#andi you are as brilliant as you are evil and that is NOT a compliment

[messrsbyler]

it's me, hi! i'm the problem it's me. (actually no. you're the problem. you started this. i made it worse… then you made it worse 2x. then… ok we're both the problem here.)

so i did not sleep very well last night and i am embarrassed to admit it was because i had such an overactive brain bc of this au. (also i drank too much coffee yesterday. woops.)

first i want to explore your thoughts on what happens when will gets kidnapped and then later "possessed" (using that term for a lack of a better word, simply bc atla world doesn't really have psychic abilities and stuff, so whatever our variation of this is might be less of a possession and more just losing control over his bending in some way) and basically just his whole mess with henry. because i was thinking about it, and well like... the upside down doesn't really exist, obviously? and then what replaces the demogorgon and the demodogs and other monsters? evil spirits? (that could be cool, definitely a consideration) oh my god does will get dragged into the spirit world did i just answer my own question? my baby boy dragged into the darkest parts of the spirit world and maybe even having some sort of brief interaction with henry (who... has just been chilling there? passing time? yep we'll go with that) el being able to find him through meditation? OH OK LET'S TALK ABOUT THAT NIC

second i started thinking about it last night. and how airbending, i think about it and my brain goes to like... breathing. mostly because of this scene. and THEN i got to thinking about how airbending is the element of freedom, which is super fucking ironic because that scene is a brutal murder by ripping away someone's ability to do the very baseline function that allows them to live: breathing. and THEN i also got to thinking about... huh. where have we seen that before?

*gestures to will with the vine in his throat in s1, gestures to will getting attacked by the mind flayer on the field as it enters his mouth and literally all his orifices, gestures to will telling dr owens in s2e1 "No. Like how you feel when you're scared, and you can't breathe or talk or do anything." and also will telling the party in s3e4 "Your body... it goes cold and... and you can't breathe."

interesting very interesting how it's subtly there in the st canon (not that i think there's all that much to it in the show's canon, though please if you have thoughts i wanna hear them), but in the atla/st au event of the century. there is a LOT THERE.

because now i'm just imagining henry doing that sort of thing that zaheer does to the queen to will or whatever advanced ancient form of airbending that he does to will is similar to it, and maybe we replace the vine in the mouth with like an attempt to do that to will that failed. so henry comes back. and tries again. but THEN we get the beautiful wonderful hurt/comfort of will, who is an airbender and who actually has always loved his bending now being scared of his element and knowing it was a fellow airbender (though not knowing who yet) that did this to him. will getting panic attacks where he remembers what happened to him. will not being able to breathe and being so fucking scared in the aftermath of his experience in the spirit world and his near death experience.

also rewinding a little bit to will's near death: joyce and hopper trying to revive will as henry slinks away back into the darkness. joyce sobbing because she can't lose will obviously, but also because she specifically did not allow jonathan (an airbender, remember?) to come with them because she was scared of losing him too. but joyce thinking about how if she had brought jonathan he absolutely could've saved will with his bending. and how if will dies here in her arms, joyce knows both she and jonathan will never forgive themselves. joyce begging her little boy, her airbender who loves the sky and loves the freedom and who is so full of the joy and childlike wonder of the air nation, to just breathe. praying to the spirits that he could breathe, that there would be air in his lungs, etc. etc.

wow andi got off on a rambly topic there. that was not the point to this. i have 10 minutes before i have to log onto work let's do this.

my POINT WAS. will with ptsd after his kidnapping, right? will not being able to breathe well, gasping constantly, having panic attacks. well, guess what is wonderful about a certain best friend of his and his native element.

"Power in Firebending comes from the breath. Not the muscles. The breath becomes energy in the body." - uncle iroh my GUY!

mike, who has never quite been able to grasp that part of firebending because it's fucking annoying. mike, impatient and petulant and angry that he's forced to sit through stupid breathing exercises while nancy excels and excels and excels. mike, whose firebending is weak because it's not coming from the right place, so much like zuko who just originally lets his anger/frustration fuel him.

mike sits with will.

and they learn how to breathe again. together.

on to book 2: earth 🫡

(yes we are the problem and we look great being the problem, it suits us)

the way you sent this ask and replied to yourself in the first paragraph bc that's how great your brain is. okay but listen listen, the spirit world being the parallel of the UD is just... perfect? and yes the monsters would be the dark spirits AND think about it. the avatar is the bridge between worlds sort of like el is the bridge between the real world and the UD with her connection to the UD and her ability to go into the void and into the UD mentally without having to enter physically JUST LIKE AANG??!! so will is taken to the spirit world and because he spends so much time there he forms a connection to it? that grants him a new ability he didn't have before? kinda reminds me how iroh could see aang in roku's dragon so what if will is now able to look into the spirit world too? there's something more to be explored there but tell me why those parallels work SO NICELY?

ok ok but since in canon brenner takes el and when he learns about the UD she tries to train her to contact the monsters... what if brenner in the atla au learned that this waterbender from this small tribu was the avatar and took her so everyone else thinks the cycle broke because no new avatar was born. and OMG WHAT IF BRENNER KEEPS THAT INFORMATION FROM EL? that she is the avatar. ofc el would know she is different from the other benders from the place where she is isolated, she can control all elements, but she wouldn't know about what an avatar is and the prophecy that rests on her shoulders.

so why brenner would take el and train her to enter the spirit world? he wants to find someone there (henry) just like in canon but WHY? why is henry in the spirit world if he's a mortal and a normal bender, why brenner knows henry is in the spiritual world and WHY does brenner want to find him. what makes henry the villain of the story in the atla au. we need answers andi!!!

would brenner be too much of a fool wanting to control the spiritual world through el, using her as the bridge?

i see you are showing your true colors now, huh? made me feel comfortable, lower my walls, expose my weak spots and then you hit me with this. evil. EVIIIIIIIL. i should call you flayed andi for this one.

WHY WOULD YOU BRING THIS PARALLEL WITH BREATHING AND HOW BREATHING IS A IMAGINARY THEY KEEP USING WITH WILL AND VECNA TAKING WILL'S FREEDOM BY TAKING THE AIR AWAY FROM HIS LUNGS??????? OUCH OUCH OUCH

no but like that you ALSO form a parallel between el/brenner's and will/henry's dynamics? one being all about corrupted techniques that take away someone's freedom (brenner with bloodbending and henry with that technique from zaheer) and how both will and el having had those techniques in THEIR OWN NATIVE OF BENDING used against them broke them and made them fear of their own bending abilities but then when they escape their abusers and find friends THEY RECONNECT WITH THEIR WITH THEIR BENDING BECAUSE THEY LEARN THEIR BENDING ABILITY DOESN'T MAKE THEM DANGEROUS OR BAD IT'S HOW THEY USE THOSE ABILITIES GIVES THEM THEIR WORTH. just picture el and will being so curled so deep inside their shells but lucas being there for el showing her how their bending not only means control over others like brenner taught her, it can also mean healing others and how healing others can also heal el herself I'M EMOTIONAL JUST THINKING ABOUT IT!!! and robin teaching will (and jonathan bc even though lonnie never pulled something so brutal like using henry's technique he still abused jonathan and took away part of his freedom from his bending) how airbending is ALL ABOUT FREEDOM!! it's about being a free spirit, about lifting off the earth, about connecting and flying and just BEING FREE.

but yes, rewinding a bit, before will can learn how to make peace with his bending he is just scared of it, of exactly what you said, a fellow airbender corrupting their art to make him stop breathing. will getting panic attacks, not being able to breathe. what if will feels like he is broken? an airbender who can't even breathe properly? how can he try to bend air when he can't even keep the air inside his lungs? because now every time he tries to bend air he feels like his throat closes and his chest burns because bending itself is a trigger to his ptsd that brings him back to that moment when henry used that technique on him. WHAT THEN ANDI WHAT THEN????

AND NOOOO YOU ALREADY WENT FOR THE FINAL BLOW WHY ADD JOYCE'S GUILT ON THIS FOR NOT BRINGING JONATHAN?? AND ALSO JONATHAN'S GUILT FOR NOT INSISTING FOR ONCE AGAIN NOT BEING THERE WHEN WILL NEEDED HIM FOR BEING A BAD BROTHER (even if that's so far from the truth) IMAGINE IF WILL HAD DIED THEN NOOOOOOOO

also thinking about joyce telling will to breathe, it reminded me of joyce begging will to wake up in season two on the football field. so, if we keep the UD as the spiritual world that after being there trapped he grew a connection with it, then that was will entering the spiritual world for some reason...

joyce begging her little boy, her airbender who loves the sky and loves the freedom and who is so full of the joy and childlike wonder of the air nation, to just breathe. praying to the spirits that he could breathe, that there would be air in his lungs, etc. etc.

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP THIS BROKE ME ANDI. HER AIRBENDER WHO LOVES THE SKY AND THE FREEDOM NOOOOOOO I'M ABOUT TO TEAR UP WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME

NO NO NO you are so right THIS IS GENIUS!!! ANDI YOUR BRAIN!!! mike and will learning to breathe together i will cry I WILL CRY mike always dodging his breathing lessons because he can't even do that right, because he feels like there's no helping it either way, his self-esteem is so low it affects his bending so what's the use in practicing his breathing? his bending will always be weak and will never meet the standars nancy has set for him. but then will needs him, will needs to learn how to breathe again, how to let the air into his lungs, and mike needs to be there for him, has the need to hold will's hand to ground him, to let him know he is here in the physical world with him, right where mike can reach him so he doesn't float away, so no one can take him away from him.

and if in the middle of a session that lands on a bad day because will had nightmares all night long, because he feels the goosebumps at the back of his neck as if henry as breathing there, mocking him while he forced the air out of his lungs, what if in the middle of a session then will can't bring himself to breathe. he keeps hitching his breaths in, hiccuping, so mike reaches for will's hand and presses it to his own chest, and tells will to follow the movement, how mike's chest expands with each breath, how he only has to focus on that. and will does, with his eyes closed, noticing the come and go of mike's chest but also the beating of his heart hidden somewhere underneath there, and will also focuses on that. because mike is the heart that guides them all and now it is guiding will so he can breathe once more.

THATS A MESS BUT I HOPE YOU GET MY POINT AHSDJASDH

OKAY THIS IS SO LONG ALREADY I WARNED YOU BUT STILL AAAHHHHHH

[gavillain]

So with the year about to close, I’m once again doing my annual Top Ten Villains of This Year list. My personal rule for doing this: these characters are judged solely on the merits of their 2018 appearances, and I’m not going to include any villain who has appeared on last year’s list (which you can read here), even if they would still make the cut. Also bear in mind that this is only from media that I actually saw/read/played this year, so forgive me if your favorite isn’t here because I might not have seen them. New December movies in particular slipped through my fingers.

List under the cut

10. Lotor (Voltron: Legendary Defender)

Ever since Lotor first debuted, he's never been villainous enough for me. He's been positioned in villainous roles, but he never really did anything all that bad or evil. Season six, however, sees the true depth of his evil finally get revealed. His obsession with his Altean heritage and loathing of his Galra side is interesting from a psychological perspective, and his actions as the seemingly benevolent but truly vicious leader of the Altean refugees really highlight how truly sinister this guy was. He has quite a lot of blood on his hands all done to fuel his thirst for power. The final battle with him in the quintessence field was pretty cool too. I love seeing normally refined and restrained villains just totally lose it and go balls to the wall psycho and that's exactly what we got. We really finally got to see Lotor for who he was beneath all of the false masks he showed to Team Voltron and the audience, and, for that, I definitely consider him one of the year's best.

9. Barbara Kean (Gotham)

Gotham every year always has a great villain to highlight, and while I assume most Gotham fans are coming out of this year talking about the Valeska brother, I think Barbara Kean really showed her stuff this year. Barbara's had an interesting journey on the show, going from a bland love interest to a psycho ex-girlfriend to a Fish Mooney esque crime boss to this season becoming the heir of Ra's al Ghul himself. This year we saw Barbara Kean inherit Ra's al Ghul's mantel as the Demon's Head and assuming control over the League of Assassins. She proceeded to immediately put the sexist men in their place and established a lethal team of female assassins to serve her. It's fun to see Barbara taking on a new mantel and even being instrumental in taking down the original Ra's al Ghul when his schemes go too far. Her ultimately taking charge as the leader of the Gotham Sirens and declaring her turf a violently men-free-zone is a fun touch that I look forward to seeing get followed up in season five.

8. Magica DeSpell (DuckTales)

When I first heard that the DuckTales reboot was building up Magica DeSpell as some serious business Big Bad, I was definitely among those scratching my head. Magica had always just been a reoccurring funny villain with wacky hijinks rather than anyone who acted as a true Knight of Cerebus. However, 2017 DuckTales pulled it off and did so WONDERFULLY. Magica is not only a big serious villain and threat; she also maintains her same charismatic and funny personality. You see her manipulating Lena to giving up her body and unleashing ultimate darkness whilst still cracking jokes and going after Scrooge's number one dime. It's hard to balance genuine serious villainy with comedy, and it's a balancing act that the Disney villains of the 90s had down pat. And that's exactly what Magica feels like: a harkening back to that golden breed of Disney villains, and I hope to see her continue on in season two.

7. The Sanderson Sisters (Hocus Pocus: The All New Sequel)

This was the twenty-fifth anniversary of Hocus Pocus, and, to celebrate, Disney released a sequel novel that included both a novelization of the original film and an all new story set years later. The Sanderson Sisters are iconic and hilarious villains who have long been among my all time faves, so seeing them return in book form was a rare treat. This time, the Sandersons are scheming to bring all of the witches back from Hell to take over the world, and it's pretty scary reading Winnie's evil literally sending innocent people to Hell to exchange for evil witches. Mary also gets a solo musical number about her relationship with Winnie that's a lot of fun and sheds a new light on her character. It's operating at about the same level as A Twisted Tale in terms of quality so it's not hitting anything out of the ballpark, but seeing the Sandersons get treated to new content coinciding with their twenty-fifth anniversary is really fun and is worth their inclusion for sure.

6. Killmonger and Klaue (Black Panther)

The biggest movie of the year also gave us two of the very BEST villains of the year in the form of Killmonger and Klaue. Klaue, as portrayed by Andy Serkis, is naturally fun as a sinister and charismatic thief and arms dealer, filling sort of the "funny villain" quotient for the film. He's enjoyable and a treat to watch every time he's on screen. He's an evil white man who is raping African of its natural resources out of his sense of greed and entitlement. Killmonger compliments that nicely by being one of the deepest and most thought provoking character in the entire MCU. Killmonger is fun because not only is he sadistic and someone who enjoys bloodshed, he's also driven by righteous anger over the way that Wakanda has turned its back on black people globally. He has a desire to turn all of that around and remake the world. He may be cold and ruthless, but you can also see where he's coming from and that makes him all the more effective.

5. Salem (RWBY)

Salem, since her debut, has been a generic evily evil who eviled for some evil evil and never really had any texture at all besides being a vague evil. All of that changed this season of RWBY. We now know Salem and Ozpin's backstory. I was enthralled and mystified the entire time during their backstory. The animation, the story telling, everything was top notch. Salem is a woman who was cursed by immortality that hardened her into someone bitter and angry. She lost the man she loved once through death and then after his reincarnation, she lost him through his own fear of what she had become. She really feels like the type of character who is a tragic figure of myth at this point, and I loved how her motivation seems to stem from a bitterness at the gods and a desire to end the world that they created. Very fun for an arch-villain.

4. Red Goblin (The Amazing Spider-Man)

Dan Slott's decade long run as head writer of the Amazing Spider-Man came to an end earlier this year with a grand finale to end all grand finales: Norman Osborn, the Green Goblin, rediscovers Spider-Man's secret identity and bonds with the Carnage symbiote to form the Red Goblin. Now, on some level, I find that whole concept to be very fanwanky, but, on the other, it's REALLY fucking cool. Yeah, Spider-Man writers have a tendency to continuously try to tell the next great Norman Osborn story, and, while this doesn't really rank in my top five, it's a worthy effort. I appreciate how it shows off how vicious and relentless Norman is. Him just fire bombing random people on the street to get under Peter's skin in particular is one of those great twisted moments. I also liked seeing Norman corrupt his grandson Normie Osborn with the symbiote and getting a grandpa's little monster serving him. It's got that fun "he's an assassin and a hostage rolled into one effect. And, of course, the Red Goblin left a permanent mark on Spider-Man history by being the villain who murdered Flash Thompson, long time friend and ally of Peter.

3. Obake (Big Hero 6)

The Big Hero 6 TV show has been a slam dunk for Disney television. Bringing in the same creative minds behind Kim Possible, the show has a great "loving parody of he superhero genre" feel to it whilst still being an epic hero show in its own right, and six heroes are only as good as their villain. Voiced by Andrew Scott of Jim Moriarty fame, Obake is an evil genius mastermind who's always in control of a situation and always crafting diabolical and brilliant schemes. Obake is in many respects a dark image of what Hiro could become: a man who refuses to limit his brilliance by morals or familial ties. His brain has outright been damaged to where his conscience doesn't check him and this brain damage IS slowly killing him, but he accepts it as a reasonable price for his perspective free of morality. But in the end, his schemes were all that he had, and when he's defeated, he has no reason to live and effectively commits suicide after letting Baymax go. There's a really great tragedy to the way he ends up. And, on top of that, he's just a really interesting and charismatic villain with fun quirks, fun minions, and engaging schemes. Easily one of the very best villains to come out of Disney television. 2. Doctor Octopus (Spider-Man PS4)

One of the really smart features of Insomniac's Spider-Man game is that Octavius is actually not Doctor Octopus at all for the first half of the game. Octavius is Peter's friend and boss, and the two of them are working together on cybernetic appendages for prosthetic limbs that respond to the brain waves just like regular limbs. Octavius has a degenerative brain diseases that is causing him to slowly lose control of his motor functions. As such, when he thinks he has the solution, he's overly hasty to use it even though the cerebral interface has a dangerous impact on his personality and moods. It causes him to act upon his worth impulses, particularly his resentment and anger towards Norman Osborn. This turns him into the Doctor Octopus who we all know, much to Peter's sadness. Peter ends up struggling a lot in this game over whether Octavius is worth saving, and it tears him apart when they reach their climax. No spoilers, but it's POWERFUL writing and acting. I particularly like how this version of the characters takes a little from every single iteration of the character without ever feeling unfresh. He has that personal connection and tragic element of the Raimi Ock, he has the intelligent master criminal side of the comics version, he has a design that echoes the sort of "I may be an overweight nerd but I can still kick your ass" appeal of the Spectacular Spider-Man version, and yet they still find his own unique sweet spot of characterizations that perfectly blends with the Insomniac Spider-Man world. I particularly enjoy his use of the Sinister Six and how he gets them all under his control by using his intelligence to give them each what they want so that they're all in debt, but they all genuinely seem to enjoy and admire him. That's an excellent retelling of the Sinister Six that's far more interesting than just "We all hate Spider-Man so let's team up to fight him."

1. Venom (Venom)

This was honestly the biggest and weirdest surprise of the year for me. See, the whole idea of a Venom solo movie is a uniformly bad idea from basically the word "Go." Oh yes, let's do a movie about a villain whose entire character revolves around being a dark version of Spider-Man in a movie that completely omits Spider-Man so that the villain can be the protagonist. That won't backfire at all. Well, of course, it totally backfired into a complete mess, but it happened to create a mess that was entertaining and enjoyable and had an absolutely wonderful and fun take on the Venom character. This film leans hard into the romantic side of Eddie and the Venom symbiote's bond and sort of formats itself as a gay alien romcom. Eddie is a journalist who wants to be a hero through his reporting, but he pursues it at the expense of every meaningful relationship he has. Venom is the runt of his alien litter who on Earth suddenly finds himself as the big fish in a small pond, and he likes it that way. In Venom, Brock finds a relationship that allows him to indulge his savior complex that won't be destroyed by it, and in Brock, Venom finds someone who allows him to indulge his power trip and sense of narcissism. They complete one another. Yes, it's stupid. Yes, it's cheesy. No, it's NOT the Venom we know at all. But, yes, it's a fun and effective route to take the character in the absence of Spider-Man. The thing is that the reason why it's so fun is pretty much all Tom Hardy. Tom Hardy has a weird awful accent, but he also gives this weirdly camp performance that's just captivating and fun. It actually reminds me a bit of Jack Sparrow in a way in that it's so out there, you can't help but he enamored. The Venom symbiote has fun banter and chemistry with Hardy, and the humor is on point. You've got Venom eating gangsters as people around him under-react, and he just shrugs it off with a one-liner. It's that type of thing, and, honestly, I love it. Like when the movie is Tom Hardy and Venom being goofy murder bros together, it's fun and engaging. Eddie himself is definitely more hero than villain, but Venom absolutely counts as far as I’m concerned, even if he is restrained by Eddie’s moral code by the end of it. It's exactly the type of ridiculous villain protagonist fantasy that it needed to be, and even though Venom isn't the main antagonist of his story, he's still easily my favorite villain of 2018... I have no idea what that says about me XD

Also I have all three of Spider-Man's big archenemies on this list in the reverse order that I usually like them XD That's fun lol

[savagegardenforever]

Darren's Diaries

These are Darren's Diaries from the first tour (Future of Earthly Delites/To the Moon And Back) from 1998.

There are six entries - 4th July, 7th July, 12th July, 20th July, 15th August and 8th September.

4th July

   Well here I am sitting on a tour bus. It's a twelve    sleeper and there are 8 of us...Daniel and I...our band...and our tour manager. We have    completed over 50 shows since the start of this tour in Australia in January. Finally we    are in America. For the next two months we will be playing 40 shows in the States and    Canada. It is going to be an incredible experience. Exciting and Exhausting I'm sure.

So far we started production rehearsals in Rockford Illinois. Our first show    was in Chicago for the B96 radio show with Boyz to Men and Mariah Carey. Minneapolis was    next. We then travelled into Canada for two incredible shows in Saskatoon then Edmonton.    As I type this we are headed for Calgury. The Canadian audiences have been really cool.    Very into the music and very LOUD!!

Our band are playing really well together. I am very proud to be on    the stage with them every night. We have Anna Maria Laspina and Nicole McIntyre on backing    vocals. Karl Lewis on Drums. Ben Carey on Guitars and Lee Novak on Bass. I have included    some pictures of us during hot and sweaty production rehearsals. You'll also find the new    stage clothes provided by Diesel and on my fave pics ever...Me with fans after the    Minneapolis gig.

Sharing a tour bus together is kinda strange. It's    like...HUGE...with two loungerooms with tables and videos and soundsystems etc...then    there is a little kitchen where we all make cups of tea and sandwhiches after gigs. It's    almost like the Brady Bunch on Tour. Our beds have little T.V's in them and little    curtains to block out the rabble. It's actually a lot more comfortable than I thought it    would be. Let me get back to you on that in a few weeks though!

7th July  

 So now I'm on my way from Seattle to    Portland. Still on the bus...I swear it's like the Partridge Family. I took a little    family shot to demonstrate how pathetic and domesticated we have all become. Andy our bus    driver is very cool...he makes me vegetarian meals sometimes... and puts up with our table    manners.

The Vancouver show was probably one of the tightest    shows we have played ever...good crowd...and we were really on it. It's so funny...I just    read a report from Edmontone where the reviewer thought that maybe I lip synch my vocals    because...in his words..."Hayes hits some unnaturally high notes.."!!!    I think that is so ironic. I mean...I have good nights...and bad nights. Sometimes I sing    up a storm...and other nights it's not quite what I want it to be. To have someone think    it's all on tape is kind of an indirect compliment. I guess it means I sang well!! I'll    tell you...last night in Seattle...I was WISHING my vocals were on tape...I was so tired.    But the crowd seemed to get into it and by half way through I was in my own little world.

Playing live is definately something we are proud of. I personally    have a big problem with 'artists' who mime...or lip synch...or whatever you wanna call it.    I believe that seeing a band live is warts and all. If I hit a bum note...then so be    it...that is what you pay for. If I hit a brilliant note...then that's fantastic. That's    what makes some nights INCREDIBLE...and others not so. You never know. Also I figure if    you want to listen to the cd...stay home. Coming out to see a band live is all about    living in the moment.

So after the Portland show we get a much needed day off...before we    start the San Fransisco, L.A , Vegas leg. Viva Las Vegas Baby.

Outta here...

12th July

       Before anything happens I gotta tell you that playing    in Red Rocks...Colorado was the most incredible experience for me. The setting was like    something from heaven..the weather was incredible. It actually rained the entire show but    the 7000 plus crowd stayed to the end... It was so magical. The thunder and lightning in    that historical venue...and the crowd. It made me very emotional.

I kept thinking of U2's "Under a blood red sky" live    album...recorded there. It was just the same as it looked all those years ago when I sat    in my lounge room watching the video...looking at my heros. To play there...was a VERY big    deal for me.

I'm in San Antonio Texas writing this...in my hotel room. Just came    back from a fantastic show here. What a cool crowd. I really dig this town. It looks    NOTHING like the rest of Texas... Last night we went out and had fantastic Mexican food    and drank Starbucks while walking along the riverbank in the middle of the city...with all    cafe's and restaurants along the river edge. It was incredible...the night was windy and    the temperature was not as hot as it apparently has been. I thought in this email I would    include some more personal photos of the band and our crew...There is this beautiful man    from Texas called Chuck...who has been married for 25 years. Chuck is a sound/monitor    engineer on our tour. His daughter Victoria has these adorable little twins Joseph and    Jacob...so I managed to get a cuddle of the babies before our show in San Antonio tonite.    Boy did I get clucky. It was Nicole's birthday today...it's Daniel's on Wednesday...so we    have kind of been celebrating for a few days now. Nicole and Anna (our backing singers)    are dear friends of mine...and we have a blast.

We get along really well with Sneaky Pete...the production    assistant. He is evil...in the funniest way. His assistant Laurie is THE BIGGEST    SWEETHEART. I included a picture of me hugging her because she is my lifeline.

She is in charge of all sorts of things...but for me..her main job    is making sure the dressing rooms are set up...wardrobe and costumes are set out and    laundered...candles are lit...music is playing...holdiays are booked and roses sent to    family members. Basically she is my mom on the road...and she is incredible. Her attention    to detail makes coming into the dressing room such a pleasure..everything from my after    shave to the kind of tea I drink...she is aware of..and makes sure it is all in order.

I also included a picture of Daniel playing with his new Keyboard    backstage with Lindsay...one of our other fave people. Linds is a guitar tech on this    tour...but really he is an awesome drummer...who last worked with Pearl Jam doing drum    tech for them. Just the sweetest person.

Who else can I tell you about?? Motley our lighting designer is a    little yoda...he is so spiritual and deep..and a dear friend. Collin Ellis mixes our    sound...and is a very nice bloke!!

Crash...our sound engineer on stage..(does in ear monitors...) told    me tonite that the reason I get soo tired is that I need to 'take more exercise.'    Hahaha... I work out 5 or 6 days a week...two hours a day...as well as doing the show!!    The entire band just cracked up laughing at him. Oh well...he was only trying to help. He    is very funny...and oh..also good at his job.

I am getting excited because we are about to have three days off!!    Whoo hoo!! I mean...I love the tour...but I have been working on this album for 2 and a    half years...and touring it since January. We are all very tired...and looking forward to    the rest. When we start up again we will be HALF WAY... That is pretty cool.

Last night I couldn't sleep because I was dreaming up the name...the front cover and the artwork for our new album. All we need now is the music!! Haha...

I am rambling...but it's late...and life is really good. God bless.

Darren

20th July

           Hey...welcome back to the tour. We have missed you. Let    me take you now to a very sacred place. This is my bed in the tour bus. I call it my    'monkey bunk'...don't ask me why...it's kinda private...! But that's what I call it...    Actually I have become quite fond of it. To the point that I am finding it hard to sleep    in regular beds now. I am used to the constant rocking of the highway. There is a little    T.V in there...but I rarely watch it. By the time my head hits the pillow...I am out! It    is actually very soothing...and I am someone who finds sleeping very difficult.

We have had a ball on tour with our new support...Billy Myers.

Billy Myers is just FANTASTIC. She is very talented...as are her    band. Billy is also VERY VERY funny. Here is a picture of her and I in my dressing room    about two seconds before our show in Miami. This was the day of our manager...Rebecca's    birthday. We got her all sorts of nice presents and this huge cake. Here is a picture of    my face in the cake.

Long Story! I am commonly known as 'tabu' in the band because I kind    of...well...I just take things to the extreme in terms of practical jokes and goofing about. Usually with birthday cakes I end of throwing them all over people...and sticking them to walls etc. You know...normal things like that. So this time the band got me  first...Laurie..our production GODDESS pushed my face into it when I was PRETENDING to  take a big bite. GRRRR!! Florida was hot and steamy...and reminded me very much of  Australia. Played some great shows...although something really stupid happened in Fort Lauderdale. For some bizarre reason..security allowed five audience members to run onto the stage during Truly Madly Deeply. But I don't mean just running up to say hello. They kind of scared the hell out of all of us...and ruined a beautiful moment in the song. We virtually didn't end the show...because they just wouldn't leave the stage. So we all learned a valuable lesson in security. I had my eyes closed as I sang the last notes of the last song of the night...and felt the stair case rumble...and when I looked up there  were three people on the stage with me. It just made no sense to me...I tried to talk to the girl...even say hi...but she was screaming...while her boyfriend spent his time  telling aggressively informing anyone who would listen that he had every right to be there    on stage because he won an after show pass.!!! THIS WAS DURING THE SHOW!!! I look back now  and kinda laugh it off but in the moment...I really felt that the incident ruined to mood    for the rest of the audience. I didn't really get to say goodbye to the crowd...we just    had to leave.

I spent my few days off in New York while the rest of the band  travelled to Myrtle Beach and apparently had a blast. I keep missing the really good    unexpected fun times. Apparently the break in New Orleans was wild as well. There will be news about this in the next fanzine I believe.

Delaware...Harrington was such a bizarre experience. We played at    the State Fair. This was a 4 hour drive from New York...in the middle of nowhere... A    great show with a really enthusiastic audience. Afterwards we went to the local TGI    Friday's restaurant and everyone who had a cell phone was informed that the band were    there...so we spent our evening binge eating while locals watched in horror. Our visit to    the local bowling alley was hilarious. I of course...the king of cool (really just a cover    for my lack of physical ability in sports) refused to play. For 'fashion reasons' I said.    But I don't think anyone believed me. I took a photo of their shoes.

Daniel refused to let me photograph his involvement in this    activity...but let's just say...at bowling...HE RULES. He beat the pants off everyone.

Here is my reaction to bowling... my thrilled to be bowling face.

And this is really what we have been reduced to. Bowling. Oh    yeah...we also play pictionary a lot. All jokes aside...we have had such a wonderful time    so far...it's already August ...and the tour has only 4 weeks to go. I think we are all    going to be very sad when it ends. We have just spent so much time together...we really do    feel like family.

We have met so many wonderful fans...been treated like royalty and  we want to thank you so much for coming out to see us play live. More soon I guess!

15th August

       I am once again sitting at the desk in the kitchen of    our tour bus. We are travelling from Missouri to Illinois. Can you believe that we have    performed 30 shows already on the North American leg of this tour? We have only 9 more    shows left and then the tour is officially over. We started in Australia in January...then on to New Zealand...Asia... Including Japan and India...Europe...and finally America. I  think when it winds up we will have played almost 80 shows. That's a pretty good feeling you know...I had no idea I would have the stamina to get through...and yet here we are looking at the end of the tour...and really the end of this album.

Here are a couple of shots from our show tonight in Missouri.  It's such a long way from where it all started.

It's funny you know... with this site I have tried really hard to    document all sorts of experiences...and not just the musical ones. Yesterday in    Indianapolis I decided that real life was just a little too normal...so I invented a drama    so that I could write about it...and photograph it...and present it to you...(How sad is    that!!)

To cut a long story short... Nicky and I decided to 'steal' a golf cart from the Indianapolis state fair officials. Well...we didn't really 'steal' it..we  kinda just borrowed it and deceived a few people into thinking that our backstage passes  were really licenses to drive a golf buggy. Here is a picture of our initial Evil plan...

It was so funny. Our crew and the security at the venue didn't know    what was happening. I actually took the buggy INTO the arena...where all the fans were    taking their seats for Billie Myers (BY THE WAY..BIG APOLOGY FOR SPELLING HER NAME WRONG    LAST UPDATE...!!!) So anyway...Nikky and I were spinning and flying around the    arena...some of the audience recognized me and started chasing the golf buggy. Although    fun...golf carts are NOT good escape vehicles. I managed to get away by fooling the    security guard that 'everything was in order'.

The cart was returned with lots of apologies and no feelings hurt.

Lots has happened since I last wrote. I never really told you about  the band's new obsession with Golf did I?? It kind of stems from Dan...but everyone...excluding me...has been getting into it. Anna and I generally work out...like A    LOT...which can be exhausting when on tour because you sweat so much on stage as    well...but it has been an adventure just trying to find gyms in every town we go to... But    we have been pretty successful so far.

Today I went crazy recording items in our dressing room. Don't ask    me why...but here are snapshots of shoes...and sunglasses. Lets face it...in Savage    Garden...these are very important elements of our success...(joke!!)

It's weird...I just figured I would have LOVED to have seen stupid    photos of Michael Jackson's wardrobe when I was like...a kid...so I figured...for those of    you out there who enjoy the small details... this is for you.

We really have had such fun with Billie Myers. Her band are very    talented...and friendly. Billie herself is incredible. Such an artist. I watched her    performing 'Tell Me' and 'Kiss the Rain' yesterday in Indianapolis and I was very moved.    She ran all over the stage...climbed EVERYTHING...and ended up at the back of the    auditorium with the audience...still singing. I will be very sad to say goodbye because I    have learned a lot just being around her. Beautiful soul. True performer.

Here is another pic of Billie and I just before the Missouri show.

Our shows have been wonderful lately. The crowds have just been    getting better and better. Some of the small towns have been incredible experiences. We    played a HUGE show in Bethlehem P.A. It was part of their MusikFest festival...and it was    one of the largest shows they have had there. Truly magical.

Soon we head to New York...(DUH...my fave city) for a few days as we    are involved in a private SECRET event that will be revealed to you in due time. But I am    very much looking forward to being there...

I will keep you updated.

Darren

8th September

It's over. 8 months and 85 shows later here we are    on a plane back to real life. I am so exhausted as I type this...and really unsure as to    how it all feels. I am going to go back for you...a few weeks to catch up on everything    that lead up to this final moment of reflection. I remember telling you in my last update    that we were in New York for a "secret" gig...well I can tell you now it was for    the Elite Modelling agency Look competition...and we performed at this club in Manhattan    called Life. It is one of those velvet rope deals...and to be honest...I had never been in    until that night.

We performed a very short set in front of a room full of beautiful    women..and famous people. Jerry Seinfeld was there... Apparently he offered to meet us    when we had sold 12 million albums as opposed to the 8 million that we actually    have. Haha. Thanks for the homework Mr. Seinfeld. Afterwards he hung out in the same foofy    area with us...smoking cigars, flanked by burly security guards. Anna said hi. I was too    busy working out how to sell 4 more million albums.

Our set was GREAT...some people say one of the best we have played    because of it's simplicity and audacity. We just PLAYED...didn't really give a damn...and    it paid off. We headed off ... back to the rest of the tour...but soon ended up back in    planet Manhattan (that's what Motley our lighting designer calls it...as it is like no    other place on earth) after our Boston gig (very pretty btw...nice venue) to play the    Beacon Theatre. What an experience THAT was.

Madonna attended. Rod Stewart was there with wife and kids. We were    sold out. Need I say there was a little tension in the air. But it turned out to be such a    powerful show...such an energy to it. Probably because of the whole Madonna vibe. Thing    is...Billie Myers had heard me singing "Ray of Light" at soundcheck...and told    Madonna and friends that we do it well. The day of our show we get a phone call from    executives asking where in our show it is performed as Madonna is possibly coming along to    have a look. Of course we freaked out...of course we immediately added it to our show even    though we have never performed it as a band!!

So Madonna did attend...and from all accounts...was standing and    grooving with the rest of them...and had a smile on her face... What more can you say?    Very VERY surreal moment...performing in front of someone who inspired me to be here. Did    someone say OH MY GOD???

So the next day was our end of tour party...even though we had two    more shows to do...where better to celebrate than NYC? It was in this place called Lot 61    in Chelsea...and we had a blast. It was actually very emotional and I think that is when    it really hit me that this was all coming to a close.

The next day we left for Cleveland...had a great show...and then    prepared for our last gig in Kentucky. All sorts of mad and weird stuff went on that day.    Last shows are traditionally weird anyway...as everyone feels kinda depressed but    exhausted and practical jokes are happening everywhere.

Some of the craziness?? Billie Myers appeared on stage during our    All Around Me routine on the shoulders of our road crew dressed in her best Scary Spice    outfit screaming SPICE UP YOUR LIFE. She then proceeded to spray us with Silly String    (that shaving cream gunk...) Very funny!! We almost couldn't do the song.

Members of our band were seen doing all sorts of weird things...like    kissing each other...wearing each other's costumes...and hamming it up. We managed to drag    every crew member on stage or under a spotlight during the band intro...and someone    painted the words WE'LL MISS YOU on the drum riser.

During the encore...we sang ONE OF US...and got a bit choked up as I    dedicated it to Chuck...our sound assistant who's Grandchild is going in for an operation    soon. I asked the crowd to say a prayer for him and that's when it really hit me that the    tour was over. Not just the tour either...but this album...this stage of our lives. Like    graduating from High School this felt like a real ending...and the beginning of a future    somewhere out there.

After the show...we all ended up on Billie's bus...disco dancing and    acting like complete morons. Had a blast.

I want to take this opportunity to say thank you to each and every    one of you...for giving us this incredible experience...for listening to the music...for    understanding it...for coming out in droves to see our circus when it came to your town.    This is a thank you to you...the fans of the music...and our colleagues...the Savage    Garden Band...and Crew...It has been the most humbling experience to have know you...I    feel like a better man for having been through this all with you.

This is a farewell of sorts...for a long time. We have to take some    much needed rest...get our thoughts together and try and remember what real life is about    for a little while. Before you know it...we will be in the studio...working on more magic.    Until then...we are going to go away until we have something thoughtful to say.

Thanks for the memories.    See you in THE FUTURE.....

Darren