#and we're working backwards so when its done it goes in order

[libraryofzeglyth]

BEYONCE RENAISSANCE TOUR SETLIST (LA DAY 1)

[thatfanficstuff]

Impossible - Chapter 24

Pairing: Eric Northman x Reader + Godric

Warnings: description of death

A/N: Sorry for the delay. I had a flareup and haven't written in like three weeks. Everything I've been posting was pre-written. We're nearing the end.

***

Your visit to Sophie-Anne two days later was unannounced. Your father led the small group consisting of yourself, Eric and the Magister through the grounds, dismissing Sophie’s guards as he went. His own men trailed behind you silently taking their places to secure the property.

As usual, Sophie was found lounging in what she called her day room. Your father glanced around and arched a brow. Obviously he found it a bit much. You agreed completely.

“A bit ostentatious for one so deeply in debt. Wouldn’t you agree, Magister?” Roman asked, sounding bored.

“Absolutely, sir.”

Sophie, who up until this point, was ignoring all of you, was on her feet in a flash. Her gaze darted to you and Eric briefly before focusing on the other two men again. “Hailey, leave us,” she said to the blonde that had been lounging beside her. Hailey was Sookie’s cousin and didn’t know when to keep her mouth shut. It was how your friend had ended up on Sophie-Anne’s radar to begin with.

Once her lover had left, the queen put her attention back on your group. “Magister, I wasn’t expecting you. To what do I owe the pleasure?” Try as she might, the queen couldn’t keep that tremor of worry from her tone. That alone conveyed her youth. Frankly, you weren��t certain how she’d come to the position in the first place. Politics.

Alonso scoffed as he smirked. “I believe we can all agree it is rarely a pleasure when I become involved, your majesty.”

Her smile dropped before instantly finding its way back to her face. “And who is this with you?”

Now your father smirked as well. “Just call me an interested party.”

You rolled your eyes and elbowed Eric in the ribs when he huffed a surprised laugh at your father’s words. The noise caught Sophie-Anne’s attention and she glared at your mate. You fought the immediate urge to smack her. As if sensing your irritation, Eric grabbed your hand in his. If nothing else, his touch grounded you.

Her eyes flicked down to your joined hands and you would have sworn she turned just a bit paler. Sophie-Anne knew who you were and knew you used to work for the Authority. Now, here you were holding hands with the person that had knowledge that could bury her. She wasn’t a stupid woman, she knew where this was heading. That didn’t stop her from trying to talk her way out of trouble.

“I’m not quite sure what is going on here, Magister, but I assure you if any of my subjects have stepped out of line and fabricated some treasonous lie in an attempt to cast doubt on my loyalties, I am more than capable of punishing them without the Authority’s interference.”

“Not your subject and not a lie,” you piped up.

Alonso stepped forward, one hand in the pocket of his immaculate suit. “You have been accused of conspiring to sell the sacred blood for your personal gain. How do you plea?”

As Alonso took another step, Sophie stepped backward. “Not guilty of course. I would never do anything so heinous.”

Roman scowled. “Ordering your subjects to do it on your behalf doesn’t absolve you of your culpability.”

“What-what did she tell you?” Sophie stuttered as she took another step back. “It’s not true. Any of it.”

“How would you know if you aren’t aware of what has been said?” the Magister asked, a smirk curling his lips.

She held out a hand as if that would protect her from the judgement coming her way. “Now, just a minute.” Her eyes found you. “What is this? I trusted you. Why are you doing this? You don’t even work for them anymore.”

“Because it’s shit, Sophie. You’re trying to set him up to take the fall when this inevitably goes horribly wrong. If you were the leader you were supposed to be, you would have at least cut out the middle man. Taken some responsibility for your own actions. But that’s never been your strong suit, has it?” As much as you liked Sophie-Anne, she had some serious faults as a queen.

The Authority had been aware of her failings, but until this point, they’d been able to look the other way to keep from stirring things up where they didn’t have to. Despite all appearances to the contrary, the Authority was very into maintaining the status quo when possible.

Not getting the response she wanted from you, she looked at Eric. “And you? This is treason.”

“Speaking of concerns with my mate is not treasonous. It was she who reported you to the Authority. My apologies, my queen.” He sounded so sincere but he wore that familiar smirk as he lifted your hand to kiss the back of it. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes. Barely.

“Enough,” your father interrupted the conversation, clearly bored with the theatrics. “Magister?”

“Sophie-Anne Leclerq, you have been found guilty of the charge against you. The penalty is the true death.” He flicked his fingers and Eric stepped forward to carry out the sentence.

“Wait!” Sophie yelled.

Alonso held up his hand to bring your mate to a halt. “What is it?”

“I demand a rehearing. I want a hearing in front of the Authority.”

You arched a brow. You weren’t certain anyone had ever tried that before. But she was a queen, so if anyone was going to try it, it was fitting that it was her.

“You are aware that I am the voice of the Authority in matters such as this?” the Magister asked with a quick glance to your father. “However, given your status, the request is not unreasonable.”

Elation flickered across Sophie-Anne’s face. It lasted about two minutes before your father spoke.

“The Authority has heard your case and affirms the Magister’s decision. Sorry, Ms. Leclerq, but there are sins that even the worst of us can’t overlook.” He straightened the cuffs of his suit as he stared at the queen as if she was a bug beneath his shoe.

“Who are you?” Sophie asked.

“I am the Guardian,” he answered with an arched brow. He glanced at Eric and gestured to the queen. “Mr. Northman, if you would.”

Sophie-Anne shook her head and backed away but Eric was on her in a flash. She attempted to fight but he took her down easily, forcing her onto her stomach. He placed a foot on her back to hold her down while he grasped her head in his hands and yanked upward. A second later and Eric was dropping the late queen’s decapitated head on ground as she dissolved beneath him.

You’d stayed behind your father and Alonso so they were between you and the mess but you still stepped backward. Vampire deaths were so disgusting. “Well done, Mr. Northman. You’ll forgive me if I don’t offer you a ride back to your home,” your father said and you frowned. Yes, Eric could get himself home, but it still annoyed you. Of course, he hadn’t bothered to mention his plan for your mate to play executioner until you were almost there so you hadn’t brought anything for Eric to change into even if he cleaned himself up.

“Understandable, sir. I’ll meet you there.” He may have been talking to your father but he was looking at you. He was letting you know it wasn’t worth the fight. You ran your eyes over his blood-soaked form and gave him a nod. He’d make it home before the three of you anyway.

Roman took your arm in his hand and steered you to the exit. His steps were long and quick until he was practically dragging you behind him. You scowled and pulled against him but he didn’t slow down. Finally, you planted your feet and jerked your arm. He stumbled to a stop and turned to frown at you.

“Why the hell are you in such a hurry? Is there something I should know?” Your gaze shifted between him and Alonso. The latter looked amused as his lips twitched. Your father closed his eyes and sighed.

“I’m sorry. There’s just a phone call that I need to make as soon as possible. Why don’t you and Alonso take the car back? I’ll ride with some of the men.” He didn’t wait for a response before disappearing into the dark.

You licked your lips and shook your head before glaring at your friend. “And just what do you think is so funny?”

He chuckled and held up his hands in surrender. “I was wondering how long you were going to let him drag you along until you said something.”

“You have any idea what that call’s about?” you asked. Roman was up to something.

“Not a clue, sweetheart.”

[sanababes]

It All Ends Here

Pairings: female kpop idols x fem!reader

Warnings: NEUTRAL (detective au)

-----------

PROFILE

• Name: Park Y/n (female)

• Age: 18

• Height: 5'8

• Bloodtype: A-

===

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock

The sound of the clock almost lulled you to sleep. Exhaustion was finally taking a toll on your whole body due to the continuous murder cases for the past weeks. You and your teammates were sent to different crime scenes to assist the bureau, and especially to ensure the safety of the city of Seoul.

A sound of glass being placed on the table interrupted your eyelids from fully closing. You looked up to see your trusted partner, Major Song Yuqi. She chuckled at your vulnerable state then took a sit across you.

"It's pretty rare to see you that tired, Y/n." She mocked playfully.

You rolled your eyes out of annoyance and clearly, your day won't get any better.

"Yeah right,"

She gestured you to drink the liquid that she mainly prepared to ease your troubled mind. You casted a look of doubt to your mischievous friend before shrugging your shoulders and sipped on the hot tea. A delightful sigh came out from your mouth as the warm liquid rushed down on your throat.

"Damn, that's much better... Thanks, Yuqi." You smiled gently which made the latter feel contented.

"It's nothing, Lead Inspector."

"Oh! Today's finally the day we elect a new mayor! Who are you going to vote for?" She added while pacing around your room excitingly.

"Huh? I don't know yet..." You replied nonchalantly.

"Well I'm going for Kwon Boa, but don't tell chief though or he'd go spare!" You chuckled at your partner's antics.

Seoul is currently celebrating the election between the mayoral candidates – Choi Siwon (red party) and Kwon Boa (blue party). Both are socialites within the government, with Siwon being the current elected mayor and Boa's aspiring will to lead the city better.

Just then, the door of your office burst open. The two of you immediately rise up and greeted the Police Chief of Seoul, Kim Namjoon.

"There you are, Lead Inspector. I've been searching for you, "

"Speaking of the devil..." You heard Yuqi grumbling under her breath.

You stifled a laugh before welcoming the man inside.

"Well know that you found me, what is it that you want to say, Chief?" Your eyes glanced down to the i voted badge on his chest.

"I'm sure that you guys know that today is an important day! Keeping things secure is our top priority for now, that's why I came here. I want you to go check out the red party's offices because Mayor Siwon has expressed strong fears about the safety of his staffs and I don't want to leave anything to chance." He stated, but you're a little unsure with his sudden firm attitude.

"But chief I've been hoping that we'd be having a day off—"

Yuqi's whine was cut off when the chief yelled out.

"You can't seriously have hoped to be off duty on such a day, Major Song?! Now go and report to me as soon as your team is done patrolling!"

Eventually, you went to the lounge area of the officers with Yuqi tailing behind you and saw your other five teammates chilling without any worries.

"Guys! We'll be heading to the headquarters of the red party, please ready yourselves and we'll leave in a bit."

Sua, Jennie, Joy, Sana, and Miyeon groaned in unison as they struggled to follow your orders.

"Oh stop with the fuss, we are all tired here... Don't worry I'll try to book a week vacation for us." You offered.

Their faces instantly lit up at what you said, causing them to gear up hastily which made you snort.

《at Red party's Headquarters》

You and the girls stepped out from the van then walked up to the entrance of the building.

"Hey Y/n, have you noticed... how tense Chief is acting lately?" Jennie said as she clings to your right arm.

The others immediately agreed to what the older girl uttered.

"I know right, maybe the mayor is putting some kind of pressure on him. I hope it stops after the elections." Sana continued while swiftly wrapping her arm around you.

"We don't know anything about that yet, let's just wait and see."

You finally composed yourself, and as if it was planned, Mayor Siwon appeared with his bodyguards behind him.

"Inspector Y/n, I'm so glad that you girls are here!"

He shook hands with you and the girls looked at him with hidden disgust, unknown to your own oblivious demeanor.

"That goes the same for us, Mr. Choi." You smiled politely.

"Uhm since my headquarters are about to open in an hour or two, I want to make sure everything is safe for my staff's last day of work."

He motioned to come closer to the sealed doors before unlocking them one by one.

"Here, I've opened the doors for you. Please if you can just have a quick look inside, I'll feel safer." You and the girls reluctantly stepped inside the offices.

Your team began to part ways and started to look around the vast hall.

Not even a few seconds had passed, a loud shriek coming from Joy made you dash to her side.

"What's wro– oh shit!" Yuqi cursed as she saw what the latter was screaming about.

There in front of you and the other officers was a man sitting in one of the office chairs, unfortunately, he was shot to death.

"Oh my god! B-but how could this happen, and is that the rookie model, Kwon Jiyoung? What is h-he even doing here?" Joy stuttered due to the terrifying scene.

"I've never liked him at all since he's been involved with some drug scandal, but to die like that and be shot right between the eyes? Damn..." Sua sighed.

Just then, the mayor called out.

"Inspector, is everything alright?" His eyes went wide when he saw Jiyoung's dead body.

"Oh god, I-I swear I had nothing to do with this! I'm innocent and history will prove it!" He exclaimed while starting to walk backwards.

"Calm down, Mr. Choi. We're just going to need to talk to you since Jiyoung was shot in your headquarters, after all." You warned him with your raspy voice.

'Ughh, daddy~' The girls thought except for Yuqi.

( a/n: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

The mayor agreed and ushered you and your team to make it quick.

"Oh God, the press will surely crucify me once they knew about this. We need to do some damage control!"

After calming the man down, you added him to the profile list for being a possible suspect.

You told Jennie, Sana, and Joy to bring the victim's body to the morgue for an autopsy report. The rest are tasked to investigate the crime scene.

"Y/n! I found a receipt, this might be a clue." Miyeon said as you take a look on the faded paper.

It belonged to Jiyoung and it seems like he bought a drink at Lotte Hotel shortly before his death.

"Good job, maybe try checking the hotel after this search? You can bring Detective Jieun with you."

"Yes, Inspector!" She kissed your cheek before going back on finding clues or some fingerprints.

'Why are they so whipped for me...'

===

You and Yuqi are currently talking with the mayor in some private room within the Red party's offices. They are still some questions that Siwon needs to answer to give your team some information.

"Inspector, this cannot be happening! The journalists will have a field day with this if it goes out to the public!" He said and distress was evident on his face.

"I'm afraid that we cannot make this go all away, but I have already informed the Chief. I'm sure he'll keep this case confidential for a lotted time." Your partner reassured the man.

"I can't believe people would do this... Killing a man just to ruin my chances of being re-elected!"

Your brows furrowed at his statement.

"So you are claiming that you were framed?"

He reasoned that Kwon Jiyoung was an avid supporter of his campaign.

"I see, thank you for having time for us Mr. Mayor." You and Yuqi soon left the offices.

《back to Seoul Police Department》

The good news instantly came as the two of you arrived at the station. Coroner Kim Taeyeon reported that the victim was executed cleanly with an extremely precise shot. The killer seems to be right-handed due to the bullet trajectory and definitely knows how to handle a gun.

—————————————————

KILLER'S PROFILE

• handles guns

• right-handed

—————————————————

Meanwhile, Miyeon and Jieun just came back from investigating the lobby and bar of Lotte Hotel.

"Y/n, it's confirmed that Kwon Jiyoung came to the hotel shortly before his death. We also picked up a torn ticket, I'm sure it looks promising!" The detective said while handing you a clear zip bag which contains the clue.

"I see, let me try restore it in my office. I'll see you guys in a bit."

You sauntered towards your office and placed the torn pieces of the ticket on your table. You leaned one of your hands on the hard surface before starting to place the pieces together.

You're now down to the last part when someone back hugged you and nuzzled its face into the crook of your neck.

"Y/n~ let's cuddle~" Sana whined which made you chuckle.

"Now is not the time for that Sana-ssi, besides I just finished restoring the second clue." You showed her the finished product.

The girl snatched it from your hold before skimming through the details of the plane ticket. She also pushed you gently towards the table which made you sit on it, the latter smiled then placed herself on your lap.

"It says that this ticket was brought under Kwon Jiyoung's name. And this is a one-way ticket to Hawaii! Why he would even purchase such kind of trip?" Sana pouted as she turned her face towards you.

"You're right. As far as I know, Jiyoung's sole goal in life is to be a bona fide member of Seoul's exclusive luxury community. He'll never have left for some tropical islands..."

"The credit card number used to buy this ticket will help us understand everything! ...Oh no, it's badly printed... can you help decipher this for me Sana unnie?" You asked cutely.

"O-of course, I'll be done in no time!" You saw her blushing which made you smirk internally.

"Thanks, I really appreciate the help." You pressed a kiss on her forehead before leaving the latter flustered.

Your phone suddenly rang as you pressed answer, not even bothering to look at the name of the caller.

"Yah Park Y/n! We still need to have a chat with Kwon Boa, I'm barging in any second!" Yuqi exclaimed.

You groaned at her childish demeanor.

"I'll be back in an hour, please do your task okay?" You reminded Sana before finally meeting up with Yuqi.

===

《Seoul City Hall》

The press conference of the candidates just ended a few minutes ago, so you took it as an advantage and greeted the head of the blue party.

"Ah, Inspector Park! It's nice to see you, have you voted yet? After what happened today it seems like my victory tonight is almost ensured!" Boa expressed herself happily.

"Are you referring to Kwon Jiyoung's murder?" Yuqi asked as you watched the older woman in front.

"Hmm, I always had a hunch that the red party is populated with bloodthirsty maniacs. I mean making dreadful deeds just to advance their political agenda... Poor Mr. Kwon being shot at their own headquarters, now I'm sure that the citizens of Seoul will vote for me!"

"Anyways, my campaign has always been based on honesty and morals." The mayoral candidate stated.

You just sighed at her egocentric reply.

"I think that's all that we need to know for now, Mrs. Kwon. We'll keep in contact with you, just in case." You sent her a cold gaze before walking away with your partner.

Yuqi grumbled under her breath before draping her arms around your tall frame.

"These goddamn politicians are going to be the death of me..."

You chuckled on what she said.

"Same... Right now we only have two suspects."

"Yeah, we should close this case as soon as we can. By the way, Officer Chan told me that you should check your email soon. He said the mayor's staff sent you a video recording." Your partner explained.

You immediately grabbed your phone then opened your email.

1 unread inbox

You shared a meaningful glance with Yuqi before opening the said message.

A videotape is played which showed Kwon Boa sneaking into the Mayor's office, presumably right before Jiyoung was killed.

"I can't believe this! It's Mrs. Kwon! We should speak to her again right now–"

"Not so fast, Major Song." Chief Kim appeared with some of the SWAT officers behind him.

"Mrs. Kwon can wait, I want you two to go secure the stand where the election's winner will be announced."

"Huh? But Chief we can't lose time on finding–" you tried to argue, but as usual, you were cut off again.

"Finding Mr. Kwon's murderer is top-priority, but so is the election winner's safety! I'm counting on you Inspector Park, go talk to Boa and don't forget to check out the election stand on the way!"

You and your partner had no choice but to follow his orders instantly.

"Every goddamn time, he always cuts us off!" You whined childishly which is pretty rare.

After a few minutes of walking, the two of you arrived at the wide podium. It has two large posters of each party which is hanged opposite to one another. The guest tables were pretty scattered in front of it due to the neglecting visitors who came to watch the awaited conference a while ago.

"Let's split up, you're with the tables then the podium is mine." You instructed Yuqi.

"Yes ma'am!"

The two of you then started to inspect the area thoroughly without missing a single spot. There were a few plant vases on the stage which didn't look suspicious until you saw one that looked a bit unkempt and the soil was disheveled too.

'Oh! Looks like our killer messed up a little, too bad for him...'

You wore your leather gloves before analyzing the vase carefully. It seems like someone previously dug up a hole and covered it carelessly. A smirk crept into your lips as you shoved your hand in the soil and began to try feel any possible foreign object.

"What are you doing?" You looked down to see your partner doubting your current efforts to find a lead.

"I'm searching for any clues? Duh..."

You suddenly felt a hard item and struggled to have a grip on it. After a few seconds of harsh pulling, you finally hauled a small garbage bag with something wrapped completely inside it.

"Look what I got~" you grinned playfully.

"How the fuck did you–"

"I'm going to bring this to the forensic team, have anything useful too?" You asked while stepping down the podium.

"Uh I got this hidden camera on one of the tissue holders, and then I saw this notebook on the floor. The page is torn so I think It looks suspicious so yeah,"

Yuqi handed the portable camera and ripped notebook to you. She also helped on putting all the clues inside your forensic kit whilst you called for Officer Wooseok to pick you up from the city hall.

"I called for Jennie and Joy to help you talk with Mrs. Kwon again, I'm sure you can handle it without me right? I'll go ahead to the station to get this stuff examined." You bid a goodbye to your partner and told her to wait for the other girls.

'Let's see if the fun starts from now on.'

Part 2 coming soon...

--------------

How was ittt? Its my first time writing with these kind of theme sooo yeah hihi 🐶

[shhhselah]

What A Wonderful Life...

​Friday, May 17, 2019

2:35pm

​​"What an interesting life you've caught me in the middle of...."

I caught myself saying this out loud a few weeks ago. That date overhead to be exact.

Life is such a journey. Such a process.

Constantly, we're growing, changing, evolving- never really staying in one spot or settling into one modus operandi. Have you ever heard the phrase, "A master piece and work in progress?" That's truly a concept I feel slips the mind of so many. Even ourselves. We know that we're changing and adjusting, but, honestly, we don't always agree with, like or desire the change we find ourselves going through. Sometimes that change alters us physically, and it may not always be flattering or pleasing.

And other times, we witness emotional, mental and spiritual transformations that either excite us, or frighten us. I've experienced this. We all have. (And actually, correction- I ​​am experiencing this. A season that rattles me because I don't recognize my spiritual surroundings.)

We all have those moments where you take stock of who you are versus who you used to be and find yourself to be a current stranger to the you once known. A stranger in your own body, a foreigner in your own thoughts.

​​When did I get so defensive? When did I become so broken? Why did I stop trusting, smiling, opening up? When did I stop talking, believing, hoping? How did I stop loving? When did I stop truly ​​living? What happened.... to "me?"

And you know what can be so damaging and yet helpful all at once? ​​M e m o r i e s.

See, while it's good to recall memories, it's so harmful to ​​harp on them. We were made to live in the present, it's why our breath comes and goes so steadily instead of staying behind in one spot that we have to consistently travel backwards to in order to reach. We were designed to live in the moment.

Those memories are a blessing. They're an opportunity to view and learn from every present you've ever found yourself in, every gift you've gotten to live in- so that you can walk a little straighter, wiser and freer in the next....but the moment you start harping on those past presents, you neglect all the undivided attention this current one requires. And you live in a duality that brings both anxiousness and confusion.

You bring a nasty case of comparison into the mix. We tend to split our time between nostalgia, trauma, reality and delusions of grandeur. Past. Present. Future.

The both good and bad times of the past, the ever steady action of the present and the unknown possibilities of the future. We live in them all and somehow expect our present selves to maintain order and a standard of satisfactory being that appeases each viewpoint.

Let me set you free here and now-

You will ​​never be completely like your old self- you've gone through too much. So much more than that self of even ​​days ago has experienced. I'm starting to learn and accept that, but it's hard for me on some days when I liked the old version better. What gives me hope, is knowing that God has a greater design for me that He didn't leave in the past, but lays peacefully in every step forward I take. If the past were better, I'd be there. But it's not. There was something there that was still obsolete, untapped and lacking.

What's more, you will ​​never be like your future self- they've witnessed more than the present can presently tell you. Secrets that God has purposed only time to hold.

And understand, your present self is constantly being prepared for the future and shaped by the past. They're under a lot of work. But that work is null in void if you don't allow them to soak up every moment they're in so they can pull something from it and be molded by it.

​​What an interesting life you've caught me in....

Who we're used to being and used to being known as, isn't going to always be the truth of who we are and will be. So set yourself free to forever be a work in progress and masterpiece all at once.

Set yourself free to live life and experience life as it comes. If the day is unpredictable, why can't your growth process be? Don't set restrictions on yourself. Live. What's meant will come and happen, because you have a sovereign God who always starts what He finishes (​​Isaiah 46:9-11). And He calls you His workmanship, His clay, His skillfully and wonderfully made creation in whom He delights.

Trust me, He has an attention to detail and His attention is all yours. You're worth it, and truly, He loves it. So be free, and live in the beautiful, yet startling vulnerability of being creation, where you don't have to constantly create yourself- forever loved and governed by Almighty above.

"12 Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me His own. 13 Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. 15 Let those of us who are mature think this way, and if in anything (in any point) you think otherwise (differently), God will reveal that (make it clear) also to you. 16 Only let us hold true (live up to) to what we have (already) attained."

Philippians 3:12-16

Don't ever feel like you have something to prove. What God has put in you is intrinsic. The areas you walk into were made to build you, be a catalyst that sparks your nature and be a field in which to practice, hone and shine in who you are. You were created for those places.

Your only job is to BE. God will continue to sculpt exactly what that "being" looks like at any given moment, whether seemingly good, bad, ugly or pleasing. That's a part of Surrender- ​​ceasing resistance, submitting to an authority greater than your own, to give up possession of, to deliver up."

Give up your ideas of what you should do, who you should be, and where you should be. It's an act harder done than said, but it's a journey that is best walked with the Creator- who has all the finer details etched out and all the possibilities accounted for- purposing each one for good. (​​Psalm 37:23, Proverbs 16:9, Romans 8:28)

Do you know the difference between Evidence and Proof?

Proof is a biased concept. It seeks to discount one thing and support another.

Evidence is objective. It has no agenda. It is simply there, and its presence tells a story.

The story of God's existence is in the evidence of creation- our world. He tells us this in ​​Romans 1:19-20.

Trees, animals, the ocean, the wind, birds, bees, flowers, and even our complex DNA, they have never moved to prove anything. They simply exist and operate in their nature, and have been a consistent testimony to something greater.

We have sought for years to understand their origin and complexity, ​​our origin and complexity. They derive from the same Caretaker who clothes the fields of grass and feeds the birds of the sky.

​​"25 'Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

34 Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.'"

​​Matthew 6:25-34

You will always feel behind and be behind when you have something to prove.

God is always with us. In every moment. Living in the past or future holds no meaning, it's a trick of the enemy that keeps us between condemnation and striving desperately and futilely beyond grace.

​​"8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them."

​​Ephesians 2:8-10

I've had a habit of pointing to the past to remind God of where I can't go again or where I was better off. I also have a habit (which was the entirety of my 2018), where I take the snippets of what God has shown me He has for me, and I drag Him around and try to drill Him like a sergeant to get me there. The year was saturated with impatience, exhaustion, resentment, bitterness, envy, confusion and hurt.

This life is not yours when you're in Christ. It's His. ​​​​Galatians 2:20 ​​tells us that,

"I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who lives, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me."

And in being His, there are plans, achievements, dreams, timings, and revelations that He's taken on the responsibility to deliver and create. This is not yours to carry.

Why carry something on your own that God told you He'd do Himself? If He put it on your heart, it's for Him to do, not you. Why try to do God's job and be Him? How futile. We fail and stall out when we attempt to take His plans, make them our own and go running off with them.

There is a partnership called Faith. That leads us to Obedience. But we can't obey who we do not serve or even acknowledge. When striving in our own efforts, understandings, assumptions and desires, when do we have time and room to consult the One who prepared our good works ahead of time?

Stay steady with Him in the now. His grace has covered your entire timeline, but reap the benefits of the fresh mercies He purposed for this moment.

​​"22 The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;

   his mercies never come to an end;

23 they are new every morning;

   great is your faithfulness."

​​Lamentations 3:22-23

Don't try to run ahead. Take it from me, it leaves you bitter and worn.

Be spoiled by the God who has already completed the works.

​​"9 Remember the former things of old,

For I am God, and there is no other;

I am God, and there is none like Me,

10 Declaring the end from the beginning,

And from ancient times things that are not yet done,

Saying, ‘My counsel shall stand,

And I will do all My pleasure,’

11 Calling a bird of prey from the east,

The man who executes My counsel, from a far country.

Indeed I have spoken it;

I will also bring it to pass.

I have purposed it;

I will also do it."

​​Isaiah 46:9-11

Prove nothing and never strive . Like evidence, just be, and watch yourself ever unfold on this journey of life as God unravels all the beautiful secrets He's placed down on the inside of you, tucked neatly away in the timeline of your path.

Time to be set free, darlings.

Live. Presently.