#anf I've been thinking about stanford dean and pilot dean and how lonely he was and how young and—
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I think it's not fair of me to want anything tbh
#I'm above begging because I'm an egotistical bitch who wants people to see them just like that#and to put up with the anxious attachment and the abandonment issues and the struggle to express how i feel by saying it#and the trying to make people leave and being overly protective and too much and not enough and overall just... difficult#and i expect people to be okay with that and to want to deal with it which isn't fair#and sure I'm working on it and people deserve someone better i just- yeah idk#also just rewatched the pilot#anf I've been thinking about stanford dean and pilot dean and how lonely he was and how young and—#and i miss the friends i used to have and i hate that i let the people down i care about most in the world#and i feel like I'm poison and.... fuck dude#txt.
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