#anyway haha if you made it this far ask me about them please heart emoji

[vicelapse]

thinking about. the orion hawke eliel lavellan parallels. but also how theyre both so incredibly different. orion who was the eldest, had to lead and be a good example for his siblings, regardless of his own fears and anxieties. meeting eliel, who was the youngest, had to be led and protected, and shies away from power while orion fills the gaps with bluster and jokes.

I think a lot about them meeting and orion all at once seeing bits of himself from when he first got to kirkwall. He sees all his own fears plain as day when after meeting eliel just. "does it ever get easier?" and he just has to reply "no. it doesn't." because its been 10 years and still he thinks about how he could have done things better and how he should have looked out for carver more and how he should have told his mom he loved her and-

[v-lynx-2]

So .. a little jake x reader, hope you enjoy it.

Oh, English isn't my first language so.. yeah.

_________________________________________

Hannah was found and the kidnapper was turned to justice, Jake was relived to find her alive so were you and the rest of the group, also richy was found close to hannah and in now at the hospital.

You were so happy to know that they were okay and that richy is alive. 

While calling the group and telling them how happy you were and asking hannah if she was okay, you suddenly felt something, a feeling you couldn't  describe, then you remembered Jake, how he just said few words and was silent, online but didn't say anything afterwards.

The group took their own time to get together once again offline, you said it was fine and that you were happy to help, but of course jessy kept sending you pictures every now and then.

You texted jake: 

Y/n = I'm so glad she is okay 

Y/n = we did a great job! 

You didn't send anything later because of that feeling you had earlier, it was growing by the second. 

As flashbacks of everything that happened surfed into your mind 

" this important puzzle piece " 

" trust me " 

" as long as they trust you, it doesn't matter "

" (y/n) is the key "

Am I just "a puzzle piece " ?, you thought to yourself 

A notification cut your line of thought, it was jake.

Jake = I'm relieved 

Jake=  And yes, you did a great job Thank you, y/n.

Y/n = it was teamwork ! 😄

Y/n =I don't think I would have made it that far without you. 

Jake = on the contrary, you showed me how well you can do without my help.

Jake = you never let me down :) 

           Jake <offline>

You smiled, that emoji he sent always makes you smile.

But that feeling was growing faster than before as jake went offline. 

Was it worry? Fear? It made you feel uneasy.  

After few pics from jessy, a thank you call from lily and her parents, the time went by with hearing anything else from jake.

And there is that feeling again, you say back trying to understand your emotions.

You had been thinking of something for a while, that maybe..he just wanted to make sure you help him get more information. As a face, someone the others can trust until hannah is found and then disappe- 

Another notification.

It was Jessy, she told you that Phil was let out of jail. 

You said that you are happy for her 

Jessy = thank you, y/n, this wouldn't have happened without you, you did so many great things for us 🥺💖💖

Y/n = aww jessy 💖 

You texted with her for a while then back to the ground chat. 

Again, no jake in sight. 

You excused yourself and went offline. 

That feeling started to get unbearable

 was all of this for me to stay working on the case ? 

Was he.. acting like this so I help him solve this case until the end? 

You refused to believe that but his constant disappearance made you sure of it. 

So, you decided, to leave him be, not wait for texts anymore, not send walls of texts that you thinks he reads anyway. 

Not to waste time waiting. 

Hot tears fell from your eyes at the realization

 if that was the case then.. I shouldn't bother him anymore, ... it must have been hard for him too. 

You put your phone down and went to do whatever to distract you from your phone. 

Secretly waiting for a notification, anything that would prove you wrong.

But it never happened, jessy was busy that day too, you checked on the others and hannah, she seemed to be in good spirits. 

You talked for awhile and then.

Hannah = you don't feel so good, do you? 

Y/n = wait, how did you know? 

Hannah = I just noticed it.

Y/n = eh.. well, it isn't a big deal, really. 

Hannah = No, it's fine , you can talk to me 

Y/n = you went through much, I don't want you to think about this, it doesn't matter ,really 

Y/n = so how is richy? 

You tried to change the topic, hannah noticed but she didn't say anything about it. 

As you tried to keep your emotions in check, you went to read your old massages again with Jake, before they used to feel good, now.. they only made you feel worse.

Could it be the end, because he didn't reply yet.

A notification came after a while. 

Jake= if you don't mind, I read your conversation with hannah. 

Y/n = and ? 

Jake = I think she is, right.

Y/n = you don't have to do this again, we found her. 

Jake = of course, I apologize.

Something stopped you from texting right after. 

If finding hannah was the only important thing, why does he bother texting me again? 

Is it.. out of pity? .. he must felt like he owed me something..

A day later, without a text from you to begin his day, he started to grow worried.

He went to check on you but you were offline, this wasn't usual around that time, he made nym0s to alert him once you go online, but you didn't that day.

I knew this was gonna happen, she was only helping me out of fear.. 

Jake spent that day wondering if he should resume you that he won't harm you, but that is something he might not be able to control.. it could be dangerous for you to be with him. 

His thoughts did make him feel any better, as they all turn in your direction. 

Next day,

Nym0s sent an alert to jake. 

 phil is calling, you look at your phone expecting someone else, but you were disappointed.

Phil -> Y/n, hello there cutie, I wanted to thank you for getting me out of jail, you know, why don't you come to duskwood? 

A party at my place, just for you, dear. 

Y/n -> a party?, for me? Aww that is so nice of you, phil, I would love to- 

Suddenly the call has ended 

Jake = I terminated the call. 

Y/n = but why did you do that?!  

Jake = didn't you promise me something?.

Y/n = what does it matter now?!

Jake = I'm aware of the fact that the culprit is already taken care of , but you know I can't stand him.

Y/n = who? Phil ? , he was let out of jail after a false charge.

Jake = I'm also aware of that fact.

You stopped replying, why is he still doing this anyway, am I still useful? 

Of course, as a cover. 

Jake = y/n, you aren't planning to go to duskwood, are you?

You didn't reply again .

Jake = y/n ? 

Jake = are you alright?

  You decided to text him this is non of his business but you paused to wipe your tears as them falling on the screen made it harder to text. 

Jake = why are you doing this? 

Fear has found it's way to Jake's heart once again because of you, he couldn't stand the thought of losing you, but he tried to be as understanding as possible.. as much as he could. 

Y/n = I'm just giving you space, wouldn't it be better if I didn't waste your time? And no, don't worry I'm not going,  I don't want remember this again.

Y/n = it's fine , jake. .. you can just leave. 

He couldn't understand what you meant by that, he just felt how hurt you were, which made him feel hurt as well.

Jake = y/n, what makes you think I want to leave? 

            Y/n <offline>

You just didn't want to have that conversation, you already feel pitiful and hate yourself for it. 

Your heart was aching, with every second that passed. 

Till your phone started ringing. 

You thought it was probably Phil again, and this time you were wrong.

It was Jake, but why would he call now anyway? 

You tried to ignore him, but the pain you felt in your chest was too hard to bear. 

You answered. 

Jake -> y/n, please, listen to me, I want you to tell me what happened. 

You were trying to calm down so you could say a thing, it was his same voice changer and that tone of his. 

You couldn't help but remember the times you felt so happy to hear from him. 

Y/n -> ....n..nothing.  

Jake did something different this time, he turned of the voice changing program. 

Jake -> y/n, I understand if you want to cut ties with me after all of this, .. I wouldn't blame you.

Jake -> I want you to know that I had the best time of my life with you and I will cherish these moments. 

Jake -> I understand your fear, I know you wouldn't want to be associated with a person like I am. 

Jake -> so, don't worry, I will go away, after you tell me that you are okay. 

Jake -> I want to hear it from you, one last time. 

You took a while to reply, but he waited, he didn't want to do anything else but wait.. hold you.. and tell you everything will be okay,  but he thinks now that you don't want this.. you don't want him.. a person who no one can trust, it is surprising, he made get in a lot of dangerous situations before, only him to blame. 

Y/n -> I'm.. not afraid, not of you or anyone.  

Jake -> y/n .. 

Y/n -> I love you, okay!, I just .. I just can't stand the fact that.. you were only here for someone else... I know it's selfish of me, I know nothing should be about me at all! 

Just .. just why? ... why did you make me feel this way if you didn't actually like me? ..  why?. .. 

Jake -> I feel the same way, ever since we met, you piqued my interest, I started to think of you constantly, even after trying to control myself, because I know how dangerous it would be for both of us... y/n, I love you. 

Jake -> I understand how you feel, you trusted me blindly through this whole situation, without me giving you any proof. 

Jake -> y/n, I don't want to leave, I want to be with you, that's why I had been absent for a while, i want to make our dreams a reality. 

Jake -> I want you to be there. With me. 

Y/n-> .. you know.. I like your voice.

Jake -> Haha,  I love yours.  

Y/n -> you said something about proof, what did you mean by that? 

Jake -> you will know when the time comes, love.

Y/n -> oooh come on! For real ! 

Jake -> yes, now, tell me. What would you like to do today? 

Y/n -> I.. didn't feel like doing anything today..

Jake -> do you remember that virtual date you had with Jessica? 

Y/n -> don't tell me, you don't like her either? 

Jake-> not as much as her brother, but I like her idea. 

Y/n -> so? 

Jake -> if you are feeling better now, I want to ask you if.. we can a have a virtual date, what do you think? 

Y/n -> I will tell you when the time comes. 

Jake -> I love you, y/n. 

Y/n -> I love you too. 

Bonus:

Phil = hey, I didn't hear your reply.

??? = :)

Phil = what?

<you can't reply to this conversation>

[whisperingrockers]

would u. i dunno. perhaps articulate some thots on toh infinity train au 😳 if u can

HM. i will do my best. but...i dont really know how to organize my thoughts.  i guess i should probably just start with the characters and go from there, huh. also in this particular au these characters don’t actually take the place of tulip, lake, jesse, grace, etc- i think they’re all just there under different circumstances. 

Luz

okay so we’ll start with Luz because. she’s the main character, y’know. very important. i think the catalyst that brings her to the train is her mother signing her up for Reality Check summer camp because as a creative it’s just! disheartening to have someone you love tell you that you’re not going to make it in this world if you don’t conform to what everyone else wants. so of course when a huge mysterious locomotive suddenly pulls up to the bus stop you KNOW luz gets on, no hesitation. after all, isn’t that something right out of a sci-fi adventure novel? 

unlike tulip, luz is THRILLED to find herself on some unknowable train where each car is a new adventure just waiting to happen, where there are always new friends to make, new places to see, and tons of puzzles to solve? she’s made to feel like the protagonist right out one of her fave animes. 

also, really important to note that her number is probably tied to how she relates to the other passengers on the train. i feel like there’s an overarching theme in the show about how luz is going through a lot of firsts when it comes to interpersonal relationships, especially friendships, so i wanted to keep that going in this au- i imagine her number goes up when she finds her friends tapes and convinces them to watch with her because this is obviously the easiest and most straightforward way to get to know them! (luz poppin that bad boy into a vcr player: this mama is ready for trauma!) 

realized how wordy this is going to be LOL

Eda

hough so this is a human au also (i assume? infinity train world really do be existing in some limbo state of reality where your reflection can just up and ditch you). i see her as a jack of all trades, master of none type, with a lean towards perfumes and handmade soaps that she sells at fairs or farmers markets and also pickpocketing. i think she sees something that reminds her of the life she used to have/would have had before lilith [redacted because i do not know what she DID yet but on GOD we will have canon continuity] and that drives her to get on the next train headed anywhere.

her number is tied to how much she allows herself to open up; the more she uses her salesman cover to keep others at arms length, the higher her number goes, which is why it’s so important for her to team up with King and Luz; they help her open up and be more honest with herself.  

King

king is actually a denizen of the train in this au; i love him too much to turn him into a real ass dog, so i wont. eda meets him in a car full of plush toys, which he refers to lovingly as his army of the damned. i almost want to hold off on writing up any more for him because i know there’s more to king’s character than meets the eye. still torn between eda trying to bring him off the train with her or having him realize that the whole TRAIN is HIS KINGDOM, and all its passengers loyal peons who need their mighty rulers HELP, for without him they would PERISH.

for now though eda sees him and is immediately like get over here (reaching emoji) 

Willow 

willow is a tough one for me because in all honesty having your longtime friend tell you out of the blue that they can’t be friends with you anymore would be enough to send me packing to the train, but with willow i think it’s less about amity and more about how the fallout between them affects her social and academic success. the frustration reaches a tipping point that has her running out of the classroom and finding the train. 

and yes, willow is a very sensible, bright girl, but she was also SO ready to trick the principle and steal from the emperor for her friend so i don’t think getting on a mystery train is wholly out of the question for her, y’know? 

There’s a lot about repression in the way willow deals with things generally, so her number is tied to passivity. the more she allows others to infringe on her personal boundaries to keep them placated, the higher her number goes. when she stands up for herself to others (sometimes even her friends!) the number goes up. willow x agency and clear limitations is my otp

Gus

gus was actually a SUPER easy one for me we know so much about him from the episodes he’s been in; he’s an overachiever, he’s passionate about what he loves, he’s a natural showman, and he is constantly pushing himself to be the best that he can be, all the time. the hustle doesn’t STOP for gus, and i...i...(tears up) 

anyways, i think the thing that draws him to the train is getting suddenly ousted from the club he formed at school. he’s young, and having everyone you had assumed were your friends turn their back on you and throw you out of the space that you CREATED FOR THEM would be shocking to anyone, but it broke gus’ heart clean in two. after he’d picked his bag and himself up off the hallway floor, he’d left the building in a daze, not even realizing as he boarded the train door that had suddenly opened up in front of him until it was too late. 

i’m actually going to go so far as to say that gus would likely be the one MOST interested in the truth of the train- he’d be asking the tough questions, like what is the purpose of the train? who made it and its technology? where does it exist that it can be both at his school and also speeding across a barren desert landscape at the same time? How does it create sentient lifeforms? the train helps him discover a new passion; journalism. he finds a journal that speaks to him as a friend and advisor in one of the trains, and he takes careful note of everything that happens to and around him. by the time he meets up with willow, he’s got so many ideas and theories that the other girl would have never thought to consider until that very moment. 

idk what his number relates to because he’s perfect the way he is but if i had to take a shot in the dark it probably has something to do with finding somewhere he feels he can belong, as well as being able to mourn and let go of the people he’d considered his friends before he’d gotten on the train. 

sorry this is so long i just have a lot of . gus feelings. 

Amity ( + Edric + Emira )

lumping these whites together 

okay so nobody wants to hear me talk about blight angst there are 800 posts about blight angst, so long story short the three siblings run away, get into an argument with each other, amity ditches them for the train while they’re asleep, and the twins panic and chase after her, determined to find her because in the end they’re all they’ve got. 

‘next stop: amity blight’ 

i think it’d be a cool journey to see the three of them going from ‘we need to be together out of necessity’ to ‘we need to be together because we love each other, and that genuine support structure will pull us through when everything else fails.’ but in order for that to happen they all have to have their own journey, so at some point edric and emira finally get into a spat and that’s enough to get edric and emira stuck on opposite ends of a retracting bridge. send that mans to the BACK of the train. 

emira: my greatest fear is being stuck with edric forever emira: (gets separated from edric)  emira: haha wait please say psyche

amity’s number is definitely tied to her fear of failure, of not being enough for the people she holds closest to her- in this case her siblings, and then lilith, and then luz when they finally meet. when she acts without concern for what the people around her think and when she sticks up for what she knows is right, even when the majority is against her, her number goes down. 

for ed and em im...i don’t want to think about their feelings because they’re supposed to be clowns but i am forced to consider that they may be jealous of their sisters independence. also separating them means they both have to take responsibility for all their own actions and choices, which is probably pretty new for the twins. 

Lilith 

im out of energy actually znzzzsnsz uh. estranged sister who sees something that reminds her of the relationship she used to have and she’s not actually as over it as she thought so the train....she..hghrg

[captainillogical]

Devil’s Ballroom Ch.7

A year after the events from the earth’s final attack, Little Homeworld is finally complete, and there’s a new jazz bar where gems and humans mingle and drink. - As you’re typing back a reply, someone pulls the stool out next to you and takes a seat. You see a sliver of pink out of the corner of your eye as you try not to actually Look. Oh god. It’s her. God can’t help us now.

Spinel/Reader

collab with my lovely wife @firstofficertightpants​

ya’ll im sorry lmao

You spend the rest of your evening doing exactly none of the errands that you needed to deal with today. Instead, you're laying on your couch and texting your friends.

         Y/N: I'm so tornnnn.

     Y/N: Do I say something about the cheek smooch?

     Y/N: Should I leave it be?

     Y/N: Because she's texting like nothing happened.

     Y/N: What if I'm reading too much into it??

     Y/N: What if that's just how she shows friendship affection???

     Y/N: I might make it so fucking awkward if I assume something!

     Y/N: This entire ordeal is mortifying!!!

     Y/N: I want nothing more than to dig a big hole and lie in it forever.

     Y/N: I might be low-key having a panic attack about this rn but what's new.

     Harper: Y/N. chill. you're way overreacting to this.

     Harper: even if it meant nothing, she still likes you as a friend right?

     Harper: i think it would take a lot for her to like.. not wanna stay friends lol.

     Alex: im just saying you could probably kiss her and she'd be ok with it

     Alex: cheek kisses are pretty forward

     Harper: don't listen to him. all of his relationships ended in failure.

     Alex: wow

     Alex: im seriously hurt

     Harper: am I wrong?

     Alex: no..

     Harper: my point exactly.

     Harper: i’m not saying you have nothing to lose or anything.

     Harper: because i myself had to tread very carefully with leah..

     Harper: but i think you should just see where it goes and not like

     Harper: put too much emphasis on this incase it was nothing.

     Y/N: Yeah see now you have me worried it WAS nothing!!

     Alex: oh my goooooooddddddddddddddd

     Alex: the both of you approach women so.. pathetically

     Alex: take a risk

     Alex: live a little

     Alex: what is seriously the worst that could happen

     Alex: she kills you??

     Alex: lmao

     Alex: its funny cuz of.. you know

     Harper: i can’t wait to be home and smothering him with a pillow instead of affection.

     Y/N: You and me both.

     Y/N: Try being the only one available to play games with him.

     Alex: both of you fucking love me okay

     Alex: alsooooooo i get to be home the day after tomorrow

     Alex: the alex is back, babieeeeee

     Y/N: Harper please come home I’m BEGGING you.

     Harper: sorry you gotta deal with him alone for another month lmao.

     Y/N: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

     Alex: can i get a fucking crumb of love here please

         You swipe over to the couple of messages Spinel has left you in the past couple of minutes while you were talking to your friends.

         Spinel: It’s another stupid ball, I just found out.

     Spinel: I told her that I’m sitting this one out this time.

     Spinel: She has so many others that would absolutely love to help her, and yet, still absolutely insists that I must be there.

     Spinel: I don’t want to go back to homeworld right now, and not for this.

     Y/N: And you put your foot down? Hell yeah, dude.

     Y/N: Planning a ball for a bunch of gems sounds like a chore anyway.

     Spinel: oh, it is, believe me.

     Spinel: And they need everything to be PERFECT.

     Spinel: Which isn’t realistic anymore now that they don’t expect any of the gems to stay in line with their gem class nowadays.

     Spinel: The last ball they threw almost 4 months ago was utterly chaotic.

     Y/N: For thousands of years y'all as a race never pushed to deviate from the norm, and now that you guys are allowed to? I’d go batshit with it too.

     Y/N: Being stifled in everyday life, and finally you’re free?

     Y/N: Fuck, I’d go around fusing with anyone!

     Spinel: That is precisely what too many of them did.

     Y/N: Lmao. I wish I could’ve seen that.

         You tab back over to your group chat for a moment to see what they’re talking about.

         Harper: see? they’re everywhere.

     Harper: i wasn’t expecting the campsite to have so many.

     Alex: you could have built an army and instead you took pictures

     Alex: do you know how easy it is to lure chipmunks?

     Alex: oh that lil guy on the bottom right is so fucking chunky i love him

     Harper: that’s the one that got the closest when i fed them. :3

     Alex: oh i fuckin BET

     Alex: you dont get that chubby in the wild without takin a few risks

     Alex: if u know what i mean ;)

     Harper: i hate whatever you just implied.

     Y/N: It’s not a conversation with Alex unless you roll your eyes at least 3 times.

     Alex: hey i thought it was 4 times

     Alex: dont insult me

     Alex: anyway, y/n

     Alex: are you workin the day i come back

     Y/N: Yeah I’m actually scheduled a double.

     Alex: scheduled

     Y/N: Yes.

     Alex: a double

     Y/N: Yes.

     Alex: he can’t SCHEDULE you a DOUBLE

     Y/N: He can if he asks me ahead of time as a favor.

     Alex: that fuckin bastard

     Alex: always ruining my plans

     Harper: you’re still mad at him for firing you last summer, huh.

     Alex: OF COURSE I AM

     Y/N: Bro you stole like $300 of cotton candy sugar that summer.

     Y/N: It’s only fair.

     Y/N: Besides, I’m only doing this because he said he’d give me a long weekend for it.

     Alex: kay well

     Alex: i guess i’ll just go bug you at work and wait for you to get off that day :'(

     Y/N: Get me written up again, I swear to god.

         Your phone chimes several times, and you swipe down to see messages from both Spinel and Steven. You check Spinel's first.

         Spinel: Do me a favor and ignore any messages Steven has sent you.

     Y/N: What are you, my boss?

     Spinel: I MEAN IT

         You quickly switch over to Steven's texts.

         Steven: I was going to ask you if your date with Spinel went okay, but I'm assuming it went fine considering she hasn't really stopped talking about you.

         Ohhhh my god, this is wild. You reply to him.

         Y/N: It wasn't a date as far as I know.

     Y/N: I had fun.

     Y/N: She's telling me to not read your messages, lmao.

     Y/N: Also what do you mean she hasn't stopped talking about me??

     Steven: She’s been lying on my floor for the last hour basically gushing about you.

     Steven: But you didn’t hear that from me!

     Steven: :D

     Y/N: Haha thanks, kid.

         You switch back over to text Spinel, and get up off the couch to make yourself some tea. Pulling out your kettle, you turn the stove on and grab some raspberry flavored abomination tea bag that your dad loves more than any of the other good tea flavors.

         Y/N: Sooooo.

     Spinel: You talked to him, didn’t you.

     Y/N: Hahaha noooo. :)

     Spinel: The fuck did he say?

     Y/N: Absolutely nothing.

     Spinel: Seriously? I was sure he’d reveal something embarrassing.

     Y/N: Nope! You should probably get off his floor eventually, though.

         Your kettle goes off and you grab a clean mug, and pour the boiling water into it along with the tea packet. You look down at your phone, and grin.

         Spinel: goddammit.

         You let the bag steep for a little bit, and add in a small amount of sugar. Walking up to your bedroom you take a snap of Jellybean half lounging, half falling off the stairs and send it to Spinel. She replies with a couple heart emojis, and you wonder if Steven was the one to show her the proper use of them. You set your cup of tea down on your desk, and turn your computer on. It’s evening now, and it’s much too late to do anything left with the rest of your day productivity-wise, so you settle in on playing more minecraft. Your thoughts wander quite a bit, and you find yourself stuck on thinking about Spinel. Naturally. You wonder about a lot of things she’s learned while staying on earth, from things like - does she pay rent? Does she have a job? Does she know what taxes are? Does she know what a relationship with a human looks like? She said she watched a movie, but didn’t exactly elaborate. You don’t know what human-norms she’s been exposed to. You can’t even concentrate enough to mine any of this redstone for Alex, and you nearly die in-game when the thought of ‘does she know what sex is?’ pops into your mind. You grab your phone and shoot Spinel another message.

         Y/N: Quick question.

     Y/N: If you don’t mind me asking.

         It takes her a few minutes to reply.

         Spinel: Sure?

     Y/N: Do you know how humans are made?

     Spinel: w

     Spinel: Yes?

     Spinel: Steven told me about it a few weeks ago actually.

     Spinel: Why are you asking?

     Y/N: No reason! Just curious is all.

     Spinel: Hm.

         Yeah you’re not too confident that she actually knows, and you’re too chickenshit to elaborate right now. You’ll enlighten her later. You spend the rest of the night browsing memes on your phone, and texting your friends and Spinel on occasion. Before you know it, your eyes drift close with your phone in hand.

     You wake up when your alarm goes off for your morning shift, and curse at yourself for not charging it last night. It’s at a solid 32%, which isn’t really enough to go about your day, but you’ll have to make do. You get ready for a hopefully not shitty day, lock up the house, and head in to work.

     It’s a complete shitshow when you come in, and you turn your phone off to save battery and concentrate on dealing with more than an average amount of tourists. You find Mr. Smiley sleeping in the breakroom/office/supply closet, and have half a mind to lock him in there from the outside for the rest of your shift. It’s pretty busy, and messy, and it isn’t until you’re there for several exhausting hours that you finally have enough time for a break. You turn your phone on, and instantly you’re flooded with messages from several different people. Ugh.

           A couple from your dad - just checking in, really. Group chat too as usual, but none of it seems overly important. One from Spinel, and several from Steven. You open up Spinel’s message first.

         Spinel: Do you think we could talk about a couple of things later?

         Vague, and a little concerning. You text back an apology for getting back to her so late, and open the messages from Steven.

         Steven: Hey are you busy?

     Steven: I’m dealing with a bit of a situation right now, and could use your help.

     Steven: Spinel locked herself in my bathroom, and she won’t come out.

     Steven: She refuses to answer to anyone, and several of us have tried.

     Steven: I’m just really worried about her, and you guys seemed to bond, so I was hoping..

     Steven: That maybe you could come over?

     Steven: Thanks regardless.

         You check the timestamp, and that was over an hour ago. Jesus christ.

         Y/N: Steven I’m so sorry, my phone was off and I’m at work, give me a few and I’ll be right over, okay?

     Y/N: I’ll be quick.

         He replies almost immediately with a “please” and you pocket your phone. You try not to worry too hard about Spinel as you rush over to grab your things, and knock on Mr. Smiley’s office/broom closet door. He opens it groggily, clearly just waking up.

     “Yeah?” he slowly blinks at you.

     “I gotta leave early. Emergency.” You stare at him, trying to not be pissed at his lack of work ethic.

     “Are you for real? You’ve got another 3 hours left.” He says and crosses his arms, and you glare at him.

     “I’ve been working my ass off while you’ve been sleeping this whole time, AND I’m covering your ass tomorrow so you can go meet your old friend! So the LEAST you can do is let me go early when I have an emergency!!!” You almost yell out at him, and he holds his hands up in defense.

     “Okay, okay! Fine. Only because you’re a good worker.” He says, and has the gall to look at least a little ashamed of himself.

     “Damn right I am.” You spin around and head out of the building, practically running.

     You almost trip and bite it several times on the way over to Steven’s place, but you’re more worried about Spinel. You’ve only been to his place twice, but once you’re there you run up the stairs and open the door without knocking. You’re greeted by the only two people in the living room, Pearl, and Steven.

         “Oh, she’s here!” Pearl says and nudges Steven, who looks up from typing on his phone.

     “Y/N! Thank god you’re here.” He says with furrowed eyebrows.

     “What happened?” You say and shut the door, and cross the room over to him.

     “I’m not sure! We were just working on something together for Amethyst, and she got a call from Blue and Yellow. She’s been ignoring them lately, and they’ve been bothering me in turn because of that, so I asked her to take the call just see what they want.” He runs his hand through his brown curls, and just for a moment, you see that 12 year old him in again. The obvious stress masks just how young he really is, and you feel bad that he can’t live life like a normal kid. “She went outside to take the call, and was out there for quite a while. I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop, but I did hear some yelling. And just when I was going over to make sure they were alright, she comes back in tears, eyes spiraling like months ago, and nearly knocks Pearl over rushing into the bathroom.”

     “And nothing since?” You inquire, fidgeting with your hands.

     “No,” He says, frustratedly. “I’ve been trying to reach the diamonds to see what this is all about, but I’ve only been getting the pearls. I don’t know what to do. She hasn’t been like this in months. What were they talking about to make her this upset?”

     “Maybe I can find out. You said she’s in your bathroom?” You raise an eyebrow at him.

     “Yeah, the one right over here.” He says and points to it.

     “Is it locked?” You ask.

     “No,” Pearl glances towards the bathroom door and crosses her arms. “The lock has been broken on it for a while, since Peridot joined us actually. Both Garnet and I tried opening it, but I think once Spinel hears someone trying to come in she blocks the door.”

     Hm.

     “I’m gonna try something, but you guys are gonna wanna stay away.” You say to the two of them. “I don’t want to overwhelm her with more than one person.”

     “Let us know if we can do anything?” Steven makes to pass by you and gives your arm a light squeeze. “And thanks for coming to help.”

     “Anytime, dude.” You give him a half smile, and walk over to his bathroom. You turn to take a look back at the other two, and they’re already in the kitchen discussing something in soft tones. You move to knock at the door, make two light taps against the frame, and wait for an answer.

     A couple seconds pass, and nothing. Not even any movement. Nervously, you knock again, a little louder this time, and wait for a good ten seconds.

     Still nothing.

     You take a deep breath, reach out to grab the door handle, and very slowly and quietly open the bathroom door. You see nothing but absolute darkness, and step in. You feel around the wall to your right and flip a switch just as you close the door behind you with an audible click. The room instantly floods with the dark red light of the heat lamp, and before you can even think about finding another light source, you find yourself slammed up against the wall and let out a surprised yelp. You open your eyes to see Spinel’s face inches from yours, pupils wild, her hands splayed against your shoulders.

     “U-um,” Your voice cracks a little. “Hey.”

     You watch her eyes take a second to find yours, and almost instantly, she lets you go, arms trembling.

     “W.. what are YOU DOING HERE!?” She cries, large tears pouring down her face, eyebrows raised in confusion, mouth trembling. Her hair is in loose pigtails, strands untamed around her face, cheeks stained with tear tracks. She looks like a mess, and your heart breaks, just a little. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt y-”

     “I’m fine.” You cut her off. “I should have said who it was outside the door, I’m sorry. And um.. Steven texted me while I was at work, and told me what was going on so I rushed over..” You trail off as you watch Spinel’s entire body shake, and she covers her face with both of her hands.

     “I can’t believe I just did that.” You hear her wavering voice, muffled behind her fists, and she lets out a choked sob. “Maybe they were right. M-maybe I’m not meant to-” She quickly moves her hands down to look at the floor with wide, vulnerable eyes, and struggles to form the rest of her words. You hear her breathing pick up pace, and you’re starting to realize she’s hyperventilating.

     “Spinel, look at me.” Her eyes shoot up to yours, lips trembling. “I need you to breathe.” You do what your friends have always done with you, and gently grab both of her hands and hold them with yours, thumbs stroking her palms in slow circles. She freezes up instantly, and you’re about to panic, because while a familiar touch helps ground you, you register that maybe it’ll make it worse for her. But before you can pull your hands away, her hands relax ever so slightly, and she lets out a shaky breath. “Good. Just like that.” You motion for her to follow your breathing inverals, and she copies you, hands still shaking in yours.

     It’s been a while since you’ve had to deal with something like this, but you’re thankful for having similar life experiences. After a solid minute or two of this her breathing is back to a normal pace, but she’s still crying, and now not meeting your eyes. Almost like she’s avoiding them.

     “Look, I.. I don’t know what happened with you and the diamonds, but you can talk to me about it if you’d like. No pressure, though.” You give her hands a small squeeze, and she whimpers, looking up to meet your gaze. Tears are still actively streaming down her face, and you have no idea how to make any of this better. It physically hurts you to see her like this.

     “C-can I not talk about it? I don’t think I’m ready..” She pulls a hand from yours, and wipes at her face. She just kind of smeared half of her face with wetness, and she looks miserable.

     “You don’t have to talk about anything, Spinel.” You look at her, making sure she sees it in your eyes. You slowly let go of her other hand, and hold your arms out in a silent question instead. Her mouth opens slightly, the red glow of the light around her making her look extremely vulnerable and soft, and she looks at your open arms with a blank face for a moment before understanding. Almost instantaneously, she throws herself against you and wraps her arms around your shoulders, shoving her face into the cradle of your neck. You envelop your arms around her tightly, giving her sides a squeeze, and you feel her start to shake again.

     She lets out an unsteady sigh, and hiccups out another small sob. You pull her to lean fully against you as you stand there, bracing your back against the bathroom door. She lets you maneuver her, and you rest the side of your face against her temple while she cries. You resign yourself to letting her cry on you until she’s done, if she needs to.

       You feel her sniffle against your neck, and try not to mind that she’s getting your shirt soaked. You give her back a few gentle rubs, feeling her body quiver against yours as she’s trying to control her choked breathing. You’re not really counting the minutes, as right now you’re currently having way too many rampant thoughts about what the fuck the diamonds could’ve said to her. You’re mad as hell, honestly, and if you could say shit to them, you would in a heartbeat. You don’t want to make anything worse for her though, as much as you want to steal her phone and video call them to curse them out. It takes a few more minutes, but eventually her crying dies down, and you feel her breathing even out. Slowly, she dislodges her arms from twisting around you two, and you feel a sigh, her breath hot against your neck. You do your best to school your facial expression as you’re realize just how close you are to her, and she pulls her face from its resting position to look at you. She looks awful.

       “U-um,” She lifts up her hand to attempt to wipe her face, failing to rub half the tears away. “I don’t really want to go out there yet..”

       “You don’t have to.” You say, quietly. “I can leave if you’d like some quiet to yourself.” Her face looks panicked for a second, and she grabs your wrist.

       “Please don’t leave me.” She says, voice wavering again. You try not to let your heart shatter at her tone.

     “I won’t if you want me here.” You say, and sigh softly. “Here, hold on a second.”

     She lets your wrist go as you move slightly over to the sink, turn the hot water on, and grab a clean hand towel from the counter. You soak it in water, and squeeze out all the excess. Towel in hand, you turn back to her, and she’s looking at you cautiously. You lift the towel slightly, motioning to her face.

     “May I?” You ask, and she nods slightly.

     Tenderly, you brush a couple strands of hair away from her face, grasp her chin with your left hand and pull her forward, gently pressing the towel to her cheek. She closes her eyes, and her shoulders sag a little as she lets you dab at her face, cleaning her of any tear stain marks. She sighs into your touch, and it strikes you that it would be so easy to just.. lean in and kiss her.

       Your brain almost short circuits and you snap your thoughts back to reality. There’s a time and place for everything. This is not the time, nor the place.

       Once you’re satisfied that she looks a lot better than before, you pull your hands away to toss the rag in the sink, and Spinel, for a brief moment, looks disappointed that you had stopped. Which.. kind of gives you an idea.

       “Can I try something? Harper used to do this thing with me when I.. had similar breakdowns.” You ask her. She raises her eyebrow in response, clearly exhausted from crying so much. “Here.” You say, and take her hand and lead her over to the rim of the bathtub. You sit down on the edge, and motion for her to sit in front of you on the floor. She takes a seat in front of you, still confused, but obeys nonetheless. “Can I touch you?” You ask her, watching her face to make sure she’s alright.

       She looks up at you, the red light in the room flooding the entirety of her face, making her hair darker, and the whites of her eyes a bit more dramatic.

     “Yeah.” She says in reply, voice tired.

     You reach out to her hair, and stop for a moment.

     “Can I have you face the other direction, actually? Come over here.” You move to open your knees, making enough room for Spinel to turn around and lean against the bathtub. She’s close to you again.

     “What are you..” She trails off as you start to take the hair ties out of her pigtails, one after the other. It takes a second, as it’s a bit tangled, but you manage to get both out, and let her hair fall down. You comb out her hair with your fingers, gently, and she sighs audibly while leaning into your touch. You run your short nails along her scalp, scratching and massaging as you smooth out her hair, attempting to pull all the tangles out.

     “Touch used to calm me down, and Harper was really good at it, honestly.” You say while pulling out a particularly difficult tangle without hurting her. Her hair is long like this, and you like it. You wish you could grow your hair this long, but it’s kind of a pain to deal with, and the longest you’ve ever had yours wasn’t even to your mid back, you think to yourself. “Sometimes she’d give me shoulder and neck massages, but I preferred that she’d just play with my hair. There’s just something different about another person touching your hair.”

     “I kind of get what you mean.” She says, tiredly.

     “Can I braid your hair?” You lean closer to look at her face.

     “Do what you want.” She says, looking fairly relaxed.

     “Cool. Anyway, while Harper was good at that, Alex, on the other hand, was just terrible at any kind of physical comfort. He’s genuine, and he tries, but he’s an idiot. He’s a lot better at distractions, for the most part.” You run your fingers through her hair one more time, before starting to separate her hair into three parts for a french braid. “He’s funny, and comes from a large family, so he always has stories and jokes. Whenever I’d have a panic attack, those two were always so good about being there for me. I don’t know what I’d do without them.”

     You notice that Spinel‘s shoulders have lost most of the tension in them, and you’re secretly relieved. You keep talking to fill the quietness around you two, because you’ve always hated the quiet during moments like these. Your friends aren’t here, so it’s up to you to make up for it.

     “It was kind of hard, at first though,” You say, and start looping the chunks of hair around your fingers, starting at the top of her head. “Because for a while there, back when I was 16 and dealing with the worst of my abandonment issues, I clung onto Harper like a baby koala. I had this super weird crush on her even though we had been friends since we were practically babies. I think I idolized her because she was just.. good to me.” You accidentally tug a little too hard on a strand of hair, wince and utter an apology while massaging the spot on her scalp. “I’m glad that didn’t ruin our friendship, but for a while there I really pushed my feelings onto her, which was kinda fucked up on my part.”

     “Hm..” Spinel mumbles. “I kind of had a thing for Pink, I think. Which ended up screwing with me even more after what she did.” You stare at the back of her head and pause your hands for a second. Huh. Yeah, you had a hunch.

     “If she were still alive, I’d punch her in the face for you, I hope you know.” You state, in full seriousness. This gets the first chuckle that you’ve heard from her today, and you’re secretly overjoyed.

     “I’d pay to watch that.” She says, and you laugh out loud. You see her smile, just barely.

     “So,” You continue, with both your hands and conversation. “A week or so after my 17th birthday, right after Harper talked to me about this guy at school that she liked, I confess to her. And not like a, ‘oh hey, you’re my best friend and I really like you’ kind of way, either. It was more like a, ‘have a mental breakdown over your best friend liking someone else and make them feel like shit about it on your walk home from school’ kind of confession.” Your hands reach the nape of her neck now, braid mostly done on her head, but you’ve got around another 20 inches of length before being finished.

     “Harper avoided me for nearly a week after that. I was absolutely pathetic, and inconsolable. Alex was fed up with my shit after a few days, and nearly slapped me over it. He would’ve been in the right, doing so, honestly. I was a selfish asshole who only thought about her own feelings, and not about her best friends.” Your eyes drift to Spinel’s face, and her eyes are closed, eyebrows unfurrowed.

     “Anyway,” You’re nearly done with the entire braid now. “She did end up forgiving me. Thankfully. I don’t know what I’d do if it were my fault that I’d split up our friend group.” You pick up the discarded hair tie from earlier, and tie it around the end of the braid.

     “I’m all done, by the way.” You say to her. She opens her eyes tentatively, and she looks sleepy. You stand up, and stretch your back. She also gets up on wobbly legs, and turns to look at you.

     “Um.” She’s avoiding your eyes. “Thank you. For this.” She’s twisting her hands together, nervously. You lean your face closer to get at eye-level with her.

     “Anytime.. and for the record, you look really cute in a braid.” You say and smile, giving her a cheeky wink. You watch her entire face from the neck up turn bright red, and think that you could probably do this forever, and never get tired. She gives you a noncommittal grunt, halfheartedly smacks your arm and you grin at her.

     You hear a quiet knock at the door, and look over to Spinel. She shrugs, so I guess it’s okay now.

     “You can come in!” You say to the door. It opens slowly, and you see Steven peek his head in.

     “Um.. are we okay?” He asks, clearly very worried about her.

     “I’ll be okay.” She says, and you think that maybe she should lay down and sleep. You verbalize this immediately.

     “Spinel. I think you should go take a nap.” You look at her, and she blinks at you. “I’m serious.”

     “She’s kind of right.” Steven says in agreement with you. Spinel gives the both of you a shrug, and even that seems like it’s taking a lot out of her.

     “Okay.” She says, and turns to walk out of the bathroom. Steven opens the door wider, and you can see Pearl in the kitchen leaning against the counter, trying to not seem like she’s intently watching all of you.

     Spinel makes her way over to the couch and takes a seat, sitting up rigidly. You walk over to her to make sure she’s okay before you leave for home.

     “You know you can text me, right? And if you need me, I’ll be available. I’ll leave my volume turned on.” She gives you a nod. “Oh, and.. take this,” You say, and pull off the pullover hoodie you’re wearing right now, and hand it over to her. “Alex used to let me wear his oversized sweaters, and they used to help me sleep, so..”

     She tentatively reaches out, and takes it from your hands.

     “Thanks.” She says, and gives you a small smile. With her hair pulled back like this she almost looks human, for a fleeting moment. You sometimes forget she’s a gem. You return the smile back at her, and turn around to leave.

     After grabbing your bag that you set down earlier from beside the couch, you head over to the front door and open it. Shouldering the bag, you start to shut the door and see Steven behind you. He closes the door behind him, his face searching yours for something you don’t quite know.

     “I don’t know what you did, but thank you.” He says, completely genuine.

     “You don’t have to thank me. I’d do it for you, too, you know.” You say to him, and he smiles.

     “That’s why I like you, Y/N. You’re sweet.”

     “Yeahhhh, don’t tell anyone, though. You’ll ruin my reputation.” You smirk, giving him the side-eye. He laughs and pats your back.

     “Ohhhhhh no! Whatever will you do!?” He rolls his eyes in jest. “Get home safe, okay?”

     “No promises.” You reply, and jump down his steps, two at a time.  

     It doesn’t take you long to get home, and you’re pretty tired yourself. You make yourself busy by preparing dinner, cleaning the kitchen a little, and calling your dad for another check-in. Before you know it, it’s nearly 11, and you need to sleep for your double shift tomorrow that you almost forgot about. You’re laying in bed browsing social media before drifting off, and you receive a text from Spinel. You swipe down and open the message.

         Spinel: Thanks again for today.

     Spinel: I baked some new cookies with Steven, and would like to give you some tomorrow if that’s okay?

         You smile to yourself. Ughhhhhhhh, you’re catching the feelings disease, and you swat the air around you like it somehow physically manifested around you.

         Y/N: I work literally all day, but feel free to stop by and give them to me.

     Y/N: Then I get to see a pretty familiar face to break up all the lame tourists.

     Y/N: Cuz that sounds super nice. ;)

     Spinel: I’ll see you tomorrow, then.

         She didn’t react to your obvious teasing, but you won’t let that discourage you. You fall asleep thinking of the many different ways you can poke fun at her, and this time, you charge your phone.

     You wake up the next morning feeling well-rested for once, and get ready for work. Alex has sent you a couple texts about when his flight will arrive, and when he’ll roughly come to meet you. Sometime around 4pm, apparently. You shoot Spinel a good morning text, and she replies almost instantly with the same, which makes you smile.

     You head to work, texting your group chat about what happened yesterday with Spinel, and give them basically all the details. Alex makes fun of you for a bit, so you curse him out and pocket your phone as you clock in. Today’s going to suck, but you’ve got a few things to look forward to.

     You make it a couple hours into your shift before you finally get a break, and Spinel texts you that she’ll drop by sometime in the afternoon once she’s done helping Bismuth with something. God you hope it’s not when Alex gets here, because you are so not fucking ready for that interaction. You eat your lunch and pray to any god out there that you could have one more day of peace.

     You’re outside the main building repairing a couple parts on the carousel, ignoring the bulk of the tourists to focus on work. You don’t realize that quite a while has passed by, because someone walks up to you as you’ve got your head in a small door, and kicks you slightly on your ass. You jolt and bump your head against the opening, and you hear Alex burst out into laughter as you groan in pain.

     God fucking dammit, this guy. You pull your head out to glare at him, screwdriver pointing at him threateningly.

     “Do you want this up your ass? Because I can do that.” You say to him, and he laughs even harder. You roll your eyes at him.

     “Don’t promise me with a good time, Y/N.” He says, and you stand up to smack him.

     “I don’t think the pointy end would be a good time, idiot.” You deadpan stare at him. He grins.

     “You don’t know what I’m into.” He shrugs, and flips his hair dramatically. You hate that he’s stupid and charming, and you love him so much.

     “I know I haven’t seen you in 2 months, but like, I feel like you’ve grown taller?” You stare at him, a little mournfully. You’re the shortest one out of your friends, and you’re of average height. He also seems.. handsomer. You think he definitely got a lot more tan. He’s definitely grown into his looks, his dark curly hair and recently shaved face making him look older than you’re used to.

     “I don’t think I did, but I think you’ve grown shorter.” He laughs obnoxiously, and you smack his arm again, which makes him laugh harder.

     “You’re so mean to me, like all the time. Why do I love you?” You cross your arms and pout, because you know it gets a rise out of him.

     “Youuuuuuu knowww, because I’m just so loveable and gorgeous and the smartest one in the group??” He flutters his eyelashes at you like he thinks he’s cute.

     “Wow, you are none of these things.” You reply, smirking at him. He puts his hand over his heart in mock offense.

     “Y/N, I’m offended. I’ve been here for like, five minutes, and I’ve received absolutely no affection from you. If I don’t get love, I will wilt and die. Do you want to be responsible for my death?” He opens his arms wide, and you roll your eyes dramatically, and stand there.

     “We’re not doing this in public.” You say, standing your ground.

     “Ohhh, YES we are, Y/N.” He wiggles his eyebrows. “Prepare yourself for the onslaught.”

     You take a couple steps back, prepared to run. He grabs your arms, wraps his around your torso, and picks you up, swinging you around.

     “Nooooooooooooooooo!!” You cry. “Put me down you oaf!”

     “No! I want love!” He all but shouts, and spins you around. He grabs your cheek with one hand and starts giving you big ‘ol smooches all over your face, and you’re giggling and trying to push him away, when you hear something drop and spill on the pavement a good twenty feet from you. You look up.

     It’s Spinel.

       Her face is twisted with heartbreak, and before you can even speak up, she bolts.

       You look down, and see the cookies she made you scattered on the ground.

[aliceellablog]

Holiyay?

*08/10/17*

Sorry I haven’t posted for so long... ironic when you’re not well enough to write your blog about your illness aint it!?! 

Anyway, I’m gonna cut right to the chase. Instagram vs real life is such an issue for me. One I probably need to get over…. It’s so hard I don’t know wether I should try and only post positive fun photos and make it look like I’m having a right old great fucking time or to keep it more ‘real’? But then no-one wants to see pics of an ill sad girl and it’ll probably just look like I’m trying to get attention.

I guess this blog is my outlet for now…

I have people who are close to me who tell me that if I post about being ill all the time I’ll never get booked for work or gigs, but then when it comes to my (failing) career as an artist I want to be real. I want to be honest and build a genuine following of people who care enough to join me on the real journey??Answers on a postcard please thanks.

So if you’ve seen the recent Insta posts you will have seen that I managed to go on holiday with my besets friends - genuine yay!I’ve never been away with friends before and could not wait to get ma body in the sun!! Oh that sweet sweet vitamin D!

But maybe I underestimated how tiring travelling was and how hard it would be…

Don’t get me wrong I don’t regret going and there were some really genuinely lovely times - that and I feel so much closer to my friends, but I’ve been back home now for three weeks and I’m just about making it to the supermarket or doing small tasks around the house each day. BIG FAT MEH.

I know I say it a lot but M.E. is so fucking frustrating!!! Because the more you push through and try and go for it the worse you get, so you physically can’t just get on with things- and the pay back is hell.

So on the way there we had the biggest nightmare…. I met Katie, Grace, Tilly, and Nicki at the airport and all was chill- I was feeling pretty shit but not too terrible. We had a bit of food at the Wetherspoons - keeping it classy - and then all went off to get out bits and bobs from Boots, WHSmiths etc - classic airport essentials!! - now… I’ll spare you the details… but I also have Crohns disease, and was not tooooo well!! It seemed that all of a sudden our gate was called… and I was… erm… busy…

I was as quick as I could be (awks), but there is no rushing somethings man!!! We were all panicking on the WhatsApp group and I told the gals I would meet them at the gate… Grace (bless her heart) said she would wait for me - she went to the information desk and told them my situation and asked if we could get a wheelchair or one of those buggy things to assist us to the gate - which of course was the furthest one away!!!

Do you know what they said to her??

‘You have four minutes until the gate closes and you won’t get there in time. You have to go now and leave your friend’ Grace being Grace said no, and waited for me. She tried to explain but they said to her ‘If she’s ill she shouldn’t be travelling’ - THANKS GATWICK - REAL BIG HELP THERE!!

Anyway… I came out of the toilets (why oh why am I selling you all this hahahaha) and found Grace - we had less than 4 minutes to do like a good 10 minute walk.

I don’t think I’ve moved so fast in a long time!! We were proper power walking through the airport and Grace would break into a jog at some points. I was fast trailing behind her shouting ‘just go!’ ‘Go on without me!’ Which of course she didn’t….

Stress levels were ridiculous, and I almost collapsed on an escalator - I sat and G rubbed my back…. After what seemed like a marathon we got to the gate… where everyone was sat chilling and they hadn’t even stared boarding yet. cool. whatever… Then Tilly comes walking up behind us as my body is shaking and I start to cry from all the adrenaline- ‘oh hey guys! you got here quick!’ - yea Tilly… real quick….LOL

By that time my legs were utter jelly and I thought I was going to pass out - very pleasant- but we all got on the plane and were laughing so hard at the messages of sheer panic in the WhatsApp group! We were all SO RELIEVED that we had made it!! I literally thought I had ruined everyone’s holiday!! - oops!! Never eating before a flight again! ;)

So we got to Spain and yet again the airport staff were assholes - I was as you can imagine feeling awful and there was a huge queue to get through passport control- I had my disabled parking badge with me as way of proof (people look at me and just don’t get it) and so Kaite and I asked if there was any where I could sit to wait for the queue to go down or any way we could go to the front. After they’d asked ‘where is the disabled girl?’ looking straight past me, and told me no, we’d had enough and just walked straight through while they shouted ‘Policia’ at us etc…. Luckily the police did not come and we went straight through!

What is it with these people?? Like even if I was a healthy girl who became ill on the plane they should WANT to help someone who is asking for assistance??

They can all get in the bin. End of.

So next was the drive (thank you Nicki for driving on the other side of the road for us all!!) to the villa and then we were there! Bloody exhausting.

The gals all then went out for dinner and I went to bed and ate a gluten free pot noodle I had packed in ma suitcase. Living the dream I tell ya!

The next day I was feeling pretty awful and chilled all day by the pool - now of course I am not complaining as I am so lucky to have been able to go on holiday at all, but that day, and most of the time actually, it was just a massive head fuck.

How was I was sat by the pool, surrounded by palm trees in the gorgeous sun, yet all I felt like doing was crying. I couldn’t shake it.

I didn’t want to be with my friends and I didn’t have the energy to make conversation, but kept trying and didn’t want to ruin everyone else’s holiday or be a downer.

Some of the time it just felt I was like having salt rubbed in my wounds right in my face. I was surrounded by four other healthy girls doing what I wished I could be.

I guess at home where I can escape to my room, and the fact that they are all at work everyday, it’s a little easier to cope.

But watching them all have fun and go out without me, and drink wine every night etc. was just a bit rubbish I guess.

I’m sure I sound ridiculous but you can’t help what you feel, and that’s what I felt.

The second night I went for dinner with them all but got so unwell I was in tears at the dinner table and got a cab home and left them to it. Fuck sake. (Sorry for all the swearing… just feel strongly lol)

I did improve a bit as the holiday went on, and my god they were all SO helpful and caring - always carrying the sun lounger out to the pool for me, and making me food when I was super tired (great omelette’s Nix!!), taking my suitcase for me at the airport, all that kinda stuff - and for that I thank them all, I must have been such a burden always having to be ‘looked after’ and I hated that. But they were beyond wonderful. Love you all SO MUCH!!

Then Emily arrived for the last few days which was awesome as we don’t get to see her as much now she’s moved out- so that was cool and we had a really lovely day at the beach which I genuinely enjoyed and did feel a little better - oh and I got duck pancakes that day too… nuff said!! :)

On the Saturday we had decided to have our one ‘night out’ -it was really nice to all get dolled up and as most of us are single now there was a lot of banter with the bar staff etc!

But again I was there drinking a Diet Coke and they were there making bloody boomerangs of them cheersing with their champagne glasses and getting drunk. God I am bitter!! hahaha

How do I always end up writing about my long to get drunk on this blog haha…. I just really miss it I guess… It’s hard cos my personality is so full of get up and go and lets go get drunk and dance!!! But instead I get to a club, can’t drink and all I think about is where can I sit down and what time shall I get a cab home on my own.

Wow… I really can complain huh!!!

On a positive note- I did have a dance that night!! Ok it was for maybe like 2 songs and it was more of a side step LOL but it felt really good! … and again…. Bar staff were on fleeek - for a laugh Nicki and I went up and she dared me to ask for his number… which I did…he was like the most gorgeous man I had ever seen!! But he had to get a woman over to translate as he didn’t understand a word I was saying and then when he did give me his number he asked if I spoke Spanish… to which I said no…. Most pointless exchange ever but Nicki and I were dying laughing and then just kinda ran away! I felt 13 again!

Then Grace did a high kick on the dance floor and fell flat on her face - and got glass in her hand. Doh! Oh Grace- your dance moves make me so happy- man I wish I could do crying laughing emojis on here!!!

-Don’t worry, Grace got looked after! After being told she would need stitches by the bar staff, she ended up in A&E but came home a mere plaster

Anyway I am rambling now -

After that night again I felt terrible and didn’t make it out to dinner with the gals but was glad I had made it out in the first place. I sat and ate chocolate watching the sunset instead. All good ;)

Then the journey home of course was pretty rubbish - British Airways you suck balls. - We pre booked assistance on the way home after our first ordeal! But this then meant waiting on the (very cold) plane for another half an hour, then being wheeled to a dark hallway and being left sat there alone (no staff anywhere) for about 45 minutes. We got so fed up that Katie found a few wheelchairs and stole one- I mean if they’re not gonna help we will help ourselves… it was at that moment that the buggy arrived and faffed about for a long time and then took us through passport control etc. LONG. Would have probably been less tiring to walk but then you never know how far it is!

After hitting my head at the train station I arrived home to Sussex where my mum picked me up.

Then HOME!! Oh the joy!! Bed with my cat! YAAAASSSS!!!

Unfortunately the next day I had hospital in the morning but it was to see a consultant I’ve been waiting forever to see who is giving me a trail of some new medication.

I don’t want to get my hopes up so am trying not to think about it but my god I am PRAYING that it might just help! - I’ll let ya know ;)

So now that I am back in London I am back to trying to do small realistic tasks each day and build back up from there. It’s depressing. It’s frustrating. It’s lonely. But it has to be done.

Much love for anyone who has actually read that!!! Means so much and am just trying to turn a negative into a positive - I enjoy writing this and hope that someone in a similar situation might be able to relate, and that someone who has never heard of M.E. might gain a little understanding.

Please get in touch if you wanna chat :)

My website: www.aliceella.com

Insta: @aliceellagram

MWAH x

[chariotdunord]

tagged by @fyorahime!

boy is this a long tag thingy but I felt like doing it~

1. do you have a good relationship with your parents? yup. sometimes there’s some things that my mom does that I don’t completely agree with but otherwise we get along really well

2. who did you last say “i love you” to? friends on the discord group

3. do you regret anything? yes some, and I have 2 big ones in my life. one of them is not keeping my native chinese, and the other is well... pretty personal

4. are you insecure? eh, kind of. i’m confident enough not to ever fall into low self-esteem pits much, but insecure enough to doubt a lot of my own abilities a lot

5. what is your relationship status? single pringle

6. how do you want to die? quietly in my sleep, surrounded by love ones.

7. what did you last eat? a snow cone!! it was so good

8. played any sports? I did martial arts in high school

9. do you bite your nails? no but I do pick at them a lot 10. when was your last physical fight? never had one

11. do you like someone? ... maybe

12. have you ever stayed up 48 hours? nope

13. do you hate anyone at the moment? not really

14. do you miss someone? I kinda miss my brother, who’s at school for the summer

15. have any pets? a little dog named chloe back home but she’s not really mine per se

16. how exactly are you feeling at the moment? moderately happy, talking with the discord friends

17. ever made out in the bathroom? haha yes apparently it has to be public restrooms? lol

18. are you scared of spiders? very much

19. would you go back in time if given the chance? probably just to relive some memories, take some pictures

20. last place you made out with someone? don’t even remember

21. what are your plans for this weekend? die from the new little witch episode cus chariot finally reveals herself

22. do you want kids? how many? only if my spouse wants kids! if so then I’d want 2

23. do you have piercings? how many? none

24. what is/are your best subjects? if I were taking any foreign language classes I’m sure those would be, but anyway I do best in my physics classes

25. do you miss anyone from your past? oooooh boy yes quite a few

26. what are you craving rn? motivation to do work

27. have you ever broken someones heart? I think so... and I am very sorry about it now

28. have you ever been cheated on? I don’t think so

29. have you ever made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? ....yeah. again I’m sorry about it now

30. whats irritating rn? my sister keeps asking for bread (she’s an IRL honoka I swear) but I keep telling her she just can’t keep eating bread and she has to eat other things and she keeps eating snacks and so doesn’t have enough room in her tummy for a proper dinner sometimes and >.> I’M TRYIng... to take cARE OF YOU... !!

31. does someone love you? some of my friends tell me they love me regularly... it’s a nice thing ^///^

32. what is your favorite color? blue! lately though I’ve been really liking red

33. do you have trust issues? nah buddy if anything I trust too easily

34. who/what was your last dream about? I never remember any of my dreams anymore man I haven’t remembered a dream waking up in like... months

35. who was the last person you cried in front of? my brother I think?

36. do you give out second chances too easily? I don’t know... maybe?

37. is it easier to forgive or forget? for me it’s easier to forgive. my memory’s too good 38. is this year the best year of your life? well... it’s been pretty darn good so far!

39. how old were you when you had your first kiss? uuuuhhh I think I was 16

40. have you ever walked outside completely naked? lol whut no

(looks like 41-50 is gone *shrug emoji*)

51. favorite food? CANDY!! AND FRUIT!!

52. do you believe everything happens for a reason? yes I do

53. what was the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? read a fic

54. is cheating ever okay? no

55. are you mean? gosh I hope not, I do my best

56. have you ever been in a fist fight? nah

57. do you believe in true love? haha yes I do ^^

58. favorite weather? slightly cloudy, between 50-78 degrees, no wind

59. do you like the snow? I LOVE the snow I think it’s beautiful

60. do you wanna get married? yes please

61. is it cute when a girl/boy calls you baby? no it kinda makes me uncomfortable

62. what makes you happy? my daughters honoka, lucina, tsubasa, seeing people loving chariot, spending time with my friends, good snacks/candy and fruit, learning about cool things

65. your bff of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? I’d have to think about it for a bit

66. do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? I have a lot

67. who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? discord friend

68. who is the last person you had a deep conversation with? probably my brother if it’s about myself... otherwise a discord friend

69. do you believe in soulmates? I think... who we end up with (if we even do at all) is determined but there isn’t a thing as soulmates

70. is there anyone you’d die for? any of my immediate family members, a few close friends

uuhhh I know this is long but @hatsune-miku-was-here, @theneonflower, @rose-of-the-wind, @theaceofgays, only if y’all want to!!! <3

[colourline]

15 ways to take care of yourself through the winter depression + a Spotify-playlist

If you're living in the northern part of the world like me, you're in the winter season which also means a lot less daylight. For some, this means that the mood sometimes drops a few levels.. and then it's extra important to be gentle and patient with yourself.  Someone I know who struggles with winter depression reached out to me and asked for some advice or things to do when the winter depression is sneaking up on us. I thought she probably wasn't the only one going through this. I know what depression can feel like, but again depression feels different to different people, but I've written some things I know have either helped me or others. And even if you're not a sufferer, we all need some self-care now and then.  There are different things that work for different kind of people. One thing can be a stress-factor for some and a stress-reliever for others. Find what works for you. Our bodies and minds respond differently to different things..

Here are some ways you can take extra good care of yourself this winter.. 

 Check in with yourself. I received an advice ones, she told me that every morning before she went out of bed, she would ask herself what she had the energy to do that day. She would really check in with herself and be honest. This may take some practice, especially if you have ignored your feelings and body's needs for a long time. The less you've taken care of yourselves, the less you probably have the energy to do, but the more you practise self-care the better your body will feel. Some days don't have the energy to plan a week ahead, some days it's enough just "planning" the day in front of you. Some days it's necessary to take one day at a time. And that's o k a y .   

Eat breakfast in bed. Some days it's just too much to leave bed, but it can also make us feel even more hopeless. Why not make your own little shelter in bed. Camp there. Bring a cup of tea (the bigger the cup the better). Sometimes I feel good enough to do some "work" (like writing a blog post) in bed. Other times all I can do is read a book or watch Netflix (but let's be mindful of what we watch, sometimes what we watch make us feel even worse about ourselves). Again, it all depends on what we need. No shame in staying in bed. ;)  

Organise your Pinterest boards. Okay okay, listen.. for some this can feel like a totally unnecessary chore, if so.. then don't! BUT if you're like me and you like organising (bonus: while looking at pretty pictures) then I've found this is perfect for me! I still feel somehow productive and cleaning out old pins actually makes me feel a little better. It's always good cleaning out. On my Pinterest boards whenever I need inspiration, and then I always appreciate that I cleaned up (it's also interesting to see how your personal style & taste develops over time, I should totally write a blogpost about that some time!) and Pinterest's algorithms will know better what to show you.  

Pin some quotes. ..talking about Pinterest, when I burned out last year I dedicated a whole Pinterest board to self-care. It's called // care, love + grow yourself and I'll link to it right here. So if you're in need of some self-affirmation, good quotes or just wanna read something encouraging - check it out and pin away!  

Occupy your mind. I'm all about feeling your feelings and give yourself time to listen to what your heart is telling you aka. not pretending like you don't have feelings, BUT there are times when the mind just won't shut up. I usually explain it as "a war in my head". Now, you only know yourself if you're just avoiding your own feelings, please don't do that, eventually, they will find a way out. When all that is said, I have days when my anxiety is sky-high and my depression keeps re-playing "the-bad-memories-movie" to me. And no matter how many times I try to think about something else, it just doesn't work. It keeps screaming. Music doesn't even work for me on those days. It just brings up even more memories, weird situations or dramas that doesn't even exist. If you've struggled with your mental health, I'm sure some of this sounds familiar. On days like this, I try to distract my brain so that I drown the war going on in there. But as always, there can be good and bad ways of doing that. When I'm feeling like this I like listening to a podcast, reading, writing, declaring, watching something I enjoy, makes me laugh or fills me with inspiration.  

Listen to podcasts. When music doesn't work for me, a podcast does. Then I'm focusing on someone else's voice. Or an audiobook if you're into that. And I can either learn something new, be inspired or enjoy some good entertainment.  

Read. If you can focus enough, then read. A book (check my recommendations: "Stuff that shaped me"), a magazine, a blog, some old cards or maybe a dairy from your childhood. I've found that whenever I enter into another world my minds get occupied, just great! Or if I find a blog I really like, I keep on finding new blogposts I wanna read (I recommend Ashley Morgan Jackson and A Girl Named Leney). When all that is said, even though I love to read, sometimes I just can't. I just get too distracted all the time.. and then I forget where I left and you know.. It's better to stop and do something else for a while.  

Write. Write something. It's a good way to get feelings out of your system. Or just get down on paper all the things swirling around in your head. If it's about a person, write them a letter and burn it.. or hide it, it's up to you. I actually wrote a letter to someone. I was tired of hearing their judging comments in my mind and needed it to stop. It actually helped me - I even shared it with you. Go leave a nice comment on someone's instagram post. We can all use some love. And what a beautiful thing it is to be supportive of others. Or maybe write a song? It works for the brilliant songwriters like Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran. Let me make it a cliche, write your heart out.  

Watch. Your favourite YouTubers. Or a great movie (May I recommend The Shack? This is an affiliate link, but 100% my opinion) If I need to focus on happier things I either go to my Pinterest board dedicated to The Cat Family. Cats always make me happy. There are so many photos, memes, videos.. may I recommend videos of cats getting scared of cucumbers for an instant laugh?! They're always a joy watching. Especially when you live a place where you're not allowed pets. If you like some food for your mind I also made a playlist out of my favourite bodypositive & mental health videos.  

Talk to someone. Skype a friend who lives far away. Call your parents or grandparents. Sometimes when we feel lonely or a bit sad is because we simply haven't spoken to a living human being.  

Fingerpaint. I know it sounds like something a kindergarten would do, but getting all the tools away and litereally using your body, your hand, your fingers to *smoosh* out the paint. Feel the texture. Play around. Let go of all the pressure to create something pretty. Use some colours that fit your mood and make those fingers work!  

Create a "hygge" atmosphere. It's actually gramatically incorrect, it should say "hyggelig", but since it's the noun version that's taken the world by storm, and probably the only one you recognize then I'll be a little gramatically incorrect, just for you, haha. I actually created a Pinterest board (has the fact that I'm a Pinterest freak sinked in yet? #noshame) it's called hygge by a danish girl. Yes I'm danish. I'm born in the country of hygge; Denmark. Any other danes out there? If you check out the board, you'll know it's the real deal ;) Anyways, whenever I'm feeling a bit weird or in need of some mood-boosters. I put on some of my favourite music, I light up al the candles, I mean ALL the candles, I'll find more if I need too. Make myself a hot cup of tea with milk! I might even make myself a little snack platter with whatever I find like some fruit slices, buiscuits, candy, some yoghurt with müsli.. you name it. Bring out your favourites and when you display it all on a plate it looks fancier, feels more luxurious and might even taste better (no promises). A blanket. Depending on what you need or want you can bring over a friend, a pet, a little brother, a book, a movie.. you name it, but creating a hygge-atmosphere can make it feel more homely. And a nice treat for ourselves. Sometimes just doing something for ourselves can make us feel better. 

Listen to some upbuilding music. I don't think it's a secret that music can make us feel things and we can resonate with the words. As promised in the title, I created a spotify-playlist filled with songs that bring hope, bring courage, take away fear and makes us feel less alone or makes us wanna change the world. It's called Fight for yourself-playlists. I believe the words we say and listen to effects us more than we know. I try my best to fill my playlists with good music - especially lyric wise. There's a lot of lyrics filled with destructive thinking, not honourable and disrespectful behaviour, not to mention words I'd never say out loud.  Feel free to share the playlist! (will continue to update it, so send me your suggestions!)

Create a self-care-box. Or feel-good-box. Whatever you wanna call it. Fill it with nice things. Like letters and cards you appreciate, cute notes, maybe your favourite perfume, some good-smelling soap, photos of people that make you smile, some nostalgic things from your childhood, your favourite snack (check the expiration date first!), some dried flowers, facemasks, a good hand cream, maybe even some scrubs, things that make you smile, feel better and taken care of.. you name it. I even have a album with screenshots on my phone of every time I receive a message or nice comment I wanna remember. I call it my happy album, with lots of emojis. One can never have too many emojis.  

Paint your nails & wear some lipstick. What nonsense. You serious? Yes. I've sometimes felt a bit of shame if I used "too much" time in front of a mirror, but you know what? I've found that when I've played around with some makeup, I've actually enjoyed myself. I've used time on me. I took care of me, myself and I. Even if I were just to spend the day at home, by myself. I did it for me, not for you. Actually; painting my nails has worked as a stress-reliever for me. Such a small weird thing, but first of all; it makes me happy to look at my pretty painted nails (as long as they're not chipped), we look at them all day long and the process of creating some art on my body has made me feel better. I've heard others talk about the power of putting on some lipstick. It's not the lipstick in itself that brings magic, but the symbol of putting on putting on some war-paint on our lips actually does something to our psyche. Believe it or not. It's a little like putting on a uniform. If you've ever worn a uniform or if you have a special dress code to work, you know that it makes a difference. Imagine a lawyer in a jumpsuit!? Or a cop in a dress? How we dress makes us look differently at ourselves and at others. It's not just about judging people, it's about what signals we send out to ourselves and each other, but let's stay on track. Putting on a little lipstick or painting your nails may not transform you, but can make a little difference in how we proceed ourselves. And on days we might not feel like dressing up (we all have those days) a little lipstick will do. And you know what, you guessed it: I have a Pinterest board for that too. It's called // hair & beauty  (I've organized them into different sections, so it's easier getting what you/I want ;) You're welcome)  

If you've got anything you do that helps you when you're feeling low or some self-care tips, feel free to share with us in the comments.  I wish you the best winter. I want you to know that this is a safe place. I hope you can feel less alone when you're visiting my online home. Know that the bad days won't last forever and that even the queen has days she doesn't feel good. You're not alone in this. If it encouraged you, please share it and pass it on to people you think could need a little extra encouragement, I mean who doesn't?  Thank you for reading. Thank you for being you! // Line Thybo Xx

[comicteaparty]

September 27th, 2018 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party chat that occurred on September 27th, 2018, from 5PM - 7PM PDT.  The chat focused on Heart of Keol by keiiii.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB START!

Good evening, everyone~! This week’s Thursday Book Club is officially beginning! Today we are discussing Heart of Keol by keiiii~! (http://www.heartofkeol.com/)

Remember that Thursday discussions are completely freeform! However, every 30 minutes I will drop in OPTIONAL discussion questions in case you’d like a bit of a prompt. If you miss out on one of these prompts, you can find them pinned for the chat’s duration. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is fun and respectfully appreciating the comic. All that said, let’s begin!

QUESTION 1. What is your favorite scene in the comic so far and why?

Respheal

Any scene where Lu has reason to go "Ethan no"

Kabocha

....That's really accurate...

Respheal

Ain't it though xD(edited)

Kabocha

I'm still laughing at "What A douchebag"

SevereWxEddie

Lu sure says "Ethan, no!" a lot

Kabocha

http://www.heartofkeol.com/eng/002-06/ Yes, Ittan Nohm~ :3

Kabocha

@keii4ii -- how does that phrase break down? Is it just... ......................... an entire phrase? Or is one part of it clearly douchebag and the other the "what a"

Respheal

I think there was a bit on the train in particular where it was like "this is just going to be their relationship now huh" xD Ethan being a doofus and straight-faced Lu just "no. why. stop"

Draco Plato

I really liked how the action scenes have been handled, the effects are gorgeous

keii4ii

Ittan is a derogative uhhh.. what do you call it, determiner?

Nohm is a derogative pronoun

Megaparsec

Yeah every scene with a wyrm is just so awesome

Respheal

The wyrms are super pretty

SevereWxEddie

Oh, speaking of the train, have to say...I was very impressed with how you drew the rail infrastructure! The rails and tracks themselves looked very good.

Darkhalo4321

I loved that scene

Kabocha

Yesssss

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

Hi I dropped in, realizing I wasn't in this discord before

keii4ii

Thanks! The railroad provides lots of opportunities to do some fun perspective stuff

Mharz

My favorite scene is the geoduck scene that was really hilarious. I like Ethan and Lushaka's chemistry.

Tenor | Shinavar

Fav scene: Glowing toilet Also really gotta admire Ethan can apparently use the bathroom and hold a conversation with someone - I have kids and I can't do that

RebelVampire

i like any scene with hoodie kid. because i love the background illustrations and color work. theyre always so off putting. like when hoodie kid has all the red magic stuff surrounding and is just like "woo ethan come on lets burn things"

Kabocha

YES GEODUCKS

keii4ii

Though I'm glad most of that arc happened on a bridge, because at the end of it, I learned how much pain it is to draw the pebble variety railroad

SevereWxEddie

Ballast is...tedious

Kabocha

I always have a hard time writing that word because I wanna type "gooeyduck"

Darkhalo4321

Pyromaniac warning I guessss

Mharz

I like how Lushaka nonchalantly draws it.

And Ethan was like oooooohhhh

Draco Plato

all of the glowy effects are super cool, any use of power was just gorgeous

Tenor | Shinavar

Lushaka believes children need to be taught right, clearly /shot

keii4ii

The stick figure art was a collaborative masterpiece with Ethan adding the belly buttons

Respheal

Ahahaha makes sense that Lushaka wouldn't think to add belly buttons....

Mharz

Yeah

Megaparsec

Oh also the scene with the young Rencho and Ethan being like "OOH can you be a kitten?"

keii4ii

Not shown in the comic, but canon: the stick figures were vandalized by Danbi who returned to that spot while the others were away slaying the big jaguar

Darkhalo4321

Makes sense though- size and all?

Mharz

That scene where Ethan was pointing out he has no belly button is so fun

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

Agreed, I love the scenes where magic was being cast. And the one where it was with that Lady and the Master was quite intense. I thought the Master was going to be done for. Reason: the angle of how the fight was commencing(edited)

keii4ii

Danbi didn't want Hana to see them

Mharz

Lol danbi

keii4ii

TBH Master wouldn't have survived if Adela didn't go easy on her, out of her disdain for human suyori

RebelVampire

yes the master and adela's fight was beautiful @Joichi [Lavender Tea] like everything about the effects

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

I agreed! I need to catch up on more HnK

Mharz

I think that was the first time I saw Danbi really angry. The part when Ethan pointed out Lu has no bellybutton

Kabocha

...Oh, yeah, that... part...

Respheal

Can't really blame him though....?

Kabocha

XD He was gonna be all sympathetic for Lu and then

nawp

Respheal

I don't think Danbi's in the right, but he was (afaik) lied to there sooo

Darkhalo4321

I kind of laughed? Because he doesn't know anything about the world really and his first reaction was the belly button -

Respheal

The anger is understandable

keii4ii

Yeah, I'm partial to situations where both sides are right and wrong at the same time

Mharz

That makes me question tho, are Renchos suppose to not have that?(edited)

Megaparsec

One of Ethan's most endearing traits is his... not innocence but excitement about everything everyone else takes for granted

keii4ii

No belly buttons for Renchos!

Mharz

I-I'm curious

I mean the other thing

keii4ii

...barbs?

Mharz

rolls

Tenor | Shinavar

Mharz: He's not supposed to - he's wearing the mark of castration when he's not, if I followed the story right

Respheal

Well the tentacle's got barbs for days

Kabocha

Geoducks

Tenor | Shinavar

hence the being 'lied' to

keii4ii

Oh yeah, the dingly-doo

Tenor | Shinavar

Er, Danbi being lied to

Mharz

I should've googled that word's meaning

keii4ii

Cat Station

Mharz

Lol

SevereWxEddie

LOL!

Draco Plato

they took away his cats

Tenor | Shinavar

TBF castration is only removal of the nuts.

So even if he didn't have it I don't imagien Ethan would be any wiser

RebelVampire

they took away his cats to work on the railroad

hence the term cat station

Draco Plato

they are now the train masters

Tenor | Shinavar

wheeze

Respheal

Kinda makes me wonder how Renchos are born.....since that'd be the umbilical cord

Mharz

Oh okay

Respheal

Eggs

Mharz

My english is dumb

keii4ii

XD The eyeballs in the emoji kinda look like eggs

Tenor | Shinavar

Octopii style :D

Darkhalo4321

That's my question

Tenor | Shinavar

Lots of little litters in sacks in the water

/shot

Mharz

Pft

keii4ii

I will say Renchos are indeed born in litters

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

now I am curious about Renchos xD

Respheal

Ethan's pure curiosity is good though hahahaha

Darkhalo4321

It is

Mharz

Yeah

keii4ii

And their home world is mostly ocean dotted with small islands (well, the parts they inhabit anyway. I'm not sure if there's a huge land mass away from where they live)

Darkhalo4321

He's very curious about the world, the people there, it's good.

Mharz

What a douchebag is a pure souI I love him.

Kabocha

Oooh

Tenor | Shinavar

Oh gonna share this bc I can: 100% kept forgetting Danbi was a boy every time Ethan was shirtless bc I'd be mad he was so disrespectful

OTL

keii4ii

Poor Danbi

RebelVampire

i love how giant ethan is compared to pretty much everyone. like you get tricked sometimes cause of the closeups, but then theres those nice long shots where youre like "wow ethan you sure tower over everyone"

Sophie

Ethan's like an infant, excited about everything! It's adorable

Mharz

You know, keiiii my reaction is the same with Ethan's when I found out Danbi's a guy

keii4ii

Bwahahaha

Darkhalo4321

The Bull in a china shop comes to mind

Kabocha

How tall is Ethan, anyway?

Darkhalo4321

but a polite bull

keii4ii

6' 5" and not done growing

Respheal

Oh man I loved Ethan's reaction

SevereWxEddie

Ooof

Kabocha

NOT DONE?!

Respheal

HE BIG

Mharz

I was like dang danbi's so pretty. :y(edited)

Darkhalo4321

He'll be 10 feet when he's DONE

Kabocha

Danbi's charming, I think.

keii4ii

At full size, he'll be 6' 7" and also beefier

Mharz

I still like him tho

Ooh more beef for Ethan yes

keii4ii

There was actually a doodle of maxed out Ethan (like 6-8 years older?) that I did a while ago

Draco Plato

he has to be a big cat for lushaka

keii4ii

Slightly older Ethan

Mharz

Lu will be really pleased

Draco Plato

must be really hard to get shirts

Respheal

XXXXXL

Tenor | Shinavar

YAY NO WASHBOARD ABS.

keii4ii

He's got a little squishy over the abs

Darkhalo4321

He has REAL STRENGTH

Mharz

Yas

Tenor | Shinavar

REAL STRENGTH YES HHHHHHHHHHH <3

Darkhalo4321

he's not no gym floozy(edited)

keii4ii

Lu has enough washboard for the both of them

Respheal

True

Mharz

Perfect strong body

Draco Plato

Lu has beautiful abs

Tenor | Shinavar

Lmao

RebelVampire

ethan will be charged double for tailored clothes because of the sheer amount of fabric required

Tenor | Shinavar

After learning how you get washboard abs no ty, gimmie da meat /shot

Rebel: LOL

keii4ii

Yeah, you either gotta win the genetics lotto, or ... do some insane diet control for a six pack

Tenor | Shinavar

Better take real good care of those clothes

Diet control to serious unhealthy levels. You're supposed to have fat over the abs to protect them - so it may look nice but 9/10 you're actually super weak in real life applications of them so yeaaah

I HOPE KITTY BOI IS OKAY D:

keii4ii

He's okay. If he starts putting on fat, he'll start putting them on his already massive thighs first

(they have different fat distribution patterns, lol)

Tenor | Shinavar

wheeze

Fair!

SevereWxEddie

So those abs would not in fact be rock hard and a punch to them would be really bad, then?

Tenor | Shinavar

So- can he crush a melon with dem thighs

asking for a friend >> <<

Mharz

He has tentacles tenor he's fine

Tenor | Shinavar

/Almost made a hentai joke

/Gunna go get a drink lol

Megaparsec

On a totally unrelated note the Lu-catfish was hilarious

keii4ii

X'D derpfish

Mharz

Lol

keii4ii

Not as derp as puffer, but hey

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

@RebelVampire haha I was wondering when the tailors have to charge Ethan for the clothes he has to be handmade for him

keii4ii

It wouldn't be as bad as it would be for Lushaka, if he lived in our world

Mharz

Pft

keii4ii

I'm pretty sure his thigh circumference > his waist circumference

Respheal

Oh geez yeah

Mharz

Heck yeah

His thigh is really big

Never skip leg day folks

Draco Plato

yis

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

i always like that aspect of Heart of Keol, that you designed Ethan that he is drastically different from the rest of the people. Other than Lushaku, i think hes sort of muscular too

keii4ii

Yep, Ethan is beefy

Beef filled cinnamon roll

(sounds like a Middle Eastern food...)

Mharz

Mmmmm

Draco Plato

yeah the different body shapes are really cool to see

Sophie

Very diverse cast, yup!

Mharz

I really like how Keiiii pulled that off :3

keii4ii

I'm glad to hear! I have a lot of fun drawing the different bodies

Tenor | Shinavar

I love it too~

keii4ii

like they're ALL various types of "conventionally attractive" bodies, but still different

Mharz

Yasss

Draco Plato

yeah that is really neat~!

Sophie

Everybody is so easily to read and keep apart from another. It's really great!

keii4ii

I had readers point out Adela's boobs helped them remember who she was, when she reappeared in chapter 16

Mharz

Pft

Draco Plato

omg XD well they do help

her hair and ears is how i recognized her at that point

Mharz

She does have really huge boobs

Draco Plato

and her shoes

Mharz

Same draco

RebelVampire

QUESTION 2. Within the comic, Ethan has a plethora of mysteries surrounding him. What do you think happened to Ethan’s dad? Does Ethan’s Dad’s disappearance have some connection to Keol, or is it unrelated? Who is the child-like figure who initially sends to Ethan to Keol? Why send Ethan to Keol in the first place? What is the figure’s interest in Ethan? Is Ethan somehow special, especially in regards to his apparent powers he unlocks? What do you think the child figure’s connection to the Queen might be (if any)? Does it have something to do with the Queen’s missing mate? Lastly, do you think Ethan will get home? If he does, do you think he’ll regret it?

keii4ii

Yeah, I have to draw her body without boobs first, and then add the boobs in order to avoid anatomy disasters

Mharz

By the looks of it, the hooded dude is his Dokkabi?

Respheal

That's the gist I got

The fact that his dad was scared of outlets--what was up with that O.o

Darkhalo4321

Makes me wonder-

Respheal

I mean...PTSD, but....outlets?

Tenor | Shinavar

2: Ethan's dad was a Prisoner of War - and suffering from serious PTSD is my bets - assuming the whole sory isn't some metaphysical message in Ethan's head ofc <_< I feel Hooded kid is the Dokkabi, too, since there's a symbollic pattern. BUT the curiousity is the Queen because she has the symbol, too, but that's explain away her immoretality - so my theory is the kid is the queen calling Ethan to her side.

SevereWxEddie

Electircal based "aggressive interrogation" techniques?

Darkhalo4321

I was thinking Light too? He was in the corner if I recall-

Tenor | Shinavar

Resp: TOrture technique

SevereWxEddie

Electrical

Tenor | Shinavar

The buzzing of lights can be used in torture

Mharz

Also yeah I'm curious what happened to Ethan's dad. He was scared of the electric socket which makes me wondered if he was electrecuted or struck by lightning

Tenor | Shinavar

and outlets can carry that sound

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

wow that is alot of questions to answer, like 8 Qs XD

Respheal

Well, I did guess that, since he seemed to also be scared of lightning

Aaaah true

SevereWxEddie

Is it ever explicitly stated which war Dad went off to?

Respheal

The minute buzzing

keii4ii

@Joichi [Lavender Tea] Combo attack

Respheal

For real xD

keii4ii

@SevereWxEddie Nope!

Draco Plato

wondered if his dad was in the world ethan is in now

SevereWxEddie

.....

Draco Plato

went through the red gate

SevereWxEddie

Oooo. THERE'S a theory

Tenor | Shinavar

I do think Ethan will make it home however I hope i's not too soon because as it is right now I don't think Ethan could handle leaving his new friends behind lol

Megaparsec

How long was he gone? Does it match up with the opening frequency?

Draco Plato

it actually didn't sound like people were really able to get back since they were there awhile

the people who'd gone through the gate

Tenor | Shinavar

But tbf, how would they know they did get back?

And not just went missing?

SevereWxEddie

@keii4ii does it matter which war it was, as in plot-relevant, or is it more of a "this happened in the story past?"

Tenor | Shinavar

Unless they reversed fireballed into the sky /shot.

Mharz

Must have something to do with the Heart?

keii4ii

@SevereWxEddie The latter

Megaparsec

Oh never mind the Red gate opens every year

Tenor | Shinavar

I liiike the idea his dad went into the world though because that would mean there is a way to get back

Kabocha

So, I was thinking hoodie kid was actually like................. ...................related to the empress

Draco Plato

the heart is the titular character

Tenor | Shinavar

somehow

Draco Plato

so i mean

Sophie

I'm wondering what people back are thinking Ethan is doing? I mean he's been gone for a bit by now...

Draco Plato

i wonder if time passes differently

RebelVampire

maybe nobody cares ethan is gone.

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

that's an interesting discussion on whether the travelling MC will go home, probably that's the end solution. But I'm definitely intrigued where the father went, the idea of war and torture sounds likely.. gosh that is so sad. I was debating whether his father had been struck with a deep mental illness, maybe even dementia

SevereWxEddie

It could be like Narnia all over again

keii4ii

@RebelVampire

RebelVampire

are just like "i guess thats one less mouth to feed"

Draco Plato

oh no not narnia XD

Tenor | Shinavar

Rebel: I hope not

Mharz

:c

Tenor | Shinavar

Getting tired of reading that lmao

Draco Plato

well when he was going through reasons to go back it didn't really sound like he needed to go back

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

aw that is so sad Rebel, its like turning Ethan's story to the angst teen comic D:

Mharz

Lol

Draco Plato

like maybe my grandad will remember me once isn't a great reason to go back probably if he builds a life with friends and family in the new world

Tenor | Shinavar

Kabo: /Delayed: How would you reckon, if kid is related to the empyrss, how hey avoided being seen so far only by Ethan?

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

hmm my theory is, if I know about alt world travelling, probably time is different? OR or what if Ethan's family has 'missing poster' signs when he gets a glimpse of his world?

Mharz

I think it's a Dokkabi thing, tenor

Becos he saw the one with the lady

Tenor | Shinavar

Yeah but that wyrm wasn't as developed as the kid

Though hey carried the same symbol, the lady didn't have that symbol the wyrm did

Sophie

I could imagine red riding hood is some sort of gate keeper for the red gate?

Tenor | Shinavar

versus the wueen

omfg I can't type I'm so sorry lol

Kabocha

“Kabo: /Delayed: How would you reckon, if kid is related to the empyrss, how hey avoided being seen so far only by Ethan?” @Tenor | Shinavar -- magic.

Tenor | Shinavar

I mean- fair -

Kabocha

or a spiritual connection, but you know, teh dokkabi theory is solid

RebelVampire

maybe ethan did eat a wyrm but it was on earth so he didnt know. and the kid is the mental manifestation of said wyrm(edited)

Mharz

I do like his rainbow eyes tbh

Draco Plato

that'd be interesting rebel

Tenor | Shinavar

He though it was a octopus

Draco Plato

maybe it's the kid he didn't know he had

Mharz

Pft

Kabocha

Are we going to imply that this is all a bad food poisoning trip

Respheal

YES

Kabocha

and Lushaka is just his guilt for eating bad octopus

Respheal

no

Mharz

Lol

RebelVampire

that is my second crazy theory. ethan is the destined queen's mate and hoodie kid is their future child who astrally projected themselves there for mystery reasons

Draco Plato

hurt a cat once and ate an octopus

Respheal

kabo no

Tenor | Shinavar

Lushaka is the local stray

Draco Plato

omg rebel mine too

Kabocha

@RebelVampire SEE THAT WAS MY THEORY

Draco Plato

legit thought that

Kabocha

BUT NOT A CRAZY THEORY

Respheal

Y'KNOW

Yeah soon as I heard "destined mate"(edited)

I was like

Tenor | Shinavar

Personally I'm hoping 'destined mate'is like 100% a misunderstanding

Draco Plato

yup, was like oh hey must be ethan, that you ethan

Kabocha

Or Danbi.

Tenor | Shinavar

and the wyrm-queen can only be freed by being tied to someone so she can gtfo

Draco Plato

yeah could be danbi

Respheal

I imagine if that IS the case I imagine it'll get subverted

Megaparsec

Supposed to be a Visitor I think

Respheal

Yeah

Sophie

Eyes overloading....

RebelVampire

the plot twist is the queen has been dead for years. everyone just assumes shes alive because theyve been receiving orders from someone behind a curtain.

ethan must expose the wizard of oz essentially

SevereWxEddie

Ooo

Draco Plato

i wondered that one too rebel

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

lmao the wizard of Oz reveal

Draco Plato

if she was really dead

Kabocha

See, I had also initially assumed the Queen was the kid

Respheal

saaaaame

Darkhalo4321

SAME KABO

Tenor | Shinavar

Saaaam

e

Darkhalo4321

But someone stole the JOB

Kabocha

......................Yes?

Draco Plato

yeah, cause of the tattoo on their face

Megaparsec

Still could be, with shapeshifting or whatever

Darkhalo4321

TRUE-

Mharz

Yeah

Megaparsec

or astral projection

Respheal

The tattoo is different though

Slightly

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

I thought the red hooded kid was a mysterious figure and immortal xD I might be simple minded.

Respheal

But they're almost certainly related

Does that make the queen a dokkabi...spirit....thing?

Kabocha

GASP!

How long do dokkabi live for

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

yeah I'm thinking about that once..

Mharz

It's a wyrm god

Draco Plato

they could be world hoppers too, ones that can control it

Tenor | Shinavar

Oh god

Respheal

It's never explained what world the queen comes from, and there's just the three gates

Tenor | Shinavar

-Might have caught on to Kabo's gasp-

You thinkin she needs new bodies to stay immortal/controls hrough them?

mathtans

mk, I'm here... couldn't seem to get off the first page of the comic though, nothing would load. (j/k)

I did only manage to get to the end of 8 though. Busy week. ^^

Kabocha

Is Ethan... the new Queen

keii4ii

And how does the Elyeo eugenics thing figure into all this

@mathtans XDDDD

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

PFFFTT Ethan the queen?(edited)

Mharz

Gasp

Tenor | Shinavar

Well considering everything we've been told has been unraveling, we don't acually know what's fact with the Elyeo

so I don't trust shit lol

Respheal

all hail the new Father King Mother Queen

Darkhalo4321

same tenor

mathtans

The Queen is actually a dude. Calling it now.

Kabocha

well, I mean, like If the queen is a Dokkabi and Dokkabi need a body... ....And hoodie kid is somehow related to the queen...

Draco Plato

maybe their hair is the secret to the red gate

keii4ii

That's a good attitude probably at this point in time not trusting shit

Kabocha

and ethan has a dokkabi...

RebelVampire

well if were going through the life sucking or body sucking then it seems likely the elyeo magic is needed to sustain that. dont elyeo live super long?

Megaparsec

At first I wondered if the Elyeo died in childbirth

But that's been mostly disproven

Respheal

Okay but also Ethan using the magic stuff was pretty awesome

Darkhalo4321

yes ^

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

I'm intrigued with the Elyeo lore too, as well as the Renchos

Tenor | Shinavar

Yeeee

Respheal

BUUUUUUURRRRRRN(edited)

keii4ii

ACTUALLY ------- ... ... (minor spoiler but I should still refrain)

Darkhalo4321

REFRAIN

Respheal

BE STRONG KEIIII

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

poor Keii, can't reveal anything yet

Mharz

Rencho lives longer iirc

Than elyeos

Tenor | Shinavar

Also I'm mad at everyone in that party when they had Hana and didn't think of finding a way to hide her ears while travelling. innocent babies asking for trouble ((I'm sure KittyBoi let i stay out for the trouble. He's a cat.))

keii4ii

Yeah, Lushaka is older than any Elyeo could ever be

mathtans

As to fave scene (again, only through the first 8), I kind of liked the dawning revelation of gender on Ethan's part. Just cleverly foreshadowed by the townsperson, then interesting graphics as the lightbulb went on.

The fight scenes were amazing too though.

Kabocha

Re: burning https://youtu.be/LH-QwK4v0ZI?t=88

Respheal

Kabo no

RebelVampire

@mathtans great scene choice math

Mharz

I like the gif on that

keii4ii

@Tenor | Shinavar Her ears were actually hidden when they ran into those bandits! The dude was just feeling for her ears just in case, out of the assumption that a white girl = potentially Elyeo

Darkhalo4321

oooo

Draco Plato

yeah her hair was covering her ears

keii4ii

Schrodinger's Elyeo

RebelVampire

ah thats right. but rencho probably dont make good body double things. cause if i was a body stealing "immortal" queen, id picked the bodies that could do the magic plant shit

Kabocha

^ YES 100%

I'm onboard with this.

Mharz

I mean yahhh

Draco Plato

plus plants are symbolic of new life and renewal

keii4ii

Yeah if you're immortal and you can steal bodies easily, longevity of the target body probably isn't a big factor

Tenor | Shinavar

I couldn't tell sorry :(

keii4ii

Though if it's difficult, that changes things

Megaparsec

Especially if you have a whole bunch of them right there

Tenor | Shinavar

But tyty on the heads up~

Kabocha

So... You know, maybe... Danbi's mom is now the Queen.

Temporarily.

mathtans

I found that whole 'listening to plants but being unable to talk back' aspect of the world building really neat.

Tenor | Shinavar

Makes me wanna punch them more lmao

Mharz

Kabo

Darkhalo4321

OH That's a good plot twist Kabo-

Draco Plato

forgive me danbi i must leave you to rule the world

Mharz

Rip

Superjustinbros

HAI

mathtans

"Am I not part of the world? Rule me."

Mharz

His mom seem to be a special kind of Elyeo

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

ohh I was wondering where her ears were, i didn't even see them in the comic

Tenor | Shinavar

Nah it's Danbi's mom but not her mind. Danbi gonna run up and hug mom and mom's gunna have a twisted smile on her face like 'Lol oh dear this is a problem"

RebelVampire

now tbf, maybe she didnt leave to rule the world. she went to help the queen and the queen keeled over. and danbi's mom is nothing if but an opportunist

keii4ii

@Joichi [Lavender Tea] They actually braid her hair around her ears

Mharz

Pft

Kabocha

Danbi's certainly an oddity though, being a male Elyeo...(edited)

Superjustinbros

Sorry I'm late, got caught up in this one thing I was doing

Mharz

He's half human tho

Draco Plato

looool

Tenor | Shinavar

Hana's braids pop up and twirl with her ears. Lil helicopter blades

Draco Plato

i would love that if the mom was just an opportunist

Mharz

Lol

Megaparsec

Well normally half human elyeo are just elyeo

As far as we know

Tenor | Shinavar

Annnd now stuck with Hana's braids spinning like the leek song, I'm off to feed my children brb

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

I'd love to see a twist with Danbi's mom, whichever it'll be!

Respheal

“ Does Ethan’s Dad’s disappearance have some connection to Keol, or is it unrelated?”

I don't remember seeing this answered yet--I'm gonna say no. Ethan's flashbacks and dreams have sorta had Keol elements to them, but I'm attributing that just to him being in Keol and probably some of the Dokkabi influence. I don't think his dad is connected to Keol

Mharz

The thing is Elyeo's are all women

mathtans

Oh, and that braids thing! With the one braid meaning available but more meaning not ready for a relationship, that was fascinating to me. We need a system like that on Earth, maybe.

Kabocha

Ethan's dad is just baggage

Mharz

Which makes Danbi real strange

Draco Plato

is danbi trans

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

oh YES, I really like that culture too about the braids @mathtans I'd wish we had that system too(edited)

Draco Plato

if they're all women

keii4ii

He's cis

There was actually a bathhouse scene that got canceled

that would've answered that question

Draco Plato

so then he's a one of a kind

Megaparsec

As far as we know...

Draco Plato

yis

Respheal

If elyeo have a son with a human, the child is a human though right?

Darkhalo4321

Bathhouse sceeeene

Draco Plato

no they're supposed to be elyeo still i thought

keii4ii

@Respheal We may find out soon-ish!

Mharz

No I think they'll be elyeo

keii4ii

"soon-ish" in webcomic time terms

Kabocha

NOOOOOOOOOOO

Superjustinbros

Can I just jump in and say I like the art style/setting of this comic? It definitely hits the asian/oriental theme perfectly.

Kabocha

Soon TM

Draco Plato

five years from now we will know

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

I thought Danbi simply dressed in women's clothes because of the job as a Sayori (?)

Megaparsec

It's been said in story that they would be elyeo, might be inaccurate though

Mharz

Tbf Danbi is wearing pants(edited)

RebelVampire

the specific wording was that daughters are guranteed to be elyeos

it said nothing about sons

keii4ii

It's been said their daughters will be Elyeo! But nothing's been said about sons

Mharz

Gasp

Megaparsec

Ah! Did not notice that!

keii4ii

Actually

The Korean version had Master say something about the sons, haha

Mharz

Me neither

Gasp

Kabocha

Since it was stated in the Korean version, can you... spoil us? :3

Mharz

Must. Learn. Korean

mathtans

SJB: Yeah, blows my mind about there being a Korean version that's translated. I wonder what gets lost in transition.

SevereWxEddie

Ditto

Superjustinbros

inb4 no spoiling

oh snap Korean owo

keii4ii

Elyeo sons all take after the father species (which makes sense if you think about how they reproduce in their home world: they reproduce with plants, not only continuing their own species, but also continuing the plants' as well)

mathtans

Cool plan about the speech balloons too. Lots of little touches like that. Makes me wonder what it looked like before apparently some edits were done on earlier pages.

Superjustinbros

That's cool seeing comics getting translated into asian languages(edited)

Draco Plato

oooooo

Megaparsec

HMMMM

But not entirely, because he has the funny hair color

mathtans

"That guy is a wall flower." has a whole different meaning on other worlds.

Latisha

That's interesting

Mharz

Come to think of it, we dont know who Danbi's dad is either

keii4ii

@Megaparsec Yep, the hair could still be an anomaly even with this new info!

@mathtans

So I don't know if I mentioned this in the authors' notes anywhere, but Elyeos are never heterosexual because they come from a world with no humanoid males.

Respheal

I got the gist that Danbi might have the genetics of an Elyeo, but the phenotype (since he's male) is....mostly human xD

Superjustinbros

Ooooooooh

So we're talking, 100% lesbian?

keii4ii

Some lesbian, some pan

Danbi's mom was pan

Mharz

:y

Superjustinbros

At least you're not forcing les or pan pride down the reader's throats like what I see in a lot of things nowadays

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

awesome, I wanted to ask if there were queer characters in HnK that's a nice explanation too

RebelVampire

QUESTION 3. Danbi, who inevitably starts Ethan on his quest to the Heart of Keol, has plenty of his own mysteries. Do you think Danbi’s Elyeo heritage will get the group into trouble somehow? What do you think happened to Danbi’s mother? Is she at the Heart of Keol, or is something else going on? Do you think she’s even still alive? Do you think she was taken away, or did she perhaps leave by her own choice? Do you think Danbi will manage to locate her? And if so, what do you think will happen? What do you think Danbi will do if he reaches the Heart of Keol and finds out she isn’t there? Speaking of which, what in general do you think the Queen’s interest in Elyeo is?

keii4ii

@Joichi [Lavender Tea] The Dokkabi lady is also ace/aro! There's at least one other queer character who's been introduced, but I... may keep that one secret since it's a secret for her

(queer other than Elyeos, that is)

Mharz

He did dye his hair, right?

Superjustinbros

Ooooooo~

keii4ii

(Elyeos AND Renchos)

mathtans

Danbi's mother is new Queen. Calling it now. ^^

Latisha

I think it will bring trouble sometime later

Mharz

Renchos are all men, correct?

Superjustinbros

tfw I just remembered Queer and Queen rhyme

Respheal

I wonder if that's the transgender character you mentioned early on

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

@keii4ii aw thank you, no problem, glad to have that confirmed ^^

keii4ii

@Mharz THERE WAS THAT GIRL!

Mharz

Oh yeah dang

Wooops

keii4ii

Though I guess it could've been a boy wearing a skirt

Superjustinbros

SPOILED

keii4ii

Naw, the Rencho girl is cis

Mharz

Sorry that slipped my mind lol

mathtans

Gotta have a girl somewhere. Only guys are disposable.

keii4ii

It's fine! She hasn't had a lot of screentime

Superjustinbros

lmao

Mharz

I'm curious if Danbi dyeing his hair works

Superjustinbros

Would Danbi get powers of he deyed his hair(edited)

Respheal

Elyeo hair doesn't seem like it....glows or anything

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

I want to believe Danbi's Mama is alive now everyone's theories make me have a feeling she may make a return. I mean at first the implications seem like she was taken away.

Mharz

At least he doesn't have ears

Respheal

So I can't imagine it'd show through the dye

Mharz

That made sense tho why he's braiding it

mathtans

Maybe Ethan will have to make a choice between getting back to see his Dad and saving Danbi's Mom.

Superjustinbros

Just maybe(edited)

Mharz

Becos there's their tradition about hair

Tenor | Shinavar

3> Yes, Danbi's already causing problems just due to how careful they have to be. I believe mom originally went to the heart but if she's still there is up to debate. I do like the concept she left of her own choice - mostly because I'm exhausted of constantly reading about bad parents and it's been getting hella isolating so the idea she'd have gone willingly, to protect her children, is really want I hope for.

SevereWxEddie

@mathtans ooo, that's mean

keii4ii

We writers are a mean breed

Darkhalo4321

WE ARE

RebelVampire

im torn on what i believe about the mom. i expect a subversion of them finding her at the heart though. so not being there, was there but died of something unrelated, going somewhere entirely.

Superjustinbros

>giving your characters in your stories hell The truth, keii

RebelVampire

maybe ethan is wrong, a gate opened on his world, and danbi's mom was on earth the whole time.

Mharz

Gasp

mathtans

Nadeko agrees.

Maybe Danbi's mom is the mystery woman who sent Ethan?

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

@Tenor | Shinavar I agree with the bad parents, and the neglectful parent trope

Megaparsec

Ooh do we have evidence people get pulled out of this world too?

I don't think anyone's said anything but I guess they wouldn't know

Tenor | Shinavar

Joi: I'm okay with it once in a while but honestly it feels like it's been nothing but everything I've read lately to the point I think I'm getting sensitive to the topic lmao

Mharz

Not yet at least

mathtans

There's no evidence to the contrary. ^.^

Mharz

Tho I think it's a possibility.

keii4ii

There's something I wanna point out, and it's been shown in the comic, but merely pointing it out might count as a spoiler

Tenor | Shinavar

lulll

Megaparsec

I wonder if the linked worlds get portals between them too

Mharz

That ppl can go from keol to earth.

Tenor | Shinavar

^It would support the "Dad went to Keol" theory

Superjustinbros

oh boi spoilers

Tenor | Shinavar

and backs the chance Ethan can get home

bc tbh, I think he needs to go home. He doesn't have closure

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

*half reading the rest of the comic, half responding.

Tenor | Shinavar

and the idea that he'll just up and abandon his dad feels off

Mharz

Yas

No he does intend to go back

Tenor | Shinavar

I understand he doesn't have the best life but considering how absorbed and protective he is of his faher, I can' imagine him leaving that just because he made some friends

keii4ii

Yeah

Darkhalo4321

What if he could go home, but go back?

I'd be okay with that-

Mharz

Remember the first time he heard of he heart is that there's a way he can go back to Earth there

Superjustinbros

The power of friends.

Mharz

Why he agrees to come with Danbi

Tenor | Shinavar

True

SevereWxEddie

Very true

Respheal

I don't think they know there's a way back at the Heart

Mharz

He clings to the hope his dad will remember him

Respheal

Just that, if there IS a way, someone there would probably know

mathtans

waits for keii4ii to point out the thing...

keii4ii

Not sure if a good idea

Mharz

Lol

Tenor | Shinavar

See I'm more curious: Is it dad doesn't remember him, or is dad locked into a level of traumatized dellusion to the point he doesn't see Ethan is there

Superjustinbros

@mathtans

mathtans

Thing about Ethan going home is I feel like that would be at the end of the comic? Since him coming started it all off.

Tenor | Shinavar

Because in war PTSD you can relive that moment over and over and over-

(Assuming it's that ofc)

Mharz

He thinks Ethan is his dad tho(edited)

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

right now its just fan speculation, I don't mind if the author prefers to show it in the work

Tenor | Shinavar

Mharz: That can be a triggering thing happening still

SevereWxEddie

@Tenor | Shinavar

Mharz

Yahh

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

yeah I agree with Mathtans, I typically expect it to be at the end, or near the end

Superjustinbros

PTSD sounds scary though

Mharz

It does

Tenor | Shinavar

A friend's father who had severe PTSD thought he was someone in the army he faced down

Respheal

Since it's mostly guessed at that electricity might have been a torture method resulting in Ethan's dad's current state, it's also possible the electricity literally fried his brain a bit (edited)

Superjustinbros

Christ

Tenor | Shinavar

He's been beaten up by his dad in those moments because he's mentally not there

I's horrifying and TBH If it IS that, I feel SO MUCH for Ethan and his mother especially

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

yikes that is really hard to live with..

Mharz

Sorry I have to step off early. It's gym day today. I'll answer the rest of the questions later. :'3

Tenor | Shinavar

Bai Mharz~

Superjustinbros

Alright, cya

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

see you Mharz

Superjustinbros

What a hard life these guys have lived

Tenor | Shinavar

Resp: Could also be Ethan looks like his dad, too, since Ethan got raits from his dad

so it just who he assumes it is?

Respheal

Oh true

keii4ii

Someone in the comment section noticed in the tentacle market scene, that Ethan acts like someone who had a lot of experience caring for a person with serious triggers (since he was kinda assuming the sight of tentacle food = triggers for Lushaka). I was so happy that they noticed it (•̩̩̩ ᴗ •̩̩̩)

Draco Plato

the electricity could relate to something on keol since their glowy powers could be seen as that

Superjustinbros

lol

Kabocha

I had... assumed that would be the case too XD

he was like "NO LU, THEY'RE NOT TRYING TO EAT YOU"

RebelVampire

tbh though what happens if ethan goes back on that vain hope his dad will recognize him and nothing of the sort happens? i feel that would be horribly traumatizing for ethan, and the situation probably is already traumatizing

Respheal

@keii4ii that was so cute

keii4ii

@Draco Plato And if they can "burn," who says that can't include frying things with electricity?

Draco Plato

yus, exactly

Tenor | Shinavar

Rebel: If he's matured enough to accept what's happened, he could theoretically find peace

theoretically

Superjustinbros

That's actually pretty clever

Tenor | Shinavar

Big emphasis

mathtans

So, about Danbi, will there be a scene where he has to go undercover as a woman? (seeks a more lighthearted thread)

Tenor | Shinavar

Because that'll depend a lot on how he matures, if he matures

SevereWxEddie

Maybe, but that would sound like it could be a very downer "ending"

keii4ii

@mathtans Technically he is unintentionally doing that 24/7

SevereWxEddie

@RebelVampire

RebelVampire

i do not look to ethan as my beacon of potential maturity yet XD

mathtans

@keii4ii This is true... intentionally then?

Draco Plato

I wondered if ethan was something other than human too and that he has a deeper connection to keol

Tenor | Shinavar

Plot Twist: Ethan is the one who has to go undercover as a woman

keii4ii

Actually there was a canceled arc

Draco Plato

that'd be a very Thor mythos moment, lol

Kabocha

All hail Queen Ethan?

Darkhalo4321

OOooh- That's an interesting twist @Draco Plato

keii4ii

where Danbi had to pose as a female suyori

But he didn't want to

SevereWxEddie

If Ethan comes back and nothing has changed that would be a very downer ending. If he comes back and his adventures help him find peace in his situation, I suppose that would be bittersweet?

keii4ii

So Ethan proposed that he (Ethan) and Lushaka also dress as women, for morale

Superjustinbros

Did Draco just pull a twist?

keii4ii

So the three of them show up at the destination wearing feminine clothes

Tenor | Shinavar

Lushaka was the prettiest, I bet /shot

RebelVampire

this sounds like a good arc.

keii4ii

and the local head suyori (the person they were attempting to deceive) instantly picks out Lushaka, not Ethan, as a man in disguise

Draco Plato

wouldn't his hair give him away

cause of how it grows in

Tenor | Shinavar

...would it? Cause we only know how boys grow, not girls

Draco Plato

we saw the little girl's hair tho

Tenor | Shinavar

If it's not the same then yeah

Draco Plato

and it grew all around

keii4ii

because she assumed someone who looks like Ethan would have to be really dumb to try to pass as a woman, so Ethan must be an ultra-masculine woman

Tenor | Shinavar

True - I just assumed she was longer furred and was using that lmao

Superjustinbros

How common are ultra-masculine women in this world anyways?

mathtans

So Ethan has to dress up like a woman and is mistaken for Danbi's mother. Hijinks ensue.

Superjustinbros

Kinda curious now

keii4ii

Naw, the little girl's hair was also short on the sides. But her ear fluff covers her head too much

Draco Plato

oooh okay

keii4ii

Also remember she asks Lushaka if he's "secretly her age" based on his hair

So the hair thing is more related to physical maturity

Tenor | Shinavar

Ahh ok

keii4ii

Like a lion mane

Draco Plato

which made me wonder if girls get hair all around sooner

and that his height difference should have been a tip off to her that he was older

keii4ii

Hence "secretly"

"are you actually a kid who happens to be super tall and uh... not very kid-looking"

Draco Plato

do girls get hair all around sooner than boys do?

Superjustinbros

"Maybe."

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

aw I would have love to see that arc where Ethan and Lushaka dress as women. Since I see Danbi as Danbi being cute, because he fits in any clothes

keii4ii

@Draco Plato Yeah. Girls grow faster

Draco Plato

so then you could identify lukasha as a boy by that at his height and apparent age

Tenor | Shinavar

LOL

Omg Luk on stilts

wheeze

keii4ii

Not really, he's not supposed to have that kinda hair when the rest of his body is clearly adult

RebelVampire

i want the arc mostly for ethan trying to pass as a woman. cause literally danbi, why would you think thatd work at all

Superjustinbros

"Drag time, you say?"

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

yes, I really like that twist!

mathtans

Would Ethan wear one braid? O.o

Tenor | Shinavar

C-Can he wear a braid?

Or would it be an amazing wig?

Superjustinbros

This would be a fun twist~

keii4ii

Maybe they can make a baby braid out of Ethan's floof

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

it would probably be a wig XD

Draco Plato

technically ethan could pass as a woman in the sense they have different species passing through the red gate regularly and he could just be a new species

should just tell them that

Tenor | Shinavar

True

mathtans

"I'm actually a mineral."

Respheal

A very, very big species

Superjustinbros

Interesting

RebelVampire

touche, he is the new giant species

Tenor | Shinavar

Ethan just pulls out all the cultural knowledge he knows from America to try to make up a new species from the Red Gate

keii4ii

He's not a human, he's a Murican

Draco Plato

I am cowboy

Tenor | Shinavar

MURICAN AKSJDHKALSD

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

I'd love to see him put fruit in his robes, and try to pretend having big melons

Respheal

OH NO

Superjustinbros

"MERICAN! #*&@ YEAH"(edited)

Tenor | Shinavar

Bombs, for best reference

plz bombs

Kabocha

He puts on his robe and wizard hat...

Superjustinbros

YES BOMBS

*explosions everywhare

Tenor | Shinavar

Kabo: sTOP MAKING ME FEEL OLD

Respheal

Kabo no

NO

Superjustinbros

KABO WHAT ARE YOU DOIN

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

I don't know what's happening anymore

mathtans

"Your fruits are unbalanced."

keii4ii

I'm sure he would've loved to put on his robe and wizard hat when he first met Adela

Superjustinbros

"fix your fruits please."

Kabocha

He sure was going there with Danbi

mathtans

"Wait, that's not a wizard HAT...."

SevereWxEddie

Why am I now reminded of that scene from "Robin Hood: Men in Tights?"

Superjustinbros

>Men in Tights

RebelVampire

the idea of ethan trying to fight adela in a wizard robe and hat is too funny

Tenor | Shinavar

Though speaking of Adela, I'm curious on her role. I know she serves to bring in others of her kind but it makes me think how bad it is ifor them there if she's willing to do it

Like, is she getting something out of it? Does she feel the outside world is worse?

RebelVampire

well the outside world is filled with hunters

Respheal

MMMMMMMMM just because you're part of a group doesn't mean you won't do nasty things to that group

mathtans

Less of a minority?

Kabocha

It's safer for sure

Maybe she wants to be next in line for empress

RebelVampire

but also what res said

Tenor | Shinavar

Resp: Tis true, I'm just curious if she is or is she doing it as a sense of righteousness

An evil for the greater good or however the statement goes

RebelVampire

QUESTION 4. Plenty of other events in the comic still have their own needed answers. Do you think Lushaka has an ulterior motive for traveling with Ethan and Danbi? Do you think Lushaka will be able to get his legs healed, or will he be suck with the poison? What about Adela? Do you think she’ll manage to overcome her head injury to hear the plants again, or is something else going on? What does Adela have to do with the “song” Danbi remembers hearing in the past surrounding his mother? World wise, what do you think is going on with the people of Xi? Will their outrage affect Ethan’s group in some way? Lastly, due to the similar Korean language, do you think there’s a hidden connection between Keol and Earth?

Respheal

Certainly she thinks it's probably the best choice, but maybe based on incomplete information

Superjustinbros

Get them healed

I doubt medical services are that primitive(edited)

Kabocha

Give Adela 2 or 3 years, she'll be fine. I think. I mean.

Respheal

My guess re: language was that one of the first Earth people to get sucked into the red gate was probably Korean?

Kabocha

....Eventually she'll be okay.

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

I really like Lushaka and how we're not sure about his motives. Probably just want to get his legs healed(edited)

Tenor | Shinavar

4> I think the song Danbi heard is the plants' natural song around a mature of their species. I hope Adela + Luk both don't get fixed so they can fuck with each other like old war vets for that stint lmao.

Long old!married couple levels of bickering

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

I'm not always good at thinking up head canons(edited)

Superjustinbros

Me neither, tbh

mathtans

There's a lot that happens after part 10. ^.^;;

Kabocha

@Joichi [Lavender Tea] the secret to head canons is to extrapolate to the most logical but bizarre outcome

eg: The Queen is a Dokkabi. Maybe.

Superjustinbros

Thanks for the strategy @Kabocha

Kabocha

The trick is it needs to be somewhat plausible.

Respheal

But that's completely plausible

mathtans

Maybe the plants are just talking at a different pitch around Adela. Doesn't hear certain frequencies. Could hear... dandelions? (They're significant and all...)

Tenor | Shinavar

On the people of Xi: Sounds like some seriously oppressed shit - like, for comparison, the levels of xenophobic hatred similar to America and Muslims right now.

(Just with more severe repercussions)

(Or actions, anyway, considering the deahs mentioned)

keii4ii

Yeah, it's really bad to say the least

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

thank you Kabo and Keii!

SevereWxEddie

I wonder about the connection to Earth! Especially the existence of the railroad. It seems like technology levels vary wildly across Keol: where Ethan landed, there were simple farms all around, and he and the party boarded a sailing boat. Now their destination has a railroad (with what looks like a diesel locomotive) and all of the tech that requires. I wonder if the railroad is around because of its proximity to the city with all the Red Gaters? Those who come through the Gate bringing their knowledge with them?

Superjustinbros

oooooh

RebelVampire

adela and danbi's mom are sisters

Tenor | Shinavar

Oh god

RebelVampire

my plausible but crazy theory

Respheal

So the gates do space AND time shenanigans? Are the time flows of Earth and Keol linked?

keii4ii

The tech disparity was largely inspired by the situation in Korea in recent history! Countryside vs cities had huuuuge differences, like different worlds

Respheal

Or will the gate sometimes grab a person from like....the distant past or future

mathtans

Oh, I like when the real world is mirrored in ways one doesn't necessarily realize.

RebelVampire

that is a good question res

SevereWxEddie

@keii4ii ahhhhhhhhhhh

mathtans

Res: Maybe Ethan returns only to become his own dad?

Superjustinbros

Now I want to see that happen

Oh snap

Tenor | Shinavar

Math: GGGGGGGGG

I debaed that once but I couldn't work it out

Superjustinbros

Paradox, much?

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

@Respheal that is a good question, makes me think about portal travelling in a new way

keii4ii

That actually has huge implications with THIS story

Not canon but if it were

Ethan being his own dad, I mean

Draco Plato

that'd be awesome

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

LOL why does it reminds me of.. a film somewhere. can't remember it. Maybe I'm thinking of Back to the Future

Superjustinbros

"My future self is my daddy"

keii4ii

"When I grow up, I wanna be just like my daddy!"

Superjustinbros

XD

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

then oh shit... wished too hard

Superjustinbros

Pretty mcuh that

Draco Plato

you are your daddy

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

NOOOO *epic screams

Draco Plato

then you're like damn i sucked as my own dad

and now i have nobody to blame but myself

Superjustinbros

This talk

Draco Plato

that sounds like something i'd write, lol

Superjustinbros

@mathtans you are so good at this

RebelVampire

haha im gonna be honest, i entertained the idea of ethan being his own grandfather for a bit

as a theory

Draco Plato

i did too for a moment in the beginning, lol

Tenor | Shinavar

Futurama proved it can be set up ?shot

RebelVampire

but i was like "no no its probalby just ptsd. probably"

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

omg.. I love how this convo became a paradox XD

Draco Plato

and then i thought naaaaaaah they won't go there

Respheal

the cats in the cradle with the silver spoon, l-little boy blue...and the--the--

Kabocha

Ethan's real name is Fry.

Superjustinbros

inb4 let's paradox this world even further

SevereWxEddie

YAAAAAASSSSS

keii4ii

My brain is exploding

Superjustinbros

Boil, Grill, or fry?

RebelVampire

i did wonder if keol was just korea of the long forgotten past though. as a theory to explain the connection

Draco Plato

ah that could be

Superjustinbros

Maybe, i'd believe it if that was the case

SevereWxEddie

Wibbly wobbly timey wimey shenanigans ensued? I thought that at first too.

keii4ii

I haven't shown the map yet, but the geography is very different

Superjustinbros

oooh!?

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

Hmm that is plausible, if Keol is an ancient Korea.. although I have to look it up

mathtans

Originally as I started reading I did wonder if it was still like Earth. But enough stuff happened pretty soon to dispell that notion.

Superjustinbros

I googled Keol and I jsut got things related to music

keii4ii

Keol is way bigger than Korea ever was, for one thing

mathtans

That language connection thing is really interesting though. I wonder if humans get sucked in who don't speak Korean and are kind of screwed.

keii4ii

Yeah, Ethan would've had an even harder time if he didn't speak any Korean

Megaparsec

I suspect most of the people here did cross over from Earth at one point, because of the language and physical similarity. Possibly some kind of super-Gate pulling in a whole group of people?

Joichi [Lavender Tea]

YESS, i thought about that too, going; dang I envy you Ethan. I wouldn't be able to speak to ANYONE at all if I were in Keol

Megaparsec

In the far past of both worlds

Kabocha

Did the Rencho also speak Korean?

SevereWxEddie

@mathtans yes, didn't the lady with the M&Ms say she had that problem? (Her actual name escapes me)

keii4ii

Renchos speak their own languages in their home world, and have to pick up Korean when they come to Keol

Superjustinbros

lol

keii4ii

Same with Elyeos

Though Inductors are required to learn at least some basic phrases in the most common Elyeo language

Tenor | Shinavar

Yeah like 'You're under arrest' /shot

Superjustinbros

Do there exist translators in Keol?

RebelVampire

darn you geography. maybe keol is another dimension of earth where history took a different course entirely

keii4ii

I'm sure there are some?

mathtans

SevereW: I think that's later than I got to. ^_^;

keii4ii

like Lushaka still speaks the Rencho home world tongue, and could interpret if needed

SevereWxEddie

Ah, that'd do it.

keii4ii

The blue speech balloons were the Rencho language

when he was talking to Mr. Jaguar

Superjustinbros

oooh~

do I hear exparimenting with speech ballons with different visuals?

RebelVampire

on a side note i was sad for ethan that he found a fellow earthling...only they didnt really speak english

Superjustinbros

I always like when comics do that.

RebelVampire

that would be such a huge letdown for anyone(edited)

keii4ii

Note he had to switch to Korean for "arrows" and "archers" because Renchos don't have those words in their native languages

Darkhalo4321

ooooo

Kabocha

Yeah, I notice Ethan's text color changes if he needs to use an English word too

SevereWxEddie

That's a really neat method, by the way

Kabocha

and then Danbi's got a wispier textbubble to indicate his voice being very.... I dunno, soft? Scratchy? In my head it sounds somewhat raspy.

SevereWxEddie

Of telling readers what language is being used

Draco Plato

danbi's smoker voice XD

Superjustinbros

lol

keii4ii

Danbi is special

mathtans

Agreed. In the Korean version, is just the English words used, I wonder?

Superjustinbros

What would a speech bubble of someone sleepy look like(edited)

keii4ii

@SevereWxEddie Thanks! It's not a perfect solution but it works, and I'm happy enough with that

SevereWxEddie

You're welcome!

keii4ii

@mathtans I used a different font for English words in the Korean version. Wasn't doing the color thing at that time

Superjustinbros

oooh

mathtans

Before we close, I just want to say the colouring and shading and stuff is freaking amazing. High frequency of posts but also such quality.

Superjustinbros

Seconding this.

SevereWxEddie

Thirding

keii4ii

Thank you!

SevereWxEddie

The art is freaking gorgeous!

Superjustinbros

I'd like to say in personal thoughts- good luck with the story, @keii4ii. You got some really awesome plotlines and setpieces backed up with some great characterization and character designs and I hope it only gets bigger form there.

keii4ii

wait

Are CTPs allowed to end without a ship discussion

Superjustinbros

Especially something with lots of themes based on Korea.

Kabocha

OMG!

Darkhalo4321

I HAVE A SHIP

Kabocha

Lu/Ethan

Superjustinbros

I HEAR DSHIPS

Darkhalo4321

YES

Superjustinbros

FOUR MINUTE SHIP DISCUSSION

Tenor | Shinavar

I can't ship Ethan

keii4ii

The naval forces have been summoned

Tenor | Shinavar

It hurts too much

Darkhalo4321

Yeah, Ethan is a bit.... Not shippable RIGHT YET

Kabocha

Well, the naval was what he was focusing on

:'3

Darkhalo4321

But he's growing and I'm excited for the man he'll be later on!

Tenor | Shinavar

EXACTLY

HE'S TOO INNOCENT

SevereWxEddie

Well, the lack of navel forces was apparent in that one comic

Darkhalo4321

for now

keii4ii

Ethan's not quite emotionally ready for a long term, committed relationship yet

Kabocha

ANYWAY, ETHAN/LU IS THE SHIP I AM ON BOARD WITH

yet

Darkhalo4321

yet

Tenor | Shinavar

TBH I enjoy the idea of Danbi/Lu

Respheal

yet

Tenor | Shinavar

Super passive with a fucking troll

Superjustinbros

Shall we set sail? ;3c

Kabocha

Rebel it is super important that you italicise those yets

Tenor | Shinavar

+ Lu would protect Danbi who may be doomed to a life in prison

Tenor | Shinavar

he's already a dick who doesn't listen to orders

mathtans

I wondered if Ethan and Danbi would go somewhere. Maybe ship Ethan and the Queen? Calling it now.

Tenor | Shinavar

Just pocket the boy and go bouncing speedily away once healed /shot

RebelVampire

i sit on the Lu/Ethan ship myself. dont care about ethan's innocence the googly eyes are there

Kabocha

Math, you missed the Ethan is the Queen theory

Respheal

The "Ethan no" moments

Kabocha

or will be the Queen

Tenor | Shinavar

...Lu leaning on Danbi with this knowing ass smile at Ad, too like "Yeah. I know what he is. Does it bother you we're dating?"

Draco Plato

i was more for danbi/ethan but super don't think that's going to happen now XD

Respheal

But also catching Ethan when he was passing out after accidentally dokkabi'ing himself?

mathtans

Kabocha: Oops. Ethan shipped with himself then.

Tenor | Shinavar

-Talking myself more into this ship, fuck-

Darkhalo4321

YES ( to res's comment)(edited)

Tenor | Shinavar

-I can't draw this, the pain is real-

Kabocha

lmao

Superjustinbros

Heehee~

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB END!

Sadly, this wraps up this week’s Thursday Book Club chat for now. Thank you so much to everyone for reading and joining us! We want to give a special thank you to keiiii, as well, for making Heart of Keol. If you liked the comic, make sure to support keiiii’s efforts however you’re able to~!

Read and Comment: http://www.heartofkeol.com/

keiiii’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/keii4ii

keiiii’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/keiiii4

Comic Tea Party- Thursday Book Club

Next week’s Thursday Book Club will be about Finding Home by Hari. For participants, you have the next week to read as much of the comic as you would like~! We hope to see you on Thursday, October 4th, from 5PM to 7PM PDT for the chat in #thursday_bookclub!

Comic’s Main Site: https://tapas.io/series/FindingHome