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smute · 2 years

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im seeing a lot of posts about seasonal depression recommending vitamin d supplements and thats great and all but...

1. it's normal to feel a little gloomy in the winter. unless it affects your daily life, you dont have seasonal depression, you have the winter blues. if it does affect your daily life, please see a doctor. seasonal depression/SAD/MDD with seasonal pattern can be treated very effectively with antidepressants or light therapy (see below)

2. while there is a link between depression (particularly postpartum) and vitamin d deficiency, the effectiveness of vitamin d supplements as a treatment has not been conclusively proven.

3. even if you do suffer from seasonal depression, there's a good chance that your vitamin d levels are fine. if you regularly spend a decent amount of time outdoors during the summer months (mar-oct) when there is enough natural ultraviolet light available in latitudes like europe and north america for your body to synthesize its own vitamin d, you probably have enough stored in your fat cells to make it through the darker half of the year. if you live south of the 35th parallel you're making vitamin d year round.

supplements can't hurt (technically, excess levels of vitamin d can be toxic, but even with supplements you're unlikely to poison yourself) but, once again, my point is: even if you have a vitamin d deficiency, it's not necessarily connected to your seasonal depression, and even if there is a connection, it's not necessarily causal.

something super straightforward that is actually proven to work is light therapy, especially when its done early in the morning. it tackles a root cause (lack of daylight) and can help balance your circadian rhythm and your melatonin/serotonin production. it doesn't require a prescription (it's a lamp), you don't have to see a doctor in order to try it (it's a lamp), it's non-invasive (it's a lamp) and accessible (it's a lamp), and it has very few side effects (mostly stuff like eye strain or headaches since, again, it's a lamp). this is my second winter with a light therapy lamp and i have noticed a significant improvement not just in my overall mood but especially in my alertness and energy levels. so yeah. just putting that out there

#&#sorry about the rant im just a little annoyed by these posts #seasonal depression is not just feeling a little down in the dumps because its cold and wet outside.#its a serious condition and people being like oh yeah just pop a vitamin really piss me off #anyway: about the light therapy thing #the lamp/light box itself doesnt have to be expensive #just make sure that its actually meant to be used for light therapy #cause it has to be strong enough. most of them are like 10k lux #and you normally start with a 30 minute session every morning #or longer if that doesnt help #and make sure to read the manual! you have to be fairly close to the light source for it to be effective #if you sit 10 feet away from a 10k lux lamp or if you look the other way #your retinas wont be getting 10k lux #and thats where the light needs to go #its how your body knows when its time to stop turning serotonin into melatonin

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thetitans-stories · 9 months

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Catherine started her morning like every other morning. Wake up. Breakfast. Get ready for work. A proper attire today since her friend Ashley in R&D had texted her the day before that they were going to find a breakthrough that would change a lot. She was always cryptic like that. Not wanting to be late, she drove off to the large office building downtown where their research lab and office was located. As she drove, there was a strange sensation of wrongness about something, but she did not take too much stock in it. That is until she reached the office and walked up to the doors where the security guard greeted her.

A strong, muscled, green woman with tusks grunted at her as she approached. All Catherine wanted to do was scream in panic, but her body was on autopilot. Her mouth greeted the guard with ”Nice morning Kal-harch” as if everything was normal. Without any control over her body, she walked past the guard that slapped her exposed ass hard enough to leave a mark. Instead of being angry, her body responded with a giggle.

Going to the reception desk, Catherine almost feinted. Her very good friend Shara was gone. Or at least almost. The person sitting there had the nose and cheekbones of her. The rest was a stereotypical bimbo, vapid eyes and clearly not a thought in her brain. That did make the comically undersized shirt she was using as a breast container even more ironic. She did not even notice Catherine walk past and into the elevator. Catherine at this point was screaming inside her head, but her mouth only hummed along with the elevator song. Stepping out she walked into a office she did not recognize for one bit. Gone where desks and chairs. Instead, walking plastic people perfectly inserted themselves under people as they needed to sit, just in time for them to not fall over. As if the plastic people knew exactly where and when to be. People was also a stretch. Each creature more weird looking than the last one.

She spotted two coworkers that at least looked humanoid. As she went over to them, they said ”Hey C. Ashley wanted to meet you in room D. Something about an emergency.” And then something strange happened. Both of their breasts balloted outwards. Their clothes shifted to that of fetish versions of some movie C had heard of. Both of them instantly forgot about C and started making out like lesbian lovers that had not see each other for years. Her body did take to the instructions of moving towards the conference rooms. Walking past more debauchery, there was no longer a single female in the office that did not look like a fetish fantasy version of their former selves.

C stepped into the room and with all the blinds pulled it was dark, yet she could perfectly see the darkelf friend of hers from R&D. ”Oh thank Lolth you are here. Please tell me you are stil in there C.” Ashley said before moaning and rubbing her hands against her pussy. ”Ohmmmm. They did.... Something...ahhhhhh.” and then her friend came hard from just a short masturbation session. C was curious about this, and Catherine inside her tried to respond but with no control over her mouth, she instead knelt down and offered a tongue to help her friend out. It is what any good friend does. Catherine could feel the arousal building, she was trying to break through but nothing. After 30 minutes of lesbian action, Asharah finally calmed down enough to say ”You have not even seen yourself, have you?” C turned to look in the full body mirror every fuckroom had.

C only saw her normal green elf self, but Catherine almost feinted at the sight. A tiny thong, some kind of corset and bra, dark soulless eyes. Asharah said ”You have to believe me, R&D did something to change everything. It was our big thing. It was.....” And that was her last words as her elven form shrank, shifted and clanged to the floor as she was changed into a metallic slick vibrating dildo. C took up her best ”friend” in the office and quickly inserted into her pussy for some stimulation relief. Two men stepped into the room, one holding some kind of device. They spoke ina language utterly foreign to C and Catherine, yet Catherine could have sworn she understood it just this morning. The man pointed the device at her and pressed a button.

C fell back, head empty of thought. Nothing left inside, she was a company fuckdoll. The metal dildo vibrated itself out of her pussy, yet she could feel nothing. She was a toy to be played with. She no longer had any will to keep it inside her. One of them men pulled it fully out of her and tossed it onto the floor discarding it. C was then lifted up, her body limp and unresponsive. Carried away to wherever storage had existed. The emptiness was quickly filled in as whatever remained of Catherine vanished in an instant and something had to take up its place. For now an empty void existed that would fill up whenever someone requisitioned her for a fuck. She would be whatever and whoever they wanted her to be. C was her only designation. C did not worry about anything. Eyes blank, she did what others told her.

#mind control #transformation #slave #master #reality alteration #elf #cosplay #reality change #mindless

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silenced-ghost · 9 days

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good morning, Sir! i hope you’re okay and you’re less tired than yesterday 🥺

i was wondering if you had any task in mind that i can have for my bum training? i haven’t had anything in it besides a plug but i want to push my limits a little bit! i do have a dildo at home but you can pick anything else if you want.

also, i wanted to say that the last task you gave me was about body writing and i felt so good and icky having those words you requested on my body!!

- ☀️

good morning! thank you and sorry I'm a bit delayed in replying - it's been a busy week so far but I am sleeping normally and feeling more rested! I'm also so glad you enjoyed that previous task! body writing has felt like an unsung hero lately when good girls should stay labeled.

it feels like anal training is always on my mind so I'm happy to give a task. a plug is definitely a good start, you should practice with your dildo next since you have one. I want you to start by keeping your plug inserted for two hours so your little ass is nice and warmed up. while you've got the plug inserted, I want you to slap your pussy 10 times every 30 minutes, and practice gagging on your dildo. next, I want you to spend 30 minutes thrusting your ass with the plug to loosen and spread your hole even more. if you can manage the motion of both, I want you to then fuck your pussy with the dildo as you continue to thrust your ass with the plug for at least 15 minutes.

after this warm up your holes should be well gaped and your dildo nice and drippy with your juices. finally, I want you to practice taking your dildo in your ass. take it slow, inch by inch, I want you to focus on the feeling of your ass getting filled and split open and relish it, succumb to it, let it melt your brain down so that you get addicted to the feeling of having your little hole used and stretched wider than ever before. your goal is to bottom out with the dildo completely, taking it all in your tight ass. I don't want you to feel pressure to do this in one session since it might take several training sessions to get there, but I do want you to remember while you're training your ass that an older man could simply pin you down and force you to take it all in one swift thrust.

#anon #cnc fr33use #cnc k!nk #bd/sm kink #bd/sm blog #bd/sm daddy #cnc free use #rough cnc #attention wh0r3 #bd/sm brat #bd/sm breeding

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brienneoftarth1989 · 1 year

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Yes Captain part 4

Captain Phasma x fem reader

Previous / Next / Series

Summary: After your spicy session in Phasma’s room she starts to ignore you. You were worried that you had done something to upset her but she said she was just bored. You were angry and hurt.

Warnings: None

Requests open

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You awoke the next morning to a cold empty bed. You looked around hoping to see Phasma somewhere in her room but she was nowhere to be found. You looked at the time and it was only 8:30 in the morning.

She might have gone to work already and didn’t want to wake you up, you thought to yourself. That definitely had to be the case. You definitely didn’t want to intrude on Phasma's personal space so you just got dressed and headed back to your own room to get ready for the day ahead. You couldn’t wait until you gotta see her again.

It has been two weeks since you spoke to Phasma! Two whole weeks! You didn’t understand how you could go from spending two amazing days together to then not even speaking to one another. You thought you had done something to upset the captain and you were trying your hardest to find her around the ship but it was proving more difficult than you thought.

There was only so much you could do and until you found Phasma there was nothing you could do. So you did the only thing you could do and that was work and train. When you weren’t training you were busy doing your job which was one of the most enjoyable things you did. You were a mechanic and anytime the main ship or the aircrafts had a problem you were there to fix it.

The day started just like every other day so far this week. You got out of bed at the crack of dawn, got yourself dressed into some gym clothes and headed down to the gym. You had hoped to have bumped into Phasma down at the gym but you had no such luck.

You had a workout plan everyday of the week. Monday was chest and arms. Tuesday was shoulders and back. Wednesday was a cardio circuit. Thursday was strength day and Friday was legs. Saturday and Sunday were rest days but if you ended up in the gym then you just did whatever you felt like doing.

It was Wednesday today so you were going to do your cardio circuit. You started with 10 burpees followed by 10 push-ups. That was followed by 15 crunches and 20 squat thrusts. That was then followed by three sets of hanging leg raises and three one minute rounds of planks before finally ending with a 20 minute low intensity cardio on the treadmill.

Some days that was enough but when you had some extra energy you would repeat the first four activities a second time. Today was one of those days. The frustration that had built up was enough for you to repeat your circuit three whole times. However you knew that if you did that you would overwork yourself and be exhausted.

So you finished your workout in the gym before heading to the shower block to get yourself cleaned up and ready for the day. You got undressed and hopped into the shower closest to you. As you stepped in you realised it was the same shower cubicle that Phasma had fucked you in. You sighed to yourself as you felt the pain build inside of you.

As you were showering you heard the door to the shower block open. You felt the butterflies return to your body hoping that it was Phasma. Maybe she had seen you come in here and she wanted to have round two in the shower. You had a look over to where you could hear the person moving around. You were disappointed to see that it wasn’t Phasma and just one of your friends.

You sighed to yourself. Why is she doing this to you? You finished up your shower before getting ready and heading back to your room. Once back in your room you got changed into your work clothes before having a quick breakfast and heading off to work.

Once you arrived at your office you grabbed your work orders for the day and headed off to work on the aircrafts in order of urgency. You normally enjoyed working but today you just couldn’t seem to find the motivation. Everything seemed to be taking 10 times longer than it normally did. You knew exactly whose fault this was and you couldn’t even find her to confront her.

You did wonder if she was out on a mission but when you confronted one of your colleagues about her whereabouts they had told you that they had seen her everyday this week. That meant she was actively ignoring you and trying to avoid you.

While you were working on your final aircraft of the day you heard that familiar voice once again. You quickly snapped your head in the direction you had heard her voice. It was definitely her in her chrome armour. You didn’t care what you were supposed to be doing, you stood up immediately and chased after her as she was walking away.

“Captain!” You shouted hoping that she would hear you. No response but the pace she was walking seemed to pick up. She was trying to avoid you. “Please Captain, I need to have a quick word with you. It’s important” you said, trying your best to catch up. You watched as she rounded a corner.

You had to start running. Her tall legs and her fast pace made it impossible to walk quickly after her so running was the only option. As you ran round the corner she was gone. She must have sprinted away because there was no way she could have gone anywhere as it was a bare corridor.

All you could do was just stare down the empty corridor. How could she do this to you? Did you mean nothing to her? Were you just a quick fuck? You rested your back against the wall and slowly let your body slide down to the floor. You curled up into a ball and just started sobbing.

It was at that moment you decided you weren’t going to give a fuck anymore. You weren’t going to give her the satisfaction to her, chasing her down like you were desperate for her. There was no way you were going to sink that low. After your little cry you picked yourself up and went back to work continuing on with your day like everything was fine.

Another whole week went by of not seeing Phasma and you no longer cared. Well you did care but you weren’t going to show her how much it really was affecting you. Most evenings you would go back to your room and cry yourself to sleep. How could you be this stupid to have let her use you the way she did. Why did you even think she would’ve wanted something more to have come out of this?

You had decided that from now on you would just avoid Phasma as much as you could and so far it was going great. Any time you saw Phasma you did your utter best to end up walking in the opposite direction. However part of you did want to just confront Phasma and ask her what you did wrong to now deserve this kind of treatment.

It wasn’t until one afternoon you heard your name and a few others over the intercom asking you to meet with your Captain to go over your progress report from the mandatory training. Unfortunately you knew there was only so long you could go avoiding Phasma.

Everyone else who had been called were from a different unit which meant Phasma was free now and that she would be expecting you in her office. You sighed to yourself reluctantly pulling yourself from what you were doing and taking yourself to her office.

You made sure to take a long and slow walk to her office as you were in no rush to go and see her. If things hadn't taken such a drastic turn then you could’ve seen yourself practically running to her side but it was a shame it took so much of a drastic turn.

When you finally arrived outside her office doors you didn’t even want to knock. You could’ve just stood there forever and hoped that the ground would have swallowed you up. However, that never happened. You stood there for about 5 minutes waiting for something to happen but it never did.

You eventually decided that you should just get this over and done with so you took a deep breath and knocked loudly on her doors. “Come in” you heard her say from the other side of the door. You once again took a deep breath and entered her office.

There she was sitting down at her desk and she didn’t even have the decency to look up and make eye contact with you. You sat down in one of the chairs opposite her desk and waited for her to say something to you. You watched as she flipped through her paperwork before finally stopping assuming it’s yours.

She has a quick look over the paperwork before finally looking up and making eye contact with you. “Well this all looks to be in order and you did great with your training so you are free to go” she said sternly.

That was it? Could they have not just sent an email or something rather than for me to have to come down here and deal with this. “Phas…”

“It’s Captain” Phasma interrupted you. “Sorry. Captain, are you sure it’s just that? Is there not anything I need to work on? I’m not that good that there are no improvements for me to make” you stated. “Look I’m just following what’s on the paperwork. It says your scores are perfect. What more could you want? Your dismissed y/n. I’m sure you have more aircrafts to fix” she said quite harshly.

You stood up quickly and made your way to her door. Just as you were about to grab the handle of the door you felt this force stop you. You turned around and looked at Phasma who was now looking back down at her paperwork. “Just answer me one question,” you said to Phasma.

“Yeah and what is that?” She asked as she looked up at you once again. “Did I do something to upset or offend you? You have spoken to me since that night in your bedroom. I really want to fix whatever happened” you said as you walked closer to Phasma.

“Well there is nothing to fix” she said to you blankly. “What do you mean?” You asked her. “I was bored and wanted to fuck someone. I thought you were down” she said to you not really giving one single fuck. You wanted the ground to just swallow you up and take you somewhere far away.

How could you have been so stupid? “A quick fuck. That was all I was to you. If I knew that was all you wanted then I wouldn’t have fucked you at all Captain Phasma!” You practically yelled at her. You didn’t care what she had to say anymore. She had told you all you needed to know. You meant absolutely nothing to her.

You grabbed the door handle and stormed out to your bedroom. You never wanted to see that woman again. You knew it was way to good to be true. That night you spent the whole night crying to yourself. You had never felt so many emotions at once.

You were angry and hurt and the only thing you wanted to do was cry and sleep and that was basically what you did for the next couple of weeks never once leaving your quarters for anything.

#gwendoline christie #gwendolineuniverse #fanfics #captain phasma #captain phasma x reader #phasma x reader #star wars #stormtrooper #fwb to lovers #used for sex #betrayal #hurtful #hurt/angst #anger #yes captain series #yes captain #brienneoftarth1989

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taz-ma-raz-skylar · 9 months

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Credits to Taz on Patreon.

HOW MUCH I TRAIN EVERY WEEK? (Honestly).

Let me preface this with a fair warning that I’m a bit of a psycho when it comes to training… For me it’s gone past the point of fitness at this point. It’s about challenging myself and keeping something consistent in my life within a world full of inconsistency.

It’s a space to think, to process, to plan and to humble.

So in answer to how much I train every week, the reality is every day. 7 days a week. Sometimes twice a day. I don’t plan rest days… I only plan for some days to be less intense than others.

For example if I’ve had a double training session on Monday, then Tuesday I might do a long swim and then stretch on Tuesday.

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A normal day if I’m not shooting a film or TV show is:

Morning - Wake up at 8am.

Run/Cycle/Swim for 1 hour.

Then Pilates or Core work on an app for 10-20 minutes.

Then stretch for 10-30 minutes.

Then I WRITE for 6-8 hours...

Evening (Not every day).

Martial arts for (1 to 2 hours). Taekwondo, pad work with my friends, Kickboxing or Jiujitsu.

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A normal day if I am filming something:

Wake up 4am.

Bike/Run/Swim 45 minutes at 4:30am.

In the car, ready for work by 5:45am.

Then at work, I’ll find breaks in the day to get in 10/20 minutes of stretching and 10/20 minutes of pilates.

Then in the evening I’ll go for a nice walk and stretch.

In bed by 8/9pm most days.

My routine varies a lot depending on where I am in the world, what I’m training for, how much time I have and what I have access to, but generally the rule I have is MOVE to start the day and MOVE again to end the day.

The things that are consistent throughout the year are Running, Swiming and Kickboxing/Taekwondo and stretching.

The things that vary depending on access are: Cycling, Hiking, Surfing, Climbing, Jiujitsu, Yin Yoga, etc…

If there’s one thing I want you to take away from my opening gambit, it’s JUST MOVE(: & it’s not that deep - so don’t dread it, just do it. Don’t build it up to be some big thing in your head.

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#tazbeingtaz

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lgcmaylin · 2 months

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𝕻𝖗𝖊𝖈𝖎𝖔𝖚𝖘. Wordcount: 726 Gif credit ©

✗ A Day in the Life of Maylin.

this was a new challenge for maylin. documenting her life in one day seemed like a lot to think about, and what she can and can't showcase during her filming. though the brunette decided not to overthink it too much, whatever the editors wanted to cut, they could do so without maylin feeling bad about their decision.

6:00 am.

this was when maylin woke up almost every day, the sound of her alarm gently playing in the background as she had already gotten up to set up this camera to catch her waking up. it was clear that while she woke up super early, the trainee wasn't a morning person at all. she sat in her bed for another five minutes, simply sitting and staring into space before getting up to do her daily morning routine. this consisted of flossing, brushing her teeth, washing her face, and putting out very minimal skincare alongside her regular amount of makeup. all of this was done in silence, there were no words to truly be said so early in the morning yet.

moving on to preparing her breakfast, this is when maylin began to speak in a whisper, not wanting to fully wake up the other girls in the dorm. "I'm not having anything special… just some leftover rice, kimchi, and the stew I made last night," she spoke while getting her food together, even making a snack for herself later that had yogurt, granola, and fruits in a container that was placed back in the fridge.

7:00 am.

by now, maylin is seen making her way to the company.

she expressed while walking that she likes to get to the studios earlier, just to squeeze in some alone time to stretch and truly get her mindset prepared for a full day of training. "in the midst of it all, the company is preparing for another family concert." she started, entering the studio's and placing the camera down so she could talk and stretch at the same time. "this would be my fourth… fifth, concert preparation and each year it gets even more exciting than the last." and one of the only times she could fully perform on stage with a crowd. the thought of doing this every year pushed maylin harder to achieve her goal of debuting.

when training began, and not giving much away from the practice session, maylin didn't want to record too much and take her focus away from learning - but she did record a good portion of her dance practice with the other trainees.

Lunchtime.

while maylin liked to eat alone, she met up with a close friend of hers for lunch, taeha. deciding to eat outside of the company that day, the girls went to a cafe close by. they spent the time they had eating and chatting with one another, catching up on the things they missed during their phone calls. maylin could be seen laughing along with her friend, sharing photos and even small ghost stories that she learned during the week.

6:00 pm.

maylin was now home, eating bibimbap that she picked up on her way back to the dorms. she sat at a desk in the corner of the room, her glasses on as she had placed the camera in front of her. "this is normally how my life is outside of school. if I was back in that routine, you guys would probably see me bouncing around a bit more from the college lifestyle to being a trainee at night." and how she juggle it all, along with her other hobbies? maylin doesn't know. she continued to chat with the camera about how excited she was to learn a new routine and dance with the other girls. she is the happiest performing, and dancing, of course. there would be a small twinkle in her eyes as she spoke.

8:30 pm.

her hair was visibly damp from her shower, now doing her skincare once more before letting her hair air dry as she went back to bed. this time, she turned on a small reading lamp that she installed on her bed. she was journaling in the dark, then reading a book before growing tired. her video ended here, of the young woman indulging in a fantasy book that would keep her up all night if she allowed it to.

#i just knew these gifs would come in handy one day #anyway this is truly maylin in a nutshell... i hope some kind of charm came from it all #lgc:traineemission #𝕾𝖔𝖑𝖔 * . ⊹ 𝐵𝑅𝐴𝑉𝐸𝑅 𝑇𝐻𝐴𝑁 𝑌𝑂𝑈 𝑇𝐻𝐼𝑁𝐾

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crmsnmth-journal · 6 months

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3/13/2024 10:42 PM

I've been watching Freaks and Geeks (for probably the 100th time) and I never realized that Ann Perkins (Rashida Jones) is in it. I just spent a good while trying to figure out why I recognized her so much. And when I figured it out, I did the only thing a person can do. I pointed at the TV and said in my best Chris Trager impression, "Ann Perkins." And then I proceeded to laugh to myself at my stupid little joke. I am my biggest fan and my worst heckler.

I had probation this morning, which meant my day started at 8:00 AM. It was supposed to start at 6 but I managed to turn every alarm completely off. My ride picked me up at 8:30. I had just enough time to feed the outside cats, my cat, take a five-minute shower and leave. A half-pot of coffee sat looking so delicious, but I stopped taking coffee cups out of the house. I tend to leave them in random places.

Probation went smooth, as always. I always get that weird feeling though that I've done something wrong. Every time. After my hour with the PO group, I just headed up to the alley. It's not like there's really anything better to do in this dying little town. It really makes me wonder if maybe, once I'm off paper, I move somewhere. Not for someone like I did Milwaukee or Manitowoc, but for me. The last placed I moved to for me was Oconomowoc and that turned out to be one of the best decisions I ever made. This town is going to last long, and anyone here can see it. When a house or two is for sale on every single street, that's not a good sign.

Work was unusually dead. I decided to step away from my normal Spotify playlist, and actually went way to back to my old YouTube playlist (back when I was too cheap to pay for any kind of streaming services. I'm not going back to that though.) A lot of my YouTube list was made in very late nights, when i would smoke a lot of weed, which means there is some very very weird shit on there. There are tons of bands that only had a few songs available when I stumbled across them (like Bat Country. The songs Bathroom Floor and Porcelain Lions are beautiful, and can be found pretty easily, check the Fistful of Vinyl sessions.) or really odd mashups. Rick Astley and Nirvana work far better than they should. And then there's they straight up weird (My Hands Are Bananas). It drives Sherry nuts some of the off the wall music I'll sing along too. Every once in a while, one will catch her. Tonight, she heard Annoying's Wishing Well (which is such a hauntingly beautiful tune) and by the end she was asking who it was. Also, Meatwad singing Chicken and Beans will make me laugh every single time I hear it.

Tomorrow is my dad's birthday. This is the first one since he died in January. I'm going to call my stepmom tomorrow and make sure she's doing well. I tried texting her for her birthday, but I didn't get a reply. Of course, I texted her a day or two late. I'm bummed about it. I'm sure most people would be too. But it's kind of weird to me. I mean, he never made it a big deal well he was alive. Most years we just let it pass by. Birthdays have never been a real big thing for our family, at least for the adults. We always joke that once you pass 21 there is nothing left to celebrate. I guess that joke kind of became real. Knowing that, I wonder why it feels so important tomorrow. Why it matters. I can't quite figure it out, and it's kind of eating at me a little bit. Just enough to pique my curiosity. I miss him. He would've been 57.

#journal #my blog #blog #life #my journal #my stuff #my post #my writing #personal #personal blog #slice of life #writing #nonfiction #inner thoughts #personal thoughts

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deepdrearn · 2 years

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Long Covid & Recovery

I got an ask on something I wrote on long covid and I realized I had A Lot to say about it. So I wrap it in a long post here, who knows someday to someone else’s benefit.

I got covid for the first time in April. I coughed, was tired and experienced shortness of breath. But no fever, so (in typical Dutch fashion) I figured it wasn’t that bad. Yeah ok, it took me two hours to do my morning routine and then I had to recover, but apart from feeling like I was training for a marathon, nothing wrong. It took me a few weeks before I noticed that my fatigue was getting worse every day. Oops.

Right before before I had covid, I casually biked 100km in weekends, untrained. After, I could not even do 10 minutes. The majority of my recovery has happened in about six months. At this point I am still not 100% there but I am good enough to work on my graduation thesis again and start training for a winter triathlon in March.

What follows now is a summary of my lessons learned:

1) Brain recovery takes longer than fitness. Although at first, the brain recovery was much aligned with the body recovery, eventually the brain recovery went slower. I have read that this is because as soon as you are able to move your body more, your brain gets more stimuli: in other words it is much more overloaded quickly than your body. So that’s normal and it happens a lot!

2) Professional help helps. I was lucky enough to get this relatively late into the pandemic, so programmes for long covid patients were already in place. I was also lucky enough that my GP immediately send me to a post-covid recovery programme where I got a physical therapist. She helped me find the right pace of recovery, as I had a very hard time accepting that 10 minutes of biking, or 30 minutes of emailing was my limit. She would tell me again and again not to push it, for it would set me back even more.

3) Rest is a skill. In the first months, I lied down every 2 hours to make sure I'd take enough rest. When going somewhere I'd take the car so I could nap in the car. I rested.

4) Checking in with the body is a skill. I never did it before. I was the king of Pushing Through. Pushing through a marathon, tendonitis, sleep deprivation, exams. I had made it my skill. But now I had a body with such fragile limits, that got worse with every push. I had to learn to really check in and feel my body. To do so, I meditated daily. Sometimes more than an hour per day (in sessions of 20 minutes). I am so glad I learned this and I still check in.

5) There is no quick fix for long covid. My physical therapist had told me that with their programme, most peoples recovery really starts somewhere between 3-6 month. After 3 months the first improvements started, and writing emails did no longer take two hours. But well, most of the things I did were still a mess and I had a really hard time keeping an overview. I had no idea who I told about it or not, so I probably told some people many times how messy I was, and forgot to update others.

6) I got my booster vaccination two months ago and that was a big push for my recovery. At that point I was doing ok. I was studying again, but I needed all weekend to recover from that. After the booster, it felt like a big setback. After 10 days, however, I started feeling ‘normal’ for the first time since April. I am not a scientific study and I lack the medical lingo to look for studies but I’m pretty sure it helped me. A Lot.

#long covid #long hauler #the covid chronicles #post covid recovery #post covid syndrome

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thedreadvampy · 1 year

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Hello Davide said you know about getting big arms do u have advice

I mean I think he's being pretty generous about my singular muscle and also tbh my experience may not be replicable but I'll tell you about these WIP gains

first off the main thing is I got a personal trainer. and this is why I don't know how replicable it is bc she's just amazing, she specialises in disabled and queer clients who might not feel comfortable at the gym AND she charges £50 a month, and both those things are fairly hard to find I suspect.

So I have been seeing her once a fortnight since October with a focus on weightlifting - we do a bit with machines but mostly we're doing stuff with free weights (kettlebells, dumbbells etc). Just now we're kind of building up basic strength and form with the intention of constantly increasing weights (we've started doing bench press now which is VERY exciting and makes me feel VERY strong)

Cause that's only once a fortnight, sometimes less, I also started doing wee morning workouts every day to keep moving between sessions (cause I can't go to the gym on my own or I will die) and I honestly think that's what's made the most difference. I was just doing 5-10 minutes of body work but then my partner got me some dumbbells for my birthday so now I'm doing weights too and it's gone up to about 15 minutes a day, first thing, like I do it in my jammies before I get up. So right now it looks like:

14 webslingers (from a plank, bring one foot up and swing your arm around behind you like you're Spiderman)

20 dead bugs (lie on your back with your arms and legs in the air and lower one arm and one leg until your core kicks in)

14 glute bridges (hip thrusting to the sky)

14 one-armed chest presses, alternating hands (6kg in each hand now! I started on 3kg)

14 normal chest presses (again, 6kg in each hand atm)

30 seconds elevated planks (I was doing normal planks for a minute, but it hurts my bunions 😭 so now I kick my feet up onto the bed with my hands on the floor. but that makes it WAY harder so I can only do half as long)

14 squats or 10-14 thrusters depending on how I'm feeling (squats with or without weights, thrusters are like squats but with a weight in each hand and as you come up you use the momentum to lift the weights above your head. I'm also at 6kg per hand here, so squatting 12kg total - because it's a faff to change weights I have just been doing my whole workout with the same weight. so like, I can definitely do more than 6kg chest press, I'm doing 9-10kg at the gym, but I can't do more than 6kg for thrusters atm so we're stuck at 6kg for both)

for me because of the flavour of brain I have, it's about habit forming, so once I committed to doing the same workout every morning it was pretty easy to absorb into my routine. YMMV though bc I'm aware this is a personal weirdness. I haven't missed more than 3 morning workouts a month since October purely because I know that once I start letting it be optional I won't do it at all, but I have found it really helps me wake up too. If I'm at someone else's house and don't have weights or the little handle things I have that make planking not hurt my wrists, I pick and choose and do the stuff I can.

but yeah my main advice is: everything I have achieved so far is purely down to finding a really good trainer, cause I wouldn't know where to start otherwise. The morning workout first came out of the regular warmup exercises she had us doing (webslingers, dead bugs, squats) and I've been just adding stuff we do at the gym in month on month as I get confident enough to do them on my own. especially as a guy with bad joint, I definitely have tried doing home weight exercises off my own back in the past and just not been able to consistently do anything without hurting myself, so Huld really has been invaluable in that.

but yeah other than that doing the daily stuff has really helped. my gym progress and confidence is a Lot Accelerated. on the other hand my partner hasn't to my knowledge been doing that kind of daily routine and he's also definitely bulked up, but he's a bit more prone to musculature anyway (and him having softer arms is a recent thing cause he's done a lot of heavy-lifting jobs, whereas I'm learning to lift properly for the first time)

#red said

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5sosxqueen · 2 years

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Ashton Sick From Stress

~Part 1~ , Part 2 >

What is this? 😅 Sometimes, I wonder what was going through my mind while I was writing these stories back then.

Warnings: Minor depictions of illness, migraines

Written in 2018

Published (Wattpad) - Jan 29, 2018

Word Count: 1511

Updates are every Tuesday and Thursday

Also Available on Wattpad and AO3!!!

Part 1:

Ashton's POV:

For the past couple of months of our tour we have been busy almost nonstop. We have had constant meetings, signings, sound checks, rehearsals, recording sessions, interviews, anything you name we've had to do in the past 2 months. Our band is seriously exhausted. We are all stressed to the max. So when I woke up this morning to achy muscles I wasn't too surprised, as we had a concert last night, but even still I don't normally get this achy and stiff from a concert. Practically all of my muscles were really tight and stiff.

We have a couple days off and we are at a hotel for a week so, thankfully, I can rest. I was brought out of my thoughts when Calum said "Hey guys I'm going to head down to the gym. Anyone care to join me?" After he said that my mind instantly was in a warm, bubbly, Jacuzzi that was waiting for me downstairs.

"I'll go! I need a bit of exercise once in a while." Michael said jumping off the couch in our room.

"Same here. I'll meet you guys there." Luke had just gotten up so he wanted to eat something and brush his teeth.

"Ash?" Michael's voice bringing me out of my happy trance.

"Huh? Oh sorry. I think I'm going to relax in the jacuzzi for a bit... I'm really achy from last night." Of course they didn't think anything of it since being the drummer is the most strenuous job in the band. At least that's how I often feel, this being one of those times.

Michael and Calum went ahead while I got my swim trunks on and grabbed my water bottle, and a towel. This hotel was really nice the swimming pool and jacuzzi are inside, so I didn't have to worry about sunglasses or sunscreen. The only downside of this hotel is that there are no elevators, that we have seen anyways. It only has two floor though so it's not so bad. I started the climb dome the stairs and I noticed not even a full flight down I became very short winded. Again odd, but nothing serious... Hopefully. If I ended up needing, anything the guys are just a 10 step walk from the jacuzzi so I wouldn't have had very far to go.

By the time I reached it I felt strangely exhausted. A little relaxing did me good though. All of the achy and tense muscles I had we're gone, thankfully and I had only spent a total of 20 minutes in there.

When I got out I looked in the weight room and noticed that Luke joined Cal and Michael at some point. Although I felt a bit better, I started to notice some pain in my chest and with the breathing problem I was experiencing 30 minutes prior, I didn't want to risk walking back to our hotel room alone. I was starting to also get quite shaky and a tad wobbly on my feet. 'Ya I need help...' "Michael... C-can you help me g-get back to the r-room?" 'That's odd why am I stuttering?' I questioned myself. I wasn't expecting that at all. I knew I was shaking.

"Uh, sure. Are you alright Ashton? I did notice the stuttering- Whoa!" I suddenly fell and felt arms around me. "Ya... I'll take that as a no... Of course I'll help you out buddy. You need to lay down anyways, by the looks of it." Michael quickly picked me up and went up the status back into our room. He wasted no time in laying me down onto one of the beds. "So what's going on exactly? I know you mentioned something earlier about being sore. Do you think you are getting sick?" Michael kind of rambled.

"I'm not sure. Probably... If I'm being honest, the Jacuzzi did help the aches and tightness in my muscles, but as soon as I got out I noticed I was shaky and having some chest pains." I watched as pure terror etched it way onto Michael's face.

"Ashton.... Anything else?" He asked.

"I was having shortness of breath when I was going down the stairs. That was one of the reasons I wanted your help." I addmited, only succeeding in making his worry skyrocket all the more. "... And I'm starting to get a fucking headache on top of everything... Fucking hell man." I exclaimed suddenly forcing myself into a sitting position with a hand on my head.

"Ashton, I really don't like these symptoms... Maybe we should take you to a doctor." He started to pull out his phone to call the others and let them know what's going on, but I stopped him.

"No! I'm going to try taking a nap and we will see how I feel when I wake up. If I am any worse we will go." He agreed to the plan. "Could you, maybe, make me something small to eat? That could be adding onto, or even causing all of this."

"Sure. I'll also bring back some meds for you. I don't fully know what to give you though." He said, somewhat sadly.

"Just get me something for my head. I'm not feeling sick or anything so it shouldn't be the flu." He nodded and felt my forehead to see if there was any warmth. I quickly reminded him that I was just in a hot Jacuzzi and that could really alter a body temp.

"That's true... Now I will be back. Try not to fall asleep just yet Ash." I nodded tiredly. Even sitting up and leaning against the headboard my eyes felt really heavy. I was fighting to stay awake.

Michael's POV:

'I am really worried about Ash. Chest pains aren't something to fuck around with and he should know that. He asked me to leave it alone for now and I will try my best.' There were plenty of times that I found myself contemplating calling Luke and Calum, but I ultimately decided against it. I finished putting together some Bacon and eggs in the kitchenette we had and swiftly brought over to Ash. "Oh Ash.." I muttered under my breath upon noticing his long deep breaths. He fell asleep. I set the plate of food down and gently shook his shoulder. "Ash I have some food for you bud." I watched his eyes open and he winded and grabbed his head. "Sorry. Do you have a migraine now?" He nodded, a tear falling from his hazel eyes. I wiped it away and closed the curtains, before grabbing a couple of my Excedrin migraine meds. "Here Ash. You were only asleep for 20 minutes. I'm shocked you have a migraine now." I whispered so I wouldn't hurt his head again.

"Ya, me too." Wincing at even his own voice.

"Will you be ok alone while I go downstairs to let the others know what's going on?" He nodded as he took the plate of food in his hands and began to eat. "Ok I'll be back." I said before turning and walking out of the room. I practically ran down the stairs and into the weight room. "Guys Ash isn't feeling too well."

"What do you mean? What's going on with him?" Luke asked quickly concerned for his band mate.

"Ya what's going on Michael. Is he ok?" Calum questioned.

"Define ok... Ha sorry. When he came in here and got me earlier he ended up falling over. I just managed to catch him, luckily, but he told me that he was having chest pains and shortness of breath, along with the muscle aches from earlier. He had developed a headache and after sleeping for about 20 minutes, it was a migraine. He's eating right now so that's a plus I suppose, but I'm still really worried about him. I tried to get him to agree to go to the doctor, but he denied and said that if, after a nap, he isn't feeling better he will go." I unknowingly rambled on.

"It could be from stress. We've all had so much on our plate the past couple months, I'm honestly surprised none of us had gotten sick sooner." Luke said. That made a lot of sense. I hadn't thought of that. "But even still, I agree that we should take him to the doctors."

"So do I. Even if it is just stress, it seems pretty serious, but we will have to wait it out for now and let him sleep. If he thinks it'll help that's in him." Calum stated.

We all decided to head back to the room. I waited while they grabbed there stuff from the lockers. Once they came out we headed back to the room. I looked to the bad and noticed that Ash had finished his food and fell asleep.

We all sat down on the couch and watch football on low volume. We chatted amongst ourselves for a while until we heard it...

#5sos #5 seconds of summer #luke hemmings #michael clifford #ashton irwin #emeto #calum 5sos #vomit sickfics #ashton 5sos #michael 5sos #calum hood

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aakhyakashyap · 2 days

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The Power of Consistency: Achieving Your Fitness Goals

Fitness goals are often easier to set than to achieve. We start with excitement and enthusiasm, but over time, our motivation can dip. The secret to overcoming this is consistency. It might sound simple, but staying consistent is the key that unlocks success in any fitness journey. Whether you want to lose weight, build muscle, or improve your overall health, consistency will get you there. Let’s explore why consistency matters and how to make it work for you.

Why Consistency Matters

Imagine planting a seed and watering it just once, then expecting it to grow into a tree. It sounds ridiculous, right? The same principle applies to fitness. One intense workout or one healthy meal won’t change your body overnight. It’s the repeated actions, done over time, that make the difference.

Here’s why consistency is so powerful:

Build Habits: When you exercise regularly or eat healthy meals daily, these actions become habits. Once a habit is formed, it feels natural to continue. You won’t have to rely on willpower alone because your brain starts to expect and crave that positive behavior.

Steady Progress: Consistency leads to gradual, sustainable progress. Small improvements, day by day, accumulate into significant changes over time. It’s like saving money – a little saved regularly adds up to a big sum.

Prevents Burnout: Trying to do too much at once, like exercising for hours every day or following extreme diets, often leads to burnout. A consistent, balanced approach is less likely to leave you feeling exhausted or overwhelmed.

Boosts Confidence: Each small win builds confidence. As you notice the changes in your body or energy levels, you’ll feel motivated to keep going.

How to Stay Consistent

Now that we know why consistency is important, the next question is how to stay consistent, especially when life gets busy or motivation dips. Here are some practical tips:

Set Realistic Goals

It’s great to aim high, but setting overly ambitious goals can lead to frustration if you don’t see quick results. Break your big goal into smaller, more achievable steps. For example, instead of saying, “I want to lose 30 pounds,” focus on losing 1-2 pounds a week. These smaller milestones are easier to track and celebrate.

Create a Routine

Having a routine makes it easier to stay consistent. Choose specific days and times for your workouts, and treat them like any other important appointment. If mornings are hectic, try fitting in an evening workout or a lunchtime walk. Once exercise becomes part of your daily schedule, it’s harder to skip.

Mix It Up

Doing the same workout every day can get boring, which can lead to skipping sessions. Keep things exciting by varying your routine. Try different types of exercises like yoga, strength training, running, or cycling. This not only keeps you interested but also works different muscles, leading to better overall fitness.

Start Small

It’s tempting to dive in headfirst, but that often leads to burnout. Start with manageable goals, such as working out for 20-30 minutes a day, three times a week. As you get stronger, you can increase the duration and intensity of your workouts. Remember, doing something is always better than doing nothing.

Find Accountability

It’s easier to stay on track when someone else is rooting for you. Find a workout buddy, join a fitness class, or sign up for a local sports league. Even sharing your goals with a friend or family member can give you that extra push to stay consistent.

If you prefer solo workouts, consider using a fitness app that tracks your progress. Seeing your efforts add up over time can be very motivating.

Don’t Be Too Hard on Yourself

Life happens. There will be days when you miss a workout or indulge in a treat. What’s important is that you don’t let one slip-up derail your progress. Get back on track the next day, and keep going. Fitness is a long-term journey, and it’s normal to have ups and downs along the way.

Track Your Progress

Keeping a fitness journal or using an app to track your workouts and meals can help you stay consistent. When you see how far you’ve come, it’s easier to stay motivated. Celebrate your small victories – whether it’s lifting a heavier weight, running a longer distance, or simply feeling more energized.

Overcoming Challenges to Consistency

Even with the best intentions, life can sometimes get in the way. Here are a few common challenges and how to overcome them:

Lack of Time: If you’re pressed for time, shorten your workout but increase the intensity. A 20-minute high-intensity interval training (HIIT) session can be just as effective as a longer workout.

Boredom: If you’re getting bored, try a new workout class, change your running route, or invest in some new equipment to spice things up.

No Immediate Results: It can be discouraging if you don’t see results right away. Remember that fitness is a marathon, not a sprint. Stick with it, and you’ll see the payoff in time.

Low Motivation: When motivation is low, remind yourself of why you started. Reflect on how good you feel after a workout, or reward yourself with something small after sticking to your routine for a week or month.

Conclusion

Achieving your fitness goals isn’t about perfection – it’s about persistence. By staying consistent with your workouts, nutrition, and self-care, you’ll build momentum and create lasting change. Remember that small steps, taken consistently, lead to big results. Stick with it, and you’ll be amazed at what you can accomplish over time.

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microdosingwithjoe · 1 year

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For the Lazy:

HOW TO START MICRODOSING IN LESS THAN 48 HOURS

This post is for the “IDGAF” of how or why microdosing works. I’m hoping someone will try it because the basic process is so easy.

First, you have to reset your endocannabinoid system (ECS). This sensitizes your body to THC again. For those of you who are overdosing A LOT, your habitual use makes this the hardest part, because you have to go cold turkey for 36 whole hours. Honestly, the cessation of weed is as physically arduous as not drinking morning coffee. Studies show that after 36 hours, your body has expelled the THC you’ve consumed, regardless of how much.

The first time you get high after those 36 hours off THC is the most important because you are going to explore what your body wants to get the effects that you desire, whether it’s the perfect high or the perfect pain relief. You’re learning a new way to get high; what you’ve been doing with weed is the equivalent of chugging beers.

To do this, you should set aside some serious “me time” for several days in a row. That’s because observing the effects of weed is very important.

Most of us were conditioned to “smoking a joint” or “smoking a bowl,” but we’re overdosing ourselves by doing that because we aren’t appreciating the way the first hit is affecting us because we’re already taking another 4 or 5 hits off that joint before the first hit has fully taken effect.

Here’s how your first microdosing session for smokers should go (edibles listed below.) Turn off the TV and put away your phone. Find a comfortable spot. Get your selected weed and look at it and smell it. Whether you like the strain or not, keeping track of as many of its properties as you can; it will enhance your future experiences.

Preferably use a pipe or a bong. Break off a piece from the bottom of a bud, about the size of a pea. Crush it up into the pipe bowl and light it from the edge (this allows the weed to burn across the bowl, releasing flavors as it burns,) and try not to just roast the whole surface. Make sure you get a good, solid hit, but not so much you cough and ruin the experience. Beginners? Coughing is hard to avoid. There’s no substitute for experience in this case.

Don’t hold the hit in more than 2 seconds, but instead slowly exhale about half the smoke through your mouth and nose, then inhale a quick but small breath to stir the remaining smoke, then slowly exhale the remainder of the smoke immediately, again through both mouth and nose.

Take a mental note, or better yet, keep a journal of what you taste and smell, and eventually what you feel. Use terms that mean something to you, so you know what you mean, not what you think an expert would say: this is all about you.

Now for the hard part: wait. Over the next 15 (minimum) to 30 minutes.

During these essential moments, you’re observing the high, which should peak between 15 to 30 minutes, and its vital that you don’t take a second hit until the first one has peaked.

Most people are amazed at how high they get, but if you’re not high enough, you can clean out your pipe and repeat the same process for your second hit, and so on.

Here’s another tough part: “realistically, am I high enough, or not?” This is when honesty battles with our tendencies for gluttony and hedonism. It’s not easy; you’re changing the way you’ve always smoked pot, hopefully forever.

Seriously, if you feel a need to get blasted out of your gourd every time you get high, you probably have an untreated underlying issues or conditions that may require professional attention.

Weed is great for normal stress and needed pain relief, but it’s not (for example) treating severe PTST by itself. I know personally that cannabis can really help many PTSD cases. My dog was run over by a car in front of me, and I had flashbacks of that that would repeat over and over, like a 3-second TikTok horror video. Weed fixed that for me, but I knew exactly what to do and what strains would be effective. If you’re constantly trying to escape, please consider counseling.

Microdosing does wonders for normal stress, but it doesn’t fix real issues you need to talk about with your therapist or doctor.

On a clean ECS, most people will stop at 1-3 hits. I highly recommend using this process every time. I’ve been microdosing for about seven years now, and I still start with just one hit, like I did just a couple of hours ago. I’m still noticeably high, and I’m really glad that’s all it takes. It has allowed me to create an incredible stash for pennies a day, a fraction of what a single can of beer costs. I have around 30 strains and 5-6 concentrates, and most of them are more than 3 months old. Pot lasts around a year without significant degradation.

Each strain I buy enhances my experience possibilities because the more I acquire, the more tailored the high I get. This process of observing your high is what microdosing is all about: getting the right weed for the right moment, in JUST the right amount. I hope you come to enjoy the process as much as I do.

Are you ready for the best highs of your life? Isn’t 36 measly hours worth it? Go for it!

Microdosing with edibles is a pain in the ass to start, but well worth it.

Eating to get high means every time is different because what you’ve eaten and how much you’ve eaten can affect when the THC will take effect.

Microdosing edibles is a less Zen-like experience because taste and smell are wholly eliminated from the process because all you’ll taste and smell are flavorings.

It’s harder and takes longer to find your dose on edibles, because you can only increase doses in 6-hour increments, so the process can take days to finish.

I recommend getting 5mg gummy bears for this process. Start with just 1. If you didn’t reach your goal after 6 hours, take 2, and so on. Eventually you’ll find your spot, usually between 5 and 30mg.

Since each try takes 6 hours, establishing your dose can take from 1 to 3 days, more, if you’re THC resistant. Hopefully, you can do it on 5-10mg, and you’ll enjoy substantial economic benefits, being a ‘cheap drunk,’ only with weed.

I wish you luck and hope you commit yourself to follow through no matter what path you use. Microdosing is the way we are all supposed to get high.

#HowToGetHigh

#howtogethigh #microdosing #recreational cannabis #medical cannabis #cannabis #cannacommunity

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bladderrelief911reviews · 1 year

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Bladder Relief 911 Reviews– An Honest Review

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