#and y'all will not slander my son in my house

[theinfinitedivides]

the way proper subs aren't even out for some of y'all and you're already talking sh*t on MDL about whatever decision Gil Chae makes in ep 9 based on the comments of those who watched it without subs......... i can smell the misogyny from here

[alwaysaprille]

anyway...

I took a screenshot because L/xa’s name wasn’t properly edited. I originally wasn’t going to answer this because it’s obviously meant to incite drama, but it occurred to me that I’ve never actually answered this question on my blog at all and I do want to have this discussion. 

(This will be the first and only time I answer an ask like this as an FYI). This post is long, over 4000 words with this intro, so I’ve put it under the cut. It contains helpful bolding and italics as well as pictorial representation as further canon evidence. Happy reading!!!

1st: Let’s be clear that there was no love lost between L/xa and certain (relatively large) sections of her people. In fact, the show started planting the seeds of this in the episode following her betrayal of the Arkadians:

Lincoln: “How could you do this?”

Indra: “I swore loyalty to this commander.”

Lincoln: “She left our allies to be slaughtered. She dishonors us all.”

Indra: “And your disobedience dishonors you.”

Lincoln: “Why are you here, Indra?”

Indra: “Because you are also Trikru.”

Lincoln: “I can't just let her die.”

Indra: “Under the terms of the truce, the lands surrounding the mountain are forbidden. If you violate this, L/xa will never take you back. Octavia made her choice. Now you make yours.”

Episode 2x16 (Blood Must Have Blood Pt. 2)-This is the scene where Indra frees Lincoln so that he may go back and help the Arkadians in their fight. Lincoln (who most of your fandom seems to agree was a pretty decent guy) very clearly states L/xa dishonors (which here is a verb that means to bring shame or disgrace on) their way of life. He leaves his Clan behind even knowing that he will never again be accepted by his people, to return and help his Arkadian allies. 

His leaving in 2x16 is directly responsible for the kill order ( Bellamy in 3x01: “We all do, but until the Commander (here a proper noun always referring to L/xa-as it has since Season 1) agrees to lift the kill order on you, you're more trouble than you're worth.”) that we find L/xa has placed on him in Season 3. 

Next we head into Episode 3x01 (Wanheda, Pt 1) for a specific conversation between Indra, Monty, Kane and Bellamy:

Bellamy: “We know there’s a kill order. Your people are big on those.”

Indra: “It's not a kill order. It's a bounty. Clarke's a symbol. She's known as Wanheda... the Commander of Death.”

 Bellamy: “The Ice Nation guys we killed asked about Wanheda. They're looking for Clarke. Why?”

Indra: “My people believe that when you kill someone, you get their power. Kill Wanheda, and you command death.”

Kane: “She's just one girl.”

Indra:  “So was the Commander. What Clarke did at Mount Weather weakened her. The Ice Nation is emboldened. Their queen wants Clarke's power. If her people believe she has it, she'll break the coalition and start a war. I can't let that happen.” This conversation (which, again, happens in the first episode of the Season) very clearly establishes that L/xa is the one searching for Clarke (Something that’s even further established when we discover that Roan-the first bounty hunter we meet-was working for L/xa the entire time).It also establishes the reason why L/xa was looking for Clarke-she needed to keep Clarke, or more accurately Wanheda, out of the Ice Nation’s hands. 

And why, exactly did the Ice Nation want Clarke? It isn’t-as I’m sure some of you believe-because of some sort of poetic parallel between Clarke and Costia. Remember, as of right now, no one knows that Clarke and L/xa ever had any romantic inclinations towards one another, because L/xa betrayed her hours after their first kiss (which they shared alone in a tent). Nia only wanted to get her hands on Clarke to kill her in the hopes that she would gain enough power to break the coalition (which-may I point out-could only be accomplished by having L/xa voluntarily abdicate or by killing her.) Now why, if Nia wanted L/xa to step down, would she be searching for the Commander of Death?

So, to simplify: L/xa wanted to get her hands on Clarke first so that the power of Wanheda would be under her control. Make no mistake, if Bellamy or Monty had been identified as Wanheda (as was their right, because Clarke didn’t pull the lever alone and couldn’t have without Monty) L/xa would have sent bounty hunters out for either one of them instead of Clarke. Taking Wanheda was always about insulating her own power as Commander-not keeping Clarke safe.

To further establish the above stated point, L/xa literally says this in 3x02 (Wanheda, Pt. 2):

L/xa: “I'm sorry. It had to be this way. I had to ensure Wanheda didn't fall into the hands of the Ice Queen. War is brewing, Clarke. I need you.”

In 3x03 (Ye Who Enter Here) Clarke and L/xa have a conversation that once again highlights the point I’ve already made three times over:

L.xa: “I'm not just letting you go back to your people. I want something more. I want your people to become my people. I'm offering Skaikru the chance to join my coalition, become the 13th Clan. No one would dare to move against you because that would be moving against me.”

This is not L/xa trying to protect Clarke. This is L/xa trying to protect herself. Historically the only people who have been making moves against L/xa have been L/xa herself (The Commander in Season 1 who ordered every single last attack on the Delinquents was L/xa, let’s not forget) and Mt. Weather-all of whom Clarke killed. In refusing to allow Clarke to return to her people with no strings attached, L/xa reveals her hand. She needs Clarke’s “power” as Wanheda-and Clarke calls her on it two seconds later:

L.xa: “Join me. Bow before me, and your people will be safe.”

Clarke: “Bow before you? You don't give a damn about my people. I know why you're here. I made you look weak at Mount Weather, and now the Ice Nation is exploiting that (Oh, look, almost a word for word quote from Indra in Episode 1-see above). Well, if you want the power of Wanheda, kill me. Take it. Otherwise, go float yourself because I will never bow to you.” The scene immediately following this is L/xa kicking the Azgeda ambassador out of the Polis Tower window (which again-you all romanticize and say L/xa did because he threatened Clarke). However, Clarke was safely secured in Polis, a fact that L/xa was well aware of and what L/xa says after she kicks the ambassador out of the window only serves to show us what her real purpose is:

“Would anyone else care to question my decisions? Good. Then let's begin.”

This was a show of power. L/xa knows her people don’t believe in her. They think she is weak. To show them otherwise, she kicks out the only person in the room who is openly defiant of her.

Now, I’m going to show you one of the best card in my deck:

Look at all the people in this shot. If you count them, you get twelve. When the camera focused in on individual faces, you see the faces of the ambassadors who were in the throne room at the beginning of this episode. Now...refresh my memory, how many ambassadors were there before L/xa made the Arkadians the 13th Clan? Oh, that’s right. I think there were twelve. Which means, that pictured above, you have every single last ambassador in Polis, save one(Clarke), who wanted L/xa out. (Note-although Echo, Nia and Emerson are in this scene, they are not present until after this opening shot is shown.)

Now, just in case you think they just want L/xa removed from her position, but somehow kept alive, let me give you the dialogue from the scene:

Echo: “Ambassadors. Make way. I have a message for the Queen. My Queen.”

Nia: “Well?”

Echo: “You got your war. Thanks to the last Mountain Man.”

Emerson: “What about Clarke?”

Echo: “By the Commander's side, as predicted. Your son is a prisoner.”

Nia: “Not for long. Soon, he'll be free, and L/xa will be dead.”

Now, let’s breakdown what this dialogue tells us: The strike on Mt. Weather was a deliberate attack on L/xa and Clarke, not the Arkadians at large. The Mt. Weather explosion served a tri-fold purpose:

1. It creates tension between Arkadia and the Grounders. 

2. It creates tension between Azgeda and the Commander (in an attempt to force L/xa into the war that she was trying to avoid). 

3. It allows Emerson a small measure of revenge against Clarke. She killed all of his people, he killed hers and prevented her people from living in/taking advantage of his people’s supplies. 

It tells us that Azgeda seeking Clarke was also a deliberate ploy:

1. “....as predicted.” is a clear statement. Echo and Nia knew that in threatening to kill Wanheda (and absorb her power), the Commander would be forced to bring Clarke to her to keep her and her power out of Azgeda hands. 

It tells us that Nia and all eleven of the other original Arkadian ambassadors (after L/xa’s kicking) want L/xa dead. Not removed from her position. D.E.A.D.

This is episode 3x03. Two episodes before episode 3x05 (the episode in which Bellamy and 9 other people massacre the Grounder army-which is what y’all seem to think was the inciting incident for L/xa’s death.) 

We’re going to make a pit stop at 3x04:

Titus: “Do you have anything to say in your defense?”

Nia: “I need no defense. She (L/xa) does. Today is judgment day. I call for a vote of no confidence.”

Titus: “Take this queen to meet her fate.”

Some Ambassador: “Not so fast. Commander no longer.”

Some Other Ambassador: “Commander no longer.”

Some Lady Ambassador: “Commander no longer.”

Titus: “Take them away, too! L/xa, please execute these traitors...”

L/xa: “Let her make her move.” Literally every other ambassador: “Commander no longer.”

L/xa’s people wanted her dead before Bellamy ever stepped foot on the killing fields of Hakeldama. L/xa killing Nia and placing Roan on the throne may have solved one problem (Nia) but it did not fix the fact that the other ambassadors didn’t want her in her position either. They had 4 entire episodes devoted to that fact and y’all choose to ignore all the evidence that points to L/xa being a shitty leader so y’all can blame the MOC for her death. But I’ll keep going.

In 3x05 (Hakeldama-the very episode you all love to site as the reason for L/xa’s death), we have the following conversation between Clarke, L/xa and Indra:

L/xa: “So tell us, Clarke, how does this end? Have you come up with a way to save your people yet again?”

Clarke: “No. Only you can do that. What happened here was an act of war. Your army was here to help us, and my people slaughtered them. You have every right to respond, every right to wipe us out, or you can change the way you do things.”

 Indra: “Why should she change? Blood must have blood.”

Clarke: “Really? Because from where I stand, the only way that ends is with everyone dead. So what kind of leader do you want to be, the kind who kills every chance she gets because that's your way or the kind who shows the world a better way?”

L/xa: “You consider letting a massacre go unavenged a better way?”

 Clarke: “If it ends a cycle of violence, yes. If it brings about peace, yes. Someone has to take the first step. Let it be you. You say you want peace. Everything you've done was to achieve that, yet here we stand on the brink of another war, a war you could stop.”

 Indra: “Commander, you can't seriously be considering this.”

L/xa: “I'm not considering it. I'm doing it.”

Indra: “Heda, please.”

L.xa: “Indra, our people act as if war is easier than peace. If that's so, should we not try and achieve the more difficult goal?”

Indra: “Polis will not support you. Titus... “

L/xa: Titus is my subject. They're all my subjects. Do you say they will defy me? Will you defy me?”

Indra: “No, Heda. I will not.”

L/xa: “Then let it be known. Blood must not have blood.” And here we have the actual reason why L/xa died. I helpfully bolded the literal foreshadowing of her murderer for you. L/xa died because she turned her back on decades of Grounder tradition. And she didn’t do that because of Bellamy. In fact her reaction to the discovery of the massacre was this:

L/xa: “Send riders. I call upon the armies of the 12 Clans. In a day's time, we lay waste to Arkadia and everyone within its walls.”  

It is at Clarke’s urging that she decides to take up the mantle of “Blood Must Not Have Blood.” If she would have done what her people demanded, what Indra told her to do, instead of following Clarke’s idea (an eighteen-year old, actual alien from space who had no vested interest (or respect for) in Grounder culture) and laid waste to Arkadia, she would have been hailed a conquering hero-especially if she returned with Wanheda in her hand. 

But I’ll continue, on to 3x06 (Bitter Harvest):

L/xa: “I saw their deaths... at war, at the hands of an assassin.”

Clarke: “It was just a nightmare.”

L/xa: “No. No. It's a warning. They think I'm betraying their legacy. Jus drein, jus daun has always, always been the way of our people.”

Clarke: “Listen to me. A cease fire is not a betrayal. What you did on that battlefield stopped a war. Your legacy will be peace.” Again, helpfully bolding the foreshadowing. L/xa is clearly stating that she has been shown a vision (although we know how the Flame works thanks to Becca-and what the Flame does is read and decipher probability.) L/xa was shown the deaths of the previous Commanders.The last portion (at the hands of an assassin) a direct compare/contrast to the way she would die just one episode later. The Flame was telling her that her own actions in betraying “Jus Drein, Jus Daun” would be responsible for her death-something L/xa literally says (again-the bolded!).

And once again, it’s Clarke, a girl who knows nothing of Grounder tradition and law and cares for them not at all (unless it is in benefit to her own people), who tells her that she did the right thing. There are no Grounders who agree with her. That is important. Continuing:

Titus: “I believe he deserves death.”

L.xa: “She can speak for herself, Titus.”

Clarke: “Titus is right.”

Titus: “You see? It is human nature to need vengeance. Only once satiated can there be peace. That is our way.”

L/xa: “So blood must not have blood applies only when it is my people who bleed.”

Clarke: “That was about stopping a war. This is about finishing one. I'm sorry, but if you want my advice, I agree with Titus. He deserves to die for what he did.”

L.xa: “I'm not looking for advice. I'm looking for a decision. He was gifted to you. Crime he stands charged with is against your people. So what will it be, then, Clarke... banishment from our lands forever or death by 49 cuts from your hand? You have till sundown to decide.” And more proof that Clarke does not care about Grounder law unless it suits her needs (a fact which L/xa clearly points out in this very scene). As long as Blood Must Not Have Blood was useful to her, Clarke was going to ride the gravy train all the way home. 

“Now April,” you may be saying, “Clarke decided not to kill Emerson and that wasn’t in her favor (or Arkadia’s) so that must mean she values Grounder law and tradition.” And I will again say: “You’re wrong!” (and provide you with more facts:

First this bit of dialogue from Clarke’s conversation with Emerson:

Emerson: “I don't want mercy. I want revenge. I want you to suffer the same way that I've suffered. You can kill me, Clarke. You can never escape what you did. My pain ends today! Yours has just begun!” And when she leaves him, we find Clarke in conversation with Titus (who has surprised her in her room-again more foreshadowing!):

Titus: “I appreciate the predicament you're in, Clarke. I do. After convincing L/xa not to avenge the massacre of our army, it must be hard for you to choose to take your own revenge. Perhaps now you realize how difficult this new policy will be for our people to accept.”

Clarke: “This has nothing to do with what happened to your army. Emerson is guilty. Wiping out my people for the crimes of a few is not justice.”

Titus: “Did you not wipe out his people for what a few of them did to yours? You're a leader, Clarke. L/xa listens to you. Help me to protect her. Blood must not have blood is folly. Our people will not accept it, and I fear... I fear it will get her killed.”

Clarke: “I can't help you do something that leads to war against my people.”

Titus: “Then we're at an impasse.” Again, bolding the helpful sections. Let’s discuss them: Once again Titus spells out the reason L/xa will die (because Blood Must Not Have Blood is a change in tradition that the Grounder as a whole may not be willing to accept.) And what is Clarke’s defense? That the situation with Emerson is “different”. (Even though it’s not: Clarke, Bellamy and Monty killed everyone (almost 400 people) in Mt. Weather because of the actions of Dr. Tsing and Cage.  Pike and his Murder Co. killed 300 Grounders because of the actions of Azgeda). Titus rightfully calls her out on this (something which L/xa did earlier) and then: here’s the rub:

Titus clearly states that he is worried L/xa will die if she does not return to “Blood Must Have Blood” and he asks Clarke to protect her!!!!!

And Clarke says no. Clarke refuses to prioritize L/xa’s safety over that of her own people. I repeat, she knows (according to Titus-who is the Grounder’s holiest man-he is basically their Pope) that the Grounders do not like “Blood Must Not have Blood” and that he is afraid L/xa will die because of it. She knows that Titus does not like her and yet he was still willing to come and talk to her to save L/xa’s life and Clarke tells Titus “I can not do this thing that might save L/xa, but will doom my people.” Clarke chose her people over L/xa, the same choice she has been making since 3x03 when she bowed in front of L/xa.

Now, why is it important that Clarke says she can’t turn her back on “Blood Must Not Have Blood”? Well, I’ll take you right to this scene here:

L/xa: “We come together now, as we have countless times before, to watch a man die. Wanheda... vengeance is yours.”

Clarke: “No.”

And look at the faces in the crowd when she says no.

Clarke: “I don't know if your death would bring me peace. I just know I don't deserve it.”

Titus: “This man must die. If Skaikru will not take his life, then Heda will.”

L/xa: “Heda will speak for herself. Enough, Titus.”

 Emerson: “What the hell is this?”

Clarke:  “I wouldn't be killing you for what you've done. I'd be killing you for what I've done. I give this man his life. Jus Drein, no Jus Daun.”

And again the crowd is pissed:

L/xa: “Silence. The crimes of the Mountain can no be answered by one man.  Wanheda knows this. Her actions show us a promise for a new future, a world in which violence does not always answer violence, a world in which our children can flourish without the shadow of death. This prisoner is banished from my land. He will live, but he will live with the ghosts of those he has lost, haunted until the end of his days by the knowledge that he... is the last of his kind.”

Clarke: “May you live forever.”

Now we look at Emerson’s face:

and look at Clarke’s face right after:

What is life and death for L/xa was nothing more than a game for Clarke and she made a masterful move in this moment. In refusing to kill Emerson she has both saved her people and gotten her revenge against Emerson.

In not going with “Blood Must Have Blood” she prevents Titus, L/xa (and other Grounders) from using her actions as a motive to raze Arkadia and in forcing Emerson to live, she denies him the death (and opportunity to reunite with his family) he so clearly desires. 

And this is the moment that Titus decides to kill Clarke (which leads to L/xa’s death):

Titus decides to kill Clarke, because she allowed Emerson to live, even after he informed her that “Blood Must Not Have Blood” would likely cost L/xa her life. Because Titus loved L/xa and would have done anything to keep her safe. And you can’t even say that this moment is all because of the massacre, because it’s not! It all boils down to bad leadership on L/xa’s part:

1.If L/xa had never abandoned Arkadia at the Mountain, Clarke, Bellamy and Monty would never have had to pull the lever which irradiated the Mountain.

2.  If L/xa had not abandoned the Mountain, her people would not have had cause to label her dishonorable. 

3. If L/xa had not abandoned the Mountain, Clarke would not have been given the title of Wanheda.

4.  If L/xa had not abandoned the Mountain (therefore forcing Clarke, Bellamy and Monty to take out the Mountain, earning her the title of Wanheda and Emerson’s hatred) L/xa’s strength would not be in question. 

5. If L/xa had not abandoned the Mountain, Clarke, Bellamy and Monty wouldn’t have had to pull the lever, killing everyone inside including Emerson’s children, and resulting in Emerson’s need for vengeance against Clarke, which lead to Mt. Weather being blown up. 

6.  If L/xa’s strength were not in question, Nia would never have needed Emerson’s knowledge to blow up Mount Weather and would not have attempted to kidnap Wanheda.

7. If Clarke was not Wanheda, she would never have been in Polis in the first place. 

8.If L/xa’s strength were not in question, Nia would never have been able to sway 11 ambassadors to her side. 

9. If Nia had never been able to sway 11 ambassadors to her side, there never would have been the attempt at a unanimous vote for removal which led to a fight to the death.

10.  If L/xa had killed Roan and Nia (and any number of other Nia supporters-maybe even just declaring war on Azgeda outright), instead of appointing him to the throne, Roan would never have sent Emerson to Polis for Clarke after finding him in Azgeda territory.

11.  If Emerson had never been sent to Polis, Clarke would never have made the decision not to kill him.

12.  If Clarke had not made the aforementioned decision, Titus never would have decided to kill her.

13.  If Titus never decided to kill Clarke, L/xa wouldn’t have walked into the room upon hearing all of the commotion and been accidentally shot (which was sucky writing). 

And all because L/xa abandoned the Mountain in episode 2x15 (Blood Must Have Blood, Pt1)-a really interesting name when you consider that L.xa died because she was standing on “Blood Must not Have Blood”. 

So basically, long story short: L.xa died because she made shortsighted decisions. Also, she allowed a literal alien, with no respect or care for her culture or people outside of what they could do to save her own, influence her decisions, and turned her back on at least 40 yrs of tradition because of it. 

Short story even shorter: This is what happens when indigenous (coded) people let white people in to our societies. 

[chaeiimimi]

13 𝖍𝖊𝖑𝖑𝖔 𝖇𝖆𝖇𝖞

Summary: you weren’t really sure how it happened, but an average student who wore glasses and spent all her extra time on bookstores and library managed to date your school’s volleyball club setter. On your 3rd year of law school, your ten years anniversary to be exact, he went home from Argentina and it was a week before he was going back, he broke up with you with the reason of he can't handle long-distance relationship anymore despite being at it for two years. You didn’t cry, you stood there as he was sobbing in front of you, you held his face in your palms and offered him a gentle smile, gentle enough to let him know you’ll support him and will always be watching him, together with the child in your stomach right now, but he doesn’t need to know that.

chapter: prev//next

"i'm pregnant"

Oikawa looks back at her like its the most ridiculous thing she has ever said

"that has nothing to do with me, I never touched you" he says and was about to leave when Himari spoke

"yes it does Oikawa, I told the media you're the father"

"ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE?!" he was angry now, as much as he wants to strangle the lady , it was below him to hurt women

"what do you expect? The media thinks we're dating" she says, eyes on the ground

"who's the father?" Oikawa asks as he pinches his nose bridge in frustration

"a barista, from Argentina"

"then tell the media that"

"You don't understand-my image Oikawa you gotta help me"

The audacity of this woman never fails to mesmerize him, after all she's done she still has the guts to ask hin for help

"you really had the guts to ask me that when you almost ruined my family huh?"

Himari looks at him with pleading eyes

"look, I'm not going to play as the father of that child, y/n and my twins, it's going to hurt them" he says as he takes a deep breath

"then I'm just going to keep telling the media that you're the father who refuse to take responsibility then"

"you dont wanna play this game with me Himari, for a fully grown adult with a successful modeling career, you're still a child throwing a temper tantrum" and with that he left the house

He was shaking in anger, he needed you to be there with him, he needed you to calm him down

That night Oikawa wenr home to you crying on the couch while the twins were fast asleep

He slowly walks up to you "bubs the rumor- Himari she's- I'm not"

You sush him as you pulled him close and hugged hum tightly

"I know Tooru, you maybe an ass but I know you won't sleep with your ex's cousin" you say in between sniffles, Oikawa chuckles

"especially with someone as ugly as Himari"

The next few days was hell, you couldn't bring yourself to go to work due to the humiliation, you stayed at home watching over the twins

Every single day, Himari would just come out with fabricated receipts and false statement

She even acused you of always trying to steal Oikawa away from her since high school

The comments were tormenting to read, a lot of hateful and death threats on there, it was so disturbing

Oikawa's two week vacation was cut off as he was working with a company to arrange a press conference

The Aoba Josai former volleyball club showed their support, they constantly visited you and the twins especially Maki who had a lot of time on his hands , by now they already know they are Oikawa's sons

His team from Argentina heard about what was happening and some of them decided to fly to Japan to show their support

Iwaizumi and Akira came to your house practically everyday and brings good food

Honestly, you felt quite assured that a lot of people really care for you amd you weren't fighting this battle alone

Your parents even went to the hometown of Himari's parents to talk to them about the situation and they said Himari wouldn't listen to them

After a week of non-stop lies from Himari, it was time for Oikaw to step on the podium in front of flashing cameras

Some of his teammates and coach were there to show support, Iwaizumi, Issei and Maki were also there, they were both holding the twins, which has been the center of the attention for a while now

In the matter of seconds, the press conference has already begun

Akira was with you at home since you couldn't go to the press conference, the media was just going to crush you and your sef confidence was deteriorating because of all the hate you were recieving

"as you all know about the issue between me and model Sato Himari, first thing's first, me and her are not a thing, we are not lovers, we are not exes, I have been single for two years and the last girl I've dated is her cousin l/n y/n, who I'm currently dating again now"

There were a lot of murmurs going around the room but Oikawa was quick to silence them

"Y/n and I have been dating ever since we were in second year of high school, we dated for nine years and broke up two years ago, because of Himari slandering her in front of our head coach and I have proofd for that"

Oikawa clicks the little remote on his hand as the huge projector showed screenshot of Humari's and his Coach's messeges, it also showed a lot of pictures of you and Oikawa from Hugh School, contradicting Himari's statement that you tried to steal him in higgh school

"we are now back together and sharing our lives with our children who are twins Haruto and Hayato"

The press whipped their heads towards the twins who were pointing at Oikawa and giggling, the media awww-ed at the sight

"handsome aren't they? Yeah my lovely girlfriend gave birth to them" of course he was Oikawa

"as for Himari's pregnancy, I am positive that I am not the father of that baby, she told me that herself, if she denies it I'll gladly take a dna test when the baby is born so that I can expose more of her lies"

There were a lot of whispers going around, his teammates, ex-teammates and coach gave him a thumbs up

"I have been talking with my lawyers and I will be taking legal actions regarding this, that is all, thank you"

So I decided to post the last chapter tomorrow because I am going to change it, yes, that's how impulsive my ass is BSBSHSHSH anyways thank you so much to those who supported this until the end, I love y'all💖! Stay safe and happy luvs!

Taglist:

@heiressofdexter @artsamber @seashellmichellee @meri-soni-meri-tamanna @misssugarless @minnieminnie00-got7  @karakento @maizumis @torus-wiife @fiaesco @stormcastello @tintina365 @sakusasimpbot   @falconfeather23435 ​ @jojowantstocry @pluviophilefangirl ​ @qualitygiantshoepsychic

[reeree1500]

The Return- Part 5

Guys I'm so sorryyyy!😭I HAD MAJOR WRITERS BLOCK😭 It was actually so bad! And then the fact that Tumblr deleted my whole draft and I had to start it over again🙄 Big surprise towards the end btw😂Anyway here's part 5 y'all...

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 6 Part 7 part 8 part 9 Part 10

Disclaimer: My sucky writing, Incest, grammar and spelling😅 and just overall the whole thing😂 please don’t kill me🙏🏽😂 @yanii-the-hippie is already trying to😂

Taglist: @yanii-the-hippie @youbloodymadgenius @laketaj24 @oceans-daughter-3 @peaceisadirtyword @cainismyname @readsalot73 @wuxiesalt @camatsuru @amy8220 @cutegyrl927 @cindy-exo @affection-rabbit @ragnarssonsbitch @mel0nch0ly @queenofallthyfandoms

Flashback to 6 years ago...

“RUN! (Y/N)! RUN!” Helga screamed...

 On that fateful night you had been awakened from your slumber by one very worried Helga. She was the wife of the scary looking man Floki. And you could never come to understand how such a cheerful and radiant person, could be with someone so dark and mean. Helga had come in to the homestead whilst everyone was asleep. She had overheard her husband and Aslaug talk about getting rid of the christian child of Ragnar Lothbrok. She knew about (y/n), but she never thought that an innocent child would have to pay for the sins committed by those around her. 

As Helga made her way silently across the home trying to find the child, she couldn’t help but feel guilty. She was betraying her husband and the Queen at that. But she couldn't get over the fact that an innocent child would be murdered. When she sees (y/n)’s and Bjorn’s bodies cuddle up on the bed, she softly approaches the little girls’ side. Tapping her on the shoulder she manages to wake (y/n) up. Startled you go try tp scream and thats when she places her delicate finger over your lips. Signalling you to be quiet. “Follow me, you and your family are in grave danger.” The feeling of wanting to protect your family from anything consumed you. Even being 13 years old you understood that family came first and that you would gladly lay down your life to save theirs.  With that, you untangled yourself form Bjorn’s embrace and gave him a small peck on his forehead, then you made your way to your parent’s room. You peeked inside to make sure they were asleep and then tip toeing to where they lay in an embrace you softly kissed both of them goodbye.

You knew that this may very well be the last time you ever saw your parents. But, you could tell through the look in Helga’s eyes that whatever she was talking about your family being in danger was in fact the truth. Helga helped you gather some of your things quickly and as you rushed to the door, you almost forgot your teddy. “Wait, I need to grab my teddy. I cant leave without it, its the only thing I’ll have left of them.” You silently whisper towards Helga as she stands watch by the door. “Ok, but you must hurry. They'll be here any second now. And if they find you, I can assure you that no one will survive.” At that you scurry back towards your room. In there you find a sleepy headed Bjorn almost waking up. “(y/n), what are you doing? Come back to bed, you know we’re gonna start your training tomorrow morning.” He yawns out. “Sorry, I'm just really thirsty. Ill get a glass of water and come back ok?” you murmur to him. Bjorn just nods whilst yawning and goes back to sleep. But before you close the door and disappear you can hear him murmur the words I love you...

Your POV

After the moment that we shared in the Great Hall as a family happened. Mother, father, Bjorn and I had gone down to the lake by the old homestead we once lived in. There we all lied down on the grass and I had caught them all up on what had transpired on that night 6 years ago. “So let me clear this up, Helga...as in Floki’s wife. Broke into our home and kidnapped you and then sent you away on a boat to Frankia...” said Lagertha trying to wrap her head around the subject. “Well, mother I wouldn't really put it like that, but technically yes. She kidnapped me in order to save me and yourselves. Or so she claimed. She didn't really get into details on who was after me. She just told me that my life was in danger and I finally believed her when we were being chased by a group of mercenaries.” I respond to her. In that we all fall into silence. Over looking the lake I can tell that my family is processing all this information. Not only because of how quiet they are at the moment, but because I can feel their eyes on me. As if they believe that I shall vanish right in front of them.

“I missed this... Having my family together, overlooking the lake and just the serene and calming effect that this place has on us.” My father breaks the silence as he looks out towards the lake. He runs his fingers through my mother’s hair. And I cannot help but think about how come they never told me. “Soooo... since we’re all together finally. Can someone tell me how in the name of God and all that is good. No one ever told me about Aslaug and her sons?” With that my father’s fingers come to a stop at the ends of my mother’s long golden locks. “It just went something you tell your child out of the blue, (y/n).” My mother responds for my father. They always did this. Even as a child, when one of them was being questioned. The other would jump in and save them as if the question was directed at them. “But why keep it a secret? I don't understand, if you were married to Aslaug and Ivar and I are the same age that means that you laid with mother during the time you were married to her. Meaning that I have no claim to anything. Im a bastard.” At this my father lifts my mothers head from his lap and turns to me. Rage and sadness is what I am able to detect from his electric blue eyes.

“You are not a bastard child! I will not have you slander my name or your mothers with such lies. Your mother and I are married, in the eyes of both the Christian God and Freyja and Odin. Yes, your mother left me when Aslaug became pregnant with Ubbe. And many years later she came back to me, however I could not let her go. Be it selfishness or pride, she was mine and I am hers. Till death do us part!” At that tears well up in my eyes. Not because Ive just been scolded by my father. But, because this is the first time that I could really say that he has shown me his emotions. The night where we reunited, was only a small glance of emotion. But, this moment here had probably been the closest thing to a heart to heart that I have ever had with my father. He wipes my tears away and then goes to face Lagertha who had also been tearing up through this revelation.  And they share a small, but passionate kiss.

I do not know if its just the overwhelming emotion that I’m processing, but I cannot help but bring my finger to my lips and think of a certain ill tempered boy...

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As the hours went by, we had decided to not only renovate and clean up the homestead. But we relieved some of the old memories we had. Bjorn and I decided to get in the water and go for a swim. Whilst Lagertha and Ragnar stayed in the house “cleaning up”. Bjorn and I knew exactly what that meant. As I laugh thinking about the situation that my parents are in. Bjorn sneaks up behind me and dunks my head into the water. I try my hardest to push him away and try to get rid of his hold on my head. My lungs need a break and as I almost felt my self drifting away, Bjorn pulls me back up. Gasping for air and coughing out the water from inside. I turn around and hit Bjorn’s chest as hard as I could muster at the moment. “Bjorn! What the hell!! you could've killed me!”   I yell at him through my punches. “Ow..ow.. OW!!!. I was just joking... Jeez woman lose up!” He responds trying to shield himself form my hits. “Well it wasn't funny...”

As I swim towards the shore and go to collect my clothes, Bjorn turns me around and looks into my eyes. “We need to talk. And it’s not something that you are not getting yourself out of.” At this I can only gulp. Did he find out about Ivar and I? Is it possible that Hvitserk told him? No..no, Hvitty wouldn't do that. But then again he’s know the boys his whole life. I have just met them. “What about, big brother?” “Sigurd told me something when we had been waiting for mother’s arrival. And you could say I‘m a little concerned, and I just want to get to the bottom of it.” He says while eyeing me carefully. At that moment before I could respond the sound of the horses hooves could be heard form down the road. Bjorn and I quickly exchange looks and begin to dress immediately. We run towards the homestead and burst through the doors. It seems as whatever mother and father had been up to had just finished. 

Seeing our exasperated sighing and how flustered I must have looked father reaches for his sword. “Why are you both so out of breath?” Mother asks wrapping the quilt around herself.  “We heard horses down the road. We didn't know if they were friend or foe. And Bjorn didn't have any of his weapons with him.” I manage to get out. At this both father and Bjorn make their way towards the door.  Peeking out the one of the small holes Bjorn is able to make out who it was standing outside. “Its the guards accompanied by Ubbe, Hvitserk and Ivar.” Something told me that this would be quite eventful...

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Ivar POV

The moment (y/n) and her mother reunited in the great hall brought a tear to everyones eye. I admit that maybe I got a little emotional as well, but no one would ever know that. However, I noticed that my beautiful mother had left the room with rage and tear filled eyes. I had never seen my mother go through so many emotions in one day. She went from having a good blessed morning to having a shit hole day with that whore Lagertha coming back. I mean she gave birth to my beautiful (y/n), but still. Every time I see her I cannot help, but want to choke her to death fro all the pain she caused my mother.

Shaking me from my thoughts Ubbe starts going off on Hvitserk. “How could you be so stupid! (Y/n) has a target on her back and you decided to go off into the woods alone without anyone else?!?!?!” In this sense Ubbe was right, Hvitserk put (y/n)’s life in danger all because he wanted to take her from me. It wasn't enough for these people that I am a cripple. But they want to take the woman that the gods sent to me! This is unacceptable and I will not allow it. “Ubbe is right. She could have been killed because of your insolence Hvitty!” I scream at him. My blood had been boiling at this point. “Oh shut up Ivar! We all know that if she would have asked you to go with her, you would have done the same. If not take her some place remote where she could not leave your crippled ass!” Hvitserk barks back at me.

All this time Sigurd is sitting by the fire pit whilst tuning his lyre. “You both should just accept the fact that you're in love with your own sister. And that it will never go anywhere. Besides I overheard father speaking in his chambers the other day with Bjorn. They're looking for suitors to marry her off to. That way she will be hopefully safe from whoever is hunting her.” Sigurd says as calm as one could ever be. At this my mouth hangs open and Hvitserk and I exchange glances. “N..No... That cannot be. Father would never marry (y/n) off to someone she doesn't know. And the fact that he just got her back should keep him form doing so as well.” Hvitserk struggles to say. Im still trying to process the fact that my purpose to live will be taken from me once again. This I cannot allow...

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“Ivar you’re sure that this is the right way?” Hvitserk asks me for the hundredth time. This time instead of answering I just keep going. This man-child will not drive me insane today. Not when the task at hand is so dire. Making our way through the woods and down the path, I spot my father’s horse as well as 3 other ones. Urging my horses to go faster I catch a glimpse of (y/n) runnings towards the homestead whilst trying to slip her dress back on. The way that the drops fell from her hair and onto her chest and then down the valley of her breasts made me come to a halt. Before I knew it the guards and Ubbe had all passed me and there I was still sitting in my carriage on the same spot. Once she was out of my sight, I got it together and got to the house. There we were greeted by father and Bjorn. “Ubbe. what brings you all down here?” my father asks. “We wished to know what we should do about the investigation. You all just took off without alerting anyone.” At that Lagertha steps out of the homestead clearly in a disheveled dress. From that we can guess what her and father were up to before we could get here. 

“Actually Ubbe... Your father and I have come to terms that (y/n) shall be trained by me. This way I can properly teach her how to use her strengths and weaknesses to her advantage. Something you boys will not be able to teach her.” At the mention of this (y/n)’s eyes widened in surprise. “Well... Mother (y/n) isn't really one to train, if Im honest with you. Poor girl is was never taught how to properly defend herself. And through all the training that we've put her through, its not much of an improvement...” Bjorn says, but then trails off due to (y/n) punching him in the gut. I can tell you that I have never been as in love with someone as I am with my own sister. Which is ridiculous to many, but the truth...

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Your POV

Weeks from the time that my mother arrived had gone by. My training started immediately after the conversation that we all had at the porch. Ubbe and the boys had finally gotten somewhere with the investigation with the help of Lagertha. They had found the murder weapon, a small dagger with intricate designs. Bjorn had taken it to get a closer look, but from what I had seen in his eyes I could tell that he knew who was behind this. As I think of who could have been behind the murder of my best friend, the wind is knocked out of me. “(Y/N)! Concentrate! Never take your eyes off your opponent! Thats the number one rule on the battlefield!” My mother yells at me from above. Extending her hand out towards me I grasp on to it and she pulls me up from the ground. Dusting myself off I mumble an I’m sorry to her and that I will concentrate next  time. “When facing a real opponent child you will not have the luxury to be better again. Its do or die!” She holds onto my shoulders as she looks into my eyes and then leans her forehead against mine. “I want you to be able to defend yourself. It might come a time where neither your father or I. Bjorn and your brothers will be there to protect you. And I need to be able to sleep at night with the thought that my child will not be taken from me again by some imbecile...” 

My mother and I exchange a final glance before she heads off towards the great hall in what I think is an attempt to find my father. My father and Bjorn have been very secretive lately. Every time I walk into a room I can tell that the conversations they were having were about me before I got there. And it was very much getting on my nerves. Picking up the bow that Ivar had made for me I start to aim at the dummy target. But before I knew it something startles me and I let go of the arrow without knowing where it would hit. “AHHHHH, are you trying to kill me woman?!??!”

“Ivar, Oh my God I’m so sorry. You startled me.” I say whilst rushing towards him. “I see that you've taken a liking to the bow I crafted for you...” blushing from his words I simply nod my head and stare at the ground. “(y/n). I wanna have a serious conversation with you. But it must be done in private.” He whispers the last part to me. I rear my head towards him and proceed to grab his hand. Ivar takes it upon himself though to lace our fingers together and walk together to "our” chambers. Passing by the market, I notice the looks that people have been given us and the not so quiet whispers. Embarrassed and not wanting to drag attention to myself anymore than I already have. I attempt to let go of Ivar’s hand, but he will have none of it. He jut grips my hand harder and walks a little faster towards the cabin. 

Once inside Ivar walks towards the bed and starts taking off his braces. “Close the door please. I would like this to be a private conversation between you and I. For the time being.” Doing as told, I close the door behind me and make my way towards him. Ivar is struggling to get one of his braces off, so without thinking I kneel before him and push his hands away to try and help him out. At this action Ivar looks at me with shock and a hint of adoration. Over the last 3 months that I have been here. I observed Ivar take his braces off before bed. Something about them fascinated me and I couldn't pinpoint what it was. Picking myself up from the floor I go to sit beside him on the bed in one swift movement Ivar pushes me back on the bed and gets on top of me. 

Before I could scream his lips touch mine. Unlike the times before I find myself reciprocating the kiss. Our lips begin to move in sync with each other. He traced his tongue on my bottom lip asking for entrance which I denied. At this he got frustrated and slapped my ass. As I opened my mouth to yell at him for hitting me, he took this as a chance to slip his tongue in my mouth. There was no fight for dominance as he overtook the situation. My fingers tangle in his hair trying to pull him closer to me. His hands caress my sides and then cup my breasts. In this I cant help, but let out a moan. Ivar pulls back and stares at me while bringing his hand up to brush my hair outta my face. “I would really love to continue this, but there's something I have to tell you (y/n).” He untangles himself from my grasp and brings my hand to his lips. Placing small kisses on the back of my hand he closes his eyes and then reluctantly gets up. As I lay on the bed, I can only think of what we were up to seconds ago. What would have happened if we didn't stop. Pulling me into his lap and out of my thoughts Ivar grabs my face in his hands. 

“Before you got here I was a scared and lonely boy. With no notion of what love was or could have been. To think that the gods made you especially for me and brought you to me at the most opportune time is a sign from Odin himself. (Y/n) I will not let them take you away from me. Not now or ever...”  Ivar closes the gap between us with a small and tender kiss. “Ivar... it’s wrong. How we feel about one another isn't right...” my eyes well up with tears. What cruel joke is this that God is playing. Why? How come the man that I love is my brother... Brushing my tears away, I could tell that Ivar is having the same predicament. “Father plans to marry you off... That is what I wanted to talk to you about.” His eyes do not meet mine this time. “Wait...no it cant be. Father would never do that. he always said that I would be free to marry whomever I pleased and fell in love with...” Nothing the change in my breathing Ivar hugs me and rubs my back. “I will not let them. You will not be sold like cattle just because they cant find the killer and are afraid.”

“This is why I want you to runaway with me. Will you (y/n)...” 

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Bjorn POV

I cannot control the anger boiling inside me. How could she do this... Storming off from the meeting I went straight to my cabin. There she greeted me as if nothing was wrong. “Love I made some...” Throwing the bowl of soup from her hands I pushed her back onto a chair. “Bjorn what's wrong with yo...” “What wrong with me?!?!?! How about what's wrong with you? You killed Mira! You tried to kill my sister!” At this point all I see is red. I cant even describe how I felt when I saw that the murder weapon was Torvi’s dagger. And to think I was gonna tell her the truth and let her in on the reason as to why she could be wanted dead. “Bjorn.. please! It was not like I wanted to do it! Aslaug forced me too. She had said that you were in danger! Please Bjorn you have to believe me! I did it for our family!” Shaking my head at her I turn around and head towards the door. “Get your stuff, I don't want you here when I come back. I will tell my father everything that you and Aslaug have been planning. And for the sake of what we once had I will give you this heads up so you can leave. And do not come back!” Slamming the door of the cabin I head towards the great hall and begin t think to myself about the first time I laid eye son my sister....

19 years ago...

“Bjorn... come meet her.” I didn't want anything associated with that child. The fact that I had already lost a sister and that my parents had now taken in a child that wasn't theirs baffled me. “She's not my sister. She the child of a christian priest...” At that my mother looks at me with sadness in her eyes. “Bjorn I know that you still hurt over Gyda and the fact that she didn't survive and you did. This child however is your sister. No matter how she came into this world, the gods have given us a second chance. Please come and meet her, for my sake?” At that I go towards my mother and get a closer look at the child. Her features resembled that somewhat of my father’s. Not much, but enough to be able to pass as the child of my father and mother. “What about Athelstan? Is he okay with you taking his child?” I ask my mother. At that my father walks in and kneels before me. “You must protect her with your life Bjorn. From this day onward she will be yours to take care off. She is your sister and no one must know that in fact she is Athelstan’s daughter or she and all of us will be in danger.” At that I understood why my parents had done it. Taken a child that wasn't theirs in order to protect it. Although I didn't want her, I cant help but feel a strong sense of protection over her. As if my sole task in this world is to protect her... “Bjorn...she doesn't have a name yet. Would you like to name her?” My mother asks whilst placing the child in my arms. The baby opens her eyes and looks up at me. Her beautiful eyes open up to reveal those (y/e/c) orbs. She cracks a smile at me and at that I cant help, but laugh. “(Y/n)...her name will be (y/n).”

[s-o-a-p-ing]

EPHESIANS S.O.A.P. ~ CHAPTER 4 ~ (Friday, 8/7/20)

SCRIPTURE:

Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God. Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.......let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes.And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil....Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior.   ---  Ephesians 4:1-2, 23,26-27,31

OBSERVATION:

You know, the "cabin-fever" nature of these past 147 days - 21 weeks - has frayed nerves and patience for all of us here at my house... and anger is a foothold to the devil for all manner of selfishness - not just harsh words, fractiousness, and violence, but also mumbling / grumbling, grousing, abusive and addictive behaviors against others and myself - often not even involving the one who I let get me angry in the first place...  And this "foothold" gets in the way of my letting the Spirit act - not the Spirit's ability TO act, but my receiving and responding to His actions... in humility, gentleness, patience, and love - as much towards myself for my own shortcomings and "allowing" others and events to pull my strings and rile me up in the first place...

APPLICATION:

It's right there in the scripture:Always be humble Always be gentle Be patient Make allowance Love Let - allow - the Spirit to renew me and my thoughts and attitudes (It's never too late to start again)

PRAYER:

Eternal Father - Renewing God - forgive my reactionary, knee-jerk reflex to fall into frustration and anger with others and myself over minor and useless things - Remind me of Your calling on my life - grant me patience and understanding - May Your Holy Spirit remind me of His presence and power to renew my heart and remind me things aren't all about me, but about You and Your Son's redeeming love - and that I might give You the glory and praise when I realize Your actions in my life are not my former reactions - In Jesus's Name... In Jesus's Name...

I pray y'all have an enjoyable weekend... and that you'll reach out if I/we can do anything...

As always, yours always, in all ways - in and through Him...

g

<))>< ~~~~~~

[anodyne-sunflower]

Rust to Gold (Part 1)-Jack Jackson series

A/N: Guys!! It’s finally here. Not sure how many of you have actually seen PotE but, regardless I hope y'all enjoy. I really love the idea I came up with for his series. While I’m sure it won’t be my popular one, again because I believe not many of you actually know about Jack lol I still adore writing it! Few notes before you read on: I’m using the tv series timeline not the book. I won’t go into too much detail with her father, but you could say it’s Louis VII of France since he reigned at the time. This starts in 1138 like the show does. I am skipping Jack and Tom’s introduction because that’s not really needed for reader and Jack’s story. However, Tom is obviously in this and it will contain and follow the majority of the characters and story lines. And yes, some of history will be a little tweaked if for creative purposes. But, since this is mainly on reader it’s not like I’ll have her interfere entirely with history. It’ll be very very minor. Enjoy!

MOOD MUSIC: Throne for the game ft. Bradley Hanan Carter by Ramin Djawadi

***

The dictations of one’s future was a concept you had grown agonizingly familiar with. Being a woman, your father had every right and determination to choose every aspect of your life for you. No matter the cost of your relationship with him. It was a constant reminder of your duties as princess, to blindly follow those demands of your king. With or without hesitation. And yet, in spite of all that you could not bring yourself to obey him this time. There was moments in your life where ignoring his shouts for proper conduct became a habit, except you often caved to his whims by the end of it. After all, a threat to your life was something you couldn’t bear. Now, however, you found the ounce of strength in you to resist his plans.

“You would deny me? Deny your kingdom?! You ungrateful child! I have given you everything! And you disobey me at every turn!!”

Your father’s hands slammed onto the arms of his throne, making you flinch slightly at the loud sound. But, you held your head high tightening your jaw in order to remain the very picture of calm. It was not easy to defy a man like your father, especially when he ruled all of France.

“I would deny you the pleasure of marrying me off to the first man who comes with a bag full of coins and promises of expansion!”

You spat back, breath heavy with contempt for the man who raised you. If that’s what you could call his lifelong lessons in court. It was a risky move, one that you knew deep down would not end well for you. But, you could not bring yourself to marry just anyone. Your heart was not a bargaining tool, no matter the person wagering it.

“What you speak is treason.” His voice grew soft, though the bite behind it was all too clear. “Defy me now, and I will have you hang for this. Do you understand me?”

“I-”

“Do you understand me?!”

Every word sent chills down your spine, and flattering was the only option your mind wished for. Yet, you could not betray your heart of that you were certain. With every courageous spark in you, you straightened up. Rising on your feet again as you clasped your hands in front of you and stared your father, the king, down.

“Then I shall hang.”

If there was ever a time you saw any hope of pride in him for you, it was oddly now. Perhaps it was the bravery you displayed, but for that brief second he smiled. It was altogether shocking and disgusting, but a man’s honor was everything. And proud of the courage you had or not, he’d still move to execute you.

“You play a dangerous game, child. Take her to the dungeons.” He waved his hand away, not looking at you anymore as the guards neared you. But, you held a hand up keeping your pride about you as you turned away and led yourself down to the bottoms of the hellish castle prison. The guards stuck by you, one hand held above the pommels of their swords and the other holding a shield. You knew if you ran they wouldn’t hesitate to kill you. A prince was an heir, a princess was expendable.

As you stepped down the large stone stairs into the dungeons, your heart began to sink. Knowing that every second that went by was bringing you closer to your last breath. Many children would think their father’s loved them, no matter their rebellious nature. Yours was not that father. If you slandered his name, you would pay, and denying his pick of a suitor did just that. It was an embarrassment, and now you were going to pay with your life.

“May I ask a favor of you?” A sigh left your lips, eyes staring into the dark prison you would soon be housed in. The floor was a mess, hay and water scattered amongst the stones. And only one tiny hold of a window that could bring daylight in. “Will you fetch my handmaid for me?”

The guards stood quiet at first, both of them looking to one another for an answer. And if only for the reason that they watched you grow from child to woman, they agreed.

“At once, your highness.”

It was a needless courtesy on their part, calling you by your title. Because, you knew their allegiance was to the king and only the king. But, you thanked them all the same, following their orders as they gently pushed you into the dungeon. The door behind you slammed shut, the sound of them locking the wooden door only causing your heart to sink further into despair. It shouldn’t be a surprise, but the reality of your refusal was now before you.

Time ran slow inside here, you could only count yourself blessed that the sun was still out. It allowed a sliver of light to bathe across your skin, warming you under the dress you wore. A nice comfort in the cold of the prison.

“Your highness!”

The sound of your servant caught your attention, and you rushed to the door to see her through the small bars at the top. It was the first time you get a semblance of joy today, and you reached over the small window to grab her hand.

“Matilda, I’m so glad you came.

“Why on earth wouldn’t I?” She smiled, though you could see the concern she felt for you. She was always a loyal one, a very rare thing in these times. And her friendship meant a great deal to you. She was originally your playmate, a gift from your father when you were 7. She grew alongside you, and you had come to see her as a sister. She was never a birthday present in your eyes, but always family.

“I fear I’ve made a foolish mistake.” A small laugh left you, but the obvious anguish behind it was evident. Something Matilda easily caught on to. But, ever the sweet one, she brushed her thumb over the back of your hand and shook her head.

“I’ve always admired your will, and even now I still do. You cannot marry that awful man. The rumors around him are numerous, and I believe your fate would be the same no matter what you choose.”

She was not wrong, you had heard your fair share of rumors surrounding William Hamleigh. The son of a lord who likely had the archbishop on his purse strings. He held no title to him, but his family was still rich enough and had powerful connections that your father was positively mad for.

“I think you’re right…” You held her hand tightly, leaning your forehead into the door as you whispered your heartache. “It’s pathetic. I stand by my choice then, but all the same I do my wish for death.”

Matilda was silent, and you thought perhaps she was sharing in your current state of depression. Instead, she released your hand and patted softly on the door.

“I promise, you will not die today.”

It was the last thing she said before running off, leaving you confused and lonely in the growing darkness.

***

Hours went by, and you began to grow nervous for your friend. Whatever she was planning was likely going to cause trouble, but you’d rather take the fall than have her life forfeit on your behalf. You tapped impatiently at the floor, heels digging into the straw as you say against the floor. By now you must’ve looked a mess, as the winter winds grew strong at night and snuck into the lower parts of the castle. If your father waited anymore days, you were likely to succumb to the elements as opposed to the gallows.

A soft knocking gained your ear, and you quickly turned your head towards the door thinking they had come for you in the dead of night. It was an odd choice and time for execution, but perhaps your father was eager to be rid of you.

“Your highness?”

The whisper of her voice made you relax back into the wall, and you smiled as you warned Matilda of her dangerous intentions.

“I know what you’re up to, and it’s too dangerous.”

“Nonsense. Just trust me, the perks of being a servant, I know every part of this castle better than you. How else would I sneak food?”

You laughed heartily at that, knowing fully well that she had done so quite often. Not that you could blame her, under your father’s rule everyone was likely to starve if he saw fit.

With a click and screech of the lock the door slowly drew open, and you scrambled up to your feet. Matilda stood at the doorway, joyfully smiling as she hugged you to her. The reunion could not last long, because you were sure the guards would catch on quickly.

“You’ve gone mad. You’ll be killed for helping me.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll be fine. I promise.”

Ever the optimistic one, you thought. And while you didn’t want harm to come to her, she seemed so sure of herself that you willingly followed her down the dungeon halls. Every time you turned a corner you glared both ways, heart going wild in your chest as fear and doubt took over. People rarely escaped from here, and when they tried the end results were far worse than the original sentence.

“This isn’t-”

“Shh.” Matilda hushed you, not bothering with a torch as it would prove too risky a move and alert the guards to your locations. She grabbed your hand, nearly running down the halls and under a large gap in the stairs. It led directly into the waterways, and you were slowly realizing just how knowledgeable the servants likely were. It was almost a miracle that none of them had been bribed to assassinate the king with all the secret passageways they knew.

Your dress soaked up the water, making you more than uncomfortable. You were not dressed for skulking about castles, and thankfully she had thought of that.

“Put this on, hurry!”

She shoved a bag of clothes towards you, and you sifted through the bunch. It was not something you would’ve ever worn around here, and frankly from the looks of the brown robes they belonged to a peasant.

“What is this?”

Matilda sighed at you, keeping an eye on the exit of the tunnel as she rushed you.

“Your highness, if you are to live tonight it is because you leave here a commoner. Not a princess of France.”

Her words filled you with a sense of sadness. As much as you despised the man on the throne, this was your home and you loved it. But, there was as always truth to her statements. You reluctantly nodded, allowing her to help you get out of your current attire and into the simple robes of your new identity.

“Come on then, your highness.”

Matilda led you out of the tunnel, her eyes scanning the open field in your view for any sign of possible danger. She pointed towards the hill that led deep into the forest where your father hunted, and with a solemn smile she hugged you.

“You are meant for great things, Y/N. And it is because of this and our friendship that I happily risk my life for you.”

You dug your fingers into her back, gripping her close to you in a goodbye that would no doubt last forever. You couldn’t bear the thought of not having her around, but you couldn’t let her help go in vain.

“I’ll miss you.”

Matilda smiled at that, kissing your brow before cupping your cheeks and fighting her tears. “And I will miss you, my friend.”

She shoved you out of the tunnel, frantically moving her hands for you to get going and leave. You stared back at her every step, only stopping when you were at the edge of the woods to bid her one last heartfelt farewell.

***

You fell forward onto your horse, barely holding the reins as you felt your exhaustion settle in. It had been days upon days since you left France. Traveling on foot for so long before taking a ship to England. The people you met along the way had been decent enough, save for those who desired to rid you of every coin you had. There wasn’t much Matilda could give you, but what she had was kind enough. It helped you gain passage along the sea, before you managed to settle a bargain and take a man’s horse. But, your journey was tiring and with no plan on where to go or settle you were left lonesome and nearly poor.

Your stomach grumbled, once again alerting you to your starvation. You couldn’t even remember the last time you ate, but every minute reminded you of that painful feeling.

“Just a bit more…” You patted your horse, trying hard to stay atop him as he traversed the forest paths. It was still winter time, which only proved harsher to your travels. The cloak you wore hardly contained your body heat, and the biting wind hurt far more than you ever imagined. But, you had to force yourself to keep moving on. Hoping at some point your new home would make itself obvious.

“Just a little….more…” Your eyes drifted shut, your mind fighting against sleep until every ounce of willpower you had drained from your body. With a groan of discomfort, you slid sideways falling roughly from the horse and onto the cold ground of the forest. And all at once everything went black.

***

Soft hums and murmuring could be heard somewhere in the endless corners of your dreams. A woman’s comforting tone beckoning you to wake, though you weren’t sure if it was real or not. But, it was soothing, reminding you of your mother who had passed so long ago you barely remembered her features.

“Mother…?”

The woman laughed, making you slowly open your eyes to the sound. She was a blur to you, but you could faintly make out the reassuring smile she held. She patted a cloth to your forehead, parting your hair so she could have better access. She was still humming something, whether that was a song or a spell you weren’t sure. But, you were still grateful to be here in the warmth of a fire.

“Easy now, you hit your head hard.”

“What?” Your voice was hoarse, no doubt from the weather. But, she still understood you and she offered you a cup of water that you were forever thankful for. You drank eagerly from it, almost choking when the soothing liquid ran down your dry throat.

“Ahh, careful.” She took the cup from you, placing it aside and patting your cheek. “You will recover. You must rest though.”

“Who are you?” You forced out, groaning when you turned onto your side. The woman just smiled again, putting some bowls down that contained some sort of salve.

“You can call me Ellen.”

You nodded in thanks, finding the strength to sit up. You held your arm over your stomach, leaning back into the cave walls and examining the area. It was no doubt this was her home, and while you couldn’t exactly believe living in a cave was ideal there was something oddly wonderful about it.

“Hungry?”

You glanced towards her, watching her stir a pot of stew on the fire. “Oh yes, please.”

Ellen just chuckled again, pouring some food into a bowl and handing it over to you. She walked on her bare feet to the small stool in the corner, continuing her work.

“Thank you, for the meal. And everything else…”

“You are welcome. We need to take care of each other, yeah? I could not leave you to freeze out there.”

You nodded gratefully, taking a spoonful of the meal and delighting in the warmth of it. It was the first time you had decent comfort since you left France, and you didn’t want to leave anytime soon.

“You live here?”

“Yes. There is a village not far from here, my son lives there. He’s a sculptor, a great one.”

She had this grin on her face when she spoke of him, and you believed it to be the pride of a mother. But, you felt there was more to it than that. As if that grin was meant for you as well.

“A sculptor? That’s magnificent.” You glanced around the cave, taking note of the faces carved into the stone of the walls. It brought a smile to your face, now that you knew the source of the beautiful work. “He’s very talented.”

“He is.” She watched you carefully, following your gaze as you took in her son’s work. “You should go there. Kingsbridge. They are building a new cathedral there, there’s work. I’m sure they will take you.”

The first thing that arose in your kind was your father’s words, about princesses never needing to work besides providing heirs. You wondered what he’d think now. There was no doubt he had already sent party after party searching for you, but chances were high he had no idea you could make it so far from France. That made you feel safe.

“Work?…I wouldn’t even know what I could do? I don’t really possess any skills.”

You hoped that hadn’t given anything away, because aside from needlework, and basic royal skills nothing of the common folk made sense to you.

Ellen just smiled, mending the fire as she spoke. “You can learn.”

It made you smile, because she sounded just like Matilda. Always believing in you when you least expected it. You made to speak, moving the bowl to the side as you pulled the blanket over you tighter. But, as the words left you the sound of footsteps cut you off.

“I’m so sorry I’m late, Mother. Philip was in a mood today.”

A young man with the brightest red hair you had ever seen entered the cave, a small bag of things over his shoulder as he removed the hood of his cloak and reached towards Ellen. He pulled her into a warm hug, kissing her cheek and smiling. You watched the entire exchange curiously, feeling very much out of place.

“My boy, Jack.” She laughed joyously, cupping his cheeks and not wanting to let him go. But, for his sake she let him take a seat, before she moved to fetch another bowl for him.

This Jack didn’t seem aware of you at first, his green eyes following his mother’s movement until she waved towards you.

“Say hello to my guest, Jack. Don’t be shy.”

Jack looked towards the direction she pointed, his eyes widening when he set his gaze on you. It was the first time you ever saw a man flustered, and there was something endearing about it. Most men at court took it upon themselves to leer at you, or even touch what they believed to be theirs. But, this Jack fellow just blushed softly, averting his gaze several times before giving a smile.

“Morning.”

He simply spoke, looking back up at you with mild interest. You returned the gesture, holding your hand up in greeting.

“You’re the sculptor. It’s nice to meet you, Jack.”

***

A/N: I knowww, not much in the way of Jack this part, but I had to set the stage ;) Feedback highly welcomed!!! And appreciated. ❤️