#angels run a bureaucracy

[jealizmuch]

good omens 2 might have ruined the character (SPOILERS)

i am so distraught over good omens season 2 so i'm going to write this here in hopes that people see where i'm coming from. there will be SPOILERS in this post so if you don't want that please scroll

i love this show so much. it means so much to me i cannot even begin to explain but after seeing some fresh takes on s2 (from the book fans. all the book fans hated s2) i've realized that there are two things that i really didn't like in this season:

1) aziraphale and crowley being friends in heaven 2) crowley creating the universe.

both these things did not sit well with me (more specifically the latter though) their whole dynamic in s1/the book was them befriending each other despite being on opposite sides. that first scene in s2e1 completely threw all of that away. it got rid of the effect their supposed first meet once had on me in the pilot episode. did aziraphale only befriend crowley and maintain their relationship because he remembers the angel crowley used to be? if he'd never met crowley pre-fall would he have just disregarded him as common demon scum? and the whole point of good omens was that it doesn't matter what your upbringing is, whether it be angel, demon or human, it was your CHOICES that determined how "good" or "bad" you are. even the most seemingly "insignificant" of people could make a difference. that was why aziraphale and crowley being nobodies was so important to so many people. they were able to avert the apocalypse yet it wasn't like they were the leaders of heaven/hell or something. anyone could make a difference and good omens showed that. implying how powerful crowley must've been in heaven and offering aziraphale a job as heaven's ruler in s2 completely got rid of all of that. that made me really upset.

lots of people were upset about aziraphale accepting the job offer because they felt it was totally OOC and i COMPLETELY AGREE. this is why i also believe in the coffee theory, it makes the most sense. there's no way aziraphale would've thrown everything he had on earth with crowley away for a mere promotion. it wouldn't even make sense for him to be offered one; why would heaven want a traitor to rule? one of the key points of both seasons is how unfair and systematic both heaven and hell are; neither of them would offer such a thing to either aziraphale/crowley if they didn't have an ulterior motive.

otherwise i loved that season. i know some people felt it was fanficky but i like fanficky!! i love aziraphale and crowley and i really hope neil is able to wrap it up in s3 because if not i will be fucking devastated. i'm not even kidding when i say that i could physically feel my mental health degrading after s2 came out because what the hell

also i think gabriel and beelzebub are cute and all but it really came out of nowhere?? the amount of fanservice was great but i think some of it ruined the feel of the show for me... idk. yes i will forever be grateful for the 5 whole episodes we got of aziracrow fluff. no i am not over the ending or the fact that they were friends before crowley fell.

i'd love to hear your guys' takes

[mybookstorecarlovinghusbands]

THANK YOU! Finally, someone put my frustrations into words

Angels are completely unfit to run earth. Not that they are anyway. But the whole thing with Michael having no idea of what a matchbox is. Gabriel and Sandalphon showing up in the bookshop and asking for p*rnography in front of everyone, they don't know how humans breed,

And tbh they don't really seem to care.

The demons as well can't keep up with human kind. Shax is surprised at how easy everything is and hasn't quite got to grips with Earth despite having been there for..? How long? And Hastur didn't know what a computer was (admittedly it was the 80s but still, they were in existence and used widely).

But again, they don't seem to care.

So no wonder they're so happy to bring about armageddon however many times, and just use Earth as some kind of pawn in their weird war games. If they gave a damn like our ineffable husbands did, then maybe things would actually be better on Earth, and Heaven would be something that angels wouldn't fall from.

Idk

Just thoughts.

[inhonoredglory]

Aziraphale’s Choice, the Job Connection, and Michael Sheen’s Morality

Update: Michael Sheen liked this post on Twitter, so I'm fairly certain there is a lot of validity to it.

I’ve had time to process Aziraphale’s choice at the end of Season 2. And I think only blaming the religious trauma misses something important in Aziraphale’s character. I think what happened was also Aziraphale’s own conscious choice––as a growth from his trauma, in fact. Hear me out.

Since November 2022 I’ve been haunted by something Michael Sheen said at the MCM London Comic Con. At the Q&A, someone asked him about which fantasy creature he enjoyed playing most and Michael (bless him, truly) veered on a tangent about angels and goodness and how, specifically,

We as a society tend to sort of undervalue goodness. It’s sort of seen as sort of somehow weak and a bit nimby and “oh it’s nice.” And I think to be good takes enormous reserves of courage and stamina. I mean, you have to look the dark in the face to be truly good and to be truly of the light…. The idea that goodness is somehow lesser and less interesting and not as kind of muscular and as passionate and as fierce as evil somehow and darkness, I think is nonsense. The idea of being able to portray an angel, a being of love. I love seeing the things people have put online about angels being ferocious creatures, and I love that. I think that’s a really good representation of what goodness can be, what it should be, I suppose.

I was looking forward to BAMF!Aziraphale all season long, and I think that’s what we got in the end. Remember Neil said that the Job minisode was important for Aziraphale’s story. Remember how Aziraphale sat on that rock and reconciled to himself that he MUST go to Hell, because he lied and thwarted the will of God. He believed that––truly, honestly, with the faith of a child, but the bravery of a soldier.

Aziraphale, a being of love with more goodness than all of Heaven combined, believed he needed to walk through the Gates of Hell because it was the Right Thing to do. (Like Job, he didn’t understand his sin but believed he needed to sacrifice his happiness to do the Right Thing.)

That’s why we saw Aziraphale as a soldier this season: the bookshop battle, the halo. But yes, the ending as well.

Because Aziraphale never wanted to go to Heaven, and he never wanted to go there without Crowley.

But it was Crowley who taught him that he could, even SHOULD, act when his moral heart told him something was wrong. While Crowley was willing to run away and let the world burn, it was Aziraphale (in that bandstand at the end of the world) who stood his ground and said No. We can make a difference. We can save everyone.

And Aziraphale knew he could not give up the ace up his sleeve (his position as an angel) to talk to God and make them see the truth in his heart.

I was messed up by Ineffable Bureaucracy (Boxfly) getting their happy ending when our Ineffable Husbands didn’t, but I see now that them running away served to prove something to Aziraphale. (And I am fully convinced that Gabriel and Beelzebub saw the example of the Ineffables at the Not-pocalypse and took inspiration from them for choosing to ditch their respective sides)

But my point is that Aziraphale saw them, and in some ways, they looked like him and Crowley. And he saw how Gabriel, the biggest bully in Heaven, was also like him in a way (a being capable of love) and also just a child when he wasn’t influenced by the poison of Heaven. Muriel, too, wasn’t a bad person. The Metatron also seemed to have grown more flexible with his morality (from Aziraphale's perspective). Like Earth, Heaven was shades of (light?) gray.

Aziraphale is too good an angel not to believe in hope. Or forgiveness (something he’s very good at it).

Aziraphale has been scarred by Heaven all his life. But with the cracks in Heaven’s armor (cracks he and Crowley helped create), Aziraphale is seeing something else. A chance to change them. They did terrible things to him, but he is better than them, and because of Crowley, he feels ready to face them.

(Will it work? Can Heaven change, institutionally? Probably not, but I can't blame Aziraphale for trying.)

At the cafe, the Metatron said something big was coming in the Great Plan. Aziraphale knows how trapped he had felt when he didn’t have God’s ear the first time something huge happened in the Big Plan. He can’t take a chance again to risk the world by not having a foot in the door of Heaven. That’s why we saw individual human deaths (or the threat of death) so much more this season: Elspeth, Wee Morag, Job’s children, the 1940s magician. Aziraphale almost killed a child when he couldn’t get through to God, and he’s not going through that again.

“We could make a difference.” We could save everyone.

Remember what Michael Sheen said about courage and doing good––and having to “look the dark in the face to be truly good.” That’s what happened when Aziraphale was willing to go to Hell for his actions. That’s what happened when he decided he had to go to Heaven, where he had been abused and belittled and made to feel small. He decided to willingly go into the Lion’s Den, to face his abusers and his anxiety, to make them better so that they would not try to destroy the world again.

Him, just one angel. He needed Crowley to be there with him, to help him be brave, to ask the questions that Heaven needed to hear, to tell them God was wrong. Crowley is the inspiration that drives Aziraphale’s change, Crowley is the engine that fuels Aziraphale’s courage.

But then Crowley tells him that going to Heaven is stupid. That they don’t need Heaven. And he’s right. Aziraphale knows he’s right.

Aziraphale doesn’t need Heaven; Heaven needs him. They just don’t know how much they need him, or how much humanity needs him there, too. (If everyone who ran for office was corrupt, how can the system change?)

Terry Pratchett (in the Discworld book, Small Gods) is scathing of God, organized religion, and the corrupt people religion empowers, but he is sympathetic to the individual who has real, pure faith and a good heart. In fact, the everyman protagonist of Small Gods is a better person than the god he serves, and in the end, he ends up changing the church to be better, more open-minded, and more humanist than god could ever do alone.

Aziraphale is willing to go to the darkest places to do the Right Thing, and Heaven is no exception. When Crowley says that Heaven is toxic, that’s exactly why Aziraphale knows he needs to go there. “You’re exactly is different from my exactly.”

____

In the aftermath of Trump's election in the US, Brexit happened in 2018. Michael Sheen felt compelled to figure out what was going on in his country after this shock. But he was living in Los Angeles with Sarah Silverman at the time, and she also wanted to become more politically active in the US.

Sheen: “I felt a responsibility to do something, but it [meant] coming back [to Britain] – which was difficult for us, because we were very important to each other. But we both acknowledge that each of us had to do what we needed to do.” In the end, they split up and Michael moved back to the UK.

Sometimes doing the Right Thing means sacrificing your own happiness. Sometimes it means going to Hell. Sometimes it means going to Heaven. Sometimes it means losing a relationship.

And that’s why what happened in the end was so difficult for Aziraphale. Because he loves Crowley desperately. He wants to be together. He wanted that kiss for thousands of years. He knows that taking command of Heaven means they would never again have to bow to the demands of a God they couldn’t understand, or run from a Hell who still came after them. They could change the rules of the game.

And he’s still going to do that. But it hurts him that he has to do that alone.

[twilightcitysky]

Everything Is Meant (long S2 analysis, part 2)

Part one here

Okay, so that's how I think the pre-creation scene and Gabriel's arc connect to Aziraphale's choice. I also think the ineffable bureaucracy speedrun exists to prove totally different things to Aziraphale and Crowley: Aziraphale loves that they can love each other but notes they have to run away to be together; Crowley sees this and immediately thinks "hey, we can do that too!", forgetting that running away is not a solution Aziraphale has ever been interested in. It's the mentality of an individualist vs a group-oriented mind, and neither of them is necessarily wrong, it's just that their priorities are different and they HAVE TO TALK ABOUT IT, which they don't.

Continued analysis under the cut:

3. Let's take the Job minisode. Why include it? We already mentioned that it proves Aziraphale remembers Crowley as an angel, since he mentions it. And he believes Crowley is the same person he always was, and that he doesn't want to harm Job's crops or animals or children. Crowley tries to convince him he's a Big Bad Demon who is all in on this assignment, but fails utterly to kill even a single goat, soooo... Aziraphale comes to the conclusion that he knows what Crowley wants. Alert! Alert! This is a big problem! Crowley says, "What do you know about what I want?" Aziraphale: "I know you." Crowley: "You do not know me." But because Aziraphale got it right this time, he goes ahead assuming he'll always get it right, which is a crucial failure when it comes to the final reckoning. He doesn't ever ASK Crowley what he wants, he just assumes. When you assume you know what someone wants, you usually assume their priorities align with yours... he couldn't be more wrong about that. The Job minisode sets up this dynamic for them, and they never really manage to change it.

The other thing happens at the end of the minisode. Crowley acknowledges two crucial points: 1) he's lonely ("But you said it wasn't!" "I'm a demon. I lied"), 2) he doesn't think Aziraphale would like Hell. Aziraphale DOESN'T like Hell. Aziraphale hates Hell for what they've done to Crowley. He doesn't see Heaven as innocent or benign, but importantly, Heaven has never tried to hurt Crowley directly. They never threatened his safety. They never tortured him (as it's heavily implied that Hell did). Fast forward to the last ten mins of season 2: Aziraphale excited to tell Crowley that he can be an angel again BECAUSE: he never has to go back to Hell. They can never hurt him again, not the way they did before. And he doesn't have to be lonely anymore.

Last point before I leave Job: Crowley has the chance to cause Aziraphale to Fall, here, probably. ("I lied to Heaven to thwart the will of God!" "You did, but I'm not going to tell anybody. Are you? ...good, then nothing has to change.") He doesn't take it. He doesn't want Aziraphale to be a demon. He loves Aziraphale as he is. "Angel" as an affectionate. Aziraphale certainly doesn't use "demon" as a pet name for Crowley. I think they set up this scene to contrast the final one, and show how deeply hurt Crowley is that Aziraphale suggest he change.

4. Moving on to Victorian Scotland. This one confused me at first. I was delighted that they brought back the "the lower you start the more opportunity you have to rise" dialogue from the book, but apart from that I didn't really see the point of it. It seems like the statue of Gabriel and the fact that he and Beelz ended up at that pub in the present were more or less coincidental.

The point, I think, is actually not the girl, but the doctor. He's a person who is trying to do good by working in a system that's deeply flawed, and engaging in questionable moral practices for the greater good. (Cadaver dissection is still an essential part of medical school. You need dead bodies to understand living ones.) He shows Aziraphale a tumor he removed from a child who died, and Aziraphale clutches it to his chest. The camera zooms in and lingers to tell us that this is a guardian through and through. He wants to protect people. He wants to do good with every fiber of his being.

To Crowley, it's enough to just "be an us" with Aziraphale. He doesn't really want anything more than that. That's an issue! For one thing, it fosters unhealthy codependency, and for another, Aziraphale would never be happy without the opportunity to help and protect people. It's an essential part of who he is. Metatron knows that, and he plays Aziraphale like a fiddle. The doctor showed Aziraphale that you can make a difference even in systems that are flawed, and even if you have to do things you'd rather not do. Aziraphale doesn't want to go back to Heaven, but he truly thinks he can change things; thinks he can be a guardian with some real power. In his mind, that's the right thing to do.

Last thing that happens in Scotland: Crowley saves a soul from Hell, arguably, by preventing a suicide. He gets in Big Trouble. Whatever happened to him downstairs resulted in him coming back up, leaning on a cane, and asking Aziraphale to give him holy water. Go back and watch that scene knowing what we know now about the Victorian minisode. Ask yourself how Aziraphale must have felt. He likely blamed himself for what happened, because if he hadn't meddled then they never would have been there in the first place. He knew where Crowley was, and why he was there, and he had to sit with that knowledge for years. He desperately wants Crowley to be safe; is perfectly willing to push him away to keep him safe-- which is what he does do, the minute Crowley gets back.

Now think again about what Metatron offered him. A chance to keep Crowley safe forever. He'd never be harmed again. Aziraphale is going to take that offer, no matter what else is asked of him. He's shown over and over again that he'll sacrifice his own happiness to make sure nothing happens to Crowley. And he'll do it without talking to Crowley about it first, because he is a moron who doesn't know how to use his words. Leading Crowley to assume that Aziraphale doesn't love him. The idiot angel is doing it all out of love, but because he doesn't make himself clear Crowley doesn't know that.

Part 3: Maggie and Nina, and their roles as mirror couple/ Greek chorus!

[niiwa-angel]

Hazbin Hotel Incorrect Quotes

Vaggie, going over more ground rules for the hotel: Alright! We will be having weekly team dinners! Everybody will be taking a turn cooking!

Vaggie: Except Alastor, after the roast incident of April.

Alastor: You all said you wanted a shoulder roast.

Angel Dust: Pork shoulder, not Paul shoulder!

~~~

Alastor, calling a meeting: Listen up, you little shits.

Alastor: Not you Nifty, you're an angel and I'm happy you're here.

~~~

Valentino and Velvette, after losing Vox at the aquarium.

Val: He probably went to the shark tank. He likes sharks.

Vel: You're right.

Vel, laughing: He's probably in the shark tank, he likes sharks so much.

Val: Ha!

Both of them start running.

~~~

Husk: Hello, people who do not live here.

Cherri: Sup?

Husk: I gave you the key to my room for emergencies.

Frank the Egg Boi: We were out of molotov cocktails.

~~~

Charlie: What happens at Overlord meetings?

Alastor: Oh, you know. Boring discussions really. Lots of bureaucracy.

cut to the Overlord meeting

Vox, jumping up on the table: If you don't stop smacking me with your tail, I will end your entire family!

Zeezi: Bitch, try it!

Carmilla: Everyone sit down!

Velvette, recording: Can it old lady! This is gonna break the internet!

Clara smacks Velvette in the face with the handle of her spear: Don't talk to my mother like that!

Valentino: Don't smack my costume designer! She's getting blood all over her clothes!

Rosie, sampling: Tasty blood!

Alastor, also taking a taste: Indeed! Have you considered becoming a soup?

Zestial, fed the fuck up, slamming his hands on the table, effectively shutting everyone up.

Zestial: Sit. Down. Now.

Everyone sits down.

~~~

Lucifer: If you make your hot chocolate with water, you're out of the fucking hotel!

Lucifer: If you're lactose intolerant, you can stay but you're on thin ice!

Angel Dust: I just snort the powder because Vagina took my stash.

Lucifer: ...

Lucifer: What the fuck?

~~~

Velvette, kicking through the door to the Overlord meeting: Hello losers!

Carmilla, not looking up from her tea: Hello, problem attendant.

~~~

Valentino, watching Vox freak out because of something Alastor did.

Val: Is it a chocolate pudding at three am type of night?

Vel: Does the day end with 'Y'?

~~~

Charlie: Can you guys get along for five minutes?

Lucifer and Alastor: No!

~~~

Vox and Valentino, aggressively making out in the kitchen.

Velvette: Can I get a waffle?

Valentino, rips his underwear off

Velvette: Can I please get a waffle?!

~~~

Carmilla: I am this close to losing it.

Zestial: Mine dear, there is no room between thine fingers?

Carmilla, watching Vox and Alastor argue viciously while Velvette, Valentino, and Rosie egg them on.

Carmilla: Yep.

~~~

Velvette: Selfie with the fossil!

Velvette, drags Zestial in for a selfie.

Zestial, noticing the filter: What witchcraft is this?

~~~

Vaggie: Okay people! If you're going to have weird food in the fridge, it needs to be labeled as such!

Vaggie: Alastor, that means labeling your demon meat! Angel, that means labeling your edibles!

Nifty, raising her hand: Are my roaches okay?

Vaggie: We're actually going to get you a mini fridge for your room, because your roaches are creeping people out.

~~~

Charlie: I love you.

Vaggie: I love you too.

Pentious, from the wall: AWWWW!

~~~

Carmilla: Acceptable snacks to bring to the Overlords meeting; brownies, candy boards, cheese plates, and veggie trays.

Carmilla: Unacceptable snacks to bring to the Overlords meeting; anything made with demons, magic mushroom cereal bars, and penis shaped gummies.

Zestial, a spider: I am also not a fan of the mint tea.

~~~

Charlie: Okay! I know its funny that Alastor and I can't walk on ice, but that doesn't mean it's okay to freeze the hallway to watch us slip!

~~~

Husk: I have very high standards.

Angel Dust, pulling out a machine gun and opening fire.

Husk: Oh no! He's meeting all my standards!

[ao3cassandraic]

Kayfabe: A Good Omens meta

"Kayfabe," in wrestling, is the performance (including outside the wrestling ring) of whatever storyline is being woven around the wrestlers. Breaking kayfabe is Serious Business for a wrestler; the illusion is part of the event. If you ever wondered how John Cena could anchor an entire HBO miniseries brilliantly, kayfabe is a big part of the answer.

Because of their histories and how their respective Head Offices treat them, Crowley and Aziraphale approach their version of kayfabe -- their whole "I am an angel! You are a demon! We're hereditary enemies!" schtick, also their "we are good bad proper little footsoldiers, honest, Boss" schtick to their respective Head Offices -- very, very differently.

I promise there's a point to this. I PROMISE. But let me walk through it first.

Both of them know that one awkward question to Upstairs at the wrong moment and its Fallsville. Crowley, however, knows a couple of things that Aziraphale doesn't have to:

Punishment isn't just once; in some ways, the Fall is never over. Beelzebub or Hastur can throw you in the Dung Pits whenever, after all, or feed you to a Hellhound, or zap you like an Eric. Crowley's lot do not send rude notes. (s2: we do not know what happened to Crowley after Hell dragged him back at the end of the Resurrectionists 'sode, but I think it safe to say it was not great for Crowley. Litotes: your key to quality meta.)

Downstairs can and does check in -- or drag Crowley Downstairs for a chat and possibly a bit of idle torture -- whenever they feel like it. Downstairs seems pretty disorganized, especially its leadership, so I'd expect ad-hoc surprise inspections from them. Downstairs can invade Crowley's flat's TV, his Bentley's radio, and his very mind to perform those inspections. Crowley is never, ever safe from this. He can't relax. Ever.

Heaven, on the other hand, has 37 levels of scriveners and zero interest in Earth. Talk of "reprimands" and "miracle budgets" and Michael being a stickler and whatnot suggests a formal review process happening on a schedule, governed largely by the dreaded (but quite possibly fake-able or spinnable) "paperwork" rather than direct observation by Aziraphale's peers or superiors. Otherwise, Aziraphale is usually left to his own devices. Remember how startled he is when Gabriel shows up at the sushi restaurant in s1? This is unusual!

(We also know from Muriel that Heaven's records office doesn't seem to get consulted a whole lot. It's possible this just means that first-through-thirty-sixth-level scriveners handle everything, but in my experience of large bureaucracies, it's the folks at the bottom of the hierarchy who invariably get run off their feet first. Don't see why Heaven would be any different.)

Moreover, Heaven's punishments seem pretty light, on the whole? Our angel is so anxious and so sensitive to slights that I'm sure the reprimands aren't fun, and nobody likes a reduced miracle budget... but Heavenly "needs improvement" reviews don't seem to be a patch on the Dung Pits. The real threat is Falling, which is more than horrible enough to serve as deterrent; Heaven doesn't need to add torments.

Moreover moreover, Aziraphale is mostly aligned with his Head Office in a way that Crowley really, really isn't. I'm sure Aziraphale does a lot of his Heaven assignments with a song in his heart and a skip in his step -- it's mostly not smiting or the like. Crowley... probably spends a lot of his work time figuring out how to obey the letter of Hellish law while defying its spirit. Crowley's in far more danger of angering his bosses.

So Aziraphale doesn't have to keep up kayfabe a lot of the time, not even while interacting with Crowley. He can and does save it for the rare occasions Heaven takes a personal interest. Crowley, however, must keep up kayfabe always, whether Aziraphale's there or not. The courage it must have taken that snake to slither up the wall of Eden!

The way Crowley navigates his permanent need for kayfabe is twofold. First, his all but instinctive refusal to accept any positive word or compliment about himself or his actions from anyone ever -- "I'M NOT NICE!" If Hell were ever to hear someone characterizing Crowley that way... That's also why Crowley is a bit less exercised when Jimbriel calls him nice: "nobody'll ever believe you."

Second, a species of Orwellian doublethink: maintaining a running commentary in his head of how he's going to justify any unHellish actions to Hell, since he can never know exactly when he'll have to or what exactly they'll have a bug up their butt (sorry, Beez) about. Even high as a kite on laudanum in the Edinburgh cemetery, Crowley can explain his current justification (in a curiously sober voice -- is Crowley ever really high in that scene? or is it all kayfabe? I lean toward kayfabe) to Aziraphale, "Not kind! Off my head on laudanum, not responsible for my actions."

We can see the kayfabe mismatch play out a few times, and it does appear that Aziraphale gets more concerned for Crowley's safety and more aware of Crowley's need for kayfabe post-Arrangement. That doesn't mean he always remembers, of course -- he wouldn't, he just doesn't have that same desperate need. And, of course, the ineffable walnuts do not communicate, as s2 went to some lengths to point out. I do think kayfabe is part of that -- it's hard for Crowley to be sincere when he's constantly doublethinking, and Aziraphale's off-and-on involvement with kayfabe (and all his other tendencies toward lying) disincline him to achieve or even learn about honest communication.

One s1 scene I went back and rewatched while thinking about this was the Globe scene, which contains Aziraphale's Saint-Peter-esque three-time denial of Crowley. I find it easy now to read that as Aziraphale going "oh crap do I need to drop back into kayfabe now? I didn't break kayfabe, did I?" and Crowley grinning, at least partly as reassurance. (Partly, of course, because Aziraphale is cute and funny even when kayfabing -- and partly because Aziraphale's sudden drop into kayfabe is Aziraphale trying to protect Crowley, of course Crowley's pleased by that.)

The wall pin, now that I think about it, also gains a little nuance from this. Crowley's fear-laced ire is genuine, but how many times must Aziraphale have heard Crowley snarl at him not to break kayfabe in this way? No surprise he's a little unimpressed. (With Crowley's demand. He's clearly very impressed by Crowley.)

In the s2 Job minisode, Aziraphale hilariously drops kayfabe (and that epic whole-body halo, loved that, great job FX folks) almost immediately. Crowley allows it, because Crowley is on firm ground -- Hell will be just fine with Crowley wrapping the angel in a Chuck-Jones-cartoon amount of scroll parchment and flipping him off.

When angel and demon collude on the con later, of course, they observe kayfabe, improv-style -- Crowley helps Aziraphale deal with the Job's-children situation without giving either of them away to the watching angel posse. Interestingly, it's Aziraphale who de-gecko-izes the kids. That gives Crowley an out, sort of: "look, the mansion collapse missed them because they were in the cellar, I turned them into geckos, totally Hellish thing to do, they'd never survive in the wild, but then this bloody interfering angel went and changed them back!"

And how does Crowley console a distraught angel who thinks he's about to be dragged to Hell? Crowley explains kayfabe in the fewest and clearest words possible. "Well, yeah, you did, but... I'm not going to tell anybody. Are you?"

So yeah. That's kayfabe for the Ineffable Walnuts.

But I promised there was a point to this, didn't I? Yes, I have a point.

My point is...

my POINT is...

my point IS...

(not dolphins, not this time)

My point is, how much of s2's Final Fifteen Minutes is kayfabe?

That's my point.

[alargehunkofdebris]

the necessary anguish of the Good Omens 2 finale

Ah ok. So after 4 years of waiting post Season One and ten cumulative years of bookish fannery, I watched bonified New Content of Good Omens. And when those credits rolled, I sat there, not in my expected state of pleasant satisfaction, but in a state of abject shock.

I actually don’t know if I’ve ever had such a reaction to a show before. Or, rather, that I could still have such a reaction. I’m thirty, for goodness sakes – I was planning on being thrilled and charmed and entertained, not having my hands shake so much that it was hard to type a text. I wasn’t planning on losing an entire night of sleep because my heart wouldn’t stop pounding really hard, Neil. This was not expected. I had an estate sale to run the next day – by God, I needed that sleep.

 Anyway. These are my thoughts on the season, and on this upswell of mourning/unhappiness at such a gut-wrenching ending. As always, this are my dumb opinions and nothing more; take with a grain of salt, etc. 

I have seen a lot of suffering on Tumblr today. Everyone is in pain, and it makes sense. I, too, am in pain. But I might be in the minority, because I thanked God/Mr. Gaiman when things turned to pure pain in the end. Because narratively, despite the anguish we all feel, this is how it needs to be. And I was getting real worried there for a second.

When we have a mini-series (ie, a show with a set number of seasons) it can’t act the same as a series without a set end. We’ve got three potential seasons; therefore, they logically should behave like a three-act play, or the three acts in the standard Western movie/book plot. This middle season is the middle act, the second act. While it definitely doesn’t work exactly the same way, and needs its own story arc to work as a season, it is still functionally the middle part of one overarching plot.

And what usually happens near the end of the second act? All Is Lost, and the Dark Night of the Soul.

We NEED this to happen. This is what makes a plot delicious. If we’d had this perfect, lovely, romantic season where the stakes aren’t raised one bit and everything is fixed at the end, we would want for nothing and the gorgeous tension that keeps us waiting and watching would be lost. We wouldn’t feel that drive to create fanfics and fanart, we wouldn’t have the need to speculate or dream, because most of the tension was eased, and you just can’t have that if you want a highly anticipated third season. We’d have nothing huge and concrete to look forward to.

In fact, I was getting really worried once the Ineffable Bureaucracy started happening on screen, because I could see (I thought) past that bend in the road toward the end. I could see how this season might conclude, with big happy confessions of love and hugs and handholding (that’s all I expected, because I only expected the same chaste level of affection with both angelic/demonic couples) and then…then it’d all be over. What more could there be? I mean, there certainly could be more, but THIS is the main thing people waited for. The Happy Confession. The hug. The handholding. Whatever we got. And in my mind, having it now, at the end of season two, just wasn’t adding up – it did not fit. It couldn’t. No, we can’t have this now. It doesn’t work.

I get this peculiar thing that happens when things start getting too “everything is great!” in a story. I get the “someone needs to die” instinct. Instead of pure happiness that things are going great, there’s this feeling of intense discomfort, because I feel the weight of the shoe that’s failing to drop. I need it to drop, or else it throws off my entire standard-Western-narrative-trained brain’s balance. In the build up to The Scene, when things seem to be going swimmingly and heading directly towards the happiest and syrupiest of endings, I had to pause and pace my living room and roll around on the floor to alleviate the sheer build up of stress. Things can’t go this well. They can’t. There hasn’t been enough bad things, this is too sweet, too much. Can’t handle it. This can’t just be pure wish-fulfillment at this point; Good Omens shouldn’t work that way, it never has. We’d be happy in the moment, but then it’ll ultimately be a let down. No more danger. Nothing keeping them apart. No more tension, no more story. It was all too easy.

And then, finally, that shoe dropped. After a season of mainly getting along and being just thrilled with each other, they began to really argue. Things got horrific and serious, and I literally let out a breath of relief. I was able to watch without pausing every two minutes for a breather. Ok. Things weren’t over. This wasn’t the end. We had more to wait for.

And then it went on. The confession started, but in that gorgeously wrong way. And for the first time that season, I was actually feeling the stress of the story. Yes, there was danger throughout this season, but it was always layered with humour and wit. You didn’t get a demon scene without them doing something hilariously stupid. You didn’t get an angel scene without them being delightfully out-of-touch. The stakes were high, but they weren’t allowed to get EXTREMELY high. We never thought there was any question of them getting out of scrapes unscathed, because it was never all serious.

Never…until now. There was zero humour at this point. After 6 episodes of being pleasantly delighted, I was feeling the dread. However, I still thought I knew where it was going.  

See, I thought I had it figured out. If I had any extra money, I would have bet some of it. I knew that, whilst they’d likely have some kind of subtle confession of love and caring, and perhaps a touch – a hug, or a hand-hold (like Gabe and Beez) – I knew we couldn’t expect a kiss. This is a story thirty-three years in the making, and it’s always been in that grey area. They weren’t humans; they didn’t necessarily show affection that way. Besides that, we’ve had so many TV shows that get close, but rarely ones that go all the way to smoochville. OFMD was one of the very first, but it was new. It wasn’t an old, established story from the 90s like this is. It didn’t have decades-old fans waiting with bated breath for canon content. For Good Omens, we heard it time and time again in interviews; it’s a kind of love story. They had this kind of marriage. They cared for each other. They had a bromance. It’s close, but never quite there. So I thought I knew exactly how this would go, and would be thrilled with what we got. 

And then it absolutely didn’t go that way. It went exactly as far as so many hoped. And it went there like a knife to the gut.

And it was perfect.

Goddamn, what a season ending. Despite my lack of appetite and failure to sleep, I could not be happier with what Mr. Gaiman did. I am screaming crying throwing up and I’m thrilled about it.

The middle of a story is typically what drags; it never holds the highest stakes. Lord knows what we’re going to get in season three (knocking on wood), but I can only expect it to get bigger and heavier. And by God and/or Satan, am I prepared, in this deliciously painful purgatory, to wait and see.  

[seravphs]

ੈ♡˳·˖✶ — GUARDIAN ANGEL! GOJO x FEM READER 

Kneeling by your bed, rosary wrapped around your knuckles, lips pressed to the burnished rosewood, you pray. 

God, please send me another guardian angel. 

A blast of static from the TV behind you. 

The one you sent me- 

“Hey, how does the thing work?” Gojo says, accompanied by loud thumps. You cringe in silence. 

He’s strange. 

wc — 3.7k

tags — religion, Gojo has to reckon with the consequences of being the strongest, domesticity, attempted (failed) mugging/attack, Gojo kills a man for you (non graphic), Shoko’s a good friend, bs angel lore, I think of this like a prequel to reader’s villain arc lol,  title from closer by nine inch nails 

You wake up to a man standing over your bed. Understandably, you scramble backwards, hands over knees over legs over feet, all your limbs tangled together, until you bump into your headboard. 

“Hi!” He says cheerily. “Wow, haven’t gotten that reaction in a while, not since- Anyways. I’m Gojo Satoru, your guardian angel. Please make breakfast, it’s 12 pm already and I’m starving. Your sleep habits are terrible.” 

You shake, terrified. Nothing he said has gone through your brain.

“Um, hello? Deep breaths now. It’s really not that serious, can you stop that? Hellooooo,” he’s snapping his fingers in front of your face, trying to get through to you. 

You panic and bat his hand away, but if you can touch him, that means he’s real. You’re not dreaming. There’s a strange man in your house calling himself your guardian angel. You try to pull yourself together enough to make a coherent sentence. What comes out is: 

“Um. Guardian angel. What?” 

“You don’t believe me,” he says. 

You’ve heard it can be dangerous for people suffering from delusions to be forcefully brought out of their dreams. “No,” you say carefully. “I’m sure this is all a big understanding.” 

“No, that’s okay,” he laughs. “I love getting to do this.” 

Massive wings unfurl from his back. It’s a strange sight. The air seems to ripple around them, iridescent ebbs and flows of the universe to make space for the impossible. They seem to sprout right out of his shoulder blades. 

It’s undeniable, irrefutable proof. Your brain can’t process this. It goes back to sleep. 

You wake up to the smell of bacon burning in the kitchen. 

Gojo hums as he cooks, his wings out. You’re almost worried they’ll get caught in the flames when suddenly you have something much more real to worry about. 

“Ow!” He’s about to stick his finger into his mouth when you intervene, scolding him without even thinking about it. 

“That’s dangerous! Don’t put your hands in your mouth, especially not if you’ve been cooking. Come here,” you tug him over to run his hands under the faucet. 

“Who's the guardian angel again?” He teases, amused. 

You answer him with another question. “Why are you cooking, anyways?” 

“You’re starving me! It’s so late and you haven’t made breakfast yet - you know I could report you to the authorities for angel abuse, right?” 

Somehow, you don’t believe him. There may very well be a division in heaven’s bureaucracy dedicated to looking after angels, but something about Gojo is just on the edge of unbelievable, like if you blink too hard, it might disappear without a trace. It’s the wings, probably. 

You’re good at compartmentalizing, so you ignore all of the normal reactions someone would have to an angel randomly appearing in your apartment to instead make breakfast. Gojo already burned your favorite pan, so you stick it in the sink to soak while you rummage around for your second best set. Then you check the fridge. You’re out of butter and eggs. There are just two pieces of bacon left. Is it presumptuous to ask your angel to run errands with you? 

You poke your head out of the fridge to look at Gojo, staring remorsefully at the burnt remains of his once-was-an-egg. He’s nursing the cut on his finger. 

“Do you want to go grocery shopping?”

He smiles at you, slow and syrupy and- 

He can’t do that. He’s beautiful as it is, as if God took extra time crafting him. Smiling only makes his beauty all the more painful, tugging at the strings of your heart. His snow white hair curls against the nape of his neck, a ruthlessly cute detail you notice when he tilts his head at you. 

“I would love to. What’s grocery shopping?” 

Introducing Gojo to the modern world is an exercise in both patience and childish wonder. There’s so much he doesn’t know. He tells you the last time he’s been on Earth was somewhere back in the 90’s.

“Like 1990? That’s pretty recent,” you remark. 

“Like 90 CE.” 

He’s delighted by everything, even the simplest of snacks, and begs you to add them to your cart. Ramune impresses him to no end. He’s enthralled by the taste of ice cream after the nice worker gives him a sample. You might really be reported to the Bureau of Angel Abuse at this point - all he’s interested in is junk food. It takes a while to finally wrangle him away from everything. In a way, it’s your fault because you hesitate to refuse an angel anything, and Gojo wants it all. You only manage to get him to agree to go home once you’ve tired him out. 

There was a sense of reverence, at first. 

There’s an angel living in your home. It’s hard to imagine getting used to that. Walking into the bathroom to the sight of Gojo brushing his teeth shirtless, his wings out, is a sight that will never get old. He manages to transform even the mundane into the divine. The sunlight strikes his hair at just the right angle to glow, giving him a faux-halo. 

“Good morning,” he smiles. “I think I used up all your toothpaste.” 

By day seven, you’ve wised up to Gojo’s tactics. If you don’t say no to anything, he’ll steamroll right over you, so you have to grow a backbone. 

“Oh, Christ? Yeah, we’re old pals. We go wayyyyy back.” 

“Please be quiet while I’m trying to pray.” 

“We’re in the same therapy group, actually. He texts me all the time for advice-“ 

“Gojo. Shut. Up.” 

He’s silent for all of a minute before he pipes up again. “I don’t think capital G up there would appreciate that.” 

You have never missed a day of prayer in your life. No temptation has been able to sway you from your duties. Hunger, thirst, and pain all were swept away in the face of your faith. Were you seriously about to start now, being annoyed to death by a particularly useless angel? 

The best solution to Gojo is always to ignore him. He needs attention like flowers need water. 

Without it, he stalks off to sulk. 

It’s night by the time he returns. He’s flying, which you usually don’t allow him to do, but you’ve driven out to a more remote, private church to pray. It’s owned by an old family friend, who handed you the keys without question. Half of this is for you, to experience god in the sanctity of nature, and half is for Gojo. You hate seeing him cooped up. Part of you feels like you’ve chained him down. You’re a trap in the form of a human, made to keep him grounded. 

He touches down next to you, hair slicked to his forehead in sweat. When he stretches his arms, his wings move simultaneously. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him look more alive. He loves nothing like he loves flying, and you’re inclined to agree. 

Maybe you’ll let him take you for another ride tonight. You love the feeling of the wind against your face, the sight of the landscape beneath you when he takes you up, the feeling in your stomach when he tucks his wings in and free-falls for fun. You’re not scared. Gojo would never let anything happen to you. 

You might ask, later. Now, you send him off to the car ahead of you while you lock up. He’s cheerful as he heads off, whistling merrily. You’re glad flying has improved his mood. It’s equally painful for you whenever he’s upset with you. Perhaps it's simply a side effect of being a guardian angel .

The key is in the door when you feel the first hint of danger. 

“All the money in your pockets, ma’am.” 

Polite, for a thief. 

“You’re not from around these parts.” He says as you spin around. “Should’ve known better than to go wandering around these woods alone. Whatever happens next is on you, sweetheart. If only you’d been a little more careful.” 

He has a knife. 

“What do you want? Money? You can have it.” It doesn’t matter much to you. As long as he leaves before Gojo comes back. 

“Sometimes, ma’am, men don’t want anything but a thrill.” 

Then he lunges at you, presses you against the wall, and pins you with a knife to your throat. 

���Don’t scream now. No one would hear you anyways.”

He’s wrong about that part. 

You hear him coming up the path before you see him. 

“What’s taking you so long?” Gojo whines. “I wanna go home and watch Love Island already-oh.” 

“Run!” Gojo might be an angel, but you’ve seen him cut himself making toast. He can bleed like any other man, gold ichor, yes, but blood still. You don’t want to see him hurt. 

Instead, he sizes up your assailant, unfurls those beautiful wings - they always take your breath away - and in one swift move, simply tears you from his grasp. It’s faster than you can blink. 

The man makes a muffled sound of fear and shock as Gojo seems to blink back into existence. You know he’s only moving too fast for your brains to comprehend. 

“Stay here,” he deposits you on the grass behind him. It’s scorched, burned black from the temperature of his wings. 

He turns up the heat. You didn’t think it was possible, but he was clearly holding back. The air seems to melt around him, heat waves shimmering off his skin, his white feathers. They glow with an otherworldly light, radiating heat. 

You didn’t know true glory until this moment, and it frightens you. All other versions of blue fade in favor of Gojo’s eyes - a single, unyielding truth. He is a piece of heaven on earth, burning up. His anger is righteous. Holy. His true nature melts away his human appearance. 

He’s a seraph, one of the highest order of angels.  

You’ve never seen him fight before, don’t know how he gets his weapons or where he puts them. It just appears out of thin air. He carries a flaming sword in one hand, its pommel is white marble, its blade glass. Contrary to common belief, his voice doesn’t boom. In fact it’s all the more threatening because it is soft, a whisper so clearly heard it defies the laws of the world just because it can. 

He raises the sword like an executioner and judge all in one. 

You barely have time to close your eyes in horror when you realize what he’s about to do. 

Real angels are not like the watered down, commercialized ones you can find today in any young adult TV show. Real angels are bloody. Real angels are the hand of God, ruthless and violent.

Real angels have no mercy. 

You open your eyes again when you feel the now familiar heat on your skin. 

He’s standing before you, beaming. It’s clear he expects praise. In heaven, it might’ve been given to him. 

You can only stare at him in fear, not awe.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” He steps closer, his burning wings flapping. “It’s okay. I got rid of him. You’re safe now.” 

You’re ashamed a split second after it happens because it’s so pathetic, but you can’t help it. Your animal instincts react instinctively to the threat, sending you skittering back on your palms and ass away from him. 

He freezes. His wings remain moving. Perhaps, like a shark and its gills, he simply can’t stop. 

“You’re afraid of me,” he says, stunned. “Why are you afraid of me?” 

The heat from his wings is baking your face. You’re afraid if you speak, your skin will crack. Still, Gojo shows no signs of leaving you alone. If anything, he’s about to get closer. 

“Stop,” you squeak. You throw out your hands in front of you like the world’s most useless shield. Your eyes are watering from looking into his radiance. 

Helpless, Gojo does something he hasn’t done since he was just a newborn angel. 

He asks for help. 

Shoko Ieri looks nothing like him, so that answers one question you’ve always had. Gojo tells you she’s another angel, although you don’t see her wings past the first minute you’ve met. After Gojo summons her to the scene and she catches the way you look at him, she keeps them carefully folded in. 

She helps you into the passenger seat when you can’t make your legs move to walk back to your car. You won’t let Gojo touch you, feeling torn at the look on his face when you flinch back from him. 

He’s sitting on a stool at the island while Shoko checks you over for injuries in the kitchen. There’s no major damage, just the after effects of shock and adrenaline working through your system. 

“You know I’d never hurt you, right?” He says, hurt and confused. 

“You fucking idiot. You colossal blockhead. You-“ Shoko pauses, not because she’s run out of things to say, but because she has too many. “It’s not about you, right now, okay? I know it’s hard for you to get your head out of your ass, but can you at least try to be supportive?” 

Gojo makes a noise like he wants to protest, but you shift your weight and that draws his attention back to you. The look on your face makes him fall silent.

Shoko leaves after she’s completed her examination, though she doesn’t leave you helpless. 

“Do you want to come with me?” She says, carefully. “I understand if you don’t want to be left alone with him right now.” 

You shake your head. 

“Listen, I know Gojo scared you. I’m sorry. He shouldn’t have. He’s always been too reckless - ugh. The stories I could tell you. But I promise you, he will never hurt you - not just because he cares about you, but because he’s literally not allowed to. He’s your guardian angel.” 

“I know,” you say, and that’s the end of that. 

There’s an uncomfortable silence after Shoko leaves. You’re not sure how to navigate the once easy relationship between you and Gojo now. Always unable to keep still, he breaks the silence first. 

“Do you want to talk about it now?” He says softly. Everything about him is dulled, even the gleam of his brilliant hair. He’s back within his human skin, even more modestly than before, as if he has taken care to seal up every crack that his true nature could spill out of. 

You choose your first question carefully. “Why has the lord sent a seraph to watch over me?” 

Seraphs are the highest level of the hierarchy of angels. They maintain the order of the world, fulfilling God’s will. For one to have come to you- 

True horror is sinking in. You love your saints. You worship them devoutly, knowing each story by heart. You could trace a path through the church library of all the books you’ve read on them, giving the history of each spine. 

You do not want to be one of your saints. 

Joan of Arc died at 19. Saint Agatha was canonized for being tortured violently.

By sending you such a strong protector, your lord may be condemning you to die young, but that’s not why you cry. You cry because you are too weak to fulfill his command. 

Life is sweet. You don’t want to give up the taste of tart oranges on your tongue, the feeling of the babbling creek over your feet, the songs of the birds in the morning. You don’t want to give up Gojo’s wake up calls, or the feeling of flying. 

All these selfish, worldly pleasures should mean nothing to you when faced with the lord’s call, and yet- 

You resent it still. 

You’re so confused by it all. Why were you given such a burden and told nothing about it? What does any of it mean? 

“I don’t know. I’m sorry. We don’t get told anything but who we were assigned to.” 

“Okay,” you say. 

“That’s it? Okay? I scare the shit out of you, and all you have to say is okay?” 

“Gojo, I don’t want to fight anymore. Let me just go to bed, please.” 

You’re woken up not by the light of Gojo’s halo, as you’ve gotten used to when he comes to your room demanding breakfast, but by the sun. The curtains are open, and sunbeams stream in over your pillow. 

Gojo is in the kitchen making - not burning - breakfast. He doesn’t turn when you pad into the kitchen on slippered feet, but you know he knows you’re there. You’re feeling much better. Sleep has refreshed you from the major shock to your system last night, and now you feel almost half bad for your reaction to him. He only wanted to help you, after all. 

It’s not his fault he’s strong. At the end of the day, he’s just another gear in the universe, like you. Neither of you are important enough to be privy to the greater, divine plan, not even a seraph. You shouldn’t have snapped at him. You’re in this together. 

You stand on tiptoe behind him to peer over his shoulder into the pan. 

“I’m making you breakfast,” he says. Is it just you, or does he seem almost shy? 

What an impact you’ve had on him. Your heart breaks. You’ve only known him to be bold and uncaring of human customs like politeness. You didn’t think it would upset you to see him learn manners, and yet- 

It’s a consequence of your rejection last night, as if he’s worried you’ll pull away again. This isn’t what you wanted, ever. 

“We should talk,” you say. 

“Yeah. We should.” He still won’t turn around, avoiding eye contact. 

Before you can speak, he blurts out, “ Do you not want me to be your angel anymore?”

“Of course not,” you say, reaching out for him. He’s hesitant to let you pull him closer, take his hands in yours. “Gojo, why would you think that?” 

“You’re scared of me,” he says, almost petulantly, like a sulking child. “You don’t like me anymore.” 

“Gojo,” you can think of nothing to say but his name. Sweet Gojo. Selfish Gojo. Gojo, who you’ve gotten used to having around. Gojo, who has infiltrated your life and now thinks to leave like you can kick him out like that. Like you would. Gojo, who you’re fond of in a way you can’t articulate, despite the way he takes and takes from you. Gojo, who you’re willing to keep, despite everything. 

Gojo, who you care about, enough to want him to stay. 

Gojo, who cares about you, enough to want to leave. 

He takes this like a rebuff and wrenches his hands out of yours. 

You grab his face and forcefully drag his attention back to you. His eyes are wild like a trapped animal, but there’s no sign of fire. He’s carefully dampened any kind of godliness in him.

“Oh, Gojo. Please don’t. I want you with me, I promise. I would never ask you to leave.”

“You don’t have to,” he says grimly. A soldier to the end. He knows how to do the hard things. Sometimes, you have to cut the rot out before the wound festers. 

“I am scared of you - please don’t make that face. You’re breaking my heart.”

“Your heart? What about mine?” He bristles. 

“I trust you. Let me prove it. Take your wings out again. Show me your true self.” 

“After seeing how you reacted?” He scoffs, turning defensive. You’ve exhausted his goodness, and now his emotions are getting the better of him, making the situation ugly. But you knew this would happen. 

You know him. 

And you know how to deal with him. 

“Come on,” you say.  “Think of it like exposure therapy.” 

“I don’t want to see you look at me like that again,” he admits.

“I know you won’t hurt me,” you say. “Please. Do you trust me?” 

He ends up on the ground cross legged, his wings spread, back to you. His wings are fiery, but carefully controlled. He won’t burn you. 

You start small, running your hands all over his wings. They rustle underneath your touch like startled animals. When you tug gently at the ends, extending them to their full length, you realize how monstrous his wingspan truly is. From tip to tip, they’re larger than a grown man is tall. Your fingers creep along the thin ridge of his radius, deceptively thin beneath your fingers. If you didn’t know better, it would snap easily with just the barest hint of pressure. 

He makes a small noise. You jerk back, worried you’ve actually bent the bone, but he’s fine. He pushes his wings back under your hands like a puppy seeking attention. 

From the radius, you trail along the top edge to his metacarpus, then down to his feathers, all the way back to his scapula. From there, it’s only a few inches over to his actual shoulder blades. He shudders when you touch him there, your fingertips lightly grazing over the bone. You press down gently. His muscles flex under your skin, tense and wound up. 

You realize that he's been suspiciously quiet for a while. He’s too still, as if he’s purposely holding himself in place. Have you hurt him without knowing? Would he tell you if you had?

“Gojo?” You pull your hands away from his wings and he shudders as if he’s been burned. “Look at me.” 

He won’t turn, so you grab him by the chin and force his head up so you can look him in the face. Even down on the floor like this, he’s tall. His face is pink, his eyes wide like he’s been stunned. He looks almost like he’s in pain.

“What’s wrong? Why didn’t you say anything? Does it hurt?” You fret over him. 

“Doesn’t,” he says hoarsely. “Feels too good.” 

You freeze. It’s this sight of an angel in all his celestial grace wrecked by your touch, brought down by just the brush of your fingers, that makes you realize it. 

It feels good to have an angel at your feet. 

[aziraphales-library]

Hey y’all! i know its pretty soon after this whole ‘do that again’ quote happened, so i understand if you wanna wait a bit before trying to find any, but id love if you could put together some alternative s2 ending fics based off that quote scenario. thank you in advance!

Here are all the "do it/that again" fics I could find...

insatiable by thechesapeakegripper (NR)

“Words only seem to die on his tongue while he tries over and over to speak, say anything, whatever he can to ease the deep-rooted ache now splattered across Crowley’s features as they part. It’s something that he’s never seen before, but can only be described as hopelessly, painfully human.” obligatory “do it again” fic :3

do it again by luciferfemme (T)

The kiss is electric. A fire burning deep inside of Aziraphale’s soul. One that has been burning for six thousand years. It should scorch him. Incinerate and destroy him. It’s hellfire surely, but he feels more alive than he has ever felt in his entire life. The kiss electrifies him. It’s as shocking as it is enticing and one thought rings true above the others. Do that again. Please.

do it again please right now by penmarks (G)

rob wilkins said on a panel that aziraphale's reaction to the kiss was, in his mind something along the lines of "please do that again right now i am trying to understand what's happening" and we all lost our collective minds on twitter. here's my little take on it

what are we going to do? by punkboiii (G)

A rewrite of the confession/kiss scene at the end of Good Omens season 2. “I for-” he stutters, “I… I fo- I forgive-” Aziraphale stops mid sentence, before holding his head in his hands. “Oh, God!” he sobs, “Oh! Oh, Crowley.” Crowley cautiously takes a step forward. “Crowley, please! Do it again. Right now, please Crowley,” he begs, finally looking up at them.

Please Crowley. Do It Again. by alessiazz (NR)

"Angel, what do you want? Tell me what to do, I can't..." And Aziraphale said it. For one time, he was honest about what he truly wanted. And he wanted... no, that's not the right word, he needed him. All of him. "Do it again. Please, Crowley. Do it again" And he did as he was told. ________ Or: what if Aziraphale actually said "Again. Do it again" after the kiss?

love is going to lead you by the hand by mygalfriday (T)

In all their time together, Aziraphale has grown used to the many and varied ways Crowley looks at him. Mercurial creature that he is, Crowley never runs out of emotions and his face displays them all so clearly. Never, in the whole history of their long acquaintance, has Crowley ever looked at Aziraphale the way he looks at him now.

"This isn't how it was supposed to happen" by Caztiel (E)

What if Aziraphale did change his mind after the kiss? Inspired by Mr. Wilkins saying that Micheal's face meant "do it again".

The Resurrectionnists by CaptainBlou (E)

Do it again. It all started with three words. Aziraphale couldn't resist saying them, and Crowley obliged. Do it again.

Snogging on Heaven's Door by Tetrisbiene (M)

What if Aziraphale actually said, 'Do it again. Please. Right now!'? A Post-Season 2 Fanfic. Aziraphale has to go to Heaven to thwart the Second Coming, and Crowley just can't let him go alone. Follow the pair as they meet old and new faces, go to heavenly meetings, sow mischief, and tempt some angels to fall in love with humanity. May the two find a flat surface to talk things over with each other before this big promotion can tear them apart. This is the story of our ineffable idiots in a roller coaster ride of emotions, heavenly bureaucracy, and stolen kisses against doors. Have some angst, some stupid puns in the chapter titles, and an elevator ride that's basically an excuse for me to write a cheesy alternative ending to help me get over the actual finale.

- Mod D

[mypointisineffable]

Ineffable Bureaucracy

When I saw the Ineffable Bureaucracy happening in S2, I wondered how those people nailed it. Then, on my S1 rewatch I figured it out with some key points.

First, Gabriel tries to justify the pics of Aziraphale and Crowley together, saying that maybe there's a "perfectly innocent explanation". For him, a Duke of Hell and the Supreme Archangel interacting from time to time is not that bad, why can't an angel and a demon do so as well?

Also, Gabriel might be one of the few Celestial Beings that sometimes spend time on Earth, as we know he likes to run in the park. So, if Beelzebub and Gabriel have casual meetings, the only place to do so is Earth, they know they won't get caught there.

And in the S1 final episode, they both talk to each other very casually. Remember in S2 when Archangels and Demons are in Aziraphale's book shop making disgust faces to one another? Well, Gabriel and Beelzebub are not, on the day the Armageddon is stopped. On the contrary, they talk like they've been having conversations and sharing thoughts several times. Too comfortable to each other's presence.

I guess that everything we saw in S2 is not taken out from nowhere, I can see where it comes from.

One thing is for sure, I take my hat off to those visionary people who saw it coming and got this ship right.

[covid-safer-hotties]

Also preserved on our archive

A lot of good sources linked in the original article!

By Bruce Mirken

As the dangers of Long COVID become more recognized, the country's going backwards on preventing new infections.

While I’m far from the only person worried about Long COVID and our society’s general inclination to look away and pretend it’s not there, people like me certainly feel badly outnumbered. It’s beginning to feel reminiscent of how people with AIDS and their loved ones felt circa 1986—and maybe it’s time for the same kind of response.

For those of you lucky enough not to have lived through that era, by the end of 1986, AIDS had killed nearly 25,000 Americans, but president Ronald Reagan had yet to speak the word “AIDS.” His press secretary had joked about it and the White House press corps laughed. While individual scientists were doing important work, the bureaucracies running the NIH and FDA seemed very much to be in business-as-usual mode. Because the casualties had largely been gay men and injection drug users, it seemed like no one with any power cared whether we lived or died.

So, a group of New Yorkers – mostly gay men – decided it was time to start raising hell. Calling themselves ACT UP, they disrupted the New York Stock Exchange and, as chapters sprang up nationwide, they staged protests that shut down the FDA and NIH. Eventually, people like Anthony Fauci began to see they had a point. I joined the Los Angeles ACT UP chapter in 1988 and ended up getting arrested half a dozen times in protests at the LA federal building, the County Board of Supervisors and the U.S. Capitol, among others. We won major improvements in HIV/AIDS care in the Los Angeles County health system, which cared for thousands of people with AIDS who had no health insurance. When I landed in San Francisco in 1993, I connected with ACT UP Golden Gate.

Here I am (with my late boyfriend Tim at the left) at one of the protests in that L.A County healthcare campaign. Most of my closest friends from that era have been dead for decades.

I get that COVID has played out very differently than HIV/AIDS. AIDS ramped up slowly and seemed not to affect “normal” people until it killed closeted gay movie and TV star Rock Hudson in 1985, and even then officials largely looked the other way. Only scientific breakthroughs in the 1990s finally stemmed the tide of death. In contrast, the much more highly transmissible SARS-CoV-2 virus came on fast and furious, turning Americans’ lives upside-down almost immediately.

But now, we’ve arrived at what seems in some ways like an eerily similar place. When needed precautions to curb a highly infectious airborne virus spurred frustration and political pushback, officials largely threw up their hands and gave up. Even measures that don’t involve mandates or restrictions on behavior have mostly either been dropped or never happened in the first place.

LONG COVID’S GROWING TOLL

Unfortunately, the virus hasn’t gone away, even if the initial wave of mass death has receded. In August, as a summer surge peaked, US COVID-19 deaths exceeded 1,000 per week, though the latest September data suggests the numbers have begun declining toward pre-surge levels, when deaths were generally in the 300-400 per week range. That’s still equal to a 9/11 every eight to 10 days. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention tracking of SARS-CoV-2 levels in wastewater—probably the best data on US viral prevalence now that cases aren’t being reliably tracked—showed 15 states with “very high” levels and another 19 rated as “high” as of Sept. 19.

But COVID is not just a matter of cases and deaths. The disease’s long-term effects have disabled millions of Americans, and the numbers keep growing with each new wave of infection. An updated review published in Nature Medicine puts the current global number of Long COVID sufferers at 400 million and estimates the worldwide economic impact at a staggering $1 trillion.

We now have plenty of people experiencing repeated SARS-CoV-2 infections. The good news, if you can call it that, is that these reinfections may produce fewer new cases of Long Covid than a person’s first infection – but they absolutely produce some, and the Omicron variants circulating in the last year or two seem to produce more Long Covid than earlier viral varieties. Every time you get COVID, you roll the dice with your health – maybe for the rest of your life.

If I sound alarmed, well, I am. As longtime readers may know, I have some first-hand experience with Long COVID, though in milder form than many experience. My January 2022 infection left me with peripheral neuropathy—painful nerve damage—in my legs and feet. It’s incurable and nearly impossible to treat, as conventional pain drugs don’t help. I will likely never live another day without pain and walking more than six or seven blocks at a stretch is a struggle. I used to enjoy hiking, but will probably never do it again. Still, I don’t have the more debilitating symptoms like crushing fatigue or dysautonomia—disruption of the part of the nervous system that controls automatic functions like heartbeat, blood pressure, digestion and breathing—that afflict some Long COVID sufferers. Lots of people have it way worse than I do.

We know that COVID can have lasting impacts on many parts of the body, including the brain. A recent study of 52 COVID survivors—about half with mild to moderate initial illness and half with more severe disease—found that compared to healthy controls, both groups “had a significantly higher score of cognitive complaints involving cognitive failure and mental fatigue” 27 months after their original illness, with no significant difference based on the severity of that initial illness. On a series of tests, researchers found “changes in brain function” that may explain the reported problems.

Just as scary, a study of people aged 65 and up just published in the Journal of Alzheimer’s Disease reports that “people with COVID were at significantly increased risk for new diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease within 360 days after the initial COVID diagnosis.” This review of the medical records of over six million patients found that the risk escalated with advancing age. As with many of these long-term impacts, the mechanisms involved remain unclear.

Survivors of an initial SARS-CoV-2 infection also have increased rates of high blood pressure, now documented in multiple studies. High blood pressure increases your risk of deadly cardiovascular complications like heart attack and stroke.

I can’t help but wonder whether these issues have affected me, but there’s no way to be sure. My blood pressure, well-controlled for a dozen years with a very low dose of medication, began ratcheting upward about a year and a half ago, necessitating three medication adjustments since then. I’m also definitely more forgetful than I was, mostly little things like walking into a room and forgetting why I went there. But those things can happen to older people with or without COVID, and it’s hard to know cause-and-effect in a given individual.

But I sure as hell know I don’t want to get this virus again and risk these and other issues getting worse. Unfortunately, avoiding it is getting harder by the day, and neither government at any level nor public health authorities seem to care.

PREVENTION? WHAT PREVENTION?

While there’s some evidence that the antiviral drug Paxlovid can reduce the likelihood of Long COVID if administered early enough, the results so far are mixed and not overwhelming. The best way to avoid Long COVID is to not get infected in the first place. As a society, we’ve pretty much stopped trying.

The government is still encouraging vaccination, as it should. But it’s been clear for some time that while the vaccines are very good at reducing the chance of severe illness and death if you get infected, they offer only limited protection against getting infected in the first place. “Vax and relax” can prevent mass death, but it can’t prevent mass infection and an ever-growing number of cases of Long COVID, even if most people get vaccinated. And vaccination rates have been declining for a while, with a new Ohio State University survey reporting that only 43% of U.S. adults have gotten or plan to get the new COVID-19 shot.

And in a bit of absolute madness, Florida’s Ron DeSantis-appointed Surgeon General Joseph Ladapo has actually advised against use of the newly updated mRNA vaccines. In a post on Mastodon, Yale epidemiologist Gregg Gonsalves called this “beyond irresponsible. It is malpractice.”

Ladapo is an outlier, but even his saner colleagues around the country downplay the fact that we don’t have to limit ourselves to vaccination. It’s an airborne virus, so there are two main ways to stop it from spreading: 1) Get the virus out of the air, or at least reduce its concentration to a very low level, and 2) Protect yourself from breathing in any virus that’s in the air around you. We know how to do both.

Masking works, but the type of mask matters. As the Mayo Clinic notes, “Respirators such as nonsurgical N95s give the most protection. KN95s and medical masks provide the next highest level of protection. Cloth masks provide less protection.” Two and a half years ago, a CDC study found that those who reported regularly wearing an N95 or KN95 respirator in indoor public settings had an 86% lower risk of catching COVID-19.

Recently, during my first return visit to San Francisco after moving in early 2022, I met my nieces for lunch at the Ferry Plaza. It was a Saturday, Farmers Market day, and the place was jammed. In three-plus hours I saw no more than half a dozen people wearing any sort of mask, and only a couple were N95s. In my new hometown of Hilo, masking is only slightly more common. At the supermarket, I see barely 10% of customers and staff in some sort of mask. In some venues, it’s less.

A recent Ipsos survey found that half of Americans believe they’ll never get COVID again. Only 20% described themselves as “trying to stay as safe as possible.”

None of this is a surprise—people are simply responding to the messages they get from the people supposedly leading on health issues. The CDC promotes vaccination but barely talks about masking anymore; it acknowledges the value of indoor air quality but doesn’t seem to be doing much about it. In interviews, CDC Director Mandy Cohen regularly urges vaccination but almost never brings up masking or air quality and says little about Long Covid. Political leaders mostly talk about COVID in the past tense and pat themselves on the back for a job well done in prior years. The result is what you’d expect: Most Americans now treat COVID like a common cold, disregarding most precautions and not bothering to test when they get sick.

Back in 2022, when public policy on COVID was still relatively sane, the Biden administration published indoor air quality guidance and made congressionally-approved funds available that “that can be used in schools, public buildings, and other settings to improve indoor air quality.” It’s unclear exactly how much of that money has been used and for what, although some school systems have definitely made HVAC upgrades. But we’ve never had either enforceable indoor air standards or a coordinated plan to implement them. As Science noted in July, “The COVID-19 pandemic has clearly shown the vulnerability of society to the spread of infectious diseases. At the same time, with frequent outbreaks in elder care facilities and school classrooms, it became clear that it was a fatal mistake to largely neglect the recommendations of scientists and engineers regarding minimum standards for ventilation and indoor air quality.”

In any case, those federal dollars were aimed at schools and public buildings. It’s been left entirely to the private sector to do, or not do, anything to reduce airborne pathogens in supermarkets, theaters, clubs, malls and other privately owned spaces. Local groups like Chicago’s Clean Air Club and Austin’s Clear the Air ATX have tried to fill the gap by lending HEPA filters and other clean air equipment to arts and performance venues and other gathering places.

A RADICAL IDEA: DO WHAT WORKS

We know what to do. As Clean Air Club founder Emily Dupree and co-author Shelby Speier wrote in Sick Times in May, “We possess the technology to make public spaces safer. Studies show HEPA air purification and far-UVC lamps drastically reduce the number of airborne pathogens in a room and therefore lessen the likelihood of COVID-19 transmission. When combined with other layers of protection, these tools have the potential to finally make our shared spaces more accessible during an airborne pandemic.”

A key word here is accessible. Failure to address indoor air quality and other prevention measures makes public spaces seriously dangerous for those at highest risk, including the elderly, the immunocompromised and those with long-term health issues, including Long Covid.

Such simple, factual messages are rarely heard in official statements about COVID. “What I find the most frustrating about official handling of COVID and prevention is the lack of care, education, and honoring the science around COVID,” comments Clear the Air ATX founder and Long Covid activist Katie Drackert. “Telling people to ‘stay home when they feel sick’ for a virus that spreads asymptomatically? Well, they are just straight up ignoring science.”

Admirable as they are, the small, volunteer-driven efforts of groups like Drackert’s and Dupree’s are not remotely comparable to the scale of the problem. For now, people must take matters into their own hands. “In the year 2024, people still need to be wearing a well fitted KN95 or above for optimal communal and individual protection,” Drackert says. In the absence of reliable information about air quality in indoor spaces, she suggests getting a portable air quality monitor, which can be reasonably affordable. “High CO₂ levels indicate poor ventilation, which may lead to higher concentrations of aerosols that could contain the virus,” she explains. “Some air quality monitors track particulate matter (PM2.5 and PM10), which are small airborne particles. While COVID is smaller than these particles, high PM levels may indicate poor indoor air quality.”

Most of us can’t entirely avoid being in spaces with poor air quality, and that leaves us with masking, which the country has largely abandoned. Worse, we’re starting to see bans on face coverings in public spaces being enacted—for example, in Nassau County, New York, and North Carolina.

These laws typically contain exceptions for people masking for health reasons, but, as New Jersey’s Star-Ledger noted in a recent editorial opposing a proposed mask ban, “t leaves it up to the cops to decide whether someone has a legitimate medical reason for wearing a mask at a public gathering. “How will they know that? It’s subjective. And based on past experience, we know what that means: Police will disproportionately stop and question Black and brown people, who have also been the most likely to continue wearing masks to protect against COVID-19.” It’s hard to imagine a more demented public policy than making disease prevention illegal. And it’s not hard at all to imagine a COVID-19 prevention framework that would make a meaningful difference without causing a nationwide freakout: Encourage masking. Even if mask mandates are a political non-starter, there’s still plenty we can do. First, officials can talk about it and actively encourage people to wear high-quality protection like N-95s when in busy, indoor spaces. They can remind people of its importance—that COVID is not over, not just a cold, and that even a “mild” case can change your life forever. Federal, state and local governments could distribute N-95s or KN-95s free or at minimal cost. Get serious about indoor air purification. Build on what the Biden administration started a few years ago: Develop medically informed, enforceable indoor air quality standards and create a verification system so that people know when a building they enter meets them. Start with public buildings and the largest, busiest private venues, like sports arenas, concert halls and theaters, and move on from there. Give business owners generous technical and financial support in meeting those standards, and a reasonable amount of time in which to do it. While this program is ramping up, fund the local organizations now struggling with limited resources to fill the gap. None of this is that difficult. It’s not even that expensive when you consider that the federal government is in the process of spending $634 billion to upgrade nuclear weapons that with any luck will never be used. What’s missing is political will, and that won’t be there until people scream bloody murder. That’s why I think it may be time for a new version of ACT UP focused on COVID-19. The issues are somewhat different, but less so than you might think. While the original ACT UP focused a lot on research, treatment and care, it also addressed prevention. ACT UP chapters around the country started syringe exchange programs, handed out condoms at high schools, and sometimes succeeded in shaming the system into doing the right thing. And of course, there are issues to tackle around Long Covid research that I haven’t addressed here, but which I will try to cover in a future piece. The fundamental problem is much the same as people with AIDS faced in 1986: a system stuck in neutral, politicians stuck in denial, and a public closing their eyes, covering their ears and shouting, “I don’t hear you!” The first task must be to break the system–and the broader population, as much as possible–out of its present inertia, complacency and denial. I honestly don’t know whether ACT UP tactics like occupying the CDC and disrupting state and local health commission meetings will have the same effect they did decades ago, but at this point I don’t know what else to try. Nothing good lies at the end of our current path.

[brotpqueen]

Good Omens hot take!

So we all love drawing parallels between the ineffable husbands and the other big ships, right?

Ineffable Husbands

Ineffable Bureaucracy

Vinylatte

Most of us imagine the mirror characters to be this, right?

Well that’s where I think we’re getting this wrong! I do agree with the vinylatte parallels, but as for ineffable bureaucracy? I have a different view. To me the parallels go more like this.

Okay so hear me out! I know it’s easy to draw comparisons because obviously the angel character will have more in common with another angel and vice versa for the demons. And that may be true on the surface. However! The more I think about these characters the more it makes sense to me.

Well start with the Crowley-Gabriel comparison, because I’ve seen this floating around a little more.

They have a good amount of traits in common.

Cold exterior, sharp language and mannerisms, secret soft side, all that good stuff. But what makes them so comparable to me is their impulsiveness. They (and Nina) tend to deal with their problems through schemes that aren’t entirely thought through and, most obviously, avoidance/escape. Crowley suggests multiple times that he and aziraphale run away together, and Gabriel’s grand plan for being with Beelzebub is to simply - literally - go to hell. (Nina’s example of avoidance is avoiding her feelings about Lindsay leaving her and her avoiding maggie so she doesn’t have to deal with any potential new feelings on top of those. This is a much less extreme version of how the dudes™️ handle things but then again vinylatte are really just the realistic balanced version of all the other idiots.) They’re not STUPID by any means, but they’re a lot more prone to an ‘act first, think later’ tactic. They also tend to show a lack of consideration about how anything they do to be with their chosen partner will affect the rest of the world. Crowley wants to go off with aziraphale and let the earth get blown to bits so long as they can be together and Gabriel leaves for hell not seeming to give much thought as to what will happen without him as supreme archangel. Gabriel’s plan also gives Crowley himself another chance to show his avoidance as his plan is to simply dump Gabriel somewhere. I love these dudes but they are, and I say this with love, a little silly.

Now to my favourite comparison! And no it’s not just because I’m delusional and think they’d be besties (though if you do wanna see that my fic Camp Armagetalong is full of my propaganda for that cause). It’s just genuinely such an interesting thought to me. In contrast to their respective partners, Aziraphale and Beelzebub are both a lot more strategic. More logical. To be quite blunt - they’re smarter about it. Aziraphale, while his hesitation may be frustrating, is correct in his judgements most of the time. He’s right that heaven and hell knowing about he and Crowley’s relationship would be dangerous and he’s right to try to cover it up for their safety despite how painful it may be. His plan when Gabriel shows up with his memory wiped is to figure out what happened and go from there.

In a similar vein, Beelzebub, while it may be less intentional, goes about trying to find Gabriel in a similar way. They ask the person they think is most likely to know where he is and when they get a lead they don’t simply go knocking down the door themself, they have an organised fleet breach the bookshop. Their gift to Gabriel also acts as a sort of backup plan to save him should his brashness get him in hot water - exactly what it does.

But above all the biggest similarity I see is that while Crowley and Gabriel deal with their problems by avoiding or simply destroying the issue, these two are fighters. These are people (beings?) who know what they want, face their issues head on and try to find ways to work through problems instead of jumping ship.

What happened to Gabriel? Time to investigate.

The system won’t let you be with your husband? Keep it a secret until you figure out a proper plan.

Someone’s being annoying? Either insult them right to their face or use the power of sarcasm! (Gabriel watch and learn. ‘Shut your stupid mouth and die’ is not as effective as an extremely bitchy glare.)

Okay I know this isn’t a very good analysis or argument I just wanted to ramble about my thoughts

[inevitably-johnlocked]

A Breakdown of My Thoughts On Good Omens S2

(That may or may not also be a meta about my predictions for the future interwoven in)

Hey All!

All right, I’ve officially watched Good Omens Season 2 twice, and am almost done my third time through, and I want to put out some thoughts before I start reading other people’s meta about S2 so that my initial thoughts aren’t influenced by those. I was GOING to post it to my GO blog @inevitably-ineffable-husbands first, but decided instead to make the initial post here since this is my largest audience (my GO blog is mostly a reblog blog, but it’s been pretty active the past week with people sending me asks there!).

During my second watch-through, I took some notes about stuff I wanted to expand upon. This got a bit messy, long, and disorganized so I tried to just clean up those notes so they’re more legible. I think I inevitably want to write separate meta about each section, especially after my next few rewatches (AND especially since I want to talk more about 3 or four Big Thoughts that I have about S3). 

This meta turned out to be a lengthy essay-style meta with a few bits of point form and free thoughts, broken into sections for easier consumption, so I hope you will give it a read through. It’s longer than I intended (it’s about 5,000 words), so if you need to pause anywhere, I’ve conveniently broken it up into sections below the cut, which you can see the breakdown of here:

Before The Beginning

Crowley is A-Major-Angel Theory (or The Angel That Crowley Might Actually Have Been)

Maggie and Nina (Mirrors. It’s about mirrors)

The Ineffable Bureaucracy (MORE MIRRORS YAY I LOVE DYING!)

Crowley and Aziraphale (& Their Relationship Arc) (which includes my thoughts on THAT moment and why it was wrong)

The Metatron and Aziraphale’s Decision (I actually covered a large chunk of this on THIS POST so you can read just that if you want instead)

Other Things (That I Didn’t Know Where Else to Put) 

Final Thoughts

Also, so it’s not hidden under the cut, here are the things I’m interested in expanding upon in the future, if you guys would like to read more. The first one is the only “for sure” one on my plate right now:

A Thought on AziraCrow from an A-Spec Perspective [REDUX]: An expansion on the above-linked meta I put out a week ago about their relationship arc and how I feel it’s being portrayed and what it means foor the future.

THAT Scene Small Thoughts: And its importance RIGHT NOW and why the confession will be so much more powerful in S3. Actually I think I MIGHT cover this in the AziraCrow meta, but I DO want to expand upon the scene anyway regardless.

And I don’t have many things to say as of finishing this meta, but I would like to put out my thoughts on why Aziraphale made That Choice. (EDIT: It would be an expansion on THIS POST which would include some points I made under the cut in the various sections, compiled together. I know I’ll have more thoughts as the weeks move on and as I understand the scene more and more).

Anyway, I hope you enjoy what I’ve written! The next meta I’d like to tackle is the Relationship Redux meta, provided that the asks I got in my inbox aren’t going to take up too much of my time.

Feel free to add your thoughts in the reblogs and replies as usual! I welcome other opinions and thoughts, and I will try my best to keep all the threads together. This blog is and will always remain a community project! :) 

PLEASE be advised, in that case, that Spoilers WILL BE in the notes, and OBVIOUSLY there are spoilers below the cut for the entire season! Cheers, and thank you! Enjoy!

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BEFORE THE BEGINNING

I have running theory that’s kind of on strings right now, but I feel like Aziraphale feels responsible for Crowley’s Fall, that he feels he didn’t do enough to help prevent it, which may explain his actions in Episode 6. 

Now, I’m not saying that the entire reason he spends so much time with Crowley is because of some underlying guilt, NOT AT ALL (just a small part of it), but more that he feels like he could have done more to dissuade Crowley from asking questions – It’s why he spends their entire lives trying to convince Crowley he is good! Aziraphale loved seeing an angel so happy with what they were doing, and his warnings were making Crowley unhappy. Instead, Aziraphale decided to compliment Crowley on his work to make him smile again. I think it’s absolutely something to note since this scene and the finale of E6 suspiciously bookend each other, meant to be compared and contrasted with each other. 

When Azzie is presented with the opportunity to give Crowley back something he loved doing – being happy making galaxies – Aziraphale took it, because he knows how much Crowley struggles with his own sense of self.

Unfortunately, Azzie thinks Crowley’s inner turmoil is because of who he is and his status as a demon, not because Aziraphale is literally his whole raison d’être and why Crowley keeps coming back to him – he’s only ever truly happy being around Aziraphale.

Crowley, in turn, has become Azzie’s own reason for being, he just sadly hasn’t come to that conclusion yet at this point in the story. Aziraphale thinks that by being the Supreme Archangel, he will have the authority to make things RIGHT, not knowing the info that we as an audience have through Crowley that that is FAR from the truth. I’ll go more into it in my Metatron section below.

Basically I’m saying that this sequence at the beginning exists to show who Aziraphale is as a person, an angel who struggles with his OWN sense of self and his desire to do good and make people happy. Aziraphale is so consumed with believing that he can change things if only he has some control over a situation, then it can all be better; he fails to see that he already has everything he wants right in front of him. He doesn’t think he can TRULY be with Crowley safely unless something changes the status quo, and he naïvely thinks that taking the job is the best way to do so. I think next season we will see Aziraphale finally understand that he CAN’T be “free” until he accepts that he and Crowley ARE better as one. 

Another note I wanted to make about this is just an aside commentary: Aziraphale ABSOLUTELY was smitten by Crowley. I suspect until he met Crowley, Aziraphale had never seen another angel be so joyous in his work. It intrigued Azzie and blossomed into something-unknown in him.

Azzie was smitten since before the beginning, and that he indeed pines for Crowley. He’s just terrified about what happens After if he were to do anything about it.

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CROWLEY-IS-RAPHAEL THEORY (or another Top-Ranking Angel)

This is one of my favourite theories that circulates in the fandom, and I went into a bit of detail about this on this post here, but I want to expand more upon it briefly (hah).

I think this season further proved Crowley was A Big Angel™ before he Fell (not necessarily Raphael, but it IS the prominent theory about his identity). It’s a Big Point that I think they’ve been planting the seeds for in both seasons so that we as the audience can figure it out; maybe not exactly WHO Crowley was (the general audience wouldn’t know about the theory), more that Crowley was indeed a higher ranking angel than all of them. This could be a big reveal in S3 for the general audience, and will be the reward for the “easter eggs” that the fans picked up on. 

Here are the clues that I have so far, both from the fandom theories for S1, and my own observations of S2... I have not read any meta yet as of writing this, so I probably missed some if people are talking about it:

Raphael is notably missing from the main Archangels. It’s very odd, because he was a prominent figure in a story about Abraham

When we first see Crowley in S2, we see him as the primary creator of the universe. That kind of task isn’t given to just any angel. We knew in S1 that Crowley created stars, just not the full story of it.

The only Top Angel who recognizes Crowley is Saraqael and we don’t find that out until Episode 6. They mention that the two worked together during the creation of a nebula. Saraqael is just as old as Crowley and was there Before the Beginning as well. Michael, Uriel, and Gabriel don’t recognize Crowley when they come down during Job’s trials, meaning that Crowley probably Fell before they came to be Top Level Angels. 

“A throne, a dominion or ABOVE” is who Muriel said were the only angel classes that could open the file on Gabriel, and Crowley literally just opens it without issue. Crowley faffs it off as an old password (but even then, why would he HAVE an old password for a confidential file?) but I think it’s more true that he actually had and hasn’t lost the clearance he had as a higher order of angel. Muriel NEVER stated that an Archangel can open the file at ALL. BUT I think Gaiman’s Archangels are technically top of the chain so they possibly are able to open the files as well.   For shits and giggles, I actually looked into the orders of angels: Muriel’s listed angels are part of the top 4 levels of Angel rankings. Now, I know that the authors took creative liberty with Capital A-Archangels for story purposes, but it’s a very interesting thought, isn’t it? I wonder if Crowley was actually one of the first Supreme Archangels? Just something to nibble on until S3.

The INSANE power level of HALF of a bit of a small miracle from TWO people that can raise 25 dead people is very interesting thing to literally flash red in your face as if to say “THIS IS A REALLY IMPORTANT THING TO REMEMBER, DON’T FORGET IT”. Why? Why make this the catalyst of events in the series if it’s not important and won’t be brought up again? Was Crowley’s power the one that set off alarms in Heaven since his part was to hide Gabe from Heaven?

The writers have deliberately avoided giving us Crowley’s name in Before the Beginning. Crowley has a penchant for changing his name when he wants to distance himself from the past, and there’s a good chance he purposely threw away his Heavenly (dead) name to cast aside any memories of that former life. It’s not who he is anymore, nor who he wants to be ever again.

Crowley constantly references the problems with Heaven, stuff that Aziraphale seems to have no knowledge of. 

Crowley has an uncanny sense of where Aziraphale is and what he’s up to at all times. Actually, he’s able to sense trouble from everyone regardless. NOW, this might be down to him just... being so smitten with Aziraphale that perhaps he’s purposely attuned his senses to him, but none of the other angels nor demons seem to be able to do this unless it’s with their own kind. Crowley seems to have it for everyone. This is an odd power for one “measly demon” to have.

I’m certain I’m missing a few other easter eggs here that were mentioned, but in the interim, I think these definitely the ones that are worth noting.

“One Character Split Into Two”

I’ve seen a theory that ties into the Angel Theory where Crowley and Aziraphale are actually two parts of the SAME angel, Raphael, and I only remembered it after I saw this quote from David and Michael’s interview:

“Well, now we’re playing one character that’s sort of split into two”

Interesting choice of words... Did one of them slip up here? I don’t think that this is the case, that it’s just me over-reading into an interview quote, but it is something I did came across in my readings of the Raphael Theory that I thought I should mention.

While trying to find a couple posts to link to for this theory, I came across this super interesting post regarding Aziraphale’s name meaning in Hebrew, and it does list ONE of the “unlikely” possibilities being that it means “Raphael is my strength”. While the author links this to be part of Crowley!Raphael theory, I kind of like it for the Duality Theory, where Crowley IS Azzie’s strength in the sense that he’s the Emotional Support Demon. Crowley IS kind and gentle and protective of Aziraphale. And Azzie, who gets his strength from Raphael Crowley, is the brains (or main single braincell carrier) of the operation.

Kind of like an overly-romantic version of soulmates, literally One Soul split into two people who are meant to find each other again and become whole.

Also, I go back to my point about their power being ASININE at less than half each. WHY IS THIS POSSIBLE? A theory: They are stronger than an Archangel’s miracle together, so it’s not absurd to speculate that it was stronger because it was finally at its full power with the SINGLE soul concocting the miracle.

Anyway, this Duality Theory is probably definitely not the case since we see them both Before the Beginning, BUT we can argue that the scene we saw was their first introduction after being split... Aziraphale just HAPPENS to zoom by, the only single angel in the area? Hmm.

I ALSO just want to say that perhaps when they body-swapped, that may have also activated dormant “together” powers within themselves? Just a little thought I had while writing this section.

Aziraphale is Raphael and Doesn’t Remember

And finally, there’s the theory that they will pull a Shyamalan and reveal that it’s Azzie that’s actually Raphael. I honestly think this is the least likely scenario, given that all the clues they’re putting in the show don’t at all point to this, other than the possible entomology of his name (I read somewhere that Gaiman initially was going to spell it Aziraphael to coincide with the naming conventions of the other Angels) could be a play on the Raphael name and it’s Aziraphale who’s actually the missing Raphael.

I don’t think it’s this at all, for the record. I just wanted to point it out since it is a theory that I’ve seen thrown around linked to the Raphael Theory.

Regardless of which theory it is, I just CANNOT get it out of my head at how often they kept bringing up elements of Crowley’s past, and I just.... mmmm. I know he’s more Important than he lets on. There’s just too many eggs dropped in this season for me to let it go without a bit of grumbling.

Or maybe I’m just looking too much into it. *shrugs* I can’t help it, reading between the lines is a hobby of mine I do so enjoy.

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MAGGIE AND NINA

UGH, I absolutely love character mirrors... I love seeing the parallels of characters and how they’re supposed to represent the protagonists in situations. 

Regarding Maggie and Nina, upon rewatching the series, I see now that Nina is primarily Aziraphale’s mirror and Maggie is Crowley’s. 

For Maggie, as an expansion on a drunken post during my liveblogging:

She’s smitten (”pathetically in love”) with someone just out of reach, hopelessly pining and watching from afar.

She’s STUPIDLY protective of and adores Mr. Fell and Nina.

She, like Crowley with Aziraphale, attempts to make Nina happy: She gives a record as a gift without thinking about the “after” (Crowley tends to do the same)

She’s stands up to the demons and for herself.

She’s “unloved and unloveable”, which Crowley believes himself to be

She’s the one who thought up the plans to get them out of trouble

For Nina:

Fussy and stuck in her ways

Doesn’t want to disappoint but can’t seem to do right by anyone

“we’re just friends, well, we hardly know each other” (which I believe is a line similar to one Aziraphale said in S1)

Afraid to start a new relationship for fear of not being good enough

Makes their love interest wait and hopes they’ll be there when the time is right (She will be)

Her relationship with Lindsay appears to me to be a parallel for Azzie’s relationship with Heaven, with them being "done” with Aziraphale for one too many indiscretions. Lindsay also accuses Nina of “cheating” which Aziraphale technically does with choosing Crowley over Heaven 

Their inevitable NOT match-made is a gentle parallel to the painful NOT match-made by our heroes. There’s a bump in the road, and when they’re both ready, they’ll eventually get together. 

Also, another thing I wanted to note here, is that Nina’s VERY heartfelt conversation with Crowley is super, SUPER important to AziraCrow’s arc, and I believe it is the catalyst to why Crowley made the decision to try to confess in Episode 6. Like, he genuinely looks like he’s re-evaluated a few things after Nina walks away. And because it was the Aziraphale mirror stating this, Crowley perhaps starts to get ideas in his head that maybe Azzie is ready to move forward, since “it certainly looks like [you’re a couple from the outside]”. Why not make it official then? Maybe Aziraphale IS just waiting for Crowley to make the move.

Food for thought.

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THE INEFFABLE BUREAUCRACY

I don’t have much to honestly say about this one, other than I am SHOCKED that it only took them 4 years to figure their shit out but our idiots still are at first base after 6000 years. Get your asses moving, idiots!

Seriously though, they’re the biggest pair of mirrors in the season, but funnily enough, I think Gabriel is Crowley’s, and Beez is Azzie’s.  

Gabriel, like Crowley to Azzie, introduces human things to Beez. 

Gabe questions Heaven and convinces Beez to question their side... essentially he “Falls” when the trial happens, abandoning Heaven. 

Gabe throws everything away to be with Beez. 

Beez is the one who learns from Gabe, just like Azzie learns from Crowley.

Beez compares themself to Aziraphale: “I imagine he took better care of you than I would have”.

Beez calling Gabe “you silly, silly angel”... Aziraphale called Crowley silly in the first half of the season.

And as an aside, just... the casual “I love you” from Gabe is like an unfiltered Crowley. Because I am certain Crowley will be the first to say it.

That’s just a super simplified version of it all, but just wanted to point it out so y’all can see where I’m coming from on why I think that.

And I REALLY BELIEVE that Aziraphale will repeat this or a similar line to Beez’s in S3: 

“I just found something that mattered more to me than choosing sides.”

I think it will be the line before the climax of S3 that Aziraphale says when he finally rejects Heaven. Because that was a POWERFUL line, and it will solidify the mirrors and parallels that are all over this season. I feel like Heaven won’t suffer the same incident happening twice, so we might even finally get to see a ridiculously protective, vengeful angel Aziraphale, to rival all of Protective Crowley moments! WHAT a payoff that would be after two seasons of him just kind of sitting idly by not standing up for himself, eh?? GOD I want it.

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CROWLEY AND AZIRAPHALE (& THEIR RELATIONSHIP ARC)

I have just a few notes to immediately take away from S2, but I do plan on expanding more upon these thoughts in my Revision of my A Thought on AziraCrow from an A-Spec Perspective meta I wrote prior to S2. 

In that meta I state very clearly how important their relationship and its portrayal is to me. I do concede that, because of this fact, I may be biased in my opinions about literally the entirety of S2′s relationship arc. I ADORE Aziraphale and I really see a lot of myself in him, and I can understand why he did what he did at the end, and why the “rejection” happened. But again, I will touch upon that with the revision meta.

Instead, I took some additional notes while I watched and rewatched S2 that I don’t think I can fit well into that meta without ham-fisting it in. I’ll try my best to break it into yummier sections so it’s not so messy.

Protective / Jealous Crowley (and his possible PTSD)

This point deserved its own little section, because it’s one of my favourite things this season. I love just how BLATANTLY PROTECTIVE and JEALOUS Crowley was, to the point of being near-murderous. I LOVE the confrontation scene with Gabriel so much, because it’s SO revealing to just how terrified Crowley is of Aziraphale being hurt and not being in Crowley’s life again. 

I imagine he constantly replays the fire in his head: what if Crowley WASN’T there to save Aziraphale that time??? To step into fire for him??? He’s seen how bad No-Azzie would be with the Bookshop Fire, and I think he STILL believes that it was Hellfire that discorporated Azzie (not the accidental summoning circle). So imagine the psyche of a demon who is hopelessly in love with an angel, having to be face to face with the fire that he believes killed Azzie the first time and THEN have Azzie’s boss basically tell Crowley how little he thinks of Aziraphale? Ooof.

And I also will standby the fanon theory that it was Crowley who left all the fire extinguishers in the bookshop, and not Aziraphale. Bless Azzie, he knows that this is a “New Fear Unlocked” in Crowley and lets him do it to ease the anxiety.

And isn’t it funny that Crowley (aside from the 2 year lockdown) seems to have spent every waking moment keeping a steady eye on Aziraphale? He’s scared, which is why I think he might have some PTSD related to everything he’s seen that Aziraphale is blissfully unaware of.

Their Arc and The Kiss

It’s so clear to me now more than before that Aziraphale IS Crowley’s whole life, to the point of obsession. I think the final arc that Crowley has to go through before he can truly be with Aziraphale proper is learning to let Aziraphale also protect him, to loosen the stranglehold that his fear of loss has on him. That Crowley doesn’t have to shoulder everything by himself and be Aziraphale’s shadow. Because that’s what he is in S2 – a lot of scenes of them together in the modern day is Crowley trailing just slightly behind Azzie, always watching and waiting for trouble and being there for him.

I think Crowley has a genuine fear of loss of control similar to Aziraphale’s. Where Azzie’s is related to “well if I can do this thing then everything will be alright”, Crowley’s is “well if I can just keep Aziraphale safe, then everything will be alright” and that’s... not a good foundation for a relationship. Their Big Breakup had to happen for them to both realize this. 

Aziraphale has NOT gone through his “lost my partner” arc like Crowley has with the bookshop fire. I go more into it in the Metatron section, but I think that Azzie’s arc will look more like Crowley being used as a leverage tool against Azzie by Heaven, and those seeds were planted in the final moments of E6. Perhaps something DOES happen when Crowley inevitably comes to his rescue, and he also “loses Crowley for good” (but we know that the totally-made-up-just-now law of parallels will bring him back, we hope).

They’re currently at the Miscommunication and Separation stage of their relationship. They’re both so scared of hurting each other that they DON’T communicate... they DON’T expose each other to “bad things” that they know and instead just focus on the good. The breakup had to happen the way it did for Aziraphale to finally Get A Clue – because I honestly don’t think he realized Crowley loved him until the kiss – and that Azzie himself wasn’t the only one with a crush on his best friend. It had to happen that way for Crowley to understand that his overprotectiveness and lying by omission only harms Aziraphale in the long run.

Listen, I think it’s possible that Azzie thinks that Crowley only did the kiss because he didn’t want Aziraphale to leave at that moment, just another “Crowley thing” that he would do. It was piss-poor timing that was at the tail end of too many emotions and anger, and it’s easy to see how Azzie could have interpreted the kiss wrong. 

They both expressed wanting to be together, but misunderstandings will ensue because neither of them are good at communicating WHAT exactly "being together” entails. Crowley thinks Azzie means “working together side by side for a shitty company”. Aziraphale thinks Crowley means “just doing what we always do and having fun doing it”, both without shifting the status quo, when in fact they both mean “I can’t see myself with anyone but you and I want you forever in any way we can be, let’s please shift the status quo”. 

Then Crowley made the situation worse (though I do think he was VERY brave in doing it because WE the audience know his intentions are true and honest) by adding a kiss into the mix when they’re both upset and angry at each other. Both are left crying (Aziraphale turns around when the Metatron arrives, and there’s NO reason he should unless it’s to wipe his eyes. And Crowley deliberately put his glasses back on, so I think it was to cover up the tears) and no one gets what they truly want.

I think we’ll get a payoff for this next season, when they’re finally BOTH on the same page and NOT misunderstanding each other. I think there will be a “did you mean it?” from Aziraphale, and then a verbalized “I love you (or a variation of those words)” from Crowley, and then the paralleled line of “our side” I mentioned in the Gabe & Beez section. I think there will be a better, more satisfying kiss next season. I really do have faith about that.

Other AziraCrow Things

I saw a meme that put it best: “Aziraphale fell first, but Crowley fell HARDER”. I think Crowley is more comfortable in his pining because he’s not constrained by the same hangups and “obligations” that Aziraphale has. Aziraphale is worried that it’s “sinful” to love a demon.

I mentioned this before in the Raphael section, but I want to reiterate the point about The Miracle, because it’s SUPER important that this was a big plot point. The fact that it was so strong for something apparently so minuscule according to them proves that they are better together, and now that Heaven is aware that their powers combined to create that miracle, they absolutely want to keep the two of them apart. They suddenly became very aware that Aziraphale and Crowley are RIDICULOUSLY stronger together, because if a tiny miracle can set off alarms in Heaven, what can two full miracles combined create? I feel like this is a BIG Chekov’s gun for S3. 

I think a large part about why Crowley is offended by Aziraphale’s acceptance of the job offer is because Crowley is upset that he’s not enough for Aziraphale, especially when he rejected Beez’s offer for Aziraphale. His voice shakes when he asked what Aziraphale did. He’s hurt.

THE TOUCHING in this season is insane. It’s so casual and it’s EVERYWHERE. Their relationship, when it’s finally actualized, is going to be heart wrenching in a good way, the “good sort of hurt”. I truly do believe AziraCrow is endgame.

It amuses me to no end that the fact that these two idiots and their one braincell think that they can make a human relationship work when they’ve been mutually pining over each other for 6,000+ years with very little progress. And good lord, they both take their advice from fiction. It’s hilarious.

Aziraphale’s unending faith in Crowley’s “goodness” also kills me. I love that Crowley actually never wants to kill anything, he’s literally just trying to get by without getting caught, and he always gently encourages Aziraphale to do the same. He cares so much about being gentle with Aziraphale. The scene on the rock where Crowley is SO SOFT with Aziraphale melted my heart. It’s so sweet.

I LOVE that it was CROWLEY who got Aziraphale into food and drinks. It explains a LOT about why Crowley likes watching Aziraphale eat. HE did that. It was his first “gift” to Aziraphale (to his knowledge at this stage, when really it was Crowley’s smile at making the universe that really did it).

Crowley’s devotion to making Aziraphale happy while Azzie is just oblivious to how Crowley feels hurts a LOT, but I want to expand more upon this in my followup reblog to my relationship meta. I see myself SO MUCH in Azzie it’s goddamned scary.

Actually, I don’t think Aziraphale is oblivious to be mean, since he makes a point that “rescuing me makes him so happy”, BUT I think Aziraphale might misinterpret Crowley’s devotion as “Crowley wanting to do good” and not “omg he’s in love with me and wants me safe always”. Which I think is why Azzie is naïve enough to believe that Crowley actually WANTS to do good and not get in trouble for it, so thinks that Crowley will jump at the chance to go back to Heaven with him. Aziraphale always saw the rescues and the saving of children and animals on the same level –  as a demon fighting against his nature – when in reality it’s a demon who just does what he wants because he cares about everything and Aziraphale happens to be at the top of that list.

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THE METATRON and AZIRAPHALE’S DECISION

This section will be short since I actually covered a large chunk of it in my Manipulation of the Metatron Meta Reply a couple days ago, so please go read that if you’re interested. The shortened, summarized version of that is this:

The Metatron is playing Aziraphale, and he’s only using Aziraphale to bring about Armageddon 2.0, using Aziraphale’s desire to be needed and useful against him. Azzie DIDN’T see what Crowley saw in Heaven when he accessed the files and I don’t think he knows about the Book of Life Threat that was the punishment for harbouring Gabriel, either. Only Crowley knew about that, but didn’t tell Azzie (again, a huge problem in their communication that needs to be worked out).

Heaven and the Metatron KNOW that Crowley is a liability and I suspect they also know how powerful they are together. They needed to drive a wedge between them, and knew Aziraphale was pure-hearted enough to believe that he could make a difference, AND that Crowley would never take up the offer that was presented given his vocal disdain for both Heaven and Hell. 

And they chose Aziraphale as opposed to the other angels because the angels actually lust for the power, and that can be unpredictable. But because Azzie has ALWAYS only wanted to do Good with no ulterior motives other than to Make Everything Better, he is easier to manipulate. Crowley is the bargaining chip that will be used against Azzie if he attempts to go rogue like Gabe, that I am pretty certain about. I think that Azzie will find out about the Book of Life because they’ll place blame on Crowley for harbouring Gabriel. Aziraphale has no idea that Gabriel really didn’t have any power. The minute Gabe turned against them, a trial and ousting happened. Aziraphale got himself into a no-win situation, and upon discovering this, he’ll believe that, because he rejected Crowley, Crowley won’t come to save him this time, so to save Crowley, Azzie will go along with the plan. Crowley’s life will literally be in Aziraphale’s hands.

I’ve no idea how Crowley will find out about it (from Muriel maybe?), but Crowley’s POV will be the primary focus next season (since this season was Azzie’s) and we’re gonna see a vengeful demon and I’m here for it. Will there be a dramatic rescue or sacrifice? I think so. Not sure who the whump candle will go to, but my bet is on Crowley this time since we got Aziraphale in S1. Who knows. I’m all for “Aziraphale is hurt, so now Crowley goes feral”, but that’s a personal preference that I can get from fanfics, LOL.

Anyway, the long-short is that this job will be the wake-up call Azzie needs to finally see what Crowley saw, without the manipulation of words to confuse him. That Azzie can’t just “make things better” because he will never be allowed to make things better. As a Supreme Archangel, he will have the clearance and ability to find out everything Crowley did. Unfortunately, it will be too late... or will it? ...

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OTHER THINGS ON MY MIND (that I didn’t know where else to put)

Aziraphale NEVER FELL because they didn’t want it to look like an Institutional Problem. I even hazard a guess that NO angel has ever Fell since the Initial and Only Fall that sent Satan, Crowley and the other demons down. But Aziraphale doesn’t know that and I suspect that it’s this constant fear of Falling that keeps him complacent to Heaven. He’ll find out how they’ve really been dealing with problems when he’s in his new position.

And I think Azzie also never fell because Crowley made a point to never ever snitch. He knows they would eat him alive in Hell, so he protects Azzie from that as well.

I love that the Bentley clearly has a favourite and it isn’t Crowley!!! The car literally tries to follow Aziraphale. It’s so cute.

And on the subject of the Bentley... Crowley can feel everything going on with his car?? So like... is that a metaphor for Aziraphale being inside Crowley or.....? hee hee heeeeeee.

I loved that David got to use his natural accent in the Edinburgh scenes. IT’S SO PRECIOUS OMG.

And and and while Crowley was high off his rocker, he clearly says “Where are you??? 😢” and Aziraphale had to reassure him that he was there. So sweet.

Aziraphale and his inability to do literally anything humans do “the normal way” (mobile phone use, be a “newspaper man”, properly drive, learn French properly) while turning around and lowkey mocking Muriel is... something else. What a hypocritical dork.

The realization that they have a WHOLE-ASSED apology dance hit me like a tonne of bricks, and we KNOW it’s coming back in S3. There needs to be an entire cabaret from Azzie this time ‘round, LOL.

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FINAL THOUGHTS

I adored season two, more than season one for sure, and I loved that it built up upon the AziraCrow relationship. It was an interlude that lets us know that they’re sort of in a rut, stuck in a status quo that both are afraid of changing, and that they both need a catalyst event to happen to truly be together.

I remain more hopeful and certain for a satisfying conclusion to their arc than I ever have before. Which is saying a lot because privately, after Sherlock S4, I kind of was ready to not put my faith in another show to canonize a ship I love ever again. 

But there’s a huge difference between this finale and Sherlock S4′s finale: GO S2 DOESN’T feel complete, and Neil wants to finish the story.  I went into more detail about it on this post here, but essentially it boils down to S4 left me feeling hollow and empty because its 4th season felt so detached from what we already saw. It felt like the closing of a book with the wrong pages in it, with no confirmation in sight of concluding the series proper with the S5 they’ve been promising for years. GOS2, on the other hand, left us feeling like everything’s WRONG but in the right way, you know what I mean? Like there is a part two to this saga to be completed. And that Neil himself seems determined to finish the story regardless of what happens.

I like to think that both Michael and David know what Gaiman plans for the endgame of their characters, given that Gaiman HAS said he does “have the final fifteen pages of Episode 6 [...] written. Given what we got in S2 with The Kiss, and Michael and David’s adoration for this story and its characters, I am hopeful that Neil entrusted them with what he wants for AziraCrow. They in turn play those characters better for it. 

So yeah, maybe I’m just putting clown shoes back on with this one, but I will remain... optimistically skeptical. Like, I REALLY want and believe that AziraCrow is endgame, that the Husbands will be actual husbands, but I also will remain skeptical that it can happen and not be upset if it doesn’t. I got a kiss (a terrible one, but a kiss nonetheless). I got a tonne of touching. I got them dancing together. I think that’s more than we ever could have hoped for, and it’s already leagues above what I am used to.

To conclude, here are some more questions, thoughts, and hopes for S3:

There are SO many “Chekov gun” moments in play in S2 currently, little things that really seem so pointless to have introduced (like the apology dance) and I am TRULY hoping that it’s true that Gaiman didn’t put things in this series unless it’s important later. I feel it will all come back around. Where S1 had open and closed plot points, S2 did NOT. 

Why was Crowley able to get into Heaven without any issue? Is THIS part of the Ineffable Plan? Why does Crowley not want anyone to know who he was before the Fall? It’s clear Crowley POSSIBLY knows more than he lets on about Everything. I think he was at one time the Supreme Archangel... Gabriel’s banishment could foreshadow this, given that Gabe is deliberately used as a Crowley mirror in this season.

I hope for a stupidly emotional, makes-me-sob-fat-tears, reunion, confession and acceptance of each other. Oh, and of course, the infamous cottage in Sussex we all hope for. I am a SUCKER for emotional beats and I CRAVE it.

Oh, and a HUGE apology dance from Aziraphale. You introduced that shit, I want to see Azzie go all out in return.

I think Crowley will be the first one to confess verbally. The Gabriel mirror kind of sealed that for me.

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FINALLY, that’s that! Thank you for reading all the way through, if you did. Again, as I alluded to in my introduction, I may expand upon a few sections of this meta on other posts in the upcoming weeks as I catch more and more things, and start integrating other people’s meta into my own theories.

Apologies for any errors in this, it took me nearly 2 days to write and a very tired couple proofreads through it to clean up hanging text.

I hope you enjoyed my foray back into meta-writing, and please, do not hesitate to send me an ask to either of my blogs if you wish for me to expand more on a topic.

Cheers, and good day 💙🖤

[hikarry]

So, back during my writing hiatus years, I got really into angst. Not just your run-of-the-mill "my character is sad" angst, but the deep, soul-crushing kind that makes you stare into the abyss and wonder if you even know happiness. I’m talking existential crisis, doomed love, betrayal that scars you for life, your beloved dying in your arms, the whole shebang. If a story didn’t leave me on the verge of tears or questioning the meaning of existence, was it even worth writing?

Fast forward to now, and somehow, all that brooding intensity has funneled itself into my obsession with “Good Omens.” I mean, Crowley and Aziraphale are practically a walking, talking embodiment of untapped angst potential. Two celestial beings who've been through millennia of cosmic bureaucracy, moral quandaries, and yes, each other’s endless company. And yet, here I am, more invested in their ineffable romance and ready to make them suffer and bleed into my hands.

I mean, think about it: Crowley’s got that “I’m a demon but also a little soft” thing going on, with 6,000 years of pent-up feelings hidden behind those dark shades. He’s the king of internal torment, practically bursting with “I might just be the baddie, but also maybe I don’t want to be?” vibes. And then there’s Aziraphale, who’s like a bundle of suppressed emotions, clinging to his moral high ground while quietly yearning for something more (Crowley, obviously). The potential for angst is off the charts.

How is it that their entire relationship isn’t just one long, drawn-out Shakespearean tragedy? Centuries of unspoken words, repressed desires, and unfulfilled longing—it's enough to make any angst lover's heart ache.

But I guess that’s the magic of “Good Omens.” It’s taken my love for soul-wrenching angst and wrapped it in a package that’s as charming as it is devastating. Crowley and Aziraphale are like a tragic sonnet just waiting to be written, where every line is a blend of heartache and hope. So now I’m still living my best angst-filled life through a demon and an angel who are just one apocalypse away from their happily ever after, hopefully

[vroomian]

Was YRZ really locked up due to his angel form? I have this random theory that Heaven locks up or "erase" famous and capable leaders and radicals that go against the status quo to maintain the peace of heaven. Because honestly, I feel that a lot of philosophers and leaders wouldn't like how Heaven is run all that much.

I figure that a lot of leaders and philosophers don't actually get into heaven lol. just cause you're smart or charismatic doesn't make you good. actually, i feel like it's the opposite for the few that do get in -- the very famous important people are given special privileges (not sainted, that's a separate thing you have to earn from your actions while alive) and get absorbed into the ranks of the bureaucracy pretty fast. they get comfortable.

you know what's uncomfortable? change. So people being people, even in heaven, would prefer to maintain the status quo where they're respected. i doubt anyone ever thinks about how heaven is kind fucked up, because why would they? they're happy.

for yrz, he was locked away initially for his angel form. honestly, if heaven let him out after a couple years when he had more control, he would've been salty but he also would've understood. but yrz made the mistake of sharing his opinion on hell (which might also be my opinion on hell lol), namely: eternal punishment for any crime is monstrously unfair. you're going to let someone be tortured forever because they were an addict???? forever??? do you know how long forever is???? the rules are arbitrary and unclear. any deity who thought the heaven/hell system was the ideal one is a fucking moron and deserves no respect or worship.

ah, thinks heaven's leadership. this outspoken human rights activist who fought the system his whole life might try to change the system that is actively damning people to eternal torment. welp, that's not ideal.

so the locking away was technically not a punishment for yrz! management just -- left him where he was. where he couldn't spread his silly little ideas of fairness around.

[strategicallyignoringmytodolist]

Here's my S3 theory. (I'd be thrilled to hear yours as well.)

I am writing this now so that when S3 finally drops in 24 billion months or whatever, I can look back at my notes and feel very smug and smart. Or laugh at myself for how wrong I got it.

My point is, dolphins. Or rather-- that terrible yet well-written cliffhanger:

At the very very end of S2, as Aziraphale was going up the elevator to Heaven, I'm pretty sure he knew he was going to have to work under cover to prevent the end of the world. Certainly after watching the recordings of Gabriel and what happened when HE protested, Aziraphale would realize that the bureaucracies of Heaven and Hell were determined to get to a final battle.

The Second Coming, from what (admittedly minimal amounts) I've read of it, doesn't have quite as many plot points as the arrival of the Antichrist. Jesus is supposed to show up in a burst of dramatic weather, all the humans who have ever lived are going to be immediately tossed into Heaven or Hell, and... That's about it? (I was actually raised Catholic, but I didn't pay much attention in Sunday school, and as an adult I don't really interact with religion. This isn't my best trivia subject, in other words.)

Anyway, at some sooner-rather-than-later point I think Aziraphale is going to decide to let all the angels and demons who want to fight it out with flaming swords have their go, and he is going to focus on preventing everyone else from getting hurt while that happens. Maybe the final sorting of goodies and baddies is going to involve processing all of humanity through some massive portals. And maybe Aziraphale is going to use his new position of power in Heaven's bureaucracy to change where the portal exit point is. There have been sooo many references to Alpha Centauri in the first two seasons, and that's presumably where Beelzebub and Gabriel went at the end of S2. I bet they would be willing to help with portal setup and receiving refugees on their end.

I'm not entirely certain what Crowley's role will be in S3. I can totally picture Aziraphale coming to him and saying, "Let's run off to Alpha Centauri together, only I've got several billion humans I want to bring with me." Maybe Crowley will have to help with portal setup down in the basement offices of hell. Or maybe he will need to convince Jesus to join Team Save Humanity (Crowley was friendly with Jesus once upon a time and did show him all the kingdoms of the world, after all.)

I think there are going to be some funny bits with the Nazi zombies from past seasons and all the other people who are being raised from the dead.

In the original book, Adam said that Heaven and Hell were a lot like his gang, the Them, and their rival gang, the Johnsonites: They were always trying to beat one another, but it wouldn't be any good if one of them actually did win. Having a rival gives you something to do, after all. I don't think there can ever be a final resolution between good and bad. They're kind of like death -- baked into the system. It's going to be a stalemate.

I also suspect that God is playing a many-layered game. All the demons and angels are helping to judge and deliver consequences to humans for their use of free will. But maybe God is watching all the angels and demons to see whether they understand that being on a team doesn't mean that you can't make your own moral decisions and act outside the party line.

Ultimately I think the battle will end and the human refugees will return to Earth. Our favorite supernatural couple will buy a flat with a garden somewhere, and that's where the story will end -- in a garden, just as it began.