#answered –– m. watson.

[grooveys]

hear me out… aunt ana…

[beekeeperspicnic]

Can't believe this blog has existed THIS long, and I've somehow never shared this Sherlock Holmes fanfic by PG Wodehouse. As far as I know it predates Conan Doyle publishing any stories which mention Holmes retiring to keep bees, which presents the delightful possibility that ACD discussed his future plans for Holmes with his young friend Plum, whose first reaction was to go off and write (and publish) a cute parody of it.

The Adventure of the Missing Bee

Sherlock Holmes is to retire from public life after Christmas, and take to bee-farming in the country.

"It is a little hard, my dear Watson," said Holmes, stretching his long form on the sofa, and injecting another half-pint of morphia with the little jewelled syringe which the Prince of Piedmont had insisted on presenting to him as a reward for discovering who had stolen his nice new rattle; "it is just a little hard that an exhausted, overworked private detective, coming down to the country in search of peace and quiet, should be confronted in the first week by a problem so weird, so sinister, that for the moment it seems incapable of solution."

"You refer—?" I said.

"To the singular adventure of the missing bee, as anybody but an ex-army surgeon equipped with a brain of dough would have known without my telling him."

I readily forgave him his irritability, for the loss of his bee had had a terrible effect on his nerves. It was a black business. Immediately after arriving at our cottage, Holmes had purchased from the Army and Navy Stores a fine bee. It was docile, busy, and intelligent, and soon made itself quite a pet with us. Our consternation may, therefore, be imagined when, on going to take it out for its morning run, we found the hive empty. The bee had disappeared, collar and all. A glance at its bed showed that it had not been slept in that night. On the floor of the hive was a portion of the insect's steel chain, snapped. Everything pointed to sinister violence.

Holmes' first move had been to send me into the house while he examined the ground near the hive for footsteps. His search produced no result. Except for the small, neat tracks of the bee, the ground bore no marks. The mystery seemed one of those which are destined to remain unsolved through eternity.

But Holmes was ever a man of action.

"Watson," he said to me, about a week after the incident, "the plot thickens. What does the fact that a Frenchman has taken rooms at Farmer Scroggins' suggest to you?"

"That Farmer Scroggins is anxious to learn French," I hazarded.

"Idiot!" said Holmes, scornfully. "You've got a mind like a railway bun. No. If you wish to know the true significance of that Frenchman's visit, I will tell you. But, in the first place, can you name any eminent Frenchman who is interested in bees?"

I could answer that.

"Maeterlinck," I replied. "Only he is a Belgian."

"It is immaterial. You are quite right. M. Maeterlinck was the man I had in my mind. With him bees are a craze. Watson, that Frenchman is M. Maeterlinck's agent. He and Farmer Scroggins have conspired, and stolen that bee."

"Holmes!" I said, horrified. "But M. Maeterlinck is a man of the most rigid honesty."

"Nobody, my dear Watson, is entirely honest. He may seem so, because he never meets with just that temptation which would break through his honesty. I once knew a bishop who could not keep himself from stealing pins. Every man has his price. M. Maeterlinck's is bees. Pass the morphia."

"But Farmer Scroggins!" I protested. "A bluff, hearty English yeoman of the best type."

"May not his heartiness be all bluff?" said Holmes, keenly. "You may take it from me that there is literally nothing that that man would stick at. Murder? I have seen him kill a wasp with a spade, and he looked as if he enjoyed it. Arson? He has a fire in his kitchen every day. You have only to look at the knuckle of the third finger of his left hand to see him as he is. If he is an honest man, why does he wear a made-up tie on Sundays? If he is an upright man, why does he stoop when he digs potatoes? No, Watson, nothing that you can say can convince me that Farmer Scroggins has not a black heart. The visit of this Frenchman—who, as you can see in an instant if you look at his left shoulder-blade, has not only deserted his wife and a large family, but is at this very moment carrying on a clandestine correspondence with an American widow, who lives in Kalamazoo, Mich. — convinces me that I have arrived at the true solution of the mystery. I have written a short note to Farmer Scroggins, requesting him to send back the bee and explaining that all is discovered. And that," he broke off, "is, if I mistake not, his knock. Come in."

The door opened. There was a scuffling in the passage, and in bounded our missing bee, frisking with delight. Our housekeeper followed, bearing a letter. Holmes opened it.

"Listen to this, Watson," said Holmes, in a voice of triumph.

"'Mr. Giles Scroggins sends his compliments to Mr. Sherlock Holmes, an' it's quite true, I did steal that there bee, though how Mr. Holmes found out, Mr. G. Scroggins bean't able to understand. I am flying the country as requested. Please find enclosed 1 (one) bee, and kindly acknowledge receipt to 'Your obedient servant, 'G. Scroggins.

'Enclosure.'?"

"Holmes," I whispered, awe-struck, "you are one of the most remarkable men I ever met."

He smiled, lit his hookah, seized his violin, and to the slow music of that instrument turned once more to the examination of his test tubes.

Three days later we saw the following announcement in the papers: "M. Maeterlinck, the distinguished Belgian essayist, wishes it to be known that he has given up collecting bees, and has taken instead to picture postcards."

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hii, I was wondering if you had any recs of a writer/author John au. I've found some of author Sherlock, but none of John except his blogging that he does normally. if you don't do recs anymore or don't feel like answering feel free to ignore and have a lovely day! <3

Hi Nonny!

Oh I'm still doing weekly lists, I just don't get many asks for them anymore so I feel like y'all don't like them anymore LOL. BUT!! Your ask is a fantastic excuse to use your ask as a list prompt since I don't have one ready for today!! I actually find the opposite, that there seem to be more "writer John" fics more than the other way around, especially as I've been going through my lists.

That said, I've done a tag search for "writer" and "author" on my offline lists, and here's what I got! Hope you enjoy and as usual, if anyone has any fics that they would like to suggest, please add them below!!

WRITER / AUTHOR JOHN

BOOKMARKS

A Gossamer Dream by CarmillaCarmine (E, 15,985 w., 4 Ch. || Writer/Teacher AU || First Meetings, Friends to Lovers, Writer John / Teacher Sherlock, Fluff, London, Holding Hands, Online Friendship / Romance, Phone Sex, Anal Sex, Happy Ending, Alternating POV, Scottish John, Online Relationship, Internalized Homophobia, Hand Holding, Forehead Touching, First Kiss/Time, Texting/Sexting, Rimming, Toplock, Sherlock Speaks French)��– Sherlock had never realised one could care so much about someone they'd never met in person. Now he is about to meet the friend with whom he's been chatting online for months and his anticipation is reaching a crescendo. Part 19 of Johnlock Smut (with Feels)

Being John Watson-ish by elwinglyre (E, 69,902 w., 17 Ch. || Bodysnatcher AU || Author John, Cranky Sherlock, Angst, Sexual Tension, First Kiss / Time, Falling in Love, BAMF John, Past Soldier John, Feelings, Inside Someone’s Brain, Shy Sherlock, Sherlock Loves John, POV Sherlock, Switchlock, Slow Burn, Internal Dialogue, Mental Turmoil) – When consulting detective Sherlock Holmes steps on one toe too many at a crime scene, he's consigned to a desk job in an archaic office on the seventh-and-a-half floor of the New Scotland Yard. It’s in this bleak office that Sherlock discovers a portal into the mind of renowned author John Watson. Grander than his mind palace, this new wonderland affords Sherlock new vistas of experimentation. To learn more about the mystery behind the portal, Sherlock seeks out and befriends Watson. But then it all goes wrong when others find the secret portal door—including the man whose brain he visits.

MARKED FOR LATER

Exposition - An Ex Files Special by 7PercentSolution (T, 7,643 w., 12 Ch. || POV Second Person, Angst, Bereavement, Poetry / Haiku, Hallucinations, Writing as Therapy) – John's a writer. However much Sherlock derided the blog, people read what he writes. After the fall, John's writing takes a surprisingly different approach. This sets the context for a series of chapters, each one including a different poem by John. Part 4 of Ex Files

keywords: Gay, Loving, Boyfriends by lookupkate (E, 17,771 w., 17 Ch. || Doctor John AU || Alternate First Meeting, Hospitals, John Writes Smut, Sherlock Reads Smut, Fanfiction) – John starts writing gay romance while holed up in hospital. Sherlock reads the first fic on accident, and it sticks with him for days. He can't help but read more from the unknown writer. Little does he know, the writer isn't exactly unknown to him. The writer happens to be the A&E Doctor he's feuding with. Christ, can you imagine what he'll think once he finds out? 

Dead Letter Office by a_different_equation (M, 20,364 w., 15 Ch. || ‘Bartleby’ Fusion / Office Setting AU || Different First Meeting, Epistolary, John's Blog, Angst with a Happy Ending, Pre-Canon, John Watson is Sherlock's Boss, PTSD John, Military Backstory, Writer John, Drug Use, Texting) – John Watson comes home from the war, gets a new job and meets Sherlock Holmes through Mike Stamford. Same tale since 1891, except this time it’s 2008, John is Sherlock’s boss, and they work together at the Dead Letter Office in London. It's not a love story, until it finally is.

The Reawakening of John Watson by  221b_careful_what_you_wish_for (E, 20,463 w., 14 Ch. || Historical 1800s American/Victorian AU || Artist Sherlock, Writer John, Angst with Happy Ending, Bisexual John, Period Typical Homophobia, Sensuality, Experienced Sherlock, Pining, Past Drug Use, Slow Burn, Love Confessions, Flirty Sherlock, Frottage, Outdoor Sex, Trust Issues, Minor Character Death, Sexual Tension, Colorado / London, Rimming, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs,  POV John) – Trying to escape his troubled past in England, John Watson has started a new life in the American West. When he meets the handsome artist Sherlock Holmes, a smoldering attraction is sparked, complicating his quiet, carefully guarded existence. Maybe taking a risk with Sherlock is exactly what John needs to feel alive again...

The Key to Castles in the Air by LadyKailitha (T, 34,365 w., 21 Ch. || Author AU || Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Bratty Sherlock, Damaged Sherlock, Romance, Shop Clerk/Writer John) – John is a clerk (and writing a book on the side) at a bookshop run by Mrs Hudson. The one downside to this perfect job is Sherlock Darling, Mrs Hudson's friend who loves to rile John up. About everything. All that changes when they are forced to spend a week together in the country when bad weather hits. Sherlock's got secrets. What will John do once he finds them out?

There I Saw You, Night by esplanade (T, 54,073 w., 12 Ch. || Writer AU || Poet Sherlock, Writer John, True Love, Sherlock's A Mess, Conversations, John's Family) – "It wasn't as if he had stopped writing entirely. Quite the opposite, in fact. It was just that most of what he wrote ended up thrown into the fireplace at home. What was the sense in keeping something that was sub-par?"

This Is Your Song by agirlsname (E, 79,990 w., 19 Ch. || Moulin Rouge Fusion || Prostitute Sherlock, Poet John, Acting, Singing, Dancing, Writing, Poetry, Musical, Song Fic, Heavy Angst, Unreliable Narrator, Sherlock is French, Love at First Sight, UST, First Kiss/Time, Frottage, Coming in Pants, Anal Sex, Switchlock, Clothed Sex, Crossdressing, Secret Relationship, Forbidden Love, Jealousy, Terminal Illnesses, Grief/Mourning, Breakup/Makeup Sex, Past Drug Use, Attempted Rape, Canon-Typical Violence)– When John Watson is invalided home from the army in 1895, he moves to Paris to rediscover his writing and find a new meaning in life. His old friend Stamford invites him into a group of artist friends, and suddenly John finds himself auditioning to write a show for the famous brothel across the street. There, he meets the most beautiful man he’s ever seen - Sherlock, the star of the Moulin Rouge. But Sherlock is already promised to the investor of the show, the rich Duke Moriarty.

A Case of Identity – The Musical by shamelessmash (E, 83,147 w., 15 Ch. || 1950′s Hollywood AU || Musical, Case Fic, Undercover as an Actor, Dancing, Happy Ending, Kidnapping, Drugs, Fluff and Angst, Humour, Writer/Director John, Slow Burn / Romance) – A mysterious death on set causes chaos in Stamford productions latest movie. With the premiere date left unchanged, they must find a new lead actor and reshoot an entire movie in two months. Sherlock Holmes goes undercover as a lead actor in a Musical: a juggling act to solve a murder while singing, dancing and charming his way through 1950s Hollywood. The last thing he expected was to fall in love with the screenwriter along the way. Or as I like to call it: the case where Sherlock finally gets to dance.

WORKS IN PROGRESS

Children of the Revolution by BadNewsForBrainWork (E, 7,655+ w., 4/? Ch. || WiP || Moulin Rouge AU || Prostitution, BDSM, Multiple Pairings) –  John is an English writer travelling to the small village of Montmartre in Paris, France is hopes of taking part in the Bohemian Revolution. As soon as he arrives, he gets swept up by the revolutionaries and taken to the Moulin Rouge where he meets Sherlock Holmes. He quickly finds himself caught in a dangerous love triangle that could risk his entire career and maybe even his life.

Wood and Wicker by HardlyFair (M, 14,114+ w., 3/8 Ch. || WW2 Historical AU / Hot Fuzz AU || BAMF John, Case Fic, Secret Societies, Secrets, Romance, Humour, Action, Writer John, Murder Mystery) – 1946. Sandford, England. Following the second World War, Sherlock Holmes accepts an unwanted case far in the English countryside to investigate a string of grisly deaths. Problems arise when it becomes clear that no one thinks anyone has been murdered at all, that nothing outside a series of unfortunate accidents has transpired, and that nothing untoward is afoot in Sandford -- no one, save for a small-time columnist from the local newspaper.

Christmas in Honeycutt by helloliriels (T, 27,950+ w., 14/23 Ch. || WIP || Christmas in Connecticut AU / WWII AU || Kidnapping, Spies / Secret Agents, Codes & Ciphers, Past Relationships, Developing Relationship, Fake Marriage, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending) – John's publisher asks if his family could entertain a war hero at their idyllic estate in Somerset for Christmas. Only ... John doesn't have a wife ... or a daughter. Or an estate. He has a bedsit. In London. And some wounds of his own to recover from ... but he can't tell his publisher that or he'll get fired … What's a writer to do? Cracking Codes. Super Spies. Sherlock in Disguise. A wild Christmas romance set in the countryside! Just what the doctor ordered! Part 6 of the Liriels Chaptered Fics series

Novel by lifeonmars (M, 50,264+ w., 10/? Ch. || WiP || Author AU || Fairy Tales / Red Riding Hood Elements, Fantasy, Writer’s Block, Falling in Love, Peter Pan References, Slow Burn, Romance, Writer John, Editor Sherlock) – John Watson has writer's block. Sherlock Holmes is the world's best consulting editor. Whether John can write a book is another story entirely.

How Novel Series by StarlightAndFireflies (T, 66,472+ w. across 11 Stories || Series WiP || Writer John / Unilock AU || Book Signing, Flirting, Dating, Shy  Sherlock, Romance, Getting to Know Each Other) – AU in which John is an author, and Sherlock is a fan who comes to his book signing.

[stereopticons]

On This Day in Schitt's Creek: April 29

2019

gay sex starter kit [david/patrick, E, 4,757] by mihaly

Patrick may be emotionally and mentally ready to bottom for David, but he is in no way physically ready to take David's massive cock. David has an idea to get him there.

Hurts 2B Human [david/patrick, T, 2,523] by @wildxwiredmakes

David has never enjoyed his birthdays, mostly because he’s never had anyone to celebrate with. Sure, there were people, but they were just bodies, just faces beaming up at him with fake sincerity as he bought yet another round of drinks. His birthdays always reminded him how alone he was... — OR what I think would happen if David didn’t go to dinner with Patrick on his birthday.

Let Me Be Your Prince Charming [david/patrick, NR, 3,113] by deathbysandblk

David's POV of the night in "Damsel in Distress"

2021

[Podfic] birth is a curse (and existence a prison) | written by monsterbate [david/patrick, M, podfic] by Tipsy_Kitty

“You’ve seen Beauty and the Beast, David.” Alexis is trimming her nails again. They seem to be growing faster than usual, like David’s hair, which is a thing he is not going to dwell on. “The Emma Watson vehicle?” Stevie scoffs. “Are you claiming to have never seen the original Disney masterpiece?” “Okay, excuse me for not remembering an early 90s cartoon like some kind of manual for living or something—” “Anyways, this is that. You’re trapped in an enchantment of your own screw-ups. Congratulations.” Stevie throws her hands wide like some bastardization of jazz hands. “Wait—am I Dan Stevens in this situation? Because that’s not going to work. Like, at all.”

[Podfic] Save the Date [david/patrick, G, podfic] by Amanita_Fierce @hagface @schittyfic

“I could go with you,” David offers tentatively. “Pretend to be your date?” An almost fake dating fic. [Podfic of "Save the Date," written by schittposting]

All the doors I closed one time will open up again [david/patrick, G, 100] by @simplymarleycat

A drabble where David's dreams take him back, but his present quickly reminds him of the truth.

Basically His Only Friend [alexis & johnny, NR, 1,414] by jmda4

(Takes place during 5x13 The Hike) Minutes after realizing that she'd miss her family, Alexis feels her stomach drop when she checks her phone and sees a stream of missed texts from Stevie."Your Dad's in the hospital. They don't know what's wrong.""We're at Elmdale Hospital. He was having chest pain and couldn't breathe.""Alexis?"

Budd is a dud! Vote Sands. [stevie/twyla, T, 7,718] by @samwhambam

Her and Twyla are friends. Not great friends. But friends who get high together at parties and have known each other for a long time. And up until right now, she thought they were better friends than a shitty, mean campaign slogan. The enemies to lovers fic where Stevie and Twyla are both running for the same seat on town council.

David Rose vs the House Hippo [david/patrick, T, 1,100] by @mostlyinthemorning

David and Patrick’s new house comes with a surprise tenant and David’s not sure how he feels about it. Patrick, on the other hand, is very excited.

Do we soon forget the things we cannot see? [david/patrick, t, 5,516] by @kiwiana-writes

David grimaces. He doesn’t not believe in ghosts, and he’s watched enough horror films in his time to know that summoning them on purpose does not, in fact, seem like a great idea. “Is that really a high school slumber party thing, though?”

Fall Off a Bridge, Please [david/patrick, T, 7,661] by @hagface

“I told you,” he says, “You’ve got to answer a question.” “You never said I had to do anything,” David bites back, the pitch of his voice climbing ever higher. “If you’re that hung up on semantics I should clarify that it’s actually a riddle.” “A riddle!” David knows he’s yelling now because he can hear his voice echoing down the bank and through the trees. “What are you,” he asks, “some kind of troll?” “Actually—” the man smiles again, “—yes.” OR: Patrick is a troll who guards the Schitt's Creek bridge. David must answer his riddles in order to cross into Elmdale, where he works at The Blouse Barn.

I had a thought dear, however scary [david/patrick, G, 511] by petrichor_apothecary

Patrick does a bit of thinking a couple weeks before proposing to David.

so this is the miracle that i've been dreaming of [david/patrick, T, 10,335] by @hullomoon

After finally accepting the arranged marriage his parents made, David meets Patrick. Sparks fly and now David has to figure out whether he will follow through with the marriage or be with Patrick.

The Guestbook of David Rose and Patrick Brewer [gen, G, 900] by @landofsonlali

“A home isn't always the house we live in. It's also the people we choose to surround ourselves with.” — The House in the Cerulean Sea A look through the entries in David and Patrick's wedding guestbook

2022

You're As Cold as Ice [david/patrick, g, 1,026] by mindswindowsdoors

The door to the guest room squeaks open and David hears his husband's frustrated sigh. "David, what are you doing?" "Sleeping. What does it look like?" He doesn't care how petulant he sounds. "Baby, would you please come to bed?" "I am in bed. And we are not doing baby."

2023

Mother's Intuition [marcy & patrick, T, 1,027, CW: self-harm] by elifisher96

Marcy is worried about her son and one day realizes her intuition was right.

Oceans and Puddles [david/patrick, E, 12,804] by @wordthieve

A collection* of missing moments from You Can Fall *aspirational

The Happy Years [david/patrick, T, 71,914] by 1ethereal1

The Brewer-Rose Family and their crazy lives in Schitt's Creek. ------ Continuation of The Younger Years

Stats:

No fanworks for 2017, 2018, 2020, or 2024 2019: 3 fics/10,393 words 2021: 11 fanworks (9 fics, 2 podfics)/35,293 words 2022: 1 fic/1,026 words 2023: 3 fics/85,745 words Total: 18 fanworks (16 fics, 2 podfics)/132,457 words

[calaisreno]

The Case of the Missing Bridegroom

The sequel to Reluctant Bridegroom. 1700 words / Prompt: Cold

Summary: Mrs Hudson does not make tea, Mycroft speaks in italics, and Sherlock goes for a walk.

Mrs Hudson is frowning at him; he gradually becomes aware that she’s been talking. 

Blinking, he looks up. “Hm?”

“I said, do you like her?”

“Who?”

“Mary.”

“Oh, yes. She’s great. Are you making tea?”

Ignoring his implied request, she continues. “She seems clever.”

“Clever? Yes, she is. Quite.” 

…only child linguist Clever part time nurse Shortsighted Guardian Bakes Own Bread Disillusioned Cat Lover Romantic Appendix Scar Lib Dem Secret Tattoo Size 12 Liar…

Liar. 

That might be where to begin his investigation.

“Sherlock.” She clicks her tongue. “You must have known.”

“Known? What are you jabbering about, Mrs Hudson?”

“You must have known he’d move on while you were gone.”

He doesn’t have an answer for this. 

“He’s just that kind of person,” she adds.

“The moving on kind?”

“No, he’s the staying kind, but you left. What was he supposed to do? He thought you were dead.”

Sherlock puts his head down and mumbles incoherently. Maybe she will take the hint and make tea. And bring up some biscuits as well. 

“Sherlock.” She sits in John’s chair. “He’s not like you, love. Not a loner. He needs someone. He had you, and when you died—”

“He didn’t have me, Mrs Hudson. We weren’t like that.”

She gives him the look that means he’s an idiot. “Maybe not, but there was something there. And John needed that. He was lost without you. I’m sure he wouldn’t have found Mary if you’d come home a bit sooner.”

“Well, I’m sure they’ll be very happy.”

She makes a scoffing noise. “You know that’s not true.”

He scoffs back at her. “As I understand it, people who are engaged to be married often go through a period of regret. Cold feet, it’s called. Fear of change. A reluctance to follow through. He’ll get over it.”

“Will he?” 

Before Mrs Hudson can explain to him why he’s wrong, his phone buzzes with a text.

John’s missing. M

It takes him just a second to realise it’s Mary.  

He never came home last night. Won’t answer my texts. M

 I’ll find him. SH

Liar. He opens his phone and begins to type a message. Before he can hit send, his phone rings.

“He’s not an idiot, Sherlock.”

“Where is he, Mycroft? I know you have surveillance on him. What I want to know is why?”

“Let’s just say, he’s attracted the attention of someone we’ve been watching. You need not worry.”

He pinches the bridge of his nose. “Mycroft, I’m not in the mood for—”

“Miss Morstan. What do you know about her?”

“Why don’t you just tell me what you know? As I recall, you said you’d keep Moriarty’s London people away from him.”

“She’s not one of Moriarty’s. Just a freelancer, recently retired.”

“When were you going to tell me? More importantly, when were you going to tell John?”

“Doctor Watson is not an idiot, as I’ve said. His decision to propose to her was rash, I thought, but I’m fairly sure he’s having cold feet since you have returned.”

Mycroft speaks in italics only when he’s amused, Sherlock notes. “Just tell me where he is.”

“I think you can deduce,” Mycroft replies. 

I must be getting slow, he thinks. He’s just been to all the places John used to go when he ‘needed some air’ and slammed the door of the flat behind him. He’s been to five pubs, popped into three coffee shops, and walked the perimeter of the park twice.

Home again, he sits on the stairs, conceding defeat. 

His phone rings. 

“Mycroft.”

“It’s very simple, Sherlock. He’s gone home.”

He nods. It would have been nice if Mary had texted to say—

“Home, Sherlock.”

His head jerks up. Ending the call, he runs up the two flights to John’s room. He knocks and cracks the door open. “John?”

The shape in the bed stirs, rolls over and blinks at him. “Sherlock?”

“John, what are you doing here?”

“Needed to think.” He sits up. “Went around the park a few times last night after I left. More than a few. Decided to sleep here.”

Sherlock steps into the room. When John lived here, Sherlock rarely respected his privacy, barging into the room at any hour. Now, it feels like an invasion. 

“May I?”

John nods, and Sherlock sits on the bed. “What’s wrong?”

“You always told me I see but do not observe. I’m a bit slow, but I did actually learn a few things living with you.” He smiles. “After you died, I could barely cope. I sleepwalked through every day. And then, you came back, and it was like I woke up.”

“I’m sorry. I had no idea you’d be so affected.”

“I believe you. As angry as I’ve been, I have forgiven you. Since you came back, I’ve been awake. And I’ve noticed things… that disturb me.”

“What things?”

“In the cab going home that night, Mary kept talking, and I just had this feeling… she wasn’t who she said she was. So I did what you would do. I investigated. I called her job references. I looked up her employment history. I went through her things when she was out. And I made a deduction.”

“Yes?”

“I think you already know, Sherlock. Mary didn’t exist until a couple years ago. I don’t know who the woman I’m engaged to is, but Mary Morstan was an infant who died in 1972. Stillborn. She’s borrowed a name, made a new life. And for some reason, she took a job at my surgery.” He looks at Sherlock. “Maybe she has a good reason, but my spidey-senses are tingling.”

“Spidey-senses?”

“Spider Man. He can always sense danger.”

“Well, you always did. You knew whenever I was getting myself into trouble. So, what are you going to do?”

“I’m going to tell her the truth.”

“You should know, Mycroft’s people have been watching her. She’s freelance, recently retired. It might not be good to confront her with what you know. She may feel cornered, and that could be dangerous.”

“Not that truth, Sherlock. I don’t need to know who she is, but I’m not going to marry her.”

“But… what reason will you give?”

“I’ll tell her…” John looks down at his hands, licks his lips, and whispers, “I’m in love with my best friend.”

“You’re in love with Mike Stamford? Inconvenient, as he’s married and has four—no, five children.”

“Mike is not my best friend.”

“Gavin?”

“Who?”

“Gavin Lestrade.”

“Sherlock, Greg is a friend, but not my best friend. I’m in love with you.”

“Oh. You’re— I see. You will pretend you’re in love with me, which will soften the blow and allow her to bow out without compromising her assumed identity—”

“Sherlock, I’m not pretending I’m in love with you. I really am in love with you. I know you don’t do that—love is a dangerous distraction, sentiment on the losing side, blah, blah… That’s okay. If you’ll let me, I’d like to move back here. I not asking for—”

He doesn’t remember grabbing John and kissing him, but when his brain comes back on line, they’re lying on John’s bed, and John’s looking at him like he’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. 

John loves him.

“I won’t pretend,” he tells John. “No fake relationships. If you’re going to make love confessions like that, just casually dropping I love yous on me, you’d better be prepared for the real thing. I love you. And just so you understand me properly, only one bedroom will be needed.”

John laughs. “Well, that went better than I expected. Now I only have to break up with Mary.”

Sitting up, Sherlock grabs his phone and texts Mycroft. “The British Government can handle that, I think. Now, kiss me.”

@keirgreeneyes @totallysilvergirl @redmondcollege @lisbeth-kk @ninasnakie

[salvadorbonaparte]

Broaden Your Horizons 2024

A Non-Fiction Rec List by Salvadorbonaparte

Books

Adventures in Yiddishland: Postvernacular Language and Culture - Jeffrey Shandler

A Good Man in Evil Times: The Heroic Story of Aristides de Sousa Mendes -- The Man Who Saved the Lives of Countless Refugess in World War II - Jose-Alain Fralon, Peter Graham (trans.)

Brief Answers to the Big Questions - Stephen Hawking

Erebus: The Story of a Ship - Michael Palin

Every Word Is A Bird We Teach To Sing: Encounters with the Mysteries and Meanings of Language - Daniel Tammet

Federico Garcia Lorca: A Life - Ian Gibson

Getting to Yes: Negotiating an agreement without giving in - Roger Fisher, William Ury

I Am Malala: The Girl Who Stood Up for Education and Was Shot by the Taliban - Malala Yousafzai

Ice Ghosts: The Epic Hunt for the Lost Franklin Expedition - Paul Watson

Identity and Violence: The Illusion of Destiny - Amartya Sen

If I Understood You, Would I Have This Look on My Face?: My Adventures in the Art and Science of Relating and Communicating - Alan Alda

Imagined Communities: Reflections on the Origin and Spread of Nationalism

Iwígara: American Indian Ethnobotanical Traditions and Science

Lingo: A Language Spotter's Guide to Europe - Gaston Dorren, Alison Edwards (trans.)

Monsters in the Closet: Homosexuality and the Horror Film - Harry M. Benshoff

One River: Explorations and Discoveries in the Amazon Rainforest - Wade Davis

Watching the English: The Hidden Rules of English Behaviour - Kate Fox

What's Your Pronoun? Beyond He and She - Dennis Baron

Documentaries

Bowling for Columbine

Break It All: The History of Rock in Latin America

ReMastered: Tricky Dick and the Man in Black

She's Beautiful When She's Angry

Street Gang: How We Got to Sesame Street

Podcasts

Clear+Vivid with Alan Alda

Freaks and Psychos: The Disability in Horror Podcast

Lingthusiasm

Ologies with Alie Ward

Root of Evil: The True Story of the Hodel Family and the Black Dahlia

The Sewers of Paris

[holycatsandrabbits]

Got my author copy of Sherlock is a Girl's Name from Improbable Press!

The anthology

What would the Great Detective be like if Sherlock Holmes was a woman? That’s the question answered in Sherlock is a Girls’ Name, an anthology imagining Sherlock Holmes as female, in tall tales that follow the great detective across time and even space.

The stories in this collection, selected by long-time Sherlockian editors Narrelle M. Harris @221b-hound and @atlinmerrick, imagine Holmes in deep space, 1990s Russia, Victorian London, contemporary USA, worlds of magic and more.

Holmes’ many Watsons include ghosts, robots, a young boy who doesn’t speak, a teenage tuba player, a stranger on a plane – and that’s just to start. In each story Holmes and her Watson do what they do best: solve crimes and have adventures!

Amazing cover art by Andrea L. Farley.

My story

The Case of the Man Who Wasn’t Dead: Modern-era medium Sherlock Holmes solves the murders of the dead who contact her via her spirit guide, Jane Watson, a nurse who died in 1944.

“You don’t have to be so rude,” Jane said. The light from the kitchen window didn’t affect her, didn’t set her red curls aglow or brighten her pale skin. But she was unfailingly lovely all the same, in that white sundress, with her hair swept back from her face and her lips bright red. If Jane were alive today, Sherlock thought, she’d probably be a fan of glitter lipstick, going around looking like she’d kissed one of Dorothy’s ruby slippers.

Sherlock did attempt not to make a habit of thinking about Jane Watson kissing things.

(Sherlock has a Crush.)

DannyeChase.com ~ AO3 ~ Linktree ~ Weird Wednesday writing prompts blog ~ Resources for Writers

[soap-lady]

Holy crap! A chapter?! I thought this story was dead!

Well I finally got around and write something. I hope it was worth the wait. Thanks as always to @arylace

Worthy Opponent Ch. 27

(Two young men sit on a loveseat together. One has dyed blue hair and wears a blue button down that is unbuttoned to mid-chest and pewter chains around his neck. On his hands are fingerless gloves. He also wears a belt with attached chains that wrap around his upper thighs. His pants are dark gray leather. 

The other wears a yellow knit cap that brings out the golden undertones in his dark skin and sunglasses. He also sports a dark green sweater and tan pants. A white undershirt peeks out from under the sweater and he wears a lion pendant on a gold chain around his neck.)

<Interviewer> Hi! Could you introduce yourselves and tell us who you play and what you do in this movie?

(They quietly debate who goes first. The boy in blue fiddles with one of the chains on his pants and the boy in green gives his shoulder a squeeze. They both nod and the boy with dyed hair speaks up.)

<Luka> Um…hi, Paris. My name is Luka Couffaine and I’m playing Jack Watson in this movie. I’m also helping Allen compose the music and we and our friend Ivan are performing all the pieces an orchestra isn’t.

(Allen seems much more confident, having sat through interviews before.)

<Allen> Bonjour, Paris! Je m’appelle Allain. (A laugh is heard). Stop laughing at my accent, Couffaine. I play Jayden Spade in this movie and I’m also the principal composer. 

<Interviewer> Can you tell us anything about your character or maybe how they fit into the group?

<Luka> Well…(sits back, looking and feeling more confident now that Allen’s joke has broken the ice.)

<Luka> My character is kind of like the prodigal son. His mom left his dad because she felt he cared more about M. Holmes than his own family. She moved to America with her son and lived there for eight years.

<Interviewer> Why did Jack come back? 

<Luka> Free education. (Allen chuckles and Luka grins at him) Well, that’s part of it. Jack looks and dresses like a punk. Like punk rock, not a delinquent. But really he’s the type to come to the rescue of anyone who needs it. (Sigh) He came to the rescue of someone targeted by a gang and his mom sent him to Paris for his own safety.

<Interviewer> Sounds like Jack had a lot of…

<Allen> Culture shock?

<Interviewer> (Laughs) 

<Luka> Yeah, culture shock to deal with. He doesn’t really remember…(points off-screen) these people, except for one other character. He’s grown up hearing how the Holmes family treat the Watsons like servants and ruin his parents’ marriage. So he doesn’t like Barry at first and is pretty mistrustful of most of the others.

<Interviewer> Except one.

<Luka> Exactly. But it also gives him the advantage of having an outsider’s perspective so he can act like the audience’s surrogate. When something is strange, he can ask about it and while he’s learning, the audience gets exposition via conversation and not an info dump.

<Interviewer> Allen? Same question?

<Allen> (stretches) Jayden is basically the all-mighty janitor.

<Luka> (correcting) The all-mighty IT Guy.

<Allen> Yeah. The all-mighty IT guy. Allen is a  hacker. Specifically a White Hat hacker who is firmly on the side of good, even if he has to get his hands metaphorically dirty digging for information.

<Luka> (teasing) Jayden Spade doesn’t get a lot of screen time. And if he does, it’s because he’s on the computer, digging-

<Allen> Looking for evidence. Checking backgrounds. Trying to find the correlations and connections-

<Luka> The corkboard, pins and string guy.

<Allen> But digital. Besides (nudges Luka’s shoulder) not everyone needs recognition and being the center of attention. Jayden likes not having the spotlight on him.

<Luka> Unlike Barry. Or [redacted]

<Allen> Yeah. But that answers your question.

<Interviewer> You’re composing original music for this movie. What are some of your influences?

<Allen and Luka> Jagged Stone

<Interviewer> (laughs) Jagged Stone, huh?

<Luka> Rock and roll! Plus, he’s done music that spans many genres. He’s the Gorillaz of rock.

<Allen> Agreed

<Luka> I also like punk so Bad Brains (Allen cheers) Social Distortion, Iggy and the Stooges, The Misfits, and The Dead Kennedys.

<Allen> (makes a sweeping gesture with his hand) All of the above, plus I love vaporware and electronica, so a bit of Daft Punk. I like Mystery Skulls. On the classical side I like Mendolsson, Liszt,  and Chopin, and Holst of course. (shrug) to be honest I like lots of different genres, from jazz to Gregorian chants and…(embarrassed) Dolly Parton. I just really love the sincerity in her voice.

<Luka> Mylene was telling me about her charity work at lunch last week.

<Allen> We make a point of listening to what music was popular during the Victorian Era. We even use Victoria era instruments. We have a piano and some stringed instruments from that time. Even a portable organ.

<Interviewer> Wow. I love the attention to detail. So I heard you two have written individual themes for each character in different styles? Can we hear more about that?

<Luka> Oh, sure. Everyone has their own melody so we wanted to reflect that in the soundtrack. For instance, Barry is a piano most of the time but  when he's being too much of a Holmes there's a violin playing for that constant reminder of his family.

<Allen> (nods) Jayden has an undercurrent of synth and vaporwave with the orchestra as the most tech savvy character in the movie.

<Luka> Jack has the most modern vibe which works as he's the most modern of all the main characters, so electric guitar and heavy bass. Maybe some flutes now and then to show he has a softer side.

<Allen> [Redacted] our fighter character, the one who protects everyone has more rhythmic beats because she's a fighter. Very martial.

<Luka> Then there’s [redacted] who’s her equal and opposite and uses wind instruments or harp for those hope notes. Maybe when the team needs to be rallied.

<Allen> Lastly [redacted] has like a jazzy vibe because she's the wildcard like how jazz improvises and changes. Plus it runs the emotional gamut from giddy to soulful to energetic-

<Luka> Don’t forget sexy.

<Allen> (scoffs) No, I didn’t. I just don’t think of her that way.

<Luka> Trust me, she’s sexy.

<Allen> I really don’t notice sexy people. Just sexy music.

<Luka> And sexy, sexy technology.

(Both laugh.)

<Interviewer> (clearly impressed)  Wow. You’ve put a lot of thought and effort into your music.

<Allen> Always. Plus music adds so much to a film. There’s the music they put in action scenes to get the audience’s pulse racing, but there’s also the soft, quieter music for dramatic scenes.

<Luka> I communicate best with music. You can learn a lot about people by the music they like so giving everyone an individual theme can convey something words can’t always do.

<Allen> Not alone, anyway.

<Luka> No, not alone. 

<Interviewer> Thank you so much for taking the time to sit down with me. Final thoughts?

<Luka> See the movie.

<Allen> Buy the soundtrack!

(All laugh)

Chapter 27

Ladybug swung over buildings and raced over rooftops, only to find Mamushi and Chat Noir had beaten her there. Chat Noir, a superhero veteran, was relaxed and assessing the situation. Mamushi, the new soldier, conducted herself as such; posture straight and serpentine eyes glued to the horizon watching. The tenseness Mamushi had in her arms and shoulders telegraphed her readiness for action; fighting against the very nature of the snake. Ladybug had confidence that Mamushi would succeed but this will truly be the deciding factor. Could Mamushi adapt in a high intensity scenario and use the snake effectively? That remained to be seen. She had high hopes for Kagami, just as she had for Luka.

A sudden rush of wind kissed her cheeks and Ladybug knew that Wyvern had joined them. From her periphery she saw the dragon land and walk over to the other heroes. He nodded respectfully to everyone and the gesture was returned quickly. Mamushi acknowledged her fellow new hero with a quick nod and a small fanged smile to show there were no hard feelings about their switch; and went back to scanning. 

“Always a pleasure to see you, LB,” Chat Noir gave her a two-fingered salute and his trademark grin. There was something about Chat Noir; he seemed open and relaxed. Not that Chat was ignoring the akuma, but he looked less tense and stressed. Happy even, which caused Ladybug to smile back easily. 

“You too, Kitty.” She allowed herself a moment to return the easy smile; before duty caused her grin to fade and her expression turned serious. “So, what do we have this time?”

“On my way here I was able to hear a bit of the akuma’s monologue, and the internet pieced more of it together. She refers to herself as Miss Cupid, a champion of love who will save the prince from the traitor.” Mamushi reported, tearing her eyes from the horizon. Pulling up her sanshin she revealed the hidden screen in the back of the instrument. Reliability was on their side, as the popular social media site Chirp was showing pictures of the newest akuma and people’s eyewitness accounts. 

“Sounds like a love triangle.” Ladybug mentioned connecting the dots. So many years battling akuma, it was easy for her to see patterns as to what led them to be akumatized. 

“Oh, gross.” Chat Noir grimaces in disgust. “Man, I hate love triangles! They creep meow-t. They always have to be used in most shows nowadays too! I can never get away from it.”

“It’s lazy writing,” Wyvern agreed, “some writers don’t know how to add interpersonal conflict to characters without shoehorning in a romance. It’s the worst will they won’t they.”

Ladybug schooled her expression while she felt her cheeks warm under her mask. Ladybug and Wyvern were currently filming a movie; the script seemed to lean heavily into developing a love triangle of its own. Maybe she could talk with….no, this wasn’t Marinette time. She was at the moment Ladybug and she had a job to do. Not think and speculate on her civilian life and how weird the akuma seemed to reflect that. 

“Doesn’t matter.  This is no time for speculation. We need to come up with a plan.” Ladybug put an end to the commentary as the other three jumped into action at her command. 

They gathered together near the edge of the roof they stood on and peered over. The akuma was…incredibly beautiful. Clearly the most aesthetically pleasing akuma they’d seen in ages. Perhaps the victim had designed their own costume because Ladybug was itching to sketch it.

A champion gave the idea of a warrior or knight. This akuma filled that role. Scaled armor, where every scale was another rose petal in different hues of reds and blacks glinted in the evening lights  of Paris. The scales created a sweetheart neckline arranged to appear as a broken heart by the position of color. Carmine, scarlet, and crimson hair was arranged into a sculpted  rose that framed her face, small braids became thorns and they were arranged beautifully with smaller braided roses to make a grecian style wreath that framed her head. Her make up was haunting, red wine tones and a wet look of someone who had been crying. Dark, deep leathers protecting where scales did not cover. A deep green collar that resembled the rose’s scalloped leaves that connected to a cape that transitioned to float and curl like gentle petals. Armored thigh-high boots whose metal had rose etchings. Instead of Cupid’s bow, she had a whip at hand, filled with thorns, and what could be considered daggers at her hips looking like roses. 

“That’s her, Miss Cupid.” Mamushi nodded seeing the akuma matched the pictures they saw earlier. 

“Has Hawkmoth been quiet lately because he was taking a fashion course?” Wyvern asked curiously which made Chat Noir chuckle. 

“You might be onto something, Wyvern. That is one of the prettiest akuma’s I’ve ever seen.” Chat Noir snapped some pictures with his baton. “Gotta give his teacher a raise, or do you think he commissioned an artist to do outfits for future akumas? Either way I should show Mar–my friend later. They’re really into fashion.”

“Focus, Kitty.” Ladybug was pleased he still considered her civilian self his friend, even if they’d barely interacted all summer. “We have to help her and whoever she’s after.”

“What’s the plan, Ladybug?” Wyvern asked, turning to his leader and  seeing her in her element. Her face was calm, almost serene. Her gaze was resolute and there was a determined gleam in her eye. She reminded him of Marinette and it made him smile. Maybe he’d go see her tomorrow.

“Until we know exactly what this Miss Cupid can do, the best thing to do now is to engage lightly. Once we have an idea what powers she has we can adjust accordingly, and make a better plan.” Ladybug mentioned looking amidst the chaos and property destruction. “Keeping an eye out for the victims will also give us the advantage. If we can remove them, we could redirect the akuma to target us, minimizing the dangers civilians face.” 

“With the four of us it’s going to be easier keeping them away from shelters too. More help is always welcome.” Chat Noir added as well. 

“What about my skill set?” Mamushi asked with a bit of trepidation. 

“You have to trust your judgment. Too early and we’re constantly back at square one. Too late and things can go into chaos.” Ladybug spoke up. “Stay back and observe, and when the situation calls for it then use your ability.” 

“If I may?” Wyvern asked, interjecting himself. On Ladybug’s nod he continued to speak. “I liked to think about the saying ‘hit the right note’, or strike when the iron is hot. Trust yourself to know when it’s right and we’re here for you every step of the way. You’re a fighter, and you knew when to strike with this.” Wyvern mentioned pointing at his sword. “So do the same when you strike with that.” 

He nodded at Mamushi’s sanshin and bracelet and she smiled, giving him a small bow. “Arigato, Wyvern-san.” 

He bowed back. “Douiteshimashita.”

Chat Noir cleared his throat and they all looked at him. “So, um…” he rubbed the back of his head. “Am I on my usual distraction duty?”

Ladybug thought about it then shook her head. “Sorry, Kitty,” her tone was gentle. “I think this particular akuma might require a little…” she trailed off, looking for the right word.

Her partner shrunk in on himself a little. “Diplomacy?” he offered.

She just shrugged. “I was going to say tact, but diplomacy will do.” She softened her words with a warm smile. “You’re great at funny quips but this akuma might require a softer touch. I’m going to send Wyvern, if you don’t mind.” She looked over at the newer hero, who gave her a nod. “I want you on standby as defense, all right?”

Chat Noir smiled and winced inwardly at the hopeful look on her face. Had he bothered her so much by goofing off and not taking akuma seriously? She seemed so capable all the time he never even thought about her needing him as much more than comedy relief. The thought that they could have defeated past akuma faster if he’d taken his job seriously made him feel ashamed.

He gave her his usual cocky grin. “Always ready to protect and serve with you, milady. And our talented newcomers, naturally,” he gave a bow.

Ladybug giggled at him and his feeling of shame passed. “I knew I could count on you, my kitty.” She nodded at Wyvern. “Go for it, Wyvern. We’ll follow your lead.”

He nodded. “You can count on me too, Ladybug.” He smiled at Chat and Mamushi and leaped off the building, landing a little bit away from the akuma. He wanted to approach her slowly, cautiously, and a bit out of reach of her whip.

His first instinct was to reach for the lyre. He grasped for it at his side and it wasn’t there. That’s right, he was Wyvern, not Viperion any more. He felt a rush of anger at Hawk Moth and his akuma-of-the-week (Chloe, his memory provided) for robbing him of the hero he used to be. Damn emotional terrorist and his megalomaniacal-

He shook his head. That wasn’t helping. Besides, he didn’t need an instrument to make music; he still had his voice.

Wyvern began to hum “Grace Kelly” and took a few steps closer, only to be stopped by a whip crack near his feet. 

“Back off!” The strangely beautiful akuma glared at him. “Stay away from me!”

Wyvern stepped back a few steps. “Is this better?”  He smiled kindly and tried to listen to her heart song. It was being smothered by feelings of anger and betrayal and Hawkmoth’s miasma but he could hear it faintly.

“Look,” he tried again, “I know you’ve been hurt. I don’t know how or who but I’m here to listen to you. I want to help if you want me to. We could start with what happened to make you feel this way. Did you have a bad day at school? Parents too harsh?” When they didn’t react he suggested, “fight with a friend?”

That got a reaction.  “Marie is not my friend!” The thorn whip lashed out and he dodged. The akuma continued. “She pretended to be my friend and then used everything I told her to steal Laurent from me!”

“Um, I don’t think you can steal people. If this boy wanted someone else, that’s not your fault.” Wyvern tried to keep his voice soothing. “But if this girl knew you liked him and went after him anyway, that’s not right. You have a right to be angry and even confront her but attacking people won’t make you feel better long term.” He spoke from experience. “Trust me. When the power wears off all your problems are still there and you’re left with no memory of what you did or said.”

The akuma lowered the whip a fraction. She was listening to what he had to say.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Wyvern chuckled and gave the akuma a little wave. “I didn’t introduce myself. I’m a little new. My name is Wyvern.” He struck a pose. “What’s yours?”

The akuma blinked in confusion. “I’m-I’m Miss Cupid.”

He gave her a bow. “It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Miss Cupid, even under these circumstances.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “Now, tell me more about Laurent and Marie. How long have you liked him? How long have you known Marie? How did she betray you?” He dared to take a half step in her direction. “We can talk about that if you want. Or you can talk and I’ll just listen. We don’t even have to talk about this at all. You can tell me about your hobbies. Or maybe have a little impromptu jam session but with vocals instead of instruments.”

The whip lowered another inch. “What makes you think I’m a singer?” 

Her voice sounded a little less angry than it had been and she hadn’t attacked him in awhile. “Well, with a costume like yours,” he pointed at her head, then down her armor, “you clearly have a strong sense of self and creative talent. Why not a singer as well as an artist?”

Miss Cupid blushed. “Well, there’s so many different ways to express yourself. All kinds of media too.”

Wyvern nodded. “I know! I’m a musician but I have a friend who’s a singer. Some other friends are artists. Like one’s into street art and another is into watercolors.” He smiled again. “What about you?”

“Well, I liked to sculpt.” Miss Cupid’s tone was modest. “I think Theo Barbot’s really talented and it’s cool that the city picked him to create the Ladybug and Chat Noir statue. He’s only a few years older than me!”

Ladybug smiled at Chat Noir, who grinned back. The diplomacy was working! Wyvern had found common ground with the akuma and the two of them were happily chatting about sculpting techniques. Perhaps they could convince the akuma to give up willingly and end this encounter before it became a fight.

Mamushi on the other hand had her eyes locked on the akuma. Only she seemed to notice the fine tremors in the akuma’s hands and arms. Clearly Hawk Moth was attempting to regain control of his victim. Wyvern was getting too close to the akuma but she didn’t want to warn him and give away her position. Was now the moment for Second Chance?

Yes. Yes it was. If the akuma became angry, Wyvern was within her attack radius. She would trust her instincts; she had been honing them since early childhood and they were currently screaming at her that Wyvern was in danger.

Decision made, Mamushi slid the snake head on her bracelet from right to left and whispered “Second Chance.”

There was a brief flash and then she turned her attention back to the akuma just in time to see the familiar outline of a butterfly on the akuma’s face.

Deep underground Hawk Moth was feeling angry and stymied. Those cursed children were yet again distracting his akuma from doing battle with the Heroes of Paris! Last time he could not risk Chloe Bourgeois dying and alienating her father. This time he had no such compunction.

Miss Cupid! That hero is trying to distract you! He doesn’t want to help you, otherwise he’d be helping you track down the traitor who backstabbed you!

To her credit, the girl behind the akuma tried to fight him off but he poured his power into her head until she was under his control again. Really, teenagers had such fragile restraint when it came to matters of the heart.

“No!” Miss Cupid yelled, startling Wyvern and causing him to backpedal. “You’re distracting me! I have to save Laurent!” She raised her whip but her expression was almost compassionate. “This is your last chance. Help me, or get out of my way. Otherwise,” her hand holding the whip might have been shaking but her expression was determined. “I’ll have to use this on you.”

Wyvern raised his hands in surrender. “Look, I don’t want to hurt you…”

As soon as the words were out his mouth, Miss Cupid struck out. The whip unfurled and hit him across the face, causing the new Dragon to bleed. The three other heroes covered their mouths so the akuma couldn’t hear them, eyes wide with shock. They’d gone from feeling like a fight could have been avoided to watching as their friend was hit because they’d misread the akuma.

Miss Cupid smirked as Wyvern fell to the ground, tears forming in his eyes.

“Now let’s see how you feel about-” she began to gloat but he interrupted her.

“I’ve been waiting forever for her to get over him, for her heart to be free but she might be falling for him,” his voice was bitter then distraught. “But, do I have the right to be angry at her? I don't own her, I’m not entitled to her affection just because she’s finally over her first love.”

Wyvern looked up at Miss Cupid without really seeing her. “Is it wrong to want her to love me? I know I should be happy with just her friendship and he clearly cares about her. What if she’d be happier without me? What if he hurts her and I’m not there to help?”

The akuma was at a loss for words and even with Hawk Moth screaming in her ear she didn’t try to strike the hero again. In fact, she coiled her weapon and tucked it away.

She patted Wyvern’s hair, who continued to babble about his feelings for a girl and his worry about losing her to someone else and his growing possible feelings for another. “I was wrong about you,” she told him gently. “You do know how I feel. I promise I’ll come back and help. Stay here.” She leapt off the roof and renewed her search for Laurent and Marie.

Mamushi reset time, this time Ladybug intercepted the blow meant for Wyvern and began to cry.

“What’s wrong with me?!” she sobbed.

Wyvern felt an odd rush of protectiveness for Ladybug, even if he knew she could take care of herself. There was something about her heart song that seemed so familiar…

He was torn between comforting his team leader and yelling at her attacker when Ladybug spoke again.

“I just got over this guy who didn’t like me like that and I found a guy who clearly cares about me as a person. I know he’s interested. He’s also sweet and fun and cool and there for me…” she sighed wistfully. “But there’s also this other guy. I’m not sure if he really cares or if he’s projecting. Maybe I’m just using him as a substitute but…there’s just something about him. On the other hand…the first guy is just wonderful. I know he would never deliberately hurt me…and…am I treating him like he’s the safe option? He deserves so much more than that. He’s talented and wise…his lips look so kissable.” Her smile turned dreamy.

Miss Cupid shook her head violently and Wyvern was sure Hawk Moth wanted her to grab Ladybug’s earrings but to her credit, the akuma seemed reluctant to take advantage of another girl’s emotional distress. She gave Ladybug a shoulder pat.

“The fact you’re thinking of both of their feelings says a lot about you,” Miss Cupid told the distressed girl. I promise I’ll come back and help. Stay here.” She leapt off the roof and renewed her search for Laurent and Marie.

Chat Noir felt conflicted. His instincts told him to intervene but he was unsure about what to do; he was no strategist. He wondered if he should ignore Ladybug in order to save her from the akuma’s power.

Mamushi, on the other hand, was learning more than she ever wanted to know about her teammates’ romantic conflicts.

“Second chance,” she whispered and time reset itself again.

*****

Ladybug, Chat Noir, Wyvern and Mamushi all stood on the edge of a building looking down on the akuma, who seemed angry at being stymied but unsure whether to attack because no one was attacking her. 

Wyvern jumped down to the edge of the building the akuma was perching on and then stopped. He felt confused; should he confront or attack the akuma as Ryuuko would have or should he hold himself back as if he were still Viperion.

Ladybug charged two steps forward and had to stop herself from leaping towards Wyvern. “What are you doing?!” she screamed. “Use your magic!”

That might have been the wrong thing to say. She was so worried about Vi-Wyvern she hadn’t realized or had forgotten the akuma could hear her.

Miss Cupid recovered from her indecision and turned angry. “Traitor!” she shrieked at the hero, who had just realized how out of his depth he was. She raised her whip. “You’re not here to help me! You’re just like Laurent and Marie! All you want to do is play with my heart and laugh at me behind my back!” She posed with the whip raised above her head. “Well I’m Miss Cupid now and no one will ever be able to hurt me again!”

She twirled the whip and it wrapped itself around Wyvern’s body. Before he could react she picked him up and swung him into the side of a building.

The other heroes were crying out to Wyvern, asking if he was all right. He couldn’t focus on defending himself, much less attacking. He was still in the old Vyperion headspace; holding back instead of stepping up. It was very disorienting, but could be the possible concussion talking.

Ladybug was doing everything she could not to panic. The plan had gone to crap, Wyvern forgot he wasn’t Viperion any more and hesitated when he should have used one of his elemental powers. Mamushi went to reach for her sword and found an instrument instead. She stepped forward to defend Wyvern but had herself held back by Chat Noir. “Second chance, remember?” he whispered before she could protest.

She reached for her bracelet but before she could activate it, Ladybug threw her yo-yo in the air and screamed, “Lucky charm!” before a flash of pink light and a flurry of ladybugs dropped an item into her waiting hands.

Mamushi was about to try and trigger her bracelet but she paused to stare at the summoned item in Ladybug’s hands. She blinked in surprise.

“Is that…a stocking cap?” she asked, unsure of why Ladybug’s powers would have brought her something so impractical.

Chat Noir almost tried to come up with a pun or a joke but didn’t think Mamushi would appreciate it like Ladybug. He shrugged. “It is, but I’m sure in milady’s mind, it’s only the first step in a brilliant plan. Right, milady?” He turned to his partner.

He tried to be cheerful and encouraging, giving his partner his usual faith so she wouldn’t think he was concerned.  Ladybug looked worried and unsure, something she hadn’t looked since the first day they had their powers. It was a little…disquieting. She had to have a plan! She always did!

To his relief, the nervous expression faded and her usual determination came back. He could tell by the way she looked at the objects around her and the squint in her eyes that she was coming up with a plan.

She began to spin her yo-yo to prepare an attack. “Let’s switch it up a little bit.” She looked at Chat Noir over her shoulder. “There’s a few things I want you and Mamushi to gather up for me while I distract the akuma. I know that’s not how we usually do things,” she spoke up before Chat Noir could, “but our original plan kind of went off the rails so I’m just going to wing it.”

She saw the look of uncertainty in his eyes. She refused to look at Wyvern. “Trust me,” she asked softly.

Chat Noir did his best to grin. “Always. Just tell us what you need us to do,” he spoke up before Mamushi could. She managed a nod. The heat of battle was not the best time to question the plan.

Ladybug sighed in relief and managed a confident smile. She turned her attention back to the akuma. “We don’t have much time. I’ll-”

An arrow whizzed past her, narrowly missing her and hitting the akuma. She screeched in offense,  but no real injury, yet.

Ladybug approached the edge of the building to look and see if the akuma was badly harmed only to have a figure dive down and nearly knock her off-balance with its wings.

*****

Morrigan swooped towards the akuma, making a point to buzz Ladybug on the way. Her former idol squawked  in surprise as she passed her. She hoped she scared the little goody good, even if she had no intention to hurt her. She wasn’t nice, but she was good. Mostly.

The archer didn’t give the akuma time to react, just kicked her in the stomach. The akuma hadn’t been prepared for such a brutal physical attack and went down without a fight.

Forgotten near the wall, Wyvern struggled to his feet. Miss Cupid was on the ground, wailing in pain and cursing at her attacker. He felt like a fool; his first akuma with his new kwami and he’d gone down in thirty seconds. He hoped he didn’t end up on VousTube.

He checked to make sure he still had his sword and prepared to jump back in the fray. He was contemplating the ethics of attacking a prone opponent when someone in black and gold armor with a lion shaped helmet jumped in front of him. He recognized them. Percival, one of the Knights. He opened his mouth to speak but the armored figure ignored him.

“I’ve got this,”Percival called over his shoulder and drew his sword.

Annoyed at being taken out of the fight so easily Wyvern also drew his sword but Percival’s sword was longer and he cut Miss Cupid’s whip in half while Wyvern swung on air.

Percival shrugged at Wyvern. “Sorry,” he told him and looked back just in time to see the akuma’s whip had just reformed itself and Miss Cupid had almost  pulled herself back up.

Feeling useless Wyvern thought the smart thing to do was to stop having a sword measuring contest with a stranger and go find Ladybug and regroup.

*****

I’m beginning to wonder if helping fight this akuma was a good idea. Galahad thought as he stood to the side and watched his Knights fight with Hawk Moth’s latest victim. Morrigan had taken the initiative and attacked Miss Cupid first, knocking her prone. Percival had followed up with an attack that had temporarily destroyed the akuma’s weapon and was keeping her on the defensive so she couldn’t counterattack.

And now what?  

As the leader of sorts, he needed to coordinate the efforts of the Knights. Tristan and Isolde were working on crowd control and coordinating any needed rescue efforts with the police. Morrigan and Percival were handling offense and defense respectively. Everything seems under control at the moment. Perhaps it would be a good time to head over to Ladybug and ask if she’d located the akuma yet. He was relatively sure she’d already summoned her Lucky Charm and was probably working out a plan. He touched his face as he remembered when he first met. Her ability to strategize was as good as her right cross.

Galahad was just congratulating himself on his willingness to share the spotlight when a dark blur collided with him and knocked him off the roof and into a dumpster.

The dumpster clanged as the two heroes hit the side of the dumpster, The waste receptacle rocked back and forth with the impact but did not tip over. Galahad took the impact especially hard. Felix’s face screwed up with disgust. The smell of rancid food, cleaning products, and dirty diapers hit his nose so hard he felt nauseous.

“Get off of me, you moron!” He pushed the other hero away and scrambled to his feet before grabbing the rim of the dumpster and hauling himself out.

Chat Noir skittered out after him, looking defensive and slightly apologetic. “Hey! I thought you were going to attack us like you attacked the akuma; violently and without warning.” Chat Noir sniffed himself and then recoiled. “Trust me. Smelling like Eau de Ordures was not on my agenda tonight.”

The cat superhero shook his head to clear it and looked at the other hero. “I’m surprised. I thought you and the rest of the Round Table preferred to wait and see when it came to fighting akuma. I didn’t expect you to actually get your hands dirty.” He smirked as he wrinkled his nose. “Or get your armor dirty.”

Galahad reminded himself to stay calm. Paris needed all the heroes it could get to defeat Hawkmoth. That meant his and Ladybug’s teams had to work together and cooperation required tact and diplomacy. He doubted Ladybug would believe he was there to help if he suddenly punched Chat Noir in the face.

He faked a wide condescending smile. “The four of you looked like you were in over your head fighting an akuma that was barely attacking.” His smile widened as Chat Noir looked angry at the implied incompetence. “What kind of heroes would we be if we didn’t come to the aid of those in need?”

Chat Noir extended his baton with a growl but before Galahad thought he was going to be on the news for brawling with one of the defenders of Paris, Chat Noir just said, “I’m sure Ladybug has figured out a plan by now. Follow me.”

Chat Noir used his weapon to launch himself into the air towards his partner. Once he landed he leaned over the rooftop as if expecting the other hero to follow him. 

Galahad shrugged then unfurled his wings. He gave one mighty flap then was airborne, soaring towards the rooftop the other heroes were perched on. He landed with a soft crunch of metal on gravel and carefully stayed downwind from the heroine. “Apologies for the chaotic arrival,”he told her and desperately wished they weren’t meeting as superheroes while he smelled like a landfill. He held a fist over his chest and struck a pose. “My name is Galahad,” he pointed at his team.  “We call ourselves The Knights of the Round Table.” He loved the name but it sounded so silly when he said it to other people. “We are here to help you defeat this akuma. How can we help?”

Galahad turned his head and looked at where Morrigan and Percival were fighting Miss Cupid. He narrowed his gaze but still couldn’t see what she saw. There was no way in Hell he would admit that he couldn’t see what she saw. He didn’t want to look like a fool (again) by admitting to a shortcoming. “What makes you say that?”

“She’s naturally observant and being Ladybug has helped her hone that.” The dragon themed hero approached his leader and stood beside her. He looked Galahad up and down and even though his nose wrinkled his gaze was appreciative. Something about him reminded Galahad of…someone. It didn’t matter now. 

Ladybug beamed at Wyvern and then looked seriously at Galahad “What he said.” 

Part of her wanted to argue with him; ask why they’d never helped before. Another part wanted to demand they leave but she wouldn’t. Hawk Moth had exposed all of her temporary allies and if it hadn’t been for Master Fu’s sacrifice he would have won. Well, Chloe did most of the hard work and they had been lucky the former Queen Bee hadn’t really wanted to fight them. She took her bully’s reluctance as a possible sign there was some good left in her but she wouldn’t take the chance.

Ladybug decided to be cautiously optimistic. “Thank you for your help, Galahad.” She decided the best thing to do would be to hurry and cleanse the akuma so she could get the victim home quickly. “I have an idea but I need someone to distract the akuma so I can implement my plan.” She looked around for her partner but he was deliberately avoiding her. “Usually I’d ask  Chat Noir…”

“If…I may interrupt..” Mamushi gave into the impulse to speak. She was sure she was violating some sort of tradition but she thought what she had to say was important.

Ladybug tried not to act surprised. “Go ahead, Mamushi.”

She nodded. “I…noticed something about Miss Cupid’s abilities.” She didn’t think it was a good idea to mention her powers in front of strangers, potential allies or not. 

Ladybug nodded back to show she understood, eyes widening slightly. “Go on.”

Mamushi felt slightly embarrassed as she tried to explain without revealing what she saw. “Miss Cupid uses her whip to make her victims reveal any unrequited feelings,especially if they are…torn between two people. They seem torn by indecision and unable to defend themselves.”

Ladybug froze in dismay as Mamushi looked her directly in the eye and inclined her head in agreement. Ladybug wanted to ask what exactly Kagami saw but now was not the time. “So anyone who approaches her with any sort of turmoil in their…private lives won’t be able to resist her powers.”

That meant she and Wyvern couldn’t approach her. What about Mamushi or Chat? They seemed stable. Chat seemed over her and she didn’t think Mamushi had any lingering remorse about taking Adrien from Marinette, nor should she. Still, would any past conflicts make them vulnerable?

“So, the best person to fight this akuma is someone who has no romantic entanglements or regrets? Ever?”  Galahad interrupted.  He thought for a moment and then said. “I know just the guy!”

Before Ladybug or anyone could protest, he touched his ear and said, “Hey, Percival? Galahad. Listen, Ladybug needs you to distract the akuma so she can break the akumatized object. Maybe you can tie her up with her own whip instead of cutting it this time? Yeah, you would have done it earlier if you'd thought of it. No problem.”

He saw everyone staring at him and said, “Bluetooth.”

Chat Noir got a little closer as he stared. “Why have we never thought of that?”

Ladybug just said “Later” and looked at Galahad. “I’m counting on you.”

He nodded. “Just be ready to go with your plan when Percival does his part.”

He’d never talked to her this long and he sure as hell hadn’t been as close. Not since their first meeting as his civilian self.  It was embarrassing that this was their formal introduction as heroes and he smelled like a sewer.

Her body language was stiff and she almost vibrated with nervous energy. He couldn’t tell if it was because she couldn’t stand to be around him or she was worried that her plan wasn’t going well.

Galahad did his best to look calm and professional but he couldn’t resist letting his eyes roam over her. The way she carried herself made her seem taller than she really was and her eyes betrayed no fear. He felt as if he were looking at…no. Better not to think about her, he was trying to look professional.

He glanced at the new hero who had replaced Ryuuko to distract himself. That didn’t help. Wyvern was tall and lean and a strange oasis of calm with all the chaos around him. Galahad felt better just looking at him.

He tore his eyes away and looked at Percival. He had to be ready to act once the akuma had been subdued.

*****

Percival considered himself a pacifist, his love of D&D notwithstanding, and never expected to find himself in the middle of combat. It helped to think of himself in a monster encounter where his team had rolled low initiative.

Miss Cupid had not taken getting attacked by multiple foes well and was lashing out blindly. She was getting sloppy but also unpredictable. Percival noticed the purple butterfly appear over the akuma’s eyes. Hawk Moth must be becoming frustrated too. Good. He hoped the idiot in the gimp suit enjoyed being outnumbered.

He watched Morrigan wind the akuma up. She was screaming and lashing her whip blindly at his teammate, who only taunted her more.He watched Morrigan fight, weaving in and out of the akuma’s reach. Morrigan clearly enjoyed fighting; perhaps it gave her something to channel her anger and hostility into. He considered asking her about therapy. Well, not now. Maybe after the movie was done.

Percival frowned and took a deep breath as he made a decision. Perhaps it was time he did something impulsive.

*****

Morrigan had done a good job of keeping the akuma distracted so far but Galahad, or hell, Ladybug, or whoever-the-hell needed to plan and decide a course of action so they could defeat the akuma and go to bed. They were filming all day tomorrow and she needed her beauty sleep. So did everyone else and makeup could only do so much.

“Get away from me!” Miss Cupid yelled at her. The akuma’s movements were beginning to slow. She was getting tired but they couldn’t rely on wearing her down. It helped. “You don’t understand! Laurent needs to be rescued! Marie is fooling him!”

Ugh. This again. She was beginning to think Allen was right about sex and romance. It had never done her any good. “So what?! Why are you trying so hard to help a guy who clearly doesn’t care?”

Miss Cupid stopped attacking and just stared at her. “What?! But…but she’s fooling him! She’s going to hurt him!”

The butterfly mask came up and both young women ignored him. Morrigan decided to try a little common sense. It might work where all that touchy feely crap failed. 

She took a step closer. “Did you ever think that he’s not being fooled? Maybe this guy knows exactly what this girl is really like and doesn’t care. He’s going in with his eyes open and if he gets hurt,” Morrigan shrugged. “Then he has it coming and you’re concerned about him for nothing.”  She smirked. “It would serve him right if he came crawling back to you, telling you were right and you told him to piss off.”

Miss Cupid just stared. “Are…are you sure you’re a hero?”

Morrigan shrugged. “Yeah. I’m a hero. I’ve got the armor and everything.” She glanced over at the other rooftop where she was sure her former idol was watching her and silently judging. Whatever.  “But unlike some heroes I’m not gonna baby your feelings and spout some useless namby pamby crap. I’m gonna tell you shit that will actually help, not just make you feel better.

Miss Cupid nodded despite herself and let the whip drop slightly. “Um…okay.”

“Take it from me,” Morrigan continued, “neither of those jerks are worth getting mad about, much less wrecking Paris. Some people can’t be, or don’t wanna be helped so you should just cut them off. Move on.” She’d stopped trying to protect Adrien and their friendship was a lot healthier for it. “Carrying around a bunch of feelings for a guy too oblivious, or pretending to be oblivious is a waste of time. Being friends with a leech isn’t worth it and now that you know what she really is you’re better off cutting the little parasite out of your life. Forget ‘em. Besides,” Morrigan continued, “you can’t force someone to like you if they don’t,” she knew from years of experience with Adrien and in a way, her mother. “No one is entitled to anyone’s affections if that person doesn’t like you like that.”

There was a smattering of applause and Morrigan felt proud. It sounded like something Percival would have said. She’d done it again! Maybe. She wasn’t good at tact or empathy but she knew what it was like to tie oneself in knots trying to earn the affection of someone who didn’t care and didn’t deserve it.

It should have worked. Under any other circumstances the akuma could have been persuaded to listen to reason and give up her object willingly. It had worked the last time Chloe had tried this and there had been no casualties or even property damage.

Well, the difference was last time she had gotten to the akuma before she had been agitated and appealed to her vanity and natural poise. She had been willing to listen to reason and was persuaded to stand  down.

Unfortunately Hawk Moth had learned from his mistakes and deliberately kept his victim agitated. Wyvern had tried and failed to talk her down so she was already wary. Then she had attacked and Percival and Galahad helped surround her. Miss Cupid was frustrated, harassed and probably tired. She didn’t take much to snap.

She looked undecided and for a second Morrigan had hope. “No!” she burst out. “You’re not going to keep me from having my revenge!” She raised her whip again. “You’re right about one thing; they’re both scum and deserve to pay!”

Morrigan tried one last time. Dammit, it had all gone so wrong so fast! “But-”

“No!” Miss Cupid shot back. She raised the whip above her head and let it uncoil. She hesitated. “You have five seconds to get out of my way or you’re going down too!”

“I’m trying to help you!” Morrigan protested.

Miss Cupid laughed bitterly. “Sure you are.” Her eyes narrowed and her lips thinned as she brought her arm back. “Just like them.”

There was a blur of black and gold, then suddenly Percival was standing between them with the whip wrapped around his wrist. He shook his head at the akuma. “I don’t blame you for being upset but trying to whip someone who just wants to help is not a good look.”

Miss Cupid was so startled the whip fell away from the Knight’s wrist and she nearly dropped it. “It doesn’t work on you?” Her eyes darted all around as if trying to find a clue. “How is that possible?!”

Percival shrugged. “Your power only affects people with complicated love lives, right? Love triangles?” He smiled. “I’m asexual so I don’t have those kinds of complications to worry about.”

The akuma sighed, ignoring the butterfly mask that appeared. “That must be nice. No mixed signals, no heartbreak.”

He nodded. “For me? Yeah. Sometimes I have to worry about accidentally sending signals without meaning to. And sometimes it can be lonely when I wanna hang out but all or most of my friends are off canoodling somewhere but…” he thought about it. “I enjoy my life. It’s taken me a while to understand that being different isn’t bad or broken but I’m happy with my life.”

Miss Cupid gave him a sheepish grin. “Need anyone to hang with?”

He smiled. “If you still want to after you’ve been de-akumatized, I’m Percival#777 on Quiscord.”

Morrigan felt the tension in her shoulders ease and thought the akuma was about to hand her object over when a whirr of black and red stuffed something over Miss Cupid’s head.

“Hey!” came the akuma’s muffled shout.

Ladybug grabbed the earrings from Miss Cupid’s ears and crushed them until a black and purple butterfly flew out.

“No evil doing for you, little akuma!” Ladybug proclaimed before doing her usual spiel.

The hero of Paris gently pried the skullcap off Miss Cupid before throwing it into the air. “Miraculous Ladybug!”

The loveliness of ladybugs flew through the city and restored the damage, returning Miss Cupid to herself as Percival helped her to her feet.

She blinked in surprise. “I was akumatized, wasn’t I?”

The heroes nodded.

The girl looked embarrassed. “I’m sorry. I was just too upset about Laurent and Marie-!” She broke off and gave Ladybug an awkward smile. “Thank you for saving me.”

Morrigan was just about to intervene and say the Knights did all the dirty work when Ladybug broke out into a nervous smile. “No, I just purified the akuma.” She pointed from Morrigan to Percival. “The Knights did the hard part. They saved you.”

Morrigan and Percival stood a little straighter. Morrigan was reluctant to speak. She didn’t want Ladybug to recognize her voice.

Percival came to her rescue. “No thanks needed.” He gave her an embarrassed wave. “Saving damsels is just part of the job, Miss…?”

The former akuma gave him a smile and a half-curtsey. “Dumont. Dominique Dumont. Thank you for saving me…?”

He bowed. “Call me Percival, of the Knights of the Round Table.” He indicated Morrigan. “And this is one of my comrades, Morrigan.” Morrigan nodded. “You might have heard of us.”

“I have!” Dominique clutched her hands to her chest. “On the Muses Podcast. It’s so wonderful to meet you!”

Morrigan and Percival agreed to pose for a picture when Tristan and Isolde brought over a shamefaced couple.

“Dominique?” the young woman said.

“Domie, we’re so sorry.” The young man looked upset. 

“We never meant to hurt you,” the young woman was sorrowful. “Please.”

The girl named Dominique looked from one to the other. “You know, it was wrong to let my anger turn me into an akuma.”

The couple smiled at each other, thinking they were about to be forgiven.

“But I think it's better that we’re no longer friends. Having feelings for each other is one thing, hiding your relationship behind my back and not being honest is another. Both of you can piss off.” As they gasped in surprise and offense Dominique turned to Percival. “Could you fly me home? Maybe we can talk on the way. I don’t suppose you play tabletop games, do you? I’ve been playing Call of Cthulhu.”

Percival perked up. “I’ve been wanting to try it. You can tell me about it on the way.”

He offered her his arm and off they flew.

Her former friends were still staring up at her, gaping when Tristan decided to break the awkward silence. “Let’s get you home,” he said.

With that, he grabbed Laurent and Isolde grabbed Marie. With a jump they were off.

Ladybug twisted her hands together and addressed Morrigan. “I’m sorry. I should have let Percival handle things.”

Morrigan just shrugged. She hoped Ladybug just assumed she was shy or mute. Or rude.

Wyvern overcame his indecision and landed beside Ladybug. “You’re two teams who aren’t used to working together,” he soothed. “I’m sure once you get your dynamics worked out, it'll all be fine.”

Galahad took a deep breath and decided to have what he hoped was a friendly chat with the leader of Paris’ heroes. “Let’s start again. My name is Galahad, leader of the Knights of the Round Table.” 

His first instinct was to go in for a handshake but Ladybug tensed when he extended his hand. She wasn’t ready to trust him yet and with his past behavior he understood. He turned it into a sweeping bow instead. “It’s a pleasure to assist the Heroes of Paris.” At least the Ladybug Cure had removed the smell of garbage.

“Hello, Galahad. I’ve seen you introduced on social media.” She looked at her partner. “You know Chat Noir.” The cat hero gave him a grin and a salute.

The two unfamiliar heroes looked at him, the young man with curiosity, the young lady with suspicion. “These are our new heroes. Wyvern-” the dragon hero nodded. “And Mamushi.” The snake hero didn’t bother with a nod. Her eyes narrowed at him in warning.

“Ladybug nodded curtly and her team surrounded her protectively like a brood of chicks while Morrigan flanked him.

“Thank you. It’s nice to formally meet you,” her tone was properly formal but her eyes were glacial. “You’ll have to understand that I’m feeling a little skeptical towards you. Why wait until now to introduce yourself when you’ve all been active for weeks?” She cocked her hip and crossed her hands over her chest. “ Why didn’t you speak to us when we tried to reach out to you?”

There was something about her commanding stance and regal tone that made him…not now. He glanced at Wyvern, who kept glancing back at him. He looked over at Mamushi, who seemed to want to skewer him with something.

Galahad started to rub the back of his neck then realized it made him look like Adrien. He dropped his hand and looked at Ladybug with an expression he hoped was sheepish and apologetic.

“We’re…new. Both to hero work and Paris itself. We thought we were doing a good thing by helping with crowd control and staying out of akuma battles. But now I see that wasn’t the right way to go about things.” He shrugged. “Sorry about that. We’ll do better in Future.”

“Does that mean you wish to join us? Become one of the Heroes of Paris?” Mamushi spoke up and only the slight widening of Ladybug’s eyes revealed it hadn’t been her idea.

Morrigan shook her head violently and Galahad declined. “The Knights prefer to stay an independent agency but we’re more than happy to team up for akuma or other emergencies.” He looked over at his teammate for confirmation but she just gave him a tiny nod and a half-shrug.

Galahad took a half-step towards his counterpart then stopped. “If you’d like, we could coordinate when we could do joint patrols or which areas of the city we could patrol on alternating days or something.”

He’d burst into her city without permission or etiquette observed and he was making the offer out of courtesy and a bit of guilt. The last thing he wanted was to spark a turf war with Ladybug. Hawk Arse would be delighted and he’d look like a git.

Her expression still looked distrustful but at least she wasn’t outright hostile. Mamushi might have still wanted to chop his head off but her leader would call her off. Probably.

“We’ll see,” was all Ladybug would say.

Chat Noir looked from his partner to the Knight who’d fallen in a dumpster with him. “Hey! That’s a good idea!”  He was a little louder and more cheerful than usual, but that could be because he was afraid Ladybug would attack a potential ally if they weren’t careful. Her, or Mamushi.

“Uh…” Chat Noir thought it over. “We’re usually pretty busy during the week but I’m sure M’Lady could find time to talk to you…” He frowned and scrolled through his staff. His face cleared. “Ah! Ladybug can meet you on the E- I mean…L’Arc de Triomphe on Saturday at 22:00.”

Galahad looked at Ladybug, who nodded. “Sounds lovely.” They had more than worn out their welcome and he didn’t want to test the limits of Ladybug’s or her team’s patience. “Morrigan and I are off. Good evening.” He nodded and with a glance at the disguised Chloe, they unfurled their wings and were off.

Wyvern sighed as he watched them fly away until they were no longer visible. “I have to admit, I’m jealous of the wings.”

Mamushi shook her head as what she had been dying to say burst out. “Tell me you don’t trust them-”

Ladybug sighed. “I don’t think I do. Not entirely.” She sighed. “The other three seem like they really want to help people but I’m not sure Galahad and Morrigan don’t have a hidden agenda.”

“Or they’re really paranoid and untrusting too,” Chat Noir teased and then turned serious. “This isn’t the first time we’ve been fooled by someone claiming to be a new hero. I don’t blame you for being careful but don’t push away potential new friends.”

“Chat Noir makes a good point,” Wyvern agreed. He looked at Ladybug and then the team. “Let’s welcome their help, but don't give our secrets away.”

Everyone nodded and Mamushi fell silent. Chat Noir was the first to notice. “Hey, Mamushi? You okay?”

The new Snake hero sighed and looked down as if ashamed. “Forgive me, Ladybug. I…” she looked pained and sad. “I proved unworthy of the faith you placed in me by giving me a new Miraculous.  I did not use the Snake properly. If it were not for those Knights,” her fists clenched and she looked angry. Not so much for the interference but because she needed to be rescued at all. “We would have failed.”

Both Ladybug and Chat Noir opened their mouths to assure her she was wrong but Wyvern beat them to it. “It wasn’t just you. I messed up too.” He gently pushed Chat Noir aside and put a reassuring hand on Mamushi’s shoulder. “I failed too. I kept thinking I was still Viperion and that messed me up. I’m not used to being first in a fight.” His smile was kind.

Mamushi’s smile was rueful. “Nor am I being the one to hesitate.”

Wyvern gave her another smile and a half-hug. “I guess we need more practice.”

She nodded and Ladybug’s head shot up. “Yes! You do!” She looked excited and her smile dimmed. “But not with me and Chat.” She looked at Mamushi, then Wyvern. “That was my mistake. You didn’t need to practice with experienced heroes because you are experienced heroes.”  She maneuvered her way in between Mamushi and Wyvern and gave them both a half-hug.

Ladybug grinned as the idea occurred to her. “You need to practice with heroes who are experienced with the Snake and the Dragon. You need to practice with each other!”

Wyvern looked at Mamushi. “I think she has a good point.” He gave the new Snake a smile. “Wanna be practice buddies?”

“I must rearrange my schedule and find a clever way to fool Mother.”  The former Dragon looked serious as she planned and then gave her new partner a mischievous grin. “I’m sure I’ll come up with something and let you know via our Communicators.

“Looks like everything worked out, M’Lady. Even though things got a little hairy for a few minutes there.” He waited for his partner to groan and then held out his fist while looking at three of his fellow heroes.

They all knew just what to do. Three other fists came flying out.

“Pound it!”

With a shared laugh and some quick goodbyes, Team Miraculous made their separate ways home. Ladybug was still thinking about the encounter with the Knights and it meant for team dynamics in the future. Would Galahad want to take over as leader and muscle her out? She hoped she was just being paranoid and insecure.

Galahad laid awake for at least an hour before finally drifting off. He’d introduced himself properly to Team Miraculous. (Griff was very pleased) but couldn’t stop thinking of the glint of steel in her eyes, her determination, or Wyvern’s quiet support and calm demeanor.

…

He had a type or two, didn’t he?

[swissmissficrecs]

Johnlock fics I read in 2023

This is everything I read in the Sherlock Holmes fandom last year that made it into my bookmarks. So while I may not have read enough to make a selected "best of" list, consider these the ones that made it past all my internal selection criteria and are deserving of a spotlight. A few of these were completed prior to 2023.

A Case of You by Silvergirl (17K, M, Johnlock, Sherlock/OMC) Sherlock is marrying an American, and at the rehearsal dinner, best man John makes a drunken love confession he doesn’t remember the next day. Badly hungover, John can't find anyone to tell him what the hell happened to the wedding, where the grooms are, or how he can put it right so that Sherlock can be happy. But what if he's dead wrong about what will make Sherlock happy?

A Midnight Clear by khorazir (16K, T, Johnlock) It’s Christmas Eve, and Sherlock is working. Because that’s what he does. He doesn’t need Christmas, or holiday cheer, or even company. He’s fine on his own, thank you very much – until a series of strange encounters on his way back to Baker Street makes him reconsider.

A Story That Is Almost, But Not Quite, Entirely Unlike Blue Carbuncle by Iwantthatcoat (16K, M, Johnlock) It’s the most wonderful time of the year, and the Holmes Family is all set to have one of those unimaginable Christmas dinners— but the game is afoot, as Mummy’s friend is caught up in a Christmas mystery.

An Elegant Solution by ArwaMachine (19K, E, Johnlock) Sherlock finds himself unspeakably aroused by the idea of John with another man. Problem is, the only man Sherlock will permit be with John is Sherlock himself. Seems like an unsolvable problem. ... or is it?

An Ocean Away by westernredcedar (14K, T, Johnlock) Sherlock Holmes has been gone for twenty long years, time enough for John Watson's daughter to make it all the way to Harvard University.

Avast Ye Merry Gentlemen by StellaCartography (10K, E, Johnlock) Sherlock is not a Christmas person. John decides it's Christmas that needs changing.

Bright Blue Ink by 13_33 (13K, G, Johnlock, Warstan) When one of my patients asks me about my relationship with Sherlock Holmes, the great detective, I answer this: I am his chronicler, his assistant in solving crimes, his confidant and friend. Of course, all these terms hold true, now as then, at the beginning of our shared history. But just as in a family portrait you can only see the put-on smiles and never the real faces of the people, they were only part of what made up my true relationship with Holmes. I know him, I then add; I know him well. [ACD]

Deductive Reasoning by cormorant (8K, T, Johnlock) John finds out that Sherlock has assumed for a while that their relationship was romantic, and feels like maybe he should have been notified about that.

Doting Husbands by Calais_Reno (16K, M, Johnlock) Sherlock takes on a new hobby: writing a story. If only something would happen! Takes place a year after the ending of Wooing Sherlock Holmes. He and John have been married for a year, still retired, living in Sussex.

Full Mount by ArwaMachine (54K, E, Johnlock) After Sherlock unceremoniously returns from the dead, John finds himself inexplicably angry all the time. So he does what any emotionally-constipated British man does: he joins a Mixed Martial Arts gym. As John throws himself into the sport and joins in on underground no-holds-barred brawls, situations arise that just might force John to face what is really going on underneath all the rage.

Indefinite Lines by ArwaMachine (298K, E, Johnlock) When two lines, inclined towards each other, are extended indefinitely, it is inevitable that they meet. Upon meeting, the lines become something new. Together. Perhaps it’s been like that from the beginning for Sherlock and John—their lives weaving together, inclined towards one another, moving closer and closer to something greater than themselves.

Live from the Morgue by disfictional (8K, E, Johnlock) Molly interviews Sherlock on her podcast, Live from the Morgue. John listens.

Lost In A Good Book by khorazir (68K, M, Johnlock) After chasing a criminal into a poky second-hand bookshop, John and Sherlock find themselves not only stuck in the building, but in L-space itself. With things still raw and unsettled between them after the events surrounding the Culverton Smith case, this adds another dimension to their predicament, which not only consists of finding a way out of the shop (while avoiding getting murdered by the criminal), but also to finally address the issues between them.

Nightjet by khorazir (22K, M, Johnlock) Officially deceased for eighteen months and still looking for the last remainders of Moriarty’s criminal empire, an exhausted Sherlock boards a night train in Germany to bring him to his next hunting ground. Due to a mishap with the sleeper cars, he is forced to share a compartment with a stranger – who turns out to be not quite as strange as Sherlock thought. The universe isn’t lazy, after all …

Nothing to Celebrate by DiscordantWords (30K, M, Johnlock, Warstan) Sherlock Holmes is back from the dead. Things only get worse from there.

Our Ghosts And This by LipstickDaddy (12K, T, Johnlock) An epilogue in three acts.

Primavera by Berty (9K, T, Johnlock) Italy in the springtime is as romantic as it gets but is it enough to free unspoken words and feelings after years of silence?

Salut d'Amour by ecoutes (11K, G, Johnlock) Despite Holmes claiming that my narrations of our cases were tainted with sentimentality, his preferences in music, I learned, were awfully romantic. [ACD]

Spare Parts by Raina_at (63K, E, Johnlock) Two years ago, Sherlock Holmes jumped off the roof of New London Hospital. Two months ago, he walked into John's clinic as if no time had passed at all. John hasn't seen him since. But then Sherlock knocks on John's door with a case he can't say no to, and while figuring out why the biggest manufacturer or synthetic limbs in the System is going after veterans, they also need to find out whether there's a way to fix what's broken between them.

stirringofbirds between my arms by NotusLethe (18K, E, Johnlock, Enola/Tewksbury) Over the years, John Watson gets to know his new flatmate, Sherlock Holmes, and the man's clever ward. [Enola Holmes]

Stretch by illwick (13K, E, Johnlock) Sometimes the lines get blurry. [Part 35 of a BDSM established relationship series]

The Adventure of The Reluctant Docent by mydogwatson (23K, T, Johnlock) Someone is killing the docents of London. Sherlock is on the case when he meets a very interesting docent.

The Case of the Freudian Dick Pic Slip by expoduck (11K, E, Johnlock) John accidentally sends Sherlock a dick pic he'd intended for another man.

The Mystery of the Missing Metallurgist by rudbeckia (14K, M, Johnlock) A young wife engages Holmes to find her missing husband. Lestrade thinks the man has absconded to America, but Holmes rises to the challenge of Proving Lestrade Wrong. The case turns out to be far more complex and dangerous than they first thought, and Holmes sends Watson to secure Lestrade’s help in bringing a criminal gang to justice. When Holmes gets injured, Watson realises where his heart lies and a little lighthearted banter leads to a tentative confession. [ACD]

The Silence Between the Notes by J_Baillier (44K, M, Johnlock, Viclock) Lieutenant John Watson's days in London are painted in shades of grey after losing both his military career and his family. Could an unexpected request to travel to Vienna to track down the errant son of a wealthy family break the monotony?

The Wizard of Baker Street by Calais_Reno (23K, T, Johnlock) In which Sherlock is a wizard under a curse and John spends a lot of time as a cat.

‘tis the damn season by chrysanthemumsies (22K, E, Johnlock) Sherlock and John travel to Edinburgh to catch a homophobic serial killer in time for Christmas. They figure out how to use their words, more or less.

Trapezoid by SilentAuror (27K, E, Johnlock, OMC/ OMC) Corey Graham invites John and Sherlock to visit L.A. to consult on a project… at least, officially.

Yorkshire by lurikko (8K, E, Johnlock) They're in Yorkshire, in a house in the moors, for a case, only Sherlock keeps touching John. [Omegaverse]

[happygirl2oo2]

Every reference I could find to Sherlock's love of bees in Elementary, organized by episode number

season 1 episode 1:

Watson, walking onto the Brownstone's rooftop to find Sherlock and surprised to see beehives there next to him: "Um, did you know that honey was dripping through the ceiling?" Sherlock, sitting and looking at his beehives: "Yes. Happens sometimes." Watson: "I take it beekeeping is a hobby." Sherlock: "I'm writing a book. Practical Handbook of Bee Culture with Some Observations Upon the Segregation of the Queen. Up here. I've just started Chapter 19."

season 1 episode 5:

Sherlock, explaining how he knows someone: "We frequent the same beekeeping chat room. He has an impressive collection of Caucasians. Species of bee."

season 1 episode 7:

Watson: "There was a client back here a little while ago who was also interested in beekeeping." Edson: "Sure. You mean Sherlock."

season 1 episode 9:

*Sherlock is wearing a shirt with the writing “Bee 92” on it*

season 1 episode 12:

Sherlock: "Our six weeks together are very nearly up, Watson. In a matter of days, your room will be vacant. I'm very seriously considering turning it into one large apiary."

and

M, about Sherlock torturing him: "You figured out where you're gonna start yet?" Sherlock, looking over his table of torture devices that he brought that is shown to include a few beehives: "I have not. I had hoped to use the bees in some fashion, but then it occurred to me you might be allergic."

and

Sherlock: "Watson, what is it?" Watson: "I called your father last night. Given everything that's happened, I recommended staying on longer." Sherlock: "And?" Watson: "He agreed." Sherlock: "I suppose the apiary will have to wait."

season 1 episode 17:

Crabtree: "Delivery for you, Mr. Holmes." Sherlock: " Thank you, Crabtree, but I'm afraid I c… Oh, my God. Is that…?" Watson: "A bee in a box? Yes, it is. Fairly unimpressive as far as bribes go." Sherlock: "Not if you're an apiculturist. That's an Osmia avosetta. Solitary bee famed for building exquisite nests from flower petals. It's on the verge of extinction. Crabtree, this is exquisite. I cannot accept it. Please, tell Mr. Lydon not to contact me again."

and

[BEE BUZZING] Watson: "Hey, why do you have the box with the bee in it?" Sherlock: "We took Gerald Lydon's case." Watson: "We did?" Sherlock: "Well, frankly I couldn't say no to him. It would have felt like denying a dying man his last wish. We are taking this home, and then we are going to the genetics lab which confirmed his diagnosis."

and

Sherlock: "Close that door immediately!" Watson: "What's up? Sherlock: "I was examining the Osmia avosetta that Gerald Lydon gave me and it got loose." Watson: "Oh, so there's an almost-extinct bee flying around in here?" Sherlock: "Yes, and I would rather it didn't get out."

season 1 episode 19:

Miss Hudson, to Sherlock: "Oh, and I stacked your monographs that you wrote on your desk. I liked the one about queen bees."

season 1 episode 20:

Sherlock: "Another reason to dislike Milverton. He keeps cats." Watson, sarcastically: "Well, he should get himself a real pet, like a beehive." *Sherlock gives her a look*

and

[CELL PHONE RINGING] Sherlock, answering his phone: "Brownstone is on fire, my bees have escaped, and there is a giant comet headed for Manhattan." Watson: "Excuse me?" Sherlock: "The way the evening is going, I thought you could only be calling with more good news."

season 1 episode 21:

Sherlock: "What kind of an allergy requires a medical alert bracelet?" Watson: "Uh, anything that could bring on anaphylactic shock, certain foods, medicine, insect bites." Sherlock: " Exactly. A moment ago, I could have sworn I saw an Africanized honeybee." Watson: "How do you "Africanize" something?" Sherlock: "It's a term to describe a particularly aggressive species. It's odd to… Odd to see them here. They're not native to New York. It's almost as if someone has placed it here on a route known to be frequented by Hillary Taggart." Watson: "So you think he's planning a murder by bee?" Sherlock: "The hive will be facing southeast in dappled sunlight with minimal wind. And here they are, newly formed and flourishing. Oh, yes. And here is the food source. Someone's feeding them sugar water so they multiply even faster." Watson: "Well, it's pretty baroque way to kill someone, isn't it? I mean, cultivate bees, feed them, and then poke the hive with a stick every time Hillary Taggart runs by?" Sherlock: "Well, he might be planning to swipe her with lemongrass oil beforehand, make sure they're attracted to her. It's actually quite a tidy plan. You know, she flees, bees sting-- tragic accident." Watson: "If she's that allergic to bee stings, then she's gonna have an EpiPen." Sherlock: "Well, an EpiPen would work against one or two stings, but how effective is it gonna be against an army of bee assassins?" Watson: "If the man we are looking for is feeding these bees, he's gonna have to come here eventually." Sherlock: "Yeah. Quite soon, I'd imagine, 'cause the sugar water's getting low." Watson: "Ugh, great. So we get to stake out a hive of killer bees."

season 1 episode 24:

[Watson walks onto the brownstone's rooftop to find Sherlock sitting and looking at his beehives with a magnifying glass] Sherlock: "Do you remember the rare bee I was given for proving that Gerald Lydon had been poisoned?" Watson: "The bee in the box, sure." Sherlock: "Osmia avoseta is its own species, which means it should not be able to reproduce with other kinds of bees. And yet, nature is infinitely wily." Watson: "So box bee got another bee pregnant?" Sherlock: "Quite so. Which means, they should be reclassified as an entirely new species. First newborn of which… is about to crawl its way into sunlight." Watson: "Oh, my God." Sherlock: "As the discoverer of the species, the privilege of naming the creatures falls to me. Allow me to introduce you to Euglassa Watsonia." Watson, surprised and then touched: You named a bee after me? You named a bee after me." Sherlock: "Should be dozens more within the hour. If you'd like, I could come and get you once they're all here. Watson: "That's all right. I think I'll just watch."

season 2 episode 12:

[sherlock is shown taking a box out of his beehive]

and

Watson: "You didn't show me these letters. You hid them in a beehive."

and

[sherlock is shown taking the box back into his beehive]

season 3 episode 10:

Barbara: "Barbara Conway. I'm senior vice president of…" Sherlock: "Senior vice president of AgriNext's GMO research division. Quite the corporate monstrosity, AgriNext, hmm? In addition to your dominance in agricultural industries, there is powerful evidence to suggest that your neonicotinoid insecticides are the culprits in the ongoing bee genocide known as colony collapse disorder. Would you care to comment on that?" Barbara: "When you told my assistant you had some questions, was that just a lie to get in and harass me?" Sherlock: "Ms. Conway, are you familiar with the name Clay Dubrovensky?" Barbara: "No." Sherlock: "What about the Wutai Pingtung orchid?" Barbara: "I'm sorry. What?" Sherlock: "You are very good at feigning innocence. Perhaps it's all that lying about the bees."

season 3 episode 11:

Watson: "Can you imagine how she feels when she looks at it?" Sherlock: "I have done. Repeatedly. My name is Sherlock, and I have allowed empathetic thoughts to clutter my mind and reduce the clarity of my perception." Watson: "So you called in the bees to crowd out caring." Sherlock: "To no avail."

season 3 episode 14:

Mr. Joseph: "Mr. Holmes, thank you for agreeing to see me. We've actually met before-- sort of." Sherlock: "You're BeeBeeKing17." Mr. Joseph: "I am. (chuckles) You're a detective. I know from your posts. I have a bit of a problem…" Sherlock: "I'm gonna stop you right there, Mr. Joseph. I can't help you." Mr. Joseph: "You don't know what I'm asking." Sherlock: "I don't need to. In the four years I've frequented your Web site, I've sent you no fewer than 13 letters detailing my proposed solutions to the phenomenon known as colony collapse disorder. You have sent me exactly zero replies." Mr. Joseph: "You know how much correspondence I get?" Sherlock: "I've got no idea. I do know, however, that mine is backed by quality thinking. If you'd bothered to find that out, you wouldn't find yourself without a detective in your hour of need." Mr. Joseph: "Is there some way that I can make this up to you?" Sherlock: "I suppose, if you were to publish my theories on gamma rays as a potential solution to CCD, then I might be able to hear you out." Mr. Joseph: "Gamma rays? They… they've worked in a couple instances, but they… they don't scale as an answer. They're too dangerous. You give John Q. Beekeeper access to gamma rays, he'll melt his face off." Sherlock: "A fact I addressed in my most recent letter." Mr. Joseph: "Fine. Yeah, I'll put it on the site." Sherlock: "I also require that you change your online user name. The cheap punnery of "BeeBeeKing17" is offensive to musicians and apiarists alike. You'll make the change?" Mr. Joseph: "I guess." Sherlock: "Good. So what seems to be the problem?"

season 3 episode 20:

Sherlock (on the other line of the phone): "Watson, you still over there?" Watson: "Yes, I'm still here, because I can't go home, because of you. Why did you bring the bees in the house anyway?" Sherlock, shown to be standing in their kitchen while wearing his beekeeper suit and surrounded by bees: "Varroa mites are a pernicious threat to the colony. I intended a thorough inspection, as well as an application of baker's sugar as a preventative measure. My thoughts were concerned with colony collapse. I failed to see the more urgent threat of table collapse." Watson: "Wait a second. You're not talking about my table, are you? The one that I bought for my apartment?" Sherlock: "Two hours should be sufficient to return the hive to stasis. I'll be in touch."

season 3 episode 23 (the entire episode but especially):

Unnamed cop: "If you guys work for the USDA, why didn't you just say so?" Watson: "We don't. My partner's on a beekeeping message board with a few of their researchers. They asked us to come and have a look, since it's one of their colleagues that died."

and

Sherlock: "You might want to tell your colleague that the apiarist is not a strong suspect. Unnamed cop: "The hell she isn't. She was the only other person out here when this thing happened." Sherlock: " And as far as Watson and I have been able to discern, utterly devoid of any motive-- unlike the soulless corporate golem that is AgriNext." Unnamed cop: "You think a company did this?" Sherlock: "It wouldn't be the first time they'd harbored a killer." Watson: "He's right-- we found one there a few months ago. So what makes you think they did this?" Sherlock: "Elevated levels of Colony Collapse Disorder along the Northeast." Watson: "You putting that on AgriNext, too?" Sherlock: "Everett Keck did. His notes strongly suggest that the company's neonicotinoid pesticides are the cause." Unnamed cop: "So this guy was killed over some dead bees?" Sherlock: "A hundred million dead bees. The regional numbers are so anomalous that an international apiary summit has been convened at Garrison University to discuss the problem this week. Everett Keck's notes suggest he was willing to cut short that debate and lay the blame squarely at the feet of AgriNext."

and

Watson: "Oh… Looks like you opened up a satellite office for the Department of Agriculture in here." Sherlock: "25,000 species of bee-- always much to learn." Watson: "Well, if you're planning on picking up where Keck left off, it might be nice to solve his murder first."

and

Watson: "So you think that Keck tried to kill his boss to cover up poisoning a few bee hives?" Sherlock: "More than a few. I've come to believe that Everett Keck was not just studying Colony Collapse Disorder. Everett Keck was Colony Collapse Disorder incarnate. You might recall my recent concern over varroas in my own hives. These fears were born out of rumblings on BeeCircuit.com. Most of the talk on the spike of this season's colony death rate centered around the spread of deadly mites." Watson: "Okay, but I thought Keck was gonna prove it was pesticides. Sherlock: "That's what his note suggested. That's what he intended to report, but the data suggests that the parasites were appearing in greater than expected numbers everywhere he went." Watson: "You did all this overnight? Sherlock: "You know I outsource arithmetic to Harlan. Okay, so, that's Keck. And there are three other ASI researchers. He found more mites than the others. Many more. According to Harlan, the variance between Keck and his colleagues cannot be explained away by known confounds. The odds that Mr. Keck was not actively spreading varroa mites everywhere he went approaches one in 29,000." Watson: "So, there isn't a spike in Colony Collapse Disorder after all." Sherlock: "Every dead hive is a tragedy. But outside of one nefarious USDA field researcher, no, the CCD baseline would not be inflated at all." Watson: "Why would he do something like this?" Sherlock: "I don't know. I'm fairly certain, however, he had help. The heart attack that almost killed Calvin Barnes occurred whilst Mr. Keck was doing his rounds in Connecticut." Watson: "He had a partner." Sherlock: "We've solved one murder. Now we just have the remaining 100 million."

and

Tara Parker: "No. No way. You can't just write off a global issue because one guy went on a bee-killing spree." Sherlock: "I share your concerns about Colony Collapse Disorder writ large, I do. I have hives of my own. But your degree is in entomology, and, uh, the mathematicians have spoken."

and

Sherlock, excitingly surprised: "His Highness Sheik Nasser Al-Fayed is making an appearance?" Tara Parker: "Supposedly." Sherlock, explaining to Watson: "Nasser is an emir. He's a member of the royal family of Al Qasr in the United Arab Emirates. He's a black sheep. He's not trusted with state business, like his brothers." Griffin Parker, to which Sherlock is shown nodding in approvement: "He's also got the most expensive apiary on the planet. State-of-the-art hives." Sherlock: "He's a recluse. Rumors on BeeCircuit.com are that he never leaves his family's estate." Griffin Parker: "Well, I wouldn't, either. He has almost 1,000 species."

and

Sherlock: "I'm friendly with the moderator of BeeCircuit.com. You deleted your private messages, but he was able to dredge these off the server."

and

Sherlock: "You got away with kidnapping the sheik. You won't get away with what you did to Calvin Barnes. Or millions of bees."

season 4 episode 13:

Trent Garby: "I moved out because of you two. I couldn't take it anymore. The weird noises, the strange smells, the explosions, and the damn bees on the roof."

and

Watson: "Robert Frost said that fences make good neighbors. But maybe that's because there wasn't sound-dampening insulation back then. Since you are rebuilding anyway, we can have it installed for you as a belated housewarming gift. So a quieter home for you, and a neighbor who knows what he's getting into for us." Trent Garby: "You don't even know me." Watson: "We'd like to." Trent Garby: "All right. When I get the insurance settlement, I'll let you know." Watson, giving him a jar of honey: "This is from Sherlock. He wants you to know that bees can be good neighbors, too."

season 4 episode 23:

Bell: "We think he crossed with Krasnov, who was there to steal a barrel of pesticide. There's one missing." Watson: "Clothianidin is used to treat corn crops. I've heard Sherlock rail against the stuff. It's bad for bees. But it is good for explosives."

season 4 episode 24:

Morland, looking at Sherlock's hives: "They stay here even during winter, do they not?" Sherlock: "Excuse me?" Morland: " The bees. This is their home… rain or shine." Sherlock: "Yes, let's talk about bees, instead of the execution you just carried out in Yonkers."

season 5 episode 21:

Sherlock: "You might not know what Mr. Leroux looks like, but I assure you, those photographs of you showing my friend around will have the FBI and Interpol swarming your property like bees."

season 6 episode 8:

Kelsey: "I'm sorry if that sounds judgmental, but… judging you is kind of the whole point of this trip." Watson: "It's okay. I mean, you have to go through your process, right?" Kelsey: "Am I crazy, or did I see a bunch of beehives on your roof?"

season 6 episode 17:

Watson: "He named an inchworm after her?" Sherlock: "It’s not uncommon for scientists to name species after people they care for or admire. I named a honeybee after you. But I, of course, was honoring my work partner."

season 6 episode 18:

Sherlock: "We need to talk about what happens after I die." [cut to them now in the kitchen, with Watson holding a pile of pages] Watson, reading the title: "“The Last Will and Testament of Sherlock Holmes”?" Sherlock: "According to Mr. Horowitz, in three days' time, I am to be riddled with bullets by an unknown assailant in an unnamed part of the city. While I doubt that will happen, reading it did remind me that you should have a copy of the appropriate paperwork to ensure a smooth probate." Watson: "You didn't write all this up today." Sherlock: "No, I wrote it several years ago when we formalized our partnership. I just didn't give you a copy." Watson: "Am I reading this right? You left me everything?" Sherlock: "You're surprised?" Watson: "Uh… I guess I'm touched. Sherlock: " There are some directives in the back that you should review. Watson: "Instructions on what to do with your cerebellum? Sherlock: "Mmm. Also my bees. They will need a proper home."

season 6 episode 21:

Sherlock, walking into the room to find Watson filming a close video of his bees while playing a loud song: "Something I should know?" Watson: "Everyone got back to us while you were out. They said they would look into Agent Mallick if I gave them an up-close view of one of your beehives and put this song on repeat. I mean, I had to get movers to get it down here, but at least we did not have to humiliate ourselves this time." Sherlock: "Oh, you've been humiliated. You just don't realize it. One of the founding fathers of Everyone, StingSquat, is an admitted melissophiliac. He's aroused by bees. You just arranged a sex show with a cast of thousands."

season 7 episode 13:

Sherlock, sounding touched, after seeing that his hives are still in the brownstone after his years away: "You kept the bees." Watson: "I thought Arthur might find them interesting. Plus, the free honey.

[fancyfeathers]

@luckycharm1 asked a question

Hello! I’m pretty bad when it comes to tumblr etiquette since i do not understand how it completely works, but I hope its alright to send you this 😭 Regarding your previous post I wonder what would happen if the intelligent daughter ended up escaping and not get caught for a while. Like what would her plan be and how in the end would have William found her (or have trouble finding her since she probably would come up with a better escape plan than moriarty brothers darlings lol) I also just wanted to thank you for writing these stories bc this definitely brought back my Moriarty the patriot obsession 😭🩷

Ah you are so sweet, thank you! It is completely alright, I adore questions like this because it gets the gears in my head turning ❤️💕

This little girl knows enough about her parents history that she knows exactly what to do. During her walks through town, she had seen a house that leaves their bicycles against the side of their house and while she knows stealing is wrong but she doesn’t have much of a choice because if she sneaks on the train her father could easily have someone like Sebastian or James meet her at the station in London and that is exactly where she needs to go.

On bike it would take her at least three days, maybe four, to get to London. Traveling through the countryside it is harder for anyone to find her especially when they don’t know what she is trying to do. Luckily she does not have to steal anymore than she already has because she has memorized a book about edible plants, sure it does not taste good to the little girl, but it is what she has to do. Sleeping is the hardest bit, laying on the earth and using her coat as a blanket while she just wants to be with her mother and sister, but she can’t see them, not now anyway.

When she arrives in London, she immediately asks for directions from a stranger, which gets a weird look from the man but answers anyway. She is off once again, making her way through the London streets, avoiding any place she thinks anyone she knows may be. She props her stolen bicycle against the building and walks ups the stairs leading to the door and knocks, and a surprised blonde man answers, he was clearly startled by the sight of this child.

“M-may I help you, young lady? Are you lost?”

“No sir, this is the right address, correct?”

She hold a piece of paper up to the man for him to see. The man’s eyes widen with surprise even more so that this child was here.

“Y-yes, this is the right address.”

“Wonderful, judging by your expression you must be Dr. Watson.”

“Yes, I am and you must be the most intelligent child I have met.”

The little girl giggles at the compliment as the doctor handed the piece of paper back to her.

“Thank you, I wish I could stay to chat but I am afraid I do not really have time. Is Mr. Sherlock Holmes here?”

“Yes, um… please come inside.”

The doctor leads her upstairs to the flat and has to interrupt a conversation between Miss Hudson and the detective. Soon enough the residents of Baker Street find themselves sitting down with this little girl, having a conversation on the level of adults. She explains how she got there, biking all the way from Durham and then the question of why comes from the doctor and before the little girl can answer, Sherlock does.

“Because she wants to be my assistant, but why she wants to is the question.”

“Because my father is the Lord of Crime. I received my father’s intelligence but have the face of my mother, and I know she does not want to be with him and I want to figure out a way out for her… I-I won’t tell you my father’s identity if you don’t want to know, but please I want to help her.”

There is a shocked silence from around the table, except from the detective as he listens to her explanation. No one knows what to do, Miss Hudson would not have the heart to send her back to her family and neither would to two gentlemen, but surely they cannot expect this child to handle dangerous work that Sherlock deals with-

“Alright, seems like I have a new assistant.”

It would not take long for her father to find out where she is after that, living at Baker Street with the three adults. She put him in a stalemate, if he goes to claim custody of her, he will be exposed but he cannot let her continue down this road…

What to do?

[witchofhellridge]

Fanfiction: Sherlock Holmes and The Case of Curious Celebration

The early morning sunlight filtered through the foggy London air, casting a soft glow over 221B Baker Street. Inside the cozy apartment, Mrs. Hudson hummed to herself as she set the kettle on the stove. Today was no ordinary day, though it would take a man of Sherlock Holmes' peculiar genius to uncover that. Mrs. Hudson was not in her usual quiet mood-no, today she was brimming with the kind of secret anticipation reserved for grand schemes.

Watson descended the stairs, a small grin tugging at his lips. He entered the kitchen and nodded to Mrs. Hudson, whose conspiratorial smile grew wide as she handed him a cup of tea.

"All set, Mrs. Hudson?" Watson whispered, his eyes twinkling.

She gave an enthusiastic nod. "Everything is prepared. Oh, Dr. Watson, do you think he'll notice right away?"

Watson chuckled softly. "Sherlock? He'll suspect something in ten minutes, no doubt. But if we play it right, we might still catch him by surprise."

"Goodness me, I do hope so," Mrs. Hudson said, her voice a tad breathless. "He's never celebrated a birthday before, has he?"

"Not that I know of," Watson replied, sipping his tea. "And believe me, I've tried. He insists it's frivolous, but I have a feeling this might finally break his icy demeanor."

They both shared a knowing glance. The plan had been laid out over the past week with meticulous care, worthy of Holmes' own standards of precision and planning. Small puzzles scattered about the apartment would lead him to his inevitable fate: a birthday celebration, whether he liked it or not. Each clue would seem disconnected, but they would all converge in one unexpected conclusion.

Watson placed his cup down and stood straight. "It's time."

As if on cue, Sherlock Holmes emerged from his room upstairs, his dressing gown flaring like a cape behind him. His sharp eyes darted from Watson to Mrs. Hudson, instantly detecting the shift in atmosphere. He narrowed his gaze suspiciously, but said nothing as he walked past them, heading for the sitting room.

"Morning, Sherlock!" Watson said, trying to sound as casual as possible. "I trust you slept well?"

Sherlock paused mid-step, tilting his head slightly. "A strange question, Watson. What are you up to?"

"Me? Up to something? I'm insulted," Watson replied with feigned indignation. He busied himself by picking up a medical journal from the armchair and flipping it open, though he could feel Sherlock's piercing gaze upon him.

Mrs. Hudson, clearly struggling to maintain her composure, excused herself in a flurry. "Oh, I must fetch something from the kitchen!" she called over her shoulder as she practically bolted from the room.

Sherlock arched an eyebrow. "Suspicious," he muttered, folding his arms. "Very suspicious indeed."

Before Sherlock could probe further, a knock came at the door.

"Ah, that must be the post!" Watson said, leaping up a little too eagerly. Sherlock's eyes narrowed again. Watson's behavior was off-unnaturally chipper and too quick to act. Sherlock moved to the window, peering through the curtains as Watson retrieved the letter.

"How curious," Watson said, holding up the envelope. "It's addressed to you, Sherlock."

Holmes strode over, snatched the letter from Watson's hand, and examined it with keen interest. The envelope was plain, save for a rather smudged postmark, and the handwriting was unfamiliar. Sherlock opened it swiftly, eyes darting over the note inside. His brow furrowed.

"Interesting," he muttered. "A riddle."

Watson leaned in. "What does it say?"

Sherlock read aloud: "'What is seen once in a lifetime, twice in a moment, but never in a hundred years?'"

Watson feigned a thoughtful expression. "A curious puzzle, Sherlock."

"It's an elementary riddle," Sherlock replied, his tone clipped. "The answer is the letter 'M.' But why would someone bother sending me such a trivial thing?" He tapped the note against his palm, looking perplexed. "I despise this kind of petty amusement."

Watson suppressed a grin. The game was already afoot.

Holmes, never one to leave any mystery unsolved, was already turning the letter over, searching for more clues. A small slip of paper fell from the envelope, and Sherlock caught it with practiced ease.

"There's more," he murmured, unfolding the scrap of paper. "An address."

It led to a small shop not far from Baker Street. Sherlock's eyes gleamed with curiosity, though he would never admit it outright. Before Watson could utter another word, Sherlock was already reaching for his coat.

"Are you coming, Watson, or are you going to sit there all day with that insufferable smirk on your face?"

Watson hurried to his feet, grabbing his own coat. "Of course, Sherlock. Wouldn't miss it."

***

The small shop turned out to be an antiquarian's curiosity, filled with trinkets and oddities, the sort of place where one might stumble upon a forgotten treasure-or an elaborate prank. The bell above the door jingled as they entered, and a wizened old man looked up from behind the counter.

"Ah, Mr. Holmes," the shopkeeper said with a crooked smile. "I've been expecting you."

"Have you now?" Sherlock asked, his tone icy. "And why might that be?"

The old man chuckled and reached under the counter, producing a small box wrapped in brown paper. "This arrived for you early this morning. Special delivery."

Holmes took the package without hesitation and tore away the paper. Inside was another note, this one much more cryptic than the last: "From the place where the hands of time do not move, look beneath what has long since passed."

Sherlock's eyes flickered with intrigue, though he kept his face impassive. Watson could see the gears turning in his friend's mind.

"Watson, we're going back to Baker Street," Sherlock declared, his voice sharp. "I know where this leads." ***

Back at 221B Baker Street, Sherlock wasted no time. He moved with precision, scanning the room until his eyes settled on the old grandfather clock by the window. With swift movements, he pulled it away from the wall, revealing a dusty ledger hidden beneath. Inside the ledger was a third note: "The key is hidden where stories are spun, and the game is won."

"Stories are spun?" Sherlock muttered, his brow furrowing. "The answer must be the bookshelf." He crossed the room in quick strides, running his fingers along the spines of the volumes. His hand paused over one particular book-an anthology of old folktales. He tugged it free, and from the pages, a small brass key dropped into his hand.

"Another key," he said, holding it up to the light. "But to what?"

Watson, leaning against the mantel, did his best to suppress his amusement. "What do you think, Sherlock? Where could it possibly lead?"

Sherlock shot him a sharp glance, then pocketed the key. "It's time to solve this. There's only one place left to check."

Without further explanation, he strode upstairs to his own room. Watson followed, heart racing in anticipation.

Inside Sherlock's bedroom, the detective immediately approached his locked trunk, where he kept various personal effects and important case documents. The brass key fit perfectly in the lock, and with a twist, the trunk popped open.

Inside, to Sherlock's visible confusion, was a cake. A cake adorned with candles and a small note tucked into the icing that read: "Happy Birthday, Sherlock!"

Watson, unable to hold back his laughter any longer, clapped Sherlock on the shoulder. "Surprise!"

Sherlock blinked, staring at the cake as if it were a bomb waiting to explode. "A... cake?"

Mrs. Hudson appeared in the doorway, beaming. "Oh, Mr. Holmes, I do hope you're not too cross. It's just that we thought-"

Sherlock held up a hand, silencing her mid-sentence. He looked from the cake to Watson, then back to Mrs. Hudson. "You planned all of this?"

Watson nodded. "It was Mrs. Hudson's idea, really. I merely assisted. A little birthday surprise, Sherlock."

For a moment, Sherlock stood in stunned silence, as if his mind were processing the concept of a birthday celebration. Then, to Watson's great astonishment, Sherlock let out a small, reluctant chuckle.

"I see," he said, though his voice still held a trace of bemusement. "So this entire day-the riddles, the clues-they were all leading to this?"

"Precisely," Watson said, smiling. "Happy Birthday, Sherlock."

Sherlock sighed, but there was a softness in his expression, a faint gleam in his eyes. "You know, Watson," he said, picking up a fork and examining the cake with the same scrutiny he would reserve for a crime scene, "I think I despise birthdays a little less now."

And with that, Sherlock Holmes, the greatest detective in London, took a bite of cake, much to Mrs. Hudson's and Watson's delight.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hey Guys!

Another weekend without a fic list ready or any asks, so I took it upon myself collect some fics for a Spooky-Themed list that I will probably have never gotten an ask about anyway. Since I've a lot of Halloween lists, I thought I would try something different and put out some Horror and Thriller Themed fics! I went through my MFL list and tag-searched "horror" and "thrilller", so these fics are ones that the author has tagged as such, so I can't guarantee frights... but I hope that y'all will enjoy this list anyway! I haven't read any of these so please heed the tags!

AND if you have a fave horror or psychological thriller story you've written or want to recommend, PLEASE do in the notes or reblogs and I'll add them to this list!

Happy Spooky Season, everyone!

HORROR / THRILLER FICS (MFLs)

See also:

Halloween Fics (Oct 2018)

Halloween and Ghosts (updated Oct 31/21)

Halloween Fics 2023 (MFLs)

5FF: Spooky Saturday Edition (Oct 31/20)

Ghosts / Figments (Updated Oct 2023)

Within by songlin (T, 992 w., 1 Ch. || Horror) – Amazingly enough, John notices it first. It must be something to do with combat instincts, or paying attention to nagging feelings despite any amount of contradictory evidence, or just paranoia. Whatever it is, it boils down to this: something is wrong.

Little Slices of Death by Enterthetadpole (E, 994 w., 1 Ch. || Friends To Lovers, Horror, Humour, Happy Ending, Case Fic, Romance) – Sherlock Holmes gets involved in a case where the victims and crimes that are eerily similar to the works of a certain horror author stories. Will he solve the case before the people around him die around him?

I O U by MintoKitsune (T, 1,299 w., 1 Ch. || Horror / Drama, Kidnapping) – Moriarty kidnaps John and leaves Sherlock a little message... A short one shot about Jim being his mean ol' self. (FFNet)

These Hands of Yours by okapi (E, 2,700 w., 1 Ch. || ACD Canon || Supernatural Elements, Horror, Hands, Anal Fisting / Fingering, Halloween) – Holmes has casts made of his hands. Watson falls in love. So do the hands.

The Babadook by CatieBrie (T, 6,886 w., 1 Ch. || Babadook Fusion || Post-TRF, Horror, Demonic Possession, Violence, Halloween, Grief, Angst with Happy Ending) – “A children’s book,” John mutters as he flips it open. The pages are scrawled with beautiful charcoal lines and thick black ink. The cover, bright red, edges the open pages and something tugs at the back of John’s brain. It’s a familiar feeling, black and tarrish and thick in his thoughts. He shakes it off and picks the book up off his bed, turning so that he can sit on the edge and spread the book out across his knees. If it’s in a word or it’s in a look, you can’t get rid of the Babadook. He turns the page, ignoring the pressure building beneath his chest. There’s a closet on one page; paper doors meant to be opened by the reader flutter as John reads the text on the other page.

Black Cat by CatieBrie (E, 7,158 w., 1 Ch. || Psychological Horror, Supernatural Elements, Disturbing Themes, Body Horror, Sex, Major Consent Issues / Possible Rape, MCD, Intent Magic, Ambiguity) – He’s watching Sherlock crawl up his body, doesn’t have to see to know he has a blade tucked away somewhere, knows his body will react no matter what. “Do you know what this is, John?” Sherlock holds up a doll made of rudimentary cloth stuffed with god knows what. It’s wearing a crude rendition of John’s favorite striped shirt, denim pants and the hair is too fine and blonde-shocked-grey to be anything else but his. John tries to answer, has no voice, shakes his head. “It’s a poppet.” Sherlock explains, pushes the arms together and John’s limbs react, snapping to his sides and remaining there even as he tries desperately to struggle free.

The Spirit Child by VelvetMace (M, 7,287 w., 1 Ch. || Psychological Horror, Disturbing Themes, Horror, Gore) – A small wooden box filled with clay and feotus bones yields more than just clues to a violent murder. A Halloween Story. Read at your own risk -- and I do not say this lightly.

Leaves by DiscordantWords (NR, 7,513 w., 1 Ch. || Dreams and Nightmares, Dream Sharing, Halluciinations, Horror / Unsettling, Ambiguous/Open Ending) – It came on a Wednesday, with the post. 

Ruins of the Dark by philalethia (M, 8,205 w., 1 Ch. || Dark Sherlock AU ||  Post-TRF, Horror, Supernatural Elements, Blood and Gore, Suicidal Thoughts, Extremely Dubious Consent) – Three years after “The Reichenbach Fall,” Sherlock comes back. But he comes back wrong.

The Web by DiscordantWords (M, 8,421 w., 2 Ch. || Post-TRF, Horror, Spiders, Horrific Imagery, Spying, Mild Gore) – Moriarty is dead. That doesn't mean he isn't watching.

I Could Try by Arcwin (T, 9,583 w., 5 Ch. || Greek Mythology Crossover || Post-TRF, Orpheus and Eurydice Myth, POV John, Pining John, BAMF John, Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, Horror, Angst with Happy Ending) – John is grieving Sherlock's death post Reichenbach until one day, he sees the violin case, and something inside him tells him to pick it up. Crossover between BBC Sherlock and the Greek tragedy Orpehus and Eurydice, wherein Eurydice is killed for her beauty and taken to the Underworld. Orpheus, being the son of Apollo (the God of Music and Medicine) travels to the Underworld to convince (via playing his lyre) Hades and Persephone to let Eurydice go. Orpheus then must travel with Eurydice behind him, not looking back, until they exit to the land of the living.

Puzzlebox by  standbygo (E, 9,867 w., 5 Ch. || Hellraiser Fusion || True Love, Supernatural Elements, Psychological Horror, First Kiss, Post S2, Angst with Happy Ending) – A love story with horror. A horror story with a happy ending.

Apprehension by BashfulBunny (M, 14,339 w., 19 Ch. || Thriller, Romance, Kidnapping, Drug Use, Medical, Undercover, Road Trips, Hurt/Comfort, BAMD Captain John, Action/Adventure, Falling in Love, Angst with Happy Ending, Mercenary John, Fluff and Angst, Protective John/Sherlock) – John and Sherlock have never met and don’t know each other. For some reason John kidnaps Sherlock (maybe he thinks he’s working for good people, while in fact they are bad and lie to him; he’s got an order to kidnap Sherlock Holmes and deliver him to somebody. John himself isn’t a bad person though). John is protective. When he realises that he, in fact, has done a really bad thing (and was lied to, depending on the scenario), he saves Sherlock (from his employers perhaps) and wants to take him back where he’d taken him. But he won’t be able to get rid of Sherlock easily, or at all for that matter. Sherlock won’t go.

Scream! by johnwatso (E, 15,250 w., 8 Ch. || Scream Crossover || Post S4, Horror / Slasher, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Case Fic, Minor Character Death, Copycat Killer, Three Garridebs Moment) – An unknown number starts calling Sherlock and asking questions about horror movies. John is pretty sure it's a serial killer.

The Writing on the Wall by grannysknitting (M, 24,139 w., 11 Ch. || Pre-S2, Horror/Supernatural, Mild Gore) – Lestrade notices John behaving oddly at a crime scene. Unfortunately so does Mycroft. What is it about the people living at 221B? (FFNet)

Still of the Night by michi_thekiller (E, 30,762 w., 22 Ch. || 1950s Dark Vampire Greaser AU || Vampire Sherlock, Greaser Sherlock, Nerd John, Rape/Non-Con Elements, Period-Typical Homophobia, Horror, Seduction) – 1.) Curfew must be obeyed. 2.) Streets must be clear by sundown. 3.) If you find yourself out after curfew, seek shelter at the home of a friend, relative, or neighbor whom you know and trust. 4.) Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should any unknown persons be allowed into the home after curfew.

From a Well, Dark and Deep by Vulpesmellifera (M, 32,691 w., 18 Ch. || Post S4, Supernatural Elements, Horror / Mild Body Horror, Bed Sharing, Possession, Hand Holding, Whump, Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers, Coming Out, Alternating POV, Nightmares, Caring John, Happy Ending) – Sherlock Holmes is desperately trying to reconcile his newfound memories and feelings within his transport—a transport that won’t quit with the nightmares and the strange, fiddly anxieties that crop up at the most inopportune moments. On the advice of his psychiatrist—not that he’s thrilled to be taking the man’s advice, but needs must—he's going to mark the anniversary of Eurus’ torments. That explains why he visits the well. What he finds at the well, though, is entirely unexpected. Meanwhile, John Watson has finally come to terms with something he’s ignored his entire life. He’s ready to share that something with Sherlock, except Sherlock isn’t acting himself. It's not the time for confessions, and John determines he must get to the bottom of his best friend's affliction before he can reveal anything. Part 3 of Vulpes' Halloween Johnlock

Slender: However Improbable by philalethia (M, 33,378 w., 5 Ch. || Slender Man AU || Post-TRF, Case Fic, Horror, Science Fiction, Supernatural Elements, Mild Gore) – Six months after The Fall, John is falling apart. Then a homeless woman is thrown from the roof of St. Bartholomew's; a tall, thin man in a black suit begins follow him; and John slowly realises that both he and Scotland Yard are very, very out of their depths.

Where The Ghosts Have Voices by HappyJuicyfruit (M, 37,691 w., 12 Ch. || Supernatural AU || Ghosts, Magical Realism, Light Horror, Fluff and Smut, John Can See Ghosts, John Whump, Emotional Manipulation, Dark Magic, Coma, Injury Recovery, Blow Jobs, Anal, Happy Ending, John’s Past, Mr Holmes, Powerful John, Holmes Brothers, Sherlock’s Past, Past Viclock, Drug Abuse, Hair Pulling) – John has lived his whole life as an outcast. It is only when he meets Sherlock, that be realizes being a freak might not be such a bad thing, and that the curse he has lived with his whole life may be a gift after all.

This Is Family by SaraStarchild (T, 39,840 w., 16 Ch. || Hereditary AU || Psychological Horror, Body Horror, Demonic Possession, POV Third Person Limited, Protective Mycroft, Cults, Mycroft Whump, Sherlock Whump, Major Character Death, Graphic Violence, Retelling) – When the Holmes family's secretive mother and matriarch, Ellen Holmes, passes away, the family she leaves behind – father Martin, sons Mycroft and Sherlock, and daughter Eurus – begins to unravel cryptic and increasingly terrifying secrets about their ancestry. The more they discover, the more they find themselves trying to outrun the sinister fate they seem to have inherited. This is, pretty much, a word-for-word retelling of the 2018 Ari Aster film, Hereditary. Part 1 of Sherlock Halloween Stories

Emergency by EmeraldUrAFreak (M, 40,353 w., 24 Ch. || Teenlock AU || Teen Romance, Drug Use, Angst, Hospitalized John, Broken John, John Whump, Absent Parents, Sherlock Fixing John, Insecure John, Younger John, Older Sherlock, Helping Each Other, Papa Lestrade, Case Fic, Alternating POV, Mild Gore, Horror, Non-Graphic Violence, Corpses) – Recovering drug addict Sherlock Holmes meets supposedly permanently hospital stuck John Watson. As they become friends- and maybe even more - they have ups and downs finding out each other’s pasts. Sherlock is shocked at how deep John's goes resulting in a case of new stakes. Fixing old relations and creating new ones that are hard to keep in this dreadful time. They never knew what was waiting around the corner.

The Straw Man Fallacy by Vulgarweed (E, 40,422 w., 8 Ch. || Wicker Man AU || Ritual Sex, Sacrifice, Mystery and Horror, Romance, Fuck or Die, Dubious Morality, Mildly Dubious Consent, Pagan Festivals, Public Sex, First Time, Case Fic, Virgin Sherlock, Scotland, Kilts) – Summerisle is not a welcoming place to visitors, but it shows its best face at May Day. For ulterior motives.

Curse of the Were-Tuna by WhoGroovesOn (E, 46,916 w., 9 Ch. || Were-Creature AU || Nudity, Aquariums, Fish, Body Horror, Curses, Cuddling, Romance, Transformations, Frottage, Anal, Fem! Moriaty/Moran, First Time) – John couldn’t help but feel as though the large tuna beyond the glass was staring at him, which was weird because it’s not like fish had eyelids, they always seemed to be staring at things.

Distortion by holmesian_love (NR, 51,585 w., 23 Ch. || Post S4, Faked Suicide / Suicide Attempt, Hurt/Comfort, Medical Examination, PTSD, Psychological Horror, Blood, Spiders, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Parentlock with Rosie, Angry John, Confusion) – John Watson is persuaded to move back into Baker Street with Rosie. The friendship -though delicate - is mending slowly after everything they've been through. That is, until strange events start happening to John which begin to disrupt the happy life they have been creating. Is there a medical explanation, or is something more sinister at play? Will they discover the cause before it tears them apart for good?

To Be Human by ohlooktheresabee (NR, 78,437 w., 13 Ch. || Post-THoB, Graphic Violence, Synesthesia, Case Fic, Serial Killers, Kidnapping, BAMF John, Sherlock is a Mess, Asexuality/Demisexuality, Torture, Protective John, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Medical Procedures, Queerplatonic Relationships, Asperger Syndrome, Thriller, Insecure Sherlock, Touching, Caring John, Affection, Hurt Sherlock, Touch Starvation) – There is a serial killer on the loose with a penchant for collecting the brains of his victims. Sherlock, John and Scotland Yard are on the case, but something about the chosen victims has Sherlock on edge. While they piece together the clues that will lead to the killer, John begins to realize that the way his best friend thinks may sometimes be more a hindrance than a help...

The Killing Principle by Vulpesmellifera (E, 104,593 w., 46 Ch. || American AU || Gay John, Serial Killer Mary, Bum Appreciation, Sherlock is William, Dating Difficulties, BAMF Sherlock, Slow Burn, Thriller, Confessions, Whump, Angst with Happy Ending, Minor Character Death) – John Watson served twice in AmeriCorps, married his high school sweetheart, and then entered med school. A sudden arrest and accusation of multiple murders ends his promising career, irrevocably altering his life's trajectory. Acquitted of his wife’s crimes, John spends the next ten years as the maligned ex-husband of convicted serial killer Mercy Mary. A job offer draws him out of hiding and back to Connecticut - the very state where the crimes were committed. He needs the money, and the job is a dream. Then he meets the brilliant William Vernet, and it seems like he has a second chance at life and love. But the past has a way of catching up.

Monsters in the Woods by ArwaMachine (E,114,760 w., 16 Ch. || 1980′s Summer Camp Horror AU || Character Death, Violence, Gore, Spooky Stuff, Blow Jobs, Anal, Hand Jobs, Kissing, Period-Typical Homophobia) – John isn’t particularly sure why he took the counsellor position at Camp Baker Stream, an American-style summer camp for rich kids. He isn’t fond of the wilderness, nor is he fond of kids. He also isn’t sure if he’s fond of his cabin-mate, a strange bloke named Sherlock Holmes who seems perpetually on edge and more than a bit of an arse. It certainly doesn’t help that apparently the camp has a sordid past—a series of gristly murders that took place eight years ago, perpetrated by one James Moriarty. Sherlock seems convinced that the events of the past are doomed to repeat, but that idea seems to fall in the realm of the impossible. That is, until camp counsellors start going missing… Inspired by every 80s slasher flick that is so bad it’s good, this fic merges summer camp horror tropes with the BBC Sherlock universe, adding a sprinkle of smut for good measure!

Welcome to Silent Hill by Cleo2010 (M, 130,227 w., 37 Ch. || Silent Hill Fusion || POV First Person Sherlock, Unrequited Love, Psychological Horror, Violence / Gore, Monsters, Nudity, Drug Use, Harm to Children, Cults, Distressing Imagery, Torture, Death) – John is missing. When Sherlock receives a text summoning him to Silent Hill he's intent on reclaiming his friend but the town has other ideas. Our detective must battle through a world shaped by his own troubled psyche as he uncovers the town's secrets, attempts to find John and hunt down Jim Moriarty. Part 1 of the Welcome to Silent Hill series

In the Deep, Where Dark Things Sleep by HardlyFair (M, 184,979 w., 26 Ch. || Scorpio Races AU || Graphic Violence, 1960′s, Slow Burn, Past Drug Use, Bed Sharing, Water Horses, Folklore, First Kiss/Time, Horror Elements, Vet!John, Protective John, Magical Realism, Horse Racing, Mutual Pining, Angst with Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort) – The closer time crawls to November, the more water horses the Scorpio Sea spits out. The colder Thisby becomes. Sherlock Holmes is an islander - completely surrounded by the water. John Watson, he knows, comes from the mainland and lives for the Races. On the first of November, Sherlock will race. The man holding steady by his side is someone he never expects. A Scorpio Races AU (Maggie Stiefvater), but no knowledge of the book needed.

WORKS IN PROGRESS

Closure by S_IRIS (E, 28,718+ w., 12/45 Ch. || WiP || Alternate Universe || Viclock then Eventual Johnlock, Falling in Love, Horror, Case Fic, Adventure of the Gloria Scott Adaptation, Emotional / Psychological Abuse, Abusive Relationships, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Angst with Happy Ending, Slow Burn, Sherlock in Denial) – After a brush with death, Sherlock is convinced by Victor to recover in their country house and give their crumbling marriage one last chance. But the retreat turns into a nightmare when Sherlock starts to feel a malevolent presence in the house and finds no one believing him except the son of the missing groundskeeper.

The Things That Haunt Us by BRNZ (E, 92,993+ w., 18/? Ch. || Graphic Depictions of Violence, Dead People, Child Death, PTSD John, Psychological Horror, Nightmares, Bed Sharing, Heavy Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Developing Relationship, Childhood Trauma, Domestic Bliss, BAMF John, Friendship / Love, POV John, Pining John, Therapy) – What happens when a post war vet with PTSD takes up with a madman detective and they spend time investigating and solving some truly horrific crimes? How does the doctor who can kill with steady hand process all that additional trauma? How do we recognise that our past still haunts us, in ways we don't realise? When you are caught in a vicious cycle of needing the thrill of the chase, and having to deal with the fallout...what happens when you might need to choose between the two for your own sanity? The story of how two damaged men managed to find their way back to each other and begin to make a future together.

[ao3feed-jimlock]

The Solar System

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/pR7qloF by lina_has_wings What is the solar system? A simple question even a child in kindergarten could answer with no hesitation, right? According to Wikipedia, a source that is never wrong, The Solar System is the gravitationally bound system of the Sun and the objects that orbit it. Easy to understand and imagine. However, one genius man thinks otherwise and would never accept the common understanding of this term. Or: Sherlock has his own views on the Solar System. 5 times when Jim judges him/makes fun of him and 1 time when he defends him Words: 4163, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Series: Part 6 of consulting husbands au, Part 11 of Sheriarty my love Fandoms: Sherlock (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: M/M Characters: Sherlock Holmes, Jim Moriarty, Sebastian Moran, John Watson, Original Characters, Irene Adler (Sherlock Holmes) Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/Jim Moriarty Additional Tags: Fluff, Established Relationship, 5+1 Things, Time Skips, Fluff and Humor, Sherlock refuses to learn the solar system, Everyone makes fun of Sherlock, Changing POVs, POV Third Person, POV Alternating, This Is STUPID, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Consulting Husbands (Sherlock) read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/pR7qloF

[meetinginsamarra]

mayprompts2024 #5, awkward

Read part one (using the prompt “box”) here

Read part two (using the prompt “familiar”) here

Read part three (using the prompt “fall”) here

++++++

Some of you anticipated or suggested this or possibly wished it to happen and with today’s prompt, well, it was sort of inevitable really.

Time for some (sort of) testing! Here we go…

++++++

The Perfect Place - Part Four

“Ah, I see.” John nodded wisely.

(John did not. But he supposed a successful salesman should never ever admit that he had not understood one word of what the client had said.)

Sherlock hummed appreciatingly. John is so clever, he thought, understanding me even I don’t.

“Position in, erm,” John fake-cleared his throat, “of the bed is very important.”

John scratched his neck. God, this was so awkward. All these verbal slips. Thankfully the customer wasn’t fazed by his terrible blundering. Maybe he hadn’t even heard because he was currently focusing on stroking his right hand lovingly over the silky covering of the bed. Up and down. In circles, too.

Sherlock sighed. “It’s so smooth.” (Wishing he could be able to stroke the skin on John’s neck.) “I like how it feels,” he added and wondered if John would be this soft as well.

John, jealous of the bed once more, wished he could swap places with the lucky furniture. The beautiful man caressed its fabric as if it carried a lover’s skin.

Suddenly the client stiffened the index and middle finger of his right hand and forcefully stabbed them into the mattress. Multiple times.

The boxsprings creaked a tiny little bit. The sound was deafeningly loud in the silence of the bed shop.

Both men stared transfixed at the moving fingers, deeply lost in thought. How seamlessly they glided in and out of the mattress. And in. And out again.

(Actually, they were both thinking about lube. Albeit being applied in different scenarios.)

“It’s delightfully rigid.” Sherlock panted a bit due to the physical exertion. (It was a mental one, in fact.) “But the creaking of the boxsprings could be bothersome when I turn around in the bed.” (Meaning while having sex.)

“Does your bed often creak when you turn in it?” New beads of sweat had formed on John’s fore head. (Having imagined turning in snych with the customer.)

Looking down, John realized that he had also mimicked the gesture, as in stiffening two of his fingers while stabbing at the air. (His hand had been perfectly steady while doing so.)

John quickly shoved his hand in the pocket of his trousers in an effort to hide the evidence. (What his still rigid fingers found in there was some other kind of evidence.)

“I’m versatile in my positions.” Sherlock blinked, slightly confused. Was that the correct answer to John’s question? (To be clear, Sherlock did not lie. He was versatile in bed. Verily so.)

John coughed. “Yes, well, that’s only a matter of choosing the correct set of boxsprings according to the distribution of body weight on the mattress.”

John congratulated himself on coming up with this brilliant answer. Being alert in tight situations had always been his forte. (Inside his trousers John was alert and tight, too.) It sounded absolutely logical and also offered him a most welcome opening to finally ask the question that had burned on his tongue for some time.

“Would there usually be more than one person using this bed on a daily basis?” Oh yes, very smart and artful like the good old Three-Continents-Watson, John mentally patted himself on the shoulder.

Staring at John, Sherlock said, “No, currently it’s just me.” (Hoping this would change soon.)

Feeling bold about heading into the right direction, John risked inquiring further and took a dare. “You don’t have a boyfriend, then? Which is fine by the way.”

“I know it’s fine.” Sherlock huffed, “Or it would be if I had one.” Like you, Sherlock added in his mind.

The first bead of sweat finally dripped off John’s fore head. He felt hot (and bothered) and a wave of intense longing threatened to wash him away. Let me be the one, he pleaded internally.

+++++

tagging some people @calaisreno @totallysilvergirl @lisbeth-kk @peanitbear @raina-at

[amypihcs]

Watson's charms strike again!

HELLOHELLO! Okay, i usually make crazy long posts, but this will be even longer than usual. Dunno if I'll include any gifs even if all of us would deserve gifs of Ted's handsome and smiley face.

SO LET'S GET STARTED!

Oh, such a nice scenery! They were tired from the journey, certainly, and morning brings new light and optimism. So good.

Unfortunately, not everything is just so good.

If both heard the same thing, neither were asleep. And in fact Watson is very much sure of what he heard.

I love that Watson is so alert and stays on his guard even if he's tired. It's so in character for a doctor AND a former soldier AND Sherlock Holmes' husband.

And in fact I guess that his bullshit detectors were blaring already when he saw Barrymore grew paler. Uhm. Detective Watson is on the case now.

Thanks for the bisexuality. And we need to remember his bias, THEIR bias, Watson's and Sir Henry's, toward the possibility that Barrymore might be the culprit.

In any case, his reasoning is sound and one handsome doctor hops out of Baskerville Hall and goes to the Grimpen post office!

Look at this cutie! And as he walks he thinks! How could it be that it was Barrymore in London if he was at the hall.

Oh well, simply common sense, logic and courtesy went down and nulled the telegram trick. Easy.

Holmes would have words for that, but the boy is innocent, how could he know? I don't blame him. He seems a nice lad.

And Watson is missing his husband SO. Hey! Who's there?

AAAH! the famous Stapleton, the naturalist! Watson flexes a bit his powers of observation and they end up going for a walk up to Merripit House. And we discover that Stapleton has OPINIONS.

On Sir Charles' death. Uhm... And he's also rather curious!

HEY! Why are you asking of Holmes? bah! Fans! Watson is answering well with 'i can neither confirm nor deny...' But yes. Rude!

Oh well. Once this FANBOY has been calmed down, let's resume the walk. You like this place, you say?

Watson would like to have a bit of sport, to get some adrenaline with a nice, fast ride but yeah.

BETTER NOT. Bogs are not to be trifled with.

W: OH WELL, THEN I MIGHT TRY! S: BLOODY HELL NO, NEVER, YOU'D CROACK BADLY. - Oh! A butterfly!

And then he be zooming.

Why so many people are so anxious to meet m- A-Woman. A-beautiful-Woman.

Watson.exe has stopped working.

-Say something charming- -NOT LIKE THAT JOHN!-

Well, Miss Stapleton knows what she wants at least. But she's not explaining a thing...

WO! Watson managed TWO coherent sentences!

And Beryl Stapleton has something to hide. And so does her brother... Interesting.

Sir... Henry? no? And no, there's been a misunderstanding. Watson is NOT Sir Henry, but now you've made the biggest gossip girl of the country curious.

Ah, some small talk now, right?

So nice that you want to call at the Hall, but no, I'm sorry, Mr Stapleton, I'm taken.

How can you just invite the admittedly charming man you have met not half an hour ago upstairs to see your collection of BUTTERFLIES, Stapleton?

Oh well, Watson takes his leave and he is missing his Holmes so much.

AND WHAT IS ALL THIS RUNNING AROUND HERE!??

Miss Stapleton is DEFINITELY hiding something and Watson has recovered enough neurons to try to charm her into revealing her secret.

Well, he fails the ability check.

She is persistent if nothing else.

SO! We met a strange couple fo siblings. Watson charmed and was charmed. And we learn that people are hiding things around the moor. Interesting.

We'll see now what comes down in the next chapter!