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morepeachyogurt · 4 years ago

Text

i’m locking up everyone (who ever laid a finger on me)

Elle Greenaway Gen fic, brief romance with ofc

Word Count- 8,100

Summary- Elle’s been angry since she was young, a look into that anger until she finally gives in.

Tw- blood, knives, murder, brief mentions of rape and pedophilia (nothing graphic), minor substance mentioned, and language I guess

read here on ao3

You think it all started when Randall Garner decided you weren’t worth living. When he took a bullet from his shiny gun, broke into your home, your safe place, and shot you in the chest. As your blood spilled onto your floors you couldn’t help but blame the man who sent you home. Hotch may not have pulled the trigger but he loaded the gun which almost took your life. You were helpless, had to sit there, and watch it pour onto your floor like a pond being drained to make room for yet another building. Its life is sucked out of it like yours was. You closed your eyes because you did not want to see the blood. You’re no stranger to blood, you’re a woman after all, plus you work a job surrounded by murder and misery. There's nothing quite like watching corpse after corpse of other women laying on the floor, their eyes panicked and their blood staining the floor. It was never supposed to be you but now it was. This is how it ends, you suppose. You didn’t even save a life going down like you always thought you would. You were targeted. A victim. You were not an accident caught in the crosshairs. No, this was intentional and now you’re bleeding out your soul and you almost don’t want to be brought back to life.

When you were seven your mother baked pie after pie. Your father was dead, died heroically everyone said. Like that made it better. Who cares that you’ll never see him again, he’ll never teach you to ride a bike now like you guilt-tripped him for not doing before. Now he's dead and you’re surrounded by baked goods to fuel the appetite you don’t have. You feel hollow and you wish you didn’t. Sadness like your mother would be better, anger like his fellow officers would be better. You ask her why she’s baking pies, she doesn’t even like them. Fueron la cosa favorita de tu papá, cariño. Lo echo de menos cada dia. She acts like you don’t know your father’s favorite dessert, like you don’t miss him too. Ah, there’s the anger. Much better, you’ll revel in. That was not your question, you wanted to know why she felt like she could replace him with apple pie. You don’t tell her this, your father didn’t call you peanut to be vicious, he called you it because you were kind and soft. Were. Instead, you give your mother a soft smile like that fixes anything.

The days go on like they always do, a tv show where you cannot cancel your subscription. The anger subsides a bit, there will always be a gaping hole where your father’s kind eyes and gentle smile took root. For now, your heart is creating a shelter for it. It’s not perfect yet but you hope someday it will be.

You learn to laugh again, you speak Spanish with your mother. Sea bilingual mija, los estudios dicen que es buena para tu cerebro. ¿No quises saber la lengua materna de sus ancestros? You let her teach you the words of the women who can before you. It’s a beautiful thing to speak two languages. Perhaps connections make us who we are, now your ability to connect is twofold.

Your first day at the bau was almost as you imagined it. You did not imagine the genius barely old enough to drink, looking at crime scenes like he was made for it. Sculpted by the gods to examine the bodies of women like you and say why they were executed and by whom. Perhaps he was, Gideon did seem to think of himself as a god figure. You did not expect when returning to the office to see a woman who looked as though she stepped inside a rainbow and absorbed all its warmth. She looked like she would give you great hugs, she looked like home. That was a dangerous thought to be had in a place like this. They say it's a family. No family should be hoisted upon the foundation of murder. Blood should not be the glue that holds people together. Oh, and blood there was, almost every crime scene had its stench. The rust in the air reminds you of the junkyard by your house where you used to get high at with your friend that was never quite a friend. You would talk about the secrets of the universe and whether or not you felt as though you could exist in this world without paying a price. You argued that the world seems to take reservations, some were born with them already made, others bought them. The rest of you were forced to sell your soul to the devil to earn enough money to survive, to have a place in the world. She never quite saw your point. She will.

Even in your youth, you’ve never truly felt safe, perks of having a cop as a father means you’ve learned the cruelty of man far sooner than you should have, than you would have. He gave you rules to keep you safe.

Rule 1: you cannot walk alone or late at night. You yearn for the freedom of the boys on your block. The night and its darkness is so pure to you, the stars always in sight. Your mother tells you your father is in the sky and you look for him, to see if he twinkles at you. You do not want your mother to know this, it’s a secret shared by the two of you and you think that's sacred. Since you can’t walk alone at night you never get to look for him. Your father and freedom robbed from you by the men on the news and in your father’s case files.

Rule 2: never leave your drink unattended, you do not drink you are much too young but sometimes your eyes wander to your liquor cabinet and you wonder if there is a better state of being. If you can float above the longing for a different reality where you have a father and you are happy.

Rule 3: Do not dress provocatively, you are fourteen years old and you do not see why what you wear should impact your safety. You are not a gift wrapped up in a pretty package waiting for it to be ripped away to reveal something desirable. That does not stop the men from leering at you when you walk home from school, you still have your backpack on so you know it’s part of the appeal. It does not stop the boy in your science class from trying to grab your ass after class. You punch him in the nose and you get suspended. They do not listen to you. They do not care about the words of a girl, you are not here to have opinions on the world apparently you’re here to be a toy for those meant to have opinions. One day you’ll show them they’re wrong.

The list goes on and on, society loves to tell you that you will never be safe in this world. You wonder why no one is trying to make the world safe for you. Maybe that's your purpose. You were too late to be saved from the cruelty of this universe but perhaps there's another young girl who can be.

College, the supposed best years of your life. You decided to fulfill fourteen-year-old you’s wish to save the girls of the world so you major in criminology with a minor in psychology. What better way to stop them than to get inside their heads. You won’t let them into yours. They do not deserve the honor and the horror. You watch crime shows for fun, maybe for education. You see how these girls get taken and you know how to not make their mistakes. You also see what the killers did wrong. Part of you wonders if your future job, and the education for said job, are all an elaborate plan for you to win at the world. Life’s a game and you plan to be its victor. Learn their mistakes. Be better. You won’t fall for their tricks, you’re smarter than that.

Your studies do not stop you from enjoying your time here while you can. Once you see your first real corpse you know there's no going back. Any bit of being insouciant will be stolen from you just like the lives of the bodies you will hover over.

The party you are at is loud, not as loud as the inside your head, but enough to help you get out of it. You lock eyes with a woman who is quite possibly a work of art. She's in one of your classes, the buzz of alcohol in your head pleasantly blocking all memories of your studies. She smiles at you, shyly, and you wonder for the first time if perhaps angels are real. Her hair is blonde, just like an angel, it is her halo. Her eyes are blue like the water of the lakes you have stared at looking for an answer and perhaps you can find it in her eyes. She makes her way to you, she too has been loosened by alcohol for she stands far too close to be mistaken with platonic intentions towards you. Lily, your brain provides, is even more beautiful up close. She has freckles that dance along the bridge of her nose and you briefly wish to kiss them. Kiss her. The two of you dance, swaying to the beat of whatever trashy music is playing. You ask her if she’d like to go outside and take a walk with you. She says yes.

She is curious why but she follows you outside. You hesitantly grasp her hand as you pull her along a secret path you found on your first week here. She looks at the constellations above you and names the one you are staring at. As she looks at the sky you decide she is more beautiful than they are and you gaze at her while she gazes at the stars. She catches you eventually and you place a hand on her cheek. Her eyes shimmer in the moonlight and you ask if you can kiss her. She accepts and you accept that it might be your new favorite hobby. Perhaps you could spend hours kissing her. You do.

Lily and you have your perfect YA book experience. She takes you to coffee shops and you look at the stars together. You are not breaking your father’s rules for now you are not alone, it will end though, you know it. You are not the type of girl who gets her happy ending. You tell her a bad pun about the stars and she laughs and tells you the names of constellations she knows, god her laugh. You wish you could bottle it up and save it for a rainy day. Granted, you spend your rainy days with her cuddling up with bad movies and good hot chocolate. You gift her a pair of constellation earrings, you tell her, think of me when you look at the night sky, you want to say, please don’t forget me when you leave me, she gives you a blanket which is almost as soft as her. You are so in love with her your words can not describe it, so you use other people's words. You write poetry on the soft skin of her forearm. She doodles little flowers on your wrist. Perhaps they are like matching tattoos, unlike matching tattoos, these do not last forever. Just like the two of you. The problem comes not with her, she was never anything but perfect to you. The problem of course is you.

As you drown in your textbooks filled with bodies and bodies and bodies you can feel your soul filling with misery and a passion for justice. Slowly it consumes you and there is little time for the joy that is brought to you by her. She feels you slipping away like a boat that is not properly tied. It’s hard to be in a relationship where the other person is half focused on you while the other half of her mind wanders in dark alleyways with killers, wanting, no needing, to know why they commit their sins. Study dates turn into texts turn into nothing. There is no formal break up. You do not deserve the courtesy of a clean break and she is too sweet to break your heart. The two of you drift apart like you always knew you would, and soon you only see her in your one shared class. Her mind is not consumed with darkness, Lily does not wish to catch the monsters of the world, she wishes to paint them. Sometimes you look into her studio while she paints and you watch her hands and marvel. You never know if she’s aware you do this, but if she is, she spares you the shame of being so pathetic you need to watch someone you love paint from the shadows because you were too much of a coward to commit yourself to her and you allowed yourself to slip away into the darkness of your mind.

You think everyone got it wrong, it is so easy to be fueled by hate and spite. Look around you, the world is a cruel place. To not be affected by it is a power that you almost envy. To see the bad in the world and choose to be good is something you never had and will never have. It is not in your cards so you decided to make the best of it. You miss her kind eyes and gentle laugh every day of your life, but you know it is better to live in the darkness than let your black ink slowly turn her away from the light where she belongs.

The day you turn 18 you buy a handgun. You used to carry it around your ankle, liking the weight of your footsteps hitting the ground. One day the ground will break under your heel. Now, as an agent, your handgun sits on your left hip. You want people to fear you, you want them to know you are dangerous. And yet, you still don’t feel safe in this cruel world. So you buy a knife. It glimmers in the light, its handle is intricately carved out of wood. You have a holder for it on your thigh for the days where you wear dresses, on days where you aim to please. On days you don’t give a fuck about anyone else, when you wear what you wish, your knife sits either in your pocket, if you are blessed with pockets, your shoe, if it fits, or the holder you bought which holds your knife nice and close to you, flesh with your back. You like the power you hold with your weapons. You learn your craft better than most. You learn accuracy, precision, strength. Throwing knives feels even better than it looks, you know you hold in both your hands the ability to take life from someone who is not worthy of it.

When you were in fifth grade, boys decided to see how fun it would be to push your buttons. You were smarter than them, faster than them. They didn't like losing to a girl, why is being a girl shameful, you asked your teacher this once. She did not answer you, you suspect she does not know. If you were the first to answer a question, and you often were, they would tease you. Try hard, was their favorite. Well maybe, if they wanted to beat you they should try harder. You told a boy this once and he grabbed your arm and called you a bitch. Your mom did not let you start taking martial arts classes.

If they did not like your words, perhaps they would respond to physical intimidation. You preferred kicking shins, it did not result in blood and there was lots of sweet, sweet, plausible deniability. Not that they ever tried to get you in trouble, the biggest thing in the world is a man’s ego. You became meaner, colder. Your mother asks you where her sweet girl went, she does not want to hear that perhaps she never existed. No one can hurt you if you never let them in. If you carry yourself with a scowl and your words bite those who try you and you hurt those who try to hurt you. They can't, you won't let them. You are not weak like they are, you are strong. It never quite works though, the boys in your class see a challenge. Something they can beat. They challenge you loudly, in front of everything and everyone. You can no longer afford to make a mistake. If you do, they yell we beat Elle, haha we did it. The teachers watch as they attack you. Most do not care. The kind girls in your class do not experience this and maybe, just maybe, you should go back to being like them. It makes you feel vulnerable though, to be kind without question. No, they have to earn your kindness, earn your respect. Giving it out for free did not win you anything. You take the name bitch and wear it like a badge of honor.

Eventually, you fall for the propaganda of your team being a family. As an only child, you’ve sometimes wished for siblings, maybe you’ve found them. Reid is like your little brother, annoying at times, but sweet and endearing. You would cause destruction if anything happened to him. He deserves it. JJ is hard to describe as a part of your family, she reminds you of Lily with her bright eyes and kind smile. She is not Lily but you wonder if she would ever consider being with you. She is a part of this world of darkness, you might not soil her. Oh, but you would, it is selfish of you to think that you could be loved and not ruin them. Your touch is like a virus, it kills if given the chance. You will not give it another shot.

Garcia is your sister, she is concerned about you when you risk your life in the field time, and time again, you can’t help but think she chose the wrong job. You love her, almost, and not quite. She is always sweet to you, her personality is a breath of fresh air in this world. It needs more of her and that's why you want to be close to her but can’t. Morgan is your older brother, he roughhouses with you, he won't admit it but you are just as good as him. You knew you would be, the world underestimates you, and as annoying as it is, it is your advantage. He understands you, you think he is not the only one who is afraid of loving others, of course, neither of you says anything but you never needed to. Gideon and Hotch would be your fathers but they are nothing like your father. Your father was kind and he taught you things, he gave you praise. Hotch and Gideon are cold to you, Gideon more than Hotch. They are both fathers but you feel sorrow for their children. It must hurt to know they will always be second in importance to killers, that they are not enough to be home every night for. You resent them both for hurting their children.

Fresh out of college means it’s time for a career. You decide to join the FBI, the police were not enough to save your father, they are almost useless, you need to be powerful. You join the highest law enforcement in the country and you excel. Sex crimes is not a fun job, but you take pleasure in taking down men who decided to pray on women and children. They do not deserve the nice jail cells they get, but you hope they do get what's coming for them in prison. Of course, that banks on them getting jail time at all. Rape is the only crime where people can suggest that the victim enjoyed it. It is the only subjective crime. There is no enjoyable murder or robbery, victims do not ask to have their identity stolen. It fills you with more rage than you knew was available. You are close with your colleges but you are not their friends. They think you are though. You drink with them, you play games with them, you joke with them. You do not care very much about them. It is a weakness to rely on others for joy, it is foolish to attach yourself to people who are here to hold up a broken system. You also hold up that system, for now at least. You promise yourself you will never be close to your teammates. Justice has no room for friendship.

Gideon keeps a book of people who he has saved. You keep a book of vile men who’ve charmed the justice system, not you though, you are justice but you are not a system. Perhaps you are vengeance.

Your mother taught you to cook when you were little, Cuban food to keep your father alive in memory. As if he would smell the spices and resurrect from the dead. You continue to cook though, it's a hobby and a good one. It provides for you. Unlike Reid, Chinese take out is not your main food source.

Never cut peppers while thinking about murder. A rule no one taught you but they most definitely should have. Your mind is full of your latest case. A pedophile who would cut the hair off his victims to make a doll of them. He wanted to keep them forever, forever young too. You cut your finger instead of the pepper. The pain does not bother you, you are far too used to it for it to impact you, in fact, if anything it makes you feel alive. There is blood dripping down your finger and you are memorized. It’s different from the blood when you were shot, this is carefully controlled. The contrast of it against your skin is divine. You’ve always thought blood was messy, the villain that comes once a month, and an inconvenience when you cut yourself shaving. You never thought it was elegant until now. You don’t want to continue to cut yourself, that was never your brand. But now, maybe after being inside the minds of men who hurt others, you wish to see their blood run down your hands.

You clean and wash your finger, you’ll catalog and examine those thoughts for another day. You are not evil, not like that. At least you hope not. Although, what would it matter if there was one more person committing sins out there. God has lost control already, he will not control you, society will not control you. You are in control, more than you’ve ever been.

At night you lie awake and think about what you could do to cement your newfound control. You think about the men who’ve gotten away with their heinous acts. You think that perhaps, it would feel good to kill them. For them to suffer like they made others suffer. Prison was not for them, the judges made sure of that. They say liberty and justice for all. These men have liberty but they have not found justice. You will help them find it.

Not only did Randall Garner break into your house and shoot you. He had the audacity to stick his filthy finger in your bullet wound and write on the walls of your home. He wrote ‘rules’, how ironic. You’ve lived by the rules your father gave you even before he was buried in the earth. Now, you’re being punished for not following the rules of a killer. Your father’s rules were not enough to save you. It’s time you break them and make your own.

Rule 1: Do not take shit from anyone, especially a man. If they are cruel to you, be crueler to them. This, however, does not mean to be rude to everyone. Simply, just like in middle school, people must earn your respect. Children, however, are exempt. They have not been tainted by the universe yet, they are unmarked and kind. If they are not kind, something made them that way and they deserve your kindness more than anyone else.

Rule 2: Be smarter and be faster than everyone else. They will not catch you, they may know it's you, it's inevitable, but you will be as free as the men you will hunt.

Rule 3: Friends are for fools, you do not need them. They will slow you down and they will try to convince you that you are wrong, that you need fixing. You can almost hear Reid telling you that you need help, that you're sick. You are not a coward, and you do not need fixing.

High school was not the best time of your life, but it certainly wasn't the worst. You had a tight circle of friends, you didn't quite share with each other, at least your secrets. But you cared enough about each other that it was not important that they didn't know about you. Your friends didn't need to know about your pining over the girl in your math class, that helped you out if you ever needed it and was as sharp as her jawline. You weren’t lonely and that was enough for you, you were, dare you say it, happy. You cooked for your friends on occasions, typically birthdays. You got invited to parties and learned to love the loud music and the smell of beer. You were top of your class, much to some people’s chagrin, but they couldn’t shake you. You joined debate so you could argue for a sport, and boy were you good at it. Teachers said they never met anyone as passionate as you, you didn't tell them that you carry resentment for the shallow topics they choose. There's airing on the side of apolitical and there's apathy towards others. They didn’t like you discussing your opinions, that did not stop you one bit.

Your friend that was always a bit more plays with your hair and you think that maybe the world is kind and gentle, maybe she's right. You feel safe in her lap, her hand carding through your hair before she starts to braid it. It’s intimate in a way that makes you want to sob, no one has touched you like they aren’t afraid of you or aren’t afraid of you breaking in a very long time. You look too much like your father for your mother, and you feel disconnected from her. The two of you do not embrace.

The ceiling above you is popcorn and if you stare long enough you imagine it’s the stars, a beautiful constellation. The world always feels so small with just the two of you. You don’t like being reminded that it is you that is small, not the world. The world is large and it is terrifying, a disheartening juxtaposition.

After someone decides that maybe you shouldn't die you are rushed to the hospital. Granted, you're the one the dialed 911, you always did have to save yourself. You don’t remember much, you are so tired and you’ve lost so much blood. The medics say that they are losing you, perhaps you were never here to begin with. They administer cpr to you and you feel like your body is being crushed. It feels like they are going to kill you as they try to save your life. The next time you open your eyes you're back on the jet. You feel like you're dreaming, and then you know it can’t be real because your father is here. Your father is dead so you think that you must be too. What a cruel trick it must be to have your afterlife still consumed by your job, you are on a jet but you can not fly it. Dad calls you peanut and you almost lose it right there. The shelter you built for your heart after his loss feels like it's been shattered. You feel raw, exposed. Somehow, in his presence, you do not mind it quite so much. You’ve missed him more than you remember and you almost hope that this is real. What this is, you aren’t sure. He tells you it’s a midway point, that you have to choose whether or not you want to live. And that you must make it now.

On the one hand, living always has been a chore. It’s peaceful here with your father. The two of you can talk about everything you’ve always wanted to talk about. You’d like to hear his thoughts on philosophy. He always was your hero.

On the other hand, who will water your plants? You haven’t gotten to say goodbye to the bau and you haven't gotten your justice yet.

You choose to live.

When you moved into your apartment, the first thing you did after unboxing everything was to buy a plant. Your apartment looked dead, just because you were here to make your living in death and you’ve never quite felt alive, did not mean your apartment was doomed to suffer the same fate. You started small with a succulent, they were supposed to be easy to take care of. Slowly your collection grew, you were growing flowers and herbs as well. Your house has never felt more like a home than when all your plants are blooming. It gives you a purpose, something to come home for. You’d also like a cat but you know you are never home enough to sustain all its needs. Hotch has a son at home that he never sees but you suppose that he’s not as important to him as your cat would be to you. You try your hand at painting on your wall, like maybe you learned something from all the time you stared at Lily. You wonder if she still thinks of you, if she looks at the stars and remembers you. You still have the blanket she gave you. It adorns your couch and you think it might be your most prized possession.

You consider getting a tattoo of poetry or a quote in her honor, you feel somedays like you might be obsessed with her but you also might just be in love with her still. You’ve found that there's a fine line between love, obsession, and insanity. Where you fall on the scale you aren’t sure yet and you know you don’t want to find out. You think the two of you were like the quote; ‘A sky full of stars and he was staring at her’. That first night where you walked together was exactly that. She was more beautiful than the night sky and you love the night sky. Maybe someday you’ll get that tattoo but for now, you have crimes to solve and your heart to bury.

You’ve always known that other Latina women were of the more likely to be victims of sexual crimes. That didn't stop you from being shocked and having your heart break every time you saw another woman like you report a heinous crime done to her. You’ve never appreciated your mother deciding you needed to speak Spanish more than when you’ve been able to communicate in these women’s native language. Something about language makes people feel safe, at home. You think perhaps, communication is the world's greatest tool.

You cut your hair like you think it will solve your problems. Like you don’t feel like murder is an option now, like you don’t resent your team for getting you shot. Like you don’t feel like every man is out to get you. At least more than they were before. For a team of gifted profilers, no one seems to notice that you are breaking. Or maybe they do and they simply don’t care that you lie awake at night wondering if your choice to live was a good one or how your blood looked on your knife that day where you accidentally cut yourself. Or maybe, you’ve gotten so used to hiding yourself that they simply think you are still the same person you were before a bullet pierced your skin. Before a man targeted you for not following his rules. Because he needed to be in control. Now he’s dead and it's your turn to be in control. They won’t notice it at first. But you will start controlling them ever so slightly. And then, then you will strike. First, you will make them think you have PTSD, after all, you’d be a prime victim to it. They will be lenient because they think you dream about your attack and not how nice it would feel to slice through the skin of a monster. They don’t know you, you've made sure of that. You’ll open up to Reid if by open you mean fake everything. You’ll tell him about the dreams you aren’t having, and that you definitely see his face everywhere you go. How your walls still feel like they are covered in your blood. Of course, that would be suspicious so first, you will be short. You will be passive-aggressive, more than normal, you will make him see that you are wrong. He will be compelled to help you, ask you what is wrong. He’s too kind to you and this world, he hasn’t quite been burned yet. He will. Maybe by you, maybe by some other man who decides he broke a rule. Someone might think he is too, a sinner. He falls right into your trap. You decide to really play up the trauma and you raid your minibar. Fourteen-year-old you was right about alcohol, it does let you float above everything, you aren’t happy but you are above everything. He knocks on your door and you pretend to be drunker than you are. After lying straight to his face while you put on yet another facade, you kick him out. Tell him that he can’t fix you. Oops, maybe that was more of the truth than you wanted him to know.

There's a slight flaw in this new plan of yours. You were always a bit too sensitive about rapists, perhaps it's a combination of your youth, your womanhood, and the fact that you have sympathy. And rage. You are told by Hotch, who if he wasn't your boss you are sure you’d have told him to go to hell by now, to set yourself up to be an almost rape victim. They tell you that of course, it won’t happen. They’ll be watching you. Problem is you don’t trust him with your life. Shouldn’t trust him with your life, he is of course the one who loaded the gun for the man you shot you. You agree, because you have to, you can’t say no without fielding questions and avoiding pointed stares. It’s too much for you though, it's like you’re in your own personal horror movie. You turn up the music and you block out their calls. You do not want to hear from them right now. It all goes south when you accost the man who wants to take you for himself. You are reprimanded for your actions but you don’t give a single fuck.

It's time for the next step in your plan. Justice. Or as some would call it, murder.

You go back to your hotel with the rest of the team so they don't suspect anything of you. They never do. Later, you’ll go for a walk to clear your head, you’ll make sure someone hears you leave. You’ll track down this son of a bitch and you’ll make sure that he doesn’t live to see another day where he can create evil. You’ve always thought the law did its job, but Hotch says that he’ll have to be let go because there isn’t enough evidence now that you’ve ruined everything. He doesn't say that in as many words. His stoic nature allows him to be ruthless without saying anything, which works for him because no one can ever call him out on subtext. If the law doesn’t care about women, you will. You corner William Lee and you point your gun at him. He smirks at you and you’re glad he does, it makes your job that much more satisfying. You fire at him. You’ve been shot at now, you know how it feels, you watch as the life in him slowly leaves his eyes and it’s more addicting than anything you’ve ever felt. His blood pours onto the pavement much like yours dripped onto your floor. You think it would be more enjoyable if you had his blood on your hands. If you could feel the life leaving him. Next time.

The team finds you, gunshots are very loud, one more point to a knife. You tell them it was self-defense. They mistake the slight shake in your voice as fear, not adrenaline, the good kind. That's on them though. Elle Greenaway does not get scared, she creates fear. You can tell that they don’t 100% believe you, and they shouldn't, but they accept it anyway. You know someone is going to corner you after this, ask you what really happened. You decide that you’ve had enough of chasing killers. Now you’ll be the killer, being chased by them while you’re hunting rapists.

Back when you were new at the BAU and JJ’s smile still gave you butterflies you wondered how they all fell so easily together. Reid and Gideon had chess, Morgan and Garcia had, whatever they had, JJ, Reid, and Morgan were like siblings, Hotch and Gideon the heads of the family. And then there was you. You didn't quite fit in, not yet at least. You wondered how they could make bonds with people that could very well be shot and killed in the coming case. How they could make themselves vulnerable to that kind of destruction. It was better to be cold, it was better to not let them in.

Too bad you always were bad at keeping your promises. You let them worm their way into your heart. It makes saying goodbye oh so much harder. Somehow, you don’t quite regret it though, it made your time amongst the blood enjoyable. Well, as enjoyable as it can be here. You still stand by your opinion that no family built on murder can be steady. It will crumble, and you will not be here to see it fall.

You open your booklet filled with men who make you seethe. When you were very young you assumed that monsters had a certain look to them. That they had red eyes filled with darkness, claws, to scratch you with. You thought if you saw a monster on the street you’d know it. Sadly, the monsters of the world live not in the shadows, but in the light. They are your baseball coaches and math teachers. Every time you arrested one, you heard echoes of the same flawed speech. I never suspected anything, he seemed so normal. There is no normal, it’s an illusion we hold to make ourselves feel safe in our own skin. We shouldn’t feel safe in our skin, that's what kills you.

Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, catch a rapist by his toes, if he hollers, let him scream, so much fun for you and me.

Your hand picks Caden Mechein. Kansas, victim count three, blondes. You take the train, pay in cash, your hair is dyed red and you cut it to a pixie cut so you won't be quite as recognizable to Garcia. Your baseball hat and sunglasses should help with that. You’ve changed your fashion, it fulfills a fantasy you didn't know you had. You dress like a punk now, good thing your mother can’t see you she’d have a fit. You sit alone as the train fills up, no one asks to sit with you, like they know you’re dangerous. Good. You want them to be afraid of you. You stare out the window the entire trip, images flash in your head of what you're about to do. You watch the fields and fields of corn come into visions and you know it's almost time.

After a day and a half of planning and anticipation, you’ve arrived in Topeka. It’s a nice place, different from the east coast. People are friendlier here, you’ve heard about the midwestern nice but it’s different to actually experience a stranger smiling at you while you walk down the street. The darkness conceals you like you conceal the knife on your hip, hidden behind your leather jacket. You have latex gloves in your pocket because as much as you would love to feel his blood on your hands you aren’t going to risk leave fingerprints

You reach Caden’s house, his lights are off, he’s asleep. Perfect. You will kill him in his own home just like you were almost killed in yours. You jimmy the lock, breaking a window is too loud, too suspicious you do not want him to know you’re coming. Suspense is key for murder, it builds up in their heart and makes it just that much better when they see the knife in your hand. Or you’d think, it is your first kill after all.

You make your way into this sicko’s home, you find his bedroom. And you knock on the door. He curses like Jesus Christ will save him from you, he is no match for you. He is out of bed now, he’s asking you what you want. Your blood, you answer him. He pales, just like he’ll look when his blood is drained from his neck. You corner him in the corner of his room and you bring your knife out from your holster. It glimmers in the moonlight, because he feels so safe and secure in his room that he sleeps with a curtain open. Well, felt safe, you doubt he’s very secure with you spinning the knife in front of his face. Why are you doing this, he pleads with you like that will make you walk out of the room right here and abandon your plans. Men always were stupid and arrogant. You tell him that he knows exactly why, that this is his comeuppance for what he did to those girls.

Enough is enough, time to get what you want. You grasp the knife, marveling in its weight, in one bold stroke you slice his neck open. The blood gushes, it does not touch you, you made sure to step back before the flooding began. You watch mesmerized as the floor begins to stain crimson. Caden gasps for air, his feet give out and he falls on the floor. His head hits the wall with a satisfying thud. Eventually, the bleeding stops and you walk away, leaving his corpse to cool before it burns in hell.

Once upon a time, you would have added a signature, perhaps a Birdsfoot Trefoil, signifying revenge. That would be too clean and sweet for the police so you don’t give them it. You wonder how long it will take them to realize that this is the work of a vengeful woman. You hope it doesn't take long, you want the world to see your wrath.

Just like you suspected when you returned home from William Lee’s case, Hotch pulls you into his office. You can see the anger in his eyes and you know then and there that he could kill you with his bare hands and not think twice about it. He is angry because he knows what you’ve done, he’s a firm believer that the law does no wrong and he is a coward.

“Elle, I need to know if you murdered William Lee.”

You scoff at him, “of course not, who do you think I am?” He does not reply and you think that says more than if he had written a thesis about you.

“No Hotch, I didn’t commit cold-blooded murder while on the clock for the FBI”,

You both know that that isn’t true, only one of you is sure.

“Why do you care about him anyway? Relate to him, maybe?”

“Do not throw those kinds of accusations at me, Agent Greenaway.”

He throws your official title as a way of saying that you are no longer his friend, lucky for you never once thought he was, you are not in the habit of befriending men who would see your death as inevitable. You know that this is the end of your stay at the federal bureau of investigation. Might as well go out with a bang.

“Right, of course, my bad. Forgot you think you’re better than everyone else. I have news for you Hotch, you’re a shit father and a terrible husband. You never see your family, you’re so caught up in the high of catching killers your son barely knows who you are. I don’t think you’re any better than the men we catch”

“Elle, I understand you are still recovering from what happened to you but you can not speak to me this way. You’re suspended two weeks without pay, and are pending investigation”

He uses your name now because he knows you are right, he wants you to see him as the good man he sees in the mirror. You want his mirror to crack under what it sees.

“What happened to me? Oh yeah, when you let me get shot because you don’t give a fuck about me or any of the women on this team. I'm not suspended, I’m never coming back to this hell hole. I quit,”

You leave your badge and your gun on his desk. You won’t be needing them.

You ride the high of your first kill like you the first time you got high in highschool. You feel powerful, and like you’ve done the right thing. Out of curiosity, you check the news on your train to Nevada, they don’t mention Caden’s sins. They make him a saint that died as a tragedy not out of righteousness. You’ll make sure they know the sins of your next body.

After you slice this one's throat, you’ll dip your finger in his throat much like Randall Garner did to you, and write ‘scum’ on his forehead. He does not deserve honor in his death, he deserves shame.

Your body count racks up and you’ve never felt both powerful and powerless. You are making a difference, these men who think themselves above the law are finding that they are not above your law. The look on their faces when they understand what’s coming for them is a thing of elegance. When they see all 5’8 of you and realize that they will lose to a woman. Their crimes have not been forgotten, will never be forgiven, and now they will die because of them. They hurt women so now they will be hurt by a woman.

Every day you read the news about another man who you must add to your list and you are disheartened. You are sick of this tango for one. You long for the days of your past when you were happy. Those days are over though, this is your job now and you do it well. You do this for all the past versions of you, some more innocent, some more jaded, all you, all beautiful. For every girl who has ever felt victimized by a man who considers himself mighty. For every girl who still lives in bliss about what the men around her are capable of. You will try to make sure she never learns. You do this for every beautiful, broken girl and so that there needs not to be more of you, this club needs no more members. It’s time they make a new club for girls who are happy, you wish you could have been one of them.

Spanish translation (I am not a native spanish speaker forgive me for any errors):

'Fueron la cosa favorita de tu papá, cariño. Lo echo de menos cada dia.' It was your father's favorite thing sweetheart. I miss him every day

'Sea bilingual mija, los estudios dicen que es buena para tu cerebro. ¿No quises saber la lengua materna de sus ancestros?' You should be bilingual my daughter, the studies say it's good for your brain. Don't you want to know the mother tongue of your ancestors?

Tag List!: @royalpenelope @scandinavian-punk @theatreandfeminism @babey-jj @hellskitchensmurdock

#elle greenaway #Elle greenaway fic #criminal minds fic #criminal minds fanfiction #lucy's fics!#mine!#criminal minds #let me know what you think! 🥺

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danipixel · 4 years ago

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Wherever the Force May Go pt2

Tags: @maulieber @botherbother-blog @mother-0f-monsters @zabrak-show @alicedoestheinternet @laoness

Summary: Daia found a new opportunity on Mandalore. Did she make a mistake in coming? She hasn’t decided yet. Her new employer may decide for her.

Part 1

It was late afternoon when Daia finished unloading the last of her things from the Fever Dream into the room she had been granted by the new lord of Mandalore. The guest room was enormous with large windows that gave a beautiful view of the city below. The sun was just starting to dip below the horizon beyond the bio-dome’s edges. She’d have to thank her new employer for the accommodations.

Still in a bit of shock from the events of the morning, she continued her small tour of her quarters. The bed was by no means small and covered with lush blankets and pillows. The sitting area sported a large table with intricately carved lilies on the legs and edges as well as equally lavish cream chairs. The walls were covered in beautiful paintings depicting the history of Mandalore. Satine's taste in decor was still all over the room. Taking a seat in the unfairly comfortable chair, Daia now had time to think about everything that just happened this morning. Her overconfidence and her mouth may have just gotten her into more trouble than she first realized. The new Mand’alor was clearly well versed in use of the Force, and the dark side at that. The dark side never frightened her before but she knew just how dangerous those that regularly surrender themselves to its power can be. Shit. This may have been a mistake. Daia didn’t get much time to think about her new position on the planet before she sensed Maul and the other Force wielder outside her door.

The door slid open and there stood Maul, an intense look of anger painted across his crimson face. He let out a low growl as he spoke, "I don’t appreciate being lied to." His eyes burned into hers as his presence filled the room. His partner stood just behind him sporting a similar look.

"I'm sorry but, what are you talking about?" Daia felt anger rolling off of the two in waves leaving sparks and crackles as it flowed around her. She couldn't help the sudden urge to run or maybe fight. Anything but just stand there.

The two men stepped fully into the room, which despite its size, now felt much too small. "What are you doing here, Jedi?" The sound of lightsabers igniting echoed through the room.

"Is this because I can use the Force? I’m not a Jedi." Not anymore. Continuing to back away, Daia's hands stayed low and near the edge of her jacket where her sabers were tucked away.

"Liar! The stink of the Order is all over you.” Maul spit the accusation at her as he leapt towards her, black blade aimed at her neck. In a flash she brought up her twin sabers to block the blow as she barely dodged out of the way. A flurry of blows and flashes of black light filled her vision. Each strike caught by her sabers with a loud hiss as she backpedaled further into the room. He was fast. Terrifyingly fast. Had the Force not guided her movements, she'd be dead. Adrenaline surged through her body feeding her fight or flight response. A dark tendril from the Force followed the reflex and reached out to her mind. Daia grabbed hold of it and roughly pulled it into herself, fuelling her body, sharpening her senses, and adding speed to her reflexes. Off to the side, she felt more than saw the red blade come down on her and quickly ducked out of the way and past the two men.

Holding her blades in a defensive position, she shouted at the two, "I didn’t lie to you!" The two men split and came at her from the sides simultaneously, striking hard at Daia. She almost buckled under the force of their combined attack. Her arms screamed in protest as she caught the attacks. Her violet blade clashed with black as her silver caught red before she twisted back out of the way. The black blade again came at her to hold her in place. She twisted again but this time flowed under Maul’s arm and brought her elbow into his ribs hard to allow her an opening to back away. He let out a hiss and kicked at her legs as she danced away.

Anger filled the room as Maul pointed with his blade and the larger man circled around her. Daia's blades remained up and directed at each warrior, ready to catch any attack that came for her. "I'll ask you one more time Jedi, why did they send you here?"

This time the attack came from behind but she was ready and used the Force to fling the heavy ornate table directly into the larger Zabrak, knocking him into the wall. "No one sent me. I’m not a fucking Jedi! I haven’t been one for 7 years!" Maul stayed where he was, black saber still pointed in her direction as a snarl painted his face.

The larger one rose from the wall and rushed her, blade swinging in a wide arc. She managed to deflect the blow but the force of the strike immediately caused her arms to burn once again. My arms are gonna break if he keeps this up. He finally growled in her face, "Dooku’s orders then."

"Count Dooku?" She spat back as she jumped backwards. "No. Fuck him! I want nothing to do with him!" The Force then seized her and threw her back into the opposite wall, knocking the air from her lungs. Not knowing which man had done that she immediately prepared for their next attack.

Maul held up his hand to stop the other from attacking. Was he planning on killing her himself? "If you’re not with the Jedi, or Dooku, then why come to Mandalore?" He lowered his blade but did not deactivate it. The other man did the same. The rage from the two slowly started to recede but the anger in the room still simmered from all three occupants.

Daia followed suit and lowered her sabers, leaving them humming at her sides. "It’s like I said. I used to smuggle for Death Watch and the Prime Minister. I came back because I saw a business opportunity."

"And you no longer receive orders from the Jedi?" Maul stared at her as if he was trying to read her thoughts. Her mental defenses instinctively strengthened to prevent any intrusion. He wasn't getting into her mind without a fight.

She let out a sigh, "I still have some friends in the Order but that's as far as the connection goes. I have no plans to go back."

The taller man moved closer to Maul and continued to growl at Daia. "More Jedi lies."

"Look, if you just wanted to kill me, why not do it this morning?" She snapped at both of them, anger rising back to the surface. This game of theirs was getting tiring. Either kill me or let me leave.

Maul finally deactivated his saber and stood with his hands clasped behind his back. His partner did the same. "I was curious and truthfully, a Jedi offering to smuggle for me was unexpected."

"Not a Jedi." She took the hint that the fight was over and put her sabers away, this time she left them on her belt instead of tucked in her jacket. The instinct to fight was slowly receding from her body. Now it was replaced with confusion and irritation. Was this whole thing a fucking test?!

"So you keep saying." Maul took a few steps closer but made no move to retrieve his weapon and finish the ex-Jedi.

Taking a few steps toward the man and crossing her arms, Daia asked, "So what do you want from me?"

Maul paced back and forth, prowling in front of her as he answered. "I'm always in need of people with talent. Besides your claim of being an accomplished smuggler, you managed to sneak your way past the entirety of Death Watch and into my throne room. You've just proven you can hold your own in combat, and you have connections to Coruscant that could prove useful one day."

"So, you still want me to work with you." This day just keeps getting more and more interesting.

From behind Maul, his counterpart still seemed to have opinions. "Are you sure about her, Brother? She could still be a Jedi spy or assassin." He continued to growl in her direction as he stared.

Are you kidding me? Did he really still think she was here to kill them? She was done being friendly today. "Are you here for a reason big guy, or are you just here to insult me and look intimidating?" Wait. Did he say Brother?

Maul held up his hand and answered before his brother could say another word. "Savage is my apprentice as well as my brother. Where I go, he goes."

"Well for your information, Savage, Jedi don't use spies and assassins. You have them confused with senators." Daia stepped closer to the much larger man and glared up at him. Her patience was wearing atom thin.

Maul placed himself between the two and stared down his brother. "If you two are quite finished." Savage backed down and stepped aside. Maul's attention focused back to Daia. "You will remain in the city until I can be sure of your loyalties."

Stay in the city? How is she supposed to do her job? "When do I start my work then?"

Maul stepped closer and into her personal space. She held firm and held his gaze as he spoke. "Tomorrow. You will join us for our morning briefings. If you plan on being our private smuggler, I expect you to learn how things are done here now. You’ll be retrieved in the morning." There it was. She was a pet for now. Better a pet than dead. She and Maul studied one another for a moment before he pulled away from her proximity. The lord of Mandalore turned to make his way to the door, Savage falling in behind him.

Before they could leave she couldn't help but say, "Whatever you say, handsome." For whatever reason, maybe adrenaline, she was feeling brave this evening. Brave or stupid. If he wanted to test her, it was only fair that she do the same.

Maul let out a growl and was back in her space in an instant, flaming golden eyes burning into hers. "I'll let you know now that attempts at flattery will not gain you any favor." There was no anger, no threat behind his words.

Still feeling brave she leaned forward into his space now and couldn't help but smile. "Stating facts is not flattery."

"Hmm, is that so?" Maul narrowed his eyes at Daia as he studied her face once more before turning again and leaving her alone in her now destroyed room.

There was carnage left all throughout the guest quarters. The table was salvageable but one of the chairs was shattered and there were scorch marks in the floor and on the walls. One of the paintings was completely cut in two. At least the bed was still in one piece. Once again left alone to her thoughts and the Force, she sat on the bed and let out long slow breaths trying to center herself. Slowly but surely the anger and fear from the last few minutes receded and with it, the touch of darkness she had grasped. Her whole body shivered as she let go of what she had tapped into. It was a powerful partner in a fight but left a terrible taste in her mouth and made her skin feel too tight if held onto for too long. How the other two could bear it, she had no idea.

She went about cleaning up the room so that she could maybe get some sleep. Did I really say that? I did. I called him handsome after he tried to decapitate me. Exhaustion had finally set in and Daia needed to rest and hopefully clear her mind. As she pulled off her boots and went about her night time rituals she made a mental note to run through many more training programs with P4R-E. If something like that fight happens again, she had to be better prepared. Her whole body ached from the force of the earlier attack. Maul was skilled. More skilled than most Jedi she'd known. And Savage's size gave him a terrifying amount of power behind his blows. She was convinced that he could have shattered her arms with ease had Maul not stopped him. They really were testing me.

She settled into bed, expecting an early morning the next day. Before sleep took her she whispered out to the Force, “Please no visions tonight.” She settled into a mostly dreamless sleep. The only dreams that came to her consisted of the same flaming eyes and crown she had seen in the Force before. This time a face filled in the space between the features. The same red and black face of the man that just made her life much more complicated.

#fanfic #darth maul #star wars tcw #oc #Daia Veeral #It's totally normal for your boss to try to kill you #right?

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motherfuckingprincessofcolchis · 7 years ago

Note

The Saber walks up from behind as stealthily as she can, (managing to only knock over one chair and a baking tray in the process), hugging the Caster in an attempted, yet failed, surprise.

“Oh-? Saber? It’s not like you to sneak up on someone like that,” Medea said with a big smile even though Saber’s attempt at stealth was nothing but a train-wreck. She wrapped one arm around the Lily’s back and gently placed her other hand on top of the girl’s head, gently rubbing her hair.

“Thank you. To get a hug from a girl as sweet as you… Why, I wonder what I must have done to make it look like I deserved one. Thank you again, Saber.” She didn’t want to admit how much warmth the embrace had brought to her heart, but Caster truly was grateful.

#princessofknights #;saber lily #ask #sorry I only just answered this... I wanted to make sure I could do it as well as your ask deserved

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soulgathered-archived · 2 months ago

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His hands are gently as they press against his daughter’s face. The rain was falling fast and thick, and if Merlin had been any slower, the hypothermia would’ve set in. “Sh,” he hummed gently when he felt her stir under his touch. “Keep strength in reserve. You’ll be fine.” She had to be fine, right?

Of course she would. Arturia was Merlin’s daughter, after all. A short whistle to the scouts, cath palug bounding to his side in its bigger form. “Let’s get her home, cath palug. May I?” It was polite, of course, to ask. Yet he knew the beast would let him put Arturia ‘pon its back, and secure her with his cloak.

“Let’s get you home.”

"...merlin?" it's barely a whisper but she knows he heard her. he always did. arturia only stirs a little bit when she is lifted up. it feels safe - it feels like her early childhood when she would rush towards the mage and find herself engulfed in a warm hug. the fur too is familiar to her and she sighs, sinking into its warmth.

arturia turns her head away from merlin, too ashamed of what had happened. if she was supposed to be king then she could not always rely on him to come to her rescue. she does not care that she is young, that she has yet to draw caliburn from the stone. they all had such high hopes for her - savior, gentle king, just king - but how could she be all that, if she could not even deal with the small things?

she had heard in the village that the people struggled with bandits in the nearby hills... arturia had tried to talk to them, see what had forced the bandits into such a life but things escalated and a blow to the head had her stumble backwards into the river...

her hands grip cath palug's fur, shaking. she would need to train harder. would need to get better...

lily sits up, eyes staring at the wall of her room. servants usually did not need sleep but sometimes it felt nice to simply take a break and not think. only that she found herself haunted by the memories of the soul she was based on.

she knows she is not the real young arturia pendragon. she is just regrets and wishes for a young girl who had not been able to live her life like she wanted. she had felt in the dream.

arturia did not want to call the mage merlin, she had wanted to call out to him, to cry and be hugged by her ' tad ' she had wanted to apologize for being foolish, she had wanted to cry because things hurt. all the things lily could do now...

she stands up, bare feet touching the cold floor and wrapped in her blanket she makes her way through the now quiet facility. knocking against merlin's door, the girl looks inside, an apologetic smile on her lips.

"I had a nightmare..."

left for dead ( accepting ) // @avaloniamagus .

#avaloniamagus #answered asks ( saber lily ).#[ hi tick :) ]

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halothenthehorns · 3 years ago

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THE YULE BALL

Sirius was practically brimming over with excitement as he went to read about Harry's first real date. Even if it wasn't with a girl of his choosing, this was still a really big moment for his pup, that they were going to get to hear about first hand!

Harry was paying no mind to his loads of holiday homework,

"I doubt anyone is," James agreed.

nor was seemingly anyone as the Gryffindor tower was packed to the brim with holiday stayers. One recurring commotion were students randomly sprouting feathers, as Fred and George's Canary Creams seemed to have taken off.

Causing all five of them more pleasant chuckles, they really hoped they'd get to keep hearing more about that.

It didn't take the students long to be leery of any food handed to them by a stranger, as well they should be for some time as George admitted to Harry they were already working on their next thing.

"Yes!" Sirius cheered, nearly bouncing in his seat in hopes for this.

Harry made a mental note never to accept so much as a crisp from Fred and George in future.

"Can't believe you haven't learned that lesson already, honestly," Remus shook his head at Harry.

He still hadn't forgotten the Ton-Tongue Toffee.

"Neither have I," Lily agreed mercilessly.

Winter had fallen on the castle with the usual amounts of thick snow and icy windows. The Durmstrang ships riggings were freezing over, and the Beauxbatons carriage looked like an iced pumpkin out on the grounds. The house-elves were keeping spirits up with meals full of rich foods and savory stews,

"Don't even Sirius," Lily scolded before he could look pleadingly towards the kitchen. "We've only just had breakfast."

Sirius pouted and grumbled something as a few choice dishes came to mind, but kept going nonetheless.

with Fleur being the only one to complain of such things.

Lily scoffed deep in her throat, and here she'd actually given the girl some credit after her handling of the dragon. Clearly her personality still wasn't looking any better.

Speaking loudly in her french tones about how this food was to hearty,

"Who complains about the food!" Sirius demanded like someone had just insulted his baby. "I've said a few bad things about my school, but never that!"

"Clearly she doesn't appreciate the house-elves attempts," James sniffed in agreement.

which Harry heard her saying loudly as he passed, Ron trying to keep ducked down behind him,

"Poor thing probably doesn't want to be seen by anyone for a while," Remus winced.

as Fleur said to anyone who'd listen about how this would affect her fitting into her dress.

Hermione grumbling about how full of herself that one was, but Ron blatantly ignored that by launching the question at her of who she was going with.

"Didn't he already ask her that?" James chuckled.

"I hope she gives an original response every time," Sirius smirked.

He kept springing this question on her, hoping to startle her into a response by asking it when she least expected.

Causing all five of them some more snickers, half hoping that worked as they were curious, but mostly knowing it wouldn't and just enjoying the show.

Hermione just frowned at him, stating she wasn't telling as they'd just make fun of her.

"Is it a Slytherin?" Remus yelped in surprise.

"Can't think of anyone else who would make her think that," Lily raised a sharp brow.

Sirius on the other hand snorted and stated, "please, Ron would make fun of anyone who Hermione went with if it wasn't him, even Harry."

"He's just having some fun," James agreed with a shrug.

Malfoy overheard this, and laughed cruelly about why anyone would ask her to the ball.

"And I'll bet anyone you asked turned you down laughing," James snapped back at once.

Not a chipmunk like Mudblood.

Sirius felt his nose wrinkle with distaste as he forced himself to say that, really wishing Harry would pull that kids tongue out of his mouth at some point.

Harry and Ron went for their wands, but Hermione superseded all of them by calling out a greeting to Moody.

"That timing," Lily grinned victoriously.

Malfoy went paler than usual and turned on the spot looking for the danger, but Moody was still at the staff table finishing dinner.

"Even better!" Remus laughed outright.

Hermione gave Malfoy a scathing smile as she called him a twitchy little ferret, all three friends laughing as they left for the stairs.

"Oh I hope Moody never leaves now," Remus praised, shoulders still shaking.

While the others agreed that was the second best option, they all knew they'd want one other person in there more.

Ron though, was still staring at Hermione as their laughter settled down, telling her her teeth did look different.

She tried to play it off, asking different how, and Ron repeated they just were.

"Different how?" Lily repeated in surprise, Harry hadn't said anything about it.

Harry just shrugged for an answer, he hadn't spotted anything unusual.

Hermione pointed out she wasn't exactly going to keep those sabers Malfoy had given her,

"It would have been a point of conversation though," Sirius couldn't help but smirk.

but Ron insisted they were much more straight and normal sized than before that hex.

"Oh," Remus said with the hints of a smile starting to appear.

"I don't get it," James cocked his head to the side. Maybe it was because he'd only ever heard descriptions of her and never seen her, but he wasn't sure what was going on here.

Sirius didn't either, but he was hoping the book would explain better.

Hermione full blown grinned, and Harry saw it to, it was a different smile.

"Always love it when that side of her comes out," Lily agreed absently as she listened intently for what Hermione had gotten up to.

She finally admitted that when Pomfrey had held up a mirror and told her to stop when they were back to normal, Hermione had just let her go a bit longer. Her parents weren't going to be happy, as dentists they felt magic shouldn't mix with teeth and they'd been happier with her braces, but- she cut herself off when she spotted Pigwidgeon.

"Aw, I kind of wanted her to keep going," Sirius pouted even though he was laughing his butt off towards the end anyways.

"Can you blame the poor thing," James demanded while still chuckling. "Who hasn't tried to use magic to fix some physical problem. At least this sounds doable, I've always wondered how many times Madam Pomfrey's had to fix some idiots attempts to use an Engorgio Charm on his-"

"Okay James," Lily quickly cut him off, "if she never told you the number, then making one up isn't a solution."

James stuck his tongue out at her while Harry tried to remember how to breathe past his laughter and Sirius moved on.

Ron's owl was twittering loud as ever sitting on top of an ice encrusted banister, a note tied to his leg.

"Sirius replied," Remus pointed out.

"Thank you captain obvious," Sirius snorted, "what I was going to ask was, why is Pig in the middle of a corridor? He should be waiting for Ron in his common room if he missed breakfast."

"Guess he found him earlier than that," Harry shrugged.

People passing him were pointing and laughing,

Lily couldn't help a twitch of unease, feeling that wasn't really safe as anything Sirius sent was dangerous in itself and shouldn't be on display, but they were all in such chipper moods lately she didn't want her paranoia to drag anyone else down.

and a group of third year girls even stopped to coo at how pretty the little thing was.

Ron stormed forward and snatched up his owl in one fist, scolding his pet for not bringing the letter straight to its recipient! Pig was still hooting shrilly at all the attention while the group of girls looked scandalized at Ron.

"Oh he ain't hurting him," Sirius rolled his eyes.

Ron snapped at them to scram, still holding his minute owl in his fist while doing so, who seemed to be enjoying his wingless flight through the air.

Sirius had to read just a little bit louder over more laughter that caused.

Once they had left he handed the note over to Harry, then the three left to head up to Gryffindor tower for some privacy. Everyone still at dinner, Harry read the note aloud that started with Sirius' congratulations on getting past that dragon, whoever had put his name in the Goblet wouldn't be feeling so sure of themselves now.

"Thank you Sirius," Remus rolled his eyes with sarcasm, not disagreeing, but still wishing his friend wasn't trying to rub that in. Harry was still in danger, and Padfoot encouraging that was as bad as Ron.

"Well I'm not wrong," Sirius shot back.

Sirius had been going to suggest Harry send a curse at the dragon's eye, its most vulnerable spot,

"After, you know, he got his screaming fit out of the way, that's still pretty good advice," James chuckled, still feeling a small spot in him vibrating with worry as he remembered Sirius' reaction, or lack there of in this case, regarding those dragons. That feeling wasn't fading until he knew exactly what Azkaban had done to his brother.

Hermione interrupted to remind that's what Krum had done.

"Thank you for the insert Hermione," Lily snorted.

Going back to Sirius' note that said how impressed he was.

Harry beamed with pride, unbelievably feeling that washing through him like never before. He couldn't really remember a time from his past where someone who meant something to him like Sirius had said that to him, and it felt remarkably good. Sure the four around him had tried to do so sporadically, but he'd never let himself take it to heart, always thinking they were just saying things to be nice. Maybe it was because of the way Sirius had put it, maybe it was just that memory being reestablished, but Harry was certain that was the first time he'd ever felt like this before.

Then he followed that up with the warning for Harry not to get complacent.

"There's the paranoia I was waiting for," Remus chuckled, and was pleased to see James join in as quick as Sirius this time. He'd long since noticed the father attempting to smother his agitation towards Sirius the past few times he'd come up, and Harry's obvious glee at receiving such praise from his godfather was likely to get under James' skin as much as anything, but James really did seem to be trying to shake it off today.

Reminding this was only the first task, and to keep his eyes open especially around the person they'd previously discussed, and to keep out of trouble.

"Well you've just turned into a right old killjoy," Remus shot at Sirius, a gleam of revenge shining in his eyes as he held his hand out expectantly. "I've never heard such a thing from a Marauder, I think I'm going to need your card back."

Sirius happily stuck his tongue out at his mate for that, stating back, "never happening, you'll have to remove my hand to get it."

James was laughing without remorse at the pair, so Lily had to be the voice of reason as she cut in, "can you two kiss and make up for that later? I actually want to get to the ball already."

Harry groaned in true disagreement, but Sirius was certainly excited enough to get back.

He signed off, and Harry tucked the letter away with a spot of annoyance as he compared his Godfather to their DADA teacher.

"I'll take that as a compliment!" Sirius agreed pompously.

"Still proves my point," Remus' smirk widened.

Sirius had to fight with himself for a moment to convince himself not to have a poke at Remus turning on him about this, as he knew he deserved.

Both kept telling Harry like he walked around with his eyes shut all the time.

"You mean you don't!" James demanded, now eyeing Harry like he'd gone mad. "It makes for some great fun!"

"You'd know," Lily agreed, "weren't you the one who claimed you'd gone temporarily blind as an excuse that time you 'accidentally' hit Keramik with that babbling curse."

"A true tragedy that day," James agreed solemnly much to the not very suppressed amusement to those around him. "Thank Merlin it wore off, who knows who else I might have hit without meaning to."

Hermione soothed he was just looking out for Harry, and suggested he'd stay out of plenty of trouble if he'd get to work on that egg.

Ron brushed her off, saying it was the holidays and they needed to have some fun, then he invited Harry to a game of chess. She agreed for now and watched several recklessly brave pawns and a violent bishop own Harry.

"Wizard's chess really is the best," Remus agreed, though with some lingering hatred at the reminder as it was usually a rat who played with him the most often, James and Sirius didn't always have the patience to play the game through.

Harry woke on Christmas day with someone having large eyes staring at him nose to nose.

Harry startled like that had happened all over again, and the others looked pretty unsure as well. Was Ron trying to be funny, or?

Harry screeched Dobby's name in shock as he scrambled back, making the elf fall off the bed.

The small amount of fear that had appeared evaporated with plenty of laughter now that they understood. Even Harry looked mildly more relaxed though still too wide eyed as he shook himself from that shock.

He snapped at him not to do that!

"Why was he?" James demanded after a healthy chuckle.

"Second time he's done that actually," Lily reminded with smile, "so I think that's just how he thinks you're supposed to be awoken."

"Well someone needs to show him otherwise," Harry grumbled as he rubbed at his chest.

Dobby quickly apologized, saying he'd only wanted to give Harry a Merry greeting.

"What a festive morning," Remus chuckled.

Reminding Harry had said Dobby could come visit.

"Apparently next time you should clarify, when you're awake," Sirius offered helpfully.

Harry agreed it was fine he was here, still feeling his heart rate return to normal as he cautioned in the future just to poke him or something to wake him up.

All four of them were still laughing mercilessly into their hands, Sirius having the worst problems as he tried to read around his laughter. Harry was rolling his eyes at all of them, glad they found it funny, since it hadn't happened to them.

Harry's dorm mates were peaking through their bed curtains sleepily at Harry,

"It's so good to hear Harry's scream of terror just roused them all to his side," Remus smirked.

"Considering the last time Ron did and it wasn't a big deal, you can't blame them for not reacting this time," Sirius tried to mock, though that memory still didn't sit right with him considering the end results, so he quickly kept going to avoid the nasty looks he was getting for bringing that up.

Seamus asking with a still sleep heavy voice if someone was attacking Harry.

"Absolutely," Harry forced out a laugh to try and get past Sirius' awkward comment, "and your quick asking will scare them away."

Harry told them it was just Dobby,

"Actually I tend to find that a cause for concern more often than not," James snorted without really meaning it.

and told them to go back to sleep, but then the boys spotted their presents.

"The most important part of the day," Remus snickered.

All of them quickly got down to unwrapping their gifts, and Harry's attention went back to Dobby who asked if he could give Harry his present now?

"Aww, he got you a present," Lily cooed. "Here I thought he was just up there to collect that sweater from Ron."

"I'm stunned he even thought to do that," Sirius raised a sharp brow. "That's not common of house-elves at all."

"As we've well established," James reminded, "Dobby is not the usual house-elf."

Harry agreed uncertainly, lying on the spot about how he'd gotten Dobby something as well.

"Did we miss a bit where this came up?" Remus asked lightly, watching Harry's suddenly scrambling face as he was clearly struggling how he was going to get out of this.

This was a lie, as it hadn't occurred to him to get the house-elf anything,

Sirius mock gasped with an affronted look at Harry, scolding, "really now, after all he's done for you."

"You're mouth's going to leave you without any presents this year," James tried to threaten.

Even if Sirius couldn't take the joke seriously, it didn't stop him responding, "shove it Prongs, don't you have Santa's sleigh to be pulling."

but he quickly went to his trunk and cobbled together a pair of nasty old socks that had once belonged to his Uncle.

"Talk about a regift," Remus snorted.

"Yeah, I think that was more insulting than anything," Sirius agreed.

Harry still felt pretty bad he hadn't gotten Dobby a proper present, but he had sort of just had it sprung on him, he hadn't even been expecting him to be there this year so he hadn't a chance to do otherwise.

They were even more worn than a normal pair, as Harry usually kept his Sneakoscope tucked away in them for over a year now.

Then all five of them flinched at such a sharp reminder of Harry's last year being brought up so unexpectedly. They'd honestly forgotten about the thing, as the last time it had been mentioned was this time last year when Ron and Hermione had been having a fight over the cat...now they came back and realized that every instance of it being mentioned had been in the presence of one foul little, certainly untrustworthy rat. They were all berating themselves, wishing they'd paid more attention to Ron's gift and what it could have meant, but they all knew they still never would have guessed the end until it was far too late all over again.

Sirius had to take several slow, very deep breaths to remind himself why he wasn't pounding down the streets right now trying to give a long and slow death to that good for nothing ruin on their life, and instead kept reading very loudly past the moment.

He pulled his Sneakoscope out of them and quickly handed them to Dobby, apologizing for them not being wrapped.

Lily forced out a too high pitched giggle she didn't feel, that nasty pit of a feeling coming back to her after so long feeling harder to shake now that she'd had to think about it again.

Dobby was more than delighted with the gift, exclaiming how socks were his favorite clothing!

"Can't imagine why," Remus muttered under his breath. He'd meant to say it louder, but had unintentionally reverted like he always did when he felt tension around him.

Lily heard him anyways, and managed a laugh again that this time was almost normal sounding.

James, looking for any excuse not to burst into tears or fire up like a volcano, quickly latched out and demanded, "and just what is so funny over there?"

"Nothing," Lily quickly tried to appease so they could move past the awkwardness of this for good, "Remus has been over here muttering under his breath like a little nit."

"Ha, Moony did that to me all the time," James grinned, eyes actually managing to lit up on such a good topic. "He'd sit there and make sarcastic comments under his breath about whatever a teacher said, and I'd laugh my arse off. Then when the teacher demanded to know what was so funny, I'd repeat what Remus said, then I'd get in trouble while the student's laughed."

Lily appraised the pair of them, before smiling and not saying a word. Honestly, she had never noticed that.

Sirius forced the biting tension out of himself no matter how much he wanted to do otherwise, at least recognizing his family trying to act like nothing had happened and forcing himself to do the same.

Happily telling that he had seven pairs now, but then telling Harry whoever he'd gotten his socks from had made a mistake, they gave him two of the same.

"Oh no," Sirius deadpanned, "how could you stand for such a travesty Harry!"

Harry did honestly laugh at the dry wit, the genuine noise finally cracking away the poison for now.

Ron mock scolded Harry for not noticing that,

"Oh lookie there," James smirked, "Sirius is mimicking Ron again, I missed that."

"I didn't," Lily rolled her eyes, "he enjoys it far too much."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Sirius pouted at her.

then offered Dobby his maroon socks along with his sweater so that Dobby could mismatch them properly.

Lily still had to repress a sigh of agitation his mother's hard work was just being tossed around like that, she really wished Ron would appreciate this more, but again it was going to such a sweet cause she couldn't hold it against him either.

Dobby was getting overwhelmed as he praised Ron for being such a kind a great wizard like his greatest friend Harry Potter.

"Least Hermione hadn't come in to hear that one," Remus snorted.

Ron tried to brush off the praise, even if he did look rather pleased.

"We all know he loves his attention," Sirius rolled his eyes with just a touch more ire than was called for, Ron's little attitude before still not totally forgotten, but certainly being eased the longer he kept behaving like normal.

Then Ron opened his gift from Harry, and shouted his thanks for the Chudley Cannon hat, jamming the orange color over his red hair.

"Now where's my picture of that?" James snickered at the lovely mental image.

Then Dobby handed Harry his gift, which were socks.

"You give what you get," Lily chirped in a sing song voice.

Dobby explained that he'd made them himself, he'd bought the wool from his own wages!

"Naww," Lily beamed, Dobby really was just the sweetest little thing.

Harry saw that they were Quidditch themed, one being red with broomsticks, the other green with Snitches.

"Actually, you could consider that a matching pair," James smirked.

"Anything Quidditch related will always be taken with gratitude," Sirius agreed sagely.

Harry managed to get out a thanks to Dobby as he pulled them on, and the little elf looked likely to cry with happiness at the sight.

"Aww," Lily couldn't, and wasn't trying to stop, a coo again. Even the boys couldn't stop a pleased look about themselves at Harry responding like this, he really was just such a good kid.

Harry was flushed and muttering under his breath it really wasn't that big a deal, it had just been the right thing to do.

Dobby couldn't stay long after that, telling how they were already working on Christmas dinner as he waved them good-bye and sprinted out. Harry went after his other presents then, finding the Dursleys had sent him a tissue,

"Think they're still bitter about that grate?" James crinkled up his nose, the tendons on his arm standing out showing he wanted to do much more than make a crude comment.

"I know I haven't forgotten," Sirius' smile held no pleasantries even if that was a good memory to him.

"Least it wasn't a used one," Harry shrugged, the others unsure if he was trying to be sarcastic or not.

Hermione a book called Quidditch Teams of Britain and Ireland,

"I want to hear about you reading that the next time she complains about you not doing work," Remus chuckled.

Ron, a bulging bag of Dungbombs;

"Ron handing out the real presents there," Sirius smirked.

Sirius, a handy penknife with attachments to unlock any lock and undo any knot;

"I guess you could have sent him something worse," Lily shook her head fondly at him.

"I'm honestly disappointed he didn't send another Firebolt," James chuckled.

Hagrid a large assortment of candy, and Mrs. Weasley a green sweater with a dragon stitched into it.

"That's not funny," Sirius grumbled with a pout.

"I love it," Harry shrugged, thinking back fondly on all the sweaters he kept getting from her, warmth spreading through him every time he got a new one.

Lily forced the smile to remain on her face even at the small little prick of annoyance she got that she couldn't be the one to do this for her baby.

Harry and Ron went downstairs after that to find Hermione in the common room where they all ate breakfast.

Remus felt another stunning blow to the gut as he realized that was all the presents he'd received, with one stand out. It never ceased to bother him how much he'd just melted back out of Harry's life, not even sending so much as a pence to Harry for Christmas when even the Dursley's had sent him some crap thing just to show they hated the boy. Merlin Sirius was on the run and he'd still been doing better than him! Thankfully he didn't think the others noticed, for now, but he more than hated himself enough for all of them anyways.

They spent the morning having a great time celebrating and playing with Wizard Crackers, which exploded and left gifts behind. After lunch the boys all went out onto the grounds for a snowball fight, but at five Hermione declined watching anymore, saying she had to get ready.

"Think that's the first time I've heard Hermione acting like a girl," Sirius groaned with a suffering sigh. "Who needs three hours to get ready?"

"You will when I give you a black eye and you try to hide it," Lily snapped pleasantly.

Sirius elected to ignore that.

Ron asked what she needed three hours for, and payed for his lapse by George nailing him in the head. After Ron shook the snow off, he still called after her who she was going with, but she ignored him as she went inside.

"He's going to find out in just a few hours now," James chuckled, "can he really not wait tell then and nail his brother back?"

Once seven came around, the boys headed back inside as well, having to get past a drunk Fat Lady to get inside their tower.

"Paintings can get drunk?" Harry asked mildly.

"Sure," Sirius shrugged, "they're constructs of real people after all."

Harry really wanted to ask at some point for details about these portraits and just how human they supposedly could get, how they were made and everything, but knew that would take so long now wasn't the time.

The boys all got ready, clearly feeling self conscious, though none more so than Ron. There was just no other way to describe his dress robes, other than as a dress.

"That poor kid," James said in honest sympathy.

"I get that his mum didn't have the money to go all out," Sirius agreed with a wince, "but did she have to make it as bad as possible?"

Lily couldn't find it in herself to snap at them for that, she couldn't help but agree she did feel bad for Ron about this one.

In a desperate attempt to make them look more manly,

"There's a lost cause before it started," Harry chuckled.

he'd cut off the lacy cuffs and frill, but that only left little strings behind.

Dean was muttering to the pair of them how they'd gotten the best looking girls in their year?

"If they were so good looking, how come they weren't asked out first thing," Sirius snorted.

"Maybe they kept turning people down," James shrugged.

Both boys suddenly realized Remus had gone a bit quite, but they weren't really sure what that agitated look was for, and thinking it may still be some lingering agitation at the rat they weren't going to pester him about it.

Ron tried to say with gusto it was animal magnetism, while picking at a thread.

"Right," Lily drew the word out with pure derision, still honestly having wished Ron had just bailed out on this night he was annoying her so much.

The common room looked odd to Harry without the usual amount of black uniforms, instead everyone was done up in all bright colors. He caught sight of Parvati, wearing a pink dress with gold bangles. Thankfully, she wasn't giggling when Harry greeted her.

"Yet," James smirked.

Harry just gave him a look for that, wondering how long she would last and it started up in this room again as well.

He politely told her how nice she looked, who thanked him then told Ron her sister would meet them down in the Entrance Hall. Ron hardly acknowledged this before demanding where Hermione was.

"He so clearly cares," Lily snorted.

Parvati just shrugged,

"You know, I honestly forget sometimes they're roommates," Lily admitted, as she thought Parvati should have known if she'd left already.

as she asked Harry if he was ready to go. He agreed, while mentally wishing he could just stay in the common room.

"Nah, that's too obvious," Sirius smirked, "you should go down to the Chamber or something, no one can drag you out of there."

"Giant basilisk for a date, that's lovely," James rolled his eyes.

The Entrance Hall looked like a new place with so many people that should have been familiar, but looked so different milling around. Parvati led the way to her sister, wearing a matching dress of design and accessories, but was instead turquoise. She greeted them politely, but Ron didn't even give her a glance as he said hi back,

"Ron's clearly just as enthused about this," Lily rolled her eyes, though honestly she was hoping to look past this and hear about the dance already. She was honestly jealous Hogwarts had never done anything like this while she attended, it sounded like it could be fun if Harry got past the awkward part.

but quickly went down behind Harry in an attempt to hide from Fleur,

"Just imagine if Ron had showed up with her on his arm," James cackled, "they'd make quite the pair."

who was looking even more splendid than usual in a long silvery dress, the captain of the Ravenclaw Quidditch team, Roger Davies, as her partner. Ron waited until they were out of sight before craning around again, demanding of no one where Hermione was.

Lily couldn't help a small little smile to herself, still wondering if Ron even realized why he was asking so much. No friend should be this worked up over who their date was.

Harry caught sight of a group of Slytherins instead, one of which was Malfoy wearing some highly polished black robes that made him look like a pastor.

"Really?" Sirius snorted, "I'd imagine him looking more like a vampire."

"Remember Trocar," James pointed out with an old laugh, "I still swear he's one."

"The best teachers are the monsters," Sirius chipped in with an obvious look at Remus.

He glared balefully back, but did indeed give himself a mental slap and forced himself to stop wallowing for now. Just because he was a terrible person in this skewed future didn't mean that of him now, he hoped. Sirius was never going to Azkaban on his life, so that in turn should mean his useless self would never turn into that, and he'd just have to get over it in the meantime. For now he focused on something much more pleasant and snapped back at his friend, "you referring to me or Snivellus?"

Harry tried, and failed, to turn his snort of laughter into a cough. Sirius, looking remarkably pleased with himself for keeping Remus back on focus, kept going now with a smug look.

Pansy as his date was hanging onto his arms in frilly pink cloth. Crabbe and Goyle seemed more similar and troll like than ever, wearing moss green robes, both without partners.

"Probably too simple minded to even form the question," James scoffed.

The front doors spilled open then, releasing more people into the stream, Krum in front with a pretty girl Harry didn't recognize in blue.

Harry felt something trying to smack him between the eyes when his eyes had passed over that girl, like he really should go back and take another look.

Behind them, the grounds of the school had been magicked into a sort of low maze wall, bushes having been constructed into a path, filled with hundreds of real fairies lighting the way to a stone Father Christmas with a reindeer fountain.

"Oooh," Lily's eyes lit up like their own Christmas. "Now why don't they have that up year 'round, that sounds lovely!"

"Sounds like a great place for some fun," Sirius remarked with quite a different grin.

Lily's smile slipped into a scowl at him, did he have to ruin everything she said.

Harry hadn't noticed the exchange one bit, something very horrid indeed wanting to pop into his mind at any mention of a hedge maze, even one as small and tame as this.

Professor McGonagall made her appearance, announcing the champions come to her side. Harry and Parvati went over to her, Harry noticing McGonagall was wearing a tartan red dress with an ugly thistle on her hat.

"Well don't tell her that," Remus smiled kindly, "I'm sure she tried very hard."

"Really though, I hope someone invited Colin so he could be taking pictures of all this," James groaned with longing. Descriptions weren't cutting it for him, he wanted to see all of this in action!

She had them wait by the doors to the Great Hall before slipping inside. Fleur and Roger had themselves closest to the door, the guy not even seeming to notice he was so dazed by his good fortune he hadn't taken his eyes off Fleur yet.

"Well that's, sweet," Lily grumbled, thinking those two pinheads were still nicer to think about than who she knew Harry was undoubtedly going to spot in a few moments.

Cedric and Cho were close at hand, and Harry quickly looked away so he wouldn't have to watch.

"Hey, you didn't describe how Cho was dressed," Sirius pouted, "I was rather enjoying all the colorful wardrobes." He was looking at Harry in a very obvious way that stated he was not going to keep going until Harry told.

Harry groaned, knowing Sirius was just doing this to further tease him that he noticed such a thing, but finally admitted, "it was royal blue, with some kind of rhinestone pattern."

Sirius gave Harry a winning smile which Harry did not return, so he turned back to the book still laughing far too much in Harry's opinion.

His eyes next fell on the girl next to Krum. His jaw dropped.

"Wow, she must be prettier than Fleur," Remus smirked.

It was Hermione.

"What!?"

It had been a while since all of them had yelped in shock at once, but Sirius had hardly gotten her name out before his face fell in shock so he didn't get much of a chance to laugh at the display.

"Are you telling me that seeing Hermione in a dress really made her unrecognizable," Lily demanded as she eyed Harry who still looked like his face wasn't moving from that open mouth any time soon.

"That's what you caught on," James scoffed, suddenly looking scandalized. "I can't believe she's there with Krum! The Bulgarian champion! Harry warned her he could have a hand in this Goblet mess to begin with, and she's possibly letting him get closer to my son by going on a date with him?!"

"Oh stop being so dramatic James," Lily scolded, a small frown showing she couldn't shake that thought off herself. "Krum's done nothing suspicious so far to warrant anything than a close eye."

"Which is exactly what Hermione's doing, in a different kind of way," Remus muttered.

Lily scowled at him next, thinking all of these boys were picking on her far too much.

She didn't look one bit like her normal self though. Her usual thick bushy hair had somehow been slicked into one elegant bun. She was even holding herself differently, though that could have been the absence of her usual stack of books not weighing her down. Her smile seemed lighter, the recent reduction of her teeth more standout than ever.

"I can't even picture it," Remus stated, blinking slowly with his head cocked to the side.

"The first description we got of her was this bushy haired kid babbling on about books," Sirius agreed, "I'm having processing issues seeing anything else."

"Why do you think it took me so long to recognize her," Harry shook his head, "I'd been staring at that for over three years."

She greeted them happily, but Parvati just gazed with unflattering disbelief.

Lily had an unrestrained, very fond smile on her face for the bookish girl so clearly trying to make something of herself tonight, she wanted to smack Parvati and anyone else who tried to treat her otherwise.

Harry's date wasn't the only one. As the Great Hall was finally opened and Krum steered her inside, his own fanclub were giving Hermione looks of deepest loathing.

"Well them I'll believe," James snorted.

Pansy and Malfoy couldn't even seem to find a single insult to throw at her as she passed.

"First time for everything," Remus chirped.

Ron didn't even seem to notice as he was caught still wandering through the crowd.

"Probably still looking for her without recognizing her," Sirius laughed, now really not wanting to wait until he could hear about Ron's face when he did! That could get priceless!

The champions were led up to a high table where the judges were already seated.

Harry released another groan as once again, he was being put up for all to see.

Decorations like never before hung against the walls, giving the place a gossamer glow. The Hall had been removed of it's usual house tables, and instead there were hundreds of smaller tables seated for people, each placed with lanterns.

"As much as I hate this thing involving you," Lily smiled, "I can't deny this place sounds lovely, I really wish I'd got a chance to see this at school."

"I'm honestly glad it didn't," James shot back, "as you know you wouldn't have gone with me unless it was in our seventh year, so most likely I would have ruined the night."

"At least he admits it," Sirius chuckled when Lily gave him the stank eye.

Harry didn't take it in much as he was more concentrating on his feet and not tripping around, Parvati was steering him so forcefully he felt like a show dog as he kept up.

"At least someone's enjoying themselves," Remus snorted.

He once again saw Ron and Padma, the first of whom was now watching Hermione with narrowed eyes.

"Well, I think he recognizes her now," Sirius said in surprise, that hadn't been the expression he'd been expecting.

Padma was looking sulky.

"Can't blame her if she ditches him at this point," Lily grumbled, jealousy or not, Ron was being rude.

Dumbledore greeted them warmly, but Karkaroff was wearing an expression close to Ron's as he eyed his champion.

"Well that's actually interesting," James cocked his head to the side. "Either he's still being a really good actor and didn't put his champion into getting in close with one of Harry's friends, or he's being a pompus arse who doesn't think Hermione's good enough for his Quidditch champion."

"I can't decide which is more depressing," Remus told him, "so let's let it go for now."

Bagman was wearing bright purple attire smattered with stars and clapping right along with the students, Maxime had donned a flowing lavender silk attire and applauding as everyone as well.

"I didn't hear Hagrid in there," Lily said in surprise.

"Yet," Sirius smirked as he had no doubts.

Crouch however, was not in attendance.

"Well I can't say I'm disappointed," James' frown deepened.

"But that is really odd," Lily blinked spastically.

"Unless he's on his deathbed, it's not like him to not make an appearance," Remus explained for Harry, "he's all about appearances."

Harry had noticed they'd made a few comments like this before, and wanted to ask for more details, anything to keep talk off this stupid dance, but Sirius was honestly bored with the topic of him and wanted to keep going so didn't notice Harry.

Instead, in his seat was Percy.

"What!" Was yelped in shock.

"Yeah, not joking," Sirius promised as he eyed the page like he wished it was.

"Why on earth is Percy there?" James demanded in disgust, he'd been enjoying not having to hear about that Weasley.

"In Crouch's spot," Remus added suspiciously, that couldn't mean what he was thinking, Percy was still too young.

Sirius remained stumped for a moment longer before a nudge from Harry convinced him to keep going in hopes Percy would explain.

As the champions took their seat, he was giving Harry a pointed look which Harry took as taking a seat next to him.

"No," James groaned at once. "Stop being polite already, I don't want to listen to his mouth!"

"You were just wondering why he was there," Lily pointed out, "how easier could it get then sitting down and asking him."

"I wasn't that curious," Sirius groaned, right in line with James.

Percy was wearing brand-new navy robes,

"Must be nice to have his own money now," Remus muttered to himself, his pity for Ron's situation still smarting on the boys behalf.

and an expression of such smugness that Harry thought it ought to be fined.

"I'll get right on that," Lily chuckled.

Before Harry could even ask, Percy was already explaining that he had been promoted, in tones as if he was announcing his ruling as supreme ruler of the universe.

James couldn't deny a bit of a laugh for that though, pompous as he was, he did believe he'd worked hard to get there.

Sirius didn't look nearly as indulgent at the expression as he kept going, Percy agitated him enough that he couldn't pretend to be excited for him if he tried.

He was now Crouch's personal assistant, and was here tonight to represent him.

Harry asked why it wasn't Crouch himself, not looking forward to spending a whole night listening to cauldron bottom reports.

"Like Crouch would be any better," Remus rolled his eyes, "he'd have spent the time going over who those cauldron bottom reports were for."

Percy told how Crouch had not been feeling well as of late. Since the World Cup in fact, he'd been handing a lot of responsibility over to Percy. Crouch had suffered quite a bit at the hands of Blinky or whatever that house-elves name was.

Percy was not endearing Lily to feel too happy for him either, he was starting to act as bad as Crouch in that he found anyone less important than him unworthy of his time, or even learning their name. He really should know how that felt.

It had cost him some drops in his home comfort though, and a man his age couldn't afford that without taking some health problems. That revolting Skeeter woman buzzing around wasn't doing them any favors,

Harry couldn't help but nod in agreement with that at least, finding it an interesting choice of words.

well all in all, the poor man deserved his quiet Christmas. Percy was very glad indeed Crouch knew he could entrust this task to him.

No one in here liked Crouch enough to really spike up concern for this, but it was admittedly depressing to hear about a man coming to the end of his life like this.

Harry had to fight down the urge to ask whether Crouch still called him Weatherby,

"I don't think he could get away with promoting him if he was," James snickered.

"But thank you for the reminder," Sirius chuckled.

but resisted the temptation.

"You've far more restraint than anyone here," Remus shook his head.

Lily didn't even have it in her to deny it.

Instead Harry turned his attention back to the room at large, and saw that there was no food in sight, but instead menus in front of everyone. There were no waiters though, and it took Dumbledore glancing over his own and stating 'pork chops' to his plate to make the food appear.

"Oh," James blinked in surprise, "Now that's rather clever."

"Can you imagine how that works," Lily said with honest curiosity. "The magic must resonate it down to the kitchen, where the elves have the meal prepared."

"Actually it sounds like an even better idea than our usual buffet style," Sirius agreed, "I imagine less goes to waste, or has to be stored and such."

"It must be giving the house-elves a real workout though," Remus offered, "they'll be running around to make sure all the meals get to proper places rather than just sending it all up at once."

The thought hadn't even crossed James and Sirius' minds, but Sirius had already grown bored with this and wanted to move on before he could bother to come up with an argument for Remus.

Now caught on, the rest of the room began ordering their meals as well. Harry glanced at Hermione to see how she'd feel about this new method, as surely it meant more work for the house-elves, but for once his friends attention didn't seem to be on S. P. E. W.

"Bless my soul," James smiled even wider. "Has the girl finally found something human to distract her?"

"Leave her be," Lily giggled as she knew exactly what he and the others were thinking right with her. "She's allowed to have a night off from trying to change the world."

She was deep in talk with Viktor Krum and hardly seemed to notice what she was eating.

"Naww," Sirius cooed at once before all the boys broke out into smatterings of giggles. Lily rolled her eyes indulgently at them, but at least they'd moved on from thinking of Krum as some suspicious ploy. Really, was it so surprising to them Hermione could have a pleasant date?

It now occurred to Harry that he had never actually heard Krum speak,

"Ah, nope, hadn't occurred to me either," Remus admitted in surprise.

but he was certainly talking now, and very enthusiastically at that.

"Harry I think your dates being ignored," Sirius informed Harry, fighting back a laugh as he realized how long Harry had been focused on everything but her, now he was even listening in on his friend instead of engaging the girl.

Harry ignored him.

His thick accent didn't curb his enthusiasm as he described their castle back home, much smaller than this one apparently, but the grounds were even more vast. All of the mountains and lakes, you could fly around them for days!

Karkaroff interrupted before he could go into further details, scolding that if he kept at it, Hermione could figure out where they were hiding.

"So," Lily shrugged, "she still couldn't get in without attending the school."

"Don't go giving her ideas," James smirked.

Dumbledore chuckled, asking Igor if this secrecy was really necessary? Why wouldn't he want visitors?

"Most magical schools don't," Sirius shrugged, "we're too secretive by nature."

Karkaroff was not amused as he told back that he was not the only one who prided himself on thinking that he jealously guarded the secrets of his halls, that they alone knew all the hidden notes of their schools, and had every right to protect that.

"I might agree with him if he wasn't some Death Eater scum," James muttered bitterly, unable to hear this man's name without that image coming back of his slimy arse getting out of Azkaban, leaving Sirius in there when one deserved it infinitely more than the other.

Dumbledore did not agree, peacefully explaining that he in no way thought he knew all of Hogwarts secrets.

"Hum," Sirius tisked, "guess Dumbledore doesn't have our confidence."

"I wish you didn't have your confidence," Lily snipped, "don't make me get a pin cushion to deflate that head of yours again."

Just last night he'd been out in the castle seeking relief, and had come across a marvelous bathroom he'd never seen before.

Remus made a deep throated noise as he tried to suppress his laughter that Dumbledore had somehow turned this conversation into finding a loo!

When he'd gone back to find it later, he couldn't find a trace of it. Perhaps it was only available at a certain time, or at a specific phase of the moon, or was only available when one had an exceptionally full bladder.

By the end no one had a straight face, and in fact Sirius was cut off by his own laughing fit from this. It was James who tried to gasp for air first and state, "okay, Dumbledore wins, I don't think we know about that."

"You think maybe he's right?" Lily asked with honest curiosity, "and there's a place in the school that only appears when you've really got to take a piss?"

"Or any other option he provided," Remus nodded agreeably, "that school has magic built into the walls, it really wouldn't surprise me to learn if some things only exist when you need it most."*

Harry felt a tingling in the base of his skull, somehow Remus phrasing it like that and Dumbledore's experience really should have been clicking together somehow, but Sirius was getting over his laughing fit as well to keep going.

Harry snorted into his plate of goulash.

"I'm sure that made it taste better," Sirius nodded in absolute agreement.

Percy frowned,

"Can he do anything else," James rolled his eyes.

but Harry caught Dumbledore's eye and they shared a smile.

Fleur on his other side was having a one sided conversation, criticizing Hogwarts to Roger.

Lily wasn't the only one with a scowl in place at that declaration. Hogwarts was their home, and they were more than sick of this pretty girl constantly complaining about it. Sirius in particular was really feeling the shine wear off from this princess, she could keep that long blond hair if she'd use it sow her mouth shut.

Mostly going over the decorations of this place, and how they didn't even compare to Beauxbatons, who had large magical ice sculptures that never melted of course, and diamond statues, and nymphs that serenaded them at their meals.

"Sounds like you're all spoiled rotten to me," James grumbled.

"I'd think that would get annoying," Remus huffed, "who needs to be sung to to eat? Does it help with digestion?"

"With luck it would make the sound of her complaining dim slightly," Sirius sniffed.

They didn't have any of that ugly old armor around,

"Hey," Sirius yelped in pure indignation, "that armor has personality!"

"Plus, some of our best ideas came from those seemingly innocent bits of metal everywhere," James beamed. "I can't count how many times we jinxed one to chase down and hug passing students."

"I'm sure Fleur would have plenty to say about that as well," Harry smirked. For some reason he wasn't as put off about Fleur like he saw the others were. Something about her resonated in him as friendly, though she wasn't showing a drop of that now.

and if a poltergeist had even dared entered, he would have been kicked out like that!

"Hey," all three Marauders yelped at that injustice.

"Peeves is awesome," Sirius insisted like he was trying to throw it in some french girls face now.

Lily on the other hand would give her that point at least, even the boys when pressed would admit that Peeves wasn't all good for fun, he could be quite a nuisance.

She'd smacked her table for emphasis there at the end, and Roger, who clearly hadn't taken in a word but instead kept gazing at her open mouthed

"Wow, such intrigue," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Does that really work," James demanded, raising a curious brow. "Just sit there gawking at them, is that how Davis got her to go with him? How come that never worked on you love?"

"I'm starting to wonder if Fleur wasn't the one who asked him out," Lily shrugged, ignoring the second part as he knew full well why she hadn't been endeared by that.

quickly snapped to attention and agreed at once, mimicking her table slap.

"Such riveting conversation, how does he do it," Sirius grumbled.

At the other end of the hall Harry spotted Hagrid

"There's something fun to think about," James smiled again. "Bet he's counting down the minutes until Maxime doesn't have to be up there anymore."

wearing an old ugly suit while gazing at the top. Maxime caught his staring and gave a wave back to him.

"Aw, now there's a romance which'll surely bloom tonight," Lily giggled.

"About the only one it seems," Remus snickered.

Hermione was now trying to teach Krum to say her name properly, he kept mispronouncing it as Hermy-own.

"Those accents can cause some interesting variations," James agreed with chipper. "Once met a Spaniard fellow who called me J'ames all day no matter how many times I corrected him."

She pronounced each syllable of her name clearly, Her-my-oh-nee.**

He tried mimicking it back, but it came out as Herm-own-ninny.

She passed that as close enough, while meeting Harry's eyes with a grin.

"It's not like Hermione to settle," Sirius grinned, "I'll bet she'd never have let Ron get away with that."

"Trust me, she didn't" Harry smirked, "Ron once tried to shorten her name and she ignored him for three hours. I'm sure it would have been longer, but he actually apologized for it."

After all of the food had been consumed and taken away, Dumbledore took to his feet and used his wand to make a stage appear, along with a full set of instruments, including a bagpipe. Moments later, the band the Weird Sisters came in, all wearing hairy suites and ripped clothing.

"Well this sounds like fun," Sirius grinned, "I particularly want to hear which one plays the bagpipes."

They picked up their instruments, and Harry had been so busy watching he'd almost forgotten his part to play

"Least you weren't dwelling on it," Remus chuckled.

until Parvati caught his attention by hauling him to his feet and dragging him to the dance floor while Harry tripped over his robes.

Harry groaned, knowing that was probably just the start to his night.

"Relax Harry," James tried to sooth, "at least it won't get so bad as your Valentine."

Harry did not look soothed.

The band began a nice slow song as Harry tried avoiding all eyes from those such as Dean and Seamus,

"Why don't you hang out with them more," Sirius snickered as he watched Harry's miserable face. "They sound like they know how to have a laugh."

Harry was too busy ignoring him to answer the rhetorical question.

while being steered around by Parvati, who had his hand like a vice.

"Guess I don't need to ask who's steering," Lily grinned.

It wasn't as bad as it could have been while revolving slowly on the spot, his eyes kept going in every direction to avoid any one person watching him, and soon they were joined on the dance floor by other couples so the champions weren't alone.

Harry could already feel himself relaxing again, at least that hadn't been as excruciating or long as he'd been dreading.

The others were honestly happy for him. Despite their teasing, it was good to see something just mildly normal like Harry having to dance for a few moments without anything memorable at all happening.

Ginny and Neville were close by, Ginny wincing frequently as Neville troded on her feet,

That spiked Harry's interest, not anything bad against Neville really, but just thinking to himself that if he'd cut in he knew he'd have tried his hardest not to be stepping on her feet as well. Then his mind fritzed, and he wasn't even sure what he'd been thinking anymore.

and Dumbledore was waltzing with Madame Maxime.

"I'll bet Hagrid was taking notes," Remus muttered.

Dumbledore was much shorter than her, not even reaching her chin, but the two moved with grace as they moved through the crowd. Mad-Eye and Sinistera were doing an odd two step, the latter doing her best to avoid that wooden leg.

Lily couldn't stop several spurts of giggles at all of these lovely mental images Harry kept catching, her wish still holding that she was going to go up to school and beg them to have more events like this.

Moody complemented Harry's socks as they passed, his magical eye at the hem of Harry's robes.

Sirius looked rather disturbed as he read that part, grumbling, "why is he looking?"

"I'm just impressed you kept those on all day," James snorted.

Harry gave an honest grin back as he agreed they were a present from his house-elf friend Dobby.

Harry rolled his eyes at all of their chuckling, ignoring that pestering feeling telling him he should have kept that to himself.

Parvati whispered to Harry as they twirled farther away how creepy Moody was, that eye shouldn't be allowed.

"And I agree," Lily murmured with a slight shake. It didn't matter he was a teacher, that thing felt like too much of an invasion of privacy.

Harry didn't respond as the finale note of the song played, and he let go of Parvati at once.

"Well don't enjoy the moment or anything," Remus snorted.

He offered to go sit back down even as she protested she really liked this next song, but Harry quickly fibbed and said he didn't as he dragged her away. The next number was far more upbeat, and they had to skirt around Fred and Angelina who were using such wild moves, many people had to steer clear in fear of injury.

"There's the best way to do it," James declared with only a fond roll of the eyes from his wife.

Harry quickly found Ron who was openly glaring at Hermione and Krum still on the floor. Padma was still beside him, but none too pleased about it as she kept giving him disgusted looks for still ignoring her.

"You know, sometimes I don't think we give Trelawny enough credit," Sirius mused as he grinned down at the page.

He received nothing but blank stares from his friends, so Sirius shrugged and properly explained, "remember back in her first class, when she made the comment Ron would do something to Parvati. I think she got the wrong twin is all."

"Why do you remember that?" Remus demanded as he usually phased anything that fortune teller said right out of his mind.

Sirius' smile wasn't as easy going as before as he stated, "what can I say, she's had an impact on me," before going on loudly.

Parvati sat down on Harry's other side, but moments later a Beauxbatons boy came up and asked her for a dance. She asked Harry if he'd mind, but he hardly noticed the question, his eyes had found Cho and Cedric.

Lily gave a sad little chuckle at that, stating, "oh yes, he's simply going green with worry."

Harry wasn't paying her much more mind than he'd given his date, he was still trying to count down the pages until this stupid night was over.

Parvati snapped at him to just forget it, stalking off with the other boy.

Hermione came over moments later, collapsing into her seat and fanning her face as she exclaimed how hot it was,

"Only for those not sulking," James pointed out.

"I wasn't sulking," Harry huffed back, "I was just-" he cut himself off and winced as he realized he didn't exactly have a word for what he was doing.

and that Viktor had gone to get them drinks.

Ron was not any more pleased to have her nearby, demanding of her if her date had asked her to call him Vicky yet?

"If he's already asking for nicknames on the first date, I think she'd have a clinger," Sirius stated.

"You know Ron's just being a prat," Remus scolded him, "now would you stop trying to give us dating advice and move on."

Sirius stuck his tongue out at him first before doing so.

Hermione looked shocked at his tone, asking what his problem was?

Ron snapped back if she didn't know, he wasn't going to say.

Lily had to press her hand firmly to her mouth to stop a storm of titters, she couldn't believe Ron had just said that with a straight face, a straight up girl line.

Hermione stared at him, then at Harry, who shrugged.

"Either you're being oblivious, or staying out of it," James patted Harry's shoulder, "either way, I commend you."

Harry was shaking his head slowly, neither confirming or denying either option.

She tried to ask Ron again, but he exploded at her how she was here with a Durmstrang! He was the competition, he- he cut himself off as he tried to find words for Hermione's crime, before concluding that she was fraternizing with the enemy!

"Melodramatic much," Lily sighed.

"Well he's not wrong," James shrugged, though winced when his wife gave him a nasty look for that.

"Well he's not," Sirius defended his mate, and Ron. "I did warn them that something could be going on with the Bulgarian people, and that's who she goes with."

"Don't be stupid," Lily spat, "Ron would be acting like this towards anyone who wasn't him spending time with her right now."

Sirius gave her a calculating look, but wasn't going to argue that back.

She told him he was being an idiot, they weren't enemies. Where was this attitude when he'd arrived,

"There's a difference between enjoying a celebrity around, and mingling with them," James scoffed.

when Ron had wanted his autograph?

"Um, having an autograph is far different than having a date," Sirius frowned like he thought Hermione was being daft.

Ron had a model of him up in his dormitory!

"And?" Remus demanded curiously, "he was a Quidditch nut before this mess started."

"Are you lot really on his side?" Lily scowled at the lot of them. "Hermione hasn't done anything wrong, and Ron's acting like a ponce saying otherwise."

James quickly threw his hands up in surrender, saying "hey, we're just saying Hermione hasn't made a valid point yet, but Ron has."

Lily narrowed her eyes shrewdly at him as she stated, "you know full well Ron's only mad because Hermione's out with anyone but him, when he only realized at the last minute she was an option. He's being a child."

"Well he is a child," Sirius reminded, though quickly went back to reading when Lily looked likely to smack him any second.

Ron ignored all of that by asking when all this had started, up in the library?

Hermione agreed, demanding what of it?

Ron asked if she'd tried to get him on her spew campaign, and she snapped that no, Krum had actually been coming up there for weeks to try and pick up the courage to ask her out.

"Aww," Remus couldn't help but grin, then rolled his eyes at his friends scandalized looks like he seemed to be switching sides. "What," he shrugged, "think back, and every time he was there, he'd see her and Harry working together. It's no wonder he couldn't bring himself to ask with him around. Plus Skeeter's article, and Krum wouldn't know better it wasn't true, I pity the guy."

"Then why did he ask her if he thought she was with Harry?" Lily asked of no one.

"Maybe Hermione will say," Harry quickly tried to pacify before anyone else could strike up another argument, he really didn't want to sit around analyzing his friends love life.

Hermione was getting angrier the longer this kept going while Ron kept at it, pointing out that as Karkaroff's student, he could be doing this just to get at Harry.

Hermione looked like Ron had slapped her.

"It sounds even worse when he says it," Lily groaned for the poor girl. "As if she wasn't pretty enough just to be asked out on a date without having Harry for a friend."

"He didn't mean that at all," James rolled his eyes, "and I know you were thinking the same thing earlier."

"Well can you blame her for thinking Ron meant that," Lily snapped, "after the way he joked about her and Neville days before?"

Sirius was getting rather bored hearing her bicker at them about this, it's not like they'd ever insult Hermione's looks for any reason, and this was just some teenage drama she was working herself up over, so he ignored whatever spluttering comment James tried to make to keep going.

Next time she spoke, her voice was quivering as she stated that for his information, Krum hadn't said a word about Harry!

Ron switched tactics at the speed of light.

"At this point, I'll agree with Lily though," Remus sighed, "Ron's just looking for a fight, doesn't matter the bloke."

That was only one of Lily's points, they seemed to be missing the bigger picture that Ron was being as rude as possible in showing that he was just jealous of the whole instance, but at least they weren't trying to defend Ron from that part.

Pointing out that Krum was instead hoping to get Hermione's help with that egg.

Hermione turned to Harry, insisting he should know that was never the case, she wouldn't help another champion.

Harry hadn't a moment to answer as Ron snapped she had a terrible way of showing it.

"Funny how Harry wasn't the one who got to answer," Sirius snorted.

"I don't really have a problem with who she went with," Harry shrugged, "I found it odd sure, but ah, not like Ron did."

Hermione nearly shouted at him that the whole point of this tournament was foreign wizards making friends!

"Actually no, Hermione's full of it on that one." James shook his head at her.

"If they wanted to set up foreign friends, there are far better ways than tournaments where you're supposed to beat the other school," Remus agreed.

Ron snapped that it was the opposite, winning!

People were really beginning to stare, so Harry tried to sooth Ron that he didn't care who Hermione's date was,

"You'll do anything to avoid attention tonight, won't you?" Sirius raised a brow, thinking that was quite brave of Harry to step in then.

"Hermione was really getting angry at him," Harry winced, "and I'd seen what happens when that got bad, so yeah, I did try."

but Ron ignored Harry too.

"Clearly his goal of defending Harry is the sole topic of this," Remus smiled.

Instead telling Hermione to go back and find Vicky already.

Hermione stormed to her feet and made a quick get away, Ron watching with a rather satisfied face.

"Well at least he enjoyed himself," Sirius sighed with his head cocked to the side, they hadn't exactly resolved anything.

"Honestly, at some point I think Ron enjoys arguing with people," Lily groaned.

Padma inserted herself by asking Ron if he was going to dance with her at all.

"Did she really just ask him that, after all that?" Lily did a double take.

"I honestly have no idea why she bothered," James agreed.

Ron snapped no at her without even looking at her, and Padma snapped right back that was fine, getting up and leaving towards her sister and her new date. They hadn't spoken for a moment when the Beauxbatons boy summoned another friend to him so fast, Harry swore he used a spell.

Causing four collective chuckles at Harry, who always seemed to find a spot of humor after a tense moment.

A new voice asked where Hermione was, the butchering of her name giving it away.

"If he'd just showed up five seconds earlier," Sirius smirked.

"We'd have had an even larger scene," Remus finished for him, though at least he seemed pleased that wasn't what happened.

Krum was holding two butterbeers and looking at them in confusion, but Ron said back waspishly that they had no idea, Krum had simply lost his her.

"Making him think he was ditched," James nodded, "that's kinder than I would have been to him."

"Don't get me started on you," Lily told him with a straight face, "don't think I wasn't well aware of how many times in school you did something much subtler, but with much more force to anyone who asked me out."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," James declared saintly, not even bothering to hide a flashing grin when she kept staring.

Krum was definitely picking his surly attitude back again as he told that if they did see her, to tell that he had drinks before wandering off.

Percy arrived then, congratulating them on making friends with Krum.

"Not the word I'd use," Remus shook his head.

"Sad if Krum had come with anyone else, Ron probably would have used that time to try and properly talk to him," Sirius agreed.

He was rubbing his hands together and looking extremely pompous,

"I swear that's in every description he's ever had," James scoffed.

happily chatting about how that was the point of all this, to make international cooperation.

"Could he have said a worse thing right then," Lily raised a brow at his poor timing.

Harry was not remotely pleased when Percy sat down beside them, and instead went back to looking at the dance floor. Dumbledore and Sprout were having a dance, as were Bagman and McGonagall

"Now there's some potential for fun," Sirius'' brows crept up in surprise and glee.

"Eww," Lily crinkled her nose at him, "glory Sirius, can't two adults ever just enjoy each other's company?"

"Tell me Quidditch fan McGonagall wouldn't at least have been the one to ask star player Bagman for that dance?" James challenged with the same look as Sirius.

She didn't argue the point.

Maxime and Hagrid were cutting a wide path around the dance floor as they waltzed through the students,

"Was waiting for that one," Sirius chuckled.

and Karkaroff was nowhere to be seen.

"Oh that's encouraging," James frowned.

"Lighten up, I'm sure he's not the only one to vacate the moment he wasn't supposed to be there," Remus tried to brush off his own worry.

"I kind of wanted you to keep talking about dancing partners," Sirius pouted, as he loved laughing at the mental images of all his old teachers cutting loose like that.

After that song ended, Bagman gave McGonagall a pleasant kiss on the hand, before making his way out of the crowd. He didn't get far before the twins caught him.

"Probably looking for that sponsorship," Remus chuckled, "they've only got a year left."

"Well they've already made a good impression, so they're off to a great start." Sirius agreed with cheers.

Harry already had his head cocked to the side, something nagging at him about the twins and Bagman again he just knew he should be putting a finger on.

Percy was watching this as well, hissing his displeasure about his brothers accosting a senior Ministry member.

"This little brat never ceases to annoy me," James grumped. "He goes from disliking him to calling him high ranking at the flip of a switch."

"Disliking him doesn't negate his status," Lily defended with a shrug.

They had no respect for anyone.

"It's not like they're mauling him," Remus rolled his eyes, "they're trying to have a chat with him. Percy needs to get a grip."

Bagman shook off Fred and George fairly quickly, however,

"Aw," all five of them pouted, wondering what had Bagman so distracted he wouldn't take time to talk to the twins like he had over the summer. Harry was so distracted by his disappointment for the twins, he completely forgot what he was supposed to be remembering about this.

and came over to Harry's table. Percy quickly apologized for his brothers, but Bagman laughed that off, saying they'd just been asking about some contacts Bagman had promised them regarding Zonkos.

"Oh, well alright then," Sirius agreed festively.

"That was rather short for all that," Remus still had a curious look on his face, "you think they've been corresponding outside of just talking?"

Harry jolted when he heard that, now positive that was exactly what he'd been trying to think up earlier, though for some reason he was sure it was more one sided...

James had noticed Harry, but rather than trying to force him to say something instead said, "I'm sure that's it, the twins aren't the shy type and it's smart of them to be setting this up as early as possible."

Percy did not look pleased at the news, and Harry had the feeling he'd be reporting that to their mother.

"Oh that bleeding killjoy," Lily groaned. "What good would it do? The twins are allowed to have their own life."

"See, we can agree on some things," James told her lovingly.

Bagman was looking at Harry and clearly trying to change the subject before Percy could keep going, but Percy got their first by saying how pleased he was with how this tournament had been going. His department had been more than satisfied with the results, excluding that little hitch of course, his eyes flickering to Harry,

"Hitch?" Lily said sharply.

"I called it far more than that," James muttered with mutiny.

had been a tad unfortunate,

"Unfortunate," Remus agreed with an ugly taste in his mouth.

but ever since things had been smooth sailing.

Bagman agreed it was all in good fun,

"Fun?" Sirius snapped, "Merlin, can't these two pull their heads out of their arses already, Harry's right there and he'd never say anything so mild about this mess."

Harry certainly agreed with Sirius, but he wasn't going to go correcting someone like Bagman either, and he'd long since grown used to just ignoring whatever Percy said.

then asked about Crouch? Percy at once kept up his happy little spiel about all the work Crouch was leaving for him to do, including a conference he had with some Transylvanians-

Ron whispered into Harry's ear for them to get out of there while they could.

Lily was the only one who looked remotely upset at this, in fact the boys looked relieved. Lily enjoyed hearing about these types of international affairs though, it would have been a nice change of topic from the constant problems revolving Harry, but recognized she wasn't going to get a say in the matter.

Harry quickly agreed as the two slipped away and went out to the entrance hall.

"I'd almost feel bad for Bagman getting stuck with that," Sirius snorted.

"If he hadn't been such a prat to Harry so far," James finished in agreement.

Lily actually felt bad for Percy, as she had no doubts that Bagman would slip away sooner rather than later, and apparently Percy hadn't brought his own date like his girlfriend to chat with. He was clearly looking for someone to talk to.

They instead began traipsing the grounds, the low hedges taking on height the farther in they went. They hadn't gone too far when they heard an unpleasantly familiar voice,

"Well this can't be good," Remus sighed, as that had yet to start them on a pleasant conversation.

saying how there was nothing for Igor to be fussing about.

Karkaroff's voice returned very hushed and anxious as he told Severus there was nothing to be pretending about,

"Well you're doing a terrible job of it, talking out in the open grounds," Harry muttered to himself, then looked around in surprise at all of the suddenly pale faces. Clearly he was missing something, but before he could ask his mother hissed, "no. He swore he'd never go through with that! I, those were rumors, he-" she spluttered herself off with pure indignation.

The Marauders had equally ugly looks on their faces, and it didn't take much for Harry to piece it all together. Karkaroff was a confirmed Death Eater as far as Sirius was concerned, and that was proof enough for them. Now he was going around talking to Snape about something, clearly something bad. Karkaroff was talking to someone he trusted, a fellow Death Eater. Was that presumptuous though? Harry didn't think so, something deep inside him was far to settled on the notion already. Harry hated Snape of course, but even he was mildly surprised to hear that he really had gone and joined Voldemort's crew. That is of course, if he was understanding this right, because would Dumbledore really higher a Death Eater?

This small bit had been more than proof enough for everyone else without any other type of confirmation.

"I can not believe how disgusted I am by this," Sirius snarled, his eyes going darker by the second as he stared at the pages. "After everything, I really am insulted at myself for how surprised I am we were right all along, he is a Death Eater."

"Was," Remus corrected half heartedly, he had a look on his own face that spoke volumes of how tired he already was on hearing about this.

"Excuse you," James snapped, "once one always one!" His face had flushed an ugly color in shock as he glared down Remus; who quickly cast his mind around and realized another Death Eater James' mind would have landed on, and so quickly explained himself;

"Oh come now, you really think Dumbledore would higher him if he hadn't reformed in some way? I doubt he ever got far past initiation, he and Karkaroff were probably brought in at the same time, but Karkaroff was caught and probably has no idea what Snape did to convince Dumbledore he wasn't a Death Eater anymore. Merlin, we don't even know what possessed Dumbledore to hire this guy, though I still bitterly hate whatever that is." He had in no way implied that he'd ever forgive and forget Snape of anything he'd been doing to Harry so far, let alone any person who'd ever helped Voldemort, and that meant anyone.

Lily's lips were still trembling to much to add in, though in hate or regret none of them were really sure. She may have long since renounced him as her friend, but had only recently truly begun hating him for the way he'd been treating her son, Sirius, and Remus. They had no real clue how this news was affecting her, and though James ached desperately to ask her, he wasn't entirely sure if he would like the response he'd get. What if she tried to defend him? Remus was only trying to vouch for Dumbledore, and that was nothing new even if it did irk him a lot more than ever before, but at least Dumbledore was still worth it on some level. He'd still be given a chance to defend himself. If Lily really tried to justify Snape to him though...

Sirius was watching her like a bomb fixing to go off, and finally the silence had rung for so long it seemed to register in her. She spoke very slowly and clearly, enunciating each word, "I am going to murder him the next time I have the pleasure, but please don't stop on my account. I want to hear what has Karkaroff in such a tizzy, it could only make my day better."

James unbelievably relaxed, but really, some things never died, he was just thankful Lily and Severus' friendship had been one of them that had.

this had been growing clearer for months, it was a serious problem!

Sirius couldn't help a violent snort of laughter at Karkaroff's choice of words, happily opening his mouth to make a crack before Lily interjected in honeyed tones, "If you actually start mocking this situation right now, I swear I will make your innards your outers. Are you really going to sit there and laugh about two Death Eaters prowling around school?"

Thoroughly chastised, Sirius still couldn't help a petulant little scowl at her for ruining his fun, but wasn't going to deny either he had something more pressing to be reading.

Snape's curt reply was to tell Igor to flee, Snape would explain his absence, but he was staying right here.

They rounded the corner then, both with ill- tempered faces. As they passed one bush, a pair of students came tumbling out, and Snape took off ten points from both the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff students who'd been caught.

James muttered something under his breath about Snape being the opposite of cupid or something, but Harry didn't want to ask for details.

Then they caught sight of him and Ron, and Snape demanded what they were doing?

Ron snapped back they were walking, asking if that was a crime now?

"Never let Ron change that snappy tone," Remus stated mildly.

Snape snapped at them to keep walking then, before he did so himself with Karkaroff hot on his heels.

Ron asked what had them so worried?

"Nothing good," Sirius ground out.

Lily couldn't help but suddenly get the jitters, her mind unhelpfully flickering through all that had happened to Harry this year, and how they were suspecting Karkaroff had something to do with it. It was the last thing she ever wanted to hear that now Karkaroff had back up with Snape. And yet, her mind kept nagging at something, how Snape had tried to protect Harry in his first year, stopped Quirrell getting the Stone. There was no longer any real if in her mind, Snape had really turned in with all his real friends at school, but then why hadn't Quirrell come to Snape for help back then? Why, in fact, had Snape tried to stop Voldemort through Quirrell? It wasn't adding up, but it didn't really change anything inside her either. Even if she ever did get an explanation for him, she knew it would never be good enough, not after he'd gone and smashed every last promise to her for the last time. Sev was gone.

Harry asked his own question, since when were he and Karkaroff on first name terms?

Remus gave Harry a kind smile, at least he seemed to understand what was happening now, and he hadn't even asked, he'd pieced it all together himself. There was no trace of outward confusion in him to show he needed an answer. It only let Remus' mind to keep wandering though, to try and figure out what exactly did Karkaroff have to be so upset about? What was becoming clearer? All he could really think up was the Voldemort mentionings, and how they were all growing more and more terrified that he was trying to make a comeback with the help of the rat. Was it possible Karkaroff was hearing that news, and that's what he was referring to? Why would he be afraid of that though?

They had reached a large stone reindeer now,

Sirius muttered something under his breath regretfully, wanting to make a crack at Prongs, but worried Lily would snap at him again. The bleeding Death Eaters were gone, that part was over, could they please get back to talking about something more pleasant.

with only one path leading off. In the shadows was a stone bench, where Hagrid's husky voice could be heard telling that he'd known from the moment he saw her.

"Oh please go back to listening in on Death Eaters," James groaned, though honestly he was more than happy to give a slight laugh. "I do not want to sit in on Hagrid's love fest."

"Turn around Harry, please tell me you run off from this," Remus agreed.

Harry gave them an absent smile, now worried that he really had walked in on something unpleasant he wasn't going to like.

The boys froze, knowing right away this wasn't something they should be hearing.

"Now what gave you that idea?" Sirius rolled his eyes, pleasantly amused when Lily did nothing more than usual to his commentary again.

Harry looked around for another way to go, and spotted Fleur and Roger half off the path. He pointed this out to Ron as a way to go, Fleur and Roger were certainly busy enough not to notice them,

It was unbelievable that they could actually start laughing again, but Harry's mostly disgusted half intrigued look as he recalled looking at that certainly did it for the lot of them. Most students in the higher grades at least tried to hide these acts, so this was most likely Harry's first time ever watching someone make out, and it was certainly a more priceless and treasured moment than finding out something about Snape, so they were most definitely in at least a good mood again.

but Ron's eyes flipped wide in horror at the sight of Fleur, and he instead pulled Harry deeper into the shadows of the statue.

"Can't even blame him," Sirius said animatedly, "as he was probably hoping that was him a week ago."

"Moving on," Lily told him, "before you put more images into my head I never want."

Maxime's voice responded to Hagrid with a purr, asking what he'd known?

"No, really though Harry, you can still find another way to leave," Remus pleaded without a trace of hope.

Harry sighed with a miserable look at the ceiling, really wishing the more that was spoken he'd done just that.

Harry knew he didn't want to be hearing this, and wished he could stuff his fingers in his ears and start humming loudly, but that wasn't an option.

"I think it's better than the alternative," James shook his head sadly.

"And be found," Sirius corrected James, "no, best wait until they get ah, too distracted as well, and slip away, never mentioning this again."

"There you go again," Lily groaned, "could you not have edited that a bit so I didn't have to picture that!"

Sirius did not look remorseful in the slightest, he enjoyed the agitation it caused Lily too much.

Instead Harry tried to concentrate on a beetle he found crawling on the reindeer,

Harry frowned all of a sudden, some new feeling wanting to rear up and remind him of something other than embarrassment for listening in on this...

but the insect wasn't interesting enough to drown out Hagrid saying how he'd known Maxime was like him, asking if she'd gotten it from her mother or father?

"Oh," James' embarrassment quickly flickered to surprise as he stated, "well this isn't nearly as bad as declaring his undying love."

"Guess they would have been talking long enough by now Hagrid would be curious," Lily agreed.

Maxime tried to play him off, saying she had no idea what Hagrid meant.

"Excusez-moi?" Remus tried, and failed, at a french accent. "If she isn't a half giant like Hagrid than I'm a fish."

"And as you most certainly do not turn into a mermaid once a month," Sirius agreed with a straight face, "I'm inclined to agree."

Hagrid ignored that and happily kept babbling about how he'd gotten it from his Mum's side, she'd been one of the last left in Britain.

"Ooh," Lily couldn't help but sigh softly. This may not be the romance that Harry shouldn't have been listening in on, but it certainly was private enough she still wished more than anything Harry had scarpered. If Hagrid had wanted him to know this, he'd have told him already.

Admitting he didn't remember her that well, she'd left when he was three, but of course she wasn't the maternal sort. It just wasn't in their natures really, and he had no idea where she was now, could be dead for all he knew.

The boys were frowning with some genuine pity as well now. They'd never really thought about it to be honest, but Hagrid was quite right, giants were not maternal of any kind, they had their brood and then left them to fend for themselves. The strongest survived, and Hagrid was the farthest thing from a fully grown giant. That's why he was such an oddity at all, what giantess had fallen for a human to have Hagrid? None of them had ever questioned it to deeply, and they were truly sad to be thinking on it now.

Maxime didn't say anything, and Harry, in spite of himself, took his eyes off the beetle

Harry was certainly distracted enough by Hagrid as well to not even give that thing a second thought anymore, why would he?

and looked over the antlers with interest, he'd never heard Hagrid talk about his childhood before.

He certainly was now as he kept going by explaining his dad had raised him, and he'd been such a tiny thing. By the time Hagrid was six, he could place his dad on a dresser, making them both laugh at the time. Maxime had gone stiff and didn't seem to be responding anymore.

"Don't exactly know how you're supposed to respond to that," James shook his head, the urge to laugh was there at such a thing, but it was certainly sad enough to be kept at bay.

Hagrid didn't seem to notice as he told how his dad had taken care of him until Hagrid started school, but he'd passed very soon afterwards and Hagrid was left to himself.

Remus gave a genuine wince of empathy for that, wondering if it was the curse of all beasts that the parents suffered first. His own hadn't lived long enough to see him through school either.

Dumbledore had been a help to him after that, always kind to him.

"More than makes you understand his loyalty to him," Sirius sighed.

Hagrid blew his nose on his handkerchief then, trying to turn the conversation back on Maxime by asking about her?

Maxime's tone had changed as she stated how chilly it was,

Lily cocked her head to the side in confusion, but that still didn't hide the tense set of her shoulders. She wasn't really...

but the weather was nothing to her now icy tones.

"Oh she's not," James began scowling at once.

She stated she was leaving,

"She's bloody well trying," Sirius growled. She was actually trying to run out on Hagrid, after he'd just told her something like that. She really couldn't give him a moment of sympathy? What was wrong with her?

but Hagrid tried to call her back, saying he'd never met another one before.

Maxime demanded outright, another what?

"Does he need to spell it out for you," Lily's tone was as brittle as it could go. "Why is she being so stupid about it."

"Maybe she's never had to say it out loud before," Remus muttered to himself, he certainly remembered the first time he'd had to admit it to another person, but then again, it wasn't particularly the same. Maxime was being horrid to Hagrid, when he was trying to help. Maxime wasn't a real monster, she just happened to have a different kind of parentage.

Lily gave him a look for that comment, but the others hadn't heard, and Sirius was too outraged on Hagrid's behalf to notice and had kept reading loudly.

Harry wished he could have told Hagrid against saying what he did next, but Hagrid did indeed state another half giant of course.

Maxime shrieked in outrage.

"How dare he?" Lily snapped right back, her every visage saying she'd go toe to toe with Maxime right now no matter the height difference. "What is she playing at treating him like that when he's talking to her. How does she not understand that if anyone could sympathize with her, it's Hagrid!"

Her voice was such that it even drew the attention of Fleur and Roger, making them fall out of their bush.

James sighed, wishing for a moment where he could laugh at that proper, now he was all in a knot about Hagrid. This Yule Ball was turning out as big a mess as the stupid tasks it was so emotionally all over.

Maxime was still speaking in outrage how she'd never been more insulted, she was nothing of the sort! She just had big bones!

"She did not, just manage to say that," Sirius snapped in disgust. "Dumbledore has big bones, Runcorn had big bones! She has giant bones!"

"It's like Petunia had a bad influence on her as well," James agreed with a sneer.

She stormed away, stamping through bushes in her anger. Hagrid watched her go.

Lily made a deep throated noise, whether of hurt for Hagrid like she wanted to go to him and comfort him at once, or go after Maxime and hunt her down for treating her friend like that, nobody was certain, but both were likely.

It was too dark to see his face, but moments later, he got up as well and trudged back to his cabin.

"Poor Hagrid," James groaned for him. "Does it feel like he's had to deal with crap every year, the poor guy needs a break."

"He definitely didn't deserve this one," Sirius nodded.

Harry was at least happy they could finally get out of there and tried to get Ron to come along, but Ron didn't move.

Lily's temper looked about ready to pop on Ron, she'd had more than enough of him lately, but Remus quickly soothed before she could get started, "he had a bad reaction to me when he first found out as well. Don't go yelling at him for something he's processing."

"It's not like it's hard to work out," Sirius grumbled with an ugly look in place, he didn't much appreciate Ron having any reaction other than anger towards Maxime like the rest of them.

"To us it wasn't," Remus agreed, trying, and failing, to keep shame from his face as he stuttered out, "because we, well we ah, had more of an um, practice of-"

"We went out and hung around with someone most people wouldn't put together had a secret," James finished bluntly. "So we had a knack for guessing when others did. It is true most would first think it was some sort of magical accident that would make Hagrid like that unless they spotted the clues we did."

Sirius rolled his eyes at them, but then remembered Lily hadn't even guessed as much until they'd told her as well, so decided against arguing further.

Harry asked what his problem was, and Ron looked astounded at Harry with a very serious expression.

"Why do you keep describing everyone as looking like me?" Sirius asked of Harry quickly, just looking for anything to laugh at again. "You miss me that much pup, you're seeing me everywhere?"

Harry did indeed laugh at that joke and still didn't seem ready to be growing tired of it anytime soon much to Sirius' pleasure.

Ron asked if Harry had known about Hagrid being half giant, and Harry said he hadn't, but then asked so what?

Ron's face at once showed Harry's ignorance of the wizarding world.

"An ignorance that I'm quite happy you have," Lily sighed.

"Had," James corrected with a frown.

Harry gave them quizzical looks, but didn't bother asking as he knew he'd be asking Ron what the big deal was. Clearly he'd had it wrong before, if ever he did think about giants he thought they were all like Hagrid, nobody had ever said anything otherwise.

Brought up by Muggles, there were many times where something should have struck Harry differently in the wizarding world, and apparently finding out your friend was a half giant and the reaction being so what, was one of them; this was not a common reaction of most wizards.

"I want to emphasize that most though," James shook his head sadly. "You know Hagrid for more than five minutes, and nobody should care a lick."

Remus was sitting very far back in his seat, keeping the baby very close to him and avoiding all eyes so that he could be left out of this as long as possible, but he had no doubts his friends would circle back to him on this very soon if this lead where he was thinking it would. They were going to turn on him and remind him that Hagrid being at Hogwarts was as natural as Remus being there, something he still vividly disagreed with.

Ron told Harry he'd explain inside,

"Can't blame him for that though," Lily agreed, "those gardens have already proved the ease of eavesdropping."

leading the way back inside. Fleur and Roger had disappeared again, most likely to a more private clump of bushes,

"Thank you for acknowledging that Harry," James tried for a smirk again, at least that had brought back some fun memories from his seventh year, not that he had plans on sharing that.

and Harry and Ron went back inside the castle.

He caught sight of Parvati and Padma having a grand time with their new Beauxbatons dates, and Hermione dancing with Krum again.

"Ron's clearly just having the night of his life with all these girls," Remus chuckled to himself.

Harry and Ron chose seats as far away from everyone as possible as Harry asked what the deal with giants was?

Ron struggled to explain that they were, well not nice.

"Yeah," Remus rolled his eyes at such articulation, "and werewolves are just kind of unpleasant sometimes."

"You certainly are when you get snappy," Sirius scowled at him, his look more calculating than anything as he tried to guess if Remus was genuinely trying at a joke, or making a crack at himself, a very big difference in Sirius' opinion.

Remus met his eyes but wasn't giving anything away, saving himself from a lecture as he should have known better when he did the latter.

Harry asked why anyone would care, there was nothing wrong with Hagrid.

Ron quickly agreed, but it did explain why he never spoke about it. Ron had always thought he'd just had a bad encounter with an Engorgement Charm.

"I've heard worse ideas," James smiled without humor. Those ideas were usually helped along by the Marauders though, who even having guessed Hagrid's secret, had said no more about it than Remus'. It was his business after all.

Harry still asked what the deal with Hagrid was?

Ron tried to explain how dangerous giants were, they were vicious things that just liked to kill. Thankfully there weren't any left in Britain though.

Harry asked what happened to them, and Ron first said it was the Aurors who had killed most of them off,

Harry's mind boggled at the idea, still unable to grasp how big a 'real' giant even was, and how you could go about killing that. The dragon had seemed nearly invincible, and a true giant seemed to be at least the size of them.

but honestly, they enjoyed killing each other just as much.

Harry switched to talking about Maxime, saying she was kidding herself.

"Least you're grasping the important parts of this," Lily sighed.

Said woman was now at the judges table again, alone, looking miserable.

"Deserves it," three of them muttered, no sympathy at all for the way she'd given Hagrid hell.

Only Remus felt a wince for her, knowing full well how it could feel to have that kind of thing shoved in your face by someone. When his friends had done it to him, he'd tried running for his life, but they'd come after him. Hagrid and Maxime were slightly different, but at least Remus could understand both parts.

Harry pointed out that if Hagrid was a half-giant, she certainly was. Big bones, please, the only thing with bigger bones was a dinosaur.

At least James and Sirius full blown laughed at that, James praising, "thank you Harry for that lovely comparison."

Harry and Ron spent the rest of the ball discussing giants in their corner,

"I can just tell how riveted you are by this whole ordeal," Lily shook her head at him fondly.

"I never wanted to go in the first place," Harry reminded with a frown. "The part about the giants from Ron was the most interesting bit of the night."

"Wonder how different you'd feel if you had gone with Cho?" Sirius demanded with a knowing smile, genuinely wondering if it wouldn't have turned into his pup and her hiding in bushes, but Harry stoutly ignored him again.

while Harry tried his best not to watch Cho and Cedric,

Then Harry groaned and had to fight the urge to chuck that book in the fireplace already, it just had to keep mentioning that!

"Don't get too down Harry," James comforted, "I'm positive you'll get another shot at her."

"Or find someone better," Sirius offered.

Harry finally caved and flicked his godfather in the ear mildly. It wasn't the full blown smack they'd all been expecting when Sirius' picking had finally worn Harry's last nerve, but it was certainly enough to have them all laughing.

it gave him a strong desire to kick something.

"Least he didn't act on that urge," Remus chuckled with an obvious look at Sirius.

Sirius absently scooted just a bit more away from a Harry with a not so subtle smirk.

When the Weird Sisters had played their final song, the whole hall rang with applause while they filed back to the entrance hall.

"I'm guessing you didn't find a new favorite band tonight as well?" Lily asked.

"Nah, nothing more special than I've heard on Muggle radios," Harry shrugged, he'd never found any real interest in music and this night certainly hadn't fixed that.

Most of the passing people were expressing wishes how it had gone on longer, but Harry was not in the same boat.

"Yeah, can't blame you for that," Sirius shook his head in agreement.

Harry and Ron saw Hermione and Krum saying their goodnights. She gave Ron a blistering look as they passed.

"Because I really missed hearing about those two arguing," Lily groaned in anticipation for when this silence broke, neither of them were very good at holding back.

Harry and Ron were headed for the stairs when Cedric called Harry back.

"What, did he come to rub it in or something?" James scowled.

"I don't think so," Lily was frowning as well, though more lightly. "I honestly don't really think he'd even know about Harry's crush, he's hardly flamboyant about it as you love."

James looked nullified, but Sirius' interest was still piqued as he kept going.

Harry could see Cho waiting for him in the entrance hall below.

"That kicking urge coming back yet?" Remus asked pleasantly, "I'm sure you can still find someone in here who deserves it."

"Thank you Moony," Sirius told him with a straight face, "you're ever lasting defense for me always leaves me feeling safe and loved."

"Shove it and keep going," James snorted at the pair of them.

Harry responded back coldly, but Cedric didn't seem to want to speak with Ron there.

"Don't know why?" Lily said in surprise, "Harry'll just tell him later anyways."

"Guess Cedric wants to leave that up to me," Harry shrugged with a still rather foul temper.

Ron left, and Cedric lowered his voice so as not to be overheard as he told Harry for repayment about the dragon, he asked Harry if his egg wailed when he opened it?

"I'd be more surprised if all the eggs did something different," Remus stated.

"It would have been a little more interesting though," Lily shrugged, "after all, if it's all the same puzzle, the champions could feasibly work it out together."

"Clearly that's not the case though," James pointed out before the two could keep going.

When Harry agreed, Cedric told him to take a bath.

"Err, was that supposed to be an insult?" James cocked his head to the side as he tried to decide if he should be getting mad.

"I, don't think so," Lily frowned slowly, "and as he did say he was trying to return a favor, a clue then."

"To take a bath?" Sirius raised a brow, "does soap and water magically fix his egg?"

"Maybe," James agreed thoughtfully, "Like, it's broken or something, and cleaning it will, I don't know, fix it to make the proper noise."

"That's a pretty cheap return," Remus sniffed, "Harry didn't say go poke around the forest and figure it out."

"So he didn't come right out and say it. He's making him work for it," Lily shrugged, "at least he's making an attempt, not everyone would have even done that."

The boys were all still too mad at Cedric for one upping Harry on this particular night to feel real gratitude yet.

Harry did not get it. Cedric repeated for him to take a bath, and take the egg, and ah, mull things over. It'll help.

"This is getting weirder and weirder," Sirius' frown deepened. "He's not even saying to clean the egg, Merlin I don't even know what he's trying to say."

"Have I mentioned how much I dislike him lately," James grumbled, "enough with the riddles man, Harry gets more than enough of that."

Harry may full heartedly agree with his dad, and thanked him for the defense, but was internally telling his gut to shut up and stop wringing itself anytime someone said a bad word about Cedric.

Harry could not think of a reply to that as Cedric tacked on that Harry could even use the prefects bathroom. Telling him exactly where it was on the fifth floor,

Remus let out a surprised little chuckle though, stating, "okay, that right there was his repayment for the dragon. You're going to love that place, best bathroom in the castle."

It took Harry a moment to get past how odd Cedric's comment was to look back at Remus and ask, "you've been in there?"

"I certainly preferred it to sharing with these loons," Remus agreed, "whoever's the worst in your year about hogging the shower, Sirius beats them."

Sirius happily stuck his tongue out at him, running his hand through his hair with great importance as he stated, "I have a higher standard to hold than your grungy arse, had to keep all the attention off of you and my looks were the easiest way by far."

"You suffer so much for me," Remus told him deadpan.

Harry was going to ask how Remus even knew how to get in, but then decided that was a stupid question, as clearly the Marauders had yet to come across any room in the castle they didn't know about.

and even the password to get in. Then he bid Harry goodnight as he went back to Cho.

Lily shook her head as she realized these boys picking at each other had actually managed to distract her, but now the curiosity was right back on what on earth Cedric was up to with that odd insert of his. She did certainly agree with Remus though, if Harry never made prefect, he should get in there when he had the chance, it was more than worth it.

Harry walked back to Gryffindor Tower alone. That had been extremely strange advice.

"That about covered it, yeah," James muttered.

Why would taking a bath help anything? Was Cedric having a go at him?

"Well I would hope not," Sirius snapped at once. "Some payback for what you did for him."

"Doesn't seem his type," Lily shook her head, "no, he was trying to help Harry in his own way, I'm sure of it."

Was he trying to make Harry look like a fool, so Cho would like him even more by comparison?

Remus opened, then closed his mouth, quickly stalling his comment about how Cedric didn't need to do that, he clearly already had Cho's affection. He cared about Harry of course, but he wasn't quite sure how Harry would take Remus making joking comments like that like he would towards Sirius or James.

Sirius had no such qualms and blurted out, "nah, you clearly cover that all on your own Harry, I'm positive Cho's heard all about your lovely Valentine or-"

"What was it you were telling me about some ceiling incident Mum?" Harry spoke over Sirius with a challenging look, "I don't think I quite got that story."

"Read, quick keep going," James hissed and Sirius made quick work of doing so over a smirking Harry.

Remus was watching with self annoyance, he always hated how whenever his werewolf status was brought up he fell back on being a self conscious idiot. Of course Harry wouldn't have cared, he'd already been making and receiving plenty of jokes.

Harry had to wake up an extremely hungover Fat Lady to get inside past her irritation at being woken up.

"Well that's her fault," Lily chuckled much to Sirius' red faced horror, though he relaxed slightly when he realized Lily wasn't saying what he'd been afraid of. "As a house portrait, she really should know better."

She still had a knowing look in her eye that told both boys quite clearly she was fully prepared to give that story to Harry the next time he asked, so neither of them wanted to linger.

He climbed into the common room and found Ron and Hermione having a blazing row.

"Well that's always nice to walk in on," Remus said in only mild surprise, this had only come a little faster than expected after all.

"Here's hoping it doesn't turn into another no speaking one," Lily groaned. She was in fact hoping for the opposite, maybe Ron would finally admit what was bothering him all night, if not to Hermione, than at least to himself so that this could go a bit smoother.

Standing as far apart as they could, Hermione was shouting at him that if he didn't like her choice of dates, she had a solution for him!

Ron demanded what that could be just as loudly, and she screamed back that next time there was a ball, to ask her first, and not as a last resort!

James sucked in air through his teeth, before nodding and saying, "okay, Hermione wins that one."

"No arguments here," Sirius agreed.

Ron mouthed wordlessly as she turned to leave. Ron looked back at Harry, still struggling for speech as he tried to say she'd completely missed his point.

"Ah, no dear," Lily corrected, "I do believe that's you."

"How long do you think it'll take him to catch on?" Remus asked with honest curiosity.

"Hopefully sooner rather than later," James chuckled.

Harry was simply frowning at the lot of them, perfectly clear what they were talking about, but still somehow knowing that nothing really came of this for a few more years to come, something he was honestly quite grateful for.

Harry did not respond, he liked talking to Ron again to much to speak his mind,

"Which is?" Sirius prompted when Harry still hesitated, but did indeed admit

"That Ron shouldn't have gone with Padma, but it was sort of too late by then."

"There are worse ways you could have put that," Lily shrugged.

"Though blunt usually works the best," Remus smirked, "so I'm not sure if even that would have gotten through to him."

but he somehow thought that Hermione had gotten the point much better than Ron had.

"I know that's true," Sirius agreed as he gave the book to Harry.

HPHPHPHPHP

*In all honesty, no, I really don't think the Marauders understand the Room of Requirements in the same aptitude that Harry does next year. I think they would have found it more along the line like the twins had, a convenient place to hide at one time or something that they never found again, much like Remus had just joked about. Honestly, I doubt any students really do before the DA through Harry, it seemed more like a house-elf secret before Dobby shared.

**Fun fact, JK only added this moment because a lot of people were apparently mispronouncing her name. I saw the second movie before I got invested in the books, so I have a tendency to pronounce them the way the movies do, Cedric's last name becomes one of the most recurring corrections between me and friends for that.

#Harry Potter #fanfiction #reading the books #GoF #Marauders #Remus Lupin #sirius black #James Potter #Lily Potter

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magicjesuscup · 4 years ago

Note

How would the KoTR react to Gray from Lord El-Melloi Case Files(don’t answer if you haven’t heard or watched)

I got two of these, so I’m going to delete the other one. I'm also going to say this is after they learn about her past and not them reacting to how she looks. I'm doing it this way because there are so many saber faces I don't think they'd have much of a reaction to a girl who just looks like their king anymore.

I also want to note that I think Gray only ever referred to Waver as "Sir" in the subbed version, so I'll be sticking to that in my response.

Another thing to note: I wrote Arthur/Artoria, Lancer Artoria, and Mordred’s reactions a few days before everyone else’s. So, theirs are kinda in the form of mini fanfiction while the rest are headcanons.

SFW and spoilers for the Lord El-Melloi Case Files.

Arthur/Artoria

Oh. Oh god do they feel guilty about this. The whole reason Gray looked the way she did was because her village was trying to resurrect them!? This poor girl never had a life of her own because she was expected to live as someone else. (No, they don't see this as anything similar to what they experienced when they were alive. They chose to be king; Gray was born into this madness.) They fought so hard so people could live their lives; this isn't what they intended.

"I never would have imagined anyone would rob someone of their life to resurrect me. Forgive me."

Gray shook her head and stared at the ground. "It wasn't all bad. I was able to meet Sir, and because I had Add, I could protect him. And I met a lot of people through him too. Some were strange. Some were kind. But they're all important memories for me, and I wouldn't have them if my childhood had been different."

Hearing that made them feel better. If she wasn't sad over things, why should they be? Still, they were a bit worried about what would happen if her village ever caught up to her.

Lancer Artoria

Artoria looked at Gray with all the confidence and dignity befitting a king. "There are several versions of me running around Chaldea. You are not one of them. The things I left undone and have yet to do are my burden to bear, not yours."

Listening to that calm tone and noting her body language, Gray looked at the floor. She was so shy and timid. "I'm really not like you at all."

"No. You are a failed King Arthur." Artoria put her hand under Gray's chin and tiled her head upward. The look in Artoria's eyes was soft and there was a hint of a smile on her face, "But, you are an exemplary Gray." Artoria dropped her hand. "You need but tend to your own affairs, whatever they may be; I shall handle the rest."

"Pft." A voice under Gray's cloak spoke. "Once and future king my foot!" Gray moved her cloak aside revealing the mystic code, who continued, "Two world wars, Brexit, a handful of pandemics-"

"Rhongomyniad." Artoria's voice was full of authority and her tone carried a warning.

The mystic code fell silent. Gray looked in shock from Add to Artoria. Sheepishly she requested, "I know you'd like me to live for myself, but I'd really like to learn how you did that."

Artoria stifled a chuckle. "I'd be honored to teach you."

"H-Hey!" Add protested. "Don't I get a say in this!?"

Artoria's voice immediately slipped back into its normal deadpan. "No."

Bedivere

Good boy Bedivere is kind, but also acts like the butler she never asked for. She doesn't want to make him feel bad by declining his offers to help her, but it's very strange for her to have someone offering to do things for her. She's kinda used to being the one to run errands and do little tasks. So, instead of accepting his offers, she suggests they do the tasks together instead. They get along well. Bedivere is a people person and conversations come easy to him, which is good since that's not one of Gray's strong suits.

Gawain

Word gets to Gawain that Gray is somehow related to King Arthur. He's kind of excited by this because that means she's his kin too. He's very curious how they're related, but is fairly certain he'll never find out. Documents detailing her family tree either probably don't exist or have been long destroyed. He basically appoints himself her big brother. Of course, he realizes very quickly he can't be rough with her like he was with his brothers/sisters raised to be boys (no wrestling and what not). Luckily, he doesn't have much trouble adapting. He tries to be kind and gentle, but it kinda comes off as weird and creepy?

Gawain: If you ever need a hug, Big Brother Gawain is here. *holds out his arms for emphasis, like he's ready for a hug right now.*

Gray: Oh. Thank you. *is 100% not going to hug him, but appreciates the gesture.*

Lancelot

Okay, so Lancelot had has a body guard crush on Artoria, and this girl is not helping. Sure, he's used to seeing other girls that look like his king running around and acting differently but none of them are this cute(!?). Like, every time Gray's around, he pictures Artoria acting like Gray and then starts smiling like a doofus.

Gray: Sir Tristan, is Sir Lancelot alright? He's had that look on his face for five minutes and he doesn't seem to be aware of anything happening around him.

Tristan: Oh, that's just the face he makes when he's thinking about a pretty girl.

Gray: Are you sure?

Tristan: Yes, he does it a lot; you'll get used to it.

Merlin

Merlin is super torn. Gray is the type that gets flustered pretty easily. People like that are super fun for him to tease, but she also looks too much like Artoria. Every time he looks at her, he's reminded of raising the tiny king until she was five and then popping back in her life to train and advise her. Also, what if he says something lewd to her, she deems him a pervert, and then never speaks to him again!? That would be awful. For now, he'll just treat her the same way he does Saber Lily.

Mordred

Mordred put his hands on his hips. "I don't get why you're bothering with that hood. Do you have any idea how many people here look like father? Nero. Joan of Arc. Okita. Bitch, you ain't special." He noticed Gray turning away from him and decided to switch tactics a bit. "I look just like father too; you think I should hide my face?"

Gray stammered out a, "Well, no-"

"Damn straight I shouldn't." He jerked his thumb towards his face. "This mug is mine. I'm not hiding it anymore, and neither should you."

Gray thought about what Mordred said and slowly removed her hood.

Mordred grinned and slapped her hard on the back a few times. "Look who's balls dropped; good job, kid!"

Tristan

Gray follows Tristan around sometimes, but he doesn't mind. Gawain and Lancelot are acting like complete weirdos, so he's guessing she's just grateful to have found a knight that can act like a normal human being. He's also 100% wrong. Gray is fascinated by Tristan's ability to somehow see with his eyes shut. Her working theory is that he has mystic eyes that let him see through his eyelids and they take such a toll on him they cause him to randomly fall asleep throughout the day. She tags along with him waiting to see some evidence (her experiences with Waver have taught her to always look for proof). Also, Gawain and Lancelot know this, but they're not telling him. Can you blame them? He called them weirdos; they're going to enjoy watching him be wrong!

#Arthur Pendragon #Artoria Pendragon #Arturia Pendragon #Lancer Artoria #Lancer Arturia #Bedivere #Gawain #Lancelot #Merlin #Mordred #Tristan #Fate/Grand Order #My Fanfiction #kinda?

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versegm · 4 years ago

Text

Guda takes a look at Artoria, holding so much responsibilities on her shoulders her knees are trembling & she can’t even answer when asked what she likes. They take a look at Saber Lily, so bright and cheerful and full of hope and potential. And then they think “well, time to never analyse how far I’ve gone ever since this whole thing started.”

#fate #fate grand order #fgo #guda #ritsuka fujimaru

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atamascolily · 4 years ago

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Lily liveblogs: “The Rise of Skywalker,” part three

I end as I began: hopelessly confused about what the point of all this was. (Except for money. I got that part loud and clear.)

Rey just leaves Finn behind, because... friendship, right? Jannah does not have a good opinion of Rey right now, and tbh, I can't blame her. I realize Rey is under a lot of stress, but... her behavior since arriving on this "moon of Endor" has been wayyyy out of line.

Also, Poe pulls up with the Falcon right then, so I guess they got it repaired in record time, lol. Convenient.

Meanwhile, at the Resistance Jungle Base, everyone is sad because Leia is dead. I wonder who's in charge now???

"Goodbye, dear princess." Oh, so she's a General right up until she dies, and then it's back to princess again? I wish the ST would make up its mind about her title.

Oh, I guess Poe is, since he showed up and actually has a rank??

Chewie LOSES IT at the news Leia is dead--I feel you, bud. I feel you so hard.

Kylo tries to look dignified as he broods on the wreckage, but he looks awful. Like a drowned rat, with a convenient lightsaber-shaped hole in his tunic where Rey stabbed him. (She didn't even take the saber with her or drop it into the sea or anything! WHHYYYYYYYYYYY - gimme a reason, any reason, even a stupid one.)

And then Han shows up. Is he a ghost? Is this a memory? Is Kylo hallucinating? WHAT WHAT WHAT IS HAPPENING??? (This would have so much more resonance if we had SEEN how Han's death impacted Kylo earlier on instead of that one confused flashback at the beginning of the film....)

grizzled Harrison Ford looks great, why the hell did they kill him off in the first movie whyyyyyy

Okay, so they answer the question and this is a memory, which is fine, I usually love this trope, BUT it would be hella more effective if we'd seen Kylo arguing/interacting with memories of Han earlier instead of this happening for the first time NOW...

"Come home." Uhhhhhh, I honestly don't know what exactly Leia did, but she certainly kinda abetted killing him. What home does Kylo have now, anyway??

So Han says that what Leia fought for is still around, which is true, but Kylo is ostensibly the supreme leader here, so he doesn't just have to go AWOL, he can drag the FO leadership with him, and what passes for their government, he could SURRENDER and end the war right now. Does he? Of course not. He fucks off all by his lonesome after Rey and Palpatine because... that's all he knows how to do, apparently.

There's a callback that is supposed to resonate but doesn't work for me, because I just can't make myself feel for Kylo at all. Yes, redemption is hard. Yes, you have to work for it. Stop whining and just do it!!

We're supposed to think that Kylo will stab Han again (I guess?) but he turns and throws his saber into the sea. So that's why Rey didn't take it - so he could make a dramatic fucking gesture with it.

Palps is upset that Leia messed up his plans, but whatever. He orders Pryde, who apparently is now in charge of the FO in Kylo's absence, to come to Exegol. Apparently Pryde is a diehard Imperial (and possibly Sith cultist/Palpatine's secret puppet/agent??) I guess. It's never explained, he's just bad. And his name isn't subtle, either.

Palps just wants to burn everything to the ground for... evulz, I guess? I got nothing.

Pryde's star destroyer pops out a giant gun and blows up a planet.... apparently, Kijimi. Why, I don't know. Because they were just there?? Anyway, BOOM. Kijimi literally explodes.

What the actual fuck. How is that EVEN POSSIBLE?? What was the point of building two Death Stars if a Star Destroyer can do that????

Oh, apparently, that was the new model from the "Sith fleet" with a better upgrade. sounds fake, but okay. Poe is not thrilled by this news. The same Resistance member brings him the bad news, so I guess that's her official job??

Poe is genre-savvy enough to know that every ship in the Sith fleet has planet destroying weapons and they're doomed unless they stop the Final Order... which isn't new? I thought there was a countdown to an attack in 16 hours or something. What did they think they were attacking with? I don't even know, this movie is that incoherent.

Rose pops in with a message broadcasting on every channel about the "Resistance is dead. The Sith flame will burn. All worlds, surrender or die"... but given that it's in a language that isn't Basic, there's this one random dude with a beard who translates for the audience... and even though I assume it's meant to be some more commonly spoken language, given that the Sith have their own language in this movie, It makes it seem like this Random Resistance dude understands Sith and... I have questions.

Poe goes to sit by Leia's shrouded corpse because apparently they haven't buried her yet??? I wish Poe and Leia's relationship was more prominent in the movies, because I love the dynamic they're supposed to have, but never actually manifests in any of these movies.

Lando shows up to console him!

"How did you defeat an Empire with almost nothing?" "We had each other."

DAMN RIGHT YOU DID AND THE NEW GENERATION COULD TOO, IF THE WRITERS WEREN'T INTENT ON SEPARATING THEM CONSTANTLY AND MAKING EVERYBODY SUFFER....

Poe decides to make Finn his co-general. I have a lot of feels about this.

Turns out D-O knows all about Exegol because he used to belong to Ochi... that's actually earned, I'll allow it. Hilarious Rey never asked the droid about it (or any other details of his past, given that she was pretty sure Ochi killed her parents).

Ahch-To! Rey is wearing her hood and I don't know why. She's throwing driftwood into the flaming wreckage of Kylo's TIE and sobbing and... I don't know what's going on here. There are SO MANY REASONS she could be crying, I don't even know.

And she tosses her lightsaber into the sea... just like Kylo did. Parallels. I get it. And just like Luke did to her... She's giving it up because she doesn't feel worthy of being a Jedi because of her heritage, I guess?? (I'm guessing because this movie doesn't explain shit.)

Speaking of which, there's Luke's ghost, right on schedule! I love his snark but it's SO OUT OF LINE given his behavior in the last movie... and the fact that Yoda told him he had to let go of the past and let the books burn. I mean... the fuck???

Rey has this dark throne vision that's driving her, but ironically that's the one vision we don't see in this whole mess.. we have all these OTHER visions instead, I can' teven keep them all straight.

Oh, she's decided to model Luke and fuck off to Ahch-To forever because she feels she made a mistake. that's absolutely the WRONG LESSON from Luke's life, Rey!!

(also, what happened to saving the world? The sith wayfinder? She just conveniently forgot Palpatine was gonna slaughter everybody because she's having heritage angst?????)

Leia not telling Rey about Rey's heritage makes perfect sense when you realize just how much Leia's life was fucked over by the knowledge that Darth Vader was her father--once in ROTJ and again when she got kicked out of the Senate and ostracized in Bloodline.

Luke has Leia's lightsaber conveniently hidden in his hut... so now Kylo/Ben can have a weapon of his own in the upcoming fight, gag. (Really, Rey should use it to make a double-bladed saber, but she won't, sigh.)

The flashback looks like a video game to me. The CGI is not terrible, but doesn't look nearly as real as the rest of the film to me.

Also, I'm forever mad that Leia gave up her saber thinking it would save her son, that is SO AWFUL, especially since IT DIDN'T WORK, HE STILL TURNED OUT EVIL ANYWAY AND RUINED YOUR LIFE.

"A thousand generations live in you now" would have so much more resonance if Rey was an avatar of the Force or a reincarnation of Anakin instead of the metaphorical. (Yes, I know it will be realized literally later on.)

[Just realized that Kylo's obsession with Rey would make TOTAL SENSE if she were an reincarnation of Anakin given how much he idolizes his grandfather!!!]

Whyyyyy doesn't Luke talk here about the revelation that Palpatine is alive? That he and his father failed to kill the Emperor? That Rey has to finish LUKE'S journey, too??? But no, it's all about Leia here.

Rey somehow didn't notice the wayfinder in Kylo's TIE until Luke says "you have everything you need"... I guess? I don't know how she missed it before!!!

And the X-wing rises out of the water like the deus ex machina that it is... somehow still spaceworthy after six years in the ocean. Okay, then.

Apparently, Force ghost Luke can still manipulate physical objects through the Force??? Okay, I can kinda buy that, but... still....

I love how Artoo doesn't even wait for Threepio to get started with the bullshit, he just imports the uploaded memories right away without asking. Normally, I'd be mad about consent, but a) they're married, and b) he's restoring Threepio's personality, so I'm okay with it.

I love how warped and creepy the space is around Exegol.

Also, D-O looks just like a desk lamp.

Oh, so the Resistance follows Rey through Luke's X-wing computer via Artoo. Convoluted, but it works, I guess.

Okay, so time for some technobabble, but there's a navigation tower (the new shield generator) they have to hit for REASONS with a "ground team" (aka strike team). Sigh.

Love the dismissal of the "Holdo maneuver"--which is essentially kamikaze-style suicide. Not a great battle strategy if you want to survive the fight.

Wait, wasn't Poe angsting earlier about how nobody answered their call from Crait back in the last movie? What makes him think this is going to be any different?????

Okay, so all the FO folks on are on Exegol now?? Who is piloting and crewing those Star Destroyers?? Are they First Order or Final Order people? What happened to the First Order? What is the relationship between the First Order and the Final Order? Are they the same thing with two different names?? (But no, there are two fleets, the Sith destroyers are different.) What happened to the First Order then? Does anyone notice and/or care the alleged "Supreme Leader" of the First Order is missing in action??? I'M SO CONFUSED.

Okay, it makes sense that Poe is in an X-wing given he's a hotshot pilot, but he's also a general, and... I'm so confused about the tactical aspect of that, but fine, whatever. Also, Artoo is in the X-wing with him instead of BB-8, who I thought was Poe's droid (to the point of reaming Rey over injuring him earlier in the film!!!) WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE???

we're baaaaacck in the creepy sith ruins just like the beginning of the film, but so much has happened that my brain has fried and so the parallels are not as compelling as they could be.

WHEN DID THEY PICK UP JANNAH?? Has she been there the entire time and we just didn't see her until now, or did they stop back at Endor's moon along the way??? I'M SO CONFUSED!!!

Finn has " a feeling" where the ship is... it's the Force, why are you teasing us like that. LET HIM BE A JEDI.

Okay, I actually really like the fact that all the FO deserter stormtroopers from Endor are using their mounts so their enemies can use the tech against them. That's poetic justice right there. And also, epic cool. Good thing all the ships are still in the atmosphere... (nobody's wearing masks like Finn did for the Kijimi pickup)

I don't know how there is lightning in a fucking underground pyramid, but 10/10 for aesthetic, I love it.

"Grandma, it's me, Anastasia"--oh, wait, never mind.

The reveal that Rey is in a giant arena is hella creepy, even though it makes NO SENSE WHATSOEVER. Where do all these people come from? What do they do? Where do they live? What do they EAT?? Are they born Sith? Brainwashed Sith?? Cultists? Clones??? I NEED ANSWERS HERE.

Palpatine dangling in his creepy metal arm-thing is a lot like GLADoS from Portal.

So... Palpatine can possess the person who kills him in anger??? Explains a LOT about how he treated Luke, actually. And why it was so important that Anakin finish him - one, because Anakin's body was failing, and two, because he did it for love.

Love the aesthetic of the flickering lights for added creepiness and nothing is quite real. Even if it makes no sense. My id knows what it wants, okay??

Jannah and Finn teaming up for the battle is great, BB-8 actually gets to do something for once, and I love Jannah's crossbow.

Oh, now Palps is going to monologue about Rey's parents, while telling us no interesting details whatsoever. Sigh.

HOW THE FUCK DID KYLO GET TO EXEGOL AGAIN????????????????? she left him stranded in the middle of a frikkin' OCEAN... and he just knows how to get back to Exegol without the macguffin,.... how....?

(yes, I know he's supposed to be "Ben Solo" again, but so far there has been zero explanation in the film itself, so I'm just gonna keep calling him Kylo.)

Okay, there's a TIE fighter next to the X-wing, but... where did he GET IT?????????

That "ow" is priceless. I watched that sequence twice.

(clearly Kylo has not been exploring ruins much recently.)

Finn explaining to Rose that he's going to sacrifice himself for the cause, exactly like she wouldn't let him do in the last film... and Rose goes with it. Okay, then.

Now Kylo has to fight his own boy band... who were secretly following the Emperor's orders the entire time (?) THE ENTIRE FIRST ORDER WAS LITERALLY A FRONT TO KEEP KYLO REN DISTRACTED AND KYLO TOTALLY BOUGHT IT. I... have questions, but I actually admire the sheer audacity of this.

Kylo fighting said knights would be way more emotionally engaging if we a) knew anything about them, b) had seen any interactions between Kylo and the knights earlier, and c) gave a shit, but none of those happened, so we don't.

Kylo and Rey have some sort of Force bond communication thing that is super vaguely filmed so it's hard to understand wtf is actually happening. Rey tosss her saber back and... Ben pulls it out behind his back.

what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the FUCK

I won't say that wasn't forshadowed, because it kinda-sorta was. I will just say that this movie has NEVER EXPLAINED HOW THEY CAN DO THAT or talked about it at ALL, just treats it like a fact, and I... have questions about how reality can be bent that way even if you are a Force dyad or whatnot.

So Kylo's fight with the knights parallels Rey's fight with a bunch of Imperial guards and it's so hard to care. Th timer says there's still a half an hour left, how is that possible???

So... it's okay to stab people as long as you do it with the properly colored lightsaber, I guess???

Kylo shows up, he and Rey exchange Meangingful Looks, they raise their sabers, Palps zaps them and slurps up "the lifeforce of your bond" and uses it to grow younger, whatever the hell that means ughhhhhhhh please let this be over soon.

Did he know they were a dyad before? Is THIS his real plan? I'm so confused and I have no idea wtf is going on.

RIP Snap. I guess I should care more about you, but I don't think you're mentioned in any of the other movies, so... *shrugs*

Poe has a meltdown but.... Lando shows up AGAIN to give him a pep talk, and also a fleet. Like seriously, Lando gets results, if he'd been running the Resistance, the war would be OVER by now.

Is the "Nice flying, Lando!" Older!Wedge?? I think so. I hope so, anyway.

Zorii shows up too, to fight and also insult Poe over the comm... I guess she's upset about Kijimi being destroyed? (Or maybe not given how she was so eager to get off it???)

Palps tosses Kylo into a pit, which... given that Palps survived, maybe not the best plan if you wanted to actually kill him.

Then he shoots force lightning through the hole in the arena into the sky and... zaps all the new fighters.

Well.

Okay then.

Rey wakes up and... reaches out to the spirits of past Jedi for help. (Apparently, Palpatine doesn't care about her killing him now, because he's young and healthy again, so it's okay to kill her? I guess he can always try again with another grandkid, lol.)

Also, it's funny how Rey is a Palpatine and blood is sooooo important and scary and destiny until someone's trying to diss her and then she's just "a scavenger girl". And by funny, I mean terrible. Sigh.

"I am all the Sith." I don't think the Sith, by the nature of their existence, can embody their predecessors the way that the Jedi can. I mean, to be a Sith is to be alone, and there is that whole Rule of Two business if that's still canon now. I mean, unless the Sith literally eat their masters and thus become them? But it seems a little late for THAT detail.

But it's okay because Rey's embodying all the Jedi this time (and has TWO sabers, lol) and she turns Palpatine's Force lightning back on himself and he turns into a crisp. You'd think the Sith Lords would have worked out a defense against that, since that's how Mace Windu scarred him in the first place, but okay then.

The entire arena crumbles. All the faceless cultists are crushed by falling rock. Pryde goeth before the fall. Lando rescues Finn and Jannah before Poe can. All the star destroyers are stranded because the command ship is gone and start blowing up.

Anyway, Rey collapses in the ruins. Finn senses her fall. but Kylo climbs out of the pit and cradles her in his arms. (ewww ewww ewwwwwww NOOOOOOO) and cradles her to his chest [gross gross grossssssss she's dead and can't consent and I can't decide if that makes it grosser or not, she's never let him do this while she was ALIVE fuckkkkkk]. He finally lets go and then places his hand on her stomach, and ughhhhhh I have so many issues with this I don't care if he's reformed, he's been stalking for three films, this is NOT OKAY and does the Force healing trick, and...

literally he could have just put a hand on her forehead or shoulder, which I would still hate, but would be less creepy than this.

Rey wakes up, puts her hands on his, sits up, startled and... doesn't say anything, doesn't even flinch, and smiles. "Ben."

and she kisses him. I knew this was coming. I still hate it.

he smiles, falls over, and dies. Like, literally, it's like Rey's kiss murdered him. I'm a terrible person, I know, but I really can't mourn him.

Kylo's body vanishes (Leia's stayed intact, damn it!) proving I guess that he was good after all?? I thought only special people learned the vanishing trick??? Leia's body vanishes right at the same time, and... I don't get it, I really don't.

Maz apparently skipped the final battle to watch over Leia's corpse and I.... definitely don't get it.

was Leia possessing her son this whole time? What. Just. Happened??????

Rey flies away in Luke's X-wing under her own power, and... "Red Five is in the air again," says Finn. People are rising up all over the galaxy, though against what, I'm not clear, and the skies are suddenly clear, implying that the Emperor was warping the weather with his darkness.

We see Star Destroyers blowing up behind Cloud City and on the FOREST moon of Endor with the Ewoks and I just... never knew they were there??? Were they connected to the rest of the Fleet somehow (like the Katana fleet in Legends??) Where did this come from?? Wicket and his son are clearly satisfied, though why they think anything's going to change is beyond me. And was the First Order oppressing them? Why didn't we see any of their fleet when our protagonists were IN THAT SYSTEM AND SO WAS THE OSTENSIBLE SUPREME LEADER???

Another Star Destroyer crashes on Jakku, so literally NOTHING HAS CHANGED THERE, LOL.

Back at the Resistance Jungle Base, everyone cries and hugs, Poe and Zorii have a moment that goes nowhere, Poe's arm is somehow in a sling (???) There's a very brief lesbian kiss, but it gets even less screen time than Rose Tico, so again, don't think that counts as representation, but nice try.

Maz gives Chewie Han's medal from Yavin and... where the hell did she get it??? Leia's corpse??? Creepy!!

Jannah comes up to Lando and asks him where he's from, and when Lando asks the same question, she say she doesn't know. "Let's find out." Wow, that's way more interesting than most of this movie!

Rey hugs Finn and Poe and I... just... it's the tearful hug of "wow, we've all been through a lot of trauma since we last saw each other and also I was a jerk and threw you across the sea with the Force to get you out of my way and I abandoned you without saying goodbye to isolate myself on an island in the middle of nowhere until my ghost mentor reminded me I could save the day".

ButWeDon'tHavetimetounpackThatNow.jpg

Rey takes the Falcon to the Lars' moisture farm on Tatooine with BB-8. No one is in sight. This is an abandoned house in the middle of nowhere, not a shrine to the Legend of Luke Skywalker. Rey slides down the sides on a piece of metal and into the courtyard. She wraps up Luke and Leia's sabers and... we cut to her back up on the ridge near the droid garage, using the Force to bury them in the sand.

Then she pulls out her own saber and it's yellow-bladed and looks like a double quarterstaff (although I only saw the top blade ignite). What she should have had this entire movie.

There's a random woman with an eopie there, who... came over to investigate? there is literally NO ONE ELSE FOR MILES. HOW????

The woman asks who she is, and we have callbacks to that earlier conversation on Pasaana. Rey hesitates, sees Luke and Leia's ghost on the horizon, smiling their approval and says "Rey Skywalker". The movie ends with her standing watching the double sunset... alone except for BB-8.

Wow, she's literally come full circle from being alone in the desert with a droid to being alone in a different desert with the same droid. What the fuck.

Cue triumphant music and credits.

Oh, and I just realized we never found out what was so important for Finn to tell Rey about... so that went nowhere. I assume it's "he can use the Force" but apparently that wasn't important enough to ACTUALLY INCLUDE, sigh.

Did Rey fuck off to Tatooine to be a hermit? Is she going back to her friends? Is she going to train the next generation of Jedi? How will she keep the cycle from repeating? Is it broken? Is Palpatine really dead this time??? How does she feel about Kylo/Ben?? Is HIS ghost still around stalking her, too? Why did she take the Falcon? Doesn't it belong to Chewie now? Why didn't the rest of the gang come with her???? I'm so confused.

This was even worse than I had anticipated, and I came into this with super-low expectations. This wasn’t bad in a “bad B-movie kind of way,” this was bad in the “nothing makes sense, it’s all jumbled blur, I am numb and cannot begin to care” kind of spectacle. I cannot imagine watching this in a theater. No wonder the critics savaged this.

#star wars #lily liveblogs #WHY DISNEY WHY

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