#anjdjejejdjrnr so GOOD

[omoghouls]

> Ocean is not an asshole and that’s important to me

Dying improves Ocean as a person. It is a major point in her character arc, that in death she has become a better person than she was in life but. Here’s the thing.

Ocean is continuously portrayed as self obsessed and as though she only likes the other choir members for the idea that they make her look better, bc of their perceived ‘inferiority,’ and I hate that sm, bc the way I perceived it she was never really selfish, as such- she just had a very specific idea of what she wanted to do with her life, and the means and academic (,if not emotional) intelligence to accomplish it.

(There’s a promo video in which Ocean says “look, I have a thirty year goal to be the first democratically elected prime minister of Canada” which literally makes me sob because. She never got to meet her thirty year goal-)

That, accompanied with her specific outlook on life, where she seems to base most of peoples worth off of academic achievement (shown in Karnaks joke abt her high grade point average being the reason she gets to have the final choice,) she comes across as self centred and that sort of thing.

She doesn’t really even improve that much, she just seemed to gain the emotional intelligence to comprehend and verbalise things she already sort of knew, and in death her conflicting personal morals (eg, the ‘and I am not even bragging about that bc that is against my Buddhist beliefs!’ speech) and views seem to solidify.

It’s why her having the ‘final say,’ but not being able to complete it (“you knew I wouldn’t be able to do it,” and the repeat of her “democracy rocks” catchphrase) is so important, because it’s when that reality of the choice she faces hits her.

Even if she does get closure, she has to choose between how she is perceived/the moral high ground, and the life she could have.

Given that she had her whole life planned out, having it not go that way must have been. Devastating on a scale I can’t even begin to imagine- especially bc the not going to plan, in this context, means ‘your life is on the line,’ and her having to pick between everything she’d ever known, and utter uncertainty- so again, moral high ground vs her life.

She picks moral high ground, in letting Jane/Penny return, despite how obviously it pains her to do so- which is why I hate sm when people disregard ‘every story has a lesson,’ bc sure, it’s a silly lighthearted song/scene, but it so clearly conveys so much about oceans character, in that she believes everything has to have meaning, and if she chooses to go back rather than letting Jane/Penny return, it nulls the meaning of Jane’s life, as she can’t remember it, and because her body was never claimed, nobody would remember it.

Also, if she voted for herself, Ocean would no longer be able to perceive herself as ‘a good person’ because of Ricky’s speech after SABM.

If she goes back, doing so will invalidate all the growth she goes through during the show- and adding onto song theme, every song in the musical is so important to me, because even the ‘silly ones’ have meaning- all the ones specially relating to ocean carry the central motif that everything Needs to have meaning.

Even in ‘the new birthday song,’ it’s shown again, in that Ocean sort of fabricates meaning for/humanises Jane, whereas before she’d only viewed her as ‘a freaky monster’ which made the choice that much harder, as her belief that she should be the one to go back started to become more unstable- and I see so many ppl hating every story has a lesson and the new birthday song and from like. An overall standpoint I can kind of understand it. But it makes me sad bc they’re so integral to ocean and her character arc !!

Also, all that aside, this is not a justification of some of the shit she says bc some of it is. Pretty fucked up- or at least, I disagree with the "her behaviour was understandable if you look hard and deep into her backstory and her parents and headcanon her certain ways, and therefore it was also okay,” because just bc smth is understandable and a valid reaction doesn't equal it being okay. Her behaviour is still shitty- which doesn't mean she is an Unforgivable Terrible Person. Like. the worst thing she's done is be kind of a bitch, vaguely ableist, very traumatised, and be dismissive of other people's feelings. Which like ????? She's a literal child! Depending on what part of the fandom you take your head cannons from, she is not even seventeen years old (or she’s closer to 18 but. i disagree with that timeline wise bc it doesn’t make sense in the overall plot)- but anyways. She’s a teenager!!! it’s normal to be a bit fucked up and have incorrect opinions- The point, for me is in that she learns and grows and starts seeing the humanity in others. And at the end she gives someone else a life at the cost of her own! That's a big deal! It shows she's grown and learned to see other people's humanity and treat them better, even if that doesn't get her what she wants. So. Yeah. Ocean is not an asshole. And that’s important.

- 🎢

Literally kissing you directly on the face MY GOD THIS IS SO GOOD AN AMAZING ANALYSIS OF HER ANNDJEJEIIWNWNWBSNDJDJ

And the end! Yes!! She's literally just a teenager, teenagers are growing, they've barley just left their childhood, ofc their view points are gonna be a bit skewed, they're growing!!! Even during the course of being in that limbo area, Ocean grows a lot, she gains different perspectives, something needed to grow!!!