#antons fight was about a min long

[bitchfendi]

sometimes i wish hershel rocked rufus’ shit i think that wouldve been nice to see

[mayapleiades]

Rewatching star trek (2009) with a somewhat critical eye now that I’m a little more into the star trek lore is… a wild ride

I know nothing of this will be news to anyone, but more or less in order, in a non-comprehensive list, we’ve got:

- me, crying at the first two notes of the opening scene. This is the movie that basically introduced me to star trek, so yes, I will be emotional and I won’t apologize

- That scene with the beastie boys still rocks. Driving along a country road with sabotage blasting from the speakers is still one of my dreams. Also, scene number 1 of Kirk almost falling off an edge

- I am now unable to watch Sarek interact with child!Spock without thinking about the ‘Sarek at the mall’ post.

- STILL THE BEST F– YOU SCENE IN THE HISTORY OF EVER. “LIVE LONG AND PROSPER AND FUCK YOU, BITCHES”

- Why is Uhura so beautiful. I mean how. I mean – yeah, you get it

- This bar brawl scene was absolutely unnecessary unless they just wanted to show us Kirk get punched. To be peak star trek they would’ve needed to slash his shirt.

- BONES GRUMPY LOVE OF MY LIFE

- Still hate that they made Kirk the resident lothario

- The Enterprise is always so beautiful. Thank you for not showing us a ~5-min long scene of its every detail though (TMP i’m looking at you)

- SULU AND CHEKOV YOU ABSOLUTE BEAUTIES - Anton you are missed so much

- Loved the scene of the jump to the surface of the drill. They made it clear that Kirk may well be a hot-headed mess but he’s not an idiot. Also, the red shirt dies. Point for peak star trek

- Why the hell did they not start evacuating Vulcan earlier?

- Also, back up a bit. Why the hell are communications offline, but Kirk and Sulu manage to communicate with the Enterprise during the jump?

- Nero waiting 25 years to get his revenge instead of, y’know, going back to Romulus, alert the people, save everyone - I call bullshit

- Scene number two of Kirk almost falling off a platform.

- This Vulcan Is Too Much Alderaan for me

- I don’t like Spock/Uhura I’m sorry

- The thing is. Nero asking Pike for the Starfleet codes for border protection grids around Earth implies that there should’ve been border protection grids around Vulcan. Shouldn’t have Starfleet known that those grids had been breached, before the Vulcan High Command managed to send out the distress call?

- Also, now that we’re on it - if communications go offline when the drill is activated, how the hell did the Vulcans manage to report seismic activity to Starfleet?

- Plot holes, plot holes everywhere

- Dropping Sherlock Holmes quotes because Spock is just That Bitch

- Why the hell would Spock maroon Kirk on a frozen hellish planet instead of, y’know, putting him in the brig is beyond me. Logical my ass

- Gigantic flower animal kills big bear-like animal and then decides to go for the tiny human toothpick. Good choice.

- LEONARD NIMOY I CRY

- SIMON PEGG YOU BEAUTIFUL RAY OF SUNSHINE I LOVE YOU

- Spock, you cheating bastard, I love you

- “Can I get a towel?” Cue poor Zachary barely holding it together

- FIST FIGHT FIST FIGHT FIST FIGHT (this is so far away from TOS!Spock and Kirk it’s unbelievable)

- “What is necessary is never unwise” I want to frame this quote at put this on my wall

- “oh good he’s seventeen” DEADPAN BONES YES MY FAVE

- Spock’s expression when Kirk slaps him on the shoulder. I die every time

- Token scene of Enterprise emerging from the clouds. Beautiful shot of Saturn by the way

- Kirk’s expressions while Spock and Uhura are snogging. I FEEL YOU BABY YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT

- From the number of pew-pews I heard I thought for a second we’d switched to Star Wars

- Why did they give Ambassador Spock so much red matter if only a drop is enough to destroy a fucking planet uh

- Aaaand Kirk is falling off a platform again

- Did they just open a gigantic black hole behind Saturn basically in Earth’s backyard ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE

- Me @ Kirk and Spock on the bridge, during the video chat with Nero: darlings you’ve just been through hell, how are you looking like two top models

- Kirk is trying to be logical for you Spock, he’s basically proposing, you should be marrying him

- “Scotty make this impossible thing happen!” “Captain, it’s impossible!” “Do it anyway!” - cue Scotty doing it anyway. They don’t appreciate you enough buddy

- “Father?” “I am not our father” I’m already crying please don’t

- God I love the Spock meeting Spock scene so much

- Pike, I bet your ass you’re relieved

- LOOK AT ALL THESE BEAUTIES STANDING ON THE BRIDGE, GO BABIES GO

- Into Darkness will be a much wilder ride, won’t it?

[kipakyousee]

7 Gaslighting Phrases Malignant Narcissists, Sociopaths and Psychopaths Use To Silence You, Translated

By Shahida Arabi, Bestselling Author

Last updated: 18 Nov 2019

~ 10 MIN READ

Gaslighting is an insidious erosion of your sense of reality; it creates a mental fog of epic proportions in the twisted “funhouse” of smoke, mirrors, and distortions that is an abusive relationship. When a malignant narcissist gaslights you, they engage in crazymaking discussions and character assassinations where they challenge and invalidate your thoughts, emotions, perceptions, and sanity. Gaslighting enables narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths to exhaust you to the point where you are unable to fight back. Rather than finding ways to healthily detach from this toxic person, you are sabotaged in your efforts to find a sense of certainty and validation in what you’ve experienced.

The term “gaslighting” originated in Patrick Hamilton’s 1938 play, Gas Light, where a manipulative husband drove his wife to insanity by causing her to question what she experienced. It was further popularized in the 1944 film adaptation, Gaslight, a psychological thriller about a man named Gregory Anton who murders a famous opera singer. He later marries her niece, Paula to convince her she is going crazy to the point of being institutionalized, with the agenda of stealing the rest of her family jewels. According to Dr. George Simon, victims of chronic gaslighting can suffer from a wide array of side effects, including flashbacks, heightened anxiety, intrusive thoughts, a low sense of self-worth, and mental confusion. In cases of severe manipulation and abuse, gaslighting can even lead to suicidal ideation, self-harm, and self-sabotage.

Gaslighting can take many forms – from questioning the status of your mental health to outright challenging your lived experiences. The most dangerous culprits of gaslighting? Malignant narcissists, who, by default, use gaslighting as a strategy to undermine the perception of their victims in order to evade accountability for their abuse. These perpetrators can use gaslighting callously and sadistically because they lack the remorse, empathy, or conscience to have any limits when they terrorize you or covertly provoke you. Gaslighting by a malignant narcissist is covert murder with clean hands, allowing the perpetrator to get away with their mistreatment while depicting the victims as the abusers.

I’ve spoken to thousands of survivors of malignant narcissists who have shared their stories of gaslighting, and below I include the most commonly used phrases malignant narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths employ to terrorize and deplete you, translated into what they really mean.

These phrases, when chronically used in the context of an abusive relationship, serve to demean, belittle and distort the reality of abuse victims.

1. You’re crazy/you have mental health issues/you need help.

Translation: You’re not the pathological one here. You’re just catching onto who I really am behind the mask and attempting to hold me accountable for my questionable behavior. I’d rather you question your own sanity so you believe that the problem is really you, rather than my own deceptiveness and manipulation. So long as you believe you’re the one who needs help, I’ll never have to take responsibility for changing my own disordered ways of thinking and behaving.

Malignant narcissists play the smirking doctors to their victims, treating them like unruly patients. Diagnosing their victims with mental health issues for having emotions is a way to pathologize their victims and undermine their credibility; this is even more effective when abusers are able to provoke reactions in their victims to convince society that they are the ones with mental health problems. According to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, some abusers will even actively drive their victims to the edge to concoct proof of their instability. The Hotline estimates that around 89% of their callers have experienced some form of mental health coercion and that 43% had experienced a substance abuse coercion from an abuser.

“Most survivors who reported their abusive partners had actively contributed to mental health difficulties or their use of substances also said their partners threatened to use the difficulties or substance use against them with important authorities, such as legal or child custody professionals, to prevent them from obtaining custody or other things that they wanted or needed.” – The National Center on Domestic Violence and the Domestic Violence Hotline

2. You’re just insecure and jealous.

Translation: I enjoy planting seeds of insecurity and doubt in your mind about your attractiveness, competence, and personality.  If you dare to question my numerous flirtations, affairs, and inappropriate interactions, I’ll be sure to put you back in your place in fear of losing me. The problem, as I’ll convince you, isn’t my deceptive behavior. It’s your inability to remain confident while I perpetually put you down, compare you in demeaning ways to others, and eventually cast you aside for the next best thing.

Manufacturing love triangles and harems are a narcissist’s forte. Robert Greene, author of The Art of Seduction, speaks about creating  “an aura of desirability” which stirs a frenzied sense of competition among potential suitors. In abuse survivor communities, this tactic is also known as triangulation. It grants malignant narcissists a depraved sense of power over their victims. They actively provoke jealousy in their intimate partners in order to control them and paint them as unhinged when they finally react. When a victim calls out a narcissist’s infidelity in any way, it is common for them to label the victims insecure, controlling, and jealous to avoid suspicion and to continue to reap the benefits of multiple sources of attention, praise, and ego strokes.

Remember: to someone who has something to hide, everything feels like an interrogation. Narcissists will often lash out in narcissistic rage, stonewalling, and excessive defensiveness when confronted with evidence of their betrayals.

3. You’re too sensitive/you’re overreacting.

Translation: It’s not that you’re too sensitive, but rather that I am insensitive, callous, and unempathic. I do not care about your emotions unless they serve me in some way. Your negative reactions provide me stimulation and pleasure, so please, do keep going. I enjoy putting you down for having legitimate reactions to my abuse.

According to Dr. Robin Stern, one of the effects of gaslighting include asking yourself “Am I too sensitive?” a dozen times a day. Claiming that victims are overreacting or oversensitive to emotional abuse is a popular way for malignant narcissists to override your certainty about the severity of the abuse you experienced.

Whether or not someone is a sensitive person is irrelevant when it comes to cases of psychological or physical violence. Abuse affects anyone and everyone of varying sensitivity levels, and its impact should not be taken lightly. A mark of a healthy partner is that they give you the space to feel your emotions and provide emotional validation, even if they do not agree with you. A malignant narcissist will excessively focus on your so-called sensitivity and consistently claim that you are overreacting rather than own their horrific actions when called out, regardless of how “sensitive�� you may be.

4. It was just a joke. You have no sense of humor.

Translation: I love disguising my abusive behavior as just jokes. I like calling you names, putting you down, and then claiming you’re the one who lacks the sense of humor to appreciate my depraved “wit.” Making you feel defective allows me to say and do whatever I wish, all with a smile and a derisive laugh.

Disguising cruel remarks, off-color comments, and put-downs as “just jokes” is a popular verbal abuse tactic, according to Patricia Evans, author of The Verbally Abusive Relationship. This malicious tactic is very different from playful teasing which takes a certain amount of rapport, trust, and mutual enjoyment. When malignant narcissists dole out these unsettling “jokes,” they can engage in acts of name-calling, taunting, belittling and contempt while evading the responsibility of issuing an apology or owning their vicious verbal assaults. You are then gaslighted into believing that it is your inability to appreciate the “humor” behind their cruelty, rather than the reality of its abusive intentions.

“Just jokes” are also used to test boundaries early on in an abusive relationship; what you may have rationalized as a tone-deaf or off-color comment in the beginning can escalate into psychological violence quite quickly in the hands of a narcissist. If you find that you have a partner who laughs at you more than they laugh with you, run. It will not get better.

5. You need to let it go. Why are you bringing this up?

Translation: I haven’t given you enough time to even process the last heinous incident of abuse, but you need to let it go already so I can move forward with exploiting you without facing any consequences for my behavior. Let me love-bomb you into thinking that things will be different this time around. Don’t bring up my past patterns of abusive behavior, because you’ll then recognize that this is a cycle that will just continue.

In any abuse cycle, it’s common for an abuser to engage in a hot-and-cold cycle where they periodically throw in crumbs of affection to keep you hooked and to renew hope for a return to the honeymoon phase. This is a manipulation tactic known as intermittent reinforcement, and it’s common for an abuser to terrorize you, only to return the next day and act like nothing has happened. When you do recall any abusive incidents, an abuser will tell you to “let it go” so they can sustain the cycle.

This form of abuse amnesia adds onto your addictive bond to the abuser, also known as “trauma bonding.” According to Dr. Logan (2018), “Trauma bonding is evidenced in any relationship which the connection defies logic and is very hard to break. The components necessary for a trauma bond to form are a power differential, intermittent good/bad treatment, and high arousal and bonding periods.”

6. You’re the problem here, not me.

Translation: I am the problem here, but I’ll be damned if I let you know it! I’d rather subject you to personal attacks as you bend over backwards trying to hit constantly moving goalposts and arbitrary expectations of the way I think you should feel and behave. As you spend most of your time trying to fix your fabricated flaws while always coming up short of what I deem “worthy,” I can just sit back, relax, and continue to mistreat you the way I feel entitled to. You won’t have any energy left to call me out.

It’s common for abusive partners to engage in malignant projection – to even go as far as to call their victims the narcissists and abusers, and to dump their own malignant qualities and behaviors onto their victims. This is a way for them to gaslight their victims into believing that they are the ones at fault and that their reactions to the abuse, rather than the abuse itself, is the problem. According to Narcissistic Personality clinical expert Dr. Martinez-Lewi, these projections tend to be psychologically abusive. As she writes, “The narcissist is never wrong. He {or she} automatically blames others when anything goes awry. It is very stressful to be the recipient of narcissistic projections. The sheer force of the narcissist’s accusations and recriminations is stunning and disorienting.”

7. I never said or did that. You’re imagining things.

Translation: Making you question what I did or said allows me to cast doubt on your perceptions and memories of the abuse you’ve experienced. If I make you think that you’re imagining things, you’ll start to wonder if you’re going crazy, rather than pinpointing the evidence which proves I am an abuser.

In the movie Gaslight, Gregory causes his new wife to believe that her aunt’s house is haunted so she can be institutionalized. He does everything from rearranging items in the house, flickering gas lights on to making noises in the attic so she is no longer able to discern whether or not what she’s seeing is real.  He isolates her so that she is unable to gain validation.  After manufacturing these crazymaking scenarios, he then convinces her that these events are all a figment of her imagination.

Many victims of chronic gaslighting struggle with the cognitive dissonance which occurs when their abuser tells them that they never did or said something. Much like reasonable doubt can sway a jury, even the hint that something may not have happened after all can be powerful enough to override someone’s perceptions. Researchers Hasher, Goldstein and Toppino (1997) call this the “illusory truth effect” – they discovered that when falsehoods are repeated, they are more likely to be internalized as true simply due to the effects of repetition.  That is why continual denial and minimization can be so effective in convincing victims of gaslighting that they are indeed imagining things or suffering from memory loss, rather than standing firm in their beliefs and experiences.

The Big Picture

In order to resist the effects of gaslighting, you must get in touch with your own reality and prevent yourself from getting entrapped into an endless loop of self-doubt. Learn to identify the red flags of malignant narcissists and their manipulation tactics so you can get out of disorienting, crazymaking conversations with malignant narcissists before they escalate into wild accusations, projections, blameshifting and put-downs which will only exacerbate your sense of confusion. Develop a sense of self-validation and self-trust so you can get in touch with how you really feel about the way someone is treating you, rather than getting stuck attempting to explain yourself to a manipulator with an agenda.

Getting space from your abuser is essential. Be sure to document events as they happened, rather than how your abuser tells you they happened. Save text messages, voicemails, e-mails, audio or video recordings (if permitted in your state laws) which can help you to remember the facts in times of mental fog, rather than subscribing to the distortions and delusions of the abuser.

Engage in extreme self-care by participating in mind-body healing modalities which target the physical as well as psychological symptoms of the abuse. Recovery is important to achieve mental clarity. Enlist the help of a third party, such as a trauma-informed therapist, and go through the incidents of abuse together to anchor yourself back to what you’ve experienced. Malignant narcissists might attempt to rewrite your reality, but you don’t have to accept their twisted narratives as truth.

References

Evans, P. (2010). The verbally abusive relationship: How to recognize it and how to respond. Avon, MA: Adams Media.

Greene, R. (2004). The art of seduction. Gardners Books.

Hasher, L., Goldstein, D., & Toppino, T. (1977). Frequency and the conference of referential validity. Journal of Verbal Learning and Verbal Behavior, 16(1), 107-112. doi:10.1016/s0022-5371(77)80012-1

Martinez-Lewi, L. (2012, November 10). Narcissist’s Projections are Psychologically Abusive. Retrieved March 19, 2019, from http://thenarcissistinyourlife.com/narcissists-projections-are-psychologically-abusive/

Logan, M. H. (2018). Stockholm Syndrome: Held Hostage by the One You Love. Violence and Gender,5(2), 67-69. doi:10.1089/vio.2017.0076

Simon, G. (2018, May 11). Overcoming Gaslighting Effects. Retrieved March 19, 2019, from https://www.drgeorgesimon.com/overcoming-gaslighting-effects/

Stern, R., & Wolf, N. (2018). The gaslight effect: How to spot and survive the hidden manipulation others use to control your life. New York: Harmony Books.

Warshaw, C., Lyon, E., Bland, P. J., Phillips, H., & Hooper, M. (2014). Mental Health and Substance Use Coercion Surveys. Report from the National Center on Domestic Violence, Trauma & Mental Health and the National Domestic Violence Hotline. National Center on Domestic Violence, Trauma and Mental Health. Retrieved here. November 5, 2017

[enevoldsenmccormick68-blog]

Nautilus Circuit Training.

It's necessary to keep fitness tools and health club floor disinfect at health club or fitness centers. Focused solar power (CSP) innovation, as it is understood, is seen by several as a less complex, more affordable and also a lot more reliable means to harness the sunlight's. power than various other methods such as photovoltaic (PV) panels. Rito and also Goldar infiltrated the Command Center as well as took the Crystal, just before the explosive tool they had actually planted previously went off, leaving the Command Center in damages, as well as the Rangers without a headquarters. We're going to truly drive via our heels as well as we're gon na lift our hips as high as we can. Action on environment is long-overdue, as well as the Clean Power Plan is a vital step to suppress the carbon contamination that drives hazardous climate adjustment and also threatens our youngsters, our neighborhoods, and our planet. 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Both entail modifications to the Emissions Power Criterion, which sets a restriction on new coal nuclear power plant' annual carbon emissions based on their capability, and which the UK's aging fleet would be not able to meet. The Lift is most definitely worth taking into consideration if slumping over is something essentially bringing you down.

[365footballorg-blog]

New York City FC remain undaunted by obstacles to stay unbeaten this season

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April 1, 201812:05AM EDT

SAN JOSE, Calif. – Even the last-minute disappearance of David Villa from the starting lineup isn’t enough to derail New York City FC right now.

With their superstar captain sidelined by an unspecified problem that cropped up during pre-match warmups, NYCFC nevertheless rebounded from a one-goal deficit at halftime to turn in a second consecutive road comeback – this time a 2-1 victory against the San Jose Earthquakes at Avaya Stadium on Saturday.

NYCFC (4-0-1) remained unbeaten in 2018 behind second-half goals from Anton Tinnerholm and – albeit with a helpful deflection – Maximiliano Morález. San Jose (1-2-0) have taken just one point out of 12 since NYCFC joined MLS in 2015.

“I always believe good teams don’t just play well. They fight when it’s time to fight,” NYCFC coach Patrick Vieira said. “And I think when we got to the last 15, 20 minutes, it was really difficult and we put our sleeves up and we fought for each other. This is the character that we need to show.”

The visitors actually bossed the game for long stretches after San Jose center back Yeferson Quintana glanced home a too-easy header from a third-minute corner kick. Jo Inge Berget, dropped into the starting lineup to replace Villa, provided an outlet as NYCFC controlled 68.2 percent of possession in the first half.

“I think this is a lot of credit to the players because that wasn’t our plan in the beginning of the week,” Vieira said. “Ben [Sweat, NYCFC’s usual left back] traveled with us but wasn’t feeling well, he has the flu, so we made the decision not to play him this morning. David was feeling good and after the warmup, he was feeling something that couldn’t allow him to be on the field. And I think the players who wasn’t supposed to start the game, I think they prepared well mentally and I think it’s all a credit to them.”

NYCFC quickly found an equalizer through Tinnerholm’s thunderous corner-kick volley off the crossbar in the 49th minute, his second goal in three MLS appearances since coming over from Swedish side Malmo FF in December. It was a right-footed bookend to the left-footed screamer he fired home in his last match, March 11 against the LA Galaxy.

“You guys have to believe that I’m a monster, but I haven’t scored any goals like this in 25 years,” said Tinnerholm, who name-checked a certain countryman. “It’s a new tradition started. I was inspired by Zlatan earlier today. … Now I’ve scored one banger with the right, one with the left. Patrick can stop talking about [how] I have two left feet.”

Morález finished off the comeback by snapping home a shot off a pullback from Ismael Tajouri-Shradi in the 60th minute.

“I think we were really calm, we were composed and at the end, we got the result that we wanted,” Vieira said.

Now NYCFC can enjoy some much-needed rest before hosting Real Salt Lake on April 11. By then, they can hopefully shine more light publicly on what felled Villa.

“It’s too early to talk about it,” Vieira said. “I think we need a little bit more time to go back to New York and do more exams before getting any kind of conclusion. … Wait a couple of days.”

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MLSsoccer.com News

New York City FC remain undaunted by obstacles to stay unbeaten this season was originally published on 365 Football

[365footballorg-blog]

Efficient NYCFC, unlucky Orlando experience contrasting fortunes in 2018

Vincent Carchietta-USA Today Sports Images

March 17, 20189:51PM EDT

NEW YORK — Jason Kreis has coached both teams, and they both entered Major League Soccer at the same time.

But the similarities between New York City FC and Orlando City SC in 2018 end there.

Both teams were without first-choice players for their meeting on Saturday: Orlando without forwards Dom Dwyer and Stefano Pinho and midfielder Oriol Rosell to injury and PC to suspension, and NYCFC missed starters David Villa and Anton Tinnerholm, who failed late fitness tests.

But it was NYCFC who showed their depth, took their chances and came away with a 2-0 win at Yankee Stadium.

It didn’t start out that way, though, for the home side. They had 63.3 percent of possession, but created few scoring chances and the 0-0 scoreline at the half suited the visitors.

However, NYCFC coach Patrick Vieira lauded his team’s maturity after halftime to not get frustrated and continue to seek the goal. It came on the first of two defensive blunders by Orlando City in their defensive third.

“It was really difficult, and it was difficult for us to find the space to play and to express ourselves,” Vieira said. “That’s why this game makes me more happy than the other two games we played so far, because this one we keep our organization, our discipline on the field and we waited for the right time. When they make their mistake, we take our chances.”

NYCFC are off to the first 3-0-0 start in the club’s brief history, while Orlando, now 0-2-1, are being harshly punished for mistakes.

“Unfortunately for me, I think that’s three matches where I just feel like we’re giving things away,” Kreis said. “In the first match [vs. D.C. United], we give away a goal off defending a throw-in in our own end and we end up with an ejection that was a poor decision. The second game [vs. Minnesota], it was the same thing with giving away a cheap goal, and this game we smash the ball at our goalkeeper and give away the first goal.”

Another positive, and difference, for NYCFC from last year is the solidity of their defense. It was a point of emphasis in the offseason for Vieira and the club has now conceded just once in three games. Orlando’s best chances came when Justin Meram rolled a low drive wide of the far post and Will Johnson lashed a shot off the crossbar.

“The reaction from when a ball turns over, or the reaction when a guy is out of position, it’s all about fighting for the next man and having each other’s backs,” NYCFC goalkeeper Sean Johnson said. “That’s what has really propelled us to a really fantastic defensive start and getting three wins in three games.”

The biggest difference between the 2015 expansion brethren, although it’s just three games into the season, is in the standings. NYCFC sit atop the Eastern Conference with maximum points from their three games, while Orlando City are last with just one point in their three games.

There are still 31 more matches to play over the course of seven months, but the Lions are already feeling the heat.

“We have pressure on ourselves already, we had pressure since Day 1,” midfielder Sacha Kljestan said after making his OCSC debut. “I think all the guys on our team know that we built this team to be a ‘win now’ type of team this season and we can’t wait too long to get things kick-started before we put ourselves in too deep of a hole. The pressure is on and we know it.”

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Efficient NYCFC, unlucky Orlando experience contrasting fortunes in 2018 was originally published on 365 Football