#and when i want to do anythjng else

[lymooniee]

Genuinely how does one balance school and their other fun hobbies like ughhhhcjf :((

[howlingday]

Blake: Hey, Nora? I'm sorry about what happened to you.

Nora: What? What are you talking about? You don't have to apologize to me for anythjng... Unless you were the one who swapped my syrup for the sugar-free stuff...

Blake: No, no, I just wanted to say I'm sorry you had to go through what you did growing up because... Well, I heard about it and then I thought about how I grew up and I realized I didn't have it as bad as others.

Nora: Well, yeah, you were an island princess!

Blake: I wasn't- (Sigh) No, I was. Or I might as well have been. My family lived in the biggest house and we were responsible for everyone on the island. People had enough room to walk, let alone enough to eat or sleep.

Nora: Yeah, but you can't compare yourself to everybody. You're already pretty great.

Blake: No, I'm not! All I have ever done was brought misery to others!

Nora: Really? Since when?

Blake: Sin- Since I was in the White Fang! When I joined, I thought we were doing something to help my people, but all I was doing what hurting everyone else!

Nora: Hm... That is pretty bad...

Blake: I know...

Nora: ...but then you left. So it's all good!

Blake: Huh?!

Nora: You saw that the White Fang were bad and then you left. So I'd say it's all good.

Blake: But... I was a violent terrorist.

Nora: And now you're a huntress. So I'd say it's all good.

Blake: ...Thanks, Nora.

Nora: Anytime! Now, about that sugar-free syrup...

[mechacringekitty]

oh god i just realised idk when im going to get vaxxed and if its anywhere earlier than two weeks from now im soso fucked

my arms are covered in cuts that cant be passed off as anythjng else snd my mom has threatened to ssnd me to like professionals if she finds me cutting again

shit

i can probably fake not wanting to do it for a bit

j feel sick

[fairyhaos]

-🌱

hiya!!! so basically jihan + hoshi because youre very adorable and cute but when it gets down to it you have no issue defending your self and standing up for others as well (ofc idk you personally this is just based off of your tumblr acc and just my uh perspective(?) i guess you could say) and as far as i remember hannie and hoshi were said to be the two scariest members when they got angry so idk just the vibes i feel and also shua cuz hes just so :(( and really adorable. i feel a few of his personality traits are present in yours but theyre like such a huge part of you that its kinda hard to pick them out individually and point them out so- i hope you can understand smth from my ramblings 😭😭 (also im really not trying to uh (idk the right word perceive(?) act like i know you (?) ) idk but basically i just wanted to say that im not trying to assume (thats the word!!) anything its just the vibes you give off!! also youre doing great!! ily and appreciate you sm!! remember your health both physical, mental and emotional are far more important than anythjng else!!!

(also yes dw i do run a writing blog!!)

(you were like one of the first people i found when i joined tumblr so im really proud of you!!)

thank you for inspiring me so many times!! i owe you!! and also thank you for making my days a little bit brighter thanks to your creations that you decided to share with the world. <<33!!!!

🌱(is it just me or does this emoji remind you of hansol?)

STOP SPROUT ANON THAT'S S9 SWEET OF U :((( im glad i give soft excitable vibes + scary vibes at the same time bc that is literally what i aspire to be like ☝also idk if im really actually all that much like shua bc that man is just wayyyy more wonderful n perfect than ill ever be but it makes me vv happy when people say they see him in me 🥹🥹

and dwdw i get ur ramblings and literally i love seeing how other people perceive me!! im someone who's (unfortunately) very influenced by other people's opinions on me jshfhd so it makes me so interested to know how other people think ab me ^^

also aww omg you're so sweet :(( im honoured to be an inspiration for u hehe and i hope your week is going well too <3

[rylekayner]

pls tell me more abt jets punk au 👂👁️👁️👂

Wooo yes let’s go.

Ok so i’ve got a bunch of vague unconnected thoughts hence why I’ve been making my little drawing series instead of an actual fic so this is going to be very disjointed. I don’t know how long this may end up being so I’ll put it all bellow the cut :))

Mark and Connor meet at work, Mark is a tattoo apprentice and Connor is a piercer. Initially there’s a lot of tension between them, they’re opposite sides of the same coin.

Connor is an agitator and Mark’s uptight.

Half of Mark’s personality is that he’s completely straight edge and Connor used to sell drugs in high school.

Connor is a crowd killer, Mark is Mr pit etiquette.

It comes to a head when they both end up at a house show, Connor elbows Mark right in the face (genuinely by accident but to this day Mark doesn’t full believe him) and Adam drags them out side and tells them they need to get their shit together and either fuck or fight but just get it over with. Given Connor’s reputation Mark assumes he’s about to have to start throwing punches when he’s grabbed by his collar until he realised he’s being pulled in for a kiss.

They end up actually talking things out a realise they actually do a good job of rounding out each others harsher edges. Connor aggressiveness, and Marks elitist tendencies.

They still fight even 4 years into their relationship but they understand each other now much better than pretty much anyone else.

-

The band starts with Mark on guitar and vocals, Connor on drums with back up vocals and Troubs on bass. They end up adding Josh as lead guitar after his old band breaks up (not sure of the details with this one but I want Draisaitl in there somewhere cause I like the history between Jmo and Drai).

Troubs ends up leaving the band when he gets a “real job” in New York but he introduces the rest of the guys of Kyle as their new bassist.

Kyle would never admit it but he was terrified of Helle for the first couple of months, Connor has been in Winnipeg for years at this point but his reputation from the Michigan scene still haunts him and Kyle and heard stories. It’s almost hard to reconcile this version of Connor as the same one who’d allegedly set someone backyard on fire back in Michigan.

They end up bonding over making fun of Mark and Connor’s happy to have someone to smoke with again. Mark is still straight edge just less pretentious about it and Josh will do edibles but doesn’t like smoking so it’s been a while since Connor’s hand someone who will physically smoke with him. Once Kyle gets over his fear he has a little bit of hero worship going on which makes it very easy for Connor to convince him to get up to mischief.

This is going to end with mark/Connor/Kyle if I can help it.

-

Josh is a musical prodigy, he was in a metal band previously and has a crazy amount of skill with a guitar, mark thought he was being replaced when Troubs suggested recruiting him until Josh opened his mouth and they heard his excuse for singing (even for a punk band it was shocking) but he’s got a natural inclination to music in a way none of the other quite do. Together with Connor they write a majority of the bands songs.

He had a messy break up with Drai which caused his last band to fall apart and after that he mostly just focused on music and collage (he’s getting a masters in anthropology, they all thought it was a joke when he told them) but then there’s this new bouncer at Adams bar (Adam owns a dive bar sorry this is all very disjointed) and Josh is enamoured. Spoiler alert it’s Morgan who is not at all involved in the punk scene, he’s just new to Winnipeg and needed a job and now he’s at all of the gigs the play at Adam’s and Josh won’t talk to him because “he barely looks old enough to be in here”

Uhhh I think that’s it for the moment I’m on a lot of pain meds but if you wanna know anythjng in particular please ask I’m so excited to talk about this au the more I talk about it the easier it is for me when I eventually do write it

TL;DR

Mark: Straight Edge, Sings and Plays guitar, in a long term relationship with Helle

Connor: Shit stirer, plays drums, sometimes sings, writes a lot of the songs, in a long term relationship with Mark

Kyle: Newest member of the band, plays bass primarily but can play several other instruments, has something suspiciously flirty going on with Helle and Scheif

Josh: the most traditionally talented, plays guitar, is not allowed to sing under any circumstances, helps Helle with writing, had a nasty break up with Drai a few years back is now busy making heart eyes a Bear.

Morgan: Not really involved in the scene, just works as a bouncer for a lot of the gigs the boys play. Spends a lot of time day dreaming about Josh serenading him (only because he’s never hear josh sing)

[sleepyjim2]

7 + 17? ::3

thank u for the ask!! :3c

7. what do you love about the disabled community?

tbh i love the feeling of just Having a community , ppl who are like me and care about me :] i love art created by other disabled folks and i like bonding over shared experiences :3 ive never met anyone else who has my condition specifically (cloves syndrome+kts) but ive met people who kinda get what its like n that makes me glad

17. what tips have you picked up for low spoon days?

gonna be real and honest ,Not many 😭 hmm . u can do anythjng u want to sitting down if you want u can have a chair in the bathroom or at the kitchen sink if you need and thats fine and awesome actually . ive also learned to keep a decent selection of Low Effort(tm) but still relatively Healthytm) foods in the house when its too much to prepare snacks n meals, like having uncrustables n pre-cut/prepared fruits n stuff like that.

[kusundei]

its always initiative. “you have no initiative you dont do anything” like god fucking forbid i do the extent of what i can . NO BECAUSE EVEN THIS IS PISSING ME OFF BECAUSE IM MAD AT MYSELF? oh my god no i fuckjng cant thiiss is bothering me. maybe ahe is fucking right and i need to start stepping it up and doing more shit brcquse clearly im neger doijg fuckign enoigh anyway i cant iICANTICANTICAIGCNANT^_^ god forbid i stay in a positive when i am comfortable and can repeat the same thinf over an dovet bcuz i dont want to go out of my cpmfort zone . i cant. no in fucking aTWEAKING IM TWEAKING IMTWEAKING^_^ bcuz everyhtinf i want ti say to matbe appease her males me feel bad ajd hate myself like no i cant ask to go out with you because i cant buy you anythjng. i cant drive. its left me at a disadvantage and youre putting me in this awkward positiion too and then youll use it again me because god fucking forbid i cjt do anyhritn IMGOING TO FUCKING KILL MYSELF. IM GOING TO END MY LIFE I CANT FUCKING SO THIS SHIT. if she tales mt laptop and everythgint else tonight im being so genuine this will be my last and final fucking straw. bombing that math test and interview on purpose i cant fucking take this shigICANT I CANT DOO ANTHRINT I CANNTT BE OKAY^_^

i dont get it i dont fucking get it because what tge fuck. WHAT TH FUCK??? IS IT EVEN A FUCKIGN SURPRISE IF I TELL YOU AND oh my god imcufckitnybh he losing my mind im being lashed in class because im being fucking dramatic like god forbid im fucking g sorrryyy. like sorryy sorrySORRYYY??????????? ph my god i iicant i will not lash my friends iii loveee my friends ite just r we fuckign eeirosuclile i cqnt ??? ICNT???

losijg my fucking mind because i did have slmethjng planned but no you want me to do solething with jonathan like i dont fuckign TALK TO HIM? IS IT A SURPRISE IF I TELL YOU NOW? we have never NEVERRR been fucking able to do anyhtjng i always give you aomething every year we never go out ebcause hoe the fick r we honna go out youre going yo ejd up doijg it because i cant fucking drive??? i have no money we cant fo out oht to eat??????? and we r already doing somethjgn like r we fucking seirous and then u LASH ME THIS MORNING AND I WAS ALREADY FUCKING PISSED OFF AJD OHHH MY GOD IM TQEAKING IM LSOING MY FUCKING MIND? i cant no because i do feel cuckign dramatic now because they r telling me i am but god im sosoooFUCKING . i cant ^_^ i cant i cant i cant^_^ the world can only be so fucking kind to me and i clearly used it to its extent just now and yeaterday. ifs fucking ove ri need toKILL MYSELF OR SOMETHINT AICSNT FUCKING DOTHIS

[m0e-ru]

wakes up chews on hypothetical book i wrote of persona4 analyses like a pacifier and hope I got back to sleep

[if-mirrormine]

i feel like one of your favorite shows is Infinity Train, and im curious about your thoughts on the show (and if it impacted Mirror Mine in any way, but no worries if not lmao)

if you havent watched it, you should! it's a show where each season is about a new protagonist, wuth the throughline being this inter-dimensional train that you can only get on when youre at a big crossroads moment of Last Chance To Turn Back And Do The Right Thing and you dont turn back/do the right thing. S1 is pretty light with some moments of dark "It's for kids! (audience: wtf THIS is for KIDS???)" horror. S2 gets darker. S3 is HELLA dark. and S4 is similar in tone to S1 (and then it got cancelled and i cry every time i remember). every season fucks with the rules of the train where you understand the ground-work of how this all works and then, eveey season, they subvert the rules in a new way. mainly the thing that makes me think of you/Mirror Mine is the fact that, once you get on the train, time passes normally. if you are on the train for six months, you are missing irl for six months. if you have been on the train since you were 12 and and are now 18 years old, youve been missing for 6 years irl. if you never get off the train and you die there, your body was never found irl and you are still missing to this day. and so on, and so forth. i dont want to spoil any other rules than that, because that's the most subtle one (since most of our time is on the train, not seeing the fall-out of you getting off of it), so i dont spoil anything else for anybody who hasn't seen it. plus theres some good old fashion Gravity Falls/Secret of Nimh/Return To Oz level horror dispersed throughout this animated sci-fi cartoon, which sounds like your speed if the Face Melting thing is anythjng to go on lmao

i've never actually heard of this show but if i don't watch it immediately, i'm gonna die

[purplefrogg]

happy birthday tommy

summary: just birthday traditions with tommy tubbo and ranboo

a/n: first fic enjoy‼️

tommy was finally 17. all day he had been going around, telling everyone it was his birthday, and how he was an even bigger man now.

most of them just laughed along with him, wishing him a happy birthday. punz and sapnap challenged him, saying if he was really a big man, he should fight them in a 1v1. jokingly of course, tommy agreed before calling them both bitches and walking away.

his next stop was snowchester, where his best friends tubbo and ranboo lived. they both knew it was his birthday of course, but he still wanted to go visit. just to make sure they remembered.

they did. they also remembered the tradition of “birthday tickles” tommy had started when they were kids, and never remembered come time of his birthday. they thought it was funny, it was like a little surprise gift he got every single year. tommy was extremely ticklish, but very few people knew about it. at least that’s what he liked to think. truth was most people knew, as it was pretty obvious. he always flinched at the slightest of touch, even if it was nowhere near any of his weak spots.

after following the path tubbo had created, tommy walked up to tubbos house, practically kicking the door in.

“GUYYYYS THE BIG MAN HAS ARRIVED,” he shouted, scaring both ranboo and tubbo, who weren’t ready for him to burst in the way he just had.

“hey big man! happy birthday!” tubbo said, walking over and hugging his friend. tommy looked down at the smaller boy.

“happy birthday tommy,” ranboo said, his usual monotone voice, sounding a bit more joyful than usual.

“thanks guys! i am a big man now did you know? i’m 17 which means i can get married and have a wife now,” tommy said, prompting a small laugh from the two.

“let’s go do something! everyone else here is boring, they all told me to go away after a while but i know you guys are ma friendsss. you guys will hang out with me right?”

they both looked at each other knowingly, before looking back at tommy and nodding. tommy smiled and walked out of their house, starting to walk away. he did this a lot, just left without saying anything, expecting them to follow him and know where he wanted to go. tubbo and ranboo both followed, walking behind tommy and following him around.

he didn’t actually go anywhere, he just walked around snowchester, messing with different things and exploring the mansion.

they spent the rest of the day walking around, tommy talking to everyone, tubbo and ranboo following not far behind.

when tommy had enough, they ended up going back to tubbos house to hang out just the three of them. they didn’t get to many chill days, considering the other people around them. luckily since dream had been put in prison it had been easier, but still difficult since they all had other things they were working on.

they had visited michael, and were now downstairs in the main part of the house, talking to each other about random things.

“so tommy, how was your birthday?” tubbo asked. before tommy could answer, ranboo butted in.

“well the days not over yet,” ranboo said, looking in between the other two. tubbo nodded his head.

“ohhh yeahhhh.”

“what?” tommy asked, a confused look plastered on the boys face.

“did you seriously forget? again?” tubbo asked.

“you’re worse than me!” ranboo laughed. a look of realization, made its way to tommys face, and he started to slowly move away from the two of them, trying to negotiate his way out of this.

“guhuys come on. arent wehe a little old to continue this silly little tradition?”

“we weren’t too old on my birthday,” tubbo said back, walking towards tommy. ranboo did the same, trailing only a few inches behind tubbo.

“or mine.”

“yeheah but that’s different!” tommy said. he would never admit it to them, but he secretly enjoyed when they did this.

“no it’s really not, ranboo can you grab him before he runs.”

and with that ranboo grabbed tommy by the arms, holding them above his head as he continued to giggle.

“guhuys plehease.”

tubbo poked at his side, soliciting a small shriek from the blonde boy. tommy tried to get away, twisting and squirming in any direction he could, but he was trapped.

“hmmm, ranboo where should i go first?” tubbo spoke, a playful tone taking over his normal, calm one.

“i don’t know, maybe here,” ranboo said, poking at tommys underarms. tommy tried to pull his arms down, but ranboos grip was too strong.

“nohoho tubbo, guhuys really i mean do we need to doho thHIS-“ tommy was cut off by tubbo starting to wiggle his fingers in his underarms. tommys giggles became louder, and he started to squirm a lot more.

“fuhuck yohou!”

“that’s not very nice!” tubbo said, changing his pace, now drilling his fingers into the boys underarms, and moving them up and down to just above his rib cage.

“TUHUBOHO” tommy yelled, his giggles turning into laughter as tubbo continued this for a few minutes. tommy ended up sliding down to the floor, unable to stand any longer. this made things easier for tubbo and ranboo though.

“ranboo would you like a turn?” tubbo said, as he slowed down, now just lightly running his fingers along tommys sides. tommy fell back into soft giggles again at the change in pace.

“sure,” ranboo said, switching places with tubbo, who was now holding tommys arms above his head.

ranboo started right where tubbo left off, slowly running his finger up and down tommys sides.

“rahanboo plehease,” tommy whined. ranboo chuckled to himself before speaking.

“you see tommy normally i would listen to you, but you haven’t told us to stop once! you must be really having fun right now,” ranboo teased.

“shut the fuhuck uhup. noho im nohot,” tommy replied. of course he was, but once again he’d never admit that outloud.

“mhm, sure, then why haven’t you told us to stop?” tommy tried to think of an answer but before he could he was cut off again. “exactly.”

before anythjng else could be done, ranboo began squeezing at tommys sides and tubbo starting to wiggle his fingers at tommys underarms again.

tommy immediately broke out into a fit of laughter.

“GUHAHUYS PLEHEHEASE! I HAHATE YOHOU!” tommy shouted. tubbo and ranboo started to laugh along, amused at the boys reactions. every year they did this, and every year tommys reactions just got better.

ranboo switched from squeezing at his sides, to scratching at his belly, which provoked an even bigger reaction.

tommy was now thrashing around on the floor, “trying” to escape the feeling. his laughter had gone horse, and he was still trying to get his arms down.

sensing that he had nearly reached his limit, tubbo and ranboo slowed down. tubbo just tracing shapes along the boys collar bones, and ranboo starting to run his fingers up and down his sides again.

tommy calmed down, his laughter calming back down to giggles. eventually the two stopped, allowing tommy to fully catch his breath. they watched as he rolled over onto his side, curling up a bit looking at the two of them.

“you guys are dicks,” he said, once he had finally caught his breath.

“you love us,” tubbo said, smiling and poking tommys leg. tommy shot him a funny look, before looking at ranboo.

“this guy,” he said pointing at tubbo, prompting a small laugh from ranboo.

for the rest of the night until they eventually fell asleep, the three of them spent their time talking and laughing, having fun like the kids they really were.

[musicmaam]

Julian Knight had a bad case of restless leg syndrome. Whatever he did to try and calm himself down was ineffective against his wily left leg that seemed to monotonously and furiously bounce up and down and up and down.

It was a dilemma to say the least. What caused his dilemma, pertaining to his leg with a mind of its own, was yet another dilemma.

The school councelor, Mrs. Fischer, took another glance at the monitor of her computer, squinting at his transcript and most recent progress report.

“You understand we have a ‘no pass; no play’ system that we follow strictly at this school, Mr. Knight? Don’t you?”

“Yes ma’am,” his mother cursed leg wouldn’t stop. His heart was racing.

“And you do understand that it may be a good idea to adjust your schedule to more appropriately accommodate your busy life style and extracurriculars.”

“Yes ma’am,” he mumbled again, “I do understand.”

“Which is why I am proposing three options. One you most likely won’t like and two that you probably will.”

Her pointed nose turned up at him as she looked down through her bifocals to make eye contact. She started, “The first option: Quit one of your core sports you are participating in at this school or outside of school completely or take an extended hiatus.”

He instantly responded gently, “No.”

“That’s what I thought. Or you could move to an academic level history class or an academic level pre-cal clas—”

“NO!” He interjected, quickly regathering himself and restating, “No, I don’t think that’s an option.”

She looked aghast, “And why not?”

“Because—” he had to come up with an excuse, “Because—” not the real answer, “Uhm,” anythjng bur the real answer, “Well,” fuck it, “You see,” he just had to say the true reason, “The girl I want to marry is in my pre-cal class and if I’m not in class with her then I’ll have no reason to see her any time else and won’t be able to be with her because she has a boyfriend but she tutors me and I’m doing better because of it and just no. I can’t be switched out of that class.”

They were both silent for a moment. He twiddled his thumbs.

“So, you want to stay in your advanced Pre-calculus class so you can . . . have a girl in your class fall in love with you, am I correct?”

“Yes. Yes ma’am, you are correct,” he shifted in his chair awkwardly.

“Who is this girl?”

“Her name?”

Mrs. Fischer nodded, a curious glint in her eye.

“Genevieve Whitethorn.”

She smirked then, a sight Julian had never seen before, and then turned back to her computer, “Maybe we should take a look an on level history class then. Does that sound good?” She winked at him.

He smiled, “That sounds great,” His leg stopped shaking when he responded. He could stay with her.

I can’t tell if this is bad or not but OH WELL just @highqueenofelfhame and my children living their lives

[jisungism]

parents.

why??? do??? some??? parents??? act like it’s such a chore to be a parent??? like??? uhhh it’s not my fault rlly that i was born??? and the fact?? that you??? make it seem like you didn’t choose this?? which you didn’t we get it i was a unplanned kiddo but whatever

it like when parents always say oh i do the ironing for you oh i cook and blah blah blah it just makes it seem like they are trying to justify their horrible actions towards some children just because their a parent???

one of the main rules i was taught in an orthodox russian family is that the girl is always inferior to others, she has to clean and look after everything and whenever anythjng goes wrong the girl is always the scapegoat and don’t get me wrong!!! i’m used to cleaning and cooking all the time and i actually think that those sort of experiences give me good life lessons and i’m actually grateful i was raised in this way!! because now i can do any chore and not care much about it!!! but as soon as the parent starts acting like all the child can do is chores and nothing else?? is just so wrong

the fact that you’re the parent doesn’t mean that you can’t treat you’re child with the same respect that you expect them to treat you?? if you’re a parent, you have automatically signed up to that life long job, there’s no cheating it and making the child feel either neglected, used and other things because that is always the parents choice and NOT the child’s!!! the child can do nothing in this situation, because in some cases (i’m talking about strict parents here) if they try to stand up for themselves, they get pushed right back to the ground with the classic phrase “i’m the parent, you’re the child and i don’t care”

pushing children to the ground like that and STILL expecting them to treat you with respect is exactly what bad parenting is like. respect always goes both ways.

i guess what i really came here to say is that i’m scared. not for myself, but im scared of my future self. what if all these years of mistreatment and russian family values like that has subconsciously engrained itself into my brain, and i start treating my children like shit because i finally get to be in a position of power? i know that’s what causes my mom to become this way and that’s what scares me, she was bossed around and tossed around and no one cared, so as soon as she became the boss she could finally do the same because it felt good, to become in a position where you can be the one in control. i don’t blame her at all, in fact i would have probably done the same thing and that is exactly what i’m scared off. because i just know that i will become like her because of this viscous circle, and that my kids will become like me.

if anyone has any advice on how i can become a good example to my future children don’t worry i’m not pregnant im just thinking ahead, because i don’t want to be stuck in the already too familiar story of having an unplanned kid and feel like your whole life is thrown away because of their birth.

shit like this just causes family issues and as much as i hate to sound like an idiot, shit things in life are good, the shitter some parts of your life are, the more you cherish the good bits. i’m grateful for my childhood, even though it’s been nothing but mistreatment and the occasional abuse. positivity is an amazing amazing thing. nothing can take away your faith for the future and hope. with that i end my mini rant and hope that if someone like me is reading this, i’m here to talk and help you if i can, heck, maybe we can help each other. my inbox is always open.

[yellowbelly-blackbones]

I'm just so tired and i'm always so tired ans when i get home from work i'm too tired to do anythjng and then i'm tired mentally and i don't know how to help myself or help others bc i want to be close and help others but i never want to talk about myself for even a second or else i'll vomit

I don't wish i was dead i wanna see myself get better at living

I feel i have nothing to offer past a superficial level

Who wants anything to do with me and why do i rarely notice that i'm so alone and why does that rarely bother me

I crave intamacy and am terrified of the vulnerability that that requires

[braysforimpvct]

Tonight I started wrapping all of my moms Rae Dunn stuff.

She asked why you weren’t helping me. I said you were in bed relaxing. I lied to cover for you and said if you were doing this for your mom I’d be in bed too ( cause it’s time consuming to wrap all that stuff)

And she said that was rude and that I should be helping you when you need it.

Hours later were in bed and you ask me if she told me you should be helping me. So I explained ^ with the above response.

You said, “ Does she go to work with Chris and help him?”

I said what?

You said, “ I was working today. Shooting at the river and shit, and then I came home and was in the bath for a while relaxing and then showered and came to bed”

You also said, “your mom wouldn’t even have any of this if it wasn’t for me driving you there. It’s not my job to help pack it.”

Okay? I literally do everything for you - even when I’m sore, and tired. Always. Because you are the laziest person I have ever met. And what’s worse is you just expect me to do things for you. You expect me to help you. You expect me to feed the dogs, let them out, get you drinks, snacks, your camera, charge your equipment, clean, bring you a towel whenever you shower, bring all the groceries in, clean out the fridge, take out the trash, do our laundry, make our bed, etc etc. The list literally goes on forever.

You worked for a whole hour and a half. Taking photos and video.

And you thought that was a valid excuse to exclaim my mom had no place INSINUATING that it was rude of you not to help me? You should have asked if I needed help. I said you were reading into it way deeper than you should be. You told me you were “going to sleep, so you didn’t continue *reading into it*” in a bitchy tone, and rolled over.

I asked why you were doing this? You told me to “go to sleep”

“WHY, are you doing this?! I haven’t done anythjng wrong?”

“You’re treating me like shit and I didn’t even do anything”

You: “Shut the fuck up!”

So I got up, left the room and told you you were on your own for the ATT guy tomorrow morning. Because it’s not my “job” and it’s not. Neither is anything else I do for you. But I do it because I care about you.

I keep going back and forth between being sad to leave here and internally screaming begging to be able to leave.

I really think at the end of the day - you and I just will never work. You have so many qualities I want in someone. So many things to love about you. But so much ego, so much selfishness and immaturity.

I went to the bathroom, slammed the door, cried, went pee and came back to bed. You’d shut the light off and we’re already asleep. So I turned the light back on. Laid in bed and wrote this.

Ugh. 7 days.