#and view them as stuck up because you think they're only selling to their definition of a real fan

[sillynui]

i see a lot of confusion and outrage about these sort of requirements before being able to purchase this doll Which is fair since it is very unusual to demand these sorts of things when it comes to selling merch in western fan spheres so i wanted to explain a little and share some niche knowledge about a niche community:)

this sort of thing is really not uncommon when it comes to the sale of attribute dolls within the cotton doll community and basically it’s... just to prevent scalping. rip. scalping is a huge issue in the cotton doll community, any quick scroll through mercari jp will prove it. dolls bought directly from the doll creator are typically anywhere between 14-24 usd, but resale prices often shoot between 60-150 usd. it’s nuts. these types of dolls are entirely fan made and fan funded, which is why they’re so cheap and why the doll creators especially tend to hate scalpers.

obv the op of the twitter post isn’t the doll creator or anything like that though haha, it seems like they’re just reselling so maybe this is a little off topic. i just wanted to share 

here’s an example of a resell on mercari jp, exact same doll just to compare and to get an idea of how bad the original base price has been inflated. Insanity

twitter enstarries are on another level

[reonnex]

Wesper Fanfic wip

This is a wip of a wesper fic I had been writing! I know I should be updating my own fic but I was kinda stuck on the next chapter and decided to write something else for a break as that has been the only thing I've been working on since middle of April :)

Note that this is not edited at all and only one small section of it! (Minor cw for mentions of the tonics Jan Van Eck gave wylan and his not so great parenting skills)

. . . . . . . . . . . . .

Jesper laughed after a joke Wylan had made, setting the bottle of vodka down on the table infront of them as the night continued on.

Jesper and Wylan had just finished a report on the lastest stocks and had been able to sell some new business that they had been stressing about the past few weeks, which they had to celebrate the fact.

Marya was staying away a few days visting Plumje and Alys who Marya viewed as family as well. She didn't see her as a daughter but did family even need a label?

Wylan had been worried about how Marya and Alys would get along, but he had nothing to worry about! Sure there was a little tension at first. Marya being Van Ecks first wife he tried to kill and Alys having to deal with Van Eck now in Hellgate. But after just a few hours the two became inseparable. Gossping and grinning like friends who kne each other for years.

So naturally, Jesper and Wylan had the night to themselves.

Like school boys breaking into their parents wine collection, Wylan had grabbed a few bottles from the wine celler a laughing giggling mess as he handed one to Jesper.

About only thirty minutes in to the night, Wylans cheeks were bright red now with a lopsided smile and his eyes seemed a bit unfosued.

"Im just saying-" Wylan giggled as the drink sloshed in his hand. "Think about it! Talking is just so interesting! Me just moving my mouth is sending vibrations through the air- Soundwaves- like how does thay even work? How can my body store information in my brain and I can transfer that data out by vibrations so perfect that they form sounds? Or words? For that matter why cant an instrument make words? Why can't an instrument talk to us!" He asked with full seriousness.

"Saints Wy you're such a lightweight." Jesper had laughed shaking his head. "You haven't even had a full bottle yet."

"Psh- I've drunk before! Drank...? I am drunk but I have drank plenty of times."

Jesper laughed out again. He could feel the tug of the acholol on him as well, and was definitely starting to feel drunk right now.

But definitely not as drunk as Wylan.

"You went to mercher parties growing up. How are you this drunk over not even one bottle?"

Because the ones they served at those parties are weak!" Wylan snorted. "They're like- sparkling water. And for your information Jesper Llewellyn Fahey." He teased. "I was too young to drink anything there before my father stopped taking me out in public. " He chuckled, as a unsettling feeling crept into Jesper at that comment. "The barrel though. Now this is drunk material." He held the glass up to the sky. "If this was given out to Merchers then...they would pass out. No one would be able to hold their liqueur. Maybe Kaz should replace them all next time if he wants to know secrets so badly."

Jesper laughed and shook his head again as he drank from his own glass, amused by Wylans rant.

"I used to hate drinking." He said after a moment.

"Im shocked." Jesper replied, gesturing to the now empty bottle sitting on the table infront of them.

Wylan shoved him playfully, resulting in Jesper snickering.

"Im serious!" He slurred out. "Did you know that acholol orginally was made up from rice, honey, and hawthron fruit?"

"I did not." Jesper smiled.

"Yeah! Though it could of just been grapes but it was found in residue clay pots in Shu-Han like- thousands upon thousands of years ago."

Jesper could listen to Wylan ramble for hours.

"Well technically acholol is just the name of a whole rang of molecules that are formed when oxygen and hydrogen atoms bind with an atom of carbon." Wylan explained as he drank more from his glass, frowning when nothing came out before looking back to Jesper. "But in alcoholic drinks, acholol is just the specific small molecule, ethanol." He replied.

"The ethanol....ethanol..." he snapped his fingers as if trying to find the word before finally continuing on. "Taste reminded me of my medication."

What?

"Medication?" Jesper frowned. This was not the direction he expected this coveration to go.

"Yeah!" Wylan smiled out. "Couldn't stand the smell of it for like the longest time. I would get nauseous and worry the doctor my father hired would give me more." Wylan said with such little care.

"Slow down what medicine?" Jesper asked, moving to place his drink down before leaning back on the couch, looking at Wylan worriedly.

"You know! The medication to cure me. To...to try to fix my brain to get me to read? I told you about it didnt I?"

No. No Wylan didn't.

[mandy4ever69420]

opinion on sheila?

i don't care for her. as a person. i've found her miscellaneous shenanigans a lot more enjoyable upon rewatch, though, since i'm no longer trying to find a way to still like her as a person. it's very sad for me to not like her because she is played by JOAN CUSACK whom i adore + naturally she fucking kills it in her performance. alas she is not dom top rosalie mullins from school of rock 😔

i contemplated leaving my response at that but i DO in fact think she's really interesting! i thought, you know, some other people have made Some posts about how she fucks up but tbh, come to think of it, usually they only go so far as to say "she did bad thing, therefore bad" and dont go past that! which is tragic. SO i'm going to. i hope.

please keep in mind as you read this that my biggest problem with sheila is her attempt to, as a white christian woman, adopt and raise a handful of native american children, which is a facet of cultural genocide (article II, item e) that the ICWA was literally created to prevent. i also dislike her for other reasons, but this is the biggest

sheila is probably the strongest example within shameless of a character being cute, charismatic, or "nice" on the surface, in a way that really powerfully distracts from the type of harm they're capable of.

particularly, in addition to being "nice" and carrying joan cusack's INCREDIBLE charisma, sheila is also disabled! she's terrified of a lot of things, and mocked by her husband for it. she absolutely deserves sympathy for her struggles with agoraphobia and a LOT of people conflate sympathizing with someone with having to accept their behavior. this is the flip-side of people not understanding that someone who has done something scary or messed up still has a sympathetic internal experience.

season one has sheila most of the time unable to enact harm because of her limiting circumstances. although she repeatedly ignores frank's sexual boundaries, he's also definitely taking advantage of her hospitality the entire time. frank often will lose sympathy points by acting horrifically in other ways, sheila's behavior will be ignored for how sympathetic she is. in season one, sheila also APPEARS to be a great and supportive mother to karen, specifically because of the contrast in how overtly judgemental and controlling eddie is. while watching this show with a friend of mine, she made the great observation that when sheila comes out of her shell a bit, you can really see how she wound up married to such a stuck up conservative asshole.

even so, sheila's inability to support her daughter hurts her. that's not to say she's at fault for the way her agoraphobia leaves karen feeling adrift, just that it happened. i really like season 1 sheila. karen also spends a lot of time feeling that it's her responsibility to take care of sheila, and while it's extremely nice of her to do, the fact is that sheila needed an adult's support, not her teenage daughter's. when karen spends so much time acting protective towards sheila, which sheila was undoubtedly both touched and embarrassed by, i think this also pushes forward into both of their minds the way that sheila views karen in some ways as more of a bestie/equal than a child under her care.

note also here - sheila seems to have no grown up friends! there are a couple times when she tries to branch out (christianmingle, selling sex toys) but they don't seem to work out. she even sort of alludes to knowing people at her old job at a hair salon, but she seems to never have actually be close to them, just sort of friendly. she is extremely lonely, probably since even before she developed agoraphobia.

sheila is loud and brash and strange, which masks in ways that she may also be very very insecure. it makes sense if she only bonds with little kids if she's terrified of the judgement of an adult. (this is also a problem with kash - though obviously, kash takes this in a worse direction by pursuing ian romantically). she's also GOOD with little kids. she absolutely is not good with teenagers. i would absolutely trust her to watch a toddler, i don't think there's any real problem with that.

however, please see: sheila playing with liam, she asks him "which do you prefer, the baby, or the whore?" this line is hilarious. it also points to her having more or less the same conservative view of sexuality that results in karen's DaddyzGirl plotline. it feels relevant she uses a blonde barbie to represent the "whore".

sheila also seems more involved in catholicism than the gallagher family. to be sure, the gallaghers are catholic, but i didn't get the impression that it was as much of a religious identity to them as something they just inherited and went with.

by the time jody shows up in karen's plotline, sheila is established so aggressively as being kooky and unable to handle a lot of the "real world", that when i recall thinking, oh, well, she shouldn't be letting this guy around her daughter, but i'm not sure she understands whats happening. and it's true she probably didn't. part and parcel to her viewing karen as more of a best friend than a child in here care, and her inability to understand teenagers the way she does littler kids - she just defaults to trying to interact with karen as another adult.

sheila being more catholic also adds an interesting layer to how much she wants karen to go out with jody, given that karen is a bisexual girl, even if sheila might not be aware of that.

i assume we're already in agreement that she shouldn't have allowed karen to marry a 37 year old - which she definitely had to consent to. in an interesting parallel here with my general read of mickey being the karen to ian's lip, the united states does allow people under 18 to get married, but only with a parent's consent. mickey is the only other character i can think of whose parent gives such horrifying and enthusiastic consent to their marriage (and, similarly - both lip and ian show up to these weddings, get drunk, and make an ass of themselves)

sheila viewing karen as a best friend more so than a daughter also is what leads her to believe it's acceptable, just kind of bitchy, to sleep with jody. jody is another incredibly immature adult. this is a running and well executed theme in most of the predatory characters on this show. karen didn't want him, and sheila later apologizes for all the wrong reasons.

sheila obviously gets hit with another massive wave of loneliness and regret after she kicks her daughter out - she doesn't seem to understand that attempting to force someone to keep an unwanted pregnancy or child is a surefire way to ruin a relationship, and almost certainly thought that karen would go into playing this "sweet little girl" role she expects of having a cute, blonde, daughter. this also shows up in sheila's idealization of karen's relationship to jody. sheila can't accept that karen is outspoken and independent, she wants karen to be a housewife and a princess - karen apparently loved princess stories as a small child (or sheila thought she did), and sheila is unable to accept that that's changed - and she wants jody to be the prince in this story.

even when karen comes back, sheila still can't wrap her head around karen not being obligated to be a mother. she's horrified to learn that karen had told hymie's father's family that sheila "wasn't safe", when karen just wanted desperately to go back to before, because she wanted her mom to love her, and she wanted to feel close, without the imposition of an unwanted child from a traumatic pregnancy.

this might be a reflection of the disaster that was sheila's marriage - a lot of women will try to make up for what they feel they missed out on by projecting onto their daughters' lives. sometimes this is just awkward, but sheila decides to send her brain damaged, absolutely unable to consent, daughter off with jody. when karen becomes disabled sheila sees her no longer as a best friend, but more like a doll. come to think of it, this might be why she got so enthusiastically involved in ..."activism"... for down syndrome. it's an exciting role to play for her.

jody makes probably one single good point in his entire life, which is that hymie should stay connected to his chinese heritage. he obviously didn't care THAT much, and sheila wasn't really listening, because these two later separate hymie from family who DO want him (tommy and his mother) to participate in this fanciful idea.

sheila is, after that, somehow surprised to learn she feels lonely again! she desperately seeks out community however she can - this time in latching onto being 1/32nd menominee after taking a DNA test (as per my memory?) - there's not really anything wrong with wanting to know more about a part of your heritage, and if she'd been more normal about this, who would've fucking cared?

carl doing a crappy imitation of black culture while he believes himself to be 1/8th black is the closest comparison here. sure, sheila also might've really identified as native at that point, maybe she meant well! however, sheila is a grown adult, who tries to build this connection through children. carl, is, however fourteen years old, and he tries to get involved in black culture by hanging out with and emulating older people, befriending and protecting nick, and failing pretty embarrassingly at getting a date. even so, carl's behavior is cringeworthy enough to get commented on by pretty much everyone in the show.

and sheila's attempts to adopt these random children are the culmination of her "cute little baby" obsession - it doesn't escape my notice that she barely pays attention to the oldest (gary?) and focuses heavily on a little girl - and her desperation to find community. she again ignores frank's right to consent or not (and.. the legality of bigamy) to marry frank solely to acquire cute little kids, and, by her hope, a connection and real reason to be involved in a tight knit community.

one of the points at which joan cusacks acting really sticks out to me is when she's at the hearing in hopes of approval for her adoption, and she's sort of playing hard at being "in" group - to boost her chances at getting approved adoption, and because she really, really wants to be "in". she kind of believes she's getting there until the council start to talk to each other in menominee which she, of course, has no clue at the beginning of how to understand. they're just speaking in their own language, but she feels an acute sense of exclusion. when they conclude and simply say "no"- no explanation offered, because why bother to explain to someone who is not going to get it - she has this devastation on her face, because she realizes she was not going to be "in" anyway, no matter what.

when it comes to these kids, yeah, they may have wanted to live with her. but they're kids! they like wifi, and cool snacks, and tv. children deserve a lot more respect and to be trusted, but they also can't understand why it'd be harmful to grow up in a white christian household.

sheila reattaches herself to frank pretty aggressively in response to her new, new, new, old loneliness. she again views someone's daughter as a peer (or adversary) and not a daughter - though with sammi, at least she's a grownup with boundary issues.

sheila's writing is less compelling to me after this, but that might just be because when she really really does try to adopt these kids, i kind of blacked out from rage, and couldn't stand to really look at her. in my rewatch i might pick up on more in s5. she does get pretty involved in the gentrification plotline, though, which is well written, but super difficult for me to look at directly (high fives for anyone who will never afford a house in their hometown) i really hope that her independent sheila life will give her some self confidence by herself, so she'll feel better AND stop twisting herself into these convoluted choices and taking really bizarre kinds of advantage of people in an effort to find ANY community. but idk maybe she'll become a scientologist or something. who really knows

[casasupernovas]

honestly the way season 3 of doctor who dealt with race was ridiculous.

first of all, you're telling me this black family didn't have anything to say with the fact that their father had ran off with a younger white woman who he was spending all their 'inheritance' on? ever have martha address how this might have impacted her? maybe in how she views romantic relationships? how she is stuck in the middle? how annalise belittles her and only her mum really sticks up for her and her father doesn't?

let alone the show having the 'doctor' choose joan, the white racially prejudiced woman in the series where the black girl is in love with the white lead, and have a gag that he only goes for blondes; newflash, that translates to white. let alone give that black character any black romances in her series. the people who hit on her all season are all white; the doctor, shakespeare, riley, captain jack and tom. then to slap her character with the only other black character in the show was laughable. i don't care if their relationship was supposed to develop in torchwood, it never happened so they should have scrapped it. it was tacky af.

or have martha ever talk about the prejudice and stereotypes she would have had to deal with as a training medical student? medical racism in the nhs is very much a thing. we're still having to break racist ideas that black people don't face the pain the same way white people do in 2022.

then the shakespeare code? the doctor's stupid wide eyed innocent reaction to martha asking him if she was safe? first of all, why on earth did the doctor react that way to someone asking him if they are safe. almost every companion he has ever taken he got to know under extremely dangerous circumstances. so yeah they're gonna ask if they're safe. and when martha specifies her race, you have this 900 and something year old genius timelord just say to walk around like you own the place and point at the two black background talent in front of them to make it okay. i am well aware that slavery was not recognised as legal in london at the time but if you think those people weren't racist you're an idiot.

moreover, you have martha be surprised at the way shakespeare addresses her? "i can't believe i'm hearing this" - WHY. why tf would she be surprised given you had literally JUST had her voice her opinion about race? and have the doctor respond that it's 'political correctness gone mad?' are you serious?! ESPECIALLY considering shakespeare referred to her as a 'blackamoor' and only two years prior in history the queen had ordered for the expulsion and removal of them from london? there were many black servants working in london and the queen literally sent letters to 'masters' in london to transport them away to SELL THEM. so martha's claim was 100% valid. and even if historians debate whether or not these letters were ever sent, it confirms massive racial prejudice that was definitely not all in our heads. and we see firsthand the 'othering' of martha.

then you bring martha to 1930S NEW YORK. and racism is NEVER addressed because you threw in hugh quarshie?! because racism magically disappeared during the great depression? trying to push that the great depression made everyone realise they were in the same boat? bullshit! america was still under jim crow and racially segregated! black people were still getting lynched in america! the wall street crash only made race relations worse!!! the doctor has willingly taken martha to a dangerous era for her TWICE. something that may have been okay if we knew he took it seriously but for some reason the show makes him brush it off, making him seem like an asshole. the episode was five years off the harlem riots! new york was the epicentre of jim crow! race relations were at an all time low during the great depression. and the show conveniently ignores that.

then you get 1913. the only episodes that actually show racism for some reason. i still don't know whether or not the doctor or the tardis intentionally chose this era, i don't think he did but to never hold joan or john accountable for their actions towards martha? to practically reward joan by giving her narrative sympathy and have the doctor actively try to get her to travel with him? despite her being an explicit racist?

then martha gets stuck in the past AGAIN this time in 1969? poc who have lived in the uk for decades have repeatedly talked of how they would still encounter racism despite the race relations act of 1968. being refused service. refused goods. human decency. and you explicitly have martha work to support the doctor and make it a joke, like she's nagging him? knowing how much racism martha would have had to encounter to get the shop? note martha is having to work in a shop anyway. not to mention again their presentation as a mixed couple living together? less than 2% were married in the uk. and them just being together period still would have been a thing. not to mention the national front had been founded already and enoch powells 'rivers of blood' speech.

then the master enslaves the jones? show them being roughed up by police? this is the second time the show has had black characters forcibly subservient to white counterparts - first with martha, then with the jones family. maid outfits and all.

and you don't even address the doctor x martha pairing at all. only a couple years prior to the season being released the uk aired that racist episode of wife swap, exposing just how much people loathed the idea of interracial dating and how much racism was steeped in britain still. the closest the show ever got to addressing that was playing "sunshine" by arrested development in the first episode, a song about interracial love.

and i haven't even mentioned the implications of making the first black female companion in the show's history constantly and negatively compared the previous show's white romantic lead, and the show having the lead character uphold this sentiment and actively perpetuate this? giving the racist fans ammo and justification? with little to no repercussions due to the next season being so focused on being the grande finale that the show never has time to address it? so martha gets sandwiched in the middle and forgotten by the time of the christmas special?

the blatant disregard towards the black characters, particularly martha and general lack of any sort of historical research in series 3 is terrible.

[considermygenderminecrafted]

ok- while there is smth to be said abt wilbur making a burger van, i just find it hilarious that all these rlly clever ppl think that capitalism is the best way to get rich and powerful...

even if the server has no economy

theres also smth to be said abt how the most basic form of capitalism (aka not late stage capitalism) is not inherently good or evil, esp in a minecraft server, but i digress

/rp

Dude capitalism in Minecraft is summit I have been thinking about since hermitcraft season 7 started, it's Fascinating.

Cause like, TBF to the smart people, Capitalism (when it's set up proper) is Really good at creating compliance because like it's a very all encompassing system, it affects material reality (like in jobs n shit, you have to have a way of getting money to be able to participate in being alive) and also culture (like how iPhone is a symbol of status even tho it's shit and we all know it's planned obsolescence, we Keep Buying them because they're like a staple of how we view our own wealth and they're supposed to be good-).

So you have a system that fucks people over all the while people """voluntarily"" uphold it.

So, if Wilbur can actually set capitalism up its Really smart of him to do that! Cause it's a system that pretends to value individual's choice and choice of the consumer (how he sold it to ranboo) but in reality only a Very Few Number of people actually get the benefits!!

You don't have to be good at fighting or have a coup or set up an autocracy. It's all in the culture. It's not dissimilar to how Wilbur wanted to set up a one-party election with him as the de-facto winner because it gives people the illusion that they have consented to the heirachy. So like of they can pull it off capitalism is a great and sturdy system of control.

HOWEVER

I've never seen capitalism set up truly on a Minecraft server.

Because capitalism isn't just like, the existence of an economy, it's that like specific thing where someone else owns the equipment that you use to make things for them, and you sell your time and effort, and the person who owns the equipment gets all the profit.

And like, how the FUCK you gonna stop someone else mining and making the equipment and just selling the product they make directly in Minecraft??? You can't control the means of the production in minecraft? Everyone can just- make their own things if they want to.

So it's kinda hard to do...

I think the thing where he's gonna make labelled steaks that people wanna collect and buy, and make them so they can't be copied or faked, is like, definitely a decent shot at doing it. Cause if he can get that going it Really is a monopoly. Only he has the means to make them but he can have other people collecting the materials to do so. Like his products have built in iPhone vibes, you wanna collect them and show you have the latest ones even if it's just food. Automatic commodity fetishisation past their utility as food.

But yeah your right there are definitely other systems of control that could be used.

There's a book which I bought but I'm sure can be found.. elsewhere, called Modernism and Totalitarianism (Richard Shorten), which goes into depth about like how different forms of authoritarianism come to be, and how they differ from one another. The most interesting chapter is PART 2, part 1 just disproves other theories. There also this book called "Why America Fights (Susan A. Brewer)" which talks about the role of war propaganda within the establishing of patriotism and nationalism used for justifying power imbalances.

L'Manburg never really stuck with it's capitalism, which is in part probably why Wilbur wanted the election because it would have done a similar thing in manufacturing consent, but it kinda fell through cause of competition. BUT if you can weaponize competition to uphold the system?? Now you're talking.

For Wilbur and Q, who are both primarily good at manipulation rather than fighting, capitalism is a great option as a system of control.... If they can set it up

This is also why I kinda disagree that early stage capitalism is mostly harmless cause like the nature of capitalism is like, someone else makes money for nothing based on my work. It always fucks me over especially when money is required for... Living. Sorta inherently exploits people

[under-sedationnn]

asra x reader (request) - "pineapple juice"

anonymous: Number 37 from the 50 types of kisses with Asra (or Valerius if you write for the Courtiers, do you?) 👀

Word Count: approx. 500

prompt list here

37: Cleaning the other person’s lips with a lick and a kiss.

to answer your question anon, i do not write for the courtiers. i will write for any of the main six tho!! i hope that you enjoy this as much as i enjoyed writing it, especially since the prompt is a little more spicy than i generally write ;)

The sweltering heat of Vesuvian summers are damp and suffocating, and not even a calm, steady breeze helps against the rays of sun that beat down on the massive market crowds. Everyone stood fanning themselves, attempting to cool off any way they could. It was futile, though, due to the proximity from person to person. Heavy breathing mingled our exhales in the static air, and heat waves rose from the beaten dirt path and worn cobblestone.

I had left the shop only to pick up a few small things, Asra keeping an eye on the store. On my way back, as I excused myself through the dense crowd of travelers and townspeople, a small fruit stand came into view. Only, it was not full of apples, oranges, bananas, or any other fruit this stand usually sold.

Making my way toward the stand, I asked the owner, "What kind of fruit is this?" It really didn't even look like a fruit; it resembled a sea urchin much more than any plump, soft crops he had ever presented to the market before. My confusion must have shown by my expression, because the merchant only chuckled.

"Ah, these came on the trade ships just this morning! Many of them were shipped to the palace right away, but I was able to smuggle some."

"Right, so, what are they?"

"Oh, yes," he began, clearly having lost his train of thought, "they're called pineapples. They're tropical."

I picked one up and carefully examined it, gently poking the seemingly sharp spines on the side of the fruit. "Hm, alright," I moved it up and down in my palm, mentally weighing the large fruit, "how much do you want for one?"

"Five bit."

"Five? It's one fruit!"

"Yes, but it is a large fruit, and I stole it to sell. Consider it paying for the labor, as well. Five bit, nothing less."

Shifting the small coins between my fingers, I looked between the merchant and the fruit in my hand. He smiled smugly as I handed him the money.

"Pleasure doing business with you."

Let's just hope Asra knows how to cut this.

-----

"Asra, I'm back!" I called as I opened the door to the shop. I found Asra sitting on one of the small cushions we had littered along the floor, drinking a piping cup of tea.

"Seriously, tea in this weather?" I accused.

"It's worth the hot flash that follows," he joked, taking some of the items from my arms and restocking the shelves. "What are you holding?"

"This, apparently, is called a pineapple."

Turning to look at it, his eyes immediately lit up at the sight of the fruit. He grabbed it from my hands and began gazing at it with both curiosity and awe. "Where did you get this?"

"The market! From the merchant who sells all the fruit. He said he stole it from one of the merchant ships this morning, so it's a little battered and bruised."

"No, it's just ripe! Wow, Y/n, I haven't had one of these since I was a kid. Muriel and I used to snag them from merchant ships all the time at the docks."

"So I'm assuming that means you know how to cut it?"

Laughing, he responded, "Yes, I know how to cut it. It's not as hard as it looks, promise. Would you like to help?"

"No, thank you," I said, grabbing his abandoned tea from the floor, "but I will definitely let you cut it up and eat some when you're done."

Motioning for me to follow him up the stairs, he said, "Gotcha, go ahead and get some water and sit down."

After trudging my way up the stone steps, I all but collapsed into one of our small dining chairs, pouring myself a cup of slightly warm water and downing it in one go.

"So I'm guessing it's pretty hot at the market," he joked, and I watched his back as he cut up the fruit at the kitchen counter.

"Surprisingly so!" I responded.

"Well, this should serve as a refreshment for you."

Turning to face me, he presented a large bowl of bright yellow fruit. A puddle of juice sat in the bottom of the bowl, and the chunks of pineapple glistened in the bright sunlight filtering in through the windows. It looked delicious.

Before sitting down to join me, he grabbed he smallest chunk he cud find and set it on the table, Faust slithering up the leg to gobble it down quickly.

"Sweet!"

"Well, if Faust approves, then I guess it can't be too bad."

Asra and I both grabbed at the sweetest looking pieces we could find, and I immediately found pleasure in the bursting sweetness and tang of the fruit. Although warm from the weather, the fruit was rejuvenating. I smiled as I chewed, and Asra began to laugh at my expression.

"I told you it was good, didn't I?"

"You did, you did," I said as I grabbed another piece, "you just sometimes have... interesting tastes in food."

"Okay, listen, spicy honey was a good idea!"

"Only in theory," I teased, and he smirked at me, rolling his eyes and leaning forward slowly, "I couldn't get the taste out of my mouth to save my life. It stuck to all of my teeth."

"Well, I make up for it with other skills." He leaned forward still, holding a small chunk of pineapple between his fingers.

"Yeah? Like what?"

"Well... I can cut up a pineapple and you can't."

I laughed. "Right, what else?"

He made a face as though he were thinking, and I ate another piece of the fruit. The juice dribbled down my chin and onto my neck, leaving a trail from my mouth. His eyes hazed over slightly, an area of mischief radiating from his person.

"Well," he began, slowly inching forward to lean over the table, "I'm excellent at cleaning up."

I could feel his breath on my skin now, and my breath hitched as he brought his lips to my color bone. He put his hands on top of my own so that they wouldn't leave the table, our sticky, sugary fingers sticking to each other. He slowly placed sloppy kisses all the way to my mouth, licking away any trace of the juice I had left behind. He ended the action with a small kiss to my lips, and I leaned forward as he sat back down in his seat.

Blushing and overheated, he only smirked at me as he ate another piece of the fruit.

I cleared my throat, attempting to return to the previous conversation and rid my head of the thoughts that were now coming to mind.

"I can certainly attest to that. Maybe you could teach me sometime."

[giorgiastastes]

버닝 / Burning (2018)

"It's too close, you might not see it"

What to say about this movie...

The film itself is quite simple, even too easy at first sighting I'd dare to say, but the meaning behind, the interpretations and smart details is what makes it unique and pretty much a masterpiece.

I'm sure that most people, or at least those who usually watch unchallenging to elaborate movies, won't like it. If you're looking for something what will be "explained to you", for the director to give you that big plot twist or long monologue, you won't find it here. But if you want to watch a work of art that'll make you think, reflect and crash your minds, you have a good journey in front of you.

I remember that as soon as I've finished watching it I went online to look for theories, to see if someone else had the same idea as me, if I got it right and what I've missed, and then I planned to write here my thoughts on the real explaination, but after rewatching and searching I've figured it out BURNING doesn't really have a "true" explaination in my idea, or better, the director definitely knows what he believes is the so called truth, but the strength of it is how free of interpretations it is. I've read hundreds theories and honestly all of them could fit just right, so for once I've decided to do something different.

In here I will summarize all the theories, under layers and explaination that I've read, figured out or found, and I will leave to you, the reader, to believe your own "truth"

This will be full of spoilers, it's actually a summarization of the after watch, so read at your own risk, and since I'm taking for granted that you've watched the movie and remember it quite well too, I won't always repeat the plot when not necessary.

• Ben sells organs on the black market. That's how he gets his money and Haemi is aware of this, and decided to sell her own organs to pay off her debt. She even says I'D SELL MY ORGANS IF I WERE YOUNGER. She could also be unaware of this and that's why she dissapears.

• Ben is a serial killer. He seduces fragile women who are very easy preys to such an handsome and carismactic young man, and then gets rid of them after he gets tired. This happens about every couple of months, which corresponds to his journey in Africa timeline. They are the greenhouses he burns, because he knows nobody will look for them, and in fact the police does not care about the greenhouses, just like they don't care about missing women nobody knows about.

Ben also owns all the qualities of a maniac sociopath who's keen on control and feels no emotion or empathy. He never cries for example. He also feels pride in his crime and he's almost tempted to confess them to show how good he is. That's why he says to Jongsu that he will burn a greenhouse close to him, but he didn't mean it in a special terminology, but more like in an emotional sense. He will kill the the closest thing the other has, which is Haemi. He also states that she dissapeared like "smoke".

This would also be justified by the creepy call the protagonist receives by Haemi before she dissapears. The biggest evidence placed by the director to prove that this theory is the most correct one is in the last scene, where Ben is putting makeup on a new girl. For a non Korean speaker it's quite hard to get the reference but Makeup and corpses' cremation are spelled in the same way in the hangul language, therefore the movie showing us Ben doing the girl's makeup is the alternative way to say he's killed her and is now cremating the body, hence his obsession with fires.

He's the one who cleaned Haemi's room and took her cat. He also keeps his victims personal objects as a throphy of some sort.

• Ben is a pimp. He's the trainer for these beautiful, young but poor women who are ready to sell themselves when he convinces them to do so. This is shown as Haemi also become less and less shy as the movie goes on, as seen in the undressing scene, while being more bold and provocative too. He changed her drastically, or maybe only let her discover a different, more free, part of herself. He also applies makeup on them how he would do to a doll, playing dress up for a woman who's now becoming just an object of desire that can be bought.

• Ben is a human trafficker. He sends women into slavery while promising them a life of luxury and happiness. That's why he shows off his idyllic lifestyle, and then sells them in Africa (where he goes frequently), where they'll never be found.

• Ben is a life guru. He teaches unsecure and frustrated women to feel liberated and less oppressed, to leave it all behind and start from scratch. They pay him, that's why he's rich. He also keeps a "souvenir" of every woman he has turned. This could explain why he shows up to the meeting with Jongsu in the finale. If he actually killed or sold these women he wouldn't fall into the other man's trick.

• Ben doesn't exist. He's just the symbol of everything Jongsu is not but aspires to be. He's rich, confident, cultured and attractive. Every flaw and layer of insecurity Jongsu seems to have, Ben lacks. And in the end, when the protagonist finally becomes brave enough to mature, to actually chase the woman he loves, he's able to kill the shadow of himself that only reminded him of how miserable he was.

• Ben and Jongsu are the same person. Much Fight Club like, they're the same human being, just different, extreme sides of one. Jongsu could have a personality disorder or maybe we're just shown two sides of him that prove his mental health issues. That's also why Haemi seems to be involved with both of them without choosing a side, because one is the gentle but insecure fraction, the other the bold but arrogant one. And then, in the end, when such division is making him go insane, he decides to kill his alter ego.

• It's just a love triangle. One of my favorite songs of all time had a similar topic. There's the main character, a shy and quiet boy, who falls in love with a girl who feels foreign and unreachable to him. But he's not the only one in her life. She also has another lover who's much more attractive and manly in a way, and all three start to share this peculiar poliamorous love story, mostly platonic. She's very pretty and feels as free as Venus, torn between two men. Then one day she leaves, and she'll never come back. But while the second boy easily moves on with his life, figuring out it was just a näive fling, the singer remains stuck, obsessing over her day and night, trying to find answers and solutions just not to deal with the realization of her not loving him enough to stay.

• Every character represents a social stereotypes and criticism of modern South Korean classes. I think this is very straightforward, especially Jongsu's jealousy of Ben's wealth, and Haemi's attempt to RISE in the social pyramid, surrounding herself with high class people like Ben or his friends, even letting them make joke of her, to mock her, all of it just to feel part of their group and reality.

• It's all in Jongsu's head.

• The disappearance of Haemi, whether it happened or not or HOW it happened are not the main focus on the movie, which instead is the characters dealing with such loss and lack of knowledge on what happened. Much like the Russian movie Loveless (2017), where the event is only used as an artistical device to let the story progress and the characters' grief culminate. Maybe we really don't need to know what happened to her, maybe she's dead, maybe she's alive and better than ever, but to the movie's intent such information is superficial, it's just the human need to fill our curiosity when were too afraid to deal with the pain of remaining unaware of it. Jongsu is sure she's been killed and that brings him to his next move, but the viewer, he doesn't need to know, because he doesn't need to act, to keep the story going.

• Haemi might have killed herself. Ben is the only one who knows about this and that's why she gives him her cat. She also shows multiple signs of advanced depression, for more than half of the movie is almost like she's not there, like she's already just the memory, the ghost of a girl who once was there.

• The movie itself is just a metaphor. The metaphor is many times used by the characters and maybe not only as a word, part of a dialogue, but the overall film might be A BIG, CRIPTIC METAPHOR.

• Everything is hereditary. From family's fortunes and richness to behavior and inner rage. Jongsu was born poor and will die as such just like his father, and even though he seems like the most innocuous being, he's able to take out his rage on other just like this father. I guess it's in the genes.

• Jongsu is the calf. The calf represents Jongsu's pureness and naivety. And when he sells it, he's also selling his soul in a way.

• Haemi represents South Korea, Jongsu North Korea, Ben is the new Korea, the one always more and more Westernized.

• We're just reading the plot of Jongsu's book. When Haemi leaves for Africa he has plenty of time to write the story he's planning to put into words, and that's what he does. Everything we see after she comes back from her journey is just the plot of the book, and the creation of Jongsu's imagination.

• A modern reinterpretation of the Great Gatsby. Yes, obviously a VERY liberate view of the novel, but many details seem to be quite evocative.

• A criticism to how South Korea treats women. Even the movie itself does this, probably on purpose. The one who disappears is a woman, but the ones who are the main centre of attention are men. She's only a story device, never the real protagonist.

• Ben wanted Jongsu to discover his crimes so he could reach fame if the other ever made a book out of it. He's so full of himself he'd rather be punished for his crimes than never showing off how good he was at covering every proof. That's why he dies almost peacefully, and shed a tear, which he claimed to have never done before.

• The well Haemi reference to, symbolizes falling into prostitution. That's why Jongsu's mother knows about it too, since it's quite obvious she's now an escort. But she states the well is dry, as a way of saying that it's not how easy and fun it might seem.

• This is just the tragic story of a boy who's lost every possible source of love. From his father in jail, his mother who abandoned him, to the only girl that ever showed him affection disappearing, and a new friend who he decides to kill.

• Ben is Death or maybe the devil personified. He helps Haemi get the courage to end it one for all, and even pushes Jongsu to kill, cursing his soul.

[riverbills]

River lit the cigarette before responding to Eliza. He usually only received imports after mentioning Richard’s name to producers. So, he was going to savour the opportunity to smoke a fine cigarette with a herbal kick. Even though he was sure Mrs Tristan would somehow sense he was smoking in doors and scold him for it.“You're not spoiled. You're just a classy lady who knows she deserves the finer things in life. There's nothing wrong with that.” If they had this conversation when he was thirteen he would have twisted the knife ; would have made a snide remark about how she always got what she wanted. But the two of them weren't kids anymore. River’s jealousy died years ago and now Richard was dead too so any residual bitterness River felt about not being his favourite ward was pointless.

Growing up he had mixed feelings about Eliza's passion for performing. Eliza was proof that Richard's favouritism was arbitrary and decided for illogical reasons he couldn't control. She and River were both artsy theatrical kids but apparently she had a certain je ne sais quoi River lacked and couldn't achieve if he tried. That was both a frustrating and reassuring realisation to cope with. River's mouth twisted into a small exhausted smile at Eliza's comment about New York art kids. “What's it like dealing with the New York art kids? I've heard they're pretentious and obsessed with a sense of authenticity they'll never achieve. Is that true?” He asked. He moved to LA for school and never looked back. His primary experience of New York Art Kids came from a production of RENT he saw a week before his twenty-second birthday.

River let out a hollow chuckle at Eliza's words. There were parts of his life that were stable but he still didn't feel like a real adult. He definitely didn't feel like a real adult in Woodrow. “Oh please, I surf IMDB then flatter actors by telling them I knew they had potential when I saw them play an unnamed bully stock character. That's hardly a real adult job. It's not like I'm debating international policy.” It didn't sound like it but River was grateful for his frivolous job. He couldn't handle having a job that was monotonous and significant.

River let out another laugh at Eliza's questions. He didn't remember her being this funny. Or maybe he was just looking for an excuse not to feel miserable.He was always looking for an excuse to talk about himself so he was grateful she asked multiple questions at once.“Yup. I haven't had to give up on my dream yet, knock on wood.” River reached over to tap on the kitchen counter. He wasn't particularly superstitious but he wasn't going to risk tempting fate.”Here's a secret the mayor doesn't want you to know; LA isn't as hot as you'd imagine. Your brain just tricks itself into thinking it's hot because it's sunny and in theory it's convenient to go to a beach.” River had been in LA long enough to stop romanticising it but he would never stop romanticising the lack of rain. “It depends on if you find being stuck in traffic for two hours and having people who were in one season of days of our lives twenty years ago cutting in line for coffee dazzling.” His fond tone and small smile were in contrast to his sardonic words. LA was a cutthroat town where dreams went to die but it was also his home. “It is slightly miserable but it can't be more miserable than New York.” Everyone he knew who had worked in New York complained about the rent prices and lack of space. But lucky for Eliza she didn't have to worry about one of those things.

He almost dropped his cigarette when she said she saw one of his movies at the video store. “Are you being serious? I'm having a horrendous day ; you can't joke about something like that.” River had only managed to sell two scripts that were made into complicated movies. It was rare for producers to take a chance on scripts they didn't view as instantly profitable. Often River's ideas were about niche subject matter or made more sense on an emotional level than a narrative level. “I hope it had a girl chasing after a tour bus on the cover. That movie is my magnum opus.” His other movie was a low budget horror comedy about a married couple inconveniently turning into a werewolf and vampire at the same time. The studio ignored that it was an obvious metaphor for a lavender marriage. He stood in confusion while Eliza rummaged for Goldfish Crackers. It took him a second to work out why she was avoiding the buffet. River came to the conclusion she wanted comfort food over food from the funeral. “I'm not sure.” He responded while walking over to join Eliza on her search. “Do you know who visits regularly? They're probably too sophisticated for Goldfish Crackers. It can't hurt to check though. Mrs Tristan might have a secret fondness for them we don't know about.”

“i guess i am a bit spoiled.” she said, trying for humor but sounding contrived. unlike most other wards, she didn’t have any real memories of a life before woodrow, and all the luxuries that came with it. eliza never really considered herself more spoiled than any of the other however, a feeling she knew would be heavily contested. “but the new york art kids are really serious about their tobacco. if you don’t smoke with style they would probably say you shouldn’t smoke at all.” she took one of the cigarettes and played with it around her fingers, twirling and twisting with and odd grace. “hmm networking. it makes you sound so grow up.” she laughed hollowly. they were all grown. for the better or for the worse.

“you’re in la, right? is it as hot and dazzling and slightly miserable as i remember?” eliza was an east coast girl through and through, and her few memories of california were not very flattering. she once got a sunburn so bad at santa monica it landed her at the hospital. not her finest moment. “i saw one of your movies at the video shop the other day. it looked cool. artsy.” finally growing tired of playing with the cigarette, eliza abandoned it and her glass of whiskey, jumping off the counter and coming closer to investigate the remains of the buffet. the baked meats that coldly furnished the funeral table, her brain supplied, making her stomach churn immediately. so instead of looking at the food, she started opening cupboards. "do you think they still store goldfish here?"

[nancypullen]

Chugging Along

Hello, bloggy friends. I don't have a single interesting thing to share with you, but I feel the need to fill this space every so often. I kind of miss the days when I had a lot to write about, but I was also spread a little thin in those days, and I don't miss that at all. This blog was definitely funnier and more interesting back then, sorry about that. I've been staying busy tending to gardens and trying to empty this house. Whyyy do we have so much stuff? Ugh, 40 years together and a couple of kids equals a whole lot of junk. Our house doesn't have great storage and I've gotten creative over the decades in order to keep things semi-orderly. Now that I'm emptying closets and going through boxes and bins I feel like tossing everything into the back yard and having a bonfire. There are so many items that we don't use daily but we don't want to part with, then there are sentimental items, kid related stuff, and so on. Add to that the necessary pieces that make a house a home and it's enough to make me crazy. Nothing would make me happier than a house where everything is labeled and in its spot (of course, I'd like it labeled in an adorable floral and gingham way). Today a fellow came by to measure the bedrooms for new carpet. It's one of the few things we'll do before putting the house on the market. We'll probably paint the porch, maybe touch up trim here and there. This house will sell itself just fine without any major changes. In order to install the carpet the bedrooms will be emptied. The easiest thing to do would be to keep them empty, sell what we want to sell, and store what we want to take. BUT it's quite possible we'll have kids home for a visit before listing the house, so we'll need those beds back in place. I feel like we're shoveling the walk while it's still snowing. We're not in a hurry to list. Might be in a couple of months, might not be until spring. The mister waffles on that daily. He's under a lot of pressure at work right now, so I just agree with whatever he says on any given day. I'm used to his constantly changing mind. He's got a sabbatical coming up in October and he has said he'd like to use that time to move. I think he needs the vacation more. I'm pretty sure that the housing market will stay strong in our area, if we listed in early spring we'd probably make the same tidy profit. We'd also allow ourselves more time to prep for a move. That might give us time to build rather than buy at the other end. You can bet that any house we might build would have storage out the wazoo. I don't need a big house (not until Dyson debuts a riding vacuum ), I just need a well-designed house. Are you bored to death yet? Told you I didn't have much to write about. Here's something wonderful - my hydrangeas have never looked better!

Front yard and back, they're blooming like crazy.

Also, it's starting to look like I'm going to have a thousand cucumbers. I had a couple of little pickle bush plants and I wasn't sure they were doing well, so I picked up a little potted cucumber plant at Lowe's and stuck it in one of the raised beds. Now all of the plants are going nuts and producing little cukes left and right. We love crisp cucumbers in salads and just for snacks, but I may be driving around after dark sticking cucumbers in mailboxes.

How adorable are baby cucumbers?

This is the first time I've grown San Marzano tomatoes, and I'm only growing them for pizza sauce - supposedly they're the best, though I think that may refer to the San Marzano tomatoes grown in the volcanic soil around Mt. Vesuvius, not in my raised bed in Tennessee. They grow in long clusters and I'm finding them very interesting. Crossing my fingers for some stellar sauce.

The green pepper plants have birthed their babies too, and they're so stinkin' cute.

All of the herbs are healthy, and the lavender and speedwell are hosting bees.

Our little patch is an absolute delight right now. I love my gardens. I can't imagine not having a little space to grow things. I'm so happy when I'm out pulling a few weeds or giving things a drink. Occasionally I pet a fuzzy bee (they don't mind), or I watch the birds splash in the bird bath and make use of our feeders, and all is right in my world. There's usually a cat snoozing on the deck while I putter and that's exactly how it ought to be.

When I'm making my silly cards my desk is situated for optimum viewing of the gardens and the activity of birds, bunnies, squirrels, and deer. I love it.

Not a great pic snapped through that old screen - and a certain cat puts herself front and center the moment I pull my phone out to get a shot. You can just see the edge of my desk in front of her. She can be mid-nap in a sunbeam but she senses a photo op and pops her head up. Uncanny. So that's it. That's why I haven't blogged. Because no one wants to hear about cleaning out closets and talking to birds and cats. I'm so content in my little world but there's not much happening here. There's music, flowers, books, and good food...what else do you need? Maybe we'll get really wild and light a sparkler or two on the 4th of July, or maybe I'll completely lose control and make a dessert. Stand by for that riveting post! Just kidding, I'm actually taking some pics of products I love that I'm going to share with you. I'll get my thoughts together and share that tomorrow. It won't be any more interesting than this post but perhaps you'll find something you like. Hope so! I need to get back into the habit of blogging regularly so writing something is better than writing nothing. I apologize in advance for what you'll wade through until I'm back in the groove. Meetcha' here tomorrow. Take care of your sweet little self until then. XOXO, Nancy