#another 2 would straight up strangle themselves to find me in the afterlife and beat me back into life
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What if I, and let me hold your hand while saying this, simply perish, never to return.
#i hate writing a synopsis#i hate having obligations for uni that i want to do but my body violently and physically hates doing#WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE THING I DID A THOUSAND TIMES (writing 500 words w citations) IS MAKING ME VIOLENTLY CONVULSE AND RECOIL FROM THIS PLANE#is this a joke#i did 5 years with minimal impediments because i worked according to the “don't let your depression fuck things up”#ONLY FOR IT TO NEVER GO AWAY. I DID MY 5 YEARS OF MANDATORY SUFFERING AND NOW IT DECIDED TO NOT WORK?????#NOW WHEN I NEED IT MOST#POWERING THROUGH SEEMS TO HAVE LEFT THE CHAT#I am flying by the seat of my pants i pulled an all-nighter i have another exam i didn't stidy for bc it takes people a MONTH to prepare#and now i am Revising on the off chance i pass and have to read 7x100 pages plus 200 pages and prepare them for an oral exam that is basicly#“say everything you know related to x from y”#i so wish to give up rn you don't even have a CLUE but if i did that#at least 3 people would get an aneurysm and revive me just to slap me sensless#another 2 would straight up strangle themselves to find me in the afterlife and beat me back into life#and i would just feel really bad for wasting everyone's time by being a sensitive bitch so#i will just redbull & coffee my way through this and hope my synopsis gets accepted otherwise i just might go with plan a and jettison away#preferably of a tall building or a short rope#tw sui ideation#cw sui ideation#I don't know how to tag this but y'all get the gist y'all know what i mean
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