#and you get to fucking meet angel dust’s va like i would die
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NO FAIRRRRR LUCKYYYYY YOU GET TO MEET ALL THESE COOL PEOPLE 💔💔💔
have fun though i am very happy for you girlie
guys my helluverse va lineup (at cons) this year consists of:
may (this friday!!!!!):
blake roman (angel)
amir talai (alastor)
erika henningsen (charlie)
july:
brandon rogers (blitzø)
erica lindbeck (loona)
and in the con in july im also meeting catra’s va (for anyone who likes she-ra because im madly in love with catra she’s my favorite character.)
BYE IM SO EXCITED WTF
#aj michalka was also in steven universe so my brain is going feral at thag#and erika henningsen is a BROADWAY STAR she was cady in mean girls you’re meeting a broadway star!!#and and loona’s va is also emira in the owl house!!#and and and brandon rogers is just a fuckinf legend so like#and you get to fucking meet angel dust’s va like i would die#and you get to meet alastor’s va like i’m just so so happy for you girl!!!
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I saw the Floyd request and I thought of rook hunt in hasbin hotel.
Rip Alastor his privacy he now became the hunted the both speaking French .
Imagine rook talking about angel dust his inner beauty is making him feel loved every day saying something positive.
And Charlie and vaggie getting put on romantic dates by rook and lucifer and rook seeing them ta about how beautiful love is.
Gender : GN
Pronouns : no real pronouns used(sometimes they/them)
Character : Alastor, general headcanon
Message from Raccoon : I was also thinking of a rook!reader while writing the Floyd!Reader tbh.
TW : ROOK!READER, a little suggestive
The Demon Of Hunt, a very strong overlord who knows everything about everyone. A predator whose prey are doomed to die.
They aren't a demon you want to mess with, you don't want to be their prey.
In their lifetime a very famous hunter living in a small village, in their death The Demon Of Hunt, the hunter everyone is afraid of.
Alastor
He met you when he was still killing overlords.
“Now, isn’t that a rather crude way of killing ?” You asked behind him.
How long have you been behind Alastor ? He has no idea.
“Oh ! And what a beautiful deer tail you have there ! C'est magnifique !” You say, touching Alastor's deer tail; ignoring the fact that you had just seen him kill an overlord.
He straight up hated you.
But he also found you interesting, especially when you could see through all his attacks.
Boring, but entertaining.
After that, you didn't let him go.
You followed him, stalking him, wherever he went.
Like a predator with its prey, observing it before killing it.
When he left for 7 years, he finally thought he had lost you…
You followed him.
For 7 fucking years he had to stay with you.
Even 8V>× didn't want to make a contract with you after seeing how weird you were.
Not to mention all the times you talked about love…
*add a disgusted Alastor*
You interfered in his life and never left, even though he tried to reject you.
And let's not even talk about your strange comments…
"Oh ! I wonder what red deer would taste like for dinner ! Or maybe a red wendigo ! Qu'en pense tu, Alastor ?"
“Red deer ?” *remembers that he is, technically, some sort of red deer/wendigo as a demon.* "Ha ha ! Stay 100km/h away from me."
When you arrived at the hotel, Alastor finally felt free ! After all his years of being the stolkant, you finally left him alone !
Well, not always, after all you would never leave your prey friend alone for too long, but you weren't with him all the time.
Alastor won't lie, not being with you 24/7 after so long was weird…
He finally had privacy-
100% complained to Rosie about you.
“And they never gave me space !” -Alastor
"Really ?" -Rosie
"Well, I'll give him some time alone. For the bathroom." -Rook!Reader, arriving out of nowhere behind Alastor.
Although Alastor considers you as a menace, there are times when he is grateful to you and to be your friend.
Like those rare times of weakness, when you helped him feel better, reassured him. It was the rare times he was grateful to have you as a friend.
I just know that when you want to talk about something private/you don't want others to hear you, you speak French.
Although sometimes you just do it to piss off other people.
"Mon cher cerf préférer ! Al' ! Je viens de découvrir quelque chose sur Vox, tu vas pas y croire !"
"Je vais préparer le thé, après tu me racontera."
You turn all Overlord meetings from boring to interesting meetings.
During meetings, you had the habit of telling everyone's secrets (except Alastor's secrets, bestie privilege), and always the most interesting ! Like this time you said you saw Carmilla decapitate an exterminator !
*After the song Respectless.* "Actually, mes chers amis, it is possible, or not, that I saw Carmilla decapitate an exterminator with her shoes. C'était un combat splendide !"
General Headcanon
You don't let anyone have privacy.
They know it, but they can't say anything.
Angel Dust suffered the most of that, he saw you during one of his shoots watching him in the shadows.. It was terrifying.
“Just try to be sexy.” -Valentino looking at Angel Dust during a shoot.
"Oh, mais mon cher, he's sexy enough like this ! Take off the underwear and people will love it !" -Rook!Reader behind Valentino, coming out of nowhere.
"MOTHERFUCKER-" *Add Valentino's scream of terror.*
You comforted Angel after each shoot, cheering him up in a more or less suspicious ways.
You call Angel Dust by his real name, Anthony. You are the only one in the hotel who knows his real name and calls him like that.
Angel Dust is sort of happy that someone thinks of him as Anthony and not Angel Dust.
Valentino hates you, as do all Vees and all the demons.
Lucifer found you weird the first time he meet you, and knowing your reputation, it was normal, but in the end you got along really well.
You 🤝 Lucifer = make Charlie and Vaggie have romantic dates by candlelight.
“Ah, youthful love ! Que c'est beau !”
“I miss the love of youth..” (in a dramatically way)
Did I mention that you and Lucifer are and always will be drama queens ?
You and Lucifer are just THAT bestie duo that everyone wants to be.
I can so see you having these dinners for two in fancy restaurants while being platonic. You say the most romantic things, speaking in French, and Lucifer joins you in those moments, doing the same.
"Oh, mon chéri, you look beautiful tonight ! Even more brilliant than usual !"
"Oh, I should be the one to tell you that ! You look beyond stunning tonight in that costume !"
You are trending on the networks.
Every. Fucking. Days.
On the networks, there are 3 teams; those who ship Lucifer x Rook!Reader, those who ship Alastor x Rook!Reader, and those who say you are a hopelessromantic and/or aromantic.
They have hilarious debates that you love to join for just fuck all and everyone.
"Well, it's true that Monsieur Alastor is quite handsome, but Lucifer ? Oh, je ne sais même pas ou commencer a son sujet !" -Rook!Reader on the networks screwing up between the teams, always changing the place between Lucifer and Alastor.
You are a star in all the circles of hell fr.
One day, Charlie asked you if you were dating her father after seeing what you were doing/writing on internet.
You answered some shit like "As much as I would love to be with him, je ne pourrais qu'en rêver. He is far too good and handsome man for a simple sinner like me."
Vaggie doesn't trust you, not in a million of eons.
Sir Pentious asked if you had a death wish after he saw you touch Alastor's deer ears…
"Oh, to die by the hand of such a magnifique et servant gentleman ! What an honor that would be !"
Sir Pentious has never seen Alastor back away from someone so fast before-
Niffty like you. You regularly complimented her on her work and her beauty.
Husk, on the contrary, doesn't like you.
He had to endure you and Alastor's shit for too long, 7 years without both of you wasn't enough.
You intrude into people's intimate moments.
And by people, I mean Husk and Anthony.
Imagine Husk and Angel Dust, just being quietly alone, a super romantic moment, and then, you pop in between the two…
But sometimes when you compliment them (one time per day), they like you.
I like to think that the Tik Tok hell version is like the one of the living, with people doing random ship. And Rook!Reader live for that.
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel x gn reader#hazbin hotel x male reader#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin hotel husk#hazbin hotel lucifer#angel dust#charlie morningstar#husker hazbin hotel#valentino#vox#vox hazbin hotel#sir pentious#niffty#vaggie#vaggie x charlie#alastor x reader#alastor x gn reader#alastor x male reader#in a way#lucifer x reader#lucifer x gn reader#lucifer x male reader#choose you team#Rook!reader#french reader#french writer#Raccoon is writing
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