#anyway bro has just decided not to walk at all this week. i havent gotten any no glance passes with him for three whole days

[chiistarri]

done with him 🙏

[namuneulbo]

week eighty

this week was good mentally ig? idk my ocd has been really nice to me lately and my compulsions havent been as bad as they usually are which is nice. i hope this continues for a while at least.

monday was happy for me. wearing my fav bowie shirt helps too. its gotten a small spot now that didnt go away in the wash and ive frantically been putting a bunch of cleaning chemicals on it and hoping itll go away bc shit was expensive + its one of my fav shirts i own + its one of my comfiest shirts + ratio + ur mom.

we had a grunting workshop at school w the singer of finntroll which was super epic. hes so cool lol and i was just super excited ab getting the proper learn it and get feedback in real time so ik im not doing something bad to my vocal chords and throat and all that. he said i sounded good while we were trying some stuff out as a group so that boosted my ego a lot lol.

now,,,, exciting !!! thing !!!

me and my friends came back to school by the end of lunch break and who do i see as we walk in...?

w, of course!

i had said hi to him earlier iirc but i might be mixing up the days, anyways, i somehow managed to just walk up to him and talk to him. nothing crazy, i just asked him ab the paramore cover band stuff and being like “yooo, is it still happening or..?” and he was like “oh yeah, i still really want to do it, im just very busy atm” and i was like “ah, thats fine, i can help u out w anything if u want to. its fine if it gets a bit postponed too!” and he was all like “ah, thanks!”. that wasnt perfectly transcribed bc ive honestly forgotten a lot of the things that were said but those were the key points ig. i just got so nervous when talking to him lol i was just staring into his eyes the whole time which is super rare for me but ig i was so focused on what i had to say that i didnt even think of it but now all i remember is how green his eyes are and how cutely he smiled when he thanked me and i also feel like ive stood way too close to him although i dont think i did in reality but like considering all i remember are his eyes it feels as it ive stood too close. we had a cute lil bye sesh and then i ran to class. everyone was there already and i just sat next to c and smiled frantically. my friends had seen me walk up to him and thankfully they just walked to class wo me bc i wouldnt have done so,,, okay w them behind me, watching me try to talk to this silly lil guy. anyways, i explained as much as i could considering we were still in a room full of ppl who know this guy lol. i showed how shakey i was to c and they laughed ab it. i remember going to fill my water bottle and just jumping up and down in excitement the second i locked the bathroom door and my hand shaking like crazy as i held my water bottle under the streaming water.

tuesday! the workshop continued! afterwards we were in a smaller group of people and got more personal feedback. he said i did it really well and that i have the technique down so im super happy ab that.

wednesday was iconic. there was this party for the uni part of my school that ppl had been talking ab lots. as far as ik it was like a lil party for just the uni students where they were performing for each other. w was playing there even though hes not in uni yet. he played w his tribute band (which ik bc i saw him listening to a playlist w the name of the party and it was just filled w the police songs and it was made by the bassist in that band, who i later followed on spotify too hehe hes so cool and his music taste is so good bro?). so thered be that performance thing party and then an after party in our school party place thingy in the basement.

since it was wednesday, it was music quiz as well so i was ofc going to that. i knew i could get into the after party so i decided to freshen myself up a bit extra before going out for the extremely tiny chance that w would be at the party.

for context, w is NOT a party person. he doesnt drink and he also just,, doesnt ever go out really?? hes just like me fr but anyways, i thought today he might actually be there bc of the performance thingy. like yk, he might as well go? i thought?

so i first go to a short pregame at ds place. i got there so late that i didnt drink anything before going to the bar. i watched them speedrun a drinking game before we left to the bar.

once we were at the bar we had to sit further in bc of how full it was. i prefer sitting closer to the enterance bc the volumes lower, anyways, vs parents were there which was quite fun ig haha they were really nice and his mom was so cute so it was fun. the quiz this week was so hard though, the songs were so weird and the trivia qs were just a bunch of statistics that no one would know. i was so hungry so i decided to not drink anything until the afterparty bc i didnt want to throw up. vs dad bought us salmiac shots though which i obviously could not refuse, theyre my fav. afterwards, i went home and devoured some cheese and tomato sandwiches and then i went back to ds place. we stayed there until we got a green light to leave and go to the after party.

earlier at the bar i had asked c how big of a chance it would be that w would be at the after party. she confidently laughed and said “like, 10%. absolutely no way hes there, sorry girl!”. i try to persuade her being like “hm but think ab it!” and shes like “yea, its a bigger chance than other days but dont get ur hopes up too much”. i ask the same thing of l. they say “oh god, no way. he wont be there. 95% sure he wont be there. no way.”. personally, i thought there was like a 40% chance hed be there.

we arrive at the after party. me and l were by ourselves pretty much. we scan the place and no w is to be seen. i get a bit disappointed although nothing crazy since i knew he wouldnt ACTUALLY be there but yk, i still had my hopes up. me and l sit down in a couch by the bar. i turn to them and kinda pout being like a bit sarcastically overdramatic and say “not even ds here!”. linnea looks at me and points behind me w a small gesture and goes: “look”.

i see d walking confidently towards the bar. n and w walking softly behind him. me and l just stare at each other w wide eyes and the second they walked out the room we burst out in laughter bc both the chance and the timing was so crazy. we get up to see where they went but dont stalk too intently. we went back to the bar room after a while and sit down on another couch and talk w s. s is super talkative and fun so hes very appreciated when ur feeling a bit lost at parties and gatherings. we sit and talk w him and i see d, n and w walking back in the room. they walk past and i stare lovingly at w. they sit down on the couch me and l sat on earlier and w sat right where i sat. ty god!

i can see w nicely from where im sitting and its like a side angle but like far enough back that he cant see me staring unless he turns his head so im taking this opportunity to STARE. i analyze his outfit. hes wearing black shoes instead of the usual white nikes ones or the yellow vans. his long brown hair falls cutely under his hat. his black tee is once again hugging his biceps so ,, attractively. at one point he throws his head back and keeps it there for a while. he was probably tired. it was 1 am tbf. i feel quite bad saying its hot in a way bc i do feel bad for him if he was just feeling tired and wanted to go home but like,,, bro put his whole adams apple on display for me, a firm lover of big adams apples, i just couldnt help but die on the inside. so hot. i had never noticed how big his adams apple was until that. new feature to admire hihi!

i watch him scroll through facebook and insta as his friends talk w others. im far away enough that i cant tell what the posts r or anything. hes so interesting. ive always seen him as super talkative and outgoing but hes not really? i think he might just be an introvert whose social battery had run out. i think we might be quite similar socially actually. i do think hes less shy than me, he seems that way at least but i do think hes similar to me where i just have better and worse days and somedays im super talkative and talk to random ppl more easily and somedays im quite quiet and barely talk to ppl ik. hes also like, alone, a lot. i feel a bit bad for him. i think it might be by choice? he does talk to ppl, its not that, but he tends to walk around school alone. ig its bc hes not actually in school but just doing civilian work.

i slept a total of four hours before my shift the next morning. two at night, got ready in one hour and slept for another two before leaving for work. i was surprisingly awake at work though. like, yeah, i could feel the lack of sleep but it wasnt terrible. i did some grocery shopping afterwards.

friday! last official day of school. i just have my graduation left. we didnt have anything important in the morning but i went to school to see if w was there. he wasnt in the morning TT i followed l to the shop and they went to buy coffee then went to the library to study. i went back to school for a short bit to see if hed be there, he wasnt. i talked to c briefly and told her ab why i was in school so early and she gave me a lil look and scoffed but it was funny. i went home and drank a pepsi and got some studying done before heading back for lunch. during lunch break i see w for the first time. i was too shy to say hi though.

our schedule said the afternoon was a surprise so no one knew what we were doing. we all met in the main hallway of the music building and then went out. they left while i was in the bathroom so i had to run and catch up w them. theyd gone quite far so it was quite embarrassing running all across the town square. everyone was guessing where we were going as we walked. i walked w c, l and l. l joked that we were going to see one of the schools alumni play in the park and i believed him for a good minute before they told me it was just a joke. i guessed we were going to play mini golf and i was right lol. we played mini golf and it was so hot outside bro. i was wearing a black hoodie and black jeans so i was DYING. it was fun for a bit but i dont really enjoy it so it got boring quickly since it was so hot too and its just too repetitive and w a big team it takes ages to finish.

after that we had a music quiz (or two in a way, one w tv show themes and one w normal songs) in the park w some ice cream. i was sad we didnt get to pick teams but i got to be in the same team as c at least. we took one last class group pic together too :’)

there was this small culture event starting in the evening. it was a festival that lasted all weekend. it had a small participation fee and it was even cheaper w the student “pay what u can” ticket. i only went on friday and saturday bc the only event on sunday was the same art exhibition they displayed the entire weekend. i was pleasantly surprised by friday bc i had higher expectations ab saturday but ended up liking fridays programmes more.

on friday, me and l got there around 7 pm and wHO DO I SEE AS SOON AS I GET THROUGH THE DOOR??? not w BUT both of his parents. see, ive stalked his parents instas LIGHTLY. i felt weird ab going too deep but ive just seen the pics hes tagged in from his parents instas so i just know his parents names and what they look like. i knew his mom had some project there bc her name was on all of the posters. i ‘fangirl’ a bit to l and we go on w the exhibition, enjoying the epic art. the first programme is a 30 minute sesh of video art on the screen. i love video art a lot, its always my fav when at a museum. the first one was actually the one ws mom made, or well, she was the performer in it and i was just staring bc she looked SO YOUNG. she has gray hair but in the video it was blonde and she just looked so youthful i was questioning whether i was tripping and just seeing things. shes such a cute lady. it was a really cool video of her doing,,, interpretive dancing? silly gestures? in the forest. it was so pretty. afterwards she held a little speech and it was really interesting and agh such a cute lady like actually so loveable. i love humans sm.

the second video was a video of someone manically vacuuming while dressed in underwear. it was silly but it was nice w something less intense in-between.

the third was quite a short one of a robot speaking ab how it doesnt feel feelings and stuff. kinda scary.

the fourth one i cried at lol idk if it was bc i felt emotional or if it was eyeliner getting into my eye or the bright light coming from the screen but i cried lol. it was another forest video. a person standing in the forest, trying to rip their sweater off but not managing to do it. there was a repeating phrase in swedish in the back but i cant remember the exact quote but it was something like “taking off the body that is you”. so beautiful.

id say the last one had the most elements to it. white (like, literally, fully white clothing, hair and makeup) person walking around in unsaturated landscapes. v pretty.

afterwards there was a dj thing that we decided to skip to go to the bar. we went to see a rage against the machine cover band but i had to leave quite early bc i was so socially drained and also, i forgot my ear protection so i was scared to stand there wo it. im so scared of getting tinnitus, esp as a musician.

saturday! i met up w e in the early afternoon. shes got a summer job at h&m and im so jealous. we went to some garden thrift shops (?) in the older part of town. such pretty gardens and i ended up getting a dark blue flannel and three glass bottles to put flowers in. v happy!

we later went to a café and chatted for an hour or so. i had an iced latte and a mudcake and it was so yum ! we then went walking around some shops and then went out for ice cream from the ice cream stand. theyve changed to the yucky soft serve and im so sad. only mcdonalds has the good soft serve nowadays TT

we spent the last hour or so at my place and did nothing really. i just touched up my makeup and gave her a try-on haul of the flannel. i feel really bad in a way. im so sure she likes me and it feels so mean now that i have a crush on someone else. i liked her a LITTLE. like i was a bit intrigued by the idea back in september but she didnt seem to have that then. i do think she deserves someone who gets as much butterflies as she does when theyre w each other though. ive realized thats usually the best way to make me realize whether i like someone or not. i need butterflies! such a good feeling!

in the evening me, c, l and ls ‘friend’ e went to the event again to join a queer culture quiz. we SUCKED, it was truly humbling. e was super nice and it was fun getting to speak english for a bit. after the quiz i joined c to the store to buy some food. i didnt get anything bc i wasnt THAT hungry and i knew wed go out for food later anyways. we met i on the way there and then again in the store. c and i sat in the park while they ate their food and then we went back to the venue. we missed some performance thingy but i wasnt too interested in it anyways. we came just in time for an elvis impersonator. it was surely,,, something. me and c were both very shocked over the ,,, quality... the thing is it was supposed to be satire but like it was just,,, actually bad. the costume was cool though. we then listened to some ambient music woah. i thought it would be a bit different but it was alright. c had to leave earlier bc she got overwhelmed by it and me, e and l left once some more ppl started leaving. nobody seemed to enjoy it that much. we stood outside and talked w s for a while. at one point a bunchhhh of ppl started leaving which was quite funny to watch happen.

we left after a bit and we went to get fries and the hot guy was at the cash register!!!!!!! super happy. me and c fangirled a bit over how hot he was.

we ate the fries in the park and i was feeling a bit woah ab the fact that we were IN the park so late at night. its a big park and its kinda known for being sketchy at night but we walked out unstabbed so id call it a success.

lastly, we went to the bar. it was filled w ppl and the festival held its after party there. it was basically a rave so i didnt really go to the dance floor but i stood outside passively smoking for hours instead. we were kind of awkward bc no one wanted to go up and talk to ppl. i suggested we couldve gone and talk to h and s and their friends or c and d and after suggesting c and d, c (my friend c, not this guy c) scoffed and went like “what would we talk ab w c and d? smoking weed?” and i was like “yeah? lets smoke w them yo!” and then they just ignored it lol but i kept talking ab going smoking w d throughout the night and i think i was the only one who found it funny. good thing i was sober bc i think if i wouldve been drunk i mightve even actually walked up to d and been like “yo,,, ik weve never exchanged a single word before but ur really cool, love ur bass stuff dawg (+ i have a massive crush on ur drummer friend), wanna get high?”

i left after a while bc i got bored bc my chingus didnt want to talk w anyoneeeee. fell asleep and woke up w a cold and its so bad atm. my entire body hurts and im so weak. work was so bad bc of it and idk,,, i might have to call in sick next shift. well see.

ive been listening to a lot of the police this past week so obviously...

sotw: the police - every breath you take

[idjitlili]

Thor,Son of Odin

Thorin x Modern!reader

Summary:Imagine being apart of the company ;and calling Thorin,Thor the god of Thunder.

a/n i hate wattpad it deleted 6 hours of work on this ,bloody bullshit and i fell over in that time todays going amazing, I passed my gsces though.

Word count:3277

Okay ,okay ,let's do this one last time. You Y/n L/n ,some how ended up in Tolkiens universe,the hobbit.Bro you was beyond freaked out to wake up snuggling up with some dude,practially laying on top of him,his arms around you holding you. His hair dark ,long ,silky almost,his face wore but structured,his body muscular,yet some what stumpy. Your face so close to his ,as ou come to reality ,you do not know who in bloody hell this man was.

You had brought your hand up his his cheek ,poking it once ,nothing,again,slight groan but nothing really,again his time mulitple harsh pokes ,finally his ocean coloured eyes shot open. They looked into your e/c ones you screamed then he screamed. Pushing yourself of his out of his grip.

"who are you?" he had shouted ,in shock really.

"no! Who in bloody earth are you? and why were we snuggling? Kidnapper! HELP"  you had stood up ,your face turning in every direction to see where in gods earth you were,just all you could see was forest and a bunch of men,who surrounded you and the strange blue eyed man,looking at you strangely. You looked around again and you saw a man that was dressed as a wizard , he looked like cogsworth,damn he really does.

"oh I get it. I will rather die than take part in your orgies!" you had shouted again ,laughing in horror after ,you were very much terrified in this moment.

"I'm sorry ,what orgies? what gives you that idea?" the smallest one hadspoken up pushing passed the others ,you had pulled your attention to him ,noticing his cute dirty blond hair,travelling down to his huge hair feet,letting out a gasp. "w-why are you feet so large?" you had whispered in shock. "I am hobbit ,of the shir-" " a what?" damn if this couldn't get any weird.

"Enough! WHo are you?why wre you trying to seduce our king?" A balding muscular tattooed man had interrupted ,your questioning."Your king? I havent heard of a king,not at least in europe for over a hundred years! Also last thing I remember was laying in my bed ,not in the arms of a 'king'"  you groaned out this sitution had began to give you to give you a headache.

"this is Thorin ,son Thrain ,son of Thror,the rightful dwarven king of erebor."

"Now enough of the bullshit ,Thor SOn of Odin ,God of thunder, I want to go home! THere are no such thing as dwarven king ,nor dwarves,nor whatever a hobbit  is ,and there's certainly no such place as erebor on this earth! This isn't bloody princess diaries."

The group of men had just stared at you in conflusion,as you had fainted ,therefore Gandalf had concluded that you will be apart of the company. As he had realised some how ,some way you had ended up in an another universe,well all he knew as some sorta force had brought you their world for a reason. He had forced Thorin to accept that you were to be apart of the company ,even if he felt absolute hatred towards you.

When you had came to the first thing you saw was Thorin,so you had made a run at him punching him square in the nose,only to get this sidekick,that tattoo'ed punk to grab a hold of you. "Oi what the fuckk ,get off me!"  yeah they basically tied you to a try ,and then from that Gandalf had explained everything ,and in a couple of hours you had agreed to join ,you still did not trust them however.

You had put upon an pony ,sat behind Bilbo ,the hobbit. "hey just so you know I am still not joining in on your orgies, I do not want to lose my innocence to anyone apart from a nice MHM-" you had pretended to cup an ass in your hands."set of cake shape ass,god dAMN."Bilbo had turned to look at you with a face of pure disgust ,,whereas others of the company such as the kings nephews had laughed. "and what is this orgy you speak of lassie?" the oldest dwarvf had spoken up you had found out his name was Balin older brother of Thorin's side piece.

"oh- its basically when a group of people do the stuff eachother all together" now bursts of laughter had filled your ears. "I assure you miss y/n l/n,the is none of that." Gandalf had spoken sternly ,he did not want to witness that no thank you.

"Oh good then, oh mister hobbit you have such beautiful locks." you had brought you had to touch a single curcle upon his head,whilst the hobbit had blushed brightly at your compliment. "oh well thank you ,as do you have lovely h/c locks." you had smiled widely ruffling his hair,Thorin heard this and did not like it,jerk.

Anways skip to a week later Thorin is brooding with his coak off,those pants really defined his ass,you were sat on a log next to Bilbo,you had nudged him gently grabbing his attention. His eyes filled with red from the warmth of the fires flames as he looked up at you,Thorin's nephews had seen your staring at your uncle and were watching and listening intensely.

"Thor has a nice nutt ,mhmm ,just like Jensen Ackles ass." Bilbo had choked on his own tongue ,as you just glaced back the dwarven kings ass one last time before turning back to Bilbo.

"aye, Y/n ,psttt" Kili had whispered shouted gaining you and Bilbo's attention ,he had gestured for you to go to him with his fingers,you had grabbed Bilbo by his hand before standing up,dragging him with you to sit beside the brothers. "wasssuppppp" damn this isn't the 2000s ,its bloody some age,you don't remember Gandalf got a bit boring if you were totally honest. Fili and Kili smirk to themselves, before Kili speaks up,Fili isn't as talkative as Kili is."you fancy our uncle." you had instantly scoffed , Bilbo had just pretend to be studying the stars ,and avoiding your bullshit lies.

"I see how it is,you trying to get your uncle laid, well yes he has the perfect ass, but I hardly know any of you,except Bilbo I accidentally saw him naked, he has a the cutest little bu-""Y/n!" you had cackled loudly catching some of the dwarves that were still awake attention, the nephews grinned even larger than before at you. "so you admit to looking at our uncles bottom,and you've seen Bilbo nude! Well!" he had basically shouted.

Bofur had turned around raised an eyebrow at you ,whilst Thorin pretended to be brooding still. "what?! Lass,you've seen the little fellow naked????" you had sighed loudly in distress,bloody god darn dwarves. "I say it again it was an accident!I was go for a pee, and then I daw that Bilbo had just gotten of a lake and was wearing a toel,so I decided to scare him, I didn't know he was going to scream ,and drop his towel." Bilbo held his head in in his hands in complete embarrassment.

"what did you except to happen lass? "

"I thought that scream was you."

"wow thanks for coming to save me then. plus i thought Bilbo might of just -you know what I dont know"

Thorin had felt a load off of his shoulders fall away ,knowing you didn't get it on with a dude that was half of your height, he didn't like the fact you were on this quest ,but he couldn't help thinking you had some nice hair. He also felt like grinning ,but of course a scowl was always imprinting on his face,he hadn't had a woman check him out in what it seemed as forever.

That was months of ago now, in which currently you had all been captured by elves ,well the prince of the Greenwood realm,Legolas.The company had been separated from you and Thorin and Bilbo was no where to be seen ,but you knew he was sneaky ass..butt. This elven king Thranduil , had did some voodoo to his face ,spat in Thorin's face with his stinky ass breathe...who needs to talk to someone that close up,might aswell had kissed him. After he was done with the dwarven king he started eyeing you up so you did back ,his ass mainly.

"and who are you ,andwhy does a woman travel with pigs?" his voice like silver ,yet cold as ice, but he would not stare bloody still,while you rated his ass. "Y/n L/n-god damnit stand still," the King had stopped , you had turned your body to get a look at his...flat ass,before leaning back to check out Thorin's. "what ARE you doing?" bro they didn't even tie your hands ,so you had made your way behind Thorin cupping his ass,making him gasp in shock ,as you squeezed gently,before heading back to Thranduil who shook his head no,you didn't want to be executed anyways.

"that king has a better ass than you, I suggust some squats, as your personality nor looks are in favour f-""ENOUGH. Tell me who are you?" he had interrupted you rudely , Thorin now less red ,smirking,he was glad he didn't end up in boner city.  "uh mister lanky stick ,I am y/n ,like I already told you,now can I and my mister patrick swayze be brought to our cells, I don't want to have sex with a skeleton..I mean a elven king."

"TAKE THEM TO THE CELLS,stay here an rot for all I care,100 years is a mere blink for an elf." you smirked at the king,as you and Thorin were grabbed by guards ,being pulled away. "I feel bad for your son,he inherited your flat ass, the poor kid don't get any attention from his daddy." If you were still infront of Thranduil he would've slapped you.  However instead you gpt see his son look to the ground ,away from his fathers gaze ,before walking out of the throne room shortly after you and Thorin.

Soon as you are shoved in separate cells,the questions start from the caged dwarves. "what happened up there?!" Kili questioned loudly,"I may have cupped a kings ass."

"You touched Thranduil's behind?"

"no I almost did,but damn You should have seen his face when I told him Thorin's was better than his and that I fet sorry for his son gainning a flat ass from his father."

Silence was in the air ,for a few seconds before the company had figured out what you had meant wwhen you said about touching a king's behind.

"you touched Uncle's butt infront of Thranduil?"

"oh hey ,Bilbo." thus Bilbo lead you all to the barrels ,in which you sat in on by yourself ,it was the ride of your life, and no kili doesn't get shot,because Dwalin held you you up while pulled down on the lever, therefore no one was injured. All that happened really was you were completely soaking ,and you stayed that way until you arrived at Bard's house,thank jesus you didn't have to go through the toliet.

Bard's daughters had handed you a blanket which you had wrapped around your shoulders ,in hope to warm up. However you could not help but see Thorin ,who refused a blanket politely. His beautiful long locks dripping ,his clothes sticking to his skin,darn he must be freezing ,dwarves and their stubborn asses. He really must be cold ,due to the scribe of this tale, experiences with wet long hair ,it takes ages to dry and keeps you freezing.

So you had decided without really thinking ,to walk towards Thorin who just stood waiting ,whilst everyone else was settling down,removing the blanket from your shoulders ,placing it upon his. Now you just stood next to him ,unsure what to do know ,blushing slightly feeling his eyes on you,gasp when he gets closer ,drapping the blanket back onto you ,but keeping it on his ,pulling you close by wrapping his arm around you ,as to keep you warm too.You had wrapped your arm around his waisr ,you could already feel him warming up against you ,you could smell him aswell ,and feel his hair against your neck.

However you did not look up to see the company's stares at their king,if anything they were worried about his behaviour,yet they wondered if it was true,was you his his one? But Thorin saw it ,yet no one dared to speak upon it , as he was their king ,yet his nephews ,oh they wanted to tease their uncle until the end of the one ring. They had smirked at their uncle,kili raising his eyebrows at Thorin ,who sent a deathly glare to his nephews.

He had broken the silence shortly after that,"where are the weapons?" and of course after that he was like they are shit ,okay lets go rob a bank ,thus the next time you were so close to Thorin was after your second boat ride in the last 36 hours.

Kili,Fili,OIn and Bofur were all left behind ,to catch up when Kili had recovered. THerefore the rest of you were all now to hike to Erebor ,god it was so tiring you felt as if your feet were on fire. You had groan in displeasure before muttering "I swear dwarves must have some hella leg muscle ,yet  I don't, I cant walk." Bilbo had scoffed next to you 'your legs are 10 times as long ,you got it easy'

"I hear humans ,cannot walk after 10 minutes with a dwarf,do you want to take a short break?" Thorin had a smirk inlaced with his voice ,as DWalin laughed loudly as if he was drax laughing at peter ,he was cocky when he wasn't trying to set an example for his nephews."no I want to be  carried Thor." you had spoken with annoyance ,not watching where you was going ,tripping falling harshly on the sharp rocks ,most deinitely cutting your knees open,you had let another groan. "god damn it korg." you had muttered yet again. Thorin had made it over to you ,pulling you to your feet , before turning away ,and kneeling infront of you.

"come on get on,we don't have time to delay" and with that Thorin oakenshield agve you a piggyback ride. "Thor son of Odin ,a God carrying me? No one would believe this."Thorin didn't understand who the fuck that was obviously,you had explained to him what a god was ,the same as the what they call malah ,or near the same.

Anyways he carried you all the way to Erebor ,with ease as well,he was indeed strong,and that was a long journey ,you even offered to walk but nope he would not take it. And after all the dragon stuff ,it was clear to you that he was suffering from dragon sickness ,he made everyone search for the arkenstone except you and Bilbo. You'll never guess what he requested you to do... Well he was on his throne and he was like "y/n ,come here" okay in which you did. "sit on my lap" nope and you walked away ,damn we he so forward now,you missed the shy Thorin.

It got worse and worse and soon enough Thranduil's army had arrived ,aswell as laketown ready to fight to claim what was theirs. Thorin was being a little bitch ,when practially he was a billionare,stopped sitting on bilbo , he isnt Dildo Gaggins ,not a huge stick up your butt.  Frankly you had enough.

"Thor ,if you dont snap out of it , I am going to show all these elves my breasts,you wouldn't allow a young woman to do such a think would you?" okay so blackmail is the only thing you could think of ,Thorin basically ignored you. "OI YOU FLAT ASS KING!" you  had gained the kings attention ,as Thranduil looked up at you ,as did Thorin as you began to lift your shirt up,revealing your belly button then high and high. UNtil two arms gripped your middle lifting you out of view. "No,I will not allow an elven king see my ones breasts,nor an one else" he had growled ,you had lifted your hands up in surrender ,well you tried.

He just told you he was your one and you was like ''okay bro,you do you. " ,well you didn't believe it ,you just thought it was the dragon sickness,you were the only female around ..  

Then of course he tried to throw Bilbo over, which that didn;t happen he escaped ,little rat,he is cute boy though, he did what was right. In which it got worse everyone fighting and such ,Thorin had went back to this throne ,so you had followed him with a better plan than before. As you got close to Thorin ,who watched your every move.

"I've been waiting for so long Now I've finally found someone to stand by me We saw the writing on the wall And we felt this magical fantasy Now with passion in our eyes There's no way we could disguise it secretly So we take each others hand 'Cause we seem to understand the urgency

Just remember You're the one thing I can't get enough of So I'll tell you something This could be love

Because I've had the time of my life No, I never felt this way before Yes I swear it's the truth And I owe it all to you."

you had spoke for Thorin to hear as you close with each step,yeah you just quoted song lyrics ,most famously know from dirty dancing ,but yeaah. THorin had stood up to meet you ,and once you had you had cupped his cheeks ,pressing a quick kiss to his lips,before cheekly pinching his butt making him gasp.

"Thorin it isn't right, we must help them ,please." as you said his actual name he knew he had to ,his bestfriend he had abandon trying to kill, maybe a little more than friend,could be dead.  He had sent you a smile before grabbbing your hand throwing his crown off. "wait you need a shirt like you gave bilbo ,I have feeling you will need it..thor son of odin."

And lucky you did say that and say hold on dude this sounds fishy ,why azog look like a shark off that will smith fish movie,fish tale? Oh its trap kili ,fili come here. THus you saved the Durins lives.

"hey if you are thor that makes your younger brother Loki ,wait he's dead sorry, uh your sister dis ,Loki and Fili and Kili Hela because her dad is LOki-not saying your sister is a man -well she looks like it-oh um sorry ,very handsome though."