#and we have an appointment for her tuesday (theyre squeezing her in bc blood pee is cause for concern)
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#lab bitches and moans#do//n.t re/bl.og#uh. more tags so the next thing i say isnt in the preview#bc i dont want the words to be easily visible#and i dont want to have to tag for them#that should be enough#im. my cat is old and. im realistic okay. im not dumb i know how lifespans work. i know. trust me ive googled cat lifespans enough times#but for a good while now shes been peeing in places besides her litterbox. fine. like gross stinky but fine. no cause for concern#and it was right around the kickoff of the pa/nd.emic so not like we could get her into the vet anyway#but lately theres been blood in her pee like. not a TON but little beads on top of the pee clumps in the litter box#and shes been peeing on the floor a little more which. would be fine. but now its the wrong color#it used to be yellowy (/dried like that anyway bc on tile) but now it is Very Much Orange-Red#and i just saw a fresh puddle thats a Deep Red like. you cannot miss it#and we have an appointment for her tuesday (theyre squeezing her in bc blood pee is cause for concern)#which is. im. im so fucking terrified for tuesday but also the runup thereto#because the last few days she hasnt been coming out from behind the couch as much. and her balance is wobblier. and shes drifting rightward#and a couple months ago her right side gave out entirely under her. shes been stepping heavier on the right ever since#and usually when i go to bed shell follow me to the bathroom to hang out and such right#or if not ill nudge her and shell get up Then (bc i need to close up the room wed been hanging out in)#but tonight when i went to do that she hardly budged. and like. her front half Kinda sat up but she just plopped right back down#and i didnt wanna try harder for fear of hurting her obviously but im so#like. what am i supposed to do. what do i do!! because either we make it to tuesday or we dont. like. Realistically. tuesday is the deadline#bad choice of words but. like i think i know how its gonna go. its. i think i know and i think im. i have no fucking clue what next#and its SO GROSS OF ME that like. i cant even consider it i just go -ah shit so i better do that quiz before the appointment huh-#bc i know that whatever happens during the appt will screw over my ability to focus on the quiz#im just so fucking scared of whatever might happen tuesday#my earliest memories start After This Cat (which is something to be said abt my memory but i digress. we’re Close In Age ok)#and i cannot fucking imagine the reality that i know is coming#im so fucking terrified about what may (or may not!!! even) come to pass on tuesday but like. theres nothing i can do#tuesday is hurtling toward me with a breakneck speed while also moving slower than a goddamn snail and i dont know what to do
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