#and was like... SHIT YVETTE HAS BEEN OBVIOUS THIS WHOLE TIME

[batplushies]

Ivy ESA moments

[smartguyreviewed]

2x2 - Working Guy

Originial air date: September 17, 1997

Did anyone have an actual job when they were teens? I remember how embarassing it was for me, a high schooler in the mid-aughts, to tote around resumes in my little manila folder and then be told to either apply online or have some snooty white asshole at Eddie Bauer all but dismiss me because he was clearly racist. The only jobs I really “held” included being an election judge twice, once during that totally insignificant 2008 presidential race and the other being a summer camp counselor at the church I went to. 

Those little jobs sucked but I chose them. The students of Piedemont High were not that lucky. 

The setting for this episode is the work experience program that shows students what it’s like to have a job. I have a lot of questions. I’m sure some of these students fared better than me back then and already have jobs, so wouldn’t this make no sense? Would they have two jobs? Are all of these jobs suitable for minors? Why does Piedmont fund such strange things?

Mo, as usual, (or depending on the plot of the episode) only cares about the perks of whatever he’s doing. With the band, it’s the girls. With this program, it’s being able to leave school after lunch. Wait, what? They’re having the students skip multiple classes for this? Is this part of a class or an elective? I wonder because this seems like it takes up a lot of time.

TJ is more excited about working in the industry of his choice, but if that was the case, he’d already have a job assigned to him as opposed to having to pick what’s on the board, making it first come, first serve. This is dumb and I can’t believe I have this many questions about a fictional high school. Anyways, TJ is short so he can only grab what he can reach and it’s not what he wants at all because he has a menial blue collar job.

Meanwhile, at the crib, Floyd is pissed because his basketball buddy who is a doctor apparently has cancelled their game because he has to do surgery. Floyd is only petty every once in a while so I’ll let him have this one. Then Marcus comes in wearing a suit and even though we’ve definitely seen him dressed up before, the audience goes wild. I hate canned audience reactions! He says not to hate him because he’s wearing Armani. 

I first thought Marcus was joking because it looks like a Sears original to me, but apparently he took Floyd’s credit card and had a ball buying clothes for his fancy schmancy job. Okay, I have more questions. Marcus had to buy a whole suit and shoes to enter his predominately white workspace. Is Piedmont paying for things the students need to even work at their job? What if you’re a natural black woman and you have to get your hair straightened if you have Marcus’s job? This is all for a part time job during school hours, so will these hours count towards credit since you’re not in class? I am so confused. 

Floyd is surprisingly okay with Marcus running up his card because his next question is asking if he can help Floyd get ready for his game. Marcus jokes that he’s going to be drinking with the guys after work. Floyd doesn’t press further and says he’ll practice alone until Yvette offers. Marcus and Floyd have a nice kii at this because duh, Yvette’s a girl and girls don’t play basketball. I love how all the Henderson men (including Mo) are sexist in their own ways. This isn’t the first time Floyd disregards his daughter when it comes to doing “manly” things and Marcus and TJ bond over their hatred of Yvette when her feminine ways don’t align with their default male ways. 

TJ comes in and doesn’t want to talk because he’s embarassed to have this job that was forced on him. Marcus adds insult to injury by informing him that he’s working at Marcus’s job.

Speaking of Marcus, this dude just doesn’t quit. He begins sexually harassing one of the women who works there, inquiring about what she does. She has to explain to him what a DVD is, immediately dating this show. Luckily, she has sense and shoots down his attempts. Sis can’t even do her job without some horny little high school boy bothering her. This program is stupid, by the way.

TJ enters, wearing his blue collar work uniform and ringing a bell. After fending off the usual “aww he’s so cute” remarks, he’s led into the office that needs the grub. The buffoons working there can’t seem to figure out whatever physics equation makes the DVDs run and of course, TJ is effortlessly able to offer a suggestion. He gets poached from this stupid temp position to help them out.

Floyd and Yvette are practicing in the garage when Marcus and Mo show up to gloat about their temporary yet important positions. Marcus has his own office. I would hate to be the person who worked there for years, sacrificed weekends, holidays and their sanity to get a promotion and their name on a door, only to watch a punk ass intern from high school get it instead. Mo is somehow working for a judge but I’m not sure for how long because this briefcase that was foolishly given to him contains a document that should have already been mailed off to William Renquist. Mo quickly dashes from that scene to deliver the mailpiece. Marcus makes an extremely dark joke that i didn’t even catch at first about someone getting the electric chair due to Mo’s carelessness. I’m sorry but I bellowed at that. However, I question how many lawsuits will be filed against Piedmont after this program is over.

TJ comes home and announces that he quit his blue collar job and is now working as a special consultant for research and development at DVD Electronic. That’s the name of the company? It’s so bland and generic that i sounds like an Amazon seller of used books and shit. Floyd is confused but TJ gets hired by a large company every other week so it’s whatever.

At work, we see TJ has his own office. Remember that person I would hate to be? They have to watch a fucking 10 year old get it instead. Maybe they did a mass firing or something because they seem to have plenty of rooms to just give to people. Of course, TJ likes the new digs. After his friendly secretary introduces him to his space, the resident hater shows up. I guess the person I was describing earlier is this white man, because man is he salty about having to share a cubicle when he started. White man is now attempting to get into TJ’s head and asks that he pitch all ideas to him first. How TJ, who is probably a psycho or sociopath didn’t see through this as a ruse for him to profit off his black ass ideas is beyond me. Or maybe TJ is faking dumb so that when he does reveal white man’s treachery, it’s more believeable? 

Marcus barges in and the white man is two seconds away from calling the cops before Marcus lets him know they’re related. But white man thinks him calling TJ his brother is a “black” thing until TJ says they are related albeit with similar genetic coding. I assume this is an obvious reference to Marcus being darker than him? Funny because I just wonder if Floyd’s wife was dark or if they both have a dark skinned parents and it just so happened to manifest in Marcus and no one else? Or maybe Marcus is actually his half-son? Let me stop. 

After the white man leaves, Marcus correctly assumes he is a piece of shit but TJ disagrees. He then gets a call to join a meeting. The head boss who is stationed in Zurich makes it a point to consider that TJ’s work study day ends at 5--wait, so they’re away from school for that long?--but quickly ignores that tidbit when some meeting gets pushed to 6. Of course, TJ shouldn’t be here unsupervised and out this late but we’re gonna ignore that even if the logistics of the Piedmont Work Study Program still boggle my mind.

So yeah, TJ is stuck at work and being asked about one of his ideas, the big boss says that the white man told him to filter all ideas through him. The white man is clearly displeased with TJ snitching but the boss man ends up making TJ the new head of the project. That’s how you use your privilege, even if it is child endangerment! The hating white man (whose name is Dick Ferrett by the way) comments to another coworker that TJ is toast. How dare this little black bastard be better than him?

Meanwhile, at home, Floyd is nursing an Yvette inflicted wound from when they were practicing basketball. TJ comes home acting like a middle aged adult, complaining about work and how bad traffic was. When Floyd notices how TJ is being affected by this job, he suggests that he quit. TJ whines for a little bit and Floyd relents. What the fuck Floyd, drag him by his collar and make him sit down! TJ promises to make Floyd’s game which means he won’t be able to make it because of work.

The next day, TJ is at work and discussing things with his secretary. The hating white man is just itching to fuck up TJ’s day and it shows. You might not be wondering who replaced TJ as the chow wagon boy but it turns out that it was Mo. Yes, instead of being fired from this program that he had no business being in to begin with, he was demoted to TJ’s job.

TJ is about to leave for the day when hating ass white man comes and dumps a bunch of work on TJ’s desk. See? Told you he wouldn’t be able to make Floyd’s game! Luckily, his secretary is going to film it for him.

Back at work, TJ is falling asleep trying to carry these stooges to a victory and the hating ass white man is actually calling TJ names. They even go back and forth for a moment. Floyd finally decides that enough is enough and he’s bogarted his way through security to get TJ because I’m sure it’s midnight at this point. TJ tells Floyd he must be mad that the game was missed. Floyd says he isn’t mad although the other guys’ kids showed up. Aww Flody. Parents have feelings, too.

The head white boss offers Floyd to hire TJ permanently but Floyd declines. TJ is able to get the hating ass white man fired before he leaves, in a move that is definitely petty but deserved. Fuck that guy, exploiting a gifted black child like that.

TJ is mad at Floyd according to a conversation between Yvette and himself. He thinks TJ is going to be mad at him forever but he comes downstairs and asks to play dominos with him. Aww. This is quickly ruined as per the usual. We all know TJ only abruptly forgives and forgets when he has an ulterior motive. This time, he’s going behind Floyd’s back to keep working with DVD Electronics. Floyd comes in during a session. I’m assuming he got his ass whooped after this but we just fade to black before an arms-folded Floyd can dole out any punishment. Eh, guess we’ll find out in the next episode. Ha. No we won’t.

Stuff I noticed:

- DVD Electronics video chat has a pretty stellar, crisp quality for 90s internet.

- Mo rewore this shirt from a prior episode. I really like when characters rewear clothes. It’s much more realistic than characters who seem to always have money for new outfits no matter how broke they claim to be.

- When TJ is bringing in the food, there’s an audience member who yells “You go, girl!” I have heard this woman in the audience of a Boy Meets World episode and another show that I can’t recall, but further proves that canned laughter is creepy and needs to be banned everywhere.

[dragonbagel]

i’ll be there for you - rhysha

A scav gang infiltrates Atlas in search of a siren-- a siren that happens to be Rhys. Turning himself in has "bad idea" written all over it, but when the lives of his friends are put at risk, he finds he has no other choice.

-*takes place after "show me why you're strong"*-

Rhys and Sasha were in the middle of pulling off each other’s clothes during a heated make-out session in Rhys’ room at Atlas headquarters when the emergency alarm went off.

Sasha groaned, letting her hands fall back into her lap from where they’d been in the middle of undoing Rhys’ belt buckle. “Seriously?”

Rhys looked similarly annoyed, especially because he’d almost gotten Sasha’s bra off. “I swear to god, these assholes can’t handle themselves for five freaking minutes.”

He frowned, and Sasha looked on with a prideful smirk at the way his lips were slightly swollen from their frantic kissing. They hadn’t seen each other in weeks, and their reunion (which had been one of the happiest surprises Rhys had ever received) had quickly divulged into desperate passion; spending far too many lonely nights sending less than professional photos and texts just wasn’t the same as the real thing, leaving both of them more than a bit pent up.

“You should probably go check it out, mister CEO,” Sasha said regrettably.

“Can’t we just have five more minutes?” Rhys pouted, gaze still trained on Sasha’s chest.

She chuckled as she kissed him again before reaching to readjust her bra and slip her shirt back on. “Don’t worry; when we get back here, I’ll more than make up for lost time.”

The sexy glint in her eyes had Rhys scrambling to fix his clothing into something somewhat presentable, desperate to return to what would no doubt involve a blowjob and mind-blowing sex as soon as possible. His pants felt way too tight, and he flushed as Sasha laughed.

“What?” he said, focusing way too intently on the shoes he was putting on. “You already know you’re like, super hot, and it kind of, um, does its own thing.”

He gestured to his crotch, for the first time a bit annoyed at just how well the surgery had worked. But with the way the alarms were still annoyingly blaring, he didn’t really have any choice other than investigating with a hopefully not super obvious boner.

Sasha just rolled her eyes, sliding on her boots with far more grace than Rhys. “Come on, let’s turn these stupid alarms off before I get a headache.”

Rhys nodded, opening the door and holding it open for Sasha before locking it with his ECHOeye. They made their way up from the underground level to the main facility, Sasha cringing as Rhys paused with a sharp intake of breath at the sight before them. The laboratory looked like a goliath had raged through it, tables overturned and prototypes strewn across the floor. Rhys sunk to his knees at the broken pieces of the gun he’d been dedicating nearly every waking hour to (when he wasn’t stuck dealing with business aspects that Vaughn and Yvette weren’t qualified for).

“Shit,” he said, his crestfallen expression compelling Sasha to place a comforting hand on his shoulder. “They- they destroyed it.”

He hadn’t realized his tattoos had started to glow from the rush of emotions he was feeling until Sasha quietly pointed it out, and he tried to focus his energy on cooling them down rather than thinking about the ruins his company was in.

“Rhys, there you are!”

He glanced up at Yvette’s voice, his friend and colleague glaring at him. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere! We need you to turn the damn alarm off and--”

She paused when she noticed the corroded remains of the work that had practically consumed him for the past few months. “Shit, Rhys, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize.”

“It’s fine,” Rhys said gruffly, turning away from what felt like his murdered child and pushing himself up to stand. His ECHOeye glowed yellow for a few moments, and the alarm soon subsided.

“Finally,” Yvette said with a sigh, folding her arms across her orange business jacket. “Vaughn’s waiting for you in your office.”

Rhys nodded, following her as Sasha trailed behind him. “So what set off the alarm?”

Yvette shrugged. “We’re not totally sure yet. It seems like some sort of sabotage attempt.”

Rhys’ shoulders went rigid at her words, and he forced himself to keep his tattoos in check; there was no way he was about to have that whole “I’m a siren” conversation now, least of all with his emotionally-challenged friend.

Vaughn was waiting for them when they entered the office, fiddling with his glasses as he leaned against the edge of Rhys’ desk. “Thank god you’re okay, bro.”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Rhys tried to smile, but he was pretty sure it came off as more of a grimace.

“I think someone broke into the HQ,” Vaughn said, readjusting his glasses as he placed them back onto his face. “Looks like they hacked our systems.”

“Who?” Rhys asked, rounding the corner of the desk and turning on his computer.

“I don’t know,” Vaughn admitted. “I tried to track them, but they blocked all the signals.”

Rhys grit his teeth; his company was under attack, and it seemed like there was nothing he could do about it. After all the time he’d spent trying to rebuild it-- could it really end like this?

His earlier question of the enemy’s identity was soon answered as a gunshot rang out and the door to his office was flung open by a hard kick. Everyone in the room took a step backwards at the sudden noise, their eyes immediately drawn to the heavily armed assailant in front of them. The woman grinned, revealing a few golden teeth from beneath the scarred gash running diagonally across the purple skin of her face. It reminded Rhys of Jack’s scar, and he shuddered involuntarily.

“Which one of you fuckers is in charge?”

Her voice was rough, like she’d been chain-smoking since birth. She didn’t look much older than Rhys, but her blood-stained military-grade outfit was far more intimidating than Rhys’ knockoff designer suit. Nobody responded, the air heavy with tension.

“One of y’all best answer me, or my people will open fire on all your fancy lil’ worker bees downstairs.”

The practiced way with which she handled her pistol and the hardened look on her face made it clear she’d follow through with her threat, and Rhys started forward before before Sasha stopped him with a well-aimed kick to his shin. He hissed in pain, turning and fixing her with a “what the hell” look. The way she shook her head was nearly imperceptible, but her message rang loud and clear: she wanted him to stay hidden.

The problem was, the message of the invading woman, whoever the hell she was, was much louder and clearer.

“It’s me,” he said, stepping out from behind the desk. “I’m in charge.”

The woman pursed her lips, as if she didn’t quite believe him. “What’s a scrawny thing like you doin’ with a company like this? Tryin’ to act like a big boy?”

Rhys huffed. “I’m perfectly qualified for this position. Now, tell me what you want with me before I call security on you.”

The woman’s expression was the epitome of patronizing. “Don’t try actin’ tough, honey. It’s not a good look on you.”

“Don’t call me that,” Rhys growled, clenching his flesh hand into a fist. “And you’d better answer me; what. Do. You. Want?”

“Didn’t your mama ever teach you manners?” She sneered at him. “You’re supposed to say ‘please,’ sweetheart.”

When Rhys just continued to glare at her, she finally threw up her hands in defeat to gratify him with an answer. “Fine,” she said, scowling. “I’ll be honest: I don’t really care about your shitty company. I just want your secret weapon.”

Rhys raised his brow, not following. “Excuse me?”

“Don’t play dumb,” she replied. “We know you’ve got a siren locked up here somewhere.”

Rhys froze before realizing he should probably maintain his composure. “What? We don’t have a siren!”

The woman’s body language made it clear she didn’t believe him in the slightest. “Don’t bullshit me.”

“I’m not bullshitting you!” Rhys spluttered.

The woman took a step closer to him, the proximity of her pistol causing him to flinch. “Don’t play games with me, boy. We Darksiders may be a lot of things, but we ain’t stupid.”

“Darksiders?” Rhys asked nervously. He’d heard horror stories about that scav gang, and he knew they were definitely bad news.

“You heard me,” she said, placing the hand not holding the gun on her hip. “I’m Colonel Lara Anthony, second-in-command. And if you don't start talkin’, I’m gonna shoot your friends dead.”

Rhys glanced over his shoulder to see Vaughn’s face frozen in fear, Yvette looking just as terrified but trying to mask it in a glower. Sasha had a strange look on her face, although he soon was forced to turn back to face Lara as she gripped his cheeks with her hand.

“Last chance to answer me.”

Rhys shook his head, trying to get her hand off of him; it was difficult, what with her iron grip and the way she was nearly as tall as him. “I told you, there’s no siren here!”

“Fine,” she said, narrowing her eyes. “Guess we’ll have to find ‘em ourselves.” She clicked on the communication device strapped to her shoulder.  “Boys, start lookin’ through the girls downstairs. Kill anyone that gets in your way.”

“No, wait, please don’t--”

Rhys didn’t have a chance to finish his sentence before a bullet whizzed past him, aimed directly towards Lara’s head. He hadn’t even noticed Sasha pulling out a gun, and his heart filled with pride at just how smart she was.

Then he realized that the bullet hadn’t hit, instead bouncing off of the shield clipped to Lara’s hip.

“Get down!” he shouted as he ducked for cover, narrowly avoiding the shot fired from the pistol just inches from his face.

When he came to the conclusion that he should be dead at such a close range, that the bullet wasn’t meant for him, it was too late; the bullet had already lodged itself in Sasha’s shoulder.

“Fuck!” she shouted, her other hand clutching at the red stain starting to blossom underneath her shirt.

“Sasha!” Rhys yelled, unsure of whether he was more scared or furious.

“I gave you your chance,” Lara hissed, clicking another bullet into the chamber and reaching to slide an SMG out of her other thigh holster.

Rhys felt stuck in place, unable to move even as Lara’s next words, ordered over her shoulder to the soldiers standing behind her, washed over him: “Take out these fuckers. We don’t need 'em no more.”

“No, stop, stop, I’ll pay you, I’ll give you anything, I’ll--” Rhys’ mouth went dry, unable to choke any more words out as he heard the unmistakable sound of gunshots.

Then everything went white. Rhys scrunched his eyes shut at the flux of energy coursing through his veins and burning through him. When he opened them again, he froze at the realization of what he’d done.

He’d phaselocked.

The bullets previously barreling towards him and his friends were suspended in the cloud of energy before him, just as still as everyone around him. His tattoos were glowing so bright that they shone from beneath his various layers, and he knew his wings must be visible at his back. Both Lara and Yvette had taken a step back in shock, while Vaughn and Sasha looked more mournful than anything.

“I don’t believe it,” Lara breathed, her surprise morphing into a hungry grin.

Rhys felt his energy dwindling, the combination of his emotional instincts to protect those he loved and the residual power boost from eridium exposure in the vault still not enough to keep up with such an expenditure without actual, physical eridium in his system. Rhys fell to his knees in exhaustion as the suspension portal he’d created disappeared, the bullets clattering onto the floor. The light of his tattoos continued to pulse, but Rhys felt completely drained.

“Leave them alone,” he said, well aware that his voice sounded as tired as he felt. “You can have me, just leave them alone.”

“Rhys, stop,” Sasha hissed, still trying to staunch the blood flowing from the wound.

“Rhys, huh?” Lara mused, squishing his face between his fingers once again. Her nails, which were a shade of violet slightly darker than the rest of her body, dug into his skin, and Rhys bit his lip to keep from whimpering. “Weird name.”

Rhys laughed bitterly, trying to maintain his confident facade. “If I had a nickel for every time someone said that to me, I’d be paying my way off this planet in no time.”

The way that Lara’s face split into a grin made Rhys feel nauseous, and he probably would’ve puked if he had the energy to do so; he was having trouble forcing his mouth to form words at that point, nearly on the brink of passing out.

“Don’t worry, kid,” she said, her face way too close to Rhys’ for comfort. “We’ll be leaving this shithole soon.”

Rhys barely had time to register the metallic collar being removed from Lara’s pocket, still trying to comprehend her words through fog in his brain, before the device was slipped around his neck, locking in place with a click. It pressed against Rhys’ windpipe, and he had to make a conscious effort to get more air into his lungs.

“You shouldn’t exist, you know,” Lara mused, her nails dragging down Rhys’ jaw and neck before tearing open the top few buttons of his shirt. The silence in the room aside from the heavy breathing allowed Rhys to hear every echoing bounce of the pieces of plastic as they skidded across the floor. Rhys felt goosebumps rise on his skin as Lara traced the swirling pattern beneath his collarbones, the aggressiveness a stark contrast to Sasha’s gentle, wandering touch.

“Don’t touch him!” Sasha snarled, trying to stalk forwards to pry the woman off of Rhys before the shotgun pointed towards her by one of Lara’s underlings stopped her in her tracks. She knew Rhys was too weak to protect her if a shell started to hurtle her way, and the weird collar around his neck seemed to exhaust him even further.

Rhys looked guiltily towards her before a yank on the collar forced him to turn around.

“What are you, siren boy?” Lara hissed, pulling up on the collar and forcing Rhys to his feet.

The pressure on his neck made it practically impossible for him to speak, and even if he could respond, he had no idea what the hell he’d say. That he was some freak of nature? That he’d tried to change everything about himself but failed?

“Let’s go!” she barked to her lackies before tugging Rhys after her. “I need some time to get to know our new friend.”

“What about the others?” one Darksider asked, jerking a thumb towards Rhys’ friends.

“Leave ‘em,” Lara replied. “We got what we came for.”

“No, wait!” Vaughn shouted, having finally found his voice. “You can’t take him!”

Lara cocked a brow, reached with her free hand to aim the pistol at her hip at Vaughn. “What was that, Shorty?”

“Don’t,” Rhys rasped, voice quiet and strained. “It’s okay. Just- just take care of her.”

He wasn’t quite sure if he was referring to his company or his girlfriend, but the looks on both Vaughn and Sasha’s faces showed they both got the message.

“I’m sorry,” he said, stumbling after Lara as she began to drag him away.

Lara muttered something about finding the nearest Fast Travel station, and before Rhys’ friends could even react, the Darksiders had left the office, the unoiled door squeaking shut behind them.

The three exchanged worried glances as the truth of what had just happened sunk in: a gang of scavengers had threatened to kill off the entire Atlas base in search of a siren. A siren that happened to be Rhys, who’d given himself up to save his friends. And now he was gone, taken off-planet to who knows where.

“What do we do?” Vaughn said, sniffling as he realized he was crying; he really did love his bro.

Sasha shook her head, apparently too emotional to even answer him.

Surprisingly, it was Yvette who finally responded. “We’re taking Sasha to the medic. And then, we’re getting Rhys back.”

read the rest on ao3

[smartguyreviewed]

2x1 - Primary Brothers

Original air date: September 10, 1997

Season 2, what it do? Yes, the first season only had 7 whole episodes and now we are back. I hope everyone enjoyed heartwearming TJ in the last ep, because we’re getting a full push back into manipulative TJ. And what better setting for this little villain than politics?

It all starts with TJ, home from school and hoppin’ mad, slamming shit down and just letting his little lips pucker all the way out. The source of his ire is the broke ass science club at school. They have no money for anything cool. TJ, hon, you go to a predominately black public school that has no money for AP classes, so what did you expect? Go make some dry ice or something.

Floyd asks why Piedmont isn’t paying for its more intellectual extracurriculars and Yvette says the funds are allocated by the student council. It’s the reason why the Penguins got new gear even though their team is shitty. I get that Floyd is just trying to do his best here, but he’s completely out of touch by saying TJ should run for president. Yvette has to quickly shut that down by reminding TJ that it’s nothing but a popularity contest that a 10 year old has a chance in hell of winning. I personally remember when I foolishly ran for president in grade school. Quickly learned that nothing beats being tall, a guy and promising everyone Pokemon cards if they voted for you. This world is unfair, I tell you!

Even Floyd has to admit that Yvette is right, but TJ notoriously doesn’t take n for an answer and never accepts defeat. He decides to run anyway, with astoundingly bad results. These posters certainly don’t help. 

Yvette checks in on TJ after Mo chides him for not having food. He tells Yvette that he’s failing and she reminds him of the missing height and age that would make running easier. We know where this is going. In true political form, TJ decides to make someone his puppet. Enter Marcus, who isn’t interested at first, but the moment a cute girl shows up and strokes his ego just a teensy bit, he decides to run. TJ is so annoyed that he breaks the fourth wall.

Now we’re on the campaign trail and first up are the “science dorks” as Marcus so eloquently puts it. When they roll up on the clique, one of them actually flinches. I’m just confused because Marcus doesn’t seem to have a bullying bone in his body but apparently he pantsed this kid. Weird. After mispronouncing the name of a comet, Marcus gets clowned a bit, but reassures them that their issues will be heard.

Next up is the jock table and Marcus easily wins this one by promising them a peek at the new Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue after school. Ah, the days when you actually had to turn pages to get your fap on. 

Last but not least are the ladies. Now, if Marcus wanted to gain points in my book, he’d pressure the administration to get the girls free pads and tampons because they shouldn’t even have to buy them to begin with. Or he’d make sure to protect them from unwanted sexual attention on campus. But it’s okay because apparently, they don’t want those things either! All they want is a better sound system for dances. TJ is mad that Marcus is following his dick when the plan was to raise money for his science club.

Marcus however, has grown to like this and wants to continue to run alone. Good for you, Marcus! Don’t let that little pipsqueak boss you around. 

Yvette always seems to be around whenever she needs to point out the obvious to TJ, so here she is, reminding TJ that Marcus is popular and has a real chance at winning. TJ realizes he needs to nab someone else with that popular proximity. Enter Mo. Because TJ can’t just do one thing at a time, he figures he can both win this election and break up his brother’s only real friendship in one go. 

TJ is able to convince Mo that he’s in Marcus’s shadow because Mo is a lowly bass player and Marcus sings lead. But...it’s Marcus’s band! And what’s wrong with being a bass player? This doesn’t even make any sense for Mo to entertain because as we saw before, he clearly doesn’t even care what happens to the band as long as the puss keeps flowing. It’s really annoying to watch him blindly believe anything TJ says, especially when he’s not even really “friends” with TJ. Part of me would even think TJ is still mad about him getting kicked out of the band even though he deserved it. Wow, one bird and three stones, the third being possibly ruining Mackadocious.

Marcus comes around, being uncharacteristically mean to Mo and belittiling him for the plot’s sake. Mo naturally takes offense and now he has ammo to run against Marcus. TJ is a petty--yet brilliant-- little asshole.

At home, Marcus lets Floyd in on what’s been up and how he dropped TJ from his campaign that he didn’t even wanna run for in the first place. Daddy Flody is sad because for a moment because TJ and Marcus were actually getting along. Once he knows that Mo has replaced Marcus, he’s confused, The only one who wanted the damn science club fixings in the first place was TJ. I don’t get why he’s confused though. Doesn’t he remember what his son is capable of? He should totally know that TJ orchestrated all of this, but TJ just shrugs, pretending he doesn’t know why Mo of people is now his running mate. Do better, Flody.

Since this episode is about mudslinging and typical political treachery, Mo as TJ’s stand in is making fun of Marcus to the originally intended demographic. Yvette comes up to TJ and asks if he and his puppet are ready for the debate, and TJ deadass says Mo isn’t a puppet, “he’s a real boy.” Yvette just stopped by to say they’re filming the debate and she’s hosting. 

In the midst of all this sneaky fighting and smear campaigns, Marcus actually comes to Mo and tries to apologize for being a dick earlier. Aww, Marcus. Too bad TJ is about to shit all over this because he’s watching and once Mo hears this olive branch, TJ is able to convince Mo that Marcus is trying to bait-and-switch Mo to shake him up for the debate. Marcus insists that it is genuine but TJ wins Mo over by just telling him things to repeat. At this point, Marcus is over trying to be nice and says autonomy is the shit. Mo says fuck autonomy and leaves with TJ to prepare for the debate.

I love how Yvette leans into this husky, reporter voice for the television. She even put on her best two piece lilac suit. She introduces the candidates and is baffled when she realizes that Mo has had his extracurriculars beefed up. When Yvette asks when Mo was in all those clubs, TJ says since earlier that day and that he can prove it. I’m sure that he committed a crime here with these fake documents, but it’s pretty on brand for him to do, so whatever. The view count for the debate goes down when Yvette starts going off into how long each candidate has to talk about issues and honestly, I probably would have left, too. This is a high school student council election, for crying out loud. Her audience went from this:

To this:

Mo and Marcus get into a fight over the stupidest thing: who calls heads or tails. After they start elbowing each other, a physical fight breaks out. Again, TJ tries to break it up, even though he just, you know, only is the reason they’re fighting right now. Intervening gets TJ some new eye makeup. But TJ hasn’t learned shit because at home, nursing his black eye, he is still trying to manipulate the two into being friends again. 

Floyd has to remind TJ that hey, you can’t just play with people like that, even if you have good intentions. It finally sinks in that TJ could have very possibly ruined a friendship and broken up a band in one go. Floyd tells him to fess up to the boys and prepare for another ass whooping. Luckily, Mo and Marcus are guys and guys tend to resolve conflict--with each other--fairly fast. Mo comes over and gives something back to Marcus and just as he’s leaving, Marcus invites him back in to watch television. They chat and Mo reciprocates the olive branch with a pound. I really love these two together! They have so much chemistry that I honestly would be heartbroken if I learned that they stop talking after Smart Guy. Anyways, I ship it, Marcus x Mo forever. 

Stuff I noticed:

- Yvette is her middle name. Her first name is Tasha!

- Welp, guess the white guy is still president.

- Pretty sure this may not have been intentional, but I love that there is a black girl at the science dorks table. We love our black girl nerds!