crisis week haha - I think a lot of me and my friends have been feeling like we've lost so much of our lives and potential during this time and I've really tried to hold in and ignore it for the past 18 months? i'm not one to ever feel lonely or to really really want to be in a relationship like some of my friends, but I've just been feeling it this week? like, I love my independence, but I wouldn't say no to a boyfriend right now you know? I feel silly saying that sometimes because I'm so against feeling like you have to have someone in your life to be okay, but I guess that's just a result of how the world is has been recently?? but I think all my feelings exploded around this stuff now so, I am trying to get back into a better place? so it's not as exciting as some of the stuff I've told you about before, but it's what's up I guess?

how are your mum and grandmother doing? are they doing good? [lease send all my love to them too. I'm glad these help you reflect on your week! they do with me too and I'm always happy to hear from you, no matter how long you might need <3 <3 hope you manage to reward yourself for working so hard these past days and that you remember you're always doing 110% so you deserve the best!

love you lots and lots - 💥

ANGEL HELLO !!!!!!!!! i told myself i would stay on top of this and swear in a timely manner but ;_____; a full week + 2 clinical rotations later here i am on a sunday, it seems this is always the case :( maybe my get back to you day will only be on sundays LOL i will try my best in the future babe, but ofc thank you so much for being patient with me <3

uni is going fine so far hun !!!! i've started clinical rotations as i've said on thursday and friday, and then my first exam is on tuesday so i read some chapters yesterday so i'm not squished for time lol :) and ,,,, what you said "hope it's all part of the plan" is very much my way of thinking lol wha is your sign? i'm a sagittarius and that's like, a philosophy i go by like everything is how it's supposed to be even if it's not what u want like everything will work itself out :') i'm wondering if we are one in the same !!!!! <3

and omg ;_____; conflict within the workplace is NEVER easy bc all everyone wants is to reach the goal you all are reaching and bc there's some bumps in the road it makes everything that much more stressful :( and i know exactly the type of person you are talking about LOL i've had to work with some of my peers in the hospital who really didn't treat me all that nicely , but i still have to partner up with them anyways bc we had to move a patient lol ; like they never do anything terrible to you but you just cannot come to a proper agreement with them? i know the feeling :( but i can tell you are doing ur absolute best ;_____; it's a tough situation ,,,,,,,,, but may i propose something ??? maybe since things are high stress in the workplace, would u be willing to meet them outside the workplace, like a quick coffee meet up and then discuss those issues? maybe talking about it in the work environment is way too stressful for both of u and it is hard to come to an agreement, but maybe in a calmer, more informal setting do u think maybe the both of u could be like "hey, what u were talking about i'm not really head over heels for but this is what i think and do u think we can do something where both of us will be happy?" im thinking maybe will opening up a means for more civilized discussion?? just a thought LOL :') let me know how it goes :( i hope u are all able to figure everything out !!!!!

about the surgeries !!!!! like i said i know it's super stressful to think about bc this is one of the very few times in life where things are absolutely out of our control and that scares us, and we as medical providers aren't supposed to give u a false sense of security, but i promise u everything will be just fine as long as u correctly follow up with care post-op :) we wouldn't want an infection !!!! >;( i remember last year i had a patient and she was going in for a routine colonoscopy and she was scared shitless ,,,,,,, but i was like "listen ma'am i know it can seem scary but i was just in there with the doctors and everything is super relaxed and they know what they're doing in there, you'll be out in no time and i'll be here waiting !!" and that seemed to help her a lot, after the surgery she was on me like flies on shit LOL she was like "THANK U HONEY" (but i think most of it was bc she was still drugged up hhh)

LOL us with our family members waking up early <3 literally this morning i decided to do my laundry at 8am (its only 10 right right now lol) but idk it just make u feel a little bit better doesn't it? but oh my gosh no i don't see u in this way at all ;_____; babe like you're already THERE in the world working and to me like ,,,,,, being an effective functioning person in society is like all i ever want i just want to be COMPETENT and the fact that u manage ppl ???? it's already a lot of responsibility but you do it everyday like you go to work u make food for yourself u pay bills like yes this all kinda sucks but you're there doing it and idk ,,,,,,,, like u being in this position is like yeah their surviving in the world and doing okay !!!! so that’s how i see u hun ;_____;

and i don’t think i necessarily thrive under pressure but i just kinda ,,,,,,, handle it?? like i think i handle my stress quite well !!! i think the reason why making mistakes scares me so much in my field is bc if i make a mistake i can like, kill someone or seriously harm them if i do something wrong SLKDFJ but i have to remember i’m still just a student and a lot of the things that i’ll learn won’t even be in these last few months of nursing school, but rather during my months of orientation on the floor i’ll be working on when i finally land a job ,,,,,, i know i just have to be patient and kind to myself, but it’s hard not having these high expectations for myself bc everyone else pushes themselves super hard (nurses i mean) so i feel like i should be too , ya know? ;_____; it’s a hard balance that i’ve yet to find but hopefully once i graduate i’ll have just a little bit more confidence in myself :’)

and omg your grandparents lived a long life as well !!!!!!!! a lot of my friends’ grandparents are really young still, so it’s hard for others to relate i think LOL but :(((( i’m really lucky to have them around still and like, i feel like my grandparents are the cornerstone of our whole entire family; once they pass i’m not quite sure what will happen ;_____; so i’m just trying to cherish every moment that i have with them even tho sometimes it’s stressful lol ; also BOUT THE DIFFERENCES FROM EAST TO WEST COAST LOL ; i think u described it really well actually :) like among the friends u have the are from different parts of the states, it’s very accurate in my opinion !! and again after all it is just a very broad assumption, in general east coasters have this “workaholic” attitude, they tend to be very realistic which i actually appreciate a lot lol, i’m hoping to live near the east coast when i move out <3 now where i am from it is considered the midwest even tho it’s more east than west if u look at it on the map LMAO and like, it’s really funny bc if u say to someone you’re from the midwest they’ll tell u our reputation is being “too nice” LSKDLFJSKLD and like that’s our thing, a happy medium between coasts with big cities but small towns too and generally just very chill and nice ,,,,,,,, the south of the US is also known for having that “southern hospitality” overall very cheerful ppl with personality and super kind attitude on life :) now the west of the US i’m not saying there aren’t nice ppl out there bc there are LOL but esp near lost angeles or hollywood ofc you’re going to have ppl very stuck up bc ya know they made it to big bad LA and they want to be trendy with all of the fake health shit (celery juice does NOTHING FOR U sorry lol) generally my view of the west is just very fake and i would never want to have my family grow up there LMAO but that generally like, california and washington but like, utah or wyoming or colorado are just absolutely gorgeous and they have small town ppl there bc there are a lot of ranches there ,,,,,,,, does any of this make sense to u ??? KLASFJ 

i’m going to skip a few paragraphs bc this is so long already LMAO but trust me i’ve read everything so far lol ; it seems like you’re doing a lot of traveling !!!!!! <3 i’m so jealous !!!!!!!! italy sounds so beautiful i would love love to go some day :( ALSO U SMELLED THE BLUEBELL PERFUME RIGHT ???? U LIKED IT ?????? doesn’t it smell absolutely divine??? no matter how many scents i smelled after that i knew it was the right one for me ldkfsdlkfj <3 i’m still so in love with it ;____; also about ur lil rant about feeling lonesome :( bub i can really relate to this and i feel the same way like my mom and the rest of my family never pushed me to meet anyone and i’ve always never had a problem making friends, but like, as i’m older and i realize i’ll be alone a lot more of my time once i graduate like i really do want to share my life with someone :( i have a lot of love and i want to be able to show it to someone i care about a lot but i just never really take the initiative to do that bc quite honestly i’m not confident in myself lMAO so ,,,,,,, i know we never feel like we need to be dependent on someone but sharing experiences with someone who feels very strongly for u seems nice, doesn’t it? i wish this for both of us really soon okay?? <3 i tell my friends i would LOVE to be engaged right now lskdjfslfjs :’)

but anyways !!!!!!!! my mom and the rest of my family is doing well <3 and i’m doing okay too !!!!!! i don’t want to bore u with how clinicals are going but if u want me to tell u just let me know LOL and angel i know i say it all the time but always thank u so much for being patient with me okay? u are the absolute best !!!!!! also as promised, here are a few pics of my dorm room LOL it’s a shoebox but it’s my shoebox :) enjoy !!!!!! 

[onlyjihoons]

lifeguard! jinyoung

a/n; im so sorry i posted this hella late,, and this will be the last installment of my part of the xmas collab wink wonk:(( i hope you guys enjoyed reading it as much as i enjoyed writing them, have a merry merry christmas❤ these two weeks have been a blast, writing for wanna one with two of the most talented writers, xuan and l! i hope to collab with them again soon,, and if anyone wants to work with myself, drop me a message and i'll reply to it as soon as i can and also! dedicated to my wife,, tina,, @whatabrightplace i hope you like it bby happy birthday💕💕💕💕

this is part of the xmas collab wink wonk with @wannawrite and @hwinkinghwi t/w; drowning

-wild wild wet,, the better of the two major waterparks in singapore -having a bigger variety of thrill waterslides than their counterpart, adventure cove -also the cheaper one cough cough -jinyoung's a resident lifeguard at wild wild wet -clad in red sleeveless top and red bermudas, ray ban sunnies -and wet hair occasionally slicked to a comma style, jinyoung is the lifeguard that almost every female visitor has a crush on -lets be real here, some of them even come often just to have a glimpse of him -me -likes to stay at the wave pool so that he doesnt have to deal with visitors who hesitate to go on the ride,, holding up queues -sometimes has rotational shifts every hour, sometimes has rotational shifts every 2 or 3 hours -fellow lifeguard!jihoon and himself have the same duty slots, hence he isnt always the only one on duty -and has fun laughing at dumb jokes jihoon makes,, pushing him into the pool ever so often to mess with him too -has never really done cpr before, even tho he was trained for it -despite being the lifeguard almost everyone crushes on, theyre scared to approach him because either 1. they think he's attached 2. hes somewhat scary?? -just eyecandy uknow -some have bravely approached him and he heartlessly brushed them off, "im sorry im on duty, this can also hinder the safety of fellow visitors" -ouch -you were at wild wild wet thanks to your friend, who offered a free ticket to the waterpark

-and also because you had nothing to do on christmas, no partner, family doesn't celebrate christmas anyway

-you have heard from your friend that the waterpark was not only known for their rides, but also this super cute lifeguard who was working there

-you just rolled your eyes, you were beginning to think your friend was indirectly asking you to help her ask him out

-instead of just spending time with you

-anyway, the both of you went there fairly early, not wanting to be stuck in the queues for the rides

-the first ride the both of you went to was this ride called scorpion

-a straight drop from a chamber instead of your conventional slide

-you were lying if you said you weren't intimidated 

-there was no queue, to your surprise

-you had to climb up like 10 flights of stairs to reach the top,, to much for a 5 second ride

-when you reached the top, you were immediately regretting your life choices -the two chambers side by side, looked intimidating

-your friend then nudged you, pointing towards the lifeguard on duty, "that's the one, bae jinyoung."

-at this point of time, your brain had lost all forms of rational thoughts and was working on auto pilot

-you took a glance at the lifeguard busy tapping on his phone, he was indeed cute

-his jawline, and jet black hair made him super attractive

-it didnt help that the lifeguard had really toned arms too, but your brain directed your attention back to the ride, and you felt scared again, forgetting his name

-being the thrill seeker she was, your friend went ahead first

-as the trap door below her collapsed, you gasped in shock, making the lifeguard look back at you

-you soon noticed his gaze on you, and blush soon reached your cheeks

-"are you ready?" the lifeguard tilted his head as he watched you shiver in fear

-"i'm not too sure actually, im scared" you confessed

-"to be honest, this is actually less scary than the other ride," he pointed towards the steep, tall yellow slide right opposte, "this will be done in like, 5 seconds."

-you gulped, as you stepped into the chamber, looking down at the height you will be plummeting down in a few moments

-"it'll be fun, don't worry." the lifeguard smiled, closing the door

-you had no idea why, but with his smile, you were immediately assured and calm

-"lock your arms behind your head and hold your breath, you will be fine." he pushed the button, which began the countdown for the ride

-5, 4, 3, 2, 1

-followed by an eerie, menacing laugh, the trap door below you collapsed, and you were out in about 5 seconds, just like how the lifeguard depicted

-and it was much more fun than you imagined, as your friend cheered for you at the sidelines

-"y/n! i thought you were gonna back out!" your friend patted your back, "what made you ride it?!"

-"nothing," you smiled, "i just felt like it."

-after a few rides, both you and your friend were tired, and decided to laze at the wave pool

-it was almost 1pm, the sun blazing down on the waterpark

-you had been through almost 5 rotations of lifeguard changes, and you were beginning to get tired from threading water at the deeper end for almost an hour

-your friend promised that it was the last one, and the both of you would be back to riding the rides

-when the wave came, suddenly you felt a cramp in your foot, not allowing you to thread water anymore

-you felt yourself sinking, and trying to gasp for air but to no avail

-you tried to get your arms above the surface of water, but you had no strength in your arms as well

-you felt darkness close in around you soon, and you blanked out

-back on the surface, your friend was screaming for help

-and jinyoung was on wave pool duty

-just as the wave started, he saw a head disappear into the depths of the pool, and flailing arms, and also someone screaming for help

-immediately, he took off his top, and dived into the pool and swam towards you

-he managed to get you pretty quick, as your friend tried to swim against the tide to the surface 

-jinyoung checked for your breathing, luckily you were still breathing so he didnt need to administer the chest compressions

-all he needed to do was to supply oxygen into your lungs,, he hesitated for a moment, before going ahead to do the,, mouth-to-mouth resurrection(?)

-your friend was watching at the side, hoping you were okay

-within a few breaths, you were coughing out water as jinyoung tried to reposition you in an upright position

-he patted your back, to make sure all of the water was expelled

-"are you okay?" his eyes showed worry, as he frowned

-"y-yeah, i am." you hiccuped, your senses then clicking together, it was the same lifeguard from the first ride

-"i'll get some water for you, stay here." was all he said before running off to somewhere

-your friend then hugged you, sobbing, and in between you could only hear "i thought you were dying" and "i didnt want to lose you."

-you laughed, and assured her that you were fine

-then she stopped crying and smirked, "you know, that guard, bae jinyoung, was so worried for you earlier, almost crying when you didn't wake up by 3 breaths"

-just then, jinyoung came back with two bottles of water and a towel, your friend going away to somewhere and mumbling that she doesn't want to play gooseberry

-"here," jinyoung opened up the bottle, handing it to you, "are you okay?"

-you nodded, taking 2 gulps of the water as jinyoung drapped the towel around you, "thank you for saving me."

-jinyoung blushed, scratching his head, "its my job, dont mention it."

-the both of you ended up talking, and having lunch together, jinyoung forgetting about the shirt he abandoned at the guard post earlier

-attracting a whole lot of attention with his body lmao

-hearing whispers from girls saying, "she's so lucky", "is that his girlfriend?"

-the both of you had mac and cheese, the waterpark's signature dish

-after talking for a while, jinyoung then went silent

-"what happened?"

-"i don't know if this is too fast for me to say this but," jinyoung paused

-"hmm?"

-"i was wondering if you would like to go out with me sometime, like a d-date."

-you pinched yourself to make sure you weren't dreaming, and you felt pain, so you weren't

-"i'd love to, since i owe you one anyway," you grinned, "and you're cute too."

-"i'm cute?" jinyoung's eyes widened, and you immediately regretted your words, "thank goodeness im not the only one..."

-"only what?" you raised your eyebrows, as jinyoung suddenly stood up, "i have duty, i gotta go, kthxbye"

-you were puzzled, but jinyoung left behind a note, which was his number written on it, with "let's meet up soon^^"

-just then, your friend took the seat opposite you, putting her hand on her chin, "don't you think you owe me a meal too? for bringing the both of you together..."