#anyway good lord it's always so nerve-racking using the school bathrooms | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

surveys-at-your-service · 5 years ago

Text

Survey #227

“it’s my party, and i’ll die when i want to.”

Where do you hang your towel to dry after showering? On the rack that's on the bathroom door. What kind of mouse pad do you have? It's just a simple black one. Do you brush your hair with a comb or a brush? A comb. If you had a choice to be a unicorn or mermaid which would it be? Probably a unicorn? Idk. I think unicorns are cooler, but I guess being a mermaid (as depicted in the media, however) would be fun. Can you do a hand stand? No. If you were the opposite sex, how would you style your hair? Fuck man emo hair is the way to go don't even try to change my mind. What movie are you embarrassed to admit you’ve watched? None, really. Would you rather spin upside down going 30 miles or drop 400 ft. into water? Well, dropping 400 ft. into water would literally result in your body exploding upon impact with the water; at that height (I'm pretty sure that's high enough, anyway), the water's surface would be like concrete at the velocity you land. Soooo, the former. I'd like to live. What's your favorite shape? "I don’t really have one. I guess the shape of women’s bodies? Like, all kinds of them? Whooooopsie gaysie!" <<<< HAHAHA YOOOOOOOOO THIS. If you were put in a room with nothing except for a pencil and paper, what would you write? Doodle meerkats or write poetry. Do you use deodorant? Does anyone who can afford it and in America not? I'm ignorant to if that's a societal standard in other places in the world. Do you think you’ve grown as a person since this time last year? I honestly don't know. If you could change one physical trait about yourself, what would it be? Can I PLEASE weigh around 120 again??? Have you ever gone out with someone you didn’t like? Well, I didn't not like him. I kinda had a crush on him in high school for a brief period, but we lost communication throughout school. When he asked me out a few years ago, I only agreed to it as a test, I guess. He was a good person, and again, I had liked him. It was a "get to know one another (again)" thing. It was still very, very unlike me, though; I usually date people only when I know I'm into them. Looking back, it really was mostly an "I don't want to hurt his feelings" thing. What are some of your morals? "I wouldn’t say I have any unique morals or things like that. I just…don’t do harm and treat people like I’d want them to treat me." <<<< Pretty much this. I don't see my morals as unordinary. Just hopefully the usual good person. Would you ever take a bullet for your significant other? I wouldn't even fucking hesitate. Do you like your smile, or are you unhappy with it? I hate it. I look high when I smile. My eyes squint too much. If you were starving on a freezing mountain, would you eat your friend? No. Some things aren't worth living after. Out of all your friends, who can you count on the most? Sara. Do people who say they’re depressed bother you? I actually don't think any other survey question I have EVER come across boils my blood like this one. Fuck no they don't. Depression isn't a goddamn choice. Rot the fuck in Hell if depressed people "bother" you. Their mental illness is far, far, far fucking more an inconvenience to the victim than to you. What do you think of hunting? By this point in my animal/wildlife conservation and welfare eruption, I'm perfectly open in calling you a goddamn asshole if you hunt for any reason other than survival. There is something seriously wrong in your head if you get fucking pleasure out of ending a life without reasonable cause. Damn man, this surveys getting me fired up, lmao. White lies aren’t dangerous; true or false? They can be. Do you pretend your crush is with you when you’re home alone? I mean, I can daydream? But I don't actually like, pretend they're present. How many times do you go behind your parents’ back weekly? Never. Do you tend to go for people older or younger than you? Older or the same age. I don't mind if they're slightly younger though, so long as they're of legal age of course. If you became a doctor, would you help your patients kill themselves? I am 110% in favor of assisted suicide when a patient is diagnosed with a terminal malady. Forcing a human being to suffer 'til their inexorable death via the hands of their illness is, to me, torture. I genuinely do think I'm a very compassionate and gentle person, so while it would be ABSOLUTELY heartbreaking and probably scarring, I actually feel I'd be a good option for a doctor euthanizing a qualified patient. Are you good at haunted houses, or do you scream your head off? I haven't been to very many at all, actually. The one I remember that I've attended a few times, I handled just fine. They're fun to me. If you’ve seen it, what did you think of the Twilight movie? I didn't watch it, so I really can't make a fair judgment, but from what I've seen and heard (so take this with a grain of salt), the acting is horrid and the romance is very poorly composed. Would you rather be called babe or darling? The latter. Does the movie Titanic make you cry? Oh Lord, yes. We (surprisingly) watched it during one of my psych hospital stays, and even some of the guys were teary-eyed. What is your favorite thing to do on your phone? Play PokemonGO when I'm in enough of an urban area to be able to lmao. Which Disney princess resembles you the most? *shrugs* Which fairytale seems closest to your life story? Rapunzel being trapped in her home, lmao. What color was your first phone? Hm... I believe it was blue? Was your first phone a flip phone? I don't believe so; it slid upwards. What is your favorite pizza parlor? I'm a basic bitch that finds Domino's to be the bomb diggity. What is an old website that closed down that you miss? Hm... I'm not sure. Well, the site itself didn't close down, the Animal Planet's Meerkat Manor forum and games are dearly missed by me. Have you ever had an embarrassing period story? If so, what happened? Not that I recall, thankfully. What was your worst experience in high school? My depression. How much did your senior prom dress cost you? I don't remember, but I know it wouldn't have been all that expensive. Did you cry at your high school graduation? I only teared up very slightly. Did you cry at your college graduation (if applicable)? N/A, but I'm sure I will out of so much pride and joy. Do your parents try to stop you from chasing your dreams? Hell no. My parents are so, so supportive Who is a former friend that you wish would come back into your life? I miss Megan so, so much. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship? Two. What instrument did you play in the marching band? I wasn't in the marching band, but rather the normal one. I played the flute. Who got kicked off of your favorite talent show that you were mad about? Okay, so I remember one year, there was this very quiet, shy, and darkly-styled young man with a love for metal on America's Got Talent. Everyone was expecting a screamo mess, and then he belts out FUCKING BEAUTIFUL opera. Everyone lost it, myself included, and the sweetheart started crying. Sadly, he was eliminated the next round because his nerves got to him, poor thing. Do you own the entire series on DVD of any TV show? If so, what? Meerkat Manor. What show did you always want to be on when you were a kid? None, really. Can you tell the difference between Mary-Kate and Ashley? I think I could as a kid? I haven't seen them in forever and half. Who is your favorite set of twins? *shrugs* What is the grossest thing you have ever vomited up? Idk? Have you ever thrown up in public, in front of someone else? If yes, was it embarrassing? Yes, but I was in kindergarten, so it wasn't too embarrassing. I was just surprised. Did you ever take your dog to school? Whoa... this brought back memories. I believe I did bring Teddy to school one day in elementary school... 5th grade, maybe? I can't recall what the occasion was, though. Name one person you know who had a baby in high school. I don't remember her name. Describe your dream wedding in three words. Autumnal, personal, memorable. What do you hate the most about summer? The fucking heat. What is your favorite thing to do in a swimming pool? Just swim around. Which part of your body is the most muscular? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA BOY I couldn't even GUESS. My legs are recovering from muscle atrophy, so OBVIOUSLY not them. My arms aren't impressive. Neither is my stomach at all. I honestly don't know. What was the last race you ran called? Brittany??????????????? running a?????????????????? r a c e??????????????????????????????? Which major holiday is closest to your birthday? Valentine's Day. Do you find kite flying boring? I haven't done that since I was a kid, but BOY did I LOOOOOVE it back then! I'd probably still find it kinda fun. What is your favorite musical? Musicals make me cringe. Have you ever seen a Broadway show? No. What is the best summer camp you have ever been to? Well, I remember as a kid, one of the vacation Bible schools I went to was pretty fun. It was Hawaiian-themed. Have you ever ran a cash register? Never. Ever. Fucking. Again. Do you like the feeling in your stomach on a big drop on a roller coaster? I've never been on one, but I hate even just the sensation you get when the elevator goes up or down. I immediately get dizzy and nauseous. It's so bad that I even experience this in video games if you have to jump from a large height. What is your favorite roller coaster? N/A How and when were you baptized, if applicable? Hell if I remember. Have you been baptized more than once? No. Would you rather paint or carve a pumpkin? Carve it. Have you decorated for fall yet this year? No. Do you own pumpkin earrings? No, but now I want some. That sounds so cute. Have you ever asked someone to be your Valentine? I mean, not really? I've had s/os on Valentine's Days, so being each other's is kinda just... a given. What was your favorite video game to play with your brother? My older half-bro, when he lived with us anyway, used to play this mercenary game (I don't remember the name) that I LOVED watching him play. Idk why. Really when he played anything I would sit right beside him and watch. What computer game did you used to play all the time? Amazon Trail 3 was my cocaine, hunny. Do you like the name Ellery? I guess it's kinda cute... but it reminds me of celery. Do you find cemeteries pretty? "Pretty" isn't the word I'd use, but I find them aesthetically pleasing. They're more like... mysterious, enchanting. Does your phone screen freeze a lot? Often enough... Who is the better cook in your household? My mom. What by your definition is the naughtiest thing you have done? I guess the time I was entirely naked and him just in boxers going the fuck at each other on the chaise in the living room when we were home alone one night. Or maybe when we "slept" in my sister's room one night (can't remember exactly why) and we just fooled around the entire night instead. He came on her bed multiple times, hence why I guess it fits "naughtiest." (Yes, yes, he cleaned it up, calm down.) I honestly haven't done anything too wild. What is one thing you’d never want your parents to find out? The Joel situation I've told before. Which room of your house are you in? Mine. How many blankets do you sleep under? One thick one. I miss my school lunch menu.. what’s the fave thing on yours? Okay real talk, my high school chicken sandwiches were The Good Shit. Do you like your best friend's parents? Could you even tell me their names? I love them, and I could, but it's not my business to share that online. Anything silly that annoys you? (I hate hearing nails being clipped) I really hate people going in/out the opposite door. Why are you where you are right now? I absolutely have to take a mental health day from school, so I'm home in my room. Did you used to watch Blues Clues? Of course. What's your opinion on people wearing high heels to school? I feel very sorry for your feet, aha. But I don't care if you do, go for it. What difficulty do you play on Guitar Hero? I used to play like, everything on expert, but now if I do, I can barely manage expert on most and have to do hard. Do you stutter when you get nervous? BADLY. You’re at the grocery store, what 3 fruits do you get? Strawberries, apples, grapes. If you died next week, what would be the cause of death? Sleep deprivation lmao. Love these night terrors + nightmares. What do you think about dating websites? Whatever. I definitely think there are better, safer ways, but it's not a huge deal. Just go into it with a genuine heart and mind of wanting to find love. There's nothing wrong with wanting a partner to enjoy life with. Do you wear contacts or glasses? I wear glasses. I wish I could do contacts, but noooo sir. I had them very briefly again earlier this year, but I just couldn't; all I could do was feel them there, mainly the weighted one in my left eye because my vision is so bad in it. They just bugged me too much. What is one memory you have from elementary school? Making our own butter in 4th grade came to me first. We walked through school singing this annoying song while we shook our jars. Do you own a pair of converses? A few. How many fridges are in your house? One. Are you easy to get along with? I hope so, but idk. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? She's over 800 miles away lmao. What kind of people are you attracted to? Platonically or romantically? Well, with either, I'm drawn to compassion, a tranquil mind, empathy, gentleness, romance if we're talking romantic attraction, a deep thinker, wisdom, creativity, uniqueness/individuality, just, funny, thoughtful, charitable, concerned with nature/love and kindness to animals, intelligence... There's a lot. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? I don't see why I wouldn't be. Do you like it when people play with your hair? My hair's too short now for that. It'd feel weird. I used to like it, though. Do you think there is life on other planets? Probably. Do you like bubble baths? I don't enjoy baths period. Who are you most comfortable around? My mom, or Sara. Depends on the subject matter. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? No. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? I wouldn't. I'm strictly monogamous and to me would feel like cheating. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Yeah. What do you say during awkward silences? Nothing, but I panic inside. What are you paranoid about? My loved ones secretly hating me or leaving me, being raped, people thinking I'm weird (and not in a good way), stuff like that. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? I don't think so. Been suspended/expelled? For what? No. Been arrested? For what? No. Craving something? What? Nothing. What color are your towels? They're varied. How many pillows do you sleep with? Two. Favorite animal? MEERKATS. Opossums are #2. Favorite character from Mean Girls? I don't remember the characters at all. Favorite actress? Betty White. Favorite actor? BITCH Markiplier, lmao. But okay if you mean a "real" actor, probably Johnny Depp. Last time you were in an elevator? Thursday when I had to go upstairs to my Writing class. It's absolutely humiliating, but I can't make it up two flights of stairs due to my muscle atrophy without people asking if I'm okay. Even going down is dangerous for me because my legs ABSOLUTELY QUAKE and I have to go extremely slow. I go down via stairs anyway though for practice. I'm going to fall one day, I know it. I’m sure we all know what your name is… so, tell us what your boss’ name is? N/A Do you actually read your friend’s surveys, or do you just copy paste them and fill them out yourself? Yes; I love learning about my friends. When you were a kid, which comic strip was your favorite? I didn't care for them. Would you feel guilty about cheating on your taxes if you got away with it? Well yeah. Have you ever thought about getting your lip pierced? It is pierced. What woke you up this morning? A nightmare that resulted in me screaming almost the loudest I ever have in my life. My throat hurt for quite a while. What was your favorite sweet as a child? Reese's cups. Still are. Do you own a lunch box? Yeah. How many times a day do you brush your teeth? Once, oops. If there was a fire, what would you take with you? The very first thing I'd grab would be Teddy, then Roman, Venus, and then my laptop, probably. How many people have the same middle name as you? The majority of the white female population lmao. Does your house have a white picket fence? The backyard does. Have you ever needed to call the police? 911 when we thought my mom was having a heart attack. What are you best at? Writing, I guess.

#survey #quiz #questions #random #bored

4 notes · View notes

sinfulblueberry · 8 years ago

Text

Sing Sweet Seraphim

a prologue of sorts to the vague as fuck hint on what im working on that i dropped on this blog the other day, bc what else would i do when i haven’t actually studied properly in the last 3 months and it’s less than 13 hours at the time of editing this until my first exam

[a southern gothic-based fic with a hint of murder mystery]

It was an accident, Mark swears. An accident. An unfortunate incident. An unintentional incident, if a variation in words is an option. He’s not a murderer, he tells himself. He’s not a murderer, he insists, he didn’t do it with the intent of killing. He didn’t intend for anything to happen at all. He’s not a murderer.

The boy he knows from his french class had started yelling at him for being out of dorms after lights out, insisting he go back to his room or Mr Edwards would be informed of his “late night trip”. Mr Edwards always had it out for him for whatever reasons that those in teaching positions do. One more phone call home and Mark would be sent straight to a military training camp.

(What was the boy himself doing out of his dorm as well? It’s not uncommon for people to sneak out after hours, especially with the mistake of the male and female dorms being in the same building. But he’d just been in the corridor as if waiting to catch the ones that do leave their room.)

The last thing Mark remembers after that is the hushed tone he tried to coax the other student into instead of getting them both into trouble, the brief scuffle between them, and the spindly limbs that had flailed rapidly approaching the cobblestone floor below the windowless gap.

“Oh fuck,” Mark’s voice had croaked when the initial shock slithered its way from his stomach to his throat. “Oh fuck, fuck.” He’s an asshole, sometimes, but not a murderer. He’d never purposely wield a weapon against one of his fellow students, never plot their demise for any reason, never push a boy barely scraping 17 years old out a window under the watchful eye of the Lord he’s quickly losing faith in.

He feels sick when he scrambles down the stairs to the raised, short staircase outside. One of the more religious students or teachers at the school would probably wax poetic, unaffected, about the boy’s wine red blood spilling out his skull, compare it to the hard candy his mother used to buy him on a Sunday afternoon. Spill lines about how he fell with grace, if they had witnessed his fall, his murder, his execution, his slaughter, and recite a line from the Bible about the Lord leading them beyond death, calling his death beautiful beyond anything else you could bear witness upon.

Instead, he feels sick from how the blood does spill from his skull, too much of it to let the boy walk away at all. How it mats his hair into sticky, twisted strands and travels thickly onto the cobblestone stair beneath his head, to stain the faded stone. How pale he is already, due to the cold and the brunt of the fall shocking his own body, how his face is tense with an expression of pain yet relaxed with the quick release of muscles. Mark feels sick that this happened under his own hand.

There’s a constant prattle in his head as he numbly drags the body through faded dirt and grass of the unused sports field, a chant of how it’s not his fault, not his fault the boy had fallen to his own fate. How even under the eyes of God, he is forgiven. It doesn’t help the block in his throat and the weight in his stomach.

Despite being a boarding school, natural landforms like the firm ground and pristine grass shifting to a marshy waste devoid of any grass at all during the winter season were something that can’t be helped. This part of the field was only used in summer and autumn when the dirt is piled back over before winter and spring can flood it with constant downpours again. Mark feels his skin crawl when he initially thanks God for the strange tip in the land, where the soaked, slippery mud turns into a drop in on itself and into a slope, leading to a fenced area of a nearby farmer’s land. It’s unused during this time of year and people rarely risk the slip of watery earth to sneak into the field, good for hiding a mistake like this.

The body tumbles, limp and lifeless, down the slope and near the barbed fence of the separated land. It gets packed with mud, previously pristine clothes clumped with the stains of its own blood and dirt. A tense shudder is repressed when he takes a parting glance towards the slope before moving on.

The blood beginning to stain the stone is still there when Mark treks back to the dorm building. (Where would it go anyway? Would God forgive him? Would he make this mess disappear as forgiveness for this admittance of sin?) He has enough dirt on his shoes to cover the whole damn stairs, let alone the two steps the liquid had spread onto. It’s messy and doesn’t help the nausea in his throat, but at least now it’s more suspect to somebody actually wandering after lights out instead of falling from the floor above. (Groundskeepers are tasked with keeping dirt off the stone, and if blood is somehow mixed within the copper-toned mess after being scrubbed down, Mark doesn’t hear a word of it.)

The incident doesn’t slip Mark’s mind once during the next few weeks. The body is still there when he checks it every week - sometimes more than once a week at first when the paranoia and talk of the boy missing from french class is rapidly spreading - and higher authority within the school assure the boy is with his family after a close relative’s passing.

It’s painfully obvious what happened when police from a few towns over are leaving the gates of the school, painful enough that Mark’s throat clasps up when the urge to yell open admittance about how he had killed the boy, pushed him out a window, begged for forgiveness with no answer from the Lord that is ignoring his prayers for the act he had performed. He turns to listen to Tyler’s bitter musing about the missing student instead and tries to swallow down the urge to throw up.

It’s fine. The boy is assumed to have actually ran off somewhere when no body is recovered. It’s fine, nobody goes near the fence in winter, it’s fine. Then suddenly it’s not. Prime suspects gathered from student information are questioned, the slope is fenced off with pegs and rope, corridors are occasionally seen with police officers now. It’s not fine anymore, Mark’s committed murder as much as he denies it and nobody knows who the culprit is but him, only know of the body.

A week comes and goes with the bustling gossip of the investigation. Mark’s on edge almost every minute when he’s not sleeping, and even then he’s plagued with his dreams of consequences, his mother’s disappointment, the boy’s family’s tears shed over their sweet child being murdered ruthlessly by one of his fellow classmates. If Tyler notices how often he escapes to the bathroom to throw up, he doesn’t say. The guilt racks him cold and flushed with a sweat at the same time, invisible needles prickling along his skin and meagre tears slipping down his cheeks when his throat burns and he tastes the bitter acidic remnants in his mouth.

He doesn’t know why they can’t just take the body already and help keep it from racking his thoughts. Surely that’s asking for the guilt of God to be pushed upon their shoulders for not paying proper respect to the dead. (He tries not to think too much about that reasoning.) But investigations are investigations and only the priest from the school chapel has the nerve to speak against leaving the body in the dirt for the wildlife.

Mark’s never felt worse for wear in the whole 17 years of existence and it only got worse - until the constant titters about the boy from french die down to hushed whispers. It was getting better. Forgiveness still wasn’t there, but he felt less queasy when anything but water passes his lips. He could sleep easier and lived without Tyler asking if he’s okay when morning comes.

It’s just getting better and the guilt is finally wearing away from the front of his mind when the uproar of the missing boy is brought back among the students again. The urge to throw up there and then at the breakfast table they’re sat at is becoming more and more of an urgency.

The body was reported missing from the scene at the early hours of that morning, and it’s certainly not like the boy can up and walk out of the situation, as if he can walk at all, can breathe at all, can only lay there in the mud, caked in dried dirt and blood and-so Mark tries not to think about the new information at hand and instead focuses on actually swallowing the mouthful of grainy porridge that sufficing as his breakfast.

9 notes · View notes