#and while I was being eaten there was a button on my hand that said ''reset'' and I pushed it and woke up
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lab-gr0wn-lambs · 2 years ago
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Y’know my dreams are always fucked up and weird but I can usually figure out what parts of my subconscious made that happen. But then there’s nights like last night where it was Hop Pop and Sylvia covered in prison tattoos flying a wooden fighter-plane through a British council-estate swarming with lovecraftian horrors and I just have to lay there in the morning and think what in the meaty fuck was that
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punkshort · 1 month ago
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Swept Away | Chapter 10: Turn the Tide
Pairing: sugardaddy!Joel Miller x f!reader
Chapter Summary: A devastating discovery leads you back into Joel's arms. But do you both have what it takes to make it work?
Chapter Warnings: language, sugar baby/daddy dynamics, mountains of angst, miscarriage (discussions and descriptions included, not terribly graphic, blood is mentioned, please skip if this is triggering for you), hurt/comfort, fluff, brief mention of vomit, anxiety, reader has long-ish hair, smut (18+ MDNI), fingering, protected piv sex, secrets are revealed and explain some underlying anxieties/trust issues
WC: 16.6K
Series Masterlist
One Month Later
"Jesus Christ, this place is doing a number on my allergies," Celine whined when she opened your apartment door to find you curled up on your couch with a heating pad. She looked around the room and shook her head, dropping her purse and keys on your floor because every single flat surface was being taken up by flowers. Flowers Joel had been sending you every fucking day since he dropped you off. "How can you stand it in here?"
"I can't," you muttered, staring listlessly at the television while she opened up the windows as far as they would go. "Been meaning to look into places where I could donate them but I'm in the middle of the worst period of my fucking life."
"Yeah, I can see that," she replied before collapsing in a huff on the other end of your couch. Her eyes skimmed your coffee table, filled with pain killers, water and tea before she asked, "Have you eaten?"
You nodded and pointed to the empty bowl under the table. "I heated up some soup."
"Maybe you should call your doctor, are your periods usually this bad?" she asked before picking up the dirty dishes and heading to your sink.
"No," you groaned, rolling onto your back with a wince. "I'm on the pill. They're usually a breeze."
"Then you should definitely call," she said over her shoulder. "Can't hurt to get checked out."
"Yeah? With what health insurance?" you countered angrily as you forced yourself to sit up.
"Still no luck finding a job?"
You shook your head then sneezed, scowling at the roses nearby like it was their fault.
"Then use some of the fifty fucking thousand dollars he gave you and see a goddamn doctor!" she exclaimed after drying your bowl and putting it away. "I know you don't want to use it but it doesn't matter, he won't know either way."
Fifty grand. He had wired you fifty grand instead of twenty. You spent a week going back and forth with your bank, making them reject the funds over and over until you finally caved because you couldn't stand to waste any more time on the phone with them over it. You had decided you would donate it like he suggested, but you never figured out where. Between that and all the flowers he kept sending, you couldn't decide if you should be flattered or pissed off.
On that particular day, with your uterus trying to extract itself from your body, you chose to be pissed off.
As if on cue, your buzzer rang and you could have screamed at the top of your lungs, already knowing who it was. Celine got to the intercom first and pressed the button.
"Yeah?"
"Hey, it's Jim, got today's flowers."
You grabbed a pillow and screamed into it, deciding to give into your urge.
"Alright, buzzing you up."
You heard her press the other button and hold it a few seconds before unlocking your door and leaving it cracked.
"He's in love with you," she said matter-of-factly from the door.
"I'm going to fucking kill him," you replied, making her laugh.
A light tap on the door came a few minutes later and Celine pushed it open to greet Jim, an older man with a white beard that reminded you of Santa, before she signed for the flowers.
"Jim, don't you have someone you could give these to instead?" you asked from the couch. He shook his head and grinned before handing over the vase of peonies, dahlias and roses.
"You know I can't do that."
You made a face and collapsed into the back of your couch.
"Maybe if you just call him, it'll end," Jim offered, "although I don't mind. You're keeping the shop afloat at this point," he joked.
"That's exactly what he wants," you replied. He shrugged and gave you a wave with a see you tomorrow, then disappeared down the hall. Celine closed the door and looked around the room for a clear spot before giving up and setting them on the ground.
"Maybe flower guy was right. Maybe you should call him."
"He's just used to getting his way. He can pull this shit with anyone else but I'm not gonna give in," you told her while simultaneously picking up your phone, fingers tapping angrily at your screen. She grinned and found her spot back on the couch.
"What are you doing?"
"Texting Joel and telling him to knock it the fuck off," you growled.
Celine tipped her head back and laughed. "Same thing! You're talking to him! You're giving him exactly what he wants."
"Okay, so I'm not perfect! What else is new?" you snapped after shooting off a text to Joel that said stop with the fucking flowers, I mean it.
Before Celine could reply, your phone vibrated in your lap.
Does this mean you're willing to see me? Or should I switch to chocolate?
You frowned and Celine knowingly tilted her head to the side.
"Girl. Come on. Hear him out. Maybe if you just meet up once and let him talk, he'll stop. I've never seen a guy text back as quickly as him, and he's got an actual successful business to run! Do you have a magic pussy or something, what the hell did you do to this guy?"
You cracked a smile for the first time in days. You didn't go into much detail with her since you came back. She knew you slept together and she knew he broke your heart, but everything else remained a mystery. And because she knew you would tell her in your own time, she never asked.
"I just think he's not used to hearing the word no," you told her, ignoring his text and setting your phone down on your coffee table.
"Or he's madly in love with you and doesn't know how to handle it," she countered with a raised eyebrow.
You opened your mouth to object, to remind her for the fourth time that Joel didn't fall in love with anyone, when a sharp pain shot through your legs and you doubled over with a deep groan. Celine lunged forward to rub your upper back, her smile long gone when she saw how you badly you were struggling.
"That's it. I'm calling your doctor," she said, snatching your phone from the table to scroll through your contacts.
You took a deep breath in through your nose and out through your mouth, not bothering to stop her when she dialed the phone.
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You sat on the exam table, a loud and irritating white piece of paper separating your thighs from the padding as your doctor sat before you, gently explaining what was happening while a low ringing began to echo in your head.
Miscarriage... hCG levels... four or five weeks... bleeding will end soon.
You just sat there in complete shock, a dumbstruck look on your face as she continued to explain it was nothing you did or didn't do, that it's extremely common, that you would likely go on to have a perfectly healthy pregnancy if you wanted. Then she said your name softly and your eyes refocused onto her bright blue ones behind her wire rimmed glasses.
"Do you have any questions?" she asked with a comforting hand on your knee.
Those glasses didn't suit her face at all, they were too round. Why didn't anyone ever tell her?
"Uh," you croaked before clearing your throat. "I'm... I'm on the pill. How did this happen?"
"It's ninety nine percent effective but it's lower if you skip days or forget to take them at the same time. Did that happen last month at all?"
Last month. When you were on the island with Joel. It felt like a lifetime ago.
"Um, well, I was in Fiji last month," you began, fingers twisting anxiously in your lap. You still only had a pink paper gown to cover you after your exam. You felt so exposed and raw that your skin hurt.
"Did you account for the time change?" she asked. Your eyes fluttered shut and you dropped your chin to your chest.
"No." How stupid. Why didn't that occur to you? "I might have forgotten a day here and there, too. There was one weekend we were away and I forgot-" you stopped yourself and pinched the bridge of your nose. "Doesn't matter, I guess."
She patted your knee again and gave it a little squeeze.
"It's alright, you're going to be okay," she assured you. You nodded and swallowed thickly before looking back up.
"I know. I just... I thought if this ever happened..." you trailed off as you struggled to find the right words. "I thought I'd feel..." you couldn't finish your sentence but she seemed to understand anyway.
"It's completely normal. You didn't even know until it was already over. You're probably just in shock, it's a lot to take in," she said before kicking off the floor so her stool would roll over to the wall that held various pamphlets. She plucked a few from the hard plastic holders and held them out to you. "These will help explain more of what you're going through, but if you have any questions or if you're finding you need a little extra help to get through this, please give the office a call. We have a twenty four hour service, they'll connect me with you, day or night."
You thanked her softly and stared blankly at the pamphlets while she gathered her things before slipping out of the room, giving you some privacy to get dressed.
It was surreal, driving back home, burdened with this brand new knowledge, this thing you had no idea how to process. Shouldn't you be sad? Shouldn't you grieve the loss in some way? Maybe your doctor was right. Maybe you were in shock.
As you walked up to your building, a familiar olive green truck rumbled up to the curb, tapping out a light beep in greeting and shaking you out of your funk.
"Oh, hey," you said, smiling weakly at Jim when he jumped out with a wave.
"Good timing," he replied before climbing into the back of the truck to hand you a teddy bear with a little rose pinned to its chest. "He's switching it up," Jim said, smile falling when he saw the look on your face. "Hey, everything okay?"
You nodded quickly and reached for the pen to scribble your name. "Yeah, sorry, just tired."
He pressed his lips into a thin line before taking the pen back and giving you one last look.
"Well, get some rest, yeah? Need some help getting up to your place?"
"No, thank you, I'm good," you told him sincerely, then gave him a little wave before heading up the stairs to your building. He called out his usual see you tomorrow and you forced a smile before disappearing inside.
You supposed it was good you hadn't found a job yet. At least you could waste away in your bed until this strange feeling passed and you could process everything.
After you changed back into comfortable clothes with the plan to find some shitty movie to zone out to, you heard your doorbell buzz. With a confused frown, you shuffled back out into the living room, wondering who it could be. Jim had already dropped off Joel's daily gift and Celine had a key.
For one stupid, foolish moment you thought it might be Joel. Like he had somehow, from across the city and with absolutely no knowledge as to what was going on, found out about the miscarriage and came to scoop you into his arms and tell you everything would be okay.
The mere thought caused tears to sting your eyes and you quickly blinked them away, chalking it up to hormonal changes and the emotional morning.
"Yes?" you called weakly through the speaker.
A man's voice replied with your name posed as a question, followed by got a delivery here for you.
You buzzed him in and curiously craned your neck out into your hall, chewing your lower lip until the elevator dinged and a man dressed in an all brown uniform emerged carrying a large, flat, square package.
When he approached, he confirmed your name again before handing you something to sign, which you did blindly as your focus was still on the box at his feet.
"Where's it from?" you asked, stepping to the side so he could set it against your wall.
"Uh..." he trailed off, distracted momentarily by all the flowers, and then squinted at the paper you just signed. "Fiji Islands. That's pretty rad. Hope it's a vacation," he joked before tucking the clipboard under his arm and exiting back out into the hallway.
It took about ten seconds after he left for you to realize what it was, yet you still shakily opened the box, your palm cupping your mouth when the bubble wrap fell to the floor and Ellie's painting sat before you. You crumpled to the ground and squeezed your eyes shut, trying to block out the memories of pink seashells and stolen kisses and warm brown eyes and whispers of my girl. But it was staring you in the face. The painting that spoke to you before you even understood what it was saying, the painting Joel bought for you without a second thought, before you slept together, before it all fell apart.
Hot tears trickled down your face when you fumbled for your phone, your thumb hovering over the call button next to his name.
Just do it. Just call him. You wanted to hear his voice. You wanted him to hold you close and tell you it wasn't your fault. You wanted him to stay with you until the blood and the agony passed and everything from the past few hours became a horrible, distant memory.
Perhaps the shock was beginning to wear off.
At the last second, you scrolled up and tapped Celine's name instead. When she heard the broken sound of your voice, she dropped what she was doing to rush over, not even asking for details until you had stopped crying on her shoulder. You told her about your appointment. About the painting. About the seashells. About Brooks. About everything until your voice was raw and your face felt swollen and hot from crying.
She tucked you into bed and laid curled up next to you. She softly told you about her own miscarriage she had when she was nineteen. She told you the pain would go away, that the void inside would eventually fill again. But halfway through some movie she had found that mostly served as background noise, she turned to you and said the words you needed to hear. Like you were waiting for someone else's permission to give in.
"You gotta tell him, babe."
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You couldn't even remember how you got there, standing in front of his hotel five days later, body now mostly recovered and fueled by caffeine from the shop three blocks away. It felt like you were drawn to him, like you weren't even making your own decisions, telling yourself you were just going to take a short walk to enjoy the weather and clear your head after downing an iced coffee.
Certainly if you had known you would have been walking through the doors of his lobby, giving the same man from that first day in the same pristine black suit a nervous smile before making your way across the room, sneakers squeaking on the floor as you walked, you would have prepared a little better.
It was quiet. The concierge looked bored and tapped her pen on a pad of paper, chin resting in her fist as she pretended to work. Elevator cars silently whirred up and down on both sides of you, the glass walls allowing you a sneak peek at guests going up to their rooms.
You cleared your throat when you approached reception, your mouth opening to give them your name when a man's surprised voice said it for you.
Swiveling around, you locked eyes with a dark haired man wearing thick rimmed glasses and a black bow tie over his tight fitting white shirt and tailored pants. You gave him a small smile, but your confusion must have been obvious because he blinked and shook his head before stepping forward and offering you his hand.
"I'm Liam," he began, "Joel's assistant."
"Oh!" you exclaimed, shaking his hand while the gears slowly turned in your head. "Oh, so you're the one who bought all the clothes and stuff."
Liam grinned and nodded, dropping your hand so he could wrap both arms around the pad-folio pressed to his chest.
"I had pictures to work with when I was choosing colors. You know, so I could best compliment your hair and skin tone. I hope you liked everything."
"Yes! Oh, yes, everything was beautiful, thank you so much," you said hurriedly, then lowered your voice when you realized you were echoing. "Uh, is he in?"
Liam's shoulders sagged and he rolled his eyes dramatically.
"Yes, thank god," he breathed, waving you over to an elevator and pressing the button. "I was afraid you were just here picking something up. I'm so glad you want to see him, he's been -"
You frowned when Liam seemed to realize he was saying too much and he cut himself off, lips pursing as he stared at the unopened elevator.
"What?"
Liam shook his head and shrugged right when the doors slid open. He beckoned for you to enter first before following, pressing the pad of his finger into a scanner and tapping a button. Only when the doors shut did he turn back to you.
"He's been worse than usual. I think he's upset about whatever happened," he explained, then waved his hands in the air and added, "I mean, he didn't tell me anything, but I'm assuming something happened because he's picking out flowers every single morning and asking me to have them delivered."
"He's been picking them out?" you repeated.
Liam just nodded. "It's none of my business, but he's never had me do this for anyone before. And I've worked for him for ten years," he said dramatically, raising his thick eyebrows at you knowingly.
"Oh," you said softly, dropping your gaze to the floor.
The elevator chimed and the doors slid open, leading you out into the same hallway you walked down over two months ago when you first met. Butterflies instantly bloomed in your stomach as you followed behind Liam, keeping your gaze low while you tried to regulate your breathing. You had no idea how you were going to tell him, no rehearsed speech, nothing.
"He's in a meeting right now, but it'll be over in," Liam glanced at his watch, "twenty minutes. I'll take you to his office and let him know you're here when he's done."
You nodded and turned the corner, Joel's office already in view when you walked by the executive conference room. It looked the same as it did in your memory, the wall that bordered the hallway made of glass and inside, a long table with high back leather chairs. Only this time, people were inside having what appeared to be a very important meeting. Men and women in suits filled the table. Papers, mugs of coffee and laptops were scattered everywhere. The flat screen televisions projected extremely big numbers connected to various cities, presumably the locations of The Parador, but what made you stumble was seeing Joel at the head of the table.
His black tie was loosened around his neck, suit coat draped over the back of his chair as he stared at the screen, then his phone, gaze bouncing back and forth while next to him, a sweaty looking man gripping a laptop with one flat, shaky hand, spoke about the numbers.
You unconsciously slowed, unable to tear your eyes away when Joel stood up. His gaze was pinned to something on his phone, which now rested on the table. He was still listening to the man on his left but the more he spoke, the angrier Joel looked. You saw his nostrils flare and his jaw set while he rolled up the sleeves of his shirt, the irritation rolling off his tight shoulders until he finally snapped.
Their voices were muffled, but you probably wouldn't have been able to understand what they were talking about, anyway. Joel's brows were knit together, lips curled into a sneer as he spoke loudly enough to the group for you to hear the deep timber of his voice from where you stood in the hall.
Liam didn't say a word, allowing you to come to a standstill and watch Joel with a sly smirk from a few feet away.
You couldn't explain the feeling you had as you watched him, never before seeing him at work with your own two eyes. You knew he was important, obviously, but there was just something about the way he commanded the room, the way full grown men practically cowered when he began to pace around, his finger pointing at the sweaty man and then the screen. It made your heart race and your lips part as your breathing grew shallow, like you were in a trance.
And then Joel spun around, his eyes locking on yours through the glass like he suddenly sensed your presence, and the room went silent. His back instantly straightened and his brows relaxed and then a moment later he was storming towards the glass door.
"Joel?" you heard one of the men at the table call out when the door flung open.
"We're done, meeting's over," he tossed back over his shoulder. If you could have looked away from him, you would have seen the relieved look on all their faces as they began to hastily gather their things.
He stalked up to you, slowing to a stop when he was a couple feet away, then scanned you up and down, like he couldn't believe his eyes.
Neither of you spoke. You just stared at one another, hearts thundering wildly in your chests.
"Hey," he finally breathed, afraid if he spoke any louder he might scare you off.
"Hi," you replied timidly. Your gaze flickered around to Liam, to other people pretending to work within earshot, and to the people filing out of the conference room before meeting his eye again.
He finally snapped out of it and held out an arm, ushering you towards the direction of his office.
"C'mon," was all he said, and you quickly scurried down the hall with Joel hot on your heels.
"Can I get you anything? Coffee, water, tea?" Liam called. You could hear the smile in his voice before you turned around and said, "Water would be nice."
"I got water in here," Joel said gruffly, his hand gently grazing your lower back. He turned around to Liam and said, "No interruptions," before closing the door behind you both.
You looked around his office, everything just how you remembered it. Massive mahogany desk, dark green couch and chair near the well stocked bar, the entire room surrounded by bookshelves, awards, and various decor items, but no picture frames. How didn't you notice that before?
"Have a seat," Joel said, sliding past to get you ice water from the bar. You sunk down into the green couch, feeling just as nervous as the last time you were there.
"Thank you," you said when he placed the glass on a coaster. He nodded and seemed to take a moment before deciding to sit in the chair, giving you your space.
"I'm glad you came," he said, leaning forward with his elbows resting on his knees. Your eyes dropped to your shoes. Your dirty sneakers pressing into his expensive carpet and your frayed jeans... you couldn't even remember the last time they were washed.
"Yeah," you replied, voice sounding nothing like your own. You reached for your water and took a sip before carefully setting it down, fearful of even one drop landing on the rug or table. "I'm sorry. You were in a meeting, I would have waited."
"Fuck 'em," he said, and your eyes rose to find his. God, they looked so soft and kind, the way the sunlight hit them took your breath away. "Would rather talk to you than any of 'em," he added with a little smile.
"I got the painting," you told him. "It's beautiful, thank you," you added warmly, then frowned a bit when he excitedly stood to hurry behind his desk.
"That reminds me, I got somethin' else for you."
"Oh, Joel, please don't tell me it's more flowers," you begged, and he laughed lightly before bringing over a small black shopping bag. There was a designer label stamped on the side and you frowned.
"It ain't that - just open it," he insisted, handing you the bag before sitting back down on the edge of his seat.
Hesitantly, you peered inside, and what awaited you tore your heart in two.
"Joel..."
He smiled. He couldn't help himself.
"Was gonna leave it by your door or somethin' later," he said, his brown eyes sparkling as you lifted one of many pink seashells out of the bag to get a closer look.
"When did you -"
"Had to go back for a couple days and sign some paperwork," he explained. Your eyebrows pulled together and tears welled in your eyes as you stared down at the beautiful seashells he had collected, all for you.
"Thank you," you whispered, gingerly setting it back into the bag and placing it at your feet.
"You're welcome," he replied, his soft tone matching yours.
Alright. It was now or never.
You took a deep breath, rubbing your palms anxiously over the tops of your thighs, but before you could get a word out, he spoke again.
"I wanna tell you everythin'," he said. All the air left your lungs and you swallowed tightly. "I mean it. I'll tell you everythin', and not 'cause you want me to, 'cause I want to. I've been doin' alotta thinkin', and -"
"Joel," you interrupted. He scratched his eyebrow with his thumb and shook his head.
"Just hear me out."
"No, Joel, I need to tell you something," you said. He must have heard something change in your voice because he stopped talking. He searched your face for any indication of what was to come, but of course came up empty.
"Okay," he said slowly. He watched your fingers fidget nervously in your lap and suddenly you couldn't make eye contact with him anymore.
"I don't really know how to say this," you began.
Oh fuck, you've met someone else, was his first thought.
"I, uh," then you squeezed your eyes shut and pressed your lips into a tight line and panic seized his throat.
Something was wrong.
"It's okay," he said soothingly. He tried to inch forward but if he moved any more he would fall off the damn chair. "Go ahead, darlin'. What's goin' on?"
One single tear slid down your cheek and he swore he stopped breathing when you said the words I had a miscarriage.
"What?" he whispered, pain and confusion clouding his face.
You opened your eyes and forced yourself to look at him.
"I had a miscarriage and I just thought you had a right to know."
Your voice trembled and cracked as you forced the words out and he couldn't hold back any longer. He stood and rushed to your side, just like you always knew he would, just like you wanted. He enveloped you in his arms and pressed his lips against the top of your head. He rocked you back and forth, strong arms curled around your midsection, and you melted. You melted into him and didn't even try to fight it. For the past week, hell, for the past month, it was all you wanted.
"When?" he choked out. You circled your arms around him and your legs were suddenly pulled across his lap. He smelled so good, like that cologne you never could identify but was so distinctly him. You dragged in a deep breath, unaware of the tears streaming down your cheeks.
"About a week ago."
Joel's grip around you tightened.
"You shoulda called me, baby. I woulda been there."
"I know," you sniffled. You rubbed the back of your hand under your nose and tried to breathe deep. "I know. But I didn't know it even happened until I went to the doctor."
You told him the whole story. Told him how you thought it was a bad period, how Celine called your doctor, how she explained what likely happened and that it was your own stupid fucking fault for messing up your pill.
"It ain't your fault," he told you, his voice reverberating in his chest. You closed your eyes and leaned into him, fingers grappling at the fabric of his shirt.
"You're not mad?" you whimpered.
"Baby, please," he begged, "'Course I ain't mad. Don't go carryin' this 'round. Don't carry that guilt. If it was meant to be, it would be, alright?"
Your tears flowed, then, unstoppable as they barreled down your cheeks. Your sobs could probably be heard from the other side of the door but you didn't care. Joel continued to hold you, cradle you, and hum soothingly against the top of your head until your tears slowed and your breath grew ragged.
"Are you okay?" he asked after you quieted down. His hand was flat against your back, rubbing wide circles as you continued to cling to him.
"Yeah, I think so," you said truthfully. "I just didn't expect it and then with the hormone change, it all kind of hit me at once, you know?"
"Yeah," he answered, "yeah, I get it. Is there anythin' I can do? Anythin' you need?"
You shook your head, biting down hard on your lip so you didn't say I just need you.
It seemed as though maybe he read your mind, or maybe he really had been giving things alot of thought because the next thing he said was, "I wanna do this right."
You felt the next wave of tears coming so you burrowed further into him, pressing your face against his neck, breathing him in and letting him slowly put you back together with each comforting stroke of his hand.
"Lemme do this right, sweetheart, please. Tell me how to fix it."
You didn't have the answer. Your eyes were dry and burning from all the tears you had just spilled and you felt completely drained. Every muscle in your body felt weak and useless, the last thing you wanted to do was think.
You continued to sit in silence, the only sound coming from the gold mantle clock slowly ticking away the seconds and some very faint murmuring when groups of people would walk by Joel's office. You closed your eyes, encased in his warmth, and let your mind drift back to everything that went wrong, wondering how you would do things differently if you could go back in time. Then you remembered something Joel had said on the plane and your eyes snapped open.
"What if we started over?"
His thumb, which was drawing slow, comforting circles over your arm, paused.
"You'd - yeah," he agreed, sounding a little breathless, "yeah, I think that's a good idea."
You sat up, untangling yourself from him so you could sit properly on the couch. You pulled your legs from his lap and tucked them underneath you before sticking out your hand and reintroducing yourself with a shaky smile.
He gave you a little grin before taking your hand in his, eyes glistening when he said, "Joel Miller."
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It was impossible to keep the smile from your face when you heard the buzzer, followed by Joel's deep voice letting you know he was there to pick you up for your date.
Your "first" date.
With a skip in your step, you trotted to the elevator, tapped your foot impatiently all the way down, and practically ran out into the lobby with excitement. You caught yourself at the last second, making sure you looked more collected and cool than you really felt before pushing open the front doors.
And there he stood, in all his glory, at the bottom of your building's stone steps. His hands were in the pockets of his expensive black suit, and he grinned when he saw you for the first time, a stark contrast from the last time you each stood in those spots.
"You look beautiful," he murmured when you got closer, eyes dropping appreciatively to take in the light blue floral dress you chose, then bent over to plant a kiss on your cheek. The way his scruff tickled your skin had a wave of goosebumps flashing over your arms, making you shiver.
"Thank you," you said, scooting into the backseat of his car when he held the door open for you.
"Hi, Richie."
"Hey, honey," he replied with a smile and wink in the review mirror.
Joel rounded the back of the car and slipped in beside you, then gave Richie a nod to start driving.
"Wait, where are we going?" you asked as you buckled your seatbelt.
"Got a reservation at this French restaurant that just opened up. Supposed to be impossible to get in but, well..." he smirked a little and shrugged, letting his sentence trail off.
"Uh, I was actually thinking of something else."
Joel gave you a curious look. "Like what?"
"Like... maybe getting pizza at Sal's and then catching the 9:45 showing of Shadow Strike?" you offered with a cheesy smile. Joel laughed, eyes crinkling as he tipped his head back. Seeing him so relaxed and happy was truly a sight to behold.
"Anythin' you want," he replied, then leaned forward. "Hear that, Richie?"
"Yes, sir."
Joel patted the headrest twice and sat back, brown eyes dancing when they found you again.
"Hole in the wall pizza joint and a movie theater? I'm gonna regret wearin' these shoes, ain't I?"
You looked down at the shiny, black leather and giggled.
"How much were they?"
"Seven hundred."
"Oh, yeah, you'll definitely regret it."
The floors at Sal's left little to be desired, for sure, but the pizza was undeniably the best in town. One bite had Joel forgetting all about the stained laminate flooring.
"Right?" you asked excitedly when his eyebrows raised in surprise.
He only nodded, his mouth full until he swallowed and said, "Didn't think there was any decent pizza out here. Reminds me of New York pizza," before taking another large bite.
You giggled and leaned across the high top table to grab the shaker of parmesan cheese.
"I'll have to take your word for it, I've never been."
"You've never been to New York?" he echoed incredulously, and you shook you head as you took another bite. Joel gave you a fake look of disappointment before saying, "I'll have to take you with me next time."
"Do you go often?" you asked, tucking away the idea of traveling again with Joel for later.
"Yeah, 'sides the hotel out here, New York's my biggest source of revenue."
"For now, right?" you countered. He grinned and wiped the corner of his mouth with a thin paper napkin.
"We're a long ways off from openin' in Fiji, but, yeah, that one's projected to make the most."
You nodded, both falling into a comfortable silence while you finished your food.
"Alright," Joel said after balling up his napkins and tossing them onto his greasy paper plate. "Where're you from?"
You laughed and felt your cheeks warm when you replied, "You already know that."
"It's our first date," he reminded you with an adorable smile. His forearms were crossed and resting on the tabletop. He leaned forward like he was sharing a secret, completely oblivious to the looks he was getting when other customers saw him in his sharp, black suit, completely out of place for the setting.
"Okay, I'll play," you decided, leaning forward to mimic his posture. "I'm from Tennessee."
"And what brought you all the way out here?"
You laughed and said, "College."
"You lose your accent or did you never have one?" he asked.
"Uh, I might've had a small accent when I first moved, but I'm afraid it's long gone now. Not like yours," you pointed out.
When you first met, Joel refused to share anything about himself. You were delighted to find out that had changed.
"Grew up in Texas. Whenever I feel it fadin', I know it's time to go back for a visit," he joked, watching your eyes light up when he freely shared something about himself.
"W-where in Texas?" you stammered. You were still unsure of how much he was willing to share, so you figured you would keep your questions to a minimum. But once again, he shocked you.
"Austin. Parents are still out there somewhere. Little brother, too, pretty sure."
"Oh," you replied softly. You grew nervous at the mention of his brother, remembering how the last time he was brought up didn't go so well, so you chose to leave the topic alone and instead focused on his parents.
"Are you close with your mom and dad?"
Joel shrugged, appearing calm on the outside but he could feel his heart pumping faster and his foot began to tap anxiously. If it weren't for the noisy, sticky floor giving him away, you may not have noticed, but you did.
He was nervous, but he was still trying.
You reached out to gently squeeze his arm, making him smile.
"We don't have to," you whispered. We can go slow, it's okay.
"Not as close as I used to be," he said, ignoring the out you gave and allowing the words to tumble out of him all at once. "Y'know how families are. Stupid fights 'n all that."
You nodded vigorously in agreement. "Same with me. Well, I never got along great with my parents. I was always looking for a reason to leave. I applied to schools as far away from home as possible, then me and my best friend both got into UC and it was a no brainer."
Joel looked relieved when you pulled the focus back onto yourself. His shoulders relaxed a bit and he leaned forward.
"The friend you were tellin' me 'bout?" he asked, letting you fill in the rest of the sentence. The one who called the doctor.
"Celine," you offered, "yeah. We've been friends forever."
On the way back to his car, you told him a story from when you and Celine were in high school. Back when you were underage and dumb and drank too much at a house party to impress a boy and you ended up vomiting into some boxwoods while Celine held your hair back.
"The neighbor boy?" Joel guessed.
"You remembered," you said, sounding impressed. He gave you a knowing look, lips pulling into half a smirk, like he were saying of course I remembered.
"Well, yeah. The very same," you confirmed with a deep breath. You fidgeted with the skirt of your dress, trying to hide the sudden wave of shyness that washed over you. Even though you had history, that night somehow really did feel like a first date.
Joel took your hand when you stepped out of the car and he led you into the movie theater, only letting you go when he needed both hands to pay for your tickets.
"I had my first kiss in a movie theater," Joel said as he stood in line beside you for popcorn. You tilted your head to look at him, excited once again he was sharing something personal about himself.
"What movie was it?"
"Indiana Jones," he replied without hesitation. Then you laughed when he added, "I was so nervous the whole time, barely saw a minute of it. Kept psychin' myself up to make a move and couldn't think 'bout anythin' else."
"I can't imagine you nervous," you teased, then right before the clerk called you up to the counter, you locked eyes.
"You make me nervous all the time."
You blinked, stunned by his sudden vulnerability, and then a second later he was at the counter ordering.
"C'mon, don't wanna miss the beginning," he said as he handed you your drink and motioned towards the theaters, completely unperturbed.
When you picked the movie, you figured a standard action flick would be pretty safe. You steered clear of anything romantic, not wanting to inadvertently draw parallels to your own relationship, and you even avoided horror because you had a tendency to cling to the person you're with out of fear. Yet somehow you still found yourself inching closer to him.
At first, you crossed your legs and your foot grazed his knee. Purely accidental. You even apologized and shifted a bit to create more space. But then you kept leaning on the armrest between you and your head tilted to rest between both seats. You wanted to blame it on the fact that he held the popcorn bucket, but he was kind enough to move it closer so you wouldn't have to reach so far.
Around the halfway point of the movie, his hand found your knee. If you recalled correctly, it was during one of the rare funny parts of the movie and you both had leaned forward to laugh. His hand grabbed you for support and just kind of... stayed there.
After that, you had trouble following the plot.
"Wait... who is he again?" you whispered. Joel's fingers flexed on your knee when he leaned over and you were eternally grateful the dark room hid how flustered it made you.
"The marine? He's the brother from earlier."
"Oh, right," you replied, and you must not have sounded very convincing because he gave you a look and you giggled, slapping your palm over your mouth when the people a couple rows ahead of you turned around.
Joel grinned and remained where he was instead of straightening back up.
A few more minutes went by. You pretended to watch the movie but he was too distracting, being that close. Your gaze kept drifting off the screen and down to his hand, then from his hand up to his face, admiring the way the light from the film played across his perfect side profile.
He felt your eyes on him and he turned his head, still smiling when he asked, "You alright?"
"Mhmm," you hummed with a vigorous nod. Then you found yourself leaning a little closer and his gaze flickered from your eyes to your lips, then back to your eyes again.
It wasn't your fault. He looked so ridiculous and handsome in his expensive suit eating buttery popcorn in an old movie theater. You simply couldn't help yourself. You both inched forward at the same time and gently pressed your lips together. At first, it was timid and sweet and sent a spark down your spine. It felt so nice to kiss him again after so long and after everything that happened, you easily lost yourself in him.
Too easily.
By the time the credits rolled and the dim lights slowly turned back on, you had both hands buried in his hair and his tongue halfway down your throat. When you realized that people could see you, you hurriedly pulled apart at the exact same time. Joel's hand, which had once been on your knee and had since traveled up the skirt of your dress, gave your thigh a little squeeze before begrudgingly untangling himself from you.
"Maybe we should go," you said, giving him a shy glance after fixing yourself up a bit.
"Yeah, just... gimme a minute," he replied, his eyes rolling to stare at the ceiling as he took a few deep, focused breaths. The theater was almost empty and you were about to ask what was wrong when you noticed the bulge in his pants. Heat flooded your face and you looked away to hide your laughter, but he caught you.
"Oh, you think it's funny?" he asked. He tried to sound serious but he couldn't keep the smile from his face.
"A little," you admitted when you looked back at him. He grinned and finally stood up with a groan, tugging his suit coat closed before reaching for your hand.
"I'll remember that," he warned as he led you down the steps and back out into the lobby.
Once you were settled in his car with Richie driving through the dark, quiet streets back towards your apartment, you turned to Joel and asked, "Better than Indiana Jones?"
"Oh, no contest, baby," he murmured with a sly smile.
You giggled and let his fingers thread through yours on top of the seat. Your cheeks ached from how much you laughed and smiled that night. Admittedly, you had your doubts you would be able to really start over after everything that happened, but things felt so different now. In large part, that had to do with Joel and how much he was trying. He pushed himself to open up to you a little bit, despite his uneasiness, and he had no problem agreeing to a normal first date at the last minute.
He was really trying, and he was doing it for you.
"I got it, Richie," Joel said when the car pulled up to your curb and the driver had moved to unbuckle his belt. He gave Joel a nod in the review mirror and stayed put as Joel swung his door open to step outside. Then his eyes shifted to yours and he smiled.
"Have a good night, honey."
"Thanks, Richie, you too," you said warmly just as Joel opened your door.
He held out his hand and you took it, steadying yourself to stand, and gave him a grateful smile right when he pushed the door shut. Wrapping your arms around the crook of his elbow, he led you up the steps to the front door of your building, only letting you go to search for your keys.
"Well, thank you," you said, sounding a little more breathless than you intended, but Joel seemed to like it because his brown eyes sparkled and his mouth twitched when he heard the desire laced in your voice. "I had a great time."
"Me, too," he murmured as he casually leaned against the doorframe, playfully cocking his head to the side as he sized you up and down. "Y'know, I've never seen your place," he said innocently, but when your jaw dropped in mock offense and you gave his shoulder a gentle push, he threw his head back and laughed.
"Excuse me, I don't put out on the first date," you joked, unable to stop yourself from smiling.
"No, 'course not. Was just pointin' out a fact, is all," Joel replied with a matching grin of his own.
"Oh, is that all?" you echoed, leaning forward and wrapping his tie around your fist, then giving it a gentle tug so he would meet you halfway.
"Yeah," he whispered right before your mouths found each other once again. You could still taste the salt and butter from the popcorn on his lips as he crowded you against the door, both his hands flying up to cup each side of your face, cradling it gently while his lips massaged yours. There was just something about him that always had you melting into a puddle at his feet, and that evening was no exception. You had to tear yourself away with a soft laugh before you broke your rule and invited him upstairs.
"Can we do this again?" he asked as you slid your key into the door. You pushed it open and stepped inside, turning back to face him.
"I would love that."
Joel grinned and promised he would call before you waved goodnight and disappeared into the lobby.
When your elevator opened up on your floor, you hurried to your apartment, exhausted but giddy with excitement at how perfect the date went. You flicked on your lights and locked your door before kicking your heels off and throwing your purse onto the couch, but not before digging out your phone to taken with you as you got changed and ready for bed.
You had just finished brushing your teeth, not ten minutes after he left, when your phone rang. Your heart fluttered in your chest when you saw his name, and you slipped between your bedsheets before answering.
"Hello?"
"Hey."
You could hear the road noise in the background when you asked, "Did you forget something?"
"Nope. Just said I would call."
You laughed and pulled your blankets up around your chin.
"I thought that meant maybe tomorrow."
"Miss you, didn't wanna wait," he answered immediately. You bit your lower lip and even though he couldn't see you, you pressed your palm over your cheeks when you felt them grow hot.
"I miss you, too," you whispered.
After a beat of silence where you were each smiling like fools for no one to see, he spoke again.
"What do you wanna do for our next date?"
"Hmm," you tapped your chin thoughtfully for a moment. "How about you pick the next one since I picked this one? We can take turns."
You heard his deep chuckle on the other end and you grinned.
"I like it. You're on."
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You figured Joel would pick something a little fancier than you, but you weren't expecting him to propose a date to the opera for your fourth date. It was a far cry from the shitty little dive bar around the corner that had a really fun trivia night you dragged him to a few days before.
Joel! I don't have anything to wear to the opera!
I kept all your clothes. I'll have Liam drop off some things before EOD.
Before you even had a chance to process the fact Joel had kept everything from your trip to Fiji and what that could possibly mean, your phone pinged with another text.
Told you you should've kept them
You grinned and shook your head.
And I told *you* I don't have the room
When are you gonna let me see this tiny apartment of yours?
You glanced around your living room, the space was cozy but definitely not spacious. It was hard to even imagine Joel there. Would he even like it? He was definitely used to a very different lifestyle than you. You were nervously chewing your nail, lost in thought, when your phone pinged again.
Sorry, not trying to pressure you, that's not what I meant
Shit, you took too long to answer and had him second guessing himself.
I know lol I was just reading an email - sorry
It wasn't entirely untrue. Your laptop sat open on your coffee table, your email program sitting before you.
Any luck on the job front?
No... not yet. Fortunately I have a handsome benefactor paying my rent for the next two months ;)
Your handsome benefactor would really like it if you let him help you find a job, baby
You rolled your eyes and sighed before typing out, don't you have a company to run?
I can do two things at once
You laughed to yourself and leaned back into your couch, staring at your phone longingly.
Since your first date with Joel, you had spoken every single day, approximately two weeks. What surprised you the most was the constant stream of texts he sent you throughout the day. You saw how he was in Fiji, you knew he was busy and had meetings and calls around the clock. How on earth he managed to do both still astounded you.
Because he was really trying, a little voice in the back of your head piped up.
He really did seem like a completely different man from the one you first met. Traces of him were still there: he hadn't yet come clean about his daughter or brother, but every time you saw each other, he made a point of sharing something new about himself. He told you a handful of stories from when he was younger, living in Texas. He told you his brother was a contractor but that was the only thing you knew about him. And that was okay. You wanted him to tell you about himself on his own terms, without feeling pressured, and that was exactly what he was doing.
Well I need to shower and figure out what to do with my hair for tonight. Unfortunately my phone's not waterproof so I guess I'll just see you later?
Looking forward to it - I'll let you know when to expect Liam
Like he promised, Liam arrived around four in the afternoon with an armful of dresses draped over one arm and a bag of shoes in the other.
"Oh, god, here - lemme help you," you said when you saw how much he was carrying from the elevator. He shot you a relieved smile when you grabbed a few things from his arms and helped him inside your apartment. He took one quick glance around and said, "Cute," before laying the dresses out on your couch and unzipping the bags.
"Alright. I brought a few pieces I thought would work best. You're free to do whatever, of course, but I would recommend the Chanel dress with the Valentino shoes."
Your eyes darted around at the items suddenly taking up all of the space in your living room and tried not to look completely out of your depth, but he must have been able to tell because he snatched up both items and handed them to you.
"Oh, thanks," you told him. The Chanel dress was a slinky black number you never had a chance to wear on the island, and the shoes were strappy heels you thought you wore once to a dinner with Zoe.
"Have you seen La Traviata before?" Liam asked. You chuckled and shook your head.
"I've never even been to the opera before."
Liam smiled and clapped his hands together gleefully. "Oh, you'll have such a great time! This is a great one to see. Especially from the box. You'll be able to see everything and won't have to dodge horrible hairdos or top hats."
"B-box? Joel's got box seats?" you stammered. He laughed and began to open a small toiletry bag filled with jewelry.
"Of course he does."
Liam held up a few necklaces before settling on a thin chain of diamonds and setting it aside. He then dug out matching earrings and a bracelet while he asked, "What are you planning to do with your hair?"
You had washed and dried it but otherwise, you hadn't gotten further than that.
"Uh, just wear it down, I guess."
Liam straightened up and gave you a once over. "Want some help?"
Relief flooded your veins and you quickly nodded. "Do you mind?"
He smiled and shook his head before flapping his hands, ushering you towards your bathroom.
"Not at all. Let's see what you're working with."
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"Jesus, you look beautiful," Joel murmured for the fourth time since he picked you up. He had one arm wrapped tightly around your middle, pulling you close to his side as you weaved through the lobby of the opera house. You owed it all to Liam. He was a lifesaver. He picked out your outfit and helped curl your hair where you couldn't reach it, keeping you distracted while he told you about his boyfriend's parents and their lavish home in Malibu.
"Thank you," you replied softly, looking him up and down in his sharp, black tuxedo before reminding him how good he looked, too.
"You wanna get a drink before it starts? We got 'bout ten minutes," he said, looking quickly at his watch before catching your eye.
"Uh, no, thanks. I'm good," you replied, looking past him to admire the ornate architecture. "Do you come to the opera often?"
"Not as much as I like," he told you while leading you towards a flight of carpeted stairs in the corner of the room. "Don't usually have many dates," he added with a little smirk. You smiled back, heart fluttering a little in your chest at how relaxed and happy he seemed.
He had been so good about opening up lately, you decided to test the waters and see how he would react.
"When was your last relationship?"
He faltered for just a quick moment when he reached out to pull back the red velvet curtain that led to your box seats, but he recovered nicely.
"You mean a real relationship?" he asked, and you nodded. He pulled out your chair and you swept the skirt of your dress underneath you before sitting down and thanking him.
"Well, that woulda been with Sarah's mom."
Your eyebrows shot up in surprise and you twisted in your seat to look at him. He was fixing his suit coat, looking down as his fingers nervously fidgeted with the buttons while he spoke.
"Was a long time ago. Sarah's fifteen now," he added, clearing his throat before locking eyes with you.
You swallowed and nodded before forcing yourself to reply, trying not to look too eager to hear more.
"That's a long time."
"Explains why I'm so rusty," he joked, cracking a little smile which you quickly reciprocated.
"You're not as rusty as you think," you teased. "I've been having a really great time the past couple weeks."
His smile softened and he instinctively found your hand, his thumb rubbing over your knuckles.
"Me, too," he murmured, dark eyes sparkling in the dim lighting from the chandeliers hanging over the auditorium.
His hand rarely left yours the entire three hours. The brief moments where the audience was expected to clap were the only exception, and then his hand immediately fell to yours once again. There was something so sweet and tender about the gesture, it made your chest squeeze and had you wishing you could curl into his side and wrap yourself around him.
What was wonderful was he didn't expect anything from you in these two short weeks, but then again, he never really did. Not in the way you were thinking, anyway. But that particular evening, you couldn't stop yourself from thinking about it. It might have been the heart-wrenchingly beautiful arias, or his thick fingers laced between yours, or how fucking good he looked in his tux, but whatever it was, it was driving you crazy. During the final hour of the performance, you were trying not to squirm in your seat too much and distract him because it truly was a beautiful opera, and you enjoyed it much more than you expected, but your close proximity and constant contact had your body reacting in ways that were not appropriate for the setting.
Even in the car on the way back to your apartment, you struggled to carry on a simple fucking conversation with him, allowing Joel to do most of the talking as he described his favorite parts while your eyes subtly darted between him and Richie, wishing more than ever that Joel would use that goddamn partition you knew the car had but he never seemed to utilize.
The three dates you've had before all ended the same way. Richie had figured out by now that Joel preferred to open your door himself, so he remained seated after giving you a quick good night over his shoulder while Joel slid out of the car to walk you up. He would kiss you, tell you what a fun time he had, maybe offer up a suggestion for your next date and probably give you a flirty little joke or comment before kissing you one last time with the promise to call.
This time, you only let him get to the first kiss before you whispered against his lips, "Do you want to come up and finally see my apartment?"
He pulled back like he had been electrocuted and you stifled a giggle at the serious look on his face. You could practically see the gears in his head turning as he tried to formulate a response.
"Or, you know, you could see it another time if you're tired," you added, hiding your smirk when you turned to unlock your front door.
"N-no, that's - y'sure?" he asked from over your shoulder. You pushed open the door and took one step inside before turning back around. Dragging your gaze up and down his body, you looked him dead in the eye when you said, "Absolutely."
Joel waved Richie off when you turned to drag him into your building, praying the ancient elevator wouldn't take forever like it normally did. You were in luck: it opened right away for once, and you quickly stepped inside before repeatedly jabbing the button for your floor. Joel chuckled behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist when the doors closed.
"That excited to show me your place, hm?" he murmured, his lips brushing over your bare shoulder. You leaned back into his chest, head lolling to the side and eyelids fluttering when his prickly mustache tickled your neck.
"Mhmm," you hummed, then bravely added, "especially my bedroom."
He groaned and gently bit at the skin behind your ear, teeth grazing over a tender spot, making you shudder.
"C'mon," you muttered once the doors slid open, grabbing his hand and hauling him down the hall towards your apartment. When you turned the corner, your eyes widened in surprise when you almost ran into your neighbor.
"Oh! Mrs. Adams! Hi... s-sorry," you stammered at the elderly woman wrapped in her robe with her tiny white dog cradled in her arms.
"Ma'am," Joel said with a friendly nod.
She said your name in greeting, then gave Joel a suspicious look over her shoulder before disappearing inside your abandoned elevator. You giggled and knocked your door open with your hip, pulling him inside and locking the door while flicking on your lights.
With one hand on your lower back, he looked around your meager apartment, standing in the middle of your living room slash kitchen in his tuxedo looking more out of place than you could have ever imagined, but it didn't bother you. Turned out, you liked seeing him in your space. You wanted to have memories of him sitting on your couch or eating at your table or taking a shower in your bathroom.
"I like it," he said, eyes still darting around to take in every little thing. Then he spotted some framed photographs on your entertainment center and he took a step forward.
"Can we look at those later?" you asked, tugging him back. He grinned and nodded before cupping your jaw and placing a tender kiss against your lips.
"You got somethin' else in mind?" he teased, but you just nodded earnestly and began to tug at his tie. He chuckled and watched you yank it from around his neck, dropping it on your floor before beginning to undo his buttons.
His hands fell to your sides, running up and down and plucking at the slinky fabric of your dress while you undid half the buttons of his crisp white shirt. Pleased to find he wasn't wearing an undershirt, you lunged forward and started to leave a trail of wet kisses leading from the center of his chest all the way up to the corner of his mouth.
"Missed you," he breathed, letting his eyes fall closed while you worked on sucking a bruise into his neck. Your fingers worked faster now, tugging the shirt from his dress pants and fumbling with the remaining buttons.
"Me, too," you whispered, lips still nipping at his skin, tongue darting out to press against his pulse. His shirt finally fell open and your nails lightly dragged down his chest when you added, "Need you. Please, Joel... kiss me."
You didn't need to ask twice.
His mouth collided with yours, all messy and urgent, and he began to walk you backwards towards the open door of your bedroom. He deftly worked the zipper on the back of your dress, pulling it down as he walked, mouth still seared across yours.
When you stepped through the threshold, your heels transitioning from hardwood to carpet, you blindly flung a hand out and flicked a light switch. In the corner of your room, a floor lamp turned on, casting you both in a soft glow when Joel finally pushed you down onto your bed.
His eyes, dark and filled with desire, dragged up and down your body while he unbuttoned his cuffs and shrugged off his shirt. Your dress was unzipped but still hung from your shoulders as you watched him slowly work his belt with bated breath.
"I like your room," he told you, tone casual like he wasn't taking off his pants and palming his cock through his boxers.
"Thanks," you laughed as you began to squirm out of your dress. He grinned and grabbed a heel in each hand before sliding them off and tossing them into a corner. "I can't imagine the kind of bedroom you have. Probably as big as the entire floor of this building."
"You'll have to come over and see," Joel said, eyes glued to your dress when it slid to the floor. He knelt on the edge of your mattress, old bed squeaking under his weight, then fell forward to hover above you.
He traced a finger along your jaw, mesmerized for a moment as he admired you up close. When he heard your breathing stutter under the scrutiny, his gaze flickered up to yours and he pinched your chin.
"I'm sorry," he said softly. "For everythin'. For every time I pushed you away 'n every time I made you cry."
The sudden shift in mood stunned you for a second and he took the opportunity to press his lips firmly against yours, tethering you together for just a moment before pulling away.
"Thank you for givin' me another chance," he whispered, closing his eyes and nudging his nose gently against yours. "I won't fuck this up again, baby, I promise."
"You better fucking not," you sniffled, then wrapped your arms loosely around his neck to pull him into another deep kiss so he wouldn't see your eyes grow watery.
"There's my girl," he chuckled at your sass when he broke away to pepper kisses along your jaw. My girl. Hearing those words shot a bolt of arousal through you and your hips began to subtly rock upwards, seeking out some friction to soothe the ache between your legs.
"Want me to take care of you?" he murmured into your skin. "Want me to make you feel good, baby?"
"Yeah," you whined, hips bucking upwards to chase his hand that dropped between your thighs, fingers teasing at your seam through your soaked panties. Then he hooked the fabric to the side, his mouth finding yours right when he slid two thick fingers inside you, swallowing down your gasp and groaning at the sharp bite of pain from your nails digging into his shoulders.
"Shit," you whispered when he began to plunge them in and out, curling and flexing his fingers inside your wet walls, soaked from the arousal building since you first saw him in his tuxedo when he picked you up.
Joel hummed, relishing in the familiar feel around him and trying to hold himself back from pulling his hand out from between your legs so he could bury his cock deep inside you, instead.
But he refused to be selfish. He said he wanted to take care of you, and he meant it. He meant it in every imaginable way.
All he wanted was you.
"So beautiful, y'know that?" he mumbled, mouth dragging over your jaw, teeth lightly nipping at your chin. "So warm 'n perfect, missed havin' you like this," he continued, lips twitching when he saw your eyes squeeze shut and mouth fall open when his fingertips brushed against that spot that had you reduced to a mumbling mess underneath him.
Joel could sense he had you right on the edge. He heard it in the way your breath came in staggered gasps and could feel it in the way your legs began to quake. He picked up the pace, breath puffing hot and fast from his nose, eyes locked on your face, eager to watch you fall apart for him after what felt like an eternity without you.
Then his face broke out into a cocky grin when the heel of his palm started to slap against your clit with each snap of his wrist. The noises you made for him were like music to his ears, a symphony of his name and more and don't stop and a litany of curses.
"Gonna come for me, darlin'? Gonna come 'n let me fuck this perfect little pussy?" he growled while biting gently at your earlobe. You whined and tipped your head back, pushing deep into your pillow as the pleasure mounted low in your belly, burning bright when it finally spilled over with a pathetic hoarse whimper. Joel groaned when your nails dragged down unexpectedly hard, leaving angry red trails over the skin of his back. Marks he would catch in the mirror on Monday and grin proudly at his reflection after he stepped out of his shower.
"Fuck, Joel," you panted, eyes fluttering open to gaze up at him. You looked so beautiful like that. All fucked out, hair a mess, skin hot, lips swollen. He dove down and pulled your lower lip between his teeth, gently tugging before letting it go and slipping his tongue into your eager mouth. His fingers had slowed to a stop inside you, but he could still feel your cunt pulsing with the aftershocks of your orgasm. It was a feeling he was very familiar with. A feeling he craved and now that he had it again, feared he may go insane if he didn't feel it around his painfully hard cock very soon.
As if you read his mind, you dragged your mouth away from his to whisper in his ear, "Fuck me, Joel," and he swore the edges of his vision blurred from just your request alone.
A high pitched moan slipped past your lips when he pulled his fingers out from between your legs. You rolled your head to the side, the sudden emptiness causing you to writhe in discomfort, but you wouldn't have to wait very long.
He reached around to unhook your strapless bra and tossed it onto your floor, like he was mad at it for keeping you from him. Then he made short work of your underwear, which you looked relieved to finally be rid of, before pulling down his boxers and freeing his throbbing cock. He caught your gaze drop and your teeth sunk into your lower lip before sitting up.
"I wanna suck it," you announced, but when you began to lean down, he grabbed your shoulders and hauled you up.
"Not tonight," he told you, and you whined a little as you reached down to stroke him. He groaned and tipped his head back, hips thrusting into your fist on their own accord.
"Please," you pleaded, lips puckering around his adam's apple. And you almost got him. He could hardly resist when you begged, especially with the promise of your warm, soft mouth wrapped around his cock, but he knew he wouldn't last long if he let you.
"Lemme fuck you, baby," he murmured when he gave you a gentle push. You flopped back onto your bed with a playful scowl, tits bouncing a little from the impact when he suddenly reached down to the floor to grab his pants. He pulled out a little foil wrapper and you frowned.
"We don't have to-"
"Just bein' extra careful, alright?" he told you, cutting you off as he rolled the condom on.
"I have an implant now. It won't be a problem like last time," you insisted, but he already tossed the wrapper to the ground and fell onto his elbows, hovering above you.
"Humor me," he said with a little smirk right before his hips pushed your thighs apart, wasting no time lining himself up with your entrance.
Normally, he would go slow. Normally, he would take his time and feed you his cock inch by inch, but on that particular evening, he was too desperate. With one deep grunt and rough thrust, he sheathed himself inside you in one go, making your jaw drop and your eyes roll to the back of your head.
"Sorry," he gasped, forehead falling to your shoulder. He squeezed his eyes shut, the sensation of your pussy gripping him so perfectly sending him reeling. "Sorry," he repeated as the both of you struggled for air, "I didn't mean, I - fuck -" his hips began to move just a little bit and he whimpered when your fingers drifted up to get tangled in his hair.
"It's okay, keep going," you encouraged him, taking a deep breath and forcing your muscles to relax.
"Don't wanna hurt you but, fuck baby, I want you so goddamn bad."
"I know, it's okay, it doesn't hurt," you told him truthfully. His mouth was open, pressed against your chest with his exhale fanning across your skin, making you shiver. You wrapped your legs around his waist and tilted your hips with a gasp. "God, you're so deep," you moaned, nails scraping his scalp when he began to move a little more steadily.
"I know, baby, I know," he murmured, voice sounding strained. It was all too much and, somehow, not enough. You clung to him when his hips began to snap against you, jostling your entire body with each earth-shattering thrust. His groans and your whimpers getting lost in each others mouths. Tears stung your eyes when he whispered, "Think 'bout you all the time. Never stop thinkin' 'bout you." And he growled when you admitted the same.
Your shitty little bed frame screamed underneath you the more desperate Joel became, no doubt grabbing the attention of Mrs. Adams across the hall. His hands never stopped moving. They cupped your breast, the back of your neck, your ass, and then his fingers hooked under your knee, pulling your leg to open up your hips.
Your eyes flew open and you cried out at the intense angle, his cock splitting you in two but his kiss put you right back together again. One of his hands fell to grab your hip, his other arm bracing himself next to your head and it felt utterly overwhelming, being completely consumed by him, that you wanted to do the same. You tugged at his hair, nipped at his throat, wrapped your other leg even tighter around his middle.
If he was going to destroy you, you wanted to give it right back.
He appeared to enjoy it. He groaned and his lips curled into a smile when you tried to take a piece of him. It made him slam his hips into your harder, had him plunging his tongue into your mouth with an urgency that sent your back arching off the bed, pressing your bare chest against his.
"You like that?" he mumbled into your mouth, lips barely leaving yours to speak. "You like when I fuck you like this?"
"So - good -" you moaned, each word bookended by a snap of his hips.
"You like gettin' me all worked up? Like drivin' me fuckin' crazy?"
"Yeah, actually, I do," you breathed, smirking at the sound of his words passing through gritted teeth. His chin dropped and his teeth grazed your nipple a little harsher than you expected and you yelped, which melted into a giggle when you felt him smile against your skin.
You pulled your lower lip between your teeth and, with your lips still curved into a smile, reached down to grab his ass, giving it a firm squeeze while making sure to add a little pinch from your nails. It made him grunt, his hips changing their pace. What was rough, strong thrusts of his hips now faltered to deep strokes which he made sure to drive upwards so he could reach that spot inside you he knew would have you screaming his name.
"Oh, fuck!" you cried out, and he chuckled darkly against your throat. "Fuck! Joel... keep - going," you gasped. Your hands were back to clawing at his shoulders while he drove into you over and over. His forehead prickled with sweat and he could feel his curls beginning to stick to his skin but he refused to let up because you were so close. Your slick walls were clenching around him, making him see stars, while you repeatedly whined his name. He smirked to himself, pleased he got exactly what he wanted. Your voice was already hoarse and he could only imagine what it would sound like in the morning, all raw and thick with sleep.
"You gonna come f'me, baby?" he asked, voice deep and gravelly in your ear. You nodded, mouth still hung open in a silent scream. "Then do it. C'mon, wanna feel you," he coaxed. "Wanna feel your tight little pussy milk this cock. Go on, lemme have it."
The ball of tension growing hotter and brighter at the base of your spine finally broke. Your back arched up again and your head flew back into the pillows as your orgasm rolled through your entire body, his name reduced to just a mere whimper on your lips, unable to give anything else. Your muscles weakened and you collapsed back into the bedding, your brain in a fog. Meanwhile, Joel reared back and dragged your hips onto his lap, pounding steadily into your used cunt, all frantic and delirious in his movements until he slammed into you one final time with a deep, prolonged groan.
Your eyes slid closed, but his mouth was back on yours in an instant. Soft, tender kisses pressed shakily against your lips, silence filling the room except for the quiet sound of your combined heavy breathing and your bed springs occasionally squealing when Joel shifted his weight.
"You good?" he murmured, pressing his forehead against yours with a deep breath. You nodded then winced when he withdrew his softening cock from between your legs. He propped himself up on his elbows and gazed down at you, searching your face very seriously for a moment. You opened your mouth to ask but the words died in your throat. Instead, you let him study you. Your eyes landed on the little wrinkles developing next to his eyes, the cute pout he made when he was deep in thought, the way his hair stood like a halo after your fingers pulled and tugged, rearranging the product that was combed through.
He kept looking at you, something happening behind his eyes, something meaningful. But just when you thought you were on the cusp of something, he blinked and cleared his throat, pushing himself upright.
"Lemme go clean up real quick," he said, glancing out into the hallway.
"Okay," you said quietly, watching as he sauntered naked through your room and disappeared into the bathroom. You could hear the sink running, then a minute later, the toilet flushing, and you suddenly felt cold. You reached for your blankets and slid underneath, and right when your mind was about to get carried away with self-doubt and too many questions, the door flung open and he stepped out with a determined look.
"I almost married Sarah's mom."
You sat up in bed, clutching the sheets to your chest with wide eyes. He was standing in your doorway, still naked except the condom was gone. His fingers fidgeted nervously at his sides and the romantic side of you found it poetic that he was fully naked and about to reveal something so personal, but you couldn't focus much on that.
"Why didn't you?"
Joel blinked.
"I thought I loved her, but I think it was just 'cause she was havin' my baby," he began. "I was thirty, just startin' to make a name for myself, made a huge fuckin' mistake and, I dunno, felt like I had to do the right thing."
"Thirty," you repeated, and he nodded. "Didn't you say that was when you built The Parador?"
He nodded again and finally moved from his spot in the doorway to join you on the bed.
"I was naive. I met her at this networkin' event with a bunch of other guys in the hospitality industry. She was just at the bar, all alone, wasn't even part of the event or a worker or nothin'. Shoulda been my first clue, but I was young and stupid."
"What do you mean?"
He pulled the blankets over his waist and leaned up against your headboard.
"I didn't know it, but she was goin' fishin' that night."
You tilted your head to the side, confusion written all over your face.
"She was lookin' to sink her claws into someone with money. She knew everyone at that event was somebody, so she cast her line and reeled one in."
Slowly, you began to connect the dots.
"She... she was using you for your money?"
Joel swallowed and nodded, his eyes darting around your face nervously.
"Did - you said the pregnancy was a mistake-"
"I don't know if she planned it, but it sure as hell felt that way after I found everythin' out. She was expectin' me to propose, thought she'd be set for life if she had my kid. Heard her on the phone one night with a friend who was doin' the same thing to someone else. Same night I came home early to surprise her after we found out we were havin' a girl."
"Oh, my god," you whispered in disbelief.
"It was wrong, I know it, but I was so fuckin' hurt," he said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I kicked her out. I know it wasn't Sarah's fault and I tried, I really fuckin' tried, but every time I saw her-" he pressed his lips into a thin line and dropped his gaze to the sheets. "Just reminded me of everythin', and I couldn't handle it."
"So... you don't have a relationship with her? Or with Sarah?" you asked. He shook his head but he kept his eyes shamefully fixed on his hands.
Suddenly, everything made sense. Joel's concern with Glenn and his emphasis on family, Tammy's vague insinuation on the yacht, Joel's inability to trust you, his resistance to opening up. It was all because he was afraid of being used again.
The fact he had never been in love sounded more like he had never allowed himself to fall in love.
But he was trusting you now. Something that was clearly very difficult for him to do while he sat in fear of judgement.
You scooted forward on the bed and tucked yourself into his side. You wrapped your arms around his middle and rested your chin on his chest, curling yourself around him, trying to make him feel safe. His heart fluttered anxiously under his skin, you could feel it, but he slowly picked up his own arms and coiled them around you protectively.
"I'm sorry, Joel."
"What- what're you sorry for?"
"For everything you went through. I'm sorry she broke your heart. I'm sorry you suffered for so long with this burden. I'm sorry you felt like you couldn't tell me before, but I promise you, I'm not judging you."
"I know," he replied, kissing the top of your head. You took another deep breath before speaking again.
"And I'm not after you for your money. I can understand now why you -"
"Sweetheart, I know," he said, cutting you off.
You frowned and looked up at him. "You do?"
He grinned and nudged his nose gently against yours.
"Yeah. Probably the only goddamn sugar baby in the world who didn't want money, so... yeah. I know."
You giggled and pulled away from his grip so you could look him in the eye.
"I mean, it's kind of ironic... you seeking out a woman to pay to be with you? Why would you-"
"'Cause I woulda rather had all our cards on the table and know up front it was just a business deal," he explained. "Didn't need someone sneakin' 'round behind my back tryin' to take advantage of me. Rather know from jump."
You felt your chest tighten a little at that, and you couldn't stop yourself from leaning forward, giving him a soft kiss on the corner of his mouth. He pulled you over to straddle his lap and wrapped his arms around your waist, gazing up at you with stars in his eyes.
"But you wanted everythin' else except my money," he murmured. You shifted your eyes to the left and began to play with a curl above his ear, suddenly growing shy under his scrutiny. But he kept going.
"Always had a feelin', but didn't wanna believe it. Couldn't believe it, I suppose," he added, watching your eyes carefully as you continued to focus on his hair. "You never cared 'bout doin' anythin' extravagant on the island. Wanted to spend time with me at the beach, wanted to get food from a stand at the corner with our goddamn faces painted," he chuckled. You grinned and felt your cheeks grow hot.
"Then you left those envelopes," he said, and your eyes finally found his again. He let a heavy moment pass between you as you stared down at him. "Never even opened 'em. Gave you that first one the first night we were there. And you didn't open it."
You shook your head and a slow smile stretched across his face.
"Then with the hell you gave me and the bank 'bout the payment after we got back," he groaned, tilting his face to the ceiling like he was in agony.
"Fifty thousand was too fucking much!" you practically shouted, but he just laughed and pulled you closer.
"You actually fuckin' like me," he said in wonder. "Why would someone like you want anythin' to do with someone like me?"
You threw your head back and laughed, immediately recognizing your own words being parroted back to you.
"Because," you replied once your laughter waned, "you're a good man, despite what you may think. You care and you're sweet and you make me feel safe. You make me feel good about myself. You pay attention to things that mean something to me. You - I -" you cut yourself off with a quick shake of your head. "Yeah... I actually fucking like you," you finished with a slow smile.
He grinned and cupped the back of your neck, but before pulling you down for a kiss, he whispered, "How'd I get so lucky?"
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The next morning, you awoke to an empty bed. If it weren't for the incessant ache between your legs and the soreness of your throat, you would have wondered if it was all a dream. You reached for the other side of the bed and felt the sheets cool under your fingertips.
It was Saturday. You didn't think he would have worked that day, but then again, it was Joel, so maybe he did. But would he really leave without saying goodbye? After you were so raw and vulnerable with each other the night before?
That was when you heard it. Faint humming and music turned on low coming from your kitchen.
Oh, now this you had to see.
When you rolled out of bed, you almost reached for your pajamas, but then you spotted his shirt neatly draped over your desk chair and you couldn't resist. You picked it up and slid your arms through, rumpling the fabric underneath your chin and taking a deep breath. It still smelled just like him. A mixture of deodorant, soap, cologne and hair products. A unique scent that was quickly becoming a favorite of yours.
You stepped out of your bedroom and peered into your kitchen, a smile pulling at your lips when you saw him pouring coffee for you both, wearing only his boxers with the sweet sounds of 80s ballads filling the air. You crossed your arms and leaned against the wall, gaze slowly gliding over the strong, broad muscles of his back until he turned around and froze.
"Was gonna make you somethin' to eat and then I remembered... I don't know how to cook."
You burst out laughing and Joel grinned when he handed you your coffee.
"But you figured out the coffee machine," you said, taking a tentative sip and giving him an impressed look.
"That thing's a piece of shit, I'm buyin' you a new one," he scolded.
You dropped your jaw and frowned.
"No, you will not. It's not in its prime, sure, but it makes the best coffee."
Joel chuckled and wrapped the hand not holding his coffee around your ribs. Taking a step forward and dropping his chin had him towering over you seductively.
"Y'look real good in my clothes," he murmured, lips brushing against your forehead with a low hum.
"Couldn't help myself," you admitted softly, "smells just like you."
He pulled back a bit to give you half a smile. "You like smellin' like me?"
"Mhmm," you said under your breath, then nuzzled your nose into his bare chest and took a deep breath. "But now you smell like me."
Joel groaned and dipped his head lower, slotting his lips hungrily against yours. When his tongue slipped past your lips, you giggled and pulled away.
"I need some coffee first," you teased. He just smirked while his fingertips rubbed his bottom lip, like he were chasing the ghost of your kiss. His soft brown eyes were glimmering, so happy and content in your little living room slash kitchen. His cheeks were slightly pink and you weren't sure you'd ever seen him smile so much before.
While you sipped your coffee, you began to crack some eggs in a frying pan while simultaneously tossing some bread in the toaster. Meanwhile, Joel was nosing curiously around your apartment, inspecting little trinkets that he didn't have the chance to look at the night before.
"Snowglobe from Disney?" Joel asked, holding it up from across the room. You looked over your shoulder with a grin.
"My aunt and uncle are obsessed with Disney. They get me Disney themed shit every year for Christmas."
Joel hummed and placed it down gently on the windowsill before spotting a vase filled with sand and seashells. He smiled as he approached, too worried he would break it to pick it up when he asked, "When'd you steal sand?"
He heard you laugh and he turned back around.
"The day we were at the beach together. I had a ziploc for my sunscreen so, you know," you said with a shrug while you flipped the eggs. Joel gave the vase one more look, smiling to himself when he saw the new pink seashells scattered throughout.
"Where are you gonna hang the painting?" he asked when he saw it leaning up against the wall next to your television.
"I don't know yet. Maybe next to the door. Or maybe behind the couch," you answered, focusing on buttering the toast and turning off the gas before the eggs burned. You jumped when you suddenly felt his hands sliding around your waist.
"Supposed to go above the bed," he reminded you. Tilting your head to look at him over your shoulder, you grinned.
"You remember everything, don't you?"
"Sure do," he replied, giving your ass a playful smack before picking up both plates of food. "Where do you wanna eat?"
You both sunk into your old couch and balanced your plates on your knees, shoveling in forkfuls of food in between explaining the story behind every little thing that caught his eye.
Then he spotted your picture frames again. He leaned forward to put his empty plate on your coffee table and stood, his hulking, mostly-still-naked frame captivating you for a moment as he picked up a photo to study it.
"Your folks?" he asked, tilting the frame towards you. You squinted and nodded from the couch. "Any siblings?"
The question came out soft as he angled it back towards him.
"Nope. Just me. I've always wanted a sister but Celine was a pretty good substitute," you smiled as he picked up a photo of you and Celine on New Years Eve.
"'S'nice," he murmured thoughtfully, taking one last look at the photo before putting it back. He pretended to study a photo of you and your grandparents from your graduation when he added, "Probably best you got to pick. My brother's been a pain in the ass since I was old enough to ride a bike."
You perked up at the mention of his brother, folding your legs underneath you and setting your plate down next to his.
"Yeah?"
"Mhmm," he hummed, still staring down at the picture. "Always usin' my shit and breakin' it. Buttin' in with me 'n my friends to do somethin' stupid. Got me in trouble more times than I can count with our Mama," he mused. He finally set the picture down and turned to look at you. "Then he got older. The fuck ups got more serious. Bailin' him outta jail every other weekend. Got a DUI one summer and had me haulin' his ass all over town."
Your eyebrows raised in surprise but you remained silent, just nodding your head and giving him your full attention, too afraid to spook him with any questions just yet.
"Then we grew up. I moved out here, six months later he follows, 'course," he said, sounded exasperated when he plopped down on the couch next to you. "Got a job at a hotel, 'fore you know it he's beggin' me for a job. Got 'em one workin' as a dishwasher in the restaurant inside the hotel but he fucked that up before I could blink an eye."
Before he even finished the story, you could sense where it was going.
"Finally, he finds his own way. Gets in with a construction company. And he did pretty good, too. I had my thing goin' on at the hotel. Learnin' from the manager 'n all that. By the time I was ready to renovate my first hotel, Tommy'd ended up owning his own company. It was small, but, hell... it was the best he ever got."
You chewed your lower lip anxiously, watching as his eyes slid over to your dusty television, staring at it blankly before he continued.
"So, I hired him. Hired his company to renovate part of the hotel. He even cut me a deal. Thought for once he'd finally pulled his head outta his ass and made somethin' of himself."
Joel fell silent for a few minutes, lost in thought while his fingers fidgeted nervously in his lap.
"Then what happened?" you whispered, worried if you had spoken any louder, it would have snapped him out of it and he would clam back up.
"Then... his company went under. He wasn't doin' shit by the book. Got caught payin' guys under the table and fuckin' up his taxes. And he had to start over."
You connected the dots even before he said, "He came to me lookin' for a loan. Lookin' to fix all his goddamn mistakes, like nothin' ever changed. And... I said no."
"And he never forgave you," you guessed. His eyes found yours and he nodded.
"Yeah. Never forgave me. Said I was turnin' my back on blood. Said he woulda done the same for me. But I just had fuckin' enough. I worked hard to get what I had. So, I refused and he had to move back to Texas. Last I heard he got a loan from our Pop and started a business down there."
You sat in silence for a moment, letting his story sink in with the only noise coming from horns blaring on the street below and your next door neighbor shouting at her husband to wake up for work.
"So... that's the brother story, huh?" you finally said, the corner of your mouth lifting when he met your eye and nodded. You shrugged and scooted closer to him on the couch. "That's not so bad. I understand why you did what you did."
"Had the whole situation goin' on with Sarah's mom at the time, too, but 'course he had no idea. Felt like he never asked me much 'bout my life unless he needed somethin'," he said solemnly.
You snuggled in close and lifted his arm to drape over your shoulders.
"It's never too late, you know," you told him softly. His thumb began to trace invisible circles over your shoulder.
"For what?"
"To make peace. With both of them," you replied. "If you wanted to, anyway. And if you ask me, it sounds like you want to."
"Oh, yeah? And how d'you know that?" Joel teased, pinching your arm and making you giggle.
"Because," you said, tilting your chin to look at him. "If you didn't want to, you wouldn't care so much. You wouldn't have kept all this a secret and you wouldn't think you're a bad person. But what do I know?" you said with a sigh before resting your head against his chest. "I'm just the sugar baby."
Joel's loud laugh echoed throughout your tiny apartment. You grinned when he grabbed your waist and pulled you onto his lap to face him, dark eyes sparkling as he gazed up at you.
"You ain't a sugar baby, and you know it."
"Then what am I?"
He cupped the back of your neck and brought your lips down to meet his in a gentle kiss.
"You're the woman I'm fallin' in love with," he whispered, voice trembling a little. You locked eyes, the surprise and excitement coursing through your veins causing you to smile so wide that it hurt.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah," he replied with a smile of his own. "Real goddamn inconvenient," he added, making you giggle and press another kiss against his mouth.
"Told you," you said breathlessly. "But we can take things slow, seeing as you're a newbie and all." Joel scoffed and tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear.
The dam had finally broke. All the secrets and lies were revealed. For better or worse, you both put your hearts in each others hands and trusted that the other would keep it safe.
As if reading your mind, Joel's hand dropped to your chest. He flattened his palm over your rapidly beating heart while you played with the curls on the nape of his neck.
"This is real," he stated softly, voice a little thicker than before. He had a look on his face like he couldn't believe it, and you smiled.
"Yeah, it's real."
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aikaterini-drag · 5 months ago
Text
Shower Ride
Pairing: August x fem reader
Summary: your boyfriend Augusts gives you a shower ride 😉
Warnings: 18+!!,minors dni, explicit smut, fingering, oral male receiving, p in v sex, cockwarming at the end.
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It was a quiet night, the city sounds muffled from your apartment.
Walking on tiptoes, you made your way to your boyfriend’s office. You peeked through the half-opened door, and even though he was deep into his work, August, being the agent he was, seemed to sense your presence. He gave you a soft smile before returning to his laptop.
He remained at his desk, completely absorbed in analyzing the profile for one of his upcoming missions. He had been at it for hours, poring over details and taking work calls with his team. Coffee after coffee, he had barely eaten, and only finished the sandwich you had made for him an hour ago because you insisted.
He looked so dangerously handsome. Sitting so big and towering in his office, making the space seem so small with his broad shoulders and possessive presence. His physique was honed from years of intense physical training and demanding missions.
His eyes, those piercing blue globes were focused on the laptop screen, his long fingers typing away. A few strands of dark hair fell across his forehead. His jaw was tight, chiseled jawline sporting a shadow of stubble along with his mustache.
August still wore his perfectly tailored dark suit though he’d loosened his tie and discarded his blazer. The crisp white dress shirt was undone by a few buttons, revealing a hint of curls on his chest.
“I’m going to have a shower,” you said, hoping to tempt him away from his work. He’d done so much; he needed a break, a rewarding fuck and some well-deserved sleep.
He didn’t look up from his laptop. “Hmm.”
With a soft grimace, you headed to the bathroom and slipped off your clothing. You’d have to work harder on your seductions skills. After taking a shower, you’d try again—maybe slip into some sexy lingerie and surprise him at his desk.
You stepped into the shower and turned on the taps, adjusting the water temperature until it was just right. Standing under the warm spray, you closed your eyes, letting the water soothe your tired muscles. Lost in the relaxing flow, you didn’t hear the door open, nor sense August as he slipped into the shower with you.
And, damn what a sight he was. Fully naked, tall and bunching with muscles. His hands were etched with veins, his stomach flat and chiseled, his thighs thick and powerful. And in between his legs, his rigid cock protruded almost angrily, so hard and long that it reached up to his bellybutton.
Your belly gave a little somersault, your inner goddess satisfied.
You smiled. “You know, you really need to stop sneaking up on me. It’s kind of creepy.”
August chuckled as he closed the shower door and stood behind you. “I’m sorry, love. I was so focused that I barely heard you. By the time I did…”
“You’ve done too much work today. You must take a break.”
He beaned in, his breath warm against your neck. “You are absolutely right.”
He trailed kisses down your neck, his hands traveling over your arms, thighs and your belly before cupping the weight of your breasts. He cradled them in his palms, thumbs toying with your nipples. You leaned back in his chest, taking deep intakes of breath.
“I didn’t give my girl much attention today. I need to make it up to her,” his deep voice rumbled, sending a shiver down your spine.
“Hmn.” You hummed but he turned your head and claimed your lips in a kiss. His tongue explored your mouth, warm and probing as it swirled around yours.
He nudged your legs apart with his knee, and you complied, spreading your thighs. “That’s my good girl.”
A finger teased your pussy lips, rubbing round and round and you couldn’t help but moan against his mouth. He still kissed you, while he gathered with your slickness, toying with your clit. Rubbing, tapping, curling and then penetrating you with a thick finger. He did it over and over again.
Your knees wobbled, and he steadied you with a hand around your waist as you climaxed, mewling and gasping in bliss.
“That’s it,” he drawled, his finger pumping gently in your sensitive walls. “Sweet pussy drenching my fingers.”
“Want you,” you muttered, your head a little fuzzy.
“You have me—”
“Want to suck you.”
“Then suck.”
All you could do was whimper and get to your knees before him. August turned off the taps, and moved away your wet hair from your face. One hand cupped his heavy balls while the other pumped his turgid cock. Your tongue travelled up the length of it, following a rigid vein up to the purple tip. Groaning, he lowered his knees so you could reach him better, his hands running up and down your sides.
“Open.” His command was husky.
You opened your mouth and hollowed your cheeks as he slid down your throat. The head touched the back of your throat and you shallowed hard to stop yourself from gagging. He was too big, but he had trained you to take him deep, as deep as possible. Taking deep breaths from your nose, you cupped the cock that didn’t fit and toyed with his sack.
“That’s it. Get me nice and warm, baby,” he said darkly, his fingers pinching your nipples.
August’s hands fisted in your hair, pulling back the entire length of his dick. You licked a wide stripe up his dick then took it back inside your warm mouth. Making correct eye contact, you worked your tongue, and relished in the sight of your man so deep in pleasure.
With only your mouth around him, you had him under your control. With a surge of arousal, you sucked him in earnest, your hands digging into his flexing hips. Lewd sounds encased the shower until he was so out of his mind with pleasure he had to jerk your head away.
He pushed you to your feet and pressed you against the cool tiles, lifting you against his hard body. Your legs wrapped around him, arms locking around his neck. He lined his cock, you were so slick and ready that he surged upwards in one smooth glide. You shut your eyes at the overwhelming stretch and the fullness of him inside you.
“My perfect pussy.”
“My perfect cock.”
He smiled before pulling your mouth to his.
From there on, you lost track of time. You could only feel his steady pumps and the hard girth of him pounding into you. You could only hear his feral growls as he grabbed your asscheeks and thrust you up and down on him, making you take him deep, deeper still.
You moaned without end, running your fingers down his hair, digging your nails into his back and running tongue over his throat.
His thrusts were in perfect sync, sharp and hitting that sensitive spot inside you.
“Oh, like that.” Your heels dug into his tight ass. “D-Don’t stop.”
August didn’t stop, he kept going in the exact same rhythm, changing nothing.
Sweet death. You came hard around him, blabbering his name, crying out incomprehensible sweet words. He followed right after, tensing balls deep inside you, pumping his load inside you with wild abandon.
“Fucking hell.” He sighed against your breasts. “That was so fucking good.”
“Fucking hell indeed.” You grinned, caressing his nape.
“Want to fuck you all night,” he mumbled, taking your nipple into his mouth.
“I want that, too.”
“I must bathe you first.” Holding onto your thighs and keeping himself deep inside you, he sat back on the marble shower seat.
“We’ll bathe? Like this?” you asked incredulously. “You can’t keep me lodged to your cock, August, seriously—”
August grinned and slapped your bum lightly. “Quiet.”
“Cockwarming lover.”
Bringing one hand to cup the back of your neck, he claimed your lips. You moaned against him, rubbing your nipples against his chest. Unintentionally, your hips moved against him, rubbing your clit against his pubic bone.
“Such a demanding woman,” he drawled against your lips, one corner of his mouth turned up.
“Shut up.”
“Who can’t have enough of my dick now?”
You didn’t manage to answer because he took your breath away with his touches, thrusting and rubbing until the both of you gasped into each other’s mouths and came once again.
755 notes · View notes
blackreaderfics · 4 months ago
Text
Princess Treatment | Jason Todd x Fem!Reader
↳ Pairing : TitansDC!Jason Todd x shy!Reader
↳ Rating :  E
↳ Summary : After losing a bet, Jason is at your beck and call for the rest of the year. Pt. 2 of Wildcard
↳ W.C : ~5k
↳ Tags + Warnings: references to the previous fic, banter, oral (female receiving), face-sitting, grinding, shyish!reader x tsundereish!jason, reader wears glasses, jason is still a kind of dickhead but less of the dick and more of the giving head, once again side characters are there (rachel, rose, gar, conner, and dickkory)  
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“Y’know if you wanted DoorDash, there’s a little something called ‘the App Store’. Just thought you might like to know.” 
You glanced up from the book you were reading on your bed and, sure enough, there was a certain messy-haired boy glowering back at you, hand stuffed in one pocket with the other cradling a plastic bag full of your Bat Burger order.
He unceremoniously plopped the bag on the desk by your bed.
“And why would I do that, when I have you?” You said simply trying to emulate Rose’s confident way of speech.
You sat up, closing your book to examine the plastic bag. It had been a week since you, Rachel, and Rose had all agreed on the terms of your agreement. The boys—Jason, Conner, and Gar had all lost a bet over Game Night, and as one does, had to bear the consequences of being the girls’ gophers, or as Rose liked to call it “errand bitches”, for the rest of the year.
Thanks to Game Night, Jason was your gopher. That night had been the first night you’d spoken at length to Jason other than greetings or pleasantries. While Rachel and Rose had readily accepted their new positions of power, it was almost daunting for you to tell the King of Back-Sass himself what to do.
You started small at first, asking him for simple things like opening jars or reaching high places. It wasn’t until Conner and Gar had seen how sparingly you were ordering him around that they started to complain. 
“If they see Jason barely doing anything, then they’re not gonna listen to us Y/N. And then the whole integrity of the bet gets thrown off. What’s gonna be the point of making bets in the first place if we don’t follow through?” Rachel hissed at you between sparring trainings.
It was agreed that any time you were near Dick (or any other older Titan for that matter) that the agreement was off. If Dick had caught any whiff of the bet, he’d probably ban Game Night—or worse, lecture them on how divisions on the basis of gender would erode teamwork on the field and blah blah blah.
From then on, you agreed to give Jason more orders. Or at least, the illusion of keeping him busy so Rachel and Rose would get off your back. Making Jason your personal UberEats seemed to do the trick. And it actually worked for a few days until… it didn’t. 
You opened the bag and wrinkled your nose at the half-eaten Bat Burger and a handful of fries. You didn’t get mad, you rarely ever did, but this was certainly annoying. 
“Jason,” You said giving him a withering look.
“What? You should be glad I saved you some. Besides, princess,” He said sarcastically, "You can’t just be eating anything. I’m testing for poison.” He reached into the bag and snatched a single fry. He took a bite and chewed for a moment thoughtfully. “Yep, all clear. Anything else you need?”
Jason was clearly testing your patience, pushing your buttons and the limits of your authority. At this rate, the few days he actually listened to you seemed too good to be true.
“No, just—I don’t need anything.” You cursed yourself for stammering and felt yourself fluster seeing his smug face. “Can you please just leave?” You got up from the bed to shoo him away.
“You’re not really good at this are you?” He snorted, dodging your lunge at him to leave the room. 
“That’s not how this works.” You took a breath to compose yourself and adjusted your glasses from falling off your nose. “We have an agreement that you follow my orders. And I just ordered you to do something, so you can go now.”
“Yea, I understand that perfectly fine.” He crossed his arms and tilted his head as if in pity. “It’s just… you’re not good at it.” He laughed again. 
You rolled your eyes. “I don’t need to be good at it if that’s what was agreed.” He was implying you were meek, and maybe that was true, but that wasn’t even the whole point of the agreement. Leave it to Jason to be difficult about something as simple as this.
“I get that but, at least make it believable. You know, ‘cuz then maybe I’d actually be inclined to play along.”
You shot him a weirded out look under his scrutiny. “You’re unbelievable. I’ll leave.” You made a move for the door but Jason quickly stepped in the way. Annoying.
“I’m serious, I swear. Why do you think we all listen to Dick?”
“We listen to Dick. You’re the one that doesn’t.”
He grinned. “Ok, fair enough. But, why do you all listen to Dick?”
“I don’t know, maybe because he’s a good leader?” You threw up your hands in exasperation. “What’s your point, Jason? You’re starting to sound like him.”
“Ok first, I’m disgusted you’d even say that. And second, my point is Dick doesn’t say ‘can you please leave?’ He doesn’t ask. He either tells you or makes you.”
You stared blankly at him, but he seemed eager to make a point. “You want me to act like Dick? That way you’ll listen to me?”
“Well, no ‘cuz that wouldn’t really work, remember?” The corner of his mouth quirked up. He was all too happy to get on your nerves now. “What I’m saying is you need to Make. Me. Listen.” He leaned in a little bit, letting his voice lower as he emphasized the words.
How're you a virgin when you're takin' my cock this good, hm?
“Ugh.” You shuddered, his voice by your ear involuntarily taking you back to that night you both seemed to pretend never happened. You pushed him away, having grown tired of his smug face. When you stepped towards the door again, he rushed over and closed it shut. “Oh for God’s sake.”
You tried to step around him to no avail. 
“Move.” You glowered.
Jason's eyebrows raised slightly, almost impressed. “Acceptable.” He stepped aside to let you pass. 
As you walked through the hallway, you could hear Jason’s soft footsteps behind you.
You whipped around. “Stop following me.”
“I’m not ‘following you’, there’s only one hallway. If anything you’re in my way.” He shrugged. The look on his face bore no emotion but you swore you could see amusement twinkle in his eye.
Just ahead, Dick was walking in your direction sipping on a steaming mug of coffee. 
“Y/N, Jason! Glad to see you two getting along.”
Your frustration dissipated at the sight of the chipper man. On the field, he was as serious as can be, but off the field, he was as intimidating as a substitute teacher. 
You and Dick’s eyes both followed after Jason, who hadn’t bothered to stop and say hello. The elder brother only shook his head with a good-natured sigh and returned his attention back to you.
“I’ve noticed you warming up to everyone lately. With the other girls, I mean. You, Rose, and Rachel really seem to be a good team, especially during our practices. Even Jason is playing nice with the others. He can be a bit abrasive sometimes but these days, I can see he’s making progress with teamwork too.”
“Thanks uh- I guess it’s all thanks to you. Game Nights really helped us to get closer.” 
“Glad to hear it.” He patted you on the shoulder and turned the corner to the computer room.
When you walked into the living room, you heard everyone exhale in relief. 
“What?” You looked around quizzically. Game Night Crew had gathered again on the couches, this time—thankfully—fully clothed.
“We thought you were Grayson,” Rose called from the couch. “He almost caught us the first time.”
Caught? Doing what?
You weren’t entirely prepared for what you saw but Rose and Rachel were concentrating hard on painting Conner and Gar’s nails.
“Are you completely sure this is vegan?”
“Yes, now hold still.” Rose admonished Gar, applying another coat with professional precision.
Rachel looked up from her handiwork with Conner’s hand. She wordlessly tossed a look from you to Jason who was currently looking more interested in whatever was in the fridge than at the group in the living room. Her face clearly read, make him do something now. You sent her back a look that read, fine.
You cleared your throat. “Jason.” You tried to muster up as much authority as you could. Knowing what you knew now, you knew he wouldn’t budge at the slightest tremor of your voice.
“Hn.” Was his only response, but at least you knew you caught his attention. When he turned, you locked eyes on his. “Come here, ple—I mean. Come here.”
You watched him crack a smile. He closed the refrigerator door and ambled over. So far so good.
He didn’t seem to register anyone else in the room. He only tilted his head, waiting for the next direction.
“Sit down.”
He paused as if contemplating whether or not to answer to an instruction one gave a dog thinly veiled as an order. Even so, he sat. Well, that was easy enough, you thought to yourself. It was almost comical to see him be so obedient.
“Give me your hand.” You primed.
You could see his hesitation as you reached for the nearest nail polish bottle, but it was erased as soon as you met his gaze again. 
“That’s… not my color.”
“Of course.” You picked up a burgundy red. “How could I forget?”
He sneered at your teasing but still allowed your light hold under the palm of his hand.
“Why does he get a choice and we don’t?” Gar pouted, looking longingly at a green bottle of nail polish
“I kinda like the black.” Conner shrugged and gave his other unpolished hand to Rachel.
“You can never go wrong with black.” Rachel agreed.
Jason grimaced as he watched the polish coat his nail. It was wholly apparent that under any other circumstance, he would’ve never allowed you to do this, but you were thankful that he liked to keep whatever honor he had to words. Under the agreement and as long as you spoke to him with confidence, he would listen.
౨ৎ
The next week Dick had decided that based on the success of Game Night with team morale, an outing would be another great chance for the younger members of the team to get closer. That’s why you were now sitting at the beach and squinting the sun out of your eyes. 
You had volunteered to watch everyone’s stuff while they explored the bordering pier. Jason had practically disappeared the moment his flip-flops hit the sand.
It was nice to be out just to be out, not in the field on a mission. Titan’s tower felt like one giant bubble and it was easy to forget that there was life outside being a hero. 
You settled into people-watching as you waited for the rest of the group to return. There was a group of teens playing volleyball by the net, a family of three showing their toddler how to make a sandcastle, and couples—lots of couples. 
“You not gonna go to the pier?”
You were in the middle of gazing wistfully at a couple that was sharing their ice cream when you felt a shadow over you.
“I’m watching everyone’s stuff until they get back.” You squinted up at him. Even with your hat on, it was an incredibly bright summer day.
Jason plopped down on the beach towel next to you. He was wearing swim trunks and an unbuttoned linen shirt which didn’t do much to hide the lean cuts of muscle on his abdomen. Judging by his damp curls, he had just returned from a swim in the ocean.
“I can watch,” He jutted his chin in the direction of the pier. “You should go.”
“Maybe in a little bit.” You dug your feet into the sand, feeling the warmth tingle your toes. You didn’t feel like leaving your spot just yet.
He reached behind you for his towel and bent a bit over to muss his hair dry. You were close enough to feel the tiny droplets of water tickle your skin.
“Do you have to do that right next to me?” You said, not incredibly annoyed though—the water felt cool. It was enough to make you want to go for a swim to cool down too.
“Sorry,” he said a bit sheepishly, peeking up at you from beneath the towel. His hair, now much drier and fluffed, made him look somewhat like a puppy. Cute.
You gave him a small smile before returning your attention to the ebbing and receding of the ocean tide.
“Got a lot on your mind?” 
You quickly broke your stare from the water to see that Jason was still looking at up you, eyebrow cocked in curiosity. It was the look he gave you that always made you think he didn’t quite get you. A fascinated look that made you feel like you were another species under his gaze.
“I was just thinking it’s nice to take a break and be normal for a change.”
“Normal?”
“Like,” you gestured vaguely around the beach. “Everyone here. No missions, no bad guys. Normal.”
“Yea, hanging out?” he snorted, “We do that all the time.”
Jason had been a cape since before you’d even met Dick and the rest of the group. You were still getting used to your new way of life. He was either being willfully obtuse or he really just didn’t understand you at all. You and Jason were opposites after all. Your quiet and shy often clashed with his bold and boisterous.
“I don’t mean just hanging out, I mean other stuff too.”
The couple you had seen earlier caught your eye again. They were now sitting on a beach towel further ahead of where you were. They looked like they were in their own world, nudging each other playfully in laughter. If you hadn’t joined the Titans what would you be doing now?
He followed your line of sight, gazing silently at the couple for a moment before flickering his eyes away to the water.
“We could do other stuff.”  
You expected him to be smirking at you like he usually did when he teased or made a joke, but he wasn’t looking at you anymore. When you glanced at him you could see a faint flush on his cheeks. Probably from the heat.
You shook your head, realizing what you implied and trying now to take it back. “I didn’t mean with you, I mean with regular people.”
“What? Like it makes a difference?”
“Well, yea fundamentally. Gar can turn into animals, Rachel has a demon trapped inside her, Rose can’t die, Conner is Superboy. You’re...”
He frowned at your pause. “Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence.”
You let out a laugh, happy that you’d annoyed him for a change.
“Well, by your logic,” he began, pointedly ignoring your laughter, “then we’re the most normal Titans here.”
He had a point. You didn’t have any special powers either but Dick had taken you in just the same.
“If you want to be a regular person for a day, I guess, now’s as good a time as any.” He shrugged noncommittally as he rose from his spot on the sand. Jason took your wrist and gently pulled you on your feet. “C’mon, before they get here.”
You furrowed your brow, worried about your unguarded post but you were relieved that Game Night crew were already on their way back.
You heard them before you could fully spot them. Conner and Gar had been happily chatting away at the head of the group. Rachel and Rose were holding prizes from the boardwalk games. Dick and Kory, being the ones that drove you here, rounded out the back of the small crowd. Kory seemed to have found delight in the terrestrial delicacy, cotton candy.
After having guided you through the throngs of pedestrians to the main attractions, he released his hold on your wrist and gestured around theatrically as he spoke, "Now we’re just two regular people at the boardwalk. There’s the very normal Ferris Wheel, normal Whack-a-Mole, normal churros gotta love those—”
“I get it,” you laughed cutting him off before he could rattle on everything within visible range around you.
"Nah, I don't think you do, but you're lucky you have me to show you. Watch this."
You shot him a skeptical look and followed after to a target shot game booth. Arrays of red targets were displayed in rows while giant stuffed animals hung along the back wall.
"Which one you want?" He pulled out a few bills to hand the attendant and passed you a few of the colorful balls for you to play a round too.
You pointed at a giant brown teddy bear hanging by its ears.
Thwack. Thwack. Thwack. Thwack.
One by one the targets fell in succession. He held the last ball in his hand and after a moment of thought, lobbed it lightly askew and letting it fall short of any target.
He gave you a smug smile and collected the teddy bear before handing it off to you.
"You call that normal?" You said incredulously, but still accepting the bear in your arms.
"What? I missed that last one."
"Sure." Jason was nothing if not terrifyingly accurate.
You played a few more games, amassing a trove of arcade treasures for each other, both of you trying your best not to be too good at the games. As you ventured down the boardwalk, you couldn't help but find your eyes linger on the young couples that surrounded you.
"When you said 'other stuff' earlier, you meant like dating stuff, right?" He said innocently between bites of funnel cake. You had decided to rest and were currently sitting down in a shaded food court, stuffed animals in tow.
You contemplated denying it but saw no reason to keep it from him. This revelation being objectively less embarrassing than the time you revealed you were still a virgin during a round of “Never Have I Ever.”
Taking your silence as an answer, he continued. "Well, since we're still doing normal shit we could try that."
You tried not to gape at him. “T-then we’d just be faking it. It wouldn’t be real...”
“So? How would you know real from fake if you've never dated anyone before?"
“Where did you get that from? I never said I didn’t date anyone before.”
“W-well I just assumed since—"
“I’ve been on dates, Jason. I’ve just never had sex.” You retorted.
“Well, Technically. We kinda, y’know..."
You don't know how fucking pretty you look with my cock in your mouth, Y/N
You pursed your lips, mind flashing to his moans, him begging you to put your mouth on him, the sloppy makeout session with him after he'd punished his cock down your throat. That’s the whole reason you guys were even talking this much now. The bet. 
This is the first time you addressed that sexcapade since it happened and it's just been this weird tension ever since. It was the elephant-sized weirdness in the room, whenever you guys were around each other. You wondered faintly if Rachel and Rose were having the same issues after that night too.
"But if you don’t want to…"
"Fine."
"I-Oh,” He stammered as if he hadn’t thought that far ahead. “Ok...um what do you want me to do?" He rubbed the back of his neck, this time the tips of his ears tinged a faint pink.
“I don’t know." You felt yourself blush, "Act like you like me.”
He blinked back his surprise, bemused. “And what would that entail exactly?”
“You know what it entails.” You scoffed, exasperated.
“Not really no. I wouldn’t know something like that.” He recovered the annoying twinkle he usually carried in his eyes.
“I’d rather not do this if you’re going to make fun of me.”
“I’m joking. You mean act like your boyfriend and whatnot. I got it.”
In one swift motion, he leaned in closer and pressed a soft kiss to your lips. The powdered sugar was still sweet on his tongue but as quickly as it started, you could already feel him pulling away.
"W-why did you do that? At least warn me first.”
"'Cuz that’s not what boyfriends do.
“Are you the boyfriend expert now?”
“I happen to be,” He smirked. "You got a little something." He swiped his thumb at what was most likely some leftover sugar at the corner of your mouth and brought it to his lips to taste.
౨ৎ
The ride back home was not totally uncomfortable, but it was still awkward. Jason appeared to be unfazed, joking and laughing with the boys like nothing happened. You tried your best to match his nonchalance, but given the curious looks Rachel kept throwing the both of you, you'd failed.
Jason confused you. One moment it seemed like he liked you, and the next he would act like he barely knew you. You hated it. And to avoid the sting of another unrequited crush, you didn't ask anything of him for a few days, Game Night Bet be damned.
You had been reading a book on one of those rare free-schedule days when a light knock came at your door. When you opened it, Jason was on the other side holding a brown paper bag. You eyed the Bat Burger bag first, and then the boy holding it warily.
“I didn't order anything."
With all the missions and trouble in the city, everyone gradually stopped doing the bet thing anyway.
He shrugged and rubbed the back of his neck. “I owe you. For last time."
“Oh. um. Ok, I guess.” You took the bag from him and set it down at your desk. You figured that would be the end of the conversation but he remained at your doorway appearing to look like he wanted to say something else. You paused, waiting for him to speak and when he didn't, you moved to close the door again.
“W-wait! I… I’m giving you a warning this time.”
Warning?
Then it finally clicked.
“Is… that ok?”
There was a slight worry in his gaze as if he was unsure you'd say yes. You felt something in your stomach flip, words got caught in your throat and you could only give him a small nod.
Upon your approval he stepped in closer, eyes dropping languidly from yours down to your lips. He carefully slid your glasses off his face, folding them neatly on the desk. You felt his hands pull you in by the hip to press your body against him. This time when he kissed you, it wasn't the same as when you were at the beach. It was slower, deliberate. Like he had been building up to this very moment.
You closed the door behind you as the kisses became more wanton and his hands began to roam grasping at your waist and hips, kneading handfuls of your ass beneath your skirt. You loved how he felt pressed against you, sturdy and strong. It wasn't long before you stumbled backward onto the bed and found yourself under him.
"What? Am I too loud?" His brow furrowed in worry when he felt your kisses subside. "I’ll be quieter."
"No, it's not that," you laughed a bit. He did have a habit of making tiny moans through kisses. But you gave him an extra peck on the lips for reassurance. "It’s just...You’re doing this because you want to right?"
“Not even gonna lie, I wanted to do this since the day you showed up.” His smile was bashful, like he just admitted a secret.
The guy you've liked since you joined the Titans had been thinking about you the same way? You thought back to the times you interacted. Jason's attention to you always came in the form of teasing but the weirdness after Game Night and the beach only served to confuse you more.
“Well, you did a shit job of showing it.” You pouted, adjusting your position beneath him to slide your shirt off.
“That’s only ‘cuz I thought you hated me." He sat up a bit to take his own shirt off before returning to plant kisses across your body.
“Ok, hate is a strong word.”
“You’re not denying it.” You could feel him smiling against your skin.
“More like minor dislike. But that’s only because I thought you didn’t like me.”
“I’m sorry." He murmured kissing your jaw, then down your neck. "I think pretty girls make my brain stop working. But I can make it up to you." He slid a hand underneath your unclasped bra and thumbed over the nipple. You let out a small gasp of air. “D'you want me to?”
You nodded, meeting his eyes. 
“Use your words.”
“I want you to-oh fuck." Before you could even finish your sentence, his mouth had replaced his hand on your breast. He made sure to keep his eyes on you as he sucked and made warm licks at one breast, making sure to keep the other occupied with his hand.
In any other circumstance, he would never have missed the chance to tease you about your new choice of vocabulary, but he had a different kind of teasing in mind. He had removed his mouth from your breast and was now kissing up your inner thigh, rubbing his thumb in gentle circles over your panties.
“You’re so fucking wet."
He pulled down your panties and worked one finger and then two until his fingers were squelching in and out of your pussy. You'd masturbated before—maybe even masturbated to the fantasy of him fingering you too—but it was nothing like this. His hands were much bigger and roughened by years of combat on and off the field. It was better than you could’ve imagined yourself
“Can I taste it?” He asked, voice hoarse with need. Like if you’d denied him, you might as well have denied a desperately thirsty man water.
Before you could even reply, he replaced his fingers with his mouth. He laved at your entrance, relishing in your whimpering his name and your tangling your fingers through his hair. Jason might've loved a good blowjob, but he practically worshiped pussy. Every suck and kiss of your folds was accompanied by his pretty moans.
It was at this point where you felt yourself hurtling towards climax, but before you could get your much-needed release, you felt the warmth from his mouth leave you.
“Please...your mouth,” was all you could say upon regaining lucidity.
“What'd I say about saying please?” He rubbed a knuckle against your mound; You tried desperately to grind on it.
"J-jason," You whined, squirming under him in impatience. He seemed to enjoy watching you writhe to the same degree he loved to annoy you.
Make. Me. Listen.
Technically the bet was still in effect. As long as you spoke to him with confidence, he would listen, right? You sat up, pushing him onto his back to straddle him. His eyes widened, flashing equal parts in anticipation and welcomed confusion as he ran his hands along your thighs and you could feel his length underneath you. You would take care of that later, but for now, you had your own needs to fulfill.
Jason attempted to meet your lips again, but you only pushed him back to the bed again.
"I… want to cum," You declared simply, trying your best to be confident.
"Yea?" He grinned. "I can help you with that. You gonna sit on my face or do you need to ask for permission?"
"No, just—it’s embarrassing," You said almost breaking character. Almost.
He rolled his eyes. "If y'wanna cum, you're gonna need to come closer."
You crawled over him, tentatively hovering above his face scared to accidentally crush him. Once you got into position, he pressed you down resuming his kisses and licks, moaning as he lapped from underneath you.
"Oh fu—I'm gonna cum," you whimpered unconsciously fisting his hair as you ground against him, using his face shamelessly to ride out your orgasm.
When you sat back on his lap, you felt something under some wetness under you. Had he cum just from eating you out?
"Be honest.” Jason was now catching breath, face glistening with your juices, with a dumb smile playing on his pink and swollen lips.
The pure sight of him—messy and pussy drunk—was enough to make you want to sit on his face again.
“You really did wanna fuck me so bad at Game Night.”
"You’re so full of it." You shook your head, humored. Leave it to Jason to crack a joke post-coital. Not that he wasn't incorrect.
“I'm so flattered you hump your pillow at night and think of me. Since you were riding me like one."
"Are you forgetting that you’re the one that lost the bet? I still have a good two months on you."
"Is that supposed to scare me?" He whispered absently rubbing circles into your hip with his thumb.
"Yes, it should. I can make your life hell."
"Oh really?" His eyes flickered from your lips and back up to your face. That seemed like a risk he was willing to take. From your seat on his lap, you could feel him growing hard again beneath you.
"Yes, really. I was going easy on you."
"You do realize you can’t make me do anything I wouldn’t want to do myself.”
"What about the DoorDash?"
"Well, I ate some of it."
"And the nail polish?"
"I happen to like that color."
Now it was your turn to roll your eyes, it seemed he had an answer for everything and his smile was growing wider to match every smartass retort.
"Just get over here." You missed the feel of his lips on yours already.
Finding no answer for that, he could only let out a laugh, "Yes, ma’am."
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©️ blackreaderfics // dividers by cafekitsune & poison-aesthetics
478 notes · View notes
write-tama · 8 months ago
Text
"to live with the milkman."
╰┈➤ francis mosses (the milkman) x doorman!reader
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sypnosis ; reader is worried because francis hasnt been seen in a week. they decide to pay francis' apartment a little visit..
containing! ; lois stilinksy, working as doorman, gender neutral pronouns, use of y/n, francis being a little sick and out of uniform, francis and reader eat mac n cheese tg :3
authors note ; this is lowkey a slowburn-- i didnt mean to write so much D: i started writing yesterday morning and just finished this morning LOL but ya its very just wholesome and soft ^^
4.12.24 | 2.7k words
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
As a doorman, you realize a pattern of people would often come and go through the apartment. You know who goes to work in the morning and who comes home in the afternoon, and you know what days they typically go out and days where they don’t.
So, I'm not totally creepy when I say I've noticed a shift in Francis’ schedule, right? He’s not one to typically go out unless he has work in the morning— which is usually Tuesday through Friday, but lately, I haven’t seen him all week.
Nothing but the worst truly went through my mind. He could’ve been eaten by a doppel, or worse, was mistaken for a doppel and was exterminated on sight! These anxious feelings went through my head as I nervously clicked my pen. I glanced at today’s list again, as if magically waiting for his name and picture to show up on the piece of paper.
click, click, click.
Through the office window, I heard the subtle steps of heels clicking against the worn tiles. Sighing, I sat up straight and folded my hands in front of desk, forcing my anxious thoughts to the back of my head in order to continue doing my job. I looked up to meet the gaze of thick magenta bangs with eyes barely visible I sort of wonder how she even navigates through her surroundings.
“Good afternoon.” She greeted, her thick lips curling into a polite smile. I nod as I took her ID and entry request through the letter box, scanning through the documents for any misspellings or misinformation. As I carefully examined the print, I notice Lois’ lips pursing into a curious point.
“You looked troubled, sweetheart.” She noted. “Is everything alright? Besides work-stress that is.”
I sighed a little, placing her card down before looking through today’s list. I checked off Lois’ picture before turning to my request checklist. “Yeah, I just.. I don’t know. Have you heard from Francis recently?” I asked, not even masking the worried tone in my voice. Lois hummed a little, as if thinking about the last time she has even seen the man.
“The last time I saw him, he looked extremely tired. Like more tired than usual. I think he was just coming home from work? He was coughing and sniffling a lot.” She recalled. “Poor boy.. He must’ve been sick for a while.” Lois shook her head. With her words I felt like a pressure had been released from my chest. Oh, good, so there is a chance he’s alive, I thought to myself. I slid back her ID and smiled.
“Thank you for telling me. I’m sorry, I just get worried knowing that a neighbor could’ve been killed by a doppel or any force of nature of that matter.” I lightly chuckled. Lois smiled, taking her ID before looking at me.
“You should talk to him. I’m sure he could use the company right now.” Lois suggested, but through that grin I could see that teasing smile.
I sighed a little, a little grin starting to form on my face. “C’mon, Lois, that would be way too embarrassing!” I exclaimed, crossing my arms in my chair. Lois lightly giggled, raising a white glove to stiffle her laughs.
“Oh, it won’t hurt, honestly! You never know what could happen~” she said, all singy-songy. I rolled my eyes before pressing the unlock button.
“Yeah, yeah. The door’s right there.” I sarcastically replied, a big grin on my face.
“Just think about it!” She called out as she walked through the door. I shook my head in amusement, listening to the door click behind her. I locked the door and returned to my previous slouched position.
Maybe I should pay him a visit.
My shift ended around late evening. I packed my bag and slid on my cardigan before locking the door behind me and hiding the key in a place only the next doorman would be able to find it. As I walked towards the exit of the building, I thought about what Lois had said earlier about paying him a visit. I never even really attempted to go past the lobby area of the apartment building. I had no purpose to anyway. And plus, it would’ve been a lengthy process to even request a visitor’s pass due to the security. I looked over to the doorman’s office, realizing that as of now, no one is on duty. Would it be morally wrong to go against the rules of the literal job I worked in?
Maybe.
But maybe my curiosity and anxiety could take over just for this one moment.
I walked back to the doorman’s office and unlocked the door. I placed the key back in its original hiding place before entering. I made sure to lock the door behind me before taking a look around the room again. Behind the doorman’s seat, there’s a door that leads to the stairway of the apartment complex. Its main purpose was to serve as a fire escape just in case of an emergency. Eagerly and swiftly, I gently pushed the door open, making sure to not make much noise. Once I walked out, I was met with the smell of old concrete and a spiral of stairs. I sighed to myself, remembering that Francis does in fact live on the third floor.
The stairs felt endless as my shoes clicked on the hard concrete. Fortunately, I only had to take a break only two times. I was finally at the end of the stairs, my legs tired from the endless climbly. I pushed the door open and was greeted with a typical carpeted hallway with blinding yellow-white lights that nearly burned my eyes. I sighed before trailing through the doors, looking at each number plate in order to locate the right room.
“Room 02, room 02..” I hummed to myself, just like how I would while scanning through files. After turning a corner, I was finally able to locate Francis’ room. I raised my fist to knock at the door, but the soft, soothing sounds of piano muffled through the wood. I stopped in my tracks, feeling as if my knock would disturb the perfect flow of the keys as I’m sure its song filled the apartment with grace. I waited for the keys’ song to slow to an end, the melody slowly fading out of the air and a sigh following its silence. I couldn’t help but smile, and sure this gave me enough proof that Francis was in fact still alive, but.. Something about his skills on the piano made me even more intrigued by the man.
I gently knocked with my knuckles, but making sure I was firm enough for the knocks to even be heard. From inside, I heard a chair scrape against wooden floorboard before footsteps steadily approaching me. A couple locks were undone before the squeak of the door filled my ears. I looked up and there Francis was— his eyebags were relatively darker and he was still in sleep attire with a baggy set of pajama pants and a fitting white tee.
“Oh— uh, (y/n)—” he said a little shocked to see me. I smiled a little, tilting my head at him.
“You shouldn’t have opened your door so fast. I could’ve been a doppel, y’know?” I advised. I heard him suck air through his teeth as he realized his rookie mistake.
“Mmm.. I’m sorry..” He mumbled, making me raise an eyebrow.
“You don’t have to apologize to me.” I said, leaning against the doorframe. “I’ve been worried about you since I haven’t seen you in a while. I just.. Wanted to check if you were okay.”
Francis raised his eyebrows in surprise. It made me wonder if anyone else but me paid him a visit due to his absence. We lingered in silence for a minute. he stared down at me as I stared up at him.
“..May I be invited in?” I requested, breaking the silence. Francis blinked his eyes a little, as if he had been lost in thought previously.
“Mmm.. ID and entry request, please?” Francis teased, smiling a little. I scoffed, immediately catching on to his wittiness.
“Ha ha, very funny, Mr. Mosses.” I sarcastically replied, rolling my eyes. His grin grew wider, clearly amused by reaction. He stepped aside from the door, allowing me to enter. I walked in, bag still clutched to my side as I took a look around the apartment.
It was humble but quaint space. The ceiling lights were off and frankly looked like they were never used, however, his lamps illuminated a soft warm orange on his furniture. He had a small box TV and dull red couch with a small round coffee table planted in the middle. Huddled in a corner was his old piano he must've been playing earlier. Francis closed the door behind me, making sure to lock it as well. “Sorry, it’s a bit of a mess.” He apologized, quickly rushing to his couch where clothes scattered over the armrests. He went down a small hallway I assumed to be where his bathroom and bedroom was. I took off my shoes and placed my bag on the table that sat next to the door before sitting myself on the couch.
I sighed a little, almost drowning into the soft pillows. It almost made me question why he would be struggling with sleep if he has a couch as comfortable as this. I could see a bit of his kitchen from sitting on his couch. It was a decent size with counters on one side and the appliances on the other. It seemed like he had something on the stove cooking as well.
Francis walked in shortly after and took his seat on other end of the couch, keeping a distance between the two of us. I brought my knees to my chest while hugging his couch pillows. I looked at him for a bit, trying to figure out myself as to why he hasn’t been out recently. Not only was his dark circles were more apparent, his hair was a little longer and messier. He looked paler than usual as well. Francis turned to me, a curious look on his face.
“Is it apparent..?” Francis asked. I furrowed my eyebrows, a little confused on what he meant.
“Hm?” I hummed in response.
“That I’m coming down with something.” He chuckled slightly. I shrugged a little, leaning back on the couch cushions.
“I mean.. Your hair is messier.” I smiled, admiring the frizz on the top of his head. Francis quickly glanced up before running his fingers through his hair.
“It’s not that messy..” He sighed.
“Well, I wouldn’t know. You always got that milkman hat on the top of your head.” I laughed. I glanced over to the kitchen again, realizing that steam was coming through the glass lid. “I think you might want to get that.” I suggested, nodding my head towards the stove. He hummed a little before getting off of the couch and heading towards the kitchen. I watched as he reached the top of the cabinets, stretching up with ease. I couldn’t help but stare at his broad shoulders to his slim waist defined by his white shirt.
“Hey, I made mac n’ cheese if you’d like a bowl.” He offered, his voice immediately cutting through my daze.
“Oh— uh, yeah of course. I was about to get dinner after I got off my shift but here I am.” I chuckled. He nodded before grabbing another platter to make my own plate. I sat patiently on the couch before noticing the remote on the coffee table. “Hey, can I turn on the TV?” I asked.
“Hm?” Francis hummed from the kitchen. “Mmm.. Sure. I don’t mind.” He shrugged before turning back to his task.
Something about this felt so.. Safe.. And homely. I felt comfortable, despite me never even being in Francis’ apartment before. It felt familiar, and I couldn’t lie to myself and say that this is the most peace I’ve felt since the news of doppelgangers came out. I picked up the TV remote and flicked it on, browsing through the channels before find a movie we could idly have in the background.
Francis came out of the kitchen, holding two bowls with forks in each. This time, he took his seat much closer to me before placing my bowl on the coffee table. “Thank you.” I politely nodded. I took the bowl and started to eat. Honestly, to my surprise, the food was actually pretty good for a man who worked day and night. I was enjoying the comfortable silence between the two of us as we enjoyed our dinner together— something I barely saw myself seeing tonight.
“Hey.. (y/n)?” Francis mumbled quietly.
“Yeah, what’s up?” I replied, taking another scoop of the creamy mac n’ cheese to shove in my mouth.
“Why did you.. Come here?”
Something about that question made my heart skip a little. Why did I come here? I mean— I came here to make sure he was okay. That’s my job as doorman. To make sure all of the neighbors are safe and alive. But even when I heard him through the door, clearly shown to me that he is still breathing, I stuck around anyway.
Why did I come here?
“Well— I uh..” I trailed off a little, sort of lost to where I should even begin. “I was just worried about you. That is my job, no?” I said, clearing my throat. I kept my eyes on the screen, a little embarrassed to even face him.
“Mmm.. I don’t entirely believe that.” He hummed. “You could’ve called.”
Oh, fuck, yeah no— he’s right.
Ugh, Lois!
You set me up!
“That’s true..” I chuckled. “I guess you caught me.”
“Mmm..” He mumbled. He placed his now empty dinner on the table before folding his hands in his lap. “So..?”
I took a deep breath, feeling my heart beat fast inside my chest and a warmth creeping up my whole body. I placed my bowl onto the coffee table as well, and finally mustered the courage to look at him in his eyes.
“Francis..” I mumbled. He leaned in a little closer, as if he wanted to lean into my words and trusted them to embrace him.
“I.. I just.. I think I like you..” I trailed out. My head felt cloudy as a tingling sensation danced all over my skin, feeling like a little kid during recess confessing to her elementary school crush. “I've liked you.. Ever since we met. I never really said anything because I felt like you weren't necessarily interested in a relationship.. But Lois and Rafttellyn would always point out how you would look at me and I just—!”
A strong hand placed firmly on my cheek— so cold against my blushing face— pulled me in to meet those soft lips of his. I was completely silenced and wide eyed, but I knew what he was telling me. Everything in those pink lips told me that everything was going to be okay, and he liked me just as much..
I fluttered my eyes closed, wrapping my arms around his neck, pulling myself closer to his chest. The TV buzzed in front of us, sputtering incoherent actors cracking jokes and delivering their lines. Our finished bowls of dinner were scattered on the table, but it was easy to tell the food was delicious for no piece of macaroni was left unnoticed. I pressed harder against his lips, letting the thought of breathing slip my mind.
If this is what it's like to live with him—
To spend our evenings chatting
Eating dinner on his couch
Watching TV while enjoying each other's presence
Then maybe I could get used to this.
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
tagging ; @crybabies-heart @shypizzaperson @your-local-oc-maker @spearsillustration @mochi46106 @seraphlin @glxyaaandromeda (some ppl i tagged either bc they followed me on my old acc and just some ppl who interacted with my past content and just thought they would be interested in this fic :3
thank you so much for reading and reposts and likes are always so, so appreciated <3
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rynbutt · 8 months ago
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pierced. pt. 9 | spencer reid.
Spencer wakes up in hospital and he's relieved to see you by his side.
you can find the other parts on my masterlist.
cw: fem!reader, hospital ward, mentions of gunshot wounds, stitches, bruising, etc. mild suggestive stuff.
a/n: im actually crying this is cute
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Spencer didn’t recognise where he was at first.
His eyes blinked open slowly, the beeping of the heart monitor being the first thing he heard. The first thing he felt was much worse, like he had been hit by a bus. He let out a shaky breath, his abdomen aching painfully as he tried to sit up. He froze when he heard a soft sigh beside him. It took a lot of effort for him to move his head, but he finally did and his heart warmed at the sight of you, sound asleep with your head next to his thigh.
You had your hand loosely over his, your other hand tucked under your head to make the uncomfortable sleeping position a little more comfortable. Spencer lifted his hand from under yours, gently running a hand over your head. The contact was enough for you to wake almost instantly.
“Spencer?” You mumbled tiredly, sitting up straight in the hard plastic hospital chair. You looked at him and felt tears come to your eyes when he tiredly smiled at you, his hand still resting in your hair. You let out a breath of relief, grabbing his hand and peppering it with soft kisses. “You scared me.”
“I love you too,” Spencer’s voice was weak, but he wanted it to be the first thing he told you. It was all he could think about while he was lying in the grass, staring at the sky. Despite the immense pain, thinking of you helped soothe him.
“W-What?” You wiped the tears from your cheeks, furrowing your brows at him. Of all the things you expected Spencer to say, it wasn’t that. You thought he might say something witty or start apologising.
“I love you too,” he repeated, a little more confident this time. “I didn’t get to tell you and I was scared I would never get to… after I was shot.”
You let out a breath of a laugh as you stood up, cautiously leaning over Spencer to press a kiss to his forehead. You were far too nervous to touch him anywhere else, fearing you would cause further damage.
“You look exhausted,” he mumbled.
“That’s what a girl wants to hear,” you retorted playfully, sniffling gently.
Spencer held your hand, “I’m serious. You should go home… These chairs are awful.”
“I wanted to be here when you woke up,” you replied, smoothing some of his hair out of his face.
“And I’m awake now,” he whispered, “you need to rest.”
“If anyone needs to rest, it’s the guy who got shot,” you chuckled, sitting back down in the hospital chair, still holding his hand. Spencer gave you a disapproving look, you waved him off, “I’m fine, Spence. Really.”
“At least eat something,” he sighed, rubbing his thumb over your knuckles.
“I’m fine-”
“I know you,” Spencer said, “you haven’t eaten since I’ve been out.”
You sighed in defeat, letting him gently cup your cheek, “I will go get the nurse first, then I’ll go get something to eat,” you compromised. Spencer knew he wouldn’t win with you so he agreed.
You pressed the call button, waiting for the nurse to arrive before you even thought about leaving Spencer’s side. She checked his vitals, assessed his wound dressing and asked him a couple of questions before leaving the two of you alone again. Spencer gave you a knowing look and you rolled your eyes with a smile, finally leaving to find something to eat.
You found a 24-hour Seven Eleven at the hospital food court across the road. You picked out a ramen bowl and a drink for yourself before you noticed the little cups of Jell-o in the fridge. Knowing it was Spencer’s favourite, you bought about four of them. 
Spencer was sitting up when you got back, a slight pained expression on his face. The nurse had brought him some food and Spencer was not a fan of crappy hospital food. Spencer dropped his fork on the overbed table, giving up.
“Not a fan?” You chuckled.
“Tastes like a boot,” he grumbled.
You giggled softly before reaching into your plastic bag of goodies, “well, lucky for you, I’m the best girlfriend ever.” You pulled out the little cups of red and green Jell-o.
“Oh, I love Jell-o!” He exclaimed excitedly, reaching for the cups of Jell-o. He leaned cautiously toward you, pressing a kiss to your cheek, “thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” you smiled. You watched as he winced in pain slightly, moving back to comfortably sit lean on the bed. “Be careful, please. I just got you back, don’t go doing more damage.”
“Right,” Spencer nodded, peeling the plastic from the top of his Jell-o cup. He shoved a spoonful in his mouth, humming in delight, “way better.”
Spencer spent another 2 weeks in hospital for monitoring and you stayed by his side the entire time. Despite your protests, he pestered the nurses and doctors until they got you a more comfortable chair to sleep in. You still stayed awake to make sure Spencer got some sleep, refusing to rest until you knew he was asleep himself. 
After giving him the all clear, the nurses and doctors gave you strict instructions to keep Spencer from hurting himself further and risk tearing his sutures. You knew getting Spencer to relax would be a mission in itself so you made sure to call Hotch to let him know and you took a full month off work to make sure Spencer was settled before you left him on his own.
“Guys, I can walk to the car,” Spencer protested as you and Morgan helped him into the car.
“Doctor’s orders, kid,” Morgan retorted, he looked at Spencer pointedly, “now, you’re going to listen to Y/N, right?”
“Yes, Morgan,” Spencer replied, rolling his eyes. 
“Thanks for this, Derek,” you said, tossing Spencer’s bag into the backseat.
“It’s no trouble, pretty girl,” Derek smiled, “call me if you need anything or he’s getting on your nerves.”
“Will do,” you laughed.
Getting Spencer to the elevator and down the hall to your apartment proved to be more of a mission than you anticipated. Once you pushed your apartment door open, little Tofu came trotting up to the two of you, meowing relentlessly as if she was questioning where the hell you two had been. 
“Tofu!” Spencer beamed as she rubbed up against his leg. “Mom and dad are home,” he cooed. It took everything in his power to not bend down and rub her belly, but he knew it probably wasn’t the best idea after he’d been shot.
You grinned at his referral of you as ‘Mom and Dad’ to your little fur baby. You helped Spencer to your room, helping him sit down on your bed. You kneeled on the ground, untying his laces (since he hated taking his shoes off with the laces still tied) and placing them neatly next to your much smaller sneakers in the closet.
“Alright,” you breathed, “I know you don’t like pain medication-”
“No,” Spencer warned. You knew what had happened a few years back and you never pushed him to take anything when he was in pain, but being shot sort of had unique circumstances.
“Oi,” you retorted, giving him a warning look, “at least take something mild so you can get some sleep.”
“Okay,” he sighed. You gave him a very mild medication, something you took when you had a headache or back pain. You knew it wouldn’t do too much but it would at least provide some relief.
“I’ll be just outside, call me if you need anything,” you kissed his forehead, helping him lay back in bed, pulling the covers over him gently.
“Could you stay?” he muttered softly, looking up at you with the most adorable puppy eyes. Your heart melted and of course you couldn’t say no to him.
“Okay, I’ll stay,” you whispered.
You crawled into bed beside him, fishing around your covers for the remote and putting on some random documentary.
“I’ve seen this one,” Spencer mumbled.
“That’s the point, Spence. If I put on a documentary you’ve never seen then you won’t go to sleep,” you chuckled.
“Fair enough,” he said with a small laugh. 
Spencer went quiet after that, a soft yawn pulling from his throat as he relaxed into your comfy bed. You tucked yourself in close to him, letting him rest his head on your chest as you played with his hair, trying to soothe at least a little of his pain. He dozed off shortly after that, your apartment proving to be far more comfortable than a hospital bed in a freezing cold ward.
It was almost 2am when you woke up abruptly. You sat up in bed when you heard something fall in your bathroom. Looking beside you in bed, Spencer was gone and you knew his stubborn self tried to do something without waking you.
“Spencer!” You threw your bathroom door open, your eyes softening as you saw Spencer with his shirt halfway over his head, his arms tangled in the fabric. You helped him pull it over his head before you began scolding him, “Spencer, you’re supposed to wake me!”
“...I just wanted to shower,” he frowned.
Your heart softened and you sighed, “Okay, I’ll help you.”
You turned the water on, keeping your hand under the running water until it was warm enough for Spencer’s liking. You helped him take his sweatpants off and you helped him into the shower. Your heart aching at the sight of his red abdomen. It looked like it hurt a lot. The bruising had gone down significantly since the last time you saw it but it still looked awful. The thin incision was far smaller than you’d expected, given the damage the bullet had caused to everything beneath his skin.
Your shirt began to get wet and you decided you’d just shower with him. You pulled your shorts off and kicked them to the corner, pulling your (Spencer’s) shirt over your head and tossing it aside too. You gently washed every inch of him with unscented soap, making sure to be extra careful around his stomach. 
Spencer leaned almost his whole body weight against you as you washed his skin. He felt remotely human again being clean, sick of the awkward sponge bathes he had to have in the hospital. You washed his hair too, the feeling of your fingertips scrubbing his scalp soothing the aches in his muscles. 
“Thank you,” he mumbled against your wet hair.
“You don’t have to thank me, Spence,” you replied, rinsing the soap suds from his hair.
Spencer loosely wrapped his arms around your waist just revelling in the feeling of the warm water hitting his back. You rubbed the back of his neck, your other hand tracing small circles along his back. The two of you stood there for a good 20 minutes before you finally turned the water off and helped dry him.
You gently patted his wound dry and put a fresh dressing over it. You grabbed a fresh pair of clothes for him and helped him into them before helping him back to bed, still adorned in just a towel. He sat on the edge of the bed and stared at you.
“I love you,” he said softly, grasping both of your hands in his.
“I love you too,” you replied, pressing a long peck to his lips. You let Spencer hug you close, pressing his head against your sternum with his arms loosely wrapped around your hips. You combed your fingers through his freshly washed hair, leaning down to press a kiss to the crown of his head.
He finally let go of you after you mentioned still being dressed in nothing but a towel. You hung both your towels up in the bathroom before stepping into your slightly cold bedroom to pick some clothes for yourself.
Spencer whistled from where he was lying in your bed, his eyes raking over your naked body. You rolled your eyes playfully, looking at him. “Come here,” he grinned.
“Absolutely not,” you retorted.
Spencer frowned, “why?”
“I think sex after a gunshot wound to the stomach isn’t the best idea, Doctor,” you teased, pulling a pair of panties on and one of Spencer’s shirts to wear.
“Who said anything about sex?” Spencer retorted childishly.
“You implied it.”
“Did not.”
“Did too.”
“Did not.”
“Did too- you know what? I’m not doing this with you,” you chuckled as you padded over to the bed, pulling the covers aside to lie down beside him. Spencer tucked himself close to you, lying his head next to yours.
“Only joking… sort of,” Spencer grinned.
“Mmm, thought so,” you laughed, closing your eyes to finally catch up on sleep. The two of you lied in comfortable silence before Spencer’s hand cheekily creeped up to cup your breast through the shirt you were wearing, you pried one of your eyes open, “Spencer…”
“Okay, okay, I promise I’m done!”
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a/n: i want spencer to fondle my tiddies :(
taglist: @crazycat-ladys-blog @cillsnostalgia @secretly-tumb1r @33-81 @elissanatok @outrunangelss @cultish-corner @666-gothic-bat-666 @evvy96 @littlemarvelstan8 @sarai-ibn-la-ahad @meg-black @dreamsarebig @anuncalledbridge @fioletowelowe @ladylincoln @spencereidsgf420 @bollzinurmouth @scarlettssub @ipseitydelrey @donttrustlove @mcntsee @ruziazyn @valinherfantasyworld @khxna @maybe-not-this @shardsofmarxx @danadinosaur3 @justsarahbella @ah-blossom @lorelaireid @btskzfav @reidsdoll @pinkpantheris @violetvsworld @readergf @pangirl-fangirl @emideadpoets @blackbeautyiloveyouso @feyresqueen @amethyst-marie368
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drvmekoo · 2 years ago
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logged on | jeon jungkook
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➳ pairing: businessman!jungkook x reader (f)
➳ genre: a little fluff, SMUTTTTT
➳ rating: 18+ (minors dni)
➳ warnings: mutual m!sterbation, dirty talk, jungkook calls the reader 'good girl' like ONCE. overall it's just really dirty and i'm sorry
➳ wc: 1.6k
➳ author's notes: this was inspired by jungkooks live a few days ago because GODDAMN he's so fucking hot.
➳ summary: you and jungkook try out facetime sex
-
“There’s my beautiful girl.”
The week had finally come. The week both you and Jungkook loathed every time it came around. 
Conference week. 
Not because of the never-ending conversations Jungkook had to endure with the most boring people on the planet. Not because of all the travelling and lugging around big bags full of new proposals for the company he had to deal with.  It was a week of being completely separated from each other. One was at home, tending to the house and other domestic needs while the other was miles away, stuck in a hotel room with nothing to do but wait until the week was over. 
Yeah, it absolutely sucked.
Jungkook smiled fondly as your face popped up on his screen. The hotel room he was staying in had never felt more unhomely and cold until now. “How’s it going baby? What have you been up to? Have you eaten today?”
“Hey babe,” You chuckled softly at his curious expression “Everything is ok! Haven’t been up to much since you’ve been gone, just been cleaning and tidying.” You lifted up your meal in shot of the camera for him to see “I’m also eating right now as we speak actually!”
“Ugh, I’m so glad. I was worried you’d starve without my expert chef skills in the kitchen.”
You rolled your eyes and giggled “Oh please, I don’t think toast is ‘expert chef’ material.”
“Hey!” Jungkook exclaimed “You already know that toast I made for you last week hit differently!”
“Butter on toast hits every time! It’s not anything special!” 
He pulled a shocked expression. “I thought you said everything I made was special? Wow, babe low blow!” He exaggerated a shot to his chest as he grabbed it and slowly fell out of shot. “I guess, I should just go. This big red button is looking so tempting right now…”
Suddenly your snickering stopped. “Don’t you dare, Kook.”
“I’ll do it.” He teased, lifting himself up so that he was in shot again “You’ll have to wait to see this beautiful face until the end of the week!” Smiling slyly, he made his action obvious that his mouth was hovering over the ‘hang-up’ button
“Koook, please don’t! I missed you and I've been waiting all day to see you.” You pouted.
Straight away, a massive smile exploded across Jungkook’s face. “Oh princess, you have no idea how much I’ve missed you today. Like God, I wanna be with you so bad.”
“You only have two days though, right? Not too long!” You expressed “And then you can come home. You already know I’ll be waiting for you.”
Jungkook beamed through the screen. He wasn’t sure if it was just because he missed you or if it was just the lighting over on your end but he couldn't tear his eyes away from you. Even through the screen, everything he loved about you glowed. You were absolutely beautiful. 
“Hello? Are you frozen? Kook, can you hear me?” You contemplated through the screen at Jungkook’s dazed expression. 
“Hmm?” He was ripped out of his daydream “Oh..yeah sorry angel! I was just… looking at you. You’re so beautiful.”
You blushed and covered your face “Babe stopppp! It’s embarrassing when you say that!”
“What? I can’t tell my girl that she’s gorgeous? Try me.”
You rolled your eyes once again behind your hands. 
“Princess, please move your hands. I wanna see you.” Jungkook pleaded the soft serious tone back in his voice. You removed your hands. “That’s a good girl. There she is.”
You smirked at the nickname “Well now I know what mood you’re in.” 
“What are you talking about?”
“Oh don’t even try it!” you laughed lowly “I know you well enough to know that when you call me that, you’re horny.”
Now it was Jungkook’s turn to blush “I have no idea what you’re on about. I’m feeling completely normal!” 
But of course. He was lying. Underneath his trousers, he was absolutely rock-hard. It had been only a few days since he left you. And here he was, craving you from miles away. 
“Uh huh sure..” Suddenly an idea popped into your head. A very naughty idea.
“So…if I was to take my shirt off right now, you wouldn’t bat an eyelid right?” You smirked, slowly starting to lift your t-shirt. 
Jungkook’s adam's apple bobbed as he was met with your braless figure. Your tits sat there so prettily as his cock twitched in his pants. He bent his head back and sighed “Fuck babe….what are you doing to me?”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about!” You mocked him from before. “It’s just so hot in here and I needed cool down.”
“Such a fucking tease…” Jungkook mumbled as he too started to undo the buttons of his shirt.
You grinned. The pit in your stomach grew at the sight of his lean torso, his muscles contorted as he finally opened his shirt. Already, Jungkook started to palm himself through his bottoms as you slowly removed your own sweats.
“Fuck babe, I’m so fucking hard.” He sighed as you were now left only in your underwear. Like him, you stroked your clit through the skimpy fabric, exhaling at the feeling. 
Jungkook’s own breathing sped up as he finally pulled his throbbing dick out of his confined pants. “I need to cum babe…Fuck look at you. Yes, that’s right touch that pussy for me baby…imagine my fingers..”
You moaned lightly at his lewd demands, rubbing harder at the fabric at the sight of his cock now in his hands. 
“Fuck, Kook... I miss you so much..” 
Jungkook growled, “Oh angel you have no idea….how much I miss you….” His hand sped up around his length “The thought of your sweet mouth wrapped around me right now….mmm fuck!”
At this you slipped a finger inside your underwear, touching yourself to the moans and groans of your boyfriend. The feeling of your bare fingers emphasised the pit in your stomach and you threw your head back in pleasure. 
“That’s right my girl, touch yourself for me. Imagine those are MY fingers.” Jungkook slowed down significantly on his length “Fuck baby, the sight of you right now….gonna make me cum…”
“C-cum for me babe….” you managed to get out, your own pleasure eating away at your ability to speak.
Minutes went by that were filled with the two of you moaning and grunting through each other's computer screens. Jungkook bucked his hips suddenly…”B-babe…I’m cumming…fuck!” 
Ribbons of white sprouted from his cock and landed on his bare torso. Mouth held open, he continued to slowly stroke himself. 
You soon followed with your own orgasm, shoots of pleasure running through your body as your fingers continued to work at your clit. You didn’t care that Jungkook was watching you ride out your orgasm. It felt too good.
After you had finally finished, Jungkook was just getting done with wiping the cum off of his tummy. “Wow babe, that was great.” He chucked the dirty tissue in the bin beside him and started to button up his shirt. “Of course, the real thing is SO much better but watching you cum like that? I wanna make that my wallpaper.”
You blushed, fishing your own shirt off the floor and putting it on. “Stop it, you know how embarrassed I get!” 
“I love you.” He chuckled. “Anything you do, I’ll find so fucking hot.”
“Good!” You beamed “I’m very glad….OH FUCK.”
“What? What’s wrong?” 
“My food got cold!”
-
taglist:
@swga-ficrecs
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blood-red-ocean · 11 months ago
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can I request Mother Miranda next? i have this silly idea where MM's crow(s) has a habit of stashing all kind of shiny things near reader's house. Maybe she has a small porch that's not been used cause reader doesn't have time lounging around, and the sneaky crow is, like, yeah, this is perfect, and so reader goes about her life non the wiser to crow's shenanigans behind her back until one day she hears some sound outside and goes to investigate which ends with her stumbling upon MM rummaging through pile of... something. Awkward silence.
I don't know why I saw reader's house and immediately went 'ah yes, they live with Miranda' but ANYWAY enjoy <3
Small Thief (RL!Miranda x Reader)
Word count: 1.9k Warnings: None Summary: Cornelius is a sneaky lil gremlin.
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“Babe? Have you seen my keys?”
Overturned couch cushions and the contents of upturned cabinet drawers laid in the wake of your frantic rummaging. The very thought of having lost a set of keys to the headmistress’s house scared you enough, but it would be even worse if you had not simply misplaced them and had dropped them somewhere on the Campus. Especially with Mia’s habit of being an absolute gremlin and showing up unexpectedly in places she wasn’t supposed to be.
“Hmm?” Miranda strode into the room, hand fiddling with the button on the other wrist of her shirt.
“My keys, babe, my keys. I need them.”
You knew what was coming immediately. You knew it so well that you could almost quote her word for word. “Now, what did I tell you about carelessly tossing your keys down, little crow?” She and you both knew that if she had spoken those words to anybody else, it would have seen as harsh chastising. But you knew her better than that, and you could easily pick up on the way her mouth quirked up at the corners. The Miranda version of a playful grin.
“Forget about your keys, darling mine,” She said, striding over to you to kiss your cheek. “I will be awake when you return, I’ll let you in.”
“Andy, you know I’ve got class till late tonight.” Miranda smiled a little more visibly at the nickname you had picked for her – Devil Wears Prada had quickly become her favourite movie to watch with you, and she didn’t hide her blush fast enough when you called her it playfully for the first time while playfully testing out different variations of her name. Mir, Mira, Andy… “Professor Dimitrescu is making us recreate a classical piece in our own style.”
“That’s… Out of character.” Miranda frowned a little. “Very well then. I’ll still let you in.”
“But—”
“I’ll be awake.” Miranda gave you a pointed look, and it hit you then. Of course she would be awake – without you around to help with the growing pile of student council paperwork, full of requests and grievances that were above even Bela’s station, she would no doubt spend considerable time poring over them, with Cornelius on her shoulder. She often turned to work when you weren’t around.
“Okay, fine,” You said. You reached up and caressed her cheek, a playful smirk growing on your face. “Just don’t drool on the papers when you fall asleep this time, okay?” This earned you a tut from Miranda.
Hours later, and back aching from spending hours at an easel, you trudged into Miranda’s – you and Miranda’s – house, dropping your bag at your feet. You leaned back against the door and groaned, rolling your shoulders slowly to relieve some of the tension. The smell of pizza wafted down the hallway and into your nostrils, stomach growling angrily. “Oh, fuck yes,” you breathed, following the scent like a cartoon character. There, on the kitchen counter, laid an open box of your favourite pizza, and a note beside it which stated, in Miranda’s elegant cursive, “I am in my office. Come find me when you have eaten, little crow.”
Pizza slice in hand, you navigated the house, making your way to her study. The door was propped slightly open, and a gentle push on it made it swing forward, revealing Miranda bent over her home desk as she pored over some paperwork.
“Pizza?” You asked, holding a piece out.
Miranda crinkled her nose a little and shook her head. “Not tonight, Feather. I don’t think I have the stomach for it right now.” She tapped her fingers on the top of the desk as she sat back, peering at you with concern. “Are you alright? You seem exhausted.”
“Because I am,” You mumbled around a mouthful of cheese, sauce and dough. “Dimitrescu made me restart my piece three times. Three times! All because I mixed the pigment slightly wrong.” Miranda kept tapping her fingers one by one, the familiar sound almost mesmerizing you – almost.
Click, click, thud, click. Click, click, thud, click.
One of her golden finger guards was missing, the soft thud of her bare finger hitting the wooden surface jarring against the clicking you were used to. “Hey,” You spoke up, frowning. “Where’s your guard?”
Miranda shifted uncomfortably, hesitating. “I have no idea,” She eventually admitted. “I removed all of them earlier to take a bath, and when I turned back, one was missing.”
“Ah, so the great Miranda doesn’t have eyes in the back of her head after all.” Miranda shot you a playful glare, affection vaguely hidden beneath. “I’m sure it’ll show up somewhere.”
“It is rather… Concerning, that things keep going missing around here. I’m not usually this… Disorganized.”
“You aren’t disorganized at all,” You reassured her, licking the grease from your fingers. “Maybe we have a ghost.”
Miranda rolled her eyes lightheartedly at that, returning to her work. You grabbed your books and papers, settling in on the couch opposite her desk to study. Yeah, you were exhausted, but you still had other classes to study for, and not even being romantically bound to the headmistress would give you endless exceptions when it came to your studies.
***
Weeks passed, hours and hours of late classes beginning to make you feel burned out. You spent the days counting down to when it was finally done and you could spend your time with Miranda again – and quicker than you thought, it was over. You left Professor Dimitrescu’s class with a heavy wooden frame in hand, a begrudging A+ grade, and a sense of smug accomplishment. You couldn’t wait to get home and tell Miranda all about how Alcina had squirmed, heaving sighs and muttering as she scribbled an A+ onto the piece of paper before her.
Upon arriving at home, however, Miranda was nowhere to be found. Propping the frame up against the wall, you dug your phone from your pocket and checked it – no texts, no missed calls. Venturing deeper into the house, you peered into Miranda’s study to see it empty and dark. Brow furrowed, you ventured even further into the house. It was unlike Miranda to not tell you where she was – or rather, command that you go and be at her side.
“Andy?” You called out. You peered into darkened rooms, intrigue growing as you saw parts of the house you hadn’t seen before. Between the rush of moving you in with her, and exam season, and Alcina’s late classes, you had barely had time to spend sitting quietly with your avian goddess, let alone explore the depths of the house.
Just as you were about to give up and try and call Miranda, a crashing sound came from the very back of the house. Pulse rushing in your ears, you immediately jumped to alertness, searching for something to wield as a makeshift weapon. Eventually settling on a discarded iron poker, you held it aloft as you took slow steps towards the crashing sounds. You eventually came upon a glass door, a faint glow emanating from behind it. With one hand on the doorknob, you took a deep breath and threw the door open, roaring.
“RAAAAAAARGH—Andy??”
Once the frantic flurrying of wings and dark feathers and Miranda’s cursing had died down, you could get a proper look at the small room you had entered. It was covered in screens rather than windows, and it took you a moment to realise it was a porch.
A porch filled with heaping miles of miscellanea, remarkably less organized than the rest of the house. Miranda stood in the midst of it all, her face flushed and scowling… At Cornelius. Eyebrows raised, you glanced between the two of them, taking a step back. Cornelius let out a rather loud, indignant caw, wings lifted at Miranda.
“You! She hissed, pointing her finger accusingly. “I knew it!”
A glint in the corner of your vision caught your eye, and at a single glance you heaved with relief.
“My keys,” You breathed. “Thank the gods—” You reached out to pick them up, and the fluttering of wings signaled Cornelius’s arrival. He stood with one foot on them, staring up at you with one burning yellow eye. It hit you then that this wasn’t some secret that Miranda kept, some uncharacteristic habit – no, Cornelius had been periodically stealing more and more items over the weeks, stashing him where he thought nobody would find them. You reached out again to try and take the keys, but he just cawed softly at you, clicking his beak.
“Hey, what—”
“You have to give him something else,” Miranda grumbled, sifting through the heaps of shiny objects. “I learned that the hard way.” She tapped her earlobe, and you noticed that one of her dangly gold earrings was missing, no doubt wherever Cornelius had stashed it again. On her finger was the golden finger guard, back where it belonged.
“Well, I don’t have anything shiny,” You spoke to the small thief. “But… You want my A+?” You held out the piece of paper with the grade and Alcina’s comments on it, and Cornelius studied it for a moment. With a quick chirp, he grabbed it from your hand and flew off to the back corner of the porch, no doubt to stash it somewhere safe. Miranda watched him with her mouth agape and threw her hands up in exasperation, calling after him, “Seriously? I feed you! I raised you from a baby! And they can give you paper?” Miranda took a breath as if to continue, then stopped, turning to you with raised eyebrows. “Did you say A+?”
Grinning, you nodded quickly. “Yep! Can we get pizza to celebrate?”
“Again, Feather? Aren’t you tired of it yet? I could order you something much nicer—”
“Nope, pizza,” You called out, moving back into the hallway of the house. Miranda followed you, pride in her eyes.
“Very well, then,” She sighed in mock exasperation. “But first, show me your work.”
There was a skip in your step as you led Miranda by the hand back to the entryway, where you had placed the painting. You held it up to her and watched as her eyes conveyed her emotions – surprise, awe, pride and then, as she gazed back up at you, love. “It’s beautiful,” She murmured. “We must display it at once.”
You followed her as she went to the kitchen, opening a cabinet and pulling out a small golden hook, and a nail. She hummed as she roamed the house, trying to figure out where the hang your artwork, and you blushed about it. Eventually, she settled for hanging it above her desk in her study, this simple gesture making your heart skip a beat, reminding you again her how she loved and prioritized you. She reached up, preparing to nail the hook into the wall, when a dark blur rushed by and left her hands empty. She growled a little under her breath and chased after it, leaving you in fits of giggling as she went.
“Cornelius! Get back here with that!”
To nobody’s surprise (but to Miranda’s chagrin), it only took the promise of some head scratches from you to get the hook back from the small thief. You could’ve sworn he gave an approving caw at the sight of your painting, as well.
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be-missed · 1 year ago
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Not Strong Enough (Chap 8)
Jenna Ortega x Fem!Reader
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(pictures not mine)
Summary: Jenna was visiting her mom in the hospital to drop off the food that will be eaten for the hospital party, but she met a resident surgeon and she thought "God forbid I ran into an accident, but I want her to open me and stitch me up." While the surgeon tries her best to keep her fan girling low-key.
Warning: curse words. Also I'm not that knowledgeable when it comes to accident or prognosis of a physical trauma, so I tried to be logical about it.
A/N: Last chapter for my first series. Thanks for reading this piece and the support you gave me.
Masterlist
Chap 1 | Chap 2 | Chap 3 | Chap 4 | Chap 5 | Chap 6 | Chap 7
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Chap 8
Y/N with her worried face, heart beats so fast, hands become so clammy, and her blood raised. She faces Natalie, waiting for her answer on where Jenna is. She doesn't care if she showed this much of an emotion in front of Jenna's family or in front of everyone that she has worked with. She only cares about how Jenna is and where Jenna is.
A closing of the door can be heard from the surgery room inside the emergency. Beatrice walked towards them with the stern face that she always carries when she's working or after her surgery. But being her closest friend, you know that this is not just her every day stern face nor this is not just her work face.
You tried to restrict yourself from rushing to your closest friend, so you stand still in your place, while Jenna's family walked towards Beatrice. Standing still from where you are, you don't know if you want to hear the news that Beatrice will tell or if you want to just live your reality and believed that Jenna is okay.
From where you are, you see Natalie hugged her husband and her siblings smiles. That enough comforted you, knowing that Jenna is fine. Before Beatrice has her chance to walk towards you, you ran to the nearest elevator, gladly enough it opened when you pressed the button and chose the highest floor of the building.
Inside the elevator, you don't know what to think, hell you don't even know what really happened. But by knowing that there are a lot of people inside the emergence with minor to major injuries, it's a car crash, a big one. The elevator dings and you strode your way out the metal box and went straight to the edge with the railings.
Looking at the city from above, everything looks so small. But the pit that you have in you stomach is big, heavy, and is eating you out. You are an overthinker, so you will think every possible scenario that you can think of. Jenna helps to calm the thoughts down, but not right now, when she's the one you think of.
Before you jump in your thoughts, a hand pats your back. "She's fine" Beatrice says to reassure you, knowing that you bolted out before she can even get close to you. "She needs a surgery since she got a big cut on her forehead, she also got some brain injury because of the impact from the crash but nothing serious; her car received the greatest impact."
"What's your prognosis?" Y/N asked Beatrice, trying to compose herself and not breakdown. Jenna was the first girl she have ever loved truly and they just got together a few weeks ago, she can't lose her, "Tell me the truth, Bea." Y/N begged.
Beatrice lets out a deep sigh, "Nothing that serious, she needs to rest for a month and let her brain regain its health and recover from the trauma and injury. It may have some side effects, but nothing that she can't face" Beatrice explained to her friend even if she knows that Y/N knows what happens to this kind of case.
"Thanks Bea" the only words that came out of Y/N's mouth, "There's no problem with that, I was also shocked when I saw her getting reeled inside the emergency. Go to her room, I know you want to see her and she needs you" Beatrice replied.
"I just don't want to lose her, I don't think I can handle not having her in my life" Y/N said and Beatrice hugged her friend and reassured Y/N "You didn't okay, she's down stairs waiting for you, I'm sure of it. Just wait for a couple more hours or a day before she regains her senses and be awake. She needs a lot of rest, you know that." Beatrice left Y/N alone and went down.
The girl stayed looking at the night sky or the cars honking below, after getting all the willpower that she needs, she goes down and went to Jenna's private room. Inhale, exhale, she knocks at the door and Natalie opens the door for her.
"Hey, there you are, come in" Natalie ushers her inside, "She's been resting for quite some time now, her vitals are also stable. She's going to be okay" Natalie assures Y/N and gave her a hug.
"I know she will, she's a fighter like her mom" Y/N said and smiles at Natalie. "I'll just just go and get us snacks" Natalie said getting her wallet and heading outside the room.
Walking slowly, noticing how Jenna looks so fragile with the tubes that connected her to a machine and the gauze that is plastered on the side of her forehead. Y/N wants to check every vital signs that Jenna shows just to makes sure that the other girl is okay, but she restrict herself. She reminds herself that she is here as Jenna's girlfriend and not her doctor.
So what she did was, she held Jenna's hand and hugged the girl that was sleeping. Trying to listen to Jenna's steady heartbeat and the warmth of her skin. Trying to be as delicate as she can be, Y/N situated herself and seated by the stool beside Jenna's bed.
Natalie saw the two girls asleep, which she is thankful for, she knows that the both of them needs a chance to regain strength and God knows how much rest they need after what happened.
Rustling from around her woke up Y/N from her slumber, hand still holding Jenna. Looking around she see Beatrice and the nurses that came in to check on Jenna's vitals and to give her more pain relievers. "She's doing fine, she just needs to rest more, we also injected some pain relievers so that when she wakes up today, she won't feel a lot of pain." Beatrice and her team walked out of the room.
"Uhm, I'm just gonna go get my coat in my office, I have a shift in 2 hours." Y/N said to Natalie that gave her a nod and a smile. Walking to her locking room, Y/N prayed, which she usually don't do. She knows know that desperate people do try to find faith, so here she is now, praying.
After getting herself ready and now wearing her white coat, she sits in Jenna's room, silence settles in the room with them, looking at Jenna or trying to busy themselves with other things. A stir on Jenna's bed broke the quietness inside the room. Jenna tried to move and sit down but a gasp of pain stopped her and made her collapse to her bead.
Natalie went to assist her daughter while Y/N pressed the call button for the nurses and doctors. While Natalie tries to help Jenna drink some water and assure her daughter that she is okay, Y/N walks towards them and a smile breaks in her face, seeing how Jenna is okay and now awake.
Jenna looks at Y/N, full of curiosity and a glimmer in her eyes, Jenna thought "If I were in an accident that lead me to this, I hope she was the one that cut me up and stitches me back up." Amusement can be seen on Y/N and Natalie's face.
Natalie broke the silence and said "Oh honey, you were in an accident but she's not the one that performed a surgery on you" with a chuckle, Jenna then looked at her mom and realized that she voiced that thought out loud. It earns a chuckle from Y/N too, "You're funny, you know that?" Y/N said and walked towards Jenna and holds her face, which Jenna froze.
It made Y/N pull away and said "What's the problem? Is there something wrong? Does it hurt?" Jenna shakes her head "No, it's just, it's sudden, you uhm... you touched my face like I'm your girlfriend or something.. probably my doctor?"
"Her girlfriend or something?" "...probably my doctor?"
It echoed through Y/N's mind, what is Jenna talking about, yes of course she's in an accident but...
Oh,
Oh,
Oh...
Right, Beatrice told her that Jenna's car got the greatest impact and she received a brain injury and trauma, but Beatrice didn't tell her that the trauma affected Jenna to this extent. She was frozen in her position, trying to compose herself. Jenna's mother gets close to them and says "Honey, what are you talking about? It's Y/N, do you not remember her?"
Jenna just shakes her head again, "Oh.. uhm.." Y/N can't speak a word, she was angry, sad, and surprised. She was angry at the world for doing this to them, she was sad for what happened to them, and she was surprised that amnesia was an outcome to Jenna's accident. Which she think is impossible, but... if the impact was that great just like Bea said, then it is possible.
Y/N awkwardly coughs to break the tension and said "Uhm, yes, I'm uh... your doctor. I'm here to check your vitals" Y/N said to not worry Jenna or surprise her. Y/N then started to walk closer to Jenna's bed and started to check her vitals on the machine. Trying so hard to not her tears to fall down.
Y/N is not facing Jenna but she can feel her stare burning through the side of her face. Scared to look at Jenna's face, she then holds Jenna's hand where needles are inserted to check if there are any blood flow.
"Do you really think I'll forget about your pretty face?" A voice broke Y/N's melancholy and looked up the girl who is sitting at the bed wearing a cheeky smile on her face. With a confused look that Y/N gave Jenna.
"Do you really think that I'll forget your pretty face?" Jenna repeated herself, "What... I thought..." Y/N can't say a word. With Y/N getting confused on what's happening, Jenna cups Y/N's face and kissed the girl hard on her lip. Before Jenna can let go, Y/N placed her hand on Jenna's nape and deepen the kiss, now realizing what's happening.
Jenna's mom cough from the other side that broke the kiss, "I'm sorry, Nat" Y/N said while she gives the older woman a shy smile. "I'll leave you two to talk, okay. To TALK" Natalie said and gave a big emphasis on the word "talk" that earned the both of them a giggle.
"What's the meaning of this?" Y/N asked perplexed, "I got you good, huh?" Jenna said with a smirk on her face. "Wow, I can't believe this, I don't know if I'll be angry at you or be thankful that you are okay" Y/N said teasingly at Jenna.
"Oh please, don't be angry at me" Jenna said with a pout on her face trying to be cute. "You know cuteness would not get you anywhere, right?" Y/N said and Jenna answered "Well, there's nothing bad in trying right?"
Y/N seats at Jenna's bed, "Are you really okay? Did you not get hurt somewhere? Beatrice said that your car got the greatest impact" Y/N said while trying to caress Jenna's face. "Just body pains and my head, nothing more. Yes, my car did received the greatest impact, but hey, at least we know now that my airbag works" Jenna answered trying to lighten the mood.
Y/N smiles at Jenna feeling relieved that nothing happened to the woman that she loves.
"I love you, you know that?" Y/N said, before she realize what she just said Jenna replied "I know. You know that I love you too, right?" with a cheeky smile.
"I know" Y/N said, realizing that what she have right now is what she wants in her life. To love and to be loved. She can't believe that months ago, she was too afraid to shoot her shot and fearing that she wasn't strong enough to be Jenna's lover.
But here they are now. There are much more things that will come to them, but they both know that they got each other to face incoming battles that life will give them.
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END.
A/N: Again, thank you so much for reading and supporting this story and me. Your likes, reblogs, and comments did help me a lot to continue writing. There's a new series that I'm working on, which is Find You Again. See you on my next stories.
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cheesus-doodles · 1 year ago
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It's funny lowkey for me whenever you write about the reader being unable to resist the tears and puppy eyes because since I'm the third oldest out of ten (oldest daughter, just number 3 in the line up) I've become immune to puppy eyes and if my own siblings can't work that on me I doubt that the Founders could. So I was wondering how you think said Founders would be like if Darling was immune to the puppy eyes, especially if said Darling is like me and has a bunch of younger siblings >:3c
Immune to puppy eyes+multiple younger siblings anon here, feel free to ignore that though if it isn't a prompt you want to do! No pressure at all!
aksjdnaskjdnas finally getting round to answering some of the older asks ;-; sorry it takes so long y'all - just disappointed in myself today cause I hesitated to buy Izzy's standee and in that moment he sold out ;-;
Masterlist
Upon reflection, the Toman founders really are like younger siblings huh. Maybe not so much Draken, Mitsuya or Pah, but definitely your needy trio of Mikey, Baji and Kazutora who would be as good as clingy younger brothers with separation anxiety. Or maybe more so like puppies, but same difference in the end.
I think it would only take just the first visit to your house and a glance at all your younger siblings clamouring for you to help them with something for the realisation to set in with the Toman boys that no amount of tears or puppy eyes would work on you. No doubt Mikey and Kazutora would still try, but the boys would be quick to turn to other means to wring out what they want from you.
Draken and Mitsuya find out quickly that annoying you into giving in and doing what they want works pretty well - after all, Misty himself has two younger sisters and he knows what buttons they usually push to get him to do things for them. Though they personally don't want to whine and plead (they are still delinquents with some measure of pride after all), they know who will, and young kids are easily bribed for their help. Sets your younger siblings on you with a small bribe of sweets and with their help, would ultimately manage to force you into doing whatever the two Toman boys wanted just to get the hassling and pestering to stop. Sometimes even pretend to step in to help you stop the non-stop disturbance so that you can get your homework done, no doubt putting them in your good books. High fives all around, no doubt Draken and Mitsuya are the more popular pair around your place.
Mikey and Kazutora, on the other hand, have no such dignity left when it comes to you. The two of them would definitely still try their tears and puppy eye combo a few more times just to be sure it doesn't work before they switch tactics. Would do literally anything to get your attention and affection on them, even if it means blackmailing you - stealing your homework and holding it hostage, refusing to leave the bathroom whenever you need it unless you pinky swear to spend time with them afterwards, dragging you out of class and straight up sitting on you and not moving. Tears and puppy eyes were the easier option if they were honest, but whatever works ain't stupid. Your siblings couldn't get to you when you are in school, but they can, and these baby boys absolutely will, threatening to kick up a fuss and disrupt every class if you don't let them lay on your lap and cuddle. Tried to give you some of their favourite snacks as bribery but obviously didn't work cause they were all half-eaten, so back to disruption they went.
And then there's Baji and Pah - the two who have individually consulted outside persons and have come to the same conclusion. Baji would have asked his mum on advice on how to steal your attention (she thinks he's trying to get a girlfriend), while Pah will ask Peh, and the two airheads will end up bribing and buying your time and attention. Baji would take advantage of the community cats that he cares for and invite you along to feed and play with them whenever he could - none of the other Toman boys can get as close to them as he could, and he knows all the good spots too. The community cats let you pet and rub them since you were with Baji, and this baby boy would use the opportunity to get your attention and affection. Pah is the best out of the six at arcade games, so buying your time with games and prizes was no brainer (or at least that was what Peh told him) - you did enjoy winning a ton while with him, and he got to hang out with you with no complains, so its a win-win.
End of the day, it just makes life more difficult for you if you were immune to their crying and whining, so my recommendation would be to play along when its convenient and encourage the behaviour rather than let the boys come up with their own idea of how to get your attention: the more things doesn't work out, the more desperate the boys become. Wouldn't be long before one of the more desperate ones get the idea that if they hurt themselves, you would be sure to pay attention and fuss. Or worse, if they took out the number of people who wanted your attention, then you'll have to give time of day to them - so maybe just give them the pats and forehead kisses they want and they'll be happy to be nothing more than your clingy baby siblings.
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elderberries-and-honey · 6 months ago
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Today, was a very important day. Today, was the day that all of Lawrence's preparation and planning would finally be put to the test. Today, he was meeting with Mr. O'Doyle; a wealthy investor who was known for his hand in most of the profitable businesses around Windenburg.
As Lawrence stood in front of the mirror, he attempted to fix himself up to the best his ability; he hoped his hair that often refused to remain tidy would miraculously stay put, and that all of his long hours practicing his speech had somehow spun it into perfection.
He was absolutely enthuzimuzzy, feelings of both excitement and anxiety churning in his blood. 'Deep breaths,' he reminded himself over again, his chest expanding wide on the inhale, 'this will work,' he told himself, exhaling his worries for only a moment.
"Atticus, please, just one bite for Mummy." Winifred's voice said from within the dining room, breaking his concentration; and just like that, his moment was up.
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All morning long, Winifred had been battling her infant son and his refusal to eat a single bite of breakfast.
"My darling, I thought we talked about you letting Dorris do more of the feeding." He noted dryly as he fastened the shiny brass buttons on his sleeve.
His wife didn't even bother to look up from her sulking, instead she simply stared straight ahead at the little one who was doing everything in his power to avoid a mouthful of lumpy porridge.
"When I want your advice on how to feed my son, Lawrence, I'll ask." She replied bitterly.
He sighed, now crossing his arms. For several days, her tone had such bite to it; icicles seemed to drip from every word, piercing his skin each time she opened her mouth. He had chalked it up to exhaustion over their youngest growing in his first few teeth, but that didn't mean it wasn't painful all the same.
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He watched her rise from the table, and take baby Atticus into her arms, lightly bouncing him up and down. After a few moments, she softened her jaw and apologised as she had done many times over the last few days.
She went on to explain that Atticus was running a small fever, and had not eaten anything solid for two days. As she spoke, he listened calmly and felt his defensiveness already falling away, understanding what she was trying to say.
She was thinking of their first and only daughter, Florence, whose skin had burned hot to the touch and refused to take to her mother's breast, ultimately resulting in her untimely death. It did not take a genius to know that if he himself was being plagued by images of their daughter's face, her burning red cheeks and puffy eyes from incessant crying, his wife was remembering the same.
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He hesitated for a split second before speaking, weighing the impact her choice could have if she agreed, before telling her, "I don't have to go. I can stay here with you if you need me to, my love."
Relief washed over him as she shook her head in refusal, noticing how stiff his shoulders were before relaxing them a bit.
"I'll be home before you know it," he reminded her, wrapping his arms around both her and Atticus, "until then, just try to relax. Let Dorris help you."
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After he let go of their embrace, he sighed and turned on his heel to head towards the front door and out into town, while Winifred hummed soft lullabies under her breath behind him.
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boytumms · 9 months ago
Note
Jae Anon here!
I had an idea that popped into my head after seeing something from, if I remember correctly, marmalade-draws. I could be wrong. But basically, a spell or a piece of jewelry or something is enchanted/cast to make anything Person A eats appear in Person B’s stomach.
Here’s my twist on it. It works both ways. So Person B can eat and it’ll appear in Person A’s stomach.
Enjoy!
~
Oliver prepared his suit and tie to attend his sister’s wedding. As he did so, he had an idea.
“Hey Elijah! Come in here for a second please!” Oliver called out, smirking a little as he heard his boyfriend’s footsteps.
“What’s up Oliver?” Elijah asked, leaning in the doorway. He raised an eyebrow as Oliver handed over a small necklace.
“So you know how I’m into stuffing? Well, I thought it would be fun if you could do it while I was at my sister’s wedding. Then we could have fun when I get back,” Oliver said, smiling as he put a matching necklace around his neck and tucked it under his shirt.
Elijah couldn’t help but smirk at the idea, putting the necklace on. He was very excited for this.
“You betcha. But how do you want to let me to know when to stop? I doubt you’ll have time to look on your phone,” Elijah said, a little concern showing in his voice.
“I’ll drink something so you feel it in your stomach. It’s the quickest and easiest way to do it. I’m gonna be late if I stall any longer. Start whenever you feel ready,” Oliver said, placing a quick peck on Elijah’s cheek before running out the door.
Oliver made it to the wedding with time to spare. As he sat in his seat, waiting for something to happen, he was surprised that Elijah hadn’t eaten anything yet. He went almost the whole wedding without feeling anything.
When dinner was served, Oliver decided to get a little payback on Elijah. He ate almost nonstop taking thirds and fourths on his plate. By the time he finished the fifth plate, he started feeling his stomach begin to get full.
Oliver sighed quietly as he rested his hand on his stomach, excited to feel himself being stuffed. It took a minute, but he felt his stomach become uncomfortably full. Elijah must’ve been taking some big bites because Oliver felt his stomach swell with each one.
Oliver was soon nearing his maximum limit, his stomach growling in response. It wasn’t noticeable yet, but his round belly was beginning to push on his buttoned dress shirt. Oliver took a glass of water and quickly drank it, becoming worried when Elijah didn’t stop. Oliver quickly got up and said his goodbyes, blaming it on an early work day for tomorrow.
Oliver ran to his car and hurriedly started it, groaning as he felt his suit begin straining against his stomach. He quickly unbuttoned his shirt and suit, not wanting to ruin it by popping the buttons. Oliver unzipped his pants, frowning as his stomach easily settled into the open space. As relieving as it was, he was not enthused, despite feeling turned on by the experience. Oliver drove as fast as the speed limit would let him, letting up belches and groans as he did.
By the time Oliver arrived home, he could barely get out of his car with how heavy his stomach was. He looked like he could easily be six months pregnant. The stuffed boy waddled his way into the house, using his hands to hold his stuffed belly. Even then, he could feel mouthful after mouthful of food being shoved into his already strained tummy.
“Elijah! What the heck?!” Oliver exclaimed, closing the door behind him with a huff. In front of Elijah on their coffee table was still loads of food, all meant for Oliver.
“I was napping when you rudely gave me this food baby, so I figured you could use a couple food babies in return,” Elijah said with a grin as he caressed his swollen, bloated abdomen. He immediately chugged a two liter soda, eyes intently on his boyfriend’s stomach.
Oliver groaned as he lowered himself into the soft couch, his stomach swelling and gurgling with the soda. He put his hand up to ask his boyfriend to stop, but Elijah was intent on watching Oliver wriggle uncomfortably. As time went on, Elijah watched as Oliver moaned and groaned with his growing abdomen, clearly stuffed beyond what he was used to.
Elijah decided to stop when Oliver looked nice and round, a record of looking nine months pregnant. He took the necklaces off them and smiled at his boyfriend, taking to gently rubbing and caressing the swollen, red tummy of his boyfriend.
“Now I feel kinda bad. How about next time, you can go to an all you can eat buffet and fill me this full for a change?” Elijah asked, working out bubbles for the little bit of relief Oliver could get. Soon enough, the stuffed man fell asleep. Elijah put a blanket over Oliver, returning to his original seat.
Elijah looked at the pile of food that was still left, deciding to eat the rest so it wouldn’t go to waste. After a couple hours, Elijah sat back and marveled at his stuffed belly. He wasn’t nearly as big as Oliver, but he was close. His shirt stayed snuggly on his stomach, unable to move from the sheer amount of pressure from his bulging stomach.
Elijah now felt really bad for Oliver, feeling what he went through and now understanding his boyfriend. He soon succumbed to his food coma, snoring softly as he lay next to Oliver. The next day was a chore, both still being overly stuffed and bloated. Elijah made sure to tend to Oliver, ignoring his own pains and setting to help relieve Oliver of his.
Awww, these two sound so cute!!! Constantly in a cycle of getting revenge on each other for stuffing one another too much, then feeling bad and coming home to sooth their poor partners over stuffed belly
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heyidkyay · 9 months ago
Text
And I'm petrified of being alone, now |
Part Eighteen
Matty Healy x reader
Summary: She’s just trying to get by, really. What with being a single parent to her four year old son whilst simultaneously trying to kick start a successful career as a radio presenter. She’s got everything she’s ever wanted though, friends close by, a mum who’s merely a phone call away, and of course her baby boy. What else is there to wish for? But then, it’s not long before her relatively normal life gets upended and turned on its head, and she’s suddenly forced to deal with situations she’s never even thought to imagine.
What happens when one mention of a certain controversial singer on her show sends a flood of unexpected challenges her way? 
Authors Note: Hey!! Finally here with another part! This one took a while to write but it's here now. Hoping you enjoy it:)
> Last update: look back here if you'd like!
Masterlist
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He’d been pacing on the phone for quite a while now.
Back and forth up the long and narrow pavement sat outside of the small cafe we’d chosen just off the highstreet. His feet skimmed the curb every few steps, I noted, his brow furrowed and lips pursed too whenever he rattled something back to whoever it was on the other end.
“Eggy, mama?”
I blinked at the sudden voice, tearing my eyes away from the window and Matty, and back over to where my food-happy toddler sat in the adjoining highchair.
With a fond smile, I shook my head at his proffered bit of hard boiled egg. 
See, Matty had fancied a couple of soldiers when we’d first walked in, forgetting all about his earlier promises of bacon, and Teddy had unsurprisingly followed his lead. Looking down at his plate now, I was pleasantly pleased to find that he’d eaten the majority of it.
“I’m okay, Teds. Thank you though.” I told him, wiping a few breadcrumbs from his cheek with a napkin before tickling the underneath of his chin, “You’re such a sweet boy, you know?”
He bared his teeth at me in a giant grin, “Very much, ta.”
Chuckling lightly at his silly reply, I shook my head once more, “Back at it with the ta, are we?”
Teddy replied with only a stern nod and a wrinkle of his mouth, then dug back into his breakfast again, content to just watch Matty and the few cars that passed by the window.
It was a strange concept for me to wrap my head around- the whole Teddy and Matty thing, I mean. 
Teddy had always been an affectionate kid, a bit shy with newcomers and strangers at times, but his heart was huge and he had a lot of love to go around. Still, with that being said, the dynamic he’d struck up with the curly headed singer was unlike anything I’d ever witnessed from him before. 
With Adi, Teddy was always perfectly content to find new extremes and test them. Pushing boundaries and buttons simply because Ads was the biggest pushover known to man- at least when it came to him. 
Each moment Adi spent with Teddy she always ended up looking spent by the time she was about to head home, almost like he’d gone and dragged her through a circus tent full of performers and animals alike. 
Then there was Finn. Finn had been a constant presence in Teddy’s life since the day he was born, he was my best friend and was always there to lend a helping hand whenever I needed it. The two of them were close in their own way, Teds felt comfortable with Finn, he didn’t question his authority or throw a fit when the man put his foot down, but whenever I was around the pair of them together Teddy made it quite clear that Finn was the third wheel amongst the lot of us. 
Which was funny in its own way, I supposed, because I knew how Teddy looked at me. I was his mum, sure, but I was also his dad, too. Merely in the sense that Teds had never looked to anyone else to fill that role for him, I was what he had been given and I was all that he needed.
Yes, there had been the odd question or two when Teddy had finally started to understand films and tv shows, and again when he had started nursery school and seen all of the other kids with their mums and dads. But he had taken my honest answers on the chin and shrugged off any other prompts I’d had for him afterwards, as though he was perfectly untroubled by it all and the fact that he only had a single parent.
Then again, a few of the kids in his class faced similar problems.
Oliviette had only ever really known her dad, since her mum had sadly passed when she’d been too little to remember. Tury’s father worked in the military, or something of the sort, and was divorced from their other father. He went away for long stretches at a time and had only ever come to pick them up once in all the time that we’d been in attendance.
Zara was another young mum like me, we’d bonded over that fact a couple weeks into the school year when a few of the other parents had wondered over the whereabouts of our partners and then turned up their noses at us when they’d received their answer. 
Which led me straight back on over to my anxieties about Teddy, and how he might come to soon view Matty. As well as the question on whether Matty could even handle being seen in that sort of light, or if he’d run swiftly for the hills with his tail tucked between his legs.
These worries had started up quite quickly after seeing those articles we’d faced earlier in the week, which had only added fuel to the fire for me. Some of the headlines still haunted me and my waking thoughts, in truth. They flashed through my mind on a giant billboard sort of screen, visible for all to see.
JUNKIE ROCKSTAR TURNED FAMILY MAN!
A NEW LINE DRAWN FOR HEALY?
THE 1975 SINGER AND HIS HIDDEN FAMILY..
It was both a startling and terrifying experience to suddenly start considering the opinions and views of the entire world around you, which now appeared to be watching us under a microscope, reading into each and every move not just Matty and I made, but Teddy now too.
It was ultimately why I had run and hidden when it had all come out, choosing to avoid the whole situation at hand rather than face it head on and be met with a plethora of questions I hadn’t yet thought about.
But then Matty just had to have gone and sent me that fucking demo.
I’d been all but putty in his hands after that really. 
And the very thought of not just the previous night, but this morning too, had me flushing in the middle of the cafe Matty had taken us out to. ‘My treat,’ He’d said, and it had all felt so natural. Him being in my bed, in my shower, in my house, around my kid.
I heaved a heavy sigh before picking up my mug of tea, wrinkling my nose in distaste when I found it had gone cold. It made me wonder just how long I had been lost in thought.
That question was answered for me though when Matty came strolling back over, the crease in his brow there and then gone when he took to his seat once more and caught eyes with Teddy. He flashed the boy a bright smile, “Enjoyin’ that, monster?”
Grimly, Teddy opened his mouth up wide to show Matty just how much he had enjoyed his breakfast and laughed when Matty mimicked the expression, the man leaning in close enough that Teddy could only laugh giddily.
“Made a big enough mess of it.” I commented with a soft smile. 
Even with all my fretting I still couldn’t get over the way Matty treated my son and how Teddy responded to him in turn. It was incredibly surreal.
When I’d first gotten pregnant and decided to go it alone all those years ago, I thought that had been it for me. That there was no way any person, let alone anyone in Matty’s position, would just come along and be able to deal with the fact that I had a child. This whole other being that would always fall above everything else.
But here that somebody was.
Sat with my toddler, looking at him almost the exact same way I did. With such adoration and emotion. 
The sight made my heart both lurch and crumble all at once.
I pulled myself out of my head once more with that thought and tuned back in to find our waitress making her way over again. She was a sturdy looking woman, not much older than my mum if I had to guess, and had taken more than liking to the messy toddler she’d been shafted with early this morning, “Anything else I can get for you, lovelies?”
I opened my mouth to tell her that we were fine, seeing as though Teddy was all but finished, just chewing on a few pieces of buttered bread, and my sandwich was merely straggling bits of crust now. 
“Would be great if you could get us another round of drinks to go?” Matty piped up before I could answer her, circling a finger between the two of us. “Cheers.”
The waitress dipped her head at him and flashed a warm smile my way, “One tea and a strong flat white coming your way then.”
I was surprised that she’d recalled our order so easily, since I’d noted earlier that there were a few other patrons she’d been serving, and so I thanked her gratefully with another smile before she walked away, arms laden with a few of our used plates. 
“You didn’t have to,” I said to Matty shortly after, then dipped my chin down towards my remaining cup, “But thank you anyway, this had gone cold.”
Matty rolled his eyes, a gesture he was rather prone to using whenever he thought I was being unnecessary, but then shuffled over to settle more comfortably in the seat opposite me, leaving his phone to rest on the table between us.
“Sorry I was long, but after management, Jamie rang.” He confessed to me, and that scowl of his appeared for a split second or two before disappearing completely when he glanced back over at Teds, who was now playing with his food rather than eating it. 
It was almost automatic the way Matty moved to steal the backpack hanging off the arm of the chair perched beside him, pulling out a few of the baby wipes I usually kept there before beginning to clean up Teddy’s face and hands. 
I could only stare on in utter bewilderment, watching it all play out even whilst Matty continued to speak to me, clearly none the wiser to the way my brain had just short circuited at his actions.
“Anyway, they’re on it- or so they’ve said. But I know this whole thing is just a charade to them, yeah? Management, I mean. Not J. ‘Cause he’s already said that he’s trying to keep them from going too extreme with the whole clean up, claiming that they appeared to be warming up to the idea of me becomin’ this ‘changed man’ or some shite.” Matty scoffed with a roll of his eyes at the very thought, then pulled a face for Teddy who admonished him for his use of a ‘bad word’, and cleared away some of the mess that had been created whilst he’d been gone.
I swallowed thickly at the sight, thankful for the moment of reverie I was gifted when our waitress shuffled back on over, two to-go cups in hand as well as the bill.
“Ah, are we all clean then?” She cooed down at Teddy, moving to grab the last of what remained at our table to take back to the kitchen with her. 
Her expression brightened when Teddy not only shot her a mischievous grin, but also wiggled his fingers up to show her just how clean they were. Matty snorted.
The woman peered between the two of us afterwards, plates tucked into the crook of her elbow whilst both of our previous mugs sat cradled in the other. “You’re a lucky pair, he’s absolutely golden.”
My pulse spiked at her words, or rather what she’d interpreted our little excursion as, but before I could think to offer an explanation, or anything rather, she was already shuffling away again. Teddy batting a hand at her back in goodbye.
My gaze slowly drifted away from her retreating form and over to where Matty was now slouched, but he didn’t seem to have noticed her words, or perhaps he just didn’t care. Still, I blinked slowly at him, “Did you hear that? Did you hear what she just said?”
He pulled his eyes away from a now babbling Teddy and shrugged slowly, “Yeah?”
Yeah??
Sorry, come again? 
Had I actually heard him right?
I almost choked on the force of my next inhale. “That’s it? Just- yeah?”
Matty stared back at me, expression almost blank- calculating, in truth. As though he was trying to determine which of his next words had the ability to set me off even further. I sort of hated that.
“What do you want me to say?” He asked me slowly, elbows moving up onto the table’s top and pressing against it to lean in closer to me. 
His eyes never left my own, and it was then that I noticed the sturdy wall behind them that I thought had crumbled between us so long ago. He was wary now, building it back up again in hopes that I wouldn’t wound him- anymore than you already had, my mind unhelpfully supplied.
I licked at my lower lip, mostly in thought but also because my throat had suddenly gone dry at the very reminder.
It had been necessary, I told myself. Space and time, that was all that we had needed, and look at us now!
Look at us…
“I just,” I murmured, swallowing thickly whilst still staring into those hardened eyes which remained locked on mine, “It doesn’t bother you at all?”
That steely look softened when he snorted and the bricks in that wall of his began to chisel away at themselves once more. 
Matty slumped and I watched on as his gaze flickered back over to my son, who was now much more interested in the straps of his highchair rather than either of us. 
“Why would it?” 
Matty’s words were as gentle as his tone and his smile was just as sweet, and all I could think about in that moment was the abating panic I felt and the sudden need I had for him.
Shouldn’t it? I wanted to press, it would bother a hundred other men. What makes you so different?
He glanced back at me then with a languid turn of his head, “Guess it just makes me feel worth something, even if it’s a mistake on her part.”
Matty must’ve seen the way my face fell so quickly at his words because he chuckled lowly and then gifted me a small but pivotal smile. He reached out to toy with the hand I’d been resting on the table, fingertips trailing over whitened knuckles. 
“I’m just being honest, alright? He’s a good kid, anyone can see that. I mean she did, din’t she? And then, there’s you, Squeaks.” He dragged that last bit out, flipping my hand over so that he could trace the lines of my palm with the tips of his fingers. “You’re something else.”
I frowned slightly at his words, a little puzzled. Matty only laughed at the face I must’ve made before he finally took my hand wholly in his, thumb brushing over my ever rising pulse.
“If she reckons I could land someone like you long enough to have one of these little ones running round, well… Just makes me picture it, 'is all.”
I could feel the contents of my stomach whirl at his given answer and tightened my hold on Matty’s hand by a fraction, needing the certainty that he was in fact real. That what he had said was very much real too.
“Squeaks?” Matty pressed after a short while. I figured I must've been quiet too long for him to prompt an actual reaction from me. Either that, or he’d gotten bored of my gaping gob far too quickly.
I attempted to swallow around the hardened lump in my throat, but it was difficult. “Yeah, just-” I struggled to fathom the mere idea that he had thought about me in any scenario at all beyond the past six months we had shared. “You’ve actually thought about that?”
Matty rolled his eyes at me, and although his smile was warm, it held a fragment of uncertainty to it that told me all I needed to know.
“I’m getting old, darlin’. Normal to think about that kind of shit, ain’t it?”
That was a very Matty thing to say and my rapid pulse slowed a tad because of it, giving my poor pounding heart a break.
“Yeah, but with me, Matty.” I felt the need to stress, because it was only yesterday that everything had come to a head between us. It made me question how long he’d been holding off on me- had he been waiting, is that what this was? Had he been trying to get over whatever he felt for me? If so, what had changed his mind, or forced his hand?
He simply chuckled and shrugged, like it was no big deal.
“Yeah with you, Mouse.” Matty confirmed, squeezing my hand once more before letting go completely and swiftly getting up out of his seat to unclip Teddy from his highchair. “Wanna go pay with me then, little man?” He asked Teds and it was only when Teddy had been swept up into Matty’s awaiting arms and Matty had looked over at me to tell me he was going up to the till that I realised he had used my kid to escape the current conversation at hand.
I shook my head in disbelief and tried to steel myself into something a little more put together once he had left, instead of choosing the imminent breakdown my mind was rooting for. I couldn’t lose my shit with all these people around to bear witness. Because I could do that later, couldn’t I? In the comfort of my own home. Right now I just needed to…
Fuck, I could not actually believe that Matty had pictured a future with me. A. fucking. future. 
One that was ours.
The same stupid man that had told me time and time again that he would get headaches simply from thinking of the next few days to come, that he hadn't seen much of a life for himself the older he’d gotten. Even with all the money and the fame. 
My stomach was swarming again, just like it had done when I’d heard the demo for the first time.
I wondered, briefly, whether those butterflies of mine were instead moths merely looking for any source of warmth they could find, and if Matty could really be exactly that. My little bit of warmth.
“You coming then, Squeaks?”
I glanced up again to find Matty now grinning down at me, Teddy still bouncing happily on his hip and the spiderman backpack thrown halfheartedly over his right shoulder. 
I gaped for a split second at the picture they painted and then nodded, smiling up at this maddening man with all the warmth I could possibly muster. Hoping that somehow, someday, that little dream of his came true.
“Yeah, I’m coming.”
It had probably been one of the most content mornings Matty had had in a long time.
He knew that for a fact, but still felt stunted by it all the same.
It had been years since he’d woken up without the immediate dread, or the itching need for a fix that even now sometimes still jilted him awake. And the night previous? Well, he’d gone to bed thinking of tomorrow, hadn't he? 
Stupidly, he wondered what his mum might make of that. If she’d be surprised, wary even. Or maybe just happy for him.
He’d been gifted some precious time and some precious people and he did not want to waste a single second of it. Although that could have hardly been avoided, what with the way management were constantly up his arse, hounding him incessantly about everything under the fucking sun.
The three of them had set off for food not long after he’d had a lapful of sleepy mouse first thing, they’d danced around one another whilst getting dressed, Matty watching as she brushed her hair and then catching her eye when he had attempted to wrangle an overenthusiastic toddler into his coat and boots. 
Matty had walked hand in hand with Teddy all the way to his car, letting the kid jump his way down the few short steps from the house and up into the car seat he’d borrowed from Adam a week or so after Christmas. Mouse had snorted at his shitty parking job, then granted them a full blown crackle when she’d torn a parking ticket from his front window screen only to have found a real unfortunate note from an unhappy neighbour beneath it.
Apparently Matty had to work on his spontaneity if he didn’t want to end up falling out with the bloke who lived two doors down from her. Even as he winced, he reckoned the guy was still a fucking nobhead.
He’d driven down a couple of backroads, letting the radio play and rolling his eyes fondly whenever Squeaks deigned it necessary to comment on his driving- “It needs work, Matty. I mean, you almost took out three of those bollards!” “Ah, a bus! Bus, Matty! Bus!” “Are you actually aiming to kill us, or do you just reckon you're the next 007?”
Matty had managed to get them all there in one piece, like he knew he would, and led the two of them all the way to this odd-spot cafe he’d found a couple months prior.
It was a simple dive, tucked quietly away amongst the noise of London, and was almost always chock-full of white haired pensioners or folk who didn’t much care to note who he was.
They’d sat down, Matty taking his first chance to ask for one of them highchairs he typically saw little kids sat in at restaurants, and then they’d ordered; Mouse getting what she deemed was her morning usual, whilst Teddy had mimicked his own request.
It had been cute, Matty had to admit. Especially when Squeaks had shot her son a dubious look, stating that he hadn’t tried it before, what with her being too scared she’d plague him with salmonella or something of the sort from how shoddy her attention was with the passing of time. Matty promised to teach her.
The little tyke seemed to have enjoyed it though, all but ravishing the yolks from their casing and munching on the sliced bread til it had either disappeared or simply gone soggy.
The only interruption they had faced was the unexpected call from his management team, and then Jamie’s which had followed not a minute after.
It had been a right nightmare. 
In fact, the whole of last week had been a total disaster. His team had been on his case the minute those articles had all been released, Twitter threads spiralling out of control and fans losing their minds over whether or not it was all fake or not.
And Matty, Matty had tried and failed not to let it get the best of him, but with that and the loss of Squeaks and Teddy, who had retreated almost entirely from his life. It had left him with a wound big enough for him to question everything. 
Matty shook his head then, a shit attempt at ridding himself free from his neverending train of thought, and looked up with a soft smile when Mouse wandered back into the living room and handed him a brew.
He’d never been overly gone on tea, to be honest- coffee worked wonders and with hours like his, it was now a necessity. But hers? He could never say no to, which was rapidly becoming a habit now. So much so, in fact, that he’d noticed himself wanting one at the oddest times of the day; down at the studio, in a meeting, the middle of the night…
Yeah that last one had been fucking strange. Half three in the morning and he’d been up puttering around his kitchen unable to sleep once the idea had taken root in his head and settled. Hadn’t been half as good as this though, Matty sighed thoughtfully as he sipped away. 
“So…”
His eyes immediately flickered back up to meet her, sitting all pretty on the end of the couch, an arms width away. “So.” Matty mimicked, raising his eyebrows then smirking at the way she shuffled in her seat and tried to hide her growing smile.
“We should talk.”
That smirk of his slipped right off.
He coughed slightly to clear his throat, but mostly to buy himself some more time, and then decided to get it on over with, pushing his brew onto the coffee table so that he could better face her. “Right, okay.”
She was chewing on her lip, a habit she seemed to have had ever since he’d first known her, but one which continued to drive him half mad. Even more so now that he knew what it fucking felt like to have her under him.
His tongue swiped his bottom lip instinctively at the reminder of it.
“You said it too,” Mouse reminded him, sounding almost accusatory. 
He had, but even so, it was still fucking awkward to just talk about shit. Couldn’t they skip to the good bit? Where he slowly took her apart piece by piece on the sofa she’d have to pass by day in and day out. A constant reminder of him even when he wasn't there.
“Matty.”
Matty blinked out of his daze at the call of his name and his eyes shot upwards to find her looking back at him with a furrowed brow.
“We don’t have to talk right this second, but I’d prefer if we did.” She told him with a slight shrug, eyes flickering away from him and across the room almost nervously. “‘Cause, at least I’d know where we stand, you know?”
Pursing his lips slightly, Matty tilted his head at her, “What’s that meant to mean?”
She shrugged again, sheepish almost, which wasn’t much like her. “Just, you’ve grown on me, Matty. I wouldn’t want to fuck up our.. friendship  over something like this.”
Matty knew what she was getting at there and it did hurt a little bit to think that she reckoned he’d fuck up what they’d built, what she’d given him, for a quick shag or whatever it was she’d filled her head with. 
But still, he gave her an impish grin once he’d shuffled his way a little closer, throwing an arm over the back of the settee. “Awh you finally admitting that we’re friends, Squeaks?” He teased and laughed when her foot flew out to toe his side.
“Bit more than that since yesterday.” Mouse murmured, giving him a snide smile before she released a heavy breath and settled her own mug down alongside his own on the tabletop. “But yes, we’re fucking friends, Matthew.”
Matty’s nose wrinkled but he didn’t comment on the use of his full name, instead stretching his fingers out to toy with the leg she had pressed against the back of the sofa. He lifted his eyes to watch her, saw how her own gaze rested on his hand and her knee.
“Good. Only took you, what? Six months.” He ragged but the smile he wore was pleased, dopey even. Stupid enough that he knew if one of his mates turned up and caught sight of it they’d probably rinse him to bits, claim he looked a right tit. But Matty couldn’t bring himself to care. Not then.
She rolled her eyes, but he noted how she was smiling now too.
“I’ve always thought you were fit, you know?”
A laugh escaped her then, brash and unforgiving. Matty would’ve been wounded had he not known her as well as he did. So instead he simply chose to flick her knee in harmless rebuke. “Don’t be a twat. You said you wanted to talk and I am. You’re fucking fit, Squeaks. Don’t let nobody tell you otherwise.”
She merely shook her head at him, the smallest smile limning that pretty mouth of hers.
“I’m being serious.” Matty tapped her knee twice with his fingertip, wanting her attention, “I wouldn’t lie to you, you know that.”
He recalled one of their earlier conversations and hoped that she somehow remembered, ‘I was raised by liars, can't stand lies.’ 
She licked at the corner of her mouth, eyes trained on him as though she was searching for something in his expression, but ultimately nodded when she didn’t appear to find it. 
“Anyway,” Matty smirked, leaning his head against his shoulder and continuing to hold her eyes, “Yeah, so I walked in expecting the usual. Some yappy older bird, who reckoned she was above me and all my fucking shit. Or maybe even someone who’d break and fall back on what they’d said once they were stood facing me. But nah, just you.”
“Just me.” She chuckled in that easy lilt of hers that he’d always found so soothing. In truth, he could actually recall asking her question after question in those first few weeks after they’d met just wanting to hear her talk.
Matty dragged out a hum, “You don’t even know. As soon as you walked out I was on you like a hawk, I swear. Just watching as you walked over, could hardly take my eyes off your legs.”
She snorted, “My legs?”
With a grin, Matty caught her ankle with his free hand and dragged her leg into his lap. “Fucking killer.” He told her honestly, letting himself have this moment to trail his fingertips up and over her thigh. “Then you looked at me with those eyes,” Matty’s own shot up to find them once more and shook his head slightly, “Made me dizzy having your full focus. Never seen a pair so intense, like they’d been struck by lighting or something.”
She rolled those pretty eyes of hers then and Matty pinched her leg, “I’m being serious, Squeaks. One of my favourite things about you.”
Thankfully she glanced back over at him then, her cheeks a tad bit pink but her smile bright. “I like yours too, you sap.” Matty's expression must’ve given way to how he felt about that because she was all too quick to add, “Don’t get cocky about it.”
He chuckled, liking the fact she knew him too well, and finally let his hand rest on her upper leg, though his thumb continued to rub gentle circles into the curve just above her knee. “I obviously felt something, Squeaks. Why the fuck else would I show up outside your studio only days later?”
“‘Cause you’re a stalker?” She teased but had relaxed further into the settee, stretching her other leg out to join the one he held. 
Matty ran his fingers up the underside of her foot in retaliation to that comment, “Brave.”
She snickered, “Thought you were just ‘in the area’?” 
Matty bit back a grin at her use of his earlier words, remembering how he’d been brimming with nerves whilst waiting outside for someone to show.
“I was,” He sniffed, and was pleased when she simply laughed. “But the truth? I couldn’t stop fucking thinking about you.”
Her cheeks hollowed themselves out as she tried to dampen the growing grin that threatened to overwhelm her face. It broke his heart a bit to know she struggled believing him, that no one else had ever gone far enough to drill the fact that she was fucking beautiful into that thick head of hers, but Matty was nothing if not stubborn and he’d strive to always tell her just how gorgeous he thought she was.
“What was it with that girl then?” She mentioned and Matty immediately frowned, confused as to what she was even going on about. “Your ex.”
Matty felt himself blink, mind reeling as he tried to remember what the hell she was referencing, but then it hit him. “Oh, ohh!” Then he chuckled, unable to help it really, and couldn’t seem to prevent the way it then dissolved into a slightly uncontrollable fit of laughter.
She levelled him with a hearty scowl and went to remove her legs from his lap, obviously none too pleased about being laughed at, but Matty stopped her just before she could.
“No, no, Squeaks. Babe, you’ve got it all wrong.” He attempted to console even with his still amused smile, leaning in closer now, his hands settled on her calves. “That was just for the press! Management team reckoned it would be good to rebuild my image, and I wasn't long out of rehab. She and I always looked good together but fought like fucking cat and-”
He stopped short and she snorted, “Mouse?”
Matty squinted his eyes mockingly, “Yes, dickhead. But no, it was all fake. Was only with her fifteen minutes before she swanned off to a photoshoot or something. Harldy even fucking remember it.” He paused then, “Hang on, is that- Is that why you went all quiet on me back then? That time before I ran into you at that bar?”
The way she evaded his gaze told him all he needed to know and then he was laughing again.
“Shut up, you absolute prick.” She huffed after a minute or so, having grown fed up with being his main source of amusement, and swatted him with her foot in hopes it would get him to follow the order. 
God, he’d never seen her look so embarrassed. 
“It’s not funny. You never mentioned it either, so what was I supposed to think!”
“Uh, not that?” He suggested, still chuckling away but actively trying to get it under control, sort of. “I’m sorry!” He laughed again when she kicked him, “Honest! But the thought didn’t even cross my mind. And we were hardly even mates then!”
She looked chastised, “We were mates!”
He levelled her with a look.
She held out for a bit before she finally huffed, “Fine, it was rocky but even so.”
Matty snorted, “No, you know what? I sort of like this side of you.” He teased, wrapping his hands around both her ankles and tugging. “Suits you.”
She sent him a well deserving glare, which was fair, before she dug her heel into his upper thigh, far too close to his dick for his liking, and sat herself back up again. “You’re such a twat.”
“So I've been told.” He sang, though he then rubbed at his tender leg with a wry grimace, “Shit, remind me not to actually piss you off.”
Squeaks shot him a grin and relaxed back into their earlier position. 
Her phone went off then and Matty watched on as she manoeuvred herself awkwardly around on the sofa to grab it from her back pocket without getting up. He raised a brow at her triumphant grin but she just looked down at the notification she’d gotten.
“Everything alright?”
She hummed, typing something off before looking back up at him and tucking the phone away again. “Just Finn, says he’s back home tomorrow and wants to see us.”
Right… the infamous Finn Matty had yet to actually meet.
“Where’s he been?” He asked, toying with the cuff of her jean leg.
“New York!” And the smile that she’d answered with told Matty a thousand things, “He had an auction up there or something, then ended up staying a few extra days to meet with this elusive client.”
“Shady.” He commented with a humoured smile, one he hoped would conceal his insecurities around the whole situation. 
He’d heard a lot about Mouse’s best mate, and these worries weren’t just down to the fact that he’d yet to meet the bloke, but also because Finn seemed to be such a big figure in not just hers, but Teddy’s lives. He’d been away a lot in recent months and Matty wondered over whether his presence would throw a spanner into the works once he was finally let back into the fold. 
“Very much so,” Mouse laughed, none the wiser to the chaos consuming his mind, “But I’m excited to see him, it’ll be good.”
Matty merely hummed.
She must’ve sensed some apprehension in it because she turned to tilt her head at him, playing with her fingers now. “Would-” She paused and Matty looked up to wait her out, she inhaled after a moment and then let the breath go, “Would you want to meet him? Or is that, I dunno, too fast?”
His forehead pinched and he shook his head. “No, not too fast.” He deemed, though he could’ve just lied and put off meeting the bloke for as long as he possibly could.
“I mean, we don’t have to put it in writing or anything.” Squeaks was quick to reply, “He’ll be around for a few weeks now, so we can just, I don’t know, work something out soon. Like meet at a cafe, a bar, the studio… here?”
She seemed to be spiralling a bit and although it was cute, Matty felt the need to save her, “Love, it’s fine. Whatever makes you comfortable. You’ve met the guys, and they love you, so-” He put his brave face on, “So I’m sure Finn will love me too. Yeah?”
He was met with a rapid nod, one that should’ve quelled his fears but only seemed to heighten them instead.
“So we’re doing this then?”
Matty blinked and lifted his chin to find her watching him again, that soft smile of hers back in its rightful place, looking pleased with how it had all turned out.
“What, meeting your mate?” He questioned her, having figured that much had been obvious, but then she was rolling her eyes at him again. 
“No, I meant- me and you.”
Oh.
Oh, he was grinning properly now. Like a massive twat, yeah, but how could he not? When she sat there looking all lovely and asking him if they could be something. 
“Me and you sounds good.” Matty murmured around the strength of his smile, fingertips diving beneath the hem of her jeans to tap the jut of her ankle bone.
He would've been embarrassed about it but he reckoned his grin was mimicked on her face and was all the more glad for it. Because he’d seen her smile and he’d seen laugh, but this grin. It was something else.
It wasn’t a difficult decision, his next move. Because before Matty could even contemplate it, he was all but throwing himself up the other end of the settee to cradle her head between his arms and catch her mouth with his.
She kissed him back with almost as much excitement, the pair of them smiling and laughing giddily at the stupidity and utter prospect of it all.
“Got you trapped now.” Matty breathed into the space between them not long after, eyes boring into her own. He hadn't been lying earlier when he’d claimed that they were one of his favourite things about her.
She barked out a laugh, hands falling away from where they’d been holding his neck to cover her face. “Was that a mouse joke?” She asked him through the gaps in her fingers, shaking her head at him.
Matty hadn’t really thought too much about his words, but thinking back he couldn’t stop himself from laughing too, bowing his shoulders to chuckle into the crook of her neck. “Fuck, I guess so.”
Her arms wrapped themselves around him again and so he nipped at the edge of her jaw, grinning like a fucking idiot.
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goatcheesecak3 · 1 year ago
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Dean taylor x reader
I think this still counts as a fluff, but it's a tad bit more spicy than normal since it's pretty impossible to write fluff for dean. Also shouout to @coveredinsoot because he's the only other person who loves Dean as much as I do <33
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"We gonna head to bed?" Dean asked, putting an empty beer bottle in the bin
"I don't know, I don't really feel like it" you said, internally laughing, you knew this would piss Dean off slightly.
"I wasn't asking" he said, tapping the pistol he kept neatly tucked into his boxers.
"I'm not scared by that, Dean. I know you're not gonna hurt me." You said smugly
"What makes you so sure?" He turned to face you, his body looming over you in an attempt to seem menacing.
"If you were gonna do something like that you would've done it by now. If you change your mind this far along you'll just seem indecisive" you replied casually, you knew exactly how to push Dean's buttons. He wasn't exactly the type to be affectionate, but you knew how to coax it out of him. The most successful method was to stroke his ego.
"You're a smart guy," you continued, your voice low and sultry, "we both know you've kept me around this long for a reason"
Dean smirked to himself, before reaching out to grab your hand.
"Come to bed, baby"
There was that word, baby. Coming from any other guy you would have immediately called him corny and felt the urge to leave. But with Dean it felt different. You knew he only said it to get his way, it didn't really mean anything to him, but you didn't really care. Just the fact that he actually had to resort to cute pet names to have some sort of hold over you was enough. You knew he had to work harder with you than with anyone else, and that did it for you.
"If you insist," you said, standing up.
You wobbled slightly, you'd had a fair amount to drink and you hadn't really eaten much that day, so you were extra unstable, something which Dean immediately picked up on.
"Fuck sake y/n, you're all light headed again aren't you?"
"Fuck is it to you?" You snapped.
"I hate it when you get like this. I can barely talk to you"
You made a face at him. Since when did he care about being able to talk to you?
"And that's a problem because???"
He refused to look you in the eye.
"Because I hate seeing my girlfriend/boyfriend  acting like a fucking zombie"
You smiled to yourself. You knew how much he hated admitting that you were his girlfriend/boyfriend, and how he would only do it if he was feeling particularly needy.
He noticed your complacent grin
"You're really pissing me off tonight, y/n"
"I know" you smiled biting your lower lip.
Dean couldn't help but let out a small chuckle. He hated to admit it, but he found it insanely attractive when you matched his energy. He hadn't really met anyone other than you who'd been able to put him in his place, and while he did find it irritating at times, it really did make him like you more.
He wrapped his arms around your waist, staring you directly in the eyes, your faces centimetres apart.
"Just come to bed, y/n" he whispered, his lips almost touching yours.
You leaned forward to kiss him, but he pulled away.
"Uh-uh, you get that when you do as you're told" he whispered, satisfied that he'd finally regained dominance.
A/n requests are still open! Sfw only, check my pinned post to see who I write about :^)
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noonaishere · 5 months ago
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Online/Offline [C.S] - sixty-five | an absolutely zero-cheeked up on a monday night, drinking to forget kind of a bitch
You were exhausted. Not just a regular amount of exhausted from working a full week, but fucking exhausted from being on edge the whole time. You finally understood how paleolithic animals must have felt as humans walked them into exhaustion; following them for miles at a gentle pace until they couldn’t walk anymore, dying easily at their hands afterward if they didn’t collapse before that.
You felt like your last few days of streaming were shit, too - between feeling so tired from working all day, and having someone hurl abuse at you - and decided to take the night off to recuperate. Seonghwa and San had brought back everyone’s presents - nice, high-proof wine from a place they toured for fun - and you vaguely debated drinking all of it in one shot…but you didn’t want to waste something so nice by drinking it while you were upset.
You took the bottles of soju you had out of your fridge instead and cracked the seal on one of them, pouring yourself a hefty glass.
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The doorbell rang and you, somewhat wobbly, got up and manhandled the button for the intercom screen. When you saw it was San, you opened the door.
“Hiiii… welcome to Casa de la SHIT.”
San’s eyebrows scrunched together in confusion.
“Come in, come in,” you gestured. “I never finished cleaning my fucking dishes because I was crying about the light on a cup, so we’re having a real normal one today.”
He walked past you and into the apartment, going over to the sink to check the dishes. You noticed the bag in his hand.
“What’s that?”
He plopped it onto the table, shaking the bottle and glass on it.
You shut the door. “Oh my god, cause an earthquake why don’t you?” 
He smiled at you as he took out the boxes. “Have you eaten?”
“Not since lunch… which would explain why I got drunk so fast.” 
“I brought you the best thing you could eat while drunk,” he opened one of the boxes, “fried chicken.”
You sat down. “Choi San, you’re a godsend.”
He smiled. He went to the sink and took a cup from the drying rack out of it and filled it with water, parking it in front of you. You looked up at him and he nodded towards the cup, telling you to drink it. As he went back to the sink and got to washing the rest of the dishes, you sighed and drank the water. 
“What’s the other bag?”
“Soju for me. How much did you drink so far?”
“Like…” you grabbed the bottle on the table and swirled the tiny bit that was in the bottom. 
He looked up from his washing. “A bottle?”
You got up and walked over to the recycling bin and pulled two empty bottles out by their necks and showed him, clinking them together in your hand. “Three.”
“Oh… okay.”
You dropped the bottles back into the bin and went to the fridge to find pull a new one out. “But I have more.” 
He looked at you and raised his eyebrows. “You should finish that water first.”
“Pfft. Okay, dad.”
He frowned. “Give me a chance to catch up.”
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Once he had finished washing the dishes, he could catch up with you, and catch up he did. Both of you had moved to the living room, leaning back against the couch as you sat on the floor.
“I just… I don’t…I don’t get it,” you said in between bites of chicken before putting it down. “Like, why me? And why is this happening?”
San watched you quietly as you ranted.
“And why aren’t women just issued a gun? Just-- a government issued gun.” You slammed your fist into your hand, punctuating your sentence, “Give. Women. A gun.”
He laughed softly.
“Give women a pink gun or-- you know-- it can be whatever color she wants. Give each woman a gun and men are not allowed to have guns and then maybe they’d fucking think twice if they knew they’d get shot in the face for harassing a woman.” You finished your thought and looked at the floor, but realized you had an amendment: “Trans women get two guns.”
He laughed again as you went back to your chicken. “I have to say, I think I agree.”
You nodded as you chewed. “Like, I didn’t do anything wrong, right? I just invited someone I knew to replace my normal streaming partner, and this guy is just freaking out in my chat.”
San nodded.
“Calling me a whore and a slut-- Quack sent me a screencap of the shit she’s been deleting… like… find a hobby you sick fuck!”
“Was it bad?”
“He was calling you a simp and a beta cuck and a loser and shit, and I was a whore and a slut and like, like, no good and a cheater-- cheater? Cheater? Everyone knows that Keeho and I aren’t dating! We have never dated and will never date! We’ve said it like a million times!”
San nodded.
“He even had his fucking company make a statement - twice - so people would leave me alone! Like, men and women can’t even be friends because some people think that the gender opposite from theirs is only there for… fucking… well, for fucking! And that’s it! Not like we’re all just people or anything and deserve respect inherently because we fucking…” you gestured wildly “...exist!”
San handed you a napkin and you wiped your mouth.
“I’m so… I’m just so tired. I’m so fucking tired.”
“There’s nothing you or Quack can do about it?”
“No, the dude is like, using a bot farm so it's multiple accounts with multiple IPs-- like, it’d almost somehow be better if he was another streamer and was targeting me, because then his channel could be banned for violating TOS! Like… I can’t believe I’m wishing it were worse so something could actually be done about it.”
“Yeah.”
“I thought that about the guy at work like that too and it’s like… how fucked is that, you know? Why does it have to be worse for it to be taken seriously?”
“We’re all taking you seriously.”
“Yeah, but I mean the cops. I mean the actual fucking… law. Who are supposed to something. They literally told Seonghwa that they can’t do anything because he hasn’t ‘done anything,’ but he’s showing up every time I’m there and trying to talk to me! And staring at me when he doesn’t try to talk to me! That’s something! If I told that to any woman they’d be like, ‘Yeah, he’s definitely a stalker.’” You shrugged at him angrily as if to say ‘Everyone else knows this!’
San nodded.
“Why does he have to escalate or get violent for me to have a real case against him? The dude is showing up to my place of work and waiting around for me! If someone did that to one of the cops they’d just arrest them without question!”
San nodded again.
You sighed. “Oh! Seonghwa asked me about it and said that you randomized my schedule and started putting me on more with you.”
“Oh-- yeah. I thought he might hang around less if I were around.”
“He seems to leave sooner on days you’re there. So, thanks for that.”
“Hey, it’s no problem.”
“Seonghwa said he’d also work behind the counter too if I tell him the guy is there.”
He nodded.
“And I asked him to cover for me and he did.”
He nodded again.
“I’m sorry to like… become a fucking burden like this. I’m so sorry.”
You covered your face with your hands. You didn't’ want him to look at you while you felt like a Grade-A mess, but covering your face had an unintended effect that you knew was going to happen at some point: you started crying. 
“Woah, hey,” San moved towards you and pulled you into a hug. “You’re not a burden.”
“Yes I am. I just showed up and got this job and now this guy is hanging around the café because of me. And what if Seonghwa fires me--”
“No, no, no. He’s not going to fire you, it’s not your fault.”
“But it is. He’s there because of me.”
“Did you ask him to come in and bother you?”
“N-no.”
“Then how can it be your fault? It’s his fault for following someone around who doesn’t want to be followed.”
“I feel so fucking stupid.”
“What? Why are you stupid?”
“I don’t know, like, why do I have these guys coming after me? Online and in real life… I didn’t do anything. Why am I being punished?”
“I know…” 
He held you, rubbing your arm with his free hand to reassure you. It was nice, leaning against him, his shoulders were broad and his arms encompassed you easily, his chest was solid and nice to lean against. You couldn’t believe you were having such thoughts while he was holding you while you cried. You were so dumb, what the fuck was wrong with you? 
The unintended feelings of affection towards San coupled with your already fragile state just made you spiral harder. Your hands curled into fists and you shook as you unsuccessfully tried to stop crying. You hiccuped a sob. 
“Hey…” San said as he hugged you tighter. “You seemed to be calming down, what happened?”
You could barely breathe from hyperventilating. “I’m-- I’m-- I’m sorry I’m just a-- a-- bunch of bro--broken pieces for you to pick up.”
“You’re not pieces.”
“I feel like I’m pieces.” You hiccuped again. 
“You’re not pieces--”
“I’m pieces.”
He leaned his cheek against your head for a few moments while he thought. “You’re a person having a hard time. And even if you were pieces, I don’t mind picking you up and holding you together until you reattach on your own.”
“You wouldn’t reattach me?”
He shook his head. “Because I can’t. Only you can decide to do that. But I can sit here and hold you together until you do.”
“I-- I still feel stupid.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m crying about something I can’t fix.”
“Well… what else are you supposed to do?”
“I don’t know.”
He chuckled softly. “No, I mean: if you can’t do anything else then all you can do is cry, right?”
“I guess.” You sniffed hard and he handed you a napkin from the bag with the boxes of chicken. You blew your nose. “When was the last time you cried?”
“You mean aside from sad things in movies?”
“You cry at movies?”
“Mmm… not always. But sad movies are sad for a reason, aren’t they? I wouldn’t be doing something wrong if I cried at one.” He chuckled. 
You laughed a little. “Yeah.”
“Hmm… I think it was the last time I saw my little siblings. A few years ago.”
“What happened?”
“I... I had to leave. I cried because I knew I’d probably never see them again.”
“Oh? Why?”
You tried to look up at him but he held you closer, so you couldn’t. You could feel him shake his head and then rest his chin on top of your head.
“I went through some stuff with my parents… I ended up leaving.”
“Oh… I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. It was nothing I could control. I was powerless.”
You nodded and let him hold you.
“But see? Sometimes when you can’t do anything else, all you can do is cry. At least it gets the emotions out.”
“I guess. I just wish I could do something that isn’t just crying about it.”
“I know.”
“Because even if it makes me feel better it’s still happening and I have to deal with it anyway… So then what happens? I just keep crying about it but still can’t do anything? Should I just live, stuck in a perpetual cycle of being bothered by people - unjustly - and then crying about it?”
“Hopefully we can think of something soon.”
“But what?”
“I don’t know yet.”
“... Will you let me know when you think of something?”
“Of course.”
You resigned yourself to staying in his arms a while longer, trying to calm yourself down as he held you. He was warm and it felt nice to lean against him.
“Mmm… I remember,” he said, “when I was younger, I used to think that if I cried, I'd collapse. And so I never wanted to cry because I felt so weak. It took me a long time to realize that crying doesn't make a person weak. Now that I have good friends, I know that there are people to hold on to when I feel that way. So now, I know that even if I cry, I won't break.”
He shifted so he could look at you and you nodded and buried your face further into his chest. “I just feel like my whole life is falling apart.”
“I can see why you feel that way, it definitely looks like that if you look too close, but… you still have a roof over your head. You’re still streaming, and you have friends there; you have the café, and your coworkers are there… you have me. I know that both of your jobs are tarnished right now by what’s happening, but we’ll figure it out. They’ll go back to being how they were before.”
You nodded. You knew that he was probably right, even though it didn't feel that way yet. You let him continue to hold you, his presence a source of strength, his embrace a source of renewing energy. And, while you didn’t feel particularly strong or renewed yet, you did feel a tiny bit better in having him around. You had missed him while he was gone for the week, and not just because his presence helped deter the stalker.
Your mind had wandered so far that you almost didn’t notice your phone lighting up on the table. You sat up and looked at it. 
“Fuck.” 
“What?” 
“My dad is calling me.”
“I thought you liked your parents?”
“I do, but I haven’t told them what was happening because I didn’t want them to worry.”
The call went to voicemail.
“Why didn’t you pick up? You didn’t have to tell him about it.”
“I know, I just… I don’t know if I can talk at all right now.”
San watched you silently.
“But… I want to talk to them. I miss them.” He didn’t say anything.
“I… if I call them back, could you… could you hold my hand, maybe?”
“Of course. Whatever you need.”
You nodded. You used a napkin and blew your nose, inhaling deeply to see how well you could breathe; you didn’t want to sound like you had just been crying. You sat back next to San and readied yourself with another deep breath. You hit the Dial button and waited for your dad to pick up. San held out his hand to you and you put yours in his. He gripped yours gently but firmly, giving you a reassuring squeeze.
“Hey, kiddo!” Your dad answered happily.
“Hi dad.” Your voice shook a little.
San squeezed your hand reassuringly, smiling at you. You smiled back. 
“How are you and mom?”
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The call with your parents ended, you and San were still sitting on the floor, the soju and chicken nearly finished. You had managed to avoid telling them about what was happening in either area of your life, and promised them that they could visit the café at some point in the future to meet your coworkers. Of course, you didn’t tell them the reason why they couldn’t visit now.
Sitting in silence like you had been since you hung up with them a few minutes ago, you were still feeling contemplative.
“Do you ever think about love?”
“Love?”
You nodded.
“Umm… sometimes. I haven’t in a while though.”
“Really? Why not?”
San shrugged. “I’ve mostly been… working at the café, gaming, that kind of stuff.”
You nodded again.
“Why?”
“All this… stalking stuff. It’s been sort of bringing up bad memories of an ex of mine.”
He watched you silently as you thought to yourself. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”
“And if I do? Will you listen?”
“Of course I will.”
You nodded. “I think it just… I guess something about it just made my brain ping it as seeming like his abuse. Like… when you first meet someone and they don’t say something explicitly racist, but it’s like… tangential to a racist comment? And your brain kind of pings it as like, ‘Watch out for that,’ you know?”
Though his face was soft with compassion, his brows furrowed. “Was it… physical? The abuse.”
“It was more mental and emotional… though he did throw things when he was mad. He never hit me, but friends I knew who had been in physically abusive relationships said it was only a matter of time.”
San nodded. “I don’t know what to say.”
“He punched a wall once.”
He opened his mouth to respond.
“He had backed me up against it. The hole was like, five inches from my head. His fist went through the drywall and somehow all he had was a bruise afterwards.”
You laughed nervously as you tried to fight back tears and he put his hand on yours.
“Do you… do you want me to find him and punch him in the face?” he asked.
You laughed. Earnestly this time.
He smiled at your reaction. “I could put him through a wall if you want.”
You shook your head. “No, I think enough walls have suffered because of him.”
He smiled softly at you, his hand not leaving yours, and his thumb stroking your skin.
“You know how Yeji always asks ‘internet questions’? Whatever everyone’s debating over at the time?”
“Like, ‘is a butt one or two’?”
You rolled your eyes. “Yeah.”
“Mhm.”
“While you were away for the week she found one that was like ‘is it better to be someone’s first or last love’? And we were all talking about it.”
“Ahh.”
“And with the stalker stuff reminding me of my ex… I guess I wish I could delete my first love. Or maybe get a do-over.”
He nodded. “I can see why, if that’s how he acted.”
“Yeah… I feel so dumb because, like, I really did love him. So much. And yet… all of that love couldn’t save me from how he treated me.”
“I’m sorry.”
“...Yeah.”
The two of you slipped into a comfortable silence as you both thought.
“Which would you want to be?” You asked.
“Which-- oh, first or last?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh, um… Well, I haven’t really had a first love yet.”
“Really? You?”
He laughed bashfully. “My parents kind of… wanted me to meet someone early on and it sort of put me off dating.”
“Oh.”
“I’ve dated a little since then… but I think in general it’s just not something I really enjoy. The whole ‘dating game’… where you’re supposed to dress a certain way and act a certain way and it just reminds me of them and how they went about things.”
“Oh. I’m sorry.”
He shook his head. “They’re the ones who should be saying that.”
You nodded and switched the position of your hands, putting his in yours. He looked at your hands for a few moments as you curled your fingers around his and put your other hand on top of it.
“I don’t think I know which would be better, but… I think I might be a little greedy.” He smiled to himself. “I’d want to be someone’s first and last love if I could.”
You exhaled sharply through your nose as you stifled a laugh. “That is pretty greedy.”
“Yeah… I guess I can’t escape the way my parents raised me.”
Your brows came together in the middle of your forehead as you tried to understand his meaning. As you opened your mouth to ask, he slipped his hand out of yours and stood.
“We should probably clean this mess up.”
“Oh--” you looked around at the empty bottles, the food containers, the crumpled, dirty napkins, and all the other garbage you two had strewn around as you drank and ate. You stood and helped him.
As the last bottle was put in the recycling bin, he put his jacket on and you saw him off at the door, you plucked up the courage to ask something.
“Um, San?”
“Yes?” He asked as he adjusted the collar of his jacket, frowning for a moment as he tried to figure out how it had flipped under, unable to see it.
“Um… Thank you for coming over to take care of me. It was…” you nodded. “Thank you.”
He finally fixed the collar and smiled. “Hey, anytime.”
“Um…” You lunged forward and threw your arms around his middle, hugging him tightly.
Surprised, he caught you, stumbling for a second before recovering with a laugh. “What’s this for?”
“I just wanted to thank you again. I’m sorry you haven’t found a first love yet.”
“Oh…” He reassured you with a pat to your head. “You don’t have to worry about that. It’s bound to happen.”
“I hope it does.”
As you pulled back to look at him you realized how odd it must seem that you hugged him so suddenly.
You pulled away completely. “Um, so yeah, thank you for making me feel better.”
He nodded. “It’s not a problem.”
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l0velylecter · 2 years ago
Text
headcanons of simon ‘ghost’ riley after a divorce
— simon ‘ghost’ riley after a divorce  rating : g for general audience, sfw! pairing : f!reader / simon ‘ghost’ riley tags : angst, pure angst fandom : cod mwii warnings : cursing, potential anxiety inducing descriptions 
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01| Simon doesn’t dream often, but when he does, he’ll wake up with the feeling of snow against his eyelids and the weight of your lips against his. He would brush the hair out of your face and hold you in place, knowing that in a few seconds, he’ll open his eyes to the ceiling — hating how he still chooses to sleep only on one side of the bed.
02 | Simon stared at the plate before him, sparing a moment to pick all the strawberries out before eating the rest of the cake. Soap was still laughing at Gaz about how he has cream on his chin when Simon walked past him to scrape the fruit into the trashcan. He ignored their comments about being wasteful — he would have eaten it if the sweet smell didn’t make his stomach turn. And he hates himself for not being able to eat fucking strawberries because of a promise.
—save them for me ! what good are strawberries if they’re not for your wife, hm ?
03 | Simon still listens to all your voicemails, even if he never picks up. He blamed it on habit. After every mission, he’d find somewhere secluded, double checking if he was being followed before pressing the small button across the phone. And even now, he finds himself under the heavy rain, ignoring the wind so he can get some privacy.
— hi simon, i hope the mission went well.... i know you said this line was for emergencies only but i miss you. that’s an emergency, right? [ nervous laughter] i love you !
— hi simon, don’t be angry, but i just want to remind you to take care of yourself. love you ! 
— hi simon, is it strange that i’m making your favorite for dinner tonight even when you’re not here? i miss and love you.
He lifts the phone with one hand, and beneath the ledge, the waves crashed mercilessly around him, bursting against the jagged rocks scattered along the coastline. The expanse of unwelcoming grey stretched far in front and far behind, nearly endless under the lonely light of the moon. He hesitates mid-throw, fingers stubbornly clinging onto the device against his will. Simon’s memorised every single one of them, so to hear a new, recent voicemail play through the speakers took him by surprise.
— hi simon... i know we’re... divorced now. and i shouldn’t be calling this number, but i don’t think you’ll be listening to it anyway. i just want to say...i still wish you were here. i still miss you. and i still want you to take care of yourself. i’m sorry, i’ll hang up now. i....
Keeping the phone was stupid, dangerous, reckless even. Simon hit save before plucking the chip card out, crushing it under his boot while pocketing the device. It was still you. 
(When Simon showed up at her door to borrow a hairdryer, Kate didn't question him. She simply placed it in his right hand, eying the drenched phone in his left.)
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a/n : i don’t know what this is , it’s a thirty minute blurb because i was just on my laptop listening to sleeping at last and this came up because i’m sad and needed some angst :”) 
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