#anyway if i keep this up i WILL be able to bridal carry joey by the time the wedding comes >:)

[suchaspookyginger]

bro this isn't a plug but stronglifts 5x5 is literally the reason why i can lift double the weight i was lifting a month ago and i'm not injured

[queenofcats17]

Spangle

@insane-control-room and I wrote out a backstory for the fusion between Johan and Freckle.

Here is the AO3 link. 

Freckle sighed, tapping his fingers against the table in his conundrum.

That being fusion. Freckle had seen a great many other Joeys fusing, and he would be lying if he said he was not at least a little bit jealous. It felt as though he were missing out on something, something big, something special. Although, the fact that he had only really ever interacted with one other Joey might have played a part in his lack of fusions. But that hardly mattered to him, not then. He wanted to fuse and he was going to do it. Nevermind that he had not thought any of this through at all and knew almost nothing about fusions. So, he opened a portal into that one Joey’s dimension, Johan’s dimension, and marched in.

Johan was reading on his couch when Freckle appeared from the portal. He rose an eyebrow and set his book aside to hear whatever Freckle might say.

“Can we talk?” Freckle asked. 

“S-Sure?” Johan gave him a small smile. “I mean, I-I’m not busy.”

“Good.” Freckle nodded and picked Johan up bridal style. Johan gave a small shriek of a gasp, clinging to the man whisking him away. Freckle grinned, watching Johan’s ears tilt back. It was not too hard for him to carry Johan through the portal since the other man was not too terribly heavy.

Once they were through the portal and it was closed, Freckle put Johan down.

“So, um, what did you w-want to talk about?” Johan asked, gaining his balance and turning to face the other Joey. His ears wiggled and he grinned slightly. “I’m all e-ears.”

“Would you be willing to fuse?” Freckle asked. Best to just get it out of the way. “I’ve seen other Joeys do it and, well, I want to do it too.”

Johan’s smile faded slowly.

“C-could you r-repeat that, please?”

“I want to fuse,” Freckle repeated, smiling brightly. “You’ve done it before, right?” 

He and Johan were friends. Good friends. Close friends. Surely it would be fine.

“I-I fused o-once, that’s correct,” Johan stuttered, his cane manifesting in his hands, a soft blue color. His mind scrambled to see what he could say instead of an outright ‘I can’t fuse’. “Um, it w-was very private….”

Freckle stared at him blankly, unsure what that meant. Was it supposed to be sexual? But he had seen Snowy and Gingie fuse before and they did not seem to have any sexual feelings towards one another, nor romantic ones at that. 

Johan shifted uncomfortably.

“I-It’s n-not a, um… thing for everyone,” Johan rambled, trying to assuage his own guilt. “S-sometimes things aren’t meant to be, uh, o-open?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Freckle snapped, his expression darkening. “Do you think I can’t do it?” 

“Th-that’s, um, not what I mean-n to say,” Johan, terribly flustered, managed to reply. “Fusion is a very c-complicated thing, a-and very p-personal, too.”

“I don’t understand what that’s supposed to mean!” Freckle was getting frustrated, waving his arms to punctuate his words. “Is it me? Do you not want to fuse with me specifically?!” That idea hurt him the most. The idea that Johan did not want him. 

“Freckle, p-please!” Johan intoned in a soft and worrisome voice, his hands wringing his cane over and over, trying to focus. He bit his lip, then continued. “It’s not you, it’s that I-I worry that you d-don’t know what you’re asking f-for.”

“Then tell me!” Freckle demanded. “What am I asking for?”

“When you fuse…” Johan took a moment to gather his thoughts. “There is no hiding. Th-the person you fuse w-with, you should-d trust them w-with your very soul, because that… th-that’s what you’re doing. That’s wh-what you’re asking for. For someone to see you, e-everything and anything you’ve ever d-done….”

Freckle immediately tensed at this revelation. He did not particularly fancy the idea of laying himself bare like that. But if it was Johan...

“I trust you,” he said, taking a step forward. Who better to trust himself with than a fellow Joey? They had both done horrible things, seen the worst each of them could be.

Johan stepped back, a strange blank look in his eye, stiffening. 

He swallowed. And then he swallowed again.

Any light in his eyes vanished, and they became dull, emotionless, cold.

“I can’t.” he flatly stated.

“Why not?” Freckle knew he sounded like a petulant child. He knew he was being unreasonable. But he wanted to be able to do the same thing all the other Joeys seemed able to do. He was just as good as them, wasn’t he?

“I just can’t.” Johan’s blank facade wavered, nearly snapping. He is afraid. He is lost. He would love to fuse. Especially with Freckle, the Joey he had such a wonderful brotherhood with. But, “I can’t fuse.”

Freckle’s first instinct was to throw a tantrum, to yell and scream until he got his way. But he was far too old for those (Esther would beg to differ on that front, but she was not there, not then). 

“You fused with Magenta.” He persisted, trying to stay calm and collected. Johan’s eyes widened in shock, and he tried to keep himself from trembling at the mention of the other man. “Was that just some kind of fluke?” There was a hint of vicious sarcasm in his words. 

“M-Mag and I thought we would never see each other a-again,” he breathed, hardly able to talk. “What happened was… yes. A m-miracle. A goddamn miracle….”

“If it happened once, it could happen again.” Gods, what was he even saying? This was ridiculous. He was ridiculous. Why was he so insistent on doing this? Didn’t he see how upset he was making Johan?

“Freckle….” Johan bites his lip again. “Freckle… I… I can’t fuse. I won’t tell you how Maggie and I managed it. I-It’s personal. And not my thing t-to say.”

Freckle sighed, his shoulders slumping. This was going nowhere. He was not going to convince Johan. No matter how hard he tried, Johan was not budging. 

“Can we just...try?” He asked quietly. Johan’s eyes softened. “Just to see if it works?”

Johan inhaled, and exhaled, then nodded.

“W-we can try,” he made himself say, hoping it was the right thing, hoping he was not lying. “We can try….”

Almost immediately, Freckle’s face lit up with a huge smile, Johan returning a tiny lopsided one. He had not actually expected that to work. But it had! He threw himself onto Johan, giving him a big hug.

“Thank you! Thank you so much!” He said.  Johan patted his back, muttering how it was nothing, though it very much was not.

Freckle hugged him tightly for a few minutes before pulling away. Johan’s arms lingered on his own for a few moments before dropping away. 

“So, how is this done?” He asked.

“It depends on each person,” Johan murmured. “I don’t kn-know how we’d do this.”

Freckle frowned, considering how this would go. Perhaps dancing? No no, that was too simple. Maybe a spell. Reciting an incantation? He thought he had seen Snowy and Gingie recite some sort of incantation for their fusion. But what would the incantation be? He began to chew on his lip.

“An incantation?” He ventured. “Or...dancing?” That was a stupid idea. He knew it was stupid. But sometimes the simplest solutions were the best ones.

“I really d-don’t know.” Johan sighed. He and Magenta… melted into one. But Freckle was not made out of ink. Even Joy would be easier to fuse with, being that the little man was at least half ink. Freckle, yes, was partially ink, but… it was not enough. “I don’t actually know a-any magic.”

“Oh, I know some.” Freckle said with a sheepish smile. “I did quite a lot of work researching spells back before my studio...” He trailed off a bit, his face falling. “Well, you know.” He shook his head. “Anyway, I’ve done research involving magic. I can’t imagine what sort of incantation we’d require for this, though.”

“Maybe y-you could come up with one,” Johan ponders. One, one. “Like two might be two b-but two can be one.”

“Oh! That’s very clever!” Freckle grinned. “Yes! Yes, that might work!” He held his hands out, making grabby hands to illustrate that Johan was supposed to hold them. Johan swallowed roughly and complied. Goodness, he was doing this, they were doing this.

“Alright.” Freckle gently squeezed Johan’s hands. “Here we go.” He closed his eyes, beginning to chant. “Two might be two but two can be one.”

He did not know whether this would work. He prayed it would. He wanted so badly to experience this act. Especially with someone he held so dear like Johan. And Johan could feel it. Unlike the last time, with Magenta, there was no smooth passage. It burned. He forced the gasp from rising out of his throat, only tightened his hands around Freckle’s, resisting the urge to push him away to nurse himself into feeling better, anything but the sensation of being forced back within his own mind and body. Yet he held tighter, and kept his breathing steady. He could not allow his trembling limbs to betray him.

There was a sense of elation for Freckle as he felt their two forms become one. He was doing it! He was fusing! But as their consciousnesses merged, he became aware of a searing pain. For a moment, he was not sure where it was coming from. Then it hit him. It was coming from Johan. Johan was in pain. Fusing with him was causing Johan pain.

Johan was in pain because of him.

Freckle began to panic. No no no no no! He could not be the cause of anyone’s pain! Not again! Especially not Johan.

But it was too late to back out then.

Not when they were already breathing as one.

Freckle tried to pull away, but it was no use. It was like squeezing a sponge. They separated just a bit, but were quickly reabsorbed into each other. And Johan’s cry of pain from their shared mouth solidified them. One arm wrapped around them tightly. 

“S-stop, d-don’t!” escaped their lips. “But you’re in pain! It’s fine! No, we need to stop! W-we can’t now…. I’m hurting you! Can’t split fast…. This is hurting you! Gotta be gradual…. I don’t want to hurt you!”

In their mind, Freckle was in tears, apologizing over and over. He hadn’t meant for this. He hadn’t meant to cause Johan pain. He shouldn’t have pushed so hard. Shouldn’t have insisted on this. But Johan clung to him, his face flushed as though in a fever, and shook his head with the smile of an angel. 

“It’s not your fault,” they said, slowly, testing their own voice, finding it creaky but warm. Tears leaked from two of their eyes. A sleeved hand gently dried the tears away, and remained on their cheek comfortingly. Their lips form into a shaky, lopsided smile. “It’s okay, okay?”

Their breath hitched a bit as Freckle managed to calm himself down a bit. Two eyes glanced down at the sleeve that had dried their tears. That was a cardigan. They were wearing a cardigan. Kind of like the ones Esther was fond of wearing around the house. It was a blue-grey color, and incredibly soft. Another one of their arms wrapped around themself, forming a small soft barrier from the terrifying idea of being ripped apart. They would let go in their own steady time. 

“Let’s make this good while we can,” they said, surprisingly, in yiddish.

Freckle felt a warmth at the words. No one had spoken yiddish to him in years. Not since he had left home. The familiar tones brought back that feeling of home. He almost began crying all over again, but Johan noticed and hugged him tightly, their shared left arm mimicking the motion. 

“Stop blaming yourself,” they scolded themself, sounding like a yenta to her grandchildren, especially in the dialect they used so softly. “You couldn’t have known. I wasn’t open enough about it.” They laughed. “You sound like Esther. But...I guess you’re right.”

“It’s not the first time you’ve said that,” they pouted back, but smiled again, their starry freckles pulsing and glowing brighter. They noticed the quop, and held up a hand, noting how the light freckles stood out against their dark skin. Like stars in the sky. A gasp of awe, their four eyes widening. “We’re… we’re spangled.”

Freckle had never been one to wear anything sparkly, but the idea of being sparkly suddenly appealed to him. He felt...beautiful. He had never felt beautiful before, and it was rather… nice.

“D-do you, um… like it?” part of them tentatively asked. Their lips curled up in a soft smile. “I do. G-good. I think it’s who we are. Spangle. What do you think?” As names went, it was far from the worst, but a giggle still escaped them. “It’s wonderful. We’re wonderful.”

They laughed a little, but a jolt of pain scampered through their spine, and they coughed, and coughed, though it subsided after a few moments. A soft turquoise cane snapped into their hand, helping them balance themself on their feet.

Freckle’s guilt resurfaced. He had almost forgotten how much pain this fusion was causing Johan. He should never have let himself be lost in the moment. Johan looked at him with the slightest hint of a frown, then sighed, smiled, and hugged him, pressing a chaste kiss onto his pseudo brother’s cheek.

“We’re gonna enjoy this while we can, right?” They gently rested a hand on their cheek. “No dwelling on that. Not now.” Their expression turned sheepish and they nodded. “Sorry. Of course.”

And so they waited it out. Well, it was more than just waiting it out. They explored who they were now. Or, at least, for the moment. They sang, and walked around, and found a mirror. They smiled at themself, for themself, to themself. Despite the aches and tremors, they overall, emotionally, felt… relief. Surprise. And above all else, happy. Freckle still felt bad for forcing Johan into this, but he was happy to be able to share this with him. Spangle enjoyed being themself.

They enjoyed it to the very last moment being together, when, like a star, they glowed bright and hot and split into a supernova, and out of it, Johan and Freckle split. The two of them found themselves on the floor, facing each other. Freckle was on top of Johan, and they were wrapped in a tight hug. Johan’s big red eyes were exhausted, but he was smiling. 

“Thank you.” Freckle whispered, breathless and flushed.

“It was…” Johan closed his eyes, yawning, sharp teeth glinting for a moment. His teeth always made Freckle think of a cat. “It was good.” 

“I’ll...try not to do that again.” Freckle awkwardly removed himself from on top of the taller man. “Push you, I mean.”

Johan shrugged. “I shoulda been more clear as to what I meant. Hey, d-do you have something to eat?”

“Oh! Of course!” Freckle scurried off to the kitchen. He was not sure what exactly was in his pantry at the moment. He had not gone to the store in a bit. 

Thankfully, he had some leftover pasta in the fridge, as well as some cereal. He returned with the tupperware balanced on one arm, the box of cereal under his arm, and a jug of milk. The milk was for him. Mostly. Johan looked at the food, his pupils contracting, and then expanding, and he grinned. 

“Goodness, what a feast,” he joked softly, pushing himself off the ground to sit at the table like the human he was not.

“I think I have some other things,” Freckle muttered as he put everything down. “But this was all I could carry.” He unscrewed the cap of the milk and started drinking it. In the back of his head, he could hear Esther scolding him for drinking straight from the jug rather than getting himself a glass. Johan did not bat an eye, merely began scarfing down the food the moment he could, the spaghetti vanishing in a matter of a minute or so.

“Maybe I should have brought more.” Freckle couldn’t help but laugh.

“Mmm, it’s enough to keep me going,” Johan hummed, munching on the cereal. “I’ll bother my bees when I get home and steal their honey.”

“You have bees?” Logically, he should have known this. He had seen the pictures done of Johan as a bee. But the idea of Johan having bees was still incredibly exciting. The only time Freckle had ever been close to a bee was that time in elementary school when one of the other boys had found a dead bee on the playground and insisted upon showing everyone. Freckle had gotten to hold it. Then another child had eaten it. 

“Of course I do,” Johan smiled. “I love them dearly. And my garden provides a symbiotic environment for them - I give them food, and so do they for me.”

“That’s so cool.” Freckle leaned on the table, watching him in awe, like a child watching a favorite grownup. Johan finished the box of cereal, and turned it over with a frown, not even getting a crumb. He squinted at it as though it were the source of all his tribulations.

“If you’re still hungry, I think I have some kosher hotdogs from when Rachel and Isaac came over.” Freckle quickly snapped himself back to reality, going to check the fridge. 

“Wait, Freckle, I’m vegetarian!” Johan quickly stopped him. “Well, most of the time, at least. Don’t worry, I just needed to pick up some strength. Spangle really winded me.”

“Well, alright.” Freckle sat back down.

Johan smiled at him.

“I’ll...I’ll try to listen better next time.” Freckle said. 

“Nah,” Johan grinned. “It was fun.”