#another author's note; i havent read homestuck in literally 3 YEARS so if i get some characters wrong please just. be niceys to me

[dirkjohn-zone]

Roll For Charisma

author's note: this is a rewrite of a two year-old fic i abandoned back in 2020. so, if this looks familiar, no it doesn't! ship: dirkjohn! (not just yet tho. we'll get there eventually) warnings: passing mentions of Dave having broken an arm, but nothing graphic. humanstuck? would that count? word count: 2,678

Summertime! John always loved summer. He wasn’t really a kid that went out and played outside during the summer, but he did love the freedom that came with the season. No school, the weather is always nice and warm, and he had more than enough time to practice on the piano. Plus, he can go see his friends whenever he wants! It’s awesome.

He took a deep breath as the wind rustled the trees and windchimes. Contrary to popular belief, his neighbourhood was pretty quiet in the summer. Sure, there was a community pool, but it was pretty far from his part of the neighbourhood. Besides, he likes going on walks more than swimming. 

He looked around at the houses on either side of him. He has almost the entire neighbourhood remembered. He’s been here his entire life. He smiled slightly at the familiarity of it all. He wondered if he’d ever get tired of it. 

He continued his walk in relative silence, listening to the birds sing and leafs shuffle against each other. It was… very peaceful. Like nothing could ever go wrong.

… Until something did go wrong.

He yelped as someone crashed into him, grabbing onto his shirt and causing both of them to plummet into someone’s yard. The impact knocked the air clean out of him, and for a second he thought he felt some bone in his body pop. Behind him, he could hear the sound of wood and wheels bouncing against the pavement before coming to a sudden stop.

John wheezed, curling in on himself in pain. 

He heard a familiar monotone laugh next to him. 

After a long moment of silence, John finally opened his eyes to see one Dave Strider sprawled out on his back in the grass, a completely deadpan expression on his face.

“Hey Dave,” John croaked.

“Sup,” he responded.

They laid in silence before Dave stood up, like nothing happened, and offered John a hand. He gladly took it, wheezing out a laugh. Dave let go and adjusted his shades to higher up on the bridge of his nose before looking around. 

“Why’d you almost kill me, man?” John asked in a joking tone.

Dave smirked for about half a second at the question. “I was goin’ downhill, you were goin’ up,” he said, making small gestures with his hand as he spoke. “We both would’ve died if I didn’t go for this dude’s lawn. Probably, like, broken an arm or some shit. I mean, I broke my arm before, so no biggie.”

John hummed, following after Dave as he began to walk off. “Well, good thing we didn’t land in the street!”

“Yeah, no shit.”

There was a breath of silence before Dave spoke up again. “Anyway, I was headin’ for your house to tell you something. Finally convinced Bro to get this sick ass nerd game I think you’d like. Dirk never shuts up about it.”

He knelt down and pried his longboard out of a bush, picking a few leafs out of the wheels before standing up again.

“I’m only saying that so you’ll wanna play it. I’d never want to, I fuckin’ suck at math.”

John tilted his head in curiosity. “What’s it called?”

Dave made a few gestures with his hand, trying to remember. He snapped his fingers a few times. “Dragons and… something, I think? Somethin’ stupid like that. It’s like… an adventure game, but… a board game? But also… not? You get what I’m saying, right?” He turned to face John, who now felt like he was being put on the spot.

“I– I think?” John replied, a little confused.

“Cool, because I don’t know how to explain it.” He made his way to the sidewalk, setting down his longboard and holding it in place with one foot. “Let’s boogie to the store then.”

John laughed quietly as he walked over. “Since when did you say boogie?”

Dave’s cool composer faltered for just a moment before he brushed it off. “The dumb stuff Dirk says is rubbin’ off on me. Now get on the board before I make you walk.”

John stuck his tongue out at Dave, who did the same in return.

Carefully, they both got on and they were off. 

They’ve been doing this for years now, precariously riding on the same longboard since John didn’t own one and Dave’s had one long before they ever met. It wasn’t the safest thing, obviously, but they know how to not fall off. 

Most of the time.

Dave ended up breaking his arm for the second time when they were riding together. Honestly, John is still surprised Dave trusts him enough to keep this as their primary means of transportation. 

After some time, and an unreasonably long argument about musicals, they finally reached the shop. John hopped off the board and stared, wide-eyed at the shop. He’d only ever heard about it from Dave’s complaints and customer-bashing. He’d never seen it in person.

One story, but pretty big from the look of it. The windows had drawings of fantasy creatures, and bold, fancy text that let any passers-by know about what they sold. There was a sign standing near the door talking about a special deal with your first purchase. Free dice.

Dave barely acknowledged it as he walked past John. 

“A free set of dice with your very first purchase?” John echoed the words on the sign, and Dave whipped around to look at him.

He stared at John in confusion for a moment before he looked at the sign. “Oh! Yeah, I was behind that brilliant idea. Bro wanted more customers, so he finally fuckin’ listened to us on something.” He laughed, but it was clear that his older brother pissed him off.

John hummed, a sympathetic look on his face. He stepped back slightly and read the sign that hung above the front door. It was wooden, and had a fancy mediaeval-style font that read Strider’s Tabletop Shop. John laughed a little at it. It was fun to say.

After that, John finally made his way inside, Dave following close behind. 

A little bell rang as he opened the door, and the boy at the counter looked up. He looked almost exactly like Dave; dark skin with pale patches from vitiligo, blond hair, and pretty damn muscular. That’s really where the similarities end, though. He wore sharp, triangular shades, a mullet, and a bright orange bracelet. He leaned forward, resting his chin on his palm.

“About damn time you got here. I think I would’ve offed myself if I had to take any more of Terezi’s complaints.” As he said that, someone from the back of the store gasped, as if offended. 

Whoever it was that gasped walked over from behind a shelf and looked in the general direction of the counter. “I’m not complaining, just giving… constructive criticism.” 

That must be Terezi. She definitely stood out against the dark colours of the shop. She had on a wildly coloured outfit, probably hundreds of bracelets, and almost neon red streaks of colour in her hair. What was strangest about it was that it… actually looked pretty good. What the fuck?

The boy at the counter scoffed, waving his hand dismissively. “You’re still complaining.”

Terezi scowled, but not in a serious way. “Whatever. The only complaint I have is your stench. You smell like a dumpster fire. Have you ever tried deodorant?”

“I have, thank you.”

Terezi made a motion with her head that mimicked an eye roll before turning around and going back to what she was doing.

John just sort of… stood there, not really knowing what to do. Dave stared blankly, seemingly unamused. The boy at the counter looked at Dave, then at John.

“Who’s that?” He asked, getting Dave’s attention.

Dave made a face of what could be described as… annoyance? It’s really hard to tell with this guy. 

“John? Egbert? The total dweeb I’ve been friends with for uh…” Dave snapped his fingers as he made his way to the counter. 

“Seven years,” John added, and Dave nodded.

“Seven years. Seven! How do you not know who this guy is?” Dave leaned down and tucked his longboard under the counter. “Oh, yeah, uh… John, this is Dirk. My twin,” he added, gesturing to Dirk.

Ohhhh so that’s who Dirk is. John always thought there were just two Striders. That’s cool. 

“Nice to meet you, John,” Dirk said in a tone similar to Dave’s. 

“Nice to meet you too,” John said with a smile. 

Dave stared at the both of them for a moment before resting his arm on Dirk’s head.

“So, how do you like the place?” Dave asked, struggling to keep his balance as Dirk tried to push him off. They were both clearly holding back smiles.

John laughed quietly at the scene before looking around. “It’s pretty cool.”

“Of course it is, I run the place.”

Dirk raised an eyebrow, finally deciding to just stand up to get his brother off him. “You run the place?” 

Dave grunted as he temporarily lost his balance. He managed to play it off by leaning against the counter he just stumbled into. “When Bro dies, then yeah, I will,” he said with a snarky look on his face.

Dirk just stared blankly at Dave. There was a sort of tension filling the air, like the twins were waiting for something to happen to them. Dirk glanced back and forth between Dave and John before gently hitting Dave on the forehead and turning his attention to John.

“So, Dave dragged you here for something?” 

John nodded, stepping closer to the counter. “Yeah! Something with dragons in it, right?”

Dave clearly didn’t want to stick around for this conversation, so he made his way to the back of the shop, leaving the pair alone. John could see Dave trip over something in the corner of his vision and had to hold back a giggle. 

“Oh, Dungeons and Dragons. Yeah, it’s a pretty cool game. Real easy on the player’s part, too. Just dice rolling and some, uh…” Dirk trailed off as he looked around. Apparently, he didn’t notice that Dave left. He turned back to John. “Uh… y’know, roleplaying, I guess.” He took off his bracelet and began fidgeting with it. 

“Oh, that’s cool. I think I can do that,” John responded, suddenly feeling a little awkward.

The two sat in silence for a moment before Dirk cleared his throat, standing up a little straighter. “Anyway, uh, yeah. Y’know, I’ve… played before. Mostly just… DMing. Runnin’ the game, writing the story… for it.”

John tilted his head to the side in confusion. “DMing?”

“Oh, um… Dungeon Master. They’re like, uh… I dunno how to explain it. DMs run the game. Write the story for it, make up non-player characters, all that jazz.”

“Oh, okay! That sounds pretty interesting.” 

Dirk nodded in response, leaving the two in a breath of silence.

“Do you know anyone that could teach me how to play?” John said before the silence got too long.

Dirk perked up at the question, turning his head slightly to stare out the window. “Nah, not really. I’m kinda the only person in… miles that’s experienced.” After finishing that sentence, he turned around, peering over to where Terezi was running her finger along the spine of a book. “... Besides Terezi. You don’t wanna learn from her.”

“I heard that,” she called as she pulled the book from the shelf. “Do you have this in braille?”

“Bro, just use the PDFs I sent you.”

“Pirating content is illegal.”

Dirk made a small, exasperated gesture with his hands, shaking his head slightly in confusion. “Then why did you ask for them?!”

Terezi giggled, and that was the only response Dirk got. He turned to back John, shaking his head. “I don’t know how we’re still friends. Anyway,” he huffed, gently tapping his knuckles against the countertop. “Uh… yeah, that’s… really about it.”

John pulled his hands out of his pockets and rested them on the countertop. He could see the faint movement of Dirk’s eyes from behind his shades as he tossed a glance at John’s hands. “I guess it’s settled then!”

Dirk seemed taken aback, face scrunching up slightly in confusion. “What’s settled?”

“The game. You could teach me how to play.”

Dirk stood still for a moment before quickly shaking his head, as if shaking away his surprise. “Uh– Yeah, sure. We can do that. I’ll… I can help you out with making a character, or something. It’s confusing at first.” 

John smiled. “Awesome! Thanks!” He stared at Dirk for a moment, not really sure what to do now. He’ll have to go get Dave to take him back home. 

The pair stood in silence before John perked up. “Oh! I should probably give you my number,” he laughed. 

“Oh, yeah, that’d… that’d be a good idea,” Dirk responded as he pulled out his phone.

They quickly exchanged numbers and John walked a little farther into the store to find Dave. 

Thankfully, he wasn’t doing much besides chatting to one of the customers about some game called… fiduspawn? He didn’t really want to know. He went over to Dave and poked him in the arm to get his attention. Dave almost instantly turned to face John. 

“What’s up?”

“Can you take me back home? My dad’s at work.”

“Oh, yeah, for sure.” Dave turned back to the person he was talking to. “I dunno, you’d probably do pretty good in a tournament with those cards. I’m not really into that whole scene, but the stats on these guys are fucked. Where’d you even find them?”

“Collectors. I know, they’re, like, really valuable, but they have perfect stats! How can I not use them?” 

Dave hummed. “Yeah, I guess. Well, good luck, man.”

“Thanks, I need it,” he laughed.

Dave turned back to John, elbowing him gently before walking to the counter. John followed after him, scrolling through all the silly pictures on his phone, looking for one to set as Dirk’s contact photo. He accidentally bumped into the counter, hissing in pain. Hasn’t he taken enough of a beating today?

“We’re outta here,” Dave said as he picked up his longboard.

“You just got here,” Dirk said, in the middle of helping a customer with a purchase. 

“Yeah, and now we’re outta here. My shift is tomorrow.”

Dirk shook his head gently before telling the customer to have a good day. He turned to look at Dave, the two of them seemingly exchanging words in complete silence. Or something.

“You blinked,” Dave said with a shit-eating grin.

“Oh my God. Fuck off,” Dirk responded, smiling ever so slightly. “Don’t crash your board.”

Dave started toward the front door, John following suit. “No promises.”

John gasped, gently punching Dave on the shoulder blade. “Hey, asshole! I’m riding with you! Absolutely promises!”

“Whatever, man. What’s gonna happen? Broken arm? Chipped tooth?” Dave swung the doors open all casual, like it was nothing. “Nothin’ a cast and painkillers won’t fix.”

John shook his head. He couldn’t help but smile at his stupid jokes. “Let’s just go already.”

Dave chuckled and set his board down, resting one foot on it. John turned around, staring through the clear doors at Dirk. He waved at him. Dirk looked up, glanced around, then waved back. John smiled a little wider and turned back around.

“Wow, already flirting?” 

John practically jumped out of his skin at the comment. “We just met! How was that flirting?!”

Dave just stared at him, raising his eyebrows in expectation. 

“I– shut up! I don’t even like guys!” John said that a little louder than he wanted to.

“Man, I’m just fuckin’ with you. Get on,” he said with a gentle laugh.

John grumbled and got on the board. He stared at the shop until it vanished behind other buildings. He pulled his phone out his pocket as he got a text from Dirk. He couldn’t help but smile.