#and when i used to go w/o eating on weekends at his house it wasnt cause i was antisocial it was cause i didnt want to eat in front of her | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

piknim · 5 years ago

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throwback to when i wasnt eating and got kinda skinny and it was the only time people constantly talked about how beautiful and good i looked and ever since i started eating again no one has told me that since

#what matters is i started feeling better so :)#i keep almost wanting to go back #but i stop myself bc im better than that now :)#i mean i get like pitty comments that dont feel genuine but not actual comments #i told my dad what my stepmom did to me mentally bc of her constant diet shit #and he had no words #he said something but i cant remember what but he mostly just looked really mad/upset #bc i dont think he realized that whn i was only eating 1 meal a day of chips and salsa i was not doing it bc i loved salsa #and when i used to go w/o eating on weekends at his house it wasnt cause i was antisocial it was cause i didnt want to eat in front of her #i still absolutely hate great value mild salsa #it makes me want to puke #hot salsa is fine tho but i cant do it a lot #oh but #theres this photo of me back then on the fridge #and yeah i look kinda nice i guess!#but i look! so unnatural!#like everyone telling me i looked good and didnt question my habits are all assholes and dont actually care about my health :)#just whether im fat or not :)#well i would like to loose a little weight(HEALTHILY) id much rather be a little tubby than starving myself so :)))))

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